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Sept 4, 1950 saw the introduction of the comic strip Beetle Bailey. On what fictional military installation does the comic strip take place?

There are more cases of H1N1 swine flu or similar '.!ir .. . being reported by area doctors, hospitals, day-care facilities and schools. As a result, schools and employers are taking steps to curb spread of the illness. All Baptist Health facilities, including Wolfson Children's Hospital, The hospital has asked that those experiencing any flu-like symptoms, including coughing, sneezing, fever or stomach upset, not visit in order to limit the spread of disease. Visitors at Baptist Health facilities may be asked to wear a mask to help prevent spread of the flu. Many hospital and local physicians' employees are wearing masks and other protective gear to help prevent spread of the disease. that only parents, legal guardians, spouses or significant others come to the hospital to visit patients. Parents and legal guardians are being asked not to bring children age 5 and under to visit patients in the hospital as an additional precaution against spread of the flu. This age group is at higher risk for H1N1 and is contagious for a longer period of time than older chil- dren and adults. In an Aug. 27 letter to parents, Nassau County Schools Superinten- dent John Ruis urged precautions, especially "to keep ill children out of school which will help stop the spread of the disease." "You or your child will experience a sudden onset of fever (higher than 100), cough, runny nose, sore throat, FLU Continued on 3A HEATHER A. PERRY of vital importance." News Leader While surfing the web last sum- mer, Watford came across the Meals re'ss a new program in place on Wheels Association of America akes it easier for seniors who website and found that an initiative Meals on Wheels to feed their called We All Love Our Pets Vith the creation of Meals on (WALOP) was created in 2005 in sFor Pets, animal companions response to the discovery that many :ceive high quality food to Meals on Wheels recipients were proper nutrition and good sharing their meals with their pets. "I live for my dogs so regardless borah Watford, local program of whether I eat, my dogs are going zer, understands how much to be fed," said Joan Blackburn, ' cats and dogs mean to them. whose three dogs Sawdust, Willie ave an 83-year-old mother who and Angel are program participants. one with her toy poodle, Dolly. Watford approached the Nassau how important Dolly is to my County Council on Aging to see about r's emotional and physical putting a similar program together and I knew that there had to here in partnership with the Nassau ior citizens in Nassau County Humane Society, where she was vol- vere in the same position. unteer coordinator for about nine times, a pet is the only com- months. that an older person has and g that pet healthy and happy is PETS Continued on 3A Nassau County Road and Bridge Department employees have accused their boss of unsafe working condi- tions, abusive language and misuse of county resources. A petition signed by 47 of 55 department employees, including three supervisors, expressed a "vote of no confidence" in Superintendent Butch Hartman's leadership. The Aug.10 letter to Nassau County Coordinator Ed Sealover urged him to "make the necessary leadership changes." Sealover said he would review the allegations and report his findings to the county com- mission. Hartman sent Sealover a rebuttal letter, responding to each of the 11 issues listed by the employees. "I have been the Road and Bridge Superintendent since 2003, my pri- mary concern is to perform the duties and responsibilities required by my position, my boss and the Board of County Commissioners," he wrote. "I have always tried very hard to treat the employees in the Road and Bridge Department and the rest of the county with respect and integrity. I have my directives from my boss and I carry them out. Some employees in Road and Bridge Department strongly disagree with these directives and they don't use the proper chain-of-command." Cary Silcox, a union steward with the Northeast Florida Public RYAN SMITH County Coordinator Ed Sealover News Leader told the commission the dirt was needed immediately for cover when The Nassau County Commission the landfill closes around Sept. 30. approved the purchase of $275,000 State Department of Environmental worth of dirt Tuesday. The decision Protection regulations stipulate the came at an emergency meeting con- cover must be in place within seven vened to discuss closure require- days of closure. ments for the West Nassau Landfill. "Because of the time frame, com- The commission agreed to pur- petitive procurement simply cannot chase 55,000 cubic yards of dirt at $5 be done," Sealover said. per cubic yard - more than twice the The commissioners were dis- price of the dirt currently being used, turbed that the issue was just coming which Interim Landfill Director Lee before them. Most were inclined to Pickett said wasn't suitable for the blame Golder and Associates, the final cover. Jacksonville firm contracted to con- "It's never really been an issue sult on the landfill, for not informing because it's a disposable product," them of the time frame. he said. "... Now we're up to the top "Originally we thought there was layer, and it's not good enough mate- a 180-day time frame to get this done, rial." and we've been working along those Pickett told the commission that lines," said Commission Chair Barry the dirt currently used wouldn't hold Holloway. "Now it's down to seven together well enough to keep the days, and that bothers me.... How are waste in the landfill covered - par- ticularly after a hard rain. LANDFILL Continued on 4A Property tax value drops, but some bills go up RYAN SMITH While the total taxable value of real estate in Nassau County dropped this year, many individual homeowners may see their property taxes go up thanks to a little- known clause in Florida's Save Our Homes Act. Some newer homeowners may see a drop in their tax bill, while some owners of older, homesteaded properties may see an Stiles increase, according to Nassau County Property Appraiser Tammy Stiles. Total taxable value of Nassau County real property is about $7.4 billion, accord- ing to a preliminary certification of the tax roll. That's a 3.6 percent decrease from last year's total taxable value of about $7.7 bil- lion. However, many categories of taxable property have increased in value, according to the property appraiser's office. For instance, total taxable value for single-fam- ily residences saw a 0.29 percent jump. Taxable value on mobile homes was up 7 percent. Condominium values, on the other hand, dropped by nearly 11 percent. So why are some residents' taxes going up while others see theirs drop? According to Stiles, it is due to the so-called "recap- ture" clause, a little-known 1995 addition to the 1992 Save Our Homes law. The law placed a 3 percent cap on annu- al property tax increases. However, the recapture rule demands that a property's tax continue to increase until it meets the home's market value. For example, say a home purchased 10 years ago has a market value of $200,000. Because of the 3 percent annual tax cap, that home's assessed value is much lower - say $125,000. Because of the housing market decline, the home's value drops to $150,000. That's still $25,000 more than the homeowner is being taxed on -which TAX Continued on 4A News-Leader INDEX LEISURE ........................................................ B SA TUR LE NESING SEASON 155thyear No 71 CLASSIFIEDS .............................. 3B OBITUARIES ................................................................ 2A 2009Nests:89 Hatchlings:4273 Copyright 2009 CROSSWORD/SUDOKU.....2B OUT AND ABOUT .................2B 2nestslostdueto storms The News leader EDITORIAL .................................. 7A SCHOOLS............................................... 12A Please turnofforredirelightsshing Fernandina Beach, FL k FISHING ..................................... 14A SERVICE DIRECTORY ...................... 4B directly on the beach For a detailed count 1 84264 0001 33 newsprntwthsoy based nk HOMES ..................................................... 10A SPORTS .................................................... 12A see . am ediaislandseaurtlewatchcom. Sat Office hours are 830 a.m. to5:00p.m. Monday through Friday The News-Leader is published every Wednesday and Friday by The Fernandina Beach News-Leader, 511 Ash Street, P.O. Box 766, Fernandina Beach, FL 32034. Periodicals postage paid at Fernandina Beach, Fla. (USPS 189-900) ISSN# 0163-4011. Reproductions of the contents of this publication in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher are prohibited. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to: News-Leader, P.O. Box 766, Fernandina Beach, FL 32035. The News-Leader may only be sold by persons or businesses authorized by the publisher or circulation director. NOTICE TO ADVERTISERS: The News-Leader assumes no financial responsibility for typographical errors in advertising. When notified promptly, the part of the advertisement in which the typographical error appears will be reprint- ed. All advertising is subject to the approval of the publisher. The News-Leader reserves the right to correctly classify, edit or delete any objectionable wording or reject the advertisement in its entirety at any time prior to scheduled publication if it is determined that the advertisement or any part thereof is contrary to the gen- eral standard of advertising acceptance. SUBSCRIPTION RATES Mail in Nassau County ............. . . .$36.00 Mail out of Nassau County ............. $63.00 NEWS DEADLINES areas of the county may have gotten up to five inches of rain since Monday. Thursday morn- ing, however, Elkins said the situation looked good. Bridge and other agencies this morning, we have no street flooding, no road closures, no houses intruded by flooding, so all we have is good news," he said. "We did have some streets yesterday with stand- ing water, but they weren't impassable. People could still '.. We have no street flooding, no road closures, no houses intruded by flooding, so all we have is good news.' FRANK ELKINS, get down those roads, they just needed to slow down and give themselves some additional areas received the most and had the two reports of standing water in the roadways," he added. "It was US 17 at Goodbread Road and Biscayne Road in Callahan, like I said, those roads were not im- passable. We just wanted peo- ple to slow down and give themselves some additional time. That was about 11:45 or 12 yesterday afternoon when we got those reports. We did have an unconfirmed report at State Road 200 in Timber Creek (subdivision in Yulee) that the ditches were over- flowing onto the road, but by the time Road and Bridge got out to look, the water had sub- sided." the rain was minimal - but cau- tioned that more rain could mean flooding. "(There have been) a few downed limbs, some yard that we know of, and no flood warning today that we know of," he said. 'That's not to say that won't change when the rain comes, because the soil is saturated right now. There's not much place for the water to subside to." The Nassau County Tradtion since 1931 Visit Our Life Stories at www.OxlevHeard.com practice food safety � food, for at least 20 seconds before to a minimum o whether at and after handling food. They F and leftovers home or should also wash cutting roles should ha' t eating in a boards, countertops and uten- nal temperature S restau- sils with hot soapy water degrees E rant," before and after preparing * Chill. Bact Bronson each food item. Rinse fresh fastest at tempe said. "It's fruit and vegetables under between 40 and n't see that can running tap water and rub F so chilling foo en it comes to firm-skin produce with a veg- an important foi other disease etable brush. tice. Chill leftov oorganisms." * Separate. Cross-contami- hours and keep rtment and the nation can cause bacteria to 40 degrees F or aurant and spread and consumers need Refrigerate or fi ociation, also a to "think safety" before they poultry, eggs ar he Food Safety even leave the grocery store. ishables as sooi fense Advisory When shopping, keep fresh after purchase. helped in putting produce separated from should be put ir deo done by kids household chemicals and raw tainers so the fc iow how easy it is meat, poultry or seafood. more quickly, p s on to food with- Store fresh produce separate- teria from grow it. The video has ly from raw meat, poultry and important to ne on YouTube and seafood in the refrigerator, food at room ter by logging onto Use a different cutting board Food has to be I ent's Food Safety for meats and vegetables to temperature du avoid contamination. Consumers can tate.fl.us/fs/. * Cook. It is important to three ways: in tl portant food safe- use a food thermometer to be tor, in cold water are in proper sure food is cooked to the microwave. ind handling of proper temperatures. Cook More food s; home. Here are roasts and steaks to a mini- tion can be found mum of 145 degrees F, poul- department's w Wash hands and try should have a minimum www.doacs.stat, n. People need to internal temperature of 165 ing to the Divisi hands with soap degrees E Cook ground meat Safety. OBITUARY Mr. Robert W. (Bob) Milner, Sr., passed away August 26 in Big Bend Hospice House in Tallahassee. November 26, 1925 in Sheffield, Al. and served in the US Navy during WWII aboard the USS Oak Hill in the South Pacific Theatre. He was an excellent signalman who learned Morse Code as a Boy Scout and put it to use during WWII. After the war, Mr. Milner became em- ployed with National Container Corp. in Jacksonville where he met his future bride Billie Thompson, whom he married Mr. Milner spent many years in the insurance and real estate business, retiring from Gulf Life Insurance Company. In addi- tion to the insurance business, Mr. Milner also managed a tire store, Dairy Queen restaurant and sold cars in Starke, Fl. He worked in Madison County, where he served on the School Board, and Starke, Fl. before moving to Tallahassee in 1977. He was an active member of Fellowship Baptist Church and a member of the Masonic Lodge for over 50 years. After retire- ment, Mr. Milner drove for retired Judge Gus Fontaine and local attorney Chip Beal. Mr. Milner was preceded in death by his father and mother, Pitt Milner and Cecile Brown, and a sister, Elizabeth Kiser. He is survived by his wife of 62 years, Billie Milner; a sister, Frances Seifert of Evanston, Illinois; six sons: Richard (Julie) of Omaha, AR, Mark (Lynn) of Tallahassee, Bob Jr. (Carol) of Starke, Fl., Kevin (Heather) of Green Bay, WI, Tony and John (Paula) of Tallahassee. He is also survived by fourteen News-Leader strives to make this list a complete record of deaths involving Nassau County resi- dents and their families. Please ask your funeral home or crema- tion society to fax us or e-mail us with all death notices. Death notice listings are free and include the deceased's name, place of residence, age, date of death, service date and name of the funeral home or cremation society handing the arrangements. For a paid detailed family-placed obitu- ary, have your funeral home fax (261-3698) or e-mail the informa- tion to sperry@fbnewsleader.com. Deadlines are noon Tuesday for the Wednesday newspaper and noon Thursday for the Friday newspaper. Any billing questions J can be directed to the business office at 261-3696. I[ City I Lo Condil. I BLACK FRIDAY, September 4, 2009 NEWS News-Leader FEES Continued from 1A The principal reason for the fee increase, he said, is because of a rise in electrical rates. He said the increase would cost the average home- owner $8-9 more a month. The Parks & Recreation fees, mostly for non-city res- idents, but also decreased a few fees. she would like to see the Peck Community Center reception room rented to non- profit groups at no charge. Parks & Recreation Director Nan Voit told her that non- profit groups can already use many of the city facilities, including the Peck reception room, at no charge unless they are holding a fundraiser. City Fire Chief Dan Hanes said his department made one change that will save some residents money. Instead of a flat-rate inspec- tion fee, he said, the depart- ment will now charge by the size of the structure. reviews, he said, were also reduced significantly, from 75 percent to 35 percent of the building permit. But emer- Pop( orn3$ 00, Dr1nk $1 00 Tme Travelers Wiiij~m ife PG-13ii','Biif "We have to make sure all the required materials are don't get a penny of revenue until that permit goes out." The department also pre- sented a detailed outline of the city's costs for issuing each permit. According to the document, it takes a permit clerk an hour and 25 minutes, and over two hours for the building administrator to work on each permit. The building inspector also spends two hours on each permit. Total cost to the city, according to the evaluation, is $102.70 for each permit request. It will now also cost cus- tomers $50 for the city to send a letter to the Department of Environmental Protection, and $25 more for revisions to the letter. Building plans will now cost $25. The department also gave an example of total per- mit fees for a newly con- structed 1,000 square-foot home. If your child exhibits flu- like symptoms, keep them home from all activities such as after- school programs, dances, movies and other events where people gather." * "Stay home when you are sick. Limit your contact with other people." Teach your child to cover their coughs and sneezes with tissues or by coughing into the inside of the elbow. Dispose of used tis- sues properly, and then wash hands thoroughly. Practice these steps and use them every time you cough or sneeze." * "Wash hands with soap and water. Teach your child to wash their hands frequently with soap and water for 20 seconds (singing the "Happy Birthday" song twice). Set a good example by doing this yourself." * Teach your child the proper use of hand sanitizer. Gels, rubs and hand-wipes work well, as long as they contain at least 60 percent alcohol. Dispose of hand wipes properly. Always read and follow label instructions when using Seasonal flu shots are now available, though a vaccine for the swine flu will not be available until next month. No deaths from the swine flu have been reported in Nassau County. Not all cases are being confirmed by testing; medical with flu-like symptoms on the assumption they may have this particular virus. Some doctors of such patients per day this week. Rollin' on the River, a scenic Sunday cruise to St. Marys, Ga., sponsored by Amelia River Cruises to ben- efit Meals on Wheels for Pets, will be held Sept. 13. Tickets are $25 roundtrip and tax deductible. Ferry will depart the city marina at 10:30 a.m. and leave St. Marys at 1:45 p.m. Take a tram tour for $2.50, or bring your bike to cycle through the historic downtown. The ferry is pet friendly. Call Amelia River Cruises at 261-9972 or e-mail info@ameliarivercruises.com to reserve a spot and advise whether you are bringing a bike. Space is limited to 80 seats. In search of grant money, Watford got in touch with the Banfield Charitable I H I ln M J e7' t 1 Sept 11,2001 / Friday, Sept 11,2009 Campbell Flowers by Shirley Page 82 Passedon 1/2 dozen roses to friends and businesses in Aug 27, 2009 our community with the understanding that they keep one rose and pass each of the other five roses on to their friends and neighbors. Born Aug, i8, 1927 in Cincinnati. The Local Fire/Rescue Truck will be there from 11-2pm Retired in Fernandina. She has 5 Passing out fire hats to the kids. sons, nieces, grand-children, son in Bubbles is giving customer appreciation cards, discount coupons & cookies. law, brother. Thank you Baptist Med. Mega Bite is giving free anti-virus screening. Community Hospice Ramona. Tony Ryals Art of Hope will demonstrate his talent . and skill, by painting with his mouth. She Loved cards, travel, - Surrounding businesses are also participating. Come & see! & church at St. Michael's & St. Peter's 96110 Lofton Square Ct (Winn - Dixie Shopping Center) (904) 261-3855 Come see our newly remodeled store and save during our Labor Day Sale! Save we just now knowing we need different material? We have a consultant on board we pay thousands of dollars to advise us, and they should have known the cover we were using wasn't going to work." "(The DEP) doesn't play around, and to get to this point and get caught with our who's been homesteaded may only have a taxable value of $51,000," still within reach of the recapture clause, she said. The total number of prop- erties granted the $25,000 by 74 this year. However, Stiles said homesteaded prop- erty owners are by and large still paying less than new homeowners. Your LOCAL news source fbnewsleader.com File online to contest valuations All Value Adjustment Board petitions and filing fees relating to issues of valuation, and such other categories including tangible personal property, etc., must be filed with the Clerk of Courts on or before the 25th day following mailing of the Notice of Proposed Taxes (Truth in Millage or TRIM). Forms approved by the state Department of Revenue for filing petitions to the Value Adjustment Board may be obtained from the Nassau County Property Appraiser's office, the Clerk of Court's office or at www.nassau.clerk.com or the www.myflori- da.com/dor/property/vabwb/vabrules.html. In addition to filing in person or by mail, petitioners may now file online accessing the link on the clerk's website: www.nas- sauclerk.com/axiaweb2009. Online petition filing fees shall be paid via credit card (Master Card, Visa, Discover orAmerican Express). A $5 non-refundable credit card processing fee is applied. The petitioner has the option to create a password in order to follow along his/her par- ticular petition throughout the review and approval process. Check the clerk's website for further details. Value Adjustment Board meets Thursday An organizational meeting of the Nassau County Value Adjustment Board will be held at 5 p.m. Thursday at the James S. Page Governmental Complex, 96135 Nassau Place, Yulee. The organizational meeting will be for the purpose of making available the uniform rules of procedure for petitions to be heard by the Value Adjustment Board. The public is invited to attend the meeting to obtain a copy of the uniform rules of procedure and to ask any questions regard- ing petitions and procedures to be made to the Value Adjustment Board. The rules of procedures and process for the Value Adjustment Board have changed considerably; therefore, any person who has filed a petition to the Value Adjustment Board is encouraged to attend to understand the procedures that will be utilized. ROADS FRIDAY, September 4, 2009 NEWS News-Leader September is full of military history September is always a dif- ficult month for me when selecting events to cover, and this year is no exception. Because Americans are scat- many dates will be honored around the world, some only locally. Others may cause a momentary sense of recogni- tion, but to me all warrant a few minutes of our busy, daily lives. Some are fond memo- ries, some are not. I hope you'll join me throughout the month when I expand upon some events while others I'll have to forgo until next year. With the onset of the Korean War, cartoonist Mort Bailey. Since Sept. 4, 1950, Beetle Bailey has entertained thousands for over the past 59 years. Some may not feel Beetle falls into the category of historical, but to many of the era he helped them laugh when pressures of the war took their toll. It was 233 years ago the United States of America adopted a new name. It was on Sept. 9, 1776 that the Second Continental Congress changed the name of our great nation from the United Colonies to the United States of America. September 11 took on new meaning for all Americans so it's very appropriate that at 8:46 a.m. on this date a moment of silence across the nation will be observed. It's an official "Day of the memory of the nearly 3,000 who died in the Sept. 11, 2001 terrorists' attacks. H I I (D RIN' three events on the calendar of history. In 1862 it's record- ed as the bloodiest day in U.S. military history when at the Battle of Antietam during the Civil War more than 23,000 were killed or wounded. It is also Citizenship Day, a special day for all citizens, both native born and for those who chose to become Americans Day. It was in 1787 that the Constitution of the United States of America was final- ized, however it would be two more years before each state met and voted on its accept- ance. This next date in the time- line is near and dear to my heart since I retired from this military branch of the armed forces. It's Sept. 18, the date the U.S. Air Force celebrates its 62nd birthday. Formerly part of the Army Air Corps, this aviation unit gained its independence in 1947 and "Above All." Its mission is to deliver sovereign options for the defense of the United States and its global interests, and to fly and fight in air, space and cyberspace. Recognition Day is the third Friday of September and this year falls on Sept. 18. It's a Take the H&R Block Income Tax Course and earn extra income preparing taxes* Whether or not you go on to become a tax professional, you'll be able to complete your own return and help others with theirs. Bilingual students encouraged to enroll! For class times and locations, visit hrblock.com/class or Enjo9 the best breakfast in the area. Homemade biscuits, cinnamon rolls, sausage, hand-cut home fries, made to order omelet's and eggs. Not to mention our delicious specials! Barbara Jeans is the winner of the 2009 Best of the Best Restaurant 7th year in a row. ON AMELIA ISLAND 960030 GATEWAY BLVD. (904) 277-3700 Visit one of our other locations in GA and SC! For a listing, visit our web 5ite! Also available through our on-line store: gift cards, Barbara Jean5s cookbook5, and we ship our famous Crab Cakes, She Crab Soup, Chocolate Stuff Dessert and signature Pumpkin Bread & Jalapeno Cornbread FRESH anywhere in the continental United States! Theu maLe the perfect gift idea! Barbara Jean's i5 family owned & operated! www.barbarajeans.com Barbara Jean'5 15 isfamil owned & operated! day of remembrance nday of a voice for America's largest ill hold organization of combat veter- ze ans, approximately 1.5 million vas cre- members. The organization is men dedicated to providing a place hters for everyone who sacrificed es to abroad in our nation's con- s of lib- flicts. This elite organization [d a few will celebrate those achieve- Save ments on Sept. 29, its 110th anniversary. end to the Berlin Airlift. The airlift was a massive effort to supply two million people of West Berlin with food and necessities during the ed in May 1948. The blockade was instituted in the hopes the Allies would be forced to abandon West Berlin. Though the blockade ended in May 1949, the airlifts continued until Sept. 30, 1949 tallying approximately 277,000 flights and is listed as the largest air- lift support the world has seen to date. include all significant dates of past Septembers, for it's a newspaper, not a novel, but several facts are constant. We can't hop back to the past and change history, so mark your calendars, remember these events and how they've marked our lives forever. Debbie is a 22-year veteran, retired Senior Master Sergeant in the Air Force and a Life Member ofAmerican Legion dened. An outbreak will not only bring people who have H1N1 into hospitals and doc- tors' offices - you'll also see the "worried well." Plan now to deal with the influx of patients that could come with an outbreak. At the national level, scien- tists at the National Institutes of Health, the CDC and the Food and Drug Administra- tion are working with vaccine manufacturers to make sure that an H1N1 vaccine is not only safe, but that the virus is not changing in ways that would reduce a vaccine's impact. They expect to have a vaccine ready this fall. that certain groups of the population receive the H1N1 have been identified as being more susceptible to suffering Oyster Bay Harbors' Water views from almost every room, spacious 4567 SF Home, open floor plan superb for entertatnmg Owner's sutte on ether level, screened lanai w/hot tub, gourmet latchen, gated commurnty Yacht club membership avail/$1,295,000 #47986 olvng ea and e 1l bath Flat may be rted M y upgrades ot p co ote a a e, ard ap our p pn fothesquaefootagenAn elhaPak $659,900 #48326 iw - r - THIS BEAUTIFUL, 3BR/2 5BA "Arts-N-Crafts" YOUR OWN PIECE OF PARADISE. 3BR/25BA Some overlooking tidal creek on 125 acres which S includes 1/4 acre lot across the street perfect for build- Sg a garage for car or boat storage Beautiful wood floors in entry, great room with fireplace, upgraded S" ' ' then, 4th bedroom or bonus room $369,000 [i ' , " , ,:. . ..... - * , . ... ' " ' " #46283 BEAUTIFUL AND SPACIOUS 42749 approx sq ft 4 bedroom, 3 bath on the lake i Grande Parke m Flora Parke Large utility room, gourmet kitchen, stainless steel appliances, split bedroom and open floor plan and 3-ar garage Relax by the lake For a brick home with this footage, this won't last long $350,000 MLS# 48332 TOTALLY REMODELED - Adorable 3BR/2BA home 1 block to beach, large lot backs up to Ft. Clinch, ocean view from 2nd fl balcony & living room, gramte countertops, wood & tile floors. Master suite on 1st floor. Just beautiful ! $424,900 #46413 floor furnished unit Beautifully decorated, immaculate and well taken care of condormuum, perfect for vacatin or rtntalSpacious parking, pool by the beachside, and a easy walkway to the beach $375,000 #40660 )ME in gated Lanceford Crek Wonderful unobstructed ocean views overlooking park GORGEOUS 4BR3 5BA PLUS 5th ROOM FOR OFFICE OR ng mom & 53'x3 sned pool from large wrap around balcony Spacious latchen over- DEN, Iefm-nth home ml gated cm.nty, with memberskIp to o's aaOegs looking great room and dmmig room Split floor plan with Yat Clb abl Am nl me w g pl dtn nets, gmte counttops d a 48" Jack & Jill bath between guest rooms Great to live year chen-with gt~ttorrh h la~ l a aind golkmt pios degn a es m round and/or short term rental Pool and spa make for a pntry The lage dIm, g m &hlig & , have blt-ms Alage BR & med rom womng kt perfectplace9to9be scrn42 d ld erlakshelemdabat ftts $499,000 MLS#49926 ive d 3-c1 gage $ 470, MLS# 46384 BLACK The views expressed by the columnists and letter writers on this page are their own J and do not necessarily reflect the views of I the newspaper, its owners or employees Wanderlust I recently worked on a story about a youth who spent five weeks of his summer traveling through Australia, New Zealand and the Fiji Islands. Visiting the website for the group he traveled with, I was able to download their brochure, detailing all the different tours available. The group offers trips to places all over the world, including France, Australia, Greece, Italy, and many other countries. As I read the descriptions of the sights to be seen and activities to be enjoyed, an intense case of wanderlust my heart beat a little faster. A recurring dream of riding a horse across fields of purple heather feeds my fer- vor to see Scotland. Or how about visiting Ireland to explore the homeland of my ancestors? Thatched roof cottage, anyone? And who can discuss travel without men- tioning Paris? I've daydreamed about sitting in some little sidewalk caf4 sipping coffee, listening to snippets of French conversa- tions or walking through the Louvre, com- ing face to face with all the incredible works of art on display there. European travel is one thing, but when it comes to real adventure, for my money nothing could beat hiking through a tropical rain forest, climbing a mountain path in South America or riding a camel beside the Pyramids. What a thrill it would be to follow a herd of elephants across an African savannah or listen to the dingoes bark while toasting marshmallows over a campfire in the Australian outback. The chance of me having even one of these experiences is about as likely as win- ning the lottery. Of course, if I actually DID win the lot- tery, once I'd paid my bills and doled out a bunch of money to family and favorite chari- ties, you better believe I'd hightail it to the nearest travel agent to begin planning the trip of a lifetime. Until then, I guess I'll have to be content to remain an armchair traveler. At least there are no pesky inoculations or passports involved! The Corporate Volunteer Council of the Nassau County Volunteer Center has announced that the 9th annual G.O.KI.D.S school supply donation campaign, held in July and August, was once again very successful. G.O.KI.D.S raised over $8,000 worth of actual school supplies and additional monetary donations, all of which was distributed to the Nassau County Schools for children and fam- ilies in need. Over the last nine years, over $100,000 worth of school supplies and dona- tions have been distributed to the Nassau County Schools. Among the corporate entities and agencies which help collect the school supplies and donations are Osprey Village; Century 21; First Coast Community Bank; First Federal Savings Bank; First National Bank; Owens, Van Etta & Kitson, DDS; the Barnabas Center; the Plantation Shop; Rayonier; Smurfit-Stone Container Corp.; city of Fernandina Beach; Nassau County Public Library; and Branch Banking and Trust, which held a festive luau to support the campaign. The distribution venue was donated by VyStar Credit Union. Gail Shults, Executive Director A day like no other It was a day like no other. Certainly it was not like any day that I have seen since becoming your Tax Collector. After some 20 years without an increase, the fees charged by the state of Florida for driver licenses and vehicle registrations were changing overnight. Aug. 31 was a day of long lines of frustrated tax- payers trying to beat the clock as it ticked toward fee increases. During the day, reports filtered in from other Florida counties about arguments and fist fights erupting between citizens waiting in those long, long lines at their locations. But I am pleased and proud to report that in Nassau County, those types of behaviors did not occur. Our cit- izens were courteous and kind. I personally saw a line of more than 75 people not just allow, but encourage, an elderly lady to pass to the front of the line. I witnessed uni- formed Naval personnel being pub- licly thanked for their service to our country. They were even invited to move ahead in the line without a murmur of protest from their fellow citizens. These are examples of why I am proud to be your Tax Collector, to live among you and to raise my fam- ily here. It is the character of the people that really counts, and we have that character in abundance here in Nassau County. But, in getting back to the events of Aug. 31, let me share some sta- tistics with you: In a county where 54,600 people are eligible to transact business with our office, we processed 2,105 transactions. That is equivalent to one out of every 25 people in our county doing business at one of our five offices. In order to handle the heavy traffic, the dedi- cated individuals on the staff of the Tax Collector's Office skipped their lunch breaks, and kept working into the night. In some locations they worked well past 8 p.m. Of course, we had a few people who were openly rude to the em- ployees and argumentative about the long lines. I really feel that these individuals must have been unaware that this was a one-time event and certainly not indicative of the normal work environment at the Tax Collector's Office. Normally, there are brief waits, if any. I know, because I regularly time the trans- actions which occur in our offices. So, my thanks go out to each of you, staff members and citizens alike, who spent some part of Aug. 31 in the Tax Collector's Office. As I said, it was a day like no other! John Drew Re: the article covering the Fernandina city budget meeting Vice Mayor Eric Childers is quot- ed in the article saying that Micah's Place Domestic Violence Center was financially strong and that the city should divert $100 of the $600 allot- ted to Micah's Place to another need. Yes, Vice Mayor Childers, Micah's Place Board of Directors and staff have been good stewards of the funds and gifts with which we have been blessed. We can't afford not to be. Our shelter makes the dif- ference between life and death to women and children in our com- munity. The doors must remain open, the help line must be answered and the needs of our sur- vivors must be met. Where else would they go? The shelter operates 365 days a year, 24 hours a day. We have been at or over capacity 80 percent of the last two fiscal years with nearly 240 women and children placed out of county due to the demand for our shelter services. Let me explain that the $100 you have suggested be removed would provide a night of safety and rest for a battered woman and her three children. Can we real- ly put a monetary value on that? How could we possibly turn away that family in crisis? It is my opinion that no social service agency should have to worry about funding. Unfortunately, it is a sign of our current economic cli- mate that we all are experiencing a drop in d, ,rai. ,, . government fund- ing and fundraising revenue. It is during this time that we are all expe- riencing an increase in the demand for our services and assistance. I do not envy the job of our city commissioners in having to allocate funds to address the needs of so many worthwhile non-profits in our community. Whether they are social service related or not, they all add to the quality of life we have come to enjoy here in beautiful Fernandina. I simply i,...-i.. ,i il. i l,.... .thathave planned carefully should not be pun- ished for their good judgment. Sound business decisions have allowed us to make every donated dollar count that much more. Grants are leveraged with local support. Micah's Place is able to turn our general donations into approxi- mately three times the original amount by using contributions as required match for other funding opportunities. Local support is looked upon favorably by those foun- dations and grantors with whom we seek a partnership. On behalf of the women and chil- JEFF PARKER/FLORIDA TODAY dren Micah's Place serves I would like to extend my thanks to the board of directors for the wisdom they have exhibited in handling their fiduciary responsibilities, to the staff for doing so much with so little and to our incredible community that has supported Micah's Place in our vision to end domestic violence one relationship at a time. In the book by Charles Dickens Oliver Twist, there is a line where young Oliver asks, "Please sir, I want some more porridge." Denied. The same is now taking place in Fernandina Beach. The punishment of the children of the citizens of this community - just so a few in city government may live the high life at taxpayer expense. The city manager has come up with a grand idea! Charge the par- ents of the children to use public sporting facilities, etc., that the tax- payers of Fernandina already pay to use. This is clearly unjustified and a manifest abuse of double taxation. Are you as a taxpayer aware that a large number of city employees (non-essential - as I am not referring to the police or fire department) are actually using city-owned vehicles to drive home and to the grocery store or just run personal errands in general. This adds up to thousands of dollars in fuel and insurance costs every year. New cars, too. In this economy? Huh? Does your compa- ny pay for your gas and insurance and car for personal business? Now I have also learned that all city employees can play almost free ($5) at the city golf course. Why? When the place is tanking finan- cially. The city manager punishes the city with these cockamamie ideas on how to pay for what we have already been taxed. And the Snopes Family, aka the Fernandina Beach City Commission, is a suck- er for every boondoggle Mr. Cyzmbor thinks up. Remember, he did come from Michigan and they have a 14 percent unemployment rate. So this tax and spend thing is old hat to him. because of Mr. Cyzmbor's dubious intentions. I suggest the following: That no one employed by the city of Fernandina be allowed to take city- owned vehicles home and especial- ly not be permitted to use them for personal business (this would not apply to emergency first responder personnel, police/fire/city manager - and only these three). And that all employees of the city of Fernandina Beach be charged the full ride to play the city golf course. The city of Fernandina Beach can no longer afford the luxury of incompetence. Today the Nassau Board of County Commissioners announced a fall party to be held on Sept. 22 beginning at 5:18 p.m. This is the exact date and time for the Autumnal Equinox, which has been celebrated for thousands of years by Pagan reli- gions. This will be part of the new BOCC strategy to celebrate free- dom of religion so that they will not have to give up their Christian prayers at every BOCC meeting. The Equinox celebration will be held at the BOCC Stonehenge mon- ument located just to the west of the Shave Bridge to Amelia Island and on the south side of ALA. The next time you drive onto the island just look south for the concrete stone pillars. You can't miss it. A special witch will be brought in who has promised to bring her largest cauldron and utilize parts of manatee, osprey, wood stork and otter to brew a potion that allows all participants to loosen up for the main show. As the sun sets over the concrete pillars and darkness falls, the BOCC will lead a procession into the center of our Stonehenge. At the center of the circle will be a great bonfire burning logs from several 300-year- old ancient live oak trees. The BOCC will then start a chant of "No Tree Ordinance, No Tree Ordinan- ce;" this will summon the spirits of random development to bless the ceremony. Next each BOCC member will throw a copy of the impact fee ordi- nance into the blazing fire. The development spirit will laugh with delight. As the ceremony continues, the BOCC will sacrifice a virgin wet- land and spread fill dirt around the circle. The chair of the BOCC will then dip a golden cup into the great bowl of contaminated water and dump the cup into the adjoining marsh. The Peace of Palin will then set- tle upon the crowd and guide them to the next town hall meeting on health care. Contact the county attorney for further legally suspect information. I recently became aware that our city of Fernandina council members have passed a noise ordinance for downtown Centre Street and the surrounding areas in regards to live music and to include any noises cre- ated by the new and existing busi- nesses after 10 p.m. These same actions that were brought in to begin a stimulation to our local economy during stressful and hard times are in fact being punished at this time. Making noises above a certain level or playing live music after 10 p.m. would in fact now become a violation punishable by fines and more. Personally, I feel that this was a ridiculous and irrational act which will ultimately punish the local busi- nesses, and shall deter new compa- nies from seeking out this as a stim- ulating location to house their new establishments or new and invigor- ating ways to obtain new business. (Please note that most adults go out to enjoy each other's company after dinner around 9 p.m., thus this would fall into the violation time frame if one should like to stay and enjoy music.) I also believe that most people, like myself, considering to visit a city, and should I be wanting to enjoy the nightlife or not, prior to securing my accommodations or bed and breakfast reservations, I would have done a bit of investigation prior to my visit to the said area. Thus elim- inating the need for complaints dur- ing my visit due to loud noises or anything of any other nature. After all is said and done, I believe that this new ordinance shall in fact hurt our local business economy and bring down the great efforts that have been done to stimulate the city of Fernandina Beach's downtown com- "Sick of Obama day," Sept. 8. I have just recently learned of Obama's plan to indoctrinate and progress his ideals upon our school children Sept. 8. I am guessing his agenda will be to shove this health care issue and further split them- selves from the principles most par- ents try to instill upon their children at impressionable ages. My children will not be subjected to this indoc- trination as I will not allow them to attend school on this day if Nassau County allows this to happen. If you are a concerned parent, you should be very concerned about this exam- ple of our political leadership. Fidel Castro should be very proud of America now. Follow what your heart and mind tell you. Don Shelton I hope I get a chance to get anoth- er letter for the response to my let- ter "Obama is scary." Really, just how much of our country has to be destroyed by such radicals/socialist czars? Really, look at all his czars, they have more influ- ence than his cabinet? How many of these czars are checked out. Did you know that if it were not for the fact that Obama is president, he could not get a top-secret clearance. I know something about that, having served in the Air Force for 23 years; I still had a top secret when I retired. So when these people wanted change, by God, they are getting it. But getting back to my response, Obama clearly stated, "We cannot continue to rely only on our mili- tary in order to achieve the nation- al security objectives that we've set. We've got to have a civilian national security force that's just as powerful, just as strong, just as well-funded." When has the Peace Corps had weapons? Or is he talking about the thugs that beat up protesters at a town hall meeting? Obama is not changing the United States for the better. Pretty soon I see an attack on our First Amendment. I hear his speech on cap and trade, I am not taking this out of context, he said gas prices, electric bills are going to skyrocket. I hope you can afford the hike in gas prices/electric bills. I would like to see just how far the czars and Obama change the USA. Talk about the last eight years, well, one thing you better remem- ber, President Bush kept us safe after the attack that killed 3,000 Americans. Oh yeah, you going to say that President Bush could have stopped 9/11? If it had been taken care of when Osama bin laden was offered to the United States, but then President Clinton did not want Osama bin Laden. So who could have stopped 9/11? My wife recently brought out some letters handwritten 15 years ago by our now 29-year-old grand- daughter, and a mother, Jennifer. We lived many miles apart, and this was before e-mail and texting. These letters contained hand- drawn and colored pictures of our home far away, and colored draw- ings of flowers, and humorous asides, and very candid comments about her life and preparations for high school. She also sent us recorded tape cassettes of her play- ing the saxophone, as she prepared for the coming band season. From our grandchildren's early childhood we were known as Memere and Pepere, but by mid- dle school we were called a more "cool" Mem and Pep. In her letters, Jennifer addresses me in an even more "cool" manner, "How's the Pepster doing?" We recently gave these letters to Jennifer and she thought they were "just so funny." Now I wonder? When Jennifer gets e-mail or text messages from her granddaughter, will they be kept and cherished as much as these handwritten letters have been to us and Jennifer? Ushers celebrate at Harper Chapel Quitting is not an option for us as believers. Of course, we are tired. The journey has been long and hard. However, God has never expected us to perform in our own strength, though He does expect us to endure to the end. He will never ask us to run a course He has commanded without providing us the grace to accomplish the task. The Usher Board of Harper Chapel Baptist Church, under the leadership of their new pastor, the Rev. C. Denson, and very anointed First Lady, Evangelist Denson, celebrated another anniversary with their true theme of Workers in the House of God. They were first organized in the early '60s under the leadership of the Rev. E.L. Anderson. Many of their mem- bers moved away, then reorganized in the '80s under the Rev. D. Blue. Sis. Minnie L. Cowart served as president until the early '90s. Then, the Rev. Gary Anderson became pastor. Under his leadership, there was only one serving on the board, Sis. Katherine Kimble. She continued to serve. The Rev. John Ewing became their pastor in 2001. Again, it was recognized and officers were elected. They were Sis. Verleen Monroe, president; Sis. Katherine Simmons (deceased), treasurer; and Sis. Lillie Johnson, chaplain. Members were Sis. Janie Edward and Sis. Louvenia Simon. THEN it was good to have had Sis. Katherine Kimble Maybelle to come back to help Kirkland the ushers celebrate Members from area churches were available to join in the celebration. Sis. Thelma Albertie, Sis. Gracie White, Min. Leonard Albert, Sis. Rubye Brown, Sis. A. Mitchell and Sis. E White and Evangelist Clara Stamps brought the message from God. She said, "Don't give up." There are often stumbling blocks in our way. We're living in a time when we don't love; don't have time to help anyone anymore. We're dressed up but we're messed up. No matter what men do, always remember: God is not broke and Heaven is not in recession. As we lifted up our hearts in celebra- tion to God, giving Him the praise, we'll never forget what He's done for us, because oh, I want to see him, look upon his face but we must stay under the blood to be at the meeting when all the saints get home. Just thinking of the goodness of Jesus and all he's done for us, we contin- ue to bless his name, giving him the glory, honor and praise because we've come a long way. For a day in thy court is better than a thousand. I had rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than to dwell in the tents of wickedness. We'll plan to be on hand next year for another celebration. The family of the late Rev. Lathern Jones, Kenneth Dennison and Owens Scott thank you for all acts of kindness shown to them during their hours of bereavement. They ask that you contin- ue to remember them in prayer. Their prayer is that God continue to bless you, their family and friends. Dericka Benson, along with her mother, Maybelle Kirkland Brown, took advan- tage of the last week before returning to school, spending a week in Freeport, Bahamas. A great time together was enjoyed. Birthday wishes to Nikita Geter, Stacy Rhinehart, Yvette Bacon, Lazell Bostic, Curtis Collins, Rev. Jutson, Duval, Reginald Alexander, David Johns, Sierria Henry, Florenda Jones, Willie Scott, Shalene Raysor, Rozanda Thomas, Ardee Harris, Shamika Alberta, Deena Raysor and Sis. Mae D. Flagler. One of the prime requirements for any successfulbusiness are satisfied customers. Those in thebusiness world are keenly aware .- that a satisfiedcustomer will most likely return to them in thefuture, and that they will recommend theirproducts and services to others. To be a satisfiedsatisfied customer, we need to be treated fairlyand honestly, and in a civilized manner; we do notlike being taken advantage of, cheated or ridiculed in any way. Likewise, on a personal level, we should also strive to have satisfied customers. Everyone we come in contact with is A somewhat of a customer and we should be <-" selling our friendship,goodwill andcheerfulness. -- The Bible tells us to treat others as we want them to treat us, and when dealing with others this "Golden Rule" is necessary for us to have and keep enjoyable relationships. Dissension in one's family, or in the workplace, or withanyone we deal with, is contrary to the way our Lord wants us to live our lives. And although it is not always easy to reflect God's goodwill to others, when we are cordial to others, we receive enjoyment and we are blessed by extending God's love. sacrificed on that day and those who continue with their service to our communities every day, and renewal of our commitment to freedom and the values of our country. Members of law enforce- ment, fire, EMS, active and veteran military, service guests of the community are invited to stand and walk together as a display of pride in our nation. aged to congregate at the gazebo in Central Park from 5- 5:30 p.m. on Friday, Sept. 11. The Freedom Walk will commence at 5:30 p.m., trav- eling west along the side- walks of Atlantic Avenue and Centre Street, ending at the veteran's monument at the

Beetle Bailey

Standing for “the Memphis Group”, the M.G.’s back up what R&B singing legend?

BBeM: Item List Item List                       1 member comment Trivia questions After the Lone Ranger saved the day and rode off into the sunset, the grateful citizens would ask, "Who was that masked man?" Invariably, someone would answer, "I don't know, but he left this behind." What did he leave behind? When The Beatles first came to the U.S. in early 1964, we all watched them on ... Get your kicks ... The story you are about to see is true. Only the names have been changed ... In the jungle, the mighty jungle ... Abbott told Costello that the St. Louis baseball team's lineup consisted of: "N-E-S-T-L-E-S, Nestle's makes the very best ... __." The great jazz trumpeter known as "Satchmo" was America's "Ambassador of Goodwill." His real name was ... What "takes a licking and keeps on ticking" ? Red Skelton's hobo character was named ... Some Americans who protested U.S. involvement in the Vietnam War did so by burning their __ The cute little car with the engine in the back and the trunk in the front was called the VW. What other name did it go by? In 1971, singer Don MacLean recorded a song about, "the day the music died." This was a tribute to ... In 1957, the Soviet Union took an early lead in the space race by placing the first man-made satellite into orbit. It was called ... One of the big fads of the late '50s and early '60s was a large plastic ring that we twirled around our waist. It was called the ... What "builds strong bodies 12 ways" ? Before he was Muhammad Ali, he was ... Pogo, the comic strip character, said, "We have met the enemy and ..." Good night, David ... Before portraying the Skipper's Little Buddy on Gilligan's Island, Bob Denver was Dobie Gillis' friend ... Liar, liar ... Meanwhile, back in Metropolis, Superman fights a never-ending battle for truth, justice, and ... Hey kids, what time is it? Lions and tigers and bears ... "Never trust anyone ... " The NFL quarterback who appeared in a television commercial wearing women's pantyhose was ... Brylcreem ... Before Cathy Rigby and Robin Williams, Peter Pan was played by ... Can you identify The Beatles and indicate which instrument each of them played? I wonder, wonder ... who, ... I'm strong to the finish ... When it's least expected, you're elected, you're the star today ... What do M&M's do? Hey there! Hi there! Ho there! ... Smokey Bear warned: Call Roto-Rooter, that's the name ... In the valley of the jolly ... Does she, or doesn't she? See the U.S.A ... What did L.S.M.F.T. mean on the side of a cigarette pack? Us Tareyton smokers would rather ... I'd __ for a Camel. Schaefer is the one beer to have ... Can you identify the person in this photo? You'll wonder where the yellow went ... Nothin' says lovin' like (what?) and (who?) says it best Silly rabbit ... Many people know this impossible object as a blivet. What did Mad magazine call it? Go Greyhound, and ... You're soaking in it. (What is "It"?) The following program is brought to you in living color ... Come to where the flavor is. Come to ... After the Twist, the Mashed Potato, and the Watusi, we "danced" under a stick that was lowered as low as we could go, in a dance called the ... There's always room for ... Many cars of the '50s sported protuberances on the front bumpers. These were known as ... Bill Dana often appeared on The Ed Sullivan Show as a character named ... Jim Nabors is best known for his character, Gomer Pyle. What other surprising talent does/did he have? (As the woman in the commercial opened a refrigerator): You can be sure ... Ford has ... Wouldn't you really rather have ... ? Bob Keeshan was TV's Captain Kangaroo. What other character did he portray? Oh, Magoo ... The Rocky and His Friends cartoons featured the WABAC machine, used to travel back in time. Who did this time traveling? It's not nice to fool ... Whose advertising slogan was: "Ask the man who owns one" ? Who claimed to be "the most trusted name in electronics" ? Burkina Faso ... At Zenith ... Texas used to be the biggest state in the U.S., and there were plenty of jokes based on that fact. These became virtually extinct when Alaska became the 49th, and largest, state. When did that occur? What did "3M" mean? What was Beaver Cleaver's given name? On The Flintstones, what was Wilma's maiden name? "I like ..." Which product came with "sponge end papers" ? Whose advertising jingle included the phrase, "where the rubber meets the road" ? Which of the following was NOT one of the "Chicago Seven" (or "Conspiracy Seven") defendants? What did S.W.A.K. stand for? In a recurring feature on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson, "Carnac the Magnificent" would ("in his borderline mystical way") divine the questions and answers in envelopes that had been ... What product included "non-skid safety discs" ? Is it live, or is it ... ? What impish supervillain tormented Superman in DC comics and had to be tricked into returning to his 5th-dimension home? Sometimes you feel like a nut ... Who got married on The Tonight Show in December, 1969? Oh boy, Laddie Boy! ... Which of these was NOT a phrase often heard on Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In ? Who (or what) was Rin Tin Tin ? On The Addams Family TV series, what was the name of the severed hand? Who put a tiger in your tank? Many of Phyllis Diller's jokes revolved around her husband, ... Ernie Kovacs once did a cigarette commercial while ... Comedian Vaughn Meader was known mostly (some might say only) for his impression of ... Nobody doesn't like ... In 1957, how much did it cost to mail a 1-ounce first-class letter? When did the New York Mets begin play in the National League? Jim Backus is perhaps best known for his portrayal of Thurston Howell, III on Gilligan's Island. However, he also supplied the voice for a cartoon character. Which one? Which one of these cartoon characters was NOT voiced by Mel Blanc? Sid Caesar was one of early television's biggest stars, with Your Show of Shows and Caesar's Hour. Which of the following did NOT write for either of these programs? What was "good to the last drop" ? When did Disneyland first open in Anaheim, CA ? What was "99 and 44/100% pure" ? Marilyn Chambers was the "Ivory soap girl" on the Ivory Snow box, but later became famous as ... Where have all the flowers gone? In 1958, The Playmates had a #4 novelty hit with a rising-tempo song about a race between a Nash and a Cadillac. What was it called? What product was withdrawn from the market in 1976 due to health concerns, only to return in 1987? In 1969, Sly and the Family Stone had a hit single titled ... In the '60s, most Americans did NOT own ... Who played the title role in most episodes of The Lone Ranger on TV? Who was the first host of NBC's Tonight Show ? Who, in 1954, was the first to run a mile in less than four minutes? Rooms at Motel 6 once cost $6 a night. Which of the following was NOT one of the U.S.'s original Mercury Seven astronauts? In a recurring office skit on The Carol Burnett Show, Tim Conway played Mr. Tudball and Burnett played his secretary. What was the secretary's name? Jerry Mathers, of Leave It to Beaver  fame, was killed in the Vietnam War. Babe Ruth hit 60 home runs in 1927. Who finally broke that record in 1961? Which of these was NOT part of the British musical invasion of the mid-'60s? In 1965, country artist Roger Miller had a big crossover hit with a song titled ... Who was Lyndon Johnson's running mate in the 1964 Presidential election? Harold Stassen had a claim to fame as ... Who played Little Ricky on the final season of I Love Lucy ? On The Honeymooners, where did Ralph frequently offer to send his wife? Which of these was NOT an American network TV game/quiz show in the '50s ? What's the real name of The Beatles' drummer? Herman's Hermits had several hit songs during the '60s, including Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Daughter and I'm Henry the Eighth, I Am. What was the real name of the group's lead vocalist? Which of the following films was NOT directed by Alfred Hitchcock? Which of these actors was NOT in 1959's Some Like It Hot ? According to the commercials, what was "Indescribably delicious" ? Congress banned cigarette advertising on TV and radio as of ... On I Love Lucy, what was Lucy Ricardo's maiden name? According to the Car 54, Where Are You? theme song, who was "due at Idlewild" ? In the 1958 hit, The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late), what did Alvin want for Christmas? Before playing Detective Steve McGarrett on Hawaii Five-O, Jack Lord starred as ... On ABC's That Girl (the first series about a single working girl who was not a domestic servant), Marlo Thomas played a character named ... On TV's Get Smart, Don Adams played Maxwell Smart, Agent ... When sharing sensitive information with the Chief, the agents of TV's Get Smart attempted to use ... In 1963, Craig Breedlove's racer "Spirit of America" broke the land speed record at Bonneville Salt Flats, Utah. How fast did he go? In the '50s, a dollar bill could be exchanged for silver bullion. Was there ever a broadcast TV channel 1 in the U.S.? Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Mayer wiener, That is what I'd truly like to be. 'Cause if I were an Oscar Mayer wiener ... Comet cleanser's TV commercials featured ... In TV commercials, Charlie the Tuna tried to show he had good taste, but the sponsor was looking for tunas that taste good. Which brand of tuna was this? Plop, plop, fizz, fizz ... How high did baseball players' salaries get in the '60s, and who was the highest-paid player of that decade? What did Walter Cronkite say at the end of each CBS Evening News broadcast that he anchored? Which of the following labels was NOT likely to be found on (or inside) the typical AM table radio of the '50s? Some Baby Boomer proto-nerds built electronic kits offered by Allied Radio, Lafayette Radio Electronics, Heath Co., and others. Which of the following kits would you find in a Heathkit catalog from the '60s? (Select all that apply, if any.) What was the name of the charter boat that was thrown off course by a storm on TV's Gilligan's Island ? Who directed the 1968 film, 2001: A Space Odyssey ? Who wrote the 1951 novel, The Catcher in the Rye ? What is the title of this 1962 work by Andy Warhol? The equine cartoon character Quick Draw McGraw sometimes assumed the identity of a Zorro-like masked vigilante known as ... In 1960, some movie theaters were equipped with a system, dubbed "Smell-O-Vision", that delivered various odors to the audience seats when cued by the film. Playboy magazine's very first issue (1953) featured Marilyn Monroe. In 1964, trumpeter Al Hirt had a hit single titled ... Lorne Greene, the Canadian actor best known for his role as Ben Cartwright on NBC's Bonanza, had a hit single (spoken, rather than sung) in 1964. It was titled ... David Seville was the stage name of the artist behind the 1958 hit records, Witch Doctor and The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late). What was his real name? Before portraying Mr. Waverly on TV's The Man From U.N.C.L.E., Leo G. Carroll starred as ... On NBC's The Man From U.N.C.L.E., the enemy organization was named ...  (Select all that apply, if any.) Who sang beautifully, but stuttered when speaking?  (Select all that apply, if any.) Which of the following sentences would you be most likely to find in a "Dick and Jane" reader? Those formerly-ubiquitous 33-1/3 rpm records were known as LPs. What did LP stand for? For what newspaper did Clark Kent work? What was the name of the Cartwrights' ranch on Bonanza? Many Buicks of the '50s sported portholes or "Ventiports" on the front fenders. What practical function did these serve? (Select all that apply, if any.) Blue Suede Shoes was a #1 hit in 1956. Who wrote and first recorded it? In a 1960s series of short radio dramas, a shoe salesman spent his weekends "striking terror into the hearts of criminals everywhere" as the winged warrior, Chickenman. What was his secret identity? "Professor Plum, in the library, with the candlestick" is something you might say while playing ... On which car would you find this '60s hood emblem? Ding dong ... What musical instrument was used to produce the eerie sound effects in many science-fiction movies of the '50s? The tribe of Indians living near Fort Courage on TV's F Troop were the ... Ray Bradbury's 1953 novel, Fahrenheit 451, was adapted for the big screen in 1966. To what does the title refer? The Joey Bishop Show sitcom has the distinction of being the only TV show ... Who was the first human in space? Prior to becoming a politician and, eventually, U.S. President, Ronald Reagan was a radio and film actor, starring in one of these movies. Which one? One of these events occurred on November 9, 1965. Which one? On TV's Mission: Impossible, if Mr. Briggs (or Mr. Phelps) or any of his agents were caught or killed, what would the Secretary do? Which make of car is most associated with James Bond 007? The U.S. launched the world's first nuclear-powered submarine in 1954. What was its name? Bob & Carol ... According to the 1957-58 hit record by Danny & the Juniors, what could you do At the Hop? What Oscar winner made his first film appearance as the reclusive "Boo" Radley in 1962's To Kill a Mockingbird ? You can trust your car to the man ... During the '60s, who was often cited as "the most trusted man in America" ? Who starred in the original 1955 Broadway production of Damn Yankees ? Who starred in the original 1959 Broadway production of The Sound of Music ? In the '50s and '60s, the nation of Sri Lanka was known as ... "Coup-Fourré!"is something you might call out when playing ... When playing Monopoly, how much rent would you be charged if you landed on Boardwalk with a hotel on it? In the '50s and '60s, Western Union offered singing telegram service. Dr. Timothy Leary was a leading proponent of the therapeutic benefits of ... Remember TV's Hogan's Heroes? Which of the following statements about its cast is true? (Select all that apply, if any.) Which of these automotive components, common in cars of the '50s and '60s, is absent from today's models? Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev famously warned:  (Select all that apply, if any.) The operatic coloratura soprano hailed as La Stupenda in the '60s was ... In a landmark 1973 ruling, the U.S. Supreme Court ... Johnny Cash recorded A Boy Named Sue at San Quentin State Prison in 1969. The song reached #2 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart. Who wrote it? Two of the following actors are siblings. Which ones? Which of these '60s musical groups did NOT feature guitarist Eric Clapton? In 1971, George Harrison and Ravi Shankar organized two star-studded benefit concerts at Madison Square Garden in order to support ... Which of the following did NOT serve as U.S. Secretary of State during the '50s-'70s ? Who was Nikita Khrushchev's immediate successor as General Secretary of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union? In 1962, Booker T. and the MGs had an instrumental hit titled ... Before the pocket calculator, math students and engineers relied on the slide rule for quick, fairly-precise calculations. Which of the following could NOT be computed (in one operation) using a slide rule? The Bay of Pigs was the location of an international incident in 1961. Where is it? In July, 1969, Massachusetts Senator Edward "Ted" Kennedy's career was nearly derailed. Why? The song Dominique reached #1 on the U.S. pop charts in December, 1963. Who recorded it? A performer known as Napoleon XIV had a hit novelty record in 1966 titled ... "Great Caesar's ghost!"was a catch-phrase often uttered by what fictional character? If your TV picture looked like this, what knob did you need to adjust to get a proper picture? The 1975 film, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, starred Jack Nicholson and won five Academy Awards. Who wrote the 1962 novel on which it was based? In 1964, author Ken Kesey and friends took an infamous hallucinogen-fueled trip across the country in a psychedelic school bus. What did the group call itself? Jurassic Park author Michael Crichton wrote several other novels, including one of these. Which one? What is the title of this 1966 work by artist Barnett Newman? Who was the star of TV's Andy's Gang ? "Holy mackerel!"was a catch-phrase often uttered by what fictional character? Which cartoon character often exclaimed (with a lisp), "Sufferin' succotash!" ? Who was Director of the FBI between 1963 and 1970? Who left his heart in San Francisco? When and where was the first Super Bowl played? Before he was Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, he was ... Who was baseball's "Say Hey Kid" ? Who competed in the women's U.S. Open tennis tournament after previously competing in the men's division? "It's a Small World" is a popular attraction at several Disney theme parks, but it got its start at the 1964 World's Fair in New York. Whose pavilion was it? Arthur Murray's name was ...  (Select all that apply, if any.) Who hosted a fitness TV program starting in 1951? Jack Ruby became famous ... Who starred (and sang) in the 1969 film, Paint Your Wagon ? What was the name of the dog on The Jetsons ? Robert Zimmerman ... Tenzing Norgay ... According to the Mister Ed theme song, what will happen if you ask Mister Ed a question? Lethal injection, the electric chair, firing squads, and hanging have been used, from time to time, to execute those convicted of capital offenses. When was the last time such a person was legally executed by hanging in the U.S.? What was First Lady Jackie Kennedy's maiden name? I can't believe ... One of the following agencies of departments of the U.S. government ceased to exist in 1971. Which one? What was CONELRAD? Payola ... Who played three different roles (Duchess Gloriana XII; Prime Minister Count Rupert Mountjoy; and military leader Tully Bascomb) in the 1959 film, The Mouse That Roared ? Who was the main sponsor of Milton "Mr. Television" Berle's comedy-variety show on NBC-TV in the early-to-mid '50s? Whose advertising claimed that their product was "shot from guns" ? What did consumers find in some boxes of Quaker Puffed Rice and Puffed Wheat cereals in 1955? One of the following musicians is/was NOT blind. Which one? Ventriloquist-puppeteer Shari Lewis' best-known puppet was Lamb Chop. Which one of these was another of Lewis' puppets? The Frisbee flying disc had several earlier names, including one of these. Which one? One of these products used Carly Simon's 1971 song, Anticipation, in its TV commercials. Which one? Who offered "57 varieties" ? The '50s-'60s was a period of rapid advances in air travel, including the transition to jet airliners. What (other than propellers) was common in that era, but no longer found in today's large airliners? In 1978, one of the following became a national holiday in the U.S. Which one? Rush to Judgment, a book by Mark Lane, was one of the first investigations of ... What did SNCC stand for? What recreation innovation did Huffy introduce in 1955? "Magic Fingers" was ... For many years, there were three commercial broadcast TV networks; ABC, CBS, and NBC. But in the mid '40s to mid '50s, there were other competing networks, including which one of these? What did the C in CBS stand for? In the long history of Major League Baseball, there has been only one perfect game* during a World Series. Who pitched it, and when? * not just a shut-out or no-hitter, but a game (minimum 9 innings) in which no players from the losing team reach base for any reason (base hit, walk, fielding error, hit batsman) Where did Yogi Bear live? In the 1960s, who established a waiting list for future commercial flights to the moon? In the '60s, the ads for one of these products suggested that we should use it because the NASA astronauts used it in space. Which product was it? Whose Secret Squadron members were issued secret decoders? Nowadays, an "e-ticket" is an electronic ticket you might receive if you make travel arrangements online. What would an "E Ticket" get you in 1966? In the '50s-'60s, how many channels were indicated on the typical American television set's built-in tuner? Whenever Felix the Cat got in a fix, what would he do? Which one of these stories was NOT written by Dr. Seuss? Which one of the following names does not belong with the others? In the 1974 film, The Godfather Part II, Corleone was not the real surname of the young Vito. What was his real name? Who wrote the 1970 best-seller, Jonathan Livingston Seagull ? R. Crumb ... On what program did the catch-phrase, "Just the facts, ma'am," originate? Which classic car featured round "porthole" rear side windows? In 1966, Woody Allen took an existing Japanese spy thriller, dubbed in comedic English dialogue, and released it as... Who was the commercial spokesperson for Westinghouse appliances? Which of these is an actual town named after a radio or TV game show? During the 1970s, who warned, "Don't leave home without them," in the commercials for American Express travelers cheques? One of the regulars on The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour ran for U.S. President. Who was it? Who had the only speaking part in Mel Brooks' 1976 film, Silent Movie ? Of the 30 companies that were in the Dow Jones Industrial Average in 1958, how many remain there today* (allowing for companies whose names have changed)? * December, 2012 Who regularly exclaimed, "And awaaay we go!" ? Match these comedic characters with the entertainers who portrayed them. The Berlin Wall separated East and West Berlin during the Cold War. When was it constructed? The first film based on Ian Fleming's James Bond novels was released in 1962. What was its title? "Checkpoint Charlie" was ... During the Cold War, a metaphoric barrier stood between the East and West. What was it called? Since the '50s and '60s, many countries have undergone identity crises. Match each of these current nations with its former name. Where was JFK's presidential retreat? U.S. presidents often entertain guests and conduct meetings at Camp David. For whom (or what) was this facility named? Match each company or product with its logo. Match each animal with the appropriate TV show. Match these Top 100 hits of 1970 with their musical artists. What was special about ABC-TV's Turn-On series from 1969? What was the name of Sky King's Cessna? The title song for the James Bond 007 film, Goldfinger, was a Top 10 hit in the U.S. Who performed it? Complete this line from The Firesign Theatre's 1968 debut album, Waiting for the Electrician or Someone Like Him: "Follow in your book and repeat after me, as we learn three new words in ..." In a recurring comedic bit on The Tonight Show, host Johnny Carson delivered "editorial replies" as a redneck wearing a plaid hunting jacket and hat. This character was named . . . One of the following was NOT a member of the Monty Python comedy troupe. Which one? Which of these symbols was displayed on the Soviet Union's flag? Hot Diggity (Dog Ziggity Boom)  was a #2 hit song in the U.S. in 1956. Who performed it? In the '50s, one of these was a popular hairstyle. Which one? "Let __ put you in the driver's seat." Whose advertising slogan was, "When you care enough to send the very best" ? What was touted as being "stronger than dirt" ? Complete this advertising slogan: "Promise her anything, but give her ..." In TV commercials, who suggested that you should, "Have it your way" ? Who promoted a bodybuilding program for the "97-pound weakling" ? Who used the advertising slogan, "Look, Mom, no cavities!" ? Complete this advertising slogan: "All my men wear ___, or they wear nothing at all." "Betcha can't eat just one"dared one advertiser. Which one? Whose ads used a sexy model to ask, suggestively, "Why don't you pick me up and smoke me sometime?" Can you match these cities with the years they hosted the Summer Olympic games? In the  Beany and Cecil  cartoon series, what sort of creature was Cecil? Which comic strip features a character named Skeezix? Only one of the following was NOT an amateur ("ham") radio operator. Which one? What was L'il Abner's surname? In 1966, Australian pop music group The Seekers had their biggest U.S. hit, Georgy Girl. In what film was this song featured? Richard Harris had a big hit in 1968 with the first recording of a song that included the lyrics: Someone left the cake out in the rain I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it And I'll never have that recipe again What is the title of this song? Hemo the Magnificent  was ... The TV spy series with Patrick McGoohan was a British import. Here in the States, it was called Secret Agent. What was its original British title? Who were the stars of TV's I'm Dickens, He's Fenster? (Select two.) When mild-mannered Don Diego de la Vega donned his mask, he became the legendary swordsman, Zorro. Who portrayed him in the 1957 series on ABC-TV? On the '50s TV western, The Adventures of Wild Bill Hickok, who played Wild Bill's sidekick, Jingles P. Jones? Which brand of cigarettes came with a coupon on each pack, which smokers could collect and redeem for "valuable gifts" ? We invited many TV families into our homes, growing to know them on a first-name basis. Can you match these TV husbands with their wives? American Motors Corporation (AMC) produced several successful car models in the '70s, including which one of these? What was the name of the U.S. agency that preceded the Nuclear Regulatory Commission? The F.W. Woolworth Company had a nationwide chain of five-and-dime stores, but as that business declined, the company changed its focus and its name, becoming ... Publication of the "Pentagon Papers" may have helped hasten the end of the Vietnam War. Who leaked these top-secret papers to the media in 1971? What is Star Trek Captain James T. Kirk's middle name? What prominent golfer was known for wearing a straw hat and playing barefoot? What was the U.S. President's annual salary during the '50s and '60s (1949-1969, to be precise)? Who was the first African-American to be appointed to the U.S. Supreme Court? Can you match these groovy songs from the '60s-'70s with their recording artists? Which one of the following was NOT a recurring villain on ABC-TV's Batman series in the '60s? What singer is known as The Queen of Soul? Which baseball player was known as "Hammer" ? Can you spot the celebrity whose birth name was Marvin Lee Aday? Can you spot the person whose birth name was Leslie Hornby? Actor James Dean starred in only three films before his death in 1955. How did he die? Which one of these was NOT a successful '60s psychedelic rock band? The written political principles at the heart of Students for a Democratic Society (1960-69) were known as the ... Which school is most closely associated with the Free Speech Movement of 1964-65? In 1969, a faction of Students for a Democratic Society (SDS) broke off and formed a radical-left organization promoting the violent overthrow of the U.S. government. Informally, this group was called the ... In 1974, newspaper heiress Patty Hearst was kidnapped by a militant left-wing group which also committed bank robberies and murders. What was the name of this group? In a 1970 film, Godfrey Cambridge played a white bigot who wakes up one morning to discover that he has turned black. What was the film's title? Which comic strip featured a character named Sluggo? Who emceed the Miss America pageant from 1955-79? The term "military-industrial complex" refers to the way industry, the military, and politics exert influence on one another, at the same time feeding and being fed by war. Who coined this phrase? Which of the following were regulars on Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In? (Select all that apply, if any.) Author Truman Capote made a rare acting appearance in the 1976 film, Murder by Death. What was the name of the character he portrayed? Which one of these did NOT perform at the Woodstock Festival in August, 1969? Many fine musicians' lives and careers ended unexpectedly. How did each of these performers die? First Lady Jackie Kennedy was a fashion trendsetter. Which one of these items became de rigueur due, in large part, to her use of it? Who took American television viewers on a tour of the White House in 1962? Can you complete this advertising slogan? "When ___ talks, people listen." Where did the phrase, "Klaatu barada nikto," originate? Which TWO of the following starred in NBC-TV's mid-'60s series, I Spy ? (Select two.) On The Jetsons animated TV series, what was George Jetson's work week like? Which one of these TV series was NOT set mostly in or near New York City? On I Love Lucy, the apartment building where the Ricardos and Mertzes lived was located at 623 E. 68th Street in New York City. What is at that address today? Back in the '50s, many parents wouldn't let their children go to public swimming pools. This changed after the introduction of ... What role(s) did Patty Duke play on The Patty Duke Show? Which TWO of the following starred in the 1959 Broadway play (and 1962 feature film), The Miracle Worker ? (Select two.) Who was the first host/anchor of NBC-TV's Today show? Actor Larry Kert played the lead male role, Tony, in the original 1957 Broadway production of West Side Story. Who played the lead female roles, Maria and Anita? (Select two of the choices.) Who played Dennis in the 1959 TV series, Dennis the Menace? In Hank Ketcham's comic strip, what is Dennis the Menace's surname? Why are most pop songs about 3 minutes long? Several new teams joined Major League Baseball during the '60s. Which was the first of these expansion (not simply relocated) teams to win a World Series? On April 9, 1965, Judy Garland and The Supremes performed at the gala opening night of ... There are now several domed sports stadiums in the U.S. Which was the first? In TV commercials, what product cured the dreaded "ring around the collar" ? Many distinctive trademarks and brand names have, through common usage, become genericized. Which one of these generic terms had NOT been a U.S. trademark? Which comedian was known as the King of the One-Liners, including the classic, "Take my wife -- please!" ? In 1962, the University of Mississippi admitted its first African-American student, sparking riots on campus. Who was the student? Where is the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame? Who composed the theme music for the 1964 film, The Pink Panther ? What did Bobby Seale and Huey P. Newton establish in 1966? Can you match these real-life husbands and wives? The Vietnam War protest song, Draft Dodger Rag, included the lyrics: Sarge, I'm only eighteen, I got a ruptured spleen And I always carry a purse I got eyes like a bat, and my feet are flat And my asthma's getting worse Who wrote it? According to a '50s TV theme song, who was King of the Wild Frontier? Many remember The Skipper on Gilligan's Island, but few recall this fictional character's full name. Do you? Alan Hale, Jr. is best known as the Skipper on TV's Gilligan's Island, but he played the title role on a previous show. Which one? Whose signature song was Back in the Saddle Again ? Whose signature tune was Thanks for the Memory ? What TV program used Funeral March of a Marionette, by Charles Gounod, as its theme music? A signature aspect of TV's Jeopardy! game show is the musical interlude during Final Jeopardy, while the contestants consider their answer-question and wager. Who wrote this music? Who was the original leader of the NBC orchestra on The Tonight Show? Who hosted New Year's Eve celebrations on radio and TV from 1929 to 1976, introducing America to Auld Lang Syne as a traditional song for the occasion? In 1951, a DJ known as "Moondog" introduced the term "rock and roll" to the American radio audience. What was this DJ's real name? The Lone Ranger's theme music is one of the most-recognized of all tunes. Who composed it? It's 1959, and singer Eddie Fisher has divorced his first wife and married Elizabeth Taylor. Such a scandal! Who was Fisher's first wife? Which musician scandalously married his 13-year-old cousin (first cousin once removed) in 1957? 1958's Chantilly Lace was the biggest hit record for The Big Bopper. What was this artist's real name? From 1966-2010, Jerry Lewis hosted an annual telethon to raise money for the fight against ... What musical instrument did bandleader Lawrence Welk play? Single Room Furnished starred blonde bombshell Jayne Mansfield, and was her final film. What became of her? What was the name of ventriloquist Paul Winchell's most famous dummy? What unlikely inventor held 30 U.S. patents, including one for the first implantable artificial heart? Which comedian was known as The King of Deadpan? What was "Castle Bravo" ? In TV ads, what product was "Mmm, mmm, good!" ? "Test tube baby" is what the popular media called the end result of in vitro fertilization (IVF). When and where was the first such baby born? Where in California was Richard Nixon's "Western White House"? Who was responsible for 1951's "shot heard 'round the world" ? Most of The Beatles' songs were written by the team of Lennon and McCartney. Can you spot the one song in this list penned by George Harrison? The song, A World Without Love, was written by Lennon/McCartney and was a #1 hit in the U.S. in 1964, but it wasn't recorded by The Beatles. Who recorded it? For which product or service did the comedy team of Jerry Stiller and Ann Meara write and perform many humorous radio commercials? In 1949, Antonio Egas Moniz of Portugal received the Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine for his pioneering work on ... Complete this advertising slogan: "Everything's better with ____ on it." In TV commercials, who scolded customers, telling them, "Please don't squeeze the Charmin!" while secretly squeezing it himself? The 1971-72 novelty hit, Brand New Key, included the lyrics: I got a brand new pair of roller skates You got a brand new key I think that we should get together and try them out you see Who wrote and first recorded it? Which one of the following people once suffered a nervous breakdown and spent eight months in a mental hospital? What was the capital of the German Democratic Republic (East Germany)? One of the most horrific events of the Vietnam War was the March, 1968 mass murder of civilian women and children by U.S. troops. This incident is known as the ... With a series of records, The Beatles held the #1 spot on the Billboard Hot 100 chart continuously from February 1, 1964 to May 2, 1964. Which recording artist finally took over the #1 slot from The Beatles? On April 4, 1964, songs by The Beatles held the top five slots on the Billboard Hot 100 chart. Which songs were these? (Select five.) Can you identify The Monkees and indicate which instrument each of them played? Can you match the birth name of each actor with the name Hollywood gave him? Who was the opening act for The Monkees during their Summer, 1967 concert tour? Before deciding to seek out four "unknown" singer-actors, the producers of The Monkees sitcom considered basing the show around which existing pop group? Ten years before becoming one of The Monkees, Micky Dolenz (credited as Mickey Braddock) starred in another TV series. Which one? Which of these costumes was the first "work uniform" ever to be granted trademark protection by the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office? Each of the TV shows on the left shared a star with one of the shows on the right. Can you match the shows that shared a star? Can you match the birth name of each musician with his stage name? The following sentences employ some awfully good puns, and are parodies of a style of writing found in certain children's books. "Pass me the shellfish," he said crabbily. "Who discovered radium?" asked Marie curiously. "Hurry up and get to the back of the ship," he said sternly. "I know who turned out the lights," she hinted darkly. What are such groaners called? Johnny Carson was best known for his opening monologue, interviewing skills, and comedic skits on NBC's The Tonight Show, but he was also an accomplished ... What common annoyance to urban TV viewers has quietly disappeared? While best known for his comic acting abilities, Jonathan Winters is also an accomplished ... Can you match these well-known people with their lesser-known accomplishments? Who was Woody Allen's first wife ("the Dread Mrs. Allen")? During the height of Beatlemania, Louise Caldwell provided "inside information" reports for several American radio stations on the daily doings of The Beatles. What relationship did Ms. Caldwell actually have with the band? The 26th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was adopted in 1971. What did it change? Science fiction author Theodore Sturgeon was the inspiration for the fictional character Kilgore Trout, who often appears in the works of which writer? Can you identify this logo? Which one of these musicians was never a member of The Rolling Stones? Back in the '50s and '60s, many baseball players spent their entire Major League careers with one team. Can you match these players with their teams? Bess Myerson was New York City's first Commissioner of Consumer Affairs. For what else is she known? In early 1961, John F. Kennedy helped to end blacklisting of Hollywood personalities by the House Un-American Activities Committee. What did he do? "Mother, please! I'd rather do it myself!" was the catchline in commercials for which product? 1968 saw the first cigarettes marketed specifically to women. Which brand was this? Which product was said to contain "600 tiny time pills"? Lincoln Continentals of the early '60s were distinguished by having what unusual design feature as standard equipment? In what make of car was JFK riding when he was assassinated? Which of these soul/rock artists did NOT have a Billboard Hot 100 hit with a song first recorded by The Beatles? Can you match each of these ad slogans with its product? Benson & Hedges brought the first 100 mm. cigarette to the U.S. market in 1967. Which brand countered with a cigarette that was "a silly millimeter longer"? Which candidate used the campaign slogan:" In your heart, you know he's right" ? Can you match these running mates in their losing bids for the White House? Back in the '50s and '60s, Haile Selassie I was Emperor of Ethiopia. What else is he known for? Since 1962, Playboy magazine has featured lengthy interviews with a wide variety of influential people, including all but one of these. Which one has never been the subject of a Playboy interview? Who was Dobie Gillis' heartthrob? Every dog has its day, and (nearly) every day has its song. Can you match these '60s hits with their recording artists? Francis Gary Powers ... Can you match each movie with some of its main characters? Class difference (rich guy/poor girl, or rich girl/poor guy) was a theme of several Baby Boomer-era pop songs. Which of these was NOT about class difference? The men's wear pictured here was fashionable in the '60s. What was it called? In the 1950s, President Dwight D. Eisenhower declared that something was "a terrible thing to do to the American people." To what was he referring? Which of the following was NOT an Elvis Presley film? Match each TV game show with its original host. In 1964, Kitty Genovese gained fame when she .... Albert DeSalvo gained fame when he ... By which of these nicknames was CBS most known? Which U.S. President, although Protestant, took the Oath of Office with his hand on a Catholic missal? Which member of the Our Gang / Little Rascals cast started out being portrayed as a girl, but after several films was then portrayed as a boy? Who was the first U.S. President to have been a Boy Scout? In 1963, Australian musician Rolf Harris had a novelty hit in the U.S. with a song titled ... In 1969, John Lennon changed his middle name. He wanted to be known as "John Ono Lennon," but British law did not permit discarding a name given at birth, so he simply added Ono to his original middle name, which was ... Which British rock band had more appearances on The Ed Sullivan Show than any other such group? What is Paul McCartney's middle name? Which one of the following was never Vice President of the United States? The Ed Sullivan Show featured a wide variety of musicians, comedians, actors, dancers, and other performers in its 23-year run. Which act appeared more frequently than any other (some say 67 times) ? Which one of the following never appeared on The Ed Sullivan Show? Which one of these television stars did NOT also have at least one Top 40 pop hit? Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In had a segment called "News of the Future," predicting unlikely or bizarre future news stories. A couple of times, though, these "joke predictions" actually came true. Which TWO of these are Laugh-In "News of the Future" items that came to pass? Can you match each Western TV star with his or her horse? Can you match each of these TV characters with his sidekick? If a Baby Boom-era pop/rock group was named after a band member, chances are it was the lead vocalist. But not always. Of the following list, which is the only group that WAS named after its lead vocalist? What was the first nationwide color TV broadcast in the U.S.? Can you identify Bamboo Harvester ? Everyone knows that the Lucy character on I Love Lucy was the wacky wife of a Cuban-born New York bandleader. Which of these describes the Lucy character on The Lucy Show when it debuted in 1962? During the Vietnam War, protest groups sometimes identified themselves by using the name of a city and a number. Which of these was NOT a real protest group that was brought to trial? What did Newton Minow famously call a "vast wasteland" in 1961? TV commercials for which product featured a former Miss Sweden cooing, "Take it off, take it all off”? In 1963, President and Mrs. Kennedy had a third child, who lived only two days. What was the child’s name? Which TV show began with a man intoning, "Man ... woman ... birth ... death ... infinity"? Which game show had a "Heart Line" that viewers could call to help out a contestant who didn't win any money? Until 1960, no comedy album had ever reached #1 on the Billboard charts. Which one of the following did so that year, topping the Broadway cast album of The Sound of Music and albums by Frank Sinatra and Elvis Presley, among others? Which pop song did the FBI investigate for 31 months, only to conclude that they were "unable to interpret any of the wording in the record"? In which Top 10 hit does Elvis Presley sing the words, "Oh, fiddle-de-dink!" ? In the lyrics of which one of these songs does the word “groovy” NOT appear? Do you want a car with gull-wing doors that open and close at the touch of a button? There's been only one production-model car with that feature. Which one was it? In the 1964 Jan and Dean song, which two cars participated in the disastrous drag race that ended at Dead Man's Curve? (Select two.) Which of these colors featured most frequently in the titles of pop songs of the '60s? South Street was a Top 10 hit for the Orlons in 1963, with lyrics that began, "Where do all the hippies meet?" What city were the Orlons singing about? We knew many TV characters by their nicknames, but they had "real" first names as well. Can you match these characters with their first names? Can you match each of these TV characters with his show? Here are characters from various comic strips. Match each character on the left with the character on the right from the same comic. Many Boomers remember Gumby, the green/blue stop-action animated clay figure. But can you name these other characters from his TV show? What's the name of this creature from the Howdy Doody TV program? The Howdy Doody TV show featured audience participation, with about 40 children seated in bleachers onstage. What were these lucky kids called? Can you match these current sports teams with their former home towns? Except as indicated, all are Major League Baseball teams. In 1969, rumors surfaced that someone had died and been replaced by a look-alike. The rumors took hold, and people worldwide searched for clues. Whose death had been falsely reported? The wives in The Stepford Wives were special because they ... Abraham Zapruder ... Can you match the songs on the right with the Broadway musicals they’re from? The film, The Thomas Crown Affair (1968), won the Academy Award for Best Original Song. What song was this? During which time period did Chuck Berry have a #1 pop hit? Which of these was the first Beatles album NOT to have the word "Beatles" on the front cover? Which "weekly" '60s TV show was so popular that when it debuted, it was shown on two consecutive nights, Wednesday and Thursday? In the 1958-61 U.S. prime-time TV seasons, which type of show occupied the top three popularity spots? For many years, soap operas were aimed at stay-at-home housewives, and therefore aired during the daytime. Which was the first soap opera to air in prime time on a major U.S. TV network? You don't know shit from __." What Top 10 song from the early '70s included the words, "I know," 26 times in a row? Who referred to the sentence, "I'm from the government, and I'm here to help," as "the nine most terrifying words in the English language"? Whose desk sported this sign? Who pleaded, "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!" ? Who asked, “Where's the beef?” in a U.S. Presidential primary debate? Who famously said, "Senator, you're no Jack Kennedy" ? What was the name of Mister Ed's owner? The movie industry developed wide-screen technologies in order to compete more effectively with television. What was the name of the wide-wide-screen motion picture process, first used in 1952, that employed three synchronized projectors to produce an image covering 146 degrees of an arc? Which comedy team made some 3-D movies in the 1950s? Which one of the following was NOT a member of the Not Ready for Prime-Time Players when Saturday Night Live debuted in October, 1975? The Champs' song from 1958, Tequila, famously ends with the band shouting "tequila!"  Which other song from the late 1950s ends with someone saying "tequila!" ? Starting in the 1950s, this symbol (shown here with the wording removed) meant that ... What event or development inspired Tom Paxton to write the song, I Don’t Want a Bunny Wunny ? The kids' magazine, Highlights for Children, (found in many a dentist's office!) featured concise behavior lessons demonstrated by two cartoon kids, one of whom did everything wrong and the other of whom did everything right. The two kids were named ... In 1967, when a certain long-running TV program was in danger of being canceled, Sen. Robert Byrd (D-WV) spoke on the Senate floor in an effort to save it. The program continued for another 8 years. What show was Sen. Byrd so fond of? In 1969, Sen. John Pastore (D-RI) chaired hearings on the subject of TV violence. What popular CBS show was abruptly canceled when it failed to tone down the violence? In the 1964-65 TV season, similar shows featuring live pop/rock performances and go-go dancing debuted on two different networks. Which shows were these? (Select two.) Which performer incorporated “inflationary language” (e.g., “Twice upon a time… and so fifth,”) and “phonetic punctuation” into his or her act? [ ? = “scrooooch, pop!”] This artwork (shown here with the wording removed) was on the cover of a record album titled ... Which four-member rock group, with hits in the early '70s, saw half its founding members commit suicide? According to a 1959-60 hit song, who was Running Bear in love with? Decades ago, "Mommy mommy" jokes, along with other so-called "sick jokes," were all the rage. What's the punchline to this one? Mommy, mommy, why am I running around in circles? Little puzzle-drawings like this ("Ship arriving too late to save a drowning witch") were popularized in the 1950s by humorist Roger Price. What are they called? During his long career, James Brown acquired many nicknames -- some self-assigned. Which of these was NOT a nickname applied to James Brown? Tonto referred to the Lone Ranger as "__". In which year did almost all American-made cars switch from dual to quad headlights? In 1964, President Lyndon B. Johnson proposed a broad set of domestic programs he called ... In the Peanuts comic strip, what's the name of Snoopy's little bird friend? Identify Dr. Frances Horwich. What actual annual tradition originated in Al Capp’s Li’l Abner comic strip? "Femlins" were ... What was Minipoo? What product did Lionel Trains introduce in 1957 in order to appeal to girls? Which one of the following artists did NOT record for Motown Records or one of its subsidiary labels? (Think it's obvious? Think again!) In which city was Motown Records based? Which color was NOT included in the familiar small box of eight Crayola crayons? When Elvis Presley was discharged from the Army in 1960, what was his rank? Who wrote the 1968 sci-fi novel, 2001: A Space Odyssey ? Launched in 1964, Alvin (DSV-2) is a deep-submersible research vehicle owned by the U.S. Navy and operated by the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institute in Massachusetts. Can you name the company that built it? (Think outside the box.) Recording personnel Theodore Keep, Simon Waronker, and Alvin Bennett were involved in the production of which #1 pop song of the 1950s? The father of one of the main stars of TV's The Beverly Hillbillies was a well-known .. During the 1960s, some popular music songs were deemed to have words, or subject matter, inappropriate for broadcast; therefore, edited, bleeped, or censored versions of these songs were recorded and distributed. Which one of these did NOT see release in two versions, the original and one "cleaned up"? Automobile brands came and went during the '50s and '60s. Of the following makes, which was the LAST to cease production in the United States? TV's Hawaii Five-O often ended with the lead character saying ... In 1966, a just-released album by The Beatles was hastily withdrawn and given another cover because the original cover ... What do the creative works Forever Amber, by Kathleen Winsor Strange Fruit, by Lillian Smith The Children's Hour, by Lillian Hellman Naked Lunch, by William S. Burroughs have in common? In the Coasters' 1959 song, Charlie Brown, what is Charlie Brown alleged to be doing in the boys' gym? In Arlo Guthrie’s 1967 song, Alice’s Restaurant, the restaurant was located “just a half-a-mile from the railroad track” in what town? The Order of Preachers is a Roman Catholic order of friars, nuns, and lay persons founded in the 13th century by St. Dominic, a contemporary of St. Francis of Assisi. The story of the early years of the order and its founder was the subject of ... In the Peanuts comic strip, Snoopy sometimes imagined himself to be a World War I flying ace battling his nemesis, the Red Baron. What type of plane did Snoopy “fly”? "Put that in your __ and __ it." Can you complete this advertising slogan? “Gee, Dad! It’s a ____ !” For which of these is Buckminster Fuller best known? Which one of these pop music performers did NOT die in a plane crash? In which TV show did the phrase, "Whoa, Nelly!" originate? 1959's Signal 30 was a film shown in many a high school assembly to alert teenagers to the dangers of ... Which TV character always used the "shave-and-a-haircut" rhythm when knocking on his employer's door? Can you complete this classic line from Monty Python’s Flying Circus ? "Nobody expects … " In Roll Over Beethoven, Chuck Berry sings of being afflicted with two ailments. What are they? What kind of car did Peter Falk drive on Columbo ? Which of these was the first African-American entertainer to host his own hourlong weekly variety TV show? From its debut in 1957 through 1963, ABC-TV’s American Bandstand was broadcast from studios in what city? Which of the following records is held by Freddy "Boom Boom" Cannon? When they debuted in 1968, the Motion Picture Association of America's original lineup of film ratings was ... In which of these comic strips do the characters live in close to "real time," getting older as the years pass? Actor William Talman played D.A. Hamilton Burger on Perry Mason. For what else is he known? What was the centerpiece of the New York World’s Fair (1964-65)? What sort of business did Dobie Gillis' father, Herbert T. Gillis, own? Can you identify this painting? In 1973, a quip by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show sparked a temporary nationwide shortage of ... In 1956, American actress Grace Kelly married Rainier III, Prince of ... What was the credit card now known as Visa called (in the U.S.) when it was launched in 1958? The Apollo 11 spacecraft consisted of a command module, support module, and lunar module.  Two astronauts descended to the Moon's surface in the lunar module, while one remained in lunar orbit in the command module.  What was the name given to the command module? What did this symbol signify? Actor Robert Blake (Baretta) was also a child star in what series? Who sued the publishers of Mad magazine for $25 million in 1961? What was special about the Johnny Eagle series of toy guns made by Topper Toys in the '60s? According to the song, whose diet consisted of "bearcat stew"? Who, at the age of 9, was the youngest performer ever* to be nominated for an Academy Award for a lead role? * as of November, 2016 Which of these was NOT a haircare/grooming product? Do you remember the frozen toaster-size “pizzaburgers” made by Buitoni? What were they called? Which of these was a candy bar now sold as Milky Way Midnight? Fantastic Voyage (1966) was a film starring Stephen Boyd, Raquel Welch, Edmund O'Brien, and Donald Pleasence. Where did the voyage of the title take them? The Great Escape (1963 film) is based on a real-life mass escape from a German POW camp during World War II. In the film, how does Steve McQueen’s character, Captain Virgil "The Cooler King" Hilts USAAF, spend his time in the cooler (solitary confinement)? Only one of the following statements about the first Touch-Tone telephones (introduced by AT&T in 1963) is true. Which is it? Several instrumental hits by Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass were used as musical cues on what popular TV show of the ‘60s-‘70s? For what else is trumpeter Herb Alpert (of the Tijuana Brass) known? The 1968 film, Planet of the Apes, was followed by four sequels, including one of these. Which one? Author Robert A. Heinlein coined the term  grok  in his 1961 novel, Stranger in a Strange Land. What did it mean? Who or what was Fluffo? On TV's The Addams Family, Lurch responded, "You rang?" when summoned by the gong. On which other show was "You rang?" a catchphrase? All of these actors also made the charts as pop singers. But which one had a Top 10 hit with a vocal version of his own TV show's theme music? Soupy Sales’ children’s TV show featured two large dog puppets – one black and one white -- seen only as giant paws. What were the dogs’ names? What was the only American-made, mass-produced passenger car to feature a rear-mounted air-cooled engine? Who wrote the 1965 best-seller, Unsafe at Any Speed ? The whole world knows Ronald McDonald, but before Ronald, the McDonald's chain had another mascot, known as ... Who was a regular on McHale's Navy and a very frequent guest on The Carol Burnett Show ? Rachel Carson’s 1962 best-seller, Silent Spring, helped to spawn which movement or industry? Remember the small slot at the back of medicine cabinets? What purpose did it serve? From 1959 until 2008, the Lincoln cent had Abraham Lincoln on the obverse and the Lincoln Memorial on the reverse. What was on the reverse of the penny from 1909 to 1958? Who was Ivy Baker Priest? How would you erase the drawing on an Etch-A-Sketch? Which of these events occurred first? Which of these events occurred first? “Olly olly __ !” Kookie, the parking lot attendant played by Edd Byrnes on 77 Sunset Strip, often spouted hipster language ("Baby, you're the ginchiest!"). But he was also known for constantly ... The "disadvantages" of which product were humorously portrayed in 1960s TV ads? Joseph Heller's 1961 novel, Catch-22, introduced a new idiom to the English language. Which of these best summarizes a "catch-22" ? Who was the youngest solo male singer to have a #1 album on Billboard's albums chart*? (* as of November, 2016) Can you match these actresses with their TV cop/detective roles? One of the cartoon magpies, Heckle or Jeckle, spoke with a distinct New York accent. What accent did the other have? What character was a regular on both Green Acres and Petticoat Junction? What was marketed in the 1960s as "the Think Drink"? In January 1965, children’s TV host Soupy Sales was suspended from his show for two weeks. What had he done to warrant this? Which one of these was NOT one of Nancy Drew's friends or a member of her family or household? What were the Hardy Boys' first names? Twiggy was ... What was the magic phrase to open the cartoon vault on the original Mickey Mouse Club TV show? Which of these was the catchphrase (also the title of the autobiography) of Jack Paar, former host of The Tonight Show? The first widely-available diet soft drink was introduced in 1958. Which one of these was it? Can you match the store names with the initials? Which of these recordings does NOT include a reference to the Vietnam War? In her 1970 song, Big Yellow Taxi, Joni Mitchell declared, “They paved Paradise …” In the classic 1969 film, Easy Rider, who played "Connection," the man that received the contraband cocaine from stars Wyatt "Captain America" (Peter Fonda) and Billy (Dennis Hopper)? In the 1960s, "Killer Joe" Piro was best known for being ... Which one of these people disappeared in 1975 and is presumed to be dead, although a body was never found? What is the object pictured here? What are these women doing? Can you identify this car? What did a man popularly called D. B. Cooper famously do in 1971? Which one of the following did Chairman Mao’s wife prevent from visiting China with President Nixon in 1972? What was the first Disney film to have a sequel? Which one of the following is NOT a Disney film? Who played the mother on both the Lassie and Lost in Space TV shows? Who is generally acknowledged to be the creator of Gonzo journalism* ? * a style of journalism in which the reporters themselves become central figures of their stories What was the most popular brand of toothpaste or tooth powder in the U.S. from the 1920s through the late 1950s? Which one of the following was a market researcher for the Ipana toothpaste "Brusha, brusha, brusha" ad campaign, featuring Bucky Beaver, before becoming otherwise famous? "Bent Fabric" is ... Who was at the microphone during the 1974 Oscars when a man "streaked" on stage? Rudi Gernreich became famous in 1964 when he ... What is the object pictured here? What do the initials PF stand for in the name of the sneakers, PF Flyers? Can you identify the person in this photo? Before making it big in the mid-1970s, Barry Manilow was … In 1988, Bob Dylan stopped someone at a party, hugged him and said, "Don't stop what you're doing, man. We're all inspired by you." To whom was he speaking? Until 1962, the Volkswagen Beetle lacked ... Identify Carnaby Street. What was the first single by a former Beatle to reach #1 on the charts? George Harrison lost a legal battle over his song, My Sweet Lord, which was deemed to have infringed the copyright for what other song? What was Lady Bird Johnson's real first name? Who often exclaimed, "Heavens to Murgatroyd!" ? Beginning in November 1969, Native Americans staged a 19-month-long occupation of ... Which of the following, after being elected President, chose not to seek another term in the next election? (Select all that apply.) Johnny Horton had a #1 hit in 1959 with The Battle of New Orleans. The words of that song celebrate the final battle of which military conflict? Many pop songs have resurfaced in TV commercials, but I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing (In Perfect Harmony) hit the charts in 1971 after being a commercial jingle for … Which of the following characters was NOT featured in the original (1977) lineup of the Village People? The Shadow of Your Smile won an Academy Award for Best Original Song after being featured in what film? Can you complete this advertising slogan? "Wow! It sure doesn’t taste like … !” According to the song, what did Love Potion #9 look like? Which one of these is NOT an Abbott and Costello movie? Which of these songs is based almost entirely on verses from the Bible? What does the expression to “get rubber” mean? Paul Cole, a 58-year-old American tourist, is pictured on the front of which Beatles album? The Shangri-Las’ 1964 song, Leader of the Pack, was followed, two months later, by a parody called Leader of the ... What warning often accompanied the punched cards mailed with utility bills? What was the name of the on-board computer in 2001:A Space Odyssey? Which song from 1968 included the following lyrics? What's your name? (Who's your daddy? He rich?) Is he rich like me? Complete this advertising slogan from the '50s and '60s: "______ is our most important product." Which character's animated cartoons were often mini-operas, with the dialogue sung rather than spoken? The 1967 Swedish film, I Am Curious (Yellow), was notorious for its nudity and sex scenes. Which one of the following appeared in it? (No, not in one of those scenes.) In 1972, Bobby Fischer won the World Chess Championship in Reykjavik, Iceland by defeating ... How big was the infamous gap in the Watergate tapes? Which one of the following was NOT involved in the Watergate scandal? Which of the following did NOT headline a tour in England for which The Beatles were a supporting/warm-up act? Arthur Fiedler was ... The first restaurant in the McDonald's chain opened in 1955. How much did its hamburgers cost? In the ‘50s and ‘60s, what would parents and school nurses put on your skinned knee? Can you arrange these McDonald's offerings in the order they were introduced? Which one of the following ingredients was NOT in McDonald's original Big Mac? 1963”s Surf City was the first surf song to reach #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart. Who recorded it? Where, as the song goes, were there “two girls for every boy” ? To what does the term "Sanforization" refer? One of the following was a Quaker. Which one? Can you complete this advertising slogan? "Don't wait to be told, you need ... " Back in the '50s and '60s, on which of these items might you have found the Kelvinator brand name? Who gained fame as the Galloping Gourmet? "I'm no fool, no-siree / I want to live to be 93!" was the theme song of a series of educational cartoons from the late 1950s that taught schoolchildren about hazards such as traffic, fire, and sharp objects. Can you name the host of the "I'm No Fool" series? On the Rocky and His Friends animated TV series, what nation did spies Boris and Natasha work for? Which one of the following was NOT a member of the Rat Pack? TV commercials for which brand of chewing gum featured a special dance step named for the gum? Which make of car sported, during the 1960s, the largest emblem (logo) ever put on a regular production passenger vehicle? Many recall Boris and Natasha on the Rocky and His Friends animated TV series. But do you know Natasha’s surname? Which one of these was a Top 40 hit song in 1965? "For those who think young"was an advertising slogan for what product? When Richard Nixon resigned the presidency in 1974, to whom did he address his letter of resignation? “They often call me Speedoo, but my real name is …” Since 1973, what are American League baseball pitchers no longer required to do? Five of these brands are named after actual people. Can you spot them? (Select all that apply.) In what town did the Cleavers live on TV's Leave it to Beaver ? Can you match each TV show with its theme music? Note: In some browsers, you may need to manually pause one theme before playing another. The recording artist known as Donovan had several hit records in the ‘60s, including Sunshine Superman and Mellow Yellow. What's his real name? The actor who played the title role in Bachelor Father also starred in which other show? Can you identify the TV show for which this was the theme music? Can you identify the TV show for which this was the theme music? Can you identify the TV show for which this was the theme music? Can you identify the TV show for which this was the theme music? The Partridge Family TV sitcom was inspired by and loosely based on an actual pop music family. Which one? All but one of the following are recipients of the Oscar, Tony, Emmy, and Grammy awards. Which one is NOT a member of this exclusive "Grand Slam" club? Which of the following did NOT often perform as a comedy team? On which TV program would you most likely hear this catch-phrase? "Six, two, and even -- over and out." This distinguished-looking gentleman was seen in advertisements for ... Since 1997, the popular Chex line of breakfast cereals has been made by General Mills. Who made them in the ‘50s and ‘60s? Many TV game shows of the ‘50s and ‘60s featured merchandise and prizes from one of these mail-order catalogs. Which one? From 1927-1975, A&P was the largest food retailer in the U.S. (until 1965, its largest retailer of any kind). What was the full name of the company? Who first recorded Hound Dog, in 1952? "Choo-Choo Charlie" was a character used in advertising for which of these? Which of the following James Bond movies was a spoof, assembled by five directors and ten writers, unrelated to the "straight" Bond films starring Sean Connery, Roger Moore, etc.? Whose 1950s advertising campaign quickly transformed its product from one favored by women into one thought of as manly? They say life imitates art. Which one of these played a character with a certain job on a TV sitcom, and later held that same job in real life? What’s the name of the game pictured here? Who used the advertising slogan “Blow in her face and she’ll follow you anywhere.” ? Whose TV variety show included a segment introduced by girls singing "Letters -- We get letters -- We get stacks and stacks of letters" ? Can you identify this character? Who was Margie's "boyfriend" in the '50s TV show, My Little Margie ? In the Peanuts comic strip, which character spent each Halloween in the pumpkin patch waiting for the Great Pumpkin to arrive? What did John Wayne and Phyllis Schlafly have in common? The rock 'n' roll nostalgia group Sha Na Na derived its name from the lyrics of what song? “This is the dawning of the Age of ____ .” Remember 1962's Papa-Oom-Mow-Mow, by the Rivingtons? What does the lead vocalist sing about? Which one of the following was typically white in the '50s and '60s, but is now usually another color? Can you identify the person in this photo? Can you identify the person in this photo? What was the name of the hotel on Petticoat Junction ? In late 1966, Gary Lewis and the Playboys performed on The Ed Sullivan Show. Gary, who was just about to enter the Army, sang One Last Kiss, and a girl from the audience was invited onstage to kiss him goodbye. The song and the kiss mirrored a scene from which Broadway musical? Whose catchphrase was "Well, I'll be a dirty bird!" ? What famous sports figure was shaved by Farrah Fawcett in a 1978 TV ad for her line of Fabergé hair products and fragrances? Contestants on Truth or Consequences who failed to answer a tricky question correctly were met with a loud sound from ... In 1964-65, Shirley Ellis had a Top 10 hit with The Name Game. Which of the following names would it be wise to avoid while playing her game? Back in the ‘50s and ‘60s, many editions of The Saturday Evening Post featured cover art by … On You Bet Your Life, with Groucho Marx, what happened if a contestant said the secret word? In the 1967 hit, Ode to Billie Joe, the narrator -- or someone who looked like her -- and Billie Joe McAllister were seen "throwing something off the Tallahatchie Bridge."  What was it that they threw? Which TWO of these events occurred during the 1950s?  In the U.S. prior to 1967, the Memorial Day holiday was officially known as ... George Fenneman is/was ... How many husbands has Zsa Zsa Gabor had, to date? Which one of the following was NOT one of Elizabeth Taylor's husbands? What was Harry S. Truman’s middle name? Which one of these was NOT the screen name of a "Bond Girl" in a 007 film? In 1962, an oral vaccine developed by Dr. Albert Sabin was introduced to combat … What's the name of this game? In the ‘50s and ‘60s, which one of these was a sweetened puffed-wheat breakfast cereal? Can you identify Nik-L-Nip ? To what does “wow and flutter” refer? Who recommended that their product be used three times a day? When a standard audio cassette is playing, how fast does the tape move? In the 1950s, which product used the ad slogan “Relief is just a swallow away.” ? Can you identify Zip Gun ? What does ICBM stand for? Kodak introduced the Instamatic camera in 1963. For which one of these innovations is the Instamatic known? What was the name of the launch vehicle (rocket) used by NASA for the Gemini manned spaceflight program (1965-66)? From whose mail-order catalog did Wile E. Coyote obtain the various contraptions with which he hoped to catch the Road Runner? Can you identify this movie theme music? Frank Sinatra carried a roll of dimes at all times, from 1963 until his death in 1998. Why did he start doing this? Prior to Donald Trump, who was the only* U.S. president to have been divorced? Which one of the following had a White House wedding? Which world leader was prevented, for security reasons, from visiting Disneyland in 1959? Audrey Hepburn starred in the 1964 film version of My Fair Lady, but she only lip-synced the songs. Who supplied Eliza Doolittle’s singing voice? Who or what is a “Wankel” ? What does the “CB” stand for in “CB radio”? The DC-10 wide-body jet airliner was introduced in 1971. Which company built it? Idlewild Airport is mentioned in the theme song for an early-'60s TV sitcom. Where was it? Addition of fluoride to public water supplies became widespread in the U.S. around 1960, in order to ... Which one of these was introduced in 1972 and, due to its popularity and commercial success, launched the video arcade game industry? Who was known as Ol' Blue Eyes? Hey, whatcha got pokin’ out, there? The first season of Saturday Night Live included skits in the Land of Gorch, featuring … In 1960, Bulova introduced the first wristwatch to use a tuning fork and electronic circuitry; it emitted a soft hum rather than a ticking sound. What was it called? What is the object pictured here? Before replacing Shemp Howard as one of The Tthree Stooges, Joe Besser was a regular on The Abbott and Costello Show, playing a 40-year-old man dressed in a Little Lord Fauntleroy suit. What was this character's name? Can you identify this icon of "weirdo shirts" and 1950s-1960s hot rod culture? To what product did President Jimmy Carter’s younger brother lend his name? In 1965, Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards was nearly electrocuted during a concert in Sacramento, California. What is believed to have saved his life? Which one of these was NOT part of the ‘60s dance craze? Which famous sports figure became the commercial spokesperson for Mr. Coffee electric coffee makers? Who was Marilyn Monroe’s first husband? Marvel Comics has trademarked the sound that Spider-Man's web shooter makes. That sound is: When introduced in 1959, Chatty Cathy dolls could say 11 different phrases. Which one of these was NOT among them? Can you identify Bild Lilli? Can you identify the person in this 2002 photo? Who suggested, in 1967, that we should “Turn on, tune in, drop out” ? Who was Abbie Hoffman? Who did the Youth International Party (“Yippies”) support for President in 1968? Which movie from the 1960s was said to have made thousands of people afraid of taking a shower? Which TV show was subtitled "American Scene Magazine"? Both Neil Diamond and the Hollies had hits with the record, He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother. Where did the songwriters get that phrase from? Who reportedly made Lady Bird Johnson burst into tears at a White House luncheon in 1968? Can you identify this sound? Edward D. Wood, Jr. wrote and directed a film, released in 1959, that some critics have called “the worst movie ever made”. Which film was this? Can you identify Bwana Devil ? Identify VISTA from 1964: One of the following fictitious entities was featured on TV’s The Name of the Game (1968-71) and later become a reality. Which one? Who won the Korean War? Which of the following was once employed as a Playboy Bunny? Theodor Geisel was a successful writer, but he used a pseudonym. What was it? The “Dear Abby” advice column was started in 1956, by … Robert Loggia starred in the 1966-67 TV series, T.H.E. Cat.  What did T.H.E. stand for? Billy Graham, Dick Clark, and Joe DiMaggio all ... P. D. Q. Bach scholar, "Professor" Peter Schickele, claimed to be Chairman of the Department of Musical Pathology at what school? Can you identify the original members of The Mamas and the Papas? (Select four.) Which of these foreign-language pop hits contains the line, translated into English, "I'm not a sailor -- I'm a captain!" ? Satirist Tom Lehrer contributed several songs to which TV series in the mid-'60s? in what car did Tod and Buz tour the U.S.A. on TV's Route 66 ? "Cowabunga!" -- the expression of awe or surprise used in the 1960s by surfers and, decades later, by Bart Simpson and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles -- came from ... What was on the reverse side of the Kennedy half dollar when it was introduced in 1964? What plane was flown by the airmen of TV's 12 O'Clock High ? In her 1964 hit song, Petula Clark suggested that you should go Downtown and listen to what type of music? Janis Ian wrote and recorded her first hit single, Society’s Child, in 1964, when she was 13. What was the song about? Whose flag was this? Other than Psycho, can you name two movies featuring Anthony Perkins? What is the object pictured here? Who had a #1 hit in 1953 with (How Much Is) That Doggie in the Window? Although it would be considered very politically incorrect today, Ray Stevens’ novelty song, Ahab the Arab, reached #5 on Billboard's top 40 chart in 1962. What was the name of Ahab’s camel? Who had a big hit with Personality in 1959? What has Microsoft’s Bill Gates called “the first interactive TV show” ? Who had a hit record in 1962 with Speedy Gonzales ? This excerpt from Elton John’s 1972 hit, Crocodile Rock, reminded many* of which previous song? * enough so that it prompted a lawsuit Can you identify the object pictured here? Who had a #1 hit single with the song, Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds ? Back in the sixties, these teams had something in common.  What was it? Boston Patriots Buffalo Bills Denver Broncos Houston Oilers Oakland Raiders Remember Witch Doctor, by David Seville? Which one of these was NOT part of the song's chorus? In the liner notes of Meet the Beatles, the first Beatles album released in the U.S., Capitol Records used the phrase "pudding basin" to describe ... In which film did Doris Day sing, Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be, Will Be) ? Whose flag was this? Back in the ‘50s and ‘60s, if you used something with the brand name LePage’s, it was probably … Which of the following comedians often appeared on the “borscht belt” circuit in New York’s Catskill Mountains? (Check all that apply, if any.) Can you identify Laszlo Toth ? Carrie Fisher played Princess Leia in Star Wars. Can you name her parents? Which television actor had been a professional baseball and basketball figure, playing for both the Brooklyn Dodgers and the Boston Celtics? What was the name of the fictional great ape who adopted John Clayton after her own baby died? I fought the law … In 1950s TV commercials, Clorets chewing gum was touted as having which ingredient? The 1969 film, Hercules in New York, featured an unlikely pair of actors. Which one? Which parent-child pair won a pair of Oscars for the same movie? At the Academy Awards, which film beat Star Wars for the best film of 1977? Hubert Humphrey said that he may have lost the 1968 election because … What did Richard Nixon say during his brief appearance on Rowan and Martin’s Laugh-In in September, 1968? In the third season of the 1960s TV show, Batman, the crime-fighting duo was joined by Batgirl, who was identified as: If you were lucky, there was a song named after you. Which one of the following was NOT the title of a ‘50s-‘60s Top Ten hit song? Which of these was NOT one of the 10 most popular names given to baby girls in the 1950s? Which of these was NOT one of the 10 most popular names given to baby boys in the 1950s? In 1967, there was a rumor -- since debunked -- that one could get high by smoking ... What was the name of the vampire on TV’s Dark Shadows daytime soap opera? In 1960, Israeli agents captured a high-ranking Nazi fugitive in Buenos Aires, Argentina. What was his name? Which Top 20 song from the 1960s is sung mostly in Creole slang -- the exact translation of which is a matter of dispute? In an oft-replayed appearance on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson, who demonstrated his tomahawk-throwing skills, but hit the target embarrassingly low? To which Indian tribe did Howdy Doody‘s Chief Thunderthud belong? Which of the following TV shows was a spin-off of another spin-off? Can you identify this sound? Which 1965 film was dedicated to Elias Howe, who in 1846 invented the sewing machine? The 1961 Academy Award for Best Original Song went to Moon River. In which film was it featured? Can you identify this sound? Can you identify Royal and Underwood? In Chuck Berry’s song, Memphis, Tennessee (or simply Memphis, as in Johnny Rivers’ 1964 version), who is the singer trying to contact on the telephone? Which of these best paraphrases the advice given by Gerry and the Pacemakers in a 1964 hit song? Which of these best paraphrases the advice given by Jimmy Soul in a 1963 hit song? In a famous routine, Abbott and Costello (well, Costello, anyway) proves that 7 X 13 equals ... In 1965, an organization was formed to promote worldwide education through musical performances. What was its name? Which one of these was NOT a hit song by the 1910 Fruitgum Company during the 1960s? Can you identify Wilma Rudolph? Can you match each of these '50s-'70s-era world leaders with his/her nation? Who was the last* U.S. president who did not have a daughter? * as of 2017 “Jeremiah was a bullfrog” is the opening line of a hit song from 1970, written by Hoyt Axton. What was the title of the song? The final Beatles single to reach #1 on the U.S. charts was ... In January 1972, Time magazine called the person featured on their cover "TV's first black superstar". Who was thus honored? Kmart, Walmart, Target, Woolco, and Big-K all opened their first discount stores in 1962. For several years, CBS’ 60 Minutes featured a segment called Point/Counterpoint, a short debate between pundits on opposite ends of the political spectrum.  One frequent pair was … Look, up in the sky! It's a __! (3-part answer) Given the following "doo-wop" songs, which is the only one in which the words "doo-wop" were actually sung? Whose logo is this? Each of the songs on the left is someone's signature tune. Can you match the songs with their singers? Lustre-Creme was ... On which of the following would you find a tone arm? In what year did the Vietnam War end? Which one of the following was NOT a member of the Warsaw Pact military alliance (1955-1991) ? Can you complete these TV show titles? With a name like ___, it has to be good. Who used the slogan “A mind is a terrible thing to waste.” ? It’s 11 o’clock. Do you know where your ____ are? 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Former New York Yankees pitcher Jim Bouton wrote a controversial tell-all book in 1970. What was its title? Which cereal is touted as the "Breakfast of Champions" ? Who used the advertising slogan: "We try harder" ? Merle Haggard had a big country hit in 1969 titled, Okie . . . Which one of the following was often heard butchering the song, Oh My Darling, Clementine ? Phil Silvers played Sgt. Bilko on The Phil Silvers Show. What was Bilko’s first name? In the early days, The Beatles recorded several covers (their versions of songs written by others), including one from which hit Broadway show? Which TV cartoon featured characters named Ty Coon, Vincent van Gopher, Pig Newton, Muskie Muskrat, Moley Mole, and Possible 'Possum? In the Smokey Stover comic strip, what was the main character’s job? What’s the name of Beetle Bailey’s nemesis? Which product was advertised as “the Uncola” ? Aren't you glad you use _____?  (Don't you wish everybody did?) 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The winner, to the musical accompaniment of Pomp and Circumstance, would be draped in a sable-trimmed red velvet robe, given a glittering jeweled crown to wear, placed on a velvet-upholstered throne, and handed a dozen long-stemmed roses. In 1957, Governor Orval Faubus called out the National Guard to stop African-American students from attending high school. Of which state was he the Governor? "I'm gonna __ like a __ and sting like a bee." - Muhammad Ali Many naval warships are nuclear powered, but what was the first nuclear powered civilian vessel? In the '50s and '60s, the name Norge was most often seen in connection with... Martial arts master Bruce Lee co-starred on which '60s TV series? Where did TV’s Laverne and Shirley work? When a typewriter rang a small bell, what did it mean? In cool weather, Polaroid instant photos developed very slowly. What did Polaroid suggest that you do if the temperature was 40°F or below? Can you identify Evelyn Wood? 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The PAM cooking spray was introduced in 1961. The name PAM is an acronym for ... In the Bobbsey Twins series of children's books, the family had two sets of fraternal twins.  What were the twins' first names? The "nonfiction novel", The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test, was published in 1968.  Who wrote it? The novel, Lolita, was published in 1955.  Who was its author? Nebraska has an official State Soft Drink.  What is it? In TV commercials, which product was touted as being “fruit juicy”? What color are the stripes on the typical barber pole? Which Apollo 11 astronaut remained in lunar orbit in the command module while the other two continued to the Moon's surface? Which beer was advertised with the slogan: "The beer that made Milwaukee famous" ? The original Monopoly game board featured properties (e.g., Marvin Gardens, St. Charles Place) named after actual places in or near which city? The original Monopoly game board featured four railroad properties. What were their names? (Select four.) Complete this advertising slogan: "Ruffles _____" Complete this '60s musical refrain: "Hey!  You!  Get off of my __." Match the make of the car with the model from 1960. Complete the title of this 1966 hit by Mitch Ryder and the Detroit Wheels: Devil with ______ On Which one of these bandleaders had a #1 instrumental hit on Billboard's Hot 100 pop chart in 1961? While JFK was president, his family had several pets, including which one of these? Which one of these was First Cat of the United States? All but one of these quotes are attributed to NY Yankees great, Yogi Berra. Which one is NOT a Yogiism? From 1955 to 1977, the "Clown Prince of Basketball" played for the Harlem Globetrotters. He was known as ... On The Adventures of Jim Bowie, what was the title character's preferred weapon? The animated series, The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show, had several segments. Which one of these was NOT among them? In what year do The Jetsons live? Where did George Jetson work? 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These performances, most of which included light shows in venues such as Fillmore East, were called ... “Let your fingers do the walking …” Frankie Ford had a hit record in 1959, singing: "Oo-ee, oo-ee baby, won't you let me take you ..." On the Rhoda TV sitcom, the doorman was often heard on the intercom, but we never saw his face. What was his name? In which mountains did the Beverly Hillbillies live before moving to Beverly Hills? What was the name of the Cartwrights’ cook on Bonanza? Beetle Bailey has a relative in another comic strip. Who is it? Mary Tyler Moore's production company, MTM Enterprises, created several hit TV series, all of which showed the MTM logo at the end of each show. What distinctive feature did the logo have? According to the lyrics of the song that introduced it, doing which dance was "easier than learning your ABC's"? Two different actors portrayed Samantha’s husband, Darin, on TV's Bewitched. Can you name them? (Select two.) 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Whose slogan was: Better Things for Better Living...Through Chemistry ? In which of his hits did Elvis Presley attempt to quote Shakespeare? In 1966, Nancy Sinatra had a #1 hit record titled, These Boots Are Made for ... Who was Ralph Bunche? "If I knew you were comin' I'd've ..." Near the beginning of The Graduate (1967), a party guest offers one word of advice to Benjamin. What word is that? Complete this line from the 1959 song, Seven Little Girls Sitting in the Back Seat, by Paul Evans: "We're having fun sittin' in the back seat ..." Which TV theme song promised, “You’ll laugh so hard, your sides will ache” ? The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) was created by executive order and later ratified by Congress. Who issued the executive order? Which of these pop songs, when released, urged listeners to do a dance that didn't exist? A character portrayed by Edd Byrnes on TV inspired a pop song titled, _____, Lend Me Your Comb. 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The comic book super-villain Bizarro was conceived as a "mirror image” of … In what city did Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. delivered his "I Have a Dream" speech (August 28, 1963) ? In the 1968 film The Party, Peter Sellers' character spends nearly half a minute doing which one of these things, non-stop? Complete this classic ad slogan: "Which twin _____ ?" Can you spot the person whose birth name was Leslie Lynch King, Jr.? What’s the next lyric line from The Moody Blues’ 1970 song, Question ? Why do we never get an answer when we’re knocking at the door with a thousand million questions ________ ? Which one of the following celebrities married into the Kennedy family in 1954? Barbara-Ann reached #13 on Billboard's Hot 100 chart in 1961. Who recorded it? The Stonewall riots in the summer of 1969 are viewed today as one of the most important events leading to ... 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Available in small quantities in tonic water, quinine, which comes from the bark of the cinchona [sin-koh-nuh] tree, was first used to treat what tropical disease?

From Pharmacy to the Pub — A Bark Conquers the World: Part 1 :: ChemViews Magazine :: ChemistryViews Magazine: From Pharmacy to the Pub — A Bark Conquers the World: Part 3 Cinchona, or quina, refers to a genus of about 38 species in the family Rubiaceae, first found in forests of the tropical Andes. Known to natives in Peru as “quinaquina” (bark of the barks), it is perhaps the greatest gift from the New World to the Old World. In particular, its bark yielded the first effective remedy for malaria, one of the most dangerous of infectious diseases. The chief component of cinchona bark, quinine, is still used as a medication – but also for preparing tonic water and Bitter Lemon. There is thus good reason for having a closer look from a chemical point of view at this bitter tree bark. 1. A Good Medicine Needs to be Bitter! Upon their discovery of cinchona bark, the Spanish conquistadors—acting on a premise firmly grounded in the healing arts since antiquity—assumed from the very outset that there had to be a connection between the fever-reducing activity of this curative agent and the material’s bitter taste. It would therefore not have been surprising if the Spanish had themselves attempted to treat the fevers of malaria—first encountered in the context of the slave trade [1]—with the bitter bark of the cinchona tree. Jesuit missionaries active in South America in the 17th century were familiar with, and also documented, the antifebrile activity of cinchona bark, bringing large quantities of the unusual material back to Europe as a medicinal agent. Ground-up cinchona bark thus came to be known as “Jesuit powder”, and its curative powers soon aroused the interest of European apothecaries and botanists. Scientific excursions were organized to the New World for the specific purpose of locating and describing the source plant. Its German name, “Chinarindenbaum”, represents a combination of the German (Rinde) and old Peruvian (kina or quina) words for bark, together with the German for “tree” (Baum). Also in old Peruvian, by the way, kina-kina means “highly cherished bark” [2]. A legend (since refuted) long held that the Spanish Countess of Chinchón, wife of a viceroy of Peru, was cured of malaria thanks to a brew of cinchona bark. The news of this cure so impressed the Swedish botanist Carl von Linné (1707–1778) that he conferred upon the genus to which the cinchona tree belongs, the name of the Countess. One “h” was lost supposedly through a typographic error, so the corresponding genus was officially designated Cinchona at the London International Botanic Congress of 1866, a name that still applies today [1]. 2. Cinchona Trees Cinchona trees can grow to a height of 30 m (nearly 100 ft). They are evergreens, distinguished by a rounded crown surmounting a slender trunk. The leaves may be up to 20 cm (ca. 8 In) long, although the blossoms (pink or red) are small, and occur as terminal panicles. As already indicated, the bark of these trees is an important source of quinine and other alkaloids. A first harvesting can be undertaken when a tree is 6–7 years old. Maximal quinine concentrations are reached after about 10–12 years. For harvesting purposes, the bark is cut perpendicularly to the trunk, and in a circular fashion. The resulting strip is then removed from the trunk and dried in the sun (Fig. 1). Figure 1. Bark of the cinchona tree. Cinchona trees, members (as noted above) of the family Rubiaceae, are native to the mountainous regions of Central and South America. Their genus (i.e., Cinchona) encompasses ca. 23 different species, although it is difficult to specify a precise number, both because various synonyms have been incorporated into the classification scheme, and there exist also many hybrids. “False” cinchona barks are any that fail to show antifebrile activity. In general, this is a straightforward consequence of a relatively low quinine content. On the other hand, the bark from many cinchona species presents a very high level of alkaloids, above all, the alkaloid quinine. This level varies among the individual species, which are otherwise very similar, causing the ruination of some plantation developers who suffered the misfortune of having tended the wrong plants. Trees of the species Cinchona ledgeriana or C. calisaya are noted for their especially high alkaloid content. These species have in the meantime been cultivated also in Africa and Asia, for the express purpose of quinine extraction. 3. Isolation of the Active Substance Quinine As with any natural remedy, pulverized cinchona bark is difficult to dispense satisfactorily due to inevitable variation in the content of the active component. The first person to try to find this “active principle” of cinchona bark appears to have been the Portuguese physician Bernardino Antonio Gomes (1769–1812), who in 1811 succeeded for the first time in isolating a crystalline substance from a cinchona bark extract, one that he called “cinchonin” [3]. In 1819 the apothecary, chemist, and physician Friedlieb Ferdinand Runge (1794–1842) believed that he, too, had isolated the active principle from cinchona bark. Both had very probably recovered quinine, but as samples that were still highly impure. It was left to the French apothecaries Pierre Joseph Pelletier (1788–1842) and Joseph Bienaimé Caventou (1795–1877) to further develop the isolation procedure of Gomes and thereby achieve the first preparation of pure quinine. In their publication in 1820 the latter two scientists called upon colleagues to test, in practice, the therapeutic properties of this pure quinine [3]. Since Pelletier and Caventou described very precisely their isolation procedure, physicians and apothecaries everywhere found themselves in a position to isolate for themselves a supply of quinine, starting with cinchona bark. This pure and precisely dispensable substance was indeed found to be highly effective, and it quickly displaced pulverized bark as a remedial agent. Because of the high demand for pure quinine, the first quinine factories were soon established, representing in effect the advent of the modern pharmaceutical industry. 4. Theft of Seeds: A Crime Leading Directly to a Knighthood Cinchona bark was such a profitable export for the Andean states Bolivia, Columbia, Ecuador, and Peru that, in the mid-19th century, total bans were declared with respect to the export of any vegetable matter related to the cinchona tree, this as a means of preserving absolute monopoly positions. Violations of the export ban were subject to the death penalty. The inevitable result of such export controls was a sharp increase in the world price for cinchona bark. Europe had become heavily dependent on the bitter medicine against malaria, especially the major colonial powers after their annexation of extensive tropical regions infested with the disease. This led in turn to ever-increasing demand. The Dutch were especially conscious of the importance of having cinchona plantations on land under their own control, so that in 1851 the Dutch minister of colonial affairs commissioned a botanical excursion with an especially adventurous goal [1]: despite threats of the death penalty, this team was sent off to collect (better: steal) seeds and seedlings of the cinchona tree for the purpose of planting them in the Dutch colonies in Indonesia, thereby breaking the monopoly of the South Americans. As formal justification for this criminal act, a marvelously altruistic excuse was developed: the honorable purpose underlying the endeavor was “rescue of the cinchona tree from its otherwise potential extinction”, to be accomplished through targeted cultivation elsewhere. The German botanist Justus Karl Hasskarl (1811–1894) was entrusted with this delicate Dutch assignment. He had already spent ten years in the Dutch Indies as director of the Buitenzorg Botanical Garden on Java, where he studied the flora and ecology of that island. In 1852 Hasskarl traveled to Peru, learned the local language, procured letters of recommendation and appropriate official passes, and set off on a long hike through the Andes. He wandered, incognito, for a total of two years through the forests and jungles of the mountainous region. By June, 1853, Hasskarl was able to send a small box of the delicate seeds back to Holland (Fig. 2). In May, 1854, he even managed to transport 200 fresh seedlings to Java, where he successfully planted them. For this thievery, or to put it more diplomatically “in recognition of his meritorious feat”, the Dutch king conferred upon Hasskarl a knighthood in the Order of the Lion, at the same time placing him in charge of establishing a Javan source of cinchona bark [4]. Figure 2. Seeds of the tree. Hasskarl’s Java legacy proved, however, to be significantly less valuable to the Dutch crown than originally promised: only about 10 % of the cultivated trees were ultimately found to provide a sufficiently high level of quinine. The rest were disappointingly useless. Apart from expeditions organized by governments, there were also independent adventurers who set out to track down and steal the valuable plant material. The Englishman Charles Ledger (1818–1905) read in a newspaper that the English government was planning an expedition for 1856 in search of cinchona seeds and plants. Ledger was himself interested in botany, and thus, accompanied exclusively by natives, he embarked on his own quest for seeds of the cinchona tree. In his case, however, the goal was seeds exclusively from trees whose bark was already known to have a high quinine content. The seeds he recovered were first offered to the English government, without success, so he also later turned to the Dutch, who rewarded him with 100 gulden [1, 5]. Using Ledger’s seeds, the existing plantation on Java was reconstituted after 1865, based exclusively on the new cinchona species, which in his honor now bears the name C. ledgeriana (C. calisaya). Incidentally, Ledger had financed his expedition himself, but in the end he earned very little from it. Once the promised spectacularly high quinine yield was confirmed, the Dutch reportedly paid Ledger an additional 500 gulden. Ledger himself, in a letter to his brother, acknowledged receiving a first payment, albeit of only £50, with a second installment of £100. He complained in a letter to his brother: “Investors are always losers”. Nevertheless, he went on also to write that he was proud that one of his dreams had been fulfilled: “Europe is no longer dependent on Peru or Bolivia for its supply of life-giving quinia.” [6] 5. Cinchona Conquers the World Although the planting of cinchona trees for harvesting their bark was initially treated as a state monopoly, by the end of the 19th century private investors and farmers increasingly sought their fortunes here. In 1876 the first cinchona bark from a private source was marketed. Cultivation, harvest, and processing of the bark were further optimized: grafting of quinine-rich plants on to varieties that were seemingly quite robust made it possible to develop especially resistant yet highly productive strains. Indeed, the quinine content of bark in individual cases reached values as high as 20 % [1]. Various alternative harvesting techniques were also examined and introduced. In the 1930s, the cultivation of cinchona trees on Java was perfected to such a degree that 97 % of the quinine utilized worldwide originated in the ca. 10 million kilograms of bark from this one source. Starting around 1870, the extremely lucrative cultivation of cinchona was promoted in other new regions as well: huge plantations appeared in Ceylon, India, Africa, and even the United States. As ever more cinchona bark was thrust upon the world market, the price inevitably crashed. Where in 1880 a kilogram of quinine sulfate sold for 385 RM, the price fell by 1896 to 32 RM. Many plantation owners were forced into bankruptcy, as a result of which the area under cultivation worldwide was drastically reduced; in Ceylon, for example, it went from 26,000 ha in 1883 to a mere 500 ha in 1898 [7]. 6. Quinine, the Rhine, and Germany From our vantage point today, malaria is seen exclusively as a tropical disease. This interpretation is contradicted by the facts, however, since not all that long ago malaria was a serious problem in Central Europe and in parts of the United States. Thus, in the swampy Rhine lowlands, for example, there was a heavy demand for quinine as an antifebrile medication, and it is little wonder that, among others, an Oppenheimer pharmacist, Friedrich Koch (1786–1865), would follow with considerable interest the quinine isolation techniques of Pelletier and Caventou, and then himself try to find a simple and economical way to obtain pure quinine from cinchona bark. Koch is said to have himself succumbed to an insidious case of malaria, and thus he had a vested interest in a practical isolation process. Koch’s industrial extraction procedure of 1823/24 led not only to good yields, but was in fact so effective and economical that, in principle, it is still practiced today (Fig. 3). His success from an economic standpoint was truly overwhelming, so in 1850 Koch sold his pharmacy and opened a pharmaceutical factory in Oppenheim, a city on the upper Rhine between Mainz and Worms [10]. Production here reached as much as 60 tons of quinine a year, giving Koch’s firm a market share in Germany of 80 %, and thus clear frontrunner status. Subsequent worldwide developments in the quinine market nevertheless had serious consequences with respect to the Oppenheim quinine factory, and Koch’s son Carl was actually forced to shutter the company in 1888. Figure 3. Industrial processes for isolating quinine – 1823 [8] and 2010 [9]. However, another German firm, Buchler & Co., founded in 1859 with quinine production in Braunschweig, is still today isolating quinine and other components from cinchona. Indeed, the authors of this contribution spoke at some length with the current chief executive officer of the company, Thomas W. Buchler, who represents the fourth generation of the Buchler family to occupy this position (the interview itself will be published as next month’s ChemistryViews installment). References [1] J. Hermann, Pharm. Z. online 2001, 18. Link ; Fünf Pflanzen verändern die Welt, H. Hobhouse, dtv, Munich, Germany, 1992. ISBN: 978-3423300520 [2] U. Sellerberg, pta-forum online 2011. Link [3] W. Sneader, Drug Discovery – A History, John Wiley & Sons, Chichester, UK, 2005. [4] W. Hahn, Chemiker-Zeitung 1938, 62, 659. [5] C. Ledger, Am. J. Pharm. 1881. Link (pdf) [6] C. Ledger, Am. J. Pharm. 1881, 3, 53. [7] W. Dethloff, Chinin, Chemie Verlag, Berlin, Germany, 1944. [8] E. Schwenk, Die Wiege der Pharma-Industrie stand in Oppenheim, Oppenheimer Hefte, 2000, 22, 2–21. [9] R. Böhm and A. Perrin, Buchler GmbH, Braunschweig, personal communication.

Malaria

In what outdoor sport, sanctioned by the NHPA, scores 3 points for a ringer, 2 for a leaner, and the closet scores a point?

Malaria Drugs 210 | Malaria Malaria Drugs 210 ring-forms and gametocytes in human blood. Malaria is a mosquito-borne infectious disease caused by a eukaryotic protist of thegenus Plasmodium . It is widespread in tropical and subtropical regions, including parts of the Americas, Asia, and Africa. Each year, there are approximately 350–500 millioncases of malaria, killing between one and three million people, the majority of whom areyoung children in Sub-Saharan Africa. Ninety percent of malaria-related deaths occur inSub-Saharan Africa. Malaria is commonly associated with poverty, but is also a cause of poverty and a major hindrance to economic development.Five species of the plasmodium parasite can infect humans; the most serious forms of thedisease are caused by Plasmodium falciparum causes milder disease in humans that is notgenerally fatal. A fifth species,  Plasmodium knowlesi , is a zoonosis that causes malariain macaques but can also infect humans.Malaria is naturally transmitted by the bite of a female  Anopheles mosquito. When amosquito bites an infected person, a small amount of blood is taken, which containsmalaria parasites. These develop within the mosquito and about one week later, when themosquito takes its next blood meal, the parasites are injected into the person being bitten PDF created with pdfFactory Pro trial version www.pdffactory.com   2with the mosquito's saliva. After a period of between 2 weeks and several months(occasionally years) spent in the liver, the malaria parasites start to multiply within,causing symptoms that include fever and headache. In severe cases the disease worsensleading to coma, and death.A wide variety of antimalarial drugs are available to treat malaria. In the last 5 yearstreatment of P. falciparum infections in endemic countries has been transformed by theuse of combinations of drugs containing an artemisinin derivative. Severe malaria istreated with intravenous or intramuscular quinine or, increasingly, the artemisinin  derivative artesunate. Several drugs are also available to prevent malaria in travellers tomalaria-endemic countries (prophylaxis). Resistance has developed to severalantimalarial drugs, most notably chloroquine.  Malaria transmission can be reduced by preventing mosquito bites with mosquito netsand insect repellents, or by mosquito control measures such as spraying insecticidesinside houses and draining standing water where mosquitoes lay their eggs.Although many are under development, the challenge of producing a widely availablevaccine that provides a high level of protection for a sustained period is still to be met Signs and symptoms can haverecurrent fever every 36–48 hours or a less pronounced and almost continuous fever. For PDF created with pdfFactory Pro trial version www.pdffactory.com   3reasons that are poorly understood, but that may be related to high intracranial pressure,children with malaria frequently exhibit abnormal posturing, a sign indicating severebrain damage. Malaria has been found to cause cognitive impairments, especially inchildren. It causes widespread anemia during a period of rapid brain development andalso direct brain damage. This neurologic damage results from cerebral malaria to whichchildren are more vulnerable. Cerebral malaria is associated with retinal whitening,which may be a useful clinical sign in distinguishing malaria from other causes of fever. Species Appearance PeriodicityPersistent inliver?

i don't know

Are Zebras black with white stripes? Or white with black stripes?

Are zebras black with white stripes or white with black stripes? | HowStuffWorks Are zebras black with white stripes or white with black stripes? James Warnick/ Getty Images Before the solid-coated and dappled thoroughbreds that usually come to mind when we hear the word " horse ," there was the zebra . One of the oldest members of the horse family, the African zebra seems far more exotic than common horses and donkeys . However, it closely resembles the earliest equine ancestors [source: Groves ]. Zoologists have yet to unravel all of the genetic mysteries that lie behind the zebra's signature striped suit. The alternating color pattern works well with its native environment, deflecting up to 70 percent of the heat that hits its body [source: The International Museum of the Horse ]. The arrangement of the stripes adds another intriguing dimension to the animal's biology since each zebra has a completely unique design. In particular, the stripes on its shoulders, or withers, contain the most individualized markings [source: The International Museum of the Horse ]. From Jaws to Claws How do ducks float? If you wear a zebra-print outfit in a crowd, it nearly guarantees that someone will easily spot you. In the jungle, however, a zebra's stripes actually work as a camouflage to deter its main predators: lions and hyenas . Since the animals herd together, experts believe that the mass of stripes can confuse the predators by acting as an optical illusion that blends their figures together. Consequently, a group of 10 zebras may look like a giant striped blob that a lion wouldn't want to take on solo. For more detailed information about this natural disguise, read " How do a zebra's stripes act as camouflage ?" By and large, these ungulates -- or hoofed animals -- prefer to pal around together rather than alone, migrating as far as 300 miles (482 kilometers) to graze [source: Holland ]. Even before mating, clusters of bachelor zebras will eat together. Then, stallions will lead a number of female zebras, called a harem. Their unique stripes promote this social behavior since they can tell each other apart. Even if you aren't an equine specialist, you can easily spot a zebra from its telltale black-and-white color scheme. But which is it: black on white or white on black? Find out on the next page. 1

black with white stripes

Born on August 31, 12 AD, Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus, emperor of Rome from 37 AD to 41AD and later to be played Malcolm McDowell, was commonly known as whom?

Is a Zebra white with black stripes or black with white stripes? - General Discussion - MLP Forums Is a Zebra white with black stripes or black with white stripes? Started By Krystal , Jun 15 2012 08:20 PM Please log in to reply 31 replies to this topic Posted 15 June 2012 - 08:20 PM Well? Users Posted 15 June 2012 - 08:24 PM Due to pigment activation, the Zebra is black with the stripes being a case of pigment inhibition, making those stripes come off as white. I think I am, therefore I am. I think. Users Posted 15 June 2012 - 08:25 PM Yes. Posted 15 June 2012 - 08:26 PM Or in Zecora's case, grey with darker grey stripes. Posted 15 June 2012 - 08:28 PM What Strife said And, It is believed that zebras are black animals with white detail for three main reasons. The first is that white equids would not be able to survive well in the plains or forests of Africa. Secondly, the extinct species of plain zebra, known as the Quagga, had the white stripes of zebras today on the front of their bodies, but a dark coloured rump. The third reason is based on the Shadow stripes. When the pigmented white band becomes to wide, a secondary stripe starts to emerge. The idea that some zebras have white under bellies and legs is not thought to be evidence of an overall light colour, since many animals of different colours have white or lighter coloured bellies and legs. The Mysterious Masked Man of Mystery Users Posted 15 June 2012 - 08:32 PM I was beaten to it. Zebra's are shades of grey. Since black and white are not real colors according to my rather unlikable art instructor Posted 15 June 2012 - 08:36 PM My brother told me a racist joke that had to do with this topic. :/ Posted 15 June 2012 - 08:39 PM My brother told me a racist joke that had to do with this topic. :/ I think I've herd it too Users Posted 15 June 2012 - 09:56 PM I was beaten to it. Zebra's are shades of grey. Since black and white are not real colors according to my rather unlikable art instructor In the artistic world, most artists consider black and whites as shades. In the scientific world, white would be the sum of all colors and black as the lack of color. Now, it is important to remember to think of this inversely. Remember that the color(s) we see an item composed of is actually the color(s) that the item is NOT composed of. Example: An apple will look red because the apple absorbed the light spectrum that hit it ... except the red wavelength, which bounces off of the apple and into our eye. So to rephrase, black would be the lack of all color (because the object absorbs all the light wavelengths, leaving none to hit our eye) and white would be the sum of all colors (because the objects does not absorb any wavelengths within the visible spectrum, allowing all of it to bounce back into our eyes. This is why white objects appear brighter, because you have more light energy being reflected into your eye. Posted 15 June 2012 - 10:46 PM Well actually, zebras aren't necessarily constrained to only being black and white. As a matter of fact, several species of zebras are really brown and white or black, brown, and white. And that makes sense seeing as true black can only exist when minimal matter and minimal energy is present. I am only aware of Black and White. You may be mistaken with either of these: A zebra who has currently gotten dirty from mud A hybrid species, which would not make it a zebra Pigmentation variation, which would still result in Black/White If there are truly "brown" zebras running around, I would quite enjoy seeing a picture of such an interesting creature. Posted 15 June 2012 - 11:02 PM I am only aware of Black and White. You may be mistaken with either of these: A zebra who has currently gotten dirty from mud A hybrid species, which would not make it a zebra Pigmentation variation, which would still result in Black/White If there are truly "brown" zebras running around, I would quite enjoy seeing a picture of such an interesting creature. There aren't brown zebras as if their fur would only be the color brown, but nonetheless zebras exist with brown stripes (I know this as my uncle is a zoologist and he has told me many things about the animals he studies). Plains zebras for example are not only born with brown and white stripes but also feature "shadow" stripes as they mature, or stripes that appear in between the defining black and white stripes. I assure you, these "shadow" stripes are neither shadows nor dirt as they follow the same pattern as the other stripes on the zebra to a degree of extreme detail. Posted 15 June 2012 - 11:08 PM Dudes. You need to take a break. It's obvious that Zebras are blue and neon-pink. Black and white, pfft, gimmie a break. That's right, I forgot about this one: Spoiler There aren't brown zebras as if their fur would only be the color brown, but nonetheless zebras exist with brown stripes (I know this as my uncle is a zoologist and he has told me many things about the animals he studies). Plains zebras for example are not only born with brown and white stripes but also feature "shadow" stripes as they mature, or stripes that appear in between the defining black and white stripes. I assure you, these "shadow" stripes are neither shadows nor dirt as they follow the same pattern as the other stripes on the zebra to a degree of extreme detail. That isn't brown. It's a side effect of pigment inhibition. Making that section to appear brown (especially when light reflects off of it). It's an error in the process of the brain in terms of shades and shading. I have no idea whether this is legit or not, but yeah, zebra can be rather brown But turns out it's a foal. Later its stripes will get much darker That is due to pigmentation. Simple science. Most younger animals do not have full pigmentation until they mature, many species are like this (including humans). Users Posted 15 June 2012 - 11:14 PM That isn't brown. It's a side effect of pigment inhibition. Making that section to appear brown (especially when light reflects off of it). It's an error in the process of the brain in terms of shades and shading. In the plains zebra, yes it is correct, but there entire species of zebras who completely lack black pigmentation. I am not pretending to be an expert, I am simply restating the words of a person who has studied zebras before (my uncle as I mentioned before) so I may not be the best advocate for brown zebras, but I assure you that the species exist.

i don't know

Officially known as the Ryan NYP, with what name did Charles Lindberg bestow the aircraft that he soloed across the Atlantic?

The Spirit of St (Written in association with the Lindbergh Foundation & the Hall Aviation Foundation)   Young airmail pilot Charles Lindbergh loads the first sack of mail aboard a Robertson Aircraft Corporation DH 4 for the inaugural route of the St. Louis to Chicago contract airmail service in April, 1926. It was in the fall of 1926, during the lonely hours flying the mail at night, that a young airmail pilot for Robertson Aircraft Corporation, had his first thoughts about flying across the cold Atlantic waters in an attempt to capture the elusive Orteig Prize. His name was Charles A. Lindbergh. The $25,000 Orteig Prize, which had been offered since 1919 by a prominent New York hotel businessman, Raymond Orteig, for the first non-stop flight from New York to Paris, was not what interested Lindbergh. Instead, he was intrigued by the idea of demonstrating publicly that airplanes could safely link the United States and Europe, and at the same time, giving greater credibility to civilian pilots and commercial aviation. As for the danger of such an incredible flight, Lindbergh believed that neither the weather nor the dangers of a transatlantic crossing could be any worse than what he had already experienced pioneering the air-mail routes from St. Louis. Rain, snow, ice, and fog, could be compensated for with experience and through logical thinking.     Funding historic transatlantic journey As he considered how to go about getting funding for what would become an historic transatlantic journey, he devised using his personal savings, but realized that would not be enough. He organized a presentation for a number of local St. Louis businessmen, hoping they could see his vision for commercial aviation, the proven possibilities of current modern aircraft, and agree to sponsor his attempt to make a trans-Atlantic crossing. "First, I'll show them how a non-stop flight between America and Europe will demonstrate the possibilities of aircraft, and help place St. Louis in the foreground of aviation. Second, I'll show them that a modern airplane is capable of making the flight to Paris, and that a successful flight will cover its own costs because of the Orteig Prize," Lindbergh later wrote in his book The Spirit of St. Louis. Major Albert Bond Lambert was the first to pledge $1,000 toward the flight, after Lindbergh committed his own personal savings of $2,000. By February 1927, Lindbergh received complete financing for his flight from Harold M. Bixby, Harry F. Knight, Harry H. Knight, Albert Bond Lambert, J.D. Wooster Lambert, E. Lansing Ray, Frank H. Robertson, William B. Robertson, and Earl C. Thompson. The group became known as the St. Louis backers.   Single-engine monoplane with a single pilot Click on Picture to enlarge Donald Hall working on the Spirit of St. Louis design.  Because of the support from the St. Louis backers, Lindbergh was given the freedom to pursue his dream of crossing the Atlantic in a single-engine monoplane with a single pilot, which he knew was safer and more likely of success. Mr. Bixby would later name the plane, the the Spirit of St. Louis. Having been turned down by all the major aircraft manufactures, including his attempt to purchase a Bellanca (the only pre-built plane available for such a flight), Lindbergh traveled by train to San Diego and Ryan Airlines, Inc. at the insistence of his St. Louis backers. He had queried the small company before being turned down by Bellanca.   Ryan Airlines of San Diego If Ryan Airlines of San Diego could complete a specially modified aircraft, it would need to be ready in two months. Though a possible task, as far as Lindbergh was concerned his chances for success were waning. Arriving on February 23, Lindbergh soon realized that the decision whether to place an order with Ryan, and their ability to build such a plane in 60-days, rested in his estimation on one man, Donald Hall, the new Chief Engineer. The two men, scholars of current aviation technology in there own right, and experts in their fields, had much in common. Both had attended flight school in Austin, Texas at Brooks field a year apart. Hall was 28 and Lindbergh 25. Fueled by a common interest, there was a spark between the two men, and on February 25, Lindbergh placed his order for the Spirit of St. Louis.   Click on Picture to enlarge The Spirit of St. Louis under construction Immediately, Hall and Lindbergh started the work that would develop into a solid plan for crossing the Atlantic. Most issues the two agreed upon, while on other points they compromised. Lindbergh and Hall both believed that the decision to use a single-engine plane was best since it offered less chances of failure if a proven engine was chosen, like the Wright Whirlwind J-5C. The two men also agreed that the main fuel tanks should be in front of the pilot, yet Hall was concerned with forward visibility. Collaborating on a constant basis meant the two men rarely parted each other's side. Each knew the tragic result if a single fuel line busted, if icing weighed down the plane, if a major navigational error occurred, or if pilot fatigue overwhelmed Lindbergh. It quickly became clear to Hall that a completely new design was a better option compared to modifying the older Ryan M-2 model. "�It was concluded that a redesign of the production model 3-seater, open cockpit, Ryan M-2 could not make the 3600 mile flight between New York and Paris with ample reserve fuel, and that a new design development was necessary," Hall later wrote in the appendix of The Spirit of St. Louis.   February 28, 1927, The Spirit of St. Louis begins Officially starting work on February 28, this meant long hours of design, weight & balance analysis, stress analysis, drafting, inspection (Hall doubled as the parts inspector), performance analysis, and flight-test engineering. At one point Hall worked 36 hours straight, since his design work had to be finished if the Ryan manufacturing teams were to remain busy. Hall would eventually log eight 90-hour weeks to reach his 60-day goal. Utilizing the best of successful military and commercial airplanes, while incorporating a few parts from the M-2 that were practical to save time and cut costs, Hall relied on his aeronautical experience and Lindbergh's piloting expertise to push the limit.   Lindbergh's planning While the NYP (New York-Paris) design was eventually "frozen", it remained fluid throughout the 60-days as new concepts were incorporated like the periscope. Lindbergh too had much to plan, decide, check, and re-check. In those 60-days of thinking, worker inspections, and test-flights in the Ryan M-2, Lindbergh taught himself the fine art of aeronautical ocean navigation, which was new and unproven. Based off sailing charts and gnomonic maps, Lindbergh became skilled at navigation according to nautical shipping lanes and navigation by the stars. Hall proved to be helpful in this task as well, providing drafting equipment and checking Lindbergh's calculations as needed. Lindbergh carefully planned every detail of his trip and evaluated the necessity of every item he would carry. Opting to leave his parachute behind so he could carry more fuel, he also passed on a radio. He even went so far as to trim the edges off his maps, remove unnecessary pages from his notebook, and declined to take night-flying equipment in order to conserve weight on the plane.   Click on Picture to enlarge Attaching the wing to the Spirit of St. Louis-April 1927 The employees at Ryan Airlines too, leant themselves to the daunting 60-day task before them. While the initial secretiveness that surrounded the plane's construction eventually became common knowledge in the factory, each worker devoted himself or herself to the success of Lindbergh's flight. Men and women worked late into the night, while a young Lindbergh quietly walked about the factory, silently watching as they completed their work. Hall and Lindbergh would ultimately spend the majority of time and effort in designing and planning the young aviator's successful flight across the Atlantic. Between them and the Ryan Airlines, Inc. team, they had accounted for every possibility whether remote or uncommon. The chief concern, however, was pilot fatigue from the start. Yet, this too had been accounted for in the planes touchy controls and only "satisfactory" stability. Nothing would be assumed or left to chance.   Orteig Prize long shot When Lindbergh registered with the National Aeronautic Association as a contestant for the Orteig Prize, he was regarded as the long shot. All the contestants that had previously registered had multi-engine planes with multiple pilots. Only Lindbergh planned to fly alone in a single-engine plane. Later the single-engine Bellanca was registered, but it too would have multiple pilots. In spite of his flight experience and military training, some even called the young aviator a "flying fool". For pilots attempting the Prize, the rudimentary instrumentation, inaccurate weather reporting, and inadequate lighting were obstacles to be confronted with skill and determination. However, building an airplane capable of getting off the ground with the heavy load of gasoline needed for a 3,600-mile flight was the greatest challenge of all. When Lindbergh thundered down the runway in New York, the Spirit of St. Louis weighed in at 5,250 pounds, of which 2,750 pounds was gasoline (or 450 gallons), which was a feat all unto itself. Only one other plane attempting the Orteig Prize had taken to the air with that much fuel, and it was never seen again.   April 28, 1927, first flight Click on Picture to enlarge The first flight of the Spirit of St. Louis On April 28, 1927, Lindbergh wired Harry Knight in St. Louis to inform him that the plane was ready for its first flight. That first day, as captured by the photographs and memories of Donald Hall, was extraordinary. With all their hard work and diligence, Ryan Airlines had met their 60-day goal and as the Spirit of St. Louis lifted off a cheer erupted from the assembled factory crew. Their dreams and hopes were embodied in that silver plane and young aviator Charles Lindbergh. The next few days were filled with flight performance testing, minor adjustments to the plane, and the fuel load testing conducted away from the Press at a secret location. Camp Kearny, an abandoned WWI parade ground near present day Miramar, proved perfect. These tests illustrated to Lindbergh and Hall, after he had graphed the performance curves, that the plane had an abundance of power even when the fuel load was increased to 300 gallons. Lindbergh would later push those performance curves at Roosevelt Field in New York.   To Lambert Field in St. Louis With flight-testing completed, Lindbergh waited for a break in the weather, and finally on May 10 he took flight in his gleaming silver Spirit of St. Louis. Two Army observation planes and a lone Ryan M-2 carrying Hall, Mahoney, Edwards, and its pilot escorted the plane till they too turned back. Flying east alone into the coming night, Lindbergh arrived at Lambert Field in St. Louis the following morning, May 11, 1927, establishing a non-stop speed record of 1,500 miles in 14 hours and 25 minutes. Telegraphing these results back to Ryan Airlines and Hall, it proved their measurements had held, and the plane was performing well. Spending the night in his former boarding house, the next morning Lindbergh left for New York, hoping he could beat the other competitors.   Lindbergh arrived in Long Island on May 12, 1927 Click on Picture to enlarge Charles Lindbergh and the Spirit of St. Louis The mood was tense as Lindbergh and the two other contestants waited day after day for the weather to clear enough to allow a successful take-off. Spending hours reviewing weather charts, watching the mechanics tend his plane, dealing with the incessant media, while diligently guarding his take-off plans, Lindbergh found time to take in some of the sights of New York City.   Charles Nungesser and Francois Coli Missing   In the weeks preceding Lindbergh's take-off, the magnitude of danger for the flight became even more eminent in the public's eye. Just two days prior to Lindbergh leaving San Diego, the famed French pilots Charles Nungesser and navigator Francois Coli had left Paris for New York in a single-engine biplane on May 8, and had disappeared over the Atlantic Ocean. The odds, it would seem, were against any attempt to cross the Atlantic. Newspapers were peppered with stories of plane crashes and fatalities surrounding the competition. French pilot Rene Fonck crashed on takeoff from Roosevelt Field, Long Island on September 21, 1926, killing two crewmen. A third plane, the American Legion, piloted by Noel Davis had also crashed earlier that month on April 26. Both Davis and Stanton Wooster his co-pilot had been killed. Both Richard E. Byrd (who would later fly over the North Pole) and Clarence D. Chamberlin, a noted aviator piloting the Bellanca, each had minor accidents during the testing of their planes in April of 1927. Now Byrd and Chamberlin waited with Lindbergh for a final attempt.   Decision to forego a radio When pressed in New York about his decision to forego a radio, Lindbergh said, "When the weather is bad you can't make contact with the ground. When the weather isn't bad a pilot doesn't need a radio." Lindbergh had already lost his patience with the incessant and sensationalistic press. To make matters worse, he had not yet become technically eligible for the Orteig Prize, which stipulated that 60 days must elapse between acceptance of his entry papers and take-off of the flight to qualify. His St. Louis backers told him to fly when he was ready, despite the Prize.   Weather forecasts offered little hope Click on Picture to enlarge Charles Lindbergh and the Spirit of St. Louis at Roosevelt Field on the morning of May 20, 1927 May 19 was a dreary day. The weather forecasts offered little hope of a clearing in the weather in the next few days. That evening, after touring the Wright plant in New Jersey with some of his new friends, and B.F. Mahoney the owner of Ryan Airlines, Lindbergh and some others had planned to attend the Broadway show "Rio Rita." Before they arrived at the theater, however, they stopped for one more phone call to the weather bureau. There was good news, yet no one had informed him earlier. A break in the weather was predicted, with high pressure beginning to clear patches of clouds over the Atlantic. Suddenly an early morning departure was possible. The group headed back to the airfield to begin making preparations and final inspections. After working on the plane for a few hours, Lindbergh returned to the hotel just before midnight. If he was to be ready at daybreak, as he had planned, he needed to get some sleep. Upon arriving at the hotel, however, Lindbergh was confronted by a throng of reporters anxious to interview him. Word of activity in his hangar had already spread. Lindbergh excused himself as quickly as possible. Once in bed, his mind raced with a thousand thoughts, questioning, reasoning, calculating, and reviewing every decision he had made to this moment. At 1:40 a.m., he realized there was little hope for sleep.   Misty Friday morning, May 20, 1927 At 2:30 a.m. on a misty Friday morning, May 20, 1927, Lindbergh rode from the Garden City Hotel, where he and the other contestants were staying, to Curtiss Field to prepare for take-off. Even at that early hour, 500 on-lookers waited. At 4:15 a.m. the rain stopped. Lindbergh ate one of the six sandwiches he had been given the night before and ordered the Spirit of St. Louis to be wheeled outside. The weather had been too bad the night before to move the plane to Roosevelt Field. Six Nassau County motorcycle patrolmen escorted the concealed plane, which was tied to the back of a truck, and was hauled across the deeply rutted road to Roosevelt Field, where Lindbergh had planned to make his departure.   Take-off for Paris With the nose of the plane pointing toward Paris, Lindbergh worried about the take-off. He would have 5,000 feet to lift off the ground and gain enough altitude to clear the trees and telephone wires at the end of the field. The Spirit of St. Louis had never been tested carrying 425 gallons, let alone the 25 gallons of extra fuel Lindbergh ordered added (the capacity of the tanks as built came out oversize by 25 gallons). If it weren't for the water-soaked runway, the lack of headwinds, the heavy humidity that would lower the engine's r.p.m., and the untested weight of the plane, he would not have been as concerned. A bucket brigade formed to fill the plane's five fuel tanks, and by 7:30 a.m. the tanks were filled to the brim. Hundreds more people joined the crowd. With the wheels sinking into the muddy ground, Lindbergh readied himself for take-off, mentally going over his checklist and gathering all his flying experience from the past four years. Should he wait or go ahead? There were too many uncertainties, except his trust and experience in this custom designed plane. Click on Picture to enlarge Charles Lindbergh and the Spirit of St. Louis on the way to Paris! At 7:51 a.m. he buckled his safety belt, put cotton in his ears, strapped on his helmet, and pulled on his goggles and said, "What do you say -- let's try it." At 7:52 a.m., Lindbergh took-off for Paris, carrying with him five sandwiches, water, and his charts and maps and a limited number of other items he deemed absolutely necessary. The heavy plane was first pushed, then rolling, and finally bounced along the muddy runway, splashing through puddles. At the halfway point on the runway, the plane had not yet reached flying speed. As the load shifted from the wheels to the wings, he felt the plane leave the ground briefly, but returned to the ground. Looking out the side window, Lindbergh could see the approaching telephone lines. Now less than 2,000 feet of runway remained and he managed to get the plane to jump off the ground, only to touch down again. Bouncing again, and with less than 1,000 feet, he lifted the plane sharply, clearing the telephone wires by 20 feet. At 7:54 a.m. he was airborne.     33 hours, 30 minutes, and 29.8 later at LeBourget Field, Paris Although he had no forward vision during the flight (except a small periscope), and fighting off fog, icing, and overwhelming fatigue, he navigated his journey to a perfect landing 33 hours, 30 minutes, and 29.8 seconds later at LeBourget Field, Paris where a huge crowd of 150,000 on-lookers awaited his arrival. At that very moment when he was pulled out of his plane, the 25-year-old farm boy from Minnesota was transformed into the most famous hero the world had ever known. Click on Picture to enlarge   Charles Lindbergh, Donald Hall, and the Plane That Made History by Nick T. Spark Originally published in the American Aviation Historical Society Journal  and reprinted with permission. Text copyright �2005 Nick T. Spark. Unless otherwise mentioned, all photos copyright � by the estate of Donald A. Hall, Sr. and used with permission.     Click on Picture to enlarge Ryan Airlines owner B.F. Mahoney, Charles A. Lindbergh and Donald A. Hall (l-r) pose in front of the newly-completed Spirit of St. Louis at Dutch Flats in late April 1927. Lindy's stature usually dwarfed his companions; in a few short weeks so would his celebrity. In the wake of his epic flight, he became the most famous man on Earth. Hall and Mahoney, however, would remain largely unheralded. In 1998, a letter arrived at the home of Don Hall, Jr. from Ev Cassagneres, an amateur historian and author of numerous books about Ryan aircraft. "Are you," the letter began, "the son of Donald Hall, designer of Charles Lindbergh's Spirit of St. Louis?" The answer, which was in the affirmative, came as a shock to Don's young son Nova. He knew almost nothing about his grandfather, who died in 1968, several years before he was born. Now he was being told that one of his relatives had not only known Lindbergh, but that he'd been involved in one of the most important feats in aviation history. It seemed incredible. A short time later Cassagneres visited the Halls at their home in Sedona, Arizona. Unfortunately, their time together proved frustrating. Impaired by a stroke, Don Jr.'s memory of his father proved sketchy, and while Cassagneres could provide details of Donald Hall Sr.'s work with Lindy, he did not know the full story. "I know from interviewing Charles Lindbergh that your grandfather was one of the key figures in the design and construction of that plane," Cassagneres told Nova. "But I hope to learn more." The more they talked, however, the more obvious it became that barring the discovery of some forgotten book of memories, the legacy of Donald Hall Sr. had been lost forever. A little less than a year later, fate stepped in. While moving boxes in the garage, Nova discovered two sealed trunks. With the aid of a crowbar, he popped them open. The first contained only tools. The second however contained a lost treasure trove of photographs, motion picture films, logs, blueprints and mementos related to Donald Hall's work on the Spirit. By a quirk of fate, Nova had not only found something of historical importance, but something personally significant as well. The photos and other documents provide a glimpse into the life of Donald Hall, and a view into the feverish months of work that produced the Spirit of St. Louis, and a legend. It's a well-known story worth another look� Click on Picture to enlarge In 1926 Donald Hall took a leave of absence from his position as an aeronautical engineer at Douglas to become an Air Corps cadet. Hall completed the course but failed to get his wings. Ironically Hall's flight handbook bore the signature of a previous student - none other than C.A. Lindbergh. Later the two would meet face to face and share a laugh over the coincidence. Chance and coincidence - of such things history is made. Charles A. Lindbergh's first choice of airplane for an attempt at the non-stop New York to Paris flight, and the Orteig Prize that went to those who first accomplished it, was a Wright-powered Bellanca monoplane whose passenger compartment could be modified to accommodate a large fuel tank. Giuseppe Bellanca himself arranged for Lindbergh to meet with Charles Levine, the millionaire chairman of Columbia Aircraft in February 1927. Levine had the ideal aircraft, but wanted $25,000 for it - $10,000 more than Lindbergh's backers had secured. When Levine proposed that he absorb the difference in exchange for a share of the venture, Lindbergh's hopes were momentarily buoyed, and then dashed. As part of the deal, Levine demanded that he choose the pilot. For Lindbergh that was not an option. He hadn't come this far, developing his dream and assembling backers for a trans-Atlantic attempt, only to hand someone else the controls.1 About the same time that C.A.L. met with Levine, Donald Hall, a 28-year-old aeronautical engineer and graduate of the Pratt Institute, left his job at Douglas Company in Santa Monica to join San Diego-based Ryan Airlines. Ryan, a small concern which produced two highly successful monoplanes known as the M-1 and M-2, seemed a good fit for young Hall. He'd been freelancing there off and on. Now owner B.H. Mahoney, who had recently acquired sole ownership of the company from founder Claude Ryan, was in the process of building a new 42' wing model to be known as the B-1 "Brougham". He wanted Hall on his staff to work on it full time. Click on Picture to enlarg The Ryan Airlines factory, photographed sometime after 1927 - the small plaque visible in front of the building commemorates the New York to Paris flight. A small company with a fair reputation, Ryan was certainly not Lindbergh's first choice. None of the other companies he approached however, were prepared to risk their reputation on the brash, young, Air Mail pilot. Where others smelled danger however, T. Claude Ryan and B.F. Mahoney smelled business opportunity. After just a few days of work however, Donald Hall was pulled off the B-1. A telegram had arrived at Ryan from Lindbergh's St. Louis backers: "CAN YOU CONSTRUCT A WHIRLWIND ENGINE PLANE CAPABLE OF FLYING NON-STOP BETWEEN NEW YORK AND PARIS. IF SO PLEASE STATE COST AND DELIVERY DATE." The proposition itself must have thrilled Hall, and at the same time caused him some unease. Years later he admitted to feeling "a little doubtful" that such a plane could actually be built. After consulting with Claude Ryan, who although no longer a partner in the company had stayed on as general manager, Hall drew up some specifications. Shortly thereafter a reply was sent via Western Union: "CAN BUILD PLANE SIMILAR TO M-1 BUT LARGER WINGS CAPABLE OF MAKING FLIGHT. COST ABOUT SIX THOUSAND DOLLARS WITHOUT MOTOR. DELIVERY ABOUT THREE MONTHS." That terse telegram would not have sealed the deal for the Spirit had not a host of other companies, including Travel Air, Alexander and Fokker, rejected Lindbergh's inquiry outright. Even if their planes were up for the challenge, and they almost certainly were, the idea of risking corporate reputations on such a venture with a more-or-less unknown pilot must have given them pause. When the dust settled, Ryan Airlines' proposal was not the only practical one, but the only one period. So after a further exchange of telegrams discussing the practicability of the undertaking and the assembly timeframe -- the staff at Ryan agreed to Lindy's requirement that the aircraft be finished in two months instead of three - Lindy set off for San Diego. C.A.L. arrived on February 24th, and two days later having met with B.F. Mahoney concerning the financial details and with Donald Hall concerning the technical ones, signed a contract. Equipped with a Wright engine, the plane would cost $10,580. The price might have been higher but Mahoney, sensing an opportunity to make a name for his company, decided to throw in additional equipment at cost. Even with this incentive, and even though he was a man who no longer had other viable options, Lindbergh must have signed the contract with mixed emotions. The Ryan factory itself consisted of a single run-down building far removed from the nearest airstrip. It had served as a fish cannery and therefore did not exactly look or especially smell like success. Yet Lindbergh rationalized his decision, and perhaps even came to regard Ryan's peculiarities as assets. As Scott Berg wrote in his Pulitzer Prize-winning biography Lindbergh , in the end "it all smelled right - an industrious, no frills operation" that just might be able to deliver what they claimed. Click on Picture to enlarge The wing and fuselage of the first B-1 "Brougham", a successor to Ryan Airlines' successful M-1 and M-2 monoplanes, were nearly complete by the time work commenced on the New York to Paris plane. The B-1 (pictured) wouldn't fly until after the Spirit did. The finished product, like Spirit, sported a Wright engine and Fokker-type landing gear. For decades a debate has simmered regarding whether the B-1's design, or that of another Ryan product, served as a basis for the Spirit, or whether Donald Hall designed a plane from scratch for Lindy's venture. As this 1927 photo demonstrates, the NYP plane and the B-1 clearly had a shared lineage. (Photo Courtesy Ryan Aeronautical Company via Ev Cassagneres) According to Ev Cassagneres, who met Charles Lindbergh in 1968 and interviewed him several times prior to his death in 1974, what really sold Lindbergh on Ryan was Donald Hall himself. The two were about the same age, and shared a passion for the outdoors, a sense of independence, a belief in hard work and discipline, and a love of flight that had led both to enroll in the Army Air Service cadets at about the same time. As fate would have it, Lindbergh graduated with the class of '25 at Brooks Field, became a pilot, and earned a commission. Hall, despite his best efforts, washed out of Brooks in '26 and ended up flying a drafting table. They apparently got on famously, their partnership being as Cassagneres puts it "a phenomenal complementing of two brains and spirits." Hall for one must have sensed, from the moment he'd read that fateful telegram, that the task ahead would be extremely difficult. According to his own account, he initially believed that a modified M-1 or M-2 could make the record-setting flight, but as he continued his calculations Hall determined that even a stripped down variant would not fit the bill. When Lindbergh arrived in San Diego, the design specifications were further cast into question. Lindy shocked Hall, and probably everyone else at Ryan, by stating that he intended to fly the Atlantic solo -- he'd never seen fit to mention it in his telegrams! The concept had obvious merits beyond the fact that it would be an absolutely spectacular achievement. Less weight and space meant the plane could carry more fuel. But could anyone stay awake long enough to make such a flight? Hall wondered. How far was it to Paris, and how many hours would it take to get there, anyway? According to Lindbergh's 1953 book Spirit of St. Louis (also incidentally a Pulitzer winner), neither he nor Hall knew precisely. One of the first things they did together therefore was to visit a local library, where they used a piece of string from a grocery package to take measurements off a globe. 3600 miles it turned out, give or take a few, most of it across a trackless ocean. The flight would take about 40 hours. Could Lindbergh actually stay awake and pilot a plane by instrument for nearly two days? He believed he could, and he'd better be right. His very life would depend on it. What happened in the next few weeks, as the plane that came to be known as the Spirit of St. Louis took shape, has been written about many times, appeared in films and documentaries, and been subject to a great deal of hashing and rehashing by a whole host of historians and writers. While one might therefore imagine that the exact genesis of the Spirit would be a rote topic, some aspects of it remain grey areas, including Donald Hall's exact role. It's not exactly a surprising set of circumstances. For years names other than Hall's were most strongly affiliated with the endeavor. Ironically Claude Ryan, the "man who built the company that built Lindbergh's plane" received a lot of the credit, despite the fact that he had little to do with the SOSL itself. These circumstances have something to do with the focus of the media at the time, with Donald Hall himself - who likely did not want to publicize his own role lest he jeopardize his career at Ryan - and to the fact that a truly detailed discussion of the construction of the plane did not appear until 1953, twenty-six years after the fact. Indeed Charles Lindbergh's book, The Spirit of St. Louis, may have been the first to really discuss Hall's work and attempt to give him his due. Click on Picture to enlarge Don Hall, seen here drafting at his desk, once estimated he spent roughly 86 hours per week working on the SOSL. Due to the two month delivery deadline he and the Ryan crew often worked without blueprints or detailed sketches. It must have made for some frustrating days; fortunately the Ryan staff proved competent. (Right) Hall's original, hasty design for the Spirit's wing, rendered on a piece of cardboard. After the NYP craft reached Paris, Hall created a real set of blueprints which were used to build a replica aircraft for Japanese clients who intended to cross the Pacific. Ev Cassagneres has no doubt that Hall played an enormous role in the design and construction of the SOSL, and that he essentially designed a plane for Lindbergh from the ground up. Hall's own statements certainly seem to bear that out. In a report he prepared for the National Advisory Committee on Aeronautics (NACA) in July, 1927 concerning the design of the plane Hall wrote that "modification of the M-2 was less practicable than a redesign" and that as a result "the airplane was laid out anew, the fuselage following the standard model approximately in regard to design�The fuselage structure was redesigned�" He also added, "I was all alone during the design except for two nights when the purchasing agent, Walter Locke helped me with weight analysis. From the Ryan M-2 we took the wing ribs and tail surfaces, everything else was different." Essentially, Hall indicates that he created the plane more or less from scratch, although he admits to using the "standard model" as a basis. Over the years some have argued that this "standard model" might have actually been the B-1, whose original design had been sketched by designer Ed Morrow, or the M-1/M-2 which had been designed by Claude Ryan, his factory engineer W. Hawley Bowlus, and a relative newcomer to the business named John K. Northrop. For the most part, these speculations have gone nowhere due to a lack of evidence. Now however, some in-depth investigations by aircraft restorer and builder Ty Sundstrom, who is leading an effort to construct an exact replica of the SOSL as part of the Historic Flight Project, promise to shed light on the subject. In a forthcoming book, Sundstrom and aviation writer John Underwood present documentary evidence to support their belief that Hall used a pre-existing but lesser-known Ryan Airlines design, the M-3C, as the template for Lindbergh's aircraft. That is a wholly believable concept, Ev Cassagneres admits, especially given the brevity of the plane's eight week production schedule and Hall's limited engineering experience. Click on Picture to enlarge Charles Lindbergh shared Donald Hall's small office on the second floor of the Ryan Airlines factory (note Hall's drawing board in the f/g). While Hall designed the plane, Lindy spent a fair amount of time studying long-range navigation and, slowly but surely, plotted his course. Yet at the same time this type of scenario conflicts with the accepted course of events as described not just by Hall and also by Lindbergh. In his book Lindy states that he believed the aircraft to be wholly unique, noting that designing the craft from scratch had "great advantages" that more than justified the time spent building it. "Every part of it can be designed for a single purpose," he states, "Every line fashioned to the Paris flight. I can inspect each detail before it's covered with fabric and fairings� By working closely with the engineer, I can build my own experience into the plane's structure and make the utmost use of the theories he expounds." Could it be that the staff at Ryan effectively pulled the wool over Lindbergh's eyes, convincing him his plane was "special" when it was really a modified, pre-existing design? Or could it be that Lindy exaggerated his level of control over the design and construction of the aircraft? Is it possible that, by the time Lindbergh finished his book - a quarter century after the fact - he'd begun to buy into some of the legends surrounding the construction of the plane? These are interesting questions and the facts to answer them are still emerging. In truth, whether or not Hall designed a plane from scratch or merely modified -- however radically or superficially -- an existing design may not be that important a distinction. His efforts were intense and focused, and the stakes were as high as they come. The new plane had to be capable of a sustained flight farther than anything had yet flown, and of longer duration. Hall, assisted by Lindbergh, Morrow, Bowlus, shop superintendent and wing department chief Bert Tindale and the Ryan staff would attempt to produce an incredibly efficient machine designed for maximum endurance. The resulting aircraft would therefore be rather unique in history, constructed not as a commercial product or as the prototype for a new line of aircraft, but for the grasping of one very distant brass ring. Click on Picture to enlarge The steel frame of the NYP plane takes shape. Even at this early stage of construction several off-the-shelf components, including rudder pedals, the control stick and trim adjustment lever have been added to the cockpit. The decrepit state of the Ryan Airlines factory is apparent - note the shattered transom windows visible behind and above the tail! According to Hall's report, Lindbergh laid out four basic elements for the design from the very start. First, to reduce weight, increase endurance and keep it simple, the plane should be powered by a single engine. Second, for efficiency's sake it must be a monoplane. Third, it must carry at least 400 gallons of fuel with "a good power reserve on take-off" and, fourth, "it must have the pilot located in rear of all (fuel) tanks for safety in a forced landing." This last criteria, which Hall referred to as "the most radical feature of the design" in that it cut off forward vision, allegedly arose from Lindbergh's familiarity with certain disastrous hard landings in which pilots, sitting in between gas tanks and engine compartments, had been crushed to death.2 Hall's plan for the wings on the so-called "New York to Paris" (NYP) aircraft would be similar to those on the M-2, but as he wrote "it was necessary to increase the wing span by 10 feet". Elongated wings provided better long-range efficiency - and 10 miles per gallon was deemed essential. Longer wings would also reduce stress on takeoff for what promised to be, with the full fuel load aboard, a very heavy aircraft. For stability's sake, the NYP plane's engine would be moved forward about 18" from the M-2 design, and the tail surfaces shifted 30" aft. Hall knew that the tail itself should also be larger. Designing, and then constructing a new tail assembly would be very difficult given the time constraints. Instead, Hall proposed using an M-2 tail, installed two feet farther aft of where it would normally sit. Hall assured Lindy the feathers would work, but admitted in the same breath that stability would be an issue. Ever the pragmatist, Lindbergh commented that the compromise had at least one positive aspect. A little instability would produce the need for fairly constant adjustments and go a long ways towards keeping him awake on his marathon flight. Click on Picture to enlarge Equipped with wing struts and the main gas tank, the frame of the NYP plane sits inside the Ryan factory. In the background to the left is an M-2 under construction. This image, like most shown here, was likely snapped by factory photographer Maj. H.A. "Jimmy" Erickson. Also making an endurance run on the flight would be the J-5C Whirlwind engine, which represented the latest in a long line of robust, air cooled, radial power plants designed by Wright. Its immediate predecessor the J-4, set a recognized endurance standard of 50 hours, and three J-4s powered Admiral Byrd's Fokker for his North Pole flight in 1926. Hall had faith in the J-5C, and a high regard for its 220 h.p. rating - 20 more horsepower than the J-4. Notably, most if not all of the other contestants for the Orteig Prize, including Byrd, flew aircraft equipped with J-5Cs. On the NYP plane, the engine connected directly to the frame without any kind of shock mounts. According to Cassagneres, this aspect of the design did not particularly trouble Lindbergh, who was used to a little vibration, but another did: the use of long continuous tubes for fuel and oil lines. Aware that such components could be subject to damage from expansion, contraction, and vibration, he insisted they be constructed out of segmented tubes. The concept was apparently not a new one, but its use on Lindy's plane later helped cement it as a standard construction practice throughout the aviation industry. One item Hall omitted from the power plant was a carburetor air heater. It was a calculated risk -- Hall knew Lindy'd have to cross high mountains on his way from San Diego to New York and might have icing problems. The flight across the Atlantic however would be at low altitude, and the heater added weight and stole power3 . Lindy did in fact encounter performance problems on his cross-country flight, and after a discussion with Wright mechanics at Roosevelt Field, decided to allow them to install a heater wired permanently in the "on" position. "There may have been pros and cons on this arrangement," Ev Cassagneres notes, "But it may have been one of the secrets between success and failure." Like so many other things� Click on Picture to enlarge A view of the left side of the cockpit. Just forward of the instrument panel sits the massive 209 gallon main gas tank. The control stick is visible just beneath the window frame and just in front of it sits the triangular-shaped trim adjustment lever. To the rear of the stick sits the throttle lever, and below that, the Earth Inductor Compass controller. One of the least important features of the plane, but perhaps its most recognizable, was a happy accident. The Ryan Airlines factory burnished the cowlings of both the M-1 and M-2 with an intricate swirling pattern consisting of overlapped circles known as "engine turn". Thus the plane's six-piece cowling, held together by rivets and pins to allow quick access to the engine, received this jeweled finish as well. Upon it was painted "Spirit of St. Louis". That phrase, borrowed from a 1922 movie highlighting the city's achievements, honored Lindbergh's Missouri-based financial backers. It would soon be known the world over. Famously, the plane had no forward windscreen. As with all aspects of the craft's design, function dictated form. The elimination of front-looking windows and the addition of streamlined fairings and the enclosed cockpit all cut down on drag. But beyond that, the design was more or less necessitated by having the main gas tanks sit in front of the pilot rather than behind him. Initially, Hall expressed concern over the arrangement, since it increased the chance of an accidental collision with electrical wires, buildings or terrain, and could make for difficult landings. Yet Lindbergh remained unmoved. He'd flown many airplanes with impaired forward visibility - as had Hall. For landing, both knew Lindy could use the left or right cabin window to line up with a runway, and then side-slip. Most of the time the forward view wouldn't matter anyway, since Lindy'd be flying by instrument. Click on Picture to enlarge An early view of the instrument panel. It might appear rudimentary, but in 1927 it could be considered advanced. The instruments include: (l to r): fuel mixture lever, magneto switch, (top) Earth Inductor Compass indicator, (lower row) turn and bank indicator, (top) altimeter, (lower) air speed indicator, and 8-day clock. The center glass gauge is an inclinometer. The tube at the far right is Lindbergh's "Econometer", which never worked and was removed prior to the transatlantic attempt. Several other items were added later, including oil pressure and temperature gauges. At bottom are visible the series of valves used to route gas from various tanks. Nevertheless, the notion that Lindbergh would be "flying blind" must have been a keen topic of conversation at the Ryan factory's water cooler. By happenstance a worker named Albert Randolph had experience aboard submarines and suggested that the plane be outfitted with a periscope. That concept eventually took the form of a telescoping box which provided a view out of the left side of the forward fuselage. Lindbergh and Hall initially felt the concept far-fetched, but once they saw the finished device it quickly gained their adherence. During test flights Lindy discovered he could easily steer and comfortably hold a course with the aid of the device, and he became a true believer. According to Cassagneres, Hall exploited the rearwards cockpit design by placing the oil tank in between the cockpit and fuel tank as a firewall. An added and perhaps unexpected bonus was that the longer distance from the massive engine likely increased the accuracy of certain delicate instruments. The panel included an air speed indicator, bank and turn indicator, oil pressure and temperature gauges, a clock, a fuel pressure gauge, a tachometer, altimeter, and a liquid magnetic compass. Also on board was an Earth Inductor Compass - a brand new invention which although not infallible provided a fair level of accuracy for its day. One item the aircraft lacked were fuel gauges. Lindy refused to allow Hall to install them, insisting that they would only add unwanted weight. Besides he believed he could measure consumption more accurately using a piece of paper, the on-board clock and a device scratch built by Lindbergh called an "Econometer." (According to Ty Sundstrom, similar devices were in use aboard military aircraft, but when Lindy learned how expensive they were he decided he could save some money by building his own.) Alas, his design failed to work and the apparatus ended up being removed before the record flight. No problem, though: Lindy made do with a watch, a pen and a pad of paper instead. From the pilot's seat fuel could be routed from any one of five tanks - in the final design the forward tank held 88 gallons, a main fuel tank 209, and three wing tanks held 153 for a total of 450 gallons -- through a series of valves located below the instrument panel. Fuel trim was adjusted in flight through the use of a hand-powered wobble pump, which also served as a back-up in case of a main pump failure. Fuel would be moved into the wing tanks, and then gravity fed into the engine. Click on Picture to enlarge Detail shot showing the tailskid and the bungee cord to which it was attached. Because it had to absorb a tremendous amount of shock, the tailskid was constructed of special heat-treated steel also used for the wheel axles. A single, simple wicker pilot's seat, appropriate to Lindbergh's stature, dominated the cockpit. The stick and rudder occupied standard positions, with the wobble pump and trim levers sitting on the left wall near the window. Just to the rear sat the throttle and spark advance lever. Should the engine fail in flight, Lindy had only one option: staying with the plane. He refused to consider taking a heavy parachute, or waste space and valuable weight on a radio or night flying equipment. He did, however, pack some survival supplies and a small rubber raft. Bold as his venture might be, he knew far too well the wages of arrogance to neglect these essentials. Over the decades, a mythology has certainly developed that the NYP plane Donald Hall built was little more than a "flying gas tank." In some sense of the statement this is true of course, but it belittles the sophisticated nature of the enterprise and the approach taken to meet it. Every component on the aircraft was strictly scrutinized to eliminate mass and ensure reliability. All things met rigid criteria. According to Cassagneres, the gas tanks themselves were no exception to this rule. Assembled by hand, they underwent a painfully thorough inspection procedure intended to find bad rivets or handling damage which could promote the formation of leaks. Finally, in an effort to avoid chafing, minimize vibration and maximize capacity, Hall's design placed each tank precisely into the airframe with the main tank having only about 1/8th inch of clearance on either side of the fuselage frame. Such a commitment to detail put a strain on the Ryan workers. "The only good natured grumbling I've heard," Lindbergh wrote later, "was when Hall sent down drawings that called for the fuselage fairings to an accuracy of one thirty-second of an inch. Then Superintendent Bert Tindale remarked that he'd never before been asked to hold such accuracy. But I saw him working there the rest of the afternoon�" Despite Hall's best efforts, the shifting nature of the design and the lack of standard blueprints sometimes caused him to miscalculate. Hall initially estimated desired fuel capacity with safety factor at 380 gallons. Then, apparently at Lindbergh's insistence he revised that figure to 425 gallons. Yet as Ty Sundstrom notes, the finished plane somehow ended up with a 450 gallon capacity. Click on Picture to enlarge This photo shows the 210-gallon main fuel tank built for the Japanese copy of Lindbergh's plane. Made from soft tin steel, it was constructed with baffles (detail) to minimize sloshing. The tank for the SOSL was larger than any ever built at Ryan, and employees initially speculated it was being constructed for use on a boat. (Note cut-outs visible at top of tank to accommodate pilot's feet). The landing gear also testify to Hall's commitment to design detail. Desperate to eliminate weight and drag, Lindbergh and Hall considered many options, including equipping the plane with detachable wheels similar to those used on Orteig competitor Capt. Charles Nungesser's White Bird4 . True, this type of arrangement would save a great deal of weight in flight, and in theory Lindbergh only had to make one landing, but what if he had to turn back after ditching the gear? In the end a more conventional approach prevailed and Hall went with his original impulse, which was to copy a highly stable design employed by Fokker. Hall moved the wheels out of the slipstream, and spread the bearing loads through the fuselage and wing. The gear and tail strut relied on sets of thick but lightweight bungee cords for shock absorption. While Donald Hall and his colleagues struggled to assemble his aircraft, Charles Lindbergh installed himself at a drafting table in Hall's office and pored over navigational charts purchased during a trip to San Pedro. Most of his efforts of course focused around the Atlantic flight although at one point, sensing that a competitor might beat him to Paris, he considered a possible Pacific flight from San Diego to Japan. Click on Picture to enlarge Visible in this view: the Wright J-5C engine, the forward 88-gallon fuel tank, and the 27-gallon oil tank. The cowling on the plane has yet to be installed. The fuel lines leading from the tanks have clearly been segmented to prevent vibration and expansion/contraction damage. The fairings for the landing gear have yet to be installed, along with the propeller, spinner, and oh yes, the wing Although he had demonstrated uncanny skill as a pilot, could maintain a course better than most, and was among the first to fly by instrument, Lindbergh knew the Paris flight would tax his abilities. His navigational problems were not small ones. Hall wrote that "during four weeks practically all (Lindy's) waking hours were occupied by (the) study of navigation and the preparation of charts and data for use in a dead reckoning flight." Despite his considerable experience as an Air Mail pilot, Lindbergh actually had little technical knowledge of navigation except what he'd learned in the Army. Through a dedicated course of study using books from the San Diego Public Library and elsewhere, and attention paid to a "great circle route" guide printed on one of his charts, Lindbergh's knowledge grew and his plans gradually coalesced into a "curving, polygonic line, cutting fearlessly over thousands of miles of continent and ocean." Lindy's studiousness gave him enough confidence that, as Scott Berg wrote, he felt no need to bring a heavy radio or "even a sextant for further navigation". Either would have had serious shortcomings: the radios of the day lacked range, and there is no way to effectively use a sextant while at the same time flying a plane! Whenever time allowed, Lindbergh tried to keep up his flying skills, touring Southern California in one of the Ryan company's monoplanes, and traveling to Los Angeles to pick up needed items. Since most of the craft Lindy had flown for the Air Mail had been bi-planes, the monoplane flights also provided some valuable experience. According to Ty Sundstrom, who has studied Charles Lindbergh's correspondence from his time in San Diego, Lindy actually spent far more time away from the hectic scene at Ryan than he let on in his memoirs. A little wanderlust is understandable, as Lindy certainly understood he might perish as a result of his venture. Regardless, at some point he returned to Ryan Airlines and rejoined Hall. Douglas Corrigan, a Ryan mechanic who later earned the famous "Wrong Way" nickname, remembered that "Lindbergh was around the plant every day showing the mechanics how he wanted certain parts put in and checking over the load factors and estimated performance figures�" Under ordinary circumstances the presence of such an overseer might have upset the staff, but Lindy's affable manner reportedly put everyone at ease. He had already earned the loyalty and admiration of the workers, and benefited from their hard work. Many of the employees toiled into the wee hours without added pay simply because they recognized that the future of the company - and the course of history -- hung in the balance. Click on Picture to enlarge On April 26, the fuselage of the NYP plane was hauled from the Ryan factory to the airfield at Dutch Flats for final assembly. Here, the plane passes Juniper Street attached to the rear of Claude Ryan's Studebaker. The car in the rear is probably Donald Hall's Buick. The strange-looking wheels on the aircraft are temporaries rigged up for the move. One of the last components to be finished was the plane's long, one-piece wing. It was the most labor-intensive structure on the aircraft, and work began upon it even before Lindbergh arrived in San Diego to sign the contract. To further speed up assembly, or simply because it was handy, Hall borrowed the rib design from the M-2.5 That was where any similarity more or less ended. Thanks to a series of tapered spar caps that allowed for a reduction in cross section, the NYP plane's wing could carry a great deal of gas, yet as Ty Sundstrom points out, it weighed less than the M-2's wing while being 10' longer. It also had specially designed wing tips shaped so as to minimize drag. The end product cast the form of a Clark "Y" airfoil, and was actually one of the few components that ended up on something remotely resembling a fully-detailed blueprint. For the most part, Hall relied on his agile memory and a series of rough sketches to keep the design straight - there apparently just wasn't time to make normal schematics. On one occasion, trying to keep a step ahead of the factory workers, Hall sketched for over thirty-six hours non-stop at his drawing board. It was a feat Lindbergh might have regarded with more than passing interest. He'd after all have to match Hall's wakefulness, and then some, to fulfill his end of the bargain. The efforts made by the staff at Ryan cannot be underestimated, either. Well versed in the assembly of aircraft and the improvisational skill required to construct a flight-worthy plane with a paucity of direction, they proved more than capable. The burden placed on Bowlus, Morrow, Tindale and their underlings was obviously tremendous, especially given the lack of conventional schematics and the short schedule. Lindbergh gave them all the credit in the world, noting that "Each of them is striving to do a quicker and better job on the Spirit of St. Louis than he's done before. No pains are too great, and no hours too long; lights sometimes burn in the factory all through the night." Click on Picture to enlarge There was a bit of hand wringing when it was discovered that the wing would not fit through the door of the factory's second-story assembly room. Fortunately, it would fit out one of the veranda-type windows. Using a handy box-car as a platform, the staff was able to get the wing outside. Then a derrick, visible to the far left, placed the wing into the bed of the truck visible in the foreground. The NYP plane's big wing produced a rather amusing episode. After the span was fully assembled, the realization took hold that it was too big to maneuver out the door of the workshop. The room sat on the second floor loft of the factory, which made the situation all that more tricky. A quick examination of the available options, which included widening the egress with a sledge hammer, revealed that the wing might just fit out one of the second floor's full-height windows. Beneath the window ran a railroad spur, and the wing was therefore moved out of the window onto the roof of a handy box car borrowed for the occasion. It was then moved to a truck with the aid of a small crane. Fortunately, the entire harrowing maneuver went off without a hitch. On April 25, at two o'clock in the morning, factory work was pronounced complete on the plane. By now it had an official license number from the new Aeronautics Branch of the Department of Commerce: N-X-211 (N designating United States, X for experimental). Remarkably, only fifty-nine days had elapsed from the date the order for the plane had been placed. But there was no time to celebrate. The plane was cautiously towed a couple miles to Dutch Flats, a field on the edge of San Diego which the company used for testing, and the wing bolted on. A little while later, a Standard Steel Propeller was attached along with an "engine turned" spinner. On the 28th, Lindbergh attempted his first flight. With the entire factory staff looking on, the engine was hand propped by a couple employees, including Corrigan. The plane's J-5C responded, and moments later the wheel chocks were removed and Lindy taxied down the muddy field and took off. With only fifty gallons of gas aboard, the plane left the ground in just over six seconds and less than 100 feet. It accelerated faster than anything Lindbergh had ever flown, and he marveled at it. After checking that his instruments were working he buzzed the Ryan factory and then headed out over San Diego Bay. On the way, he proceeded to run some tests, put the plane into a stall, and couldn't resist the temptation to open up the throttle. The airspeed indicator quickly hit 128 mph and he backed off. When a Navy Hawk appeared from the nearby military field, Lindy engaged in some unplanned maneuvers. He banked towards the fighter and engaged in a mock dogfight, noting with satisfaction that although the Navy plane was faster, his craft could turn in a shorter radius. Then he called it quits and returned to Dutch Flats, performing a few more stalls along the way. All in all the plane had performed well, despite the expected stability issues.6 Click on Picture to enlarge With a heave-ho, the forty-six foot long wing is hoisted into position. The skylight in the center of the wing is clearly visible. Douglas "Wrong Way" Corrigan stands just in front of the tail feathers. Lindbergh is the fifth person from the left. Presumably Donald Hall is also in the photo. Possibly that's him immediately adjacent to the aircraft on the right side, hand just grazing the skylight Even though it only lasted twenty minutes, the first flight was a triumph for everyone concerned. A celebratory photo was snapped after it ended. Lined up under the wings of the plane, the exhausted factory workers, B.F. Mahoney and Donald Hall could take some satisfaction. But all present that day knew that for Lindbergh the journey had in a real sense just begun. In front of him lay a destiny they could no longer directly affect. They had done their best. Now everything was up to the young pilot. Ten days after test flights commenced, Lindbergh left San Diego and flew cross-country to St. Louis, and from there on to Curtiss Field, New York. The staff at Ryan, like everyone around the nation, monitored Lindy's attempt, and the celebration in San Diego when he succeeded was as raucous as anywhere in the world. "When the news reached San Diego," remembered Douglas Corrigan, "the whole town went wild because the people knew the plane was a local product. All the fellows from the factory and the field jumped into cars and rode through the streets waving and shouting." From a human and an engineering standpoint the achievement was wholly remarkable. Even for the modest Hall, the sense of accomplishment must have been terrific. He'd been part of an incredible venture, and the craft he'd supervised had performed in spectacular fashion. According to the press reports, when Lindy had landed in Paris he'd had enough fuel aboard to have flown onwards, perhaps even as far as Rome. Donald Hall and B.F. Mahoney were invited to attend the festivities welcoming Lindbergh back to New York in June, and were there when Lindy received the Orteig Prize for which he'd worked so long and hard, and for which he'd risked so much. The press of course idolized the tall, handsome, brave pilot they dubbed "Lucky Lindy". Some attention was directed to others involved in the effort, but the monumentality of Lindbergh's efforts meant that he inevitably received the lion's share of the laurels. Ev Cassagneres believes that Donald Hall's achievement in designing and building a groundbreaking aircraft was overlooked. "Lindbergh became a household word, an American hero, and still admired around the world, even up to the present time," he says. "Donald A. Hall however, never did receive the acclaim he most certainly deserved for the part he played in the success of the flight." Click on Picture to enlarge Spirit, seen from the right side. The single cockpit door is clearly visible. The small protuberance about midway down the tail is a wind-driven generator for the Earth Inductor Compass. The craft measured just under 28 feet long, from spinner to tail. It might have looked like an all-metal design, but of course the fairings were made of balsa, and much of the exterior was covered with aluminum-painted cotton fabric. When Lindy landed at Le Bourget Field, Paris, exuberant crowds tore off swaths of fabric and broke stringers in the fuselage before gendarmes intervened. Others such as John Underwood differ, noting that while Hall's efforts were certainly diligent, they should not be considered revolutionary. "Donald Hall was no more than a competent engineer and what he did was not particularly brilliant from an engineering standpoint," he notes. Ty Sundstrom concurs, suggesting that while the Spirit was unique, its design could not be considered state of the art for 1927 and, by most measures, it was in fact obsolete. "Even Charles Lindbergh said later that the best aircraft for the flight was the Wright-Bellanca," he notes. "The Spirit was actually (based on) an outdated design that was revamped to make it across the Atlantic. It was built to the slimmest of safety margins and needed every effort to make it successful." In Sundstrom's estimation, Hall's most important accomplishment lies in something largely overlooked over the years, namely his determined effort to streamline an existing design and effectively increase the craft's range. An important achievement that paid significant dividends, but not an extraordinary one by any measure. For Nova Hall, the debate surrounding his grandfather's role is somewhat moot. "The fact that we're even having a debate is what's important," he notes. "For so many years my grandfather's role was minimized by Ryan (and B.F. Mahoney). His name was hardly mentioned." Since discovering the trunk full of photographs, Nova has written a book about his grandfather and feels he's come to know him in the process. "I'm now an expert on my grandfather, who he was, what he did, and that's what my book is about - the mysterious man behind Lindbergh, " he says. "The man I never met, but whom I cherish for who he was." Among the photos Nova discovered in his grandfather's trunk, is one that shows him at the controls of a tandem wing plane. This is the Hall Aeronautical Development X-1, which he designed after leaving Mahoney-Ryan Airlines in 1929. The plane represented Donald Hall's second chance for public acclaim. Touted in the press as "a fast, highly maneuverable" aircraft, it apparently had less than spectacular performance characteristics. Lindbergh flew it during a trip to San Diego, and while his reaction was not recorded he apparently did not endorse it or choose to invest in it. The plane never shed its experimental designation, and the Great Depression soon forced the company to close its doors. A disappointed Donald Hall struggled for a time, and then eventually resumed his design career working for a series of companies including Convair, where he helped design the B-24 Liberator. Thus in some respects, building the Spirit proved to be the high water mark of his career. If there was any bitterness between Donald Hall and Charles Lindbergh over the X-1, it was likely never discussed. The two friends kept in touch over the years, according to Nova Hall, maintaining a cordial correspondence and occasionally visiting one another. Perhaps on one of those visits they reminisced about the day, May 3, 1927 -- just before Lindy flew the Spirit from San Diego to St. Louis and on to glory -- when the pilot invited the designing engineer to ride in the cramped cockpit of the NYP plane. The sun ducked in and out of a light fog that day as Lindy put the aircraft through its paces, letting Hall handle the stick briefly so as to get a sense of the stability issues produced by the insufficiently large tail. True, the plane had some eccentricities, but it seemed to fly marvelously well. 1. Levine later recruited pilot Clarence Chamberlin, and became a serious contender in the Orteig race. Two weeks after Lindy made history, the pair broke his distance record by flying the Bellanca from New York to Germany. The same plane would make history again a short time later by becoming the first to cross the Atlantic a second time. 2. According to Sundstrom, the real reason for the arrangement may have been far more mundane. "Lindbergh and Hall said they designed the plane so he'd sit in the rear, behind the fuel tanks, for safety," Sundstrom says. "But the truth is the seat was located in the rear to provide for proper balance, by putting the fuel near the center of gravity. All previous Ryan planes had the same configuration." 3. John Underwood notes that, while flying as an Air Mail pilot, Lindy learned how to clear carburetor ice by deliberately backfiring the engine. Certainly he was no stranger to the phenomenon and could have dealt with any problems on the NYP plane in similar fashion. 4. The plane and crew disappeared during an attempted Atlantic crossing just days after the NYP's first flight. 5. The wing ribs may not have been the only significant component to be assembled prior to the contract being signed. According to Ty Sundstrom, parts of the plane may have been constituted from some pre-fabricated elements built and stored at the Ryan factory. 6. Although it is recounted in his book The Spirit of St. Louis, some believe Lindy's dogfight story to be apocryphal.   Click on Picture to enlarge Handsome shots of the left side of the plane. The top image clearly shows the position of the periscope. Lindbergh was initially skeptical of the viewing device, but allowed it to be installed after Hall assured him it would have only a small impact on the plane's aerodynamics. It worked well, allowing Lindy to see forward without having to lean to one side of the cockpit. Yet he used it only minimally, mostly at low altitude to sight smokestacks and other obstacles. He never used it for takeoff and landing - that would have been, in his words, "impracticable."     Detail shot showing the "engine turn" covered cowling and spinner, the nine-foot diameter Standard steel propeller, the air-cooled J-5C engine, and Fokker-type landing gear. The slightly blunted spinner seen in this photo was replaced in New York with a much more aerodynamic design, which lacked the engine turn finish.   April 28, 1927. With a roar, the Spirit of St. Louis takes off on its maiden flight. Lindbergh was heartened at the acceleration produced by the J-5C, which had him and 50 gallons of gas off the ground in less than 100 feet. A few minutes later, Lindy buzzed the Ryan factory. Note lack of fairings over the plane's landing gear shock mounts. They wouldn't be added until after the initial flight. Assembled in this group photo is the team that built the plane that made history. Hall is fourth from the right; Lindbergh is visible just to the left of the propeller wearing a borrowed hat. Women employees were not uncommon at aircraft manufacturers in this era - at Ryan they sewed all the fabric. Note the cowling cover on the ground at the right side of the image.     Both Lindbergh and Hall felt that fuel load tests should be conducted with the Spirit, but the short runway at Dutch Flats made that a risky undertaking. The group moved to the ample-sized parade grounds at Camp Kearney, near San Diego, and Lindy flew with fuel loads up to and a little over the 300 gallon mark. At that point the risk of accident on the rock-strewn field was felt to be too great, and the tests discontinued.   A somewhat controversial photo, shot (depending on who you talk to) either by Donald Hall during a trip aloft with Lindbergh on May 3rd, or by "Jimmy" Erickson on May 5th. Undoubtedly it was one of the first photos ever taken from the Spirit. According to his grandson Nova, Donald Hall sat on the armrest of Lindy's pilot seat while aloft so he could study the instrument panel, and Lindy briefly yielded the stick at altitude so that the designing engineer could get a sense of the plane's stability issues. On May 10, Lindbergh began the first leg of his cross-country odyssey. In this photo, Lindbergh poses next to Hall while the plane is fueled using jerry cans and a funnel. About 250 gallons were loaded for the trip. (Photo Courtesy Ryan Aeronautical Company via Ev Cassagneres)   Raymond Orteig Offers A $25,00 Prtize   Charles Lindbergh receiving the Orteig Prize from Raymond Orteig Raymond Orteig emigrated to New York from France in 1912. He worked as a bus boy and caf� manager and eventually acquired two New York Hotels which were popular with French airmen assigned to duty in the United States during the Great War In 1919 Raymond Orteig offered a prize of $25,000 for the first nonstop aircraft flight between New York and Paris. By the mid 1920�s, airplanes had finally developed enough to make such a flight possible. The first aviators to go for the prize paid with their lives. Others were still willing to take the chance and Roosevelt Field became their headquarters. Several famous aviators arrived at the field and the public followed their plans with intense interest. Then in May, 1927, a new plane quietly flew in from the west. An unknown, young, airmail pilot, Charles Lindbergh, had arrived. At 7.52 AM, May 20th, 1927 a small single-engine aircraft took off from Roosevelt Field, Long Island. 33 � hours later, on May 21st, the same aircraft landed at Le Bourget Airport, Paris. At the controls of the Ryan monoplace named Spirit of St Louis, a 25-year-old mail pilot, Captain Charles Lindbergh. On August 31st, 1927 the F�d�ration A�ronautique Internationale (FAI) ratified Lindbergh's performance as the new World Record for non-stop flight. Certification of Charles Lindbergh's flight required several documents to prove the performance Orteig Prize check made out to Charles Lindbergh The F�d�ration A�ronautique Internationale (FAI) - the World Air Sports Federation - is the sole organisation authorized to certify aeronautical and astronautical world records worlwide. The certification of Charles Lindbergh's flight required several documents to prove the performance. A sealed barograph, an instrument working with atmospheric pressure, was loaded on the aircraft; its six-hour cylinder recorded the altitudes flown and proved that the flight was uninterrupted. The start of the flight was attested by the US National Aeronautic Association and the Proc�s-verbal established by the A�ro-Club de France on Lindbergh's arrival attested that the barograph was found sealed and reported that 322 litres of gas (85 gallons) remained in the sealed tanks. This Proc�s-verbal was signed by no less than 13 French officials, the US Ambassador Myron Herrick, the Belgian Air Attach� Willy Coppens and, of course Charles Lindbergh himself. Finally, the FAI General Secretary Paul Tissandier informed the National Aeronautic Association on August 31st, 1927, that Lindbergh's flight was certified as the Class-C World Record for non-stop flight over a distance of 5809 kilometres".   The Wright Wirlwind 1919 - 1927  By William Wraga   When Wright Aeronautical was incorporated in 1919, its charter was the design and manufacture of aero engines. During the war, as Wright-Martin, they had done an outstanding job with the Hispano-Suiza, greatly improving its design, mastering its very difficult manufacture and even expanding the engine to a V-12. The Wright brothers were no longer involved with the company. Wilbur had died, and Orville had other interests, but it can be said that Wright Aeronautical engine tradition began with the first Wright brothers' engine in 1903. In the early 1920's they were still building the Hisso in small quantities for military planes, a large 6-cylinder for Navy dirigibles and a 500 HP successor to the Liberty. Wright also made a tentative entry into the marine engine field. Manufacturing had moved to more modest facilities in Paterson, New Jersey. Wright Wirlwind J-5C The aero engine business was not good then; the market was glutted with Curtiss Jennys which the Army sold for about $400, engine and all. Further, the preferred military engine was Curtiss' remarkable D-12. Wright even built a few racers that competed unsuccessfully with Curtiss machines. These were the last Wright airplanes. Wright Aeronautical was moving in many directions and needed a specific "work package". Most engines of the period were water-cooled and suffered frequent cooling system failures. Radiators came apart; porous engine castings, lines, hoses and gaskets leaked. Failure rates were of great concern, particularly to the Navy where over-water flying was more hazardous. Wright did some work with air-cooled engines for the Army, but little came of this. The Lawrance Aero Engine Corporation bore the name of its owner, Charles J. Lawrance, an engineer devoted to the development of air-cooled radial engines. He had started the development of a series of promising engine designs and demonstrated a working model to the Navy. The Navy quickly promoted a union between Lawrance and Wright, he providing technical leadership and Wright its formidable financial, engineering and manufacturing resources. Wright bought his company and installed him as Chief Engineer, starting what would be their principal business for the next 40 years. Lawrance's most advanced design was his model J-5, an engine that Wright undertook to fully develop. Lawrance had the mechanical design of the J-5 right--but not cylinder head cooling. Radials had been built in England for some time, and air-cooled types and some viable designs were produced. Fortuitously, an Englishman, Samuel D. Heron, an engineer with wide experience in cooling English radials, was consulting at Wright Field at the time and was asked to help with the J-5. His redesign of cylinder head fin configuration made the engine a jewel. Charles A. Lindbergh and the J-5C powered Spirit of St. Louis. The engine was standard except for the replacement of 18 manually lubed rocker arms grease fittings with automatic spring and plunger types. Courtesy of National Air and Space Museum The engine was the J-5C Whirlwind. It displaced 778 inches with 9 cylinders; was light at 510 lbs.; had no water-cooling appurtenances. It was simple and easily maintained; its cooling was so efficient that it could be operated with a lean air/fuel mixture, almost unheard of then, since rich mixtures were usually necessary to help cooling. The Whirlwind developed 220 HP at 1800 rpm, a low speed that contributed to its reliability. It had one fault, which was not important or even recognized at the time--its large frontal area would produce excessive drag, but airplanes were slow then, and engine drag was not an important factor. Wright Aeronautical now had a first-class product and looked for a way to advertise the engine and show it to the world. Guiseppe Bellanca was a Sicilian immigrant living with his brother in Brooklyn. He was an engineer whose passion was aerodynamics; he built an airplane in their backyard and taught himself to fly. Over several years he designed and built a line of airplanes, paying close attention to every detail of aerodynamics and streamlining. Fuselages were airfoil shapes producing lift (like today's lifting bodies); struts, braces and landing gear were carefully shaped. He calculated thin-wing airfoils that were years ahead of their time, carrying test samples from Brooklyn to Manhattan on the trolley to a wind tunnel at NYU. His airplanes were strong and light, highly maneuverable and airworthy. Barnstorming pilots of the day itched to get their hands on a Bellanca. In the early 1920's Bellancas won more prizes at air meets than any other type. Wright contracted with Bellanca to build an airplane tailored to the J-5C. The resulting machine, the Wright-Bellanca WB-2, is considered to be a benchmark airplane of American aviation. It was soon jointly flown by famous aviators Clarence Chamberlin and Bert Acosta and set new endurance records. Charles A. Lindbergh was planning his solo flight, New York to Paris. He tried to buy the Bellanca but was considered to be an unreliable barnstormer. Instead the plane was sold to a New York businessman who planned to make the Paris flight together with Chamberlin as pilot. The plane was then named Columbia. The Columbia was temporarily grounded over a legal hassle and lost the chance to be first. It made the flight shortly after Lindbergh with Berlin as its objective, but landed short because of bad weather, still outdistancing Lindbergh by about 300 miles. Lindbergh's story is aviation history. He got his airplane from Ryan in San Diego, fitted with a J-5C. He was first and alone. Lindbergh's flight was an international triumph for Wright Aeronautical. Both Whirlwind engines never missed a beat. Lindbergh's feat made the J-5C the most popular engine for long distance air travel. Soon more flights were made to Europe, to the North and South poles and across the Pacific with Whirlwind power. Wrights' board of directors was content to rest on its laurels and bank the profits from burgeoning J-5 sales, but their engineers were already anxious to build the next radial in the 400 HP range. Reluctant to spend additional investment funds, Wright lost key engineering people who signed up with a machine shop in Hartford, CT, Pratt & Whitney, and put them in the engine business. Their first engine was another jewel, forcing Wright to compete, a competition that lasted until the introduction of the jet engine. The J-5C Whirlwind was the progenitor of all the great radials that came afterwards. On the surface, the future of the radial engine looked bright, but the airframers knew that if speeds were to increase, the problem of drag had to be addressed. Initially, since the engine was air-cooled, it seemed correct to place as much of it in the airstream as possible. The Ryan and Bellanca were built that way. Click on Picture to enlarge 28 May 1927 presented to Tom Rutledge by Wright Aernatical Corporation.     Wright factory photo of J-5C�s being assembled. Taken in the 1927/1928 timeframe,the same production line/area Lindbergh�s engine was made. Tom Rutledge second engine builder from right (1927 or 1928) View from other angle (may be slightly earlier time period, hard to say) (1927 or 1928)   Wright factory photo of J-5C�s being assembled. Parts area NACA systematically  experimented with ways to reduce radial engine drag. They developed cowlings tailored to each engine and airframe that faired with the fuselage and smoothed airflow through and around the engine. These cowlings were also rudimentary ramjets, fueled by engine heat, producing a small thrust to help overcome drag. Although radial-powered airplanes would never be streamlined as well as their in-line counterparts, NACA cowlings improved the performance of radial-powered airplanes sufficiently to insure the future of the large radials to come. Charles A. Lindbergh and the J-5C powered Spirit of St. Louis. The engine was standard except for the replacement of 18 manually lubed rocker arms grease fittings with automatic spring and plunger types. Courtesy of National Air and Space Museum [Reprinted with permission from the Curtiss-Wright Corporation. By William Wraga]  

Spirit of St. Louis

Once known as book rate, what USPS service is reserved for printed materials, cds, and video tapes?

New Page 2 lick on Picture to enlarge Boyhood home of Charles Lindbergh. Aerial view of Charles Lindbergh's plane taking off. Aerial view of Charles Lindbergh's plane in flight. Four sailors pose with the Spirit of St. Louis, June 12, 1927. Charles Lindbergh poses by his airplane. Col. Lindbergh's Spirit of St. Louis, on the U.S. Navy barge, off Hains Point, Washington, D.C. Charles Lindbergh's Sirius plane on the Yangtze River in China, 1931. As chief pilot of Robertson Aircraft Corporation, Charles Lindbergh was given the honor of inaugurating the first flight on April 15, 1926, from Chicago's Maywood Field to St. Louis, stopping to pick up mail in Peoria and Springfield, Illinois. While growing up on a farm near the small midwestern town of Twin Falls, Minnesota, Charles Lindbergh was fascinated by speed. As a teenager, the thin, socially awkward young man acquired a motorcycle, which he raced around town, testing the limits of his courage--and honing his skills at the controls of a speeding machine. Two years after enrolling at the University of Wisconsin to study mechanical engineering, the 20-year-old Lindbergh dropped out and began a life of aerial adventure. He toured the country with a veteran barnstormer who taught him how to wing-walk and parachute jump. In 1923, Lindbergh borrowed $500 from his father and bought a World War One surplus Curtiss "Jenny" biplane, in which he finally made his first solo flight. Although just 22 years old, Lindbergh was already a skilled pilot when he enlisted in the Army Air Service in 1924. A year later, he graduated from flight training school in San Antonio at the top of his class. After completing his army service, he took a job as chief pilot with the Robertson Aircraft Corporation in St. Louis, inaugurating a commercial airmail route between that city and Chicago. By his mid-twenties, Lindbergh had logged hundreds of hours in the air and been forced to parachute to safety at least four times. Still, the fearless young flyer's greatest--and most dangerous--adventure was yet to come. In 1919, Raymond Orteig, a New York hotel-owner, had offered $25,000 to the first aviator to fly nonstop from New York to Paris. Eight years later, with the prize money still unclaimed, Lindbergh persuaded nine St. Louis businessmen to share the $10,580 cost of custom-building an airplane, expressly to go after it. He named the Ryan Aeronautical Company's M-2 strut-based monoplane The Spirit of St. Louis . About two hours after sunrise on May 20, 1927, Lindbergh taxied his small, single-engine aircraft down the rainy runway at Long Island's Roosevelt Field. It was so loaded down with fuel that it almost touched the trees and telephone wires near the field during its 7:52 a.m. takeoff. Using a magnetic compass to navigate, the 25-year-old aviator--dubbed "the Flying Kid" or "the Flying Fool" by a skeptical press corps--charted a course north-northeast over the Atlantic. Nearly a day later, with great relief, Lindbergh spotted the southwestern coast of Ireland. He flew over the British Commonwealth republic, then over England and the English Channel. Thirty-three and one-half hours and 3,610 miles (5,810 kilometers) after leaving New York, Lindbergh made aviation history when he landed at Le Bourget field near Paris at 10:21 p.m. The exhausted young flyer was instantly mobbed by thousands of jubilant admirers from whom he literally had to be rescued by French police. After being feted by British and European monarchs, Lindbergh returned to New York, where he received a hero's welcome from four million people. In Washington, President Calvin Coolidge awarded Lindbergh the first-ever Distinguished Flying Cross. The U.S. Congress presented him with the Congressional Medal of Honor. He was promoted from lieutenant to colonel in the Army Air Corps reserves. For the next five years, "Lucky Lindy" or "the Lone Eagle," as Lindbergh now was known to an adoring public, continued to live a hero's life. He flew the Spirit of St. Louis to all 48 states to promote the neophyte commercial aviation industry, then took it on a goodwill tour of Latin America. During a stopover in Mexico City, he was hosted by U.S. Ambassador Dwight Morrow. Lindbergh was smitten by the wealthy man's shy, beautiful 21-year-old daughter, Anne. They were married in May 1929. Lindbergh taught his bride to fly. Together, they charted new commercial aviation routes, including the Great Circle-Polar route to China and West Africa to Brazil. In June 1930 their first child, Charles Augustus Lindbergh, Jr., was born. Respected and adulated by millions, Charles and Anne Lindbergh were living what seemed a fairy-tale perfect life. Less than two years later, however, America's Golden Couple was visited by tragedy. Bruno Hauptmann, a German immigrant carpenter, kidnapped Charles Jr. from their suburban New Jersey home. Although a ransom was demanded and paid, the Lindbergh's 20-month-old son was never returned and was later found dead. Hauptmann was subsequently arrested, tried, convicted on capital charges, and executed. The kidnapping and murder of the first-born son of America's hero brought wide and sensational press coverage. To escape the unwelcome publicity, Lindbergh moved his family--which now included three-year-old son Jon--to Kent, England. While living in Europe, Lindbergh was invited by the Nazi government to inspect the German aircraft industry, whose size and capabilities for building advanced combat aircraft greatly impressed him. Adolf Hitler awarded the famed American aviator a German medal of honor. Although Lindbergh was harshly criticized by U.S. critics of the Nazi regime, he refused to return the medal, and later described the German dictator as "undoubtedly a great man." In 1941, Lindbergh became a spokesman for the America First movement. He gave speeches and radio broadcasts for the isolationist group, in which he criticized Jews, the British, and supporters of President Franklin D. Roosevelt for allegedly trying to drag the United States into the burgeoning world war. Publicly castigated by the president as a traitor and defeatist, Lindbergh angrily resigned his commission in the Army Air Corps. But after the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor in December 1941, Lindbergh stopped his speechmaking and tried to rejoin the military. Roosevelt blocked the move. However, in 1944, in the guise of civilian test pilot, Lindbergh flew some 50 combat missions over the South Pacific before senior commanders learned of the ruse and grounded him. In May 1945, following the Allied victory in Europe, Lindbergh received a rare chance to officially redeem himself. The U.S. government asked him to once again assess Germany's air capabilities, this time focusing on its V-2 rocket program . Lindbergh gratefully obliged. Aware of Lindbergh's war service and his historic contributions to flight, President Dwight D. Eisenhower later restored Lindbergh's military commission, promoting him to the rank of brigadier general in the U.S. Air Force Reserve. In 1953, Lindbergh published The Spirit of St. Louis. The dramatic account of his historic 1927 flight was awarded the Pulitzer Prize in 1954. In the postwar years, Lindbergh also became a commercial adviser to Pan American World Airways and Boeing Aircraft Corporation and served as a consultant to the air force chief of staff. However, he now kept a low public profile--until the 1960s, when the cause of conservation led him to reenter public life. In July 1964 Lindbergh published an article in the popular magazine Reader's Digest titled "Is Civilization Progress?" in which he emerged as an advocate for conservation. He expressed the belief that the quality of life could be preserved and improved only if technology and conservation were successfully balanced. Traveling round the world, Lindbergh worked to help the indigenous tribes of the Philippines and Africa and to save the humpback and blue whale, which were in danger of extinction. He opposed the development of supersonic passenger aircraft because he feared the effect they would have on the environment. In 1977, on the occasion of the 50th anniversary of his solo flight, the Charles A. Lindbergh Fund was created by friends of Lindbergh at The Explorers Club in New York City. The foundation's mission was both to further Lindbergh's belief in balance between technology and conservation and to honor him as a flyer and for his other aeronautical achievements. In 1994, the name of the foundation was changed to the Charles A. and Anne Morrow Lindbergh Foundation to reflect the couple's shared vision. In 1972, Lindbergh contracted cancer. With his wife Anne at his side, he died on August 26, 1974, on the couple's Hawaiian island retreat at Maui. Although he had chartered new air routes, fathered five children, written books, fought in a war, promoted commercial aviation, global conservation, and U.S. isolationism during an eventful 72 years, in the end none of that mattered as much to the world as the brave and unexpected achievement while an obscure young man. --Jonathan Agronsky "Lindbergh." National Aviation Hall of Fame. http://www.nationalaviation.org/enshrinee/lindberghch.html Additional References: Berg, A. Scott. Lindbergh. New York: G.P. Putnam's Sons, 1998. Davies, R.E.G. Charles Lindbergh, an Airman, His Aircraft, and His Great Flights. McLean, Va.: Paladwr Press, 1997. Gilman. Ted. Lindbergh: The Flight. Vernon Hills, Ill.: Heather Ridge, 1986. Lindbergh, Anne Morrow. North to the Orient. New York: Harcourt Brace, 1935. Lindbergh, Charles. "We." New York: Grosset & Dunlap, 1927. Lindbergh, Charles. The Spirit of St. Louis. New York: Charles Scribner's Sons, 1953. Milton, Joyce. Loss of Eden -- A Biography of Charles and Anne Morrow Lindbergh. New York: HarperCollins Publishers, 1993. Mosely, Leonard. Lindbergh: A Biography. New York: Doubleday, 1976. Nevin, David. The Pathfinders. Alexandria, Va.: Time-Life Books, 1980. Ross, Walter. The Last Hero: Charles A. Lindbergh. New York: Harper & Row, 1964. "The Spirit of St. Louis" in Microsoft's Flight Simulator: http://www.microwings.com/mw_lindy.html. Hall, Donald A. "Technical preparation of the airplane - Spirit of St. Louis." NACA TN 257. July 1927. http://naca.larc.nasa.gov/reports/1927/naca-tn-257/naca-tn-257.pdf.     Charles and Anne Morrow Lindbergh Anne Morrow Lindbergh was the daughter of diplomat Dwight Morrow. According to a Biography Channel profile on Lindbergh, she was the only woman that he had ever asked out on a date. The couple married on May 27, 1929; he taught her how to fly and did much of his exploring and charting of air routes with her. They had six children: Charles Augustus Lindbergh, Jr. (1930�1932); Jon Morrow Lindbergh (b. August 16, 1932); Land Morrow Lindbergh (b. 1937), who studied anthropology at Stanford University and married Susan Miller in San Diego; Anne Lindbergh (1940�1993); Scott Lindbergh (b. 1942); and Reeve Lindbergh (b. 1945), a writer. Click on Picture to enlarge Charles Lindbergh testifies at the murder trial of Bruno Richard Hauptmann, January 1935 Charles Augustus Lindbergh, Jr., 20 months old, was abducted from the Lindbergh home on March 1, 1932. A nationwide, 10-week search ensued, and ransom negotiations were conducted with the kidnappers. An infant corpse was found on May 12 in Hopewell, New Jersey, just a few miles from the Lindberghs' home, and identified by Lindbergh as his son. More than three years later, a media circus ensued when the man accused of the murder, Bruno Richard Hauptmann, went on trial in Flemington, New Jersey, on January 2, 1935. The Lindberghs eventually grew tired of the never ending spotlight on both themselves and their second son, Jon, and decided to move to Britain, sailing furtively from New York for Europe on the SS American Importer in the early morning hours of December 22, 1935.[18] Convicted on February 13, 1935, of the kidnapping and murder after a sensational six week trial, Hauptmann nervertheless always continued to maintain his innocence. Despite a last minute attempt by New Jersey Governor Harold Hoffman (who expressed doubts about his guilt) to get his sentence commuted to life imprisonment, Hauptmann was electrocuted at Trenton State Prison on April 3, 1936.   His Pre-war Activities   In Europe, during the pre-war period, Lindbergh traveled to Germany several times at the behest of the U.S. military, where he reported on German aviation and the German Air Force (Luftwaffe). Lindbergh was intrigued and stated that Germany had taken a leading role in many aviation developments, including metal construction, low-wing designs, dirigibles and diesel engines. Lindbergh also undertook a survey of aviation in the Soviet Union in 1938 and reported to the United States military upon his return from each of these trips. The Lindberghs lived in England and France during the late 1930s in order to find tranquility and avoid the celebrity that followed them everywhere in the United States after the kidnapping trial. Click on Picture to enlarge Lindbergh's German Eagle While living in France, Lindbergh worked with Nobel Prize-winning French surgeon Dr. Alexis Carrel, with whom he had collaborated on earlier projects when the latter lived in the United States. In 1930, Lindbergh's sister-in-law developed a fatal heart condition. Lindbergh began to wonder why no one could repair hearts with surgery. He discovered it was because organs could not be kept alive outside the body, and he set about working on a solution to the problem with Carrel. Lindbergh's invention, a glass perfusion pump, was credited with making future heart surgeries possible.[19] The device in this early stage was far from perfected, however. Although perfused organs were said to have survived surprisingly well, all showed progressive degenerative changes within a few days.[20] Carrel also introduced Lindbergh to eugenics and scientific racism; these ideas significantly influenced Lindbergh's later sympathies with fascist politics and American isolationism, which eventually ruined his public reputation in America.[21] In 1929, Lindbergh became interested in the work of U.S. rocket pioneer Robert Goddard. The following year, Lindbergh helped Goddard secure his first endowment from Daniel Guggenheim, which allowed Goddard to expand his independent research and development. Lindbergh remained a key supporter and advocate of Goddard's work throughout his life. In 1938, Lindbergh and Carrel collaborated on a book, The Culture of Organs, which summarized their work on perfusion of organs outside the body. Lindbergh and Carrel discussed an artificial heart[22] but it was decades before one was actually built. In 1938, the American ambassador to Germany, Hugh Wilson, invited Lindbergh to a dinner with Hermann G�ring at the American embassy in Berlin. The dinner included diplomats and three of the greatest minds of German aviation, Ernst Heinkel, Adolf Baeumaker and Dr. Willy Messerschmitt. G�ring presented Lindbergh with the Commander Cross of the Order of the German Eagle (the Gro�kreuz des Verdienstordens vom Deutschen Adler) for his services to aviation and particularly for his 1927 flight (Henry Ford received the same award earlier in July). Lindbergh's acceptance of the honor later caused an outcry in the United States. Lindbergh declined to return the medal to the Germans because he claimed that to do so would be "an unnecessary insult" to the German Nazi government. He returned to the United States soon after World War II broke out in Europe.   The Munich Crisis   Lindbergh went to Germany at the urgent request of the U.S. military attach� in Berlin, who was charged with learning everything possible about Germany's new warplanes. Thus Lindbergh traveled repeatedly to Germany, touring German aviation facilities, where the Luftwaffe chief tried to convince Lindbergh that the Luftwaffe was far more powerful than it actually was. Lindbergh used his prestige to gain far more knowledge of German warplanes than any other American. As historian Wayne Cole explains: "Of particular importance were the Junkers Ju 88 and, again, the Messerschmitt Bf 109 . With the approval of Goering and Ernst Udet, Lindbergh was the first American permitted to examine the Luftwaffe's newest and best bomber, the Ju 88. And he got the unprecedented opportunity to pilot its finest fighter, the Bf 109. He was highly impressed by both aircraft and knew "of no other pursuit plane which combines simplicity of construction with such excellent performance characteristics" as the Bf 109. In his visits to Germany from 1936 through 1938, Colonel Lindbergh closely inspected all the types of military aircraft that Germany was to use in 1939 and 1940. The Bf 109 and Ju 88 were front line German combat aircraft throughout World War II. And Lindbergh's findings about those various combat aircraft found their way into American air intelligence reports to Washington long before the European war began."[23] At the urging of U.S. Ambassador Joseph Kennedy, Lindbergh wrote a secret memo for the British arguing that if England and France attempted to stop German dictator Adolf Hitler's aggression, it would be military suicide. Some military historians argue that Lindbergh was basically accurate and that his warnings helped save Britain from likely defeat in 1938. Others say that his actions were beneficial to the Third Reich's war effort. There is a case for both of these arguments, since Lindbergh favored a war between Germany and Russia, but deplored the rivalry between Germany and Britain. In Charles A. Lindbergh and the Battle against American Intervention in World War II, Cole explains how Lindbergh was dismayed that pacifism in France had already left that country without a sufficient military and possibly already doomed by 1938, and that Britain had an outdated military still focused on naval power instead of an updated air arsenal to deter the Luftwaffe and force Hitler to turn his ambitions eastward toward a war against "Asiatic Communism". There is some controversy as to how accurate his alarmism concerning the Luftwaffe was, but Cole reports that the consensus among British and American officials was that it was slightly exaggerated but nevertheless badly needed. Lindbergh saw no contradiction between his advocacy of stronger American and British armed forces and diplomatic appeasement of Nazi Germany. "Our civilization depends on peace among Western nations," he wrote in a controversial 1939 Reader's Digest article, "and therefore on united strength, for Peace is a virgin who dare not show her face without Strength, her father, for protection."[24][25]   The Political Allegations Against Lindbergh   Lindbergh was suspected of being a Nazi sympathizer because of his numerous scientific expeditions to Nazi Germany, combined with a belief in eugenics. President Franklin Delano Roosevelt disliked Lindbergh's increasingly outspoken views against intervention and specifically Roosevelt's policies such as the Lend-Lease Act. Lindbergh's attempt to have his Army Air Corp commission reinstated in 1941 was blocked by the Roosevelt administration in December of that year. His subsequent combat missions as a civilian technical representative restored his reputation after the public found out about them, but only to an extent. However, his Pulitzer Prize-winning biographer, A. Scott Berg, contends that Lindbergh was not so much a supporter of the Nazi regime as someone so stubborn in his convictions and relatively inexperienced in political maneuvering that he easily allowed rivals to portray him as one. Lindbergh's receipt of the German medal was approved without objection by the American embassy; the war had not yet begun in Europe. Indeed, the award did not cause controversy until the war began and Lindbergh returned to the United States in 1939 to spread his message of non-intervention. A. Scott Berg similarly contends that Lindbergh's views were commonplace in the United States in the pre-World War II era. Lindbergh's support for the America First Committee was representative of the sentiments of a number of American people. His anti-Communism resonated deeply with many Americans. Eugenics and Nordicism enjoyed much social acceptance,[25] and other notable enthusiasts of such ideas included Theodore Roosevelt,[26] Winston Churchill[27] and George S. Patton .[28] Lindbergh's political views were complex, and revealed both consistencies and inconsistencies with those of the Nazis. For instance, Lindbergh avowed a belief in American democracy.[29] However, he clearly stated elsewhere that he believed the survival of the white race was more important than the survival of democracy in Europe: "Our bond with Europe is one of race and not of political ideology," he declared.[30] He had, however, a relatively positive attitude toward blacks[31] (something that was scheduled to be fully revealed in an undelivered speech interrupted by the events that followed the bombing of Pearl Harbor[32]). Critics have noticed an apparent influence of German philosopher Oswald Spengler's ideas on Lindbergh's thinking.[33] Controversial and widely read throughout Western World during the interwar era, Spengler was conservative and authoritarian, but eventually fell out of favor with the Nazis because he did not wholly subscribe to their theories of racial purity. Lindbergh's detractors created propaganda pamphlets attempting to tie him to alleged Nazi intrigue, pointing out that his efforts were praised in Nazi Germany and including quotations such as "Racial strength is vital; politics, a luxury." They included pictures of him using the stiff-armed Bellamy salute (a hand gesture described by Francis Bellamy to accompany his Pledge of Allegiance to the flag of the United States).[34] Berg explains that interventionist propagandists photographed Lindbergh and other America Firsters using this salute from an angle that did not show the American flag, so that it would be indistinguishable to observers from the Hitler salute. Although Lindbergh was labeled "anti-Semitic" in some quarters for his admonishment of Jewish leaders who favored American involvement in foreign wars, he often argued that he actually respected and sympathized with the Jewish people. In a speech entitled �Who are the War Agitators?� made on September 11, 1941, at an America First Committee�s rally in Des Moines, Iowa, Lindbergh declared, "I am not attacking either the Jewish or the British people. Both races, I admire."[35][36] These words were immediately followed, however, by the statement that: But I am saying that the leaders of both the British and the Jewish races, for reasons which are as understandable from their viewpoint as they are inadvisable from ours, for reasons which are not American, wish to involve us in the war. We cannot blame them for looking out for what they believe to be their own interests, but we also must look out for ours. We cannot allow the natural passions and prejudices of other peoples to lead our country to destruction. Lindbergh was ultimately critical of Nazi Germany's treatment of Jews. He said in his Des Moines speech that "No person with a sense of dignity of mankind can condone" such treatment.[35] He was also heavily criticized, however, for what many considered to be an anti-semitic contention that he made in the same speech with regards to America's Jews that "Their greatest danger to this country lies in their large ownership and influence in our motion pictures, our press, our radio and our government."[37] Lindbergh developed a long-term friendship with the automobile pioneer Henry Ford, who was well-known for his anti-Semitic diatribes and publications. In a famous comment about Lindbergh to Detroit's former FBI bureau chief in July 1940, Ford said: "When Charles comes out here, we only talk about the Jews." [38][39] Lindbergh argued that America did not have any business attacking Germany and believed in upholding the Monroe Doctrine, which his interventionist rivals felt was outdated. He feared that destroying a powerful European nation would lead to the downfall of Western Civilization and a rise in Communist supremacy over Europe. Much of his position was because he considered Russia to be a "semi-Asiatic" rather than European country compared to Germany, and because he found Communism to be an ideology that would destroy the West's "racial strength" and eventually replace everyone of European descent with "a pressing sea of Yellow, Black, and Brown". The latter belief was more important and consistent than the former, since he saw Russia as a natural barrier to the rising East Asian powers.[40][33] He believed that race was directly correlated to national success and non-whites were generally mentally inferior. Lindbergh admired specific elements from European nations, such as "the German genius for science and organization, the English genius for government and commerce, the French genius for living and the understanding of life". He believed that "in America they can be blended to form the greatest genius of all". His interrupted plan to voice his opposition to the Jim Crow laws was possibly inspired by his belief in black "sensate superiority" as well as an opportunity to expose what he saw as FDR's hypocrisy. As an advocate of political realism and a cultural pessimist, he may have felt that state-enforced racial segregation had become untenable and counterproductive. His message was popular throughout many Northern communities and especially well-received in the Midwest, while the American South was Anglophilic and supported a pro-British foreign policy.[41] Lindbergh considered Hitler a fanatic even before the details of the Holocaust reached him, but he openly stated that, if he had to choose, he would rather see his country allied with Nazi Germany than Soviet Russia. (He preferred "Nordic" cultures, but he also believed that Russia would one day be a valuable ally against potential aggression from East Asia after Soviet Communism was defeated.[40] The American Axis, written by Holocaust researcher and investigative journalist Max Wallace, takes a harsh view of Lindbergh's pre-war actions, agreeing with Franklin Roosevelt's assessment that Lindbergh was "pro-Nazi". However, Wallace finds that the Roosevelt Administration's accusations of dual loyalty or treason are unsubstantiated. Wallace considers Lindbergh a well-intentioned but bigoted and misguided sympathizer of the Nazis whose career as the leader of the isolationist movement had a destructive impact on Jewish people. In his 1999 biography of Lindbergh, A. Scott Berg criticizes Lindbergh's anti-Semitic beliefs but distinguishes between what Berg considers Lindbergh's paranoia about the intentions of most American Jews and the virulent anti-Semitism of the Nazis. Berg finds that Lindbergh believed in a voluntary rather than compulsory eugenics program but takes his subject to task for basing his view of the war on his "xenophobic thinking" and his assumption that Hitler was not as dangerous as a "Genghis Khan or Xerxes marching against our Western nations" because the Nazi leader was a European nationalist rather than a Communist or "some Asiatic intruder." The same year that Berg's Pulitzer Prize winning bestseller Lindbergh was published, a book appeared by Pat Buchanan entitled A Republic, Not An Empire: Reclaiming America's Destiny. The book portrays Lindbergh and other pre-war isolationists as American patriots, who were smeared by interventionists during the months leading up to Pearl Harbor. Buchanan suggests that the backlash against Lindbergh highlights "the explosiveness of mixing ethnic politics with foreign policy".[42] The views expressed in the book caused considerable controversy that eventually led to Buchanan's departure from the Republican Party. Lindbergh had always preached military strength and alertness.[43][44] He believed that a strong defensive war machine, as well as his views about race, would make America an impenetrable fortress and defend the Western Hemisphere from an attack by foreign powers, and that this was the U.S. military's sole purpose.[45] Many acknowledge that Lindbergh helped keep American public opinion isolationist until 1941 by advancing the movement to keep America out of the war for as long as possible. At the same time, some praise Lindbergh for his prediction that an Iron Curtain would descend upon Europe; many of the predictions which Lindbergh made about the war came before Hitler violated his non-aggression pact with Stalin and launched Operation Barbarossa.[46] Berg reveals that, while the attack on Pearl Harbor came as a shock to Lindbergh, he did predict that America's "wavering policy in the Philippines" would invite a bloody war there, and, in one speech, he warned that "we should either fortify these islands adequately, or get out of them entirely". Cole, Wallace, and Buchanan all believe that Lindbergh was highly influential in ensuring that Hitler's war machine would advance toward the Eastern Front and inflict the most devastation there. However, it should be noted that, as the most prominent spokesman of the America First Committee, he fought the Lend-Lease Act and the Atlantic Charter. Had the Lead-Lease Act not been passed, as well as the Destroyers for Bases Agreement, Britain might not have survived, possibly leading to Axis victory   The Outbreak Of War   As World War II began in Europe, Lindbergh became a prominent speaker in favor of non-intervention, going so far as to recommend that the United States negotiate a neutrality pact with Germany during his January 23, 1941, testimony before Congress. He joined the antiwar America First Committee and soon became its most prominent public spokesman, speaking to overflow crowds in Madison Square Garden in New York City and Soldier Field in Chicago. Charles Lindbergh speaking at an AFC rally In a speech at an America First rally on September 11, 1941, in Des Moines entitled "Who Are the War Agitators?" Lindbergh claimed that the three groups who had been "pressing this country toward war [were] the British, the Jewish and the Roosevelt Administration" and complained about the Jewish People's "large ownership and influence in our motion pictures, our press, our radio and our government." Although he made clear his opposition to German anti-Semitism, stating that "No person with a sense of the dignity of mankind can condone the persecution of the Jewish race in Germany," other comments seemed to suggest that he believed that Jews should expect trouble for supporting the war: "Instead of agitating for war, the Jewish groups in this country should be opposing it in every possible way for they will be among the first to feel its consequences. Tolerance is a virtue that depends upon peace and strength. History shows that it cannot survive war and devastation".[47] Lindbergh revealed a nativist xenophobia in an expurgated portion of his published diaries: �We must limit to a reasonable amount the Jewish influence� Whenever the Jewish percentage of total population becomes too high, a reaction seems to invariably occur. It is too bad because a few Jews of the right type are, I believe, an asset to any country.� His reaction to Kristallnacht was entrusted to his diary: "I do not understand these riots on the part of the Germans," he wrote. "It seems so contrary to their sense of order and intelligence. They have undoubtedly had a difficult 'Jewish problem,' but why is it necessary to handle it so unreasonably?" There was widespread negative reaction to the speech. Lindbergh was forced to defend and clarify his comments by noting again that he was not anti-Semitic, but he did not back away from his statement. Lindbergh resigned his commission in the U.S. Army Air Corps when President Roosevelt openly questioned his loyalty (which did severe damage to his reputation at the time). After the attack on Pearl Harbor in 1941, Lindbergh attempted to return to the Army Air Corps, but was denied when several of Roosevelt's cabinet secretaries registered objections. Lindbergh said: "I am not attacking the Jewish people. But I am saying that the leaders of both the British and the Jewish races, for reasons which are as understandable from their viewpoint as they are inadvisable from ours, for reasons which are not American, wish to involve us in the war."[48]   World War II   After the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, Lindbergh offered his services once again to his country, proposing to reactivate his colonel's commission within the new United States Army Air Forces. He was rejected by FDR's administration.[49] Charles Lindbergh then sought an active role in aviation to serve the war effort, if only as a civilian. He went on to assist with the war effort by serving as a consultant to aviation companies, beginning with Ford in 1942, working at the Willow Run B-24 production line. Later in 1943, he joined United Aircraft as an engineering consultant, devoting most of his time to its Chance-Vought Division. As a technical advisor with Ford, he was deeply involved in trouble-shooting early problems encountered in B-24 production. As B-24 production smoothed out, he devoted more time to Chance-Vought. The following year, he persuaded United Aircraft to designate him a technical representative in the Pacific War to study aircraft performances under combat conditions. He showed Marine F4U pilots how to take off with twice the bomb load that the aircraft was rated for and on May 21, 1944 he flew his first combat mission: a strafing run with VMF-222 near the Japanese garrison of Rabaul.[50] In his six months in the Pacific in 1944, Lindbergh took part in fighter bomber raids on Japanese positions, flying about 50 combat missions (again as a civilian). His innovations in the use of P-38s impressed a supportive Gen. Douglas MacArthur.[51] Lindbergh's contributions included engine-leaning techniques that he introduced to P-38 Lightning pilots, greatly improving fuel usage at cruise speeds, enabling the long-range fighter aircraft to fly even longer range missions. On July 28, 1944, during a P-38 bomber escort mission with the 475th Fighter Group, Fifth Air Force, in the Ceram area, Lindbergh shot down a Sonia observation plane piloted by Captain Saburo Shimada, Commanding Officer of the 73rd Independent Chutai.[52][50] The U.S. Marine and Army Air Force pilots who served with "Slim" admired and respected him, praising his courage and defending his patriotism.     Click on Picture to enlarge The Spirit of St. Louis on display at the National Air and Space Museum in Washington, D.C After World War II he lived quietly in Connecticut as a consultant both to the chief of staff of the U.S. Air Force and to Pan American World Airways . With most of Eastern Europe having fallen under Communist control, Lindbergh believed most of his pre-war assessments had been correct all along. But Berg reports that after witnessing the defeat of Germany and the horrors of the Holocaust firsthand shortly after his service in the Pacific, "he knew the American public no longer gave a hoot about his opinions." His 1953 book The Spirit of St. Louis, recounting his nonstop transatlantic flight, won the Pulitzer Prize in 1954. Dwight D. Eisenhower restored Lindbergh's assignment with the Army Air Corps and made him a Brigadier General in 1954. In that year, he served on the Congressional advisory panel set up to establish the site of the United States Air Force Academy. In December 1968, he visited the crew of Apollo 8 on the eve of the first manned spaceflight to leave earth orbit.   His Children From Other Relationships   From 1957 until his death in 1974, Lindbergh had an affair with German hat maker Brigitte Hesshaimer who lived in a small Bavarian town called Geretsried (35 km south of Munich). On November 23, 2003, DNA tests proved that he fathered her three children: Dyrk (1958), Astrid (1960) and David (1967). The two managed to keep the affair secret; even the children did not know the true identity of their father, whom they saw when he came to visit once or twice per year using the alias, "Careu Kent". Astrid later read a magazine article about Lindbergh and found snapshots and more than a hundred letters written from him to her mother. She disclosed the affair after both Brigitte and Anne Morrow Lindbergh had died. At the same time as Lindbergh was involved with Brigitte Hesshaimer, he also had relationship with her sister, Marietta, who bore him two more sons � Vago and Christoph. Lindbergh had a house of his own design built for Marietta in a vineyard in Grimisuat in the Swiss canton Valais.[53] A 2005 book by German author Rudolf Schroeck, Das Doppelleben des Charles A. Lindbergh (The Double Life of Charles A. Lindbergh), claims seven secret children existed in Germany. It says Lindbergh "came and went as he pleased" during the last 17 years of his life, spending between three to five days with his Munich family about four to five times each year. "Ten days before he died in August 1974, Lindbergh wrote three letters from his hospital bed to his three mistresses and requested 'utmost secrecy'," Schroeck writes, whose book includes a copy of that letter to Brigitte Hesshaimer. In April 2008, Reeve Lindbergh, his youngest daughter, will publish Forward From Here, a book of essays that includes her discovery in 2003, of the truth about her father's three secret European families and her journeys to meet them and understand an expanded meaning of family. [54]   His Environmental Causes   From the 1960s on, Lindbergh became an advocate for the conservation of the natural world, campaigning to protect endangered species like humpback and blue whales, was instrumental in establishing protections for the controversial [55] Filipino group, the Tasaday, and African tribes, and supporting the establishment of a national park. While studying the native flora and fauna of the Philippines, he became involved in an effort to protect the Philippine eagle. In his final years, Lindbergh became troubled that the world was out of balance with its natural environment; he stressed the need to regain that balance, and spoke against the introduction of supersonic airliners. Lindbergh's speeches and writings later in life emphasized his love of both technology and nature, and a lifelong belief that "all the achievements of mankind have value only to the extent that they preserve and improve the quality of life." In a 1967 Life magazine article, he said, "The human future depends on our ability to combine the knowledge of science with the wisdom of wildness." In honor of Charles and his wife Anne Morrow Lindbergh's vision of achieving balance between the technological advancements they helped pioneer, and the preservation of the human and natural environments, the Lindbergh Award was established in 1978. Each year since 1978, the Lindbergh Foundation has given the award to recipients whose work has made a significant contribution toward the concept of "balance." Lindbergh's final book, Autobiography of Values, based on an unfinished manuscript was published posthumously. While on his death bed, he had contacted his friend, William Jovanovich, head of Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, to edit the lengthy memoirs. [56]   Click on Picture to enlarge Charles Lindbergh's grave Lindbergh spent his final years on the Hawaiian island of Maui, where he died of lymphoma[57] on August 26, 1974. He was buried on the grounds of the Palapala Ho'omau Church in Kipahulu, Maui. His epitaph on a simple stone which quotes Psalms 139:9, reads: Charles A. Lindbergh Born: Michigan, 1902. Died: Maui, 1974. If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea. � CAL Because of earthquake damage to Hawaii State Highway 31, Lindbergh's final resting place is presently accessible by land only via State Highway 360, or the so-called Road to Hana.   Honors And Tributes   The Lindbergh Terminal at Minneapolis-Saint Paul International Airport was named after him, and a replica of The Spirit of St. Louis hangs there. Another replica of his aircraft hangs in the great hall at the recently rebuilt Jefferson Memorial at Forest Park in St. Louis. The definitive oil painting of Charles Lindbergh by St. Louisan Richard Krause entitled "The Spirit Soars" ([1]) has been displayed there. He lent his name to San Diego's Lindbergh Field, which is also known as San Diego International Airport. The airport in Winslow, Arizona has been renamed Winslow-Lindbergh Regional. Lindbergh himself designed the airport in 1929 when it was built as a refueling point for the first coast-to-coast air service. The airport in Little Falls, Minnesota, where he grew up, has been named Little Falls/Morrison County-Lindbergh Field. The original "The Spirit of St. Louis" currently resides in the National Air and Space Museum as part of the collection of the Smithsonian Institution. In 1952, Grandview High School in St. Louis County was renamed Lindbergh High School. The school newspaper is the Pilot, the yearbook is the Spirit, and the students are known as the Flyers. The school district was also later named after Lindbergh. The stretch of US 67 that runs through most of the St. Louis metro area is called "Lindbergh Blvd." Lindbergh has a star on the St. Louis Walk of Fame. In Lindbergh's hometown of Little Falls, Minnesota, one of the district's elementary schools is named Charles Lindbergh Elementary. The district's sports teams are named the "Flyers" and "Lindbergh Drive" is a major road on the west side of town, leading to "Lindbergh State Park" (named after Lindbergh's father). The original Lindbergh residence is maintained as a museum, the "Charles A. Lindbergh Historic Site." [58] Lindbergh is a recipient of the Silver Buffalo Award, the highest adult award given by the Boy Scouts of America.   Awards & Decorations   Lindbergh received many awards, medals and decorations, most of which were later donated to the Missouri Historical Society and are on display at the Jefferson Memorial, now part of the Missouri History Museum in Forest Park, St. Louis, Missouri: Click on Picture to enlarge The Congressional Gold Medal authorized by the Congress on May 4, 1928, and presented on August 15, 1930 to Col. C.A. Lindbergh by President Calvin Coolidge at The White House, Washington, DC. Medal of Honor (USA, 1927) L�gion d'honneur (France, 1927) Royal Air Force Cross (UK) Hubbard Medal (USA, 1927) Click on Picture to enlarge The Medal Of Honor Rank and organization: Captain, U.S. Army Air Corps Reserve. Place and date: From New York City to Paris, France, May 20�21, 1927. Entered service at: Little Falls, Minn. Born: February 4, 1902, Detroit, Mich. G.O. No.: 5, W.D., 1928; act of Congress December 14, 1927. Citation: For displaying heroic courage and skill as a navigator, at the risk of his life, by his nonstop flight in his airplane, the "Spirit of St. Louis," from New York City to Paris, France, 20-21 May 1927, by which Capt. Lindbergh not only achieved the greatest individual triumph of any American citizen but demonstrated that travel across the ocean by aircraft was possible.[60]     Click on Picture to enlarge A wall-mounted quote by Charles Augustus Lindbergh in The American Adventure in the World Showcase pavilion of Walt Disney World's Epcot. The controversy surrounding his involvement in politics (and to a lesser extent, his personal life) sometimes overshadows the fact that he was an important pioneer in aviation from the 1920s to the 1950s. His 1927 flight made him the first international celebrity in the age of mass media. One U.S. Air Force general remembers Lindbergh's critical view of his own legacy. In the late 1940s, Lindbergh visited U.S. Air Force bases to evaluate American air power (of which he was a staunch supporter) in relation to the emerging Cold War. During this trip, he remarked "I think my flight to Paris came too soon for the civilizations of the world. They were suddenly thrown together by air travel and they weren't quite ready for it."[61]  

i don't know

The longest floating bridge in the world, the Evergreen Point Floating Bridge is officially named after what former Washington governor?

10 of the world's longest bridges - CNN.com 10 of the world's longest bridges Benjamin Solomon, Travel + Leisure Updated 6:16 AM ET, Thu July 30, 2015 Chat with us in Facebook Messenger. Find out what's happening in the world as it unfolds. Photos: Longest suspension bridge – The world's longest suspension bridge, the Akashi-Kaikyo Bridge in Japan, spans the Akashi Strait that separates Kobe from Iwaya. Hide Caption 1 of 10 Photos: Longest inhabited bridge – Krämerbrücke, the longest inhabited bridge, is located in Erfurt, Germany. It's a stone arch bridge dating back to 1325. Some 32 of the 62 houses added on top survive. Hide Caption 2 of 10 Photos: Longest continuous bridge over water – The longest continuous bridge over water, the Lake Pontchartrain Causeway in Louisiana, runs 23.79 miles over open water. Hide Caption 3 of 10 Photos: Longest canopy walkway – The Taman Negara Canopy Walkway in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, is the world's longest canopy walkway. Hide Caption Longest floating bridge – Evergreen Point Bridge in Seattle, Washington, is the longest floating bridge. Hide Caption 5 of 10 Photos: Longest masonry arch bridge – The longest masonry arch bridge span is Pont de la Libération in Villeneuve-sur-Lot, France. Hide Caption 6 of 10 Photos: Longest covered bridge – The longest covered bridge is the Hartland Bridge in New Brunswick, Canada, a National Historic Site of Canada. Hide Caption 7 of 10 Photos: Longest rail bridge – China takes the title for the longest rail bridge with the Danyang--Kunshan Grand Bridge, which connects Shanghai to Nanjing along the Beijing-Shanghai High-Speed Railway. Hide Caption 8 of 10 Photos: Longest ice bridge – The longest ice bridge is the Beaufort Sea Road in Alaska. Yes, it's pure Arctic ice. Hide Caption 9 of 10 Photos: Longest natural bridge span – The Fairy Bridge in Guangxi, China has the longest natural bridge span. It's only accessible by a three-hour rafting trip. Hide Caption These 10 longest bridges range from suspension to ice bridges Every day, 23,000 cars pass over Japan's Akashi-Kaikyo Bridge Kuala Lumpur boasts the longest canopy walkway at 1,509 feet China is home to three of the world's longest natural bridge spans (Travel Leisure) If you ever find yourself in Hunan, China, rent a car and drive the Jishou-Chadong Expressway: 18 tunnels under the Wuling mountains that culminate at the Aizhai Bridge, a gut-churning 1,150-foot-high suspension bridge over the Dehang Canyon. It's a man-made wonder, the world's highest (and maybe even scariest) tunnel-to-tunnel bridge -- and yet it ranks only 15th among the world's longest suspension bridges. For the thrill of seeing No. 1, you'd need to head to Kobe, Japan, and marvel at the Akashi-Kaikyo Bridge. But in the race to build the biggest and baddest bridges of them all, record-hungry China tends to dominate in hard stats; five out of the top 10 suspension bridges are there, for instance. So instead of a China-heavy list of bridges, we've focused on a variety of categories, from covered bridges to pontoon floaters, to bring you a diverse cross section of the longest. JUST WATCHED MUST WATCH Timelapse shows largest bridge slide 00:43 From the ice roads of Arctic Alaska to a cable-stayed controversy on the other side of the Bering Strait -- stretching over cities, seas and even the jungle canopy -- the world's longest bridges exist on a scale that can only be described as stupefying. Be sure to gas up before you take them on. Longest suspension bridge span: Akashi-Kaikyo Bridge, Kobe, Japan Read More Length: 6,532 ft. Before this steel behemoth bridged the Akashi Strait that separates Kobe from Iwaya, severe storms in the area would routinely sink ferries. Not that the world's longest suspension bridge has it any easier: every day, 23,000 cars pass over a structure that must withstand earthquakes (a 7.2 magnitude earthquake hit in 1995), consistently strong tidal currents (9 knots), and wind gusts up to 179 mph. Completed in 1998, the record-setting central span 213 feet above the sea makes up over half its total 12,831-foot length; by comparison, the Golden Gate's central span is only 4,200 feet. For an up-close-and-personal (and gut-dropping) view, bridge tours take visitors to the top of one of the towers. jb-honshi.co.jp Longest inhabited bridge: Krämerbrücke, Erfurt, Germany Length: 259 ft. Like the Old London Bridge before it and Italy's Ponte Vecchio, the fairy tale-like Krämerbrücke, or Merchant's Bridge, is a bit of European history preserved in the modern day. After a series of fires destroyed previous attempts to build a span over the Breitstrom River in the 12th and 13th centuries, a stone arch bridge was built in 1325. Eventually, 62 half-timbered houses were added on top, 32 of which survived till today and continue to be home to shopkeepers and artisans. This multipurpose bridge has likely inspired more contemporary versions, like Zaha Hadid's 919-foot-long Bridge Pavilion in Zaragoza, Spain. erfurt-tourismus.de Longest bridge over water (continuous): Lake Pontchartrain Causeway, Louisiana Length: 23.87 miles Due to recent feats of Chinese engineering, the four-lane, 5,189-pile concrete trestle bridge north of New Orleans got demoted by Guinness World Records for world's longest bridge over water. But the change did not come without controversy, with many Pontchartrain loyalists arguing that the new winner, a 25.84-mile elevated highway-bridge-tunnel project near Qingdao, China, actually has only 16.1 miles that span the sea compared to 23.79 miles of Pontchartrain's that are over open water. Guinness compromised by bestowing a new title upon the 58-year-old causeway: Longest Bridge Over Water (Continuous). However you rank it, it's still a pulse-quickening half-hour drive. thecauseway.us Travel photos we wish we'd taken Longest canopy walkway: Taman Negara Canopy Walkway, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia Length: 1,509 ft. Deep in the heart of the Malaysian jungle, the Taman Negara Canopy Walkway provides visitors with unparalleled views and no shortage of thrills. For a mere $1.50, adventurers can channel their inner macaque (and probably see one, too) while traversing more than a quarter mile of narrow bridges strewn between centuries-old trees, offering up-close-and-vertigo-inducing views of local flora and fauna -- 160 feet above the jungle floor. taman-negara.com Longest floating bridge: Evergreen Point Bridge, Seattle Length: 7,580 ft. Officially known as Governor Albert D. Rosellini Bridge (the Washington statesman who oversaw its creation in the early 1960s), this section of State Route 520 connects Seattle to its eastern suburbs via a roadway that floats atop Lake Washington on 33 football field-size pontoons. The design was chosen due to the lake's unstable bed and the curved nature of the roadway (a common problem for the area, which would explain why the state is home to four of the five largest floating bridges in the world). The aging structure is currently being replaced by a larger, even longer, more modern floating bridge that can even accommodate a light-rail system. wsdot.wa.gov Governor Albert D. Rosellini Bridge, State Route 520, Seattle, WA; Longest masonry arch bridge span: Pont de la Libération, Villeneuve-sur-Lot, France Length: 315 ft. Though arch bridges are still popular today, they're usually built with modern materials like steel (see: Chongqing, China's Chaotianmen Bridge, at 5,712 feet the longest arch bridge span, period). Which is a shame, considering some masonry arch bridges (brick and/or stone) are so mathematically precise, not to mention beautiful, they could stand without mortar. More than 100 years old and spanning the Lot River in southwestern France, the Pont de la Libération is made of brick and unreinforced concrete -- technically very small stones and mortar. If it's anything like its distant cousin the Pont du Gard aqueduct, it will stand for hundreds more. Take note, China bridge barons. Longest covered bridge: The Hartland Bridge, New Brunswick, Canada Length: 1,283 ft. The bridges of Madison County have nothing on this 112-year-old National Historic Site of Canada, which became the world's longest covered bridge only after two spans were destroyed by river ice in 1920, prompting replacement and a roof (covering helps prevent rot on the central wooden trusses). Built as a private bridge by a coalition of residents desperately in need of a direct way across the Saint John River -- 3 cents for a pedestrian; 6 cents for a horse and wagon -- it's now a regional icon open to all, beloved enough to get its own Google Doodle. town.hartland.nb.ca Longest rail bridge: Danyang-Kunshan Grand Bridge, China Length: 102.4 miles Connecting Shanghai to Nanjing along the Beijing-Shanghai High-Speed Railway, this elevated viaduct was named the world's longest bridge -- period -- by Guinness World Records when it opened in 2011. (Also on the railway, the 70.6-mile Tianjin Grand Bridge, which connects Langfang to Qingxian, is the world's second longest.) Running parallel to the Yangtze River past lowland rice paddies, most of the span acts as an elevated railway, similar to the El in Chicago, though a 5.6-mile section does act like a traditional bridge, crossing the Yangcheng Lake in Suzhou. Longest ice bridge: Beaufort Sea Road, Alaska Length: 68 miles Time, fortitude and frigid cold are the only tools needed to build an ice bridge. Made popular by the hit reality TV series Ice Road Truckers, many of these cold-temperature roadways traverse a snowy mix of land and frozen lakes. But this span over the Beaufort Sea to Alaska's northernmost oil fields is pure Arctic ice. One of the most dangerous (and unique) bridges on this list, it is also one of the only ways to service the ExxonMobil hub of Point Thomson. Longest natural bridge span: The Fairy Bridge, Guangxi, China Length: 400 ft. Though bridges are one of the greatest examples of human engineering, they are hardly a creation unique to man: rock archways hewn by Mother Nature (usually by erosion) likely provided inspiration for our brick-and-steel masterworks. And wouldn't you know it, even in this category of bridges, China still dominates. The country is home to three of the longest natural bridge spans in the world, including the 400-foot stunner over the Buliu River near the border of Vietnam. Carved out of a limestone karst, the Fairy Bridge (Xianren Qiao) is an isolated structure accessible only by a three-hour rafting trip. naturalarches.org

Albert Rosellini

September 1, 1914 saw the last example of what species, which existed in enormous migratory flocks, sometimes containing more than two billion birds that could stretch one mile wide and 300 miles long, when Martha died at the Cincinnati Zoo?

Bridges – VivaBoo Seattle, WA is Home to the Longest Floating Bridge in the World The Evergreen Point Floating Bridge, officially changed to the Governor Albert D. Rosellini Bridge in 1988 ( to honor the governor who advocated the bridge’s construction) is probably the closest you’ll ever get to driving on a large body of water. It is 7,500 feet across making it the longest floating bridge in the world. The locals refer to the bridge as the “520 Bridge” as it is part of State Route 520 and goes across Lake Washington from Seattle, WA to Medina, WA. Image By Oran Viriyincy The Governor Albert D. Rosselini – Evergreen Point Floating Bridge, opened back in August 1963, is not the first floating bridge to go across Lake Washington. The first was the Lake Washington Floating Bridge built back in the 1940s as part of Route 10. Referred to as essentially a 1.42 mile long barge, the Governor Albert D. Rosselini – Evergreen Point Floating Bridge was in fact a creative and innovative solution to the problem architects faced at the time. How were they going to get a bridge across a lake that was far too wide and deep for a traditional suspension bridge? Their solution? A floating bridge. The bridge was constructed using prestressed concrete pontoons each measuring approximately 360 feet long, 60 feet wide and 14.9 feet deep. And while a good portion of the bridge “floats” on the water, there are sections on either side that are elevated to let smaller boats and vessels pass under the bridge. There is also a drawspan, or retractable portion of the bridge, that opens by separating the middle pontoons and sliding them under the elevated sections in order to let larger vessels through. They can also be opened to relieve water pressure during storms. Now, due to the weight of reinforcements added over the years, the bridge currently sits about a foot lower than it did after its original construction. Also, despite various retrofits, the bridge is still in danger of collapse surrounding any major seismic activity and is usually closed during high winds for safety reasons. Putting all that aside, it is still an incredible bridge, definitely worth taking a drive across…for the experience alone. The Truly Innovative Oresund Bridge (Oresundsbron) Designed to Connect Sweden and Denmark Stretching across the Oresund Straight is the truly innovative 7,845 meter (25,738 foot) Oresund Bridge or as it’s locally referred to, the Oresundsbron. For locals or tourists looking to travel between Malmo, Sweden and Copenhagen, Denmark, without having to fly, the Oresund Bridge is the route to take. Image By supermaskinen But the Oresund Bridge is more than your typical bridge, it is a 4-lane highway as well as a 2-track railway. Every day thousands and thousands of vehicles cross the bridge. Between the vehicles and the trains that travel across the bridge, it is estimated 30-35 million people travel this route every year. The Oresund Bridge is reportedly the longest road and rail bridge in all of Europe. Interestingly enough, part of the Oresund Bridge crossing is actually a tunnel and man-made island. So needless to say, quite a bit of construction and architectural masterminding was required to built the Oresund Bridge. After about five years of construction the bridge finally opened mid-2000. On the Danish side, vehicles go through a 4 km (2.5 mile) tunnel and emerge from the tunnel to the man-made island at which point they are now at bridge level as they continue over to Sweden. You may wonder why the bridge wasn’t built the same on both sides. Well, per reports, the bridge was built with the additional tunnel and island features so it would not interrupt air traffic at the nearby airport nor shipping traffic coming through the straight in either good or bad weather. The Landmark Lions Gate Bridge in Vancouver, BC Canada Connecting the city of Vancouver, British Columbia to the North Shore (in North Vancouver) is the famous Lions Gate Bridge. Also known as the First Narrows Bridge, The Lions Gate Bridge is an articulate suspension bridge going from Stanley Park across Burrard Inlet to North and West Vancouver. The name Lions Gate is said to be named after The Lions, a pair of mountain peaks along the North Shore Mountains. Image By ecstaticist The bridge is 1823 meters (5890 feet) in total, with a tower height of 111 meters (364 feet). It was designed with three reversible lanes, each of which are monitored by signals. The middle lane in particular changes direction based on the flow of traffic in order to ease congestion. This particular feature was installed after congestion made the bridge a nightmare to travel across. Although the idea to build a bridge at this location was brought to life as early as 1890, the bridge didn’t receive final approval and support to be built until 1933. Even after that, it took until 1937 for construction to begin. After much work and millions of dollars later, the bridge finally opened in November 1938. Then in May 1939, during a royal visit to Canada, King George VI and Queen Elizabeth presided over the official opening of the bridge. Prior to the bridge being built, ferries took people across to the North Shore. Needless to say, as the bridge continued to be used more and more, the ferries were eventually forced to close due to lack of passengers and revenue. Different upgrades made to the bridge over the years included adding pedestrian pathways to the outside of the bridge and increasing width of the road lanes. Then in 1986, the Guinness family donated decorative lights to the city of Vancouver that would adorn the bridge and make it stand out at night as much as it stands out during the day. In March of 2005, the Lions Gate Bridge became designated as a National Historic Site of Canada. It’s easy to see why when you look at the following pictures. The Pont du Gard Aqueduct Bridge is Roman Masonry at its Finest Far more than just your typical bridge, the Pont du Gard (Roman aqueduct bridge) in southern France was once a virtual lifeline to the city of Nimes. The Pont du Gard was part of a 50 km aqueduct that ran from Uzes, at the source of the Eure, all the way to Nimes where it was one of the main sources of water to the rapidly expanding city. Image by Wolfgang Staudt The aqueduct itself was built over a span of 15 years between 40-60 AD, during the Roman Empires of Claude and Nero. The aqueduct was truly an architectural feat in that the height difference between the source of the water and its destination in Nimes, was only a mere 12 meters.  Despite that, engineers managed to build the aqueduct so that through the power of gravity alone, the water would travel from Uzes to Nimes with ease. The Pont du Gard was able to give Nimes the much sought after prestige it desired, as a result of being able to provide water to its fountains, sewage lines, spas and homes. In its prime, around 200 million liters of water per day used to travel across the Pont du Gard. The Pont du Gard is a stunning masterpiece and is recognized as the highest of all the roman aqueduct bridges. Constructed over the Gard River, the Pont du Gard consists of three levels. The lower level has 6 arches, each measuring 22 meters high. The middle level has 11 arches, each measuring 20 meters high. The third, and last, level has 35 arches (although it used to have 47), each measuring 7 meters high. The bridge was built primarily of stone, around 54,000 tons of it, and used very few clamps or mortar. Some of the individual blocks weigh up to 6 tons each. The bridge is 49 meters high when the river it at its lowest and 274 meters long. During the 13th century, the King granted local lords the right to levy tolls on all who crossed the bridge, in exchange for them helping with the upkeep of the bridge itself. After sustaining serious damage in the 1600s, the bridge received some minor patch-ups and repairs. However, it is thought that if Napoleon III hadn’t taken a personal interest in this Roman masterpiece it would never have received much needed repairs and restoration in the mid 1800s. Since then a number of massive floods, including one that entirely submerged the lower level of the Pont du Gard, have ravaged the bridge. Thankfully due to its architectural and cultural value, it was added to UNESCO’s (United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization) list of World Heritage Sites in 1985 and continues to be kept up and maintained. One look will tell you why the Pont du Gard has become one of France’s top tourist destinations and what many consider a required stop for French masons looking to study and learn about its incredible masonry. The Historic Stari Most Bridge in Mostar, Connecting Bosnia and Herzegovina The Stari Most bridge (also known as the “Old Bridge”) was originally built way back in 1566 during the height of the Ottoman Empire. It was a Turkish architect who designed the bridge, commissioned by Suleiman the Magnificant, to replace the wooden suspension bridge that had previously been built to span the Neretva River. However, Stari Most became much more than a simple bridge. Image By lassi.kurkijarvi Stari Most became a main thoroughfare and key link between the Ottoman East and the Christian West. It seemed to evolve into the heart of the city of Mostar, joining Bosnia and Herzegovina both literally and figuratively. Stari Most is approximately 4 meters (13 feet) wide and 30 meters (98 feet) long. It stands a little over 24 meters (78 feet) above the river. The original arch of the bridge was built using a local stone called tenelija. There are no foundations on either side of the bridge, instead abutments of limestone secure the bridge to walls along the cliffs on either side of the river. There are two fortified towers or “bridge keepers”, one on either side of the bridge, to protect it. The Helebija Tower on the northeast side and the Tara Tower on the southwest side. Despite all Stari Most had seen and gone through, the Old Bridge reliably stood its ground for 427 years. It wasn’t until the Croat-Bosniak War in 1993 when the bridge became one of the many casualties of war. It was hit and damaged so badly that it fell into the river. All that remained was a shell or a mere memory of what had once been. Then even though it took a little over a decade to rebuild, the Stari Most Bridge was rebuilt and restored to its original beauty in 2004. And in order to keep with tradition and in honor of the Old Bridge, divers were able to recover some of the original stones from the river so they could be used in the reconstruction of the bridge. These days many tourists visit Mostar and the Stari Most Bridge to see both its beauty and its historical value. Another interesting fact is that the bridge has been used, since the mid 1600s, as a place where young men would jump into the Neretva River. Since the late 1960s diving competition have been held from the bridge, as it takes a very skilled diver to dive into the shallow waters below. Needless to say, Stari Most stands today as a stunning reminder of a what once was and what still can be. It is truly a bridge from the past to the future. The Ambassador Bridge, A Vital Link Between The US and Canada The Ambassador Bridge, connecting Detroit, Michigan and Windsor, Ontario is more than a simple suspension bridge connecting two countries. It is the busiest international border crossing in all of North America. More than 25% of all merchandise trade traveling between the US and Canada crosses over the Ambassador Bridge. Additionally, the bridge isn’t owned by either the US or Canada, it is privately-owned. Image By Andrew Senay It all started shortly after World War II. Charles Fowler, a prominent NY civil engineer came up with the idea for a bridge that would link the US and Canada. It would be able to accommodate not only street cars and trains, but cars and people as well. He even went so far as to get the support of both the Canadian and American Transit Companies. Unfortunately, his plans were considered a little too ambitious for some people. Thankfully, he had someone else who believed in his idea. John W. Austin of the Detroit Graphite Company decided the bridge needed to be built. So after meeting with Financier Joseph A. Bower, the two men came to an agreement which ultimately lead to the construction of the $23.5 million dollar, privately-financed link between the US and Canada: The Ambassador Bridge. After many barriers and even a mayoral veto on the project, the bridge finally received its approval to move forward. Construction was completed in a few short years and the bridge finally opened in November 1929. At the time it was built, it was considered the longest suspension bridge in the world at 7,490 feet long. These days over 10,000 commercial vehicles travel across the Ambassador Bridge every day. Per reports, more than $13 billion dollars a year in production depend heavily on the Ambassador Bridge as an international border crossing. There isn’t a busier crossing in North America in terms of trade volume. A few interesting little tid-bits about the bridge: shortly after it opened many people used the bridge to perform stunts such as planes flying under it and a man parachuting off of it. It has also had its share of movie fame. You can see the Ambassador Bridge in such movies as: 8 Mile, Grosse Pointe Blank, Bowling for Columbine and Hoffa. For those planning a visit to see this key link in the international trade between the United States and Canada, be sure you see the bridge at night. The beautiful lights on the bridge’s cables can be seen for miles around and make a stunning sight.

i don't know

September 1, 1939 saw the start of World War II when Germany invaded what country?

World War II Timeline: September 1, 1939-September 6, 1939 - Start of World War II: September 1939-March 1940 | HowStuffWorks World War II Timeline: September 1, 1939-September 6, 1939 World War II officially began on September 1, 1939, when Nazi Germany invaded Poland. Below is a timeline tracing some of the important events of the first week of September, 1939. World War II Timeline: September 1-September 6 September 1: World War II begins as the Germans invade Poland with a three-front Blitzkrieg. They attack the Polish army with an overwhelming force of 1.5 million troops backed by tactical aircraft in the sky and mobile armor on the ground. Up Next Japan Bombs Pearl Harbor: July 1941-December 1941 September 2: Poland pleads for assistance from sworn allies Britain and France. They respond the following day by demanding Nazi Germany's withdrawal and declaring war against the Nazi regime. India, Canada, Australia, and New Zealand (and soon South Africa) issue their own declarations of war. September 3: Conservative parliamentarian Winston Churchill is named first lord of the admiralty. Britain's Royal Air Force (RAF) carries out the first propaganda air raid of the war, salting northern Germany with six million pamphlets. Without warning, a German U-boat torpedoes the Athenia, a British passenger ship carrying 1,400 civilians from England to Canada, killing 118. September 4: The first RAF air assault is a disaster, with only eight of 29 bombers striking German naval bases. Ten of the RAF bombers get lost, seven are shot down, three attack one of Britain's own ships, and one attacks neutral Denmark. Spain's General Francisco Franco offers his support to the Axis while publicly declaring neutrality. September 5: The Nazis occupy the medieval Polish city of Kraków. The United States officially declares its neutrality. September 6: RAF Hurricanes and Spitfires that scramble during a false air raid alert end up shooting at each other, with the Spitfires downing the Hurricanes. World War II Headlines Below are more images and headlines from World War II that examine the details of Nazi Germany's aggression in early September, 1939. Junkers Ju-87 (Stukas) vital to success of Blitzkrieg: Close air support was a prerequisite for the success of the Wehrmacht's Blitzkrieg operations. In 1939 and early 1940, the gull-winged, single-engine Junkers Ju-87 (Stuka) -- with three machine guns and a maximum bomb load of 1,540 pounds -- was vital to such operations. The terror sirens of these diving aircraft struck fear into those on the ground below, while their bombs and guns amplified this terror with death and destruction. However, once opposed by more modern fighter aircraft -- such as the British RAF's Spitfires and Hurricanes beginning in 1940 -- the Ju-87s proved vulnerable. They were subsquently utilized only occasionally in support of front-line offensive operations. German general Fedor von Bock tops in the field: German general Fedor von Bock was a distinguished old-style Prussian officer who commanded the German Anschluss forces in 1938. In 1939 he commanded Army Group North during the Polish campaign and, in 1940, Army Group B during the Blitzkrieg that speedily overran the Low Countries and defeated France. Later, Bock was twice relieved of commands in Russia: first in 1941 following a failed offensive against Moscow, and subsequently in 1942 after disagreements with Adolf Hitler over operational decisions. Having survived both those campaigns and Hitler's displeasure, he was killed in an Allied air raid on May 4, 1945. View Enlarged Image Poland succumbs to German invasion: The event that finally destroyed any residual hopes in London or Paris that appeasement might yet succeed was Adolf Hitler's invasion of Poland. At dawn on September 1, 1939, successive waves of bombers and fighter-bombers raided deep into Poland. Simultaneously, the tanks, artillery, and infantry of two German army groups, comprised of five separate armies, launched devastating attacks against the sizable but outdated and poorly deployed Polish forces. Warsaw finally fell on September 27, the effectiveness of Nazi Germany's Wehrmacht had been validated, and the Blitzkrieg concept of warfare was born. Continue reading to learn more about the German invasion of Poland in September 1939, which marked the beginning of World War II. To follow more major events of World War II, see:

Poland

According to the proverb, two heads are what?

World War II |The Blitzkrieg and the Battle of Britain The Blitzkrieg   On September 1, 1939 Germany invaded Poland and World War II began. At the same time the Soviet Union attacked Poland from the east. It was divided up among the countries before the Allies were able to help. Germany's attack was carried out with fast tanks and troops that were supported by warplanes. Because the German army moved very quickly this phase of the war was called "Blitzkrieg". In the following spring Germany invaded Norway and Denmark. Both countries were occupied by the German army by June. On May 10, 1940 Hitler's troops invaded the Low Countries- Belgium, the Netherlands and Luxembourg and days later they surrendered. In the middle of May German soldiers crossed into France and by June 14 the Germans had entered Paris. On June 22 France signed a peace agreement with Germany. German forces then occupied northern France and the Atlantic coast. A new government that was friendly to the Germans was formed in Vichy. On the other side General Charles de Gaulle escaped to Great Britain and started his free French movement. In a radio broadcasts he urged the French people to fight against the Germans.   The Battle of Britain Hitler next wanted to invade the island of Great Britain. He attacked the British Air Force in order to control the skies over the island. It was history's first major air battle. In June 1940, the German Luftwaffe began bombing airfields and other targets in southern England. German warplanes attacked from airports in France. At the end of the battle the British had shot down about 1700 German planes. Hitler saw that he could not defeat England's air force so he gave up his idea of invading Britain. Instead he sent the Luftwaffe to bomb British cities and towns. In London alone, more than 12,000 civilians were killed. German Messerschmidt aircraft used in the Battle of Britain   airfield = a smaller airport where military planes take off and land Allies = the countries that fought against Germany in the Second World War attack = to start using bombs and guns against an enemy in a war battle = a fight between armies in a war broadcast = here: to send a message over the radio civilian = a person who is not a soldier in a war defeat = to win against divide up =to give a part of something to two or more countries escape = to get away government = the group of people who rule a country instead =in something’s place invade = to take control of a country by sending an army into it major = big, important movement = group of people who believe the same things and have the same ideas occupy = to enter a country with soldiers and stay there and control it for a longer time peace = opposite of "war" peace agreement = when two people, groups or countries promise not to attack each other sign = to write your name on a document soldiers = people who fight for a country in a war support = help surrender = give up tank = a heavy military car that moves on a metal belt. It has a large gun on its top target = object you want to attack troops = soldiers urge = persuade, to ask someone to do something Topics

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What's missing: Denial, Anger, Depression, Acceptance

Grief.com – Because LOVE Never Dies Five Stages of Grief by Elisabeth Kubler Ross & David Kessler Request a Lecture In our work, On Grief and Grieving Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and I wanted to revisit the stages for clarification in grief and loss. The stages have evolved since their introduction and they have been very misunderstood over the past three decades. They were never meant to help tuck messy emotions into neat packages. They are responses to loss that many people have, but there is not a typical response to loss as there is no typical loss. Our grief is as individual as our lives. The five stages, denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance are a part of the framework that makes up our learning to live with the one we lost. They are tools to help us frame and identify what we may be feeling. But they are not stops on some linear timeline in grief. Not everyone goes through all of them or in a prescribed order. Our hope is that with these stages comes the knowledge of grief ‘s terrain, making us better equipped to cope with life and loss. At times, people in grief will often report more stages. Just remember your grief is an unique as you are. DENIAL Denial is the first of the five stages of grief. It helps us to survive the loss. In this stage, the world becomes meaningless and overwhelming. Life makes no sense. We are in a state of shock and denial. We go numb. We wonder how we can go on, if we can go on, why we should go on. We try to find a way to simply get through each day. Denial and shock help us to cope and make survival possible. Denial helps us to pace our feelings of grief. There is a grace in denial. It is nature’s way of letting in only as much as we can handle. As you accept the reality of the loss and start to ask yourself questions, you are unknowingly beginning the healing process. You are becoming stronger, and the denial is beginning to fade. But as you proceed, all the feelings you were denying begin to surface. ANGERAnger is a necessary stage of the healing process. Be willing to feel your anger, even though it may seem endless. The more you truly feel it, the more it will begin to dissipate and the more you will heal. There are many other emotions under the anger and you will get to them in time, but anger is the emotion we are most used to managing. The truth is that anger has no limits. It can extend not only to your friends, the doctors, your family, yourself and your loved one who died, but also to God. You may ask, “Where is God in this? Underneath anger is pain, your pain. It is natural to feel deserted and abandoned, but we live in a society that fears anger. Anger is strength and it can be an anchor, giving temporary structure to the nothingness of loss. At first grief feels like being lost at sea: no connection to anything. Then you get angry at someone, maybe a person who didn’t attend the funeral, maybe a person who isn’t around, maybe a person who is different now that your loved one has died. Suddenly you have a structure – – your anger toward them. The anger becomes a bridge over the open sea, a connection from you to them. It is something to hold onto; and a connection made from the strength of anger feels better than nothing.We usually know more about suppressing anger than feeling it. The anger is just another indication of the intensity of your love. BARGAININGBefore a loss, it seems like you will do anything if only your loved one would be spared. “Please God, ” you bargain, “I will never be angry at my wife again if you’ll just let her live.” After a loss, bargaining may take the form of a temporary truce. “What if I devote the rest of my life to helping others. Then can I wake up and realize this has all been a bad dream?” We become lost in a maze of “If only…” or “What if…” statements. We want life returned to what is was; we want our loved one restored. We want to go back in time: find the tumor sooner, recognize the illness more quickly, stop the accident from happening…if only, if only, if only. Guilt is often bargaining’s companion. The “if onlys” cause us to find fault in ourselves and what we “think” we could have done differently. We may even bargain with the pain. We will do anything not to feel the pain of this loss. We remain in the past, trying to negotiate our way out of the hurt. People often think of the stages as lasting weeks or months. They forget that the stages are responses to feelings that can last for minutes or hours as we flip in and out of one and then another. We do not enter and leave each individual stage in a linear fashion. We may feel one, then another and back again to the first one. Follow me on Facebook Tweets by @iamdavidkessler DEPRESSIONAfter bargaining, our attention moves squarely into the present. Empty feelings present themselves, and grief enters our lives on a deeper level, deeper than we ever imagined. This depressive stage feels as though it will last forever. It’s important to understand that this depression is not a sign of mental illness. It is the appropriate response to a great loss. We withdraw from life, left in a fog of intense sadness, wondering, perhaps, if there is any point in going on alone? Why go on at all? Depression after a loss is too often seen as unnatural: a state to be fixed, something to snap out of. The first question to ask yourself is whether or not the situation you’re in is actually depressing. The loss of a loved one is a very depressing situation, and depression is a normal and appropriate response. To not experience depression after a loved one dies would be unusual. When a loss fully settles in your soul, the realization that your loved one didn’t get better this time and is not coming back is understandably depressing. If grief is a process of healing, then depression is one of the many necessary steps along the way. ACCEPTANCEAcceptance is often confused with the notion of being “all right” or “OK” with what has happened. This is not the case. Most people don’t ever feel OK or all right about the loss of a loved one. This stage is about accepting the reality that our loved one is physically gone and recognizing that this new reality is the permanent reality. We will never like this reality or make it OK, but eventually we accept it. We learn to live with it. It is the new norm with which we must learn to live. We must try to live now in a world where our loved one is missing. In resisting this new norm, at first many people want to maintain life as it was before a loved one died. In time, through bits and pieces of acceptance, however, we see that we cannot maintain the past intact. It has been forever changed and we must readjust. We must learn to reorganize roles, re-assign them to others or take them on ourselves. Finding acceptance may be just having more good days than bad ones. As we begin to live again and enjoy our life, we often feel that in doing so, we are betraying our loved one. We can never replace what has been lost, but we can make new connections, new meaningful relationships, new inter-dependencies. Instead of denying our feelings, we listen to our needs; we move, we change, we grow, we evolve. We may start to reach out to others and become involved in their lives. We invest in our friendships and in our relationship with ourselves. We begin to live again, but we cannot do so until we have given grief its time.

Bargaining

During the 1960, what Emeryville, California Hula-hoop company introduced the slip 'n slide, the super ball, and a do-it-yourself bomb shelter?

What's your grief? What's Your Question? Five Things You Should Know About the ‘Five Stages of Grief’ Pour yourself a heavily caffeinated beverage and settle in because today were going to talk about grief theory.  Just when you thought we were almost out of interesting topics. Once upon a time (1969) a psychiatrist name Elisabeth Kubler Ross wrote the book ‘On Death and Dying’ which introduced the world to the five stages of grief  – denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. The five stages of grief are at the basis of the ‘Kubler-Ross Model’, a theory based on Kubler-Ross’s experience and interviews with terminally ill patients. Originally this model was applied to those facing the reality of their own death (the aforementioned terminally ill patients), but before long practitioners found the constructs of this neat and tidy model fit nicely with the analysis and treatment of grieving individuals.  Since their introduction, the five stages of grief have become about as popular as any grief theory could ever hope, and they can be found in the mainstream media applied to anything from divorce to global markets. Despite the fact that the stages are often refuted in academia, the ‘Kubler-Ross Model’ seems to be the grief model for the masses.  It’s intuitive, easy to grasp, and easy to prescribe.  And prescribed it is – by that old guy at the church coffee hour, Aunt Barb, and Jimmy who lives down the street. In fact you may be here by way of a Google search prompted by your Aunt Barb who told you you’re stuck in the ‘Anger Stage’ (which only made you angrier).  Thanks Aunt Barb! I should probably tell you, if you’re waiting for me to explain the five stages I’m not going to. I f you want a better understand of the five stages of grief  you should go to David Kessler’s website grief.com.   He and Elisabeth Kubler-Ross co-authored the book On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief through the Five Stages of Loss. I’m fairly sure he can explain it a lot better than me. You may be asking your computer screen, “then what the heck is this post about?”  Well, I figure you’ve already heard about the model and many of you have already intuited  how it should be applied.   This happens all the time and unfortunately many people get it wrong and end up feeling confused and abnormal because their grief doesn’t follow the pattern. Before you decide that grief has literally made you crazy, there are a few things I think you should know. 1.  It is just a theory: There are many (many, many) grief theories; we just happen to hear about the five stages of grief so often those unfamiliar with grief models (i.e. pretty much everyone) tend to believe it’s the gold standard. The five stages of grief are not absolute truth.  Like all theory, it’s based on a hypothesis (an educated guess).  There is a bit of research to support the theory, but there is also a bit of research to contradict the theory. In reality, other grief models may fit your experience exponentially better than the ‘Kubler-Ross Model’.  We plan to explain other grief models over the next few weeks (yay, it’s a series) so if you want exposure to alternative ways to interpret your experience, follow along. At the end of the day, you may take the stages or leave them. Just please (please, please) don’t expect your grief to fall into a neat and easy pattern, formula, or timeline, and don’t think you’re abnormal or crazy if your grief doesn’t transition through the stages in an orderly fashion.  It just doesn’t work that way. 2.  It is not linear:

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On Sept 2, 1945, the Instrument of Surrender was signed by the Japanese Foreign Minister Mamoru Shigemitsu, officially ending World War II, aboard what US battleship moored in Tokyo Bay?

V-J Day - World War II - HISTORY.com Google From Pearl Harbor to Hiroshima and Nagasaki Japan’s devastating surprise aerial attack on the U.S. naval base at Pearl Harbor on Oahu, Hawaii , on December 7, 1941, capped a decade of deteriorating relations between Japan and the United States and led to an immediate U.S. declaration of war the following day. Japan’s ally Germany, led by Adolf Hitler , then declared war on the United States, turning the war raging in Europe into a truly global conflict. Over the next three years, superior technology and productivity allowed the Allies to wage an increasingly one-sided war against Japan in the Pacific, inflicting enormous casualties while suffering relatively few. By 1945, in an attempt to break Japanese resistance before a land invasion became necessary, the Allies were consistently bombarding Japan from air and sea, dropping some 100,000 tons of explosives on more than 60 Japanese cities and towns between March and July 1945 alone. Did You Know? Rhode Island is the only state with a holiday dedicated to V-J Day (its official name is Victory Day); it is celebrated on the second Monday in August. V-J Day parades are held in several other locations across the United States, including Seymour, Indiana; Moosup, Connecticut; and Arma, Kansas. The Potsdam Declaration, issued by Allied leaders on July 26, 1945, called on Japan to surrender; if it did, it was promised a peaceful government according to “the freely expressed will of the Japanese people.” If it did not, it would face “prompt and utter destruction.” The embattled Japanese government in Tokyo refused to surrender, and on August 6 the American B-29 plane Enola Gay dropped an atomic bomb on the city of Hiroshima, killing more than 70,000 people and destroying a 5-square-mile expanse of the city. Three days later, the United States dropped a second atomic bomb on Nagasaki, killing another 40,000. The following day, the Japanese government issued a statement accepting the terms of the Potsdam Declaration. In a radio address in the early afternoon of August 15 (August 14 in the United States), Emperor Hirohito urged his people to accept the surrender, blaming the use of the “new and most cruel bomb” on Hiroshima and Nagasaki for the country’s defeat. “Should we continue to fight,” Hirohito declared, “it would not only result in the ultimate collapse and obliteration of the Japanese nation but would also lead to the total extinction of human civilization.” Reaction to Japanese Surrender In Washington on August 14, President Harry S. Truman announced news of Japan’s surrender in a press conference at the White House : “This is the day we have been waiting for since Pearl Harbor. This is the day when Fascism finally dies, as we always knew it would.” Jubilant Americans declared August 14 “Victory over Japan Day,” or “V-J Day.” (May 8, 1945–when the Allies accepted Nazi Germany’s official surrender–had previously been dubbed “Victory in Europe Day,” or “V-E Day.”) Images from V-J Day celebrations around the United States and the world reflected the overwhelming sense of relief and exhilaration felt by citizens of Allied nations at the end of the long and bloody conflict. In one particularly iconic photo taken by Alfred Eisenstaedt for Life magazine, a uniformed sailor passionately kisses a nurse in the midst of a crowd of people celebrating in New York City’s Times Square. On September 2, Allied supreme commander General Douglas MacArthur , along with the Japanese foreign minister, Mamoru Shigemitsu, and the chief of staff of the Japanese army, Yoshijiro Umezu, signed the official Japanese surrender aboard the U.S. Navy battleship Missouri , effectively ending World War II . V-J Day over the Years Many V-J Day celebrations fell out of favor over the years due to concerns about their being offensive to Japan, now one of America’s closest allies, and to Japanese Americans, as well as ambivalent feelings toward the nuclear devastation of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. In 1995, the 50th anniversary of the end of World War II, the administration of President Bill Clinton referred not to V-J Day but to the “End of the Pacific War” in its official remembrance ceremonies. The controversial decision sparked complaints that Clinton was being overly deferential to Japan and that the euphemism displayed insensitivity to U.S. veterans who as prisoners of war suffered greatly at the hands of Japanese forces. Tags

USS Missouri

Tuesday saw the 70th anniversary of the start of WWII when Germany invaded what country?

World War II Fast Facts - CNN.com World War II Fast Facts CNN Library Updated 1:08 PM ET, Fri August 19, 2016 Chat with us in Facebook Messenger. Find out what's happening in the world as it unfolds. Photos: World War II in pictures German troops march through occupied Warsaw, Poland, after invading the nation on September 1, 1939, and igniting World War II. Hide Caption 1 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures German Chancellor Adolf Hitler speaks to Nazi party officials in 1939, the year of the German blitzkrieg into Poland. Denmark, Luxembourg, the Netherlands, Norway and Belgium soon fell under German control. When France came under occupation less than a year later, Britain was the only remaining Western European nation fighting the Third Reich, and the United States had not yet entered the war. Hide Caption 2 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures In Asia, Japanese troops occupy a strategic point on Chusan Island on July 14,1939, during the Sino-Japanese War. Japan signed the Tripartite Pact in 1940, formally allying with Germany and Italy, and by 1942 most of the Asian Pacific Rim had come under its domination. Hide Caption 3 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures German soldiers on the Esplanade du Trocadero view the Eiffel Tower. In June 1940, German troops marched into Paris, forcing France to capitulate and establish the pro-Axis Vichy French government. Hide Caption 4 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures British Hawker Hurricanes fly in formation during the Battle of Britain in 1940. The planes were a first line of defense against German bombers attacking England. The battle, fought between July 10 and October 31, 1940, was the first major battle to be won in the air. The Royal Air Force's victory thwarted Hitler's plans for invading Britain. Hide Caption 5 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Smoke rises behind Tower Bridge during the first mass daylight bombing of London on September 7, 1940. Hide Caption 6 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Italian dictator Benito Mussolini, left, with Hitler, center, and other leading Nazis, visits Germany during the war. Italy and Germany formed an alliance before the outbreak of war, but Italy remained a non-belligerent until June 10, 1940, when it declared war on Britain and France. Fighting spread to Greece and North Africa. Hide Caption 7 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures German tanks and infantry attack Soviet positions on the Eastern Front. On June 22, 1941, Germany broke its Non-Aggression Pact with the Soviet Union, launching the bloodiest theater of the war. Though the estimates vary greatly, Russia suffered the most war casualties of any nation in World War II -- as many as 13.8 million military deaths. Estimates of civilian deaths from military action, crimes against humanity, starvation and disease are as high as 9 million. Hide Caption 8 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures A view of U.S. ships in Pearl Harbor, Hawaii, after the Japanese attack on December 7, 1941. The USS West Virginia and USS Tennessee are in the foreground. The attack destroyed more than half the fleet of aircraft and damaged or destroyed eight battleships. Japan also attacked Clark and Iba airfields in the Philippines, destroying more than half the U.S. Army's aircraft there. Hide Caption 9 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt signs the declaration of war against Japan on December 8, 1941. Italy and Germany immediately declared war on the United States, and on December 11, Roosevelt signed the U.S. declarations of war against those nations. Hide Caption Photos: World War II in pictures British prisoners of war leave Hong Kong for a Japanese prison camp in December 1941. Hide Caption 11 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Anti-aircraft fire glows over Algiers during a night raid on November 23, 1942. In 1942, the Allies stopped the Axis advance in North Africa and the Soviet Union. Hide Caption 12 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Black smoke rises from demolished buildings after Japanese air forces attacked the U.S. Navy base on Midway Atoll during the Battle of Midway in June 1942. The four-day battle became a major victory for the U.S. Navy, which sunk four Japanese aircraft carriers, and it marked a turning point in the war in the Pacific. Hide Caption 13 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Balloon operators from Britain's Women's Auxiliary Air Force, or WAAF, report for inspection in a hangar used to store balloons, at a facility in the UK. During World War II, women played a significant role in the war effort. They took jobs in "defense plants and volunteered for war-related organizations, in addition to managing their households," according to the World War II museum in New Orleans. Hide Caption 14 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures British troops land near Algiers, Algeria, during Operation Torch in November 1942. Operation Torch was the British-American invasion of Vichy-held French North Africa, and marked the first major action by the Western allies against the German army. Hide Caption 15 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Soviet soldiers advance against the German army during the Battle of Stalingrad. The battle for the city on the Volga River (present-day Volgograd) was a major defeat for Germany and a turning point in the war. The battle lasted more than five months, ending in February 1943, at the cost of at least 160,000 German soldiers killed or captured. However, even conservative estimates of Russian casualties are much higher. Hide Caption 16 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures German prisoners captured at the beachhead of Anzio, Italy, leave a landing craft on their way to a prison camp in 1944. The amphibious landing and ensuing battle helped Allied forces break a months-long stalemate south of Rome and ultimately defeat the Germans in Italy. Hide Caption 17 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures French refugees live in a quarry near Fleury sur Orne. During the bombing in that area, 20,000 refugees lived in the quarries. Hide Caption 18 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures U.S. troops assault Omaha Beach during the invasion of Normandy on June 6, 1944. On D-Day, Allied forces landed on five beaches -- Utah, Omaha, Juno, Gold and Sword -- taking the first step in establishing the Western Front in Europe. The landing included more than 5,000 ships, 11,000 airplanes and 150,000 soldiers. More than 35,000 Allied troops were killed during the Normandy Campaign, which lasted till the end of August 1944. Hide Caption 19 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures A crowd gathers to cheer Gen. Charles de Gaulle at the Place de la Concorde on August 26, 1944, a day after the liberation of Paris. Hide Caption 20 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Soldiers of an infantry division move into the mist over a snow-covered field near Krinkelter, Belgium, on December 20, 1944, during the Battle of the Bulge, a surprise German counter-offensive against Allied forces as they closed in on German soil from the west. It resulted in more combined U.S. losses (nearly 90,000 killed, wounded or captured) than any battle of the war. Hide Caption 21 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures U.S. Marines of the 28th Regiment, 5th Division, raise the American flag atop Mount Suribachi, Iwo Jima, on February 23, 1945. Strategically located only 660 miles from Tokyo, the Pacific island was essential to launching land-based bombers against Japan. It was the bloodiest battle in the history of the U.S. Marine Corps, which suffered more than 27,000 casualties. Of some 18,000 Japanese soldiers defending the island, 216 survived. Hide Caption 22 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures German prisoners captured at Friedrichsfeld march through a town in Germany after the crossing of the Rhine River by the U.S. 9th Army on March 26, 1945. Hide Caption 23 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures From left, British Prime Minister Winston Churchill, U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt and Russian Premier Joseph Stalin at the Yalta Conference on February 1945. Hide Caption 24 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Prisoners line block 61 of Buchenwald concentration camp in April 1945. The construction of Buchenwald started July 15, 1937, and the camp was liberated by U.S. Gen. George Patton's troops on April 11, 1945. Between 239,000 and 250,000 people were imprisoned in the camp. About 56,000 died, including 11,000 Jews. Hide Caption 25 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures President Franklin D. Roosevelt's funeral procession goes down Connecticut Avenue on its way to the White House. Roosevelt died on April 12, 1945, in Warm Springs, Georgia, just weeks before Germany's surrender. Hide Caption 26 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Harry S. Truman takes the oath of office on April 12, 1945, as he becomes the 33rd president of the United States. Standing beside him are his wife, Bess, and daughter Margaret. Hide Caption 27 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures The bodies of Benito Mussolini, left, and his mistress, Clara Petacci, second from left, hang from the roof of a gasoline station after they were shot by anti-Fascist forces while attempting to escape to Switzerland on April 28, 1945. Hide Caption 28 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Russian soldiers wave their flag, made from tablecloths, over the ruins of the Reichstag in Berlin on April 30, 1945. That day, as the Soviets were within blocks of his bunker at the Reich Chancellery, Adolf Hitler committed suicide. Hide Caption 29 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures British Prime Minister Winston Churchill addresses the celebrating crowds from the balcony of the Ministry of Health in Whitehall, London, on V-E Day, May 8, 1945. The war in Europe was officially over. Hide Caption 30 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Soldiers rush an injured U.S. Marine from a battlefield during the Battle of Okinawa in June 1945. The battle, the bloodiest of the war in the Pacific, raged for nearly three months and heightened U.S. concerns for the enormous casualties that could be anticipated in the planned invasion of Japan's main islands. Hide Caption 31 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures A photograph on display at the Bradbury Science Museum shows the first instant of the first atomic bomb test, on July 16, 1945, at 5:29 a.m. at Trinity Site in New Mexico. The Potsdam Declaration, announced 10 days later, called for Japan's unconditional surrender, threatening "prompt and utter destruction." It did not, however, specifically mention the bomb. Hide Caption 32 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Col. Paul W. Tibbets Jr., center, stands with the ground crew of the B-29 bomber "Enola Gay," which Tibbets piloted on August 6, 1945. The atomic bomb dropped on Hiroshima, Japan, that day killed an estimated 130,000 people. Hide Caption 34 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures A patient suffering severe radiation burns lies in the Hiroshima Red Cross hospital in August 1945. Many of those who survived the initial blast on August 6 died of severe radiation-related injuries and illnesses. Hide Caption 35 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures A dense column of smoke rises more than 60,000 feet into the air over Nagasaki, the result of an atomic bomb dropped on August 9, 1945. An estimated 60,000 to 70,000 were killed in the Nagasaki blast. Six days later, a little after noon local time on August 15, Emperor Hirohito's announcement that Japan had accepted the terms of the Potsdam Declaration was broadcast on radio. Japan had surrendered. Hide Caption 36 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures A jubilant American sailor kisses a nurse in New York's Times Square on August 14, 1945, as he celebrates the news that Japan has surrendered. (Because of the time difference between the two nations, the surrender occurred August 15 in Japan). Hide Caption 37 of 38 Photos: World War II in pictures Japanese Foreign Minister Mamoru Shigemitsu signs the Japanese Instrument of Surrender on the deck of the battleship USS Missouri in Tokyo Bay on September 2, 1945, officially bringing World War II to an end. Overseeing the surrender is U.S. Gen. Douglas McArthur (right, back to camera). Hide Caption

i don't know

In literature, who is John Clayton III, son of Lord and Lady Greystroke?

John Clayton III (a.k.a. Tarzan), Viscount Greystoke - eRepublik Official Wiki John Clayton III (a.k.a. Tarzan), Viscount Greystoke From eRepublik Official Wiki This page is a lonely page You can help by adding links pointing to it. Notes: Adding {{ LangMenu }} template or linking it from your user page is not solution for this problem. This template will be removed by sysops upon the article is not considered to be lonely anymore. This is a warning before deletion! Dear editor, You have started a page without enough data or without proper formatting. An article should have text, a template , proper formatting , an image, and, if applicable, follow the guidelines for non-English pages. If you do not comply with the notice in 14 days, this page will be deleted. You have 0 days before this page is deleted. This template was added on 26 August 2016 by Sre8renica for the following reason: Lonely page, no such citizen This article contains fictional information. John Clayton III (a.k.a. Tarzan), Viscount Greystoke Society

Tarzan

Ottawa is the national capitol of Canada. In what province is Ottawa located?

The Legend of Tarzan (2016) - IMDb IMDb There was an error trying to load your rating for this title. Some parts of this page won't work property. Please reload or try later. X Beta I'm Watching This! Keep track of everything you watch; tell your friends. Error The Legend of Tarzan ( 2016 ) PG-13 | Watch Now From $2.99 (HD) on Amazon Video Tarzan, having acclimated to life in London, is called back to his former home in the jungle to investigate the activities at a mining encampment. Director: a list of 37 titles created 27 Jun 2014 a list of 28 titles created 25 Aug 2014 a list of 25 titles created 08 Nov 2015 a list of 42 titles created 13 Dec 2015 a list of 25 titles created 2 weeks ago Title: The Legend of Tarzan (2016) 6.3/10 Want to share IMDb's rating on your own site? Use the HTML below. You must be a registered user to use the IMDb rating plugin. As an Orc horde invades the planet Azeroth using a magic portal, a few human heroes and dissenting Orcs must attempt to stop the true evil behind this war. Director: Duncan Jones The Four Horsemen resurface and are forcibly recruited by a tech genius to pull off their most impossible heist yet. Director: Jon M. Chu After the re-emergence of the world's first mutant, world-destroyer Apocalypse, the X-Men must unite to defeat his extinction level plan. Director: Bryan Singer Two decades after the first Independence Day invasion, Earth is faced with a new extra-Solar threat. But will mankind's new space defenses be enough? Director: Roland Emmerich After facing Shredder, who has joined forces with mad scientist Baxter Stockman and henchmen Bebop and Rocksteady to take over the world, the Turtles must confront an even greater nemesis: the notorious Krang. Director: Dave Green A secret government agency recruits some of the most dangerous incarcerated super-villains to form a defensive task force. Their first mission: save the world from the apocalypse. Director: David Ayer After he reconnects with an awkward pal from high school through Facebook, a mild-mannered accountant is lured into the world of international espionage. Director: Rawson Marshall Thurber The USS Enterprise crew explores the furthest reaches of uncharted space, where they encounter a new ruthless enemy who puts them and everything the Federation stands for to the test. Director: Justin Lin The CIA's most dangerous former operative is drawn out of hiding to uncover more explosive truths about his past. Director: Paul Greengrass Fearing that the actions of Superman are left unchecked, Batman takes on the Man of Steel, while the world wrestles with what kind of a hero it really needs. Director: Zack Snyder Eric and fellow warrior Sara, raised as members of ice Queen Freya's army, try to conceal their forbidden love as they fight to survive the wicked intentions of both Freya and her sister Ravenna. Director: Cedric Nicolas-Troyan Political interference in the Avengers' activities causes a rift between former allies Captain America and Iron Man. Directors: Anthony Russo, Joe Russo Stars: Chris Evans, Robert Downey Jr., Scarlett Johansson Edit Storyline John Clayton following his parents' death in Africa would be raised by an ape and would be known by the name Tarzan, would leave Africa and go to his parents's home in England along with woman he fell in love with and married, Jane Porter. He would be asked by Belgian King Leopold to go to Africa to see what he has done there to help the country. Initially he refuses. But an American, George Washington Williams wants him to accept so he can accompany him. He says that Leopold might be committing all sorts of atrocities to achieve his goal like slavery. He needs to prove it. Clayton agrees and his wife insists that she accompany him because she misses Africa. They go and when they arrive a man named Rom who works for Leopold attacks the village they are at and captures Tarzan and Jane. With Washington's help he escapes and sets out to rescue Jane by going across the jungle and Washington joins him despite being told that he might not make it. . Written by rcs0411@yahoo.com A new threat awaits See more  » Genres: Motion Picture Rating ( MPAA ) Rated PG-13 for sequences of action and violence, some sensuality and brief rude dialogue | See all certifications  » Parents Guide: 1 July 2016 (USA) See more  » Also Known As: $38,135,000 (USA) (1 July 2016) Gross: Did You Know? Trivia Warner Bros. had previously done the highly expensive Greystoke: The Legend of Tarzan, Lord of the Apes (1984) a few decades earlier, which was only a modest success at the box office, and they were understandably nervous about embarking on another large scale version 32 years later. See more » Goofs While having dinner with Jane, Rom mentions that during his last visit to Europe he attended lectures by the King of France and Henry Morton Stanley at Sorbonne University. Although the French monarchy was abolished before Stanley's 1871 voyages, several men from the Bourbon family were regarded as king by die-hard royalists. See more » Quotes Captain Moulle : Form your lines... Belgian Soldier : [the gatling gun is rolled forward] Maxim ready, sir! The Legend of Tarzan is Magnifique! 30 June 2016 | by whitewitch-72521 – See all my reviews I just experienced The Legend of Tarzan, and in the immortal words of the Countess Olga de Coude "Magnifique!" is the only thing that I can think. Sadly, I arrived at the theater for the early release of TLOT to an empty theater. I sat alone in the center of the empty theater reading my copy of The Return of Tarzan quietly in wait for the movie to begin. Slowly a few other viewers trickled in but sadly, the theater might as well have been completely empty. The previews for other movies came and went as previews do and then the opening of this long awaited Tarzan began. I sat in rapture as Edgar Rice Burroughs Tarzan came to life in front of my eyes. Yes, It IS ERB's Tarzan. There are liberties that Mr. Yates took with the characters and locations, but all in all, THIS IS TARZAN as he was meant to be. Quiet, Strong, Passionate, steely eyed... "Magnifique!" The Mangani are Mangani. They are not chimps nor gorillas. They are huge, magnificent beasts. Were Mr. Burroughs alive today, I wholeheartedly believe that he would jump up and down like a young child shouting "YES! YES! That's them!" Kala is every child's mother, protective and loving. The relationship between Tarzan and her is perfectly portrayed. The love Tarzan feels for his ape mother is passed on to the movie viewer to be felt, not just seen. The panoramic views of the jungle are even as ERB described them to be. Dark, foreboding, beautiful and deadly. It is the jungle of Tarzan. This is not an action movie in the vein of Captain America or any of the modern action movies. It is a story. A very well told story of adventure driven by the love of a man for his mate. Is there action? Of course there is action. It wouldn't be Tarzan without action. But first and foremost, it is a very well written and delivered story. It is a story that Edgar Rice Burroughs himself would have told. He would be proud and finally relieved that his creation had finally come to life in a manner that does justice to his creative genius. I sat through the movie mesmerized. Spellbound. It ended just like it should, you won't be disappointed. As the credits began to roll, I quietly stood up, still in a mostly empty theater, and walked out to my awaiting truck to drive home and write this review. If people listen to the critics who did not like this movie, they will be missing out. For those of us who love the works of Edgar Rice Burroughs, GO SEE THIS MOVIE! I wish I could say more, there is so much to say. I'll end this with this. I'll go see it again, and again and when it comes out on DVD, I'll own it and watch it till I have seen it as many times as I have read the books, which is really saying something. 128 of 232 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you? Yes

i don't know

What product was advertised with the slogan “Does she…or doesn’t she?”

Advertising: She Does - TIME Advertising: She Does Google+ "Does she ... or doesn't she?" asks one of advertising's most familiar and titillating slogans. The question, as every reader of advertisements knows, refers to artificial hair color—and the odds on an affirmative answer have dropped from 15 to 1 to 2 to 1 since Miss Clairol first asked it eleven years ago. Sales of tints, rinses and dyes have risen from $25 million to $186 mil lion a year. So popular is their use that some states no longer require women to list their hair color on their driver's licenses. Now industry-leading Bristol-Myers' Clairol division, whose Miss... To continue reading:

Clairol

Ben and Jerry's recently announced that they were changing the name of their Chubby Hubby ice cream to what new name for the month of September?

Express Logo Design, Famous Advertising Slogans 1. Ask a question: Does she or doesn't she? - Clairol 2. Show your unique commitment : We try harder - Avis 3. Explain product superiority: Takes a licking and keeps on ticking - Timex 4. Evoke a benefit in a fresh way: Let your fingers do the walking - Yellow Pages 5. Use an emotive call to action: Reach out and touch someone - AT&T 6. Use an evocative call to action: Put a tiger in your tank - Esso 7. Use an imperative call to action: Just do it - Nike 8. Use a one-word call to action: Think - IBM 9. Use a cheeky call to action: Let us tan your hide - Crisby Frisian Fur Co. 10. Revisit a familiar call to action: Reach out and bust someone - Crime Stoppers 11. Link a product feature with an abstract need: A diamond is forever - DeBeers 12. Link a feature with your address: We corner the market - Irving Rivers Ltd. 13. Combine a feature and a benefit in the same phrase: Make yourself at home - IKEA 14. Declare a superlative feature: The world's #1 selling financial software - Quicken 15. Make a compelling promise: The world on time - Federal Express 16. Be whimsical: It's the real thing - Coca-Cola 17. Say it staccato: Soothes. Cleanses. Refreshes. - Murine eyedrops 18. Use a two-fold delivery with a twist Common sense: Uncommon results - David Ingram and Associates 19. Address a specific need: For women whose eyes are older than they are - Robert Powers Skin Cream 20. Be abstract but client-centered: After all, it is your information - Authentex Software 21. Describe your product in a novel way: Liquid jewelry - Lorr Laboratories Nail Polish 22. Link company name to product benefit: Never forgets - Elephant Memory Systems 23. Suggest the cost of not using your product: Because so much is riding on your tires - Michelin 24. Be grotesque to make a point: Wears like a pig's nose - W. M. Finck & Co. Men's Overalls 25. Turn a current business maxim on its ear: Think small -Volkswagen 26. Link a well-known phrase with your product benefit: Understanding comes with Time - Time Magazine 27. Brag about yourself: We take the world's greatest pictures - Nikon 28. Brag about your product and your client: You and Betty Crocker can bake someone happy - Betty Crocker 29. Take a breath and say it all: Finest anti-knock, non-premium gasoline ever offered at no extra cost - Union Oil Co. 30. Describe your service and its #1 benefit in two words: Advertising pays - Industry Maxim 31. Personify your product: Laughs at time - Du Pont Paint 32. Distill your business into one phrase: The Document Company - Xerox Corp. 33. Tie your slogan to your logo: Get a piece of the Rock - Prudential Insurance Co. 34. Dare to be different: Dare to diff - LOEB Col  

i don't know

On Sept 4, 1998, Google is founded by fellow students Sergey Brin and Larry Page. At what university were they classmates?

Our history in depth – Company – Google 1995-1997 1995 Larry Page and Sergey Brin meet at Stanford. Larry, 22, a U Michigan grad, is considering the school; Sergey, 21, is assigned to show him around. 1996 Larry and Sergey begin collaborating on a search engine called BackRub . BackRub operates on Stanford servers for more than a year—eventually taking up too much bandwidth. 1997 Google.com is registered as a domain on September 15. The name—a play on the word "googol," a mathematical term for the number represented by the numeral 1 followed by 100 zeros—reflects Larry and Sergey's mission to organize a seemingly infinite amount of information on the web. 1998 April Larry launches a monthly " Google Friends Newsletter " to inform fans about company news. (We've since shut down Google Friends Newsletter in favor of blogs, Google+ and other methods of sharing news .) August Sun co-founder Andy Bechtolsheim writes a check for $100,000 to an entity that doesn't exist yet—a company called Google Inc. Before heading to the Burning Man festival in the Nevada desert, Larry and Sergey incorporate the iconic Man into the logo to keep people informed about where the Google crew would be for a few days—our first doodle . September On September 4, Google files for incorporation in California. Larry and Sergey open a bank account in the newly-established company's name and deposit Andy Bechtolsheim's check. Google sets up workspace in Susan Wojcicki's garage on Santa Margarita Ave., Menlo Park, Calif. Larry and Sergey hire their first employee. Craig Silverstein is a fellow CS grad student at Stanford who works at Google for 10+ years before joining education startup Khan Academy. December "PC Magazine" reports that Google "has an uncanny knack for returning extremely relevant results" and recognizes us as the search engine of choice in the Top 100 Web Sites for 1998. 1999 February We outgrow our garage office and move to new digs at 165 University Avenue in Palo Alto with just eight employees. April Yoshka, our first "company" dog, comes to work with our senior vice president of operations, Urs Hölzle. May Omid Kordestani joins to run sales—employee #11. Ten years later, Omid steps down from his active role in the company, becoming a senior advisor. June Our first press release announces a $25 million round from Sequoia Capital and Kleiner Perkins; John Doerr and Michael Moritz join the board. August We move to our first Mountain View location: 2400 Bayshore . Mountain View is a few miles south of Stanford University, and north of the older towns of Silicon Valley: Sunnyvale, Santa Clara, San Jose. November We hire our first chef, Charlie Ayers (his previous claim to fame was catering for the Grateful Dead; he now owns a cafe in Palo Alto). Today Google's food programs focus on providing healthy, sustainably sourced food to fuel Googlers around the world. 2000 April We announce the MentalPlex : Google's ability to read your mind as you visualize the search results you want. Thus begins our annual foray in the Silicon Valley tradition of April 1 hoaxes. May We win our first Webby Awards: Technical Achievement (voted by judges) and Peoples' Voice (voted by users). We run a series of doodles featuring a little alien—our first doodle series and the first doodle not associated with any particular event. The first 10 language versions of Google.com are released : French, German, Italian, Swedish, Finnish, Spanish, Portuguese, Dutch, Norwegian and Danish. Today, search is available in 150+ languages. July Our first international doodle celebrates Bastille Day in France. September Google New York starts in a Starbucks on 86th Street with a one-person sales "team." Today, more than 4,000 Googlers work in our New York office, a former Port Authority building at 111 Eighth Avenue. We start offering search in Chinese, Japanese and Korean—bringing our total number of supported languages to 15. October Google AdWords launches with 350 customers. The self-service ad program promises online activation with a credit card, keyword targeting and performance feedback. The first doodle by a guest artist, Lorie Loeb , goes live. Since then, many artists have lent their talents to the Google homepage, from Wayne Thiebaud to Christoph Niemann to Eric Carle. December Google Toolbar is released—a browser plug-in that makes it possible to search without visiting the Google homepage. 2001 February In our first public acquisition, we acquire Deja.com's Usenet Discussion Service, an archive of 500 million Usenet discussions dating back to 1995. We add search and browse features and launch it as Google Groups . March Eric Schmidt is named chairman of the board of directors. April Swedish Chef becomes a language preference in search. We offer several "joke" languages, including Klingon. July Google Images launches, initially offering access to 250 million images. August We open our first international office, in Tokyo, Japan . Eric Schmidt becomes our CEO. Larry and Sergey are named presidents of products and technology, respectively. December We release our first annual Google Zeitgeist , a visual look at what millions of people searched for over the year just ending. It's a revealing look at the year that was, from "Harry Potter" to "Osama Bin Laden." We continue to release Zeitgeist every year. 2002 February The first Google product for enterprises is released: the Google Search Appliance is a yellow box that businesses can plug into their computer network to enable search capabilities for their own documents. We release a major overhaul for AdWords , including new cost-per-click pricing. April We release the first set of Google APIs, enabling developers to query more than 2 billion web documents and program in their favorite environment, including Java, Perl and Visual Studio. May We release Google Labs, which let people try out beta technologies and was the proving ground for many Google features, such as Google Transit, Google Scholar and Google Trends. Nearly 10 years later, we wind down Google Labs in order to prioritize our product efforts. September Google News launches with 4,000 news sources. Today Google News includes 50,000+ news sources, with 70 regional editions in different languages. All told, Google News and other services send publishers 6 billion clicks per month as of 2012. October A few months after our first employee in Australia starts selling AdWords from her lounge room, we open our office in Sydney —the second office after Japan in APAC. Our first local AdWords client is eBay Australia. December With the launch of Froogle (which became Google Shopping in 2012), people can search for stuff to buy. 2003 February We acquire Pyra Labs, the creators of Blogger . Nearly as old as Google itself (Blogger started in 1999), today more than 300 million people visit Blogger every month. March We announce Google AdSense , a new content-targeted advertising service that enables publishers large and small to access Google's vast network of advertisers. (The following month, we acquire Applied Semantics, whose technology bolsters the service named AdSense.) April We launch Google Grants —the nonprofit edition of AdWords, which provides nonprofit organizations with $10,000 per month in in-kind AdWords advertising to promote their iniatives. October Registration opens for programmers to compete for cash prizes and recognition at the first ever Code Jam. Today, Google Code Jam attracts tens of thousands of contestants each year, and the finals have traveled to Tokyo, Dublin, London and New York City. December We launch Google Print (now known as Google Books ), indexing small excerpts from books to appear in search results. In 2004, the program expands through digital scanning partnerships with libraries. To date, we've scanned more than 20 million books. We launch Orkut , in its heyday the most important social network in several countries. March We move to the new "Googleplex" at 1600 Amphitheatre Parkway in Mountain View with 800+ employees. We introduce Google Local, offering relevant neighborhood business listings, maps, and directions. (Eventually, Local is combined with Google Maps.) April We launch Gmail on April Fools' Day. At first invite-only, today it boasts more than 425 million users. Fun fact: our internal code name for Gmail was "Caribou," inspired by a Dilbert cartoon. The Official Google Blog goes live. Today, we offer a wide variety of ways —including Google+ pages and Twitter accounts—for people to get news from Google, in many different languages. May We announce the first winners of the Google Anita Borg Scholarship , awarded to outstanding women studying computer science. Today these scholarships are open to students in Africa, Asia, Australia, Canada, Europe, India, Middle East, New Zealand, and the United States. July We acquire Picasa , which helps people organize and display photos online. August Our Initial Public Offering of 19,605,052 shares of Class A common stock takes place on Wall Street. Opening price: $85 per share. September Our Hong Kong office is the first Google office to open in the Greater China region. October We acquire Keyhole, a digital mapping company whose technology will later become Google Earth . Google SMS launches. This service enabled users to send text search queries to GOOGL or 466453 on mobile devices. We formally open our European headquarters in Dublin, Ireland , with 150 multilingual Googlers, a visit from Sergey and Larry, and recognition from the Deputy Prime Minister of Ireland, Mary Harney. We open our new offices in Bangalore and Hyderabad , India. Googlers in India have worked on products ranging from Map Maker to ads to Chrome. November We launch Google Scholar in beta. This free service helps people search scholarly literature such as peer-reviewed papers, theses, books, preprints, abstracts and technical reports. December We establish Google.org , dedicated to the idea that technology can help make the world a better place. 2005 February Google Maps goes live. Just two months later, we add satellite views and directions to the product. April Google Maps comes to mobile phones in the U.S., offering driving directions and local information to people on the go. Our first Google Maps release in Europe is geared to U.K. users. France, Germany, Italy and Spain follow in 2006. Today, we offer driving directions in 190+ countries around the world. The first video goes up on YouTube (not yet part of Google). Today, 100+ hours of video are uploaded every minute and people watch 6 billion hours of video per month! May Personalized Homepage (later iGoogle and no longer available as of November 2013) was designed for people to customize their own Google homepage with content modules. June Google Mobile Web Search is released, specially formulated for viewing search results on mobile phones. We unveil Google Earth , a satellite imagery-based mapping service that lets you take a virtual journey to any location in the world. Google Earth has since been downloaded more than 1 billion times. The Google Maps API is released; developers can embed Google Maps on many kinds of mapping services and sites. Today there are 1 million active websites and apps using the API, reaching 1 billion people every week. August We launch Google Talk, a downloadable application that lets Gmail users to talk or instant message with friends quickly and easily; Chat comes to Gmail the following year. In 2013, we announce that Talk will be rolled into Hangouts , Google's new single communications system. October Googlers volunteer to produce an author event with Malcolm Gladwell in Mountain View. Since then, the Talks at Google program has hosted 1,500+ authors and other thought leaders in 18 offices. November We release Google Analytics for measuring the impact of websites and marketing campaigns. Analytics is based on Urchin, a company we acquired in March 2005. We announce the opening of our offices in São Paulo and Mexico City —our first in Latin America. The first Doodle 4 Google contest takes place in the United Kingdom. Since then, we've run Doodle 4 Google contests in countries across six continents, with more than 1 million doodles submitted by students eager for the chance to see their artwork on the Google homepage. December Google Transit launches in the Portland, Ore. metro area. Today, Transit has schedules for more than 1 million public transit stops worldwide. 2006 March Google Finance launches—complete with interactive charts and related headlines from Google News—to help people to find financial information more easily. April We launch Google Calendar to help you keep track of events, special occasions and appointments, and to share schedules with others. Google Translate launches, offering translations between Arabic and English. Today our machine translation service provides translations between 70+ different languages. May We release Google Trends , a way to visualize the popularity of searches over time. Gmail launches in Arabic and Hebrew, bringing the number of interfaces up to 40. June We announce Google Checkout, a fast and easy way to pay for online purchases which paved the way for broader payments with Google Wallet . Picasa Web Albums enables Picasa users to upload and share their photos online. The Oxford English Dictionary adds the word "Google" (as a verb). August Google Apps for Your Domain is released. This suite of applications, including Gmail and Calendar, is the precursor to Google Apps Premier Edition , which launched later in the year and brings cloud computing to businesses. Today, more than 5 million businesses are using Google Apps. October We launch Apps for Education ; our first deployment is to Arizona State University. Today Apps for EDU has more than 25 million users, and is being used by 74 of the top 100 universities. We release web-based applications Docs & Spreadsheets (now called Docs and Sheets ). Docs is a reworking of Writely (acquired in March). We announce our acquisition of YouTube . 2007 January "Fortune" announces its annual list of Best Companies to Work For and Google is #1 (we've been on top of the list three other years since). We're proud we've been able to create a company culture where employees are empowered to do cool things that matter. February This year’s Valentine's Day doodle causes a stir. Many people think we left out the "l" and linked it to a 17th century poet named Googe; others think it's homage to a band called My Bloody Valentine (the bassist's last name is Googe). Many of the 2008 Presidential candidates—including then-Senator Barack Obama and Senator John McCain— visit the Googleplex throughout the campaign. We add traffic information to Google Maps for 30+ cities around the U.S. Today, live traffic data is available in 50+ countries, covering highways, streets and more in 600+ major cities. March The first "gBikes" appear on campus, giving Googlers an efficient, convenient and healthy way to get to and from meetings. Today around 700 bikes are on campus at any given moment—just one sign of Google's cycling-friendly culture. April This April Fools' Day is extra busy: not only do we introduce the Gmail Paper Archive and TiSP (Toilet Internet Service Provider) —we lose (and find) a real snake in our New York office! GOOG-411 enabled people to dial a phone number and speak a search for local information. May Street View debuts in Google Maps in five U.S. cities: New York, San Francisco, Las Vegas, Miami, and Denver. Today, Street View is available in more than 50 countries. We kick off an effort to help protect people from malicious content on the Internet. Today, approximately 1 billion people use Google Safe Browsing , which extends not only to Google’s search results and ads, but also to popular web browsers such as Chrome, Firefox and Safari, on mobile and desktop. We expand the YouTube Partnership Program to include some of the most popular and prolific original content creators from the YouTube community. Today more than 1 million channels earn revenue from the program. We announce new strides taken towards universal search. Now video, news, books, image and local results are all integrated together in one search result. June We install solar panels on our Mountain View campus—the largest corporate solar panel installation of its kind at the time. Today the solar panels power 30 percent of the buildings they sit on. We unveil a new green initiative aimed at accelerating the adoption of plug-in hybrid electric vehicles. We later retire the RechargeIT initiative , though we continue to offer electric vehicles as part of our employee car sharing service. September AdSense for Mobile is introduced, giving sites optimized for mobile browsers the ability to host the same ads as standard websites. We add a new application for making slide presentations to Google Docs. November We announce Android —the first open platform for mobile devices—and a collaboration with other companies in the Open Handset Alliance. Renewable Energy Less Than Coal (RE<C) was an initiative designed to create electricity from renewable sources that are cheaper than coal. The program has been retired, but we continue to apply what we learned to other renewable energy projects. 2008 January The BOLD Internship program launches, providing opportunities to students historically underrepresented in tech. Combined with our other internships , over the years thousands of students have had the chance have an impact at Google, on projects from engineering to sales. March We complete the acquisition of DoubleClick , a digital marketing company that provides ad management technology for agencies, marketers and publishers. May We host the first Google I/O , our annual developer conference, in San Francisco. I/O has grown since then; in addition to the thousands of developers who join us in person every year, millions of people tune in via live stream to hear the latest news on products. June The first GoogleServe—our global week of service—takes place. Every year, Googlers leave their inboxes behind to participate in projects that give back to the community. Google Map Maker launches, enabling people to directly update geographic information in Google Maps and Google Earth—helping ensure that the map accurately reflects the world. Today Map Maker is available in 200+ countries and territories across the globe. July We provide Street View for the entire 2008 Tour de France route—the first launch of Street View imagery in Europe. Our first downloadable iPhone app, enabling quicker mobile searching , debuts with the launch of the Apple 3G iPhone. August We launch a site dedicated to the 2008 U.S. elections. In 2012, we take this effort to the next level with Google.com/elections , providing news and online tools for elections worldwide. Google Suggest (later called Autocomplete) arrives on Google.com, helping formulate queries, reduce spelling errors and reducing keystrokes. Street View is available in several cities in Japan and Australia—the first time it's appeared outside of North America or Europe. September T-Mobile announces the G1, the first phone built on the Android operating system. Google Chrome becomes available for download, one day after a comic book announcing our new browser leaks onto the web. Five years later, Chrome boasts more than 750 million users. November The updated Google Mobile App for iPhone makes it possible for you to do a Google web search using only your voice. After we discover a correlation between certain search queries and CDC data on flu symptoms, we release Google Flu Trends , an indicator of flu activity around the U.S. as much as two weeks earlier than traditional flu surveillance systems. 2009 February Our first message on Twitter gets back to binary: I'm 01100110 01100101 01100101 01101100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01101100 01110101 01100011 01101011 01111001 00001010. (Hint: it's a button on our homepage.) We launch Voice Search on Android . Android users can start searching by voice with the touch of a button, making mobile web surfing easy and fast. March We release Google Voice , which improves the way you use your phone, with features like voicemail transcription. In 2013, we announce that Voice will be integrated into Google+ Hangouts. We announce Google Ventures , a venture capital fund aimed at using our resources to support innovation and encourage promising new technology companies. In 2013, Google Ventures added its 200th portfolio company. We launch a beta test of interest-based advertising on partner sites and on YouTube. This kind of tailored advertising lets us show ads more closely related to users' interests, and it gives advertisers an efficient way to reach those most likely to be interested in their products or services. April Our April Fools' Day prank this year is CADIE, our "Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity" who spends the day taking over various Google products before self-destructing. May To clear brush and reduce fire hazard in the fields near our Mountain View headquarters, we rent some goats from a local company. They help us trim the grass the low-carbon way. July We (literally) take the beta label off both the enterprise and consumer versions of Gmail, Google Calendar, Google Docs and Google Talk. We announce that we're developing Google Chrome OS , an open source, lightweight operating system initially targeted at laptops. September We introduce the DoubleClick Ad Exchange , a real-time marketplace that helps large online publishers on one side; and ad networks and agency networks on the other, buy and sell display advertising space. On the birthday of the "father of science fiction," we unveil the truth behind a mysterious series of doodles in tribute to H.G. Wells. October Google Maps Navigation is a turn-by-turn GPS navigation system with 3D views, voice guidance and live traffic data. November We release an international series of doodles for the 40th anniversary of "Sesame Street." December Just in time for the holidays we roll out Mac and Linux versions of Google Chrome , as well as extensions for Chrome in Windows and Linux (all in beta). 2010 January We introduce the Nexus One to show what's possible on Android devices. The Nexus line of devices has since grown and now includes tablets as well as phones. In response to the Haiti earthquake, engineers build Person Finder to connect loved ones in the wake of disasters. We've since launched Person Finder for other crises—including the Tōhoku earthquake and tsunami in Japan—and formed Google Crisis Response , a team that responds to global disasters. After detecting a sophisticated cyberattack from China, we announce we are no longer willing to continue censoring our services on Google.cn, our local domain. Today, users in mainland China can access search via Google.com.hk. February The first-ever Google Super Bowl ad tells a love story through search terms. This is one of many videos made to celebrate the human side of search. We announce a plan to build and test ultra high-speed broadband networks , delivering Internet speeds up to 100 times faster than what most Americans have access to today. More than 1,000 communities submit proposals in response. March Bike directions and bike trail data come to Google Maps . Today, there are more than 330,000 miles (530,000 kilometers) of biking trails and paths in Google Maps to help you get around on your two wheels. April We change our name to Topeka for April Fools' Day—a tribute to Topeka, Kansas, which changed its name to Google as part of an effort to bring Fiber to that city. We're the first company to launch a website publishing the number of requests we get from governments to provide information about our users or to remove content from Google products. Later in the year, we add visualizations showing disruptions in visitor traffic to our products, such as a government blocking access or a cable being cut. May As part of our efforts to accelerate the deployment of renewable energy, we make our first direct investment in a utility-scale renewable energy project. Google TV is built on Android and Chrome and gives you an easy and fast way to navigate to television channels, websites, apps, shows and movies. In celebration of PAC-MAN’s 30th birthday, we release our first-ever playable doodle , complete with all 256 levels and Ms. PAC-MAN. We acquire AdMob , a mobile display advertising company. July As part of our long-term goal to power our operations with 100% renewable energy, we announce an agreement to purchase the clean energy from 114 megawatts of wind generation in Iowa. “Life in a Day” is a cinematic experiment to document one day as seen through the eyes of people around the world—created with thousands of submissions from YouTube users. August Priority Inbox helps you handle information overload in Gmail by automatically sorting your email by importance, using a variety of signals. “The Wilderness Downtown” is a musical experience created by writer/director Chris Milk with the band Arcade Fire and Google, built with Google Chrome in mind using HTML5 and other technologies. September Google Instant shows you search results as you type so you can quickly get to the information you’re looking for. Three years after we first launched Street View in five U.S. cities, you can explore all seven continents at eye level with the addition of Brazil, Ireland and Antarctica imagery. October We announce we've developed technology for cars that can drive themselves; we think self-driving cars can help prevent traffic accidents, free up people’s time and reduce carbon emissions. Our automated cars have since logged more than 500,000 miles on the road. December YouTube introduces TrueView , a new kind of ad—after 5 seconds, if an ad doesn't seem relevant or interesting to you, you can skip it. TrueView is part of our effort to ensure viewers watch ads that are most relevant to them, and advertisers reach the right audience. 2011 February The Google Art Project lets you virtually tour some of of the world’s best museums and explore high resolution images of tens of thousands of works of art from 40 countries. We introduce an advanced opt-in security feature called 2-step verification to help people keep their Google Accounts secure. 2-step verification is now available in 40 languages and 150+ countries. March The new +1 button lets you publicly give something a “thumbs up,” helping your friends and contacts find the best stuff online. April Larry Page takes over as CEO —10 years after he last held the title. Eric Schmidt becomes executive chairman. Charlie Chaplin’s 122nd birthday is the occasion for our first-ever live-action doodle . May Google Wallet makes it convenient to shop in-store, online or on the go, and helps merchants simplify the checkout experience. Google Offers kicks off in beta in Portland, Ore. We announce the first Chromebooks from partners Samsung and Acer. Chromebooks are designed to be fast, simple, secure and easy to keep updated. June Our playable doodle in honor of guitar inventor Les Paul becomes the most popular Google doodle of all time. in just 48 hours in the U.S., you recorded 5.1 years worth of music—40 million songs—using our doodle guitar. And those songs were played back 870,000 times! We install a corporate electric vehicle charging infrastructure . Today it's the largest in the country, with charging at 750+ parking spaces. We add speech recognition into search on desktop for Chrome users. Simply click the microphone in the Google search box, and you can speak your search. The Google+ project —real-life sharing, rethought for the web—launches. All our products start getting a design makeover, beginning with our homepage. July Talented young scientists wow the judges at the inaugural Google Science Fair , an online science competition open to students aged 13-18 from around the world. AdWords Express is a faster and simpler way for small businesses to start advertising online in under five minutes. August We bring offline access to Gmail, Calendar and Docs for people using Chrome. September We acquire Zagat to help you find the very best places. October Android 4.0, a.k.a. Ice Cream Sandwich , is designed to work on both phones and tablets, and to make the power of Android enticing and intuitive. November We launch Google+ Pages to connect you with the businesses, organizations and other things you care about. We have a few of our own sharing updates about the company. Google Maps now helps you to figure out where you are and get directions when you're inside a building like an airport or mall. December Android Market exceeds 10 billion app downloads—with a growth rate of one billion app downloads per month. We open a new office in Paris , a symbol of our commitment to one of Europe’s fastest-growing Internet economies. The new office is also home to the Google Cultural Institute. 2012 January We join thousands of other sites to encourage users to stand up against two legislative proposals in the U.S. (SOPA and PIPA) which would have censored the Internet and impeded innovation. The next day, the bills are set aside. More than 7 million Internet users sign the petition hosted at google.com/takeaction . February Chrome launches on Android, so you can take the same simple, fast and secure web browsing experience with you wherever you go, across devices. Three months later we launch Chrome on iOS. March Android Market becomes Google Play , a digital content store offering apps, games, books, movies, music and more. April It's our busiest April Fools’ Day ever, launching Google Maps 8-bit for NES , our Canine Staffing Team , NASCAR’s race car of the future (hint: it drives itself) and more. May Hangouts On Air become available worldwide. Many public figures and organizations have hosted Hangouts to connect directly with the public, including U.S. President Barack Obama, NASA, David Beckham, Taylor Swift and U.N. Secretary-General Ban-Ki Moon. We introduce the Knowledge Graph in Search, which makes it easier for you to discover information about real-world things—landmarks, celebrities, cities, sports teams, movies, works of art and more. This launch is built on our acquisition in 2010 of Metaweb. We acquire Motorola Mobility . Our doodle in honor of Dr. Robert Moog , the inventor of the electronic analog Synthesizer, is an interactive, playable logo that allows you to record, play back and share songs. We expand our Transparency Report with a new section on copyright , providing information on the number of requests we get from copyright owners to remove Google Search results because they allegedly link to infringing content. We transition Google Product Search to Google Shopping to help people research products and connect directly with merchants to make purchases. June We unveil DoubleClick Digital Marketing , our new platform that enables seamless ad campaign management for agencies and advertisers. We announce Google Now , which brings you the information you need, before you even ask, like what today’s weather will be like, how much traffic to expect on your way to work or your favorite team's score while they’re playing. We release the first Nexus 7 —a powerful 7" tablet designed to bring Google Play content to life and bring you the best of Google in the palm of your hand. Later in the year, the Nexus family expands to include a 10" tablet and the Nexus 4 phone. Trekker is a way to capture Street View imagery of beautiful places that are only accessible by foot (like the Grand Canyon or the Galapagos). July The world sees the Olympics live on YouTube for the first time. Viewers watched a total of 230 million video streams, and our partnership with NBC makes it the most live-streamed Olympics to date. October We provide an unprecedented look inside our data centers . The Samsung Chromebook becomes available for just $249. Google Crisis Response launches Public Alerts —warnings for natural disasters and emergency situations—the same day we publish resources to respond to Superstorm Sandy. November We begin installing Google Fiber —ultra-high speed Internet access that is up to 100 times faster than today’s average broadband—for our first customers in Kansas City, Kansas and Kansas City Missouri. The next year, we announce Fiber in Austin, Texas and Provo, Utah. December Lady Ada Lovelace, mathematician and writer known to many people as the world’s first computer programmer, gets a doodle . 2013 January We commit to invest $200 million in a wind farm in west Texas. This brings our total clean energy commitments to more than $1 billion, which can generate over 2 GW—enough to power all the public elementary schools in New York, Wyoming and Oregon for a year. February We introduce enhanced campaigns , which updates AdWords for the multi-screen world. In 50 words, tomorrow’s Glass Explorers tell us what they would do if they had Glass. The first Explorers get Glass later in the year. Our newest laptop—the Chromebook Pixel —is designed from the ground up for power users who have embraced the cloud. April Get just the information you need right when you need it with the release of Google Now for iPhone and iPad . Plan your digital afterlife with Inactive Account Manager , which enables you to tell us what to do with your data from Google services if your account becomes inactive for any reason. May A video doodle for graphic designer and filmmaker Saul Bass celebrates his classic film credits and posters. We release imagery of the Earth taken from space over a quarter-century, providing a stunning historical perspective on the changes to the Earth’s surface over time. Google Play Music All Access , a new monthly music subscription service, lets you listen to millions of songs across your devices. We introduce a new Google+ Photos experience that helps your photos look their best, as well as Hangouts , which will be Google’s single communications system, replacing Google Talk, Google+ Hangouts and Messenger. Gmail gets a brand new inbox that helps you see what’s new at a glance and decide which emails you want to read when. June We unveil our latest Google[x] project: balloon-powered Internet access. We hope Project Loon can become an option for connecting rural, remote and underserved areas, and for crisis response communications. We acquire Waze to help you outsmart traffic. Funded by Google, Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory investigates the energy impact of cloud computing. Their research indicates that moving all office workers in the United States to the cloud could reduce the energy used by information technology by up to 87 percent. July Just months after we preview the new Maps for desktop at Google I/O, we release the updated Google Maps app for smartphones and tablets —part of our redesign of Maps across devices. Chromecast is a small and affordable device that makes it easy to use your phone, tablet or laptop to bring your favorite online entertainment to your TV screen. We team up with Starbucks to bring faster, free WiFi connections to all 7,000 company-operated Starbucks stores in the U.S. September Android passes 1 billion device activations —reflecting the work of the entire Android ecosystem and thanks to the enthusiasm of users all around the world. We announce Calico, a new company that will focus on health and well-being, with Arthur D. Levinson as CEO. October KitKat delivers a smarter, more immersive Android experience to even more people. We also introduce the new Nexus 5 . An update to Google+ Photos makes it easier to find, perfect and share your best life moments. November Street View comes to Venice , bringing you panoramic views of one of the world's most beautiful cities. December 2014 January We acquire Nest —a company that reinvents unloved products for the home, like thermostats and smoke alarms. We announce a new Google[x] project focused on using miniaturized electronics in a contact lens to measure glucose levels and help people with diabetes. February Working with organization Polar Bears International, we collect Street View imagery of the Canadian tundra , giving you an intimate look at polar bears in their natural habitat. Chromebox for meetings brings together Google+ Hangouts and Google Apps to make it simpler for any company to have high-definition video meetings. April Street View in Google Maps now lets you explore historical imagery dating back to 2007. May Our first 3D doodle celebrates the 40th anniversary of the Rubik's Cube . The next leg in the journey for our self-driving cars is prototypes that are designed to operate safely and autonomously without requiring human intervention. We publicly share data about the diversity of our workforce. June Made with Code is a new initiative aims to inspire girls to code. At our annual I/O conference, we announce new updates that bring Android to you wherever you are—in your car, on your TV and on your wrist. July During the World Cup, we share 100+ real-time search trends showing what people were curious about during the tournament, and create 60+ doodles live from Brazil. August Gmail and Calendar now recognize addresses that contain accented or non-Latin characters. September We introduce the first family of Android One phones in India. We reintroduce our Enterprise business as Google for Work . You can now make voice calls in Hangouts from your phones or desktop computer for free. October We launch Android Lollipop , designed for a multi-screen world. New Nexus 6, 9 and Player devices come along for the ride. Inbox —from the Gmail team—is a different take on email , designed to focus on what really matters.

Stanford University

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?

Larry Page : definition of Larry Page and synonyms of Larry Page (English) 7 External links   Early life and education Larry Page was born in Lansing , Michigan . [6] [7] His father, Carl Page, earned a Ph.D. in computer science in 1965 when the field was in its infancy, and is considered a "pioneer in computer science and artificial intelligence." Both he and Page's mother were computer science professors at Michigan State University . [8] [9] Gloria Page, his mother, is Jewish but he was raised without religion. [10] Page attended the Okemos Montessori School (now called Montessori Radmoor) in Okemos , Michigan from 1975 to 1979, and graduated from East Lansing High School in 1991. [11] He holds a Bachelor of Science in computer engineering from the University of Michigan with honors and a Master of Science in computer science from Stanford University . While at the University of Michigan, "Page created an inkjet printer made of Lego bricks" (actually a line plotter), [12] served as the president of the Eta Kappa Nu in Fall 1994, [13] and was a member of the 1993 "Maize & Blue" University of Michigan Solar Car team. During an interview, Page recalled his childhood, noting that his house "was usually a mess, with computers and Popular Science magazines all over the place". His attraction to computers started when he was six years old when he got to "play with the stuff lying around". He became the "first kid in his elementary school to turn in an assignment from a word processor." [14] His older brother also taught him to take things apart, and before long he was taking "everything in his house apart to see how it worked". He said that "from a very early age, I also realized I wanted to invent things. So I became really interested in technology...and business . . . probably from when I was 12, I knew I was going to start a company eventually". [14] After enrolling for a Ph.D. program in computer science at Stanford University, Larry Page was in search of a dissertation theme and considered exploring the mathematical properties of the World Wide Web , understanding its link structure as a huge graph . [15] [16] His supervisor Terry Winograd encouraged him to pursue this idea, which Page later recalled as "the best advice I ever got". [17] Page then focused on the problem of finding out which web pages link to a given page, considering the number and nature of such backlinks to be valuable information about that page (with the role of citations in academic publishing in mind). [16] In his research project, nicknamed "BackRub", he was soon joined by Sergey Brin , a fellow Stanford Ph.D. student. [16] John Battelle , co-founder of Wired magazine, wrote of Page that he had reasoned that the "entire Web was loosely based on the premise of citation – after all, what is a link but a citation? If he could devise a method to count and qualify each backlink on the Web, as Page puts it 'the Web would become a more valuable place'." [16] Battelle further described how Page and Brin began working together on the project: "At the time Page conceived of BackRub, the Web comprised an estimated 10 million documents, with an untold number of links between them. The computing resources required to crawl such a beast were well beyond the usual bounds of a student project. Unaware of exactly what he was getting into, Page began building out his crawler. "The idea's complexity and scale lured Brin to the job. A polymath who had jumped from project to project without settling on a thesis topic, he found the premise behind BackRub fascinating. "I talked to lots of research groups" around the school, Brin recalls, "and this was the most exciting project, both because it tackled the Web, which represents human knowledge, and because I liked Larry". [16] Brin and Page originally met in March 1995, during a spring orientation of new computer Ph.D. candidates. Page, who had already been in the program for two years, was assigned to show some students, including Brin, around campus, and they later became good friends. [18] To convert the backlink data gathered by BackRub's web crawler into a measure of importance for a given web page, Brin and Page developed the PageRank algorithm, and realized that it could be used to build a search engine far superior to existing ones. [16] It relied on a new kind of technology that analyzed the relevance of the back links that connected one Web page to another. [18] In August 1996, the initial version of Google was made available, still on the Stanford University Web site. [16]   Business Main articles: Google and History of Google In 1998, Brin and Page founded Google, Inc. [19] Page ran Google as co-president along with Brin until 2001 when they hired Eric Schmidt as Chairman and CEO of Google. In January 2011 Google announced that Page would replace Schmidt as CEO in April the same year. [20] Both Page and Brin earn an annual compensation of one dollar . On April 4, 2011, Page officially became the chief executive of Google, while Schmidt stepped down to become executive chairman.   Personal life Page married Lucinda Southworth at Richard Branson 's Caribbean island, Necker Island in 2007. [21] Southworth is a research scientist and sister of actress and model Carrie Southworth . [22] [23] [24] They have one child.   Other interests Page is an active investor in alternative energy companies, such as Tesla Motors , which developed the Tesla Roadster , a 244-mile (393 km) range battery electric vehicle . [25] He continues to be committed to renewable energy technology, and with the help of Google.org , Google's philanthropic arm, promotes the adoption of plug-in hybrid electric cars and other alternative energy investments. [14] Brin and Page are the executive producers of the 2007 film Broken Arrows . [26]   Awards and recognition PC Magazine has praised Google as among the Top 100 Web Sites and Search Engines (1998) and awarded Google the Technical Excellence Award, for Innovation in Web Application Development in 1999. In 2000, Google earned a Webby Award , a People's Voice Award for technical achievement, and in 2001, was awarded Outstanding Search Service, Best Image Search Engine, Best Design, Most Webmaster Friendly Search Engine, and Best Search Feature at the Search Engine Watch Awards." [27] In 2002, Page, along with Sergey Brin, was named to the MIT Technology Review TR100 , as one of the top 100 innovators in the world under the age of 35. [28] In 2003, both Brin and Page received an honorary MBA from IE Business School "for embodying the entrepreneurial spirit and lending momentum to the creation of new businesses...." [29] And in 2004, they received the Marconi Foundation Prize, the "Highest Award in Engineering," and were elected Fellows of the Marconi Foundation at Columbia University . "In announcing their selection, John Jay Iselin, the Foundation's president, congratulated the two men for their invention that has fundamentally changed the way information is retrieved today." They joined a "select cadre of 32 of the world's most influential communications technology pioneers...." [30] He was elected to the National Academy of Engineering in 2004. In 2005, Brin and Page were elected Fellows of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences . [31] In 2002 the World Economic Forum named Page a Global Leader for Tomorrow and in 2004 the X PRIZE chose Page as a trustee for their board. [12] In 2004, Page and Brin were named "Persons of the Week" by ABC World News Tonight . Page received an honorary doctorate from the University of Michigan in 2009 during graduation commencement ceremonies. [32] In 2011, he was ranked 24th on the Forbes list of billionaires and as the 11th richest person in the United States. [1]   References

i don't know

According to the fairy tale Cinderella, what vegetable gets turned into the carriage?

Kenneth Branagh's Cinderella Brings The Fairy Tale To Life At CinemaCon - CINEMABLEND Kenneth Branagh's Cinderella Brings The Fairy Tale To Life At CinemaCon By Eric Eisenberg 2 years ago While Kenneth Branagh became best known as a director for his big screen adaptations of William Shakespeare’s greatest works, in the last few years he has done his part to completely shake up his own reputation. He got a taste of fantasy adventure with Thor in 2011, and tried his hand at political intrigue with Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit earlier this year. For his next feature, he's tackling fairy tales with Cinderella . We still have nearly a full year before we get to see how his adaptation of the classic tale will turn out, but earlier today we got a very special sneak peek of the movie with a special screening of footage shown during the Walt Disney Studios presentation at CinemaCon . Kicking off with the classic "Once Upon A Time" voice over narration, the footage began with shots of a young girl named Ella living what seems to be a very fairy tale-esque life. She has a father (Ben Chaplin) who clearly loves her and we see shots of the two of them playing in a field as happy as can be. This all changes, however, with the arrival of Lady Tremaine (Cate Blanchett) - Ella's new evil stepmother - and her daughters Anastasia (Holliday Grainger) and Drizella (Sophie McShera). Ella’s father goes on a trip, leaving his daughter with her new guardians, but things go from bad to worse when he winds up getting ill while on the road and dies. Ella (played as an adult by Lily James) goes from being a beloved daughter to being basically a slave in her own house, forced to do all of the chores and labor around the house (the amount of soot on her face is what earns her the nickname "Cinderella"). Things start to look up when Ella goes riding on her horse into the woods and runs into Prince Charming (sharing a bit of tête-à-tête about the dangers of riding in the forest alone), and then learns of a royal ball being held at the palace. Ella takes one of her mother’s dresses and is excited to attend the gala event, but is shut down when Lady Tremaine, Anastasia and Drizella rip her dress and tell her that she can’t go. Devastated by her stepmother and stepsisters’ cruelty, she runs out to the garden crying, but it is here where she meets an old woman (Helena Bonham Carter) who reveals herself as Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother. In a sudden flash the old woman goes from appearing decrepit to beautiful, wearing an elegant puffy blue dress and blonde locks that hang to her shoulders. From there it is time to get to work. The Fairy Godmother starts making requests for various fruits and vegetables, from watermelon to cantaloupe to artichoke (most of which Cinderella doesn’t even recognize the name of), but then the titular heroine reveals that she does have some pumpkins. Using her magic, the Fairy Godmother enchants one of the orange squashes and makes it grow to tremendous size before transforming it into a beautifully ornate gold carriage that Cinderella can take to the ball. Cinderella arrives at the royal event as fireworks fill the sky and the screen is filled with some stunning production design, as the palace that was built for the movie is really something to behold and all of the characters are clad in elegant suits and dresses. Cinderella immediately catches the eye of the prince (who doesn’t seem to recognize her) and nervously asks her for the party’s first dance. After a quick montage featuring more footage from Ella’s childhood and even a bit of sword fighting, the footage flashed back to Ella and the Prince dancing together. The young woman says. "Are they looking at you?" and the prince replies, "Believe me, they’re all looking at you." While we were told before the footage that some of the special effects had yet to be completed and that the movie is still very much a work in process, I was definitely impressed by what I saw. There is an interesting mix of tones at work, as heavy drama is lightened by some funny dialogue and rapport, and the film looks gorgeously shot. Of course, this is the footage that Disney wanted us to see in order to get us excited for the film, but my interest is definitely piqued. It may be a while before anything from Cinderella is released into the public sphere, but stay tuned for a trailer in the second half of the year and get ready for the film's theatrical release on March 13, 2015. Subscribe To Topics You're Interested In close

Pumpkin

In September 1893, which country became the first in the world to give women the right to vote?

Cinderella – Nosy Crow animated picture book for iPad - Digital Storytime's Review The Digital Media Diet A Cinderella tale for the modern era ... The much awaited second book from Nosy Crow is here and fans of their first book app, The Three Little Pigs, will not be disappointed. Cinderella captivates readers of all ages and brings even more interactivity to the classic tale of a girl, her fairy godmother & a mysterious glass slipper. You can help Cinderella tidy the house, dress the mean step-sisters for the ball, and even pick the pumpkin to be turned into a carriage. Like their previous app, Nosy Crow has not forgotten a single detail in this delightful title, featuring adorable child actors for the voices of all the characters. You can scroll to see more of each page, with fun activities that include hunting for a cute little bird that hides in every scene. The pages are so touchable, in fact, that a child can play with this book for nearly an hour and still not find every interactive element. The characters have lots of speech bubbles with additional dialogue that deepens the otherwise brief version of this classic story. My child has been completely enthralled with this book from the moment I downloaded it. He said his very favorite part was getting to help Cinderella & the fairy godmother gather all the items needed for her trip to the ball. The requests for help are made directly from the characters in speech bubbles, creating a seemless experience for the reader. I especially enjoyed getting to choose the color of Cinderella's dress, since changing the color affects all the scenes that follow. It is as if you are part of the story, shaping the experience as the characters not only leap off the page but also talk directly to the reader. This book app is also very solidly made, with nice settings including a page guide. The story has simple arrow page turning and a clear, easy to read font (although it does not highlight as read). The images tilt and move with the device, making the story come alive - it's as if the reader is peering through an iPad shaped window into a world of imagination. Great sound effects, gorgeous background music and truly whimsical illustrations round out this title for something close to digital perfection. The story itself is a brief retelling of the classic Cinderella story that is especially modern and kid-friendly, including a very hip fairy godmother, ice cream cones at the ball and lots of funny dialogue. The story ends with the couple playing table tennis (tap on either bride or groom to get them to serve the ball). Overall this is one of the most fun book apps to come across my iPad. My highest recommendation! All reviews are of the app, not the platform/device. Based originally on iPad versions. Minor technical details may vary.     Story Synopsis - Cinderella – Nosy Crow animated picture book Cinderella is a young girl who lives with her mean step-mother & two step-sisters. She works like a servant girl in the household and is dressed in rags. One day the King decides to invite everyone in the kingdom to a ball in the hopes of introducing the prince to a girl he can fall in love with and marry. The two step-sisters are very excited about the ball but Cinderella is forbidden to go. Instead she must help the step-sisters get ready. After the girls leave for the ball, Cinderella sits crying until out of nowhere a fairy godmother appears and tells her she will be going to the ball. They gather items & turn a pumpkin into a carriage and mice into horses to carry Cinderella to the ball in the beautiful gown the fairy has magically created. She also gets a pair of glass slippers. But all the magic will wear off at midnight, so Cinderella must get home by then ... When she arrives at the ball, Cinderella gets lots of attention (and her family does not recognize her). The prince is enthralled with the young girl although she must dash off at midnight. She loses one of her glass slippers in her haste. She barely arrives home in time as all the magic disappears. The prince is obsessed with finding the girl with the glass slippers and looks far and wide. One day he arrives at Cinderella's home and asks ALL the women of the house to try the glass slipper on, hoping to find the girl who fits it perfectly. The shoe fits and the prince marries Cinderella at once. They all live happily ever after.  

i don't know

The 21st amendment to the US constitution, a happy occasion if ever there was one, officially repeals what previous constitutional amendment?

Fourteenth Amendment - First thoughts about Fourteenth Amendment The Fourteenth Amendment (Amendment XIV) to the United States Constitution was adopted on July 9, 1868, as one of the Reconstruction Amendments. Write here your first thoughts about Fourteenth Amendment ... 10 Dec 2016     03:46 17/99 (Note: changed by section 2 of the Fourteenth Amendment.) The actual Enumeration shall be made 10 Dec 2016     00:33 The Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment of the U.S. Constitution prohibits states from… 09 Dec 2016     21:20 MILegalize files petition against the state of citing First, Fifth, and Fourteenth amendment violations 09 Dec 2016     12:34 What the Fourteenth Amendment Means for the President and the Debt Ceiling 09 Dec 2016     03:21 I don't understand. The Equal Protection Clause is part of The Fourteenth Amendment. 08 Dec 2016     05:27 The woman is protected by the fourteenth amendment, the fetus has no constitutional rights 07 Dec 2016     08:17 Good thing you're not a judge. The Equal Protection Clause is part of the Fourteenth Amendment. 07 Dec 2016     04:48 The (so-called) Fourteenth Amendment is Unconstitutional - It is a Revision 07 Dec 2016     03:43 the penalty is in the fourteenth amendment...disqualification from holding office under the United States. 07 Dec 2016     02:50 I don't think we spend enough time talking about how cool the Fourteenth Amendment is 06 Dec 2016     19:30 Check out my latest video about how the so-called Fourteenth Amendment is unconstitutional 06 Dec 2016     18:29 The Fourteenth Amendment silently overturned Article 2 of the constitution? Good luck with that. 06 Dec 2016     04:59 In today's paper: Slaughter-House Cases interpret the fourteenth amendment! 01 Nov 2016     04:46 The "2 party trap" is enshrined in the fourteenth amendment. Change that first. 31 Oct 2016     19:04 Act of 1871 is not the issue. All gov's R corps. The 14th Amendment changed U in the eyes of the law. 31 Oct 2016     16:01 Fourteenth Amendment. The Union victory in the U.S. Civil War , preceded by President Abraham Lincoln’s 1863... 31 Oct 2016     07:27 Fourteenth Amendment of the Civil Aviation Regulations to become effective on 27 November 2016. 29 Oct 2016     21:35 July 9, 1868. This is the date when the Fourteenth Amendment was ratified. 29 Oct 2016     13:16 "It never ceases to amaze me how often Republicans prove just how little they actually understand about our... 28 Oct 2016     14:46 The first duty of government: Protection, Liberty, and the Fourteenth Amendment. 27 Oct 2016     18:43 Considering the fourteenth amendment wasn't passed until following the Civil War . 27 Oct 2016     13:18 Fourteenth Amendment to US Constitution explained: equal protection, citizenship, privileges or immunities and more 26 Oct 2016     21:01 For Mr "Not The James Gang" that is the perfect time because the Fourteenth Amendment has not happened yet. 26 Oct 2016     20:55 MT The first duty of government: Protection, Liberty and Fourteenth Amendment. 21 Aug 2016     03:21 Holding defendants in jail b/c they can't afford bail is unconstitutional & a violation of the Fourteenth Amendment 12 Jul 2016     02:28 A Treatise on the Rights and Privileges Guaranteed by the Fourteenth Amendment t 11 Jul 2016     22:39 This lesson explores the significance of this Fourteenth Amendment and its effects on our constitutional structure 11 Jul 2016     04:29 from national review. Very reasonable argument 10 Jul 2016     18:15 Shoot, who needed the 14th Amendment. There's always been the Guarantee Clause to subjugate the states. 10 Jul 2016     05:28 The technical legal term is walking while black and therefor not enjoying the fruits of the fourteenth amendment 10 Jul 2016     00:44 The Fourteenth Amendment to the US Constitution was adopted 148 years ago today. 09 Jul 2016     20:05 Happy 14th Amendment Day!. You need to read this.. After all, you consented to it!! 09 Jul 2016     19:33 in 1868, the 14th Amendment was ratified: 09 Jul 2016     19:22 ALWAYS. That's literally the point of Fifth and Fourteenth Amendment. Do those parts of the Constitution not matter? 09 Jul 2016     18:50 in 1868, the Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution was officially adopted. 09 Jul 2016     18:42 Happy Fourteenth Amendment Day! More radical and important than 1776 09 Jul 2016     15:06 Today is the 148th anniversary of the Fourteenth Amendment. 09 Jul 2016     00:51 There's a reason the fourteenth amendment has the phrase "due process" in it. We can't murder people for wrong doing even if it's justified 08 Jul 2016     23:06 the Framers of the Fourteenth Amendment rejected proposals to prohibit any and all use of racial classifications by the government 08 Jul 2016     22:05 Section one, the fourteenth Amendment says:. No state shall deprive… 08 Jul 2016     16:30 Our founding fathers said "all men are created equal." The Fourteenth Amendment said black men and women are included in "all men" 08 Jul 2016     15:50 *** ain't even citizens anyway check the dred scott ruling or the fourteenth amendment. You are not American 08 Jul 2016     05:47 Words can't describe how devastating it is that we are dealing with issues that should've resolved themselves after the Fourteenth Amendment 08 Jul 2016     02:41 The Fourteenth Amendment secures the right to due process 07 Jul 2016     14:06 The Fourteenth Amendment of the U.S. Constitution gives a man a right to be tried by his peer group. 07 Jul 2016     11:57 Hey, howsabout that fifth and fourteenth amendment, huh? Personally I like them better than the second. 07 Jul 2016     11:56 Clearly second, fifth and fourteenth Amendment rights don't apply to all. 07 Jul 2016     11:28 The purpose that brought the fourteenth amendment into being was equal... 07 Jul 2016     08:30 As a matter of history, the Fourteenth Amendment was not understood to... 07 Jul 2016     03:55 And the loose, almost insultingly lenient, vernacular of the fourteenth amendment haunts us as a people. We need a new system. 06 Jul 2016     16:51 I wish some people were as passionate about the Fourteenth Amendment as they are the Second. 19 Mar 2016     07:27 Hulk Hogan Gets $115 M Verdict Against Gawker at Sex Tape Trial - the First Amendment vs the Fourteenth Amendment 18 Mar 2016     22:27 It is to be hoped that to minimize uncertainty, future courts will eschew applying a Fourteenth Amendment “balancing” approach. 18 Mar 2016     14:30 March 31: “Equal Protection” — Panel on 150th anniversary of 14th Amendment 18 Mar 2016     11:05 Pet cats and dogs are protected property under the Fourteenth Amendment 18 Mar 2016     02:56 I currently found out that the fourteenth and Fifteenth Amendment gives women the right to vote. 17 Mar 2016     23:24 In 1869 this Clause formed the basis for the Fourteenth Amendment to the American Constitution 17 Mar 2016     20:11 The Supreme Court , in Palmore, supra, held that the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment prohibits consideration of private 17 Mar 2016     16:14 Intrigued to see how our friends 'across the pond' deal with the luxury given the Fourteenth Amendment. 17 Mar 2016     14:34 Today, the long and complex Fourteenth Amendment. I will not quote the text, but will rather provide meaning and comment by section. 17 Mar 2016     14:15 Jus Soli (Birthright citizenship by soil) who has the better interpretation on the fourteenth amendment? 16 Feb 2016     22:17 the only way Ailes is going to sit next to you Napolitano is if you interpret the Fourteenth Amendment to include anchor babies 16 Feb 2016     21:27 "An engrossing and well-made focus on the citizenship clause of the Fourteenth Amendment” - read review: 16 Feb 2016     21:05 Does state sovereign immunity bar remedies the Constitution itself demands? This Note argues no: 16 Feb 2016     19:15 You mean, jurists who believe the Fourteenth Amendment actually applies to everyone? 16 Feb 2016     18:07 You imagine Congress can "correct" the Fourteenth Amendment without an amendment. It isn't true. 16 Feb 2016     15:50 these views represent Justice Scalia 's sentiments the Fourteenth Amendment does not apply to women 15 Feb 2016     23:45 reproductive rights are central under the Fourteenth Amendment. Period. 15 Feb 2016     23:37 Andrew Johnson: Alaska is purchased from Russia for 7.2 Million. The fourteenth amendment is also ratified. He was the first To be impeached 15 Feb 2016     08:20 One more time, the Fourteenth Amendment does NOT grant birthright citizenship to children of illegal aliens 15 Feb 2016     04:35 The 14th Amendment to the US Constitution was passed by Congress on June 13, 1866 during Reconstruction. Along... 15 Feb 2016     02:42 You don't have to know who I am. All you have to do is read the very first sentence of the Fourteenth Amendment. Google it. 15 Feb 2016     02:35 It's in the Fourteenth Amendment and it has been for about 150 years. We're a nation of laws, not of Trump. 14 Feb 2016     13:52 Re anchor babies. As said in my novel The Anti-Trump: “The fourteenth amendment is no trifle – unless we elect a tyrant.” 09 Jan 2016     17:30 Today in 1867: The General Assembly votes against ratifying the Fourteenth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. 08 Jan 2016     17:40 "When Moreno does get around to examining Fourteenth Amendment history, he falters badly." 08 Jan 2016     02:17 Would you say the same about the First Amendment or Fourteenth Amendment? 08 Jan 2016     00:02 anything on how SCOTUS rewrote fourteenth amendment? 07 Jan 2016     23:04 The Fourteenth Amendment and a “natural born citizen” just read it and make up your own mind. Very interesting. 07 Jan 2016     19:13 The fourteenth amendment and jus sanguinis would disagree with you. 07 Jan 2016     17:42 I will defend my fourteenth marriage amendment right 07 Jan 2016     15:39 militia stealing our property, is not a militia do they even fly the state flag? . Fourteenth Amendment, it has been applied to the states 07 Jan 2016     10:03 But at least I get to dive in to my favorite subject, and favorite part of the class, the Fourteenth Amendment! 07 Jan 2016     00:53 Wrong. Section 1 of the Fourteenth Amendment applies to ALL people. Equality should not be a matter of geography. 06 Jan 2016     20:21 It IS. Fourteenth amendment. And I said it was Constitutional and the law agrees 06 Jan 2016     15:15 "Justice Kennedy has the opportunity to further cement his...Fourteenth Amendment vision into the law" 06 Jan 2016     05:56 Just spent the last 30 minutes trying to understand the Fourteenth Amendment. 05 Jan 2016     16:39 Barack Obama's executive order goes directly against the second and fourteenth amendment. Gross negligence of the Constitution. 03 Jan 2016     16:00 the First Amendment and the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment. 23 Oct 2015     16:29 Laura Edwards on consciousness of law before and after the Fourteenth Amendment 12 Sep 2015     17:21 How SCOTUS perverted the "equal protection" clause of Sec. 1 of the Fourteenth Amendment.: via 11 Sep 2015     02:11 I hate to break it to the *** ex-Arkansas-governor, but the Fourteenth Amendment overturned Dred Scott in 1848;... 23 Jul 2015     12:52 I'm watching a congressional hearing where a Republican witness is complaining that the Fourteenth Amendment goes too far. 26 Jun 2015     14:34 Fourteenth Amendment to the Constitution of the United States > Michigan's bigoted 2004 anti *** marriage law. 09 Jun 2015     23:39 Concept--"Government failure, or successful corporation"? 09 Jun 2015     21:28 getting paid to spend my days waist deep in Fourteenth Amendment decisions and jurisprudence feels too good to be true 09 Jun 2015     05:47 never Constitutionally ratified, therefore is Unconstitutional 08 Jun 2015     19:30 Today in 1866: The U.S. Senate approves the Fourteenth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. 08 Jun 2015     16:00 The abolishment of the fourteenth amendment and the restoration of the institution of slavery is the right way to hold this thief to account 08 Jun 2015     11:00 Within the month, the nation will receive the opinion of the U.S. Supreme Court as to whether the U.S. 07 Jun 2015     15:01 It had a constitutional basis.The Fourteenth Amendment mainly. 07 Jun 2015     05:20 Privileges OR Immunities Clause of the 14th Amendment was gutted by and limited our rights 12 Apr 2015     00:23 SCOTUS said Roe v Wade 1973, "a fetus is not a person within the meaning of the Fourteenth Amendment" 11 Apr 2015     04:31 Calabresi and Progressi on the Fourteenth Amendment and the Right to Economic Equality 10 Apr 2015     08:16 "The Fourteenth Amendment framers went to considerable lengths to preserve the traditional family unit, even... 09 Apr 2015     21:37 Due Process is stated twice in the Constitution both in the Fifth and Fourteenth Amendment in case anyone in Cal Poly Pomona didn't notice. 09 Apr 2015     18:59 I love how the fourteenth amendment clearly states that there won't be any discrimination based on sexual orientation or race yet it happens 09 Apr 2015     07:12 I put the fourth amendment instead of the fourteenth and like 20 people copied mine so we were all wrong 😅 08 Apr 2015     21:54 could maybe use Fourteenth Amendment section 5 enforcement clause, but SCOTUS doesn't like that much. 08 Apr 2015     20:43 Looking to teach the complex issues surrounding the Fourteenth Amendment? Check out our new series: 08 Apr 2015     19:06 ‘‘The Fourteenth Amendment does not enact Herbert Spencer’s Social Statics." BOOM 08 Apr 2015     16:38 Fourteenth Amend is based on fraud & is null and void 08 Apr 2015     15:10 School did not violate students’ rightsby subjecting them to breathalyzer tests before prom 08 Apr 2015     04:02 Fun fact: the AP Gov Exam Prep vocab list repeats the 14th amendment twice. Once spelled "fourteenth" and again as "14th." Way to be guys.. 08 Apr 2015     01:44 Thank Republicans "Thirteenth Amendment, which liberated four million slaves, and the Fourteenth and Fifteent... 08 Apr 2015     00:30 Selective Incorporation, the Bill of Rights, and the 14th Amendment - - 07 Apr 2015     03:00 FOURTEENTH AMENDMENT, ARTICLE 3. He IS aiding a country chanting death to us. No doubt -an enemy. 06 Apr 2015     18:42 For example, Fourteenth Amendment was a new update, a new regulation of the Emancipation Proclamation. 06 Apr 2015     17:02 Government by Judiciary : The Transformation of the Fourteenth Amendment by... 06 Apr 2015     15:40 The Fourteenth Amendment has been abused beyond recantation. 06 Apr 2015     14:49 the system installed under the Fourteenth Amendment political system. 06 Apr 2015     13:54 16 Congress has been advised that the Fourteenth Amendment was not lawfully ratified, see Congressional Record-House, June13,1967, pp 05 Apr 2015     20:17 (2/2) You do not have to support hate speech-- Your right not to bake the cake would be protected under Fourteenth Amendment. 04 Apr 2015     21:48 14th Amendment to the US Constitution, ensuring citizenship for slaves freed after Civil War & more 04 Apr 2015     15:34 The Fourteenth Amendment to the US Constitution: citizenship, due process, equal protection and more 12 Mar 2015     11:00 34th : Repeals the fourteenth amendment and lays out rules for the motor boating of husky children by Congress 11 Mar 2015     19:23 Mark Levin explains why the Fourteenth Amendment doesn’t apply to illegals 11 Mar 2015     07:35 ...claiming that the law is not just bad for their bottom line, but actually violates the Fourteenth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution." 11 Mar 2015     02:50 Hey, being forced to pay a living wage to workers isn't protected against by the fourteenth amendment. 11 Mar 2015     01:30 I would challenge executives to live on minimum wage for six months and share their experience via 11 Mar 2015     01:26 This is totally gonna make McDonald’s more popular in America! /s 11 Mar 2015     00:23 "In 1938, a frustrated Supreme Court justice complained that 'cases in which the Fourteenth Amendment was applied during the first 50 years, 10 Mar 2015     18:29 Aand is trying to use the 14th Amendment to circumvent minimum wage laws. Awesome. 10 Mar 2015     18:05 McD's tries to use freed slave rights amendment to stop min wage increase. Irony hash tag seen crying in the corner 10 Mar 2015     17:02 Things just keep getting worse for They just sued the city of over minimum wage. 10 Mar 2015     14:48 Take heart. McDonald's will fight for you 10 Mar 2015     13:55 “McDonald's sues Seattle over min wage increase Well, that takes BALLS 10 Mar 2015     13:44 McDonald's Sues City of Seattle to Stop Minimum Wage Increase: McDonald's and other chains argue that the mand... 10 Mar 2015     13:44 McDonald's sued the city of Seattle to halt mandatory minimum wage increase 11 Feb 2015     17:15 Birth Tourism on the Rise as Chinese Mothers Flock to United States to Give Birth – The Fourteenth Amendment of... 11 Feb 2015     17:01 Many participants in the Democracy School already know the Fourteenth Amendment: the rights of recently freed slaves. 10 Feb 2015     20:54 You mean invalidated unconstitutional bans on marriage equality. Violations of Fourteenth Amendment. 10 Feb 2015     19:49 …Fourteenth Amendment. This isn't a maneuvering by activists, but an established right that is being denied by probate judges 10 Feb 2015     02:03 yes Prop 8 which was declared unconstitutional because of the Fourteenth Amendment, which I quoted 09 Feb 2015     19:58 The citizenship provisions of the Fourteenth Amendment may be seen as a repudiation of one of the more... 09 Feb 2015     18:06 Segregation of students in public schools violates the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment,... 09 Feb 2015     14:22 Continuing to work through issues in taking clause jurisprudence: The Fourteenth Amendment via 09 Feb 2015     14:09 I'll be at Stanford talking about my new book in a couple of weeks. Drop by! 07 Feb 2015     19:06 What can states do to protect their inhabitants from this flagrant violation of the Fourteenth Amendment? 05 Feb 2015     00:36 Guys says the fourteenth amendment didn't give the same rights as men..bless her heart. 04 Feb 2015     16:34 "The last two clauses of the first section of the (proposed Fourteenth) amendment disable a State from depriving... 04 Feb 2015     15:26 Section 2 of the Fourteenth Amendment: any state that denies or abridges the right to vote for any reason ... 04 Feb 2015     03:32 Civil Rights: In-jail waiting times for competency evaluations violated detainees' Fourteenth Amendment subst... 04 Feb 2015     01:51 Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia 24 Jan 2015     16:38 The following is a collection of the key Concepts in Daniel Suelo’s Philosophy Taken from “The Man Who Quit Money” By Mark Sundeen The System is designed to force your existence in it Our whole society is designed so that you have to have money. You have to be a part of the capitalist system. It's illegal to live outside of it. our national identity is enmeshed with the idea of private property - our right to it is enshrined in the Fourteenth Amendment, which guarantees that we not be deprived of it, any more than of our lives or liberty, "without due process of law." The flip side of this protection of property holders, however, is a lack of protection for the property-less. And nowhere is this more apparent than with respect to real estate. The American Indian belief that man can no more own land than he can own air or sunlight was quashed with the arrival of Europeans. The ground beneath their feet was available for the taking, and over a period of three centuries, white people took it, until the ... 17 Jan 2015     19:39 What Is the Fourteenth Amendment and What Does It Mean? - marriage rights defined by Washington ? Not hardly 17 Jan 2015     19:18 *** Marriage will likely be decided by the US Supreme Court this year. We've known the outcome for many years now. In 2010, I published the following article in my column for the Humanist magazine: “What Next for *** Marriage?” By Kenneth W. Krause. Voters here in Wisconsin passed a ban on same-sex marriage in the fall of 2006. The following morning, I thoughtlessly tried to console a *** coworker by predicting a universal right to marry within a decade. “That’s fine,” she replied blankly, “but that doesn’t help us now.” For me, the *** marriage issue was and will always be no more than a legal and moral abstraction. For my coworker and her long-time partner, on the other hand, the marriage ban was a personal tragedy and a cold, hard slap in the face from their most trusted friends and neighbors. In November 2008, the citizens of California passed Proposition 8, amending that state’s constitution to ban recognition of same-sex marriages performed thereafter. The initiative pas ... 17 Jan 2015     15:22 SSM. At issue: Does the Fourteenth Amendment require that a state treat all people with respect and dignity? Why, yes, it does! 17 Jan 2015     03:38 Please see the Fourteenth Amendment to the Constitution. Please consider abandoning citizen and substituting resident. 16 Jan 2015     22:13 "The Fourteenth Amendment guarantees 'equal protection of the laws' to 'any person.'" 16 Jan 2015     21:22 For everyone who doesn't know, I just found out. the Fourteenth Amendment, Section 1 is the battleground here. 16 Jan 2015     21:04 How would a decision read, if Court found a Fourteenth Amendment right to recognition of out-of-state marriages, but no right to marry? 16 Jan 2015     20:58 Interesting, though, that QP2 is explicitly about the Fourteenth Amendment, and not Full Faith and Credit. 16 Jan 2015     20:47 to decide Picked a good time to publish my book on the original meaning of the 14th Amendment. 16 Jan 2015     20:47 The U.S. Supreme Court will decide whether the Fourteenth Amendment requires states to license same-sex marriages. 16 Jan 2015     20:36 Question 1 for SCOTUS: Does the Fourteenth Amendment require a state to license a marriage between two people of the same sex? 16 Jan 2015     17:43 in 1867, West Virginia ratified the Fourteenth Amendment guaranteeing full civil rights to African Americans . 16 Jan 2015     15:50 .accuses city officials of violating the Fourteenth Amendment in its deal 16 Jan 2015     07:47 Democracy Reborn: The Fourteenth Amendment and the Fight for Equal Rights in Po 15 Jan 2015     18:43 The Thirteenth Amendment ended slavery, the fourteenth gave blacks citizenship & the Fifteenth Amendment gave the right too vote. 14 Jan 2015     22:26 Therefore, The Fourteenth Amendment is a valid protection. 14 Jan 2015     17:24 I would hope we would =all= be activists on Lochner (or else seek repeal of the Fourteenth Amendment). 12 Jan 2015     23:59 The banned choke hold is handy for instant repeal of the entire bill. of rights plus the Fourteenth Amendment. 12 Jan 2015     19:49 Favorite Bonnie Kaplan quote from Fri 5th Cir arg: "Let me put it this way-- the Fourteenth Amendment came after the Tenth." 11 Jan 2015     14:32 .in a long line of judicial decisions on the Fourteenth Amendment to the Constitution. 11 Jan 2015     08:57 The Fourteenth Amendment guarantees citizenship and rights to all people born or naturalized in the United States. 10 Jan 2015     22:45 Oh yeah, by the way... *** marriage is now legal in Florida. The Fourteenth Amendment guarentees… 25 Nov 2014     05:38 Fourteenth Amendment: Equal Protection (1868) know your history ppl. Mike brown deserved his rights… 18 Nov 2014     23:22 The Fourteenth Amendment (Amendment XIV) to the United States Constitution was adopted on July 9, 1868, as one of the Reconstruction Amendments. The amendment addresses citizenship rights and equal protection of the laws, and was proposed in response to issues related to former slaves following the… 18 Nov 2014     20:40 If you don't like the Fourteenth Amendment, march forward and try to repeal it. Good luck with that, bro. 18 Nov 2014     06:06 Using the fourteenth amendment for a paper. My favorite one for sure. 16 Nov 2014     20:14 imagine the American legal system two hundred years ago. There was no Fourteenth Amendment to the Constitution, no guarantee of equal rights 16 Nov 2014     16:35 The fourteenth amendment in no way relates to abortion; how is it still legal? 15 Nov 2014     23:36 Fourteenth Amendment Gives Congress the Power to Enforce the Second Amendment , not Infringe it 15 Nov 2014     22:22 smh i wish I read up on my fourteenth amendment 15 Nov 2014     17:01 tragic! A classic State Created Danger Fourteenth Amendment civil rights violation. I would take this case. 15 Nov 2014     06:44 Police were exempted from these laws= violation of the Fourteenth Amendment and Equal Protection Clause 14 Nov 2014     22:45 Yikes, the governor in Alabama doesn't have a basic grasp of the Fourteenth Amendment as it has been interpreted... 13 Nov 2014     20:43 I've written " Equal Protection Clause ," "due process clause," and "Fourteenth Amendment" enough times this week for the rest of my life. 13 Nov 2014     17:45 Still questioning whether or not the Fourteenth Amendment means anything to anyone anymore. 13 Nov 2014     16:30 Photoset: Johnson administration framed as fulfilment of Fourteenth Amendment. (Afro-American, 14 November... 12 Nov 2014     19:28 Has she ever even heard of the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment? 12 Nov 2014     14:51 ...of the Fourteenth Amendment of the United States Constitution and are invalid as a matter of law." 12 Nov 2014     13:59 "But now with Democrats in control of exactly zero red states..." - 11 Nov 2014     21:39 Nobody at Has Read The 14th Amendment. Effort to create evil Republican boogey man makes vox dumb 11 Nov 2014     21:37 Nobody at Has Read The Fourteenth Amendment: . has published an “anal... 11 Nov 2014     21:21 Dayum --> needs to correct nearly everything it posts via 11 Nov 2014     20:45 Vox is to legal writing what Popehat is to writing on new developments in particle physics. 11 Nov 2014     20:42 This is great. --> Nobody at Has Read The Fourteenth Amendment via 11 Nov 2014     20:40 But, really, who is surprised by this?==>Nobody at Has Read The Fourteenth Amendment 11 Nov 2014     20:29 on Harvard-educated *** Matt Yglesias' latest dumbassery, this time on the 14th Amendment. 21 Oct 2014     15:00 U.S. History from 1850–1899 CONTINUED 1861–1865 Civil War : Conflict between the North (the Union) and the South (the Confederacy) over the expansion of slavery into western states. Confederates attack Ft. Sumter in Charleston, S.C., marking the start of the war (April 12, 1861). Virginia, Arkansas, North Carolina, and Tennessee secede (April–June). Emancipation Proclamation is issued, freeing slaves in the Confederate states (Jan. 1, 1863). Battle of Gettysburg is fought (July 1–3). President Lincoln delivers the Gettysburg Address (Nov. 19). Gen. William T. Sherman captures Atlanta (Sept. 2, 1864). Lincoln's second inauguration (March 4, 1865). Gen. Ulysses S. Grant captures Richmond, Va., the capital of the Confederacy (April 3). Confederate general Robert E. Lee surrenders to Ulysses S. Grant at Appomattox Courthouse, Va., (April 9). 1863 Homestead Act becomes law, allowing settlers to claim land (160 acres) after they have lived on it for five years (Jan. 1). 1865 Lincoln is assassinated (Apri ... 21 Oct 2014     14:22 WHY I’M NOT A REPUBLICAN I may regret posting this, but with an election imminent it’s apropos. My chief difficulty with the GOP derives from its basic philosophy. Ronald Reagan summed it up nicely: “Government is the problem, not the solution.” A good friend of mine also states it well: “The Government should be as small as necessary to perform (its) delineated duties. We (Republicans) believe the Federal Government should have minimal powers, e.g. National Defense and Interstate Commerce; all other powers are ‘States Rights’ and if I do not like the way my State regulates, I am free to move to another State.” The Tenth Amendment makes the case best of all: “The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the states, are reserved to the states respectively, or to the people.” Sounds good, right? The trouble with most good-sounding ideas is that no rule can be “one size fits all, all the time.” Time, you see, changes things. And as c ... 19 Oct 2014     23:49 Why did the fourteenth Amendment grant newly freed slaves political rights? 19 Oct 2014     07:35 Sunday Book Roundup: The History Roll has a review of Kurt T. Lash's The Fourteenth Amendment and the Privileg... 19 Oct 2014     01:40 Please see the Fourteenth Amendment and The Civil Rights Act of 1964. They both apply in this case. 18 Oct 2014     18:58 Roe v. Wade being questioned again. Fourteenth Amendment rights for women in trouble possibly? 18 Oct 2014     18:06 I'm using it as evidence of application of the Fourteenth Amendment in areas not specifically mentioned... 18 Oct 2014     18:01 It's not my fault that you refuse to acknowledge that the Fourteenth Amendment applies to all laws. 18 Oct 2014     11:04 The Pastors in Houston complaining about the First Amendment were working against the fourteenth amendment. Just sayin' 17 Oct 2014     17:54 Keeping people from their marriage rights is obviously a violation of the fourteenth amendment, yet it still doesn't stand out for LGBT 17 Oct 2014     11:21 Fourteenth Amendment was passed, and by the solemn sanction of the 17 Oct 2014     02:21 14th Amendment to the most influential after the Bill of Rights: 17 Oct 2014     02:05 prior to the Fourteenth Amendment a state, county, or city could restrict your firearms deportment, afterwards, not so much. 17 Oct 2014     01:55 I hope you find time to tell us how the Fourteenth Amendment fundamentally changed the Constitution like no other amendment. 16 Oct 2014     21:11 I'd definitely say the fourteenth amendment is one of the most important historical legacies of the Republican Party . 16 Oct 2014     05:14 African-Americans and the Fourteenth Amendment of the US Constitution 15 Oct 2014     21:58 Fourteenth amendment! More or less. The Justice Department is pretty key in making sure it's followed. 15 Oct 2014     18:37 The fourteenth amendment is broken everyday ☕️ 13 Oct 2014     22:48 you clean the Fourteenth Amendment as well but yet you want to steal the First Amendment rights of people! 13 Oct 2014     21:11 No, it's the application of the Fourteenth Amendment in regards to discriminatory state law. 13 Oct 2014     17:55 Also look up how the fourteenth amendment meant to give equal rights to blacks was hijacked by corporations. 13 Oct 2014     14:54 “At the heart of [Fourteenth Amendment] liberty is the right to define one’s own concept of existence, of... 11 Sep 2014     12:50 "guarantee... Fourteenth Amendment... right of privacy... child rearing, procreation, marriage... medical treatment" 06 Jun 2014     18:58 Seven couples are suing the state of North Dakota in federal court for the freedom to marry, arguing that their Fourteenth Amendment rights are being violated. 04 Jun 2014     12:58 I am finally to the "really mad" phase about the fact that I was entirely deprived of my First and Fourteenth Amendment rights, to run for office just like anyone else, in a layered process co-starring the Secretary of State's office, Mark Martin, who actively worked AGAINST me, personally, and against a free and fair election for judge in Pulaski County. I will be helping to raise support for Susan Inman for Secretary of State. We have to get rid of this clown! 04 Jun 2014     08:08 THIS IS THE GUY THAT FOUNDED "THE KU KLUX KLAN" AND MORE.READ. Albert Pike, 1809 – 1891, Sovereign Grand Phil Robertson "The Duck Commander" Sovereign Grand Inspector General, 33rd Degree Ancient and Accepted Scottish Rite Freemasonry, Southern Jurisdiction, USA, 1859 - 1891. A Luciferian and founder of the first White Ku Klux Klan in 1866 (later disbanded – due to its Jesuit-controlled violence – in 1869 by the brave ex-Confederate General and Freemason, Nathan Bedford Forrest, after the forced ratification of the Papal Caesar’s Fourteenth Amendment (1868)), Pike was a Masonic brother to his contemporary occultist Karl Marx. With his Southern lodge-rooms he drew the Protestants of the South into a war during which they were betrayed by their leaders beholden to the fear of death by Masonic masters subordinate to the Jesuit General in Rome. After the War, the Masonic victors erected two of their Masonic idols in celebration of the Black Pope’s newly created “Holy Roman” American Empire. They ... 18 May 2014     00:24 May 17, 2014: The Supreme Court ruled that school segregation violated the Fourteenth Amendment on this date in 1954. An eight-year-old girl named Linda Brown in Topeka, Kansas, had to travel 21 blocks every day to an all-black elementary school, even though she lived just seven blocks from another elementary school for white children. Her father, Oliver Brown, asked that his daughter be allowed to attend the nearby white school, and when the white school's principal refused, Brown sued. The court had five school segregation cases from different states on its docket, so the justices combined them under one name: Oliver Brown et al. v. the Board of Education of Topeka. The Supreme Court justices decided to list Brown's case first because it originated in Kansas, and they didn't want to give the impression that segregation was purely a Southern problem. The legal basis for segregation came from the 1896 Supreme Court case Plessy v. Ferguson, which had established that separate facilities for black and white ... 08 May 2014     05:43 "Both Democrats and Republicans made the Fourteenth Amendment the central focus of their campaigns [in 1866]... In the middle of this grand debate, an event occurred in the city of New Orleans which ... decisively turned the country in favor of adopting the Fourteenth Amendment ." 08 May 2014     03:19 GOA Helps Defeat Bloomberg-backed Gun Control in Yet another State -- Meanwhile, the Supreme Court refuses to hear important gun case “As applied to the States through the Fourteenth Amendment [in McDonald], the right to keep and bear arms belongs to all citizens of New Jersey, not just to a privileged few selected by the state.” -- Gun Owners of America’s legal brief before the U.S. Supreme Court in Drake v. Jerejian 08 May 2014     00:59 Help make it happen for Fourteenth Amendment Center on 08 May 2014     00:32 Homosexuality should NEVER be a topic to discuss with children. They have enough on their minds without confusing and trying to sexualize them. "Homosexuality would never have become a problem until liberals on the left politicized it. *** rights are being used to destroy the First and Fourteenth Amendments to the Constitution, which was the real motive behind re-defining the word marriage to include homosexual relationships. Homosexuals, through the *** agenda, want to sexualize children in the public schools at a young age and to persuade them that the homosexual lifestyle is not only normal, but in many ways superior to heterosexual families. If you disagree with *** you are persecuted as a homophobe, or if you want to run your business according to conscience and religious observances, *** will destroy that business rather than to do business with people who share their views, of which there are certainly many alternatives. These are dangerous practices for any healthy culture, and as such, some n ... 08 May 2014     00:08 If anybody needs a copy of a letter to refuse testing: From: William and Wendy Mitchell (parents of Jeremy Schoblocher, 7th grade) Date: May 4, 2014 Re: NJASK, Standardized Testing, et al. Please be informed that, I am writing on behalf of my child, Jeremy Schoblocher. Please accept this letter as formal notice that we are officially refusing to let him take the NJASK and any other state standardized test from now until the end of the school year. I am not permitting the school district to administer the exam to him at any time, to include mandated testing days as well as scheduled makeup days. I am permitting the proctor to confirm his refusal (if needed and without creating spectacle). Please have his test scored as “Void” (or V2) per the NJASK Score Interpretation Manual 3-8 on page 33 and again on page 69 of Appendix A. This is a PARENTAL refusal; and should not be marked as behavioral or disruption. We have many objections to this type of HIGH STAKES testing and the damage it’s doing to stude . ... 07 May 2014     23:41 From our friends a the Fourteenth Amendment Center (FAC):... 07 May 2014     23:39 From our friends at the Fourteenth Amendment Center aka FAC. 07 May 2014     22:27 Arkansas town imposes 'martial law' style lockdown David Edwards and Diane Sweet Published: Tuesday August 12, 2008 StumbleUpon Print This Email This HELENA-WEST HELENA - A neighborhood here is on police lock down, all over a $6, or maybe $8, debt. The feud started earlier this week, when a man recently released from jail refused to pay the money back to a neighbor, residents and authorities said. A group of men jumped the ex-inmate and fired guns into the air and into homes, mostly after dark, residents and authorities said, prompting some people to sleep on the floors for fear of being struck by stray bullets. The man and his buddies retaliated - with guns, as well - turning the already high crime neighborhood into what residents said sounded for a few nights like a combat zone. As a consequence, Mayor James Valley on Thursday called for a lockdown of the roughly 10-block neighborhood northwest of City Hall, in what was formerly West Helena. No loitering. No walking the streets. "No hanging out." On Th ... 07 May 2014     22:17 The Fourteenth Amendment "due process clause" applies directly to states. When a governmental agency is established to pay state or federal 07 May 2014     20:27 NYPD sued for raiding dead man’s apartment at least 12 times, trying to arrest him: Karen Fennell says NYPD officers have raided her Brooklyn apartment at least a dozen times since her husband, James Jordan Sr., died, including four times already this year. The raids were happening so frequently that Fennell was “forced to take the extraordinary step of affixing James E. Jordan’s Death Certificate on their front door indicating that James E. Jordan passed away in March 2006,” the lawsuit says. But still, the raids did not stop. "On virtually each and every occasion that defendant officers unlawfully entered into the plaintiffs' home, they proceeded to perform a warrantless search of the said home," the suit continued. “I tell them over and over, ‘James isn’t here! He’s dead! It’s that simple. What’s so difficult to understand about that?’” Fennell told the New York Post. But the cops still enter and ransack the house. “They tell me to be quiet or they’ll lock me up. So they go ... 07 May 2014     18:47 ...of the Fourteenth Amendment by Kurt T. Lash and, if so, do you believe his historical review to be persuasive? 07 May 2014     18:32 This is what I wrote to the FCC chairman Tom Wheeler, openinternet(a shrill for the cable companies who he worked for on and off for YEARS!) on Net Neutrality: Freedom of the press, one of Americans basic rights accorded to us, we the people, through the US Constitution and Bill of Rights, INCLUDES A FREE AND OPEN INTERNET! If America expects to remain a FREE Country, and All equal under the law, then a Free Press and a Free and open internet is to be regarded as sacrosanct! As Freedom of information is vital to American Democracy! The issue regarding Net Neutrality speaks to the very foundation of the Freedom of the Press in the Bill of Rights. Should you scrap this very basic right of American people, then you scrap the Bill of Rights! "The most effectual means of preventing [the perversion of power into tyranny are] to illuminate, as far as practicable, the minds of the people at large, and more especially to give them knowledge of those facts which history exhibits, that possessed thereby of the exper ... 07 May 2014     17:42 State Actor: In United States law, a state actor is a person who is acting on behalf of a governmental body, and is therefore subject to regulation under the United States Bill of Rights, including the First, Fifth and Fourteenth Amendments, which prohibit the federal and state governments from violating certain rights and freedoms. 07 May 2014     17:11 The New Orleans riot of 1866 and the original understanding of the Fourteenth Amendment. 07 May 2014     16:29 [Eugene Volokh] [Kurt Lash, guest-blogging] The New Orleans Riot of 1866 and the public… 07 May 2014     15:42 Does Reince Priebus understand that Republican candidates and office holders are driving voters away from the GOP? What kind of strategy is it to *** off all the major voter groups? Republican tactics so far: make voting harder by bringing back Jim Crow laws; economically hurt unemployed middle-class families; refuse to hike the minimum wage and keep the working poor on Food Stamps; give the rich more tax breaks that they do not want or need; continue the hard line on immigration to include family separations; plan to cut Social Security and Medicaid; repeal Obamacare and take healthcare insurance away from millions of Americans; cut military veterans benefits; maintain discrimination against women's equality and their choice on abortion; continue to bust police and teacher unions and dissolve retirement benefits for millions of state and municipal employees; subvert the U.S. Constitution by establishing Christianity as the official religion and repealing the fourteenth amendment to take away freedoms fo ... 07 May 2014     15:38 The Parliament of Bangladesh is a unicameral legislature consisting of 300 members. They are directly elected from an equal number of territorial constituencies, which is one from each constituency, on the basis of adult franchise. Earlier there used to be 30 seats reserved for women who were elected by the directly elected Members. This provision in the Constitution for the reservation of seats for women was a transitory one. The 7th Parliament was the last Parliament to have this reservation. With the exception of the first Parliament, which had 15 reserved seats for women, and the fourth Parliament, which had no such reservation, all previous Parliaments (before 8th Parliament) of Bangladesh had included the 30 reserved seats. In the 8th Parliament the Constitution (Fourteenth Amendment) Act, 2004 was passed by the Parliament on May 2004 by which the following provision was inserted in the constitution of Bangladesh: Art. 65(3) "Until the dissolution of Parliament occurring next after the expiration of ... 07 May 2014     14:27 Claim by pro-discrimination lawyer makes clear the contradictions in SCOTUS reading of Fourteenth Amendment. 07 May 2014     12:30 At the time of its ratification, such an elastic and expansive reading of the Fourteenth Amendment would not have been conceivable. (essay by Allen Porter Mendenhall) 07 May 2014     05:37 YES, GAZILLION TIMES! HE SHOULD BE PROSECUTED TO THE FULLEST EXTENT OF THE LAW BECAUSE OF THE 25 CHARGES OF TREASON HE COMMITTED! - OBAMA'S 25 CHARGES OF TREASON: Where’s Darrel Issa? Posted on April 24, 2014 WHERES DARRELL? “The administration has repeatedly put its partisan agenda above the rule of law,” committee chairman Lamar Smith (R-Texas) said. “In doing so, it has eroded the constitutional and legal foundation that have kept America prosperous and free for over 200 years.” Smith enumerated other instances of alleged presidential overreach, including Obama’s decision to stop enforcing parts of U.S. immigration law to allow illegal aliens to stay in the country legally if they meet certain criteria and waivers issued to the No Child Left Behind Act and welfare reform bill that Smith said “effectively rewrite the law instead of enforcing it.” “Just because you don’t like a law, doesn’t mean you can ignore it,” Smith said. “Many people have gone to jail for doing just that. ... 07 May 2014     05:24 If we don't stand for something; we will fall for everything else! I am my brother's keeper. We are somebody! So we stand for everybody's right to live as a free person in America... It's time to honor the Constitution of the United States and don't backdown, because African Americans was once originally thought of as less than a full citizen, but the thirteenth and fourteenth amendment say we are a whole citizen and deserving all the rights of the Constitution and the bill of rights. Now are you or do you want to doubt those statements, because other people want to deny its existence {should you agree with their beliefs and/or just roll over and die for them to practice their violent beliefs against yourselves and your children's continue and comfortable existence}. Do you not; see your selves as whole human being with feelings and needs to exist or survive? Than; should you not stand as a human being of importance; unafraid about what others may say that is contradict to the thirteenth and fourteenth am ... 07 May 2014     02:32 In general, incorporation is a good thing, but I don't know you can reasonably derive that from the Fourteenth Amendment's text. 07 May 2014     01:43 Interesting history of the original meaning of the Priv and Immunity Clause 07 May 2014     01:07 ! Patrick King ! Wrongful incarceration? !!! Not my highschool homeboy!!!... Let me show you why they gotta pay Pat! Study this homeboy... U.S. Supreme Court Davis v. Mississippi, 394 U.S. 721 (1969) Davis v. Mississippi No. 645 Argued February 26-27, 1969 Decided April 22, 1969 394 U.S. 721 CERTIORARI TO THE Supreme Court OF MISSISSIPPI Syllabus In connection with a rape investigation the Meridian, Mississippi, police, without warrants, brought numerous *** youths to the police station for questioning and fingerprinting. Petitioner was thus questioned and fingerprinted, and released. Thereafter, concededly without a warrant or probable cause for arrest, the police drove petitioner to Jackson and confined him in jail overnight. After he was questioned and signed a statement, he was returned to Meridian and jailed. While so confined, he was again fingerprinted and these prints were sent to the FBI for comparison with latent prints found in the victim's home. The fingerprint evidence was admitted at ... 06 May 2014     19:45 The trial judge, Honorable Stanley D. Steins, Assistant State's Attorney, James Heuerman, and my trial council, the now Honorable William S. McNeal, all knew of the exculpatory and otherwise impeaching material contained on the video, taken from Officer Vondra's taser, and with this knowledge, the state, the court, and Trial Council McNeal intentionally attempted to conceal from the Record, without lawful authority, and through a deliberate deception of the court, evidence establishing that Sgt. Fisher and Officer Vondra provided the court with false testimony through the State's presentation of knowingly false evidence, which is incompatible with the rudimentary demands of justice, and thus violating my rights, secured by the Fifth, Sixth, and Fourteenth Amendments of the U.S. Constitution. 06 May 2014     18:25 Just wanted to let you know that I was successful in REFUSING to allow my daughter to sit through the 6th grade (middle school) Virginia standardized tests this year (called SOLs here). I spoke with the assistant principal today after she read our email using this blurb: As her parents, it is our right as her parents to chose this option for our child as parental rights are broadly protected by United States Supreme Court decisions (Meyer and Pierce), especially in the area of education. The Supreme Court has repeatedly held that parents possess the “fundamental right” to “direct the upbringing and education of their children.” Furthermore, the Court declared that “the child is not the mere creature of the State: those who nurture him and direct his destiny have the right coupled with the high duty to recognize and prepare him for additional obligations.” (Pierce v. Society of Sisters, 268 U.S. 510, 534-35) The Supreme Court criticized a state legislature for trying to interfere “with the .. ... 06 May 2014     17:59 Ronald Kyle Bradd 6 May 2014 Civil Rights vs. Indefinite Detention The National Defense Authorization Act is a bill passed each year on New Year. This is to provide funding for the United States Military and Defense. Recently, very controversial legislation was added to the NDAA for Fiscal Year of 2012. This legislation allows for indefinite detention without the right of trial of anyone suspected of, assisting, or being affiliated with terrorists. This directly violates the United States Constitution but people seem to think that we can maintain Constitutional Rights and indefinite detention, without the right to trial, for the “really scary bad people” in our society. The pages of this enormous bill that you want to read, if interested, are pages 266 and 267. Sec. 1021 & 1022 under subtitle D- Counterterrorism. Section 1021 starts off by reaffirming the Authorization for Use of Military Force or AUMF of 2001. This is a retroactive law that was created to capture those responsible for the 9/11 attack ... 06 May 2014     17:16 To prohibit alcohol, an amendment was needed. To prohibit cannabis, just an act, and federal agency. To start an income tax...an amendment was passed. To prohibit the income tax...can we just pass a law? To bring the Senate back into it's original role, we must repeal an amendment to the constitution...but to save the children from guns, we just pass a law to infringe on the Second Amendment ? To gain the right to vote, amendments were passed that grant suffrage to women, and the thirteenth and fourteenth amendments were passed that forbid states from treating blacks and whites differently...but to punish hate crimes, give affirmative action and other unequal protections under the law...simple laws were passed to make it unequal and OK. Now...can anyone really say we are "indivisible, with liberty and justice for all"? 06 May 2014     12:57 In breaking news, the SCOTUS has declared the First and Fourteenth Amendments to the Constitution to be null and void. 06 May 2014     01:42 "I don't mind due process but I HATE equal protection"-on the Fourteenth Amendment 05 May 2014     19:18 Fourteenth amendment states everyone should be protected under the law. 05 May 2014     18:44 Does paying federal taxes violate the fourteenth amendment, by the way? Just wondering 05 May 2014     16:34 It's going to blow people's minds when they realize the Fourteenth Amendment casts serious doubt on those bans, too. 05 May 2014     13:31 The Fourteenth Amendment Center, which I (Jared Dalen; part time admin of ASNM) am co-founder of, is a group of... 05 May 2014     02:57 More cool stuff, from the pen of a student, about Abe Lincoln, Marlon Hargis: Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent. Lincoln's mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands. When Lincoln was President, he wore only a tall silk hat. He said, "In onion there is strength." Abraham Lincoln wrote the Gettysburg address while traveling from Washington to Gettysburg on the back of an envelope. He also signed the Emasculation Proclamation, and the Fourteenth Amendment gave the ex-Negroes citizenship. But the Clue Clux Clan would torcher and lynch the ex-Negroes and other innocent victims. On the night of April 14, 1865, Lincoln went to the theater and got shot in his seat by one of the actors in a moving picture show. The believed assinator was John Wilkes Booth, a supposedly insane actor. This ruined Booth's career. 04 May 2014     20:12 If people are going to scream " First Amendment " may I point at the Thirteenth, Fourteenth and Fifteenth Amendment s? 03 May 2014     20:30 Since Reconstruction, the Fourteenth Amendment - especially the Equal Protection Clause - has been applied to a number of cases. 03 May 2014     16:31 Kurt Lash guest-blogging about ‘The Fourteenth Amendment and the Privileges and Immunities of American Citizenship’ 03 May 2014     12:03 "Do you have to obey the fourteenth amendment?"... 02 May 2014     20:42 Volokh Conspiracy: Prof. Kurt Lash (Illinois) guest-blogging next week about ‘The Fourteenth Amendment and the... 02 May 2014     17:36 The Fourteenth Amendment, ratified on July 9, 1868, reads as follows. Section 1: All persons born or naturalized in the United States... 02 May 2014     17:05 14th Amendment to most influential after the Bill of Rights: 01 May 2014     19:41 Great summary of 14th Amendment's significance from Annenberg (… 01 May 2014     18:51 "...the Federal Constitution, by virtue of the Fourteenth Amendment, prohibits unreasonable searches and seizures by state officers." 01 May 2014     14:18 just like the Fourteenth Amendment is what matters in mine :P 25 Apr 2014     21:51 (Kevin C. Walsh) "Does Congress have authority under Section 5 of the Fourteenth Amendment to enact DOMEA?" 24 Apr 2014     13:16 I am shocked and saddened to see our politicians on both sides of the aisle so recklessly and blatantly pander to a single special interest group despite the opposition of restaurant and bar owners associations, Federal Transportation Security Administration, a broad interfaith coalition of religious leaders including Episcopal and Catholic churches, national & state parent & teacher organizations as well as the state’s police chiefs association. There are many responsible, conscientious, law abiding gun owners in our state and when one considers the application of the new provisions to this group, it may appear reasonable. However, while the Second Amendment may guarantee the right to bear arms, the Fourteenth Amendment guarantees "equal protection under the laws." Essentially, the same liberties, easing of restrictions and general limits on governmental monitoring and control that these experienced, "responsible," gun owners advocate for themselves, will also be extended and guaranteed to the most " . ... 29 Mar 2014     19:05 UNREASONABLE SEARCH AND SEIZURE A search and seizure by a law enforcement officer without a search warrant and without probable cause to believe that evidence of a crime is present. Such a search or seizure is unconstitutional under the Fourth Amendment (applied to the states by the Fourteenth Amendment), and evidence obtained from the unlawful search may not be introduced in court. 20 Mar 2014     15:05 "Freedom of Religion The First Amendment to the Constitution protects freedom of religion by banning Congress from passing any law respecting an establishment of religion and from prohibiting people from freely exercising their religion. The Supreme Court has applied these limits to state governments through the Fourteenth Amendment." There should be NO OTHER NEED FOR A Religious Freedom Bill. What there should be is people PRACTICING WHAT THEY PREACH! 06 Mar 2014     17:10 "The difference between [people who take civil liberties seriously] and others ... is that such serious people begin with a constitutional understanding that declines to trivialize the Second Amendment or the Fourteenth Amendment, just as they likewise decline to trivialize any other right expressly identified elsewhere in the Bill of Rights. It is difficult to see why they are less than entirely right in this unremarkable view. That it has taken the NRA to speak for them, with respect to the Second Amendment , moreover, is merely interesting -- perhaps far more as a comment on others, however, than on the NRA." -- William Van Alstyne Professor at Duke University School of Law, served on National Board of the ACLU Source: The Second Amendment and the Personal Right to Arms, 43 DUKE L. J. 1236, 1254 (1994) 01 Mar 2014     01:57 Newsflash: The Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals has just ruled that Biology's ban on same-sex couples' having children is a violation of the Fourteenth Amendment's Equal Protection Clause . 28 Feb 2014     05:27 A long fight and a close call... From Wikipedia: "Two rival organizations, the National Woman Suffrage Association (NWSA) and the American Woman Suffrage Association (AWSA), were formed in 1869.[3] The NWSA, led by suffrage leaders Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B. Anthony, attempted several unsuccessful court challenges in the mid-1870s.[8] Their legal case, known as the New Departure strategy, was that the Fourteenth Amendment (granting universal citizenship) and Fifteenth Amendment (granting the vote irrespective of race) together served to guarantee voting rights to women. Three Supreme Court decisions from 1873 to 1875 rejected this argument, so these groups shifted to advocating for a new constitutional amendment.[10]" "On January 12, 1915, a proposal to amend the Constitution to provide for women's suffrage was brought before the House of Representatives, but was defeated by a vote of 204 to 174. Another proposal was brought before the House on January 10, 1918. During the previous evening, Presi ... 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18

Of Beavis and Butt-head, which one wore the AC/DC t-shirt?

Share your Opinion with the Legislature May-24-2015 Against I object to amending Article 1 Section 11 by a statutory enactment. I object to nullifying the inalienable right of self defense protected by Article 1 Section 1. I object to the cancellation of citizenship for the conviction of a misdemeanor. May-23-2015 For This writer's opinion regarding SB175 is POSITIVE and as a Voting Constituent in the 89117 Zip, I ask that legislator(s) vote FOR SB175.gmb May-22-2015 For For those who helped pass this bill, congratulations. For those that opposed it, we'll see you next election. May-22-2015 May-22-2015 For I am elated that this legislature has moved this bill to the Governors office for his signature. It has been too long in coming. I urge Governor Sandoval to sign into Nevada Law SB175 and thank you from all Nevadans. May-22-2015 May-19-2015 Against It's disgusting and reprehensible how the sponsors have tied their extremist 2nd Amendment agenda to a potentially useful bill (re: domestic violence). May-19-2015 Yes! Watered down, but still good. May-19-2015 Against I can support this bill if the campus carry amendment is removed. If this us done, I will be in favor of the bill. May-18-2015 May-18-2015 Against Still very unhappy with this legislation- want to see mandatory safety education at all NSHE schools! If this is passed please include money for staff at all NSHE schools to protect themselves from gun carrying folks! Fiore missed her opportunity to revamp or look at current safety currently in place at NSHE schools- talk to folks get some opinions- very, very disappointed in her disregard for safety of state work force!! We already have a lot of problems with low morale and under appreciation for our work now this! Make some adjustments- require public safety education!! Beef up current police protection- look at establishing satellite police stations at dorm areas, parking garages-require safety training for non-police employees- install panic buttons where needed!! This could be excellent legislation but not they way it's written. Thanks for your consideration of any ideas May-16-2015 May-13-2015 For We need this bill passed. It's fact bassed common sense. This will pass the test of time. May-13-2015 May-13-2015 For Mr Brower & Mr Hansen, let SB 175 out of committee and come to a vote. Protect our 2nd amendment rights by supporting this bill. May-13-2015 For This should be very high priority to be voted on and PASSED. Action or inaction will be remembered in the next election. May-13-2015 For Over all support but so much has been lumped into this bill, they really need to let them stand alone and STOP muddling everything together! May-13-2015 For Gun laws should be consistent across the state. Clark County should have no additional requirements and cities need to be consistent with state as well to avoid confusion, and prevent people from accidentally breaking laws just by driving to a different location within the state. As a small woman w/physical limitations I feel more able to defend myself if I can carry my handgun in a quickly accessible location. May-12-2015 I strongly support this legislation. May-12-2015 Apr-22-2015 Against While introducing excellent provisions, this bill also tries to get provisions into law that would be just like taking one step forward and two steps back. We cannot afford to move backwards on these issues. Please oppose this bill. Apr-22-2015 For Nevada Law makes reserves for the legislature the authority to regulate firearms, The people must have have the ability to challenge local city and county ordinances which conflict with Nevada revised statutes in civil court. Clark County Handgun registration is nothing more than a black hole for police funds that has rarely if ever aided in the capture of an offender or contributed to the location of lost or stolen firearms. Apr-22-2015 Mar-28-2015 For We need this law in place to deter criminals, knowing they can be counteracted by lawful use of self defense. Police are not obligated by law to safeguard any ones life so self defense is really up to the individual-you are your own first responder! Mar-25-2015 For This is one of the most important bills to approve. People may be defenseless trapped in their cars, or at a mall parking lot, and when they enter their cars are defenseless unless they are able to save their lives with a firearm. A carjacker who can kill a person to take her car can be stopped, if the victim can use deadly force to save her life. Mar-25-2015 Mar-18-2015 For Please take personal responsibility to lead this legislative package to successful enactment. Our family and the citizens of the Great State of Nevada will truly benefit by enactment of these provisions. A side benefit is financial benefit to tax payers of the County of Clark by saving the expense of continuing the non-beneficial "blue card" requirement long supported by the local sheriff to, essentially, keep employment going for friends of the sheriff. Mar-18-2015 For Neither Clark County,North Las Vegas, nor any other local government should be allowed to institute provisions restricting the carrying of, and enforcing the registration of, hand guns in conflict with the rest of the state. There should be one law for everyone with no exceptions. Mar-18-2015 In support of this bill. Mar-18-2015 Mar-18-2015 For John Lott testified to all of the relevant information on ccw and the Castle Doctrine. It is time to overcome the anti-gun hysteria which prevents ordinary citizens from properly being able to defend themselves and their homes. Mar-18-2015 For It is past time to implement TRUE pre-emption and rid Nevada of patchwork laws that provide no actual benefit. Mar-18-2015 Mar-17-2015 For When seconds count the police are only minutes away! You took an oath to uphold and to protect the US Constitution so please quit trying to destroy our rights, do your JOB and pass this law! Mar-17-2015 For VOTE YES. We need this Bill to reinforce our Constitutionally Protected Rights. Even though the US and Nevada Constitution's already support the Rights contained in this Bill, and beyond, the Rights addressed in this bill are not being recognized. This will correct these injustices. On another subject in the Bill, ********REDACT******** the section that states, "prohibiting a person against whom an extended order for protection against domestic violence is issued from subsequently purchasing or otherwise acquiring any firearm during the period the extended order is in effect; revising provisions governing civil liability in actions involving the use of force" Mar-17-2015 For I fully support this act. My wife holds a CCW here in Clark County. She practices her shooting skills regularly in order to protect herself and our six children. She is a full-time nursing student at CSN. Many of her classes are at night. CSN has security, but not enough to safely see to it that every member of the campus makes it to their cars safely. As it stands right now, my wife is fully qualified to defend herself against those that would do her harm, but state law bars her from doing so on campus. The criminals know this. They know they can take advantage of women like my wife who had they been approached at Albertsons, would be able to defend themselves. At school however, they are sitting ducks. Please pass this legislation and allow women like my wife to protect themselves. Send a message to the criminals of this state that we will no longer allow our women and children to be sitting ducks! Mar-17-2015 For This sounds good but I don't see any mention in this bill about a person who has or is being treated for a mental condition. Yes domestic violence is covered has always been. The loophole is mental conditions and of course people who don't care about the laws of the land. This is a good bill, but a guess invetigating one's privacy is more important than keeping fire arms from a person who really should not have access to a firearm. Also one can not get a gun legally without a background check so you probably won't find too many people going to a gun show to try and purchase a gun they can't get past the Brady bill. The loophole as I mentioned is the mental questions which ARE COVERED on the application to apply for CCW. Mar-17-2015 Good 2nd amendment reform bill! Please vote YES! Mar-15-2015 Mar-15-2015 For This bill offers SOME remedies to issues that I care about and also some problems. No one should have to face a criminal investigation for protecting themselves from an attacker while in their car and defending themselves. That much is CLEAR. The Clark country gun registration should END. But people convicted of a MISDEMEANOR should not have their constitutional rights abrogated. Yes domestic violence is wrong. But not all cases are the same and in many instances some people may have pled to a misdemeanor to stop fighting a legal problem they could not afford to fight and the consequences to a decision THEN are not what is proposed to be in effect NOW. This bill will mean that some people would lose their jobs and rights. Their ought not to be a permanent disabling of ones gun rights for a misdeamor convictions. This must be remedied. This is a backdoor attempt to initiate MORE gun control and if we agree that domestic violence is wrong, then lets agree that there needs to be sufficient proff that that is the problem and not a simply a case where someone pled out to stop a prosecution so they could exit a bad realtionship. This should be at lease changed so that it is a temporary restriction with a path toward reclaiming ones rights. Also--reciprocity should be acknowledged and made a part of this bill again. States all across the country have recognized the rights of citizens to be armed as guaranteed by our constitution. For this state to abrogate this right through not recognizing other states licensing means WE are also handicapped in their states. Reinstate the reciporcity. Nevada should assert its claim of soverighty within its border by making it clear that cities such as North Las Vegas do not have the right to prohibit people from carrying a gun in their vehicle. We should not try to tell people from Arizona or other constitutional states that their people cannot carry a gun here. Do the right thing. Our citizens have the rights our Constitution lays out. Mar-15-2015 Mar-15-2015 For It is an onerous violation of equal protection to require the legal owners of handguns in Clark County to register them. Mar-15-2015 Mar-14-2015 For This bill as erroneously described by most against is NOT about stand your ground it is about protecting oneself from a car jacking and clarify laws on the books to make certain law abiding citizens are protected if they use deadly force against a criminal trying to car jack them and the law abiding citizen is in fear for their or their family's life. The reciprocity section will allow those law abiding citizens of other states to conceal carry in Nevada which will open the door for other states to honor Nevada Concealed Carry Permit holders. This does not allow prohibited persons from carrying concealed in Nevada as many of the against claim. Nevada already is an open carry state and anyone, EXCEPT prohibited persons, can carry in Nevada. This bill allows for only concealed carry permit holders to be honored here in Nevada. The bill also allows for the State to control firearm laws and rids citizens in Clark County, the only county in the state, from having to register their firearm. The government does not need to know what guns LAW ABIDING citizens own. Prohibited person are banned from possessing firearms so if caught they are breaking the law. Lets uphold the constitutional right to bear arms across the whole of Nevada and stop inflicting those in Clark County to restrictions. All Nevadans should be held to the same standard. Thank you for helping to use common sense in supporting our 2nd Amendment. Mar-14-2015 Mar-14-2015 For Not supporting this means you support criminals and not law abiding citizens. Do your job and help Americans(Nevadans) in protecting themselves. Thank you! Mar-14-2015 This bill is common sense, only the looniest of individuals would oppose. Mar-14-2015 Common sense amendments to the existing law. And, welcome to the 21st century. Mar-14-2015 Please don't pass this bill. Mar-13-2015 For I am all for the bill except for the part about loosing your second amendment right due to a domestic violence misdemeanor. I was falsely accused by two sisters and arrested for domestic violence because they wanted me out of my and my fathers house after he passed away. Fortunately I had a friend over who say what happened. No way should you loose your gun rights over a misdemeanor! Mar-13-2015 Mar-13-2015 Against This bill is ill-conceived and ill-advised. It will do nothing to enhance public safety - quite the contrary. There is no such thing as "justifiable homicide". Mar-13-2015 Mar-09-2015 Against Local control of weapons is a long standing custom in America. Local control is the best control. Justice Alito plainly stated in DC v. Heller that local control is the best option for deciding where and what kinds of weapons can be carried and how they can be carried. This bill violates the principles of conservative government and flies in the face of established law. Mar-09-2015 Against This bill is a mess. Keeping guns out of the hands of domestic abusers is a very good thing. But the rest of the provisions in this bill are ridiculous and definitely should NOT become law. Mar-09-2015 Against Nevada already has a carefully considered concealed weapons permit system in place. SB175 would set a national bar at the lowest denominator. We should not lower our public safety standards to the lowest level or allow other states to determine our safety standards. SB175 would jeopardize public safety in Nevada by allowing stalkers, domestic abusers, child abusers and people wanted for violent crimes to carry hidden loaded guns in our communities -- even in schools and on college campuses. SB175 overly broadens the definition of “justifiable killing” to include, among other situations, anyone attempting to steal your car or who intends to enter your car to commit a felony. Expanding this law would only increase unnecessary violence. Mar-09-2015 Mar-06-2015 Against I believe the subjects of this bill should each be legislated separately. I more specifically object to the acceptance of concealed carry permits from other states and for adjusting or changing civil liability for the use of force. Mar-06-2015 Mar-06-2015 For I am a ret LE officer from Dade County Fl. My wife and i have retired to reno. I am also a ret ICE employee. Dade makes Vegas look like a walt disney stroll. In 20 yrs, ive never seen a crime committed by anyone who had a carry permit. Its not the street cops that are against this bill, its the chiefs of police who in my opinion are no longer cops. they are politicians. With all the insanity going on and with a usurper in the white house, taking advantages for carrying a weapon will lead to potential problems with criminals and those that want to destroy this country. do not let upper management in police depts sway this bill. The anti gun people in this state are being funded by bloomberg out of nyc who is a staunch anti gun left winger. pass this bill Mar-06-2015 Against I support this provision ONLY: prohibiting a person convicted in this State or any other state of a misdemeanor crime of domestic violence from owning or having in his or her possession or under his or her custody or control any firearm Mar-05-2015 Mar-04-2015 For I support this w/ the exception for this par: prohibiting a person convicted in this State or any other state of a misdemeanor crime of domestic violence from owning or having in his or her possession or under his or her custody or control any firearm; which is just massive over reach. Misdemeanors shoUld not be irrevocable. There is too much room for abuse here. Mar-04-2015 Against Because this is a confused, convoluted bill with a mish-mash of provisions, some of which contribute to public safety and others that pander to mass hysteria. A vague summary and the bill title runs to 20 lines, what a mess. Mar-04-2015 Mar-02-2015 Against At a time in our nation's history where the majority of the people want stricter gun control laws, this bill sends a message to the people that our elected officials do not care for the well-being of its citizens, nor their will to have stricter gun control laws. Nevada is currently the third most violent state in the nation and passing this bill would surely send the state into first position. This bill must not pass for the good of the people. Mar-02-2015 Mar-01-2015 Against This is the most appalling legislation of the session. As an attorney with expertise in domestic violence, I find it completely unacceptable to lessen restrictions on domestic abusers' rights to firearms. NV has a huge problem with violence against women - why don't you try to protect women, rather than make them more vulnerable to violence. Why is the legislature even considering a bill to help men who assault women? Mar-01-2015 Feb-27-2015 For I love this bill EXCEPT for the part that dismantles the constitution be removing the right to own firearms by those that have been convicted of domestic violence. This can be built on later to include anything else such as misdemeanors, hate speech, etc. remove this provision and the Bill is a winner! Feb-27-2015 Against Remove the 2nd Amendment infringing language contained in the bill and reintroduce it as separate stand alone bills. Vote in favor of the other items in the bill that promote the 2nd Amendment, but vote down the anything that prevents individuals convicted of domestic violence or any other crime from purchasing a firearm. Feb-27-2015 SB 175 endangers the safety of women and all minorities in the state of Nevada. Feb-27-2015 For I am all for this bill except the domestic violence and restraining order part of it. I feel it is TO intrusive. Feb-27-2015 Against I don't believe this bill will make anyone safer. On the contrary, it will cause more violence and injuries. Feb-27-2015 Feb-26-2015 Against Whose opinion is really right when it comes to murder with a deadly weapon being "justifiable"? The dead can't speak. What does this all really mean when we aim to arm every American with a deadly weapon, for no reason, other than to commit "justifiable" homicide? Does this bill make Nevada a better place to live and do business or does it make Nevada the largest insane asylum in the country? This bill is just sad. Feb-26-2015 Against I do not like the idea of someone convicted of a misdemeanor losing a right granted to them by The Bill of Rights. Other than that, I like what this Bill does. Feb-26-2015 Feb-26-2015 For It's time for us to acknowledge that more guns = less crime. Only the good law abiding citizens follow laws, whether it is when and where you can carry a gun, or whether you should shoot someone or not. Feb-26-2015 Feb-26-2015 Against This Bill is not an anti domestic violence bill. This is unfortunately a vigilante bill. This give a shoot first ask questions later to individuals that carry weapons with them. No matter the rhetoric this does not protect anyone other than the "gun toters". Once a victim is dead there is no way to discover what actually happened. A young person of color approaches a car to ask directions a very frightened old white man kills him. During the investigation no weapons is found, nothing to indicate that the young man was actually threatening this poor old man, but because of the presumption of supposed violence a young man is dead and has no opportunity to tell his side. This is dangerous and racist. Everyone knows that this is an ALEC and NRA bill. To add the "domestic violence" section is opportunity to make untrue statements that those in opposition are apposed to protecting those violent relationships, which is a canard. I urge the defeat of this bill. Feb-26-2015 Feb-26-2015 Against The Stand Your Ground portion of this bill doesn't change existing law except to say that the shooter just has to believe that force is being used. Basically this bill is being used to justify racial violence- as proved by the testimony yesterday. If any of these people actually wanted to work for domestic violence (theoretically the point of this bill) they would not only make it illegal for people who have been convicted of domestic violence to own guns, they would mandate surrender upon conviction (happens <1% of cases in NV). Nevada is the eighth worst in the country for the rate at which women are murdered by guns. LETS ACTUALLY WORK TO PROTECT SURVIVORS rather than push the money line of ALEC and the NRA. Feb-26-2015 Feb-26-2015 Against While some portions of this bill are good, allowing citizens to use deadly force when ever they feel "threatened" will only increase our already violent streets. Also, recognizing CCW permits from other states, is dangerous. Despite law enforcements best efforts, permits can easily be faked from out of state allowing dangerous, illegal weapons in our communities. Feb-26-2015 Feb-25-2015 Against The true meaning of this bill is disguised by its confusing wording. You speak of "revising" and "repealing" "certain provisions," when the end result is guns everywhere for everyone. This is the logic that would advise putting out a fire by pouring gasoline on it. Someone is stuck back in the wild, wild, west, when people reasoned with guns. You're taking the civil out of civil discourse and risking lives. Gunmakers I'm sure are appreciating anyone supporting this bill. Feb-25-2015 Against Today gun violence in this country occurs daily. Lessening the limited gun controls in this state for a vocal few to the detriment of the majority of Nevada citizens doesn't seem to me to be a responsible action. Before allowing increased reciprocity with regard to "carrying", I think you should seriously consider the consequences of such action. Nevada has legislated certain controls on carrying yet you are considering allowing individuals from other states with few controls to carry in Nevada. It takes only one nut case to endanger the lives of many (or a few). I would ask you eliminate the reciprocity section of this bill and focus on legislation designed to curb domestic violence. I would ask you yield to the recommendation of the Clark County (Nevada's major population base) representatives who attended the hearing today (2-25-15). Feb-25-2015 I do not want concealed weapons permits from other states to carry over to NV. Feb-25-2015 Against First, I am a gun owner and strong supporter of the Second Amendment (and the rest of the Constitution). However, I am strongly opposed to SB175. In something this broad, there are bound to be unintended consequences. I am also a strong advocate of States Rights (where jurisdiction doesn’t belong to the federal government). Among my many concerns is that SB175 requires Nevada to comply with the laws of other states. Other states should have no control over Nevada laws or law enforcement. This is particularly troubling because I live in Las Vegas where we are fortunate to have constant tourism from other states. SB175 would create a very confusing and dangerous situation in that a crowd would be subject to many different gun laws, and the police would not know which gun laws applied until they were able to check the person’s ID. Further, I believe that this chaotic situation in a city known for drunken crowds in noisy and confusing public spaces would inevitably lead to incidents which would be publicized nationally and not only weaken tourism to my city and the local economy, but weaken support for the Second Amendment. Please protect me and your other constituents, our tourism industry, the Second Amendment and States Right by dropping SB175. Feb-25-2015 Feb-25-2015 Against We need less guns on the street, not more. This bill encourages more guns and more excuses for using them. If only responsible people carried guns, we might feel safe, but that is not true. Look at the local shootings, example: the so-called "road rage" killing. Just a few over the past year: a cop killed his wife and 5-year-old son; a 13-year-old shot dead after school by a friend (in my neighborhood), a 4-year-old killed by mother's boyfriend. Stop the slaughter, don't encourage it. Feb-25-2015 Feb-25-2015 Against There is no justifiable homicide. This law will make Nevada less safe and its citizens more fearful of death by concealed weapon. Feb-25-2015 Feb-25-2015 For I support this bill. However, I have concerns over the Restraining Order and the fact that a person is found guilty first in an Order of Protection without being even charged with a crime. It is one person's word against the others. There are many Restraining Orders issued that should not be. It is wrong that you are found guilty before you have been tried in a Court of Law by your peers. Many women use Restraining Orders to exact revenge and they are granted without knowing the facts. It is typically one sided in favor of the woman. I am a woman and I see every day the lopsided laws that are in favor women over men. It is not right. Feb-25-2015 Against SB175 is a "stand your ground in your vehicle law". SB 175 is an egregious attempt to further reduce public safety. Should this become law, Nevada, will see more examples of road rage becoming homicidal. This is a foolish law that would allow suspected homicides to go unpunished. In my view the only entity that would benefit from this are the gun manufacturers. Feb-25-2015 Against I am opposed to this legislation which creates a presumption of acting in fear to justify killing when defending property. It also lowers the standard within our state for carrying concealed weapons. Further, it limits the rights of cities within our state to make additional public safety ordinances. It is bad law. Feb-25-2015 Against We hear so much talk of the government being too powerful and abusing that power, and this bill further removes the power from local bodies to govern themselves and address needs that are specific to their own locality. I oppose for this reason. Feb-25-2015 Against Enough is enough. Why can't you, our state legislator listen to the reasonable constituents instead of the bullies. As multiple recent events have shown, less restrictive controls on weapons has cost many lives. Feb-25-2015 Against This looks like the NRA's Christmas wish list. It's been my belief that Nevadans support government closest to the people. In part, this bill takes authority away from local governments and gives it to the state. It's also a horrible idea to allow people to carry concealed weapons in Nevada who are from states with more lenient or no requirements. For many reasons, this is bad legislation. This is another bill in search of a reason to exist. I've seen no evidence that anyone, anywhere, any time who's carrying a concealed weapon has stopped a shooter in a school, movies theater or other public place. In fact, this bill would make it more likely that people who should not carry guns would get in shootouts. Very, very bad bill! Feb-25-2015 Feb-25-2015 Against Nothing in this bill will make our homes, cars, or communities safer. Promoting guns and the use of guns is the same as promoting violence. It will also lead to even more tragic accidents that will kill innocent people. Please oppose this menacing piece of legislation. Feb-25-2015 Against Granting a presumption of justified does not make Nevadans any safer; it actually puts innocent bystanders and spouses/intimate others at greater risk. Feb-25-2015 Against Data is conclusive that guns are more often used to injure or kill the spouses or former spouses of the gun owner than used in self-defense. This bill would make it easier for domestic abusers to obtain firearms and endanger the a abused former partners. Feb-25-2015 Against The dangerous provisions in this bill could lead to more deadly shootings and further restrict the ability of local governments to keep communities safe. Feb-25-2015 Against These changes could lead to more gun violence in our state. I'm sure that the needs more public input. Feb-25-2015 This bill further expands the presence of guns in already dangerous situations. Please vote NO. Feb-25-2015 Feb-25-2015 Against This bill would encourage a dangerous vigilante atmosphere, and would probably result in more frequent incidents of gun violence. It is not well thought out, and the reciprocity clause is not feasible--some states have very stringent laws, other states have very lax laws. Please vote NO. Feb-25-2015 Against this bill covers too many issues: each should be considered separately. if there are too many traffic deaths do we eliminate testing & licensing drivers? do too many violent deaths due to drugs make us eliminate controls on dangerous drugs? then why is the perceived solution to gun violence to widen the access to guns? this is NOT public safety....it is an open invitation to more gun play on our streets & danger to citizens & law enforcement. Feb-25-2015 Against What image do we Nevadans with to portray to the world? Do we want to be viewed as a progressive state or do we want to continue to live in the 20th century? If we want to attract progressive businesses that will continue to diversify our economy, particularly attracting businesses from states like California, I think we should oppose this bill. Thank you for your consideration. Feb-25-2015 For This bill extends the Citizen's God-given right to self-defense inside a vehicle. There are cases of car-jacking on our streets, and I want to know that I can use lethal force to defend myself, and not become a victim TWICE, first by the criminal car-jacker, then by the criminal justice system. Why would anyone oppose such a bill? Unless of course they are paid-for shills from the Michael Bloomberg propaganda office? Feb-25-2015 I strongly oppose this bill - it is dangerous in revising justifiable homicide in this way. Feb-25-2015 We need stricter laws against people having guns, and ban guns for any use. Feb-25-2015 Against With so many weapons out there, can I let my grandchildren play in the front yard? Feb-25-2015 More guns equals more gun deaths. Feb-25-2015 Against This bill is like going back to the wild west where few restraints are in place use of a firearm. When will this gun mania end? Feb-25-2015 Against This proposal is idiotic. Shame on Fiore and Roberson. Fiore is now a national laughing stock and should be forced to resign. Feb-25-2015 Against In the history of the US west historians mark progress from the frontier phase into the civilization phase by the lessening of vigilantism and the appearance of cultural and civic institutions, such as churches, schools, and professional law enforcement. Settlers gave up the practice of individual law enforcement and adopted other means of controlling crime to make towns and cities more attractive to families and to free citizens of the burden of knowing how to manage crime. This bill seems to want to take us backward in time by requiring citizens to bear the burden of engaging in personal law enforcement. To stay true to our history it would seem to be a better use of time and resources to first shore up our cultural and civic institutions and to help our professional law enforcement officers protect us all before throwing in the towel and burdening individuals with law enforcement tasks. Government shouldn't be abdicating its responsibility to protect us. Feb-25-2015 Feb-25-2015 Against This bill's stand on justifiable homicide is a terrible idea. We already have enough gun violence. It will be worse if people think they can start taking justice into their own hands and firing guns to resolve issues when they get angry. This bill will increase shooting such as road rage incidents Among other things. Stand your ground types of laws do not work for n other states. Let's Make Nevada a safe place to live by not allowing such irresponsible gun laws. We say "not one more" Yet we make it to easy in this country for there to be access to guns and for gun violence to occur.. Feb-25-2015 Against The verbiage in SB 175 is vague and incomprehensible because of the fact that it never addresses "public safety". In the bill, there are 8 gun ownership enhancing provisions to 3 weapon safety aversion items, as well as I can tell. Public safety inherently involves a facet of the concept of peace and peace is more often attained with a lessening of violence. Guns in the hands of those who aren't responsible coming to Nevada and it's liberal gun supporting citizenry could prove very dangerous. Feb-24-2015 Feb-24-2015 Against Stand your ground is a dangerous concept that has lead to the irreversible death of too many people. We must not expand it. Feb-24-2015 Do not expand stand your ground. This does not make people safer. Feb-24-2015 Against I am 100% opposed to this bill. It is a terrible idea, goes against hard facts and empirical evidence that demonstrates that this bill would make us less safe. I am a voter and I strongly encourage the legislature NOT to pass this bill. I would definitely vote against lawmakers who support this bill in future elections. Feb-24-2015 Against This bill would put weapons in the hands of people who might be prepared to kill others in anger. Also, other states might have more laxed bills and thus put Nevadans in danger. We need less firearms on the roads, not more! Feb-24-2015 Against I oppose this bill and anyone who supports it. What has our great state come to? Feb-24-2015 Against As a citizen of Nevada I do not want to worry about citizens from adjacent states coming into Nevada with concealed weapons. I am embarrassed that Nevada has a "Stand Your Ground" law and SB175 would expand on that law. Feb-24-2015 Against This is an extremely poorly written bill that will cause many problems with interpretation. If I understand the point, it is to expand who and where guns may be carreid. This is the wrong direction for our country. We have become a gun crazed society. We need to learn how to resolve conflicts without guns and without violence. We need to learn how to be civil with each other. This bill is wrong headed, as well as poorly written. Feb-24-2015 Against This bill has good and bad.. We know about the good - uniformity of gun laws across the state, and reciprocity. Unfortunately there is also bad here - felony consequences for a misdemeanor. I think we should remember that "Misdemeanor Domestic Violence" is defined to include even the threat of "violence". Does that mean if a parent tells their child, "stop it or I'm gonna smack you", that technically they could see these felony consequences? Also, domestic violence laws apply to a broad classification of people who live together, including not only spouses and their children, but even to roommates or housemates. Feb-24-2015 Against I am very opposed to this bill. This bill is an extremist, dangerous bill that will result in deaths in Nevada--domestic abusers will easily get their hands on guns, road rage shootings will be "justifiable." Nevadans do not want this bill--we do not want to die so the gun industry can make more money. I am a professional, productive member of the Nevada economy and I will leave if this bill is passed. Feb-24-2015 Feb-24-2015 Against No provisions should be made for persons with a concealed permit from another state to carry a weapon in the state of Nevada without a permit from the state of Nevada. Feb-24-2015 For This bill is too broad. It is important that local communities be able to pass their own reasonable gun safety ordinances. Their elected officials know what is needed to keep their communities safe. Nevada is not the same everywhere. reciprocity with every state is a bad idea! Feb-24-2015 Feb-24-2015 Against I do not want our civilization to go even more backward to a climate of vigilantism. I have several neighbors that are so frightened of everyone that they have 2 guard gates, security systems and guns to protect them in Henderson, one of the safest cities in the USA. They are afraid of anyone of color, or of a car that “doesn’t look like it belongs here.” Please do pass SB175 Feb-24-2015 Against vOTE NO.I think this would be a very bad mistake to have students on campus to carry firearms, there would be so many more unnecessary killings. Get more protection on campus, hire more security guards. Feb-24-2015 Against Making a law that encourages and protects the kind of lawlessness that occurred recenctly in Las Vegas (the "road rage"incident). There easily could have been an uninvolved person injured or killed had confusing legalities exisited justifying unlawful behavior. Let's not go down that road in Nevada. Feb-24-2015 Feb-24-2015 Against I'm opposed to any legislation that would make gun violence more likely to occur. This bill would certainly do that. Feb-24-2015 Simply more "gun lobby" sponsored legislation. Feb-24-2015 Feb-24-2015 For Honorable Members Of The 78th [2015] Session OF The Nevada Legislature; This is another bill that will give back the rights to the people of this great State, and at the same time it will give the same rights to the people that come to visit this beautiful State. To defend themselves from criminals, in the time of extreme need, when there is no police to help them. Specially women, who are defenseless against violent individuals. Thank You for your time and effort. Feb-24-2015 Feb-24-2015 Against The most serious deprivation of liberty that a person can inflict is killing another individual. The irreversibility of a homicide means that error discovered after a death has occurred cannot be corrected. By increasing the circumstances in which private individuals may use lethal force without fear of legal consequences, SB 175 increases the number of people who are killed without due process of law. Both Nevada's current "Stand Your Ground" laws and SB 175 have major racial implications: statistics show that when the killer and victim are of different ethnicities, whites face lesser legal consequences for homicide than do African Americans. By expanding Nevada's "Kill at Will" law, we are encouraging the escalation of already potentially violent situations. Feb-24-2015 Against I do not think it is fair that this bill seeks to take the regulation of firearms out of the hands of local governments who choose to enact more stringent regulations than the state. Local law enforcement and social services agencies are those most responsible for maintaining a safe and civil society within their jurisdictions. Taking away their ability to regulate firearms is (pun intended) removing an important weapon from their crime-fighting arsenal. Please do not support this bill. Feb-24-2015 Feb-23-2015 Against Killing another person is the most serious deprivation of liberty that a person can inflict. The irreversibility of a homicide means that error discovered after a death has occurred cannot be corrected. By increasing the circumstances in which private individuals may use lethal force without fear of legal consequences, this bill increases the number of people who are killed without due process of law. Both Nevada’s current “Stand Your Ground” laws and SB 175 have major racial implications: statistics show that when the killer and victim are of different ethnicities, white people face lesser legal consequences for homicide than do African Americans. By expanding Nevada’s “Kill at Will” law, we are also encouraging the escalation of already potentially violent situations involving vulnerable populations. Statistics show that in officer-involved shootings, the decedent is most often mentally ill or under the influence of drugs. Nevadans already have the right to defend themselves with commensurate force in situations where they face imminent harm and safe retreat is not an option. Stand Your Ground laws have nothing to do with legitimate self-defense, but instead are invitations for the use of deadly and unnecessary force. SB 175 raises serious civil liberties and racial justice concerns. Feb-23-2015 Please support this pro gun bill Feb-23-2015 Feb-23-2015 Against more background checks are needed. people with a restraining order should not be allowed to buy a gun...period! Feb-23-2015 Feb-23-2015 For SB175 eliminates gun registration which should have never existed as The Firearms Owner Protection Act of 1986 article 18 chapter 926a states;NO Registration of Firearms in the United States,Any of it's States ,Any of it's Provinces.I don't think you can be much more clear than that! Feb-23-2015 Feb-20-2015 Against I have been following SB175 and now believe it attempts to address too many issues. As a retired law enforcement officer I urge you to beware of attempts to use alleged domestic violence to pass de facto gun control and confiscation legislation by attaching domestic violence and other clauses to state preemption legislation. Domestic violence is the new attack plan for gun control advocates because they cannot win on statistical evidence and resort to an emotional appeal. I can tell you from many years of experience enforcing domestic violence restraining orders that they are not worth the paper they are issued on when a violent criminal is involved. They are also used by many divorce attorneys’ to pad their cost bill even when there has been no violence involved. These become part of the filing without any hearing or only ex parte testimony. They are also used by vindictive spouses to harass their soon to be ex. I have also seen judges issue mutual restraining order’s which deprive the petitioning spouse the ability of legally possessing a firearm for self defense. Please stay away from over broad bills. This bill should be withdrawn and new separate bills proposed. The issues involved are too important to try to address in a one size fits all proposal. Feb-20-2015 Feb-19-2015 For The right to self defense should not be stripped from the People based upon domestic violence issues. many domestic violence allegations are flat out false accusations, and the person accused may not have the education or means to fight such false allegations, resulting in conviction. If the right of the People to self defense is to be stripped from them over domestic violence allegations, then defense these allegations should be afforded by the state to those without means just as though they were accused of a crime. Feb-19-2015 For This is a great bill, that really needs to pass. A bill like this really gives legal gun owners the freedom they need. Feb-19-2015 For [*]Strengthens and clarifies state preemption of firearms laws... Oh sure, it clarifies, but there is STILL NO PENALTY CLAUSE against the offenders, who are NOT ignorant, but PURPOSELY violate already existing law. Clark County and the incorporated cities of LV and NLV, are ALREADY in violation of the EXISTING state law, with impunity. Big deal, the clarification lets us sue them, which will rarely be worth it, and can only be done AFTER we are officially harassed. They already very purposely do this harassment off the books with no paperwork. The LAW-BREAKERS deserve the jail time that they threaten the law-abiding citizens with. Feb-19-2015

i don't know

Name the book and the author: 'We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.'

Quote by Hunter S. Thompson: “We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge o...” We’d love your help. Let us know what’s wrong with this preview of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Hunter S. Thompson.

fear and loathing in las vegas by hunter s thompson

What is the name of the owl who told us “Give a hoot – don’t pollute” in a series of Public Service Announcements?

Quote by Hunter S. Thompson: “We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge o...” We’d love your help. Let us know what’s wrong with this preview of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Hunter S. Thompson.

i don't know

What relationship was shared by actors Danny DeVito and Arnold Schwarzenegger in their 1988 film, directed by Ivan Reitman?

'Twins' Sequel in the Works; Eddie Murphy Eyed to Co-Star Search ‘Twins’ Sequel in the Works; Eddie Murphy Eyed to Co-Star “Tower Heist” star Eddie Murphy would join Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito in follow-up to 1988 film Tim Kenneally | March 30, 2012 @ 11:11 AM Eddie Murphy , Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito could be sharing some brotherly love — or at least humor — on the big screen soon. A sequel to the 1988 comedy "Twins" is in the early stages of development, a spokesman for Universal Pictures told TheWrap. The plan would be for Schwarzenegger and DeVito to reprise their roles from the Ivan Reitman -directed original, with Eddie Murphy coming aboard to play a third character — presumably, a triplet sibling to Schwarzenegger and DeVito. Also read: Arnold Schwarzenegger Climbs Into "The Tomb" With Sylvester Stallone Though the project is in the early stages of gestation, it's possible that Reitman could be involved in some capacity. "Twins" starred Schwarzenegger as Julius Benedict, the product of a genetic experiment to create the perfect child. Bred and raised to be intellectually and physically superior but spiritually pure, he tracks down his long-lost sibling, the street-wise, criminally inclined Vincent (played by DeVito).

Twin

Prized by collectors, the “Inverted Jenny” is a famous what?

Arnold Schwarzenegger with Danny DeVito at the Golden Camera Awards in Germany | Daily Mail Online Arnold Schwarzenegger reunited with his frequent co-star Danny DeVito at Germany's Golden Camera Awards in Hamburg Friday. The diminutive 70-year-old proudly joined his 67-year-old friend onstage to present him with a lifetime achievement trophy. But 27 years ago, the Golden Globe-winning duo played unlikely fraternal twins in the massive hit comedy Twins. Scroll down for video   Collaborators and friends: Arnold Schwarzenegger reunited with his frequent co-star Danny DeVito at Germany's Golden Camera Awards in Hamburg Friday Chemistry: The diminutive 70-year-old proudly joined his 67-year-old friend onstage to present him with a lifetime achievement trophy Their 1988 road movie - helmed by Ivan Reitman - about tracking down their mother amassed $216.6M worldwide at the box office Universal Pictures even hired The Wedding Ringer's Josh Gad to pen a sequel called Triplets in which the Benedict brothers discover a third sibling - Eddie Murphy. But last month, the 34-year-old Frozen funnyman and the 68-year-old filmmaker both revealed the flick is 'on hold.'  Last action hero: The actor has appeared in more than 40 movies so far throughout his lengthy career Julius & Vincent Benedict: But 27 years ago, the Golden Globe-winning duo played unlikely fraternal twins in the massive hit comedy Twins Massive hit: Their 1988 road movie - helmed by Ivan Reitman - about tracking down their mother amassed $216.6M worldwide at the box office  Now that's a comedy! Universal Pictures even hired The Wedding Ringer's Josh Gad to pen a sequel called Triplets in which the Benedict brothers discover a third sibling - Eddie Murphy (pictured Sunday) 'We're about half-way there': But last month, the 34-year-old Frozen funnyman and the 68-year-old filmmaker both revealed the flick is 'on hold' (pictured 2015 and 2014) 'If there's an outpouring of [fan] affection, that may move the needle, but I think it's on hold right now,' Josh wrote on Reddit AMA . 'But everybody read the script and loved it, so I hope it sees the light of day at some point. It's there and in great shape.' And Reitman told IGN News : 'That seems to be somewhat frozen at the studio level I think. We're still working on the script. They're trying to decide whether to make it. And that's basically where it is. We're about half-way there.'   Their other baby: The Oscar-nominated producer reteamed with Arnold and Danny in 1994 to direct the forgettable male pregnancy comedy Junior alongside Emma Thompson and Frank Langella Batman & Robin and Batman Returns: Schwarzenegger and DeVito also have the distinction of both playing Batman villains - as The Penguin in 1992 as Mr. Freeze in 1997 The Oscar-nominated producer reteamed with Arnold and Danny in 1994 to direct the forgettable male pregnancy comedy Junior alongside Emma Thompson and Frank Langella. Schwarzenegger and DeVito also have the distinction of both playing Batman villains - as The Penguin in 1992 as Mr. Freeze in 1997. The It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia actor looked sharp in his glasses and black suit as he heralded the former Governor of California.  The Austrian-born action star flashed his movie star grin as he held his golden statuette while clad in a navy velvet blazer.  Cute: The It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia actor looked sharp in his glasses and black suit as he heralded the former Governor of California Lifetime achievement: The Austrian-born action star flashed his movie star grin as he held his golden statuette while clad in a navy velvet blazer Two years strong! And Arnie wasn't alone as he brought along his girlfriend Heather Milligan for the red carpet ceremony Still going strong: The former Mr. Olympia - whose divorce from Maria Shriver was finalized in December - has been romancing the 39-year-old physical therapist for two years now And Arnie wasn't alone as he brought along his girlfriend Heather Milligan for the red carpet ceremony. The former Mr. Olympia - whose divorce from Maria Shriver was finalized in December- has been romancing the 39-year-old physical therapist for two years now. Schwarzenegger will next reprise his robotic role - nicknamed 'Pops' - in Terminator: Genisys, which hits US theatres July 1. And DeVito currently stars as Frank Reynolds in the 10th season of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, which airs Wednesdays on FXX. 'It does get more difficult when you're 66 and doing this kind of action': Schwarzenegger will next reprise his robotic role - nicknamed 'Pops' - in Terminator: Genisys, which hits US theatres July 1 Two more seasons on the way! And DeVito currently stars as Frank Reynolds in the 10th season of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, which airs Wednesdays on FXX  

i don't know

The Sleeper, Around the World, and Walking the Dog are tricks performed with what?

How to Do a Sleeper With a Yo Yo: 14 Steps (with Pictures) How to Do a Sleeper With a Yo Yo Three Parts: Performing a Basic Sleeper Perfecting the Sleeper Transitioning to Advanced Tricks Community Q&A The "sleeper" is a basic yo yo trick that's used as the foundation of many more complicated tricks. In a basic sleeper, the performer throws the yo yo down towards the ground, where it stays spinning at the end of its string until the performer jerks it back into his hand. While the sleeper isn't difficult compared to many more complicated tricks, since it's a foundational skill, it's something that's important for any serious yo yo-er to master before progressing to advanced tricks. See Step 1 below to start catching some serious Zs with your yo yo! Steps Performing a Basic Sleeper 1 Grab a decent-quality yo yo. Compared to other yo yo tricks, the sleeper is fairly simple. Most basic yo yos of a reasonable level of quality should be able to perform a sleeper without any problems. However, some cheap "toy" yo yos which are poorly constructed may be almost impossible to perform a sleeper with. If you have one of these types of yo yos, consider upgrading to a higher-quality model to make it much easier to do sleepers and any other tricks that you may want to try. While certain high-end yo yo models can be expensive, most serviceable ordinary yo yos won't cost you more than $10-$20. For a stronger spin, consider buying a model with metal construction or added bearings — the extra weight gives the yo yo more momentum as it spins, making longer sleepers possible. 2 Master the gravity throw before trying a sleeper. The sleeper begins in almost exactly the same way as the basic yo yo move called the gravity throw, so it’s useful to become confident with this simple technique before trying the sleeper. Though it may sound intimidating, the gravity throw is anything but — it’s just the basic “up and down” motion that almost anyone can do with a yo yo. Though this move isn’t terribly tricky, learning the proper technique for a gravity throw will make doing a sleeper much easier. To do a gravity throw, hold the yo yo upright in your dominant hand, palm-up. Make a motion like you’re flexing your bicep, then bring your forearm back down and let the yo yo roll out of your hand. Turn your hand over to catch the yo yo as it hits the bottom of its string and bounces back up. 3 Hold the yo-yo in your hand palm-up. To do a sleeper, you'll begin exactly as you would for a gravity throw. Loop the yo yo's string loosely around the middle finger of your dominant hand. Hold it upright in your palm so that the skinny end is sitting against the flesh of your hand. Curl your fingers around it slightly to support it. Hold the yo yo out in font of you with your elbow bent and at your side. 4 Throw the yo yo down. Make a motion like you're flexing your bicep by curling your hand and forearm up towards your shoulder. For extra power, you can even lift your elbow so that it's roughly level with the floor (or even past this point). In one smooth motion, roll your forearm and hand downward and let the yo yo roll off of your fingers as you throw it at the ground. This motion should be quick and powerful, but fluid. The harder you throw the yo yo, the longer it will "sleep." Turn your hand over so that your palm is facing the floor after you throw your yo yo so that you have greater control over the string and can eventually catch the yo yo when it comes back up (this motion should come fairly naturally). Don't hold on to the yo yo too tightly — keep your grip loose throughout your throwing motion. You're trying to get the yo yo to roll off of your hand and fly directly at the ground. If you grip the yo yo tightly and release it only as you throw it down, it may fly diagonally, rather than straight down, giving your sleeper a wobbly pendulum-like motion. 5 Try to keep the yo yo upright as it spins. Unlike with a gravity throw, you won't want to yank the yo yo back up after you throw it — simply let it hit the bottom of its string. The yo yo should begin spinning smoothly and quietly at the end of the string. It should usually remain upright as it spins without much effort on your part, but if your initial throw was subpar or your string is wound too tightly, it may begin to wobble. In these cases, you may need to subtly pull the yo yo in the opposite direction to prevent it from losing its balance. 6 Give the yo yo a slight tug to have it climb back up. Congratulations — you've just done 90% of a sleeper. Now all you need to do is "wake the yo yo up" (in other words, get it to return to your hand). For most basic models, all you'll need to do is give the yo yo a small, sharp upward tug. The yo yo should "catch" the string and work its way back up toward your hand. If your yo yo doesn't seem to have enough "strength" to climb the string all the way, try throwing it harder to give it more spin. Grab it as it reaches the top of the string and you're done! Some modern yo yos (especially high-end models) sacrifice the ability to climb back into your hand for longer, smoother spinning. If you have this sort of yo yo, it may be difficult or impossible to get it back from a sleeper simply by jerking it up. Instead, you may need to use a special technique called a “bind” to generate enough friction for the yo yo to climb the string. See below for more information. Part 2 Perfecting the Sleeper 1 Hold the yo yo with proper posture. Making just a few minor changes to the way you hold your yo yo can make the difference between "so-so" sleepers that fizzle out after ten seconds and sleepers that spin for a minute or longer. For the best results, try to maintain a loose grasp on the yo yo with your middle finger, index finger, ring finger, and thumb before your throw. Curl your fingers up under the yo yo and bring your thumb around the backside to stabilize it. Keep your wrist loose before and during your throw — it should move freely, independent of your forearm. For the best sleepers, you'll also want to be sure that the string is on the outside edge of the yo yo, rather than the inside. In other words, you want the yo yo's string to wind around the top of the yo yo, rather than around the bottom. This allows the yo yo to roll smoothly out of your hand when you throw it. On the other hand, if the string winds around the yo yo backwards, the added strain can make your sleeper be somewhat "wobbly" or tilted. 2 Use strong throws. As noted above, in general, the harder you throw your yo yo at the floor, the faster and longer it will spin. For basic sleepers, you probably won't need your yo yo to spin for all that long, but when you advance to complicated tricks, you may need to be able to count on having a minute or more of solid spin time. Because of this, it's wise to get in the habit of throwing your yo yo with a good amount of force early. However, no matter how hard you throw your yo yo, you'll want to use proper technique to keep it under control — in other words, use the loose bicep-flexing throwing motion described above. As an example of what's possible with good throwing technique, expert yo yo-ers with good yo yos can achieve sleepers that spin for over 10 minutes. Some professional-grade yo yos are even advertised as being able to achieve a spin time over 30 minutes! [1] 3 “Cushion” the yo yo’s landing. You may have noticed that, occasionally, the yo yo will climb back up the string when you try to do a sleeper even if you don't jerk it up. This happens when the yo yo hits the end of its string, runs out of slack, and bounces back upwards, catching the string again. To avoid this problem, try giving the yo yo a subtle jerk before it hits the end of its string. This puts a little slack in the string, making the yo yo hit the bottom of its path with less force and reducing the chance it will bounce back up. It can be tricky to get the timing on this move perfect, so practice plenty. For the best results, you want to jerk somewhat gently just before the yo yo hits the bottom of the string, when it's about three-quarters of the way down. 4 Learn the “bind” technique for getting your yo yo back up. As mentioned above, some professional-grade yo yos are constructed in a way that deliberately sacrifices the ability for the yo yo to climb back up the string in order to make it easier to perform advanced tricks. If you have this sort of yo yo, you'll need to perform a special move called a bind to be able to get the yo yo back into your hand after a sleeper. The basic goal of this technique is to put a small loop into the string as it winds up, which creates enough friction for the yo yo to "catch" the string and start climbing up the string. To perform a bind: Start by throwing an ordinary sleeper. Use your free hand to grab the string a few inches above the spinning yo yo. Keep holding onto the string while you swing the yo yo under the fingers of your free hand and catch it on the string. This should leave you with the yo yo still spinning at the lowest point of a checkmark shape formed by the two string sections. Gently pull on the string connected to your throwing hand to pull the yo yo closer to the fingers on your free hand grabbing the doubled-up string section. When the yo yo gets too close to keep holding on, let go with your free hand. The string should catch on itself and the yo yo should climb the string back into your hand. Part 3 Transitioning to Advanced Tricks 1 Try walking the dog. As noted above, for experienced yo yo-ers, the sleeper is usually performed merely as a small part of a more complicated trick, rather than as a trick on its own. Once you've mastered the basic sleeper, you may want to try learning some of these more advanced tricks to expand your repertoire. For instance, "walking the dog" is an intermediate-level trick that involves throwing a basic sleeper and gently lowering the spinning yo yo until it just touches the floor. When it catches on the ground, the yo yo should skip or roll forward like a dog on a leash! Jerk the yo yo back into your hand to end the trick. 2 Try rocking the baby. This trick involves making a "cradle" with the string and swinging the yo yo through it like a miniature pendulum. To rock the baby: [2] Start by throwing a basic sleeper. Use your free hand to pull the string between the index finger and thumb of your throwing hand as if you're drawing a bow. This should create a large loop. Use the fingers on your free hand to spread this loop, then move your free hand downward to turn the shape vertical. The still-spinning yo yo should swing back and forth through the gap in the loop. Drop the string and jerk the yo yo back into your hand to end the trip. 3 Try an around the world. Perhaps one of the oldest, most well-known yo yo tricks in the book, the around the world involves swinging the yo yo in a large vertical circle like a Ferris wheel. To perform an around the world: Start by throwing a modified sleeper out in front of you (rather than down towards the floor) in a move called a "forward pass". With your yo yo in your hand at your side, bring your arm forward as you uncurl your wrist and allow the yo yo to roll off of your fingers. When the yo yo hits the end of its string, pull it up over your head and behind you in one fluid motion. Let the yo yo complete a single complete circle, or, if you're feeling confident, feel free to give it another "trip" around the world. When you're ready to stop, wait until the yo yo is out in front of you, then jerk it back towards your body and catch it. 4 Try a brain twister. This intimidatingly-named trick can require some serious practice, but it looks amazing when it's perfected. To perform a brain twister: [3] Begin by getting your yo yo into the same checkmark-shaped string arrangement as you would use when performing a bind. Move your free hand up and around to the other side of the throwing hand string. Pull back on the strings with your throwing hand index finger, then move your throwing hand up and fling your yo yo over the top of both hands. Let the yo yo swing out and away from you and back down underneath your hands. You can stop here or keep swinging the yo yo for additional revolutions. When you're done, drop the yo yo back into its starting position and let it climb back into your hand. With each revolution, the string will wind around your throwing hand finger. Point your finger toward the yo yo as it climbs the string to allow the string to unspool and the yo yo to climb back into your hand. Community Q&A

Yo-yo

What is the name of Snoopy's bird friend in the Peanuts comic strip?

Yo-Yo Tips and Tricks | MACkite - Where FUN Begins! ™ Yo-Yo Tips and Tricks Around the World Choosing a Yo-Yo To many people, a yo-yo is a yo-yo. There was a time not too long ago when this was largely true. But in the past few years, yo-yos have been designed with technology and physics in mind, creating different yo-yos for different skill levels and styles of play. So what makes one yo-yo different from another? There are many characteristics which set one yo-yo apart from the next. Body material (wood, plastic, rubber, aluminum), weight, axle design and material, body shape, and size all play a role in determining how a yo-yo will perform. Of these, shape and axle have the greatest effect on the yo-yo's performance. Yo-Yo Shapes Although yo-yos can come in any balanced shape, the majority of them fall into three categories: traditional, flared gap, or modified. The traditional design is the classic and most common shape for a yo-yo. It is a good all-around shape for most tricks and is good for looping. Most beginners will do well on a yo-yo with a traditional shape like the Brain. The flared gap design is basically the two halves of the traditional design reversed. Because of its extra wide string gap, it is an excellent shape for tricks which require the yo-yo to land on its own string, such as Trapeze and Split the Atom. Offstring tricks, where the yo-yo is not attached to the string, are also best performed on a flared gap yo-yo. It is a difficult shape for looping, however. Yomega Saber Wing yo-yos are an example of this shape. The modified design is the newest of the three shapes. The majority of the yo-yo's mass is distributed around the rim of the yo-yo, allowing for the longest spin, or sleep, time possible. It is also capable of being a good looper. Many modified yo-yos like Bumblebees and ProYos cover the hollow inside with a lightweight paper or plastic cap to give it the more familiar feel of a traditional yo-yo while maintaining the performance of a modified. Modified flared gap yo-yos are also gaining popularity for their long spin times during long, complex string tricks. Yo-Yo Axles There are two basic types of axle: fixed axle and transaxle. A fixed axle has the string of the yo-yo looped around the axle itself. These yo-yos sleep (spin) because the string is attached loosely enough for the axle of the spinning yo-yo to slip in the loop at the bottom of the string. The axle itself does not move. Fixed axles may be made from plastic, wood, or metals such as steel or brass. Most players prefer wood axles for performance, but metal axles for strength. Some modern yo-yos such as the Technic and ProYo have combined the best of both worlds by placing a wood sleeve over a metal axle, and many players use these for their blend of strength and performance in tournaments where fixed axles are required. Fixed axle yo-yos do not sleep as long as transaxle yo-yos, but can make better loopers. Although you can unscrew the two halves of some fixed axle yo-yos to remove string tangles, many cannot be taken apart, so make sure you know your fixed axle yo-yo can come apart before you try! String tension, or how tightly twisted the string is, is very important on fixed axle yo-yos. If the string is twisted too tightly, the yo-yo cannot spin in the loop at the end and will not sleep. But if the string is not twisted tightly enough, the yo-yo will not return. Experiment to find the perfect easy sleep - easy return string tension. A transaxle is a piece which spins on the metal axle of a yo-yo. The string is attached to this piece. The yo-yo sleeps because the transaxle spins freely. String tension is less important on transaxle yo-yos, although a loosely twisted string does catch inside the yo-yo better for easy returns. Transaxles may be either a plastic or nylon bearing, or a metal roller bearing. The nylon bearing, such as is found in the Brain and Fireball yo-yos, is inexpensive, but will not sleep as long or as smoothly as the more expensive roller bearing. Yo-yos with nylon bearings require lubrication such as a Teflon oil. Most roller bearings are sealed and require little or no lubrication. Transaxle yo-yos sleep longer than fixed axle yo-yos, but can be difficult to use in looping due to their tendency to sleep. However, transaxle yo-yos with brake pads or friction stickers, or with adjustable gaps set narrow, can be very good loopers. Yo-Yo Maintenance It's really very easy to keep your yo-yo in top spinning condition when you know how! Stringing Your Yo-Yo Depending upon the type of yo-yo, you will need to put from one to three loops around the axle of the yo-yo. You should never take a yo-yo apart to string it. This could result in the string getting caught and cut in the axle threading when you screw it back together. A yo-yo string is simply one long string folded in half and twisted up. Remove the old string by untwisting it until you can slip the yo-yo out. To put one loop on a yo-yo, untwist the new string at the bottom (the end without the knot) until you have opened up a loop large enough to slip over the yo-yo. Slip this loop over the yo-yo and into the string gap. Now allow the string to retwist while keeping tension on it to avoid kinks, and you're done! For two loops, start with one loop but continue to hold the string open after slipping it into the string gap. Give it a one-half twist and slip the loop over the yo-yo again. For three loops, give it one more half-twist and slip it over the yo-yo again. Retwist the string after you have installed the proper number of loops. Stringing Guidelines This should give you an idea how many loops to put on your yo-yo. If you're not sure, start with one loop and add more until your yo-yo both sleeps and comes back easily. All fixed axle yo-yos: One loop. Two are preferred by some for looping, and three can be used for very young children so the yo-yo doesn't sleep, making it easier to get it back to the hand. Nylon transaxle yo-yos, such as the Yomega Brain: Three loops; two for more advanced players. Roller bearing yo-yos: One or two loops. Yo-yos with an adjustable string gap: Usually one loop, sometimes two. Trimming the String and Making a Slipknot The string should be waist to navel high on the yo-yo player. If it is too long, cut it about four inches above the waist. To retie the loop, fold the top of the string over about an inch and tie a knot near the cut end of the string. Now, pull the string through the loop you just made and you will have a slipknot. String Placement Most yo-yo players wear the string on their middle finger between the first and second knuckles. This provides a good combination of leverage for powerful throws and balance for improved control during tricks. Winding the String With the exception of the Brain, the string can be difficult for beginners to wind, especially with transaxle and roller bearing yo-yos. An easy way to wind your yo-yo is to place your index finger over the string gap and wind the string once over your finger. Next wind the string twice more around, this time under your finger and inside the string gap. Now slip your finger out and finish winding your yo-yo. Oiling Your Yo-Yo Yo-yos with nylon transaxles (such as Brains and Fireballs) require lubrication when they are hard to get back to the hand or make a screeching noise. To oil your yo-yo, unscrew it and remove the transaxle. Place a drop of Teflon oil on the smooth part of the metal axle, being careful to avoid getting any on the threading of the axle (the yo-yo will not stay together if there is). Replace the transaxle and screw the yo-yo back together, being very careful not to damage it by overtightening. Roller bearing yo-yos rarely require lubrication, if at all, as some use sealed bearings (such as Bumblebees). If you do feel that your bearing yo-yo needs lubrication, place a very small drop of Teflon oil in the groove on the side of the bearing. Normal play will work the oil into the bearing. Yo-Yo Troubleshooting and Repair Like all mechanical objects, things can occasionally go wrong with yo-yos. Use this guide to quickly find and fix your problem so you can get back to practicing for that next big tournament! My Brain won't come back automatically String: Make sure the string is triple looped and tightly twisted around the transaxle so that it is not slipping. O-ring: After enough use, the o-ring will wear down from the closing of the clutch around it. If the o-ring seems flat around the edges rather than rounded, replace it. Wipe any oil off the o-ring and clutch. Clutch: The clutch may be broken so that it cannot close tightly on the o-ring. This can happen if the yo-yo hits the ground hard. My fixed axle yo-yo won't come back Twist the string so that the loop is a little tighter around the axle. Replace an old, thin string with a new, fluffy one. My Fireball/Powerspin/Raider/RBII won't come back Oil: The yo-yo needs oil to fill the air gap between the axle and transaxle. String: Check to be sure the string is looped three times on the Fireball or Powerspin. Also, old, thin strings do not work as well as new, fluffy ones. String Gap: The string gap may be too wide. Be sure your yo-yo is screwed together all the way. It is also sometimes possible to knock or pull the axle nut from its plastic housing inside the yo-yo. If this has happened, it can sometimes be fixed by firmly pushing the two yo-halves together to pop it back into place. Skill: These aren't beginner yo-yos. If you haven't yet mastered a strong throw, you may simply need to practice or start out with a Brain yo-yo to develop your skills. My yo-yo won't sleep String: Be sure the string is looped, not tied around the axle. Look for knots in the string. Untwist the string a little so the axle can spin freely within the loop at the end. Check to see if the string is tangled inside the yo-yo or screwed into the axle threading. If the string is tangled inside a non take-apart yo-yo and you use a paper clip, scissors, or other sharp or metallic object to remove it, be very careful not to scratch the axle or inside of the yo-yo as this will quickly cut through your string. String Gap: If the yo-yo axle threading has been stripped or a spacer has been lost, the yo-yo may be screwed too far together, not leaving a wide enough space for the free spinning of the bearing or string. Axle: Transaxle yo-yo: It may need to be oiled. There may be dirt on the axle. The axle may be scratched, preventing the free spinning of the transaxle or string. Brain: The transaxle may be in backwards. Put the o-ring side of the transaxle into the "smart" half of the Brain. Adjustable Gap yo-yo: The string gap may be adjusted to too narrow a setting. Widen the gap and try again. Roller bearing yo-yo: The pieces may be in the wrong order. Spacers go on both sides of the bearing, cupping around it. Small o-rings, if there are any, go on either side of the spacers. My string keeps breaking It is normal for a yo-yo string to break after six to eight hours of play (or less for more advanced players or yo-yos with wood axles), but if your string is breaking after only minutes of play and the yo-yo is a fixed axle yo-yo, the axle may be scratched. A scratched axle will buzzsaw its way through a string very rapidly. A take-apart yo-yo's string may have gotten caught in the axle threading. If a string falls off a bearing, it will be cut quickly. Check to see that you have all the parts inside the yo-yo and that they are in the correct order. If the yo-yo has an adjustable gap, the gap may have been widened past the width of the bearing. My yo-yo keeps coming apart or won't screw back together Threading: It is normal for all take-apart yo-yos to work their way apart over time and should be checked for tightness during play. Wipe any oil off the axle threading and screw the yo-yo back together until it is snug, taking care not to strip the threading or crack the plastic housing. Stripped: If the axle threading or nut is stripped, or the plastic housing around the nut is cracked, the yo-yo may not screw together or stay together. Don't use too much force when screwing your yo-yo back together and trim your string so you don't hit the ground to prevent this from happening. My yo-yo won't come apart Fixed axle: Fixed axle yo-yos like older Duncan models and most wood yo-yos are not made to come apart. Carefully remove string tangles with a paper clip, taking care not to scratch the inside of the yo-yo or the axle. Stripped/cracked: Yo-yos which have been stripped or cracked may not come apart. Don't use too much force when screwing your yo-yo back together and trim your string so you don't hit the ground to prevent this from happening. My new yo-yo has a mark/knob on the edge This is the mold mark present on many popular models of yo-yo and is perfectly normal. My cap fell off Usually this happens when the yo-yo hits the ground too hard. You can have an adult help you glue it back on with super glue. I need to take out my axle without scratching it Although it doesn't work every time, we've had good luck wrapping something like a heavy rubber band around the axle to protect it before using pliers to unscrew the axle from the yo-yo. Yo-Yo Tips and images ©1998 by Yo-Yoda of Yo-Yo Universe Yo-Yo Tricks Don't know where to begin with that yo-yo? Here are some basic tricks to get you started! Sleeper This is one of the most basic, but toughest to master yo-yo tricks out there. Make sure you throw the yo-yo hard! You will need to throw the "yo" overhanded, which means you hold your hand palm up. Make a "muscle" with your arm, and put the yo-yo on your shoulder. Now, lift your elbow up to face level, and throw the yo-yo with a hard snap of your wrist. This should provide you with ample sleep time to complete other yo-yo tricks. NOTE: If you are using the Yomega X-Brain, or classic Brain, you may need to throw the yo-yo even harder: this way, the centrifugal clutch will be disengaged, and the yo-yo can sleep. Forward Pass The forward pass is a valuable trick to know, because it can help you to learn looping as you progress to advanced yoing maneuvers. In order to forward pass, hold the yo-yo by your waist. Now, with the top of your hand facing the same way you are looking, you must do two things at once: drop the yo-yo, and swing your arm outward. NOTE: Make sure to swing your arm from the shoulder. It needs to be a "sweeping" motion, which utilizes your whole arm. Also, avoid moving your hand toward your face: the yo is attached to your hand, and that's where it's coming back! Walk the Dog For this trick, you need to throw a hard sleeper. Throw the sleeper, and very gently, touch the yo-yo to the ground. The "yo" will then roll across the floor, and you are walking the dog! NOTE: Don't set the yo-yo on the ground too hard, or it will jump back up to your hand. Around the World You will need to throw a hard forward pass in order to successfully complete an around the world. Throw the forward pass, and let it sleep at the end of the string, as it swings around your body. As it passes in front of you again, give the yo-yo a small tug, and the yo will return to your hand. NOTE: Make sure to look around you before you do this trick. Around the World can be dangerous, because the yo-yo is moving fast, and is covering a large area. GET MACKITE SPECIALS & NEWS

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Characterized by a numbness at the back of the neck and arms, Chinese restaurant syndrome is commonly attributed to what food additive?

Monosodium Glutamate Allergy Symptoms and Treatment - Ygoy Opcon eye drops PRN (according to the need) More Information on MSG Allergy Some researchers opine that what is termed MSG allergy is actually an intolerance. This is because in a food allergy, the body produces antibodies to fight proteins contained in the food. These antibodies cause allergic reactions. However, the ingestion of MSG does not cause the release of such antibodies. MSG stimulates the nerve cells just like caffeine or alcohol. This leads to an increase in histamine levels in the body, leading to allergy-like symptoms. Also, MSG is known to worsen allergies to other food items. For example, if an individual is allergic to soy, then in an item containing MSG and soy, the MSG can aggravate the patient’s allergic reaction to soy.  

MSG

Castillo Del Morro is the recreated Spanish fort that stands over top of what Disney World ride?

MSG Technical Report MSG Technical Report You're Reading a Free Preview Pages 4 to 36 are not shown in this preview. This action might not be possible to undo. Are you sure you want to continue? CANCEL We've moved you to where you read on your other device. Get the full title to continue Get the full title to continue reading from where you left off, or restart the preview. Restart preview

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Genoa, Jib, and Spinnaker are all types of what?

Using Spinnaker Sails for Cruising without the Drama! Site Guide Can Spinnaker Sails be The Cruisers' Friends? Racing skippers hoist their spinnaker sails at the first opportunity in wind strengths that would have me thinking about putting the second reef in. OK, they're normally fully crewed and we on Alacazam are usually just the two of us, but even so... We cruising types aren't looking to get to our destination before anyone else, but just to sail reasonably quickly, efficiently and in some comfort. But sailing dead downwind in light airs, nothing beats one of the conventional types of spinnaker sails. Much less stressful though, and almost as quick, is to bear up a little until the wind's not less than 20 degrees off the stern, and use an 'asymmetric' or 'cruising spinnaker'. Gennaker, cruising chute, asymmetric or multi-purpose spinnaker, essentially they're all the same thing, although I have heard the asymmetric spinnaker sail described as 'a cruising chute on steroids'... The Difference Between Asymmetrics and Conventional Spinnakers One difference is the spinnaker pole; conventional spinnakers have them and asymmetric spinnakers don't. It's the pole that enables conventional 'symmetric' spinnakers to be squared off and set directly across the airflow, enabling them to pull the boat directly downwind. In the absence of a pole, asymmetric spinnaker sails have a tackline (rather than the 'guy' of a conventional spinnaker) which is lead back to the cockpit through a block at the stemhead. This means that the sail can be set to one side of the boat or the other, but not equally either side of the boats centreline. Consequently the luff and leech are different lengths on an asymmetric - the luff being the longer - which is why they're, er, asymmetric. Finally, the asymmetric has about 25% less area than conventional spinnaker sails, but still about twice the size of a 150% genoa. Asymmetric Spinnaker Sails This is what you need when the wind moves further aft and the lightweight genoa collapses, but you should never be tempted to fly it on its own as shown here. Without being able to use a full main to blanket it, you'll have the devil of a job to get it down. Hoisted on the spinnaker halyard and controlled by a sheet lead through a block on the quarter, spinnaker-like performance can be had on all points of sail from a close-reach to a broad reach without any of the trauma. When close-reaching, the adjustable tack line is pulled down, tightening the luff and encouraging the sail to act more like a genoa. They're at the operating limit when the wind is on the quarter - any further aft and they'll be blanketed by the main and will collapse. It's very likely that the foredeck layout, and particularly the pulpit, won't have been designed with one of these sails in mind. There'll probably be nowhere ahead of the forestay you can attach a tackline block to - and if there is, the tackline will chafe against the pulpit or the bow anchor. Short Bowsprits for Asymmetrics All of these problems would be solved by a short bowsprit. At least one spar manufacturer has recognized this and has produced a very neat device that's attached to a ring on the foredeck and is restrained by a collar fixed to the stemhead fitting. And as it's removable you won't get charged for it in marinas. Set further forward the sail will be operating in clearer air, and will be more efficient as a result. Selden Mast Ltd manufacture a short aluminium bowsprit kit for asymmetrics and a much more expensive carbon fibre version . Panel Design for Asymetric and Conventional Spinnaker Sails There are three designs for asymmetric and conventional spinnaker sails; all have radially cut heads, and each has a slightly different application: Starcut: a slightly flatter cut than the next two, and optimized for reaching. (This is probably the steroid version!) Radial head: cut fuller than the starcut, and with wider shoulders. More stable downwind than the starcut, but less so closer to the wind. Tri-radial: probably the best allrounder for most of us, easily trimmed and with an operating range of 70° to 160° of the wind. If you're set on sailing dead downwind in light conditions and have a telescopic whisker pole to hand, there's no reason why you shouldn't pole out the clew and sail wing-and-wing. Alternatively, you could rig it as a conventional spinnaker as described below. Top-Down Furling Systems for Gennakers I like our gennaker - it's big, colourful and when I start to think about using it, it means we're off the wind and conditions are pleasant. On Alacazam we use a spinnaker snuffer as described below for our Gennaker - and very successful it is too. But undeniably, if there was a more convenient way of dragging the beast onto the foredeck, sorting all the snuffer lines out, hoisting it and doing the whole thing in reverse when I've finish with it - I'd go for it. Well, there is - and I definitely want one...  It's called a 'top-down' gennaker furler, and unlike standard luff-tape gennaker furlers, it allows the sail to fly free - restrained only at the tack and the head - and take up the curved luff and fullness that it was designed to. One of these makes deploying and dousing the gennaker much quicker and easier than a snuffer, as a result of which you'll find yourself getting much more use out of this great 'off-the-wind' sail. Read more about Top-Down Gennaker Furlers... Conventional Spinnaker Sails Unlike their asymmetric brothers, which are tacked to the centerline, the tack of a conventional spinnaker is attached to the end of a pole which can be squared-off to the wind. Now operating in clear air, unaffected by the mainsail, this sail will propel you dead downwind. Artwork by Andrew Simpson This performance benefit comes at the cost of complexity. Positioning the end of the pole at the correct position in space requires three control lines - a guy, a pole uphaul and a downhaul. The clew is controlled by a sheet lead through a block on the quarter. In gusty conditions - where this sail's reputation for being unmanageable is usually gained - rapid adjustment to sheet and guy is required. If allowed to get out of control, heavy rolling can develop leading in all probability to a broach. A broach to leeward is no fun, but a windward broach (putting the spinnaker pole into the water and causing a crash gybe of the boom and mainsail) can have very serious consequences indeed. Many cruising sailors view all of this with a deal of trepidation, but others - often those used to inshore racing around the cans - gleefully drag out the spinnaker bag whenever the wind gets aft of the beam. Snuffers, or Sock, for Spinnaker Sails Whilst racing crews will launch their spinnaker sails ('throw the kite up', as they may nonchalantly remark) directly from the spinnaker bag and subsequently wrestle it to the deck at the leeward mark, we cruisers should give a collective vote of the thanks for the existence of the spinnaker snuffer. Very much along the lines of a bottomless plastic bucket at the lower end of a canvas sock the whole shebang is operated from the foredeck by an endless rope. More details... Hoisting:~ Hoist the sail to its full height in the snuffer. Secure the tack line, then ease the sock line and trim the sheet. The snuffer will lift to the head as the sail fills. Dropping:~ Ease the sheet and haul on the snuffer line. Once the sail is secure in its snuffer it can be lowered to the deck. You are here: Sailboat Cruising > Sailboat Sails > Spinnaker Sails New! Comments

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Although he's still holed up at an embassy in London, Wikileaks founder Julian Assange was recently granted asylum in what country?

How to 5 Keys to Asymmetric Speed and Teamwork The reigning J/80 World Champion details how he makes his sprit boat go faster off the wind than the competition. By Kerry Klingler posted May 1st, 2002 at 12:00am Want to get more speed out of your asymmetric spinnaker and become more comfortable racing with this type of sail? It’s worth remembering, first off, that all your knowledge of speed with traditional symmetric spinnakers isn’t wasted when you get on a boat with an asymmetric. Several premises have proven to be fast under either kind of chute. At the top of your list is pulling the rig forward when sailing downwind. This alone can have a huge effect on boatspeed because it projects the spinnaker away from the mainsail into clearer wind. Ease off your backstay for starters. You might want to sight up your rig after easing it to ensure that you don’t ease it so much that you create reverse fore-and-aft bend (we call this "inverting" the rig). In most boats, you’ll find you can ease the backstay a lot before this happens. To get the rig farther forward still, use your jib halyard to pull the rig forward. After the jib or genoa comes down, the bowman hooks the halyard to the tack fitting and grinds the rig forward. You’ll be amazed how much farther forward the rig will go. On boats that use roller-furling systems on their headsail, you can’t use the jib halyard for this, but after you furl your headsail, you can tension your jib sheets, which will pull the slack out of your headstay and cant the rig forward. On my J/105, I ease the backstay to the point where it’s very slack, then tension both jib sheets. This moves the top of the rig forward and snugs up the backstay. The second important technique to maximize downwind speed (which also applies to all types of spinnakers) is to trim your sails to further increase separation between spinnaker and mainsail. The trimmer’s goal should be to ease the sheet as much as possible, allowing the spinnaker to lift and float away from the main. On boats with asymmetrics, heeling the boat to windward also helps the spinnaker separate from the main because it projects the luff to windward of the boat. This is why you see the top boats in an asymmetric fleet sailing downwind with the whole crew packed to weather. The third key is to pay attention to the trim of the spinnaker’s tack line. I often wonder why racers with symmetric chutes constantly adjust the topping lift, but then, with an asymmetric, forget to do the same with the tack line, since adjusting it has a similar effect. If the luff of an asymmetric becomes too bouncy or hard to control, tighten the tack line. This straightens the luff and moves the draft forward in the sail, and settles it down—which is why I like to have the tack line a little tight for a set or jibe because it fills more quickly. Peter McGowan It's easier to sail fast and low by easing the tack line, heeling the boat to windward, and projecting the luff of your asymmetric to windward. After we build speed and the pressure increases in the sail, we usually try easing the tack line to allow the chute to float away from the main and rotate to windward. I like to call this effect on an asymmetric "opening the luff." When the luff opens and the sail lifts away from the boat, the upper sections of the luff are more pressured, and the luff flattens in curvature slightly. This is OK, because the spinnaker has pressure in it and remains stable while rotating to windward more and separating from the mainsail. Here’s a general rule for tack-line tension: if the tack line is angled to leeward or if the luff of the sail becomes unstable, tighten the tack line; if the tack line is angled to windward and you want to try to open up the upper luff, ease the tack line. The fourth important factor in downwind speed with an asymmetric is how you trim the mainsail. The primary rule is to avoid overtrimming the main. I check the trim simply by easing the main until the luff starts to break and then bring it in until it stops breaking. Vang trim is also important: On our J/105 at the Sailing World NOOD at Larchmont, N.Y. (our first regatta in my new boat), we were slow downwind. I couldn’t figure what the problem was until we experimented with the vang tension, picking up speed by easing it more than we normally would aboard a boat with a conventional spinnaker. Weight placement is also important, and as I said before, the key move on our boat is to position the crew to windward to project the spinnaker. At the same time, we focus on our fore-and-aft weight placement. Several of the J Boats designs have very full bows and like the weight forward downwind. I’ve also found this to be fast in a lot of other boats. In Stars and Etchells, for example, you often see a crewmember in front of the shrouds. The goal in weight placement is to reduce wetted surface, but not to plow the bow too much or lose control. In a Laser, keeping your weight forward is fast, but you risk losing control and getting wet. The fifth factor that makes all the difference in speed downwind with an asymmetric is organizing your crew as a team. When sailing the J/80, each crewmember covers a key position, but on a larger boat, you can divide your crew to cover the same four areas. The first position is that of the spotter/tactician, whose job is to help with the following critical decisions: First, the spotter keeps us all informed about the position and speed of our competition. Second, he provides me, the skipper, with information about our boat’s speed and angle relative to a specific boat or group of boats. He’ll say whether we’re lower or higher in angle and whether we’re faster or slower. The spotter also helps with tactical decisions, such as how to keep our lane clear and free from any wind shadows, and how to take advantage of windshifts or different sailing angles coming into the leeward mark. The second position is that of the spinnaker trimmer, whose main job is to help the skipper sail the boat at the optimum sailing angle for the best VMG to the leeward mark. The trimmer’s goal should be to keep the sheet as eased as possible without the luff of the sail breaking. An equally important job is to constantly inform the skipper of the pressure on the sheet and in the sail. I find the trimmer’s advice most helpful when he repeatedly suggests how much or how little pressure is in the sail. He might say, for example, "I’m losing pressure on the sail, let’s try a little higher," or "I have a lot of pressure, let’s fall off a little." On bigger boats, the trimmer position becomes a team effort, with the grinder and trimmer working together to keep the sail in optimum trim while communicating with the helmsman. On asymmetric boats, being ready to jibe at any time is the key factor in attacking the racecourse. The third crew position is that of the No. 2 trimmer, whose job is to be sure that we’re ready as soon as the previous maneuver is completed. This includes the following: 1. the current spinnaker sheet must be free to run out smoothly and completely; 2. the second trimmer, on the new sheet, must be in a place from which the new sheet can be trimmed efficiently and quickly; 3. the new spinnaker sheet is clear of the bow pulpit and high up on the headstay (around 6 to 8 feet up is best), ready for a fast trim. During the jibe, the spinnaker trimmer working the old sheet stays with that sheet. His job is to make sure the clew floats to the headstay and then to be sure that the pressure is off his sheet so the new sheet can be trimmed rapidly on the new jibe. The second trimmer pulls in as fast as possible on the new sheet in an effort to refill the spinnaker quickly. Right after the spinnaker fills, he’ll normally ease it again to set the trim properly on the chosen angle for the new jibe. The fourth job is the skipper’s—to sail the boat to the fastest VMG to the leeward mark. It’s his job to assimilate the information given to him by the trimmer and the spotter. Some skippers delegate the tactical decisions to the tactician; others make those decisions for themselves. What counts is that boatspeed and VMG are maximized while at the same time, the skipper defends the boat’s position on the racecourse. In summary, we work together as a team to get the boat down the run, just as you would with a symmetric kite. The skipper looks for constant feedback from the others. The trimmer focuses on angle assessment and pressure on the sail. The second trimmer makes sure we’re always ready for the next move. And the tactician and spotter help keep the boat in the best position relative to our competition and the next mark. Here are a few other simple but important downwind tips: Before a race, get out early to develop a good idea of the conditions and wind angles upwind and downwind. When going into a windward mark, ask yourself if you’re on a lift or a header. That will help you decide which tack you want to take down the run—typically, the headed jibe. And use a hand-bearing compass to help sight the leeward mark and then determine when to jibe. Work hard to keep your air clear and avoid sailing under the fleet; in asymmetric boats it’s easy for boats behind to trap you and blanket you. And when you jibe, try to make every one of them count. Each jibe results in a loss in distance, so while you should take advantage of the shifts, don’t jibe just for the sake of jibing. In a J/105 on a 1.5-mile leg, two extra jibes will cost you at least four boat lengths. My final thought on asymmetric boatspeed and teamwork is that you shouldn’t be afraid to practice and try different things. Use your speedo or GPS to help figure out the fastest way to sail. Also, record your downwind sailing angles. Besides building on your teamwork, this kind of practice will teach you to find these angles instinctively, which is invaluable when you’re trying to adjust to, or keep track of, the windshifts downwind during a race. Tags:

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Located in Venezuela, what is the highest, uninterrupted waterfall in the world?

Top 10 Highest Waterfalls in The World Top 10 Highest Waterfalls in The World by Ejaz Khan A true spectacle, proof of nature’s forces and wonders of mother nature. A waterfall is one of the most amazing creations that nature has to offer. There are so many beautiful, greatest, biggest and most amazing extraordinary waterfalls around the world. The following is a list of top 10 Highest Waterfalls in The World. 10. Browne Falls Browne Falls is a waterfall above Doubtful Sound, Located in Fiordland National Park, New Zealand, with Height of 2,744 feet (836 m) is the world’s 10th highest waterfall. Their source is a tarn called Lake Browne which when full, overflows down the side of the mountain face 9. James Bruce Falls The highest measured waterfall in the continent of North America and ninth tallest in the world. Located in Princess Louisa Marine Provincial Park in British Columbia, Canada, it stems from a small snowfield and cascades 2,755 feet (840 m) down to Princess Louisa Inlet. 8. Pu’uka’oku Falls Pu’uka’oku Falls is a waterfall in Hawaii, the highest in the United States and eighth in the world. It consists of several jumps. In total, the waterfall measuring 2,756 feet (840 m) high. 7. Balåifossen Located in Hordaland, Norway, Balåifossen has a total drop of 2,788 feet (850 m) and is in accordance with the World Waterfall Database therefore the second highest waterfall in Norway and Europe, and the seventh highest waterfall in the world. 6. Vinnufossen Located in east of the village of Sunndalsøra in the municipality of Sunndal in Møre og Romsdal county, Norway, Vinnufossen is the tallest waterfall in Europe and the sixth tallest in the world with height 2,822 feet (860 m). The falls are part of the river Vinnu which flows down from the Vinnufjellet mountain and it is fed from the Vinnufonna glacier. 5. Catarata Yumbilla Situated in Peru, Amazonas Region the Yumbilla Falls is the world’s fifth tallest waterfall. Although the waterfall is magnificent due to its height, the volume of water is not large. The height of falls is 2,938 feet (896 m). 4. Olo’upena Falls Located in the north-eastern part of Hawaiian Island of Molokai Oloupena Falls, is considered to be the fourth highest waterfalls in the world with height of 2,953 feet (900 m). The falls have formed on a short, seasonal stream and are falling over the edge of one of the tallest sea-side cliffs of the world, located between the Pelekunu and Wailau valleys. They have gnawed a groove in the cliff-face and can be observed only from the ocean or air. 3. Cataratas las Tres Hermanas Location: Ayacucho, Peru: This waterfall doesn’t have a particularly large drainage, but there’s no denying the falls are tall. Google Earth elevation profiles support the estimate of height as being 3000′ (914m). At number 3 in list of Highest Waterfalls in The World 2. Tugela Falls Tugela Falls is the world’s second highest waterfalls. The total drop in five free-leaping falls is 948 m (3,110 ft). They are located in the Drakensberg (Dragon’s Mountains) in the Royal Natal National Park in KwaZulu-Natal Province, Republic of South Africa. They are easily viewed after a heavy rain from the main travel road into the park, glistening from the reflection of the late afternoon sun. 1. Angel Falls Angel Falls (waterfall of the deepest place) is a waterfall in Venezuela. It is the world’s highest uninterrupted waterfall, with a height of 979 m (3,212 ft) and a plunge of 807 m (2,648 ft). The waterfall drops over the edge of the Auyantepui mountain in the Canaima National Park in the Gran Sabana region of Bolívar State.

Angel Falls

How many horizontal lines are used in a musical stave (or staff)?

Breathtaking Footage Of The World's Highest Waterfall - Digg Digg DO NOT GO CHASING IT Breathtaking Footage Of The World's Highest Waterfall 90 diggs Nature Venezuela's Santo Angel waterfall is the highest uninterrupted waterfall in the world, cascading down over 3,200 feet. And boy does it look spectacular in this drone footage.

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Dewey Decimal Classification, Universal Decimal Classification and Library of Congress Classification are three methods of coding and organizing what?

Library classification - New World Encyclopedia Library classification Next (Library of Congress) A library classification is a system of coding and organizing library materials ( books , serials, audiovisual materials, computer files, maps , manuscripts , realia) according to their subject and allocating a call number to that information resource. Similar to classification systems used in biology, bibliographic classification systems group entities that are similar together typically arranged in a hierarchical tree structure (assuming none-faceted system). Library classification forms part of the field of library and information science. It goes hand in hand with library (descriptive) cataloging under the rubric of cataloging and classification, sometimes grouped together as technical services. The library professional who engages in the process of cataloging and classifying library materials is called a cataloger or catalog librarian. Library classification systems are one of the two tools used to facilitate subject access. The other are alphabetical indexing languages such as Thesaurui and Subject Headings systems. Contents In the United States, academic libraries generally use the Library of Congress classification system and public and school libraries use the Dewey Decimal Classification System. Overview Classification of a piece of work consists of two steps. Firstly the 'aboutness' of the material is ascertained. Next, a call number based on the classification system will be assigned to the work using the notation of the system. It is important to note that unlike subject heading or Thesaurui where multiple terms can be assigned to the same work, in classification systems, each work can only be placed in one class. This is true also for faceted (see later) classification systems due to the enforcement of a citation order. Most classification systems like DDC and Library of Congress classification, also add a "cutter number" to each work which adds a code for the author of the work. Classification systems in libraries generally play two roles. Firstly, they facilitate subject access by allowing the user to find out what works or documents the library has on a certain subject. Secondly, they provide a known location for the information source to be located (e.g where it is shelved). Until the nineteenth century, most libraries had closed stacks, so the library classification only served to organize the subject catalog . In the twentieth century, libraries opened their stacks to the public and started to shelve the library material itself according to some library classification to simplify subject browsing. Some classification systems are more suitable for aiding subject access, rather than for shelf location. For example, UDC which uses a complicated notation including plus, colons are more difficult to use for the purpose of shelf arrangement but are more expressive compared to DDC in terms of showing relationships between subjects. Similarly faceted classification schemes are more difficult to use for shelf arrangement, unless the user has knowledge of the citation order. Depending on the size of the library collection, some libraries might use classification systems solely for one purpose or the other. In extreme cases a public library with a small collection might just use a classification system for location of resources but might not use a complicated subject classification system. Instead all resources might just be put into a couple of wide classes (Travel, Crime, Magazines etc). This is known as a "mark and park" classification method. In the United States, academic libraries generally use Library of Congress classification system and public and school libraries use Dewey Decimal Classification System. Types There are many standard systems of library classification in use, and many more have been proposed over the years. However in general, Classification systems can be divided into three types depending on how they are used. Universal schemes covering all subjects. Examples include Dewey Decimal Classification and Library of Congress Classification Specific classification schemes. Examples includes Iconclass, British classification of Music National schemes specially created for certain countries. Example is SAB. In terms of functionality, classification systems are often described as enumerative: produce an alphabetical list of subject headings, assign numbers to each heading in alphabetical order hierarchical: divides subjects hierarchically, from most general to most specific faceted or analytico-synthetic: divides subjects into mutually exclusive orthogonal facets There are few completely enumerative systems or faceted systems, most systems are a blend but favouring one type or the other. The most common classification systems, LCC and DDC, are essentially enumerative, though with some hierarchical and faceted elements (more so for DDC), especially at the broadest and most general level. The first true faceted system was the Colon classification of S. R. Ranganathan. Specific classification systems used in English-speaking world Bliss bibliographic classification (BC) Universal Decimal Classification Brinkler classification Newer classification systems tend to use the principle of synthesis (combining codes from different lists to represent the different attributes of a work) heavily, which is comparatively lacking in LC or DDC. Comparing Classification Systems As a result of differences in Notation, history, use of enumeration, hierarchy , facets, classification systems can differ in the following ways Type of Notation - Notation can be pure (consisting of only numerals for example) or mixed (consisting of both alphabets and numerals or other symbols). Expressiveness - This is the degree in which the notation can express relationship between concepts or structure. Whether they support mnemonics - For example the number 44 in DDC notation usually means it concerns some aspect of France. For example 598.0944 concerns "Birds in France." The 09 signifies country code, and 44 represents France. Hospitality - The degree in which the system is able to accommodates new subjects Brevity - Length of the notation to express the same concept Speed of updates and degree of support - The best classification systems are constantly being reviewed and improved. Consistency Library of Congress Classification System Library of Congress reading room The Library of Congress Classification (LCC) is a system of library classification developed by the Library of Congress . It is used by most research and academic libraries in the U.S. and several other countries—most public libraries and small academic libraries continue to use the Dewey Decimal Classification (DDC). It is not to be confused with the Library of Congress Subject Headings or Library of Congress Control Number. The classification was originally developed by Herbert Putnam with the advice of Charles Ammi Cutter in 1897 before he assumed the librarianship of Congress. It was influenced by Cutter Expansive Classification, DDC, and was designed for the use by the Library of Congress. The new system replaced a fixed location system developed by Thomas Jefferson . By the time of Putnam's departure from his post in 1939 all the classes except K (Law) and parts of B (Philosophy and Religion) were well developed. It has been criticized as lacking a sound theoretical basis; many of the classification decisions were driven by the particular practical needs of that library, rather than considerations of epistemological elegance. Although it divides subjects into broad categories, it is essentially enumerative in nature. It provides a guide to the books actually in the library, not a classification of the world. The National Library of Medicine classification system (NLM) uses unused letters W and QS-QZ. Some libraries use NLM in conjunction with LCC, eschewing LCC's R (Medicine). The system Bibliography, Library Science, and General Information Resources Library of Congress Subject Headings The Library of Congress Subject Headings (LCSH) comprise a thesaurus (in the information technology sense) of subject headings, maintained by the United States Library of Congress , for use in bibliographic records. LC Subject Headings are an integral part of bibliographic control, which is the function by which libraries collect, organize and disseminate documents. LCSHs are applied to every item within a library’s collection, and facilitate a user’s access to items in the catalogue that pertain to similar subject matter. If users could only locate items by ‘title’ or other descriptive fields, such as ‘author’ or ‘publisher’, they would have to expend an enormous amount of time searching for items of related subject matter, and undoubtedly miss locating many items because of the ineffective and inefficient search capability. An art and science Subject heading classification is a human and intellectual endeavor, where trained professionals apply topic descriptions to items in their collections. Naturally, every library may choose to categorize the subject matter of their items differently, without a uniform agreed upon standard. The widespread use and acceptance of the Library of Congress Subject Headings facilitates the uniform access and retrieval of items in any library in the world using the same search strategy and LCSH thesaurus , if the correct headings have been applied to the item by the library. Thusly, LCSH decisions involve a great amount of debate and even controversy in the library community. Despite LCSH's wide-ranging and comprehensive scope, there are libraries where the use of LCSH is not ideal or effective. To deal with these types of collections and user communities, other subject headings may be required. The United States National Library of Medicine developed Medical Subject Headings (MeSH) to use on its many health science databases and collection. Many university libraries may apply both LCSH and MeSH headings to items. In Canada, the National Library of Canada worked with LCSH representatives to create a complementary set of Canadian Subject Headings (CSH) to access and express the topic content of documents on Canada and Canadian topics. LCSH policy issues Historically, issues have revolved around the terms employed to describe racial or ethnic groups. Notable has been the terms used to describe African-Americans . Until the 1990s, the LCSH administrators had a strict policy of not changing terms for a subject category. This was enforced to tighten and eliminate the duplication or confusion that might arise if subject headings were changed. Therefore, one term to describe African-American topics in LCSH was ‘Afro-American’ long after that term lost currency and acceptance in the population. LCSH decided to allow some alteration of terms in 1996 to better reflect the needs and access of library users. Nevertheless, many common terms, or ‘natural language’ terms are not used in LCSH, and may in effect limit the ability for users to locate items. There is a vibrant, interesting and growing tradition of research in Library and Information Science faculties about the cultural and gender biases that affect the terms used in LCSH, which in turn may limit or deprive library users access to information stored and disseminated in collections. A notable American Library Science scholar on this subject is Sanford Berman. Using LCSH The Subject Headings are published in large red volumes (currently five), which are typically displayed in the reference sections of research libraries. They may also be searched online in the Library of Congress Classification Web</ref> Library of Congress Classification Web , Library of Congress. Retrieved April 4, 2008.</ref> a subscription service, or free of charge at Library of Congress Authorities [1] The Library of Congress issues weekly updates. Once a library user has found the right subject heading they are an excellent resource for finding relevant material in your library catalogue. Increasingly the use of hyperlinked , web-based Online Public Access Catalogues, or OPACs, allow users to hyperlink to a list of similar items displayed by LCSH once one item of interest is located. However, because LCSH are not necessarily expressed in natural language, many users may chose to search OPACs by keywords. Moreover, users unfamiliar with OPAC searching and LCSH, may incorrectly assume their library has no items on their desired topic, if they chose to search by ‘subject’ field, and the terms they entered do not strictly conform to a LCSH. For example ‘body temperature regulation’ is used in place of ‘thermoregulation’. Thus the easiest way to find and use LCSH is to start with a ‘keyword’ search and then look at the Subject Headings of a relevant item to locate other related material. Conclusion Despite their limitations, LCSH are widely used in library catalogs in North America and around the world. They should not be confused with the Library of Congress Classification, which does not attempt to evaluate the subject content of items, but rather broadly categorizes the item in a subject hierarchy. Many libraries, especially public and school libraries will use the Dewey Decimal Classification system for organizing collections, but will employ LCSH for accessing material by topic. Dewey Decimal Classification System The Dewey Decimal Classification (DDC, also called the Dewey Decimal System) is a proprietary system of library classification developed by Melvil Dewey in 1876, and has since then been greatly modified and expanded through 22 major revisions, the most recent in 2004. How it works The DDC attempts to organize all knowledge into ten main classes. The ten main classes are then further subdivided. Each main class has ten divisions, and each division has ten sections. Hence the system can be summarized in 10 main classes, 100 divisions and 1,000 sections. DDC's advantage in choosing decimals for its categories allows it to be both purely numerical and infinitely hierarchical. It also uses some aspects of a faceted classification scheme, combining elements from different parts of the structure to construct a number representing the subject content (often combining two subject elements with linking numbers and geographical and temporal elements) and form of an item rather than drawing upon a list containing each class and its meaning. Except for general works and fiction , works are classified principally by subject, with extensions for subject relationships, place, time or type of material, producing classification numbers of not less than three digits but otherwise of indeterminate length with a decimal point before the fourth digit, where present (e.g. 330 for economics + 9 for geographic treatment + 4 for Europe = 330.94 European economy; 973 for United States + 05 form division for periodicals = 973.05, periodicals concerning the United States generally). Books are placed on the shelf in increasing numerical order; the whole number to the left of the decimal is in counting order, while the digits to the right of the decimal are compared one digit at a time, with a blank coming before zero. (Example: 050, 220, 330.973, 331 etc.) When two books have the same subject, and therefore the same classification number, the second line of the call number, which usually has the first letter or first several letters of the author's last name (or the title if there is no identifiable author), is placed in alphabetical order. It is a common misconception that all books in the DDC are non-fiction. The DDC has a number for all books, including those that generally become their own section of fiction. If DDC rules are strictly followed, American fiction is classified in 813. Most libraries create a separate fiction section to allow shelving fiction in a more generalised fashion than Dewey provides for, or to avoid the space that would be taken up in the 800s. DDC compared to other classification systems DDC's numbers formed the basis of the more expressive but complex Universal Decimal Classification, which combines the basic Dewey numbers with selected punctuation marks (comma, colon, parentheses etc.). Besides its frequent revision, DDC's main advantage over its chief rival—the Library of Congress Classification system developed shortly afterward—is its simplicity. Thanks to the use of pure notation, a mnemonics system and a hierarchical decimal place system, it is generally easier to use for most users. DDC and UDC are also more flexible than Library of Congress Classification because of greater use of facets (via auxiliary tables) while Library of Congress Classification is almost totally enumerative. On the flip side, DDC's decimal system means that it is less hospitable to the addition of new subjects, as opposed to Library of Congress Classification which has 21 classes at the top level. Another side effect of this is that DDC notations can be very much longer compared to the equivalent class in other classification systems. Another disadvantage of DDC is that it was developed in the nineteenth century, by essentially one man, and was built on a top down approach to classify all human knowledge which made it difficult to adapt to changing fields of knowledge. In contrast, the Library of Congress Classification system was developed based mainly on the idea of literary warrant; classes were added (by individual experts in each area) only when needed for works owned by the Library of Congress. As a result, while the Library of Congress Classification system was able to incorporate changes and additions of new branches of knowledge, particularly in the fields of engineering and computer science (the greater hospitality of the Library of Congress Classification was also a factor), DDC has been criticized for being inadequate for covering those areas. As a result, most major academic libraries in the US do not use the DDC because the classification of works in those areas is not specific enough. The Library of Congress Classification system is not without problems; because each area is developed by an expert according to demands of cataloging, there is little consistency. It is also highly US-centric (more so than DDC) because of the nature of the system, and compared to DDC and UDC it has been translated into far fewer languages. Ownership and administration The Online Computer Library Center of Dublin, Ohio, acquired the trademark and any copyrights associated with the Dewey Decimal System when it bought Forest Press in 1988. OCLC maintains the classification system and publishes new editions of the system. The work of assigning a DDC number to each newly published book is performed by a division of the Library of Congress, whose recommended assignments are either accepted or rejected by the OCLC after review by an advisory board; to date all have been accepted. In September 2003, the OCLC sued the Library Hotel for trademark infringement. The settlement was that the OCLC would allow the Library Hotel to use the system in its hotel and marketing. In exchange, the Hotel would acknowledge the Center's ownership of the trademark and make a donation to a nonprofit organization promoting reading and literacy among children. Classes The system is made up of ten main classes or categories, each divided into ten secondary classes or subcategories, each having ten subdivisions of its own. For a more detailed list, see List of Dewey Decimal classes. ↑ Library of Congress Authorities , Library of Congress. Retrieved April 4, 2008. References Buchanan, Brian. Theory of Library Classification. Outlines of modern librarianship. London: C. Bingley, 1979. ISBN 0851572707 ISBN 9780851572703 Dewey, Melvil, et al. Dewey Decimal Classification and Relative Index. Albany, New York: Forest Press, a division of OCLC Online Computer Library Center, 1989. ISBN 0910608377 ISBN 9780910608374 LaMontagne, Leo E. American Library Classification: With Special Reference to the Library of Congress. Hamden, Conn: Shoe String Press, 1961. Library of Congress. Library of Congress Classification. T. Technology. Washington, D.C.: Library of Congress, Cataloging Distribution Service, 2007. ISBN 0844411647 ISBN 9780844411644 Library of Congress. Library of Congress Subject Headings. Washington: Library of Congress, 1975. Library of Congress. Subject Cataloging Manual. Classification. Washington, D.C.: Cataloging Distribution Service, Library of Congress, 1992. World Council of Churches. Library Classification. Geneva: WCC Library, 1971. Wynar, Bohdan S., Arlene G. Taylor, and Jeanne Osborn. Introduction to Cataloging and Classification. Library science text series. Littleton, Colo: Libraries Unlimited, 1980. ISBN 0872872203 ISBN 9780872872202 ISBN 0872872211 ISBN 9780872872219 External links

library materials

The 2012 Democratic National Convention kicked off this week in what US city?

Dewey Decimal classification - WikiEducator Dewey Decimal classification 4 Number Building Library Classification Librarianship involves the selection, acquisition, organization and dissemination of information and knowledge available in various forms. The information available is immense and increasing, but not necessarily usable. In order to make the information retrievable and usable, the various sources of information need to be organized in a library. The larger the number of unorganized library holdings, more difficult to locate the needed document. Librarians address this issue with the help of classification. According to Dr. Ranganathan, Library Classification is "the translation of the name of the subject of a book into preferred artificial language of ordinal numbers, which represent some features of the books other than their thought content”. In succinct, a library classification is a system of coding and organizing library materials (books, serials, audiovisual materials, computer files, maps, manuscripts, realia) according to their subject and allocating a call number to each information resource. The aim of Library Classification is to arrange the documents in the most helpful sequence. Libraries adopted different practices to organize their collections. Some shelved materials by when the items arrived in the library. Others organized their collections by size or color of the book. Few others organized by author, by title, and/or by subject. Among all the arrangements, organizing library collections according to subject found helpful to users. Subject arrangement on the shelves is more convenient to users since items on the same subject are collated together. However, this subject arrangement should be based on sound principles and established plans and systems that can be consulted by Library and Information Service professionals for intellectual organization of information. Consequently, various classification systems have been devised to serve as the reference tools for organizing information, thereby, facilitating easy access and retrieval. Classification Schemes A classification system (scheme) as an established information processing and retrieval tool divides the “universe of knowledge” into various categories and subcategories in a hierarchical manner. Each category represents a class and each subcategory a division and/or subdivision. The division of knowledge proceeds from general classes to more and more specific subdivisions. In a classification scheme each class and subdivision is assigned with a specific symbol (class number), so as to assure that documents on the same subject are always classified under that symbol. Symbols used are numbers, letters, or a combination of letters and numbers, which may vary with the classification system used. The Dewey Decimal Classification is a numeric ordering system, whereas the Colon Classification is an alphanumeric system. According to Margaret Mann, “a system for classification of books is a schedule, which maps out the field of knowledge in ways that are suitable for library purposes; main classes are followed by divisions and subdivisions of these classes; are gradation of subject is so arranged that specific subjects grow out of general subjects”. According to SR Ranganathan, classification scheme is “a scheme of classes fitted with terminology and notation”. A library classification system aids a classifier in ordering of the universe of knowledge such that books of similar subjects can be kept together on the shelves, assigning a unique shelf address (call number) to each document procured. Classification systems are designed to give a numerical, or alphanumerical notation to each item in the library. This notation is designed to indicate the subject matter of the item being classified. The first practical universal classification schemes were developed in the late-nineteenth-century as a response to the problem of organizing libraries in the context of rapidly growing knowledge and an increase in the numbers of printed books. Universal schemes aim to be both comprehensive and also to expand and contract to fit the state of knowledge at any time. The most widely used universal classification schemes are the Dewey Decimal Classification (DDC), the Colon Classification (CC) the Universal Decimal Classification (UDC) and the classification scheme devised by the Library of Congress (LCC). Dewey Decimal Classification DDC is the most widely used classification system in the world. DDC is a general knowledge organization tool that is continuously revised to keep pace with knowledge. It provides a logical system for organizing every item in a library’s collection. Melvil Dewey conceived Dewey Decimal Classification system (DDC) in 1873, which was first published in 1876. Editions and Formats Now in its 22nd edition, DDC is available in print and Web versions. Dewey is also used for other purposes, example as a browsing mechanism for resources on the Web. The DDC has been translated into more than thirty languages. Translations of the latest full and abridged editions of the DDC are completed, planned, or underway in Arabic, Chinese, French, German, Greek, Hebrew, Icelandic, Italian, Korean, Norwegian, Russian, Spanish and Vietnamese. First Edition The first edition of DDC was published anonymously in 1876 under the title "A Classification and Subject Index for Cataloguing and Arranging the Books and Pamphlets of a Library". It comprised of 42 pages, among which 11 pages were schedules and 18 pages were index. It included schedules to 1,000 divisions numbered 000–999, together with a relative index and prefatory matter. The major significance of this edition was that it was simple to work with and provided systematic arrangement of the materials in a library on the basis of subject approach. Second Edition The second, revised and greatly enlarged edition was published under Dewey’s name in 1885. The second edition entitled, “Decimal Classification and Relative Index,” appeared in 1885. This was eleven times voluminous than the first edition. It contained many changes. Since then 20 full editions and 14 abridgments have appeared. The 21st edition of the DDC and Dewey for Windows published in 1996, making it the first time print and electronic formats are published simultaneously. It displayed the continuous revitalization efforts that have kept it contemporary throughout the twentieth century. Progress in science, technology, and even thought and culture was consistently reflected within the classification. In 2002, WebDewey and Abridged WebDewey were published. DDC22 published in mid-2003, includes many new features that make the classification easier to use. DDC22 is the culmination of the work of editors, the Decimal Classification Editorial Policy Committee (EPC), and many advisors representing various fields and specific constituencies. Edition 22 reflects current thought in knowledge organization, and incorporates updates and changes identified during the use of 21st edition. Edition 22 The 22nd edition reflects improvements in terminology in geographic area, law, political parties, language, literature and historical periods. Two striking changes in Edition 22, the removal of Table 7 and the streamlining of the Manual, have been motivated by a desire to promote classifier efficiency. Table 7 is removed and replaced with direct use of notation already available in the schedules and in notation 08 from Table 1. Information easily accommodated in notes in the tables and schedules has been transferred from the Manual, and redundant information already in the schedules and tables has been eliminated from the Manual. The remaining Manual entries are revised in a consistent style to promote quick understanding and efficient use. The print version of the DDC 22 consists of the following four volumes: Volume 1 comprises of introductory matter, the manual, auxiliary tables, and lists of relocations, discontinuations and reused numbers etc. Volume 2 enumerates the 3 summaries and embeds the hierarchical notations from 000–599. Volume 3 embeds the notations 600–999 to organize knowledge related to technology, arts, literature and geography. Volume 4, the relative index lists the concepts alphabetically. WebDewey Web Dewey gives access to an enhanced version of the DDC22 database on the Web. WebDewey is part of the OCLC suite of cataloguing and metadata services. WebDewey offers easy-to-use, World Wide Web-based access to the Dewey Decimal Classification (DDC) and related information, with searching and browsing capabilities; Library of Congress Subject Headings (LCSH) intellectually and statistically mapped to Dewey numbers; and links from the mapped LCSH to the corresponding LCSH authority records. WebDewey and Abridged WebDewey, the electronic versions of the full and abridged editions, respectively, are updated frequently and contain additional index entries and mapped vocabulary. The electronic versions and supplemental Web postings are the chief sources of ongoing updates to the DDC. On OCLC’s Dewey Website , selected new numbers and changes to the DDC are posted monthly, and mappings between selected new Library of Congress Subject Headings (LCSH) and Dewey numbers are posted biweekly. Structure In DDC, basic classes are organized by disciplines or fields of study. At the broadest level, the DDC is divided into ten main classes, which together cover the entire world of knowledge. Each main class is further divided into ten divisions, and each division into ten sections (not all the numbers for the divisions and sections have been used). DDC Summaries The main structure of the DDC is presented in the DDC Summaries following the introduction. DDC22 provides three summaries, showing successively the 10 main classes (first summary), the 100 divisions (second summary), and the 1,000 sections (third summary) of the basic scheme. Each class consists of a group of related disciplines. First Summary - Ten Main Classes The first summary contains the ten main classes. The first digit in each three-digit number represents the main class. The ten main classes are: 000 Computer Science, information & general works 100 Philosophy & psychology 200 Religion 300 Social Sciences 400 Languages 500 Science 600 Technology 700 Arts & recreation 800 Literature 900 History & geography Class 000 is the most general class, and is used for works not limited to any one specific discipline, example, encyclopedias, newspapers, general periodicals. This class is also used for certain specialized disciplines that deal with knowledge and information, example, computer science, library and information science, journalism. Each of the other main classes (100-900) comprises a major discipline or group of related disciplines. Class 100 covers philosophy, paranormal phenomena, and psychology. Class 200 is devoted to religion. Both philosophy and religion deal with the ultimate nature of existence and relationships, but religion treats these topics within the context of revelation, deity, and worship. Class 300 covers the social sciences. Class 300 includes sociology, anthropology, statistics, political science, economics, law, public administration, social problems and services, education, commerce, communications, transportation, and customs. Class 400 comprises language, linguistics, and specific languages. Literature, which is arranged by language, is found in 800. Class 500 is devoted to natural sciences and mathematics. Natural sciences (500) describe and attempt to explain the world in which we live. Class 600 is technology. Technology consists of utilizing the sciences to harness the natural world and its resources for the benefits of humankind. Class 700 covers the arts: art in general, fine and decorative arts, music, and performing arts. Recreation, including sports and games, is also classed in 700. Class 800 covers literature, and includes rhetoric, prose, poetry, drama, etc. Folk literature is classed with customs in 300. Class 900 is devoted to history and geography. When a work is a story of events that have transpired or an account of existing conditions in a particular place or region, it is classed in 900. A history of a specific subject is classed with the subject. There are ten and only ten main classes in DDC. There is no change in the number ever since the publication of the first edition of the scheme. Each of the classes has ten divisions. These divisions are further divided − and then further divided. Each division becomes more specific. The more the numbers, the more specific the subject is. In this way, the Dewey classification system progresses from the general to the specific. The decimal place is used to make the number even more specific. Second Summary – Hundred Divisions Each of the main class in the First Summary is further divided into 10 divisions. Thus, the second summary contains the hundred divisions. The second digit in each three-digit number indicates the division. For example, 600 is used for general works on technology, 610 for medicine and health, 620 for engineering, 630 for agriculture. Let us take the main class 700 Fine Arts and its second summary (10 x 10) 100 divisions. Each division is also represented by three digited numbers, wherein the last digit is always a zero, which indicates the absence of a section. 700 Fine Arts 710 Civic and landscape art 720 Architecture 730 Sculpture 740 Drawing, decorative arts 750 Painting 760 Graphic arts 770 Photography 780 Music 790 Recreational and performing arts - cinema, theatre, indoor games, sports. The numbers of the divisions are to be treated as 'decimal numbers' as in the case of the main classes. We should presume that there is a dot before each number. For example, 790 should be spelt as seven, nine, zero but not as five hundred ninety. Third Summary – Thousand Sections Each of the 100 divisions is separated again into 10 sections. Thus, the third summary contains the thousand sections. Let us take the division 790 – Recreational activities in general. The section number is also a three digited one, wherein all are substantive digits. 790 Recreational activities in general 791 Entertainment – circuses, cinema, radio, television 792 Theatre 793 Indoor games, puzzles, dancing etc. 794 Indoor games of skill – chess, snooker 795 Games of change, card games 796 Ball games, athletics, walking, climbing, combat sports, ice and snow sports 797 Aquatic and air sports – boating, swimming, gliding, sky diving 798 Horsemanship and horse racing 799 Fishing, hunting, shooting. The numbers of the sections are also to be treated as ‘decimal numbers’ as in the case of main classes and divisions. Hence, the number 799 should be spelt as seven nine nine. Notation A basic principle of DDC is it is arranged by discipline and not by subject; notation used is the pure notation and structural and notational hierarchy are maintained throughout the schedules. Indo-Arabic numerals are used to represent the class numbers. The first digit in each three-digit number represents the main class. The second digit in each three-digit number indicates the division. The third digit in each three-digit number indicates the section. The DDC uses the convention that no number should have fewer than three digits; zeros are used to fill out numbers. The notation of DDC schedule is made up of three basic numbers, which represent a particular place in the schedules. The first digit indicates one of the ten main classes. The second digit represents one of the ten divisions within the class. The third digit distinguishes one of the ten sections. Most notations require further refinements, so a decimal is inserted following this three-part number to be followed by more digits representing a specific element of the topic. The notation of a class varies with the depth of the discipline. If the extension of a discipline is more, the class number will be short. If the intention is more, the class number will be long. Decimal Fractions All the decimal fractions follow a whole number preceded by a decimal point, as an indicator. For example in 10.5, read as ten point five, 5 is a decimal fraction and is preceded by a decimal point. Similarly 0.92 is read as zero point nine two or simply as decimal nine two. The decimal fractions have constant place value of the digits. If we add any digit to the right end of any decimal fraction, the place value of the already present figures does not change. For example, if a decimal fraction 52 is extended by 5 to make it 525, the original place value of the first two digits, viz., 52 remains unaltered. This is due to the fact that every digit in a decimal fraction has its fixed absolute value irrespective of the total number of digits in a decimal sum. This property is the reverse of what it is in the whole numbers. In any classification system the number or symbols used to denote subjects have only ordinal value. They do not possess any cardinal value. The digits used in DDC are also devoid of any measure or weight or power or quantity. They only indicate their sequential value, that is, which number is to come earlier and which later. In DDC, of the two subjects denoted by numbers, say 935 and 954, it never means that the later is of any more value or importance than the former or vice versa. It only indicates that on the library shelves the book bearing the class number 954 will come after that of 953 and so on. When 511 will come earlier than 512 on the shelves, it does not indicate any of less value than 512 and by the same rule, 45 will come earlier than 5 and 301 earlier than 92 on the shelves. Use of Decimal Point A decimal point or dot is inserted between the third and fourth digits of the complete number. The dot is not a decimal point in the mathematical sense, but a psychological pause to break the monotony of numerical digits and to ease the transcription and copying of the class number. Educational psychologists believe that 324.12 is more easily remembered than 32412. Hence, this dot has no function other than to reinforce memory. Relative Index The “relative” index is so called because it is claimed to show relationships of each specific topic to one or more disciplines and to other topics. It contains terms found in the schedules and tables, and synonyms for those terms; names of countries, states, provinces, major cities, and important geographic features; and some names of persons. The DDC relative index enumerates alphabetically all the main headings in the classification schedules, plus certain other specific entries not actually listed in the schedules. The classifier should consult the index, especially in cases in which the location of the desired topic, or the precise nature of its relation to other topics, is in doubt. Yet the relative index should never become a substitute for the schedules. Since the primary arrangement of knowledge is by discipline, any specific topic may appear in any number of disciplines. Various aspects of such a topic are usually brought together in the relative index. Notes Notes supply information that is not obvious in the notational hierarchy or in the heading with regard to order, structure, subordination, and other matters. Notes may appear in the record for a number or a span of numbers. Notes may also appear at the beginning of a table. Footnotes are used for instructions that apply to multiple subdivisions of a class, or to a topic within a class. Individual entries in the Manual are also considered notes. Notes in the schedules and tables generally appear in the following order: revision, former-heading, definition, number-built, standard-subdivisions-are added, variant-name, scope, including, class-here, arrange, add (including subdivisions-are-added), build, preference, discontinued, relocation, class-elsewhere, see-reference, see-also reference, see-Manual, and option notes. All these types of notes can be grouped in 3 categories: Notes that describe what is found in a class; Including notes (notes that identify topics in standing room); and Notes that describe what is found in other classes; (iv) Notes that explain changes or irregularities in the Schedules and Tables. Tables Auxiliary tables 1 through 6, found in volume 1 of DDC22, give the classifier one way to expand existing numbers in the schedules. Each number in these tables is preceded by a dash to show that it cannot stand alone as a classification number i.e., never used as a class number but attached to the class numbers (000–999) taken from the schedule. The dash should be omitted when the number is attached to a class notation. The tables in the DDC 22 are: Table 1 : Standard subdivisions Table 2 : Geographic Areas, Historical periods, Persons Table 3 : Subdivision for the Arts, for Individual Literature, for Specific Literary Forms T3A Subdivisions for Works by or about Individual Authors T3B Subdivisions for Works by or about More than One Author T3C Notation to Be Added Where Instructed in Table 3B, 700.4, 791.4, 808 -809 Table 4 : Subdivision of Individual Language and Language Families Table 5 : Ethnic and National groups Table 6 : Languages. Table numbers are given in full in the number column of the tables, and are never used alone. Except for notation from Table 1 (which may be added to any number unless there is an instruction in the schedules or tables to the contrary), notations from the tables are added only as instructed in the schedules and tables. Number building with the aid of notations from the Tables is discussed in detail in the subsequent chapters. Number Building

i don't know

What Portuguese explorer is credited as being the first to circumnavigate the world, when his expedition returned to Spain on Sept. 6, 1522 (although he died a year and a half earlier)?

First Man to Go Around the Globe - Google Groups First Man to Go Around the Globe Showing 1-69 of 69 messages From Phil. News Agency" < p...@gaia.psdn.org > Subject: pn: Historian seeks help in tracing roots of Cebuano who circled      Cebu City, Oct. 21 (PNA) - Former Education Secretary Alejandro Roces has asked Cebu historians to help him uncover the ethnic origins of the man who first circled the world.      Roces, a renowed historian, has contended that it was not Ferdinand Magellan who firt circled the globe but a slave the Portuguese explorer met in Malacca and brought with him in his voyage.      From Italian Chronicler Antonio Pigafetta's writings, Roces claimed, the slave which Magellan named Enrique might be a Cebuano.      He urged the Cebu Historical Association to petition the Manila Historical Association to study the facts related to the issue and decide if these have merit.      The former education secretary held a press conference at the CAP Cebu, Art Center Sunday afternoon to answer questions from local historians concerning the issue.       At the same time, he presented to the museum a narrative account by Pigafetta of the first circumnavigation of the world.      The two volumes consist of the original facsimile in the Beinecke rare book and manuscript library of Yale University in French and an English translation by R.A. Skelton.      Roces said one way of determining whether Enrique was Cebuano is to study the languages, not only of the Philippines, but also of the neighboring countries such as Malaysia.      In studying Pigafetta's writings, Roces said he came across words used by Enrique  that exist in the Cebuano language.      Enrique was said to have been able to communicate with King Humabon of Cebu.      The Filipinos owe it to themselves to correct the inaccuracy, he said.(PNA) RGC/EB/ad Enrique was also the first Pilipino to come to America..Visit my Pilipino Website and learn more about this forgotten Malay. Nestor Palugod Enriquez > From Phil. News Agency" < p...@gaia.psdn.org > > Subject: pn: Historian seeks help in tracing roots of Cebuano who > circled >      Cebu City, Oct. 21 (PNA) - Former Education Secretary Alejandro > Roces has asked Cebu historians to help him uncover the ethnic origins > of the man who first circled the world.   I hate to discount the achievements of our ancestors, but I don't see how it's possible for the said Cebuano to travel "around the globe." I may be missing some facts, but if Magellan left The Old World, obviously with no indigenous people from the to-be-named Philippines, then eventually landed there (and getting killed in the process), and even if his ships' crew picked up indigenous people and landed back in Europe, wouldn't the said Cebuano merely have been the "first Indigenous Filipino to travel to Europe?" What I'm saying is, doesn't it take an entire *round trip* around the world in order to qualify for a "trip around the world"? If this Cebuano got on board in the Philippines, then he would have only travelled roughly halfway around the world. The ship would have to continue on past the Atlantic and Pacific oceans once more in order for him to have a complete *round trip* around the world. So technically, the "first man to circle the world" was some person from Magellan's crew who happened to be standing in front of the boat when it arrived at port. I could be wrong on this, but Magellan himeself only made one voyage to the Philippines, right? In article <54l3lj$ 17...@useneta1.news.prodigy.com >, DNT...@prodigy.com (Nestor Enriquez) writes: > From Phil. News Agency" < p...@gaia.psdn.org > > Subject: pn: Historian seeks help in tracing roots of Cebuano who > circled >      Cebu City, Oct. 21 (PNA) - Former Education Secretary Alejandro > Roces has asked Cebu historians to help him uncover the ethnic origins > of the man who first circled the world. >      Roces, a renowed historian, has contended that it was not Ferdinand > Magellan who firt circled the globe but a slave the Portuguese explorer > met in Malacca and brought with him in his voyage. >      From Italian Chronicler Antonio Pigafetta's writings, Roces > claimed, the slave which Magellan named Enrique might be a Cebuano. >      He urged the Cebu Historical Association to petition the Manila > Historical Association to study the facts related to the issue and > decide if these have merit. >      The former education secretary held a press conference at the CAP > Cebu, Art Center Sunday afternoon to answer questions from local > historians concerning the issue. >       At the same time, he presented to the museum a narrative account > by Pigafetta of the first circumnavigation of the world. >      The two volumes consist of the original facsimile in the Beinecke > rare book and manuscript library of Yale University in French and an > English translation by R.A. Skelton. >      Roces said one way of determining whether Enrique was Cebuano is to > study the languages, not only of the Philippines, but also of the > neighboring countries such as Malaysia. >      In studying Pigafetta's writings, Roces said he came across words > used by Enrique  that exist in the Cebuano language. >      Enrique was said to have been able to communicate with King Humabon > of Cebu.         This is generally taken by historians not as proof that Enrique was Cebuano -- other documentation describes him as coming from Sumatra, now part of Indonesia -- but as proof that Cebu was part of an international trading network which shared a common "lingua franca", probably "bazaar Malay" (pesar Melayu), which was indeed spoken from Sumatra to the Philippines.  That, as well as the common "Austronesian" roots of Philippine/Malay/Indonesian languages, would account for words used that still exist in Cebuano.         In terms of knowledge about the pre-Hispanic past, it seems to me (as a non-Filipino, I hasten to note) more important for Filipinos to realize that the Philippines was very much part of an integrated Asian economic and cultural scene -- did you know there was a significant community of "Luzones" in Malacca?  and that there was regular traffic between South China and the Phils? -- than to try to prove that a Filipino was the first to circumnavigate the world which, even if it were true, would be almost a historical accident.                                                 Norman Owen >      The Filipinos owe it to themselves to correct the inaccuracy, he > said.(PNA) RGC/EB/ad > Enrique was also the first Pilipino to come to America..Visit my Pilipino > Website and learn more about this forgotten Malay. > > From Phil. News Agency" < p...@gaia.psdn.org > > Subject: pn: Historian seeks help in tracing roots of Cebuano who > circled The man who was Magellan's servant and bodyguard was definitely a brown-skinned Malay, although probably not a Cebuano or a "Filipino."   It's more likely that he was from Malacca (now in Indonesia) where Magellan previously sailed as a Portuguese sailor.  It was from the Malays in Malacca who Magellan probably heard from about islands farther north, now known as the Philippine islands.  Even if Magellan wasn't already aware of the islands farther north, his Malay servant Enrique, certainly realized he was back among his people when they landed in Philippine shores.  The fact that Enrique, his Spanish given name, understood "Cebuano" doesn't necessarily mean he was a Cebuano.   At the time, Malay (which was the dialect of the brown-skinned Malays around the Malay peninsula) was the lingua franca or trade language among the various Malay tribes.  Because of its influence, Malay came to be used as the name for all the related languages and related brown-skinned peoples.  It would not have been surprising if Enrique, understood Cebuano since Cebuano is also a related language of Malay. Even though Enrique most likely wasn't Cebuano or even a Filipino, we can still be proud that he was a Malay.  The claim that Enrique was the first to circumnavigate the world is the established fact he was from those islands and that he, and not Magellan or any of Magellan's crew, was the first to set foot ashore on Philippine soil.  As a historical note, Magellan's crew was composed of people from various nationalities.          Magellan before coming to the Philippines sailed for Portugal. He volunteered for an expedition to the Moluccas, known as Spice Islands. His ship reached Malacca and had he gone hundred more miles north he could have landed in the Philippines that he did years later coming from the opposite direction.  Sometime during his stay in Moluccas he picked up a Malay boy who came back with him to Europe. The boy was given the name Enrique and this is just another speculation of  mine that this was probably done  after the great Portuguese , King Henry , the Navigator (angilized for Enrique).  Magellan left Portugal and  persuaded  the King of Spain to finance his westward voyage The rest is history but Magellan  was killed in Mactan  Island before he could really complete the circumnavigation of the word.  Sebastian Elcano successfully steered the only remaining vessel, Victoria back to Seville, Spain. Where did Enrique fit in this historic voyage? He was aboard the ship when it left Spain and when it landed in the Philippines in 1521. At this point of  history Enrique had circled the globe.  He served as Magellan interpreter and even Pigafetta the expedition's historian did not trust him because the way he mingled with the local Filipinos. He was very friendly and spoke the dialects well with the natives.  Trade and commerce between these islands as far as Indonesia was already well established.  People from the Philippines were already sailing the region.  It is very probable that Enrique was visiting Malucca Island when Magellan first came in contact with him . When Magellan discovered the Philippines, it was also Enrique's homecoming. That  day should  be as marked as  the day when the first man went around the world  as significant as man landing in the moon. It is only fitting that the first man to accomplice the feat would come from the descendants of the ancient mariners of the Pacific. Enrique might not be First Malay to come to Europe but he I am almost sure that he is the first one to sight the Americas.  He also might not be  a Cebuano but I am sure that he died as Cebuano (he was left in Cebu by Elcano) and there are among us his great great grandchildren. >         This is generally taken by historians not as proof that Enrique was > Cebuano -- other documentation describes him as coming from Sumatra, now part > of Indonesia -- but as proof that Cebu was part of an international trading > network which shared a common "lingua franca", probably "bazaar Malay" (pesar > Melayu), which was indeed spoken from Sumatra to the Philippines.  That, as > well as the common "Austronesian" roots of Philippine/Malay/Indonesian > languages, would account for words used that still exist in Cebuano. > >         In terms of knowledge about the pre-Hispanic past, it seems to me (as a > non-Filipino, I hasten to note) more important for Filipinos to realize that > the Philippines was very much part of an integrated Asian economic and cultural > scene -- did you know there was a significant community of "Luzones" in > Malacca?  and that there was regular traffic between South China and the Phils? > -- than to try to prove that a Filipino was the first to circumnavigate the > world which, even if it were true, would be almost a historical accident. > It's possible that Enrique was from one of the islands that is now part of the Philippines, but this is unlikely since Magellan met him in Malacca, now part of Indonesia.  However, since there was already much trade and movement between the islands during that period, it's possible that Enrique was from Cebu or one of the Philippine islands who was trading or visiting relatives in Malacca.  It's true that there were communities of people from Bisayas and Luzon in that part of Indonesia who were there as traders, and even as mercenaries.  When Magellan met him, it's possible that Magellan got him interested in going back to his island home to the north by sailing around the world.  It should be noted that Magellan did not really treat Enrique as a slave but as a co-navigator and a guide.  Magellan knew that Enrique would be an extremely helpful guide.  Would Enrique, assuming he had a choice, turn down the opportunity for adventure?  Enrique was a Malay who was probably a skilled seaman like those early Malay-Polynesian voyagers who reached the shores of Africa, the distant Pacific islands, and perhaps even the American continent.  By the 15th century, the Malay-Polynesian world, at least, stretched as far as the island of Madagascar near the coast of Africa to Easter island near the coast of South America.  It's not really that important if Enrique was from one of the islands which is now part of the Philippines because he was first a Malay who considered that region of the world his home. It is just my gut feeling.  My chance of being his direct descendant is the same as any other Filipino and if you are Cebuano you probably have greater chance.  This is my blanket ancestral claim.  Enrique's value to the voyage could be measured when Magellan provided in his will that Enrique would have shares of his wealth and prizes upon his death. My other disappointment in life was when I missed being onboard the nuclear submarine (USS Triton) when she made the first circumnavigation of the world underwater by tracing the route that Magellan and Enrique took in the 15th century. I did not have all the security clearance required but the voyage was compromised anyway because a Cebuano fisher spotted the submarine periscope while she was passing Mactan. Rufino Baring from Mactan had his brief moment of fame when the submarine took his picture looking down at the periscope.  Trivia but he was featured in the National Geographic. Hector Santos 10/29/96 12:00 AM Yeah, almost everyone in Mactan and Cebu are either descendants of Lapu-Lapu or of Enrique. This is what I gather from many people who have emailed me. There is no record at all about Lapu-Lapu and Enrique after Pigafetta left Cebu. Forty some years later when Legazpi returned, no mention of them either. So go ahead everyone, stake a claim that you are a descendant of Lapu-Lapu or Enrique. No one can prove you wrong. (You can't prove you're right either, but that doesn't matter.) --- Hector Santos < hect...@ibm.net > Los Angeles Katalogo ng mga Apelyidong Pilipino - http://www.bibingka.com/names 2500 authentic Filipino family names - No Graphics, All Data, One Page         That was a very interesting story.  I wish I could trace my family's surnames, but I think I'd have to do my research in the Philippines, not over the internet.           Stephanie Domdom >It's possible that Enrique was from one of the islands that is now >part of the Philippines, but this is unlikely since Magellan met him >in Malacca, now part of Indonesia.  However, since there was already >much trade and movement between the islands during that period, it's >possible that Enrique was from Cebu or one of the Philippine islands >who was trading or visiting relatives in Malacca.  It's true that >there were communities of people from Bisayas and Luzon in that part >of Indonesia who were there as traders, and even as mercenaries.  When >Magellan met him, it's possible that Magellan got him interested in >going back to his island home to the north by sailing around the >world.  It should be noted that Magellan did not really treat Enrique >as a slave but as a co-navigator and a guide.  Magellan knew that >Enrique would be an extremely helpful guide.  Would Enrique, assuming >he had a choice, turn down the opportunity for adventure?  Enrique was >a Malay who was probably a skilled seaman like those early >Malay-Polynesian voyagers who reached the shores of Africa, the >distant Pacific islands, and perhaps even the American continent.  By >the 15th century, the Malay-Polynesian world, at least, stretched as >far as the island of Madagascar near the coast of Africa to Easter >island near the coast of South America.  It's not really that >important if Enrique was from one of the islands which is now part of >the Philippines because he was first a Malay who considered that >region of the world his home. Vigil, Dude, Malacca is now part of Malaysia not Indonesia. Anyway, I personally go with the theory that since Bahasa Malay was the common trading language that it would not be surprising that people throughout the region would speak the language. Since travel was quite common throughout the region speculation as to where Enrique "really" came from before Magellan met him. > Dude, Malacca is now part of Malaysia not Indonesia. Anyway, I personally > go with the theory that since Bahasa Malay was the common trading language > that it would not be surprising that people throughout the region would > speak the language. Since travel was quite common throughout the region > speculation as to where Enrique "really" came from before Magellan met > him. Oopps, Malacca or Melaka is part of Malaysia on the Malay peninsula.   Melaka was captured by the Portuguese in 1511.  The Dutch captured Melaka from the Portuguese in 1641.  In comparison, Magellan arrived in the Philippines, which is only a short distance away from the Indonesian islands, in 1521.  Anyway, that region of the world even prior to the arrival of the Europeans, was already a crossroads in the expanding international trade that extended from Arabia, India, the Malay archipelago, and China.  Melaka was one of the major trading centers.  The Moluccas, which is part of Indonesia, became a major part of the spice trade.  For more discussion on this subject, see the works of Philippine historian William Henry Scott. An Austronesian (Malay-Polynesian) language spoken around the Malay peninsula became the trade language of the region.  Bahasa Malay and Bahasa Indonesia, and probably some of the lowland dialects of the Philippines, were derived from that language.  Malay, however, wasn't the most widely spoken Austronesian language, even now.  But, it achieved enough influence to become the name for all the Austronesian languages of the region and its related peoples. > There really is not much evidence that Bahasa (Malay/Indonesia) was spoken > widely in the Philippines during Magellan's time.  If that were the case, then > probably many in Magellan's crew, and even Magellan himself could have conversed > with the natives.  Magellan lived many years in Malacca and in Indonesia before the > voyage.  Enrique was not able to speak to any of the peoples they encountered on > Samar or Leyte. He was able to communicate with Cebuano-speaking people though. > The Malay language spoken around the 15th century may not have been understood by the common people who had their own dialects, but it's possible that it was used extensively by traders between the islands.   At about the same period and earlier, there were already many Malays from parts of Indonesia, Malaysia, and Borneo who started migrating northward to the Philippines.  Most of the lowland Malays are probably their descendants. There is no evidence that I am aware of that Magellan understood or spoke Malay or any other related dialects.  It's also not surprising if Enrique, who apparently knew Malay, did not understand the language of people in Leyte or Samar since there were already many sub-groups and dialects of the Malayo-Polynesian (Austronesian) language family even at that time.  Even Malay, which was the regional language around the Malay peninsula, was not even the Austronesian language with the most speakers, which is true even now.  There are other Indonesian languages, I believe, like the language of Java, which have more speakers. The fact that Enrique was able to communicate with Cebuanos probably testifies more to the metropolitan and trading center status of Cebu.   Cebuano was probably understood by Malay-speakers like Enrique because of trade contacts with them. It's interesting if Enrique not only knew how to speak Cebuano but that he's also a Cebuano.  This, however, is just historical speculation. Do you know if Enrique died in Cebu or he returned to Malacca? > > So, when Magellan purchased Enrique he may have enquired as to where the > boy came from.  Upon hearing that Enrique was from the very area that he believed > the Lequios to be, Magellan would have found the perfect assistant! > >It's possible that Enrique was from one of the islands that is now >part of the Philippines, but this is unlikely since Magellan met him >in Malacca, now part of Indonesia (corrected:  Malaysia).  However, since there was already >much trade and movement between the islands during that period, it's >possible that Enrique was from Cebu or one of the Philippine islands >who was trading or visiting relatives in Malacca.  It's true that >there were communities of people from Bisayas and Luzon in that part >of Indonesia who were there as traders, and even as mercenaries.  When >Magellan met him, it's possible that Magellan got him interested in >going back to his island home to the north by sailing around the >world.  It should be noted that Magellan did not really treat Enrique >as a slave but as a co-navigator and a guide.  Magellan knew that >Enrique would be an extremely helpful guide.  Would Enrique, assuming >he had a choice, turn down the opportunity for adventure?  Enrique was >a Malay who was probably a skilled seaman like those early >Malay-Polynesian voyagers who reached the shores of Africa, the >distant Pacific islands, and perhaps even the American continent.  By >the 15th century, the Malay-Polynesian world, at least, stretched as >far as the island of Madagascar near the coast of Africa to Easter >island near the coast of South America.  It's not really that >important if Enrique was from one of the islands which is now part of >the Philippines because he was first a Malay who considered that >region of the world his home. There really is not much evidence that Bahasa (Malay/Indonesia) was spoken widely in the Philippines during Magellan's time.  If that were the case, then probably many in Magellan's crew, and even Magellan himself could have conversed with the natives.  Magellan lived many years in Malacca and in Indonesia before the voyage.  Enrique was not able to speak to any of the peoples they encountered on Samar or Leyte. He was able to communicate with Cebuano-speaking people though.   There was a Filipino community living in Malacca when Magellan bought Enrique there as a slave.  Magellan may already have had an idea of the region he wanted to explore by that time.  It was known in the works of Barbosa as the Lequios Islands, as was located somewhere north of the Moluccas.  When Magellan reached a point near the meridian of the Moluccas, he purposefully steered towards the latitudes of the the Philippines.  In a copy of Barbosa owned by Magellan, he crosses out references to the Lequios and replaces them with "Tarsis and Ofir,"  the biblical lands of gold and silver. Probably he though these fabled lands were located at these latitudes.   So, when Magellan purchased Enrique he may have enquired as to where the boy came from.  Upon hearing that Enrique was from the very area that he believed the Lequios to be, Magellan would have found the perfect assistant! Paul Kekai Manansala In article < 327992...@edsa.com >, vigil < vi...@edsa.com > wrote: >Paul Kekai Manansala wrote: >> There really is not much evidence that Bahasa (Malay/Indonesia) was spoken >> widely in the Philippines during Magellan's time.  If that were the case, then >> probably many in Magellan's crew, and even Magellan himself could have conversed >> with the natives.  Magellan lived many years in Malacca and in Indonesia before the >> voyage.  Enrique was not able to speak to any of the peoples they encountered on >> Samar or Leyte. He was able to communicate with Cebuano-speaking people though. >> >The Malay language spoken around the 15th century may not have been >understood by the common people who had their own dialects, but it's >possible that it was used extensively by traders between the islands.   Of course its possible, but I'm not aware of any evidence that this is so. Pigafetta never mentions the Malay language being spoken on the islands. >At about the same period and earlier, there were already many Malays >from parts of Indonesia, Malaysia, and Borneo who started migrating >northward to the Philippines.  Most of the lowland Malays are probably >their descendants. I don't think there is any evidence of such migrations during this period. Certainly I would not say that most lowland Malays are the results of such migrations (during the period around 1500).  Some of the rajas from Borneo had helped bring Islam to Luzon, but these contacts were likely established long before Islam came into the area.     >There is no evidence that I am aware of that Magellan understood or >spoke Malay or any other related dialects. Nor is there any evidence that the people of the Bisayas spoke Malay. It was common for seafarers to learn the languages of places the frequented. Magellan lived in the region for a long time before returning to Europe. > It's also not surprising >if Enrique, who apparently knew Malay, did not understand the language >of people in Leyte or Samar since there were already many sub-groups >and dialects of the Malayo-Polynesian (Austronesian) language family >even at that time.  Even Malay, which was the regional language around >the Malay peninsula, was not even the Austronesian language with the >most speakers, which is true even now.  There are other Indonesian >languages, I believe, like the language of Java, which have more >speakers. But why didn't the people of Leyte and Samar speak Malay?   >The fact that Enrique was able to communicate with Cebuanos probably >testifies more to the metropolitan and trading center status of Cebu.   >Cebuano was probably understood by Malay-speakers like Enrique because >of trade contacts with them. This is possible.  It is also possible that Enrique belonged to the Filipino community in Malacca under the service of the king.   > >It's interesting if Enrique not only knew how to speak Cebuano but >that he's also a Cebuano.  This, however, is just historical >speculation. It is speculation either way you look at it.  Whether Enrique only spoke Cebuano, or actually was Cebuano does not dilute the fact that the first known person to circumnavigate the world was a fellow Austronesian who could likely speak the language and who stayed on the island after Magellan left.  He sided with the Cebuanos rather than the Spanish. This is still something for Cebuanos to be proud of, regardless of Enrique's precise identity. > the first known person to > circumnavigate the world was a fellow Austronesian who could likely speak the > language and who stayed on the island after Magellan left. > Ummm... hadn't Magellan ALREADY travelled partway around the world BEFORE he hooked up with Enrique? Wouldn't that mean that he would have completed a circumnavigation BEFORE Enrique finished his own?? I guess the relevant information would be, AT WHAT POINT ON THE GLOBE did Magellan come full circle?  Certainly before Mactan. BTW, where did Magellan GO after he left the island? --         Mail Order Brides from the Philippines   "Hey, this isn't rocket science, it's only brain surgery."                --  C. Montgomery Burns >BTW, where did Magellan GO after he left the island? The last I heard he'd had inspired a fish (the lapu-lapu). ;) Larry, Magellan was killed  at Mactan. Actually, there were close to twenty Portuguese on Megallen's voyage initially and any one of a number of them could also have sailed previously for Portugal and have lived in and around the area in question. Jon Zimmermann > The last I heard he'd had inspired a fish (the lapu-lapu). ;) > Larry, Magellan was killed  at Mactan. > That's what I had heard. (I was married in Lapu-Lapu.) That's why I was puzzled to see the reference to Enrique's staying behind when Magellan "left the island."  Perhaps another island was meant. In any case, I totally fail to see how someone who travelled PART OF THE WAY with Magellan could possibly have been the FIRST to complete a full circumnavigation.  Surely Magellan went everywhere Enrique went.  More or less.  And I think there has been a statement here that getting off the ship first at Mactan is what made Enrique the first.  This would be significant only if Mactan were the beginning point and therefore the ending point of the circumnavigation process. Surely this was completed long before Mactan. That is why I would like someone who appears to know about this subject to tell us just where the circumnavigation was completed. I believe this will clear up the entire discussion. --         Mail Order Brides from the Philippines   "Hey, this isn't rocket science, it's only brain surgery."                --  C. Montgomery Burns >> the first known person to >> circumnavigate the world was a fellow Austronesian who could likely speak the >> language and who stayed on the island after Magellan left. >> >Ummm... hadn't Magellan ALREADY travelled partway around the >world BEFORE he hooked up with Enrique? >Wouldn't that mean that he would have completed a circumnavigation >BEFORE Enrique finished his own?? >I guess the relevant information would be, AT WHAT POINT ON THE >GLOBE did Magellan come full circle?  Certainly before Mactan. > The general idea is that Enrique was the first to leave a native speaking area from one direction, and then reach the same native speaking region coming from the other direction. When he called out to the ship off Limasawa, and they understood him, is seen as marking the first circumnavigation.   Technically, Magellan did not circumnavigate the globe, although El Cano and some other crew members did. There are some who have suggested that Magellan may have visited the Philippines *before* undertaking the circumnavigation but the evidence is very flimsy. Unless, Enrique was born in the Philippines, Magellan may have covered as much or more of the earth's longitude than Enrique, but it was not technically in a circumnavigation.  Of course, we don't know what kind of voyaging Enrique had under his belt prior to the journey either. >BTW, where did Magellan GO after he left the island? > Magellan was killed at Mactan (if that is what you mean).  Enrique stayed on the island after siding with Lapu-lapu. Whether he journeyed after that is unknown.  A fair proportion of the crew members that made the journey with El Cano to Europe were local "Indians" from somewhere in the region. They were recruited to replace those who had died en route. It would be interesting to know whether or not any of these Indians were Filipinos.  There is a painting from the period showing El Cano returning on the last leg of the trip, with a ship filled mostly with g-string wearing "natives" having their hair bound in topknots.   >> The last I heard he'd had inspired a fish (the lapu-lapu). ;) >> Larry, Magellan was killed  at Mactan. >> >That's what I had heard. >(I was married in Lapu-Lapu.) > >That's why I was puzzled to see the reference to >Enrique's staying behind when Magellan "left >the island."  Perhaps another island was meant. > >In any case, I totally fail to see how someone who >travelled PART OF THE WAY with Magellan could >possibly have been the FIRST to complete a full >circumnavigation.  Surely Magellan went everywhere >Enrique went. No that's not true.  We don't know everywhere Enrique went. He was about 13 years when Magellan acquired him as a slave and he lived on after Magellan died.  More or less.  And I think there >has been a statement here that getting off the >ship first at Mactan is what made Enrique the >first.  This would be significant only if Mactan >were the beginning point and therefore the >ending point of the circumnavigation process. >Surely this was completed long before Mactan. >That is why I would like someone who appears >to know about this subject to tell us just where >the circumnavigation was completed. >I believe this will clear up the entire discussion. Magellan was still completely unaware of how close he was to his destination until Enrique communicated with the boatload of "natives" from Limasawa.  The journals of Pigafetta show they were generally correct in their estimation of longitude up to about 15 degrees or so (about 900 miles).  But sometimes their errors were considerably greater.  They could know their latitude correctly as long as the sky was clear, but this still did not give them any idea of how far they had to go before reaching their destination (clearly the Philippines).  It was not until Enrique was able to communicate with the people of Limasawa that Magellan knew he had reached his primary destination.   Paul Kekai Manansala > >In any case, I totally fail to see how someone who > >travelled PART OF THE WAY with Magellan could > >possibly have been the FIRST to complete a full > >circumnavigation.  Surely Magellan went everywhere > >Enrique went. More or less. > > No that's not true.  We don't know everywhere Enrique went. > He was about 13 years when Magellan acquired him as a slave > and he lived on after Magellan died. > Oh come on, I obviously meant that Magellan went everywhere Enrique went UNTIL MAGELLAN DIED. All of my logic has been based on my having been told that Magellan DID SO circumnavigate the globe BEFORE HE DIED. If you are saying now that this is not true, then I think this is a more remarkable discovery than that a Malay may have done so first. I mean, it's in all the books.  Now they are wrong? I know it wouldn't be the first time, and I am not disputing it if you have knowledge I do not have. I just want to make sure this is what you claim. > >And I think there > >has been a statement here that getting off the > >ship first at Mactan is what made Enrique the > >first.  This would be significant only if Mactan > >were the beginning point and therefore the > >ending point of the circumnavigation process. > >Surely this was completed long before Mactan. > >That is why I would like someone who appears > >to know about this subject to tell us just where > >the circumnavigation was completed. > >I believe this will clear up the entire discussion. > > Magellan was still completely unaware of how close he was > to his destination until Enrique communicated with the > boatload of "natives" from Limasawa. > All of this means nothing if Magellan did not in fact ever in his life circumnavigate the globe. If he DID, though, please tell me exactly WHERE the circumnavigation began AND ENDED (presumably you will agree that these must be the same point on the globe). Are you saying that it BEGAN IN THE PHILIPPINES? Surely not, since it is not believed that Magellan was ever there before the end of the circumnavigation. Therefore, IF he ever did circumnavigate the globe, then he did it BEFORE HE EVER ARRIVED IN THE PHILIPPINES. Quite simply, what we need is:      1. DID Magellan EVER circumnavigate the globe?      2. If so, WHERE did he begin (and end) the         circumnavigation?  (The fact that he may thereafter         have proceeded to the Philippines is irrelevant). --         Mail Order Brides from the Philippines   "Hey, this isn't rocket science, it's only brain surgery."                --  C. Montgomery Burns pmana...@csus.edu (Paul Kekai Manansala) writes: [megaclip] >Enrique was not able to speak to any of the peoples they encountered on >Samar or Leyte. He was able to communicate with Cebuano-speaking people >though.   Forgive the massive clipping but I just wanted to ask what sources you are using for this part of the story. My reading of Noone's account does not seem to reflect that Enrique was able to communicate with anybody other than the Datu and the Siamese merchant in Cebu - both classes of people who would seem more likely to be multilingual. Jon Zimmermann : BTW, where did Magellan GO after he left the island? : On May 4, 1989, Magellan embarked on a new journey where Enrique had not gone before; arriving at Venus on August 10, 1990 and was inserted into a near-polar elliptical orbit with a periapsis altitude of 294 km at 9.5. Magellan's highly successful first mapping cycle of the planet was completed in 1991. Magellan continued to gather data until October, 1994. Interviewed why he didn't bring along his Enrique during the successful trip, he remarked, "What? Filipinos would again claim and credit my houseboy as the first to do a near-polar elliptical orbit of the planet Venus. I already learned my lesson with that circumnavigation of the globe thing." - - - from the Signora Piggy's "Cornycle of the First Near-Polar Elliptical Orbit of Venus" "Insanity is doing the same things over and  over again expecting a different result."                                         --Rita Mae Brown   > I mean, it's in all the books.  Now they are wrong? > I know it wouldn't be the first time, and I am not > disputing it if you have knowledge I do not have. > I just want to make sure this is what you claim. Name one book. I've read at least six Magellan biographies and I haven't heard of this claim. (There might be one or more though and I'd like to read it.) The farthest point he reached travelling east does not match the farthest point he reached travelling west (and where he was killed). Enrique shares this same shortcoming. We can all speculate on things they did but were not recorded but that doesn't prove anything. Magellan could have done this and he could have done that. Enrique could have done this or could have done that. Why don't we consult a psychic and get it over with. --- Hector Santos < hect...@ibm.net > Los Angeles Katalogo ng mga Apelyidong Pilipino - http://www.bibingka.com/names 2500 authentic Filipino family names - No Graphics, All Data, One Page According to some historical sources including Antonio Pigafetta's writings, Enrique couldn't really understand Cebuano and couldn't be understood by the Cebuanos as well when he first set foot. What he could do, though, was to pick out some of the words that were similar between Bahasa and Bisaya like "jalan and dalan" which both mean road/street/way.  (the former is Bahasa, the latter is Bisaya^) From that, he tried to speak as slowly as possible, using so many hand-gestures, prompting the Cebuanos to do the same when speaking to him.  That way, they could understand each other to some extent. He also had to spend time with the natives, in getting immersed so that his understanding of their different grammatical affixes, vocabulary, and morphological sound shifts, so that if Magellan had to speak with the Cebuanos, Enrique wouldn't keep gesturing "could you repeat that again, please." or show a facial expression that meant "Oooops, I didn't quite get that." Bahasa and Bisaya are no doubt related, but the differences between the two are very much greater than differences between Spanish and Italian, or Spanish and Portuguese.  Vocabulary-wise, I was told by some linguist friends of mine that the Philippine language which is closest to Bahasa is Kapangpangan. Don't ask me why, but that's what many other people tell me too. Besides, Cebuano and Tagalog are so different from each other anyway. In any instant, a Tagalog won't be able to communicate with a Cebuano who knows only Cebuano, unless the two take some time out to "compare notes" and gesture to each other to "speak slowly."  One other thing... Take away all the Spanish words that Cebuano and Tagalog have (many of which are shared in both) and you've got something close to the tower of Babel.  Luckily today, many Cebuanos know English and Tagalog, and Tagalogs know English too, so communication becomes easier. I've also tried surfing the various cable channels we have on SKY Cable. I try listening to the Bahasa Indonesia and Bahasa Malaysia on their respective channels and I can't understand a thing! Even if I know Tagalog and Cebuano, it still doesn't help. Orion Perez Dumdum Villa Victoria, J. Adlawan St. KM 13, Minglanilla, Cebu PS.         Here are some examples to show how Italian, Spanish, and       Portuguese are so similar:         Portuguese:        Como esta? (formal)       KOMo eSHTA         English:                Very well, and you?         Italian:                Molto bene, e tu?         Spanish:        ?Muy bien, y tu?         Portuguese:        Muito bem, e tu?                 MUITuh BehNG, e TU           English:                How much does this cost?         Italian:                Quanto costa questo?         Portuguese:        Quanto costa esto?        KWANtu KUSHta ESHtuh                  (Ramos-Horta, BTW, is pronounced "RAMUZH-ORTuh")                 Here are some examples on how Bisaya and Tagalog are very different:         English: bird                         Bisaya:   langgam  (and langgam in Tagalog means ant)         English:          What is that?                English:                 What's your name?         Tagalog:        Ano ba yan?                Tagalog:        Anong pangalan mo?         Bisaya^:        Unsa man 'na?                Bisaya:                Unsa'y imong ngalan?         ....... It's easier to be a linguist in European languages that         belong to the same immediate family, than it is to be a linguist         in Malayan languages.                 Bahasa Indonesia and Bahasa Malaysia, BTW are the same         language, albeit written with different spelling biases. One, the         Indonesian version has Dutch-like spelling (using the OE instead of         the U, and a J where an I or Y normally is), while the other, the         Malaysian one, uses spelling rules similar to the ones used in         Tagalog. The story there is that  the people of those two countries         were using the same language, mainly because they were formerly         connected politically, and were also migrants from the original         source of the language, but were separated when they were split         between two colonizers.  Of course, today, one version has         English loan words sprinkled in it, while the other has Portuguese         and Dutch loan words.               I have an Indonesian friend whose family name is SOEROSO.         She says it's pronounced "SUROSO," while Suharto's name is spelled         "SOEHARTO" in the Indonesian way.         Here's a what-if:                 OK. Let's see. What if the Tagalog region was split between                 two colonizers. One remained under Spanish rule and influence,                 while the other was taken by the Americans.  Let's pretend that                 the Spaniards retained the Western part of the region, which is                 Bulacan, Manila, Cavite, and Rizal, while the Americans took                 Quezon and Laguna. One side, the Western side would                 continue spelling Tagalog in the Spanish way:                         Quinuha nan~g man~ga ta-o ang man~ga cagamita'n.                         Caca-in dao sila nan~g saguin~g na guinata-a'n.                 ... while the other, the Eastern side,  might spell it the way we                 spell it now...                         Kinuha ng mga tao ang mga kagamitan.                         Kakain daw sila ng saging na ginataan.                 ...Just an attempt at explaining the difference between                 Bahasa Indonesia and Bahasa Malaysia. >The Malays were once the greatest navigators and explorers.  Their >feats of exploration were unmatched until the modern era.  From their >ancestral homeland somewhere in Southeast Asia, they journeyed to >Taiwan and the Malay archipelago and beyond.           You probably mean South China, not Southeast Asia? Otherwise           pa-akyat pana-og tayo n'yan sa SEAn region.             >Today, the Filipinos, who are one of the nations of Malay descent, are >all over the world.  The journey and the spirit of adventure >continues.           About Malay and Indonesian, they are terms of colonial preference. The Dutch drove the Portuguese out of the area and called the islands within their control Indonesia or Indian islands. The people there became known as Indonesians. Came next the Brits carving for themselves a niche and called their territory Malaya after Malay the base of the hybrid trade language most commonly spoken and         understood within their sphere of influence. (Malay btw is junior to the much older Philippine tongues.) The turn of the previous century saw the emergence of a Filipino literati aching for identity and ancestry of a self-gratifying sort and the likes of Rizal began the popularization of a concept of Malay and Indonesian as racial stocks. .../Jai H Quison > Hector Santos wrote: > > > > Name one book. I've read at least six Magellan biographies and I haven't heard of this claim. (There might be one or more though and I'd > > like to read it.) The farthest point he reached travelling east does not match the farthest point he reached travelling west (and where he > > Do you swear to God that you have NEVER heard of the claim > that Magellan circumnavigated the globe? > Is that what you just said? Yes, I said I never heard of such a claim in the books I've read. I have heard such claims but only from dubious sources. I choose my books carefully, though. So I asked for a title and you did not provide one. Learn something wrong everyday, don't we. --- Hector Santos < hect...@ibm.net > Los Angeles Katalogo ng mga Apelyidong Pilipino - http://www.bibingka.com/names 2500 authentic Filipino family names - No Graphics, All Data, One Page > I was told by some linguist friends of mine that the Philippine > language which is closest to Bahasa is Kapangpangan. Don't ask > me why, but that's what many other people tell me too. ---------------- Kapampangan, Pangasinan, and Ibaloi are supposedly closely related dialects. > I've also tried surfing the various cable channels we have on SKY > Cable. I try listening to the Bahasa Indonesia and Bahasa Malaysia > on their respective channels and I can't understand a thing! > Even if I know Tagalog and Cebuano, it still doesn't help. --------------- The other reason that Bahasa words are incomprehensible to Tagalog or Cebuano speakers is because many Arabic or Islamic words have been incorporated into the Bahasa languages, just like the Philippine languages have borrowed a lot of Spanish words. It's really amazing to study the Malay-Polynesian or Austronesian languages.  I've learned so many Hawaiian words that sound similar to Philippine languages.  For example, the Hawaiian word "lahui" is same as the Tagalog "lahi."  The Hawaiian word for "niyog" is "nioc". > > Hector Santos wrote: > > > > > > Name one book. I've read at least six Magellan biographies and I haven't heard of this claim. > > Yes, I said I never heard of such a claim in the books I've read. > No, just look at the quote above. You said that "I HAVEN'T HEARD OF THIS CLAIM." Okay, so now are you clarifying what you said, and what you really mean is that you never saw this claim IN ANY OF THE MAGELLAN BIOGRAPHIES, although you were perfectly aware that it IS in other books? Is this really what you are now saying? And you believe that, in all of those biographies, not a single one of them ever ever mentioned the popular myth that Magellan circumnavigated the globe? Are you truly saying that not one of those books said that this popular myth in INCORRECT? Are you saying the every single one of those books totally ignored the FACT that many writings (even, yes, books) do make such a (false) claim? > > I have heard such claims but only from dubious sources. > What "sources?"  Were they maybe... um,... BOOKS????? --         Mail Order Brides from the Philippines   "Hey, this isn't rocket science, it's only brain surgery."                --  C. Montgomery Burns In article <55fjq9$ 85o...@dialin.csus.edu >, pmana...@csus.edu says... > Technically, Magellan did not circumnavigate the globe, although El Cano and some other crew members did... Just can't resist this one. The credit of the "first man to circumnavigate the globe." was given to Magellan since he was the leader of that expedition that left Seville, Spain in Sept 20 1519.  Following the death of Magellan in Cebu in 1521, Juan Sebastian del Cano assumed the leadership of the expedition and sailed around the world in the ship Victoria. The Victoria reached Seville, Spain in Sept 8, 1522, thus marking the the first cirmcunavigation of the world. Although Magellan did not actually complete the first circumnavigation, his skill and massive, if not ruthless determination made that achievement possible.   > pmana...@csus.edu (Paul Kekai Manansala) writes: >[megaclip] >>Enrique was not able to speak to any of the peoples they encountered on >>Samar or Leyte. He was able to communicate with Cebuano-speaking people >>though.   >Forgive the massive clipping but I just wanted to ask what sources you are >using for this part of the story. My reading of Noone's account does not >seem to reflect that Enrique was able to communicate with anybody other >than the Datu and the Siamese merchant in Cebu - both classes of people >who would seem more likely to be multilingual. >Jon Zimmermann Henrique (Enrique's Portuguese name) was not able to speak directly to the Cebuanos immediately when he got there. He needed the help of the Siamese merchant who also spoke Bahasa and Cebuano, since his work requires him to know the languages of the people he transacts business with. I also read this from Noone's book (which is based on primary accounts of the crewmen), and another book which the Historical Conservation Society distributes to members. I repeat: Cebuano and Bahasa are MUTUALLY UNINTELIGIBLE. I'm a Cebuano and I can't understand a single thing from the Bahasa Malaysia and Bahasa Indonesia channels on cable television. >> From Phil. News Agency" < p...@gaia.psdn.org > >> Subject: pn: Historian seeks help in tracing roots of Cebuano who >> circled >The man who was Magellan's servant and bodyguard was definitely a >brown-skinned Malay, although probably not a Cebuano or a "Filipino."   >It's more likely that he was from Malacca (now in Indonesia) where >Magellan previously sailed as a Portuguese sailor.  It was from the >Malays in Malacca who Magellan probably heard from about islands >farther north, now known as the Philippine islands.  Even if Magellan >wasn't already aware of the islands farther north, his Malay servant >Enrique, certainly realized he was back among his people when they >landed in Philippine shores.  The fact that Enrique, his Spanish given >name, understood "Cebuano" doesn't necessarily mean he was a Cebuano.   >At the time, Malay (which was the dialect of the brown-skinned Malays >around the Malay peninsula) was the lingua franca or trade language >among the various Malay tribes.  Because of its influence, Malay came >to be used as the name for all the related languages and related >brown-skinned peoples.  It would not have been surprising if Enrique, >understood Cebuano since Cebuano is also a related language of Malay. >Even though Enrique most likely wasn't Cebuano or even a Filipino, we >can still be proud that he was a Malay.  The claim that Enrique was >the first to circumnavigate the world is the established fact he was >from those islands and that he, and not Magellan or any of Magellan's >crew, was the first to set foot ashore on Philippine soil.  As a >historical note, Magellan's crew was composed of people from various >nationalities. According to some historical sources including Antonio Pigafetta's writings, Enrique couldn't really understand Cebuano and couldn't be understood by the Cebuanos as well when he first set foot. What he could do, though, was to pick out some of the words that were similar between Bahasa and Bisaya like "jalan and dalan" which both mean road/street/way.  (the former is Bahasa, the latter is Bisaya^) From that, he tried to speak as slowly as possible, using so many hand-gestures, prompting the Cebuanos to do the same when speaking to him.  That way, they could understand each other to some extent. He also had to spend time with the natives, in getting immersed so that his understanding of their different grammatical affixes, vocabulary, and morphological sound shifts, so that if Magellan had to speak with the Cebuanos, Enrique wouldn't keep gesturing "could you repeat that again, please." or show a facial expression that meant "Oooops, I didn't quite get that." Bahasa and Bisaya are no doubt related, but the differences between the two are very much greater than differences between Spanish and Italian, or Spanish and Portuguese.  Vocabulary-wise, I was told by some linguist friends of mine that the Philippine language which is closest to Bahasa is Kapangpangan. Don't ask me why, but that's what many other people tell me too. Besides, Cebuano and Tagalog are so different from each other anyway. In any instant, a Tagalog won't be able to communicate with a Cebuano who knows only Cebuano, unless the two take some time out to "compare notes" and gesture to each other to "speak slowly."  One other thing... Take away all the Spanish words that Cebuano and Tagalog have (many of which are shared in both) and you've got something close to the tower of Babel.  Luckily today, many Cebuanos know English and Tagalog, and Tagalogs know English too, so communication becomes easier. I've also tried surfing the various cable channels we have on SKY Cable. I try listening to the Bahasa Indonesia and Bahasa Malaysia on their respective channels and I can't understand a thing! Even if I know Tagalog and Cebuano, it still doesn't help. Orion Perez Dumdum Villa Victoria, J. Adlawan St. KM 13, Minglanilla, Cebu PS.         Here are some examples to show how Italian, Spanish, and       Portuguese are so similar:         Portuguese:        Como esta? (formal)       KOMo eSHTA         English:                Very well, and you?         Italian:                Molto bene, e tu?         Spanish:        ?Muy bien, y tu?         Portuguese:        Muito bem, e tu?                 MUITuh BehNG, e TU           English:                How much does this cost?         Italian:                Quanto costa questo?         Portuguese:        Quanto costa esto?        KWANtu KUSHta ESHtuh                  (Ramos-Horta, BTW, is pronounced "RAMUZH-ORTuh")                 Here are some examples on how Bisaya and Tagalog are very different:         English: bird                         Bisaya:   langgam  (and langgam in Tagalog means ant)         English:          What is that?                English:                 What's your name?         Tagalog:        Ano ba yan?                Tagalog:        Anong pangalan mo?         Bisaya^:        Unsa man 'na?                Bisaya:                Unsa'y imong ngalan?         ....... It's easier to be a linguist in European languages that         belong to the same immediate family, than it is to be a linguist         in Malayan languages.                 Bahasa Indonesia and Bahasa Malaysia, BTW are the same         language, albeit written with different spelling biases. One, the         Indonesian version has Dutch-like spelling (using the OE instead of         the U, and a J where an I or Y normally is), while the other, the         Malaysian one, uses spelling rules similar to the ones used in         Tagalog. The story there is that  the people of those two countries         were using the same language, mainly because they were formerly         connected politically, and were also migrants from the original         source of the language, but were separated when they were split         between two colonizers.  Of course, today, one version has         English loan words sprinkled in it, while the other has Portuguese         and Dutch loan words.               I have an Indonesian friend whose family name is SOEROSO.         She says it's pronounced "SUROSO," while Suharto's name is spelled         "SOEHARTO" in the Indonesian way.         Here's a what-if:                 OK. Let's see. What if the Tagalog region was split between                 two colonizers. One remained under Spanish rule and influence,                 while the other was taken by the Americans.  Let's pretend that                 the Spaniards retained the Western part of the region, which is                 Bulacan, Manila, Cavite, and Rizal, while the Americans took                 Quezon and Laguna. One side, the Western side would                 continue spelling Tagalog in the Spanish way:                         Quinuha nan~g man~ga ta-o ang man~ga cagamita'n.                         Caca-in dao sila nan~g saguin~g na guinata-a'n.                 ... while the other, the Eastern side,  might spell it the way we                 spell it now...                         Kinuha ng mga tao ang mga kagamitan.                         Kakain daw sila ng saging na ginataan.                 ...Just an attempt at explaining the difference between                 Bahasa Indonesia and Bahasa Malaysia. : In article <55fjq9$ 85o...@dialin.csus.edu >, pmana...@csus.edu says... : The credit of the "first man to circumnavigate the globe." was given to : Magellan since he was the leader of that expedition that left Seville, Spain ' That's not really the case.  Most of the more sophisticated books I have read don't credit Magellan with the first circumnavigation.  However, many history texts do, or they did, at least.  Call it kismet, but Enrique the Austronesian is quite commonly seen as the first to make the full circle. Paul Kekai Manansala >In article < 327992...@edsa.com >, vigil < vi...@edsa.com > wrote: >>Paul Kekai Manansala wrote: >>> There really is not much evidence that Bahasa (Malay/Indonesia) was spoken >>> widely in the Philippines during Magellan's time.  If that were the case, then >>> probably many in Magellan's crew, and even Magellan himself could have conversed >>> with the natives.  Magellan lived many years in Malacca and in Indonesia before the >>> voyage.  Enrique was not able to speak to any of the peoples they encountered on >>> Samar or Leyte. He was able to communicate with Cebuano-speaking people though. >>> >>The Malay language spoken around the 15th century may not have been >>understood by the common people who had their own dialects, but it's >>possible that it was used extensively by traders between the islands.   >Of course its possible, but I'm not aware of any evidence that this is so. >Pigafetta never mentions the Malay language being spoken on the islands. >>At about the same period and earlier, there were already many Malays >>from parts of Indonesia, Malaysia, and Borneo who started migrating >>northward to the Philippines.  Most of the lowland Malays are probably >>their descendants. >I don't think there is any evidence of such migrations during this period. >Certainly I would not say that most lowland Malays are the results of such >migrations (during the period around 1500).  Some of the rajas from Borneo >had helped bring Islam to Luzon, but these contacts were likely established >long before Islam came into the area.     >>There is no evidence that I am aware of that Magellan understood or >>spoke Malay or any other related dialects. >Nor is there any evidence that the people of the Bisayas spoke Malay. >It was common for seafarers to learn the languages of places the frequented. >Magellan lived in the region for a long time before returning to Europe. >> It's also not surprising >>if Enrique, who apparently knew Malay, did not understand the language >>of people in Leyte or Samar since there were already many sub-groups >>and dialects of the Malayo-Polynesian (Austronesian) language family >>even at that time.  Even Malay, which was the regional language around >>the Malay peninsula, was not even the Austronesian language with the >>most speakers, which is true even now.  There are other Indonesian >>languages, I believe, like the language of Java, which have more >>speakers. >But why didn't the people of Leyte and Samar speak Malay?   >>The fact that Enrique was able to communicate with Cebuanos probably >>testifies more to the metropolitan and trading center status of Cebu.   >>Cebuano was probably understood by Malay-speakers like Enrique because >>of trade contacts with them. >This is possible.  It is also possible that Enrique belonged to the Filipino >community in Malacca under the service of the king.   >> >>It's interesting if Enrique not only knew how to speak Cebuano but >>that he's also a Cebuano.  This, however, is just historical >>speculation. >It is speculation either way you look at it.  Whether Enrique only spoke Cebuano, >or actually was Cebuano does not dilute the fact that the first known person to >circumnavigate the world was a fellow Austronesian who could likely speak the >language                                           ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^         Only after staying long. But whether he spoke it when they first landed in Cebu? No way. Historical facts prove otherwise. (He encountered a Siamese trader who spoke Cebuano and Bahasa. So Magellan would speak to Henrique in Portuguese, then Henrique would speak in Bahasa to the Siamese guy, then the Siamese would speak in Cebuano to the Cebuanos) >and who stayed on the island after Magellan left.  He sided with the Cebuanos >rather than the Spanish. This is still something for Cebuanos to be proud of, regardless >of Enrique's precise identity.         For sure, he was MALAY. But it is also true that he was NOT CEBUANO. Wala hinuon siya nakasabut sa mga tawo ngadto... Mao ra sab gihapon. Lisud kaayo na nga mo-ingon ta og sugbuanon si Enrique, nga ang gi-sulti sa tanang mga libro, "Wala sila mag-sinabtanay ni Enrique, kay dili man siya sugbuanon gayud." Ug usa pa,  lahi ra kaayo sa tanan ang Bahasa og ang Bisaya nga Subbuanon. Bisag-unsaon og bali-bali, dili gayud 'na^ sila mahimog parehas.  Ako baya, sigui baya^ ko'g tan-aw sa cable TV og mga Bahasa channels... Wala gayud ko'y nakit-an! Orion Dumdum   Villa Victoria, J. Adlawan St.   Linao-Lipata boundary, > The credit of the "first man to circumnavigate the globe." was given to > Magellan since he was the leader of that expedition that left Seville, Spain > in Sept 20 1519.  Following the death of Magellan in Cebu in 1521, Juan > Sebastian del Cano assumed the leadership of the expedition and sailed around > the world in the ship Victoria. The Victoria reached Seville, Spain in Sept > 8, 1522, thus marking the the first cirmcunavigation of the world. Although > Magellan did not actually complete the first circumnavigation, his skill and > massive, if not ruthless determination made that achievement possible. >   Specifically, Hernando de Magallanes is credited as the first man to circumnavigate the globe. He did it in two trips. He was in Malacca before and by some longitudinal arithmetic he's been around the world indeed. Sebastian del Cano is the first man to circumnavigate the world in a single trip. Need we discuss it further? Eric >Specifically, Hernando de Magallanes is credited as the first man to >circumnavigate the globe. He did it in two trips. He was in Malacca before >and by some longitudinal arithmetic he's been around the world indeed. > >Sebastian del Cano is the first man to circumnavigate the world in a single >Need we discuss it further? > Sure we do! Why not? :) Let us not forget that Magellan did not just sit around when he was in Malacca. While stationed there he was in charge of an expedition to explore the Maluku islands (spice islands). Thus, by the time that he had arrived in the Philippines (to the north and WEST of the Maluku's) he had technically circumnavigated the globe in two voyages. In addition to this, the voyage under his command was able to circumnavigate the globe in one voyage (although with a rather high attrition rate). So there we have it. More goodies to talk about. Jon Zimmermann >        That was a very interesting story.  I wish I could trace my >family's surnames, but I think I'd have to do my research in the >Philippines, not over the internet.   >        Stephanie Domdom         I happen to share your family name, although we spell it differently. Mine is spelled "Dumdum" and my father's family hails from Balamban, Cebu. I hear from my grandfather, that many among you who spell it "Domdom" are also our relatives, albeit from a branch who settled in the areas of Masbate and Bicol. Others who retained the "U spelling" went to other parts of the Visayas such as Panay Island and Negros, while others went to Davao in Mindanao.  I used to think that our family name was derived from Indians ("Bumbays") who went to Balamban, but as I can see no real evidence to support that speculation, and as the word "Dumdum" exists in the Visayan languages to be the root for the word "remember," I think it is a Visayan-derived family name, and not an Aryan Indian one. Orion Perez Dumdum P.S.  An airport in Calcutta is named "Dumdum International Airport."         The Dumdum bullet (which breaks into so many pieces, thereby         causing much injury upon impact) is called such because it was         developed  in that particular part of the city of Calcutta,         India. > > I have heard such claims but only from dubious sources. > > > What "sources?"  Were they maybe... um,... BOOKS????? > No, you and the URL "source" you posted. It was a commercial site-- nothing to do with history. >Specifically, Hernando de Magallanes is credited as the first man to >circumnavigate the globe. He did it in two trips. He was in Malacca before >and by some longitudinal arithmetic he's been around the world indeed. >Sebastian del Cano is the first man to circumnavigate the world in a single >trip. >Need we discuss it further? Yes, we do. Circumnavigation means starting and ending in the same exact place, not just starting and ending in the same longitude, while going through a major circumference and travelling in the same direction. Even if we allow that Magellan did it in two stages, Mactan is still not Malacca. He had not closed the loop. This can best be illustrated by plotting his travels on a globe then erasing all the globe's features including longitudinal and lattitudinal lines. You will not see a complete circle. In fact, you can cirumnavigate the world by going halfway around the world if we allow your definition. This can be done by starting one degree south of the North Pole and going North continuing past the pole (going South now). After you pass the South Pole, you would end up the same longitude you started from although you only went a little past halfway around the world. You would not have closed the loop. Worse yet, you can make a circle around the North Pole just south of it. You would have closed the loop but not while travelling along a major circumference of the globe. By all definitions, circumnavigation means starting and ending in the same point on a sphere while travelling in the same direction along a major circumference. Close, but no cigar for Magellan. Same for Enrique. Yes, we can speculate about what was not recorded but that is not history. We can also wave the part that says "one must close the loop" and this is what most people have done for Magellan and Enrique. Sorry to be a party pooper. Katálogo ng mga Apelyidong Pilipino No graphics, all data, one page! > Specifically, Hernando de Magallanes is credited as the first man to > circumnavigate the globe. He did it in two trips. He was in Malacca before > and by some longitudinal arithmetic he's been around the world indeed. > > Need we discuss it further? > Well sure we need do: Mr. Hector Santos has sworn a solemn oath to God that he has read SIX (6) biographies of Magellan and that not only does he not believe that Magellan EVER circumnavigated the globe, he has NEVER EVER even HEARD of this assertion. Ooopss, now he says that he HAS heard of it, but only in some kind of unreliable source, and never in a BOOK, since he states that he does not believe that anyone can quote a BOOK source that mentions this assertion. And definitely the BIOGRAPHIES never ever mentioned this, not even to deny it as a myth. Now I honestly do not know what to believe. I tend to think that you are right, at one point in his life he was at one longitude, and sometime later (no matter how long he rested in between) he traveled eventually to that same longitude, passing through every other longitude along his path.  I wonder if he actually crossed his own path at some point after re-reaching the same longitude (which is what *I* would think of as a true circumnavigation), or merely described a sort of helical path? Or maybe he never did it at all. Guess we'll never know.... Mr. Santos is no help. Anyhow, there is no chance that his cabin boy made it before he did.   "Magellan had a cabin boy,    he loved him like a brother.      And every night,    they (how does this go...) one another.    ....  (ah yes...)    The cabin boy, the cabin boy,    that (something) little nipper,      he lined his (something something)      with broken glass There!  I knew I heard it from a reliable source!!!!! The Damon Knight short story. --         Mail Order Brides from the Philippines   "Hey, this isn't rocket science, it's only brain surgery."                --  C. Montgomery Burns > The credit of the "first man to circumnavigate the globe." was given to > Magellan Did you read that in a BOOK? If so, please tell us the name of a BOOK in which that assertion appears. Inquiring Hectors want to know. --         Mail Order Brides from the Philippines   "Hey, this isn't rocket science, it's only brain surgery."                --  C. Montgomery Burns Elson Trinidad < el...@westworld.com > wrote in article <01bbc161$7c141520$b53be6cd@default>... : I may be missing some facts, but if Magellan left The Old World, obviously : with no indigenous people from the to-be-named Philippines, then eventually : landed there (and getting killed in the process), and even if his ships' : crew picked up indigenous people and landed back in Europe, wouldn't the : said Cebuano merely have been the "first Indigenous Filipino to travel to : Europe?" : What I'm saying is, doesn't it take an entire *round trip* around the world : in order to qualify for a "trip around the world"? If this Cebuano got on : board in the Philippines, then he would have only travelled roughly halfway : around the world. The ship would have to continue on past the Atlantic and : Pacific oceans once more in order for him to have a complete *round trip* : around the world. So technically, the "first man to circle the world" was : some person from Magellan's crew who happened to be standing in front of : the boat when it arrived at port. : : I could be wrong on this, but Magellan himeself only made one voyage to the On the morning of September 20, 1519, after more than a year of preparation, Magellan's flottila sailed from the port of San Lucar de Barrameda, 25 miles downriver from Seville. The crew of 260 included Spaniards, Portuguese, Italians, Greeks, Germans and a MALAY slave whom Magellan had acquired in Malacca and intended to use as an interpreter. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In my grade seven Phil history class, we asked teacher: Why is Magellan given the honor as the first circumnavigator of the world, when he didn't complete the trip (he made a permanent stop at Mactan)? Teacher said he did circumnavigate the globe but he didn't do it in one trip:     March 1505, at age 25, Magellan sailed with a squadron bound for India under the command of Francisco de Almeida. They routed a Muslim fleet enabling Portugal to gain solid foothold in the Indian port of Goa--which remained in Portuguese hands for 5 centuries.    Magellan later joined an expedition of 4 ships to reconnoiter the Malayan port of Malacca. Arriving in September 1509, they were the first European vessels to reach the place. The Muslim ruler, after inviting them to a city tour, deviously directed his men to attack the tourists. Magellan suffered a wound as he held off the assailants so his comrades could scramble back to their ships. They retreated back to India.    Determined to get even, the Portuguese returned the summer of 1511 with a formidable armada of 19 ships under the command of Albuquerque, the new viceroy of India. They finally defeated the Muslims after a battle that lasted more than a month. Now a captain, Magellan again fought valiantly, and the victory put the Portuguese in a pivotal position of this busy trade routes of  fable spice islands.    Magellan volunteered soon afterward for an excursion to explore the Moluccas, the so-caArticle Unavailable That's not the case.  The first contact was when the expedition encountered a vessel off the waters of Limasawa (see Pigafetta's account), when Enrique called out to them and they understood the language.  There is no evidence that the Siamese trader ever translated for Enrique (from the primary sources). While many have been arguing over what constitutes a true circling of the globe, the primary reason for the expedition was to demonstrate that one could indeed reach the Moluccas traveling to the West from Europe rather than to the East. This would demonstrate to the satisfaction of the king and people that the earth was indeed circular (although astronomers were already quite sure of this). I'm quite confident that this was first demonstrated to the satisfaction of the whole crew when Enrique first communicated with the inhabitants of Limasawa (Cebuano speakers). Thus, he was the first to come full circle in the sense of establishing that they had indeed reached the primary destination. Paul Kekai Manansala Paul (Kekai) Manansala < sac5...@saclink2.csus.edu > wrote : : . . .  Most of the more sophisticated books I have : read don't credit Magellan with the first circumnavigation.  However, : many history texts do, or they did, at least.  Call it kismet, but Enrique : the Austronesian is quite commonly seen as the first to make the full circle. 1. Fernão de Magalhães(1480?-1521), Portuguese navigator and explorer, the first European to cross the Pacific Ocean and THE FIRST MAN TO CIRCUMNAVIGATE THE GLOBE. Although Magellan did not live to complete the voyage, HE DID CIRCUMNAVIGATE THE GLOBE BY PASSING THE EASTERNMOST POINT HE HAD REACHED ON AN EARLIER VOYAGE. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On the same "easternmost point he had reached on an earlier voyage," he acquired the ENRIQUE (the cause of all this trouble)  from Malacca.  From this side of the globe in 1511, the TWO (Magellan and Enrique) started their circumnavigation of the globe which they completed sometime on the spring of 1521. How could Enrique be the first when he was just tagging along with Magellan? They were TOGETHER. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 2. Juan Sebastián del Cano (1476? -1526), Spanish navigator, born in Guetaria. In 1519 he was made captain of the Concepción, one of the five vessels commanded by the Portuguese navigator Ferdinand Magellan during his expedition in the service of Spain. After the death of Magellan on April 27, 1521, Cano assumed command of the expedition. On September 6, 1522, he arrived in Spain on board the Victoria, becoming THE FIRST MAN TO CIRCUMANAVIGATE THE EARTH, although Magellan is usually given credit for the voyage. Number 3 is what Encarta says about Enrique. Nothing.  So, let's fill it up! And here goes: Enrique de Mallaca, THE FIRST MAN TO CIRCUMNAVIGATE THE WORLD!  Alls well, ends well. "Insanity is doing the same things over and  over again expecting a different result."                                         --Rita Mae Brown   History will never be exact science. There are a lot of interesting theories out there that are not permanent and subject to interpretation.   Past historians who said Columbus discovered America are now being challenged and rightly so.  Adverse possession  is defined as ownership to a certain property derived from holding or using the land the longest. After a while everyone thought or assumed  he  had the title  which he might really might not have earned. Hector Santos was right that both Enrique and Magellan needed to travel a couple hundred miles from their “documented” in order to earn this title.   It is a fact that both men traveled from Mallaca Island to Spain and from there sailed westward around the Americas to the Philippines. Jon was also right that there were some Portuguese who might have been  shipmates with Magellan on his eastward expedition to Malacca. Portugues mainly because King Henry the Navigator lead the eastward navigation to the Malay archepelago.  The farthest east European travelled before Magellan was Marco Polo having reached Sumatra.   Because of mutiny that include  Elcano, by the time they reached the Pacific all the ship captains were Portuguese. Between Enrique and Magellan I believe that the Malay had a better chance of having   traveled that missing miles.  This missing link  needs to be knot together.   If he is indeed a Cebuano by the virtue of the language theory brought by Kekai, then he had the clear title.  Even if he was not Sugbu it is very probable that he might have learned the language in Cebu. After all, we all agree that  Cebu was already a trading center during that time. He also might have gone back to Malacca after Magellan was killed.   He would  probably arrived there before  Elcano onboard the ship Victoria reached Spain. Elcano to his credit pick the easy East direction home from the archipelago.  The European did not solve the Westward navigation till Urdaneta was able to find the northern wind.  Enrique’s ancestors had been sailing the the entire Pacific waters  long before this point of history.  I was hoping that the expeditions from Spain, like Villabos about 20 years later, had contact with him. To give the title to anyone just because Enrique was  an obscure Malay or slave is lame and inappropriate.  History will be rewritten., Magellan  did not discover the Philippines .  Years from now simply answering who went around the world first will have to be qualified.  Our Lolo will not allow it without at least a footnotes and our children should know. Years from now the  North Pole frigid ice caps might melt due to the second global warming.  Scientist might find  under the layers of  ice body of  an ancient Eskimo boy playing and making a small circle around the north pole.  His tracks carbon would reveal that he covered all the longitude. The headline will be “The Iceman beats Enrique” Nestor Palugod Enriquez History will never be exact science. There are a lot of interesting theories out there that are not permanent and subject to interpretation.   Past historians who said Columbus discovered America are now being challenged and rightly so.  Adverse possession  is defined as ownership to a certain property derived from holding or using the land the longest. After a while everyone thought or assumed  he  had the title  which he might really might not have earned. Hector Santos was right that both Enrique and Magellan needed to travel a couple hundred miles from their “documented” travels in order to >... Most of the more sophisticated books I have > read don't credit Magellan with the first circumnavigation.  However, > many history texts do, or they did, at least.  Call it kismet, but Enrique > the Austronesian is quite commonly seen as the first to make the full circle. > So, you too have read IN BOOKS that there is a common myth that Magellan did circumnavigate the globe. It seems that Hector Santos is the only literate person on the whole globe who has never ever seen this (false) claim mentioned in a BOOK. Can you give him the name of one of these BOOKS? He really does not believe that such a BOOK exists. My showing him a Web page was met with disdain. Even after that, he re-stated his belief that no one could show him a BOOK which mentions this (false) claim. Certainly this claim is not mentioned in any of the six (6) biographies of Magellan that he has read. He says.         Mail Order Brides from the Philippines   "Hey, this isn't rocket science, it's only brain surgery."                --  C. Montgomery Burns >>... Most of the more sophisticated books I have >> read don't credit Magellan with the first circumnavigation.  However, >> many history texts do, or they did, at least.  Call it kismet, but Enrique >> the Austronesian is quite commonly seen as the first to make the full circle. >> >So, you too have read IN BOOKS that there is a common >myth that Magellan did circumnavigate the globe. >It seems that Hector Santos is the only literate person >on the whole globe who has never ever seen this (false) >claim mentioned in a BOOK. >Can you give him the name of one of these BOOKS? Yes, most of my grade school texts had this information along side that stating how Columbus was the first person to discover Amerika. Paul Kekai Manansala > > What "sources?"  Were they maybe... um,... BOOKS????? > > > > No, you and the URL "source" you posted. It was a commercial site-- nothing to do with history. So there you have it folks - this guy repeats his claim that he has NEVER heard this claim mentioned in a BOOK. It is not a misunderstanding - he really means to have us believe this. Note that we are not talking about whether the claim is TRUE or not - we are only discussing whether this claim is MENTIONED in any BOOKS.  And he says he has read SIX (6) biographies of Magellan, and has NEVER EVER seen this (false) claiom even MENTIONED in any of them, or in fact in any other BOOK.  And he claims that I cannot find any BOOK that DOES mention this (false) claim. Well, what can you expect from a guy who was KILLED IN A CAR CRASH yesterday, on "All My Children?" That must have been very traumatic. --         Mail Order Brides from the Philippines    "The legitimate powers of Government extend to     such acts only as are injurious to others."            --  Thomas Jefferson > Yes, most of my grade school texts had this information along side > that stating how Columbus was the first person to discover Amerika. > Well, of course it is not "information," but it certainly *IS* mentioned in those BOOKS, and in many other BOOKS. I guess all of us have seen it. Except Hector Santos (deceased, 11/20/96, A.M.C.). Actually, MY grade school texts also said that it was entirely possible that Leif Ericsson discovered it too, 500 years earlier, although the evidence was not conclusive, although the evidence for Columbus's discovery was unassailable.         Mail Order Brides from the Philippines    "The legitimate powers of Government extend to     such acts only as are injurious to others."            --  Thomas Jefferson >> Yes, most of my grade school texts had this information along side >> that stating how Columbus was the first person to discover Amerika. >> >Well, of course it is not "information," but it certainly >*IS* mentioned in those BOOKS, and in many other BOOKS. >I guess all of us have seen it. >Except Hector Santos (deceased, 11/20/96, A.M.C.). > >Actually, MY grade school texts also said that it was >entirely possible that Leif Ericsson discovered it too, >500 years earlier, although the evidence was not conclusive, >although the evidence for Columbus's discovery was >unassailable. No, it's all a lot of Eurocentric non-sense.  America was "discovered" many thousands of years before Columbus.  The ancestors of the Europeans at this time probably lived with a few hundred miles of each other. The Viking myths are simply myths. Paul Kekai Manansala    Being part viking myself (Danish/Pinoy), I must disagree with viking myths being simply myths. There are now stronger evidences to support the viking "myths". We may never know whether it WAS Leif Ericsson himself who landed in North America, but viking artifacts (viking combs, brooches, and a stone dwellings) have been found in New Foundland. Climatic evidences from the ice-core extractions from Greenland also suggests that the climate was warmer at the time, thereby suggesting that the possibility of growing vines (grape vines according to the sagas) was realistic.    If this is not convincing enough, then it is a reknown fact that the vikings landed in Greenland. Is Greenland not a geographical part of North America? Of course it is. Several artifacts and viking dwellings have been excavated around Qaqortoc in southern Greenland. These Nordic settlers were assimilated with the Inuits (Eskimos). The Inuit Greenlanders themselves around this area possess facial traits that are European. They certainly look distinct from Inuits of Alaska.    The nordic settlers that settled here were gradually isolated from the Kingdom of Norway-Denmark when the Nordic people were Christianized. Some still ventured out to these distant lands but Christianity eventually ensured total isolation by regarding the sagas as fairy tales and superstition. By the 14th and 15th century, the colony in Greenland was entirely neglected. The most distant Nordic settlers that were still contacted regularly were the Shetlanders, the Faeroese, and the Icelanders. The Icelanders were the last of the Nordic people to be Christianized. Their sagas and runic scriptures were almost destroyed by missionary christians. Fortunately, these somehow survived.    Attempts by King Magnus Ericson to recolonize Greenland in 1362 failed. Greenland was then rediscovered in the 16th century by a British navigators, Martin Frobisher and John Davis. It was then recolonized by Norway-Denmark in 1721 and became a Danish colony by 1815. Today, it is an autonomous part of the Danish Kingdom.    But I digress, the first Europeans to set foot on American soil WERE the Vikings. A FACT... NOT a myth. Kristian Jensen In article < N.112296....@ip55.image.dk >, No, I'm quite aware of the Greenland finds which are classified as "Viking." The fact is that there is no good reason to do so.  No Nordic human remains, nor any nordic linguistic remnants have been found from the site.  I know of no evidence suggesting that Greenland Inuits are more "European" than other Eskimos.  One has to be aware that there has been plenty of fraud concerning these kinds of studies in the past.  For example, in one study of modern Marquesan Islanders, which attempted to show they were "Caucasians,"  it was later found that the surveyors only accepted applicants who were mixed bloods of mostly European strain.  I don't know of any archaeological evidence of "Caucasian" skeletons being found in Greenland. All that was found was one site that *may* have dated to pre-contact times with artifacts and iron-working that seem to come from Europe.  There are many possible explanations for this, including retrieval of these items by the Inuit themselves.  A writer from early in this century named David MacRitchie cited the many legends which suggested Eskimo-like travelers in skin and bark craft coming to Europe in pre-contact times.  These legends are found in written form at earlier dates than the Norse ones.  Unfortunately, due to Eurocentric attitudes all evidence is always looked at from one viewpoint. Paul Kekai Manansala Paul Kekai Manansala < pmana...@csus.edu > wrote in article  > earlier dates than the >Norse ones.  Unfortunately, due to Eurocentric attitudes all > evidence is always looked at from one viewpoint.   Paul, the problem with your thinking is that your obsession with defining history causes you to concede that whatever culture discovers a continent should lay claim to it. I personally don't care who discovered the Americas, be it the Vikings, the Egyptians, Columbus or the friggin' Martians. I personally care not do dwell on what has happened, but to concentrate on what *could* happen - to put it plainly, you are clearly more concerned with the past, while a person like me is more concerned with the future. Enjoy the dark ages, homeboy. Send me a postcard when you have the time. : Paul Kekai Manansala < pmana...@csus.edu > wrote in article  > earlier : dates than the You seem to be under some misconception that your approach is superior to mine,  which shows your flawed views.  There are many different ways to approach a problem.  You can approach things anyway you want, but don't expect me to make the same mistakes. Paul Kekai Manansala  I personally care not do dwell on what has happened, but to > concentrate on what *could* happen - to put it plainly, you are clearly > more concerned with the past, while a person like me is more concerned with > the future. Knowing history is like having a compass.  Knowing what happened in the past is not some useless endeavour.  Anyone who is concerned with the future better know the lessons of history.  Hopefully, one can chart a better future. : > You seem to be under some misconception that your approach is : > superior to mine,  which shows your flawed views.  There are many : > different ways to approach a problem.  You can approach things : > anyway you want, but don't expect me to make the same mistakes. : > : You seem to be under some misconception that your approach is : superior to mine,  which shows your flawed views.  There are many : different ways to approach a problem.  You can approach things : anyway you want, but don't expect me to make the same mistakes. : Elson Raymund Garrote Trinidad > earlier dates than the Norse ones.  Unfortunately, due to Eurocentric > attitudes all > evidence is always looked at from one viewpoint. > You basically state that there is no nordic remains at Greenland and that there is only one site in Greenland, well... there are a lot of archaeological finds in Southern Greenland - both Inuit and nordic. I'll name a few: Of the Eastern viking settlement near Narsaq, Qaqortoq, and Nanortalik there is Brattahlid (Erik the Red's Estate), Bishop's Residence at Gander (near Igaliku in Narsaq), and there is the church ruin at Hvalsey (near Qaqortoq). Of the Western settlement we have a smaller less preserved sites near Nuuk (the capital of Greenland). Archeological finds of the Middle settlement is near Ivittuut. The evidences that supports that these WERE permanent settlements stems from the fact that there ARE viking burial sites near the aforementioned settlements. If such are not caucasian human remains, I don't know what is. There are also remains of domesticated animals to a lesser extent. As for linguistic remnants, well... vocally... the nordic settlers in Greenland were eventually assimilated with the Inuits when isolation took place. The last time Greenland was mentioned in documents was in 1409, after this the colony faded away into the realm of the forgotten. At around this time the Little Ice Age had already begun and brought with it climatic changes. With this in mind, it should be obvious that the isolated settlers were left in a harsher environment to survive in. If the settlers were ever to survive, I think the best way was to learn from the Inuits who were better adapted to polar conditions than the Vikings. Thus, the Viking settlers either died out or were eventually absorbed into Inuit culture. The Nordic language in Greenland disappeared. The vikings are also known for their ability to adapt a local culture and language. Russia was named after a viking leader named Rus who settled in Russia. The descendants of these vikings don't speak Scandinavian at all. In Normandy - North-western France, vikings also settled there but today we do not consider their descendants Scandinavians either. As for the written linguistic remnants -runes, these were seldomly used by the Vikings themselves except on special occasions. It takes a lot of effort to carve runes on wood or on stone for that matter. Runes were considered magical and only a few knew how to read them. It goes without saying that whatever runic remains that may exist in Greenland or in N. America are very scarce. Most of the runes would be found where there is a denser concentration of Nordic people; Scandinavia, Iceland, and some other parts of Northern Europe. Reflecting deeper on what you have said, I think you have confused the finds in Greenland with the ONE site in Newfoundland. This one site, at L'Anse aux Meadows, is unique. The site was NOT a settlement much like those in Iceland or Greenland. It was a base of operations where Nordic travelers to and from the New World wintered before proceeding with expeditions (due to limitations on seasonal time spans and remoteness). Therefore, there are no burial sites here (burial sites being a requirement for any permanent settlement). There is strong proof from artifacts that this site was definitely Nordic. Perhaps the strongest evidence on the site is the uncovering of an iron-ore smithery. The native indians in N. America did NOT use iron. Several iron nails were also found on the site. Iron was also not plentiful in Greenland. Finally, on your last point -Eurocentric views, I agree that most of world history is written in a European viewpoint. Even the word "Discovery" in World History is pretty Eurocentric. It implies that Europeans discovered parts of the world when in reality the natives were there before the Europeans. But where do we draw the line? Do we say that the Tabon Cave-man (homo erectus tabon) discovered the Philippines before the negritos? Still most scholars agree that the first settlers of the Philippines were the negritos. Is this because the Tabon Cave-man is now extinct? Perhaps. We can apply this to Greenland. Who first discovered Greenland? Archaeologists estimate that the Vikings and the Inuit ancestors (Thule people of the Dorset and small-tool tradition) arrived on the Island at about the same time. But because the there are no survivors of the Nordic settlers today, do we say the Inuits were ones that discovered Greenland? Perhaps. But we can´t say that they were the first who discovered North America. If we have to be concise, we probably have to say that the South American aboriginals were the ones who discovered North America. Discovery, is a chapter in World History. Part of this chapter is dedicated to the Nordic Explorations. But Nordic Exploration is also a part of European history, afterall the vikings ARE Europeans. So just because the vikings are Europeans, Paul, you can't just assume that this Nordic history in North America is Eurocentric. It isn't more Eurocentric than anything else that is part of European history. I'm cross posting this to soc.culture.nordic since they might be interested in this discussion. Are you referring to pre-columbian remains?  Vikings were not Christian so how could church ruins pertain to them?  There is only one site that is claimed to be pre-columbian. : The evidences that supports that these WERE permanent settlements stems from : the fact that there ARE viking burial sites near the aforementioned : settlements. If such are not caucasian human remains, I don't know what is. : There are also remains of domesticated animals to a lesser extent. There is no evidence of any domesticated animals from Europe in pre-columbian Greenland. : As for linguistic remnants, well... vocally... the nordic settlers in Greenland : were eventually assimilated with the Inuits when isolation took place. The last : time Greenland was mentioned in documents was in 1409, after this the colony : faded away into the realm of the forgotten. At around this time the Little Ice : Age had already begun and brought with it climatic changes. With this in mind, : it should be obvious that the isolated settlers were left in a harsher : environment to survive in. If the settlers were ever to survive, I think the : best way was to learn from the Inuits who were better adapted to polar : conditions than the Vikings. Thus, the Viking settlers either died out or were : eventually absorbed into Inuit culture. The Nordic language in Greenland : disappeared. The vikings are also known for their ability to adapt a local : culture and language. Russia was named after a viking leader named Rus who : settled in Russia. The descendants of these vikings don't speak Scandinavian at : all. In Normandy - North-western France, vikings also settled there but today : we do not consider their descendants Scandinavians either. I doubt very much if one could buy the idea of the Vikings being completely assimilated by Inuits.  Still, even if this was the case, one should still expect a Nordic substratum in the local languages.  There is none. : As for the written linguistic remnants -runes, these were seldomly used by the : Vikings themselves except on special occasions. It takes a lot of effort to : carve runes on wood or on stone for that matter. Runes were considered magical : and only a few knew how to read them. It goes without saying that whatever : runic remains that may exist in Greenland or in N. America are very scarce. : Most of the runes would be found where there is a denser concentration of : Nordic people; Scandinavia, Iceland, and some other parts of Northern Europe. This is really can be explained in more than one one.  I don't think that most specialists accept these pictographs as being related.  We are getting into Thor Heyerdahl-type archaeology here. : Reflecting deeper on what you have said, I think you have confused the finds in : Greenland with the ONE site in Newfoundland. This one site, at L'Anse aux : Meadows, is unique. The site was NOT a settlement much like those in Iceland or : Greenland. It was a base of operations where Nordic travelers to and from the : New World wintered before proceeding with expeditions (due to limitations on : seasonal time spans and remoteness). Therefore, there are no burial sites here : (burial sites being a requirement for any permanent settlement). There is : strong proof from artifacts that this site was definitely Nordic. Perhaps the : strongest evidence on the site is the uncovering of an iron-ore smithery. The : native indians in N. America did NOT use iron. Several iron nails were also : found on the site. Iron was also not plentiful in Greenland. Again, there is no evidence of Nordic people at L'Anse aux Meadows,  just a site of questionable dating.  There are no Nordic skeletal remains, nor any sign that Nordics were ever here in terms of the language and physical traits of the local people. : Finally, on your last point -Eurocentric views, I agree that most of world : history is written in a European viewpoint. Even the word "Discovery" in World : History is pretty Eurocentric. It implies that Europeans discovered parts of : the world when in reality the natives were there before the Europeans. But : where do we draw the line? Do we say that the Tabon Cave-man (homo erectus : tabon) discovered the Philippines before the negritos? Still most scholars : agree that the first settlers of the Philippines were the negritos. Is this : because the Tabon Cave-man is now extinct? Perhaps. We can apply this to : Greenland. Who first discovered Greenland? Archaeologists estimate that the : Vikings and the Inuit ancestors (Thule people of the Dorset and small-tool : tradition) arrived on the Island at about the same time. But because the there : are no survivors of the Nordic settlers today, do we say the Inuits were ones : that discovered Greenland? Perhaps. But we can´t say that they were the first : who discovered North America. If we have to be concise, we probably have to say : that the South American aboriginals were the ones who discovered North America. : Discovery, is a chapter in World History. Part of this chapter is dedicated to : the Nordic Explorations. But Nordic Exploration is also a part of European : history, afterall the vikings ARE Europeans. So just because the vikings are : Europeans, Paul, you can't just assume that this Nordic history in North : America is Eurocentric. It isn't more Eurocentric than anything else that is : part of European history. You're not referring to unbiased scholarship here, but just the opposite. The interpretations are forced and more reasonable alternatives are ignored.  You ignored the possiblity that the Greenland site may have been an Eskimo settlement that made contact with Europe. The only native people there are Eskimo not Nordic. Again,  there is no evidence of any pre-columbian European contact with the Western Hemispere. Paul Kekai Manansala > Are you referring to pre-columbian remains?  Vikings were not Christian > so how could church ruins pertain to them?  There is only one site that is > claimed to be pre-columbian. Vikings were not Christian, strange! King Harald Bluetooth of Denmark makes Christianity the state religion in 864 AD and builds the first church in Jelling Denmark. Numerous crosses and other christian relics have been found in Viking graves in Scandinavia as well as in Greenland. In fact the Vikings were christians in the whole later period of the Viking age which is about 300 years.   > There is no evidence of any domesticated animals from Europe in pre-columbian > Greenland. Wrong, bones of sheep, horses and cattle have been found dating to 1200 AD in the settlements of both Österbygden and Westerbygden in Greenland.   > This is really can be explained in more than one one.  I don't think that > most specialists accept these pictographs as being related.  We are > getting into Thor Heyerdahl-type archaeology here. Wrong again, Numerous runic *texts*, not pictograms!, have been found in Greenland, craved on household objects or as staves found the coffins in the graveyard in Vesterbygden. Some of these inworking the blessings of the saints or the Virgin Mary to protect the soul of the dead. In addition, you should know that during the exgavation of the graveyards of Vesterbygden more than 100 skeletons, as well as well preserved clothes have been found. The human remains are undoubtly european as are the clothes which have been dated to the 11th century.   > You're not referring to unbiased scholarship here, but just the opposite. > The interpretations are forced and more reasonable alternatives are > ignored. What a load of BS. You are simply ignoring loads of archelogials artefacts+ historical texts! You should really do a bit of reading on this subject or go and visit the National Museums in Nuuk, Greenland or Copenhagen, Denmark. . Again,  there is no evidence of > any pre-columbian European contact with the Western Hemispere. Bizarre, so all the artefacts and human remains displayed at the museums  mentioned above are fakes? To claim that the are no evidence of precolombian european presence in Greenland is so ridiculous, that there is no reason togive you any credits for serious scholarship whatsoever. henrik ernoe This all started out as an innocent correction to Paul Manansala when he mentioned in the earlier parts of this thread that the Nordic discoveries of N. America are just myths. I have tried to give him what I know as proofs of the Nordic settlements in Greenland since it is undoubtebly a part of N. America. I myself thought that what I provided as proofs was sufficient enough. I would especially think that graves and nordic remains in Greenland that is clearly caucasian is enough proof to convince him. I really do not know what makes Paul so stubborn. I applaud the comments you have made and hope by now that Paul is convinced. I have heard so much about the museum's collection of archeological finds from Greenland's Nordic history. Before seeing your post, I had planned to go to the National Museum here in Copenhagen to do a bit more research so that I might better convince our friend. Despite your (in my opinion) very convincing post, I'm still going to the National Museum tomorrow to have a peek. Thanks, >caucasian is enough proof to convince him. I really do not know what makes Paul >so stubborn. > >I applaud the comments you have made and hope by now that Paul is convinced. I >have heard so much about the museum's collection of archeological finds from >Greenland's Nordic history. Before seeing your post, I had planned to go to the >National Museum here in Copenhagen to do a bit more research so that I might >better convince our friend. Despite your (in my opinion) very convincing post, >I'm still going to the National Museum tomorrow to have a peek. I was reading this thread and the best way to present these evidence is to cite a book or a publication from a reputable historical journal.  Include the date, volume and page numbers.  Otherwise, no one can see for themselves whether what is written by someone has scientific foundation or not. : > Are you referring to pre-columbian remains?  Vikings were not Christian : > so how could church ruins pertain to them?  There is only one site that is : > claimed to be pre-columbian. : Vikings were not Christian, strange! King Harald Bluetooth of Denmark : makes Christianity the state religion in 864 AD and builds the first : church in Jelling Denmark. Numerous crosses and other christian relics : have been found in Viking graves in Scandinavia as well as in Greenland. : In fact the Vikings were christians in the whole later period of the : Viking age which is about 300 years. That the Vikings followed mostly the Norse religion during the Viking period is verified by most historical works.  Viking kings, here and there, embraced Christianity, for example,  Rollo embraced the religion around 912.   During most of the period, the Vikings were referred to in historical works as heathens and pagans.  :   : > There is no evidence of any domesticated animals from Europe in pre-columbian : > Greenland. : Wrong, bones of sheep, horses and cattle have been found dating to 1200 AD : in the settlements of both Österbygden and Westerbygden in Greenland. I doubt if such datings are accurate.  Dating is not absolute and has to be verified by stratigraphic context.  If you read a book entitled "Forbidden Archaeology,"  you'll find all kinds of wild dates including iron dated to millions of years ago.  Graham Hancock might be interested in these dates though. : > This is really can be explained in more than one one.  I don't think that : > most specialists accept these pictographs as being related.  We are : > getting into Thor Heyerdahl-type archaeology here. : Wrong again, Numerous runic *texts*, not pictograms!, have been found : in Greenland, craved on household objects or as staves found the coffins : in the graveyard in Vesterbygden. Some of these inworking the blessings : of the saints or the Virgin Mary to protect the soul of the dead. Barry Fell et al. have been trying to connect "runes" in North America with Celtic and other scripts for some time.  There is not accepted evidence of Christianity in Greenland before Columbus. : In addition, you should know that during the exgavation of the : graveyards of Vesterbygden more than 100 skeletons, as well as well : preserved clothes have been found. The human remains are undoubtly : european as are the clothes which have been dated to the 11th century. Sorry, no European skeletons have been found in the Western hemisphere. Some people have tried to claim that "Proto-Caucasoids" have been found there, but this is just Eurocentric anthropology again.  The traits considered proto-Caucasoid are simply variation that have been present in the Western Hemisphere for the longest time.  For example,  Eskimos themselves as a type have prominent noses (See Stephen Molnar's  _Human Variation-) and this has nothing to do with European admixture.   Also, I don't think the datings you give for European clothes are widely accepted although they prove nothing concerning racial type. :   : > You're not referring to unbiased scholarship here, but just the opposite. : > The interpretations are forced and more reasonable alternatives are : > ignored. : What a load of BS. You are simply ignoring loads of archelogials : artefacts+ historical texts! You should really do a bit of reading on this : subject or go and visit the National Museums in Nuuk, Greenland or : Copenhagen, Denmark. Its just biased nonsense, like Thor Heyerdahl trying to claim Mayans and Polynesians were blond Nordics.  When the English explored Greenland in the 16th century the only people there were Inuits.  No Nordics, no Nordic language, nada.  Nor have any "European" skeletons ever been found with verified datings from the pre-Columbian period. Paul Kekai Manansala > > -- I am not a scholar on the subject of Nordic exploration, as such I do not read historical journals. I do have reputable books on the subject but they are in Danish. If I was to cite Danish books then nobody here will be able to read them anyway. I have gone to the National Museum here in Copenhagen and have seen the exhibit of Nordic Greenland which includes several things. On display are artifacts from the archaeological diggings; clothing, skeletons, crosses from the churches, rosaries, boxes with runic inscriptions, etc. Then there are also pictures of the church ruins in Greenland. I seriously do not believe pre-columbian inuits built churches. I have seen pictures of the graves. One of the graves was a of a bishop in Gardar. This could be seen by the fact that the individual was buried with his bishop's staff and his bishop's ring. Out of respect, this grave is no covered again with a more permanent gravestone on top with writings in both Danish and Greenlandic-Inuit. But if you people out there want a really good book, I can cite a Danish book (I do not know if there is an English edition of it) published by the National Museum: "Erik den Rodes Gronland/Qallunaat-siaaqarfik Kalaallit Nunaat" by Knud J. Krogh.  It is a book written in both Inuit and Danish with a detailed account of all the Nordic finds in Greenland. It includes pictures, maps, and diagrams. But as for an existence of an English edition I do not know. If I was to translate the title, it would be called, "Eric the Red's Greenland". -Kristian > : In article <57i807$ j...@news.csus.edu >, sac5...@saclink3.csus.edu (Paul > : (Kekai) Manansala) wrote: > : > Are you referring to pre-columbian remains?  Vikings were not Christian > : > so how could church ruins pertain to them?  There is only one site that is > : > claimed to be pre-columbian. > : Vikings were not Christian, strange! King Harald Bluetooth of Denmark > : makes Christianity the state religion in 864 AD and builds the first > : church in Jelling Denmark. Numerous crosses and other christian relics > : have been found in Viking graves in Scandinavia as well as in Greenland. > > : In fact the Vikings were christians in the whole later period of the > : Viking age which is about 300 years. > > That the Vikings followed mostly the Norse religion during the Viking > period is verified by most historical works.  Viking kings, here and > there, embraced Christianity, for example,  Rollo embraced the religion > around 912.   During most of the period, the Vikings were referred to in > historical works as heathens and pagans. True, the vikings were heathens during most of the viking period. But the Nordic people themselves were Christians in the later part of the Viking period and all of the medieval period. I myself have seen the holy runic stone at the church in Jelling, Denmark. It portrays Jesus on the cross surounded in runic writings. What Henrik has said is true, that Harald Bluetooth declared Norway-Denmark Christian. Most Vikings did not accept the Christian faith at the time, but Christianity nevertheless spread across the Nordic world, including Greenland. By the 12th century, all of the Nordic people where Christians to a certain extent, although some still practiced paganism in private. According to sagas, the first church in Greenland was built by Leif Ericsson at about 1000 AD. However, no one is sure when exactly the first church in Greenland was built. But numerous Nordic church ruins dot the Southern Greenlandic landscape. I have seen pictures of these masonry ruins. Around these ruins, archeaologists have dug out an entire grave of Nordic people. Some finds included clothes of these people. I have seen these clothes in the National Museum here in Copenhagen and they look very medieval - many with hoods with a long tail or tassle. The period in which these nordic people lived in Greenland was up to the late 15th century - the medieval period in Europe. This is the period in which most if not all of Europe had bowed down to Christianity. Are you telling me that these ruins were built by the pre-columbian Inuits? Are you telling me that pre-columbian Inuits practiced Christianity and built churches in Greenland. Are you telling me that pre-columbian Inuits carved runes on their holy crucifixes? Are you telling me that Inuits weaved wool into medieval European clothing? Are you telling me that pre-columbian Inuits raised sheep, horses, and cattle? And finally, are you telling me that the over 300 archeaological sites and ruins in Greenland that has been positively identified as Nordic is only ONE site?!?! > > : > There is no evidence of any domesticated animals from Europe in > pre-columbian > Barry Fell et al. have been trying to connect "runes" in North America > with Celtic and other scripts for some time.  There is not accepted > evidence of Christianity in Greenland before Columbus. What about the several church ruins that are seen dotting the Southern Greenland landscape?!! When these church ruins were excavated, several church artifacts were found. Wooden and/or narwhale-ivory crucifixes with runic inscriptions. In a site called Gardar, a bishop's grave was found. The body was buried together with a bishops' staff and a bishops' ring. The staff itself was of Nordic design similar to bishops' staffs found in Iceland. Some of the coffins also had blessings of saints and the Virgin Mary in runic. Within some coffins, a piece of wood can be found with runic inscriptions stating who the deceased is and where/when the deceased died. These artifacts ARE accepted evidence of Christianity in Greenland before Columbus. > > : In addition, you should know that during the exgavation of the > : graveyards of Vesterbygden more than 100 skeletons, as well as well > : preserved clothes have been found. The human remains are undoubtly > : european as are the clothes which have been dated to the 11th century. > > Sorry, no European skeletons have been found in the Western hemisphere. > Some people have tried to claim that "Proto-Caucasoids" have been found > there, but this is just Eurocentric anthropology again.  The traits > considered proto-Caucasoid are simply variation that have been present > in the Western Hemisphere for the longest time.  For example,  Eskimos > themselves as a type have prominent noses (See Stephen Molnar's  _Human > Variation-) and this has nothing to do with European admixture.   > Also, I don't think the datings you give for European clothes are widely > accepted although they prove nothing concerning racial type. Sorry, there ARE European skeletons that have been found in Greenland. Once again, the excavations of the church ruins reveals several skeletons of European features. If these were Inuit skeletons, then the cephalic features of Inuit skulls would surely show. I believe that you are aware that prominent noses is not the only thing that one looks at to identify the race of a skeleton. Christian skeletons are also more likely to be Nordic from Iceland rather than Inuit. As it is, the skulls in the graves are Nordic. The clothes that are found there are also Medieval European. Are you telling me that pre-columbian Inuits weaved clothes out of wool? Are you telling me that the pre-columbian Inuits made and used the weaving-looms that has been found? Are you telling me that the mill-stones that are found were used by pre-columbian Inuits to grind grains? Inuits were not farmers, they were nomadic and did not raise sheep or grow any grains. Are you telling me that the woven clothes that were made were sewn together by pre-columbian Inuits to resemble European Medieval clothing? Inuits wore seal-skin kamiks and boots. All in all, are you telling me that pre-columbian Inuit culture resembled European agricultural society to such a stricking degree, only to be forgotten a couple of centuries later just before Frobisher rediscovered the island? With so many things that have been found in the numerous Nordic ruins and sites around Southern Greenland, I really doubt that there is any reason to doubt the existence of Nordic people in pre-columbian Greenland. > :   > : > You're not referring to unbiased scholarship here, but just the opposite. > : > The interpretations are forced and more reasonable alternatives are > : > ignored. > : What a load of BS. You are simply ignoring loads of archelogials > : artefacts+ historical texts! You should really do a bit of reading on this > : subject or go and visit the National Museums in Nuuk, Greenland or > : Copenhagen, Denmark. > Its just biased nonsense, like Thor Heyerdahl trying to claim Mayans and > Polynesians were blond Nordics.  When the English explored Greenland > in the 16th century the only people there were Inuits.  No Nordics, no > Nordic language, nada.  Nor have any "European" skeletons ever been > found with verified datings from the pre-Columbian period. > No, not nonsense. This is nothing like Thor Heyerdahl. Of course Thor Heyerdahl's theories are not widely accepted. Thor Heyerdahl only had wild theories based on stories which he attempted to prove by his adventures on the sea. He did not have any archeaological evidences of his wild ideas. Greenland on the other hand not only has viking sagas that tell of Nordic settlement in Greenland, not only has Inuit stories that tell of violent conflicts with bearded men, it also has several Nordic ruins and Nordic churches dotting the Southern Greenland landscape. It has church graves of European people dressed in European clothing. There are graves of Medieval Bishops. It has European farm artifacts such as the mill-stones and weaving-looms. There are bones of sheeps, cattle, and horses dating from the Medieval period. There are iron weapons and farm tools like spearheads and sickles (note that iron is not abundant in Greenland, nor is there any evidence that Inuits used iron tools or practiced agriculture). There are toy viking ships that nordic children once played with. There are chess pieces that adults played with. There are so many Nordic artifacts/findings in Southern Greenland that to deny pre-columbian Nordic settlement in Greenland is preposterous. Its true that when the English explored Greenland in the 16th century there was only Inuits. No nordic people? - true. No nordic language? - true. Nada? -false, there were ruins. Danish colonizers found these ruins without being entirely sure themselves what they were. But today archeaological excavations of these sites makes us quite sure. No one really knows today what happened to the Nordic settlers, but the generally accepted theory is that they simply died off. Early medieval documents records trade with Greenland for fur and narwhale-ivory up until the late 1300s. Medieval documents in Iceland records the posting of Bishops to Greenland in the same period where the last bishop of Greenland died at 1378. When a trade route to the ivories of Africa was found instead to be more economical, trade with Greenland ceased. The last medieval records of living Nordic people in Greenland was on the year 1409. After this, interest in Greenland ceased and the colony was neglected. Paul, you should really take a look at the the artifacts and pictures in the Museums in either Copenhagen, Denmark or Nuuk, Greenland. If you can't, you should take a look at historical texts regarding this. Take a look at the pictures of the ruins. I must agree with Henrik that you ARE ignoring SO much of these. Someone once told me that the discovery of once own ignorance is the key to knowledge - I myself have certainly learned a lot of things I previously did not know by researching for the contribution to this thread. -Kristian Ligsay Jensen PS. The sources from which I have gathered the facts for my post are Danish books I have borrowed from the Head Library in Copenhagen, and descriptions I have gathered at the Danish National Museum. If for some reason, you'd still want me to cite these Danish sources, I will try and translate them for you.

Ferdinand Magellan

Known as an experiment in community, art, radical self-expression, and radical self-reliance, the Burning Man festival was held this year in the Black Rock Desert-High Rock Canyon Emigrant Trails National Conservation Area in what US state?

MAGELLAN - THE WORLD TRAVELER - THE DREAM AND THE REALITY MAGELLAN - THE WORLD TRAVELER Ellen MacArthur Who Sails The World Alone The Dream and the Reality by Dee Finney Please be patient while large maps load What A Wonderful World I see trees of green, red roses too I see them bloom for me and you And I think to myself what a wonderful world. I see skies of blue and clouds of white The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night And I think to myself what a wonderful world. The colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky Are also on the faces of people going by I see friends shaking hands saying how do you do They're really saying I love you. I hear babies crying, I watch them grow They'll learn much more than I'll never know And I think to myself what a wonderful world Yes I think to myself what a wonderful world YOU CAN PLAY THE MUSIC BELOW TO SING TO There comes a time when we hear a certain call When the world must come together as one There are people dying Oh, and it's time to lend a hand to life The greatest gift of all We can't go on pretending day by day That someone, somewhere will soon make a change We're all a part of God's great big family And the truth you know love is all we need (CHORUS) We are the world, we are the children We are the ones who make a brighter day so let's start giving There's a choice we're making We're saving our own lives It's true we'll make a better day Just you and me Well, send them your heart So they know that someone cares And their lives will be stronger and free As God has shown us By turning stones to bread And so we all must lend a helping hand ( REPEAT CHORUS ) When you're down and out There seems no hope at all But if you just believe There's no way we can fall Well, well, well, let's realize That one change can only come When we stand together as one ( REPEAT CHORUS ) . Note from Dee Finney:  2-05-2001 When I dream, I often wonder why I dream the way I do, since I seem to dream differently than other people I know well such as family and friends. (Not to say that other people who write to us don't dream incredible topics, or have fantastic nighttime experiences. Lots of people have wonderful, spiritual, and sometimes prophetic dreams. ) My quest for many years, as well as Joe Mason, has always been to try to teach people, who aren't paying attention, how important their dreams are to their future, not to mention that people are dreaming the future enmasse. The question for everyone is always: where is the lesson in this for me? Why did I dream this? Was this really a 'dream'?  Or was it something else? I always keep my mind open for other explanations for the dream world than the little mental box I was given to think in as a child. The dream I had was about world travel and to see it from a higher perspective than did Magellan, or even myself or my relatives did in the past.  There are many ways to see the world from our modern perspective, as in the music I have presented above, compared to the world that Magellan saw in 1519 or Columbus in 1492 for that matter.  In the early years of trading, there was the Silk Road across Asia to China and at the time of Jesus, in 5 BC. , Joseph of Arimathea was already trading in tin with England and sailing the Atlantic. The Vikings were crossing the Atlantic  starting around 900 A.D.to the Americas  ... way before Columbus ... remember Americus Vespucci? How Did America Get It's Name? It is generally assumed and taught that America is named after the explorer Americus Vespucci (1451-1512). Others claim that America is named after Richard Ameryke, enthusiastic supporter and financier of the explorer John Cabot (1450-1498). The name America, however, is much older, and has been attached to this great land since the time of the Vikings or before and hundreds of years prior to the time of Columbus, Cabot or Vespucci. It has been suggested that "America" is derived from the old Norse word "Ommerike" (oh-meh-ric-eh), which was in common use among the North Atlantic sailing fraternity from the beginning of the 11th century. (Did The Vikings Name America, by Dick Wicken, (1980, p. 1) Omme means "out there," "final," or "ultimate." Rike (spelled a number of ways in ancient Norse manuscripts such as rige, rega, rike, rikja, and reykja) means "great land," "kingdom," and "empire." It is the equivalent of the Gaeli "righ" and the German "reich." The Old Norse ommerike, is a slightly corrupted form of the still more ancient Visigothic term amalric. (Phonetically, the "I" is interchangeable with "r" as with many languages, thus giving us "amorric," ~~~~~~~~~ More Explorers Chinese sailors made it all the way to Africa in 1424. Cortez crossed the Atlantic in 1513 and conquered the Aztecs and wiped them out. The Aztecs were expecting the return of Quetzalcoatl from across the seas who was a white man. Where was he from? If you think way back to the time of Atlantis of MU, there was travel across the oceans in boats made of reeds according to Thor Heyerdahl.   The placement of Atlantis in the Atlantic Ocean has long been debated.  Then too, there is the mythological tale of Jason and the Argonauts . The Phoenicians sailed the oceans in long ago ancient days as well, as far back as 600 BC. The Romans ruled Egypt for a long time and it's very difficult to get there overland. Alexandria was a famous sea port in ancient days. Marco Polo (1254-1324), is probably the most famous Westerner who traveled on the Silk Road. He traveled for 24 years across Asia, returning by ship through the China Sea and to Sumatra and the Indian Ocean, and finally docked at Hormuz. When he died, his epitaph said: "I have only told the half of what I saw!" On his voyage home, over 600 passengers and crew died and no records were kept as to the reason. All of the world travelers were not just seeking new lands for the joy of seeing new places. For example, in 1452, Pope Nicholas V issued a papal bull allowing the enslavement of "pagans and infidels" justifying all European slaving expeditions to Africa. In order to spread Christ's message to "heathen" masses while protecting the Church's sovereignty over the new territories, the Church sent missionaries to accompany many of the voyages of overseas expansion. The Church eventually granted kingdoms like Portugal and Spain political sovereignty over these territories, clearly establishing the Church's ultimate authority in European society. Portugal and Spain conquered much of South America. Over the many years of ocean exploration, many ships were lost at sea, and sailors now expend great amounts of money and even their lives looking for the lost treasures. History of Ocean Exploration THE DREAM 2-5-01 - This dream began with a computer screen of some topics which had been introduced in an earlier dream I think. I had to rearrange them in some reasonable order.  Included in these were links to other pages I had already done. The dream then switched to a people dream in which I was cooking in a small kitchen, and was making dinner for the family. Somewhere during the process, Edward - my ex-husband showed up and he told us of his world travels. While he told about his world travels, there was another woman whom I don't know between him and I. He told about places I knew he had never been to ... at least in this lifetime. ( He never ventured beyond the West Coast before he met me) Neither the other woman or I was given the time to tell about our own world travels, as small as mine are. (As an aside to the dream, this will help explain it a little. I traveled outside the State of Wisconsin only 3 times before I met Edward. Twice, this distance was only about 20 miles outside the state line just so I could say I had been out of the state. I was raised by an extremely protective family and my first marriage was the same. I was protected by means of 'fear' stories by both my father and my first husband. Just to give the reader perspective on the way I was raised, I wasn't even allowed to drive a car until I was 35. I was never allowed to travel alone with friends when I was younger for fear there might be a car or bus accident. Now that I was an adult, I was terrified when I left Wisconsin that people on the West Coast were different than Wisconsin people. I watched lots of TV so that I would see people from the West Coast to see how they were before I made my final decision to go there. It was for spiritual reasons that I went since I had to leave my grown children and young grandchildren behind and they were all against my leaving to join my husband who had no choice about going. However, once I got there, I found that lots of people were from Wisconsin. My doctor came from a neighborhood only 5 blocks from where I lived in Wisconsin. My worries were for naught. Once I got out of the fear beliefs, I found that people everywhere were wonderful, caring, and loving. As it was, during our marriage we lived in 5 different states, all west of Lake Michigan. After I left my husband, I went home back to Wisconsin and he continued traveling from state to state, and lived in 4 more states in the next few years. I have since moved to California to be with my wonderful Joe. We met on the internet and fell in love very quickly and decided we should get together and do this website about dreams.) In the dream, all I could do was sit on the side quietly and hope that this unexpected visit went well. I was expecting trouble with him as his visits were always extremely stressful. At that point, Edward left the house without saying a word and a very tall man about 7 feet tall was trying to show me something on a very high shelf which was even higher, but I don't recall what that was. (Symbolically, I'm certain he was trying to make me look at a higher perspective of what was going on.) I looked at the clock and saw that it was 7 p.m. and then remembered I had to feed the people who were left in the house and as I asked the children whether they wanted Chinese or American food, which I saw was stacked in kettles on top of each other on the stove. The kettle of Chinese food was actually on top of the American stew. I started to wake up as I was pondering this. While I was waking up, a computer screen or sheet of paper appeared in a vision. It said, "With your permission, we'd like to begin a discussion of the world travels of Magellan." On this screen, an outline of a study of Magellan and all the places he traveled in the world appeared as one would make an outline of a book or long story. The outline faded quickly but I understood that I needed to know about this world traveler and what was the higher perspective of world traveling.  I have no clue as to the 'we' who presented the outline to me. Thinking back to how I was raised, I marvel at the tremendous courage it must have taken to travel around the world when the journey and the outcome was completely unknown. PREVIOUS EARTHCHANGE EVIDENCE "Piri Reis and the Hapgood Hypotheses" in "Aramco World Magazine" (Jan-Feb 1980) by Paul F. Hoye with Paul Lunde In 1929, scholars working in the archives of the Ottoman Empire in Turkey's Topkapi Palace Museum made an exciting discovery: a section of an early 16th-century Ottoman map based in part, apparently, on the original chart drawn or used by Christopher Columbus and showing his historic discoveries in the New World. The map, signed by an Ottoman captain named Piri Reis, was dated 1513, just 21 years after Columbus discovered America. This find -- disclosed two years later in Holland by German Orientalist Paul Kahle -- astonished the 18th Congress of Orientalists. For if a notation on the map were true -- "The coasts and islands on this map are taken from Columbus's map" -- the Turkish map might finally settle a centuries-old debate: did Columbus know he had found a new world? Or did he die thinking he had found a new route to China? As it turned out, the map did not settle the question. To the contrary, it has raised new and far more perplexing questions, and, in recent years, has sparked a rash of quasi-scientific and popular theories and hypotheses that attempt to answer those questions. Some of those theories, to be sure, verge on the ludicrous. But others, even when startling, have raised fascinating and sometimes disturbing possibilities. Those developments, however, came later. In 1931, historians of cartography had quite enough to do trying to cope with the immediate questions posed by the discovery in Istanbul. Was the Piri Reis map authentic? If so, how did it get into the hands of Christian Spain's feared Muslim rivals? And just who, incidentally, was this Piri Reis? According to subsequent research, the story of the Piri Reis map began in 1501, just nine years after Columbus discovered the New World, when Kemal Reis, a captain in the Ottoman fleet, captured seven ships off the coast of Spain, interrogated the crews and discovered that one man had sailed with Columbus on his great voyages of discovery. More important, in an age when maps were secret and maritime information invaluable, the sailor had in his possession a map of the New World drawn by Columbus himself. Kemal Reis seized the map, kept it and subsequently willed it to his nephew Piri Reis, also an Ottoman naval captain, and a cartographer. In 1511, the story goes on, Piri Reis began to draw a new map of the world which was to incorporate all of the recent Spanish and Portuguese discoveries. To do so, he used about 20 source maps. Among them, he wrote, were eight maps of the world done in the time of Alexander the Great (the fourth century B.C.), an Arab map of India, four Portuguese maps of the Indian Ocean and China, and his uncle Kemal's bequest, "a map drawn by Columbus in the western region." He did not, however, say what the other six source maps were. In Gallipoli, where he temporarily retired, Piri Reis reduced his source maps to a single scale -- a difficult task in those days -- and spent three years producing his map. When it was finished he added this inscription: "The author of this is the humble Piri Hajji Muhammad, known as the nephew of Kemal Reis, in the town of Gallipoli in the Holy Month of Muharram of the year 919 [A.D. 1513]." This map, presented to Sultan Selim, seems to have helped the career of Piri Reis. He was made an admiral. But it was not Piri Reis' only contribution to cartography. In 1521 he also wrote a mariner's guide to the coasts and islands of the Mediterranean -- which was to interest the cartographers trying to authenticate the map found in Istanbul. Called "Kitab-i Bahriye" ("Book of the Mariner," or "The Naval Handbook"), this book contained an account of the discovery of America by Columbus that was virtually identical to a long inscription on the left hand side of the map found in the archives of Istanbul. The map found in Istanbul, therefore, is authentic. Although research has never disclosed what the six unlisted sources were, or further identified the eight "done in the time of Alexander the Great," there is no doubt that one source was a map drawn or used by Christopher Columbus himself. There is little doubt, either, that both Piri Reis' map and book were valuable to the Ottoman Empire. Focusing, as they both did, on discoveries by Spanish and Portuguese mariners, they probably alerted the sultan to the growing threat to Ottoman power posed by European exploration of the Indian Ocean and the Arabian Gulf. Ironically, Piri Reis' book -- in which he urged Suleiman the Magnificent to drive the Portuguese out of the Red Sea and the Gulf -- also led to his death. Put in command of a fleet to drive the Portuguese out of the Gulf in 1551, he lost most of his ships and, although in his 80's, was executed. By 1929 both Piri Reis  and his map had been virtually forgotten. Even then the enthusiasm aroused by the map was short. Once the initial excitement over the discovery had faded, relatively few historians of cartography, with the exception of Kahle, paid much attention to the map or tried seriously to determine exactly what it proved -- even with regard to Columbus. "Imago Mundi," for example, one of the more important journals devoted to the history of cartography, has never run a full-length article on the Piri Reis map. In 1954, however, a Harvard-trained teacher of the history of science named Charles Hapgood assigned his class at Keene State College in New Hampshire to the task of examining the Piri Reis map more closely. Starting with little knowledge of the subject -- and, says Professor Hapgood emphatically, "no preconceived notions" -- he and his students eventually spent seven years on the project. During that time, Hapgood says, "we discarded hundreds of hypotheses" before arriving at those advanced in a book called "Maps of the Ancient Sea Kings." Two years later those hypotheses became unexpectedly famous when they were incorporated in the controversial best-seller "Chariots of the Gods." Written by Erich von Daniken, "Chariots" went into at least 18 English editions and was translated into numerous other languages. Presented as fact, and written in a pseudo-scientific tone, "Chariots" described and briefly examined what the author called "the unsolved mysteries of the past." Among the "unsolved mysteries," von Daniken said, was the appearance on the Piri Reis map of information that 16th-century cartographers could not possibly have known. Citing Hapgood, von Daniken said that the map showed the coast of Antarctica, not discovered for centuries afterward, and certain mountains in Antarctica that were not discovered until modern sonar made it possible to locate them beneath the ice cap. For the author -- if not for his legions of critics -- it was obvious how Piri Reis got such information: astronauts from another planet had provided it on maps. The astronauts, he claimed, had made numerous appearances on earth before and during the period of recorded history, and left traces all over the world. Despite inaccuracies in describing what in some cases are mysteries -- and in citing Hapgood -- and despite frequently debatable logic, "Chariots" sold millions of copies. It also persuaded thousands of readers -- brought up during a period of intense public interest in "flying saucers" and "UFO's" -- that its premises were valid. "Chariots," indeed, attracted such attention that BBC Television filmed and showed a two-part refutation of the book. The BBC, moreover, was not alone; most serious observers scorned the book. Yet one of the points raised by  Hapgood and quoted by von Daniken went stubbornly unanswered: how did Piri Reis know about Antarctica and its mountains in the 16th century, if, in fact, his map did show them? One answer, in science-fiction form, was put forth by author Allan W. Eckert in a ponderous 1977 novel called "The Hab Theory" in which the Ottoman admiral's map was a focal point of the plot and in which other, apparently true, phenomena were described in  great detail. Among them was the undeniable fact that mammoths - - extinct for 18,000 years -- were found in Siberia embedded in the permafrost, the frozen subsoil of Arctic and Antarctic regions. According to Eckert, the mammoths were "quick-frozen" rather the way orange juice is today, thus explaining why the meat was still edible. Furthermore, some mammoths were found in an upright position with undigested grasses in their stomachs-- facts confirmed last July by a spokesman at the British Museum. The grasses, moreover, were tropical grasses. To Eckert, this suggested that Siberia was once a tropical region and that the shift in climate from tropic to arctic was very swift: in a matter of hours. This occurred, "The Hab Theory" goes on, because every 6,000 years or so the polar regions accumulate so much ice that the earth begins to wobble on its axis. At a critical point the wobble becomes so bad that the earth capsizes, leaving the polar regions at the equator and the equatorial regions at the poles. The earth's normal rotation them resumes until the new polar regions accumulate enough ice to cause another wobble and another cataclysm. This process, the book continues, explains what characters in the book call scientific mysteries. One is that the ancient Berbers, in what is now the Sahara, left cave paintings showing people swimming and sailing in "a vast body of water." This, according to "The Hab Theory," was a sea created when the earth capsized and the polar ice cap, now close to the equator, melted, creating a large sea -- now reduced to today's Lake Chad. Even for science fiction, it is a startling idea. Yet it is not entirely without a basis in fact. In the "New Scientist" issue of May 17, 1979, two professors from Cardiff and Oxford Universities in Britain were quoted as saying that the last ice age may have come quite swiftly and cited the mammoths in Siberia as proof. "Their excellent state of preservation is also evidence that they were quickly frozen after death," the article said. Science fiction, of course, is as much fiction as science.  Still, at the heart of "The Hab Theory" there were some ascertainable facts. The Piri Reis map does exist, there were mammoths preserved in Siberian permafrost, and cave painting so some sort have been found in the Sahara, though whether they show "vast seas" or not could not be determined. Even more to the point, there is a real Hab theory. In fact, according to Professor Hapgood, the real Hab theory--as distinct from Eckert's science-fiction treatment -- was what launched him on his first studies of Antarctic "mysteries" and led, in a curious chain of events, to the Piri Reis map. The real Hab theory was first proposed by an engineer specializing in centrifugal force: the late Hugh Auchincloss Brown, whose initials are the same as the fictional proponent of Eckert's book. In a book called "Cataclysms of the Earth," Brown suggested what is basically the same theory presented in the novel: that massive accumulation of ice at the poles, especially the South Pole, caused the earth to wobble on its axis and then, about every 7,000 years, to "careen." Like the novel, it has some basis in fact. A spokesman at the Scott Polar Research Institute in Cambridge, England--who says "careening" is  impossible -- confirmed last month that the ice does accumulate at the South Pole in massive quantities: 2,000 billion tons a year, enough to build a wall 10 inches thick and half a mile high from New York to California. For Charles Hapgood in New Hampshire, Brown's theory was fascinating. "I spent about 10 years looking into it," he said in a recent interview, "until mathematical calculations proved it impossible." But as his research had raised certain questions in his own mind, Hapgood continued to work on the subject and eventually came up with his own theory, which he outlined in "Earth's Shifting Crust" (Pantheon Books, New York, 1958). Essentially, he said, the earth's crust "slips" over its core, thus periodically changing the positions of the poles. Aware that ideas that deviate from traditional scientific beliefs get short shrift in the scientific community -- as did, for instance, Wegener's theory of continental drift, now widely accepted -- Hapgood took the precaution of submitting his manuscript to a scientist whose views were generally thought to be acceptable: Albert Einstein. Though neither cartographer nor geographer, Einstein read the manuscript, agreed to write the  introduction and said Hapgood's ideas "electrified" him. He also said that if Hapgood's theory "continued to prove itself", it would be "of great importance to everything that is related to the history of the earth's surface." Meanwhile, Hapgood had heard of the Piri Reis map. A U.S. Navy cartographer, engineer and ancient-map specialist--Captain Arlington H. Mallery -- had come across a copy of the map, studied it and said publicly that the map seemed to show Antarctica -- unknown at the time the map was drawn -- and that, furthermore, the coast seemed to have been mapped at a time when it was free of ice, an apparent impossibility. Furthermore, Mallery's opinions had been endorsed by the directors of the astronomical observatories at Boston College and Georgetown University, Daniel Linehan and Francis Heyden. To Hapgood, already caught up in the subject of Antarctica, the questions raised by Mallery and the Piri Reis map were an irresistible challenge. As Antarctica was not discovered until 1820 -- 307 years after Piri Reis drew his map -- how could Piri Reis possibly have included Antarctica -- if he did? And, since Antarctica had, presumably, been covered with ice for millennia, why would he have shown it without ice? And why does the notation on the map read as follows: "There is no trace of cultivation in this country. Everything is desolate, and big snakes are  said to be there. For this reason the Portuguese did not land on these shores, which are said to be very hot"? Hapgood thought that investigation of these ideas would be an interesting challenge for his students. Accordingly, he presented it to them as a class project and began to work with them himself. As the investigation began, Hapgood and his students immediately came across several puzzling facts. One was that, on the Piri Reis map, the mountains in the western region of what is obviously South America seemed to be the Andes. But since Magellan did not find a way around the continent, through the strait named after him, until 1520 -- seven years after the map was finished -- and since Pizarro did not sight the Andes until 1527 -- 14 years afterwards--how could Piri Reis have known about the Andes? The answer, obviously, was that one of Piri Reis' 20-odd source maps must have shown them. But which map? Hapgood concluded it was probably one of the eight maps of the world done in the time of Alexander the Great, or one of the six other "unknown" maps--which meant someone had not only known of the Americas, but had mapped them at least 1,700 years before Columbus. It was possible, of course, that the mountains were not -- and were not supposed to be -- the Andes at all. Still, the map did show them roughly in the right place, and included a drawing of a creature that Kahle had tentatively identified as a llama. As the llama is exclusive to the Andes and was not known in Europe in 1513, when Piri Reis finished his map, Hapgood concluded that the mountains were indeed the Andes. As the study went on, the Hapgood team noticed, toward the south, what looked very much like the Falkland Islands -- even though the Falklands were not discovered until 1592 -- and reasoned that if they were the Falklands, the land south of them would almost surely be the coast of Queen Maud Land -- Antarctica -- not discovered until more than three centuries after the Piri Reis map. As it was this feature that had fascinated Hapgood originally, his team made a particularly careful comparison of "Antarctica" on the Piri Reis map with Antarctica on a modern globe. They concluded that there was "a striking similarity" between the Piri Reis coastline and the Queen Maud Land coast. Later, after a series of complicated calculations, they also came to believe that the Piri Reis map, in that area, was accurate to within 20 miles. In what was a vital aspect of the developing hypotheses, they also concluded that Mallery's "mountains"--the mountains not discovered until this century -- were, on the Piri Reis map, the small cluster of islands shown at the bottom toward the right. According to Hapgood, the "heavy shading of some of the islands" was, in 16th-century map-making techniques, an indication of mountainous terrain. In addition, he said, a seismic profile made by a Norwegian-British-Swedish expedition in 1949 disclosed a range of undersea mountains. Some of these, the Hapgood team concluded, would emerge from the sea as islands if there were no ice cap--another indication that Antarctica had really been explored and mapped earlier, at a time when no ice cap existed. By then, of course, Hapgood and his students were captivated by the mystery of the map. They proceeded cautiously, however, because they knew that many cartographers in ancient times vaguely believed in the existence of a landmass in the southern regions and, with or without evidence, might have added something to their charts out of blind faith -- or even out of a preference for esthetic balance. Modern Map on the Left, Oronteus Finaeus Map on the right Click here to see the various maps mentioned in this article In 1959, however, in the Library of Congress, Hapgood noticed a presumably authentic map that instantly wiped out his doubts: a map of what was almost certainly Antarctica, done in 1531 by the French cartographer Oronce Fine, also known as Oronteus Finaeus. To even the most skeptical, the Oronteus Finaeus map is startling. Although it was printed in a book in 1531 -- and was thus not subject to subsequent amendment--it is remarkably similar to today's maps of Antarctica. Admittedly it is too close to the tip of South America, and it is incorrectly oriented, yet the proportions seem similar, the coastal mountains, found in the 1957 geophysical study, are in roughly the right places and so are many bays and rivers. Furthermore, the shape of South America itself seems right, and the close resemblance between a modern, scientifically exact map of the Ross Sea and Finaeus' unnamed gulf is striking. What is different, however, is that the Oronteus Finaeus map does not seem to show the great shelves of ice that, today, surround the continent, nor the great glaciers that fringe the coastal regions. Instead there seem to be estuaries and inlets, suggesting great rivers. To Hapgood and his team, that meant that at some time in the past the Ross Sea and its coasts -- scene of the November, 1979 air disaster on Mount Erebus--and some of the hinterland of Antarctica were free of ice. It also suggested to Hapgood that since the Antarctic was certainly ice-bound in 1531 -- when Oronteus Finaeus made his map -- Finaeus must have had access to very ancient maps indeed: maps made when Antarctica was largely free of the mile=thick ice cap that buries it today, and presumably has covered it for millennia. Those observations, however, were just the beginning. "We had to have more than a resemblance," Professor Hapgood said recently. The evidence -- "the only evidence"--is in the mathematical calculations by which Hapgood and his team -- with the help of an M.I.T. mathematician -- converted the " rhumb" lines on the map into modern lines of latitude and longitude. This, briefly, involved the assumption that a system of lines of longitude and latitude underlies the network of rhumb lines which radiate from the five wind roses located in the Atlantic. These wind roses lie on the perimeter of a circle whose center would be near Cairo on the missing portion of the map. Hapgood postulated from this that the map was drawn on what is called an "equidistant projection" centered on Cairo. ( The base line is located at the Giza Pyramid ) This conversion required years of trial and error and eventually involved a cartographic unit of the Strategic Air Command (SAC). But the results, Hapgood says, were startling. They seemed to show an accuracy impossible at the time Piri Reis drew the map and inconceivable in the time of Alexander the Great when, presumably, Piri Reis' sources drew their maps. To Professor Hapgood the conversions of the underlying lines of latitude and longitude are vital. "They establish beyond any doubt the extraordinary accuracy of the maps, clearly beyond the capability of any medieval or ancient cartographers known to us." Hapgood and his students also examined the late medieval and early Renaissance maps called "portulans" or "portolanos." These were highly accurate mariners' charts of the Mediterranean area- -sometimes including the Black Sea--made by Portuguese, Venetian, Spanish, Catalan and Arab seamen. They are extremely beautiful maps, but what struck Hapgood was their accuracy. How, Hapgood asked, could medieval sailors, with no navigational aids but the compass have prepared such accurate charts? Hapgood was not the only one -- nor the first -- to have been puzzled by portolano maps. Years before, the Norwegian scholar Nordenskjold -- the leading authority on them -- had shown that all portolanos appear to be based on a single prototype -- that had vanished. But, says Hapgood, Nordenskjold did not check the mathematical foundation and so postulated that the lost prototype was product of classical Greece or Phoenicia, whereas Hapgood's researchers concluded that the Greek geographers, from whom Piri Reis had taken certain basic data, had to have used still other maps as sources because the data on the Greeks' maps was drawn with a precision that predated Greece's own development -- about 200 B.C.--of plane geometry and trigonometry. And without knowledge of geometry and trigonometry, they said, no one could have produced such accurate maps. The matter of accuracy, in fact, is debatable. But according to Hapgood, his examination of one portolano--the Dulcert Portolano of 1339, drawn 153 years before Columbus --  is conclusive proof that the Portolanos, at least, are "scientific products." Although this portolano covers an area measuring 3,000 miles by 1,000 miles, 50 localities in the area are pin-pointed with less than one degree of error in longitude and latitude, as reprojected by Hapgood. The researchers also examined, compared and recalculated the work of numerous geographers from Ptolemy through the Renaissance -- including the first world map made by Mercator, a seminal figure in cartography, and a remarkable map dated 1380 called the "Zeno Map." It seemed to show Greenland too without an ice cap. Thus, gradually, Hapgood, after exhaustive research and imaginative mathematical and cartographic experiments, came to his conclusions and, eventually, published them in a book called "Maps of the Ancient Sea Kings" (Chilton Books, Philadelphia, 1966). Briefly these are the conclusions:    - that the Piri Reis map, the portolano charts and many other ancient maps include information      supposedly unknown in the 16th century and, in some cases, information that was not confirmed      until the middle of this century.    - that the Piri Reis map and other maps were inexplicably accurate, particularly with regard to       longitudes, which neither mariners nor cartographers could calculate until spherical trigonometry       was developed in the 17th and 18th centuries.    - that some civilization or culture still unknown to archeology -- and pre-dating any civilization       known so far -- had mapped North America, China, Greenland, South America and Antarctica       long before the rise of any known civilization -- and at a time when Greenland and Antarctica       were not covered with their millennia-old ice caps.    - that to have done this, the ancient civilization had to have developed astronomy, navigational       instruments -- such as the chronometer -- and mathematics, particularly plane geometry and       trigonometry, long before Greece or any other known civilization.    - that the advanced cartographic knowledge appearing on the Piri Reis map, the Oronteus Finaeus map      and other maps came down in garbled and incomplete fragments that somehow survived the destruction      of the unknown civilization itself and the repeated destruction of such ancient repositories of knowledge      as the library at Alexandria. These hypotheses, obviously, were revolutionary and some reviews of "Maps of the Ancient Sea Kings" were, predictably, skeptical in tone. Yet one American reviewer called it a "seminal book," an English reviewer called it "provocative" and Kenneth R. Stunkel, who challenged the conclusions in Britain's "Geographical Review," admitted that Hapgood's work on ancient maps was ". . . a model of thoroughness and meticulous engagement with a complex and elusive subject." Furthermore, Hapgood, before publishing his book, had submitted it to John K. Wright, director of the American Geographical Society for 11 years. Wright -- a geographer and cartographer -- said that Hapgood "posed hypotheses that cry aloud for further testing." Unfortunately, from Hapgood's point of view, his theories were not tested. Most scholars, in fact, seem to have ignored them. As noted, there is relatively little -- with the exception of Paul Kahle's book -- written on the Piri Reis maps by scholars. This may be because Hapgood himself, quoting Thomas Edison, had said that some problems are too difficult for specialists and must be left to amateurs -- and most scientists took him at his word. They largely ignored him. This was not entirely unexpected. As writer J. Enterline put it, in discussing the response of science to the Hapgood hypotheses, acceptance "engendered the necessity of so many accessory explanations, rationalizations and postulates that it became untenable." But their basis for rejecting it, said Enterline--who was also skeptical -- was not because of any demonstrated counter proof but because it seemed to violate common sense and probability -- which, he added, is also true of modern physics. To put it another way, Hapgood's work simply cannot be lumped with the lunatic fringe and he certainly cannot be held responsible for the "Chariots"-level offshoots that fed on his research. Although unquestionably an amateur theoretician, he did do his homework and had it thoroughly checked by professionals. The U.S. Air Force SAC cartographers, for example, worked with him for two years and fully endorsed his conclusions about Antarctica. Nonetheless, there are serious weaknesses in Hapgood's case. For one thing, Hapgood's theses depend entirely on mathematical projections and logic. While he admittedly reasons carefully from observation to conclusion--and had his calculations done by an M.I.T. mathematician -- he obviously cannot produce any of the "advanced" maps or display a single artifact from the "lost"  civilization that supposedly mapped the Americas and Antarctica. For another, he may not have accorded enough importance, at least in the Caribbean portions of the Piri Reis map, to the Christopher Columbus map -- as a close examination of the Piri Reis map may show. Lastly, he was led by his own logic into postulating an ice-free Antarctic -- which conflicts totally with accepted geological theory that says the Antarctic ice cap has been in place for 50 million years. There are other arguments too. One is that many place names on the map, written in the Turco-Arabic script, are clearly transliterations of the Portuguese and Spanish. If, as the Hapgood hypotheses suggest, Piri Reis used maps drawn by ancient cartographers, why don't the place names at least reflect their language? The most compelling arguments against the Hapgood hypotheses, however, concern the Andes and--above all -- Antarctica, both vital to Hapgood's conclusions. Is the chain of mountains to the left of the map really the Andes? Is the coastline at the bottom really Antarctica? Are there any mountains shown there? And is Antarctica free of ice? A cursory examination would certainly suggest that the mountains are the Andes; they are the most striking topographical feature on the map. But beside the mountains there is an inscription that doesn't quite fit into Hapgood's scenario. It reads: "In the mountains of this territory were creatures like this, and human beings came out on the seacoast. . ." Assuming the inscription refers to the eastern coast, this means that "to come out on the seacoast," those "human beings" would have had to walk all the way from, say, Peru, rather than from one of the ranges near the Brazilian coast. And as to the llama, is it really a llama? The animal shown on the map definitely has horns and the llama definitely does not. The reference, of course, might have been to the Pacific coast. But that also poses an awkward problem--as a look at the map suggests. Hapgood assumed that the western base of the mountain chain coincided with the Pacific coast of South America. If so, Hapgood is correct that the west coast, the Pacific and the Andes must have been known before Balboa and Magellan. And thus those "human beings" could have come down from the Andes. Unfortunately the heavy black line to the south of the mountains and the reddish line at the base of the mountains probably do not indicate the west coast. For one thing, the long inscription covers terra incognita--"unknown land" -- and for another, neither the Pacific Ocean nor the Strait of Magellan are shown. Is it reasonable to suppose that the advanced mariners of ancient times could locate the Andes and miss the Pacific Ocean? A similar argument applies to the section of coast which by rights should correspond with the Isthmus of Panama, Central American, the Gulf of Mexico and Florida. Even allowing for the necessary distortions that Hapgood's "equidistant projection" would entail, this section of coast bears only the most tenuous relationship to reality -- and raises still another doubt. Would Hapgood's hypothetical, highly advanced civilization -- capable of sailing to the New World and mapping it -- have done such an  incredibly bad job? The same question applies to the coast of South America where -- as Hapgood admits -- his advanced cartographers lost 900 miles of coastline. As a look at the map will show, the coast, below the Rio de la Plata, simply turns east and becomes, according to Hapgood, Antarctica. This part of the Antarctica hypothesis--the key part--is actually the weakest. First, the hypothetical cartographers left out the Strait of Magellan and Cape Horn. Next, they connected the  coastline of "Antarctica" to South America and extended it eastward. There is, admittedly, a resemblance between the Piri Reis "Antarctic" coast and modern maps of the area. But the resemblance is slight. Indeed if this section of the map were to run vertically -- that is, to the south -- it would bear a much closer resemblance to the east coast of South America and could thus restore some of the missing 900 miles. This is by no means impossible: some of the more distinctive coastal features of the Piri Reis' "Antarctica" do jibe remarkably well with those on a modern map of South America. But if it were true, "Antarctica" would not be Antarctica after all; it would be South America --  which, of course, was never covered with ice -- and the animals drawn on the map would not be in an ice-free Antarctica, but in South America. Last--and a key point -- the famous "mountains" in Antarctica that so excited Mallery and Hapgood, and were presumably "clearly indicated," appear as islands, not mountains. On the other hand, some of the objections are themselves open to debate and Hapgood himself anticipated and answered many of them. To start with, Hapgood and his advocates knew full well that to suggest a "lost world," with its echoes of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and subsequent science-fiction elaborations, might well evoke merciless public scorn from scholars and scientists--as the writings of the late Immanuel Velikovsky had in the 1950's and as "Chariots of the Gods" did in 1968. The existence of this "lost civilization," after all, could only be inferred; there were no artifacts. Hapgood, therefore, pointed out in "Maps of the Ancient Sea Kings" that civilizations have vanished before. No one knew where Sumer, Akkad, Nineveh and Babylon were until 19th-century archeologists dug them up. And as late as 1970 -- only ten years ago -- no one even suspected the existence of a civilization called Ebla. It had existed. It was real. But it vanished without a trace. Why then, argue Hapgood advocates, couldn't there have been other civilizations that vanished? The same is true of Hapgood's unspecified advanced technology. Greek fire -- something like napalm -- was developed in the ninth century but its composition has never been duplicated. Arab scientists of the Golden Age were able to perform delicate eye surgery -- using advanced instruments -- but these skills were later lost. And in 1900, according to "Scientific American," archeologists discovered an astoundingly advanced gearing system in a Greek navigational instrument. It dated back to 65 B.C. and its existence had never been suspected. Hapgood addressed more specific criticisms too. He had not overlooked the fact that on the map the Andes seemed to be in the center of South America, nor ignored the possibility that, maybe, they were mountains on the east coast drawn out of proportion, or drawn on the basis of information, rather than observation -- or even drawn in to account for the great rivers emptying into the sea. And his answer is persuasive: could Piri Reis, entirely by chance, have placed a range of enormous mountains in approximately the same place where there is a range of enormous mountains? Furthermore, there is the notation on the Piri Reis map: "The gold mines are endless." Doesn't this suggest Peru, which is rich in gold? With regard to Antarctica, there is also the inscription on "Antarctica" describing night "two hours" long -- which does suggest Antarctic latitudes. There is, moreover, the perplexing problem of the Oronteus Finaeus map. Even if Piri Reis' "Antarctica" turns out to be  South America -- drawn horizontally -- or even Australia, the Finnaeus "Antarctica" is surely Antarctica and his map was also drawn in the 16th century: 1531. Where did Oronteus Finaeus get his far more detailed and accurate information? and why does Finaeus also show Antarctica without an ice cap? Furthermore, the Hapgood team identified 50 geographical points on the Finaeus map, as re-projected, whose latitudes and longitudes were located quite accurately in latitude and longitude, some of them quite close to the pole. "The mathematical probability against this being accidental," says Hapgood, "is astronomical." There are other factors too. The cartography of the Age of Discovery, for instance, often seems to have been independent of the voyages themselves; that is certain early maps of America contain features before their supposed date of discovery. The most notable example of this is the map of America made by Glareanus, a famous Swiss poet, mathematician and theoretical geographer, in the year 1510. This map, which was probably based on the 1504 de Canerio map, clearly shows the west coast of  America 12 years before Magellan passed through the strait that bears his name. In other words, Piri Reis was not the only one to include anachronous information. The map of Glareanus, furthermore, was reproduced in Johannes de Stobnicza's famous 1512 Cracow edition of Ptolemy and is unquestionably similar to the map of Piri Reis. Did Piri Reis have a copy of this early printed edition of Ptolemy before him  when he drew his map? Is this what Piri Reis meant by "maps drawn in the time of Alexander the Great"? Again, this is plausible, since to the Arabs -- and later the Ottomans--the second century (A.D.) geographer Ptolemy was often confused with the earlier General Ptolemy -- Alexander's general, Ptolemy I, who became king in Egypt in the fourth century B.C. and was an ancestor of Cleopatra. Still, where did de Canerio and Glareanus get their information? The subject of the Piri Reis map, obviously, is enormously complex--as well as a great deal of fun. It involves Christopher Columbus, his sources of information, his conclusions and even  his motives. It involves two Ottoman naval captains and 20 unknown or vaguely identified maps. It involves the portolano charts that seem to be based on a single lost source, the Zeno map -- with an ice-free Greenland -- and the Finaeus map, possibly the most inexplicable of all. It involves, in sum, questions that are not only fascinating but, so far, unanswered--except by Charles Hapgood. The Hapgood hypotheses, therefore, cannot be just dismissed - - if only because it is indisputable that famous maps known to have existed have been lost. None of the maps from the classical world, in fact, have survived. The maps accompanying Ptolemy's great work on geography, for example, were quickly lost and the earliest maps based upon his test were drawn 1,000 years after he wrote. Marinus of Tyre, precursor of Ptolemy, is a shadowy figure whose works have perished. And the great library at Alexandria, the chief depository of classical learning, was repeatedly destroyed. It is reliably reported by an Arab author, moreover, that a globe of the world by Ptolemy -- the geographer -- existed in Cairo in the 14th century. Arabic literature contains numerous tantalizing mentions of "lost maps." The 10th century author Ibn Nadim, for example, speaks of a Persian map of the world drawn on silk in colored paints -- conceivably a copy of a classical map, but in any case lost to history. As maps by their nature are perishable -- even maps by such well-known and relatively recent cartographers as Mercator are extremely rare--is it so improbable that Hapgood's mysterious maps did exist and did vanish? Admittedly, the answer of many cartographers and historians would be, yes it is improbable. The Hapgood hypotheses, after all, challenge basic and long-standing historical and geological premises. But Hapgood, now retired and living in Florida, remains confident that his theories will be accepted eventually. "After all," he said, "they haven't even been examined yet." Hapgood, furthermore, is still working on his hypotheses. Last year he finished revisions of both books and one of them, "Sea Kings," was published by E.P. Dutton & Company, New York and by Turnstone Books, London, in October. The other will be published this year. Beyond that, however, he has no plans to fight for either attention or acceptance. "I will not wear myself out trying to persuade people with pre-fixed ideas. My books speak for themselves and someday, I think, they will be acknowledged." It is unlikely, of course, that such acknowledgement will be forthcoming soon, if ever; as the supplementary articles suggest, there could be other explanations. Furthermore, the work of an obscure 16th-century Ottoman admiral does not command a high priority on science's crowded calendars. But it is not impossible either. Increasingly, scientific writers and critics are beginning to re-examine some of the traditional premises and several, as recently as last year, have openly objected to the kind of cool dismissal that the Hapgood theories received on publication. In the magazine "New Scientist," for example, several articles in 1979 focused on what they call "deviant science" and one critic said that it is from deviant science "That seminal ideas sometimes arise, later to be accepted as scientific orthodoxy." One example is the highly controversial Velikovsky--who died just two months ago. In addition to other, admittedly fanciful theories, Velikovsky hypothesized that Venus and Mars had once disturbed the rotation of the earth on its axis; he was not only belittled but threatened. Yet, according to the "Encyclopaedia Britannica," space probes have subsequently verified some details of his theory. Verification of the Hapgood hypotheses of course, would require highly persuasive evidence. As a "New Scientist" writer quoted, "extraordinary claims demand extraordinary proof," and in the case of Professor Hapgood that means location of the "lost" civilization or at least one of the "advanced" source maps presumably use by Piri Reis. But this, says Hapgood, is not impossible. Somewhere, he  thinks, those source maps exist: hidden, perhaps, amid the massive collections of documents crammed into museums and archives in Istanbul, many still unexamined. No search for the source has ever been made, Hapgood says, but when there is "the result might be a discovery of vast importance." His view, given the reception of his hypotheses, is natural. But it is by no means implausible. In 1955, a cartographer named M. Destombes announced the discovery of Ferdinand Magellan's own chart of his epochal circumnavigation of the world. No one had known it existed, but Destombes found it--in the archives of Istanbul. "Ferdinand Magellan: The greatest voyager of them all" by: Raymond Schuessler in: "Sea Frontiers" (Sep-Oct 1984) Ferdinand Magellan, initiator and leader of the first expedition to circumnavigate the globe, in 1519-22, never received the acclaim he deserved for his great feat. Compared to Columbus's voyage of 8,000 miles over the relatively quiet Atlantic, Magellan's expedition of 42,000 miles -- 22,000 of them over waters no white man had ever seen -- was an achievement without parallel in an era of fragile wooden ships. Few voyages have been so filled with intrigue, treachery, mutiny, murder, scurvy, starvation, and death. Only a lone, bedraggled ship out of a fleet of five managed to complete the journey. The Log of Magellan's Secretary Pigafetta belonged to the only 18 of 270 men of the Magellan expedition who survived. Magellan and his friend the astronomer Ruy de Falero proposed to King Charles V (of Spain) that a westward voyage around the tip of South America would take them to the Moluccas (spice-rich islands) and avoid the Portuguese (with whom they were competing fiercely). The voyage began September 8, 1519, and lasted until September 6, 1522 (almost 3 years). Magellan sailed from Seville, Spain, with five ships, the Trinidad, San Antonio, Concepcion, Victoria, and Santiago. Three years later, only one ship (the Victoria) made it back to Seville, carrying only 18 of the original 270 crew members. Magellan was killed towards the end of the voyage, in the Philippines, during a battle with the natives. The Basque navigator Juan Sebastián de Elcano (del Cano) completed the trip. He was the first explorer to lead an expedition around the world. Early Life Magellan's parents died when he was only 10 years old. At the age of 12, he was appointed as the queen�s messenger in the royal court. Young boys were appointed as messenger as a source of education. At the court, the young Magellan learned about many famous explorers and the most important information about navigating ships. First Expedition Magellan's first time at sea was in 1505 when he was 25 years old. He sailed with Francisco de Almedia, Portugal�s first admiral, and his fleet. In 1511, he went on an expedition to conquer Melaka. After their victory, a Portuguese fleet sailed to the Spice Islands (also known as the Moluccas Islands). Portugal claimed the islands at this time. One of Magellan's close friends, Francisco Serrao, went on the voyage and wrote to him. In his letters he described the route and the island of Ternate. Planning for a Long Trip Serrao�s letters helped build in Magellan's mind the location of the Spice Islands, which later became the destination for yhe great voyage. Magellan asked the King of Portugal to support the journey, but was refused. Magellan then begged the King of Spain to support the journey. Magellan easily convinced the teenaged Spanish king, Charles I (also known as the Holy Roman emperor Charles V) that at least some of the Spice Islands lay in the Spanish half of the undiscovered world. He was interested in the plan since Spain was looking for a better sea route to Asia than the Portuguese route around the southern tip of Africa. It was going to be hard to find sailors, though. None of the Spanish sailors wanted to sail with Magellan because he was Portuguese. He was forced to take anybody who signed on, whether they were good seamen or not. Parts of the crew were prisoners, released from jail in return for sailing with him. Journey Around the World In September of 1519, Magellan's crew and he said their prayers and set sail for southern Spain with five ships  -- the Santiago, the San Antonio, the Conception, the Trinidad, and the Victoria. At first, all went well. The small fleet sailed across the Atlantic Ocean and reached South America. Stocking up with goods and sailing down the coastline they searched for a passage through this great continent. They were unable to find a route through South America! They sailed further and further south, sailing into every river and bay they came upon. The weather was getting colder, and the crew was were running out of supplies. The weather was so bad, the fleet decided to spend the winter in Patagonia. The area where they settled on March 31, 1520, was called San Julian. When Magellan reached Patagonia (present-day Argentina), another mutiny was attempted. Cartegena, released by captain Mendoza, attempted once again to take over the fleet and have Magellan killed. The Portuguese explorer was able to put down the rebellion by marooning Cartegena in the barren Patagonia, imprisoning some, and having Quesada and other rebels executed. The men who started the mutiny were hanged. During the cold summer months, Magellan sent the Santiago on a reconnaissance mission down the coast to look for a passage to the other side of the continent. Unfortunately in May, the Santiago wrecked in rough seas. In the latter half of August, Magellan decided it was time to move the remaining four ships south to look for a passage. Finally in October of 1520 the fleet sighted a strait and started through it. Magellan named it the strait of All Saints, but it later was named after him. The strait was a tricky passage that took the fleet 38 days to pass through. While sailing at night, the crew saw countless fires from distant Indian camps. They called the land Tierra del Fuego (land of fire). During the passage, the captain of the San Antonio sailed his ship back toward Spain, taking with him most of the fleet's provisions. The loss of the San Antonio was a severe blow to the men on the remaining ships. They had to double their efforts to hunt game and fish to keep from starving. They finally arrived at the ocean that Balboa had discovered several years before. It was named the Pacific Ocean because of its calm waters. They sailing for weeks across this ocean with no sign of land. Magellan mistakenly thought the Spice Islands were a short voyage away. He had no idea of the immense size of the ocean and thought he could cross it in two to three days. The voyage took approximately four months. The drinking water stunk and started to get slimy. The crew was forced to eat rats! Many of the crew suffered from scurvy. One of the other captains deserted and sailed the San Antonio back to Spain. In March of 1521, Magellan arrived in Guam, an island in the Pacific. From there, they headed for the Moluccas. Magellan never made it to the Spice Islands. He was caught in a war in the Philippine islands. The crew faced a group of natives who killed Magellan with a poisoned arrow in the foot and a spear through the heart. After Magellan died, Sebastian del Cano took over the remaining three ships and 115 survivors. Because there were not enough men to crew three ships, del Cano had the Concepcion burned. Magellan's body was left behind. Only two ships actually reached the Spice Islands because the Santiago was sunk in a storm. The two remaining ships sailed from the Philippines on May 1 and made it to the Moluccas (Spice Islands) in November. Both ships loaded with valuable spices. . The crew loaded both ships with a rich cargo and headed for Spain. On the way home, the Portuguese who had claimed the Spice Islands captured the Trinidad. The Victoria was the only ship to make it safely back to Spain. Out of the five ships that began the journey, only one ship made the voyage around the world. Out of 250 men, only 18 survived�Magellan was not one of them. The Log - Pg 333 Records of the Journey: Amoretti, Primo viaggio intorno al globo terracqueo (Milan, 1800) (a publication of the original MSS. of Pigafetta's account, preserved in the Ambrosian Library, Milan, the Bibl. Nationale, Paris, and T. Fitzroy-Fenwick's -- formerly Sir T. Philipps's -- library, Cheltenham); Pigafetta, tr. and ed. Robertson, Magellan's Voyage around the World, Original and Complete Text of the Oldest and Best MS. (the Ambrosian MS. of Milan of the early sixteenth century. Italian text with page for page of English and notes) (Cleveland, Ohio, 1905); Nunhez de Carvalho in Noticias para la historia e geographia das nacoes ultramarinas (6 vols., Lisbon, 1831), gives an extract from the diary of another member of the expedition, Mestro Bautista; Burck, Magellan oder erste Reise um die Erde (Leipzig, 1844); Barras Arama, Vida y viajes de Magellanes (Santiago, 1864); Stanley, The First Voyage Round the World (London, 1874); Wieser, Magalhaesstrasse u. austral-Continent (Innsbruck, 1881); Guillemard, Life of Ferdinand Magellan (London, 1890); Butterworth, The Story of Magellan and the Discovery of the Philippines (New Your, 1988); Kolliker, Die erste Umsegelung der Erde durch Fernando de Magellanes und Juan Sebastian del Cano, 1519-1522 Munich, 1908). . From: http://www.nmm.ac.uk/education/fact_cabot.html John Cabot (c1450-1498) was an experienced Italian seafarer who came to live in England during the reign of Henry VII. In 1497 he sailed west from Bristol hoping to find a shorter route to Asia, a land believed to be rich in gold, gems and other luxuries. After a month, he discovered an unknown land – he called it 'new found land', today still known as Newfoundland in Canada. His son, Sebastian Cabot, may also have been on this voyage. Why did John Cabot come to England? Probably born in Genoa around 1450, and later a citizen of Venice, Cabot's Italian name was Giovanni Caboto. He had read of fabulous Chinese cities in the writings of Marco Polo and wanted to see them for himself. He hoped to reach them by sailing west, across the Atlantic. Like Christopher Columbus, who also planned to sail west, Cabot found it very difficult to convince rich backers to pay for the ships he needed to test out his ideas about the world. After failing to persuade the royal courts of Europe, he decided to come to England. He arrived with his family in 1484, to try to persuade merchants in Bristol to pay for his planned voyage. Before his voyage set off, Cabot heard the news that Columbus had sailed west across the Atlantic and reached land. At the time, everyone believed that this land was the Indies, or Spice Islands. Why did King Henry VII agree to help to pay for Cabot's expedition? If Cabot was proved right about the new route, he would not be the only one to become rich. The king would also take his share. Everybody believed that Cathay and Cipangu (China and Japan) were rich in gold, gems, spices and silks. If Asia had been where Cabot thought it was, it would have made England the greatest trading centre in the world for goods from the east. The king wrote that he gave his permission to his 'well-beloved John Cabot......to seeke out, discover and finde whatsoever isles, countries, regions or provinces......which before this time have been unknown to all Christians.' What did Cabot find on his voyage? John Cabot's ship, the Mathew, sailed from Bristol with a crew of eighteen in 1497. After a month at sea, he landed and took the area in the name of King Henry VII. The king had agreed to his voyage and helped to pay for it. Cabot had landed on one of the northern capes of Newfoundland. His sailors were able to catch huge numbers of cod simply by dipping baskets into the water. Cabot was rewarded with the sum of £10 by the king, for discovering a new island off the coast of China! The king would have been far more generous if Cabot had brought home spices. How did John Cabot die? In 1498, John Cabot was given permission by Henry VII to take ships on a new expedition to continue west from the point he had reached on his first voyage. The aim was to discover Japan. Cabot made a visit to Spain and Portugal to try to recruit men who had sailed with Columbus, but without much success. He set out from Bristol with 300 men in May 1498. The five ships carried supplies for a year's travelling. Cabot and his crews were never heard of again EVIDENCE OF GLOBAL WARMING Satellite Image Atlas of Glaciers of the World A new study by NASA's Goddard Institute found Greenland glaciers appear to be spewing icebergs into the ocean faster than in the past. The finding was unexpected, and raises the possiblity that global sea levels, already projected to rise 20 inches next century, could increase even faster. Predictions that global warming will be greatest in the polar regions are now being borne out. Arctic sea ice has been shrinking by 3% each decade since 1970. Several of the years with the smallest sea ice coverage were in the 1990s. Around the Antarctic Peninsula, extensive sea ice formed four winters out of every five in the mid-century. Since the 1970s that dropped to 1-2 winters out of five. Several Peninsula ice shelves, which attach to the continent but stretch into the sea, are in retreat. Some of the most dramatic losses came in 1998, when around 2,000 square miles calved into icebergs. The loss in one year equaled the average of 10-15. The Larsen A ice shelf, after years of slowly melting away, suddenly disintegrated in 1995. Scientists have now mounted a death watch for Larsen B and Wilkens, together three times larger than Delaware. Since ice shelves already displace water, the loss will not add to rising ocean levels. But melting northern tundra could have a devastating global effect. Carbon in tundra soils, equal to one-third that in the atmosphere, could be released. A Prophecy by Edgar Cayce Like many glaciers in this part of the Antarctic, the Marr has been retreating at a surprising rate over the past quarter century. Every year, more rock emerges from beneath the melting wall of ice behind Palmer Station, a 40-man United States research station run by the National Science Foundation. Scientists arriving after a year's absence are surprised to find new beaches, outcroppings, even islands that had been hidden for thousands of years under the ice. The Antarctic Peninsula region - a thousand-mile arm of glaciated land and islands reaching northward toward the tip of South America - has seen average temperatures increase by almost 5 degrees F. in the last 50 years. As the region warms, glaciers have retreated, and floating ice shelves that may have formed many thousands of years ago have collapsed. Glaciologists ponder the possible future ramifications for even larger ice formations to the south. Collapse would raise world sea levels by as much as 18 feet. Rodolfo del Valle, director of geoscience at the Argentine Antarctic Institute in Buenos Aires, knows just how dramatic climate change can be. In 1995, he and his colleagues were at their base camp on a rocky outcropping in the midst of the Larsen-A Ice Shelf, a floating ice sheet the size of Rhode Island and 500 feet thick. They used the shelf as a sort of highway, driving snow machines between geological sites on the peninsula. One day, the shelf collapsed with a thunderous roar. In a mere two hours, the Argentine team found themselves standing not on a rocky outcropping, but on an island surrounded by open water and enormous icebergs. "I felt a sadness, a pain in my heart for the loss of a place that had become like a home to me," del Valle recalls. "I've experienced strong earthquakes on land, but this was different. After an earthquake something remains. But not with the ice shelf - it was completely destroyed." The much smaller Wordie ice shelf disappeared in the late 1980s. Cracks have formed in the Larsen-B shelf - now the northernmost shelf on the continent - and experts believe it could break up at any time. From: http://www.khouse.org/articles/currentevents/19971201-94.html Whether the earth is warming or cooling depends on when you begin making measurements. Over the last two decades, satellite sensors show that the earth has been cooling. If measurements begin in 1850, at the end of the little ice age and the point alarmists love to start their charts, the earth has heated about 1 degree C. For the last couple of decades, we have had satellite readings of both land and sea temperatures. Prior to that, for about a century or so, temperature readings were confined mostly to land. Prior to that, scientists rely on historical data. From about 800 a.d. to 1200 a.d., the earth's average climate was warmer than it is today-at least 1 degree C warmer-the same amount everyone is panicked about. It was the period when Vikings crossed the oceans in open boats without cabins and were able to settle and raise crops in Greenland, because it wasn't covered with a sheet of ice. Note that the oceans didn't flood the continents. Scientists refer to this period of time as the "climactic optimum"-an optimum and not a disaster! From 1200 a.d. onward, the earth began to cool. The period between 1450 and 1850 is the period scientists refer to as the "little ice age." The Vikings had to abandon Greenland since it became covered with perpetual ice. The most severe storms of history set in during this time and are related to global cooling rather than global warming. The worst storms on record in the North Sea occurred during this time. Storms in 1421 and 1446 claimed 100,000 lives while a storm in 1570 claimed over 400,000. Only two of the 20 deadliest storms occurred since 1962 and none of them occurred in the 1980s or 1990s, when we were first warned about the global warming "crisis." By 1850, the cooling cycle reversed and the earth began warming to the temperature norms we see today. It is clear the earth passes through normal long-term cycles, attributed to sunspot cycles and other factors. Our current fluctuations are normal variations not caused by human activity. Is There a Consensus? There is still much debate and absolutely no consensus among scientists about global warming, no matter how hard President Clinton tries to tell us otherwise. In 1992, over 400 scientists from around the world signed the Heidelberg Appeal prior to the UNCED conference in Rio. They expressed their doubts about global warming and asked the delegates not to bind the world to any radical treaties based on global warming. Today scientists agreeing with the Heidelberg Appeal number over 4,000! The UN's IPCC report on climate change put together by atmospheric scientists meeting in Bonn, Germany last year had significant sections by atmospheric scientists who said there is not enough data to suggest that man is radically altering the temperature on the planet. When the report was published, however, the United Nations had systematically removed that information in over a dozen pages to eliminate the appearance of disagreement. The scientists were outraged at politics hijacking science by means of fraud. But you'll still hear global warming buffs cite the UN report as saying that the scientists all agree that global warming is a fact. That's an outright lie and they know it. Does CO2 Cause Global Warming? The planet's temperature increased 1.5 degrees C since the mid 19th century, two-thirds of which occurred before 1940, when carbon dioxide emissions by humans were minimal. Since 1979, carbon dioxide emissions from fossil fuels have risen 19%; yet the planet cooled 0.09 degree C during that period. One must seriously ask how the earth's temperature rose before human-caused CO2 was put into the atmosphere? This is a case of an effect coming before the cause. The chief hothouse gas is water vapor-not carbon dioxide or methane. It accounts for over 90% of global heat retention. Currently, human activity puts about 6 billion tons of CO2 into the atmosphere per year. Non-human activity, mostly volcanoes, accounts for about 200 billion tons. Human activity, then, constitutes 2-3% of carbon dioxide, which itself is less than 10% of the total. As professor of physics at Purdue University L. van Zandt said in the National Review: Human activity, carried out at the present rate indefinitely (more than 12 years) cannot possibly account for more than 6 per cent of the observed change in CO2 levels. Entirely shutting off civilization-or even killing everybody-could only have a tiny effect on global warming, if there is any such thing.1 He went on to say: Why do all these supposedly educated, supposedly sane people want to end civilization? Since humanity can't possibly be causing the CO2 level to go up, isn't it time to start wondering about what is? . North Pole faces a major meltdown Norwegian experts say the ice cap could disappear in summer within half century Tuesday, July 11, 2000 By WALTER GIBB THE NEW YORK TIMES OSLO, Norway -- The mythic icescape that stretches south in all directions from the North Pole is melting so fast that Norwegian scientists say it could disappear entirely each summer beginning in just 50 years, radically altering the Earth's environment, the global economy and the human imagination. Climatologists have warned for a decade that the northern ice cap is retreating. But researchers at the University of Bergen's Nansen Environmental and Remote Sensing Center are apparently the first to predict the disorienting specter of a watery North Pole open to cruise ships and the Polar Bear Swim Club within the lives of today's young people. ) "The changes we've seen have been much faster and more dramatic than most people imagine," said Tore Furevik, 31, a polar researcher and co-author of the article "Toward an Ice-Free Arctic?" in the latest issue of the Norwegian science journal Cicerone. Not all ice specialists agree with Furevik, but his 50-year projection is supported by the director of the Bergen research center, Professor Ola Johannessen, whose own study will appear in the fall issue of Science Progress, a British journal. Johannessen, 61, said the pull-back and thinning of Arctic sea ice have outstripped the theoretical effect of global warming from greenhouse gases by a factor of three. "The greenhouse is here, no doubt about it, but there is more to it," he said, speculating that a conjunction of long-term oscillations in North Atlantic air pressure have exacerbated the Arctic meltdown. If so, he said, the cycles will eventually decouple and the ice, or what's left of it, could regain stability. Since 1978, the coverage of Arctic sea ice in winter has decreased by 6 percent, an area the size of Texas, according to satellite pictures. As for average ice thickness in late summer, submarine sonar measurements since the 1950s have shown a decline to 5.9 feet from 10.2 feet, or 42 percent. The Norwegian countdown to zero ice is based partly on extrapolation of the submarine data and partly on Johannessen's discovery last year that hard-core, year-round ice is shrinking twice as fast as the overall winter perimeter. While an ice-free Arctic Ocean would likely disrupt the global environment, researchers said, it could have positive economic aspects. It could shorten shipping routes, for example, and expand the range of offshore oil drillers. Rich new fishing and aquaculture zones would likely appear, though established fisheries to the south could decline. Dr. Drew Rothrock, an oceanographer at the University of Washington's Polar Science Center who has studied sea ice for decades, agreed that Arctic sea ice is on a trajectory to disappear in 50 years. But, he added, that does not mean it will continue on that path. He said the ice was being expelled from the Arctic by abnormally strong winds before it could achieve its accustomed thickness. Data compiled by Rothrock and two colleagues suggest that sea ice thickness has more to do with localized wind and weather than with overall climate change. "I think it is quite possible that in the next 10 years we will see the winds revert to a more historical pattern, so that the ice begins to reside longer in the Arctic and thicken up again," Rothrock said. "I would be cautious about predicting doom." Unlike the ice in a pond, Arctic sea ice consists of independent floes of varying age that glom together, pull apart or pile up on one another in reaction to wind and currents. In winter, it extends as far south as Hudson Bay in Canada. By late summer it pulls back to the roughly circular Arctic basin. The seeming permanence and impregnability of the northern icescape have given it almost continental status in the human imagination. As a mythic anchor point, the North Pole, home of Santa Claus, has few geographic rivals. The ancient Greeks and 19th century theosophists believed humanity originated there. "The North Pole is the strongest symbol of mankind's struggle against, and with, nature," said the Norwegian adventurer Boerge Ousland, the first man to ski there alone without aerial reprovisioning, in 1994. "If the ice disappears, well, I just can't imagine it." The sea ice is thickest above North America, where Canadian islands and the fingers of northern Greenland act as a sieve in the current. As the floes stack up there, they create pressure ridges up to 40 feet high. By contrast, a branch of the warm-water Gulf Stream keeps Norway's north coast ice-free. That warm flow continues under the ice along most of the northern Siberian coast. If the trend continues, it is there, the Eurasian Arctic, that the first significant opening of ice-clogged water is expected. Russia, Scandinavia and Japan are laying plans. Government ministers and shipping executives met in Oslo last fall and declared that "considerable profit potential" existed for a shipping lane linking Western Europe and Asia across the mellowing Arctic. Ships using the Arctic to move cargo from Hamburg to Yokohama would save about 4,800 miles compared with today's route through the Suez Canal. Receding ice could open the way for a parade of cargo ships. Ivan Ivanov, leader of an Arctic shipping demonstration project carried out by Finland's Fortum energy company, said the Russian Arctic shelf contains three times the oil of Saudi Arabia. Polar bears and other creatures face a bleak future if their habitat keeps liquefying. So do Eskimo populations that rely on the ice for game such as seals and walruses. Alan Springer, a wildlife specialist at the University of Alaska in Fairbanks, said Alaska's 250,000 walruses seem to have suffered weight loss and stress from retraction of the pack ice they need for resting and raising pups. "The sea ice in summer has been receding so far north that it carries the walruses into very deep water, far from their optimal feeding ground," Springer said. Furevik, the Norwegian researcher, said he could foresee ice-dwelling mammals making "a desperate last stand" north of Greenland, where he believes the final patch of Arctic sea ice will linger before vanishing into the waves in about 2050. P-I reporter Tom Paulson contributed to this report. © 2000 The New York Times. All rights reserved. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ NASA confirms Greenland ice cap melting The Greenland ice cap is thinning around the edges and slightly thickening in the center. Click on this map to see a larger version July 20, 2000 (CNN) -- An ice cap covering much of Greenland is shrinking rapidly and releasing enough water to raise sea levels, according to a report released Thursday. NASA scientists flew over Greenland in 1993 and 1994, and again in 1998 and 1999, using airborne lasers to measure the thickness of the ice sheet, which covers nearly 85 percent of the island. Their research shows it is thinning around the edges at a rate of about three feet (1 meter) a year. Ice at the center of Greenland is becoming slightly thicker. But as it turns out, that progression is the result of weather changes related to the loss of ice over the remainder of the island, NASA scientists said. After Antarctica, Greenland's ice cap contains the second largest mass of frozen freshwater in the world. The Arctic island has a net loss of about 50 billion gallons (227 billion liters) of ice each year, which can cause a measurable rise in sea levels. CNN's David George reports NASA studies show the Greenland ice cap is shrinking a quarter-inch per year. Is the thinning ice cap evidence of global warming? In one lifetime, the rise would be nearly 1 centimeter (0.4 inches), if the rate were to remain the same, according to NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center, which coordinated the study research. Should that rate increase, or other factors push the level higher, the result could prove disastrous. "When you consider a flat beach, an inch in sea level rise covers a large horizontal distance," said NASA researcher Waleed Abdalati. "There are instances where there are large storm events because the water's closer to the land. So it's something to be studied. It's something to be considered." The NASA report, published in the July 21 issue of Science, does not mention global warming. But some scientists note that the massive patches of ice near the North and South Pole reflect sunlight back into space, helping regulate the temperature of the Earth. Correspondent David George contributed to this report. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Scientists Say North Pole�s Icecap Is Melting A mile-long stretch of water on the North Pole was recently discovered by a group of scientists and tourists. By Dan Harris N E W Y O R K, Aug. 20, 2000 — On a recent expedition from Norway to the North Pole, Paleontologist Malcolm McKenna, along with a group of scientists and tourists, found about a mile of open water right on the earth�s crown. New evidence for global warming. McKenna, a paleontologist at the American Museum of Natural History who has studied global warming, immediately started taking pictures to record what he says should be a serious wake-up call. �I think that those who think that global warming is not occurring should pay at least a little closer attention to this single occurrence,� he cautions. Was It the Wind? What McKenna and the others saw, however, may have been just an aberration. Doug Martinson, oceanography professor at the Lamont-Doherty Observatory of Columbia University, thinks that the wind most likely broke the ice apart. But Martinson says that regardless of the cause, the bigger issue is that the ice there is 40 percent thinner than it was in the 1950s. He believes that that the North Pole has been warming up at an alarming rate, which could have serious environmental ramifications. �The ice really is thinning dramatically,� he says. �It�s probably prudent of us to start to pay attention and just really realize that we�re altering the entire global climate, and it could have all sorts of implications to our daily lives and activities that we haven�t anticipated yet.� Martinson asserts that global warming could change our weather patterns, affecting agriculture, water management, and energy management. Indeed, the Earth�s average surface temperature has risen by about 1 degree in the past 100 years, and the rate has increased in the last quarter century. By comparison, the world is only 5 to 9 degrees warmer than it was in the last Ice Age, 18,000 to 20,000 years ago. Water Shouldn�t Cause Concern Skeptics of global warming say the climate on the North Pole is always fluctuating, and that open water should not be a cause for concern. �It�s fashionable these days to blame everything on global warming, especially man-made global warming,� says Fred Singer, professor emeritus at the University of Virginia and founder of the Science & Environmental Policy Project. �But I�m afraid the evidence doesn�t point in that direction.� Malcolm McKenna, however, remains shocked by what he saw. He warns we should not ignore the fact that, as he wryly puts it, �Santa�s Workshop is now underwater.� ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ NORTH POLE IS MELTING -- WELL, IT'S MORE COMPLICATED by Doug O'harra Daily News Reporter (Published September 4, 2000) "The North Pole is melting" declared the lead story in The New York Times two weeks ago. In a story that surprised readers across the nation, the Times reported that "an ice-free patch of ocean about a mile wide has opened at the very top of the world, something that has presumably never before been seen by humans. . . . "The last time scientists can be certain the pole was awash in water was more than 50 million years ago." The paper characterized the observation, made by scientists and tourists on a July trip to the Pole aboard a Russian icebreaker, as evidence of global warming's relentless acceleration in the Arctic. Not exactly, the paper admitted a week later. Open water at the North Pole isn't that unusual. And the condition of the Arctic Ocean's ice cap and its relationship to global climate change are more complex than the Times first reported. A later story, published on Aug. 29 in the Times Science section, admitted as much and went into extensive details with satellite photos. The follow-up report prompted ridicule last week from CBS talk show host David Letterman, who mocked the Times for raising the alarm and then saying never mind. The original Times story was based on interviews with internationally respected scientists who saw the open water but who do not study the Arctic Ocean full time. That caveat frustrated some Alaska and Washington researchers, who say the journalist and the scientists, while well-meaning, overreacted. "This is a good case study of how important science is not treated well by the media," Alaska Sea Grant College Program information officer Doug Schneider wrote in an e-mail after the original story appeared on the front page of the Daily News. It also shows "how people with heavyweight science credentials but little actual experience get media coverage and overshadow those who've spent years studying the issue." Not only has open water been observed at or near the North Pole many times, Schneider said, but the prevalence of open leads in the polar ice cap has far more to do with ocean currents and wind patterns than global warming. But people who don't specialize in Arctic oceanography may not realize that. "The average person has never thought about what it's like in the polar regions, so if you go there once or twice, you're going to be surprised by everything you see," University of Washington ice expert Drew Rothrock told Schneider, according to a transcript of a radio show. Still, it's true that the ice cap thinned as much as 40 percent between the 1960s and the 1990s, according to researchers at the University of Alaska Fairbanks and the University of Washington. In addition, average temperatures have risen in the Arctic over the past decades. But local scientists say it's not clear whether these changes are natural cycles or a consequence of global warming. The whole issue began with the Aug. 19 story by noted science journalist John Noble Wilford. His story was based on accounts by several scientists who had just returned from the North Pole. They included oceanographer James McCarthy, director of the Museum of Comparative Zoology at Harvard University and a leader of a United Nation's panel on climate change. McCarthy and other scientists didn't see thick ice on their route north, which surprised them. "We never encountered the ice that one would expect for that area," McCarthy said on a "Talk of the Nation" program broadcast Aug. 25 on National Public Radio. "It was thin; it was intermittent." Among those amazed at the thinness of the ice was the captain of the icebreaker, who was making his 11th visit to the region. When the group found the lead of open water over the Pole, they were stunned. "I don't know if anybody in history ever got to 90 degrees north to be greeted by water," Malcolm McKenna, a paleontologist at New York's American Museum of Natural History, told the Times. McKenna's photograph of the slate-gray lead, rimmed by thin pale ice, graced the cover of the Times. The story went on to link the open water to global warming. But Alaska scientists and others quickly called the interpretations premature, if not wrong. Arctic Ocean ice thickness appears to be governed by a 60- to 70-year cycle that may be triggered by a complex process in the North Atlantic Ocean, according to Igor Polyakov, a physical oceanographer at the International Arctic Research Center in Fairbanks. "If you consider ice thickness, we'd have one period of very thick ice and one period of very thin ice, which are separated by approximately 30 years," Polyakov told Schneider, according to the transcript. "I would be careful with forecasts," he added. "But available data suggests that we are very close to the situation where everything will go to the cold climate regime, with thicker ice, colder air temperature, higher atmospheric pressures in the ocean." So what about the report of open water? That's not so odd either. On any summer day, as much as 15 percent of the Arctic Ocean remains ice-free, according to UAF physical oceanographer Mark Johnson. Johnson told Schneider that the 6-mile-long lead reported by the polar excursion was normal for midsummer. "It's a big ocean up there at the North Pole," Rothrock added. "Sea ice is pretty mobile stuff. It moves around. It cracks. It piles up. It's always on the go." Reporter Doug O'Harra can be reached at do'harra@adn.com ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Antarctic ice sheet is shrinking, scientists say Friday, February 2, 2001 By PAUL RECER THE ASSOCIATED PRESS WASHINGTON -- Scientists have worried for decades that the Antarctic ice sheet was shrinking, threatening a global rise in sea level. Now, satellite studies show that about 7.5 cubic miles of ice have eroded from a key area in just eight years. Melting of that much ice doesn't mean that it is time to get into boats, said one researcher, but the finding may be a "yellow warning flag" that confirms long-term changes are under way in the ice fields covering the South Polar region. The study, which appears today in the journal Science, involved altitude measurements of the West Antarctica Ice Sheet, the smaller of two major ice sheets. It covers 740,000 square miles of the frozen continent. Based on satellite measurements, said Andrew Shepherd, a University College London geologist and first author of the study, it appears that since 1992 the ice sheet has lost ice principally through the speeded-up movement of the Pine Island Glacier, an ice stream that drains about a third of the ice sheet. "The Pine Island Glacier is key," Shepherd said. "It is totally exposed to the sea, and people have identified it as the weak underbelly of the West Antarctica Ice Sheet." Melting of the entire sheet theoretically could cause a global sea level rise of 25 to 45 feet, but Shepherd said that at the present rate of change it would take centuries for the Pine Island Glacier, which is only about 10 percent of the ice sheet, to affect sea level seriously. Jane Ferrigno, a U.S. Geologic Survey geologist and polar ice expert, said a speedup of the Pine Island Glacier, as reported by Shepherd and his co-authors, could foreshadow continuing changes of the West Antarctica Ice Sheet's ice levels. The glacier "is moving faster than we thought," Ferrigno said. "This doesn't mean it could have an effect on coastal areas around the world within the next few decades, but this is a yellow warning flag. This is an area that should be watched carefully." © 2001 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. THE PANAMA CANAL CHANGES WORLD TRAVEL BY BOAT OR SHIP COMPLETE PANAMA CANAL HISTORY An average of 36 to 38 make the trip daily, even though it takes eight to 10 hours to make it through. Ships are raised 85 feet above sea level as they cross the canal, and it takes about 52 million gallons of fresh water to get each ship through its crossing. People man the Panama Canal — some 9,500 work there. The opening of the waterway to world commerce on August 15, 1914, represented the realization of a heroic dream of over 400 years.The 50 miles across the isthmus were among the hardest ever won by human ingenuity. Some interesting facts: A ship traveling from New York to San Francisco can save 7872 miles using the Panama Canal instead of going around South America. In the fiscal year 1994 there where 14,029 transits, which carried 170.8 million long tons of cargo and paid US $ 419.2 million in tolls. The highest Canal toll was US $ 141,344.91 paid by the Crown Princess and the lowest toll ever paid was 36 cents by Richard Halliburton for swimming the Canal in 1928. In 1534, Charles I of Spain ordered the first survey of a proposed canal route through the Isthmus of Panama. More than three centuries passed before the first construction was started. The French labored 20 years, beginning in 1880, but disease and financial problems defeated them. During 1882 the excavation of the Culebra Cut was started, but due to the lack of organization there were no tracks available to remove the spoil that the excavators were producing. After the problems had been overcome, the highest peaks of the cut were attacked. As work proceeded, the worry of landslides and what slope should be adopted to avoid them became a major concern. In 1883 it was realised there was a tidal range of 20 feet at the Pacific, whereas, the Atlantic range was only about 1 foot. It was concluded that this difference in levels would be a danger to navigation. It was proposed that a tidal lock should be constructed at Panama to preserve the level from there to Colon. This plan would save about 10 million cubic metres of excavation. Disease, in the forms of yellow fever and malaria, put much of the work force in the hospitals or six feet underground. The most deadly of the problems on the isthmus had to be overcome - disease. Mortality rates during the French reign - somewhere between ten and twenty thousand were estimated to have died at the canal zone between 1882 and 1888. The rocky ground of the formerly volcanic area proved to be too much for the French steam shovels and dredges, and headway was made only when a plan for dynamiting the rocks underwater and dredging up the pieces was put forth by Philippe Bunau-Varilla (who was later to become one of the most influential individuals in the United States' interest in the canal). Of no help was Lesseps' insistence on a sea-level canal, like he had done at Suez, as opposed to a lock canal, while the latter proved to be cheaper and more feasible even by reports of the time. In 1903, Panama and the United States signed a treaty by which the United States undertook to construct an interoceanic ship canal across the Isthmus of Panama. The following year, the United States purchased from the French Canal Company its rights and properties for $40 million and began construction. The monumental project was completed in ten years at a cost of about $387 million. Since 1903 the United States has invested about $3 billion in the Canal enterprise, approximately two-thirds of which has been recovered. The first American steam shovel started work on the Culebra cut on 11th November 1904. By December 1905 there were 2,600 men at work in the Culebra cut. More than 4,000 wagons were used for the removal of the excavated material. Each wagon was capable of carrying 15 cubic metres of material. These wagons were hauled by 160 locomotives and unloaded by 30 Lidgerwood unloaders. American doctor William Gorgas was called to examine the area. The most troublesome diseases were the mosquito-carried malaria and yellow fever - the same diseases that had kept Napoleon Bonaparte from putting down the uprising in Hati in 1801 - but almost all diseases known to man were endemic. Tuberculosis, cholera, diphtheria, smallpox, bubonic plague - all were cases on file at Panama hospitals in 1904. Gorgas, while not the discoverer of the ability of mosquitos to transmit certain diseases, that credit is reserved to Dr. Ronald Reed, he brought what he had learned at Havanna to Panama. The theory and proven fact was that malaria and yellow fever were transmitted from infected to healthy individual by female mosquitos of the Anapheles and Stegomyia breeds, breeds only common along the equator. Gorgas' goal now was to eliminate the mosquito population from the canal zone. This was not easy as the French had built a veritable mosquito hotel along the canal site - sewage drains and bowls of water used to protect people and objects from the vicious umbrella ants were first-rate mosquito incubators. Gorgas' troops busied themselves with covering all standing or slow-moving bodies of water with a combination oil and insecticide, and isolating infected persons in wire-screen tents. It took the personal recommendation of John Stevens, then head engineer of the canal, to President Roosevelt for Gorgas to get the equipment and medicine he needed to accomplish what he started, but at last the whole of the Canal zone became the pest-free resort area that it remains today, and medical teams and hospitals could pay more attention to other diseases - bubonic plague, tuberculosis - that affected the workers (to a much lesser extent than malaria and yellow fever had). . THE ERIC VON DANIKEN HYPOTHESIS Eric Von Daniken claims to give sufficient proof that life exists on other planets. He explains the evidence left from their visit to earth. For example, in the early 19th century, ancient maps were found showing the Mediterranean and the area around the Dead Sea. After many prominent cartographers reviewed the maps, each individually, confirmed the remarkable fact that all the geographical data was present but not drawn in the right places.So others cartographiers were asked to transfer these ancient maps on a grid and then to a modern globe, only to find that these maps were perfectly accurate (even giving the topography of the interiors and many mountain ranges in the Antarctic that were not even discovered till the 20th century). It was concluded that these maps must have been taken from an aerial view from an extreme height, but how in ancient times? Von Daniken believes the maps can only be a result of alien technology. Another piece of evidence Von Daniken gives to show that extraterrestrials did in fact visit earth, is found in the ancient city of Nazca. There, in a plain of 37 miles long and 1 mile wide are pieces of stone (comparable to rusty iron) lying all over. However, if one takes an aerial view gigantic lines lied out in geometric shapes can be seen. Many of these lines are parallel to each other or intersecting each other, while other lines are connected in a trapezoid shape. Archaeologists classify these lines as Inca roads, but Von Daniken argues that they serve no function for the Inca's simple civilization. He goes on to say that these specific lines have been measured and show to be in exact accordance to astronomical plans. Von Daniken claims these lines served as a landing strip for alien spacecrafts. Von Daniken continues to support his belief of alien visits by discussing cave drawings with forms drawn that resemble today's modern ideal of aliens. Also, examined is the Surmerian's highly developed astronomy, in which he claims that could only be credited to aliens. More evidence is examined in Sacsahuaman in the form of monolithic rocks weighting 100 tons which has been shaped into a design. In Egypt and Iraq, ancient cut crystals lenses have been compared to ones of today. It was found that today's cut crystal lenses must be oxide by an electrochemical process in order to receive the same end product of these discovered in Egypt and Iraq. Von Daniken believes this could only be the work of extraterrestrial life. Probably one of the most interesting evidence Von Daniken gives is that of an ancient electric dry battery, which is based on the galvanic principle. A Pint Size Heroine Sails the World Alone About Ellen MacArthur True Grit of fearless MacArthur There would be nothing remarkable in Derbyshire producing a Hill Walker of the Year or even a Potholer of the Year. But for this landlocked county to produce Yachtsman of the Year, and for that award to go to a 22-year-old, slip of a girl from Whatstandwell, is nothing short of miraculous. Ellen MacArthur will spend 100 days alone at sea in the Vendée Globe yacht race which starts at 13:01 on 5 November, 2000. Kingfisher, the leading European retailer, has enough faith in her to have sponsored her to the tune of £2,000,000 for the design and build of the 60 foot boat that will take her single-handed, non-stop around the world. She does not come from any yachting club, 'Howard's Way' culture and has not risen through the ranks of the sailing elite. As she cheerfully puts it: "I'm not a cool racing person with the right designer gear." For Cowes and Hamble, substitute Flash Dam and Ogston Reservoir. Her great-grandparents came from Skye and were boating people and a great-uncle ran away to sea when young, but any real connection with the sea is tenuous. When Ellen was eight, an aunt took her sailing on the east coast, after which she was hooked. At school, she saved up all her dinner money for three years to buy her first boat, an eight-foot dinghy. She was a "geek", she says candidly, spending all her spare time reading sailing books in the library and soaking up information like a sponge. She was going to be a vet but a bout of glandular fever while she was in the Sixth Form set her back. Instead, she resolved to become a professional sailor. So at 18, she sailed single-handed round Britain and won the Young Sailor of the Year award for being the youngest person to pass the Yachtmaster Offshore Qualification, with the highest possible marks in theory and practical examinations. The nautical establishment looked on benignly at "Little Ellen" from Derbyshire, just 5' 3" tall, and metaphorically patted her on the head. She wrote 2,500 letters to potential sponsors - and received just two replies. They stopped patting her on the head and looked at her in a new light when she undertook the Mini-Transat solo race from Brest in France to Martinique in the French Caribbean in 1997. With little money, no major sponsorship and not even a return ticket, she took the ferry to France, bought Le Poisson, a 21ft yacht, and refitted it on site. She learned French in order to deal with French shipwrights and camped next to Le Poisson while she worked on the mast and hull. Then she sailed 2,700 miles across the Atlantic; a race which she completed in 33 days. This achievement brought her first major sponsorship from Kingfisher, who believe in backing young people with an ambition to succeed. In a new boat, the 50 ft Kingfisher, she undertook the Route du Rhum transatlantic race in November of last year, winning her class and finishing fifth overall in the monohulls. She is a heroine in France, where she has been named 'La Jeune Espoire de la Voile' (Sailing's Young Hope). More people flock down to the quayside to see her off on a race than fill Wembley Stadium for a Cup Final. They shout her favourite phrase, "Ellen, à donf" which means "Full on! Go for it". Sailing in France is what the marine industry hopes will arrive in Britain, where water sports appeal to a wider audience, especially young people. Thousands follow Ellen's race progress on the Internet. Messages and digital pictures from a boat in the middle of the Atlantic can be instantly relayed around the world from the on-board computer and updated every hour. Satellite phones mean contact on shore for weather routing and emergencies. Ellen's uncle, Dr Glyn MacArthur, a GP in Crich, was woken during one night to hear Ellen's voice asking his advice on a head injury she'd sustained during a severe gale on the Route du Rhum. Exhausting racing conditions mean sleeping in ten-minute snatches, a survival suit that doesn't come off for a week at a time and hands and wrists covered in salt sores and cuts. Dehydrated food comes in packets: if they get wet, the labels peel off and she doesn't know if she'll be eating curry or pudding until she opens one. Sails, weighing twice as much as she does, may need changing a dozen times a day. There are moments of pure elation - sunrises and seascapes that take the breath away. But there are nightmare times when lone sailors must become engineers. She describes a night and day that ran together, when 15 litres of fluid (resembling cooking oil) burst from the rams controlling the keel, the big steel fin that goes down through the boat. In heavy seas, slipping and sliding round the deck and with the keel unstabilised, she had to drip feed oil back in to the reservoir through a tiny funnel. Before she'd fixed the keel, a piece on one of the sails ripped, which meant taking down the sail and sewing for five hours through the night. Water came through the hatch and was swilling round the boat. And then later, when she'd dried all the compartments, a mighty bang threw the boat on to its side and all the electricity that powered the satcom communication system went off. What keeps her going is sheer determination not to be beaten: "When it's a race, you just can't stop. Five times a day, you get the position of all the other boats in the race and work out whether you've gained or lost time," she says. "It would be easy to say, 'chill out', when you're tired but you never have to lose the goal of the finish line. That's what you set out to do and that's what you stick to." She's spurred on too by the messages she receives on her email. "We're proud of you. We're guilty that we haven't put half the effort into our lives that you put into everything you do," one said. Her response is: "When you're out there in the freezing cold and you're being tossed around and you don't seem to be achieving what you want to achieve, a message like that comes through and just takes you away from it. How could you possibly give up?" Kingfisher's 115,000 staff world wide will be following her progress in the Vendée Globe as if she were one of the family. There isn't an ounce of vanity in her and she's a tireless ambassador for the sport. "Anyone could do it", she says, and means it. "You only need a few hundred pounds and you've got to start somewhere." Getting this far has pushed her harder than she'd ever have imagined but she insists: "If there's one thing I've learned in this past year, it's that deep down in your heart, if you have a dream, then you can and must make it happen." She's based now at Yarmouth in the Isle of Wight, where she and fellow yachtsman Mark Turner run their own company, Offshore Challenges. Trips home are infrequent but she'll grab any opportunity of a visit, letting herself and her dog, Mac, into the caravan in her parents' garden. Ken and Avril MacArthur know she's home when they see the laptop computer and the mobile phone. We're due to take pictures and I ask on the telephone, "How do I get to your Gran's house?" There's a pause while she thinks. And then: "I'll put my Mum on!" says the girl from Derbyshire who will navigate herself around the world. Courtesy of Derbyshire Life Magazine (Pat Ashworth) For more information about Ellen, visit www.ellenmacarthur.com. Friday February 9, 2001 Frenchman Nears Solo Yacht Race Win PARIS (AP) - With the finish a day away, Michel Desjoyeaux of France was in position Friday to win the Vendee Globe solo round-the-world yacht race. Britain's Ellen MacArthur, at 24 the youngest skipper in the race, was in second place, organizers said. Desjoyeaux looked as if he would be the first to reach the finish line at the French port of Les Sables d'Olonne on Saturday. Of the 24 skippers who left Les Sables d'Olonne three months ago, 16 are still in the race that takes the 50- to 60-foot boats across three oceans. After sailing nearly 24,000 miles nonstop, Desjoyeaux was almost 500 miles from Les Sables d'Olonne, from where the race started Nov. 9. MacArthur trailed by nearly 800 miles. ``I think Michel won this race pretty early on,'' Dominique Wavre, who is in fifth place, was quoted as saying on Vendee Globe's Web site Friday. ``He's had all the right cards to win this race over and above his talent.'' Last week, MacArthur briefly seized the lead, capping an extraordinary three weeks in which she wiped out Desjoyeaux's 750-mile advantage as the pair raced up the Atlantic. But MacArthur slipped back into second place after only a day in front. She also had a serious setback when her yacht hit an object and was damaged, although she has since repaired the boat. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sunday January 21, 2001 Briton Gaining in Round-The-World Sea Race LONDON (Reuters) - Britain's Ellen MacArthur has slashed the lead of Frenchman Michel Desjoyeaux in the Vendee Globe non-stop, singlehanded round-the-world race, officials said on Sunday. A week ago when MacArthur, the youngest competitor in the race at 23, rounded Cape Horn, she was some 623 nautical miles behind leader Desjoyeaux. By Sunday, she had cut that lead to just 225 miles and was still gaining on the Frenchman, who had fallen victim to light winds. The leading boats in the race were on the home stretch, sailing up the Atlantic Ocean toward the finish in Les Sable d'Olonne, France, where 24 boats started the race on November 9. Desjoyeaux, who is trapped in what is known as the St. Helena high pressure system, said: ``There is nothing I can do. Saint Helena is annoying me. ``I am waiting for the system to change but when I look at my weather files it doesn't get better for me. I am preparing to see the others in a few days.'' In the past 24 hours MacArthur has averaged more than 14 knots, while Desjoyeaux has made a comparatively slow nine knots.

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What do you usually find in a golf courses' bunker?

Bunkers | PGA.com Bunkers How to hit a flop shot out of a bunker You're in a greenside bunker with not much room to work with. You need to hit a flop shot from the sand, one of the hardest shots in golf. PGA Professional Mitch Lowe shows how to master this high-flying, soft-landing shot. 0 Comments

Sand

What can be a young mammal, a human muscle, and a chunk of sea ice?

Dave's Top Ten Golf Tips GOLF TIP # 10 Play it the Way You Feel When golf first began the golf courses were not in very good condition. The greens were slow and bumpy, the sand traps were not raked, the fairways were rolling and bumpy and the grass was long and not watered. Compared to then, the golf courses today are immaculate. The greens are fast and smooth, the sand traps have regular maintenance, the fairways are even better. Its obvious the technology was different; wooden shafts, feather golf balls. Now it's graphite shafts, surlyn golf balls and titanium, titanium and titanium. And, how about the education? Exercise and diet? And the list goes on. We will have a tendency to say to ourselves that "all of this is relative to the times" and for the most part it is. But there are a couple of things that still remains. One of them is that we still want to play the game of golf by feel. Golf instruction has definitely become a little too detailed. Just get up and hit the ball! Do you think of every little move that your body makes when you make a right-hand turn with the car?......foot on the brake, foot on the gas peddle, hand over hand as you turn the steering wheel? You do it by feel. You react to the road. They say that history will sometimes repeat itself. I wonder, will golf instruction lean more towards feel rather than analytical golf swing mechanics? And will the golfers themselves swing the way they feel rather than trying to achieve the perfect computer golf swing? Just ask Jim Furyk or Billy Casper ! GOLF TIP # 9 Practice I have had beginner students take a golf lesson from me and come back a week later and have the expectations of being ready to play the golf course. (And in some cases they are ready to play the golf course!) I have had regular students come back a week later for another golf lesson and cannot understand why they are not hitting the ball better. In both cases, neither of the students practiced between lessons. And that is okay. I know it is hard to find the time when we all have other obligations. However, the fact still remains that if we want to learn the game or improve, we have to want to practice. There is no other way around it! As a beginner you will have to spend time on the practice range to get started. As a non-beginner you could just go to the range and iron out the one shot that you had trouble with on that day. And if you really want to be a good golfer than you should try and spend quality time on the range and play a lot of rounds of golf. GOLF TIP # 8 Play The Golf Course More Than You Practice On The Driving Range Practice makes perfect? Or does perfect practice make perfect! If you do not like going to the driving range then, play more golf. You can and will have so much more opportunity to improve your game and learn so much more on the golf course. On the practice range you rarely get a sidehill lie or a downhill lie or an uphill lie or a ball buried in the rough or have to hit a low shot under the trees. Plus the practice range is so wide open, there is nothing there to guide you. On the golf course there are fairways that are lined with trees to guide you and most fairways offer a variety of lies to challenge you. Because you're actually playing the golf course, it is much easier to apply all of the necessary skills. You have the opportunity to sharpen your visualization skills. You can and will manage your game better. And let us not forget the incredible opportunity we have to let our competitive nature get a taste of the action!! GOLF TIP # 7 Competition It is in our nature to be competitive, we cannot deny that fact. So, let us go with the flow. Play in golf tournaments. It will make you and I a better golfer! You can and will experience in competition the things you will never experience practicing on the driving range or playing on the golf course. Competition gives you the chance to test yourself. It gives you the opportunity to become disciplined. With regard to skills, competition will absolutely assist you in your achievement to adopt the necessary golf course management skills. Not to mention the fact that you will improve your overall golf game. Your short game will reach a new level, your handicap will get better, and you will be able to be more consistent with your drives. Yes, competition will help an individual master the right techniques that improve the individuals' scores which lowers the individuals handicaps! GOLF TIP # 6 Golf Course Management Keep The Golf Ball In Play! Keeping your golf ball in play will increase the amount of opportunities that you will have to shoot better scores. The whole objective of playing golf is to shoot a good golf score!!! Good golf course management says that when you are in the sandtrap, the number one priority is to get the golf ball out of the sandtrap. A lot of times when we are in the sandtrap we think of getting the golf ball close to the hole and end up still in the sandtrap. By using good golf course management in getting the golf ball out of the sandtrap we create an opportunity to make the putt no matter where it is on the green. If you clear the creek that runs across the fairway, with your driver off the tee, you will have a wedge into the green on your second shot. But, good golf course management says that by hitting a 3-iron or a 5-wood off the tee you will be hitting an 8-iron and maybe even a 7-iron on your second shot. And that is not so bad to have an 8-iron rather then a wedge on your second shot! Why is that not so bad? Because you have kept the ball in play, you have taken the creek in the fairway out of play, you have kept up a good rhythm because you are not mad at yourself for hitting the golf ball in the creek. Good rhythm helps reduce tension and you have more energy to visualize yourself making a good score on the hole, which is the objective of the game! GOLF TIP # 5 Visualization Visualize......The key to golf!!! After you have developed a repeatable swing and are able to play on the golf course with some confidence, the next step and probably the most important is the development of your visualization skills. Even if you are not real confident in your golf game it is still good to work on developing your visualization skills. When golf first began the golfers had to rely a lot on feel and feel is directly related to what you visualize. Feelings are the results of your thoughts. What you think is what you feel. We all have the ability to visualize. It is just a matter of wanting to develop that skill to the fullest potential!!! We all have other obligations to take care of and we do not always have the time to practice our golf game. That is the great thing about visualizing. It has been proven that you do not always have to physically do some things to develop them. Just by sitting at home in your favorite recliner, for five minutes a day, you can think about those putts that you made in your last round of golf or you can think about those awesome long and straight drives you had off the tee. Believe it or not, you are practicing in the comfort of your own home. By thinking of those great moments you are reminding yourself of the fact that you can do it! Thinking of positive thoughts makes you feel good and when you feel good your brain and your body will store that information more often and sooner rather later it will become a habit!! Disciplining yourself to do a little every day is the trick!! Frequency is the key to practicing. The beauty of visualization is that it is simple, and it works! GOLF TIP # 4 Make Putts HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUILD CONFIDENCE, SAVE TIME, REDUCE TENSION AND MAKE MONEY!?! Going to the practice putting green and doing the right thing (Making putts) will help you build confidence, save time, reduce tension and make money. It does not take a lot of time to practice making putts. 15 minutes a day! That is all. Just go to the practice putting green and start off with two-foot putts, three-foot putts and build your confidence. The 15 minutes that you spent making putts will do more for you than spending three hours of missing putts. Spend five minutes making putts and then you are done! Not only have you saved time but you will take those good thoughts with you for the rest of the day! Doesn't it make sense to exit the driving range with good thoughts that are relaxing rather than frustrated feelings of not being able to hit the driver 500 yards!! The swing you make with your driver requires more effort. Compared to the stroke you make with your putter. After you practiced your driver (or any other club) before you leave the driving range, relax with a few short putts!! Making putts, building confidence, saving time, reducing tension will all add up to you shooting better scores. Chances are that the next skins game you are in against your friends, you definitely have an excellent opportunity to make money! No matter how much you read on how to hit the golf ball further or what golf club will lower your handicap, one thing remains........... we still have to MAKE PUTTS! GOLF TIP # 3 Tension IF we all knew how to rid ourselves of tension then we could patent the idea and make millions. Tension is the root of all evil in the golf swing! Instead of trying to find the perfect golf swing that everybody says will cure all of your tension problems, learn how to deal with tension itself. Find out what it is that causes the tension. I know that when I drink too much coffee in the morning before a round of golf I definitely get the jitters and it usually doesn't wear off until seven or eight holes later. Whatever is bothering you, just go over to the driving range and just take the driver out and just start ripping it!! That ought to release some tension. Or use visualization techniques to release the tension. Imagine that you are in the Bahamas and all of your cares are washing away in the sea. Add positive affirmations and your're back in the zone. What about when you force a certain shot on the golf course? For example, when you are in the greenside bunker and the pin is right up against the bunker and knowing that it is impossible to get the golf ball close to the hole you go ahead anyway and force the shot out of the bunker. If you try to get the ball close to the hole, instead of just trying to get the ball on the green. You usually end up back in the bunker and having to hit again. Because you have to hit again, you get a little up tight about the fact that your playing partners are witnessing your terrible performance out of the greenside bunker plus, your even more disgusted with yourself because you know that you are a pretty good bunker player. Just getting the ball out of the bunker can save you from self-destruction. The worst that could happen is you would two-putt with a calm attitude. After long and countless hours of 110% of pure effort towards achieving a perfect computer-model golf swing, I have desired to learn that an 80% effortless swing will more than fullfill and produce the goal of getting the golf ball in the cup. Which is the objective of the game. Tempo reduces tension. To focus on only trying to hit the golf ball 80% of my effort enables me to reduce any tension in my golf swing. As the 80% effortless golf swing calmly forces me to free up my muscles I then begin to swing more according to my own mental and physical capabilities. Different people have different tempos. Some are fast and some are slow . Use whichever one works for you! GOLF TIP # 2 Tap In To Your Own World (The Zone) Concentration...Focus...In the Zone...What do they all have in common? Before I tell you let me ask you a question. What was it that made us motivated as a child? To play golf we have to deal with a lot of outside circumstances that can side track us from what it is we need to do. (Which is to get the golf ball in the hole!) There is no doubt that it is harder to focus when we are not having fun. So how do we tap into our own world? How do we get into the zone? First of all, imagine what it would be like if you where playing eighteen holes of golf and during the whole round no one could penetrate your space, no matter what anyone said to you. Nothing mattered because you where so focused on getting the golf ball in the cup; you were soo relaxed...no bills to pay...no kids to worry about...no business deadlines to meet...no worries about where the next paycheck was coming from...no taxes to pay...no responsibilities at all. WAIT!! Did I say no responsibilities at all? Can I go back to the question that I asked you before about what it was that made us all highly motivated as a child? No responsibilities. Would you agree that it is a lot easier to have fun when you have nothing to worry about or nothing to lose? Or should I say that having fun keeps us from worrying. If a young child is having fun, that child does not have the time to worry because they are always in the present! They are totally focused in the moment. Tapping into your own world and being totally focused on one thing at a time, however long that may be, is tapping into the zone. Time is suspended and it is easy to have fun. Because we are having fun, we become soo focused or zoned in on what we are doing, that it really takes no effort at all! I know from experience that when I start making a couple of bogeys I begin to look for an escape goat or an easy way out. So the easiest thing to put the blame on is the golf swing. Or I will try to put the blame on the other players in the group or those kids yelling and screaming and having fun in the playground across the street from the golf course. I begin to lose my focus or my concentration because making bogeys is no fun. There are two ways that I have learned to face my fear of losing focus or stepping out of my world. The first is to practice over and over the thoughts that I want to think about on a daily basis or to practice over and over the kind of golf game that I want to shoot. I want to predict my circumstances before they predict me. By thinking about the great drives that I have hit in tournament golf on a daily basis, for about one month, I will have prepared myself to go out on a golf course and perform as I have predicted (or as I have thought about). No matter how much you practice there might be those days when things just do not come together. What do you do then? The answer is in GOLF TIP # 1. GOLF TIP # 1 Attitude No matter how much you practice the right thing, nothing is guaranteed. And no matter how perfect the conditions are, the balanced golf ball, the perfect putting stroke, perfect weather and the perfect putter. No matter how perfect everything is, one day that golf ball will drop in the hole and the next day, under the same conditions and circumstances, the ball may not drop in the hole. The best way to combat those days are to laugh, laugh, have a great ATTITUDE and laugh again. Golf....like life, is not a game of perfect! Attitude....the only thing that can never be defeated! Home

i don't know

Name the 1995 movie from the plot summary: "Two detectives, a rookie and a veteran, hunt a serial killer who uses the seven deadly sins as his modus operandi."

Se7en (1995) - Plot Summary - IMDb Se7en (1995) Plot Summary Showing all 4 plot summaries A film about two homicide detectives' ( Morgan Freeman and ( Brad Pitt desperate hunt for a serial killer who justifies his crimes as absolution for the world's ignorance of the Seven Deadly Sins. The movie takes us from the tortured remains of one victim to the next as the sociopathic "John Doe" ( Kevin Spacey ) sermonizes to Detectives Somerset and Mills -- one sin at a time. The sin of Gluttony comes first and the murderer's terrible capacity is graphically demonstrated in the dark and subdued tones characteristic of film noir. The seasoned and cultured but jaded Somerset researches the Seven Deadly Sins in an effort to understand the killer's modus operandi while the bright but green and impulsive Detective Mills (Pitt) scoffs at his efforts to get inside the mind of a killer... - Written by Mark Fleetwood <mfleetwo@mail.coin.missouri.edu> Taking place in a nameless city, Se7en follows the story of two homicide detectives tracking down a sadistic serial killer ( Kevin Spacey ) who chooses his victims according to the seven deadly sins. Brad Pitt stars as Detective David Mills, a hopeful but naive rookie who finds himself partnered with veteran Detective William Somerset ( Morgan Freeman ). Together they trace the killer's every step, witnessing the aftermath of his horrific crimes one by one as the victims pile up in rapid succession, all the while moving closer to a gruesome fate neither of them could have predicted. - Written by David Foyer This thriller portrays the exploits of a deranged serial killer. His twisted agenda involves choosing seven victims who represent egregious examples of transgressions of each of the Seven Deadly Sins. He then views himself as akin to the Sword of God, handing out horrific punishment to these sinners. Two cops, an experienced veteran of the streets ( Morgan Freeman ) who is about to retire and the ambitious young homicide detective ( Brad Pitt ) hired to replace him, team up to capture the perpetrator of these gruesome killings. Unfortunately, they too become ensnared in his diabolical plan....

seven

What type of animal is a skink?

Se7en | NontonGO.com Se7en Genre: Crime , Mystery , Drama Plot Two detectives, a rookie and a veteran, hunt a serial killer who uses the seven deadly sins as his modus operandi. Se7en Rating: 0 out of 10 (0 votes) List Episode

i don't know

Love him or not, Paul Ryan has been officially nominated as the Republican Vice Presidential candidate. What state is he a Representative for?

Paul Ryan selected by Republicans for speaker - CNNPolitics.com 1 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan announced Monday, January 12, that he would not run for president in 2016, preferring instead to focus on policy work as chairman of the House Ways and Means Committee. Ryan, the GOP's 2012 vice presidential nominee, has long been seen as a top contender for the presidency. Hide Caption 2 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan, center, speaks with Rep. Devin Nunes, R-California, before a House Ways and Means Committee meeting on March 12, 2014. Hide Caption 3 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan and his wife, Janna, arrive at a state dinner at the White House in honor of French President Francois Hollande on February 11, 2014 . Hide Caption 4 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Willie Robertson of the reality TV series "Duck Dynasty" poses for a picture with Ryan and his wife, Janna, before President Obama delivers his State of the Union address on January 28, 2014. Hide Caption 5 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks at the Conservative Political Action Conference in National Harbor, Maryland, on March 15, 2013. Hide Caption 6 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan greets supporters during a presidential campaign rally with Mitt Romney at The Square at Union Centre in West Chester, Ohio, on November 2, 2012. Hide Caption 7 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Rep. Paul Ryan of Wisconsin speaks during a campagin stop at the Iowa State Fair in Des Moines on August 13, 2012. It was the newly minted GOP vice presidential candidate's first solo stop since becoming Romney's running mate. Hide Caption 8 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks after Romney announced him as his running mate in Norfolk, Virginia, on August 11, 2012. Hide Caption 9 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Romney introduced Ryan as his running mate in front of the USS Wisconsin. The seven-term congressman provides a strong contrast to the Obama administration on fiscal policy. Hide Caption 10 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Romney jokes with Ryan in April 2012 during a pancake brunch at Bluemound Gardens in Milwaukee. Hide Caption 11 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan looks on as Romney greets people June 18, 2012, during a campaign event in Janesville, Wisconsin. Hide Caption 12 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks while campaigning for Romney at a textile factory in Janesville, Wisconsin, on June 18, 2012. Hide Caption 13 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan, left, and Romney greet each other on stage April 3, 2012, during the primary night gathering at The Grain Exchange in Milwaukee. Hide Caption Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan introduces Romney at a town hall meeting in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, on April 2, 2012. Hide Caption 15 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan is introduced before speaking about the federal budget at Georgetown University on April 26, 2012. Hide Caption 16 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan holds a news conference in December 2011 in Washington to introduce a package of 10 legislative reforms designed to revamp the budget process. Hide Caption 17 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan listens as Ben Bernanke, chairman of the U.S. Federal Reserve, speaks at the Committee for a Responsible Federal Budget annual conference in Washington on June 14, 2011. Hide Caption 18 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan looks over papers as he waits for other House Republicans to arrive for a news conference in the Capitol Visitors Center in 2010. Hide Caption Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks to the media in 2009 about President Barack Obama's 2010 budget proposal. Hide Caption 20 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan, left, and Sen. Judd Gregg of New Hampshire speak to reporters about the 2010 federal budget. Hide Caption 21 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Then-Budget Committee Chairman John M. Spratt Jr., left, and ranking member Ryan listen to Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke testify during the House Budget hearing on the economy on January 17, 2008. Hide Caption 22 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan follows President George W. Bush off of Air Force One at General Mitchell International Airport - Air Reserve Station in Milwaukee on July 11, 2006. Hide Caption 23 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks at a Cato Institute briefing on Medicare reform in the Rayburn House Office Building in Washington on July 22, 2003. Hide Caption

Wisconsin

What “magician”, born Christopher Nicholas Sarantakos, is the “genius” behind the Mindfreak tv show and the Believe Las Vegas show?

Paul Ryan elected House speaker - CNNPolitics.com Paul Ryan elected House speaker By Deirdre Walsh , CNN Senior Congressional Producer Updated 5:17 PM ET, Thu October 29, 2015 Chat with us in Facebook Messenger. Find out what's happening in the world as it unfolds. JUST WATCHED Nancy Pelosi passes gavel to House Speaker Paul Ryan 01:56 Story highlights Paul Ryan was elected the 54th House speaker on Thursday John Boehner is retiring from Congress after serving as speaker since 2011 Washington (CNN) Rep. Paul Ryan was officially elected as the 54th speaker of the House after he got the votes of 236 members by the full House of Representatives. The vote was largely a formality after House Republicans nominated him for the position on Wednesday. But even some conservatives who did not support Ryan said that after weeks of infighting, they were eager to move on and give Ryan the space to unite the party's various factions and craft a legislative agenda. After losing 43 votes in the House GOP internal election a day earlier, only nine House Republicans voted against Ryan on the House floor. Boehner gave a farewell address before the vote on Thursday, a day after the House approved a significant budget deal he negotiated with President Barack Obama and congressional Democrats. The legislation, which eliminates the possibility of a default and decreases the chance of a government shutdown, effectively gives Ryan a fresh start. Read More Will Ryan offer Obama a fresh start with House GOP? After he was sworn in as Speaker, Ryan praised Boehner, calling him "a true class act" and urged members from both sides to come together. Ryan attempted to get members to turn the page saying "a lot is on our shoulders. So if you ever pray, pray for each other -- Republicans for Democrats, Democrats for Republicans." After a standing ovation Ryan joked, "And I don't mean pray for a conversion." He becomes the third Catholic in a row in the position, after Boehner and Nancy Pelosi, now the Minority Leader. He took the oath on his own copy of the New American bible and kept the gavel he wielded as Chairman of the powerful tax writing committee. Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Rep. Paul Ryan, R.-Wisconsin, was elected the 54th speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives on Thursday, October 29, after receiving the votes of 236 members. The vote was largely a formality after House Republicans nominated him for the position on Wednesday, October 28. Hide Caption 1 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan announced Monday, January 12, that he would not run for president in 2016, preferring instead to focus on policy work as chairman of the House Ways and Means Committee. Ryan, the GOP's 2012 vice presidential nominee, has long been seen as a top contender for the presidency. Hide Caption 2 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan, center, speaks with Rep. Devin Nunes, R-California, before a House Ways and Means Committee meeting on March 12, 2014. Hide Caption 3 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan and his wife, Janna, arrive at a state dinner at the White House in honor of French President Francois Hollande on February 11, 2014 . Hide Caption 4 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Willie Robertson of the reality TV series "Duck Dynasty" poses for a picture with Ryan and his wife, Janna, before President Obama delivers his State of the Union address on January 28, 2014. Hide Caption 5 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks at the Conservative Political Action Conference in National Harbor, Maryland, on March 15, 2013. Hide Caption 6 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan greets supporters during a presidential campaign rally with Mitt Romney at The Square at Union Centre in West Chester, Ohio, on November 2, 2012. Hide Caption 7 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Rep. Paul Ryan of Wisconsin speaks during a campagin stop at the Iowa State Fair in Des Moines on August 13, 2012. It was the newly minted GOP vice presidential candidate's first solo stop since becoming Romney's running mate. Hide Caption 8 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks after Romney announced him as his running mate in Norfolk, Virginia, on August 11, 2012. Hide Caption 9 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Romney introduced Ryan as his running mate in front of the USS Wisconsin. The seven-term congressman provides a strong contrast to the Obama administration on fiscal policy. Hide Caption 10 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Romney jokes with Ryan in April 2012 during a pancake brunch at Bluemound Gardens in Milwaukee. Hide Caption 11 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan looks on as Romney greets people June 18, 2012, during a campaign event in Janesville, Wisconsin. Hide Caption 12 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks while campaigning for Romney at a textile factory in Janesville, Wisconsin, on June 18, 2012. Hide Caption 13 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan, left, and Romney greet each other on stage April 3, 2012, during the primary night gathering at The Grain Exchange in Milwaukee. Hide Caption Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan introduces Romney at a town hall meeting in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, on April 2, 2012. Hide Caption 15 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan is introduced before speaking about the federal budget at Georgetown University on April 26, 2012. Hide Caption 16 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan holds a news conference in December 2011 in Washington to introduce a package of 10 legislative reforms designed to revamp the budget process. Hide Caption 17 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan listens as Ben Bernanke, chairman of the U.S. Federal Reserve, speaks at the Committee for a Responsible Federal Budget annual conference in Washington on June 14, 2011. Hide Caption 18 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan looks over papers as he waits for other House Republicans to arrive for a news conference in the Capitol Visitors Center in 2010. Hide Caption Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks to the media in 2009 about President Barack Obama's 2010 budget proposal. Hide Caption 20 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan, left, and Sen. Judd Gregg of New Hampshire speak to reporters about the 2010 federal budget. Hide Caption 21 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Then-Budget Committee Chairman John M. Spratt Jr., left, and ranking member Ryan listen to Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke testify during the House Budget hearing on the economy on January 17, 2008. Hide Caption 22 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan follows President George W. Bush off of Air Force One at General Mitchell International Airport - Air Reserve Station in Milwaukee on July 11, 2006. Hide Caption 23 of 25 Photos: Paul Ryan, rising GOP star Ryan speaks at a Cato Institute briefing on Medicare reform in the Rayburn House Office Building in Washington on July 22, 2003. Hide Caption

i don't know

What are the two signs of the Zodiac that cover the month of September?

Virgo - Zodiac Signs | Astrology.com.au Virgo Welcome to Astrology.com.au Astrology.com.au is all about Astrology, Horoscopes, Love, Romance, Compatibility and Live Psychics As one of the world's premiere astrology sites, astrology.com.au provides a variety of astrological, psychic, spiritual and new-age information to an ever-growing global audience. Astrology.com.au specialises in relationships, love, horoscopes, zodiac and astrology compatibility and features a variety of complimentary reports, readings and daily horoscopes for your enjoyment and wisdom. Chinese astrology and zodiac compatibility are also included in our range of offerings. Some of our specialties include a large number of free horoscopes and psychic readings. Our website is deeply committed to the highest quality service we can afford our visitors. We are in fact so committed that if you are not at all satisfied with any of our products or services we are happy to offer a full refund. Our reporting and personal consulting services are also based upon empowering our visitors and helping them understand themselves as well as their relationships. Although we pride ourselves on our astrological expertise and intuitive insights, these things are of no use unless we can help you translate those findings, readings, and intuitions into some form of practical self-empowerment. Our website is dedicated to this single goal. Our daily, monthly and yearly readings are of course general in nature but as a means of introducing our audience to astrology, we believe this initial teaser will stimulate a greater interest to find out more and in-depth information based upon accurately prepared horoscopes which rely on one's time, place and date of birth. If you have any questions at all please feel free to contact us at dadhichi@astrology.com.au We hope you enjoy your stay here. May the Stars shine down their blessings, good fortune and happiness on you! Regards, The Zodiac Sign Virgo The Astrology of Personality Virgo, yours is the star sign of true perfectionism, diligence and first-class service. You are extremely conscious of how well everything should be done. But you’re also critical about most things, especially your own character and this is what people sometimes misunderstand about you and think that you’re impossible to please. This is just the way you are wired and your attention to detail and aspiration to excellence carries over into every aspect of your life, including the way you see yourself. Everything has to be just right with you, Virgo, so you do have this unusual tendency to be particularly fastidious about your environment and the way you look. You have very high standards and, unless others are able to meet these acquirements of yours, they may find it extremely hard getting into your good books. Cleanliness and hygiene is also one of your bugbears. There’s nothing wrong with keeping clean and making sure your health is up to scratch, but for some Virgos, this can become an obsessive pastime and does seem rather odd to those who aren’t quite as meticulous as you are. You’re an excellent critic and observer of human nature and the world around you. Your analysis of life and what goes on in it is usually quite correct, but try to curb your habit of finding fault with every little thing. This will be very annoying to your loved ones, who will find it hard meeting your expectations. Again, this tendency will be turned on yourself with the result that you may never be quite satisfied with your own work or who you are as a person. There’s nothing wrong with you Virgo; you’re one of the good guys, remember that. You have a wonderful broad base of knowledge, which means your generally quite interesting to be with and you converse with anyone you happen to meet. You’re always able to come up with impromptu solutions to the problem of others and this is another rather fascinating aspect of your personality. Because you admire good service, you will also endeavour your best to provide first-class assistance to others. This is your primary motivation in life, which is why I say your keywords are ‘I serve’. If someone asks you to do something you like to do it properly without cutting corners and rushing the job. Making sure that every detail is attended to, you’re impressive even in the most mundane tasks. Disorganisation is abhorrent to you, which is why you are neat and tidy and will always have a diary with you. Are you one of those Virgos who is always making lists to make sure that you don’t leave something out? I hope you’re not a person who has a briefcase or handbag full of lists and never quite finishes what’s on that list! Organise your time a little better so that you don’t run yourself ragged. Virgos are cautious characters and don’t like to rush things. You are also shy and unassuming but this is only because you like to analyse something or someone before committing yourself to an opinion. Virgos aren’t the sort of people who jump to conclusions, so your judgements are usually correct and the outcome satisfactory. You may table take longer than most to achieve your goals, but you prefer to finish the race a little more slowly than to make an error. Loyalty and honour are particularly important to you in any type of relationship and others will soon realise this as they get to know you. You give of yourself 100 per cent and expect the same level of integrity from those around you. This could also become something that dominates your relationships and you must be careful not to become habituated to testing your friends to see whether they are genuine. This will make them feel as if they’re under the magnifying glass for every little thing and will alienate them. Try to trust people more, which will help you unwind and enjoy life. 6th sign of the zodiac, common, barren, feminine, dry Zodiac element Loving, susceptible, sympathetic, sensual, faithful, instinctive, charitable, over-reactive and moody Compatible star signs Taurus, Cancer, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces Mismatched signs Aries, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius, Libra Ruling planet Saturn Lucky numbers and significant years 5, 6, 8, 14, 15, 17, 23, 24, 26, 32, 33, 35, 41, 42, 44, 50, 51, 53, 62, 71, 77 and 80 Lucky gems Green jade, emerald, green quartz, diamond, white coral Lucky fragrances Lavender, chamomile, verbena, patchouli,peppermint, rosemary, basil, black pepper and lemon Affirmation-mantra I am relaxed and deserve to be served as well as serve Lucky days Virgo Profile Being born under the sign of Virgo, the sixth sign of the zodiac, endows you with a highly developed sense of perfection and coupled with an analytical mind can drive others in your orb absolutely crazy. You of course don't see what's wrong with wanting everything perfect, tidy, clean and thoroughly organised as it is your nature. You can also be totally preoccupied with cleanliness, hygiene and be extremely fastidious. However you are far more critical of yourself than anyone else and your standards are way above that which most people would aspire to, but that doesn't make them right and you wrong, does it Virgo? It is simply a difference of opinion and what is deemed acceptable or unacceptable. People closely associated with you can learn valuable lessons about time management and pride in any work they do. Your expertise is highly valued and it is probable that you will find some people seeking you out to be on their team. These people will recognize your natural talents and be prepared to not take your criticism too personally. When you are critical it is more than likely because you've analysed and summed up a situation correctly before acting out your thoughts. Others may find this annoying but, given enough time and exposure to you, they will recognize that your analytical skills are second to none. You are a most interesting person to be with because of your skilful insights and broad-based knowledge. Associates and family will be fascinated by your seemingly never-ending source of titbits and information. googletag.cmd.push(function() {googletag.display('div-gpt-ad-1427450087413-1');}); Any job or project that you are asked to perform will be done to the highest standard, meticulous attention to detail from the commencement until the end. You take pride in doing a job well done and once you have all the information required you complete your task to the best of your ability. You work through the details in an analytical way, organise your work schedule and it doesn't matter to you if it is a job you have done a hundred times before or the first time you have attempted it - the degree of excellence doesn't vary. Your attitude is "if a job's worth doing it's worth doing well" and there is no deviation from this maxim. You are very clear on this and nothing less will do. Others may think it is a waste of time to dot the I's and cross the t's but not you. Oh no, perfection is where you start and perfection is where you end. Time is also important to you and a diary is a tool well used. Lists, lists and more lists may be your style but at the end of the day you will know exactly what you have done and how much more you need to do. Not only that but you will have a fairly good idea of how long it is going to take you to finish the task and what materials will be needed along the way. This is where your time management and analytical skills really come to the fore. It is very likely that your diary will be written in the same colour pen from start to finish and that no untidy crossing out will be seen on any page. It will be a picture of neatness. You have a hawk eye and can spot an error a mile away, whether it is a mistake on a food bill or a spelling error on a sign. You are also cautious about what type of person is just right for you in your social or romantic life and slovenly people need not apply. You are very well read and consider yourself an eternal student of sorts. You'll pay special attention to the fine detail of any subject matter and this is how you amass your considerable knowledge of many things. You have a keen intelligence and a capacity for learning and prefer to make your judgements on sound knowledge that is tried and true, rather than airy fairy stories and beliefs. You can appear to be shy and unassuming when people first meet you but that is only because you like to observe and analyse people and situations before jumping to a conclusion. You are cautious with new acquaintances and don't give too much away before they have passed your stringent behaviour code. googletag.cmd.push(function() {googletag.display('div-gpt-ad-1427450087413-1');}); Virgo Cusps Virgo - Leo Cusp If you happen to be born during the period of August 21st to the 28th, you're born on the borderline or cusp of the preceding sign of Leo, which is the 5th sign of the zodiac and your own, which is the 6th sign of the zodiac. As such, you are ruled by both the Sun and the planet Mercury. This makes you a person of sunny disposition with a strong intellectual leaning. Being methodical, you're inclined to be a hard worker but unlike the typical Virgo, you have no problem standing out in the limelight and being the centre of attention, taking full credit for anything and everything that you do. With a mixture of Solar and Mercurial energies, you have a unique type of intuition which serves you well. You understand the people you come in touch with through amazing subtle intellectual flashes. You usually trust this. Unfortunately, if you're not recognised for what you do, unlike the typical Virgo of your birth sign, you may start to feel inwardly unfulfilled and frustrated. This will impact on your health adversely so you must find away to bring this part of your nature out into the open so that you don't develop grudges and become a closed off person. You have an unusual blend of extrovert and introvert qualities, which puts you in the perfect position of being able to associate with all sorts of people. There are times when others don't understand you because you swing between these two extremes of your personality. Virgo - Libra Cusp If you were born between the 14th and the 21st of September, you fall in that area of the zodiac that is jointly governed by two star signs - Virgo and Libra. Your ruling sign is ruled by Mercury and Libra by Venus, which astrologically is an excellent combination, endowing you with both intellectual qualities as well as artistic and cultural interests. You are an elegant Virgo, due to the influence of Libra, but also have a shrewd and analytical mind with great powers of perception and intuition. This combined influence endows you with considerable lack as you have the best of both worlds, namely the mental and emotional. To explain a little about Libra is important here as it will endow you with many of the traits of that star sign. First and foremost, Libra needs to be seen to be beautiful and acceptable. Coupled with your predisposition to be highly self - critical, even over minor personality flaws within yourself, means that you could constantly struggle to be accepted by others, not because they don't like you but because you have an erroneous conception about how they see you. Try to accept yourself for who you are and then others will naturally accept you as well. You're attracted to beautiful things and are quite likely a sensual and loving person. You have exotic tastes and love the best in furnishings and as far as personal grooming is concerned, you have a knack for looking really smart and elegant, but will never overdo it with gaudy looking attire. You have a great imagination but have a tendency to stick to yourself. Some people might think that you're elitist and are snubbing your nose up at them, and this is why you need to prove them wrong. You should show those aspects of your personality that are kind, caring and service orientated. Others will soon realise that their judgment of you is rather harsh. You need to be surrounded by quiet and soothing things. You need people in your life who understand you, are peaceful by nature and can share some of the artistic and cultural interests that you do as well. Being ruled by Venus makes you prone to overindulgence in pleasure, food and other activities in life. As Mercury is a sensitive planet you need to be on guard against overdoing things and regulating your life with discipline. Virgo At Large August 24 - September 3 Those Virgos born between the 24th August and 3rd September don't really like to be the centre of attention and can become embarrassed if singled out from the crowd. You are what can be termed the quiet achiever and prefer anonymity to being a show stopper. September 4 - 14 If you're born between the 4th and 14th of September you are a quick thinker, can reach a decisive viewpoint without too much trouble and at times you have moments of intuition that surprise you. Watch that you don't become bogged down in a serious way. September 15 - 23 Between the 15th and 23rd September you are the most sensual of the Virgos as Venus, your co-ruler, brings out this side of your nature. Remaining young and pleasure seeking is far more appealing to you than growing old gracefully. Life for you is to be lived to the fullest. Virgo Child The Virgo child will be inquisitive, exploring their world and interested in learning as much as they possibly can. Intelligence is an attribute of a Virgo child and this will be in evidence very early in their life. Because they have such a desire to learn they can take on too much at a time. Wanting to do everything perfectly can lead to some frustrations so they need to be taught that it's OK to go forward at a lesser pace. Youngsters do not have deadlines and it is their job to be a child as they have the rest of their life to be an adult. Children born under the sign of Virgo have highly developed communication skills. Ample opportunities for learning should be provided for them as they love to learn study and cram as much into their brain as they can. If you want them to be as good as they can be a peaceful nurturing environment is necessary with the tools they need to study what they are interested in. A Virgo child does not like to be badgered or pushed and find their own way to a satisfactory conclusion. They have a tendency to overwork and being highly strung by nature they need sufficient rest and play without mental demands. Learning to have fun is a key ingredient to a balanced life for them. A Virgo child will be slight in build and fragile in childhood. Attention needs to be paid to their diet, hygiene and adequate rest. They can become self-absorbed about their health and there are a large proportion of hypochondriacs born under this sign. As a parent a simple reassurance can do wonders, but you must also do all you can to relieve their concerns about their health. Follow up on anything that is worrying them excessively and they will be reassured that you are taking them seriously. Virgo children can be difficult to understand and sometimes don't mix with their peers easily. Their sensitivity and fault-finding attitudes can alienate them initially as they may feel their friends are not really up to par. Part of the lesson for your Virgo child will be to accept others for their strengths and weaknesses alike and not to be too critical. Virgo Lover If you're a guy who is trying to woo a Virgo love interest, you might be disappointed by this chapter. This woman doesn't plunge into romantic situations at the pace you would like her to. If you're looking for fast love, the Virgo girl is definitely not for you. Unfortunately, when it comes to matters of love, Virgos can be rather detached and analytical in fathoming others as well as their own feelings. They often end up scrutinising people, and a poten- tial partner would need to be on their best behavior to impress Virgo. Are you up to the task? Virgo, the Virgin, embodies deep passion and selfless love, and this is what they bring to a relationship. The question is: Are you patient enough to wait? When it comes to lovemaking, Virgo is playful, passionate and intensely curious, but only under the right circumstances. Another asset is their intense loyalty. Virgo, after all, is one of the most devoted of the star signs. Once they commit themselves to a rela- tionship, that commitment remains steadfast, even in the face of the most excruciating setbacks. It's not easy for them to let go of a relationship, especially if they have invested time, intensity and loyalty. They are as prudent in relationships as they are in matters of finance. At the cost of sounding mercenary, it's crucial to understand that prudence forms the cornerstone of their approach to all aspects of life. Don't be duped by the bashful exterior of a Virgo lover. Mercury, their ruler, is hot by nature, and once you succeed at garnering their trust, the passion they unleash in the bedroom is sure to leave you spellbound. If you want a relationship with Virgo, you need to charm them in a manner that enthralls and fascinates them. Because their Mercurial mind is in constant flux, they desire variety and intellectual stimulation. If you're a slothful couch potato who is uncommunicative and addicted to TV, Virgo is most definitely not your type. Communication, expression and free-flowing dialogue are the bedrock for a successful relationship with those born under this sign. Virgo Friend In matters of friendship, consider yourself blessed if you have a Virgo in your circle of friends. Their compassion, faithfulness and concern for your wellbeing are just a few of Virgo's most beautiful qualities. At the same time, it's not a one way street. They expect some measure of reciprocation for their selfless dedication. Yes, they're unconditional in their love and care, but it's nice to be loved back, isn't it? Virgos can be quite vocal in expressing their opinions, especially if their judgment is solicited. While they are generous in accommod- ating faults, they're blunt in pointing out someone's shortcomings. Due to their intrinsic desire for perfection, they're profusely critical and leave others flabbergasted at the candour with which they expose others. As you can deduce from my description of your Virgo friend, truth is a double-edged sword—for both of you. They may appear distant and emotionally hesitant on occasions, but it's their way of preventing their emotions from being sullied by circumstances. To them, being transparent, honest and unaffected by superfluous issues is important when it comes to drawing conclusions. In friendships they are guarded until comfortable, and they accom- modate all viewpoints, even those that stand in contrast with their own. They can easily adapt to an eclectic mix of people and are a lot of fun. Due to the swift movement of Mercury, relaxed Virgos can be humorous, easygoing and cheerful. In matters of money, don't even attempt to take liberties with your Virgo friend. They see through pretence and smell a rat quicker than you can imagine. They only understand fairness, and if they don't confront you with your scheming ways, their solution is to silently disappear from your life. Don't let this happen as it would be a shame to lose such a trusted ally. Virgo Enemy Virgo enemies don't like to make a public spectacle of their feel- ings towards you. Although exceedingly sharp and communicative, they prefer to repress the negativity and drift away silently. Before they disappear from your life forever, pay attention to when they start to appear diffident and reserved in your presence.Shutdown mode' is usually the first sign that Virgo is becoming your enemy. If you find yourself in this situation, it might be a good idea to reflect on your honesty and faithfulness towards them. Have you slighted them in any way? Remember, Virgo will not put up with disrespect in any form. If you've incurred their wrath, they'll voice their opinion and strip you down to your bare bones. Virgos can be rather vehement when it comes to speaking their mind. If you want to reconcile with them, a sincere apology with candid communication is the first step.   My Light and Shadow The Light and Shadow The light and the dark are part of human nature and each star sign exhibits this polarity. It is the yin and yang of life and once we confront these shadowy areas within ourselves the sooner we are able to break free of all self limiting behaviours and habits. Virgo: The light side Few people are as loyal in friendship as you. This is one of your most admirable traits. When people first meet you, you are aloof and cool, but this is because Virgos are inherently shy. They could even go so far as to think you're looking down your nose at them. But when they get to know you, you endear yourself to them and share the deeper side of your character. Service is one of your most shining qualities, and whether the job is large or small, you see it as an opportunity to create perfection and help others achieve their goals, too. You selflessly give of yourself to help others reach their goals as you gain a quiet, secret pleasure through this. You have wonderful ideas and also have a knack of conveying facts and figures to others who are not as adept at grasping concepts. This makes you an excellent teacher or trainer. You are capable of seeing diverse views in an argument. This makes you impartial and a good judge or mediator when it comes to solving problems. You are seen as a fair individual and your ruling is respected. Virgo: The shadow side Your brilliant mind sometimes gets itself into trouble because of your tendency to be overly critical of both others and yourself. This must be your biggest challenge in life—knowing how to balance faultfinding with constructive criticism. Your achievements are never quite satisfactory to you because you always feel as if you could have done better. Even if others praise you and genuinely believe you're doing a good job, you never accept this, do you? Give yourself some credit. Be a little more gentle on yourself. Virgo is clean and fastidious. Some are even compulsively obsessive. You may not go to this extreme in your hygiene, but the tidiness you impose on others can sometimes alienate you from them. You need to learn the art of relaxation and not worry by things not being in their place. This outer attention to detail, criticism and hygiene is masking some subtle insecurity in your nature, which need to be addressed in due course. If not, this attitude will no doubt act as an obstacle to happy and fulfilling relationships. By overcoming your tense and a highly critical approach you'll find your life so much more satisfying.

virgo and libra

Before being surpassed by Michael Phelps, which American swimmer held the records for most gold medals won during a single Olympics when he won 7 (all world records) in 1972?

September Horoscope | Famous Birthdays 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 September Horoscope The month of September is the 9th month of the Gregorian calendar, but it is also a period of great transition. In September the last days of Summer are spent and the cool Autumn season begins. With the changing leaves and lower temperatures, the autumn equinox takes place. September is also home to many national and international holidays, including, Independence Day, National Grandparents' Day, Mexico's Independence Day and the beginning of Oktoberfest in Germany. The two zodiac signs associated with the month of September are Virgo and Libra. People born from September 1st to September 22nd are members of the Virgo sign. As one of the zodiac's most understanding and caring signs, a Virgo can be easily spotted by their innate compassion. For those born from September 23rd to September 30th, they are members of the Libra sign. Those born under the Libra sign can be identified by their organized and harmony-driven personalities. For more information on those born in Septembers, consult the horoscopes listed below.

i don't know

According to Greek mythology, what was the only virtue that remained in Pandora's Box after she opened it?

PANDORA - The First Woman of Greek Mythology Pandora Epimetheus and the birth of Pandora, Athenian red-figure amphora C5th B.C., Ashmolean Museum PANDORA was the first mortal woman who was formed out of clay by the gods. The Titan Prometheus was once assigned the task of creating the race of man. He afterwards grew displeased with the mean lot imposed on them by the gods and so stole fire from heaven. Zeus was angered and commanded Hephaistos (Hephaestus) and the other gods create the first woman Pandora, endowing her with beauty and cunning. He then had her delivered to Prometheus' foolish younger brother Epimetheus as a bride. Zeus gave Pandora a storage jar (pithos) as a wedding gift which she opened, releasing the swarm of evil spirits trapped within. These would forever after plague mankind. Only Elpis (Hope) remained behind, a single blessing to ease mankind's suffering. Pandora's daughter Pyrrha (Fire) was the first child born of a mortal mother. She and her husband Deukalion (Deucalion) were the sole survivors of the Great Deluge. To repopulate the earth they were instructed to cast stones over their shoulder which formed a new race of men and women. The creation of Pandora was often depicted in ancient Greek vase painting. She appears as either a statue-like figure surrounded by gods, or as a woman rising out of the earth (called the anodos in Greek). Sometimes she is surrounded by dancing Satyroi (Satyrs) in a scene from a lost Satyr-play by Sophokles. FAMILY OF PANDORA PARENTS NONE (created by the gods) (Hesiod Works & Days 54, Hesiod Theogony 560, Aeschylus Frag 204, Sophocles Pandora, Pausanias 1.24.7, Hyginus Fabulae 142) OFFSPRING [1.1] PYRRHA (by Epimetheus ) (Apollodorus 1.46, Hyginus Fabulae 142) [1.2] PYRRHA (Strabo 9.5.23) ENCYCLOPEDIA PANDO′RA (Pandôra), i. e. the giver of all, or endowed with every thing, is the name of the first woman on earth. When Prometheus had stolen the fire from heaven, Zeus in revenge caused Hephaestus to make a woman out of earth, who by her charms and beauty should bring misery upon the human race (Hes. Theog. 571, &c.; Stob. Serin. 1). Aphrodite adorned her with beauty, Hermes gave her boldness and cunning, and the gods called her Pandora, as each of the Olympians had given her some power by which she was to work the ruin of man. Hermes took her to Epimetheus, who forgot the advice of his brother Prometheus, not to accept any gift from Zeus, and from that moment all miseries came down upon men (Hes. Op. et Dies, 50, &c.). According to some mythographers, Epimetheus became by her the father of Pyrrha and Deucalion (Hygin. Fab. 142; Apollod. i. 7. § 2 ; Procl. ad Hes. Op. p. 30, ed. Heinsius; Ov. Met. i. 350); others make Pandora a daughter of Pyrrha and Deucalion (Eustath. ad Hom. p. 23). Later writers speak of a vessel of Pandora, containing all the blessings of the gods, which would have been preserved for the human race, had not Pandora opened the vessel, so that the winged blessings escaped irrecoverably. The birth of Pandora was represented on the pedestal of the statue of Athena, in the Parthenon at Athens (Paus. i. 24. § 7). In the Orphic poems Pandora occurs as an infernal awful divinity, and is associated with Hecate and the Erinnyes (Orph. Argon. 974). Pandora also occurs as a surname of Gaea (Earth), as the giver of all. (Schol. ad Aristoph. Av. 970; Philostr. Vit. Apoll. vi. 39; Hesych. s.v.) Source: Dictionary of Greek and Roman Biography and Mythology. CLASSICAL LITERATURE QUOTES The creation of Pandora, Athenian red-figure kylix C5th B.C., British Museum Hesiod, Works & Days 54 ff (trans. Evelyn-White) (Greek epic C8th or C7th B.C.) : "The gods keep hidden from men the means of life [i.e. fire] . . . Zeus in the anger of his heart hid it, because Prometheus the crafty deceived him; therefore he planned sorrow and mischief against men. He hid fire; but that the noble son of Iapetos stole again for men from Zeus the counsellor in a hollow fennel-stalk, so that Zeus who delights in thunder did not see it. But afterwards Zeus who gathers the clouds said to him in anger : ‘Son of Iapetos, surpassing all in cunning, you are glad that you have outwitted me and stolen fire--a great plague to you yourself and to men that shall be. But I will give men as the price for fire an evil thing in which they may all be glad of heart while they embrace their own destruction.’ So said the father of men and gods, and laughed aloud. And he bade famous Hephaistos (Hephaestus) make haste and mix earth with water and to put in it the voice and strength of human kind, and fashion a sweet, lovely maiden-shape, like to the immortal goddesses in face; and Athene (Athena) to teach her needlework and the weaving of the varied web; and golden Aphrodite to shed grace upon her head and cruel longing and cares that weary the limbs. And he charged Hermes the guide, the Slayer of Argos, to put in her a shameless mind and a deceitful nature. So he ordered. And they obeyed the lord Zeus the son of Kronos (Cronus). Forthwith [Hephaistos] the famous Lame God moulded clay in the likeness of a modest maid, as the son of Kronos purposed. And the goddess bright-eyed Athene girded and clothed her, and the divine Kharites (Charites, Graces) and queenly Peitho (Persuasion) put necklaces of gold upon her, and the rich-haired Horai (Horae, Seasons) crowned her head with spring flowers. And Pallas Athene bedecked her form with all manners of finery. Also [Hermes] the Guide, the Slayer of Argos, contrived within her lies and crafty words and a deceitful nature at the will of loud thundering Zeus, and the Herald of the gods put speech in her. And he called this woman Pandora (All-Gifts), because all they who dwelt on Olympos gave each a gift, a plague to men who eat bread. But when he had finished the sheer, hopeless snare, the Father sent glorious Argus-Slayer [Hermes], the swift messenger of the gods, to take it to Epimetheus as a gift. And Epimetheus did not think on what Prometheus had said to him, bidding him never take a gift of Olympian Zeus, but to send it back for fear it might prove to be something harmful to men. But he took the gift, and afterwards, when the evil thing was already his, he understood. For ere this the tribes of men lived on earth remote and free from ills (kakoi) and hard toil (ponoi) and heavy sickness (nosoi) which bring the Keres (Fates) upon men; for in misery men grow old quickly. But the woman took off the great lid of the jar (pithos) with her hands and scattered all these and her thought caused sorrow and mischief to men. Only Elpis (Hope) remained there in an unbreakable home within under the rim of the great jar, and did not fly out at the door; for ere that, the lid of the jar stopped her, by the will of Aigis-holding Zeus who gathers the clouds. But the rest, countless plagues (lugra), wander amongst men; for earth is full of evils and the sea is full. Of themselves diseases (nosoi) come upon men continually by day and by night, bringing mischief to mortals silently; for wise Zeus took away speech from them. So is there no way to escape the will of Zeus." Hesiod, Theogony 510 ff (trans. Evelyn-White) (Greek epic C8th or C7th B.C.) : "Scatter-brained Epimetheus who from the first was a mischief to men who eat bread; for it was he who first took of Zeus the woman [i.e. Pandora], the maiden whom he had formed." Hesiod, Theogony 560 ff : "[Zeus] was always mindful of the trick [of Prometheus, who had won for mankind the meat of the sacrificial beast,], and would not give the power of unwearying fire to the Melian race of mortal men who live on the earth. But [Prometheus] the noble son of Iapetos outwitted him and stole the far-seen gleam of unwearying fire in a hollow fennel stalk. And Zeus who thunders on high was stung in spirit, and his dear heart was angered when he saw amongst men the far-seen ray of fire. Forthwith he made an evil thing for men as the price of fire; for the very famous Limping God [Hephaistos (Hephaestus)] formed of earth the likeness of a shy maiden [i.e. Pandora] as [Zeus] the son of Kronos (Cronus) willed. And the goddess bright-eyed Athene (Athena) girded and clothed her with silvery raiment, and down from her head she spread with her hands an embroidered veil, a wonder to see; and she, Pallas Athene, put about her head lovely garlands, flowers of new-grown herbs. Also she put upon her head a crown of gold which [Hephaistos] the very famous Limping God made himself and worked with his own hands as a favor to Zeus his father. On it was much curious work, wonderful to see; for of the many creatures which the land and sea rear up, he put most upon it, wonderful things, like living beings with voices : and great beauty shone out from it. But when he had made the beautiful evil to be the price for the blessing, he brought her out, delighting in the finery which the bright-eyed daughter of a mighty father had given her, to the place where the other gods and men were. And wonder took hold of the deathless gods and mortal men when they saw that which was sheer guile, not to be withstood by men. For from her is the race of women and female kind: of her is the deadly race and tribe of women who live amongst mortal men to their great trouble, no helpmeets in hateful poverty, but only in wealth. And as in thatched hives bees feed the drones whose nature is to do mischief--by day and throughout the day until the sun goes down the bees are busy and lay the white combs, while the drones stay at home in the covered hives and reap the toil of others into their own bellies--even so Zeus who thunders on high made women to be an evil to mortal men, with a nature to do evil. And he gave them a second evil to be the price for the good they had: whoever avoids marriage and the sorrows that women cause, and will not wed, reaches deadly old age without anyone to tend his years, and though he at least has no lack of livelihood while he lives, yet, when he is dead, his kinsfolk divide his possessions amongst them. And as for the man who chooses the lot of marriage and takes a good wife suited to his mind, evil continually contends with good; for whoever happens to have mischievous children, lives always with unceasing grief in his spirit and heart within him; and this evil cannot be healed. So it is not possible to deceive or go beyond the will of Zeus: for not even the son of Iapetos, kindly Prometheus, escaped his heavy anger, but of necessity strong bands confined him, although he knew many a wile." The creation of Pandora, Athenian red-figure calyx krater C5th B.C., British Museum Homer, The Iliad 24. 527 ff (trans. Lattimore) (Greek epic C8th B.C.) : "There are two urns (pithoi) that stand on the door-sill of Zeus. They are unlike for the gifts they bestow: an urn of evils (kakoi), an urn of blessings (dôroi). If Zeus who delights in thunder mingles these and bestows them on man, he shifts, and moves now in evil, again in good fortune. But when Zeus bestows from the urn of sorrows, he makes a failure of man, and hte evil hunger drives him over the shining earth, and he wanders resepected neither of gods nor mortals." [N.B. Later writers say that Zeus gave one of these two jars to Pandora. The poets were at odds as to which jar she received--Hesiod says it was the jar of evils (kakoi), but Theognis and Aesop claim it was the jar of blessings (dôroi). The name Pan-dôra ("all-gifts") perhaps suggests the latter.] Theognis, Fragment 1. 1135 (trans. Gerber, Vol. Greek Elegiac) (Greek elegy C6th B.C.) : "Elpis (Hope) is the only good god remaining among mankind; the others have left and gone to Olympos. Pistis (Trust), a mighty god has gone, Sophrosyne (Restraint) has gone from men, and the Kharites (Charites, Graces), my friend, have abandoned the earth. Men's judicial oaths are no longer to be trusted, nor does anyone revere the immortal gods; the race of pious men has perished and men no longer recognize the rules of conduct or acts of piety." [N.B. Theognis' account is the reverse of Hesiod's--the good spirits escape from Pandora's jar, abandoning mankind in their flight back to heaven.] Aesop, Fables 526 (from Babrius 58) (trans. Gibbs) (Greek fable C6th B.C.) : "Zeus gathered all the useful things together in a jar and put a lid on it. He then left the jar in human hands. But man had no self-control and he wanted to know what was in that jar, so he pushed the lid aside, letting those things go back to the abode of the gods. So all the good things flew away, soaring high above the earth, and Elpis (Hope) was the only thing left. When the lid was put back on the jar, Elpis (Hope) was kept inside. That is why Elpis (Hope) alone is still found among the people, promising that she will bestow on each of us the good things that have gone away." [N.B. "Human hands" alludes to the story of Pandora who delivered the jar to mankind. In this version, however, it is apparently her husband who opens it.] Aesop, Fables 525 (from Chambry 1) (trans. Gibbs) (Greek fable C6th B.C.) : "The Good Things were too weak to defend themselves from the Bad Things, so the Bad Things drove them off to heaven. The Good Things then asked Zeus how they could reach mankind. Zeus told them that they should not go together all at once, only one at a time. This is why people are constantly besieged by Bad Things, since they are nearby, while Good Things come more rarely, since they must descend to us from heaven one by one." [N.B. This fable describes the spirits which had escaped from Pandora's jar. It also refers to the two jars set beside the throne of Zeus in the Iliad--one containing Good Things and the other Evils.] Epimetheus, Pandora and Eros (detail), Athenian red-figure amphora C5th B.C., Ashmolean Museum Aeschylus, Prometheus Bound 250 ff (trans. Weir Smyth) (Greek tragedy C5th B.C.) : "Prometheus : Yes, I caused mortals to cease foreseeing their doom (moros). Chorus : Of what sort was the cure that you found for this affliction? Prometheus : I caused blind hopes (elpides) to dwell within their breasts. Chorus : A great benefit was this you gave to mortals." [N.B. This is presumably a reference to Pandora's jar--a curse concocted by Zeus to punish mankind for the theft of fire. Prometheus seems to be saying that he was the one who stayed Hope inside the jar when all the other spirits escaped.] Aeschylus, Fragment 204 (from Proclus, Commentary on Hesiod's Works and Days 156) : "A mortal woman from out a seed moulded of clay [i.e Pandora]." Sophocles, Pandora (lost play) (C5th B.C.) : Sophocles wrote a Satyr-play entitled Pandora or Sphyrocopi which dramatised the story of the first woman. Plato, Protagoras 320c - 322a (trans. Lamb) (Greek philosopher C4th B.C.) : "Prometheus stole the mechanical arts of Hephaistos (Hephaestus) and Athene (Athena), and fire with them (they could neither have been acquired nor used without fire), and gave them to man . . . But Prometheus is said to have been afterwards prosecuted for theft, owing to the blunder of Epimetheus [i.e. because he accepted Pandora from Zeus]." Pseudo-Apollodorus, Bibliotheca 1. 46 (trans. Aldrich) (Greek mythographer C2nd A.D.) : "Prometheus had a son Deukalion (Deucalion), who was king of the lands round Phthia and was married to Pyrrha, the daughter of Epimetheus and Pandora, the first woman created by the gods." Euphorion of Chalcis, Fragments (trans. Page, Vol. Select Papyri III, No. 121 (2b)) (Greek epic C3rd B.C.) : "Pandora, donor of evil (kakodôros), man's sorrow self-imposed." Strabo, Geography 9. 5. 23 (trans. Jones) (Greek geographer C1st B.C. to C1st A.D.) : "[The region of] Thessalia (Thessaly). But speaking of it as a whole, I may say that in earlier times it was called Pyrrhaia (Pyrrhaea), after Pyrrha the wife of Deukalion (Deucalion) . . . But some writers, dividing it into two parts, say that Deukalion obtained the portion towards the south and called it Pandora after his mother [i.e. his mother-in-law], and that the other part fell to Haimon (Haemon), after whom it was called Haimonia (Haemonia), but that the former name was changed to Hellas, after Hellen the son of Deukalion, and the latter to Thessalia, after the son of Haimon." [N.B. Pyrrha was the daughter of Pandora and wife of Deukalion. Deukalion named various parts of Thessalia after his wife and mother-in-law.] Pausanias, Description of Greece 1. 24. 7 (trans. Jones) (Greek travelogue C2nd A.D.) : "On the pedestal [of the statue of Athena on the Akropolis in Athens] is the birth of Pandora in relief. Hesiod and others have sung how this Pandora was the first woman; before Pandora was born there was as yet no womankind." Pseudo-Hyginus, Fabulae 142 (trans. Grant) (Roman mythographer C2nd A.D.) : "Prometheus, son of Iapetus, first fashioned men from clay. Later Vulcanus [Hephaistos], at Jove's [Zeus'] command, made a woman's form from clay. Minerva [Athene] gave it life, and the rest of the gods each gave come other gift. Because of this they named her Pandora. She was given in marriage to Prometheus' brother Epimetheus. Pyrrha was her daughter, and was said to be the first mortal born." Nonnus, Dionysiaca 7. 7 ff (trans. Rouse) (Greek epic C5th A.D.) : "[Aion (Time) addresses Zeus :] ‘But, some may say, a medicine [Hope] has been planted to make long-suffering mortals forget their troubles, to save their lives. Would that Pandora had never opened the heavenly cover of that jar--she the sweet bane of mankind!’" ANCIENT GREEK ART

Hope

The piece of cartilage which divides the nose into two separate chambers is called what?

Myth of Pandora, the first woman on Earth - Greeka.com Discover the myth of Pandora, the first woman The creation of Pandora All started from a gathering of the gods, where the Titans were also invited. The gathering had been organized to decide who would be favored with the better portion of a sacrifice. Prometheus, the Titan who later stole the fire from the Gods and gave it to humanity, had deviously presented the sacrifice in such a manner that Zeus chose the portion that looked more appealing when in fact it was just bones presented in a tempting manner. Outraged at this mockery, Zeus decided to take revenge and get even with Prometheus. Zeus charged Hephaestus, the god of smiths and master of crafts, with creating a dazzlingly beautiful woman, one that would appear irresistible to either god or man. To accomplish this feat Aphrodite, the goddess of love, posed as a model for the creation of the statue. The woman was molded of earth and water and once the body was ready, the Four Winds breathed life into it. She was then given gifts from all the Olympian gods. Aphrodite gave to her unparalleled beauty, grace and desire. Hermes, the messenger god, gave her a cunning, deceitful mind and a crafty tongue. Athena clothed her and taught her to be deft with her hands. Poseidon bestowed on her a pearl necklace that would prevent her from drowning. Apollo taught her to play the lyre and to sing. Zeus gave her a foolish, mischievous and idle nature and last but not least, Hera gave her the wiliest gift, curiosity. Thus, the first mortal woman was born and she descended down to earth. Her name was Pandora, meaning all-gifted, implying all the gifts she had received from gods. Along with her, Hermes gave a gilded and intricately carved box, a gift from Zeus with an explicit warning that she must never open it, come what may. Draped in raiment fit for the gods, she was presented to Epimetheus, Prometheus' half-brother. Opening the box Epimetheus had been told by his brother never to accept any gift from Zeus. Prometheus was well aware that Zeus was still angry with him for his effrontery at the gathering and would try to get his revenge. However, one look at Pandora was all it took for Epimetheus to fall in crazy love with her and marry her without thought or consideration. He was truly enchanted with her. To congratulate them, Hermes came to the wedding ceremony and told Epimetheus that Pandora was a gift from Zeus, a peace-offer signifying that there were no more ill feelings between the chief of the gods and Prometheus. He also told Epimetheus that the gilded box of Pandora was a wedding gift from the Olympian King. Being a bit credulous, Epimetheus believed the words of Hermes to be true. Unfortunately, Prometheus' advice had fallen on deaf ears. The days were passing quickly and the two were leading a happy, married life but one thought was still at the back of Pandora's mind: what was in the box that Zeus had given her? She kept thinking that maybe the box had money in it, nice clothes or even jewelry. Without thought or reason, she would find herself walking past the box and involuntarily reaching out to open it. Every time, she was reminding herself that she had vowed never to open the box. Hera's gift of curiosity had worked and one day, unable to take it any more, she decided to have just a brief look inside. When nobody was around, she fitted a golden key hanging around her neck to the lock on the box. Turning the key slowly, she unlocked the box and lifted the lid only for a while. Before she knew it, there was a hissing sound and a horrible odor permeated the air around her. Terrified, she slammed the lid down but it was too late. Pandora had released all the wickedness and malevolence that Zeus had locked into the box. That time, she understood that she was a mere pawn in a great game played by the gods. In that gilded box, Zeus had hidden all everything that would plague man forever: sickness, death, turmoil, strife, jealousy, hatred, famine, passion... everywhere the evil spread. Pandora felt the weight of the world on her shoulders and looked at the gilded box that had turned rusty and hideous. As if sensing her need, a warm and calming feeling shrouded her and she knew that not all was lost. Unknown to her, along with the evil feelings, she had also revealed hope, the only good thing that Zeus had trapped inside the box. From now on, hole would live with man forever, to give him succor just when he felt that everything was coming to an end. Pandora's Box The modern phrase "Pandora's Box" derives from this myth. It is used to say that a certain action provoked many evils, just like Pandora's action to open the box released all the evils of humanity. However, despite these evils, we humans still have hope to encourage us. This phrase was produced by the Dutch humanist and theologian Erasmus of Rotterdam in the 16th century, when he translated the poem of Hesiod. Pandora and Eve In this myth, we can observe some similarities with the Christian story of Adam and Eve. Just like Pandora in ancient Greece, Eve was known as the first woman on earth in Hebrew history. Even the creation of the two women is similar: Pandora was made of earth and water and Eve from the rib of Adam, the first man on earth, who was in his turn made of slay. Another similarity is that they both disobeyed god: Pandora opened the box and unleashed evil in the world and Eve tempted Adam to eat the forbidden apple, against God's will. Some accounts maintain that Pandora tempted Epimetheus into opening the box. However, both women brought ruin and misfortune upon men who had so far lived in a paradisiacal world, free from all sins. Pandora and Eve are considered as the progenitors of the human race and because of their curiosity, the world is cursed today. Interestingly, Pandora was created with vicious intentions but not so Eve, who was simply created to be Adam's companion. The treachery lay in the role of Hermes and the Snake respectively. In Pandora, Hermes instilled that she must never open the box and had Hera not gifted her curiosity, it may have remained closed forever. In the Garden of Eden, the Snake tempted Eve to eat the forbidden fruit from the Tree of Knowledge and Life, bringing about realization and shame. From these two stories, we can imply that women have forever been seen as perpetrators of all that is deceitful and therefore women are to blame for every evil on this world. Share it!  

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On September 8, 1974, Gerald Ford issued Proclamation 4311 granting a pardon, for crimes that may have been committed, to whom?

The History Place - Great Speeches Collection: President Gerald Ford Speech - Pardoning Richard Nixon On September 8, 1974, one month after President Richard Nixon resigned the presidency amid the Watergate scandal, his successor, President Gerald R. Ford, announced his decision to grant Nixon a full pardon for any crimes he may have committed while in office. Page 1 of the Pardon   Page 2 of the Pardon The Watergate scandal stemmed from a break-in that occurred on the night of June 17, 1972, when five burglars entered the Democratic National Committee offices at the Watergate office complex in Washington, D.C. Subsequent investigations revealed the burglars were actually agents hired by Nixon's Committee to Re-elect the President. A long chain of events then followed in which the President and top aides became involved in an extensive coverup of White House-sanctioned illegal political activities. The coverup snowballed as Nixon and White House aides attempted to use the prestige and power of the presidency to obstruct justice. After a two-year battle against the news media, government agencies, the U.S. Senate and House of Representatives and the U.S. Supreme Court, Nixon wound up resigning amid the likelihood that he would not survive a full impeachment vote in the Congress. President Ford's subsequent decision to pardon Nixon eliminated the possibility of a humiliated private citizen Nixon going on trial. The decision to pardon Nixon also likely ended Ford's chances for re-election to the presidency in 1976. Both the decision and its timing came under severe criticism. The pardon was announced by Ford on a Sunday morning, taking advantage of an off-beat time for Washington newsmakers in an attempt to minimize the initial political fallout. It was a vain attempt, however, as the decision caused a firestorm of anger in the press and indignation among those who wanted to see Nixon go on trial and possibly to jail. But among others, the decision evoked sympathy for Nixon, the only President ever to resign. Many saw Nixon as a victim of political infighting in Washington and considered much of Nixon's behavior to be no worse than that of his predecessors in the Oval Office. The result was a further polarization of a nation already traumatized by the events surrounding Watergate. Years later, Nixon made somewhat of a comeback, writing books and granting TV interviews commenting on Watergate and international politics. By contrast, Gerald Ford was destined to obscurity after losing the 1976 election to Jimmy Carter. Listen to an excerpt Ladies and gentlemen: I have come to a decision which I felt I should tell you and all of my fellow American citizens, as soon as I was certain in my own mind and in my own conscience that it is the right thing to do. I have learned already in this office that the difficult decisions always come to this desk. I must admit that many of them do not look at all the same as the hypothetical questions that I have answered freely and perhaps too fast on previous occasions. My customary policy is to try and get all the facts and to consider the opinions of my countrymen and to take counsel with my most valued friends. But these seldom agree, and in the end, the decision is mine. To procrastinate, to agonize, and to wait for a more favorable turn of events that may never come or more compelling external pressures that may as well be wrong as right, is itself a decision of sorts and a weak and potentially dangerous course for a President to follow. I have promised to uphold the Constitution, to do what is right as God gives me to see the right, and to do the very best that I can for America. I have asked your help and your prayers, not only when I became President but many times since. The Constitution is the supreme law of our land and it governs our actions as citizens. Only the laws of God, which govern our consciences, are superior to it. As we are a nation under God, so I am sworn to uphold our laws with the help of God. And I have sought such guidance and searched my own conscience with special diligence to determine the right thing for me to do with respect to my predecessor in this place, Richard Nixon, and his loyal wife and family. Theirs is an American tragedy in which we all have played a part. It could go on and on and on, or someone must write the end to it. I have concluded that only I can do that, and if I can, I must. There are no historic or legal precedents to which I can turn in this matter, none that precisely fit the circumstances of a private citizen who has resigned the Presidency of the United States. But it is common knowledge that serious allegations and accusations hang like a sword over our former President's head, threatening his health as he tries to reshape his life, a great part of which was spent in the service of this country and by the mandate of its people. After years of bitter controversy and divisive national debate, I have been advised, and I am compelled to conclude that many months and perhaps more years will have to pass before Richard Nixon could obtain a fair trial by jury in any jurisdiction of the United States under governing decisions of the Supreme Court. I deeply believe in equal justice for all Americans, whatever their station or former station. The law, whether human or divine, is no respecter of persons; but the law is a respecter of reality. The facts, as I see them, are that a former President of the United States, instead of enjoying equal treatment with any other citizen accused of violating the law, would be cruelly and excessively penalized either in preserving the presumption of his innocence or in obtaining a speedy determination of his guilt in order to repay a legal debt to society. During this long period of delay and potential litigation, ugly passions would again be aroused. And our people would again be polarized in their opinions. And the credibility of our free institutions of government would again be challenged at home and abroad. In the end, the courts might well hold that Richard Nixon had been denied due process, and the verdict of history would even be more inconclusive with respect to those charges arising out of the period of his Presidency, of which I am presently aware. But it is not the ultimate fate of Richard Nixon that most concerns me, though surely it deeply troubles every decent and every compassionate person. My concern is the immediate future of this great country. In this, I dare not depend upon my personal sympathy as a longtime friend of the former President, nor my professional judgment as a lawyer, and I do not. As President, my primary concern must always be the greatest good of all the people of the United States whose servant I am. As a man, my first consideration is to be true to my own convictions and my own conscience. My conscience tells me clearly and certainly that I cannot prolong the bad dreams that continue to reopen a chapter that is closed. My conscience tells me that only I, as President, have the constitutional power to firmly shut and seal this book. My conscience tells me it is my duty, not merely to proclaim domestic tranquility but to use every means that I have to insure it. I do believe that the buck stops here, that I cannot rely upon public opinion polls to tell me what is right. I do believe that right makes might and that if I am wrong, ten angels swearing I was right would make no difference. I do believe, with all my heart and mind and spirit, that I, not as President but as a humble servant of God, will receive justice without mercy if I fail to show mercy. Finally, I feel that Richard Nixon and his loved ones have suffered enough and will continue to suffer, no matter what I do, no matter what we, as a great and good nation, can do together to make his goal of peace come true. Now, therefore, I, Gerald R. Ford, President of the United States, pursuant to the pardon power conferred upon me by Article II, Section 2, of the Constitution, have granted and by these presents do grant a full, free, and absolute pardon unto Richard Nixon for all offenses against the United States which he, Richard Nixon, has committed or may have committed or taken part in during the period from July (January) 20, 1969, through August 9, 1974. In witness whereof, I have hereunto set my hand this eighth day of September, in the year of our Lord nineteen hundred and seventy-four, and of the Independence of the United States of America the one hundred and ninety-ninth. President Gerald R. Ford - September 8, 1974

Richard Nixon

Letter, Legal, ledger, and Tabloid are all types of what?

Gerald Ford - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Your continued donations keep Wikipedia running!     Gerald Ford This article is about the U.S. president. For the banker, see Gerald J. Ford . Gerald Rudolph Ford, Jr. Episcopalian Signature Gerald Rudolph Ford, Jr., (born Leslie Lynch King Jr. on July 14 , 1913 ) was the 38th (1974–1977) President of the United States . Ford also served as the 40th (1973–1974) Vice President . He was the first person appointed to the Vice-Presidency under the terms of the 25th Amendment , and upon succession to the presidency became the first (and to date, only) president in U.S. history to fill that office without having been elected either President or Vice-President. He is also the longest-lived United States president ever, having surpassed Ronald Reagan 's record on November 12, 2006. Ford was born in Omaha, Nebraska . He was originally named Leslie Lynch King, Jr., after his biological father. His parents divorced when he was less than a year old, and when his mother remarried, he was given the name of his step-father, Gerald Rudolff Ford. He later changed the spelling of the middle name. Ford obtained his bachelor's degree from the University of Michigan , where he was a football star. He went on to obtain a law degree from Yale University before serving in the United States Navy during World War II . Returning from the war a confirmed "internationalist", Republican Ford defeated the incumbent in the party primary and was elected to the United States House of Representatives in 1948, representing the Grand Rapids, Michigan area. He was elected House Minority Leader in 1963 and served in the House until 1973. When Spiro Agnew resigned, Ford was appointed Vice President of the United States at the height of the Watergate scandal , which eventually led to Nixon's resignation. The Ford administration saw the withdrawal of American forces from Vietnam , the execution of the Helsinki Accords , and the continuing specter of inflation and recession . Faced with an overwhelmingly Democratic majority in Congress , the administration was hampered in its ability to pass major legislation, and Ford's vetoes were frequently overridden. Ford was criticized by many for granting a pre-emptive pardon to Nixon, and was subsequently defeated by Democrat Jimmy Carter in the 1976 presidential election . Contents [ edit ] Early life Ford with his pet Boston Terrier , 1916 Ford was born in Omaha, Nebraska on Monday, July 14, 1913 at 12:43 AM CST to Leslie Lynch King and Dorothy Ayer Gardner, and was originally named Leslie Lynch King, Jr. His parents separated before he was born and divorced five months after his birth; he is the only President whose parents have been divorced. Two years later, his mother married Gerald Ford, after whom he was renamed despite never being formally adopted . Raised in Grand Rapids, Michigan , Ford was not aware of his adoption until shortly before turning fifteen. "My stepfather was a magnificent person," Ford stated, "and my mother equally wonderful. So I couldn't have written a better prescription for a superb family upbringing." [1] Ford joined the Boy Scouts and attained that program's highest rank, Eagle Scout . He always regarded this as one of his proudest accomplishments, even after attaining the White House . [2] In subsequent years, Ford received the Distinguished Eagle Scout Award and Silver Buffalo from the Boy Scouts of America. He attended Grand Rapids South High School and was a star athlete, rising to become captain of his high school football team. In 1930, he was selected to the All-City team of the Grand Rapids City League . He also attracted the attention of college recruiters. [3] Attending the University of Michigan as an undergraduate, Ford became the center for the school's football team and helped the Wolverines to undefeated seasons in 1932 and 1933. His number 48 jersey has since been retired by the school. At Michigan, Ford was a member of the Delta Kappa Epsilon fraternity and washed dishes at his fraternity house to earn money to pay for college expenses. While at Michigan, Ford turned down contract offers from the Detroit Lions and Green Bay Packers of the National Football League following his graduation in 1935 in order to attend law school. [4] As part of the 1935 Collegiate All-Star football team, Ford played against the Chicago Bears in an exhibition game at Soldier Field . [5] I'm a Ford, not a Lincoln. —Gerald R. Ford, December 1973 [6] While attending Yale Law School , he joined a group of students led by R. Douglas Stuart, Jr., and signed a petition to enforce the 1939 Neutrality Act . The petition was circulated nationally and was the inspiration for America First , a group determined to keep America out of World War II . [7] Ford's position on American involvement in the war would soon change. Ford graduated from law school in 1941 and was admitted to the Michigan bar shortly thereafter. Before he could commence a law practice, though, overseas developments caused a change in plans. Like others, Ford responded to the attack on Pearl Harbor and joined the military. [8] [ edit ] Naval Service in World War II Ford in uniform, 1945 Ford received a commission as ensign in the U.S. Naval Reserve on 13 April 1942. On 20 April, he reported for active duty to the V-5 instructor school at Annapolis, Maryland . After one month of training, he went to Navy Preflight School in Chapel Hill, North Carolina , where he was one of 83 instructors and taught elementary seamanship, ordnance, gunnery, first aid, and military drill. In addition, he coached in all nine sports that were offered, but mostly in swimming, boxing and football. During the one year, he was at the Preflight School, he was promoted to Lieutenant Junior Grade on 2 June 1942, and to Lieutenant on March 1943. Applying for sea duty, Ford was sent in May 1943 to the pre-commissioning detachment for a new small aircraft carrier, the USS Monterey , at New York Shipbuilding Corporation, Camden, New Jersey . From the ship's commissioning on 17 June 1943 until the end of December 1944, Ford served as the assistant navigator, Athletic Officer, and antiaircraft battery officer on board the Monterey. While he was on board, the Monterey participated in many actions in the Pacific with the Third and Fifth Fleets during the fall of 1943 and in 1944. In 1943, the carrier helped secure Makin Island in the Gilberts, and participated in carrier strikes against Kavieng , New Ireland in 1943. During the spring of 1944, the Monterey supported landings at Kwajalein and Eniwetok and participated in carrier strikes in the Marianas , Western Carolines , and northern New Guinea , as well as in the Battle of Philippine Sea . After overhaul, from September to November 1944, aircraft from the Monterey launched strikes against Wake Island , participated in strikes in the Philippines and Ryukus, and supported the landings at Leyte and Mindoro . Although the ship was not damaged by the Japanese forces, the Monterey was one of several ships damaged by the typhoon which hit Admiral William Halsey 's Third Fleet on 18-19 December 1944. The Third Fleet lost three destroyers and over 800 men during the typhoon. The Monterey was damaged by a fire, which was started by several of the ship's aircraft tearing loose from their cables and colliding during the storm. During the storm, Ford narrowly missed being a casualty himself. After Ford left his battle station on the bridge of the ship in the early morning of 18 December, the ship rolled twenty-five degrees which caused Ford to lose his footing and slide toward the edge of the deck. The two inch steel ridge around the edge of the carrier slowed him enough so he could roll and twisted into the catwalk below the deck. As he later stated, "I was lucky; I could have easily gone overboard." After the fire, the Monterey was declared unfit for service and the crippled carrier reached Ulithi on 21 December before proceding across the Pacific to Bremerton, Washington where it underwent repairs. On Christmas Eve 1944 at Ulithi, Ford was detached from the ship and sent to the Athletic Department of the Navy Pre-Flight School, at Saint Mary's College of California where he was assigned to the Athletic Department until April 1945. One of his duties was to coach football. From end of April 1945 to January 1946, he was on the staff of the Naval Reserve Training Command, Naval Air Station, Glenview, Illinois as the Staff Physical and Military Training Officer. On 3 October 1945, he was promoted to Lieutenant Commander. In January 1946, he was sent to the Separation Center, Great Lakes, Illinois to be processed out. He was released from active duty under honorable conditions on 23 February 1946. On 28 June 1963, the Secretary of the Navy accepted Ford's resignation from the Naval Reserve. For his naval service, Gerald Ford earned the Asiatic-Pacific Campaign Medal with nine engagement stars for operations in the Gilbert Islands , Bismark Archipelego, Marshal Islands , Asiatic and Pacific carrier raids, Hollandia, Marianas, Western Carolines, Western New Guinea, and the Leyte Operation. He also received the Philippine Liberation with two bronze stars for Leyte and Mindoro, as well as the American Campaign and World War II Victory Medals. [9] [ edit ] Marriage and family See also: Betty Ford On October 15 , 1948 , Ford married Betty Bloomer Warren at Grace Episcopal Church , in Grand Rapids. This was Mrs. Ford's second marriage. The Fords had four children: Michael Ford (b. 1950), a minister; John "Jack" Ford (b. 1952), a journalist/public relations consultant; Steven Ford (b. 1956), an actor and rodeo rider; [10] and Susan (Ford) Vance Bales (b. 1957), a photographer. Mrs. Ford was noted for her outspokenness on topics, including pre-marital sex and the Equal Rights Amendment . This was a sharp contrast from most First Ladies , particularly her immediate predecessor, the reticent Pat Nixon . Mrs. Ford publicly battled breast cancer during her husband's presidency. After leaving office, her battles with alcoholism and addiction were discussed prominently in the media, as was the family's support in opening the Betty Ford Center in Rancho Mirage, California . [11] [ edit ] House of Representatives Campaign billboard from 1948 election Following his return from the war, Ford became active in local Republican politics. Grand Rapids supporters urged him to take on Bartel J. Jonkman , the incumbent Republican congressman. Ford had changed his worldview as a result of his military service; "I came back a converted internationalist", Ford stated, "and of course our congressman at that time was an avowed, dedicated isolationist. And I thought he ought to be replaced. Nobody thought I could win. I ended up winning two to one." [1] During his first campaign, Ford visited farmers and promised he would work on their farms and milk the cows if elected—a promise he fulfilled. [12] In 1961, the U.S. House membership voted Ford a special award as a "Congressman's Congressman" that praised his committee work on military budgets. [13] Ford meets with President Richard Nixon as House Minority Leader . Ford was a member of the House of Representatives for twenty-four years, holding the Grand Rapids congressional district seat from 1949 to 1973. Appointed to the House Appropriations Committee two years after being elected, he was a prominent member of the Defense Appropriations Subcommittee. Ford described his philosophy as "a moderate in domestic affairs, an internationalist in foreign affairs, and a conservative in fiscal policy." [14] In 1963, Republican members of the House elected him Minority Leader . During his tenure, President Lyndon B. Johnson appointed Ford to the Warren Commission , a special task force set up to investigate the assassination of President John F. Kennedy . The Commission's conclusion that Lee Harvey Oswald had acted alone in killing the President remains controversial. During the eight years (1965–1973) he served as Minority Leader, Ford won many friends in the House because of his fair leadership and inoffensive personality. [13] But President Johnson disliked Ford for the congressman's frequent attacks on the administration's " Great Society " programs as being unneeded or wasteful, and for his criticism of the President's handling of the Vietnam War . As minority leader in the House, Ford appeared in a popular series of televised press conferences with famed Illinois Senator Everett Dirksen in which they proposed Republican alternatives to Johnson's policies. Many in the press jokingly called this "The Ev and Jerry Show". [15] In 1970, Ford led the effort to impeach William O. Douglas , an associate justice on the Supreme Court , for "moonlighting" for private clients. [16] [ edit ] Vice Presidency, 1973–74 After Vice President Spiro Agnew resigned during Richard Nixon 's presidency October 10 , 1973 , Nixon nominated Ford to take Agnew's position on October 12 ; this was the first time that the Vice-Presidential vacancy provision of the 25th Amendment had been applied. The United States Senate voted 92 to 3 to confirm Ford on November 27 , and on December 6 the House confirmed him 387 to 35. Ford's tenure as Vice President was little noted by the media. Instead, reporters were preoccupied by the continuing revelations about criminal acts during the 1972 Presidential elections and allegations of cover-ups within the White House . Ford said little about the Watergate scandal , although he privately expressed his personal disappointment in the President's conduct. [17] I have not sought this enormous responsibility, but I will not shirk it. Those who nominated and confirmed me as Vice President were my friends and are my friends. They were of both parties, elected by all the people and acting under the Constitution in their name. It is only fitting then that I should pledge to them and to you that I will be the President of all the people. —Gerald R. Ford, August 9 , 1974 [6] The Watergate investigation continued following Ford's appointment until Chief of Staff, Alexander Haig contacted Ford on August 1 , 1974 , and told him that " smoking gun " evidence had been found. The evidence left little doubt that President Nixon had been a part of the Watergate cover-up. Ford at the time was continuing to reside in the same home he had as a congressman and was waiting on repairs before becoming the first Vice President to move into the new Vice President's official residence at Number One Observatory Circle . However, "Al Haig [asked] to come over and see me," Ford later related, "to tell me that there would be a new tape released on a Monday, and he said the evidence in there was devastating and there would probably be either an impeachment or a resignation. And he said, 'I'm just warning you that you've got to be prepared, that things might change dramatically and you could become President.' And I said, 'Betty [Ford, his wife], I don't think we're ever going to live in the Vice President's house.'" [1] [ edit ] Presidency, 1974–77 —Gerald R. Ford', August 9 , 1974 . [18] Vice President Ford is sworn in as the 38th President of the United States by Chief Justice Warren Burger as Mrs. Ford looks on. When Nixon resigned in the wake of the Watergate scandal on August 9 , 1974 , Ford assumed the presidency. Immediately after taking the oath of office in the East Room of the White House , he spoke to the assembled audience in a speech broadcast live to the nation. Ford noted the peculiarity of his position: "I am acutely aware that you have not elected me as your President by your ballots, and so I ask you to confirm me as your President with your prayers." [18] On August 20 Ford nominated former New York Governor Nelson Rockefeller to fill the Vice Presidency he had vacated. Rockefeller was confirmed by the House and Senate. [19] [ edit ] Nixon pardon On September 8 , 1974 , Ford gave Nixon a full and unconditional pardon for any crimes he may have committed while President. [20] [21] In a televised broadcast to the nation, Ford explained that he felt the pardon was in the best interests of the country and that the Nixon family's situation "is an American tragedy in which we all have played a part. It could go on and on and on, or someone must write the end to it. I have concluded that only I can do that, and if I can, I must." [22] At the same time as he announced the Nixon pardon, Ford introduced a conditional amnesty program for Vietnam War draft dodgers who had fled to countries such as Canada . [23] Unconditional amnesty, however, did not come about until the Jimmy Carter presidency. [24] The Nixon pardon was highly controversial. Critics derided the move and claimed a " corrupt bargain " had been struck between the men. [3] They claimed Ford's pardon was quid pro quo in exchange for Nixon's resignation that elevated Ford to the Presidency. Nixon's chief of staff, Alexander Haig, offered a deal to Ford. Bob Woodward, in his book, Shadow, recounts the Haig deal. Woodward recounts that Haig entered Ford's office on August 1 , 1974 while Ford was still Vice President and Nixon had yet to resign. Haig told Ford that there were three pardon options: (1) Nixon could pardon himself and resign, (2) Nixon could pardon his aides involved in Watergate and then resign, or (3) Nixon could agree to leave in return for an agreement that the new president would pardon him. After listing these options, Haig handed Ford various papers; one of these papers included a discussion of the president's legal authority to pardon and another sheet was a draft pardon form that only needed Ford's signature and Nixon's name to make it legal. Woodward summarizes the setting between Haig and Ford as follows: "Even if Haig offered no direct words on his views, the message was almost certainly sent. An emotional man, Haig was incapable of concealing his feelings; those who worked closely with him rarely found him ambiguous." Despite the situation, Ford never accepted the offer from Haig and later decided to pardon Nixon on his own terms. Regardless, historians believe the controversy was one of the major reasons Ford lost the election in 1976 . [25] Wikisource has original text related to this article: Ford's first press secretary and close friend Jerald terHorst resigned his post in protest after the announcement of President Nixon's full pardon. [ edit ] Administration and Cabinet Gerald Ford meets with his Cabinet in 1975. Upon assuming office, Ford inherited the Cabinet Nixon selected during his tenure in office. Over the course of Ford's relatively brief administration, only Secretary of State Henry Kissinger and Secretary of the Treasury William Simon remained. Ford appointed William Coleman as Secretary of Transportation , the second African American to serve in a presidential Cabinet (after Robert Clifton Weaver ) and the first appointed in a Republican administration. [26] Ford selected George H.W. Bush to be both Ambassador to the People's Republic of China in 1974 and Director of the Central Intelligence Agency in 1975. [27] In 1975, Ford also selected former congressman and ambassador Donald Rumsfeld as Secretary of Defense . Rumsfeld had previously served as Ford's transition chairman and later Chief of Staff . Additionally, Ford chose a young Wyoming politician, Richard Cheney , to be his new Chief of Staff and later campaign manager for Ford's 1976 presidential campaign . [28] Ford's dramatic reorganization of his Cabinet in the fall of 1975 has been referred to by political commentators as The " Halloween Massacre ." The Ford Cabinet Main articles: United States House election, 1974 and United States Senate election, 1974 The 1974 Congressional midterm elections took place less than three months after Ford assumed office. Occurring in the wake of the Watergate scandal, the Democratic Party was able to turn voter dissatisfaction into large gains in the House election , taking 49 seats from the Republican Party and increasing their majority to 291 of the 435 seats. Even Ford's old, reliably Republican seat was taken by Democrat Richard VanderVeen . In the Senate election, the Democratic majority became 60 in the 100-seat body. [29] In both houses, the numbers were above or close to the two-thirds mark required to override a presidential veto , and the 94th Congress overrode the highest percentage of vetoes since Franklin Pierce was President in the 1850s. [30] [ edit ] Domestic policy The economy was a great concern during the Ford administration. In response to rising inflation , Ford went before the American public in October 1974 and asked them to " whip inflation now ." As part of this program, he urged people to wear "WIN" buttons. [31] In hindsight, this was viewed as simply a public relations gimmick without offering any effective means of solving the underlying problems. [32] At the time, inflation was around 7%. [33] The Drop Dead cover in 1975 The economic focus began to change as the country sank into a mild recession , and in March 1975, Ford and Congress signed into law income tax rebates as part of the Tax Reduction Act of 1975 to boost the economy. When New York City faced bankruptcy in 1975, Mayor Abraham Beame was unsuccessful in obtaining Ford's support for a federal bailout. The incident prompted the New York Daily News ' notorious headline: "Ford to City: Drop Dead." [34] Similar to the more recent bird flu concerns, Ford was confronted with a potential swine flu pandemic . Sometime in the early 1970s, an influenza strain H1N1 shifted from a form of flu that affected pigs and crossed over to humans. On February 5 , 1976 , an Army recruit at Fort Dix mysteriously died and four fellow soldiers were hospitalized; health officials announced that swine flu was the cause. Soon after, public health officials in the Ford administration urged that every person in the United States be vaccinated . [35] Although the vaccination program was plagued by delays and public relations problems, some 24% of the population was vaccinated by the time the program was cancelled. The vaccine was blamed for twenty-five deaths; more people died from the shots than from the swine flu. [36] [ edit ] Foreign policy South Vietnamese civilians scramble to board a U.S. helicopter during the American evacuation of Saigon . The Ford Administration saw the final withdrawal of American personnel from Vietnam in ' Operation Frequent Wind ', and the subsequent fall of Saigon . On April 29 and the morning of April 30 , 1975 , the American embassy in Saigon was evacuated amidst a chaotic scene. Some 1,373 U.S. citizens and 5,595 Vietnamese and third country nationals were evacuated by military and Air America helicopters to U.S. Navy ships off-shore. Ford meets with Soviet Union leader Leonid Brezhnev in Vladivostok on November 1974 to sign a joint communiqué on the SALT treaty. From the prior administration, in addition to longstanding Cold War issues, Ford inherited the on-going détente with both the Soviet Union and the People's Republic of China —and the policy of building relationships with the two communist countries, which had been mutually antagonistic toward each other for many years. Still in place from the Nixon Administration was the Strategic Arms Limitation Treaty . [37] The thawing relationship brought about by Nixon's visit to China was reinforced by Ford's December 1975 visit to the communist country. [38] In 1975, the Administration entered into the Helsinki Accords with the Soviet Union, creating the framework of the Helsinki Watch , an independent non-governmental organization created to monitor compliance that later evolved into Human Rights Watch . [39] Ford also faced a foreign policy crisis with the Mayaguez Incident . In May 1975, shortly after the Khmer Rouge took power in Cambodia , Cambodians seized the American merchant ship Mayaguez in international waters. Ford dispatched Marines to rescue the crew, but the Marines landed on the wrong island and met unexpectedly stiff resistance just as, unknown to the U.S., the Mayaguez sailors were being released. In the operation, fifty U.S. servicemen were wounded and forty-one killed while approximately sixty Khmer Rouge soldiers were killed. [40] Secret Service rushing Ford to safety after an assassination attempt by Lynette "Squeaky" Fromme Ford faced two assassination attempts during the course of his presidency, both over a three-week period. While in Sacramento, California on September 5 , 1975 , Lynette "Squeaky" Fromme , a follower of Charles Manson , pointed a Colt .45-caliber handgun at Ford and pulled the trigger. Though the gun was loaded with five bullets, it was an automatic pistol and the slide had not been pulled to place a bullet in the firing chamber, making it impossible for the gun to fire. Fromme was taken into custody; she was later convicted of attempted assassination of the President and was sentenced to life in prison. [41] Seventeen days later, another woman, Sara Jane Moore , also tried to kill Ford while he was visiting San Francisco , but her attempt was thwarted when bystander Oliver Sipple deflected her shot. One person was injured when Moore fired, and she was later sentenced to life in prison. [42] [2] [ edit ] Supreme Court appointment In 1975, Ford appointed John Paul Stevens as Associate Justice of the Supreme Court of the United States to replace retiring Justice William O. Douglas . Stevens had been a judge of the United States Court of Appeals for the Seventh Circuit , appointed by President Nixon. [43] During his tenure as House Republican leader, Ford had led efforts to have Douglas impeached. After being confirmed, Stevens eventually disappointed some conservatives by siding with the Court's liberal wing regarding the outcome of many key issues. [44] Nevertheless, President Gerald Ford recently paid tribute to John Paul Stevens. "He has served his nation well," Ford said of Stevens, "with dignity, intellect and without partisan political concerns." [3] [ edit ] 1976 presidential election Main article: United States presidential election, 1976 Ford and his wife Betty after 1976 Republican nomination Ford reluctantly agreed to run for office in 1976 but first had to counter a challenge for the Republican party nomination. Former Governor of California Ronald Reagan and the party's conservative wing faulted Ford for failing to do more in South Vietnam , for signing the Helsinki Accords and for negotiating to cede the Panama Canal . Reagan launched his campaign in the autumn of 1975 and won several primaries before withdrawing from the race at the Republican Convention in Kansas City, Missouri . The conservative insurgency convinced Ford to drop the more liberal Vice President Nelson Rockefeller in favor of Kansas Senator Bob Dole . [45] Ford and Jimmy Carter debate In addition to the pardon dispute and lingering anti-Republican sentiment, Ford had to counter a plethora of negative media imagery. Chevy Chase often did pratfalls on Saturday Night Live , imitating Ford, who had been seen stumbling on two occasions during his term. As Chase commented, "He even mentioned in his own autobiography it had an effect over a period of time that affected the election to some degree." [46] Ford's campaign had an advantage from several activities held during 1976 celebrating the United States Bicentennial . The Washington, D.C. fireworks display was presided over by the President and televised nationally. [47] Democratic nominee and former Georgia governor Jimmy Carter campaigned as an outsider and reformer; he gained support from voters dismayed by the Watergate scandal. Carter led consistently in the polls, and Ford was never able to shake voter dissatisfaction following Watergate and the Nixon pardon. For myself and for our Nation, I want to thank my predecessor for all he has done to heal our land. —Jimmy Carter, January 20 , 1977 [48] Presidential debates were reintroduced for the first time since the 1960 election . While Ford was seen as the winner of the first debate , during the second debate he inexplicably blundered when he stated, "There is no Soviet domination of Eastern Europe and there never will be under a Ford Administration." Ford also said that he did not "believe that the Poles consider themselves dominated by the Soviet Union." [49] In the end, Carter won the election, receiving 50.1% of the popular vote and 297 electoral votes compared with 48.0% and 240 electoral votes for Ford. Though he lost, in the three months between the Republican National Convention and the election, Ford managed to close what was once a 34-point Carter lead to a 2-point margin. Had Ford won the election, he would have been disqualified by the 22nd Amendment from running in 1980 , since he served more than 2 years of Nixon's term. Gerald R. Ford Official White House Portrait by Everett Kinstler The pardon controversy eventually subsided. Ford's successor, Jimmy Carter, opened his 1977 inaugural address by praising the outgoing President. [48] President George W. Bush with former President Gerald Ford and Betty Ford April 23 , 2006 Ford remained relatively active in the years after his presidency and continued to make appearances at events of historical and ceremonial significance to the nation, such as Presidential inaugurals and memorial services. After securing the Republican nomination in 1980, Ronald Reagan gave serious consideration to his former rival Ford as a potential vice-presidential running mate. But negotiations between the Reagan and Ford camps at the Republican National Convention in Detroit were unsuccessful. Ford conditioned his acceptance on Reagan's agreement to an unprecedented "co-presidency," giving Ford the power to control key executive branch appointments (such as Henry Kissinger as Secretary of State and Alan Greenspan as Treasury Secretary). After rejecting these terms, Reagan offered the vice-presidential nomination instead to George H.W. Bush. [50] Ford is a close friend of his successor, Jimmy Carter, despite the fact that Carter defeated him in the 1976 presidential election . Their friendship began in 1981, after both had left office, when they attended the funeral of Egypt 's slain leader Anwar Al Sadat . Today, Carter and his wife, Rosalynn , visit President and Mrs. Ford's home frequently. [51] In 1981, he opened the Gerald R. Ford Museum in Grand Rapids, Michigan, and the Gerald R. Ford Library in Ann Arbor, Michigan . [52] In 1999, Ford was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom by Bill Clinton . [53] In 2001, he was presented with the John F. Kennedy Profiles in Courage Award for his decision to pardon Richard Nixon to stop the agony America was experiencing over Watergate. [54] In retirement Ford also devoted much time to his love of golf , often playing both privately and in public events with comedian Bob Hope , a longtime friend. [ edit ] Health problems As Ford approached his ninetieth year, he began to experience significant health problems. He suffered two minor strokes at the 2000 Republican National Convention , but made a quick recovery. [55] In January 2006, he spent 11 days at the Eisenhower Medical Center near his residence at Rancho Mirage, California , for treatment of pneumonia . [56] President George W. Bush visited former President Ford in April 2006 at Ford's home in Rancho Mirage; the former President, walking with a cane, escorted Bush back outside to his car after visiting for about an hour. While vacationing in Vail, Colorado , he was hospitalized for two days in July 2006 for shortness of breath. [57] On August 15 , 2006 Ford was admitted to St. Mary's Hospital of the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota for "testing and evaluation". On August 21 , it was reported that he had been fitted with a pacemaker . On August 25 , he underwent an angioplasty procedure at the Mayo Clinic, according to a statement from an assistant to Ford. On August 28 , Ford was released from the hospital and returned with his wife Betty to their California home. On October 12 however, Ford entered the hospital yet again for undisclosed tests at the Eisenhower Medical Center in Rancho Mirage, California, [58] he was released on October 16 . As a result of his frail health in the past year it was announced on October 17 that Ford is considering selling his home near Vail, Colorado due to the uncertainty as to whether he would be able to return. On November 22 , 2004 , New York Republican Governor George Pataki named Ford and the other living former Presidents ( Jimmy Carter , George H. W. Bush and Bill Clinton ) as honorary members of the board rebuilding the WTC . Funeral plans for former presidents are written out by the Presidents themselves and kept until their death by the Military District of Washington , which oversees state funerals , and then the funeral is performed to their wishes. Ford, the oldest of the living ex-presidents, has requested a state funeral and a burial at his presidential museum in Grand Rapids, Michigan . [ edit ] Trivia Ford, Franklin D. Roosevelt , and Bill Clinton are the only three former Presidents who did not have full siblings. (No president has been a true only child .) Gerald Ford was the 38th President to be born as well as the 38th to serve. Richard Nixon was 37th born, 37th to serve, and the 37th to die. John F. Kennedy was the 39th President born, 35th to serve and the 32nd to die. Five of the 43 presidents ( Carter , Ford, George H.W. Bush , Clinton , and George W. Bush ) are still living. After leaving office, Ford did a television public service announcement for the Boy Scouts of America . The advertisement featured a long list of former Boy Scout celebrities , athletes , etc. each stating that when your son joins Scouting there was no guarantee that he would grow up to be a movie star, major league player, astronaut , etc. At the closing, Ford's appearance intentionally surpasses all the others as he says, "When your son joins the Boy Scouts there's no guarantee that he'll grow up to be President... but you never know." In the 1990s, the West Michigan Shores Council renamed itself in honor of the President. Ford was characterized in The Simpsons episode " Two Bad Neighbors ," having moved in across the street from the family after George H.W. Bush left in disgust. He gets along famously with Homer , inviting him over to watch football , while the two snack on beer and nachos . The two trip simultaneously on the way to Ford's new home, with both muttering " D'oh !" at the same moment, showing both to be accident prone.

i don't know

What comedy duo made their feature film debut in 1978's Up in Smoke?

EXCLUSIVE: Tommy Chong Discusses 'Up In Smoke 2' and More - iamROGUE.com EXCLUSIVE: Tommy Chong Discusses 'Up In Smoke 2' and More Tuesday, 19 April 2011 14:43 Written by  Jami Philbrick Rate this item 5 (7 votes) Today may be April 20th but to millions of potheads around the world it is referred to as 4/20, a national holiday for stoners. In honor of that, I wanted to bring you some news about the long rumored Up In Smoke 2, a sequel to comedy legends Cheech & Chong’s classic stoner-comedy Up in Smoke, which by all accounts is one of the most popular pot-movies of all time. Tommy Chong and Cheech Marin, otherwise known as the pot-smoking comedy duo Cheech & Chong, began their career as stand-up comics in the early ‘70s. They eventually gained attention for a string of popular comedy albums, which featured hit songs like “Basketball Jones.” But it was their feature film debut in ‘1978s Up In Smoke that made them icons to the stoner community all around the world. The comedic team broke up in the mid ‘80s and with rumors of bad blood between them; fans thought that they would never see a sequel to one of the most successful marijuana comedies of all time. The prospects of a second film got even slimmer in 2003 when Tommy was unjustly arrested and incarcerated for “conspiring to distribute drug paraphernalia.” But upon his release in 2004, rumors began to swirl about the two comedians reuniting again and possibly making another movie. In 2008, the team publicly announced that they would be reuniting for an upcoming tour, and it was soon after that when rumors of the comedians planning an Up In Smoke sequel began circulating. Over the weekend I had an opportunity to catch up with Tommy Chong, one half of the legendary comedy team, while he was attending the premiere of his new animated film Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil, which opens in theaters everywhere on April 29th. In fact, both Chong and Cheech Marin lend their voices to the film and portray two of The Three Little Pigs. While I was unable to speak with Cheech, Tommy gave me the scoop on the status of Up In Smoke 2, as well as their upcoming untitled animated project, and his possible run for President! I began by asking Tommy Chong what exactly the current status is on his script for Up In Smoke 2. ‘It’s almost done,” replied the legendary comedian. “What happens is I write the first part and then I bring Cheech in and then we polish it up. I’m almost at the part where I can struggle with what I want him to do,” joked Chong. “I haven’t quite gotten there yet, but its real close.” Since Chong is writing the script, I followed up by asking him if Cheech is going to direct the movie. “Uh, no. I am going to direct it,” answered Chong. I continued by asking the comedian if Up In Smoke 2 is going to revolve around the same characters as the first film, only thirty years later. “In a very funny way,” confirmed Chong. “Everything’s surprising. I don’t want to give anything away. All I can say is it’s going to be Up in Smoke…thirty years later.” I also asked Chong about the current status of the long rumored animated film that the comedians are supposedly working on. “The animated movie is done; we are just waiting on the right deal to release it. You know it’s an adult sort of thing,” explained Chong. “It’s all the albums that we did and then we took them and made them into a cartoon. It’s pretty cool. It’s done; it’s all in the can. We are just waiting for the right time to release it,” he continued. “They’re testing it to see if it could be released in theaters, that’s what we’d like. The dynamics of the business have changed so much. Now what we used to do years ago, you can’t do anymore, Chong explained. “So it’s all changed. I might just freak out like Donald Trump and run for president.” I followed that comment up by asking Chong the obvious question: is he really planning to run for President in 2012? “Well, no … I’ll run for Drug Czar and then just promote our movies,” he joked. Finally, I asked Chong if he was disappointed that Prop 19, which would have legalized Marijuana use in California, was voted down last November. “I was very disappointed but it’s too soon,” he said. “You know if you legalize it, you put too many people out of work. Cops, jails, you know all those people. You have to plan for it,” Chong explained. “It’s ridiculous. Thirty years later, and it’s still not legal? It’s just ridiculous.” Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil opens in theaters on April 29th.

Cheech & Chong

What two dogs are cross bred to produce the Schnoodle?

Up in Smoke (1978) - News NEWS 19 December 2012 6:01 AM, PST | SneakPeek | See recent SneakPeek news » From Entertainment Earth, Sneak Peek the limited edition " Cheech & Chong " 17 and 18-inch 'dude-talking' plush dolls, wardrobed as the characters 'Pedro' and 'Man', from the classic comedy feature " Up In Smoke ". "...bring ' Cheech  Marin ' home, with this 17-inch Talking Plush Doll. Phrases include, 'Is that a joint, man?', 'Is it heavy stuff, man?' and 'Am I driving Ok, man?'..." "...bring ' Tommy Chong ' home,with this 18-inch Talking Plush Doll. Phrases include 'Do you wanna get high, man?', 'Toke, Toke it up, man!', and 'My dog ate my stash, man.'..." Click the images to enlarge and Sneak Peek " Up in Smoke "... » 12 December 2012 10:57 AM, PST | DreadCentral.com | See recent Dread Central news » Fans of the unique band Hollywood Undead are in for a treat. They have just released the official video for "We Are," the first song from their upcoming album Notes From the Underground. Come in and see it here! We also have album pre-order info and upcoming tour dates! Check out the killer video for "We Are" below; you can pre-order the full album, Notes from the Underground, right here or from the EvilShop below. The release date is January 8, 2013. Stay tuned to Dread Central for a special interview with Hollywood Undead member Charlie Scene to promote the upcoming album soon, and for more in the meantime visit the official Hollywood Undead website, "like" Hollywood Undead on Facebook and follow Hollywood Undead on Twitter (@hollywoodundead). From the Press Release Hollywood Undead have just released the official music video for the first single, "We Are," off their upcoming album Notes from » - Doctor Gash Directed by Terrence O’Hara Airs Tuesdays at 8pm (Et) on CBS For a show that largely prides itself on its character-driven storylines, NCIS has recently produced fewer episodes whose strength results from the focused analysis of a central character, missing the mark of perfection by omitting natural human interaction, floundering with uncharacteristic writing, and needlessly revisiting disposable characters. Fortunately, with “Phoenix”, the show returns to its roots and delivers a highly-entertaining episode brimming with favorable antics and enjoyable guest appearances. Leading the investigation-of-the-week is Doctor Mallard, who starts off the hour ominously ordering the exhumation of a corpse from a 12-year-old cold case. Unlike in “Recovery”, where his inability to occupy himself while on medical leave made for his unwelcome presence both in autopsy and on screen in general, David McCallum ’s insightful doctor is genuinely enjoyable here, fumbling » - Amanda Williams 17 August 2012 11:30 AM, PDT | TheInsider.com | See recent The Insider news » This hunky Olympic gold-medal swimmer made a splash at the recent London 2012 Olympics both inside and outside of the pool. Here are five things you may not know about Ryan Lochte , who has already expressed his desire to move to Hollywood to pursue various showbiz opportunities. 1. Already designed a limited edition footwear collection for Speedo and now wants to develop an entire clothing line. Related: Ryan Lochte 's Mom Talks One-Night Stands 2. Earned a degree in Sports Management from the University of Florida. 3. Is a big fan of rap music and his favorite musician is Lil Wayne. Related: Ryan Lochte on 'What Women Look Hottest In' 4. Favorite movie is Cheech and Chong 's 1978 comedy Up in Smoke . 5. Has three dogs -- Tike and Zeus (both Rottweilers) and Spidy (Chow mix). 2 August 2012 11:09 AM, PDT | Deadline | See recent Deadline news » ICM Partners has signed Philip Atwell, and will focus on finding him feature work. Atwell most recently directed the ground breaking Tupac Shakur Hologram project at Coachella. The show became an internet sensation, and sparked a 500% increase in sales of the late rapper’s albums, and also drove up visual effects company Digital Domain ’s stock price. It won Atwell the Cannes Lion Titanium Award. Atwell has directed War, with Jason Statham and Jet Li and the concert film Up In Smoke with Eminem, Snoop, Ice Cube and Dr. Dre . Here’s the hologram: » - MIKE FLEMING 8 July 2012 7:59 PM, PDT | TVLine.com | See recent TVLine.com news » In Sunday’s “Let’s Boot and Rally” episode of True Blood, Sookie reunited with Eric. And Bill. But not that way. Rather, she teamed up with her exes as well as Alcide – her current, um… “beau,” shall we call him? – to track down Russell. The clock was ticking, too, as Salome ordered the vamps iStaked at dawn if their mission was unsuccessful. Of course, that was just one of the 204 stories unfolding. Among the highlights of the others: Tara And Jessica Became BFFs | Well, briefly. After Pam dressed her progeny in the finest gladrags this side of RuPaul’s » - Andy Patrick 10 June 2012 7:51 AM, PDT | Moviefone | See recent Moviefone news » Actor and comedian Tommy Chong has been diagnosed with prostate cancer. In an interview with CNN, the 74-year-old comic revealed to anchor Don Lemon that he had been diagnosed about a month ago and that the cancer is currently in a "slow stage one." As for treatment, Chong is doing it the only way he knows how: "with hemp oil [and] with cannabis... So [legalizing marijuana] means a lot more to me than just being able to smoke a joint without being arrested." (Chong reiterated to Lemon that he quit smoking marijuana a year ago and now ingests hemp oil instead.) Tommy Chong is best known for his work in the comedy duo Cheech & Chong (with fellow actor/comedian Cheech Marin ), having appeared in such pot-friendly movies as " Up in Smoke " and " Cheech & Chong 's Next Movie." Tommy has also had a prolific television career as well, guest-starring on "That 70s Show," "Dharma & Greg" and "Miami Vice. » - Alex Suskind 14 May 2012 7:51 AM, PDT | TVfanatic | See recent TVfanatic news » Our NCIS review broke down the latest installment of television's #1 show in great detail. Now, TV Fanatic staff members Steve Marsi, Matt Richenthal and Eric Hochberger have assembled for our weekly Round Table Q&A discussion of events from Tuesday's episode, " Up In Smoke ." Join in below, as we analyze the many twists and turns of the hunt for Dearing, the controversial return of Jamie Lee Curtis , Palmer's ill-fated bachelor party and much more ... ---------------------------------- Describe this episode in one word (or two, or three, or four). Steve: An interesting chapter. Eric: Predictably intense. What was your favorite quote or one-liner from the episode? Steve: The episode was light on one liners, even from Dinozzo. That's when you know it's serious. NCIS has been about the agents' respective personae, and how they balance work and their personal lives. Even if it's thin on humor, the show always finds that balance. » - steve@iscribelimited.com (Steve Marsi) 9 May 2012 1:07 PM, PDT | TVfanatic | See recent TVfanatic news » No one is safe ... especially, from the looks of the promo below, in the final two minutes of next week's NCIS . Will "Til Death Do Us Part" closes out the ninth season in tragic fashion? On May 15, terrorism threatens to shake the foundations of the U.S. Navy and NCIS , when the team continues to be eluded by the newest member of the agency's Most Wanted Wall. Meanwhile, Jimmy Palmer’s destination wedding is impacted by the case, which left off in surprising fashion last night (read our review of " Up in Smoke ") with Vance's apparent kidnapping. Moreover, the connections of Jamie Lee Curtis ' character, and Scott Wolf 's, to Dearing and the case remain a mystery, leaving Gibbs & Co. scrambling for answers and desperate to uncover the next target. One which may be closer than they ever imagined ... NCIS Season 9 Finale Promo For more hints on what's to come Tuesday, » - steve@iscribelimited.com (Steve Marsi) 8 May 2012 8:04 PM, PDT | TVfanatic | See recent TVfanatic news » NCIS ' season-ending story arc continued Tuesday in an unpredictably complex installment that sent the team in a half dozen different directions with an elusive terrorist mastermind always one step ahead. If not more. Few shows would leave their main character so flummoxed at such a crucial juncture, or send the team down the wrong path for the better part of an episode as " Up in Smoke " did this evening. That's part of what makes this arc (and NCIS in general) so good, though. Every chapter fits into a broader narrative, keeping you guessing as to what's next while remaining entertaining on its own merit. A depraved financial mogul convinced he's a hero. His embezzling second-in-command. A night watchman serving as the go-between. A rogue dentist. A middleman gunned down in a parking lot. All of these would-be adversaries played a role this week, but none hold a candle to Jamie Lee Curtis ' Dr. » - steve@iscribelimited.com (Steve Marsi) 8 May 2012 6:53 AM, PDT | TVovermind.com | See recent TVovermind.com news » NCIS Preview: The Explosive Arc To the Season 9 Finale Continues Tonight NCIS continues its explosive climb to the May 15 finale of Season 9.  The four-episode arc started by showing that, even after nine years, there is much left to explore about the NCIS team.  The first installment in the arc, "Rekindled", explained how eternal frat boy, Tony Dinozzo, ( Michael Weatherly ) became a cop. The "Rekindled" episode featuring Dinozzo saving a child from a fire was as emotionally combustable as the fiery bomb material, thermite, that is the thread connecting the arc.  Weatherly's poignant portrayal of a man whose life found meaning in the screams of a child is a far cry from the class-clown-exterior schtick he uses to razz his team.  Dinozzo opened a painful vein for McGee ( Sean Murray ) and Ziva ( Cote de Pablo ) that is not revealed often to his NCIS teammates. "Playing With Fire", the arc's second installment, » - Melissa J L Smith Sciuto 8 May 2012 6:43 AM, PDT | TVfanatic | See recent TVfanatic news » Someone thinks Dorneget is more interesting than we do. NCIS picks up tonight where last week's "Playing With Fire" left off (see review and Round Table for a full discussion of that episode). Hot on the trail of the Navy arsonist, the team makes an alarming discovery. When Abby analyzes the high-tech bug found inside the probationary agent’s tooth, NCIS is left searching for answers regarding how it got there. Gibbs, as always, is one step ahead of the rest. Watch the sneak preview clip from " Up in Smoke " below ... NCIS ' Up in Smoke ' Clip - The Bug » - steve@iscribelimited.com (Steve Marsi) 4 May 2012 1:00 PM, PDT | TVfanatic | See recent TVfanatic news » The NCIS season finale promises to be one of the most explosive installments in the show's nine years, with Gibbs and his team members continuing to track the terrorist(s) targeting the U.S. Navy. The season’s final big arc, which began with "Rekindled" and "Playing With Fire," continues next Tuesday with " Up in Smoke " before concluding May 15 with the Season 9 finale, "Til Death Do Us Part." What familiar face(s) can we expect to see? Who's using a stunt double? And what secret was so big the crew wasn't allowed to read it? We obviously don't know, but we welcome your theories below. Excerpts from executive producer Gary Glasberg 's recent chat with EW: On the return of Scott Wolf 's Agent Stratton: "He’s ultimately going to be needed because of information that he has. The beauty of Scott Wolf is that he’s personable and in » - steve@iscribelimited.com (Steve Marsi) 4 May 2012 9:02 AM, PDT | TVfanatic | See recent TVfanatic news » This week's NCIS episode, "Playing With Fire," found the team staying hot on an arsonist's trail and desperate to stop the enemy's next move. That enemy now has a name and face: Harper Dearing. The apparent terrorist hell bent on bringing down Navy ships is played by The West Wing 's Richard Schiff , who appears for the first time next week and may have it out for not only the Navy, but Gibbs personally. In the next installment of this outstanding season-ending arc, the stakes are raised again for the team as a bug is found inside Ned Dorneget's tooth (see NCIS promo and photos from earlier in the week). Check out the extended version of the trailer for " Up in Smoke " ... Also, as a bonus, check out the video below of the NCIS cast on Extra earlier this week. There are no big spoilers or anything, » - steve@iscribelimited.com (Steve Marsi) NCIS ' outstanding season-ending arc continues next week with " Up in Smoke ." Last night's installment, "Playing With Fire," picked up where the previous week's "Rekindled" left off. Both hours were terrific, with the team hot on an arsonist's trail and desperate to stop a terrorist's next move. That terrorist now has a name and face: Harper Deering, played by The West Wing 's Richard Schiff . He makes his debut next week, while Jamie Lee Curtis reprises her role as Dr. Samantha Ryan . The stakes are raised again as team tracks down Deering and tries to ascertain what secrets could be in enemy hands after a high-tech bug is found inside a probationary agent Ned Dorneget's tooth. 26 April 2012 8:21 AM, PDT | TVfanatic | See recent TVfanatic news » We knew Dorneget had a big mouth, but didn't expect anything like this. NCIS returns with a new episode next week, "Playing With Fire." Follow this links for a promo and photos from that installment, which kicks off the final three episodes of the show's ninth season. On May 8, Season 9's penultimate episode will be titled " Up in Smoke ." The team's search for the terrorist(s) targeting the U.S. Navy takes another bizarre turn when a high-tech bug is found in probationary agent Ned Dorneget's tooth, according to CBS' official synopsis. An eyeball last season and now a tooth? What they won't think of next ... Meanwhile, the festivities for Jimmy Palmer’s wedding continue with the bachelor party. Jamie Lee Curtis Returns as Dr. Samantha Ryan , and Richard Schiff ( The West Wing ) begins his guest arc as Harper Dearing. One week later, the May 15 season finale carries a double entendre of a title, » - steve@iscribelimited.com (Steve Marsi) 25 April 2012 9:13 AM, PDT | TVfanatic | See recent TVfanatic news » On next week's NCIS, we pick up where "Rekindled" left off (see our review and Round Table) as an investigation of a fire on a Navy vessel reveals evidence that elevates security at all U.S. Navy facilities worldwide. Meanwhile, Dinozzo and Ziva travel to Italy when an explosive device is found hidden on a Navy ship. " Up in Smoke " is the third to last episode of Season 9, with " Up in Smoke " and "Til Death Do Us Part" to follow. Take a look at the first promo for the episode below: NCIS 'Playing With Fire' Promo How do you see this episode, and the rest of the season playing out? Where will the team stand heading into Season 10? Share your predictions in the comments. Here's a photo gallery from "Playing With Fire" as well: » 20 April 2012 8:00 AM, PDT | NextMovie | See recent NextMovie news » The numbers 4-20 have tons of significance in both world history and American culture. It's Hitler's birthday and the date of the Columbine massacre, for starters. But since those two are such buzzkills, we'll focus on what else the date means: high time for stoners everywhere. Looking back at our favorite stoner films, we notice many actors portray potheads one-dimensionally: eyes glazed, dopey voice, etc. We love the following movie stoners because they're not only funny, but also multidimensional. Okay, but mostly because they're funny. 9. Brad Pitt , ' True Romance ' (1993) Floyd is the ultimate slacker stoner. Pitt plays the character as being so high he barely forms words outside of mumbling, "Hey! Get some beer and some cleaning products." His scenes provide great comedic relief in an otherwise rough and violent movie. We relate because we've had nightmarishly lazy roommates like Floyd. The scenes are twice as funny now in hindsight, » - Ryan McKee

i don't know

Known as The Sunflower State, what was the 34th state to join the Union on January 29, 1861?

Major Rivers: Kansas River, Republican River, Smoky Hill River, Arkansas River, Missouri River Major Lakes: Tuttle Creek Reservoir, Cheney Reservoir, Waconda Lake Highest Point: Mount Sunflower 4,041 feet above sea level State Motto: Ad astra per aspera (Latin for To the stars through difficulties) State Bird: Western Meadowlark State Amphibian: Barred tiger salamander State Insect: Honeybee

Kansas

Sept 5, 1774 saw the first sitting of what important body, which met in Philadelphia's Carpenter's Hall?

Happy birthday, Kansas! | CJOnline.com Happy birthday, Kansas! Today, on 141st anniversary of statehood, Sunflower State celebrates its rich heritage Posted: Tuesday, January 29, 2002 By By Matt Moline Photos And who would want to? Especially on Kansas Statehood Day, the day the Sunflower State entered the union as the 34th state on Jan. 29, 1861. In 1861, Kansans took to the streets to cheer the statehood announcement, accompanied by the sounds of cannon salutes and church bells. One hundred and forty-one years later, today's public celebration is apt to be less noisy, although Kansas author Roy Bird will follow Lincoln's example: The Herington native will deliver a speech on state history this evening in Leavenworth. "As far as celebrations are concerned, Kansans have always been in that kind of a mode when it comes to our history," Bird said Monday. "It changes with the times, but the important thing to remember is that our history is still being celebrated." Bird , who is the author of hundreds of articles and several books about the state, will speak to a group of children and their parents at 7 p.m. at Leavenworth Public Library. Bird's topic will focus on a group of little-known heroes in Kansas history, most notably Chaplain Emil Kapaun, the Catholic priest who died in a North Korean prison camp in 1951 rather than abandon several members of the 8th Cavalry left stranded on a cold, bloody battlefield in Korea. "He could have escaped with the rest of the unit," Bird said, "but when he realized there was a pocket of the regiment still surrounded, he went through enemy lines to minister to these men, both spiritually and in other ways." In the POW camp, Kapaun quickly became known as "Father Dismas," in honor of the thief who occupied a cross at the right side of Jesus Christ, according to the biblical account of the crucifixion. "He got the name because of his skill at stealing food for starving prisoners," Bird said. "He washed the clothes of the sick men and bathed or fed those unable to care for themselves." Kapaun, who grew up in Marion County's Pilsen community, died six months after his capture by Red Chinese troops. After Kapaun's death, the 35-year-old priest was recommended for both canonization in the Roman Catholic Church and the Medal of Honor, "but so far has received neither," Bird said. Kansas history milestones Kansas entered the union as the 34th state 141 years ago, on Jan. 29, 1861. • April 13, 1542 -- Franciscan missionary Father Juan de Padilla returned to the future state of Kansas (460th anniversary). Within a year, the friar would become the first Christian martyr in North America. • 1717 -- First recorded use of a variation of the name "Kansas," on a French map (285th anniversary). • Aug. 31, 1807 -- First hunting licenses issued in Kansas, to a pair of French fur trappers (195th anniversary). • May 25, 1822 -- First Santa Fe Trail wagon train left Fort Osage, Mo., bound for Santa Fe, N.M. Near present-day Great Bend, 10 of the party's 28 horses were lost in a buffalo stampede (180th anniversary). • May 8, 1827 -- Founding of Fort Leavenworth, oldest continuously operated U.S. Army post west of the Mississippi River (175th anniversary). • Oct. 2-4, 1832 -- Tour of the future state of Kansas by Washington Irving, the author of "The Legend of Sleepy Hollow," and the creator of the fictional Rip Van Winkle character (170th anniversary). • Spring 1852 -- Opening of Frank Marshall's lucrative ferry and trading post business in Marshall County, at the Big Blue River crossing of the Oregon Trail (150th anniversary). • Sept. 5, 1867 -- First railroad shipment from Abilene of longhorn cattle driven up from Texas on the Chisholm Trail (135th anniversary). • January 1872 -- Buffalo-hunting visit to Kansas of Grand Duke Alexis, third surviving son of Russia's Czar Alexander (130th anniversary). • Feb. 23, 1887 -- Arrest of Valley Falls resident Moses Harmon and his son, George, publishers of a "free love" periodical widely distributed to readers around the state (115th anniversary). • March 27, 1897 -- First UFO scare in state history panicked thousands of Kansans, many of whom reported sighting a blood-red "mystery airship" over the Statehouse (105th anniversary). • April 19, 1897 -- First alien abduction reported in Kansas history, Woodson County (105th anniversary). • Jan. 30, 1907 -- Completion of the first hard-surfaced stretch of highway in Kansas, near Chanute (95th anniversary). • Dec. 12, 1912 -- First all-woman jury convened in a Kansas courtroom, El Dorado (90th anniversary). • Sept. 22, 1912 -- 50th anniversary celebrations in Kansas of Abraham Lincoln's Emancipation Proclamation (100th anniversary). • 1917 -- Birth of Pulitzer Prize-winning poet Gwendolyn Brooks, in Topeka (85th anniversary). • July 14, 1917 -- One of the largest public birthday parties in state history, honoring Gov. Arthur Capper, born on July 14, 1865. An estimated 15,000 children ate free ice cream at the event and received complimentary streetcar rides to Topeka's Garfield Park (85th anniversary). • July 2, 1937 -- Disappearance of Kansas-born aviator Amelia Earhart, while attempting to complete the last leg over the western Pacific of a history-making around-the-world flight (65th anniversary). • Sept. 21, 1947 -- Future presidential candidate Bob Dole underwent physical therapy at Topeka's VA hospital for treatment of battle wounds sustained while serving with the U.S. Army in Italy (60th anniversary). • June 1982 -- Dedication ceremonies for several new buildings on the campus of Topeka's Menninger Foundation (20th anniversary). -- Sources: "Kansas Day by Day," by Roy Bird; "399 Kansas Characters," by Dave Webb; "The Beginning of the West," by Louise Barry; Topeka Capital-Journal archives. Related Searches

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Anchored by the star Antares, the constellation Scorpius represents what animal?

Scorpius Constellation on Top Astronomer Scorpius Please hover over any star to get more information Scorpius is a constellation in the southern hemisphere, located near the centre of the Milky Way galaxy. It was one of the constellations introduced by the Greek astronomer Ptolemy in the 2nd century. Scorpius represents the scorpion that stung and killed Orion, the mythical hunter who boasted that he could kill any wild animal. The Earth sent the scorpion to kill Orion after hearing what he had said. In another version of the Greek tale, it was the goddess Artemis who sent the scorpion after Orion had tried to ravish her. Even today, it is said that Orion flees under the horizon whenever Scorpius rises in the sky. The two constellations are placed opposite each other. The Sumerians also identified the constellation with the scorpion, or Gir-tab. Scorpius is depicted with its tail and sting poised in the air, ready to strike. The constellation Scorpius occupies an area of 497 square degrees and contains ten stars with known planets. It can be seen at latitudes between +40° and -90° and is best visible at 9 p.m. during the month of July. Astronomically, the Sun lingers in Scorpius only for a week, from November 23 to November 30, but most astrologers consider it to be in the sign of Scorpio from October 23 to November 23. In sidereal astrology, the Sun passes through Scorpio from November 16 to December 16. Scorpius contains a number of bright stars, most of which are members of the Scorpius-Centaurus Association, the closest stellar association to our solar system. The brightest star in the constellation is [7516] alpha Scorpii, or Antares ("like Mars"), named for its reddish-orange colour, which resembles that of the planet Mars. Antares is a red supergiant with a radius about 800 times that of the Sun. It is classified as a variable star; its apparent magnitude varies between 0.9 and 1.8. It has a hot blue companion star about 2.9 arcseconds away. Antares is the 16th brightest star in the sky. It is approximately 600 light-years distant from Earth. It is also of the brightest stars near the ecliptic, the Sun’s apparent path in the sky. The only other first magnitude stars on the ecliptic are [7931] Aldebaran (alpha Tauri), [8774] Spica (alpha Virginis) and [4806] Regulus (alpha Leonis). Antares is significant in many different cultures. In Arab tradition, it was said to be the star of the warrior poet Antarah ibn Shaddad. Arabs also used to call the star Kalb al Akrab ("the scorpion's hart"), a translation of the ancient Greek name for the star, Kardia Scorpiou, as well as the Latin, Cor Scorpii. In Egyptian tradition, the light of Antares played an important part in the ceremonies performed in the temples. Ancient Persians called the star Satevis and considered it to be one of the four "royal stars." Antares was also important in the religion of Stregheria, a pagan, pre-Christian religion in Italy in which the star was believed to be a fallen angel and guardian of the western gate. In ancient India, Antares was known as Jyeshtha. [7517] lambda Scorpii, the second brightest star in Scorpius, is also called Shaula ("the sting"). It is located at the end of the scorpion’s tail, marking the sting. Shaula is a multiple star, composed of a B-type subgiant, which is itself a triple star, and two fainter companions. The primary star is classified as a Beta Cephei variable, a star that shows changes in luminosity because of pulsations on its surface. Shaula is approximately 700 light-years distant. [7522] - [7553] beta Scorpii, also known as Graffias ("claws") and Acrab ("scorpion"), is another multiple star system. The Chinese called it the Fourth Star of the Room. Acrab appears as a binary star composed of two hot, B-class stars that are suspected spectroscopic binaries themselves. [7520] delta Scorpii, or Dschubba ("forehead") marks the middle of the scorpion’s head. It is also known as Dzuba, Iclarcrau and Iclarkrav. It is a multiple star with a hot class B star for the primary component. It lies about 402 light-years from Earth. [7518] theta Scorpii is a yellow giant star approximately 270 light-years distant, whose luminosity is 960 times that of the Sun. It is also known by its Sumerian names Girtab ("the scorpion") and Sargas, whose meaning has been lost. [7535] nu Scorpii or Jabbah ("forehead") has at least four components, split into two groups. The brighter pair consists of B class subgiants and the fainter pair is composed of B class main sequence dwarfs. The star system lies approximately 437 light-years from Earth. It is the light of nu Scorpii that illuminates the large reflection nebula IC 4592, also located in Scorpius. [7545] xi Scorpii has at least five components, split into two groups lying 4.67 arcminutes away from each other. The brighter group contains two yellow-white F-type stars – a subgiant and a dwarf – and a fainter companion. The fainter group consists of two K-type stars. [7525] pi Scorpii, another multiple star system, is composed of a contact binary star of the Beta Lyrae type and a fainter, more distant companion. Both components of the contact binary are hot blue-white dwarfs. Pi Scorpii is approximately 459 light-years distant. [7528] mu-1 Scorpii is another example of an eclipsing binary star of the Beta Lyrae type. Both components are blue-white stars; one is a subgiant and the other a dwarf. The system is about 822 light-years away from Earth. [7526] sigma Scorpii is also known as Al Niyat ("the arteries"), a name it shares with [7524] tau Scorpii. It is another multiple star, 735 light-years distant. Its primary component is a blue-white giant classified as a Beta Cephei variable. [7524] tau Scorpii is a blue-white dwarf, approximately 430 light-years distant. [7523] upsilon Scorpii, or Lesath ("bite of a poisonous animal"), is another hot B-class star, a subgiant, in the constellation. It is approximately 520 light-years distant and has luminosity 12,300 times that of the Sun. Scorpius also contains several notable deep sky objects. The Butterfly Cluster, or Messier 6 (NGC 6405) is an open cluster of stars that form a shape similar to that of a butterfly. The brightest star in the cluster is BM Scorpii, an orange supergiant, while most of the other bright members are hot, blue B-type stars. The Ptolemy Cluster, named after the Greek astronomer, is also known as Messier 7 or NGC 6475. It is an open cluster visible to the naked eye, located near the scorpion's sting. It contains about 80 stars. Messier 4 (NGC 6121) is a globular cluster easily found and observed even in very small telescopes. It lies 1.3 degrees away from [7516] Antares. The cluster is approximately 7,200 light-years distant. It is one of the closest globular clusters to Earth. Messier 80 (NGC 6093) is another globular cluster in Scorpius. It can be found halfway between [7516] alpha and [7522] - [7553] beta Scorpii. It is one of the densest globular clusters in the Milky Way, containing several hundred thousand stars. Messier 80 lies 32,600 light-years from Earth. NGC 6231 is an open cluster that can be seen near zeta Scorpii. [7544] zeta-1 Scorpii (HR 6262) belongs to the cluster and is the hottest star in it. NGC 6231 is believed to be only 3.2 million years old. It belongs to the Scorpius OB Association of very young stars. The cluster is approaching us at the speed of 22 kilometres per second.

Scorpion

For a point each, name the countries that share a physical border with the Kingdom of Lesotho

ZODIAC CONSTELLATIONS Zodiac Constellations Zodiacal Motion of the Outer Planets Each year the Sun moves eastward in a complete circle around the sky. The path followed by the Sun is called the ecliptic , and any constellation containing the ecliptic is called a zodiac constellation. The constellations of the zodiac are listed below, in order as the Sun moves eastwardly through them, starting from the constellation containing the Sun at the vernal equinox (thus it is visible overhead at night in the fall, six months later). Zodiac Constellation Pisces (Pie-seez) Two fish. Venus and her son Cupid escaped from Typhon by swimming through the sea as two fish. Red star TX Piscium varies in brightness. Fall Ram with Golden Fleece, could fly through the air. A small constellation, with only two easily-visible stars. Winter Taurus (Tore-us) Bull. Babylonian constellation. Jupiter turned himself into a bull to carry off Europa, daughter of the King of Crete. Reddish eye the star Aldebaran, one vertex of the Winter Hexagon , in a V-shaped grouping called the Hyades. Look at Pleiades, a jewel-box of stars, with binoculars. Winter (Jem-eh-ni) Twin brothers. Protectors of ships and sailors, who swore oaths by them: "By Jiminy!" Look for the two bright stars, Castor and Pollux, which together form one vertex of the Winter Hexagon . Winter (Kan-ser) Crab, sent by Juno to kill Hercules, who squashed it with his foot. Faint stars. Look with binoculars for the Beehive star cluster, faintly visible to the naked eye. Spring Lion. Prehistoric constellation, often associated with royalty. Look for sickle-shaped or backward-question-mark asterism. Bright star Regulus. Spring Maiden, goddess of farms and harvest, holding a shock of wheat. Second-largest constellation in sky. Bright star Spica. Cluster of galaxies. Bright quasar. Spring Libra (Lee-brah) Scales (balance), because the Sun was in Libra during the autumn equinox when the Romans chopped off the claws of Scorpius to create this constellation. Two faint stars. Includes the traditional claws of Scorpius. Alpha-Librae is a double-star resolvable by binoculars. Spring Scorpius (Scor-pee-us) Scorpion sent by Gaia to kill Orion when Orion boasted he would slay all the animals of the Earth; now Orion and Scorpius circle each other on opposite sides of the sky. Fish-hook to Polynesians; rises right out of water in the SE in the summer. Bright star Antares, the heart of the Scorpion, rivals Mars in its reddish tint. Summer Ophiuchus (Oh-fee-uke-us) The serpent holder, Oph. ("Gus" for short) represents Aesclepius the healer. Although not traditionally considered part of the zodiac, the sun now is actually within Oph. longer than it is in Scorpius. Faint stars. Look for Ophiuchus holding the Serpent (Serpens) between Arcturus ( Bootes ; locate with Big Dipper ) and Altair ( Aquila ; cf. Summer Triangle ). Summer (Saj-eh-tair-ee-us) The Archer, a centaur (half man and half horse) archer named Chiron, shooting an arrow. Look for teapot asterism. In direction of the center of the Milky Way galaxy, rich with many stars. Try binoculars. Summer

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Introduced by the Raytheon Corporation in 1947, what ubiquitous modern day convenience was originally sold under the name Radarange, based on its use of the magnetron, a major component of radar systems?

CSS Forums - Inventions and Discoveries Tuesday, November 06, 2007 03:51 PM [B][CENTER][U][SIZE="4"]electricity[/SIZE][/U][/CENTER][/B] [B][U]Alternating Current[/U][/B] [B]Induction Coil / Transformer[/B] In the 1880s every system for distributing electricity used direct current (DC). But DC transmission over long distances was impractical. Transmitting at low voltage required thick wires. Transmitting at high voltage was dangerous and could not be reduced for consumer uses such as lighting. It was known that alternating current (AC) voltage could be varied by use of induction coils, but no practical coil system had been invented. Stanley's design for such a coil-or 'transformer' as it is now called-became the prototype for all future transformers. [B]System of Distribution by Alternating Currents[/B] Charles Proteus Steinmetz Born Apr 9 1865 - Died Oct 26 1923 System of Distribution by Alternating Currents Alternating Current Patent Number(s) 533,244 Inducted 1977 In 1893, Steinmetz joined the newly organized General Electric Company in Schenectady, New York, serving as consulting engineer until his death. Steinmetz's first important research was on the phenomenon of hysteresis, by which power is lost because of magnetic resistance. This research led him directly to a study of alternating current, which could eliminate hysteresis loss in motors. The difficulty was that there was really no theory of alternating current by which the electrical engineer could be guided. Steinmetz set out to remedy this deficiency. During the next 20 years he prepared a series of masterful papers and volumes which reduced the theory of alternating current to order. Steinmetz's last research was on lightning, which threatened to disrupt the new AC power lines. Here again he made fundamental contributions. Without Charles Steinmetz's development of theories of alternating current, the expansion of the electric power industry in the United States in the early 20th century would have been impossible, or at least greatly delayed. [B]Electro-Magnetic Motor[/B] Nikola Tesla invented the induction motor with rotating magnetic field that made unit drives for machines feasible and made AC power transmission an economic necessity. In 1887 and 1888 Tesla had an experimental shop at 89 Liberty Street, New York, and there he invented the induction motor. He sold the invention to Westinghouse in July 1888 and spent a year in Pittsburgh instructing Westinghouse engineers. [B]Improvement in Steam-Power Brake Devices[/B] George Westinghouse invented a system of air brakes that made travel by train safe and built one of the greatest electric manufacturing organizations in the United States. After briefly attending Union College he returned to his father's shop, where he developed and patented a rotary steam engine, a device for replacing derailed freight cars, and a railroad frog. He then worked to develop a system of railroad brakes that would centralize control in the hands of the engineer. He was awarded the first of many air brake patents in 1869 and at the age of 22 organized the Westinghouse Air Brake Company. [B][U]Electric Lamp[/U][/B] One of the outstanding geniuses in the history of technology, Thomas Edison earned patents for more than a thousand inventions, including the incandescent electric lamp, the phonograph, the carbon telephone transmitter, and the motion-picture projector. In addition, he created the world's first industrial research laboratory. In September 1878, after having viewed an exhibition of a series of eight glaring 500-candlepower arc lights, Edison boldly announced he would invent a safe, mild, and inexpensive electric light that would replace the gaslight in millions of homes; moreover, he would accomplish this by an entirely different method of current distribution from that used for arc lights. To back the lamp effort, some of New York's leading financial figures joined with Edison in October 1878 to form the Edison Electric Light Company, the predecessor of today's General Electric Company. On October 21,1879, Edison demonstrated the carbon-filament lamp, supplied with current by his special high-voltage dynamos. The pilot light-and-power station at Menlo Park glowed with a circuit of 30 lamps, each of which could be turned on or off without affecting the rest. Three years later, the Pearl Street central power station in downtown New York City was completed, initiating the electrical illumination of the cities of the world. In 1887 Edison moved his workshop from Menlo Park to West Orange, New Jersey, where he built the Edison Laboratory (now a national monument), a facility 10 times larger than the earlier one. In time it was surrounded with factories employing some 5,000 persons and producing a variety of new products, among them his improved phonograph using wax records, the mimeograph, fluoroscope, alkaline storage battery, dictating machine, and motion-picture cameras and projectors. During World War I, the aged inventor headed the Naval Consulting Board and directed research in torpedo mechanisms and antisubmarine devices. It was largely owing to his urging that Congress established the Naval Research Laboratory, the first institution for military research, in 1920. Throughout his career, Edison consciously directed his studies to devices that could satisfy real needs and come into popular use. Indeed, it may be said that in applying himself to technology, he was fulfilling the ideals of democracy, for he centered his attention upon projects that would increase the convenience and pleasure of mankind. [B]Incandescent Electric Lamp[/B] Irving Langmuir's work led to two major inventions: the high-vacuum electron tube and the gas-filled incandescent lamp. [B][U]Fluorescent Lamp[/U][/B] Germer received the Frank P. Brown Medal from the Franklin Institute in 1954 for his fluorescent lamp. Edmund Germer's development of the fluorescent lamp and the high-pressure mercury-vapor lamp significantly increased the efficiency of lighting devices, allowing for more economical lighting while producing less heat than incandescent light. [B][U]Laser[/U][/B] [B]Optically Pumped Laser Amplifiers; Light Amplifiers Employing Collisions to Produce a Population Inversion [/B] Gordon Gould coined the word laser and patented optically pumped and discharge excited laser amplifiers now used in most industrial, commercial, and medical applications of lasers. Gould and his assignee, Patlex Corporation, now hold the basic patents covering optically pumped and discharge excited laser amplifiers. These lasers are used in 80 percent of the industrial, commercial, and medical applications of lasers. Gould also holds patents on laser uses and fiber optic communications. [B]Ruby Laser Systems[/B] Physicist Theodore Harold Maiman invented the first operable laser. While employed at Hughes Research Laboratories as a section head in 1960, he developed, demonstrated, and patented a laser using a pink ruby medium, for which he gained worldwide recognition. The laser�s impact has rippled through numerous industries. Laser beams are being used in medicine, industry, electronic, data processing, communications, and scientific research in a myriad of ways. Doctors use them to remove tattoos and port wine stains (birthmarks), to repair detached retinas, and to perform bloodless surgery. Industry uses lasers to weld, drill, cut, seam, mark, and heat treat with the effect of high yield, excellent reproducibility, and higher throughput with consequence of improved productivity. Electronic firms use lasers to trim resistors and capacitors and to fashion and anneal transistor �chips� to extremely high accuracy. Lasers are used in supermarket scanners to automate checkout; and now are used in the home in optical videodisc players. With the use of the laser, written and read-out, optical memory will increase storage capacity of computer information to 100 times the density of a magnetic disc or tape. Another innovation is the use of lasers to transmit light for miles without repeaters through hair-thin glass fibers to replace traditional wires in communication. Early on, laser beams were used to measure the 200,000 mile distance to the moon � within one inch. Many scientists predict lasers will play a significant role in harnessing the power of hydrogen ions � known as atomic fusion � in the future. [B]Masers and Maser Communications System [/B] Arthur L. Schawlow was co-inventor of the laser. He worked with Charles H. Townes, who was inducted into the National Inventors Hall of Fame in 1976. Schawlow and Townes were seeking ways to extend the maser principle of amplifying electromagnetic waves into the shorter wavelengths of infrared and visible light. They published a proposal for the laser in a 1958 issue of Physical Review and received a patent for it in 1960. By the end of the 1960s, eye surgeons were already routinely using lasers, taking advantage of the fact that they can be made minutely small and precisely focused. In 1961, Schawlow became professor of physics at Stanford University. It was in 1981 that Schawlow received the Nobel Prize in physics for his work in laser spectroscopy. Today, the laser is prevalent in many areas, including the medical, defense and communications fields. [B]Production of Electromagnetic Energy; Masers and Maser Communications System[/B] Charles Townes' invention of the maser, a device that amplifies electromagnetic waves, created a means for the sensitive reception of communications and for precise navigation. The maser provided basic components of the laser, for which Townes also received a patent. The difference between a maser and a laser is that the laser utilizes visible light. Apart from being useful tools in the laboratory, both masers and lasers have found many applications in radar, communications, astronomy, navigation, atomic clocks, surgery, and industry. [B][U]Magnetron[/U][/B] [B]Asymmetrically Conductive Device and Method of Making the Same[/B] Robert Hall invented the version of the magnetron that operates most microwave ovens, the semiconductor laser found in compact disk players, and power rectifiers that greatly improved power transmission efficiency. His basic rectifier structure, with silicon replacing the germanium, is used today for AC-to-DC power conversion in electric locomotives and high-voltage DC electrical transmission. In 1962 Hall invented the semiconductor injection laser, a device now used in all compact disk players and laser printers, and most optical fiber communications systems. [B]High Efficiency Magnetron[/B] Percy Spencer, while working for the Raytheon Company, discovered a more efficient way to manufacture magnetrons. In 1941, magnetrons were being produced at a rate of 17 per day. Spencer set out to create a simpler magnetron that could be mass produced. The result was a magnetron that replaced precision copper bars with lamina and replaced soldered internal wires with a simple solid ring. These improvements and others allowed for the faster production of 2,600 magnetrons per day. In 1945, Spencer created a device to cook food using microwave radiation. Raytheon saw the possibilities of this, and after acquiring Amana Refrigeration in 1965, was able to sell microwave ovens on a large scale. The first microwave oven was called the Radarange, and today, there are over 200 million in use throughout the world. This discovery led to significant advances in radar and his most popular invention, the microwave oven. [QUOTE][B]Note:[/B] In order to make this thread more fruitful, Members are requested to add in this regard. Thank you very much [/QUOTE] Sureshlasi Friday, November 09, 2007 06:08 PM [CENTER][B][U][SIZE="5"]Imaging[/SIZE][/U][/B][/CENTER] [B][U]Electrophotography[/U][/B] Physicist Chester F. Carlson, the father of xerographic printing, was born in Seattle, Washington. Plagued by needs for copies of patent drawings and specifications, Carlson investigated ways of automatic text and illustration reproduction, working out of his apartment. While others sought chemical or photographic solutions to 'instant copying' problems, Carlson turned to electrostatics and in 1938 succeeded in obtaining his first 'dry-copy' and the first of many patents two years later. It took presentations to more than 20 companies before Carlson was able to interest the Battelle Development Corporation in his invention in 1944. In 1947 the Haloid Company-renamed Xerox Corporation-negotiated commercial rights to his xerographic development. Eleven years later, and just 10 years before his death in 1968, Xerox introduced its first office copier. [B][U]High Resolution Radar and Sonar[/U][/B] Robert H. Rines' contributions to the technology of high-resolution image-scanning radar and sonar began in the era of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology's Radiation Laboratory with modulation techniques for the Microwave Early Warning System developed secretly during World War II. In peace time, his inventions were basic to high-definition sonar scanning systems used in locating the Titanic and the Bismarck. They are also used in new medical instrumentation allowing noninvasive ultrasound imaging of internal organs. His patents underlie nearly all the high-definition image-scanning radar used to provide early-warning, weapons fire-control, and some artillery and missile detection radars during the war in the Persian Gulf. [B][U]Multiplane Camera[/U][/B] Seldom has an individual become so intrinsically linked to a concept as Walt Disney has with the concept of imagination. His was the catalyst for his incredible body of work, which in turn fed the imagination of millions who have been inspired by it. Disney�s invention of the multiplane camera brought better looking, richer animation and in 1937, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was the first full-length animated film to use the camera. The movies that Disney created are amazingly diverse and illustrate the range of his inventiveness. [B][U]Photo Composing Machine[/U][/B] Louis Marius Moyroud and Rene Alphonse Higonnet developed the first practical phototypesetting machine. Born in Moirans, Isere, France, Moyroud attended engineering school from 1929 to 1936 and graduated as an engineer from Ecole Nationale Superieure des Arts et Metiers of Cluny, France. He served in the military as a second lieutenant from 1936 to 1938 and as a first lieutenant in 1939 and 1940. He joined the LMT Laboratories, a subsidiary in Paris of ITT, in 1941 and left in 1946 to spend all of his time on photocomposition. Moyroud and Higonnet first demonstrated their first phototypesetting machine, the Lumitype-later known as the Photon-in September 1946 and introduced it to America in 1948. The Photon was further refined under the direction of the Graphic Arts Research Foundations. The first book to be composed by the Photon was printed in 1953, titled The Wonderful World of Insects. Composed without the use of metal type, it might someday rank in the historical importance of printing with the first book printed from moveable type, the Gutenberg Bible. In recent years, Moyroud has been instrumental in the development of the Euorcat Series of phototypesetting machines marketed in Europe by Bobst Graphics. Fellow communications engineer Higonnet was born in Valence, Drome, France. The son of a teacher, he was educated at the Lyc�e de Tournon and the Electrical Engineering School of Grenoble University. He was granted a scholarship by the International Institute of Education in New York in 1922, went to Carleton College in Minnesota for one year, and subsequently spent one term at the Harvard Engineering School. He was an engineer with the Materiel Telephonique, a French subsidiary of ITT, from 1924 to 1948. He then became a transmission engineer and worked on long distance cables in Paris-Strasbourg, London-Brussels, and Vienna-Budapest. He was also associated with the Patent and Information Department of ITT. [B][U]Photography[/U][/B] [B]Method and Apparatus for Coating Plates for use in Photography[/B] Eastman began his search for a transparent and flexible film in 1884. The first commercial film, put into production a year later, was cut in narrow strips and wound on a roller device patented by Eastman and Walker. Film rolls sufficient for 100 exposures were mounted in a small box camera-the Kodak, which was introduced in 1888 priced at $25. The steady improvement of Edison's motion-picture camera also spurred Eastman to perfect a stronger film designed to fill that promising market. George Eastman's inventions of dry, rolled film and the hand-held cameras that could utilize it revolutionized photography. [B]Stroboscope Photography[/B] Pioneering research in stroboscopic photography by Harold E. Edgerton was the foundation for the development of the modern electronic speed flash. Edgerton earned international recognition for his achievements in the related fields of stroboscopy and ultra-high speed photography. The electronic speed flash his research spurred is important to science and industry as well as routine photography. He originally perfected the use of stroboscopic lights in both ultra-high-speed motion and still (stop-motion) photography capable of revealing operations which move at speeds beyond the perceptive capacity of the human eye (i.e., bullets in flight, light bulbs shattering, etc.). [B]Photographic Product Comprising a Rupturable Container Carrying a Photographic Processing Liquid [/B] Physicist, manufacturing executive, and inventor Edwin Herbert Land developed the first modern polarizers for light, a sequence of subsequent polarizers, and theories and practices for applications of polarized light. [B][U]Video Tape Recording[/U][/B] [B]Broad Band Magnetic Tape Systems and Method[/B] Charles Ginsburg led the research team at Ampex Corporation in developing the first practical videotape recorder (VTR). The system used a rapidly rotating recording head to apply high-frequency signals onto a reel of magnetic tape. The VTR revolutionized television broadcasting. Ginsburg led the Ampex research team that developed a new machine that could run the tape at a much slower rate because the recording heads rotated at high speed, allowing the necessary high-frequency response. Recorded programs that could be edited replaced most live broadcasts. In 1956, CBS became the first network to employ VTR technology. Sureshlasi Saturday, November 10, 2007 03:16 AM [B][U][CENTER][SIZE="5"][CENTER]Medical[/CENTER][/SIZE][/CENTER][/U][/B] [B][U]Anti-Leukemia drugs[/U][/B] Gertrude Belle Elion invented the leukemia-fighting drug 6-mercaptopurine and drugs that facilitated kidney transplants. Hired by Burroughs-Wellcome (now Glaxo Wellcome) in 1944, she began work on antagonists of nucleic acid building blocks. This led to the synthesis of 6-mercaptopurine, a drug quickly marketed as Purinethol, and to another antileukemic drug, 6-thioguanine. Her continued research led to Imuran, a derivative of 6-mercaptopurine that was found to block the body's rejection of foreign tissues. In combination with other drugs, Imuran enabled kidney transplants from unrelated donors. Elion and her team were prominent in the development of allopurinol (trade name Zyloprim), for treatment of gout, and of a new antiviral agent, acyclovir (Zovirax), which has been used to battle herpes virus infections. [B][U]Artificial Heart[/U][/B] Medical researcher Willem J. Kolff invented the artificial kidney dialysis machine. The artificial kidney dialysis machine Kolff invented has been perfected through a series of improvements so that there are an estimated 55,000 people in the U.S. with end-stage renal disease that are being kept alive by this invention or a subsequent modification of it. There are an estimated 55,000 people in the U.S. with end-stage renal disease that are being kept alive by this invention or a subsequent modification of it. [B][U]CAT Scan[/U][/B] Robert S. Ledley invented the whole-body CT (computerized tomographic) diagnostic X-ray scanner. The ACTA Scanner set the fundamental design for modern CT scanners, including the first use of the convolution method for CT-image reconstruction, the first high-resolution digital TV display for medical imaging, and the tilting gantry. Ledley used ACTA to revolutionize diagnostic medicine. He was the first to do medical imaging and three-dimensional reconstructions and the first to use CT in radiation therapy planning for cancer patients and in the diagnosis of bone diseases. [B][U]Cortisone[/U][/B] [B]Preparation of Cortisone[/B] Percy Lavon Julian synthesized physostigmine for treatment of glaucoma and cortisone for the treatment of rheumatoid arthritis. His synthesis of cortisone reduced the price of cortisone from hundreds of dollars per drop for natural cortisone to a few cents per gram. [B]Process of Treating Pregnene Compounds[/B] Chemist Lewis Hastings Sarett prepared a synthetic version of the hormone cortisone, which was soon demonstrated as an effective treatment against rheumatoid arthritis. Sarett prepared the first synthetic cortisone in 1944, when Merck & Co. was a participant in a government effort to improve military medicine. Four years later the Mayo Clinic demonstrated the efficacy of the product against rheumatoid arthritis. In 1949, Sarett and several collaborators initiated an alternative synthesis commencing with raw materials derivable from coal, air, lime, and water. This led to the first route independent of naturally occurring starting materials. [B][U]Embolectomy Catheter[/U][/B] In 1963, Thomas Fogarty received a patent for his Fogarty� balloon embolectomy catheter, which has since become an industry standard. The device allows a thin balloon to be inserted into a patient's artery and guided through an occlusion. It is then inflated and withdrawn along with the blockage. Fogarty's catheter revolutionized vascular surgery--it is still the most widely used technique for blood clot removal--and encouraged advances for other minimally invasive surgeries, including angioplasty. Working with his biomedical design engineers at Fogarty Research, Fogarty has developed many balloon devices that are used in laparoscopy-assisted surgical procedures. Other products include a minimally invasive device for breast cancer diagnosis and therapy and a self-expanding stent-graft used to treat aortic aneurysms less invasively to reduce trauma. A native of Cincinnati, Fogarty attended Xavier University and then went on to the University of Cincinnati Medical School. [B][U]Genetic Engineering[/U][/B] [B]Process for Producing Biologically Functional Molecular Chimeras[/B] Herb Boyer was with the University of California, San Francisco when he began investigating DNA with Stan Cohen. Their experiments marked the beginning of genetic engineering and launched the multi-billion dollar biotechnology industry. By early 1973, Boyer and Cohen determined that they were able to add genes from an organism to a simple cell; the genes would then replicate in the cell. Their recombinant DNA patents generated over $250 million in royalties before expiring. Recombinant DNA technology is considered the most significant achievement in molecular biology since Watson & Crick's work in 1953. After working with Cohen, Boyer joined forces with venture capitalist Robert Swanson to create the biotechnology firm Genentech, Inc. Since its founding in 1976, Genentech has produced a number of firsts such as genetically engineered human insulin. Genetically altered crops are also being researched to deal with global food supply issues. [B][U]Glucose Detection for Diabetes[/U][/B] [B]Composition of Matter[/B] In the mid-1940s, Alfred Free and Helen Murray were both chemists working together in the biochemistry research group at Miles Laboratories, Inc., in Elkhart, Indiana. Married in 1947, they continued their collaboration, becoming two of the world�s leading experts on urinalysis.The Frees co-authored two books: Urodynamics and Urinalysis in Laboratory Practice, both considered notable works in the field. Their contributions include the development of dry reagents that have become the standard in laboratory urinalysis and the more consumer-oriented "dip-and-read" tests that first enabled diabetics to easily and accurately monitor their blood glucose levels on their own. [B][U]Implantable Pacemaker[/U][/B] Wilson Greatbatch invented the cardiac pacemaker, an innovation selected in 1983 by the National Society of Professional Engineers as one of the two major engineering contributions to society during the previous 50 years. Greatbatch has established a series of companies to manufacture or license his inventions, including Greatbatch Enterprises, which produces most of the world's pacemaker batteries. His original pacemaker patent resulted in the first implantable cardiac pacemaker, which has led to heart patient survival rates comparable to that of a healthy population of similar age. [B][U]MRI[/U][/B] Raymond Damadian invented the magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) scanner, which has revolutionized the field of diagnostic medicine. The MRI obtains information through the use of static and dynamic magnetic fields, a method that yields radio signal outputs from the body's tissue that can be either transformed into images or analyzed to provide the chemical composition of the tissue being examined. His MRI produced images of the interior of the body far more detailed than was possible with X-ray devices such as the CAT scanner. Since the device's approval in 1984 by the Food and Drug Administration hundreds have been put to use in medical institutions around the world. [B][U]Nystatin (Antifungal / Antibiotic)[/U][/B] [B]Nystatin and Method of Producing It[/B] The world's first useful antifungal antibiotic, nystatin, was developed through a long-distance scientific collaboration. Working as researchers for the New York State Department of Health, Rachel Fuller Brown in Albany and Elizabeth Lee Hazen in New York City shared tests and samples through the U.S. mail. To Hazen's single-minded pursuit of an antifungal antibiotic, Brown added the skills needed to identify, characterize, and purify the various substances produced by culturing bacteria found in hundreds of soil samples. The antibiotic they developed, named 'nystatin' for the New York State Department of Health, was first introduced in practical form in 1954 following Food and Drug Administration approval. Not only did it cure many disfiguring and disabling fungal infections of the skin, mouth, throat, and intestinal tract, but it could be combined with antibacterial drugs to balance their effects. Uses for nystatin have been as varied as treating Dutch elm disease to rescuing water-damaged works of art from molds. [B][U]Oral Contraceptives[/U][/B] Frank B. Colton developed Enovid, the first oral contraceptive. Colton has made many important contributions to medicinal organic chemistry and particularly to steroid chemistry. His pioneering research on the relationship between structure and biological activity, particularly of 19-nor steroids, led to the development of Nilevar, the first orally active anabolic agent which had a distinct separation between protein building and masculinizing properties. Of even greater importance was his research which resulted in the discovery of Enovid. The introduction of this substance in 1960 for family planning purposes ushered in the era of oral contraception. Carl Djerassi is recognized for his breakthroughs in chemistry and for his effective translation of theory into practice. His achievements include establishing physical methods for determining organic molecular structure and the synthesis of many steroids. His work led to oral contraceptives, antihistamines, and anti-inflammatory agents. [B][U]Penicillin[/U][/B] Andrew J. Moyer's discoveries provided the foundation for the industrial production of penicillin. The potential of using penicillin to treat wounded soldiers was immediately recognized in World War II. However the concept of antibiotics was new, and a practical method for large-scale production was not available. Treatments required from 1-2 million Oxford units of the substance. The urgency of finding a method for mass-producing penicillin led to international cooperation. In the United States, the task was assigned to Moyer, who found that by culturing the Penicillium mold in a culture broth comprising corn steep liquor and lactose, penicillin yields could be increased many fold. This was the first known use of corn steep liquor for growing microorganisms. Moyer also discovered that with this improved medium, the fermentation could be conducted with continuous shaking, thereby further enhancing the yields and production rate. These discoveries led to industrial penicillin production, which saved thousands of lives during the war. Moyer's work also provided a model for the development of all other antibiotic fermentations. Corn steep liquor is still used in the commercial fermentation processes for making penicillin and many other antibiotics. Moyer contributed to 10 U.S. patents. [B]Displacement of the Thiazolidine Ring in Penicillin with the Formation of a Biologically Active Cephem System[/B] Sir Alexander Fleming's 1928 discovery of penicillin in bread mold was a tremendous breakthrough for medical science. Unfortunately, Fleming's process for harvesting the antibiotic took months to generate a small amount. During World War II, as demand for penicillin rose, researchers worked feverishly to synthesize the penicillin molecule. More than a thousand scientists in 39 U.S. labs became involved in the project. But when the war ended and the molecule still had not revealed its structure, the funds for research ended. From 1948 to 1957 only one laboratory of continued the research-John Sheehan's. In March of 1957, while a professor at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Sheehan announced the first rational total synthesis of natural penicillin. The next year he reported a general total synthesis of penicillins. [B][U]Pentothal / Anesthesia[/U][/B] [B]Thiobarbituric Acid Derivatives[/B] Ernest H. Volwiler and Donalee L. Tabern discovered the general anesthetic Pentothal, one of the most important agents in modern medicine. Volwiler and Tabern discovered Pentothal in 1936 when they were seeking a substance which could be injected directly into the blood stream to produce unconsciousness. For three years the two men screened over 200 compounds, eventually arriving at a sulfur-bearing analogue of Nembutal. Induction was smooth, pleasant, free of muscle twitching, and notably lacking in delirium or frightening psychic effects. It could be used for minor procedures requiring anesthesia or for more prolonged procedures, being administered before ether. As a result of his efforts, Abbott in 1948 became the first pharmaceutical company to supply radio pharmaceuticals to medical and research institutions. The uses of Pentothal are legend. Few agents in medicine have played such an outstanding role in improving the well-being of generations of patients. [B][U]Pronged Vaccinating Needle[/U][/B] Microbiologist Benjamin A. Rubin ground the eyelet of a sewing machine needle into a fork shape to create a vaccine delivery system that helped wipe out the killer disease smallpox. Until relatively recently smallpox was a dreaded disease, killing at least two million people annually until 1967. Smallpox could be controlled by vaccination, but the vaccine was always in short supply and, in undeveloped areas of the world, it was difficult to conduct vaccinations. Rubin was working for Wyeth Laboratories in 1965 when he began experimenting with alternatives to the conventional syringe needle. Further refinements to his ground-sewing-needle design yielded the now-familiar bifurcated (fork-shaped) needle, which he discovered would hold enough vaccine in the small space between the tines to inoculate a person with a few jabs. Rubin's needle sped vaccinations worldwide, and in 1980 the World Health Assembly declared smallpox defeated. For the first time in history, man had eradicated a deadly disease. [B][U]Respirator / Ventilator[/U][/B] [B]Fluid Control Device; Respirator; Pediatric Ventilator[/B] On television every week in the 1960s, Dr. Kildare committed himself to making his patients better. But try as he might, some would still not respond to his treatment. At those times his hospital's slogan was, when all else fails, 'get the Bird.' 'The Bird' was a little green box which became familiar to hospital patients throughout the world after it was introduced in 1958. It was the first highly reliable, low-cost, mass-produced medical respirator in the world, and it was invented by Forrest Bird. The 'Babybird' respirator, introduced in 1970, quickly reduced infant mortality for those with respiratory problems from 70 percent to less than 10 percent worldwide. [B][U]Tetracycline[/U][/B] Lloyd H. Conover invented the antibiotic tetracycline, which became the most prescribed broad spectrum antibiotic in the United States within three years and remains the drug of choice for a number of serious bacterial infections. Tetracycline was the first therapeutically superior drug to be made by chemical alteration of an antibiotic produced by microbial metabolism. It sparked a wide-scale search for superior structurally modified antibiotics, which has provided most of the important antibiotic discoveries made since then. [B][U]Vaccine for Hepatitis B[/U][/B] [B]Vaccine Against Viral Hepatitis and Process; Process of Viral Diagnosis and Reagent [/B] Baruch Blumberg discovered an antigen in 1963 that detected the presence of hepatitis B in blood samples. Hepatitis B is a potentially fatal disease often transmitted through blood transfusions. This hepatitis antigen, 'the Australia Antigen,' was found frequently in the blood serum of viral hepatitis sufferers. The antigen was named for an aborigine blood sample that reacted with an antibody in the serum of an American hemophilia patient. Working with Blumberg, microbiologist Irving Millman developed a test that identified hepatitis B in blood samples. The blood test screened out carriers of this infectious disease, and after blood banks began using the test in 1971, hepatitis B after blood transfusions decreased by 25 percent. The test also became the first method for screening blood donations for the hepatitis B virus. Together, Blumberg and Millman developed a vaccine against the virus. This vaccine protects people exposed to hepatitis B from infection and has been administered to millions, particularly in Asia and Africa. Since hepatitis B is an unknown factor associated with the development of liver cancer, the vaccine was the first against a major form of cancer. [B]Vaccine Against Viral Hepatitis and Process; Process of Viral Diagnosis and Reagent [/B] In 1963, Baruch Blumberg discovered an antigen that detected the presence of hepatitis B in blood samples. Hepatitis B is a potentially fatal disease often transmitted through blood transfusions. This hepatitis antigen, 'the Australia Antigen,' was found frequently in the blood serum of viral hepatitis sufferers. The antigen was named for an aborigine blood sample that reacted with an antibody in the serum of an American hemophilia patient. Working with Blumberg, microbiologist Irving Millman developed a test that identified hepatitis B in blood samples. The blood test screened out carriers of this infectious disease, and after blood banks began using the test in 1971, hepatitis B after blood transfusions decreased by 25 percent. The test also became the first method for screening blood donations for the hepatitis B virus. Together, Blumberg and Millman developed a vaccine against the virus. This vaccine protects people exposed to hepatitis B from infection and has been a dministered to millions, particularly in Asia and Africa. Since hepatitis B is an unknown factor associated with the development of liver cancer, the vaccine was the first against a major form of cancer. [B][U]Vacuum Tube (X-Ray)[/U][/B] William D. Coolidge's name is inseparably linked with the X-ray tube-popularly called the 'Coolidge tube.' This invention completely revolutionized the generation of X-rays and remains to this day the model upon which all X-ray tubes for medical applications are patterned. [B][U]Vitamins[/U][/B] [B]Alloxazines and Isoalloxazinesand Processes for their Production; 2-Sulphanilamido-quinoxaline [/B] Organic chemist Max Tishler developed methods for synthesizing the essential vitamin B2 as well as a poultry disease antibiotic that opened the door to broad expansion of the poultry industry. In 1937 he joined Merck & Company Inc., where his first assignment was to find a new process for the synthesis of riboflavin that would permit economical, large-scale production of the essential vitamin (B2). Later Tishler and his associates synthesized and developed a production process for sulfaquinoxaline, the first effective antibiotic for the prevention and cure of the poultry disease coccidiosis. Its use as a feed additive permitted broad expansion of poultry production.a>. His success, which contributed significantly to human health and nutrition, also led to processes for the practical synthesis of other vitamins. [B]Process for Obtaining Vitamins[/B] Robert R. Williams, Jr., was a telephone company researcher who in his spare time developed ways to synthesize vitamins that helped fight malnutrition and vitamin-deficiency diseases. The vitamin research was conducted in his spare time with the aid of grants and space provided by Columbia University and others. Williams isolated thiamine in crystalline form in 1933 and synthesized vitamin B two years later. Merck & Company began commercial production of thiamine in 1936. Williams' patent, granted in 1942, was a forerunner in the field of chemically reconstructed vitamins. In addition to his interest in curing Oriental deficiency diseases, Williams was instrumental in the enriching flour, cornmeal, and other cereal grains in this country, wiping out the pellagra and riboflavin deficiency common among poor people. Sureshlasi Tuesday, November 13, 2007 02:50 AM [B][U][CENTER][SIZE="5"]Chemistry[/SIZE][/CENTER][/U][/B] [B][U]Aluminum[/U][/B] Charles Martin Hall discovered the electrolytic method of producing aluminum cheaply, bringing the metal into wide commercial use. As a young chemist experimenting in a woodshed, Charles Hall invented a method for extracting pure aluminum from its ore. Understanding aluminum's potential, Hall founded an industry that contributed to many others, particularly the manufacture of aircraft and automobiles. By 1914, Hall's process had brought the cost of aluminum down to 18 cents a pound. Aluminum, once a precious metal used for fine jewelry, is now inexpensive enough for everyday packaging. [B][U]Anti-Leukemia drugs[/U][/B] Gertrude Belle Elion invented the leukemia-fighting drug 6-mercaptopurine and drugs that facilitated kidney transplants. Hired by Burroughs-Wellcome (now Glaxo Wellcome) in 1944, she began work on antagonists of nucleic acid building blocks. This led to the synthesis of 6-mercaptopurine, a drug quickly marketed as Purinethol, and to another antileukemic drug, 6-thioguanine. Her continued research led to Imuran, a derivative of 6-mercaptopurine that was found to block the body's rejection of foreign tissues. In combination with other drugs, Imuran enabled kidney transplants from unrelated donors. Elion and her team were prominent in the development of allopurinol (trade name Zyloprim), for treatment of gout, and of a new antiviral agent, acyclovir (Zovirax), which has been used to battle herpes virus infections. [B][U]Bakelite[/U][/B] Leo Hendrik Baekeland is cited for his research in electric insulation, synthetic resins, and plastics. Using money from his first invention, Velox photographic paper, he established a laboratory, where he synthesized 'Bakelite,' a nonflammable material that was cheaper and more versatile than other known plastics. Bakelite has since been used in everything from engine parts to jewelry to electronics. [B][U]Bromine Extraction[/U][/B] Herbert Henry Dow, founder of the Dow Chemical Company, was one of the creators of the modem American chemical industry. His inventions included such diverse items as electric light carbons, steam and internal combustion engines, automatic furnace controls, and water seals, but most of his inventions were chemical in nature. Most of his chemical patents were for truly "pioneer" inventions. The remainder were practical improvements which took halogen science from theory to reality, creating employment and an environment which encouraged a healthy combination of basic and applied research. The combined effect of his inventions was to improve the quality of life for millions of people around the world. [B][U]Carborundum[/U][/B] Edward Acheson's discovery of carborundum, a highly effective abrasive used in manufacturing, was an important influence in advancing the industrial era. In the mid 1890s, Acheson discovered that overheating carborundum produced almost pure graphite. This graphite was another major discovery for him, and it became extremely valuable and helpful as a lubricant. In 1926, the U.S. Patent Office named carborundum as one of the 22 patents most responsible for the industrial age. Not long after that, it was noted that without carborundum, the mass production manufacturing of precision-ground, interchangeable metal parts would be practically impossible. [B][U]Cortisone[/U][/B] [B]Preparation of Cortisone[/B] Percy Lavon Julian Born Apr 11 1899 - Died Apr 19 1975 Preparation of Cortisone Patent Number(s) 2,752,339 Inducted 1990 Percy Lavon Julian synthesized physostigmine for treatment of glaucoma and cortisone for the treatment of rheumatoid arthritis. His synthesis of cortisone reduced the price of cortisone from hundreds of dollars per drop for natural cortisone to a few cents per gram. [B]Process of Treating Pregnene Compounds[/B] Chemist Lewis Hastings Sarett prepared a synthetic version of the hormone cortisone, which was soon demonstrated as an effective treatment against rheumatoid arthritis. Sarett prepared the first synthetic cortisone in 1944, when Merck & Co. was a participant in a government effort to improve military medicine. Four years later the Mayo Clinic demonstrated the efficacy of the product against rheumatoid arthritis. In 1949, Sarett and several collaborators initiated an alternative synthesis commencing with raw materials derivable from coal, air, lime, and water. This led to the first route independent of naturally occurring starting materials. [B][U]Dynamite[/U][/B] Alfred Nobel, the inventor of dynamite, was also a great industrialist. In 1863, Nobel developed the Nobel patent detonator, which detonated nitroglycerin using a strong shock rather than heat. In 1865, the Nobel Company built the first factory for producing nitroglycerin. This led to the establishment of many factories around the world. Nitroglycerin in its fluid state is very volatile. Nobel recognized this, and eventually patented dynamite, a combination of nitroglycerin absorbed by a porous substance. This gave him an easily handled, solid yet malleable explosive. Mining, railroad building, and other construction became safer, more efficient, and cheaper. [B][U]HDPE and Polypropylene Plastics[/U][/B] Robert Banks and fellow research chemist Paul Hogan were working for Phillips Petroleum in 1951 when they invented crystalline polypropylene and high-density polyethylene (HDPE). Together, the plastics were marketed under the brand name Marlex�, which has since made its way into every corner of American life. Banks and Hogan began working together in 1946. Low-density polyethylene already existed, but manufacturing it required extremely high pressures. While working on another project to improve yields of high-octane gasoline--the two chemists discovered crystalline polypropylene. They experimented further and found they were able to produce HDPE in a low pressure situation. Their discoveries launched a multi-billion dollar industry. Today, over 55 billion pounds of HDPE are manufactured each year. Plastic products include gallon milk jugs, laundry baskets, indoor-outdoor carpeting, and artificial turf. [B][U]Isothiocyanate Compounds (Antigen)[/U][/B] [B]Isothiocyanate Compounds and Means of Producing the Same[/B] Antibodies are the body's protectors. When antigens, such as bacteria or viruses, enter the body, antibodies from a previous infection or vaccine combine with them and deactivate the invaders. During the 1950s, as medical researchers came to understand this relationship, it became a priority to identify antigens. Joseph Burckhalter and Robert Seiwald made an essential contribution to the identification of antigens through the synthesis of fluorescein isothiocyanate, better known as FITC. The first practical and first patented antibody labeling agent, the stable, yellow-green-fluorescent compound has become widely used for rapid, accurate, and economic diagnosis of infectious diseases. FITC has played an important role in identifying the cause of AIDS and can be used to distinguish between different strains of streptococci. It has proved infallible in tests for syphilis. FITC and red RITC (rhodamine isothiocyanate) are used together to quickly diagnose leukemia and lymphoma. FITC also paved the way for the development of other labeling procedures, such as radioimmunoassay and enzyme-linked immosorbent assay (ELISA). [B][U]Kevlar[/U][/B] Kwolek's earliest work pioneered low-temperature processes for the preparation of condensation polymers and resulted in hundreds of new polymers, including Kapton polyimide film, and Nomex aramid polymer and fiber. As she carried out experiments to make stronger and stiffer fibers, she discovered an amazing branch of polymer science-liquid crystalline polymers. Thousands of police can attest to the value of Stephanie Kwolek's breakthrough research in para-aramid fibers. The fruits of her inventiveness can be found in mooring ropes, fiber-optic cables, aircraft parts, canoes, and-most important to police-in lightweight bullet-resistant vests. [B][U]Nystatin (Antifungal / Antibiotic)[/U][/B] The world's first useful antifungal antibiotic, nystatin, was developed through a long-distance scientific collaboration. Working as researchers for the New York State Department of Health, Rachel Fuller Brown in Albany and Elizabeth Lee Hazen in New York City shared tests and samples through the U.S. mail. To Hazen's single-minded pursuit of an antifungal antibiotic, Brown added the skills needed to identify, characterize, and purify the various substances produced by culturing bacteria found in hundreds of soil samples. The antibiotic they developed, named 'nystatin' for the New York State Department of Health, was first introduced in practical form in 1954 following Food and Drug Administration approval. Not only did it cure many disfiguring and disabling fungal infections of the skin, mouth, throat, and intestinal tract, but it could be combined with antibacterial drugs to balance their effects. Uses for nystatin have been as varied as treating Dutch elm disease to rescuing water-damaged works of art from molds. [B][U]Oral Contraceptives[/U][/B] Frank B. Colton developed Enovid, the first oral contraceptive. Colton has made many important contributions to medicinal organic chemistry and particularly to steroid chemistry. His pioneering research on the relationship between structure and biological activity, particularly of 19-nor steroids, led to the development of Nilevar, the first orally active anabolic agent which had a distinct separation between protein building and masculinizing properties. Of even greater importance was his research which resulted in the discovery of Enovid. The introduction of this substance in 1960 for family planning purposes ushered in the era of oral contraception. [B][U]Pasteurization[/U][/B] French chemist Louis Pasteur was the founder of microbiological sciences. Pasteur's studies of fermentation began in Lille when he was approached by an industrialist disturbed because undesirable products often appeared during the fermentation of sugar into alcohol by yeast. Pasteur postulated that these products came from microscopic organisms other than yeast and suggested that each particular type of fermentation was the effect of a specific microorganism, called the germ. He soon illustrated this revolutionary theory with brilliant studies on the conversion of sugar. Pasteur claimed that types of microbes could be separated from each other by proper techniques, and could be shown to differ in nutritional requirements and in their susceptibility to antiseptics. He also suggested that just as each type of fermentation was caused by a particular type of germ, so it was with many types of diseases. Pasteur became preoccupied with the origin of microorganisms and demonstrated that each microbe is derived from a pre-existing microbe, and that spontaneous generation does not occur. Spoilage of perishable products could be prevented by destroying the microbes already present in these products and by protecting the sterilized material against subsequent contamination. Pasteur applied this theory to the preservation of beverages and foodstuffs, introducing the technique of heat treatment now known as pasteurization. [B][U]Peanut Products[/U][/B] Agricultural chemist George Washington Carver developed crop-rotation methods for conserving nutrients in soil and discovered hundreds of new uses for crops such as the peanut, which created new markets for farmers, especially in the South. At Tuskegee, Carver developed his crop rotation method, which alternated nitrate producing legumes-such as peanuts and peas-with cotton, which depletes soil of its nutrients. Following Carver's lead, southern farmers soon began planting peanuts one year and cotton the next. While many of the peanuts were used to feed livestock, large surpluses quickly developed. Carver then developed 325 different uses for the extra peanuts-from cooking oil to printers ink. When he discovered that the sweet potato and the pecan also enriched depleted soils, Carver found almost 20 uses for these crops, including synthetic rubber and material for paving highways. [B][U]Pentothal / Anesthesia[/U][/B] Ernest H. Volwiler and Donalee L. Tabern discovered the general anesthetic Pentothal, one of the most important agents in modern medicine. Volwiler and Tabern discovered Pentothal in 1936 when they were seeking a substance which could be injected directly into the blood stream to produce unconsciousness. For three years the two men screened over 200 compounds, eventually arriving at a sulfur-bearing analogue of Nembutal. Induction was smooth, pleasant, free of muscle twitching, and notably lacking in delirium or frightening psychic effects. It could be used for minor procedures requiring anesthesia or for more prolonged procedures, being administered before ether. As a result of his efforts, Abbott in 1948 became the first pharmaceutical company to supply radio pharmaceuticals to medical and research institutions. The uses of Pentothal are legend. Few agents in medicine have played such an outstanding role in improving the well-being of generations of patients. [B][U]pH Meter[/U][/B] Arnold O. Beckman invented a pH meter for measuring acidity and alkalinity and the quartz spectrophotometer, an instrument which pioneered automatic chemical analysis. [B][U]Polymerase Chain Reacton[/U][/B] The polymerase chain reaction, which was devised by Kary Mullis, has revolutionized DNA technology. PCR amplifies specific DNA sequences from very small amounts of complex genetic material. The amplification produces an almost unlimited number of highly purified DNA molecules suitable for analysis or manipulation. PCR has allowed screening for genetic and infectious diseases. Analysis of DNAs from different populations, including DNA from extinct species, has allowed the reconstruction of phylogenetic trees including primates and humans. PCR is essential to forensics and paternity testing. It has had a major impact on molecular biology, medicine, forensics, molecular paleontology, and many related fields. [B][U]Polyurethane[/U][/B] [B]Process for Making Polymeric Products and for Modifying Polymeric Products[/B] William Edward Hanford and Donald Fletcher Holmes invented the process for making the multipurpose material polyurethane.They teamed up at E.I. du Pont de Nemours & Company, receiving their polyurethane patent in 1942. The process they developed reacts polyols and related hydroxy compounds with di-isocyanates. This method is the basis today for the manufacture of all polyurethanes. Flexible polyurethane foam is used as an upholstery material, and the rigid foam is commonly used as a heat-insulating material in homes, offices, and refrigerators. Polyurethane is also used in life-saving artificial hearts, safety padding in modern automobiles, and in carpeting. [B][U]Polyvinyl Chloride (PVC)[/U][/B] In 1926 Waldo Semon, newly employed in the research department at The BFGoodrich Company in Akron, Ohio, decided to pursue a dubious project. Instead of digging into his assigned work, he began trying to dissolve an undesirable material called polyvinyl chloride (PVC) to create an adhesive for bonding rubber to metal. 'People then thought of PVC as worthless back then,' Semon recalled. 'They'd throw it in the trash.' Semon never succeeded in creating the adhesive, but by heating PVC in a solvent at a high boiling point he discovered a substance that was both flexible and elastic. At first no one literally knew what to make of Semon's newfangled substance, but decades later PVC has become the world's second-best-selling plastic, generating billions of dollars in sales each year. [B][U]Scotchgard (TM) Textile Proctector[/U][/B] Chemist Patsy Sherman and colleague Sam Smith were working at 3M Company when they created Scotchgard�. Scotchgard went on to become one of the most widely used and valuable products in stain repellency and soil removal, eventually bringing in over $300 million annually for 3M. Sherman and Smith teamed up to develop the line of Scotchgard products after an accidental spill of a fluorochemical rubber intended for jet fuel hoses showed resistance to water and oily liquids. After the introduction in 1956 of a stain repellent treatment for wool, they later developed products designed for clothing, household linens, upholstery, and carpeting. Their research culminated in the late 1960s when they developed a product that both repelled stains and also permitted the removal of oily soils from synthetic fabrics, including the newly popular permanent press fabrics. Sherman and Smith jointly hold 13 patents in fluorochemical polymers and polymerization processes. [B][U]Synthetic Rubber[/U][/B] [B]Diamine-Dicarboxylic Acid Salts and Process of Preparing Same; Synthetic Fiber [/B] Wallace Hume Carothers, who has been called one of the most brilliant organic chemists ever employed by E.I. du Pont de Nemours & Company, spent only nine years at Du Pont before his death. But in that time he made contributions to the theory of organic chemistry that led to the invention of polymeric materials such as the synthetic materials nylon and neoprene, the first commercially successful synthetic rubber. During his brief period at Du Pont, Carothers first worked on the polymerization of acetylene and its derivatives; this led to the development by other scientists of neoprene. His most outstanding work involved the theory of linear polymerization, which he tested by synthesizing a large number of polymers structurally similar to cellulose and silk. This work culminated in the production of nylon, which is today used in a wide variety of applications including apparel, carpeting, home furnishings, and industrial products. The invention of nylon marked the beginning of a new era of synthetic fibers which is still expanding. [B]Vinyl Derivatives of Acetylene and Method of Preparing the Same [/B] Rev. Julius Nieuwland, C.S.C., was the inventor of the first synthetic rubber, neoprene, manufactured by the DuPont Company. His work with acetylene also led him into a collaboration with scientists from DuPont. Working with them, he found that if monovinylacetylene were treated with hydrogen chloride and the resulting chloroprene polymerized, neoprene would result. Eventually, neoprene was put on the market in 1932 by DuPont under the brand name Duprene. Neoprene was considered superior to rubber in many ways such as in its resistance to sunlight, abrasion, and temperature extremes. These properties made it popular in many industries. For instance, neoprene is favored for electrical cable insulation, telephone house-to-house wiring, many moulded, extruded, and sheet products, rug backings, and roofing. [B][U]Teflon[/U][/B] Chemist Roy J. Plunkett discovered tetrafluoroethylene resin while researching refrigerants at DuPont. Known by its trade name, Teflon, Plunkett's discovery was found to be extremely heat-tolerant and stick-resistant. After ten years of research, Teflon was introduced in 1949. Teflon has become an important coating for everything from satellite components to cookware. [B][U]Tetracycline[/U][/B] Lloyd H. Conover invented the antibiotic tetracycline, which became the most prescribed broad spectrum antibiotic in the United States within three years and remains the drug of choice for a number of serious bacterial infections. Tetracycline was the first therapeutically superior drug to be made by chemical alteration of an antibiotic produced by microbial metabolism. It sparked a wide-scale search for superior structurally modified antibiotics, which has provided most of the important antibiotic discoveries made since then. [B][U]Titanium[/U][/B] In 1932, Luxembourg native William Kroll invented a process to produce metallic titanium. He combined titanium tetrachloride with calcium to produce ductile titanium. By 1938, Kroll had produced 50 pounds of titanium using his process, later named the "Kroll Process". Titanium in its pure form had been discovered by William Gregor in 1791, but it was difficult to obtain from its natural state and, when heated, it yielded a useless substance. Titanium is the fourth most abundant structural metal on Earth and today remains vital in the production of jet engines and piping systems. It is also used in artificial hips and knees and is a key ingredient in golf clubs, watches and marine equpment. [B][U]Transparent Silica[/U][/B] A periodic chart that Franklin Hyde once designed had the element silicon placed directly in the center - not surprising, since Hyde�s work with glass-related technology and his role in launching the silicone industry all derive from silicon. Silicone fluids resist decomposition from heat and water, so they are used often as lubricants, hydraulic fluids and water repellents. Hyde worked extensively on silicone rubbers, which are extremely resistant to aging, sunlight, moisture, temperature extremes and many chemicals. They are used often as caulks, gaskets, electrical insulators, O-rings and heat-resistant seals. Hyde�s ultra-pure glass has many uses, including spacecraft windows, telescopes, and precision lenses for manufacturing equipment. It also provided the bases for the semiconductor and fiber optics industries. Hyde also discovered how to convert silicon-containing compounds into silicones. Now, almost all major industries rely on the silicone industry to supply a wide range of important materials. [B][U]Vulcanization of Rubber[/U][/B] Natural or India rubber, as it was then known, was of limited usefulness to industry. Rubber products melted in hot weather, froze and cracked in cold, and adhered to virtually everything until the day in the mid-19th century when inventor Charles Goodyear accidentally dropped some rubber mixed with sulfur on a hot stove. Goodyear's discovery of what came to be known as vulcanization strengthened rubber so it could be applied to a vast variety of industrial uses, including, eventually, automobile tires. Sureshlasi Saturday, November 17, 2007 07:59 PM [B][U][CENTER][SIZE="5"]Industrial[/SIZE][/CENTER][/U][/B] [B][U]Air Conditioner[/U][/B] American engineer and inventor Willis Haviland Carrier developed the formulae and equipment that made air conditioning possible. The world's first spray type air conditioning equipment was Carrier's 'Apparatus for Treating Air,' which he correctly predicted would be used to enhance comfort as well as improve industrial processes and products. In 1911 Carrier disclosed his basic 'Rational Psychrometric Formulae' to the American Society of Mechanical Engineers. The formulae still stand as the basis for all fundamental calculations in the air conditioning industry. His development of the first safe, low pressure centrifugal refrigeration machine using nontoxic, nonflammable refrigerant marked the beginning of the era of comfort cooling. Carrier's early work in developing centrifugal refrigeration machines led to new safe refrigerants for which he also received several patents. By controlling humidity as well as temperature, he invented air conditioning as we know it today. [B][U]Automatic Engine Lubricator[/U][/B] Elijah McCoy received his first patent for an automatic lubricating device in 1872. Previously, engines had to be stopped before necessary lubrication could be applied. McCoy's invention allowed engines to be lubricated while they ran, saving precious time and money. [B][U]Automobile[/U][/B] [B]Transmission Mechanism[/B] Pioneering automotive engineer Henry Ford held many patents on automotive mechanisms. He is best remembered, however, for helping devise the factory assembly approach to production that revolutionized the auto industry by greatly reducing the time required to assemble a car. [B]Engine Starting Device; Engine Starting, Lighting and Ignition System[/B] Charles Franklin Kettering invented the first electrical ignition system and the self-starter for automobile engines and the first practical engine-driven generator. [B][U]Bromine Extraction[/U][/B] Herbert Henry Dow, founder of the Dow Chemical Company, was one of the creators of the modem American chemical industry. His inventions included such diverse items as electric light carbons, steam and internal combustion engines, automatic furnace controls, and water seals, but most of his inventions were chemical in nature. Most of his chemical patents were for truly "pioneer" inventions. The remainder were practical improvements which took halogen science from theory to reality, creating employment and an environment which encouraged a healthy combination of basic and applied research. The combined effect of his inventions was to improve the quality of life for millions of people around the world. [B][U]Dynamite[/U][/B] Alfred Nobel, the inventor of dynamite, was also a great industrialist. In 1863, Nobel developed the Nobel patent detonator, which detonated nitroglycerin using a strong shock rather than heat. In 1865, the Nobel Company built the first factory for producing nitroglycerin. This led to the establishment of many factories around the world. Nitroglycerin in its fluid state is very volatile. Nobel recognized this, and eventually patented dynamite, a combination of nitroglycerin absorbed by a porous substance. This gave him an easily handled, solid yet malleable explosive. Mining, railroad building, and other construction became safer, more efficient, and cheaper. [B][U]Electrostatic Precipitator[/U][/B] As industrial smokestacks became a common sight at the turn of the century, Frederick Cottrell realized that pollution might be controlled and that valuable raw materials were vanishing into the atmosphere with the unwanted gases. In 1907 he applied for a patent for a device that passed high-voltage direct current to a discharge electrode which leaked the charge onto particles passing by in the fumes. These charged particles were then electrically attracted to an electrode with an opposite charge, where they could be collected and retrieved as valuable minerals or chemical compounds. Cottrell's electrostatic precipitator, which became known simply as a 'Cottrell,' removed from 90 to 98 percent of all particles from escaping smoke and gases. The term 'cottrell' can still be found in the unabridged dictionary. [B][U]Magnetron[/U][/B] [B]Asymmetrically Conductive Device and Method of Making the Same [/B] Robert Hall invented the version of the magnetron that operates most microwave ovens, the semiconductor laser found in compact disk players, and power rectifiers that greatly improved power transmission efficiency. His basic rectifier structure, with silicon replacing the germanium, is used today for AC-to-DC power conversion in electric locomotives and high-voltage DC electrical transmission. In 1962 Hall invented the semiconductor injection laser, a device now used in all compact disk players and laser printers, and most optical fiber communications systems. [B]High Efficiency Magnetron[/B] Percy Spencer, while working for the Raytheon Company, discovered a more efficient way to manufacture magnetrons. In 1941, magnetrons were being produced at a rate of 17 per day. Spencer set out to create a simpler magnetron that could be mass produced. The result was a magnetron that replaced precision copper bars with lamina and replaced soldered internal wires with a simple solid ring. These improvements and others allowed for the faster production of 2,600 magnetrons per day. In 1945, Spencer created a device to cook food using microwave radiation. Raytheon saw the possibilities of this, and after acquiring Amana Refrigeration in 1965, was able to sell microwave ovens on a large scale. The first microwave oven was called the Radarange, and today, there are over 200 million in use throughout the world. [B][U]Numerical Control[/U][/B] John Parsons changed the control of machines and industrial processes from an imprecise craft to an exact science, spawning a second industrial revolution. He brought computers to aircraft design, manufacturing, and real-time management reporting. He developed Numerical Control-produced evaporative patterns to replace weldments with streamlined castings, which revolutionized the production of automobile body dies. [B][U]Polyvinyl Chloride (PVC)[/U][/B] In 1926 Waldo Semon, newly employed in the research department at The BFGoodrich Company in Akron, Ohio, decided to pursue a dubious project. Instead of digging into his assigned work, he began trying to dissolve an undesirable material called polyvinyl chloride (PVC) to create an adhesive for bonding rubber to metal. 'People then thought of PVC as worthless back then,' Semon recalled. 'They'd throw it in the trash.' Semon never succeeded in creating the adhesive, but by heating PVC in a solvent at a high boiling point he discovered a substance that was both flexible and elastic. At first no one literally knew what to make of Semon's newfangled substance, but decades later PVC has become the world's second-best-selling plastic, generating billions of dollars in sales each year. [B][U]Punch Card Tabulator[/U][/B] Herman Hollerith invented and developed a punch-card tabulation machine system that revolutionized statistical computation. Hollerith began working on the tabulating system during his days at MIT, filing for the first patent in 1884. He developed a hand-fed 'press' that sensed the holes in punched cards; a wire would pass through the holes into a cup of mercury beneath the card closing the electrical circuit. This process triggered mechanical counters and sorter bins and tabulated the appropriate data. Hollerith's system-including punch, tabulator, and sorter-allowed the official 1890 population count to be tallied in six months, and in another two years all the census data was completed and defined; the cost was $5 million below the forecasts and saved more than two years' time. His later machines mechanized the card-feeding process, added numbers, and sorted cards, in addition to merely counting data. In 1896 Hollerith founded the Tabulating Machine Company, forerunner of Computer Tabulating Recording Company (CTR). He served as a consulting engineer with CTR until retiring in 1921. In 1924 CTR changed its name to IBM - the International Business Machines Corporation. [B][U]Steam Generator[/U][/B] George H. Babcock and Stephen Wilcox invented an improved water tube steamboiler, which provided a safer and more efficient production of steam. [B][U]Tapered Roller Bearings[/U][/B] Henry Timken invented the Timken® tapered roller bearing. He found that conventional bearings of the 19th century worked well at reducing friction, but ran into problems when the wheels had to bear heavy loads from the sides, as when vehicles turn. So, in 1895, with the help of his two sons and a nephew, he began experiments to make a better bearing. He developed Timken tapered roller bearings to bear the heavy side loads. In the 1920s, The Timken Company was making 90 percent of the country's bearings. By the early 1990s, they supplied nearly a third of the world's tapered roller bearings. Sureshlasi Tuesday, November 20, 2007 02:06 AM [B][U][CENTER][SIZE="5"]Nobel Prizes[/SIZE][/CENTER][/U][/B] The Nobel prizes are awarded under the will of Alfred Bernhard Nobel, Swedish chemist and engineer, who died in 1896. The interest of the fund is divided annually among the persons who have made the most outstanding contributions in the fields of physics, chemistry, and physiology or medicine, who have produced the most distinguished literary work of an idealist tendency, and who have contributed most toward world peace. In 1968, a Nobel Prize of economic sciences was established by Riksbank, the Swedish bank, in celebration of its 300th anniversary. The prize was awarded for the first time in 1969. The prizes for physics and chemistry are awarded by the Swedish Academy of Science in Stockholm, the one for physiology or medicine by the Caroline Medical Institute in Stockholm, that for literature by the Academy in Stockholm, and that for peace by a committee of five elected by the Norwegian Storting. The distribution of prizes was begun on December 10, 1901, the anniversary of Nobel's death. The amount of each prize varies with the income from the fund and in 2007 is worth ten million Swedish kroners, or more than one and a half million U.S. dollars. No Nobel prizes were awarded for 1940, 1941, and 1942; prizes for literature were not awarded for 1914, 1918, and 1943. [B][U][SIZE="3"]2007 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Physics:[/B] Albert Fert (France) and Peter Gr�nberg (Germany) for "the discovery of giant magnetoresistance," the technology used to read data on hard disks [B]Medicine:[/B] Mario R. Capecchi (U.S.), Sir Martin J. Evans (U.K.), and Oliver Smithies (U.S.) for "their discoveries of principles for introducing specific gene modifications in mice by the use of embryonic stem cells" Chemistry: Gerhard Ertl (Germany) for "his studies of chemical processes on solid surfaces" [B]Literature:[/B] Doris Lessing (U.K.) "that epicist of the female experience, who with skepticism, fire and visionary power has subjected a divided civilization to scrutiny" [B]Peace:[/B] Al Gore (U.S.) and the United Nations' Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (Switzerland) for "their efforts to build up and disseminate greater knowledge about man-made climate change, and to lay the foundations for the measures that are needed to counteract such change" Economics: Leonid Hurwicz (U.S.), Eric S. Maskin (U.S.), and Roger B. Myerson (U.S.) "for having laid the foundations of mechanism design theory" [B][U][SIZE="3"]2006 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace:[/B] Muhammad Yunus (Bangladesh) and the Grameen Bank of Bangladesh for �their efforts to create economic and social development from below� [B]Literature:[/B] Orhan Pamuk (Turkey) �who in the quest for the melancholic soul of his native city has discovered new symbols for the clash and interlacing of cultures� [B]Physics: [/B]John C. Mather and George F. Smoot (both U.S.) for �their discovery of the blackbody form and anisotropy of the cosmic microwave background radiation� [B]Chemistry:[/B] Roger D. Kornberg (U.S.) for �his studies of the molecular basis of eukaryotic transcription� [B]Physiology or Medicine:[/B] Andrew Z. Fire and Craig C. Mello (both U.S.) for �their discovery of RNA interference - gene silencing by double-stranded RNA� [B]Economics:[/B] Edmund S. Phelps (U.S.) for �his analysis of intertemporal tradeoffs in macroeconomic policy� [B][U][SIZE="3"]2005 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace:[/B] Mohamed ElBaradei (Egypt) and International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA) for �their efforts to prevent nuclear energy from being used for military purposes and to ensure that nuclear energy for peaceful purposes is used in the safest possible way� [B]Literature:[/B] Harold Pinter (United Kingdom) �who in his plays uncovers the precipice under everyday prattle and forces entry into oppression's closed rooms� [B]Physics:[/B] Roy J. Glauber (U.S.) for �his contribution to the quantum theory of optical coherence,� and John L. Hall (U.S.) and Theodor W. H�nsch (Germany) for �their contributions to the development of laser-based precision spectroscopy, including the optical frequency comb technique� Chemistry: Yves Chauvin (France), Robert H. Grubbs (U.S.), and Richard R. Schrock (U.S.) for �the development of the metathesis method in organic synthesis� [B]Physiology or Medicine:[/B] Barry J. Marshall and J. Robin Warren (both Australia) for their discovery that the bacterium Helicobacter pylori causes gastritis and peptic ulcer disease [B]Economics:[/B] Robert J. Aumann (U.S.) and Thomas C. Schelling (U.S.) for �having enhanced our understanding of conflict and cooperation through game-theory analysis� Sureshlasi Tuesday, November 20, 2007 08:31 PM [B][U][SIZE="3"]2004 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace:[/B] Wangari Maathai (Kenya) �for her contribution to sustainable development, democracy and peace� [B]Literature:[/B] Elfriede Jelinek (Austria) �for her musical flow of voices and counter-voices in novels and plays that with extraordinary linguistic zeal reveal the absurdity of society's clich�s and their subjugating power� [B]Physics: [/B]David J. Gross, H. David Politzer, and Frank Wilczek (all U.S.) �for the discovery of asymptotic freedom in the theory of the strong interaction.� [B]Chemistry:[/B] Aaron Ciechanover (Israel), Avram Hershko (Israel), and Irwin Rose (U.S.) �for the discovery of ubiquitin-mediated protein degradation.� [B]Physiology or Medicine:[/B] Richard Axel and Linda Buck (both U.S.) �for their discoveries of odorant receptors and the organization of the olfactory system.� [B]Economics:[/B] Finn E. Kydland (Norway) and Edward C. Prescott (U.S.) �for their contributions to dynamic macroeconomics: the time consistency of economic policy and the driving forces behind business cycles.� [B][U][SIZE="3"]2003 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace:[/B] Shirin Ebadi (Iran), for her work as a human rights activist and lawyer. [B]Literature:[/B] J. M. Coetzee (South Africa). [B]Physics: [/B]Alexei A. Abrikosov (Russia, U.S.), Anthony J. Leggett (UK, U.S.), and Vitaly L. Ginzburg (Russia), for theories about superconductivity. [B]Chemistry:[/B] Peter Agre and Roderick MacKinnon (both U.S.) for studies on channels in cell walls. [B]Medicine:[/B] Paul C. Lauterbur (U.S.) and Sir Peter Mansfield (UK) for discoveries leading to magnetic resonance imaging (MRI). [B]Economics: [/B]Robert F. Engle (U.S.) and Clive W. J. Granger (UK), for developing statistical tools to improve analysis of stock prices and other data. [B][U][SIZE="3"]2002 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace: [/B]Jimmy Carter, former president of the United States, was cited for �his decades of untiring effort to find peaceful solutions to international conflicts, to advance democracy and human rights, and to promote economic and social development.� [B]Literature: [/B]Imre Kert�sz (Hungary) for �writing that upholds the fragile experience of the individual against the barbaric arbitrariness of history.� Kert�sz often draws on his experiences as a prisoner in Auschwitz in his works, which explore �the possibility of continuing to live and think as an individual in an era in which the subjection of human beings to social forces has become increasingly complete.� [B]Physics:[/B] One-half jointly to Raymond Davis, Jr. (U.S.) and Masatoshi Koshiba (Japan) for �pioneering contributions to astrophysics, in particular for the detection of cosmic neutrinos,� and one-half to Riccardo Giacconi (U.S.) for �pioneering contributions to astrophysics, which have led to the discovery of cosmic X-ray sources.� The laureates have used cosmic particles, the smallest components of the universe, to �increase our understanding of the very largest: the Sun, stars, galaxies, and supernovae.� [B]Chemistry:[/B] One-half jointly to John B. Fenn (U.S.) and Koichi Tanaka (Japan) for �their development of soft desorption ionization methods for mass spectrometric analyses of biological macromolecules,� and one-half to Kurt W�thrich (Switzerland) for �his development of nuclear magnetic resonance spectroscopy for determining the three-dimensional structure of biological macromolecules in solution.� The work of the laureates has helped researchers to quickly determine the composition of biological macromolecules, such as proteins, and understand their function in the cell. �The methods have revolutionized the development of new pharmaceuticals.� [B]Medicine:[/B] Sydney Brenner (UK), H. Robert Horvitz (U.S.), and John E. Sulston (UK) for �their discoveries concerning genetic regulation of organ development and programmed cell death.� The laureates have �have identified key genes regulating organ development and programmed cell death and have shown that corresponding genes exist in higher species, including man.� [B]Economics:[/B] Daniel Kahneman (U.S.) for �having integrated insights from psychological research into economic science, especially concerning human judgment and decision-making under uncertainty,� and Vernon L. Smith (U.S.) for �having established laboratory experiments as a tool in empirical economic analysis, especially in the study of alternative market mechanisms.� [B][U][SIZE="3"]2001 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace:[/B] United Nations and Kofi Annan, secretary-general of the UN, were cited �for their work for a better organized and more peaceful world.� [B]Literature: [/B]Sir V. S. Naipaul (UK) �for having united perceptive narrative and incorruptible scrutiny in works that compel us to see the presence of suppressed histories.� Naipaul explores alienation and the hardships of postcolonial countries in his works of fiction, nonfiction, and the occasional blend of the two. [B]Physics:[/B] Wolfgang Ketterle (Germany), Eric A. Cornell, and Carl E. Wieman (both U.S.) �for the achievement of Bose-Einstein condensation in dilute gases of alkali atoms, and for early fundamental studies of the properties of the condensates.� In discovering the Bose-Einstein condensate, a new state of matter, the laureates have explained �the secrets of the microworld of quantum physics.� [B]Chemistry:[/B] One-half jointly to William S. Knowles (U.S.) and Ryoji Noyori (Japan) �for their work on chirally catalyzed hydrogenation reactions,� and one-half to K. Barry Sharpless (U.S.) �for his work on chirally catalyzed oxidation reactions.� They �have opened up a new field of research in which it is possible to synthesize molecules and material with new properties.� Medicine: Leland H. Hartwell (U.S.), R. Timothy Hunt, and Paul M. Nurse (both UK) for their discoveries of �key regulators of the cell cycle.� Their discoveries concerning control of the cell cycle �may in the long term open new possibilities for cancer treatment.� [B]Economics:[/B] George A. Akerlof, A. Michael Spence, and Joseph E. Stiglitz (all U.S.) for �their analyses of markets with asymmetric information.� �The laureates' contributions form the core of modern information economics.� Sureshlasi Thursday, November 22, 2007 03:01 AM [B][U][SIZE="3"]2000 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace:[/B] Kim Dae Jung, president of South Korea, was cited �for his work for democracy and human rights in South Korea and in East Asia in general, and for peace and reconciliation with North Korea in particular.� [B]Literature:[/B] Gao Xingjian (China) �for an oeuvre of universal validity, bitter insights, and linguistic ingenuity, which has opened new paths for the Chinese novel and drama.� His first novel, Soul Mountain, recounts impressions from journeys in remote districts in China, and his second, One Man's Bible, draws on his experiences as a political activist during China's Cultural Revolution. [B]Physics:[/B] One-half jointly to Zhores I. Alferov (Russia) and Herbert Kroemer (U.S.) �for developing semiconductor heterostructures used in high-speed- and opto-electronics,� and one-half to Jack S. Kilby (U.S.) �for his part in the invention of the integrated circuit.� Alferov and Kroemer's inventions led to the development of fast transistors, which are used in radio link satellites and mobile telephone base stations. Kilby contributed to the development of the microchip, the basis of all modern technology. [B]Chemistry:[/B] Alan J. Heeger, Alan G. MacDiarmid (both U.S.), and Hideki Shirakawa (Japan) �for the discovery and development of conductive polymers.� Conductive polymers are plastics that can conduct electric current. They are used in antistatic substances for photographic film and in shields for computer screens against electromagnetic radiation. [B]Medicine:[/B] Arvid Carlsson (Sweden), Paul Greengard, and Eric Kandel (both U.S.) �for their discoveries concerning signal transduction in the nervous system.� Their findings have led to the development of new drugs to treat neurological and psychiatric diseases. [B]Economics:[/B] James J. Heckman and Daniel L. McFadden (U.S.). �To James Heckman for his development of theory and methods for analyzing selective samples and to Daniel McFadden for his development of theory and methods for analyzing discrete choice.� The laureates have developed methods that are widely used in the statistical analysis of individual and household behavior within the social sciences. [B][U][SIZE="3"]1999 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace:[/B] Doctors Without Borders, a French-based global organization. Since 1971 it has provided emergency medical assistance to populations plagued by violence and brutality in more than 80 countries. Said the Nobel Committee, �Each fearless and self-sacrificing helper shows each victim a human face, stands for respect for that person's dignity and is a source of hope for peace and reconciliation.� [B]Literature:[/B] G�nter Grass (Germany), �whose frolicsome black fables portray the forgotten face of history.� Grass, whose novel The Tin Drum (1961) brought him world renown, writes fiercely and eloquently about the anguish of war and reunification in his native Germany. [B]Physics:[/B] Gerardus 't Hooft (Netherlands) and Martinus J. G. Veltman (Netherlands). According to the Academy, the two researchers have �placed particle physics theory on a firmer mathematical foundation.� The researchers' theory links electromagnetic and �weak� interactions�the process which produces nearly all of the sun's energy. [B]Chemistry:[/B] Ahmed H. Zewail (Egypt and U.S.) who has created the world's fastest camera, which captures atoms in motion much as a slow-motion replay captures a sporting event. The academy stated that his contributions �have brought about a revolution in chemistry and adjacent sciences.� [B]Medicine:[/B] Dr. G�nter Blobel (Germany and U.S.), who was honored by the Academy �for the discovery that proteins have intrinsic signals that govern their transport and localization in the cell.� [B]Economics:[/B] Robert A. Mundel (U.S.), a Columbia University economist, for his work on monetary dynamics and optimum currency areas. The Academy stated Mundel �has established the foundation for the theory that dominates practical policy considerations of monetary and fiscal policy in open economies.� [B][U][SIZE="3"]1998 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace: [/B]John Hume and David Trimble (both Northern Ireland), whose efforts made possible Northern Ireland's Good Friday peace accord in 1998 and have led to political progress in a deep-rooted conflict. Hume is the leader of the Catholic Social Democratic and Labor Party, and Trimble heads the predominant Protestant Ulster Unionist Party. [B]Literature:[/B] Jos� Saramago (Portugal), who, according to the committee, �with parables sustained by imagination, compassion, and irony, continually enables us once again to apprehend an elusory reality.� The first Portuguese writer to win the Nobel, his novels have been translated into more than 20 languages. [B]Physics:[/B]Robert B. Laughlin (U.S.), Horst L. St�rmer (Germany), and Daniel C. Tsui (U.S.), �for their discovery of a new form of quantum fluid with fractionally charged excitations.� The findings of the three scientists will have implications on our understanding of the destruction of Earth's ozone layer. [B]Chemistry:[/B] Walter Kohn (U.S.) and John A. Pople (U.K.) for their developments in the study of the properties of molecules and the chemical processes in which they are involved. Kohn's density-functional theory simplifies the mathematical explanation of the bonding between atoms within molecules, making it possible for scientists to study large, complex molecules. Pople was cited for his development of computer techniques that make it possible to create models of chemical reactions that cannot otherwise be recreated in the laboratory. [B]Medicine: [/B]Robert F. Furchgott, Louis J. Ignarro, and Ferid Murad (all U.S.) for discovering that nitric oxide acts as a signal in the cardiovascular system. Their findings are relevant to the function of the recently popular anti-impotence drug Viagra, and will also have implications for the treatment of heart disease, shock, and other medical conditions. [B]Economics: [/B]Amartya Sen (India), �for his contributions to welfare economics.� His studies, including an examination of the Bangladesh famine of 1974, have contributed to the understanding of how complex economic factors relate to famine and poverty. The committee credited him for �restoring an ethical dimension to the discussion of vital economic problems.� [B][U][SIZE="3"]1997 Nobel Prize Winners[/SIZE][/U][/B] [B]Peace:[/B] International Campaign to Ban Landmines (founded 1992) and Jody Williams (U.S.) for their work to ban and remove antipersonnel landmines worldwide. The Committee lauded their success in developing a �process which in the space of a few years changed a ban on anti-personnel mines from a vision to a feasible reality.� [B]Literature: [/B]Dario Fo (Italy) for his work as a satirical dramatist, director, and actor. �With a blend of laughter and gravity, he opens our eyes to abuses and injustices in society and also the wider historical perspective in which they can be placed,� the Committee said. [B]Physics:[/B] Steven Chu, William D. Phillips (both U.S.), and Claude Cohen-Tannoudji (France) for developing a method to cool and trap atoms using light from lasers. The discovery could lead to more accurate atomic clocks for use in space navigation. [B]Chemistry:[/B] Paul D. Boyer (U.S.), Jens C. Skou (Denmark), and John E. Walker (U.K.) for their discoveries about a molecule that allows the human body to store and transfer energy between cells. Skou received half the prize money for his discovery of an enzyme that works with adenosine triphosphate (ATP) to regulate levels of potassium and sodium in cells. Boyer and Walker shared the other half for their discovery of the process that creates ATP. [B]Medicine:[/B] Stanley B. Prusiner (U.S.) for his discovery of a new type of germ, called prions, that causes degenerative brain disorders, including �mad cow� disease. Critics conceded the existence of prions, but not that they cause disease. [B]Economics: [/B]Robert C. Merton and Myron S. Scholes (both U.S.) for developing a formula that determines the value of stock options and other derivatives. 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Microwave oven

With an atomic number of 86, what element, the heaviest of the noble gasses, uses the symbol Rn?

Inventions and Discoveries - Page 2 - CSS Forums Inventions and Discoveries King of the Ring �   Thanked 3,030 Times in 762 Posts electricity Alternating Current Induction Coil / Transformer In the 1880s every system for distributing electricity used direct current (DC). But DC transmission over long distances was impractical. Transmitting at low voltage required thick wires. Transmitting at high voltage was dangerous and could not be reduced for consumer uses such as lighting. It was known that alternating current (AC) voltage could be varied by use of induction coils, but no practical coil system had been invented. Stanley's design for such a coil-or 'transformer' as it is now called-became the prototype for all future transformers. System of Distribution by Alternating Currents Charles Proteus Steinmetz Born Apr 9 1865 - Died Oct 26 1923 System of Distribution by Alternating Currents Alternating Current Patent Number(s) 533,244 Inducted 1977 In 1893, Steinmetz joined the newly organized General Electric Company in Schenectady, New York, serving as consulting engineer until his death. Steinmetz's first important research was on the phenomenon of hysteresis, by which power is lost because of magnetic resistance. This research led him directly to a study of alternating current, which could eliminate hysteresis loss in motors. The difficulty was that there was really no theory of alternating current by which the electrical engineer could be guided. Steinmetz set out to remedy this deficiency. During the next 20 years he prepared a series of masterful papers and volumes which reduced the theory of alternating current to order. Steinmetz's last research was on lightning, which threatened to disrupt the new AC power lines. Here again he made fundamental contributions. Without Charles Steinmetz's development of theories of alternating current, the expansion of the electric power industry in the United States in the early 20th century would have been impossible, or at least greatly delayed. Electro-Magnetic Motor Nikola Tesla invented the induction motor with rotating magnetic field that made unit drives for machines feasible and made AC power transmission an economic necessity. In 1887 and 1888 Tesla had an experimental shop at 89 Liberty Street, New York, and there he invented the induction motor. He sold the invention to Westinghouse in July 1888 and spent a year in Pittsburgh instructing Westinghouse engineers. Improvement in Steam-Power Brake Devices George Westinghouse invented a system of air brakes that made travel by train safe and built one of the greatest electric manufacturing organizations in the United States. After briefly attending Union College he returned to his father's shop, where he developed and patented a rotary steam engine, a device for replacing derailed freight cars, and a railroad frog. He then worked to develop a system of railroad brakes that would centralize control in the hands of the engineer. He was awarded the first of many air brake patents in 1869 and at the age of 22 organized the Westinghouse Air Brake Company. Electric Lamp One of the outstanding geniuses in the history of technology, Thomas Edison earned patents for more than a thousand inventions, including the incandescent electric lamp, the phonograph, the carbon telephone transmitter, and the motion-picture projector. In addition, he created the world's first industrial research laboratory. In September 1878, after having viewed an exhibition of a series of eight glaring 500-candlepower arc lights, Edison boldly announced he would invent a safe, mild, and inexpensive electric light that would replace the gaslight in millions of homes; moreover, he would accomplish this by an entirely different method of current distribution from that used for arc lights. To back the lamp effort, some of New York's leading financial figures joined with Edison in October 1878 to form the Edison Electric Light Company, the predecessor of today's General Electric Company. On October 21,1879, Edison demonstrated the carbon-filament lamp, supplied with current by his special high-voltage dynamos. The pilot light-and-power station at Menlo Park glowed with a circuit of 30 lamps, each of which could be turned on or off without affecting the rest. Three years later, the Pearl Street central power station in downtown New York City was completed, initiating the electrical illumination of the cities of the world. In 1887 Edison moved his workshop from Menlo Park to West Orange, New Jersey, where he built the Edison Laboratory (now a national monument), a facility 10 times larger than the earlier one. In time it was surrounded with factories employing some 5,000 persons and producing a variety of new products, among them his improved phonograph using wax records, the mimeograph, fluoroscope, alkaline storage battery, dictating machine, and motion-picture cameras and projectors. During World War I, the aged inventor headed the Naval Consulting Board and directed research in torpedo mechanisms and antisubmarine devices. It was largely owing to his urging that Congress established the Naval Research Laboratory, the first institution for military research, in 1920. Throughout his career, Edison consciously directed his studies to devices that could satisfy real needs and come into popular use. Indeed, it may be said that in applying himself to technology, he was fulfilling the ideals of democracy, for he centered his attention upon projects that would increase the convenience and pleasure of mankind. Incandescent Electric Lamp Irving Langmuir's work led to two major inventions: the high-vacuum electron tube and the gas-filled incandescent lamp. Fluorescent Lamp Germer received the Frank P. Brown Medal from the Franklin Institute in 1954 for his fluorescent lamp. Edmund Germer's development of the fluorescent lamp and the high-pressure mercury-vapor lamp significantly increased the efficiency of lighting devices, allowing for more economical lighting while producing less heat than incandescent light. Laser Optically Pumped Laser Amplifiers; Light Amplifiers Employing Collisions to Produce a Population Inversion Gordon Gould coined the word laser and patented optically pumped and discharge excited laser amplifiers now used in most industrial, commercial, and medical applications of lasers. Gould and his assignee, Patlex Corporation, now hold the basic patents covering optically pumped and discharge excited laser amplifiers. These lasers are used in 80 percent of the industrial, commercial, and medical applications of lasers. Gould also holds patents on laser uses and fiber optic communications. Ruby Laser Systems Physicist Theodore Harold Maiman invented the first operable laser. While employed at Hughes Research Laboratories as a section head in 1960, he developed, demonstrated, and patented a laser using a pink ruby medium, for which he gained worldwide recognition. The laser�s impact has rippled through numerous industries. Laser beams are being used in medicine, industry, electronic, data processing, communications, and scientific research in a myriad of ways. Doctors use them to remove tattoos and port wine stains (birthmarks), to repair detached retinas, and to perform bloodless surgery. Industry uses lasers to weld, drill, cut, seam, mark, and heat treat with the effect of high yield, excellent reproducibility, and higher throughput with consequence of improved productivity. Electronic firms use lasers to trim resistors and capacitors and to fashion and anneal transistor �chips� to extremely high accuracy. Lasers are used in supermarket scanners to automate checkout; and now are used in the home in optical videodisc players. With the use of the laser, written and read-out, optical memory will increase storage capacity of computer information to 100 times the density of a magnetic disc or tape. Another innovation is the use of lasers to transmit light for miles without repeaters through hair-thin glass fibers to replace traditional wires in communication. Early on, laser beams were used to measure the 200,000 mile distance to the moon � within one inch. Many scientists predict lasers will play a significant role in harnessing the power of hydrogen ions � known as atomic fusion � in the future. Masers and Maser Communications System Arthur L. Schawlow was co-inventor of the laser. He worked with Charles H. Townes, who was inducted into the National Inventors Hall of Fame in 1976. Schawlow and Townes were seeking ways to extend the maser principle of amplifying electromagnetic waves into the shorter wavelengths of infrared and visible light. They published a proposal for the laser in a 1958 issue of Physical Review and received a patent for it in 1960. By the end of the 1960s, eye surgeons were already routinely using lasers, taking advantage of the fact that they can be made minutely small and precisely focused. In 1961, Schawlow became professor of physics at Stanford University. It was in 1981 that Schawlow received the Nobel Prize in physics for his work in laser spectroscopy. Today, the laser is prevalent in many areas, including the medical, defense and communications fields. Production of Electromagnetic Energy; Masers and Maser Communications System Charles Townes' invention of the maser, a device that amplifies electromagnetic waves, created a means for the sensitive reception of communications and for precise navigation. The maser provided basic components of the laser, for which Townes also received a patent. The difference between a maser and a laser is that the laser utilizes visible light. Apart from being useful tools in the laboratory, both masers and lasers have found many applications in radar, communications, astronomy, navigation, atomic clocks, surgery, and industry. Magnetron Asymmetrically Conductive Device and Method of Making the Same Robert Hall invented the version of the magnetron that operates most microwave ovens, the semiconductor laser found in compact disk players, and power rectifiers that greatly improved power transmission efficiency. His basic rectifier structure, with silicon replacing the germanium, is used today for AC-to-DC power conversion in electric locomotives and high-voltage DC electrical transmission. In 1962 Hall invented the semiconductor injection laser, a device now used in all compact disk players and laser printers, and most optical fiber communications systems. High Efficiency Magnetron Percy Spencer, while working for the Raytheon Company, discovered a more efficient way to manufacture magnetrons. In 1941, magnetrons were being produced at a rate of 17 per day. Spencer set out to create a simpler magnetron that could be mass produced. The result was a magnetron that replaced precision copper bars with lamina and replaced soldered internal wires with a simple solid ring. These improvements and others allowed for the faster production of 2,600 magnetrons per day. In 1945, Spencer created a device to cook food using microwave radiation. Raytheon saw the possibilities of this, and after acquiring Amana Refrigeration in 1965, was able to sell microwave ovens on a large scale. The first microwave oven was called the Radarange, and today, there are over 200 million in use throughout the world. This discovery led to significant advances in radar and his most popular invention, the microwave oven. Quote: Note: In order to make this thread more fruitful, Members are requested to add in this regard. Thank you very much ஜ иστнιπg ι� ιмթΘรรιвlε тσ α ωιℓℓιиg нєαят ஜ The Following User Says Thank You to Sureshlasi For This Useful Post: King of the Ring �   Thanked 3,030 Times in 762 Posts Imaging Electrophotography Physicist Chester F. Carlson, the father of xerographic printing, was born in Seattle, Washington. Plagued by needs for copies of patent drawings and specifications, Carlson investigated ways of automatic text and illustration reproduction, working out of his apartment. While others sought chemical or photographic solutions to 'instant copying' problems, Carlson turned to electrostatics and in 1938 succeeded in obtaining his first 'dry-copy' and the first of many patents two years later. It took presentations to more than 20 companies before Carlson was able to interest the Battelle Development Corporation in his invention in 1944. In 1947 the Haloid Company-renamed Xerox Corporation-negotiated commercial rights to his xerographic development. Eleven years later, and just 10 years before his death in 1968, Xerox introduced its first office copier. High Resolution Radar and Sonar Robert H. Rines' contributions to the technology of high-resolution image-scanning radar and sonar began in the era of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology's Radiation Laboratory with modulation techniques for the Microwave Early Warning System developed secretly during World War II. In peace time, his inventions were basic to high-definition sonar scanning systems used in locating the Titanic and the Bismarck. They are also used in new medical instrumentation allowing noninvasive ultrasound imaging of internal organs. His patents underlie nearly all the high-definition image-scanning radar used to provide early-warning, weapons fire-control, and some artillery and missile detection radars during the war in the Persian Gulf. Multiplane Camera Seldom has an individual become so intrinsically linked to a concept as Walt Disney has with the concept of imagination. His was the catalyst for his incredible body of work, which in turn fed the imagination of millions who have been inspired by it. Disney�s invention of the multiplane camera brought better looking, richer animation and in 1937, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was the first full-length animated film to use the camera. The movies that Disney created are amazingly diverse and illustrate the range of his inventiveness. Photo Composing Machine Louis Marius Moyroud and Rene Alphonse Higonnet developed the first practical phototypesetting machine. Born in Moirans, Isere, France, Moyroud attended engineering school from 1929 to 1936 and graduated as an engineer from Ecole Nationale Superieure des Arts et Metiers of Cluny, France. He served in the military as a second lieutenant from 1936 to 1938 and as a first lieutenant in 1939 and 1940. He joined the LMT Laboratories, a subsidiary in Paris of ITT, in 1941 and left in 1946 to spend all of his time on photocomposition. Moyroud and Higonnet first demonstrated their first phototypesetting machine, the Lumitype-later known as the Photon-in September 1946 and introduced it to America in 1948. The Photon was further refined under the direction of the Graphic Arts Research Foundations. The first book to be composed by the Photon was printed in 1953, titled The Wonderful World of Insects. Composed without the use of metal type, it might someday rank in the historical importance of printing with the first book printed from moveable type, the Gutenberg Bible. In recent years, Moyroud has been instrumental in the development of the Euorcat Series of phototypesetting machines marketed in Europe by Bobst Graphics. Fellow communications engineer Higonnet was born in Valence, Drome, France. The son of a teacher, he was educated at the Lyc�e de Tournon and the Electrical Engineering School of Grenoble University. He was granted a scholarship by the International Institute of Education in New York in 1922, went to Carleton College in Minnesota for one year, and subsequently spent one term at the Harvard Engineering School. He was an engineer with the Materiel Telephonique, a French subsidiary of ITT, from 1924 to 1948. He then became a transmission engineer and worked on long distance cables in Paris-Strasbourg, London-Brussels, and Vienna-Budapest. He was also associated with the Patent and Information Department of ITT. Photography Method and Apparatus for Coating Plates for use in Photography Eastman began his search for a transparent and flexible film in 1884. The first commercial film, put into production a year later, was cut in narrow strips and wound on a roller device patented by Eastman and Walker. Film rolls sufficient for 100 exposures were mounted in a small box camera-the Kodak, which was introduced in 1888 priced at $25. The steady improvement of Edison's motion-picture camera also spurred Eastman to perfect a stronger film designed to fill that promising market. George Eastman's inventions of dry, rolled film and the hand-held cameras that could utilize it revolutionized photography. Stroboscope Photography Pioneering research in stroboscopic photography by Harold E. Edgerton was the foundation for the development of the modern electronic speed flash. Edgerton earned international recognition for his achievements in the related fields of stroboscopy and ultra-high speed photography. The electronic speed flash his research spurred is important to science and industry as well as routine photography. He originally perfected the use of stroboscopic lights in both ultra-high-speed motion and still (stop-motion) photography capable of revealing operations which move at speeds beyond the perceptive capacity of the human eye (i.e., bullets in flight, light bulbs shattering, etc.). Photographic Product Comprising a Rupturable Container Carrying a Photographic Processing Liquid Physicist, manufacturing executive, and inventor Edwin Herbert Land developed the first modern polarizers for light, a sequence of subsequent polarizers, and theories and practices for applications of polarized light. Video Tape Recording Broad Band Magnetic Tape Systems and Method Charles Ginsburg led the research team at Ampex Corporation in developing the first practical videotape recorder (VTR). The system used a rapidly rotating recording head to apply high-frequency signals onto a reel of magnetic tape. The VTR revolutionized television broadcasting. Ginsburg led the Ampex research team that developed a new machine that could run the tape at a much slower rate because the recording heads rotated at high speed, allowing the necessary high-frequency response. Recorded programs that could be edited replaced most live broadcasts. In 1956, CBS became the first network to employ VTR technology. __________________ ஜ иστнιπg ι� ιмթΘรรιвlε тσ α ωιℓℓιиg нєαят ஜ Last edited by Sureshlasi; Saturday, November 17, 2007 at 07:41 PM. Thanked 3,030 Times in 762 Posts Medical Anti-Leukemia drugs Gertrude Belle Elion invented the leukemia-fighting drug 6-mercaptopurine and drugs that facilitated kidney transplants. Hired by Burroughs-Wellcome (now Glaxo Wellcome) in 1944, she began work on antagonists of nucleic acid building blocks. This led to the synthesis of 6-mercaptopurine, a drug quickly marketed as Purinethol, and to another antileukemic drug, 6-thioguanine. Her continued research led to Imuran, a derivative of 6-mercaptopurine that was found to block the body's rejection of foreign tissues. In combination with other drugs, Imuran enabled kidney transplants from unrelated donors. Elion and her team were prominent in the development of allopurinol (trade name Zyloprim), for treatment of gout, and of a new antiviral agent, acyclovir (Zovirax), which has been used to battle herpes virus infections. Artificial Heart Medical researcher Willem J. Kolff invented the artificial kidney dialysis machine. The artificial kidney dialysis machine Kolff invented has been perfected through a series of improvements so that there are an estimated 55,000 people in the U.S. with end-stage renal disease that are being kept alive by this invention or a subsequent modification of it. There are an estimated 55,000 people in the U.S. with end-stage renal disease that are being kept alive by this invention or a subsequent modification of it. CAT Scan Robert S. Ledley invented the whole-body CT (computerized tomographic) diagnostic X-ray scanner. The ACTA Scanner set the fundamental design for modern CT scanners, including the first use of the convolution method for CT-image reconstruction, the first high-resolution digital TV display for medical imaging, and the tilting gantry. Ledley used ACTA to revolutionize diagnostic medicine. He was the first to do medical imaging and three-dimensional reconstructions and the first to use CT in radiation therapy planning for cancer patients and in the diagnosis of bone diseases. Cortisone Preparation of Cortisone Percy Lavon Julian synthesized physostigmine for treatment of glaucoma and cortisone for the treatment of rheumatoid arthritis. His synthesis of cortisone reduced the price of cortisone from hundreds of dollars per drop for natural cortisone to a few cents per gram. Process of Treating Pregnene Compounds Chemist Lewis Hastings Sarett prepared a synthetic version of the hormone cortisone, which was soon demonstrated as an effective treatment against rheumatoid arthritis. Sarett prepared the first synthetic cortisone in 1944, when Merck & Co. was a participant in a government effort to improve military medicine. Four years later the Mayo Clinic demonstrated the efficacy of the product against rheumatoid arthritis. In 1949, Sarett and several collaborators initiated an alternative synthesis commencing with raw materials derivable from coal, air, lime, and water. This led to the first route independent of naturally occurring starting materials. Embolectomy Catheter In 1963, Thomas Fogarty received a patent for his Fogarty� balloon embolectomy catheter, which has since become an industry standard. The device allows a thin balloon to be inserted into a patient's artery and guided through an occlusion. It is then inflated and withdrawn along with the blockage. Fogarty's catheter revolutionized vascular surgery--it is still the most widely used technique for blood clot removal--and encouraged advances for other minimally invasive surgeries, including angioplasty. Working with his biomedical design engineers at Fogarty Research, Fogarty has developed many balloon devices that are used in laparoscopy-assisted surgical procedures. Other products include a minimally invasive device for breast cancer diagnosis and therapy and a self-expanding stent-graft used to treat aortic aneurysms less invasively to reduce trauma. A native of Cincinnati, Fogarty attended Xavier University and then went on to the University of Cincinnati Medical School. Genetic Engineering Process for Producing Biologically Functional Molecular Chimeras Herb Boyer was with the University of California, San Francisco when he began investigating DNA with Stan Cohen. Their experiments marked the beginning of genetic engineering and launched the multi-billion dollar biotechnology industry. By early 1973, Boyer and Cohen determined that they were able to add genes from an organism to a simple cell; the genes would then replicate in the cell. Their recombinant DNA patents generated over $250 million in royalties before expiring. Recombinant DNA technology is considered the most significant achievement in molecular biology since Watson & Crick's work in 1953. After working with Cohen, Boyer joined forces with venture capitalist Robert Swanson to create the biotechnology firm Genentech, Inc. Since its founding in 1976, Genentech has produced a number of firsts such as genetically engineered human insulin. Genetically altered crops are also being researched to deal with global food supply issues. Glucose Detection for Diabetes Composition of Matter In the mid-1940s, Alfred Free and Helen Murray were both chemists working together in the biochemistry research group at Miles Laboratories, Inc., in Elkhart, Indiana. Married in 1947, they continued their collaboration, becoming two of the world�s leading experts on urinalysis.The Frees co-authored two books: Urodynamics and Urinalysis in Laboratory Practice, both considered notable works in the field. Their contributions include the development of dry reagents that have become the standard in laboratory urinalysis and the more consumer-oriented "dip-and-read" tests that first enabled diabetics to easily and accurately monitor their blood glucose levels on their own. Implantable Pacemaker Wilson Greatbatch invented the cardiac pacemaker, an innovation selected in 1983 by the National Society of Professional Engineers as one of the two major engineering contributions to society during the previous 50 years. Greatbatch has established a series of companies to manufacture or license his inventions, including Greatbatch Enterprises, which produces most of the world's pacemaker batteries. His original pacemaker patent resulted in the first implantable cardiac pacemaker, which has led to heart patient survival rates comparable to that of a healthy population of similar age. MRI Raymond Damadian invented the magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) scanner, which has revolutionized the field of diagnostic medicine. The MRI obtains information through the use of static and dynamic magnetic fields, a method that yields radio signal outputs from the body's tissue that can be either transformed into images or analyzed to provide the chemical composition of the tissue being examined. His MRI produced images of the interior of the body far more detailed than was possible with X-ray devices such as the CAT scanner. Since the device's approval in 1984 by the Food and Drug Administration hundreds have been put to use in medical institutions around the world. Nystatin (Antifungal / Antibiotic) Nystatin and Method of Producing It The world's first useful antifungal antibiotic, nystatin, was developed through a long-distance scientific collaboration. Working as researchers for the New York State Department of Health, Rachel Fuller Brown in Albany and Elizabeth Lee Hazen in New York City shared tests and samples through the U.S. mail. To Hazen's single-minded pursuit of an antifungal antibiotic, Brown added the skills needed to identify, characterize, and purify the various substances produced by culturing bacteria found in hundreds of soil samples. The antibiotic they developed, named 'nystatin' for the New York State Department of Health, was first introduced in practical form in 1954 following Food and Drug Administration approval. Not only did it cure many disfiguring and disabling fungal infections of the skin, mouth, throat, and intestinal tract, but it could be combined with antibacterial drugs to balance their effects. Uses for nystatin have been as varied as treating Dutch elm disease to rescuing water-damaged works of art from molds. Oral Contraceptives Frank B. Colton developed Enovid, the first oral contraceptive. Colton has made many important contributions to medicinal organic chemistry and particularly to steroid chemistry. His pioneering research on the relationship between structure and biological activity, particularly of 19-nor steroids, led to the development of Nilevar, the first orally active anabolic agent which had a distinct separation between protein building and masculinizing properties. Of even greater importance was his research which resulted in the discovery of Enovid. The introduction of this substance in 1960 for family planning purposes ushered in the era of oral contraception. Carl Djerassi is recognized for his breakthroughs in chemistry and for his effective translation of theory into practice. His achievements include establishing physical methods for determining organic molecular structure and the synthesis of many steroids. His work led to oral contraceptives, antihistamines, and anti-inflammatory agents. Penicillin Andrew J. Moyer's discoveries provided the foundation for the industrial production of penicillin. The potential of using penicillin to treat wounded soldiers was immediately recognized in World War II. However the concept of antibiotics was new, and a practical method for large-scale production was not available. Treatments required from 1-2 million Oxford units of the substance. The urgency of finding a method for mass-producing penicillin led to international cooperation. In the United States, the task was assigned to Moyer, who found that by culturing the Penicillium mold in a culture broth comprising corn steep liquor and lactose, penicillin yields could be increased many fold. This was the first known use of corn steep liquor for growing microorganisms. Moyer also discovered that with this improved medium, the fermentation could be conducted with continuous shaking, thereby further enhancing the yields and production rate. These discoveries led to industrial penicillin production, which saved thousands of lives during the war. Moyer's work also provided a model for the development of all other antibiotic fermentations. Corn steep liquor is still used in the commercial fermentation processes for making penicillin and many other antibiotics. Moyer contributed to 10 U.S. patents. Displacement of the Thiazolidine Ring in Penicillin with the Formation of a Biologically Active Cephem System Sir Alexander Fleming's 1928 discovery of penicillin in bread mold was a tremendous breakthrough for medical science. Unfortunately, Fleming's process for harvesting the antibiotic took months to generate a small amount. During World War II, as demand for penicillin rose, researchers worked feverishly to synthesize the penicillin molecule. More than a thousand scientists in 39 U.S. labs became involved in the project. But when the war ended and the molecule still had not revealed its structure, the funds for research ended. From 1948 to 1957 only one laboratory of continued the research-John Sheehan's. In March of 1957, while a professor at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Sheehan announced the first rational total synthesis of natural penicillin. The next year he reported a general total synthesis of penicillins. Pentothal / Anesthesia Thiobarbituric Acid Derivatives Ernest H. Volwiler and Donalee L. Tabern discovered the general anesthetic Pentothal, one of the most important agents in modern medicine. Volwiler and Tabern discovered Pentothal in 1936 when they were seeking a substance which could be injected directly into the blood stream to produce unconsciousness. For three years the two men screened over 200 compounds, eventually arriving at a sulfur-bearing analogue of Nembutal. Induction was smooth, pleasant, free of muscle twitching, and notably lacking in delirium or frightening psychic effects. It could be used for minor procedures requiring anesthesia or for more prolonged procedures, being administered before ether. As a result of his efforts, Abbott in 1948 became the first pharmaceutical company to supply radio pharmaceuticals to medical and research institutions. The uses of Pentothal are legend. Few agents in medicine have played such an outstanding role in improving the well-being of generations of patients. Pronged Vaccinating Needle Microbiologist Benjamin A. Rubin ground the eyelet of a sewing machine needle into a fork shape to create a vaccine delivery system that helped wipe out the killer disease smallpox. Until relatively recently smallpox was a dreaded disease, killing at least two million people annually until 1967. Smallpox could be controlled by vaccination, but the vaccine was always in short supply and, in undeveloped areas of the world, it was difficult to conduct vaccinations. Rubin was working for Wyeth Laboratories in 1965 when he began experimenting with alternatives to the conventional syringe needle. Further refinements to his ground-sewing-needle design yielded the now-familiar bifurcated (fork-shaped) needle, which he discovered would hold enough vaccine in the small space between the tines to inoculate a person with a few jabs. Rubin's needle sped vaccinations worldwide, and in 1980 the World Health Assembly declared smallpox defeated. For the first time in history, man had eradicated a deadly disease. Respirator / Ventilator Fluid Control Device; Respirator; Pediatric Ventilator On television every week in the 1960s, Dr. Kildare committed himself to making his patients better. But try as he might, some would still not respond to his treatment. At those times his hospital's slogan was, when all else fails, 'get the Bird.' 'The Bird' was a little green box which became familiar to hospital patients throughout the world after it was introduced in 1958. It was the first highly reliable, low-cost, mass-produced medical respirator in the world, and it was invented by Forrest Bird. The 'Babybird' respirator, introduced in 1970, quickly reduced infant mortality for those with respiratory problems from 70 percent to less than 10 percent worldwide. Tetracycline Lloyd H. Conover invented the antibiotic tetracycline, which became the most prescribed broad spectrum antibiotic in the United States within three years and remains the drug of choice for a number of serious bacterial infections. Tetracycline was the first therapeutically superior drug to be made by chemical alteration of an antibiotic produced by microbial metabolism. It sparked a wide-scale search for superior structurally modified antibiotics, which has provided most of the important antibiotic discoveries made since then. Vaccine for Hepatitis B Vaccine Against Viral Hepatitis and Process; Process of Viral Diagnosis and Reagent Baruch Blumberg discovered an antigen in 1963 that detected the presence of hepatitis B in blood samples. Hepatitis B is a potentially fatal disease often transmitted through blood transfusions. This hepatitis antigen, 'the Australia Antigen,' was found frequently in the blood serum of viral hepatitis sufferers. The antigen was named for an aborigine blood sample that reacted with an antibody in the serum of an American hemophilia patient. Working with Blumberg, microbiologist Irving Millman developed a test that identified hepatitis B in blood samples. The blood test screened out carriers of this infectious disease, and after blood banks began using the test in 1971, hepatitis B after blood transfusions decreased by 25 percent. The test also became the first method for screening blood donations for the hepatitis B virus. Together, Blumberg and Millman developed a vaccine against the virus. This vaccine protects people exposed to hepatitis B from infection and has been administered to millions, particularly in Asia and Africa. Since hepatitis B is an unknown factor associated with the development of liver cancer, the vaccine was the first against a major form of cancer. Vaccine Against Viral Hepatitis and Process; Process of Viral Diagnosis and Reagent In 1963, Baruch Blumberg discovered an antigen that detected the presence of hepatitis B in blood samples. Hepatitis B is a potentially fatal disease often transmitted through blood transfusions. This hepatitis antigen, 'the Australia Antigen,' was found frequently in the blood serum of viral hepatitis sufferers. The antigen was named for an aborigine blood sample that reacted with an antibody in the serum of an American hemophilia patient. Working with Blumberg, microbiologist Irving Millman developed a test that identified hepatitis B in blood samples. The blood test screened out carriers of this infectious disease, and after blood banks began using the test in 1971, hepatitis B after blood transfusions decreased by 25 percent. The test also became the first method for screening blood donations for the hepatitis B virus. Together, Blumberg and Millman developed a vaccine against the virus. This vaccine protects people exposed to hepatitis B from infection and has been a dministered to millions, particularly in Asia and Africa. Since hepatitis B is an unknown factor associated with the development of liver cancer, the vaccine was the first against a major form of cancer. Vacuum Tube (X-Ray) William D. Coolidge's name is inseparably linked with the X-ray tube-popularly called the 'Coolidge tube.' This invention completely revolutionized the generation of X-rays and remains to this day the model upon which all X-ray tubes for medical applications are patterned. Vitamins Alloxazines and Isoalloxazinesand Processes for their Production; 2-Sulphanilamido-quinoxaline Organic chemist Max Tishler developed methods for synthesizing the essential vitamin B2 as well as a poultry disease antibiotic that opened the door to broad expansion of the poultry industry. In 1937 he joined Merck & Company Inc., where his first assignment was to find a new process for the synthesis of riboflavin that would permit economical, large-scale production of the essential vitamin (B2). Later Tishler and his associates synthesized and developed a production process for sulfaquinoxaline, the first effective antibiotic for the prevention and cure of the poultry disease coccidiosis. Its use as a feed additive permitted broad expansion of poultry production.a>. His success, which contributed significantly to human health and nutrition, also led to processes for the practical synthesis of other vitamins. Process for Obtaining Vitamins Robert R. Williams, Jr., was a telephone company researcher who in his spare time developed ways to synthesize vitamins that helped fight malnutrition and vitamin-deficiency diseases. The vitamin research was conducted in his spare time with the aid of grants and space provided by Columbia University and others. Williams isolated thiamine in crystalline form in 1933 and synthesized vitamin B two years later. Merck & Company began commercial production of thiamine in 1936. Williams' patent, granted in 1942, was a forerunner in the field of chemically reconstructed vitamins. In addition to his interest in curing Oriental deficiency diseases, Williams was instrumental in the enriching flour, cornmeal, and other cereal grains in this country, wiping out the pellagra and riboflavin deficiency common among poor people. __________________ Thanked 3,030 Times in 762 Posts Chemistry Aluminum Charles Martin Hall discovered the electrolytic method of producing aluminum cheaply, bringing the metal into wide commercial use. As a young chemist experimenting in a woodshed, Charles Hall invented a method for extracting pure aluminum from its ore. Understanding aluminum's potential, Hall founded an industry that contributed to many others, particularly the manufacture of aircraft and automobiles. By 1914, Hall's process had brought the cost of aluminum down to 18 cents a pound. Aluminum, once a precious metal used for fine jewelry, is now inexpensive enough for everyday packaging. Anti-Leukemia drugs Gertrude Belle Elion invented the leukemia-fighting drug 6-mercaptopurine and drugs that facilitated kidney transplants. Hired by Burroughs-Wellcome (now Glaxo Wellcome) in 1944, she began work on antagonists of nucleic acid building blocks. This led to the synthesis of 6-mercaptopurine, a drug quickly marketed as Purinethol, and to another antileukemic drug, 6-thioguanine. Her continued research led to Imuran, a derivative of 6-mercaptopurine that was found to block the body's rejection of foreign tissues. In combination with other drugs, Imuran enabled kidney transplants from unrelated donors. Elion and her team were prominent in the development of allopurinol (trade name Zyloprim), for treatment of gout, and of a new antiviral agent, acyclovir (Zovirax), which has been used to battle herpes virus infections. Bakelite Leo Hendrik Baekeland is cited for his research in electric insulation, synthetic resins, and plastics. Using money from his first invention, Velox photographic paper, he established a laboratory, where he synthesized 'Bakelite,' a nonflammable material that was cheaper and more versatile than other known plastics. Bakelite has since been used in everything from engine parts to jewelry to electronics. Bromine Extraction Herbert Henry Dow, founder of the Dow Chemical Company, was one of the creators of the modem American chemical industry. His inventions included such diverse items as electric light carbons, steam and internal combustion engines, automatic furnace controls, and water seals, but most of his inventions were chemical in nature. Most of his chemical patents were for truly "pioneer" inventions. The remainder were practical improvements which took halogen science from theory to reality, creating employment and an environment which encouraged a healthy combination of basic and applied research. The combined effect of his inventions was to improve the quality of life for millions of people around the world. Carborundum Edward Acheson's discovery of carborundum, a highly effective abrasive used in manufacturing, was an important influence in advancing the industrial era. In the mid 1890s, Acheson discovered that overheating carborundum produced almost pure graphite. This graphite was another major discovery for him, and it became extremely valuable and helpful as a lubricant. In 1926, the U.S. Patent Office named carborundum as one of the 22 patents most responsible for the industrial age. Not long after that, it was noted that without carborundum, the mass production manufacturing of precision-ground, interchangeable metal parts would be practically impossible. Cortisone Born Apr 11 1899 - Died Apr 19 1975 Preparation of Cortisone Patent Number(s) 2,752,339 Inducted 1990 Percy Lavon Julian synthesized physostigmine for treatment of glaucoma and cortisone for the treatment of rheumatoid arthritis. His synthesis of cortisone reduced the price of cortisone from hundreds of dollars per drop for natural cortisone to a few cents per gram. Process of Treating Pregnene Compounds Chemist Lewis Hastings Sarett prepared a synthetic version of the hormone cortisone, which was soon demonstrated as an effective treatment against rheumatoid arthritis. Sarett prepared the first synthetic cortisone in 1944, when Merck & Co. was a participant in a government effort to improve military medicine. Four years later the Mayo Clinic demonstrated the efficacy of the product against rheumatoid arthritis. In 1949, Sarett and several collaborators initiated an alternative synthesis commencing with raw materials derivable from coal, air, lime, and water. This led to the first route independent of naturally occurring starting materials. Dynamite Alfred Nobel, the inventor of dynamite, was also a great industrialist. In 1863, Nobel developed the Nobel patent detonator, which detonated nitroglycerin using a strong shock rather than heat. In 1865, the Nobel Company built the first factory for producing nitroglycerin. This led to the establishment of many factories around the world. Nitroglycerin in its fluid state is very volatile. Nobel recognized this, and eventually patented dynamite, a combination of nitroglycerin absorbed by a porous substance. This gave him an easily handled, solid yet malleable explosive. Mining, railroad building, and other construction became safer, more efficient, and cheaper. HDPE and Polypropylene Plastics Robert Banks and fellow research chemist Paul Hogan were working for Phillips Petroleum in 1951 when they invented crystalline polypropylene and high-density polyethylene (HDPE). Together, the plastics were marketed under the brand name Marlex�, which has since made its way into every corner of American life. Banks and Hogan began working together in 1946. Low-density polyethylene already existed, but manufacturing it required extremely high pressures. While working on another project to improve yields of high-octane gasoline--the two chemists discovered crystalline polypropylene. They experimented further and found they were able to produce HDPE in a low pressure situation. Their discoveries launched a multi-billion dollar industry. Today, over 55 billion pounds of HDPE are manufactured each year. Plastic products include gallon milk jugs, laundry baskets, indoor-outdoor carpeting, and artificial turf. Isothiocyanate Compounds (Antigen) Isothiocyanate Compounds and Means of Producing the Same Antibodies are the body's protectors. When antigens, such as bacteria or viruses, enter the body, antibodies from a previous infection or vaccine combine with them and deactivate the invaders. During the 1950s, as medical researchers came to understand this relationship, it became a priority to identify antigens. Joseph Burckhalter and Robert Seiwald made an essential contribution to the identification of antigens through the synthesis of fluorescein isothiocyanate, better known as FITC. The first practical and first patented antibody labeling agent, the stable, yellow-green-fluorescent compound has become widely used for rapid, accurate, and economic diagnosis of infectious diseases. FITC has played an important role in identifying the cause of AIDS and can be used to distinguish between different strains of streptococci. It has proved infallible in tests for syphilis. FITC and red RITC (rhodamine isothiocyanate) are used together to quickly diagnose leukemia and lymphoma. FITC also paved the way for the development of other labeling procedures, such as radioimmunoassay and enzyme-linked immosorbent assay (ELISA). Kevlar Kwolek's earliest work pioneered low-temperature processes for the preparation of condensation polymers and resulted in hundreds of new polymers, including Kapton polyimide film, and Nomex aramid polymer and fiber. As she carried out experiments to make stronger and stiffer fibers, she discovered an amazing branch of polymer science-liquid crystalline polymers. Thousands of police can attest to the value of Stephanie Kwolek's breakthrough research in para-aramid fibers. The fruits of her inventiveness can be found in mooring ropes, fiber-optic cables, aircraft parts, canoes, and-most important to police-in lightweight bullet-resistant vests. Nystatin (Antifungal / Antibiotic) The world's first useful antifungal antibiotic, nystatin, was developed through a long-distance scientific collaboration. Working as researchers for the New York State Department of Health, Rachel Fuller Brown in Albany and Elizabeth Lee Hazen in New York City shared tests and samples through the U.S. mail. To Hazen's single-minded pursuit of an antifungal antibiotic, Brown added the skills needed to identify, characterize, and purify the various substances produced by culturing bacteria found in hundreds of soil samples. The antibiotic they developed, named 'nystatin' for the New York State Department of Health, was first introduced in practical form in 1954 following Food and Drug Administration approval. Not only did it cure many disfiguring and disabling fungal infections of the skin, mouth, throat, and intestinal tract, but it could be combined with antibacterial drugs to balance their effects. Uses for nystatin have been as varied as treating Dutch elm disease to rescuing water-damaged works of art from molds. Oral Contraceptives Frank B. Colton developed Enovid, the first oral contraceptive. Colton has made many important contributions to medicinal organic chemistry and particularly to steroid chemistry. His pioneering research on the relationship between structure and biological activity, particularly of 19-nor steroids, led to the development of Nilevar, the first orally active anabolic agent which had a distinct separation between protein building and masculinizing properties. Of even greater importance was his research which resulted in the discovery of Enovid. The introduction of this substance in 1960 for family planning purposes ushered in the era of oral contraception. Pasteurization French chemist Louis Pasteur was the founder of microbiological sciences. Pasteur's studies of fermentation began in Lille when he was approached by an industrialist disturbed because undesirable products often appeared during the fermentation of sugar into alcohol by yeast. Pasteur postulated that these products came from microscopic organisms other than yeast and suggested that each particular type of fermentation was the effect of a specific microorganism, called the germ. He soon illustrated this revolutionary theory with brilliant studies on the conversion of sugar. Pasteur claimed that types of microbes could be separated from each other by proper techniques, and could be shown to differ in nutritional requirements and in their susceptibility to antiseptics. He also suggested that just as each type of fermentation was caused by a particular type of germ, so it was with many types of diseases. Pasteur became preoccupied with the origin of microorganisms and demonstrated that each microbe is derived from a pre-existing microbe, and that spontaneous generation does not occur. Spoilage of perishable products could be prevented by destroying the microbes already present in these products and by protecting the sterilized material against subsequent contamination. Pasteur applied this theory to the preservation of beverages and foodstuffs, introducing the technique of heat treatment now known as pasteurization. Peanut Products Agricultural chemist George Washington Carver developed crop-rotation methods for conserving nutrients in soil and discovered hundreds of new uses for crops such as the peanut, which created new markets for farmers, especially in the South. At Tuskegee, Carver developed his crop rotation method, which alternated nitrate producing legumes-such as peanuts and peas-with cotton, which depletes soil of its nutrients. Following Carver's lead, southern farmers soon began planting peanuts one year and cotton the next. While many of the peanuts were used to feed livestock, large surpluses quickly developed. Carver then developed 325 different uses for the extra peanuts-from cooking oil to printers ink. When he discovered that the sweet potato and the pecan also enriched depleted soils, Carver found almost 20 uses for these crops, including synthetic rubber and material for paving highways. Pentothal / Anesthesia Ernest H. Volwiler and Donalee L. Tabern discovered the general anesthetic Pentothal, one of the most important agents in modern medicine. Volwiler and Tabern discovered Pentothal in 1936 when they were seeking a substance which could be injected directly into the blood stream to produce unconsciousness. For three years the two men screened over 200 compounds, eventually arriving at a sulfur-bearing analogue of Nembutal. Induction was smooth, pleasant, free of muscle twitching, and notably lacking in delirium or frightening psychic effects. It could be used for minor procedures requiring anesthesia or for more prolonged procedures, being administered before ether. As a result of his efforts, Abbott in 1948 became the first pharmaceutical company to supply radio pharmaceuticals to medical and research institutions. The uses of Pentothal are legend. Few agents in medicine have played such an outstanding role in improving the well-being of generations of patients. pH Meter Arnold O. Beckman invented a pH meter for measuring acidity and alkalinity and the quartz spectrophotometer, an instrument which pioneered automatic chemical analysis. Polymerase Chain Reacton The polymerase chain reaction, which was devised by Kary Mullis, has revolutionized DNA technology. PCR amplifies specific DNA sequences from very small amounts of complex genetic material. The amplification produces an almost unlimited number of highly purified DNA molecules suitable for analysis or manipulation. PCR has allowed screening for genetic and infectious diseases. Analysis of DNAs from different populations, including DNA from extinct species, has allowed the reconstruction of phylogenetic trees including primates and humans. PCR is essential to forensics and paternity testing. It has had a major impact on molecular biology, medicine, forensics, molecular paleontology, and many related fields. Polyurethane Process for Making Polymeric Products and for Modifying Polymeric Products William Edward Hanford and Donald Fletcher Holmes invented the process for making the multipurpose material polyurethane.They teamed up at E.I. du Pont de Nemours & Company, receiving their polyurethane patent in 1942. The process they developed reacts polyols and related hydroxy compounds with di-isocyanates. This method is the basis today for the manufacture of all polyurethanes. Flexible polyurethane foam is used as an upholstery material, and the rigid foam is commonly used as a heat-insulating material in homes, offices, and refrigerators. Polyurethane is also used in life-saving artificial hearts, safety padding in modern automobiles, and in carpeting. Polyvinyl Chloride (PVC) In 1926 Waldo Semon, newly employed in the research department at The BFGoodrich Company in Akron, Ohio, decided to pursue a dubious project. Instead of digging into his assigned work, he began trying to dissolve an undesirable material called polyvinyl chloride (PVC) to create an adhesive for bonding rubber to metal. 'People then thought of PVC as worthless back then,' Semon recalled. 'They'd throw it in the trash.' Semon never succeeded in creating the adhesive, but by heating PVC in a solvent at a high boiling point he discovered a substance that was both flexible and elastic. At first no one literally knew what to make of Semon's newfangled substance, but decades later PVC has become the world's second-best-selling plastic, generating billions of dollars in sales each year. Scotchgard (TM) Textile Proctector Chemist Patsy Sherman and colleague Sam Smith were working at 3M Company when they created Scotchgard�. Scotchgard went on to become one of the most widely used and valuable products in stain repellency and soil removal, eventually bringing in over $300 million annually for 3M. Sherman and Smith teamed up to develop the line of Scotchgard products after an accidental spill of a fluorochemical rubber intended for jet fuel hoses showed resistance to water and oily liquids. After the introduction in 1956 of a stain repellent treatment for wool, they later developed products designed for clothing, household linens, upholstery, and carpeting. Their research culminated in the late 1960s when they developed a product that both repelled stains and also permitted the removal of oily soils from synthetic fabrics, including the newly popular permanent press fabrics. Sherman and Smith jointly hold 13 patents in fluorochemical polymers and polymerization processes. Synthetic Rubber Diamine-Dicarboxylic Acid Salts and Process of Preparing Same; Synthetic Fiber Wallace Hume Carothers, who has been called one of the most brilliant organic chemists ever employed by E.I. du Pont de Nemours & Company, spent only nine years at Du Pont before his death. But in that time he made contributions to the theory of organic chemistry that led to the invention of polymeric materials such as the synthetic materials nylon and neoprene, the first commercially successful synthetic rubber. During his brief period at Du Pont, Carothers first worked on the polymerization of acetylene and its derivatives; this led to the development by other scientists of neoprene. His most outstanding work involved the theory of linear polymerization, which he tested by synthesizing a large number of polymers structurally similar to cellulose and silk. This work culminated in the production of nylon, which is today used in a wide variety of applications including apparel, carpeting, home furnishings, and industrial products. The invention of nylon marked the beginning of a new era of synthetic fibers which is still expanding. Vinyl Derivatives of Acetylene and Method of Preparing the Same Rev. Julius Nieuwland, C.S.C., was the inventor of the first synthetic rubber, neoprene, manufactured by the DuPont Company. His work with acetylene also led him into a collaboration with scientists from DuPont. Working with them, he found that if monovinylacetylene were treated with hydrogen chloride and the resulting chloroprene polymerized, neoprene would result. Eventually, neoprene was put on the market in 1932 by DuPont under the brand name Duprene. Neoprene was considered superior to rubber in many ways such as in its resistance to sunlight, abrasion, and temperature extremes. These properties made it popular in many industries. For instance, neoprene is favored for electrical cable insulation, telephone house-to-house wiring, many moulded, extruded, and sheet products, rug backings, and roofing. Teflon Chemist Roy J. Plunkett discovered tetrafluoroethylene resin while researching refrigerants at DuPont. Known by its trade name, Teflon, Plunkett's discovery was found to be extremely heat-tolerant and stick-resistant. After ten years of research, Teflon was introduced in 1949. Teflon has become an important coating for everything from satellite components to cookware. Tetracycline Lloyd H. Conover invented the antibiotic tetracycline, which became the most prescribed broad spectrum antibiotic in the United States within three years and remains the drug of choice for a number of serious bacterial infections. Tetracycline was the first therapeutically superior drug to be made by chemical alteration of an antibiotic produced by microbial metabolism. It sparked a wide-scale search for superior structurally modified antibiotics, which has provided most of the important antibiotic discoveries made since then. Titanium In 1932, Luxembourg native William Kroll invented a process to produce metallic titanium. He combined titanium tetrachloride with calcium to produce ductile titanium. By 1938, Kroll had produced 50 pounds of titanium using his process, later named the "Kroll Process". Titanium in its pure form had been discovered by William Gregor in 1791, but it was difficult to obtain from its natural state and, when heated, it yielded a useless substance. Titanium is the fourth most abundant structural metal on Earth and today remains vital in the production of jet engines and piping systems. It is also used in artificial hips and knees and is a key ingredient in golf clubs, watches and marine equpment. Transparent Silica A periodic chart that Franklin Hyde once designed had the element silicon placed directly in the center - not surprising, since Hyde�s work with glass-related technology and his role in launching the silicone industry all derive from silicon. Silicone fluids resist decomposition from heat and water, so they are used often as lubricants, hydraulic fluids and water repellents. Hyde worked extensively on silicone rubbers, which are extremely resistant to aging, sunlight, moisture, temperature extremes and many chemicals. They are used often as caulks, gaskets, electrical insulators, O-rings and heat-resistant seals. Hyde�s ultra-pure glass has many uses, including spacecraft windows, telescopes, and precision lenses for manufacturing equipment. It also provided the bases for the semiconductor and fiber optics industries. Hyde also discovered how to convert silicon-containing compounds into silicones. Now, almost all major industries rely on the silicone industry to supply a wide range of important materials. Vulcanization of Rubber Natural or India rubber, as it was then known, was of limited usefulness to industry. Rubber products melted in hot weather, froze and cracked in cold, and adhered to virtually everything until the day in the mid-19th century when inventor Charles Goodyear accidentally dropped some rubber mixed with sulfur on a hot stove. Goodyear's discovery of what came to be known as vulcanization strengthened rubber so it could be applied to a vast variety of industrial uses, including, eventually, automobile tires. __________________ Thanked 3,030 Times in 762 Posts Industrial Air Conditioner American engineer and inventor Willis Haviland Carrier developed the formulae and equipment that made air conditioning possible. The world's first spray type air conditioning equipment was Carrier's 'Apparatus for Treating Air,' which he correctly predicted would be used to enhance comfort as well as improve industrial processes and products. In 1911 Carrier disclosed his basic 'Rational Psychrometric Formulae' to the American Society of Mechanical Engineers. The formulae still stand as the basis for all fundamental calculations in the air conditioning industry. His development of the first safe, low pressure centrifugal refrigeration machine using nontoxic, nonflammable refrigerant marked the beginning of the era of comfort cooling. Carrier's early work in developing centrifugal refrigeration machines led to new safe refrigerants for which he also received several patents. By controlling humidity as well as temperature, he invented air conditioning as we know it today. Automatic Engine Lubricator Elijah McCoy received his first patent for an automatic lubricating device in 1872. Previously, engines had to be stopped before necessary lubrication could be applied. McCoy's invention allowed engines to be lubricated while they ran, saving precious time and money. Automobile Transmission Mechanism Pioneering automotive engineer Henry Ford held many patents on automotive mechanisms. He is best remembered, however, for helping devise the factory assembly approach to production that revolutionized the auto industry by greatly reducing the time required to assemble a car. Engine Starting Device; Engine Starting, Lighting and Ignition System Charles Franklin Kettering invented the first electrical ignition system and the self-starter for automobile engines and the first practical engine-driven generator. Bromine Extraction Herbert Henry Dow, founder of the Dow Chemical Company, was one of the creators of the modem American chemical industry. His inventions included such diverse items as electric light carbons, steam and internal combustion engines, automatic furnace controls, and water seals, but most of his inventions were chemical in nature. Most of his chemical patents were for truly "pioneer" inventions. The remainder were practical improvements which took halogen science from theory to reality, creating employment and an environment which encouraged a healthy combination of basic and applied research. The combined effect of his inventions was to improve the quality of life for millions of people around the world. Dynamite Alfred Nobel, the inventor of dynamite, was also a great industrialist. In 1863, Nobel developed the Nobel patent detonator, which detonated nitroglycerin using a strong shock rather than heat. In 1865, the Nobel Company built the first factory for producing nitroglycerin. This led to the establishment of many factories around the world. Nitroglycerin in its fluid state is very volatile. Nobel recognized this, and eventually patented dynamite, a combination of nitroglycerin absorbed by a porous substance. This gave him an easily handled, solid yet malleable explosive. Mining, railroad building, and other construction became safer, more efficient, and cheaper. Electrostatic Precipitator As industrial smokestacks became a common sight at the turn of the century, Frederick Cottrell realized that pollution might be controlled and that valuable raw materials were vanishing into the atmosphere with the unwanted gases. In 1907 he applied for a patent for a device that passed high-voltage direct current to a discharge electrode which leaked the charge onto particles passing by in the fumes. These charged particles were then electrically attracted to an electrode with an opposite charge, where they could be collected and retrieved as valuable minerals or chemical compounds. Cottrell's electrostatic precipitator, which became known simply as a 'Cottrell,' removed from 90 to 98 percent of all particles from escaping smoke and gases. The term 'cottrell' can still be found in the unabridged dictionary. Magnetron Asymmetrically Conductive Device and Method of Making the Same Robert Hall invented the version of the magnetron that operates most microwave ovens, the semiconductor laser found in compact disk players, and power rectifiers that greatly improved power transmission efficiency. His basic rectifier structure, with silicon replacing the germanium, is used today for AC-to-DC power conversion in electric locomotives and high-voltage DC electrical transmission. In 1962 Hall invented the semiconductor injection laser, a device now used in all compact disk players and laser printers, and most optical fiber communications systems. High Efficiency Magnetron Percy Spencer, while working for the Raytheon Company, discovered a more efficient way to manufacture magnetrons. In 1941, magnetrons were being produced at a rate of 17 per day. Spencer set out to create a simpler magnetron that could be mass produced. The result was a magnetron that replaced precision copper bars with lamina and replaced soldered internal wires with a simple solid ring. These improvements and others allowed for the faster production of 2,600 magnetrons per day. In 1945, Spencer created a device to cook food using microwave radiation. Raytheon saw the possibilities of this, and after acquiring Amana Refrigeration in 1965, was able to sell microwave ovens on a large scale. The first microwave oven was called the Radarange, and today, there are over 200 million in use throughout the world. Numerical Control John Parsons changed the control of machines and industrial processes from an imprecise craft to an exact science, spawning a second industrial revolution. He brought computers to aircraft design, manufacturing, and real-time management reporting. He developed Numerical Control-produced evaporative patterns to replace weldments with streamlined castings, which revolutionized the production of automobile body dies. Polyvinyl Chloride (PVC) In 1926 Waldo Semon, newly employed in the research department at The BFGoodrich Company in Akron, Ohio, decided to pursue a dubious project. Instead of digging into his assigned work, he began trying to dissolve an undesirable material called polyvinyl chloride (PVC) to create an adhesive for bonding rubber to metal. 'People then thought of PVC as worthless back then,' Semon recalled. 'They'd throw it in the trash.' Semon never succeeded in creating the adhesive, but by heating PVC in a solvent at a high boiling point he discovered a substance that was both flexible and elastic. At first no one literally knew what to make of Semon's newfangled substance, but decades later PVC has become the world's second-best-selling plastic, generating billions of dollars in sales each year. Punch Card Tabulator Herman Hollerith invented and developed a punch-card tabulation machine system that revolutionized statistical computation. Hollerith began working on the tabulating system during his days at MIT, filing for the first patent in 1884. He developed a hand-fed 'press' that sensed the holes in punched cards; a wire would pass through the holes into a cup of mercury beneath the card closing the electrical circuit. This process triggered mechanical counters and sorter bins and tabulated the appropriate data. Hollerith's system-including punch, tabulator, and sorter-allowed the official 1890 population count to be tallied in six months, and in another two years all the census data was completed and defined; the cost was $5 million below the forecasts and saved more than two years' time. His later machines mechanized the card-feeding process, added numbers, and sorted cards, in addition to merely counting data. In 1896 Hollerith founded the Tabulating Machine Company, forerunner of Computer Tabulating Recording Company (CTR). He served as a consulting engineer with CTR until retiring in 1921. In 1924 CTR changed its name to IBM - the International Business Machines Corporation. Steam Generator George H. Babcock and Stephen Wilcox invented an improved water tube steamboiler, which provided a safer and more efficient production of steam. Tapered Roller Bearings Henry Timken invented the Timken® tapered roller bearing. He found that conventional bearings of the 19th century worked well at reducing friction, but ran into problems when the wheels had to bear heavy loads from the sides, as when vehicles turn. So, in 1895, with the help of his two sons and a nephew, he began experiments to make a better bearing. He developed Timken tapered roller bearings to bear the heavy side loads. In the 1920s, The Timken Company was making 90 percent of the country's bearings. By the early 1990s, they supplied nearly a third of the world's tapered roller bearings. __________________ ஜ иστнιπg ι� ιмթΘรรιвlε тσ α ωιℓℓιиg нєαят ஜ Last edited by Sureshlasi; Saturday, November 17, 2007 at 08:04 PM. Thanked 3,030 Times in 762 Posts Nobel Prizes The Nobel prizes are awarded under the will of Alfred Bernhard Nobel, Swedish chemist and engineer, who died in 1896. The interest of the fund is divided annually among the persons who have made the most outstanding contributions in the fields of physics, chemistry, and physiology or medicine, who have produced the most distinguished literary work of an idealist tendency, and who have contributed most toward world peace. In 1968, a Nobel Prize of economic sciences was established by Riksbank, the Swedish bank, in celebration of its 300th anniversary. The prize was awarded for the first time in 1969. The prizes for physics and chemistry are awarded by the Swedish Academy of Science in Stockholm, the one for physiology or medicine by the Caroline Medical Institute in Stockholm, that for literature by the Academy in Stockholm, and that for peace by a committee of five elected by the Norwegian Storting. The distribution of prizes was begun on December 10, 1901, the anniversary of Nobel's death. The amount of each prize varies with the income from the fund and in 2007 is worth ten million Swedish kroners, or more than one and a half million U.S. dollars. No Nobel prizes were awarded for 1940, 1941, and 1942; prizes for literature were not awarded for 1914, 1918, and 1943. 2007 Nobel Prize Winners Physics: Albert Fert (France) and Peter Gr�nberg (Germany) for "the discovery of giant magnetoresistance," the technology used to read data on hard disks Medicine: Mario R. Capecchi (U.S.), Sir Martin J. Evans (U.K.), and Oliver Smithies (U.S.) for "their discoveries of principles for introducing specific gene modifications in mice by the use of embryonic stem cells" Chemistry: Gerhard Ertl (Germany) for "his studies of chemical processes on solid surfaces" Literature: Doris Lessing (U.K.) "that epicist of the female experience, who with skepticism, fire and visionary power has subjected a divided civilization to scrutiny" Peace: Al Gore (U.S.) and the United Nations' Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (Switzerland) for "their efforts to build up and disseminate greater knowledge about man-made climate change, and to lay the foundations for the measures that are needed to counteract such change" Economics: Leonid Hurwicz (U.S.), Eric S. Maskin (U.S.), and Roger B. Myerson (U.S.) "for having laid the foundations of mechanism design theory" 2006 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: Muhammad Yunus (Bangladesh) and the Grameen Bank of Bangladesh for �their efforts to create economic and social development from below� Literature: Orhan Pamuk (Turkey) �who in the quest for the melancholic soul of his native city has discovered new symbols for the clash and interlacing of cultures� Physics: John C. Mather and George F. Smoot (both U.S.) for �their discovery of the blackbody form and anisotropy of the cosmic microwave background radiation� Chemistry: Roger D. Kornberg (U.S.) for �his studies of the molecular basis of eukaryotic transcription� Physiology or Medicine: Andrew Z. Fire and Craig C. Mello (both U.S.) for �their discovery of RNA interference - gene silencing by double-stranded RNA� Economics: Edmund S. Phelps (U.S.) for �his analysis of intertemporal tradeoffs in macroeconomic policy� 2005 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: Mohamed ElBaradei (Egypt) and International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA) for �their efforts to prevent nuclear energy from being used for military purposes and to ensure that nuclear energy for peaceful purposes is used in the safest possible way� Literature: Harold Pinter (United Kingdom) �who in his plays uncovers the precipice under everyday prattle and forces entry into oppression's closed rooms� Physics: Roy J. Glauber (U.S.) for �his contribution to the quantum theory of optical coherence,� and John L. Hall (U.S.) and Theodor W. H�nsch (Germany) for �their contributions to the development of laser-based precision spectroscopy, including the optical frequency comb technique� Chemistry: Yves Chauvin (France), Robert H. Grubbs (U.S.), and Richard R. Schrock (U.S.) for �the development of the metathesis method in organic synthesis� Physiology or Medicine: Barry J. Marshall and J. Robin Warren (both Australia) for their discovery that the bacterium Helicobacter pylori causes gastritis and peptic ulcer disease Economics: Robert J. Aumann (U.S.) and Thomas C. Schelling (U.S.) for �having enhanced our understanding of conflict and cooperation through game-theory analysis� __________________ Thanked 3,030 Times in 762 Posts 2004 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: Wangari Maathai (Kenya) �for her contribution to sustainable development, democracy and peace� Literature: Elfriede Jelinek (Austria) �for her musical flow of voices and counter-voices in novels and plays that with extraordinary linguistic zeal reveal the absurdity of society's clich�s and their subjugating power� Physics: David J. Gross, H. David Politzer, and Frank Wilczek (all U.S.) �for the discovery of asymptotic freedom in the theory of the strong interaction.� Chemistry: Aaron Ciechanover (Israel), Avram Hershko (Israel), and Irwin Rose (U.S.) �for the discovery of ubiquitin-mediated protein degradation.� Physiology or Medicine: Richard Axel and Linda Buck (both U.S.) �for their discoveries of odorant receptors and the organization of the olfactory system.� Economics: Finn E. Kydland (Norway) and Edward C. Prescott (U.S.) �for their contributions to dynamic macroeconomics: the time consistency of economic policy and the driving forces behind business cycles.� 2003 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: Shirin Ebadi (Iran), for her work as a human rights activist and lawyer. Literature: J. M. Coetzee (South Africa). Physics: Alexei A. Abrikosov (Russia, U.S.), Anthony J. Leggett (UK, U.S.), and Vitaly L. Ginzburg (Russia), for theories about superconductivity. Chemistry: Peter Agre and Roderick MacKinnon (both U.S.) for studies on channels in cell walls. Medicine: Paul C. Lauterbur (U.S.) and Sir Peter Mansfield (UK) for discoveries leading to magnetic resonance imaging (MRI). Economics: Robert F. Engle (U.S.) and Clive W. J. Granger (UK), for developing statistical tools to improve analysis of stock prices and other data. 2002 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: Jimmy Carter, former president of the United States, was cited for �his decades of untiring effort to find peaceful solutions to international conflicts, to advance democracy and human rights, and to promote economic and social development.� Literature: Imre Kert�sz (Hungary) for �writing that upholds the fragile experience of the individual against the barbaric arbitrariness of history.� Kert�sz often draws on his experiences as a prisoner in Auschwitz in his works, which explore �the possibility of continuing to live and think as an individual in an era in which the subjection of human beings to social forces has become increasingly complete.� Physics: One-half jointly to Raymond Davis, Jr. (U.S.) and Masatoshi Koshiba (Japan) for �pioneering contributions to astrophysics, in particular for the detection of cosmic neutrinos,� and one-half to Riccardo Giacconi (U.S.) for �pioneering contributions to astrophysics, which have led to the discovery of cosmic X-ray sources.� The laureates have used cosmic particles, the smallest components of the universe, to �increase our understanding of the very largest: the Sun, stars, galaxies, and supernovae.� Chemistry: One-half jointly to John B. Fenn (U.S.) and Koichi Tanaka (Japan) for �their development of soft desorption ionization methods for mass spectrometric analyses of biological macromolecules,� and one-half to Kurt W�thrich (Switzerland) for �his development of nuclear magnetic resonance spectroscopy for determining the three-dimensional structure of biological macromolecules in solution.� The work of the laureates has helped researchers to quickly determine the composition of biological macromolecules, such as proteins, and understand their function in the cell. �The methods have revolutionized the development of new pharmaceuticals.� Medicine: Sydney Brenner (UK), H. Robert Horvitz (U.S.), and John E. Sulston (UK) for �their discoveries concerning genetic regulation of organ development and programmed cell death.� The laureates have �have identified key genes regulating organ development and programmed cell death and have shown that corresponding genes exist in higher species, including man.� Economics: Daniel Kahneman (U.S.) for �having integrated insights from psychological research into economic science, especially concerning human judgment and decision-making under uncertainty,� and Vernon L. Smith (U.S.) for �having established laboratory experiments as a tool in empirical economic analysis, especially in the study of alternative market mechanisms.� 2001 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: United Nations and Kofi Annan, secretary-general of the UN, were cited �for their work for a better organized and more peaceful world.� Literature: Sir V. S. Naipaul (UK) �for having united perceptive narrative and incorruptible scrutiny in works that compel us to see the presence of suppressed histories.� Naipaul explores alienation and the hardships of postcolonial countries in his works of fiction, nonfiction, and the occasional blend of the two. Physics: Wolfgang Ketterle (Germany), Eric A. Cornell, and Carl E. Wieman (both U.S.) �for the achievement of Bose-Einstein condensation in dilute gases of alkali atoms, and for early fundamental studies of the properties of the condensates.� In discovering the Bose-Einstein condensate, a new state of matter, the laureates have explained �the secrets of the microworld of quantum physics.� Chemistry: One-half jointly to William S. Knowles (U.S.) and Ryoji Noyori (Japan) �for their work on chirally catalyzed hydrogenation reactions,� and one-half to K. Barry Sharpless (U.S.) �for his work on chirally catalyzed oxidation reactions.� They �have opened up a new field of research in which it is possible to synthesize molecules and material with new properties.� Medicine: Leland H. Hartwell (U.S.), R. Timothy Hunt, and Paul M. Nurse (both UK) for their discoveries of �key regulators of the cell cycle.� Their discoveries concerning control of the cell cycle �may in the long term open new possibilities for cancer treatment.� Economics: George A. Akerlof, A. Michael Spence, and Joseph E. Stiglitz (all U.S.) for �their analyses of markets with asymmetric information.� �The laureates' contributions form the core of modern information economics.� __________________ Thanked 3,030 Times in 762 Posts 2000 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: Kim Dae Jung, president of South Korea, was cited �for his work for democracy and human rights in South Korea and in East Asia in general, and for peace and reconciliation with North Korea in particular.� Literature: Gao Xingjian (China) �for an oeuvre of universal validity, bitter insights, and linguistic ingenuity, which has opened new paths for the Chinese novel and drama.� His first novel, Soul Mountain, recounts impressions from journeys in remote districts in China, and his second, One Man's Bible, draws on his experiences as a political activist during China's Cultural Revolution. Physics: One-half jointly to Zhores I. Alferov (Russia) and Herbert Kroemer (U.S.) �for developing semiconductor heterostructures used in high-speed- and opto-electronics,� and one-half to Jack S. Kilby (U.S.) �for his part in the invention of the integrated circuit.� Alferov and Kroemer's inventions led to the development of fast transistors, which are used in radio link satellites and mobile telephone base stations. Kilby contributed to the development of the microchip, the basis of all modern technology. Chemistry: Alan J. Heeger, Alan G. MacDiarmid (both U.S.), and Hideki Shirakawa (Japan) �for the discovery and development of conductive polymers.� Conductive polymers are plastics that can conduct electric current. They are used in antistatic substances for photographic film and in shields for computer screens against electromagnetic radiation. Medicine: Arvid Carlsson (Sweden), Paul Greengard, and Eric Kandel (both U.S.) �for their discoveries concerning signal transduction in the nervous system.� Their findings have led to the development of new drugs to treat neurological and psychiatric diseases. Economics: James J. Heckman and Daniel L. McFadden (U.S.). �To James Heckman for his development of theory and methods for analyzing selective samples and to Daniel McFadden for his development of theory and methods for analyzing discrete choice.� The laureates have developed methods that are widely used in the statistical analysis of individual and household behavior within the social sciences. 1999 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: Doctors Without Borders, a French-based global organization. Since 1971 it has provided emergency medical assistance to populations plagued by violence and brutality in more than 80 countries. Said the Nobel Committee, �Each fearless and self-sacrificing helper shows each victim a human face, stands for respect for that person's dignity and is a source of hope for peace and reconciliation.� Literature: G�nter Grass (Germany), �whose frolicsome black fables portray the forgotten face of history.� Grass, whose novel The Tin Drum (1961) brought him world renown, writes fiercely and eloquently about the anguish of war and reunification in his native Germany. Physics: Gerardus 't Hooft (Netherlands) and Martinus J. G. Veltman (Netherlands). According to the Academy, the two researchers have �placed particle physics theory on a firmer mathematical foundation.� The researchers' theory links electromagnetic and �weak� interactions�the process which produces nearly all of the sun's energy. Chemistry: Ahmed H. Zewail (Egypt and U.S.) who has created the world's fastest camera, which captures atoms in motion much as a slow-motion replay captures a sporting event. The academy stated that his contributions �have brought about a revolution in chemistry and adjacent sciences.� Medicine: Dr. G�nter Blobel (Germany and U.S.), who was honored by the Academy �for the discovery that proteins have intrinsic signals that govern their transport and localization in the cell.� Economics: Robert A. Mundel (U.S.), a Columbia University economist, for his work on monetary dynamics and optimum currency areas. The Academy stated Mundel �has established the foundation for the theory that dominates practical policy considerations of monetary and fiscal policy in open economies.� 1998 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: John Hume and David Trimble (both Northern Ireland), whose efforts made possible Northern Ireland's Good Friday peace accord in 1998 and have led to political progress in a deep-rooted conflict. Hume is the leader of the Catholic Social Democratic and Labor Party, and Trimble heads the predominant Protestant Ulster Unionist Party. Literature: Jos� Saramago (Portugal), who, according to the committee, �with parables sustained by imagination, compassion, and irony, continually enables us once again to apprehend an elusory reality.� The first Portuguese writer to win the Nobel, his novels have been translated into more than 20 languages. Physics:Robert B. Laughlin (U.S.), Horst L. St�rmer (Germany), and Daniel C. Tsui (U.S.), �for their discovery of a new form of quantum fluid with fractionally charged excitations.� The findings of the three scientists will have implications on our understanding of the destruction of Earth's ozone layer. Chemistry: Walter Kohn (U.S.) and John A. Pople (U.K.) for their developments in the study of the properties of molecules and the chemical processes in which they are involved. Kohn's density-functional theory simplifies the mathematical explanation of the bonding between atoms within molecules, making it possible for scientists to study large, complex molecules. Pople was cited for his development of computer techniques that make it possible to create models of chemical reactions that cannot otherwise be recreated in the laboratory. Medicine: Robert F. Furchgott, Louis J. Ignarro, and Ferid Murad (all U.S.) for discovering that nitric oxide acts as a signal in the cardiovascular system. Their findings are relevant to the function of the recently popular anti-impotence drug Viagra, and will also have implications for the treatment of heart disease, shock, and other medical conditions. Economics: Amartya Sen (India), �for his contributions to welfare economics.� His studies, including an examination of the Bangladesh famine of 1974, have contributed to the understanding of how complex economic factors relate to famine and poverty. The committee credited him for �restoring an ethical dimension to the discussion of vital economic problems.� 1997 Nobel Prize Winners Peace: International Campaign to Ban Landmines (founded 1992) and Jody Williams (U.S.) for their work to ban and remove antipersonnel landmines worldwide. The Committee lauded their success in developing a �process which in the space of a few years changed a ban on anti-personnel mines from a vision to a feasible reality.� Literature: Dario Fo (Italy) for his work as a satirical dramatist, director, and actor. �With a blend of laughter and gravity, he opens our eyes to abuses and injustices in society and also the wider historical perspective in which they can be placed,� the Committee said. Physics: Steven Chu, William D. Phillips (both U.S.), and Claude Cohen-Tannoudji (France) for developing a method to cool and trap atoms using light from lasers. The discovery could lead to more accurate atomic clocks for use in space navigation. Chemistry: Paul D. Boyer (U.S.), Jens C. Skou (Denmark), and John E. Walker (U.K.) for their discoveries about a molecule that allows the human body to store and transfer energy between cells. Skou received half the prize money for his discovery of an enzyme that works with adenosine triphosphate (ATP) to regulate levels of potassium and sodium in cells. Boyer and Walker shared the other half for their discovery of the process that creates ATP. Medicine: Stanley B. Prusiner (U.S.) for his discovery of a new type of germ, called prions, that causes degenerative brain disorders, including �mad cow� disease. Critics conceded the existence of prions, but not that they cause disease. Economics: Robert C. Merton and Myron S. Scholes (both U.S.) for developing a formula that determines the value of stock options and other derivatives. (`'�.�(`'�.� �.�'�) �.�'�) �`'�.�.�THE END�.�.�'�� (�.�'�(�.�'� `'�.�)`' �.�) __________________ ஜ иστнιπg ι� ιмթΘรรιвlε тσ α ωιℓℓιиg нєαят ஜ The Following User Says Thank You to Sureshlasi For This Useful Post:

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This year was the first in its 45 year history that Jerry Lewis did not host the annual labor day telethon, which raises money for which charity (2.45 billion to date)?

Jerry Lewis: I'd smack Lindsay Lohan in the mouth – The Marquee Blog - CNN.com Blogs May 25, 2013 at 6:07 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply water softening Fantastic put up, very informative. I wonder why the opposite specialists of this sector don't understand this. You should proceed your writing. I am sure, you have a huge readers' base already!|What's Going down i am new to this, I stumbled upon this I have discovered It positively useful and it has aided me out loads. I hope to give a contribution & assist different customers like its aided me. Great job. April 5, 2012 at 4:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Breann Qadeer You are really a good webmaster. The web site loading pace is incredible. It sort of feels that you are doing any distinctive trick. Furthermore, The contents are masterpiece. you've performed a wonderful task on this subject!How to Deposit a Check´s last [type] ..1 December 13, 2011 at 4:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SymbolCrash December 28, 2010 at 11:49 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply pat Jerry Lewis has only one claim to fame – MS telethon – and he will try to keep that as long as possible because he has NOTHING else. Him calling MS children "My kids" makes me want to barf. He has never been much good at anything and never will be. Wonder how all that money is spent. People send it in hoping to help with MS but I would like a good accounting of where the money goes. I never donate though because I can't stand Jerry Lewis. October 10, 2010 at 2:44 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Myome He's got a point, even if he is somewhat nuts. Both those girls won't live to see his age if they keep living the way they are now. Maybe they should give me their money and live like me...that would be real humbling. September 28, 2010 at 2:35 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Nancy September 27, 2010 at 1:09 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ed Thomas, Wisconsin September 26, 2010 at 6:58 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply TOM September 26, 2010 at 11:22 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply harvey pearl Leave Lindsey Lohan alone you opinionated morons. She is a young girl who is in need of therapy not ridicule and certainly not jail as that jerk judge seemed to think. She is suffering from a disease and from what I see she is trying to cure herself and it is not easy. September 25, 2010 at 7:33 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mrc Shows you how far we've fallen when Jerry Lewis makes more sense than any other public figure. September 25, 2010 at 12:26 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply opinionated That's a crude remark. At the same time, these girls have too much money, time and freedom. They are just a waste of lives that could count for so much more in this world. It is sad. What kind of world makes them celebrities?? September 23, 2010 at 10:33 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Master Well let me know if slavery or child labor does make a comeback, I have a field of cotton that needs pickin and I also need some clothes sewn together. Thanks September 23, 2010 at 7:13 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Izzy I often wonder what would happen if the media refused to report on the antics of the likes of Paris Hilton and Lindsey Lohan. While Jerry Lewis used a poor choice of words, his theory is right on the money. September 23, 2010 at 4:48 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Cynical Randy So, she gets popped in the mouth, Jerry.....who popped you when you were a percocet junkie??? Frankly, both of ya can go....only the French think you're funny! September 23, 2010 at 2:49 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jack Good to hear from someone like Jerry who despite his imperfections, which we all have, recognizes a spoiled brat when he hears about one. He's done more for people with disabilities than Lohan and her idiot likely to die young friends ever will. September 21, 2010 at 11:34 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply PAT JERRY LEWIS IS JUST TRYING TO GET SOME ATTENTION – LIKE HE DOES WITH THE MD TELETHON. HE NOT ONLY IS A HAS BEEN – HE IS A NEVER WAS. I NEVER DONATE TO THE MD TELETHON JUST BECAUSE OF JERRY LEWIS September 21, 2010 at 9:56 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MickeyMudTurtle What would he do if he started in, and then discovered that she was wearing no knickers? September 16, 2010 at 4:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply oneStarman September 12, 2010 at 10:33 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Karen Right ,please act indignant. Ask Gary Lewis what kind of father Jerry was. Oh, gosh Jerry...didn't you have a severe drinking problem most of your life? September 10, 2010 at 11:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply rightonjerry Right on Jerry Lewis! And after Jerry smacked that spoiled brat, then I'd smack her even harder. September 8, 2010 at 11:14 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply andy i agree,maybee a good slap to the face would help these spoiled "celebs" should the same jail time as anyone else 13 days?and she crying about it with her past offences she should go for a couple years."i thought it was gum"?cocaine and gum not so much alike and who stuffs gum in a lipstick case stupid stupid stupid September 7, 2010 at 7:12 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply exihippie those girls / lindsay lohan andparis hilton are sad examples and shouldn,t be looked up bt young girls.both of their parents should be ashamed of the way the raised their children, its not all the parents vault though , those girls arenot children anymore and should take responsibility for the actions. both are poor examples of the adults.who are not grownup enough but act like children , spoiled brats. September 7, 2010 at 6:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mike d It seems when you reach that certain age you lose that part of the brain that filters out things you say. September 7, 2010 at 2:25 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply the_dbs September 7, 2010 at 12:01 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Teresa Hey Doug, Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis are dead. Did they post something from the grave that I haven't seen? Everyone knows Jerry is right! Not all, but most young kids today are just plain stupid because they emulate what they see on TV. All parents who are not good role models, and ALL producers of reality shows should be smacked in the mouth also!!! There are so many more to mention, but the list is just too long. September 7, 2010 at 9:41 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ronniesue WoW!!!! Maybe she should trade places with Jerrys Kids and see how easy life is. Or maybe she could go to her MUD HUT and cry herself to sleep laying on a dirt mat with nothing to eat, drink or alchol to abuse. We love you Jerry!!! September 7, 2010 at 8:24 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Andromeda I'm not smacking anyone who is walking down the street minding their own business, but anyway, I have to say I have a more negative view of Paris Hilton than I do of Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay to me seems troubled, but Paris is a bad seed... Paris is a bad person. September 7, 2010 at 6:28 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply J.M. Synge Here's an old quote by Elliott Gould about Jerry Lewis: "Lewis used to be one of my heroes... but through the years, I've seen him turn into this arrogant, sour, ceremonial, piously chauvinistic egomaniac. I'm just amazed at his behavior. September 7, 2010 at 6:21 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Doug Schrecengost Jerry Lewis is an old ugly freak that is now getting fresh attention by using Lindsy Lohan's life. Jerry Lewis and his comments are a joke. Lindsy Lohan is doing fine, and she doesn't need the ugly guy hanging on her coat strings for attention. Use you eyes people. I would slap the taste out of his wanna be mouth is I were Lindsy Lohan, but I'm not here, so I won't presume to speak for her. I'm confident she will show more class and shine this dope on. September 7, 2010 at 3:25 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply G September 6, 2010 at 5:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ANDY September 6, 2010 at 5:04 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Anonymous He was brought up the old fashioned way just as a lot of us were and that we did not let our kids get away with such bad behavior. If her parents did smack her on the rear end and teach them right from wrong when they were little they would not be in trouble today. Love you Jerry. Almost forgot its Labor Day the MDA telethon guys, he needs us to help his kids so call in and pledge I did. September 6, 2010 at 4:36 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Steven Holloway I've got a $1000.00 that says Ms. Lohan can kick the old mans sorry ass. Jerry thank you for the wonderful things you have done for the kids with M.D. but please keep your mouth shut. You have never met this young lady. Why would you want your legasy to be that of a Creap ? September 6, 2010 at 3:56 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Robert I think Jerry has been talking to Francis the talking mule.... If Dean Martin was here he wouldn't say that I bet. September 6, 2010 at 2:39 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply phil If he meets Lindsay and punches here he should go to jail for battery which is more serious than any crime Lindsay was already punished for. September 6, 2010 at 2:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ChollyGee Jerry's back for his annual Guilt-a-Thon where he has to have raised one trillion dollars for as long as he has held this thing and yet I never hear of breakthroughs in MD. Jerry's just glad to be able to hear the question, and that someone asked what he thinks. LL is screwed up, but turning back time is more in Jerry Lewis' interest than anyone elses. Glaven!! September 6, 2010 at 2:26 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Chris I agree with Jarry. Lindsey is a spoiled, clueless, self absorbed little brat desparately in need of a swift kick in the butt. September 6, 2010 at 2:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Joel WHAT THEY DON'T HAVE THEY TELETHON ANYMORE BECAUSE PEOPLE FINALLY GOT TIRED OF SUPPORTING JERRY LEWIS' DRUG AND ALCOHOL. SURE HE GAVE SOME OF THE MONEY TO M.D.A. BUT EVERYONE KNOW HE POCKETED A LOT MORE THEN HALF THE MONEY RAISED SO HE DID NOT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING BUT THE TELETHONS ALL YEAR. September 6, 2010 at 2:00 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Johnny September 6, 2010 at 1:32 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply AngieIA And I'd kick Jerry Lewis in the nuts. This guy is a hack. God bless him for the work w/ Muscular Dystrophy. He can shove everything else where the sun doesn't shine. From a man who literally left one of his own sons behind, he has no room to talk on proper parenting or appropriate behavior. September 6, 2010 at 1:07 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jamie dunlap i think they should send lindsey lohan to afganistan for two years and make her work her sentence off there. use her as a cook or as a nurses aid. September 6, 2010 at 12:01 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jag Jerry lost a child to drug use, maybe he could have worded it differently, I'm sure he would love to smack his own kids in the mounth but he is gone. All drug users should think before they leave their parents to grow old and out of touch like Jerry. Get your help now and clean up your act..Jerry did but lost his tolerence. September 6, 2010 at 10:07 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply fernando September 6, 2010 at 9:27 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply JLS He's completely irrelevant. Who cares what this old geezer says? I thought he died a year ago. September 6, 2010 at 7:18 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Joeshmoe September 6, 2010 at 6:58 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Joeshmoe I really do not think he would actually smack these brats. He is just stating a point, "They need to be set straight" every comes down from the top, and it is their parents fault for letting them get that way, rich and spoiled. "TOO SPOILED" is that comparable to the too big "businesses" that cannot be corrected? shes a drug abuser, and do you think a couple weeks, and a frenzy of media, and getting paid big bucks for a photo shoot is going to help the warped brain? NOT, its going to be "Train Kept-A-Rollin...all night longggggg...".........eeerrrrkkkkkkkkk WRECK!!! Oldretirednurse has a good point, theyre going to end up ruining their bodies eventually, and it'll be /cryyyy why meeee whyyy meee. they brought it on themsselves and couldnt wake up to the real world where life is not a bullet train. it's going to take something tragic to wake these people up. Question is to them, do you really want to shorten your life that bad? and POSSIBLY someone elses? dont bother replying, Im not going to read it. September 6, 2010 at 6:57 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Joe Jeeze, Jerry Lewis ia an angry man. I guess that comes from acting a "fool" in so many roles, then he got branded a fool, now he's angry with the world. He's disgusting, always was. Shoot yourself, old man. So you're a woman beater too. You've got zero going for you, idiot. September 6, 2010 at 6:44 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ann When is violence the answer to anything. Mr. Lewis has lost my respect. MD might consider a new spokesperson. September 6, 2010 at 6:25 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply viewsUcanuse actually, if you're wasted enough, autopsy's are kick ass to watch! just like adult swim on cartoon network. & that's all for viewsUcanuse. See you next time. September 6, 2010 at 4:43 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ShellieJ I support Mr Lewis completely. Celebrities are treated as 'the untouchables' of society and seemingly get away with what the 'normal public' would not. How were they ever placed on such a high pedestal? The Bible talks about sparing the rod and spoiling the child. Gee- I wonder why? What kind of a Father would God be to create a world and its inhabitants and not provide an operator's manual or guide? Well, folks, the handwriting's on the wall. Breakdown of society stems from not following the principles written in that manual. By the way, I'd rather listen to someone who's had a 'history,' as many claim Lewis had, rather than one who hasn't. When someone speaks from experience, I listen and it sticks. Don't counsel me unless you've been there and know about which you speak. Ohhh, Lindsay!... Paris!... et al- where are you? Now, where did I leave that strap? September 6, 2010 at 4:34 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply chris September 6, 2010 at 4:22 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sean Theres bigger mistakes in the world Jerry that you can speak out against, such as the mickey mouse wars in the east. What Lindsay does is her business and to justify smacking people because one does not like X Y Z. Who gives a toss about Lindsay. If people really care, they should speak out against sanction murder in the east. Lindsay Lohan, give me a break. September 6, 2010 at 3:56 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Scott in LA How about smacking her parents so hard that she feels it? Her mother had her out partying the night before a court appearance that they ended up showing up late to. The father is no better. A bit of of tough love and true parenting would have created a foundation the prevent some of her acting out. The coutrts have tried to smack Lindsey often enough and she still does not get it. How about we just choose to ignore her completely (i.e. total media embargo) and see if that does not straighten her and her family out? September 6, 2010 at 12:33 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Dennis 2547 In all the years I have followed Mr. Lewis' telethon. He has been steadfast in his beliefs. Bravo for telling like it is and how you see the situation. Heck, when I was a kid growing up I had neighbor's that, if you did something wrong, oh boy, lookout. They would tell your parents. We had huge extended families. Your nuclear family with Uncle's and Aunt's and not to leave out the neighbor's and close friends. Nothing was worse than having your parents say, I heard today from Mr. or Mrs. that you did this or said this. Boy, that was a sure fire way to get grounded, sent to your room, or not allowed to use your bicycle, etc. Good luck Miss Lohan. I think I have said before many times that boycotting her films would send a very clear and loud message. A retired US Army veteran September 6, 2010 at 12:19 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Carlos Jerry Lewis is so old he couldn't smack a piece of gum! He just wants to finally get his wrinkled hand on a hot behind!!! LOL! September 6, 2010 at 12:18 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jonny We have to also remember that Jerry is from a period of time when the studios protected stars and hid all of their wrongdoings from the press. Nowadays celebrities do not have that luxury, and sometimes the road like the one Lindsay is on is what she needs to put her life into prospective. They always say you have to hit rock bottom before you can recover. In Jerry's time the studio used you up until they couldn't make another dollar out of you and threw you away. Judy Garland was a prime example. The studios put her on speed to lose weight, then uped the dosage to keep her filming movies and gave her parents downers to make her sleep. This was confirmed by countless people at the studios, including her frequent costar Mickey Rooney. It led her to a life of addiction and tragedy, all because the studio knew she could make them some money. Sad, really and we as the audience just screamed for more. September 5, 2010 at 11:58 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply paulm5545 September 5, 2010 at 11:49 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mark Hey Jerry, what about when you insulted your camerman and his son when you called the son "an illiterate F-got" during the MDA telecon!! September 5, 2010 at 10:50 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Natch Jerry ought to feature this as part of his telethon! Right after you bring the firefighters on, have LiLo walk on stage, start talking (babbling), and then have Jerry walk over and smack her in the mouth!! He's guaranteed to get $10 million more than ever before!! September 5, 2010 at 10:12 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Karen This coming from a father who cheated on his children's mother and didn't have anything to do with their upbringing. Talk to Gary Lewis about his "Wonderful" Dad! September 5, 2010 at 9:49 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Kirk Another angry old fat Jewish guy, that some young hot chic is really not going to care about. September 5, 2010 at 9:16 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Los Angeles Yea Jerry's Kids!!!! Someone needs the smack the sh!t out of the hysterical wh0re!!! What do Lindsay Lohan and Jerry Lewis have in common? They're both going to be dead in 2011. 2011 Celebrity Deathwatch Top 10.... September 5, 2010 at 8:37 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply kingGeeGeeGee September 5, 2010 at 6:48 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jsz Did you know that jerry ones did it with a thirtheen year old! so I dont think he's the one to say anything September 5, 2010 at 6:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Johnny B September 5, 2010 at 6:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply KEVIN I'd punch Jerry Lewis in the mouth if I ever saw him, just for being another ignorant arrogant fossil, and I never layed a hand on ANYONE EVER including my kids. September 5, 2010 at 5:43 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ficheye I would rather watch a Jerry Lewis movie than a Lindsay Lohan movie, as flawed as he is. And let's not forget, he's not doing anything that these girls aren't doing.... getting publicity for doing something outrageous... there's good money in it. September 5, 2010 at 4:40 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sacha September 5, 2010 at 4:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jim September 5, 2010 at 4:01 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply shonti I don't know either Lindsay Lohan or Paris Hilton so all I can give is my personal opinion based on media reports. They seem to be spoiled brats who expect to be allowed to behave badly and then expect to get bailed out every time. Poor little rich kids. No sympathy for either of them. However, LL has talent, PH is a no-talent socialite. A message for Jerry Lewis – I can understand the impulse but smacking doesn't help. September 5, 2010 at 3:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mike I'd seriously like to see that. LiLo would stomp Jerry into a paste, he has no idea what he's messin wit. September 5, 2010 at 3:46 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply clint Go for it punk , make my day, just remember this had gun is a 44 magnum. Put your big foot in your mouth so I can blow you and all the other smakers to hell, or a good old Texas prayers meeting. The telethon is just to relieve Jerry's conscience for the jerk he is. September 5, 2010 at 3:40 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply yummygal but but but if paris and lindsey don't have cocaine on them at all times... who will hang out with them? 😛 September 5, 2010 at 3:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Alexis It's sorry that Lewis has to be so passive aggressive with his unrealisstic, unattainable lust for Lindsey that he has to go to this depth to garner even a sliver of her attention. NO, I am not a Lindsey fan, nor am I a Lewis fan. But I certainly recognize a cry for attention when I see one. Poor Lewis. September 5, 2010 at 3:16 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply LEE What makes Jerry Lewis father of the year. The man had a child with a lover while married to his first wife. He refuses to accept her into his family. The man is a loser. September 5, 2010 at 3:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Loud Noises!!! September 5, 2010 at 3:09 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply PAMOM She DOES deserve a kick in the butt, however, how many people remember when Jerry Boy himself was a boozer user himself?! A little humility, please.... September 5, 2010 at 1:59 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lydia Some of you are totally letting Jerry Lewis off the hook! Come on; maybe the guy made funny movies, but like most movie stars, they are ACTING on the screen. They are all different in "real" life. My Aunt happened to see Mr. Lewis, his 4 boys and first wife here in San Diego back in the early 1960's at a restaurant near where he kept his boat. Jerry Lewis was rude and abusive to his wife and kids IN FRONT OF THE PEOPLE AT THE RESTAURANT. So stop putting him on some angelic pedestal. Lohan has real problems, heaven knows. Hitting ANYONE is no solution........ever. September 5, 2010 at 1:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lydia Mr. Lewis is a bully and a hateful guy; just ask his boys from his first marriage. Yeah, he WOULD smack Lohan. Let's just call him another Mel Gibson and be done with it. These type of men, who think hitting is just fine, are cowards. They are used to being catered to, adored (at least by the French), and expect to get their way. For all the good that Mr. Lewis has done, shame on him for being a bully and self-righteous. And Lohan is a spoiled brat and probably only a bit more mature than her parents. So? Movie stars have been catered to for ages; it keeps health professionals working. September 5, 2010 at 1:08 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply BARBWIRE Gee Jerry...how did that work for you. As I remember your children spoke of the abuse they received at your hands...one even committed suicide (if I remember correctly). As soon as they were grown they cut you out of their lives.....so even tho their parents aren't doing a good job....your way doesn't seem to work either. They needed parents, who from the start taught them not to abuse their privilaged lifes....and how to give back (not just money which is the hollywood way but time and caring). At their age only THEY can change their life....and life is giving them the slaps they need. September 5, 2010 at 11:52 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mr Mel The best way to handle these spoiled children is to stop supporting their careers. Don't go to see them, don't buy anything they flack and teach them that they owe the rest of us respect or they won't see our money. When Tiger Woods lost his Buick sponsorship it was a large financial blow and his game is suffering. September 5, 2010 at 11:33 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply OnJerrysSide Jerry is absolutely right!! and it all goes double for me! I'd have been so ashamed I couldn't show my face ever again in public. Never have seen the inside of a jail except to work there, and neither have my children! September 5, 2010 at 11:16 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply CFT The antics of Lindsay & Paris are staged. Each pay for a publicest to keep them in the news. They need the publicity to pay the bills for their extravegant lifestyles. Jerry Lewis, CNN & Showbiz Tonight pay homage as Hollywood feeds on itself. September 5, 2010 at 10:46 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply NM September 5, 2010 at 9:54 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply bs Guess he never slapped his buddy Dean for being messed up most of the time....how easy it is for people to talk about others.....maybe some of u a holes could sale the secret of being perfect.... September 5, 2010 at 9:42 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Person September 5, 2010 at 7:59 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Steven R. What Lindsay and Paris need is not to be smacked but to be ignored. Can you imagine how upset Lindsay would be if she showed up for a court date and there were NO CAMERAS! She'd cry some real tears then. September 5, 2010 at 5:05 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Calvin Hobbes September 5, 2010 at 2:35 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sterling Has this schmuck ever done anything, I mean ANYTHING, that wasn't self-promoting and self-aggrandizing? I pity Muscular Distrophy for not having a better spokesman at this point than this mean-spirited egotist. September 5, 2010 at 1:11 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Dead Martin Jerry, here's wishing you another 84 years. As to those of you who have nothing good to say about the man: you will all eventually die from syphilis, gonorrhea, or chlamydia. Have a good one. Sodomites. September 4, 2010 at 9:56 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mina Lewis has been around for a long time, and very much from the capital punishment generation, so it is understandable he would be thinking this way at his age and senility. Ask him what meds he takes. Not being a shrink I don't think his idea is all to good. Lohan is headed for a self destruct completely opn her own and theres no stopping it. She doesn't want to be here anymore. When that happens her blood sucking parents can enjoy her riches without the hassle of little Lindsay to make excuses or blame, sorry ass parents that they are.The most recent baby stroller thing is in my opinion hype, from the only insane asylum with out a fence around it "Hollywood". What I see is an illegal invader pushing a white baby, on a public street. That's it! Maybe she was surprised by Lohan's car passing too close or maybe she just like expensive cars. I think Lindsay is surrounded by parasites and really needs a friend who doesn't want anything in return but to help her. This poor kid is really f'd up. September 4, 2010 at 9:05 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Frank "at his age and senility. Ask him what meds he takes." LOL! September 4, 2010 at 9:32 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ray Jerry is right, she should be smacked! I wouldn't mind punching her in the mouth myself! What a low-life wench she is! September 4, 2010 at 8:48 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tsisi I have to say that, yes, let's stop putting on blinders, being PC, and say it how we mean it. I am sick to death of people's excuses and justification for walking the wrong path. However, I think it's time for us to really call addiction what it is, a disease. September 4, 2010 at 8:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MrsFudd This girl needed to be disciplined as a child. It is obvious that Lohan has no idea what boundaries are, how to exercise self control, and respecting other people. She is indeed the typical spoiled Hollywood brat who had stupid, star-struck parents. Sure her dippy parents are to blame for some of this, but Lindsay is 24 years old and old enough to know the difference between right and wrong. Lewis got the location wrong, however. Lindsay Lohan needs to be slapped upside the head, not across the mouth. September 4, 2010 at 8:27 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Wayne Our society has declined into one where no one is at fault for their mistakes. Political Correctness run amuck! It may be old school thinking, but once you're an adult, it's up to you make the right decisions. Jerry is right in a sense, quit showing pity to adults who screw up, punish them and they'll act right or go through life being miserable. The final choice is theirs. September 4, 2010 at 8:26 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Michael Tatz [use "MICHAEL" ONLY] Mr. Lewis has done marvelous fundraising work for over 50 years. It is a shame that some individuals find a need to stir-up trouble the weekend of the Muscular Dystrophy Telethon. September 4, 2010 at 8:14 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Peaclver I think the best ting we can do to Lohan, Paris and the like, is to ignore anything they do or put out as entertainment. When they are no longer popular, maybe they will change their act. September 4, 2010 at 7:45 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tonyspeak Well, of course Jerry is right. Our wonderful Jewish Grandpa! BUT it's all media driven! Her "career" is to act a fool! So we can watch! And talk trash about her. The media, even serious media, is degenerating to mere gossip and foolishness. Tea Party, Paris Hilton, all this junk in our trunk! September 4, 2010 at 7:35 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Buck September 4, 2010 at 7:24 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Scootsy September 4, 2010 at 7:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Carolae Spoiled brats....attention getters....that's all they are. Give them several rolls in the movies and the young kids go gaga over them. They are certainly NOT what I would call roll models. It would serve them right if they never get another chance to star in a movie/TV show again.....who needs that or them? September 4, 2010 at 7:05 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply bailoutsos Hey, if Jerry saw her in Machete, I bet he would try to hit that taco hard. September 4, 2010 at 6:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Old man Jenkins September 4, 2010 at 5:33 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply art linkletter September 4, 2010 at 4:37 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply magnus Jerry is right. Lohan and Paris are a mess. I can"t understand why the media is fasinated with them either, which is part of the problem. Lohan s dad is a mess too, so the apple didn't fall far from the tree. September 4, 2010 at 4:09 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply clayton YYYESSSS! Jerry Lewis, you're my hero. I wish you could seriously smack the snot out of them 🙂 September 4, 2010 at 4:03 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Dean Martin September 4, 2010 at 4:00 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mia September 4, 2010 at 3:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Nunya No need to dirty your hands, just do the one thing she hates the most .... ignore her. September 4, 2010 at 3:05 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mach September 4, 2010 at 2:00 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mach September 4, 2010 at 1:59 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply 537543 Lindsay needs to spend a year in various war-torn, poor countries helping people who are literally starving to death, dying of disease and work from sun up to sun down to make pennies. Maybe then she would get back her humanity and realize just how damn good she has it and how she's squandering what she has. September 4, 2010 at 1:51 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply steeve-o September 4, 2010 at 1:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mike in Montana This time.., I agree with Jerry Lewis. Acting like little kids and crying for help. Maybe, the lost generation. Sad.. September 4, 2010 at 1:00 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply whoopingcough September 4, 2010 at 12:47 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply RickyLee Hey Jerry, You had a little problem with pills yourself didn't you? a little Percodan, Vicodin, you forgot about that didn't you. Who do you think you are" You think your any better than her, your a recovering addict yourself, shame on you. I'll bet your still using, only someone who is active would talk like that, your a real hypocrite!!!!!!! September 4, 2010 at 12:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply not star struck I'm with Jerry! Every time I read something about Lindsay or Paris I am SO THANKFUL for my 32 year old son who has rarely given me any reason to worry. Not only do those two girls need a trip to the woodshed, but their parents do too. They are a product of very poor parenting, too much money, and no purpose in their lives other than acting like white trash. September 4, 2010 at 12:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ukanduet Trouble with these youhg kids is this. To much coddling by parents when they were children. Given everything and never disciplined. Now they have a lot more money than they know how to handle. They have experienced everything money can buy, so they get into drugs and booze to find more pleasure. Then when they get in trouble, they buy their way out of long jail time. Probation!! What a joke. Same way with professional athletes. One day they will find them dead of an overdose in their apartment. WAY OVERPAID!! September 4, 2010 at 12:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply pdikeman September 4, 2010 at 12:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply JR He didn't make a living making fun of people with speech disabilities, he made a living being 'silly'. Talking in a funny voice isn't mocking. If he was mocking anything, it was himself. Unless you think that kids that make goofy faces and voices are also mocking? Get real. And he also spent his life working his butt off making money to help cure muscular dystrophy. I just googled the MDA telethon and this thing has been running since 1966 and he's made 2.45 BILLION. He has, however, worked on telethons for it in some fashion since 1952. Probably longer than you've been alive. So to say that he's mocking the disabled is patently untrue, and really insulting. It's fine to mock his acting ability or to dislike him as a performer. He might also be a jerk in person. But his dedication to the disabled is completely not in question. September 4, 2010 at 12:16 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Catrain Lindsey, Paris AND Jerry all need a good old fashioned come to Jesus meeting (that's an ass beating in Texas). All 3 are a disgrace and use alcohol, drugs and people. Maybe we could but them all in a box together and shuffle them off to the moon. I'm surprised Ego Jerry would set himself up for such a fire storm- he's the LAST person the finger at people. He must have needed some free advertising for his sham MDA telethon Monday. September 4, 2010 at 12:12 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Seraphimo Too late now Jerry....this should have been done to them when they were children. BTW, you should also include their hopeless parents too. I totally support the thought though! September 4, 2010 at 12:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply k50158 Uh??? Isn't Jerry Lewis a woman abuser already? I have no respect for this man, he is an idiot. September 4, 2010 at 11:59 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply BOBBY Looks like we should pray for these people including mr steve hawkins; who hate god so much for some reason? He thinks we should continue to destroy the earth, and try to move everyone 2 mars. Smart!!!... People do not realize that the devil is running things for now and speaking through these people. If you think science is the answer, it's only part of the answer. These people are in need, Like mike, joe was happy but mike was not. What is missing here; why does Amajinabad hate jews and the taliban like to murder everyone? Start praying for peace....Rev16:3. The next sign will be huge! September 4, 2010 at 11:52 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Bill Kilpatrick Jerry Lewis is just saying what most people are thinking – or saying without a camera in their face. It's not Lindsay Lohan. It's not Paris Hilton. It's the specter of someone who has so many advantages doing really dumb things and wanting sympathy or special treatment. Many parents of grown children are coming to the realization that giving their kids everything – including protection from the consequences of their foibles – is just making it easier for these children to act as if life has no consequences. Jerry Seinfeld had it right: Parents should stop solving their children's problems for them. September 4, 2010 at 11:49 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ed This only confirms for me that not giving to the bogus "Jerry's Kids" charity is a wise choice. With their bloated administrative and promotional costs, maybe 1 dollar out of 10 is actually put to use in research or treatment. This old guy was never funny in the first place, and now you can see his true nature. September 4, 2010 at 11:46 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply WoofPlustwo I used to respect you as a person, but now you feel free to recommend smacking someone in the mouth. You do not respect other human beings, and now you should not be surprised if I do not respect you. September 4, 2010 at 11:43 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Alison September 4, 2010 at 11:40 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Kate Mr. Lewis You should be ashamed of yourself and know that violance solves nothing. Drug addicts and alchoholic have an illness – no different than cancer or MD. Shame on you – you should know better. I've given to your cause in the past, never again. September 4, 2010 at 11:39 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply InuUpstate September 4, 2010 at 11:38 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lucy September 4, 2010 at 11:33 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Michael Armstrong Sr. Tx. You treasure our old values Jerry just like I do our world has gone to crap as far as morals go its sad but theres nothing you or I can do about it except try and ignore the basterds that are destroying our wonderful country and Mr. Lewis you are one of many who made America a nice place to live I know you made my life happy threw the years . September 4, 2010 at 11:26 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Daniel "Those children are begging for help." So the help you offer is to beat a woman? Thanks for the help. September 4, 2010 at 11:22 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply palomar September 4, 2010 at 11:18 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Marc from Florida Jerry was never one to hold back. So I tell my doctor, "I can't pee." He askes me, "How old are you?" I answered, "Eighty-three. He said, "You peed enough!" September 4, 2010 at 11:14 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Maggie September 4, 2010 at 11:08 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply nancy grace September 4, 2010 at 11:06 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply N.Grace September 4, 2010 at 11:03 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ER September 4, 2010 at 11:00 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Russ Jerry Lewis is F'd up. You never help anyone by smacking them. It only results in the person hating you. She has to see how her behavior is hurting her and that it is in her best interests to stop. If hitting were good therapy, every rehab clinic would be doing it. September 4, 2010 at 10:55 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Shnovie Jerry Lewis is a loser... always was and always will be... money hungry loser. he is doing nothing for MDA....except soaking up the money. screw him. September 4, 2010 at 10:55 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply kh Although I don't necessarily disagree, I wonder if some would have said the same thing about him, when he was in his 20's. September 4, 2010 at 10:46 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply L Hanson I know, let sheriff Joe take Lindsay and Paris to tent city down here in Phoenix. They could do a reality show with them called "Messed up." The first one to get it right, work their way up to a coveted position on a female chain gang, help clean up a community and may be even gain a little self respect in the process will be released and the loser will finish their full sentence. September 4, 2010 at 10:45 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply CLJ sounds like a better form of justice than either of them have received as of yet. I would love to watch them ride a bicycle to watch television or listen to a radio or power up thier cell phone lol. September 12, 2010 at 2:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply John September 4, 2010 at 10:34 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply William September 4, 2010 at 10:32 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply DP Yep, you hit someone, you go to jail. He's not telling you the formula for helping someone, he's just being crotchety. September 4, 2010 at 10:28 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Gail Snail And there are people with disabilities like MD that want to kiss Jerry Lewis on the mouth for helping them. September 4, 2010 at 10:12 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jason September 4, 2010 at 10:11 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Whocares Oh go raise some more money for your kids Jerry. Who the hell are you to tell anyone what they should do. If it weren't for your "kids" you'd be broke and nobody would listen to you. September 4, 2010 at 10:05 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Steve R Jerry must have forgot when he was in his twenties and there were women in the same situation as Lindsay and Paris, only then they were named Connie and Joey and he took full advantage of their condition and partied HARD!! Kettle calling itself black BITTER OLD MAN!, It's hilarious how his personal life was a complete train wreck and now he's calling out kids!. Go to FRANCE, apparently when they are not surrendering they laugh at you. September 4, 2010 at 9:46 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply LMD You go Mr. Lewis!! He spoke the sentiments of many,who are tired of seeing these spoiled,overindulged,wannabe's,being part of the news on a daily basis.While I think he was also making a "figurative point vs. A physical one. As for his background and earlier life,yes he screwed up,cost him dearly in some areas,and that is why I feel he speaks out. I also believe that before Lyndsey,her mom should be the first in line for a good dope slap.And a P.S. to the media,are there not enough stories out there that the Lohans,Hilton's,Snookies etc have to be used to fill space? September 4, 2010 at 9:36 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply rdc September 4, 2010 at 9:35 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply RealMan in addition to a smack, I think a back hand would do and punch her in the stomach. September 4, 2010 at 9:32 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply PimpHand September 4, 2010 at 9:30 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MMerritt Lohan is young. She will grow out of it. Just as Lewis did? It is interesting that he is only picking on women. What about Mel Gibson, Robert Downey Jr. ,etc? September 4, 2010 at 9:28 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply John Stewart What an ass this man is. Yes, she's a messed-up, spoiled brat – but why does that give him the right to hit her? The cure for stupidity is not violence. No donation for you this weekend, Old Man.... back of the line. September 4, 2010 at 9:27 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Noneofyourbusiness Ok tcaros, we friggin get it. As for Jerry Lewis, he's just a drunk, crotchety old man. I understand him saying that, but he really needs to focus his anger at her lowlife, white trash parents. They are the branch from which this poor troubled apple grew September 4, 2010 at 9:19 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Barbara September 4, 2010 at 9:15 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Eric Nicolas This is the guy who said he doesn't like female comedians because all the time they're performing he keeps thinking about how they are a "vessel of life". Their reproductive organs seem to get in the way of their being funny. He is a clown in more ways than one. September 4, 2010 at 9:08 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ike Abootment September 4, 2010 at 9:03 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply musicallyinclined Wow. I agree with him, completely. I'm 22 years old, and can see the lack in disrespect towards people in generations that come after me. As people give their children more and more freedom, their respect for themselves and others goes down the toilet. This was never a problem 50 years ago. I agree, times are changing, but its not for the better. I have never done the things Lindsay has done. There is no excuse for her actions and it bugs the hell out of me that people like her (celebrities) get off the hook so easy. I know if I traveled down lindsay's exact path, I'd be in jail for life. If she was smart she would take the help and move on and mature. September 4, 2010 at 9:02 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcaros There are people with disabilities that would like to smack Jerry Lewis in the mouth. He made his living by making fun of speech disability. He's a disgrace. September 4, 2010 at 9:02 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Artemis So Jerry wants to smack a young woman for behaving exactly as he and his rat pack friends did? Classy, Jerry, classy. Actually, then situation is not exactly the same. For all her problems, Lohan is not as much of an addict as Jerry and his friends, and she has more talent than Jerry could even dream of, and I'm not even a Lindsay fan. September 4, 2010 at 8:54 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Skippy HA! I do agree with Jerry Lewis that Lohan needs a good "whack" but he should be talking! He's an ex-addict and beat the CRAP out of his own kids when they were growing up and he has the nerve to judge anyone else? He's the front-man for Jerry's Kids but he's the Poster Child for Mental Health issues! September 4, 2010 at 8:53 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Daniel Starting in childhood one must learn there are consequences for actions. Children learn that some consequences are sourr and some are sweet. As they grow they learn how to act in order to avoid the sour. September 4, 2010 at 8:38 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply bob Then you'd be charged with assault, you can't just hit a girl because you disagree with how she chooses to live her life. September 4, 2010 at 8:29 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply fanta I'm sure she's had more than that before becoming famous....she is typical of the sleazy, pampered ME generation today.....so is Hilton,et,etc,etc........these people never knew what the word struggle meant and just sleaze their way through life until B A N G one day it hits and dawns on them that those who they trusted and believed were their friends were and are just hangers on opportunists....lol.....just like them ! September 4, 2010 at 8:14 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply johnnycee Jerry is right. He knows what he's talking about. I Cr 13:8a September 4, 2010 at 8:09 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply IsisDax She's not a child. She's a woman. She's an addict. Jerry would be arrested for assault. Assaulting a person, not a female. Females count as people. And yes, he drove drunk more than today's stars ever will. He turned out to be quite a violent, dirty old man, didn't he? September 4, 2010 at 7:55 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jsalters Jerry lost my respect when he let one of his sons dye homeless on the street, I think it was in the last year or so. September 4, 2010 at 7:49 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Kyle I'm no fan of Lohan's, but it's time to put this crazy old man in a home. September 4, 2010 at 7:43 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply dennis September 4, 2010 at 7:42 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply perplexed a good whack in the chops isn't going to solve lindsay's problems. she should however have been made to serve her full sentence. it's time society got off the celebrity worship bandwagon. if you do the crime do the time just like and other ordinary individual. September 4, 2010 at 7:37 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply burger September 4, 2010 at 7:20 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mike I'm sick of her and all the others that can't control themselves. I would assume that Jerry is too. Hopefully they will go away. September 4, 2010 at 7:18 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply kazz you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • you're • September 4, 2010 at 7:16 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Terry Lohan is a spoiled &&tch. She has always had her way, and I suggest Hollywood watchers keep their black dress and suit handy for the funeral. The authorities cannot control her, how do you expect Hollywood to keep her in check? September 4, 2010 at 7:13 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Gene Where's the "Report abuse" button on the article? I'm pretty sure smacking someone in the mouth or the threat thereof is abuse. 😉 September 4, 2010 at 6:47 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jules I think these young girls have all the money they want and no real love and guidance from there parents, and if the parents are troubled from there family members. The media goes so far out of there way to make it worse on these young people, being in your face they can't live any normal life. Jerry Lewis is right smack her up side the head and yell out "SNAP OUT OF IT". But really she deserved more than what she got, she broke the law she had more than one DUI. She did a bunch of other stupid stuff. Us normal people would have to stay in jail and rehab. Not get treated like a star like they do. When you break the law you have to pay and not just say oops my bad and go back to partying. September 4, 2010 at 6:20 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply RobRoy Well when is The Great Jerry going to tell us how much his salary is for this charity of his? Something he refuses to do. To be a charitable organization you need only give 5% to charity so Jerry the clown probably keeps 95%. So give to Jerry not the kids. Suckers September 4, 2010 at 6:16 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Kathy September 4, 2010 at 5:46 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Light of Truth For Jerry Lewis: The only one who needs "help" is the wrong minded oppressive government and it's violation of a citizen's right to pursue happiness. September 4, 2010 at 5:37 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MtnDewGyrl She has all the money in the world to get help for her problems...cry me a river...I dont feel sorry for her at all...in fact, the money you refuse to get help with, offer it off to the people that actually need help and will get it...f u September 4, 2010 at 5:30 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply fenriz218 That's it! Everybody knows that there is only one way to make people decent: by hitting them hard enough and locking them away for long enough! Back to the good ol' days of parenting where a childs mind was formed with the help of a broomstick handle and a belt! But seriously: I looked grandpa up there on wikipedia. It turnes out he used to make funny faces on TV – what could have motivated an old man trying to beat up young girls that he doesn't even know? I think I smell a dirty old man ... September 4, 2010 at 5:28 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply HD Jerry Lewis. Most of the comedians out there imitate this guy and you just don't know it!! September 4, 2010 at 5:13 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jim September 4, 2010 at 5:07 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Tatawnca September 4, 2010 at 5:06 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jimmy Who does this shmuck think he is? He was never funny, now he's discusting, and has no passion for some ones misfortunes. Now he shows what phoney he is. September 4, 2010 at 5:01 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply max It seems like some folks on CNN just have it out for young people. Paint all of us with the same brush. Make references to 'kids these days have no respect for authority.' Might I point out that many people in positions of authority have no respect for young people, whether we are 'pot smoking degenerate tree huggers' or responsible upstanding members of society. We are being persecuted due to our age. To those people, I say take a look at yourselves. You guys are not DESERVING of our respect. To those who view people as equals regardless of age, race, religion or socioeconomic status, I say thank you for not lumping everyone together. I am a 24 year old father of twin boys. I respect them as my equal in humanitarian terms, and as my children who I am raising to be responsible free thinking and contributing members of society. Age doesn't matter to the extent many of you feel it does. What matters is the responsibility you take for your actions, the change you implement in your own negative lifestyle, and the knowledge you gain to make better decisions in the future. Show me some 19 year old teenage parent who doesn't have a clue what they're doing, and I'll show you a 48 year old man who is in jail for alcoholism and physically abusing his family. Age matters not. Stop writing people off. Stop lumping people together. Stop belittling today's youth. We are not entirely different from the youth of your era. September 4, 2010 at 4:58 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Thomas (Love) Jerry is simple stating the obvious. Being spoiled and idolized for beauty instead of heart/soul. This is what sells magazines and we guy it up like suckers. Meanwhile back at the ranch in some countries some poor starving none beautiful on the outside (Perhaps on the inside) is POOR and suffering with disease. Maybe Oprah can help as long as they are beautiful on the outside. Jerry does not judge the appearance. He judges the actions of the selfish. Jerry you made us laugh and you committed your life to helping the ones that need it most. While they poss for the camera you us it to bring happiness and help to the disabled and poor souls. Thanks you. Your an inspiration and others should try and do the same. September 4, 2010 at 4:38 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Tatawnca Very well said. I agree. He has done sooooo much for kids it CAN NOT be even explained in words. THANK YOU JERRY FOR HELPING OUR LITTLE CHINADOLL.... We will never forget, and I'd back you physically if they didn't let ya... Even thou I KNOW you never truly would. We love you and still have our chinadoll with us because of YOU......THANK YOU. September 4, 2010 at 4:49 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply wollf as a good man once said," let he who is without sin cast the first stone." grow up people. her life is her business not yours and nothing gives any of you the right to assault her. September 4, 2010 at 4:36 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Tatwnca Again did your MANGINA get hurt by all this... NO. Give me a break do you think Jerry would do that or even could. Chill out, look around and find that funnybone you left some where sometime ago. And get a reality check like those two girls need. After all they are in public eye and should remain role models.TRULY. September 4, 2010 at 4:43 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Tatawnca GEE JERRY, If I was you I would of took a diiferent tacktic LIKE> " Gee paris and linsey you have gotten alot of trouble and negitve public view lately"'Come be on my marathon it will be good public eye". THEN when they are on national TV let them have it. SMACK-O RIGHT IN THE KISSER. Now that would be FUNNY AS HECK>>>> lov ya jerry.....After forty years you still find ways to make me crack up truly... September 4, 2010 at 4:29 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mike haha, I'd love to see Jerry smack LiLo in the mouth. She would thrash him like a rented mule, he'd be lucky to live. September 4, 2010 at 4:28 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mitzi I love Jerry Lewis and I'm not French. He's funny and done a lot of good for people. I'm sure he wouldn't smack anyone, but is basically saying that certain people scream for discipline. Our society does not hold celebrities accountable for their actions. Sad state our society has become. September 4, 2010 at 4:11 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Kayfabe September 4, 2010 at 4:10 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Fred Barnett September 4, 2010 at 3:56 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Greg I have zero respect for what Jerry Lewis said, or says. He should mind his own business and if he doesn't have something kind or constructive to say, then keep his trap shut. Lewis got his start with Dean MArtin, for whom public intoxication (on stage and TV) was considered a fine joke. What a hypocrit. September 4, 2010 at 2:47 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Tatawnca GREG, did your mangina get hurt by that comment. OR are you one of those people that would just bash on a man that has done more for this world then your entire family gene tree will ever do. Calm down get right with jesus and realize he is just saying they need a reality check thats all..Chill out.. September 4, 2010 at 4:37 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Janet Mr. Lewis, that would be called assault and battery. I think it's time for you to be put out to pasture. September 4, 2010 at 2:42 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Scott A Well Lindsay certainly has problems, but Jerry Lewis has had his share of them too and I don't remember him saying he would've smacked himself in the mouth for them. All in all, its an old man ranting about a youngster with a carefree lifestyle. Except for Hugh Hefner, when has an old person ever said anything complimentary about a young person (who wasn't their grandchild)? September 4, 2010 at 2:33 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply dickLIcks September 4, 2010 at 2:31 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Frank Ah, lovely. A grown man talking about beating a young girl up. Jerry Lewis is disgusting. You don't talk about someone like that just because they're going through some problems. Men definitely have no business threatening women like that. His old ass probably wanted some attention and a chance to air out his S&M lust toward girls young enough to be his grandchildren. Of course Lindsay is screwed up. Still doesn't give him the right to talk about women that way. September 4, 2010 at 2:29 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Frank Ah, lovely. A grown man talking about beating a young girl up. Jerry Lewis is disgusting. You don't talk about someone like that just because they're going through some problems. Men definitely have no business threatening women like that. His old ass probably wanted some attention and a chance to air out his S&M lust toward girls young enough to be his granddaughters. September 4, 2010 at 2:26 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Frank Ah, lovely. A grown man talking about beating a young girl up. Jerry Lewis is disgusting. You don't talk about someone like that just because they're going through some problems. Men definitely have no business threatening women like that. His old ass probably wanted some attention and a chance to air out his S&M lust toward girls young enough to be his grandchildren. September 4, 2010 at 2:25 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Frankenstein September 4, 2010 at 2:20 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jim X I find it somewhat interesting that so many people here are critical of others who they know only through gossip columns or some TV show. They feel that, simply from that gossip, they know those people well enough to fix their lives while they themselves live their own empty lives to glorious perfection without a flaw to be found. It must be nice to be God and be perfect. Good luck with that. September 4, 2010 at 2:18 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jonny yes, yes please, everyone smack her! repeatedly! September 4, 2010 at 2:00 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply james hotz September 4, 2010 at 1:49 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lori Wow- This coming from a drunk pill popper who had so little respect for his mother t he sent her to a nursing home, because he didnt want her in his house because she needed a nurse to come once a day to give her a shot September 4, 2010 at 1:45 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply james hotz What this clown ment is that he'd like to have a bust in the mouth, Lindasy's bust in his mouth. September 4, 2010 at 1:45 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Skip Might be time to give Miss Lohan a break...People like Jerry Lewis might want to keep their stupid opinions to themselve...I never cared for Jerry Lewis anyway...What did he ever add to show biz?... September 4, 2010 at 1:44 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Blah Blah-Blah September 4, 2010 at 1:40 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply james cox A smack in the mouth..wont help her.....she needs help...not a smack in the mouth.....you just dont go rond hetting on wemen.......help her get thrue this......she a good person......think you.. September 4, 2010 at 1:32 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Stevo September 4, 2010 at 1:20 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Angel September 4, 2010 at 1:16 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply David Fabian I guess it is easier to smack a 100-pound woman than to take on the billion-dollar drug and media industries that promote drug use... September 4, 2010 at 1:11 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Dave September 4, 2010 at 1:06 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Southern Snow September 4, 2010 at 1:01 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply HH Ya'll are taking Mr Lewis too literal. A good smack of reality is just what they need. If your friend had a child acting like LiLo, You would tell them that she need a good smack, but no one would think you mean actually hitting them...Just hit them with a dose of reality. September 4, 2010 at 12:49 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply austinypc September 4, 2010 at 12:48 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jimdevo September 4, 2010 at 12:43 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Smackdat Source: People Magazine, Dec. 11, 1978 "One pill in the morning would take me through the day," Lewis recalls. "That helped greatly for the first four or five years. I'm not terribly clear about when I started to lose the help I was getting from one, but then it was two." Lewis probably knows that hitting people doesn't help them, but he's too much of a mess himself to cope with life. He should just avoid the spotlight and fade away like the rest of the boozing rat pack. September 4, 2010 at 12:42 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply JohnR September 4, 2010 at 12:42 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply baldman Any of ther trulely classy acts, Hepburn,(Audrey And Kate) George burns. John wayne.any acts with class would avoid this spoiled brat. You do not see Eastwood, areatha, or any that could make a movie from 4 years old till 90 years old shun these young waisted talentless people whom are distroying the guild. maybe they should worry if perents or the movie public decide to clean house. OHHOHH no more free talentless rides. September 4, 2010 at 12:37 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply QueenNativeDenverite Heck yeah Jerry!! Only PUNCH the w***e, not slap!!! Teach these nasty "women" a lesson. No class. Class died out and that's sad. September 4, 2010 at 12:36 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply dumbdumbdumbdumb Nothing like some good old women abusing talk from a dried up old fig. Way to push the abuse standard there Jerry, Im sure parents around the world should listen to you! September 4, 2010 at 12:28 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply L.Windermere September 4, 2010 at 12:27 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply james Well Jerry is going to be nuts on the Telethon this year..in a way weve never seen before. I cant wait. September 4, 2010 at 12:13 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply BootsC The lot of the (celebrities) have proven themselves to be in dire need of adult suppervision and a good a$$ woopin. And PLEASE, Miss Brewer don't feel your required to apologize for the remarks that come from the mouths of the elderly. September 4, 2010 at 12:10 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply epipsyche Jerry Lewis wasn't funny? Are you crazy? He was hilarious in the "Nutty Professor" and many, many other comedy movies. Go watch and enjoy. He was a true superstar. Lindsay Lohan has yet to prove herself. September 4, 2010 at 12:05 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Buffalo One small etiquette error: one should wear the Legion of Honor medal on a tuxedo, not the "ficelle" as shown on photo. September 4, 2010 at 12:02 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Barry Jerry should just make them sit through a couple days of continuous viewings of his typewriter routine. September 4, 2010 at 12:00 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Kerry Berger I don't condone physical punishment, but certainly Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton are overly coddled spoiled brats who probably needed more discipline when they were kids but their parents were too busy with their own lives to raise their own kids properly. Even today, the try to make excuses for the bad behavior or say they have been punished enough. Both deserve long prison sentences at hard (real) labor with 5 – 10 years of parole. Maybe then they would stop being in denial and recognize they are irresponsible individuals. September 3, 2010 at 11:50 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Marnie September 3, 2010 at 11:47 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Angelina Bravo for you Jerry! She is a spoiled brat and enough already with all these spoiled brats with no brains. She should thank God she is healthy physically – mentall is another story – and that she has god given gifts of good looks and try to do something positive with her life and be a role model for good. I'll whack the other cheek! September 3, 2010 at 11:46 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sherry I have know for years how Jerry Lewis treated his first wife AND KIDS. This is one person (he is not a man) that I cannot stand. He is sicking. How dare he say that about smacking Lohan or any other woman. He is good at that. And as for Jerry Kids, I feel sorry for them too. Those are not his kids and I hate it when the say that. He is a poor excuse for a man. Poor excuse for a father and a husband. I thought he might have changed, but as you can see, he did not change. It is in his makeup. September 3, 2010 at 11:44 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply get it? September 4, 2010 at 1:20 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply theresa September 3, 2010 at 11:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Pat September 3, 2010 at 11:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply TCVAN September 3, 2010 at 11:33 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jo I have to say, being a first, and last time poster here. This is a bizzar way to do things. They just throw your post anywhere so it looks pretty inane and points being made don't match up, and even if it looks like they do, many times they don't. Twisted! September 3, 2010 at 11:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lizzie You go Jerry! I'd smack her too... but I'm a big wuss so she'd probably beat the hell out of me. September 3, 2010 at 11:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ken You know..... I totally respect Jerry Lewis in not only his acting career but his contributions to needy children, Again, I think and I agree that kids today in america are spoiled and especially when they hold celeb status. Therefore they belive they are above the law. It is not true and should not be true! I dont know why Jerry spouted off. and again,,,,,maybe stress or something, but I agree Lohan should be treated like anyone else in the USA that get's the same ticket! DONE! She is NOT special! September 3, 2010 at 11:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jo Thank you John Hanley, for taking time out of your life to pointing out that were stupid for taking time out of our life for posting? I love when idiots do that ! September 3, 2010 at 11:24 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Alan We grew up in a time much different than today. Laws limit so much. Stay the person you are in the public eye, don't let the press pull you down... September 3, 2010 at 11:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jo I agree with the sentiment 100%. However coming from him it means nothing. His respect for women is 0. He's admited himself there are no funny female comediens. And he believes everyone knows where women belong. Please! September 3, 2010 at 11:18 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jen King Girls that are crying out for help need slapped in the mouth? What a jack ass...publicisty hunting for his upcoming telethon. Hope he trips on stage.. September 3, 2010 at 11:18 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Alan Jerry, I agree with many things you have stated. However, whether you agree or disagree with me, you have to be smart. Falling on the sword in these instances, aren't worth it. They will have to learn, the hard way. They have everything they need and their families will bail them out of any hard situation they get themselves into. So, we have to let them to, in today's world the call it, "Self expression." They are happy with it as well. We, all of us, have to choose our battles wisely. I'm not sure that this is the appropriate forum. Love ya man... September 3, 2010 at 11:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ken Okay, cut the crap.....Who cares what Jerry say's? I think the only point he was making is this..... – Stop behaving like a child and grow up! – I dont think Jerry would acually smack her in the mouth, maybe just frustration of the spoiled kids today in America – Again, if you do the crime , than do the time as I did and many others wheather you are rich or poor! = She does not deserve somethng better because she is a celb, She made a mistake and now she needs to fix her life! – Simple as that! September 3, 2010 at 11:16 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Cheryl B. I have to agree with a much earlier comment – old school has much 2 teach the self-absorbed, wasteful and abusive lifestyles Lohan and Hilton. And by the way, where is Hilton's parents? She is an adult, however it appears it is past time for an intervention (her two recent run ins over marijuana and now a felony cocaine charge in Nevada) before the young lady ends up in serious trouble. What? Her father can run a conglomerate, and her mother is well positioned, but they cannot intervene with helping their daughter adequately? Brittany's dad manned up and hat's off to him and his daughter for turning it around! Ms. Lohan – there must be, and perhaps not, someone who is close to her and cares and is not a hanger on – time to find her a stable adult influence who cares and can intervene as well. To both Ms. Lohan and Hilton – I know too many people out of work, losing their homes, living with terminal illnesses and who cannot afford the best of treatment, and I myself am a 100% service connected disabled veteran not quite able to "feed myself" the 2 weeks of the month. I am 49 now, and I have also met many people in my life, from the very rich to the very poor, and the same problems are often rife in whatever life station one has. However, a responsibility comes with privledge, or even with the lack thereof, and that is to use your abilites and opportunites and resources, whatever it is in life, to enrich your own life as well as the ones around you. Mr. Lewis – call Mr. Hilton and Ms Hilton's mother if you mean to be of genuine adult assistance, then perhaps search to find Lindsay a "family of sorts" that will step up and intervene as well and not be opportunists. Peace and good wishes to all. CB in Memphis September 3, 2010 at 11:16 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Suds You sound educated but just like Jerry it's all "merde du chien". By the way it's " where ARE Hilton's parents" not " where IS Hilton's parents". How trailerpark!! September 4, 2010 at 11:31 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Silver Turtle CB - Right on! Where WERE the parents? {not withstanding suds' "grammar nazi" comment} As to Jerry's telethon and comments that he no longer helps MD patients that aren't "cute and loveable anymore"? Sounds like all you want is to lay about and wait for a handout. I don't know why Jerry does it; I dont want to know why Jerry does it; I don't care why Jerry does it. I do know that he does it. In course of my boring life, I've had the honor of working with Jerry on local portions of his telethon in several cities [I always found a way to mesh my military postings with the telethon]. Have any of you posters taken the time from your insignificant self-important lives to even volunteer at one of the local sites? It is a standing policy that the money raised locally STAYS locally. Also, my respect for Jerry went up many years ago; when he used his telethon to blast all the people who had the means to help, but won't because they wouldn't make a profit from it. To the poster who complained that her husband wasn't being helped anymore - GET INVOLVED yourself! You can make people understand the situation better than most can. September 6, 2010 at 6:37 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jon So... Jerry Lewis didn't get enough pleasure out of beating his own kids, now he's on the prowl for others'? September 3, 2010 at 11:14 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply simon Does anyone care what this has-been comic from the 50's thinks? Geez, he hasn't been a star and someone anyone cares about in 50 years. September 3, 2010 at 11:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Haha September 3, 2010 at 10:58 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jerry wrawks! I'm *so* in line with Jerry! Bunch of sniveling babies!! Seriously, don't they have something better to do with their lives by now??? And what's up with "she survived" 13 BIG days of jail!!! Hahaha! So needs to wake up! Why do we have to be subjected to such b.s. plastered all over the media, in grocery stores, etc. Don't we Americans have some more important matters that require our energy both positive and physical, for making this world a better place??? Maybe if no one bought in to this snivel, they'd learn hey maybe I'd better look for attention, in another way! way too much importance, when there are ppl with much bigger problems, than rich babies. all done September 3, 2010 at 10:53 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SKY THEY HAVE A CRAVE THAT CANNOT BE SATISFIED. THEY ARE CRYING FOR HELP.... September 3, 2010 at 10:44 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcubed LTB-you are pathetic. It's idiots like you that have made this an unaccountable society. "It's NEVER my fault..." September 3, 2010 at 10:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply bobby cormier does anyone here really believe jer is being LITERAL rather than making a point FIGURATIVELY? haha. he often will make a controversial remark before a telethon. people will tune in and contribute. the guy's brilliant. he knows what he's doing. it would actually be great to see lindsay turn up on the telethon and then they go to a whole WWE vibe with colored lights and that guy that owns WWE. that'd light up the tote board for sure! September 3, 2010 at 10:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply lilcjoy Good for you Jerry, you have been an icon to comedy for decades. To bad these young pups don't know your movies and all. Yes, that is a true statement that you made about the "girls". September 3, 2010 at 10:30 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcubed September 3, 2010 at 10:25 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply John Hanley You all are a bunch of idiots for even spending your time writing comments to any of the stuff written here. The ego of the author who tracks what he instigates in these blogs is enormous. I'm stupid, you're stupid. Get a life. September 3, 2010 at 10:23 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Bill Jerry Lewis has been accused by both his ex-wife and his children of being physically abusive with them. He turned his back on one of his sons after the son told a tabloid what it was like growing up with daddy dearest. Jerry Lewis never spoke to him again and his son ended up dying of a drug overdose.(or was it suicide?) September 3, 2010 at 10:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply faqjerryhaters You pathetic spermballs side against Jerry, and for Lindsay Lohan? This world really is coming to an end. September 3, 2010 at 10:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply celebs shoud all die Comadre Chepa, September 3, 2010 at 10:16 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply djmarc Linday Lohan will soon be the biggest star in the world – you mark my words – & you jerry lewis are nothing but a tired old hack – all you got going for you is your telethon – an amazing thing it is – but you personally are an idiot & the fact that the french are the only ones who like you says a lot cos they are all idiots too. And another thing old man, she would kick your sorry ass! September 3, 2010 at 10:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcubed djmarc, how about I give you my address so you can kick my sorry butt. .....waiting..... September 3, 2010 at 10:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ilauria I alway enjoyed Jerry Lewis films when I was a youngster. And maybe that's what Lindsey Lohan needs but her parents should of been giving that direction years ago. It's almost to late for Lindsey and she will either die of her own abuse, or maybe, just maybe she will learn from these episodes and realize how self destructive her behaviors really are. So I think Mr Lewis needs to probably pay more attention to his own kids. I'm pretty sure his first wife Pat could have used him around more. And I think I remember a stint one of his sons did in jail. So lets not throw to many stones. September 3, 2010 at 10:13 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Steven Durham I agree with Jerry. Both Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton need to be smacked in the mouth and put in jail for at least a year. They've both thumbed their noses at the criminal justice system and don't take their treatment seriously. They are spoiled, self-centered, and socially retarded. Unfortunately they'll never change. Life for them is all about fame, drugs, money, and attention from the public. Maybe if the media and public ignored everything they did they'd go away for ever. I won't hold my breath! September 3, 2010 at 10:12 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ryan thats the 1950's for ya...if it aint workin, hit it. Hitting always fixes things. And if that doesnt work, shoot it, or bomb it. I think that sums up Jerry's comments here. September 3, 2010 at 10:08 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Steven D Ryan: Yes, the good ole days are the best and most effective way of handling worthless people like Linsay and Paris. September 3, 2010 at 10:16 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Slappy Jerry, Please take your offensive self to the old folks home and stay there. To others who agree with him: Turn in your citizenship at the border and get the hell out of the U.S. permanently please. Its time we took a stand against these morally judgmental creeps. September 3, 2010 at 10:03 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply the NEW New London guy I could go for bending Lohan over my knee and paddling her too 😉 September 3, 2010 at 9:59 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply CaptainBoston September 3, 2010 at 9:58 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply rick September 3, 2010 at 9:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Pitt Cairn I was at an AA meeting the other day, and we were talking about how folks like Paris and Lindsey show kids that you can be an alcoholic and drug addict and it's okay, because the penalties are nothing, and isn't all fun and games – like on TV? Of course, the folks we see at meetings aren't as famous and well connected, and generally don't get away with anything. And there is a real increase in those who are not just alcoholic, but have drug problems as well, since drugs are no longer a back-alley phenomenon. Unfortunately, it may take a famous person killing someone while drunk driving to change this mind-set, but I hope not. September 3, 2010 at 9:43 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Pitt Cairn September 3, 2010 at 9:46 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply drat @ Sandy.........you're full of cr*p. Lewis dumped Martin, because Martin couldn't stay sober long enough to do much of anything. It was a smart move by Lewis, so Martin wouldn't drag him down the tubes with him. Both Lohan and Hilton need a good butt smacking, nothing else has worked. September 3, 2010 at 9:39 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Gerry September 3, 2010 at 9:39 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SomeoneSaySandwich? I could get really turned on by the sight of two hot young girls - beating the crap out of Jerry Lewis. September 3, 2010 at 9:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ed Jerry Lewis should mind his own business. I read where his children said he was a failure of a father. If Jerry Lewis felt compelled to hit my child, I guarantee he would spend time getting his false teeth repaired. MIND YOU OWN BUSINESS BIGMOUTH and keep you hands to your self. September 3, 2010 at 9:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SomeoneSaySandwich? I bet Dean Martin smacked him plenty of times LOL! Why doesnt the old fart smack her father in the mouth, he's the one who deserves it. What a man – hit a woman. That's what you call picking on someone your own size ! September 3, 2010 at 9:27 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply steve The true showman, every year right before his telethon he says something outrageous, he gets more viewers and helps more people with ms, good for him work it Jerry..... September 3, 2010 at 9:23 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SomeoneSaySandwich? Here, here Mark McKee! I'd smack Jerry Lewis in the mouth for mooching off the nobility of people with disabilities and diseases, and having a massive ego-fest every year on their backs. September 3, 2010 at 9:21 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Suds What a bunch of losers (I mean those who posted not Lohen and Hilton). Lewis has far too much to say. He's just a fool who thinks because he's old people take him seriously, HA. September 3, 2010 at 9:18 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Poohpoohman I can't believe how many people think that hitting someone will fix their problems. There is already way too much violence in the world. Peace. September 3, 2010 at 9:18 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SomeoneSaySandwich? So Ol Jerry Lewis has a daughter from fooling around? LOL, I bet his wife wanted to smack HIM one when she found out. September 3, 2010 at 9:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MXD September 3, 2010 at 9:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Kado It's just talk. Hilton and Lohan deserve to be smacked but it's way too late. That was their parents' job and they didn't do it. They raised empty-headed spoiled brats. I'll say this for Lohan. I think she's an attractive, talented woman but for the fact that she is doing her best to wreck her life and die young. You can see many reasons in her young life for her being this way but, at this age, she is the only one who can change course. She needs an intensive sit-down with a Robert Downey Jr. or someone else who has had to pull himself up and SAVE himself. Hilton, on the other hand, is a waste of flesh and bone...no redeeming graces whatever. And, that greasy smear of a smile....Yeck! September 3, 2010 at 9:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lily Kado, that is the most constructive comment I've read. Lindsey is going to keep going downhill until she kills herself or someone else. Robert Downey Jr. would be good at an intervention in this case. As for Paris Hilton, it is a crime that with her advantages and wealth she she doesn't have enough heart or conscience to help and give to others. She should use someone like Princess Diana and her oldest son for examples. It's really sad to say someone is a waste of space. I hope she learns before it's too late. September 5, 2010 at 2:14 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ChoCho Yaay! I'll back Jerry Lewis! He'd slap her, and I'll kick those skinny sticks she calls legs! September 3, 2010 at 9:13 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Suds September 3, 2010 at 9:22 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Alec September 3, 2010 at 11:09 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Thomas H. September 3, 2010 at 9:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lori Ohhh, this is the funniest thing I have heard in awhile, wtg Jerry for telling it like it is, most people would do the same and with Hilton also. September 3, 2010 at 9:09 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Pratt Shut Lewis. You made your money acting like a retard and got one for a kid. That's irony. I wonder where all your telethon money goes. It certainly hasn't solved any diseases yet. September 3, 2010 at 9:07 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Poodlehopper I agree the girls are out of control, but to endorse this guy's suggestion that violence towards a person is the answer is crazy! He has a history of abuse and I cannot condone his desire in any form. I cannot imagine Jerry hitting me and it improving my judgement or lifestyle! September 3, 2010 at 9:07 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Leah I love Jerry Lewis....and with that said – evidently the parents of these two nut cases didn't have a peach tree at home that had those stinging little switches; guaranteed to make you think about whether you wanted to do right or wrong! September 3, 2010 at 8:57 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcaros Jerry Lewis made his money by imitating people with disabilities.He's a disgrace. (and don't talk about the telethons because they don't make up for it) September 3, 2010 at 8:55 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply rebecca September 3, 2010 at 8:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Petey Jerry needs to keep his mouth shut. Lohan may be a freaking joke of a disaster of a basketcase. But a gentleman does not strike a woman. No matter how much she deserves it, a gentleman does not strike a woman. Period. September 3, 2010 at 8:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Celyia Petey, you give me hope that gentlemen still exist. Thank you. 🙂 As for Jerry here, there's a difference between discipline and abuse. The desire to smack someone in the mouth and tell them that they "deserve this and nothing more" isn't about discipline or "old school" punishment, but the need to hurt someone they dislike. Considering Lewis's own history, it all comes down to him being an angry hypocrite than anything else. September 4, 2010 at 1:58 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mark i believe that paris and lindsy are not saying they are fed up but they BELIEVE that laws and rules should be bent for them because they are identified by millions and their mistakes can be viewed as well as their fame. in other words they should respect the law that applies to average people.If they delt with it very respectfully they would be and remain famous for their art and talant wich would lead others to respect their talent and not drug abuse...... September 3, 2010 at 8:51 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mark McKee Well Jerry, lucky for you that the mainstream general public has no idea of some of the unspeakable things you have done to your former "kids" once they are no longer "cute & loveable" enough to be useful to your annual ego-stroking marathon. You make Lindsey & Paris seem like Mother Theresas. If I ever see you I'd gladly put my foot up your 84 year old a$$ and be hauled off for abusing the elderly. However, I'm willing to settle for the fact that many who read this post will google up you and your telethon, and find out just what a creep you really are. September 3, 2010 at 8:43 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply LNZ Hey let all of Jerry's Kids loose on these 2 spoiled brats.....and then put all the money in their hand bags in a Jar at the 7-11...... September 3, 2010 at 8:43 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply steve And he'd be arrested for assault. The senile old fart! I don't care for her actions either but they aren't hurting me. Always easy to hit a woman I guess to snap her out of it. September 3, 2010 at 8:42 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Thomas H. Given what celebrities get for assault nowadays, I say he should go for it. Lindsay could use a royal Chris Brown-style beat down. Maybe then she'll have some sense knocked into her. September 3, 2010 at 9:14 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcubed September 3, 2010 at 10:49 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply John Yah Thomas. I'm a male too and a little bit crazy ...why dont you try to smack me as well? How many teeth do you want to keep in your mouth? September 3, 2010 at 11:00 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply LAC Well if that was an option there are a lot of people I'd be smackin in the mouth September 3, 2010 at 8:41 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mels Gibsons Just another hate statement from Jerry Lewis the JEW against these non JEWS. Google it, Jerry is a big time jew. September 3, 2010 at 8:40 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Misschameleon Jerry...so what your saying is that you feel they are crying out for help and you want to smack them around. Now, what is wrong with that comment? They may need help but violence is not the way to administer what they need. Their handlers should have the authority to remove them from the limelight so they can get the right kind of attention they NEED.Lindsay needs her folks to take an extended vacation to somewhere far away for a year or two. Now that's a good thing. All things will pass girls. September 3, 2010 at 8:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Steven September 3, 2010 at 8:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jamesnyc The only Lohan who needs beating is Michael Lohan not Lindsay. The mother should be chewed out by Dr. Phil. Lindsay doesn't need to be hit by anyone but somehow someone has got to reach through and make her realizes that she could end up hurting herself or someone else if she doens't pull it together. Some one else made an interesting point though. Why aren't the male rock stars held to the same level of scrutiny? September 3, 2010 at 8:27 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Oda Mores Jerry is on a morphine drip. He is a knowitall smartass, running at the mouth and knows little about Lindsay. Who listens to him anyway? Why bash these people when we can ignore them? O September 3, 2010 at 8:24 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply chicagoray He didn't get to be 85 and wealthy all the way through while generating billions for Muscular Dystrophy along the way by being stupid. In fact, I'd say makes him one very smart man. He might act a fool but he's not one. I know his charity as I have Multiple Sclerosis myself and while that is a neurological disorder MD is a neuromuscular, much of the research overlaps. Frankly in that area the man's a saint. September 3, 2010 at 8:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply publius enigma Jerry are you seriously going to claim that you and your rat pack buddies didnt have an alcohol problem? September 3, 2010 at 8:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply :OP First Betty White – now we need Jerry back! Bring back some of that real gutsy straight talk, no holding back, thats real. You go Jerry! September 3, 2010 at 8:18 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Oda Mores Jerry is on a morphine drip. He is a knowitall smartass, and knows nothing about Lindsay. Who listens to him anyway? O September 3, 2010 at 8:18 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply michael bourque September 3, 2010 at 8:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply LordVader September 3, 2010 at 8:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Zaglossus Jerry Lewis, at 84 he can say what people really want to say but are afraid to because of political correctness. Good for him. And watch his telethon – one of the best things on TV. September 3, 2010 at 8:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply kiuku ew god he looks horrible, absolutely horrifying. and no personality either, just another misogynist from the cookie cutter. why don't these creeps ever comment on men? please get his picture off my screen September 3, 2010 at 8:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply david i love to be there and see jerry slap both of them,right in the mouth! some needs to anyway.please do jerry.go for it! September 3, 2010 at 8:10 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Poohpoohman September 3, 2010 at 8:07 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply nuser September 3, 2010 at 8:06 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Yu Efo Everybody has been sick of Jerry Jewish for a long, long time. He never was funny, and now he's bitter and sad. September 3, 2010 at 8:04 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply nuser September 3, 2010 at 8:21 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply KBinMN September 3, 2010 at 7:59 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply saftgek While the statement Mr. Lewis made re: Ms. Lohan, no reasonable person believes he was speaking in a literal theme. With that said, I believe his messages are sound. Ms. Lohan has yet to hit bottom, mostly because her behavior is enabled by the court system and the "entourage" that does not apply some "tough love" in response to her bratty behavior. Unless and until Ms. Lohan "bottoms out" – likely after she kills someone – her life will continue on its path. Unless and until the judicial system gets serious with sociopaths, innocent people's lives will continue to be negatively impacted. Shame on the courts, Ms. Lohan's so-called friends, and – firstly and mostly – Ms. Lohan herself. Needless to say, the same applies to Ms. Hilton and all the other spoiled young people who act out in destructive and self-destructive ways. September 3, 2010 at 7:53 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply kyle September 3, 2010 at 7:51 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply truthfulster I would love to see Jerry make a move like he would smack Lindsay and instead let her hit him and have her arrested for assault. I believe 95% of witness' would back Jerry. September 3, 2010 at 7:50 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Diane September 3, 2010 at 7:45 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply TickedOFF She is one stupid biatch. I'm also done with any mental midgets that would be apologists for her. She does need to be on the receiving end of one BIG SMACK! September 3, 2010 at 7:44 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Dave Reese I always knew that I loved this man. Now it's been re-affirmed. I didn't know Jerry thought like I did about those two spoiled brats who have contributed nothing to the betterment of humankind.. I saw Jerry perform in Cleveland in 1977 and I cherish the memory even more now. September 3, 2010 at 7:43 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply wetdf Hey Moron...maybe I should smack you because I dont like what you said..would you like that? He is an idiot and so are you! September 3, 2010 at 7:46 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jason I am sitting here reading all of this garbage and can't believe some of you. running your mouth about hitting someone because they party? most of you probably have never even been in a fight. you sit there from your little safe computers and run your mouths. how would you feel if a stranger walked up to you and smacked YOU right in the mouth for making a mistake that hurt noone but you. mind your own damn business unless you are perfect. what if your mistakes were made public for everyone to judge. wouldn't it suck if there was a line of people just waiting to kick you when you are down. try walking a mile in those shoes. September 3, 2010 at 7:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply nick Jason, you are 1000% right! Vert well said Dude! September 3, 2010 at 10:50 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply arno September 3, 2010 at 7:37 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lynne September 3, 2010 at 8:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply TheLeftCoast Wow, that really is old school ~ treating the mentally ill with physical abuse. I thought that went out in the middle ages. September 3, 2010 at 7:36 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jerry September 3, 2010 at 7:36 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply What? I really liked his movies – Now about his comment...Are you F_ serious? People lead their lives however they want and noone has the right to smack anyone! Probably LiLo doesnt even know who that guy is. With that logic I should start smack people because they smell bad, I dont like the way they look and I should smack Jerry just because he is an old fart! wow...what he said is really stupid and I lost every respect for him. September 3, 2010 at 7:33 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mejazzbo September 3, 2010 at 7:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Intruth23 September 3, 2010 at 7:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Nashvilledeb Remember people, Jerry is a COMEDIAN. And just what would you think that Robin Williams would say about her? Love you Jerry! And I'll never tire of those classic movies of yours, including The King of Comedy. You deserved an Oscar for that brilliant performance. September 3, 2010 at 7:26 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mary Jerry Lewis is old school.. People upset with his comments needs to get a grip..When this guy was young and when his kids were growing up.Parents didn't 'have' to take $.. of kids.They were parents and not friends..And they also had the backing of other adults to take charge of their children. So saying he would smack her..Is nothing more than a man speaking old school, on parenting. September 3, 2010 at 7:23 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tina Am I the only one who finds Jerry's comments a little creepy? What they need is to not keep getting away with what they are doing.Put them in jail for the amount of time they are sentenced, and quit letting them out early. Hopefully Paris will be in jail for awhile after this last stunt. September 3, 2010 at 7:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MC No, you're not the only one. The folks on here praising Jerry Lewis are the likely the same people condoning or perpetuating violence against women in their own lives. I actually think Jerry's admirers are scarier than his ludicrous comments. September 3, 2010 at 9:56 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jack September 3, 2010 at 7:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply zenda September 3, 2010 at 7:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply carole Jerry Lewis hasn't changed. He is still physically and verbally abusive like he was to his own wife and children. He just needs to keep his mouth shut. September 3, 2010 at 7:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply maw maw maybe if jerry had smacked his on kids in the mouth they would have turned out better September 3, 2010 at 7:13 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Kelly I agree with Jerry! How refreshing to hear this! LL and PH are, like they said, white trash with money, no purpose, no goals. Just "how can I get into the spotlight this week?" Take their money and donate it to a worthy cause (like MS) and kick them to the curb! September 3, 2010 at 7:10 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SCDad September 3, 2010 at 7:10 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jerry_who_aint_he_dead September 3, 2010 at 7:08 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Katy WHY IS IT THAT JERRY LEWIS CAN SAY HE'LL SMACK A WOMAN BUT WE GET MAD WHEN CHIS BROWN, MEL GIBSON AND CHARLIE SHEEN DO THE SAME THING. HEY JERRY, FU*K OFF, YOU OLE PIECE OF CRAP!!! September 3, 2010 at 7:08 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply nick September 3, 2010 at 10:45 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jan I think jerry made himself look like an a$$... I have no respect for a man who raises millions for a cause and nothing gets done....I think he needs a good smack for taking the money and not helping the MD patients....my husband has never been helped my MD in the 50 years he has had it...always an excuse....NO Jerry you are the one who needs the smack........... September 3, 2010 at 7:08 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mejazzbo Jerry Lewis and Bill Cosby are still legends in their own minds. A history of being successful as entertainers doesn't qualify them as "all knowing" anymore than it makes any other popular entertainer so. September 3, 2010 at 7:00 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mark88888 Jerry better be careful. In some states, speaking from experience, saying you want to smack someone is the same as actually doing it. September 3, 2010 at 6:56 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply PAT I feel sorry for all the true "STARS" who knew what it was like to do without to follow their dreams to Stardom. These two BRATS do not appreciate what they have nor do they know what it takes to be a true Star. They should both be banned from Holiwood and made to go out and work for a living for a while , then maybe they would appreciate what they have. They both have the potential to do good for the world- it is a shame they are wrapped up in themselves. Jerry Lewis I agree they need to be slapped into reality. September 3, 2010 at 6:56 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply yeah right I realize this could be his last attempt at being funny, but things have changed old timer. There were times I wanted to smack him in the mouth when he used to scream like a girl and call it comedy. He wasn't funny then and he's not funny now. Violence against women, or anyone, never resolves the issue. September 3, 2010 at 6:53 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply howlyn Jerry Lewis, the same paragon of wisdom who separated himself and others of his ilk from non-entertainers by referring to the latter as "the little people." What an egocentric dummy. September 3, 2010 at 6:53 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tim September 3, 2010 at 6:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Greedo September 3, 2010 at 6:50 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ken September 3, 2010 at 6:45 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply No4Skin September 3, 2010 at 6:43 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply pat I NEVER watch the MDA telethon. JL is so superficial and a big phony baloney. I used to watch only the last part where he would cry while singing "Walk through a Storm" – and laugh. Judge not JL, least ye be judged. September 3, 2010 at 6:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply bebe46 It amazes me how people with no talent aways manage to keep their names and faces on TV, magazines and the internet.I'll bet they sit at home at night, laughing their butts of, thinking of what stunt to perform next to shock the public. That's why it's called ACTING folks. September 3, 2010 at 6:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply baysailor58 September 3, 2010 at 6:36 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Erik Wargo He should only be aloud to slap her if he prefaces it with a classic "HEY LADY!" September 3, 2010 at 6:35 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Witchyween September 3, 2010 at 6:42 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Wtichyween Right now most people think oh the poor girl she needs guidance and they feel sorry for this spoiled brat. As she ages, it will not be cute anymore and she will be known as just another big lush. September 3, 2010 at 6:35 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply c a skinner She will also look about 25 yrs older than she is due to all the alcohol and drugs. She won't be able to find a plastic surgeon that can fix that. September 3, 2010 at 6:46 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Bob in Chicago Come on children. Grow up and quit attacking Jerry Lewis personally and most of all each other. The real issue is Jerry's inappropriate comment. It reeks of violence and incivility. It is a reflection on his character not his talent. He is irrelevant and so are his comments. Yes his telethons are great and worthwhile but otherwise he should be much more discrete and quite advocating violence. He has a history of this sort of thing. Now if you must attack me and I am sure you will be assured that I will not be back to read your diatribes so why bother? September 3, 2010 at 6:35 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jeff Well...Jerry is old and has a right to be crabby if he wants. Besides...nobody knows how Hollywood screwed actors like Jerry does. September 3, 2010 at 6:31 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Alice TullyHall Does everyone forget the magnitude of drug abuse this mad man was a part of? So, really we have the pot calling the kettle black only worse as at least LL is not calling out people she would like to smack aroung (and I am sure she must have a few, starting with her old man!) JL is just an old drug addict trying to make himself relevant on his favorite weekend of the year to grab publicity. Give it up Jerry, let the French have you! September 3, 2010 at 6:30 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply DJ September 3, 2010 at 6:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Alec Dubro So, Jerry Lewis, who was addicted to opiates and attempted suicide in the 70s, would render physical judgment on a young woman who is also addicted. What a creep. September 3, 2010 at 6:25 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jones September 3, 2010 at 6:24 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Carlos September 3, 2010 at 6:21 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Eric Fisk Jerry, thanks for the work you have done for M.D., but the reality is that the only thing you will be smacking is your lips to another bottle. September 3, 2010 at 6:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply johnrj08 Lewis should know better than anybody that some people are not suited to fame and fortune, especially when it comes during their childhood. If there is even the slightest dysfunction in a family, that kind of scenario will amplify it. There are simply too many kids who, like Lohan, got fame and made a lot of money, then went off the deep end. This is not to say that Lohan shouldn't take responsible for herself as an adult, but it is definitely a mitigating factor which Lewis seems to ignore. His own son had similar problems as I recall when he was growing up. September 3, 2010 at 6:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply AshannaK I agree with OCgirl72: Jerry Lewis is only saying what a lot of people haven't the nerve to say. And while I wouldn't smack either Lindsey or Paris in the mouth, I'd have to ask their parents, "Where the 'bleep' were you when these two delinquents were growing up? Or have they learned how to 'not' behave from observing you?" September 3, 2010 at 6:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Heather I guess this is proof that he did beat his kids. Nice of him to go public with that. Can Lohan have him arrested for threating her? Maybe older men need to be separated from society all together for all of our safety. He is a bad example. September 3, 2010 at 6:13 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lewis ST*U Hey Jerry Lewis... and what do you propose somebody should have done with YOU?? You have absolutely ZERO room to talk about anyone else and their behaviors.. let alone SOBRIETY mate! September 3, 2010 at 6:09 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Born 20 years later I can appreciate Jerry Lewis. At one time he with Dean Martin were two of the hottest comedy acts in America. They made a lot of money and their lives were touched by very little scandle. They understood propriety. If some of you younger people do not appreciate him, it is because you are so young you have no historical perspective. That is you misfortune, you do not know much, especially about AMERICAN history. Young people have a tendancy that American history and world history began in Chicago in 1980. September 3, 2010 at 6:08 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply johnrj08 I think you're right. A lot of people here who are critical of Lewis and deny his talent never saw a Martin & Lewis film in a crowded theater where the audiences would laugh until tears streaked down their faces. It was a different time with different sensibilities, and only a fool would attack something just because it is out of place now. September 3, 2010 at 6:25 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Kid Zoloft September 3, 2010 at 6:08 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Frank How dare him! Now he is the "authority"? I didn't' even know this dinosaur was still alive! Of all the actual evil in the world and this man wants to make a statement about a young woman who had a –driving incident? Wow. I thought his whole premise for getting billions of dollars donated was to SUPPORT THOSE IN TROUBLE??? He is actually saying that he would hit a woman because of-what was it again, oh, yeah, an extremely common driving offense... Yeah, get that "bad" LL for typical antics of her age group. He'd be in a very l o n g slapping line slapping all those doing just the same! This pencil d*ck needs medication and monitoring so he doesn't cause harm to others. September 3, 2010 at 6:03 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply nick September 3, 2010 at 7:44 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ficheye Weird simplification. Apparently you are a fan of Lindsay Lohan. She has a dollar sign over her head, so she is adored by many for that simple fact. I could be wrong. Please list her many respectable achievements. I'm waiting. September 5, 2010 at 4:47 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SRP Jerry was just making a broad statement that both Lindsay & Paris are troubled and in need of big time help. You do not really think he would physically abuse Lindsay. September 3, 2010 at 6:02 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Texas Snow Way to go JER-JER tell it like it is! Show this spoiled brat and her Demonic mother where to Go!They have No class as you do Sir and not to worry she will be before a judge sooner than later....Yes she and her mother Jerry...and don't forget to kick her as she walks out too! September 3, 2010 at 5:59 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Nola lady I bet they took what he said out of context ... he probably said something to this effect, but you know how these reports get distorted. I think what he is trying is say is someone should have disciplined these spoiled kids a long time ago because now they're in a heap of trouble, unable to control their lives due to their never having been told "no." September 3, 2010 at 5:58 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply OMGurKiddingMeRight A washed up drunk has-been going on about some wanna-be's. Like Lindsey and Paris, anything for some cheap publicity September 3, 2010 at 5:57 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Pinkfloyd7 I really, really hope I don't become belligerent and crotchety when I become an old man like Jerry. September 3, 2010 at 5:56 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mom 'bout time someone said it. If the parent's couldn't control them when they were teens; the only ones who can now is the court. Just cause you got money don't make your sh– not stinik. As one TV actor said (and even he got in trouble) "if you can't do the time; don't do the crime. Stop giving them little slaps and "oh I'm having a breakdown" and let them out of jail and judges make the sentence stick. The crimes don't stop when the judge is a whimp. BTW I'm a paralegal and see this all day long. September 3, 2010 at 5:54 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply fastball Why are Hilton and the Kardashian sisters "celebrities" in this culture? Because Americans who care about this kind of stuff are about as smart as house plants. In a nutshell – they're (currently) attractive, seems to have gobs of money, and occasionally show off their cootchies for the camera. Basically, they won the sperm lottery. They were born into lives of privilege – and through absolutely NO effort of their own, have carved out a place in pop culture. I'm not sure I would slap them in the mouth...but I like to think I'd ignore them. September 3, 2010 at 5:54 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply KawiMan Lindsay is a spoiled brat. He needs a good dose of tough love. She has too many enablers. She is young now. However, time slips away very quickly and will soon become her enemy. Unfortunately for her, she has problems that money can't solve and time will take its toll soon enough. September 3, 2010 at 5:53 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply deb From everything I've ever heard/read about Jerry Lewis he's a foul mouthed, blowhard tyrant who fooled around on his wife, was mean to his kids, doesn't get along with anyone. Who is he to talk? In this day and age with the media/internet out to get anyone who is famous it's a wonder more of the "celebrities", especially former child stars who had questionable upbringing, aren't messed up. Both Lindsey and Paris need help. I hope they get their acts together. Why is everyone on this and every other blog so meanspirited? Get a grip, people. September 3, 2010 at 5:53 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Frank You are absolutely right. Many people don't even know the real JL–they only see the persona he portrays in order to get his billions of donated dollars so he can try to redeem himself. This guy has been a disgrace for many a decade already with his own addiction and foul-mouth issues! September 3, 2010 at 6:10 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply scalla I love Jerry Lewis but hope he wouldn't smack her, her atty. would for sure sue him. But I agree, both Lindsey and Paris may follow the footsteps of Anna Nicole Smith, then be dead before their time, someone, somewhere needs to put both of these ladies in lock up, and show them look girls you both are on the wrong track. If you want to live long, you gotta straighten up in a 360 degree hurry. Also, don't hurt my man Jerry, I like it when he makes me laugh and we need him. September 3, 2010 at 5:44 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply zephyr September 3, 2010 at 5:44 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Omin Hey, you little young stupid punks. Did you know this man created comedy. I grew up watching him and so did every other comedian in the world. September 3, 2010 at 5:43 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Helen Yes he created comedy...so what did the Greeks do then thousands of years ago? Ohh wait...there were waiting for Jerry....and he might be good in his job...soooo what? That doesnt give him the right to smack anyone! Do you get it or you are stupid enough that you cant put it in your stupid head ? September 3, 2010 at 11:30 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Raevyn You know, I WANT to be outraged and angry at him for saying such things....but given who he's saying them about, I just can't be. September 3, 2010 at 5:41 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Cillian1977 September 3, 2010 at 5:39 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply your mom September 3, 2010 at 5:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply james Lindsay I wish he would raise a hand to you...so you can kick him in the nuts...make sure you get it on video. September 3, 2010 at 5:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply rad Why wouuld he even make a comment about her, why can't people just mid their own business and keep there mouths shut. Not defending her but seriously what is wrong with stars, did they ever hear the response no comment, or he could have sais Lindsay who? September 3, 2010 at 5:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply joe well at least he got to get it off his chest and got to say what a big portion of us have been thinkin from day one. September 3, 2010 at 5:36 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Burbank Suprising, that's exactly what I've wanted to do to Jerry Lewis for the last 4-5 decades, smack him in the mouth! There has never been a more annoying hyperactive comic. I've always just wanted to scream shut up! at him. It's fun to see someone else annoying him for a change! September 3, 2010 at 5:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply wan September 3, 2010 at 5:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply npt September 3, 2010 at 5:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply DNA September 3, 2010 at 5:32 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mom's favorite WE LOVE you Lindsay Lohan, America's Treasure! Keep up the good work and over maneuvering the photographers! September 3, 2010 at 5:30 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Doug B Jerry Lewis a class act? I beg to differ. If anything, Lindsay should smack HIM in the mouth, I would like to see a formal investigation into what he has done with the millions of dollars supposedly collected in the name of charity. September 3, 2010 at 5:30 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Raevyn According to the Muscular Dystrophy Association, Jerry Lewis, and all other celebrities are volunteers, receiving NO money from the telethons. As of 2007, the telethons had raised just under 1.5 billion dollars. And just what has Ms. Lohan done lately that's selfless? September 3, 2010 at 5:49 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Doug B Of course MDA says that, but if the volunteers didnt take the money, and Jerry didnt take the money, where did it go, what was it spent on, etc. Doug B didnt get a dime so who did. September 3, 2010 at 6:05 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Glinda The money goes towards repairing wheelchairs, sending kids to summer camp, paying for flu shots, support groups, funding free clinics and life saving research. You really shouldn't comment on where the money goes unless you do your research. September 4, 2010 at 1:18 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Harold Greg, maybe you can do a little investigation, just google MD and Jerry Lewis and see if theres any complaints that shows how charitable organizations performance and see if there is anything crooked, you wont find any because I checked it and MD is a legitimate one with no shenanigans September 4, 2010 at 8:21 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jimmy 'i should smack you...right in your caps lock key.' lol Jerry is giving it like it is. Pop these little hussies right in the kisser ta bring em down to earth. -Think the world owes them something... 2 bit hoez need some tough love. September 3, 2010 at 5:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Texan September 3, 2010 at 5:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Joe_Citizen Jerry, Jerry, Jerry......your brain is TOAST.! Besides, even IF LILO gave a damn about responding to your DEMENCIA prompted comment, SHE'D KICK YOUR OLD AZZ in a split second.! Get back in the house old man.! September 3, 2010 at 5:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Izzy Roush September 3, 2010 at 5:53 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Truer Words Truer Words were never spoken. Too bad both sets of parents never took the time to pay attention to their daughters and make sure they were raised right. Of course, it's a sad commentary on our society when two individuals can behave badly and run the risk of injuring others while they're behaving badly AND get all that publicity too. Exactly what, pray tell, has either of them really done that is noteworthy? Besides being born rich or a child star that has, sadly, fallen. September 3, 2010 at 5:27 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Izzy Roush September 3, 2010 at 5:56 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jason September 3, 2010 at 5:27 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply DJ I'm no LiLo fan but Lewis has no room to talk, he was a drunk for most of his life September 3, 2010 at 5:24 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply joe September 3, 2010 at 5:25 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply bozo September 3, 2010 at 5:23 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply joe maybe we can have paris and lohan party together and od together and do the world a favor September 3, 2010 at 5:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply H K September 3, 2010 at 5:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply V Saxena September 3, 2010 at 5:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Moose McDowell September 3, 2010 at 5:14 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply winter2songs What is the matter with this old man? Just because he's old does not mean he gets to go around smacking ANYBODY in the mouth. He's always been a tyrant. I remember years ago when his sons denounced him as being supportive for his Muscular Dystrophy telethon. In front of a camera he's all goodness and light but when the camera is off, he's outta there. One of the MS patients was interviewed after one of his shows and she said he doesn't even talk to them when the cameras are gone. I wouldn't cross the street to spit on him if he was on fire. And he's not funny at all. September 3, 2010 at 5:14 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ikantraed JERRY!!! JERRY!!! JERRY!!! JERRY!!! JERRY!!! JERRY!!! JERRY!!! JERRY!!! JERRY!!! Woot woot woot woot woot woot woot!!! September 3, 2010 at 5:13 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply iceman Jerry Lewis is right on the nose with his comments, but I really Lindsey and Paris need a good 3 years behind bar with no question like everyone else that keeps breaking the law! Judges get paid to do there jobs, they now they need to go by the law instead of there feelings. September 3, 2010 at 5:09 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ohnoes Why is it that these girls catch so much flak for what they are doing? Nobody seemed to have a problem with the Beatles, Rolling Stones, Guns'N'Roses, etc. etc. when they were running around the world high on everything trashing hotels raising all sorts of ruckus. Is it because they are men, so its okay because only men would look up to them and we don't have to watch out for men like we do for women? Or is it because they are musicians and the drugs and partying help them with their craft? Development of morals and values start in the home, not on TV, not on the internet, and not in tabloids. So these girls like to have a little fun, sometimes it's against the law... Who hasn't broken the law? Speeding, driving without a seatbelt, doing a California roll through a stop sign... Doing bad things doesn't always make you a bad person as long as you don't hurt anyone else in the process. It's not like they're breaking into houses or stealing from their parents to get their fix. "But young women look up to them and will try to emulate them!" SO what? Whose fault is that? Lazy, inattentive, negligent parents, that's whose fault it is. They don't claim to be role models, they don't claim to be model citizens, like to party and they have money so they'll do whatever they can get away with. It's not their fault your daughters are mindless sheep following these "shepherds" that don't even recognize them as part of their flock. Most of the people who hate on them only do so because they wish their lives were as privileged as theirs, don't lie, you know it's true. But trying to tear them down won't accomplish anything, and only serves to elevate their exposure, which as most of you have made apparent, is exactly the opposite of what you are looking to do September 3, 2010 at 5:08 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Manos September 3, 2010 at 11:22 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply The Truth Shows how far our society has degraded when people are taking the side of a person who drank, drugged and partied herself to ruin instead of a national icon. A person who has done more in one weekend to help others than she will ever do in her entire life. She deserves to have her clock cleaned, well said Jerry, well said. September 3, 2010 at 5:07 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply joe im glad jerry spoke up someone needs to knock her head off and knock some sense into that pea brain of hers..to bad she couldnt over dose and do the country a favor. September 3, 2010 at 5:07 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Celie Jerry Lewis never has had any sympathy for the mentally unstable. By the time I reach his age, I hope I have evolved to a level above kindergarten ( Jerry's level). September 3, 2010 at 5:05 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Wzrd1 Jerry, it sounds like your anger management issues are getting worse. I'd strongly suggest you seek professional assistance before someone's bodyguard flattens you. I may agree with you, but with your past history of being an abusive jerk in public that made Sinatra look like a gentleman, this latest outburst makes me wonder if you have some form of dementia. Sorry folks, but my wife worked one if his telephons, he was the most obnoxious and abusive boors in the world back then. My mother was airport security and he was obnoxious enough for her to mention when she got home, which was highly unusual. Other people I've known have dealt with him. So, Jerry if those two females in question AND you were in one place with me, I'll have you on one knee and one of the immature brats on the other giving YOUR advice. My only regret will be that I have only two knees and two hands. September 3, 2010 at 5:01 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply me grew up watching his movies, my father loved him. Met him when I was a teenager, he was rude and arrogant, would be difficult to believe that he has changed his ways, and if he did then to quote Bill Cosby, he is just an old person trying to get into heaven. September 3, 2010 at 5:04 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply GoJerryGo! September 3, 2010 at 5:01 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Melvin September 3, 2010 at 4:59 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mary derricotte Upon hearing this arthritic jerk, wanting smack Linsdey, I'm appauled because I simply hated his assine version of commedy Get him Girl. September 3, 2010 at 4:57 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Susan - Canada September 4, 2010 at 2:33 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply grofys September 3, 2010 at 4:55 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply gare September 3, 2010 at 4:54 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Chauvet As a matter of fact, its the holiday, let's all party. Lindsey, Jerry, I have something for you. Everybody let's rock out. Party! at my place http://www.playcrossroads.com/chauvet Here's something for the kids, left over from last spring. Kangeroo get his ... stuck in sliding door..... September 3, 2010 at 4:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply katy I agree with Jerry, these girls need to get smack, they think they are all above everyone else and I personally am sick in tired of both of them. Kids today have no respect, they need to bring back the old ways, parents need to take control of their children. not give them everything they want. You break the law (no matter who you are you do the time and stop crying about it. They both know that they will continue to do what they want and come up with excuses or blame someone else for their problems. EVERYONE KNOWS THEY WILL BOTH BE IN FRONT OF A JUDGE AGAIN, next time they could honestly hurt or kill an innocent bystander because what they are in show business and can get away with it. Poor Little Girls nobody understands them. September 3, 2010 at 4:46 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply B-Dog Why don't you concentrate more on your spelling and grammar instead of insulting people you don't know?? September 3, 2010 at 4:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Susan - Canada Man....I've got a headache reading some of these posts. You people make my head hurt with your run-on sentences, as well as your lack of punctuation, grammar and spelling errors.... September 4, 2010 at 2:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply swimtiger Jerry be nice...you have a telethon coming up in a couple of days. Now go out and make lots of money. September 3, 2010 at 4:46 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Like a Boss I think Lohan deserves a good smack, but not from Jerry Lewis – it sounds like he's fulfilling a fantasy or something. September 3, 2010 at 4:46 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply rsmith Well I will have to think about giving this weekend to the marathon. Give to a women beater???? September 3, 2010 at 4:45 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcaros Lindsay Lohan is fine. Everybody just gets upset when they see someone living an independent life. It's really stupid for Jerry Lewis to threaten to hit her. He's a disgrace and the way he made his living by making fun of the way people with disabilities talk is disgraceful. September 3, 2010 at 4:45 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply B-Dog WOAH! Jerry's head is the size of a parade float! Great message Jerry, lets advocate violence against women! If they do something you don't like just smack em around a little! What a loser! September 3, 2010 at 4:44 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcaros Jerry Lewis is a disgrace. Lindsay Lohan would fold him up like a lawn chair if he even came close to raising a hand. September 3, 2010 at 4:42 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply joe September 3, 2010 at 5:23 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcubed You are on the same drugs as LL. Someone needs to smack you. I wish it were me. September 3, 2010 at 10:31 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Dawn September 3, 2010 at 4:37 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply dislike all pretend persons Jerry please dont hurt your hand unless you punch a lot harder than Joe Louis and Mike Tyson you could not punch any sense of responsibility into that brain if she even has a small one September 3, 2010 at 4:37 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Siohban I grew up with one of JL's sons. The man is a tyrant. These are not the statements of an old, dotty guy who deserves indulgence, but the real JL. He should be pilloried for what he said. September 3, 2010 at 4:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sean Doyle September 3, 2010 at 4:34 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply ru4real21 He's 84 years old and spent the bulk of his life helping other people's kids. All of us baby boomers know two things: Jerry Lewis is a class act; and those of us who received a healthy dose of discipline from parents who wanted to parent us and not just be our friends are better off for it. Hurray to Jerry for saying what too many are afraid to say – and Jeff, I'm with you you – just keep smackin' her until she straightens up! She's a spoiled brat who has flushed away her God given talent, shame on her! Thank you, Jerry Lewis, for years of service to America's kids, from one who has participated in and watched your telethons for nearly four decades now. You are a true American hero. September 3, 2010 at 4:30 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Siohban You are as sick as he is. Those are adults he is speaking of abusing. Women. Do you get off on abusing women, too? September 3, 2010 at 4:37 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply B-Dog Why is he a class act.... cuz you liked his movies? Cuz he gets on camera and raises money? This is the man who refused to acknowledge his own son! This is man who cheated on his wife with countless other women! This is the man who wants to abuse women! Classy. September 3, 2010 at 5:04 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Rick Oops...I forgot. When I got out of line in school, teachers paddled my butt, then I got my butt paddled when I got home. Not only did I survive I have a college education & my children are doing very well. September 3, 2010 at 4:30 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tbs I'm sure Jerry Lewis was quick to smack Sinatra and Dean Martin in the mouth when they were living as drunks in the Rat Pack Days. Or maybe that's where Jerry learned that women need to be smacked around. September 3, 2010 at 4:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jake Wow! Thank You Mr. Lewis for stating out loud what, I'm sure many parents have wanted to say (or do) but have been too afraid too. I was brought up "old school" and even got some "Fan Room Counseling" during my navy days (long gone now). Am looking for you Marathons to go away. Then you can come back with the celebrity "Smack-a-thons"! Would be a great money maker for charity! September 3, 2010 at 4:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply GrmaC She needs more than a smack in the mouth. She needs to just go away... she's not much of an actress of anything else. If the press would quit writing about her, she'd disappear. September 3, 2010 at 4:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Brian Hard to have any sympathy for either of them, and I can understand where someone of Jerry's age would be frustrated with spoiled kids who have everything but act like asses, but assault is not the answer. Metaphorically, yes...they need a kick in the ass and hopefully jail will provide that (doubtful), but what to you expect in a society where money can buy everything...even escape from punishment. If this were your average girl that age, they'd have already been in jail. September 3, 2010 at 4:28 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mnb LiLo has everything because she has been working when she was a child! Do you have kids? Did you send them for work at 10 years old? Moron September 3, 2010 at 7:39 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply beth September 3, 2010 at 4:26 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply emil All of you people who took shots at Jerry for sayng this, please don't ever have children. The world does not need another moron like you. Jerry is 100% right. Regular people do not get away witht his stuff. Regular people cannot AFFORD to get away with this. They should be shipped to a rehab facility in the middle of North Philly, then jail like regular people. And what he said is not advocating violence against women, its discipline!. Me, i'm 28, I would punch both of them in face, knock their teeth out and break their nose, because they DESERVE IT. And I would go TO JAIL FOR YEARS because the justice system is all about screwing regular people. September 3, 2010 at 4:26 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Rick September 3, 2010 at 4:35 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply KICK September 3, 2010 at 4:55 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply yep_i_said_it September 3, 2010 at 5:03 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Ohnoes Why is it that these girls catch so much flak for what they are doing? Nobody seemed to have a problem with the Beatles, Rolling Stones, Guns'N'Roses, etc. etc. when they were running around the world high on everything trashing hotels raising all sorts of ruckus. Is it because they are men, so its okay because only men would look up to them and we don't have to watch out for men like we do for women? Or is it because they are musicians and the drugs and partying help them with their craft? Development of morals and values start in the home, not on TV, not on the internet, and not in tabloids. So these girls like to have a little fun, sometimes it's against the law... Who hasn't broken the law? Speeding, driving without a seatbelt, doing a California roll through a stop sign... Doing bad things doesn't always make you a bad person as long as you don't hurt anyone else in the process. It's not like they're breaking into houses or stealing from their parents to get their fix. "But young women look up to them and will try to emulate them!" SO what? Whose fault is that? Lazy, inattentive, negligent parents, that's whose fault it is. They don't claim to be role models, they don't claim to be model citizens, like to party and they have money so they'll do whatever they can get away with. It's not their fault your daughters are mindless sheep following these "shepherds" that don't even recognize them as part of their flock. Most of the people who hate on them only do so because they wish their lives were as privileged as theirs, don't lie, you know it's true. But trying to tear them down won't accomplish anything, and only serves to elevate their exposure, which as most of you have made apparent, is exactly the opposite of what you are looking to do. September 3, 2010 at 5:07 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mark September 3, 2010 at 6:14 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MC Actually, it is violence against women, since they are grown women and he's a grown man. In the very least, Jerry Lewis is a man joking about wanting to assault women for not being well-behaved, an idea that should scare the heck out of anyone with a conscience. September 3, 2010 at 9:45 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Wow What a tough guy you are knocking a womans teeth out. How can you have so much hate for someone you have never met? Time for your meds. emil. September 3, 2010 at 9:51 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply CATom Why is lady gaga verbally attacking lindsey lohan threatining to smack her around. Lady gaga needs to lose the tux and wear womens cloths. September 3, 2010 at 4:26 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MickeyMudTurtle September 15, 2010 at 1:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Bryon What did Jerry Lewis have to say about his daughter he abandoned and does't acknowledge? He is washed up September 3, 2010 at 4:23 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jimthedo, Phoenix, AZ She will wind up dead sooner or later and then we can all focus on the next celeb-loser. September 3, 2010 at 4:23 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply phoenix hunter yup, and after she's dead, people would say "poor girl. somebody shoulda smacked some sense into her before it came to this." September 4, 2010 at 8:36 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MrThou September 3, 2010 at 4:23 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Brad What Mr. Lewis said is dead on, maybe a bit harsh, but right in every aspect. People are tired of these wealthy, snobby, trashy girls breaking out in tears, playing the victim card, when they are caught with COCAINE. Really? I wish the courts would figuratively smack them in the mouth and keep them in prison for WHOLE amount of time given. Kudos Jerry, kudos. September 3, 2010 at 4:21 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply mnbn And you are mister perfect to judge others? Who do you think you are? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will tell you ... a nobody! So F OFF! September 3, 2010 at 10:39 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply DukeMantee September 3, 2010 at 4:21 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply bailoutsos ___lamook you ought to see his movies. Especially the ones with dean martin! kewl! @@@ Seems like he is still playing the buffoon. September 3, 2010 at 4:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Doug G Jeez Jerry... A little rough aren't 'ya – given you made your career goofing with one of Hollywood's biggest lushes (Dino M.) September 3, 2010 at 4:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tb doug, its a little known fact that good ol Dino was not the lush everyone thought he was. On stage it was all an act. He drank club soda on the set of his variety show, even though he appeared to be extremely inebriated. this is called "acting", something the Lindsay Lohans and Paris Hiltons of the world know nothing about. Money cannot buy happiness. Those idiot brats will never figure that out. September 4, 2010 at 9:37 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply James Doug...sorry to inform you of your error. Dean martin was NOT a lush...he just played one on his show. In his BIO on TV this was discussed at length. Dean did not have alcohol in the glass he always carried...just juice or water. No one should use violent imagery such as "Smacking someone"...we have way to much senseless violence in our society today. One simply cannot compare growing up many years ago to today...unfortunately things got out of control many years ago. We did not have such violent gangs and individuals in general back in the day. Our society has gone to hell...and with all the immigrants we now have, our childhood memories of the good life are gone forever. September 4, 2010 at 11:15 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SymbolCrash December 28, 2010 at 11:48 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply megirl We need to stop being so politically correct and polite and start telling it like it is. 90% of Hollywood are nothing but spoiled brats and we need the Jerry Lewises and Bill Cosbys to say what we all would like to say but are all too polite to say. Out with the era of permissiveness and reasoning with kids and let them have a good old fashioned discipline session with parents who value education and common sense. September 3, 2010 at 4:18 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sara Well I am from the old school and I believe that the old school works better than the new school of no respect, no discpline, and giving everything to someone wants it. There is no regard for self or others. These young ladies need to grow up. September 3, 2010 at 4:18 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Beowulf I think she might like it. She hasn't had any qualms abusing herself for this long, so why not let someone else do it for free? September 3, 2010 at 4:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply James Vond September 3, 2010 at 4:16 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply KICK September 3, 2010 at 4:51 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jeff September 3, 2010 at 4:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply thePhoenix September 3, 2010 at 4:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Chauvet My wife went to the doctor. She comes home and says: "The doctor says I have the breats of an 18 hear old woman". I said :" Did he ask about your 45 year old ass ?" She says: "No, your name never came up." Love you Jer hope everything is great. Give my best to the family and kids. RC September 3, 2010 at 4:14 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SA "You have the breasts of an 18-year old woman?... Well, give them back! You're getting them all wrinkled!!" LOL (Sorry, I borrowed that line from Benny Hill. Still funny.) September 3, 2010 at 4:20 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Maria He's right! They are spoiled brats who need/ed some parenting. Give a kid everything they want & this is what you end up with. September 3, 2010 at 4:14 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply AntiPalinAlaskan September 23, 2010 at 9:27 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Rick I'm 60. When I got sideways my grandmother whacked my butt. My mother whacked my butt. My aunts whacked my butt. My Dad got back from overseas, he whacked my butt. I drank from a garden hose. I took a crap in an outhouse w/wasps around me. Guess what? I lived. Thanks for truth, Jerry. No sympathy for the rest. September 3, 2010 at 4:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Dan September 5, 2010 at 1:26 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Daughter September 3, 2010 at 4:11 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lee I was wondering the very same thing. Jerry has a daughter that he does not acknowlege. A DNA was taken of her and Jerrys son; It was like 98 % possitive shes his sister.. So Jerry should take care of his own first. And his daughter looks just like him; and is really nice. I love Jerry; but it is true. September 3, 2010 at 5:41 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply sylcat the people who need smack in the mouth are her parents...look at her dad, no wonder she is messed up. September 3, 2010 at 4:10 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Chauvet Linsey Lohan and Jerry are riding on a plane. The stewardess asks, "Mr. Lewis would you like to have a drink?" Jerry says " I'll have a vodka with a twist of lime". The stewardess leans over and asks: " Miss Lohan would you like to have a drink?" Linsey replies: "Why I would just as soon commit adultery!" Jerry says: "Hold my order! I didn't know we had options." September 3, 2010 at 4:09 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jose September 3, 2010 at 4:02 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply gare You tell 'em, Jerry....If she ever showed up on my street, I'd probably do the same thing. She is a peice o' crap. September 3, 2010 at 4:01 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply sheppard September 3, 2010 at 6:00 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jokr September 3, 2010 at 3:57 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply PJ September 3, 2010 at 3:57 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply tcubed September 3, 2010 at 10:43 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Southern Snow September 3, 2010 at 3:57 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Nan September 3, 2010 at 3:57 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Carter Sherline Jerry Lewis is a great comedian and has done great good for charity...but the violence that he suggestions is just plain wrong. I'll never be able to look at him in a good light again. September 3, 2010 at 3:54 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Phil So, were you to have a daughter that turned out like Paris or LiLo, what would you do? How would you deal with it? September 3, 2010 at 4:02 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply zbtrocker September 3, 2010 at 4:22 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Zebula Yeah, 'cause everyone knows Mr. Lewis has a habit of beating on young women. He was blowing off steam, although I couldn't agree with him more. September 3, 2010 at 5:03 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply annca We all try as parents to raise our children properly, things do go wrong, not a fault of parenting. Although a response to Zbtrocker_____ If we were to discopline our children today, there sure would be some activist watching and lock the parents up for child abuse , even if it was a swat on the butt. _____ Dam if you do an damed if you dont. Jerry is 100% right , smack them both across the lip once, knock some brains into them. September 3, 2010 at 8:36 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Dean Martin I guess it's that time of year to dust off the cranky old guy and put him out on stage to raise some money. September 3, 2010 at 3:51 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sandy September 3, 2010 at 4:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sophie Mr. Lewis, I'll hold her down for you while you smack her. She is a spoiled selfish bratt who needs to get real. September 3, 2010 at 3:46 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply dave from an ol drunk to a young drunk. this guy is the biggest boozer and he is talking crap about someone else. stick with the marathons jl September 3, 2010 at 3:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lee September 3, 2010 at 4:13 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SA September 3, 2010 at 4:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply r Oh who wouldn't like to mentally smack Lohan and Hilton upside the head!!!! Figuratively, he means he'd like to snap them out of their self-destructiveness. It should be so easy. September 3, 2010 at 2:33 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply John Jerry, Thanks for the Sanity and honesty, things you have been known for over the years. I am happy your still with us and was plesently surprised to notice you in the Movie Lil Abner... Yeah I know most would not know of that movie but if these "girls" you want to get some common sense into had just 1% of the smarts of the cast of that movie they would be ok right now. Thanks again for the sanity break September 3, 2010 at 2:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Laura WOW,that's a bit harsh. maybe a smack up side her head,not in her mouth. Jerry's been around a long time - he is respected. September 3, 2010 at 1:36 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply TJ Oh Jerry, what can I say? You are my hero right about now. If anyone doesn't understand where Jerry is coming from, just check out the movie "The King of Comedy" and you will see the real Jerry Lewis. I agree, Lindsay, Paris, and that Snookie character and a few others needs a good smack in the mouth, to say the least. September 3, 2010 at 1:24 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MC Yeah, badly behaved women should be smacked in the mouth, says some man who used to be a comedy star. And you agree with this...because? And we then we wonder why violence against women is a problem in the United States. September 3, 2010 at 9:39 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply jules If her parents had taken the time to train her right and keep her in line at a younger age which includes, an occasional swat – she might not need a 'smack in the mouth' today..... kudos to you Jerry for saying exactly what we all think. September 3, 2010 at 12:56 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply KICK September 3, 2010 at 4:42 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Thomas KICK No. He meant "train". "Raise" is something one does with children. Paris and Lindsay are more along the lines of fussy and prissy little poodles. September 3, 2010 at 11:35 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Joan I have had many laugh's in my younger days of Mr. lewis,in his time. Time has it's way of letting us know,just where we are in this life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank-You Mr. Jerry Lewis.And all that was like him!!!!! May God Bless us all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! September 3, 2010 at 12:41 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply sheppard Jerry Lewis was a real tool in his day. He just happened to live in a time when he had the studio to cover-up for him. Just because his fun days are over doesn't make him an authority on what is wrong with today. This is like the pot calling the kettle black. The fact that his over-blown ego has "no sympathy" for a troubled young woman doesn't garner any respect for him. September 3, 2010 at 12:19 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply John Sheppard Nor does LiLo or Paris deserve any respect for their antics, you would think that after Jail time and rehab LiLo would have gained some perspective. Well her hit and run incident of today tells the world that she has not learned anything and that Mr. Lewis is quite correct to call her out on this. I can respect Mr. Lewis more because he lived through thoes old party days and survived. He only effected his and his family with his antics and he is and has made his amends to them in his own way. You think LiLo or Paris will ever think they are wrong? Running over baby strollers or smoking so much pot that a cycle patrolman can follow the vapor to them in traffic? You may not like Mr. Lewis and his comments, that is fine with me but as a father of a young girl don't think your pity for these "girls" is going to make anyone with a brain and children change their mind and feel sorry for LiLo or Paris. September 3, 2010 at 2:56 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sandy Yes, he does have an overblown ego - much larger than his so-called talent. Those of you who admire him so would be shocked if you met the person behind the mask. September 3, 2010 at 4:29 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Zebula September 3, 2010 at 4:55 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Lisa I have never quite figured out why we 'worship' people just because they are on tv or the movies? I loved Jerry Lewis's movies and watching him on tv but why does that make him better or LiLo, Paris H. or anyone better than us? I'm darned good at my job but... I just don't make near the amount of money they do and not near as many people watch me do my job. LiLo does need help and all around her letting her get away with it is not going to help her. If she keeps going one day there might be an infant in the above mentioned stroller.As to the comment about hitting her – who hasn't threatened to hurt (ie – I could KILL you!!) someone at one point or other but never imagined we reallywould? September 3, 2010 at 5:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply cmkc Wow, these postings are full of such vitriole (directed at the wrong person!). Sheppard's comment is one of the few that makes a valid observation. September 4, 2010 at 8:16 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply The Fly on the wall Jerry is a tool, but Lindsey is a troubled young woman? Nice age discrimination thing you have going there. September 5, 2010 at 5:38 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply SZimmerman It's a good thing it was Jerry Lewis who said that. If it had been Chuck Norris... September 3, 2010 at 12:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply MEL September 3, 2010 at 1:09 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mel September 5, 2010 at 10:24 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply kathy September 3, 2010 at 12:06 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply skotz I agree. Many 'kids' these days need a smack from their parents. Unfortunately parents are no longer legally allowed to give it to them September 3, 2010 at 4:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply chris September 3, 2010 at 12:01 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply portalpunk what he didn't say is that it would turn him on, hahaha, LiLo would probably like it too. September 3, 2010 at 11:53 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply AntiPalinAlaskan September 23, 2010 at 9:24 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Yugo People Jerry Lewis' age get to say what ever they want, whereever they want. my father in law is the same age and is more opinionated than ever – sometimes crazy as a bat too – anyone who has survived this crazy world that long has a right to say anything they want – we should all be as lucky and successful as Jerry Lewis. We still love you Jerry! September 3, 2010 at 11:51 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Paul Whittaker September 3, 2010 at 11:26 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply KC And I suppose you have never used the term, I just want to smack them? I know I have even if I wouldn't act on it. All he is saying is someone needs to knock some sense into her. September 3, 2010 at 11:44 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Bucklee September 3, 2010 at 3:49 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Bucklee September 3, 2010 at 3:51 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Mac in Denver September 3, 2010 at 4:52 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Sam Rothstein September 3, 2010 at 5:00 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Izzy Roush September 3, 2010 at 6:15 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply poopoopeepee September 4, 2010 at 9:02 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Chris, Murfreesboro, TN I find it absolutely amazing that people are disagreeing with Paul here. What he said is 100% correct, no question about it. I do love the comment telling Paul to grow up though; that was probably the most misplaced comment I've seen in a while on these boards. September 4, 2010 at 10:49 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply LL September 3, 2010 at 11:23 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Jujube September 3, 2010 at 11:14 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Robin Bray September 4, 2010 at 9:36 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply AntiPalinAlaskan Yeah...the good old days when threatening to beat up a woman was cool? Want slavery and child labor back too, while you're at it? September 23, 2010 at 9:21 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply photojournalist6 Mr. Lewis stays so drunk he probably couldn't find Lohan's mouth to smack it. Actually Dean Martin should have smacked Lewis in the mouth years ago then the rest of the Rat Pack should have joined in slapping the smart @ss punk. September 3, 2010 at 11:06 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply Joy September 3, 2010 at 5:32 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply AntiPalinAlaskan September 23, 2010 at 9:20 am | Report abuse | Log in to Reply AJ I agree Nettie, Old School seems to be the only thing that will help these two ladies in fighting their addictions. As to the other two who posted, doesn't mean old school for Jerry, means that we need to bring back old school punishment for these two instead of this slap on the hand they are getting. Give them real jail time just like everyone else gets. Stop giving them this child daycare crap, give them what they need, a REAL PUNISHMENT!!! Heck if they were in another country and caught they would be beaten with a cane pole for sure, it's needed. September 23, 2010 at 7:17 pm | Report abuse | Log in to Reply pat If these women are crying out for help I guess you think slapping them in the mouth would HELP them????

Muscular Dystrophy Association

What's missing: Magnum Force, The Enforcer, Sudden Impact, and The Dead Pool?

Leasing News - information, news, education and entertainment for the commercial bank, finance and leasing industry "Top Gun" Ignacio Sanchez, CLP "I grew up in Southern California and attended both San Diego State University and California State University, Fullerton.   "I started working for Balboa Funding Group in Jan 1990 right after I graduated from California State University, Fullerton where I graduated with a BA degree in Business Administration with my emphasis in finance. I started out as a Junior Account Executive where I was taught leasing by Jim Raeder, Shawn Giffin and Mark McQuitty. I became an account executive in June ,1990. In January, 1993, I became the Sales Manager for the Irvine office and served as sales manager for almost 4 years.  As sales manager, I was in charge of all Irvine sales operations, and at times funding, credit and training of new sales reps. Even with all my responsibilities, I continued to sell and was in the top 3 in sales for Balboa Capital every year.  In 1995, I became a CLP. In 1997, I stepped down as Sales Manager and went back to selling and training Jr. account executives. I continued selling there until I quit in 1998 because there was no chance of ownership.   "I received a base salary, car allowance, plus 30% of all profit on both the front and back end of my transactions.   "In 1998 I started TriStar Capital, LLC with my brother Mike Sanchez who was with Balboa for 5 years and Banc One leasing for 1 year and Robert Hendrix who was the National Sales Manager at Balboa Capital. I continue to sell and run the company with my partners. In the 4 years we have been in business we have grown rapidly and funded about 20mm in equipment cost in 2001.  We hope to grow by at least 25% this year."   (These ads are “free” to those seeking employment or looking to improve their position) Credit, syndication, workout experience Exceptional work ethic, common sense coupled with practical experience in equipment finance, consumer, commercial. Can interact with all levels of borrowers and intermediaries. Not an originator – but can help sales team close – great up sell ability. Will relocate for the right opportunity AND can work remotely. aaacorrespondent@gmail.com Orlando, Florida As a Commercial Credit Analyst/Underwriter, I have evaluated transactions from sole proprietorships to listed companies, across a broad spectrum of industries, embracing a multitude of asset types. Sound understanding of balance sheet, income statement and cash flow dynamics which impact credit decisions. Strong appreciation for credit/asset risk.  Bank Refused Coverage on Banker’s Bond for Sheldon Player’s Equipment Acquisition Resources By Tom McCurnin Leasing News Legal Editor (Sheldon Player in Wyoming) Highland Bank’s $3 Million Dollar Loss Due to Forgery of EAR’s Principal, Donna Malone (the late Sheldon Player’s alleged wife), Was Claimed to Have Been Directly Caused From Forgery, Thus Triggering Bankers’ Blanket Bond.  But Bank’s Insurer Obtains Summary Judgment That Loss Was Inevitable and Not Directly Related to Forged Guaranty. Although Christmas season is not yet upon us, the Equipment Acquisition Resources (“EAR”) case is a case which continues to bless lawyers with seemingly endless litigation. There are several cases on going, such as Home Savings Bank, as well as FBI filings against the president Mark Anstett and vendor of equipment, George Ferguson (1) Today’s case is a marginal case between victim Highland Bank and its insurer, BankInsure.  The Bank thought that its EAR loss was covered under its Bankers Blanket Insurance Policy. The Insurer disagreed, and the Court ruled that it was not a covered loss.  The facts follow.  A regurgitation of the complete facts surrounding the EAR scam is unnecessary here.  Sheldon Player, the principal of EAR, scammed dozens of leasing companies with double financed equipment and non-existent equipment.  (2) In 2005, EAR and First Premier Capital entered into a lease agreement under which First Premier was to provide manufacturing equipment to EAR.  As a condition precedent to the Lease Agreement, EAR principals Sheldon Player and Donna Malone executed personal guaranties with First Premier on May 27, 2005, guaranteeing all the obligations under the Lease Agreement.  The bank believed that Ms. Malone’s guaranty was likely forged.  In 2006, First Premier approached Highland Bank on EAR's behalf, seeking to borrow $3 million to finance the equipment lease, contemplating that Highland Bank would advance $3 million acquisition cost of the equipment to First Premier, which would then advance the funds to EAR’s equipment vendor.  First Premier would retain title to the equipment, and EAR would lease the equipment from First Premier under a lease schedule.  Highland Bank would receive payment of its lease financing through an assignment of the rental payments due to First Premier under the Lease Agreement.  As relevant here, First Premier assigned three schedules to Highland Bank for an approximate aggregate sum of $4,000,000.  Before closing any of the three loans, Highland Bank did not contact EAR, Player, or Malone, did not inspect the equipment or determine its liquidation value.  The Bank did not conduct a background check on Player or Malone, or ask First Premier to do so.  By 2009, Highland Bank determined that the loans were uncollectible.  In 2010, Highland Bank filed suit against First Premier in Minnesota, alleging that First Premier was in default of the representations and warranties under the Assignment.  Highland Bank obtained judgment against First Premier, but has been unable to collect on its judgment.  First Premier is out of business.  As a last resort, Highland Bank brought suit against its insurer, BancInsure, which issued a blanket bankers bond, insuring against certain losses arising from a variety of exposures, such as forgery and counterfeiting.  Highland Bank sued its insurer for a total of $2,011,618.30, the loss it incurred from the three loans. The Bankers Bond covers financial institutions from losses resulting directly from the Bank having, in good faith, acquired any credit on the faith of any original guaranty which bears a signature which may have been a forgery.  Actual physical possession of the guaranty is a condition precedent to the Insured's having relied on the faith of such items.  Highland Bank moved for summary judgment, seeking coverage for its loss, due to forgery.  BankInsure also moved for summary judgment.  BancInsure argued that there is no loss “resulting directly from” Highland Bank's extension of credit on the faith of an alleged forged document, because the Malone guaranty was worthless.  According to the credit write up, the Malone guaranty was worthless because Ms. Malone had a tangible net worth of negative $4,580,000.  BankInsure argued that the Bank could not demonstrate reliance on the Malone guaranty because it never examined the original document before funding the loans, a condition of the Bankers Blanket Bond.  The Court held that the loss had to be one which resulted directly from the forgery, and as we know now, the EAR leases were doomed from the start, and a loss would have occurred whether the guaranty was forged or not.  Accordingly, the Court granted BankInsure’s motion for summary judgment and denied Highland Bank’s motion for summary judgment.  This left Highland Bank high and dry to collect on its three EAR deals totaling over $4 million dollars.  Highland Bank appealed to the 8th Circuit.  What are the lessons here for the equipment lessor? First, Banker’s Blanket Bonds are specialized forms of insurance, which generally protect a financial institution against specific kinds of fraud and defalcation.  It cannot be used as a poor man’s credit insurance.  Second, while I don’t fault the Bank giving the lawsuit the old college try, I thought the case was doomed from the start, because it was hard to argue with a straight face that the loss was directly attributable to the forged guaranty.  I guess what I am saying is that I wouldn’t rely too much on these types of bonds.  Finally, as a post script, BankInsure was placed into receivership on August 21, 2014 by the Oklahoma, so the likelihood of recovery from this avenue has now been made even more remote.  The bottom line to this case is that Bankers Blanket Bonds are a specialized form of insurance which protect a financial institution from specific kinds of fraud and defalcation, and are not credit insurance.  As such, they are strictly construed.  The outcome of this case was very predictable.  “Before closing any of the three loans, Highland Bank did not contact EAR, Player, or Malone, did not inspect the equipment or determine its liquidation value.  The Bank did not conduct a background check on Player or Malone, or ask First Premier to do so.”  This pre-closing contact with the parties involved, the inspection and evaluation of the equipment in consideration of the amount to be extended, and background checks on the principals and guarantors would have provided documentation against the extension of ANY amount. Highland Bank Case Top Stories August 25--August 29 Opened Most by Readers of Leasing News   (1) Name This Company in the Bulletin Board Complaint Take a Guess (2) Balboa Capital Settles $36,454 Attorney Fee Complaint    After Getting Suit Dismissed Against Regents Capital http://leasingnews.org/archives/Aug2014/8_25.htm#balboa (3) A Key Part of the Economic Recovery Is Finally Happening http://leasingnews.org/archives/Aug2014/8_29.htm#key Jim Raeder Responds to Criticism of CapitalWerks http://leasingnews.org/archives/Aug2014/8_25.htm#archives (5) New Hires—Promotions in the Leasing Industry http://leasingnews.org/archives/Aug2014/8_29.htm#hires (6) Are Accurint Reports a Consumer Credit Report?            Will This Change Their Use?  By Tom McCurnin, Leasing News Legal Editor http://leasingnews.org/archives/Aug2014/8_27.htm#accurint (7) Leasing 102 by Mr. Terry Winders, CLP Pricing (Tie)(8) Earthquake in Napa, California http://leasingnews.org/archives/Aug2014/8_25.htm#napa (Tie) (8) Financial Pacific Completes First Year as Subsidiary of Umpqua Bank http://leasingnews.org/archives/Aug2014/8_29.htm#fin (9) Sales Make it Happen by Robert Teichman, CLP Sales Isn't Just for the Salesperson http://leasingnews.org/archives/Aug2014/8_27.htm#happen Do Not Call Registry --and you need to make a complaint All telemarketers calling consumers in the United States are required to download the numbers on the Do Not Call Registry to ensure they do not call those who have registered their phone numbers. The first five area codes are free, and organizations that are exempt from the Do Not Call rules, such as some charitable organizations, may obtain the entire list for free. Telemarketers must subscribe each year for access to the Registry numbers. For consumers who want to add their phone number to the Registry, registration is free and does not expire. https://www.donotcall.gov/?utm_source=govdelivery You can also verify a registration on the site above, as well as submit a complaint.  You need to file a complaint to make the registry work, otherwise you will find yourself screaming more often to those who make these calls (who will continue regardless of what you call them).   Career Crossroad---By Emily Fitzpatrick/RII   Question: During my last interview, I could tell the interviewer had some concerns regarding my candidacy. How do I handle a situation like this in the future? Answer: Towards the close of the interview, you should have asked the interviewer if he/she had any concerns regarding your candidacy and addressed them accordingly. However, many times the interviewer does not introduce the subject, and many job seekers will not touch this issue because they are not prepared.   Moving Forward No matter how successful an interview seems to be going, the interviewer will have questions (maybe concerns) about the candidate’s skills and abilities relative to a position.  Concerns may be caused by something that was or was not discussed; there may have been a misunderstanding of a question asked or an answer given, etc.… this is normal; seldom does a candidate fill 100% of the job specs. A concern in the mind of the interviewer can often be corrected. However, if a concern is not addressed before the end of the interview, your candidacy could be lost; the need to deal with concerns must be made clear and obvious.    Dealing with concerns or potential weakness in any form is difficult under the best of circumstances. Perhaps the best way to approach the discussion is to request a comparison between the targeted candidate and yourself. This is a very direct question that will require an open, direct response. For example, “Mrs. Fitzpatrick, now that we have had an opportunity to talk about the position, I feel more confident than ever that I can be of assistance to your organization. Do you have any concerns about my abilities to do the job?" The candidate must now be ready for the response and know how to handle it. Since this is a direct approach, some interviewers are able to deal with the question openly, and some have problems with it. If you hear a vague response, you are probably not being given the information you requested. You might come back and say, “… I was trying to see if you had any concerns about my ability in any specific area so that we could address them now …”   If you sense the interviewer is uncomfortable, then move on. If a concern has been raised, you do not have a lot of time to prepare your response. You should have spent time prior to the interview identifying strengths and weaknesses and preparing appropriate answers. Bottom line, do not be afraid to ASK the interviewer their concerns AND make sure you PREPARE before the interview for every type of scenario/question/concern that may arise. Emily Fitzpatrick by Mr. Terry Winders, CLP So You Want to Start a Leasing Company? One of the problems when you start a leasing company is to determine if you are going to be a broker, packager, or funder. Possibly a bit of all three. A broker gets a fee for introducing the lessee to a lessor. The transaction is not being completed until the lessor approves the deal. Usually the documents are created or supplied by the lessor. It is priced with the lessor in mind so the broker’s fee is part of the deal. Once the transaction is completed and funded, the broker has no further responsibilities and has earned the fee. A packager usually structures and prices the deal and creates the documents. A packager reviews the credit requirements and any residual prior to approaching a lessor. When the deal is acceptable to the lessor, a complete package is delivered. Income to a packager is a front end fee and they may participate in the proceeds from a residual sale or re-rental that exceeds the booked residual. If you establish the ability to fund leases by borrowed funds or invested capital, the firm must have at least three years of operating expenses because all the expenses are front end loaded while income is spread over the term of the leases. In addition, a lease loss reserve must be established that reduces income for three to five years until it gets fully established. This means that charge offs or the loss from the sale of capital assets must be taken at the same time that the loss account is being established. One of the advantages of small companies is the ability to avoid using GAAP accounting requirements in the first few years. Cash accounting will allow for a better control of income and a better control of expenses in the near term. Once a few years elapse and the firm needs to look for institutional capital or bank loans, GAAP accounting and audits will be required. The territory served by the new leasing entity needs to be more local that spread out among several states. There is a fact in the leasing business that as your market size increases so do your operating expenses. The vendor market is appealing, but you need to have vendors that sell in your market and avoid vendors that ask you to fund leases that are across the country as it increases your licensing, state income tax, property tax, and other requirements to do business in each state. The cost of doing business in each State requires a couple of million dollars portfolio to just cover the operating expenses. It takes time to establish this portfolio so it is a further drag on income. Many start-ups in the commercial equipment leasing business use all three methods of leasing so they can get income from the best source and hopes all goes well for a few years so they can establish a good footing with out many losses. Mr. Terry Winders, CLP, has been a teacher, consultant, expert witness for the leasing industry for thirty years and can be reached at terrywinders11@yahoo.com or 502-649-0448. He invites your questions and queries. Previous #102 Columns: http://www.leasingnews.org/Conscious-Top%20Stories/Leasing_102/Index.htm   Mr. Terry Winders available as a consultant regarding assisting attorneys in resolving disputes or explaining procedures or reviewing documents as utilized in the finance and leasing industry. He is the author of several books, including DVD's, as well as weekly columnist to Leasing News. He also performs audits of leasing companies as an expert on documentation, and has acted as an expert witness on leasing for litigation in legal and tax disputes, including before the IRS. He also has taught the senior bank examiners, how to review a bank leasing department, for the Federal Reserve in Washington D.C. and has trained the examiners for the FDIC on how to prepare a lease portfolio for sale. 502.649.0448/terrywinders11@yahoo.com (This ad is a “trade” for the writing of this column. Opinions contained in the column are those of Mr. Terry Winders, CLP) Director of Operations Finance Capital The CLP designation identifies an individual as a knowledgeable professional to employers, clients, customers, and peers in the equipment finance industry. There are currently 215 Certified Lease Professionals throughout the world. For more information, call Reid Raykovich, CLP at (206) 535-6281 or visit www.clpfoundation.org. Companies with More than One CLP 1. Financial Pacific Leasing – 23 2.  First American Equipment Finance – 21 3.  Orion First Financial – 9 4.  Allegiant Partners- 10 (includes Clearview and First Star) 5.  ECS Financial Services – 7 6.  Arvest Equipment Finance – 6 7.  GreatAmerica Financial Services – 6 8.  Ascentium Capital LLC – 5 9.  Banc of California - 4 10. Innovative Lease Services, Inc. – 4 11. Maxim Commercial Capital – 4 12. Bank of the West – 4 13. Canon Financial Services-3 End of Refi Boom Creating Opportunity for Smaller Banks and Other Financial Firms SNL Financial Report By Hina Nawaz and Zach Fox   Regulatory data from the second quarter showed mortgage holdings continued to decline among banks through the second quarter, with the largest banks posting the most severe declines. Mortgage origination volume has struggled after a rise in rates in the middle of 2013 put an end to a refinancing boom. In 2012, rates on 30-year fixed-rate mortgages fell to nearly 3.5% and rates on 15-year mortgages actually dipped below 3.0%. After spiking in the second half of 2013, rates on 30-year mortgages started 2014 at roughly 4.5% and 15-year mortgages at about 3.5%. Since then, rates have ticked down some, but they are still well above the 2012 lows. As of the week ended Aug. 22, the average 30-year mortgage carried an interest rate of 4.26% and the typical 15-year mortgage was at 3.43%. "It shows you how dependent the mortgage industry really is on refinancing," said Guy Cecala, CEO of Inside Mortgage Finance, an industry publication. Inside Mortgage Finance reported refinancing constituted 36% of the mortgage market in the second quarter, the lowest share since the 1980s, Cecala told SNL. On Aug. 26, the Mortgage Bankers Association released a second-quarter report on independent mortgage banks and mortgage subsidiaries of chartered banks, showing a somewhat similar trend. The report's release only showed a purchase share, as opposed to refinance share, putting the purchase share at 59% in the second quarter for the mortgage industry as a whole. Cecala said that over the last 25 years, the refinance share has generally stayed above 50%. "Are we going to see it back up to 50% any time soon? Not unless rates suddenly drop dramatically, or there's an influx of well-heeled immigrants who we decide to qualify for mortgages — but nothing in the immediate future," he told SNL. Declines in mortgage origination seem to be hitting the largest players the hardest, creating opportunities for nonbanks and smaller banks. For example, Wells Fargo & Co. has seen retail mortgage originations tumble to $14.33 billion in the second quarter, down 71.02% from the $49.46 billion reported in the 2013 second quarter. Meanwhile, nonbank Freedom Mortgage Corp. said July 21 that the company had doubled its monthly volume over the last two years. And Inside Mortgage Finance reported originations for the company totaled $5.72 billion in the second quarter, up 31.1% from the prior-year period. Generally, the weaker origination figures have also translated to declines in the amount of one- to four-family loans sold or held for sale by banks in the second quarter, relative to the prior-year period. The four largest, money-center banks — Wells Fargo, Bank of America Corp., Citigroup Inc. and JPMorgan Chase & Co. — all posted year-over-year declines of larger than 45% for both one- to four-family loans sold off the balance sheet, as well as such loans held for sale. Breaking down the banking industry by asset size, it is clear that declines are hitting the largest players harder. Among bank holding companies with more than $10 billion in assets, residential loans sold in the second quarter totaled $97.66 billion, a decrease of 65.20% year over year in the second quarter, while such loans held for sale fell 42.08%. Among banks with asset size of less than $1 billion, residential loans sold in the quarter totaled $13.75 billion, a decline of 41.41%. Inside Mortgage Finance's Cecala told SNL that the law of large numbers is playing a role — that the banks with the most volume a year ago had the farthest to fall. But he also said the shift toward more purchase activity and less refinancing volume favors smaller lenders. "People buying homes tend to go with real estate agent recommendations, and that tends to be more local lenders," Cecala said. While the year-over-year figures remain dour, the mortgage market showed definite signs of improvement in the second quarter relative to the start of the year. It should be noted that winter is generally the slowest season for home purchases. Among the top five banking originators, as selected based on the most recent data available from the Home Mortgage Disclosure Act, all but one posted a quarter-over-quarter increase in retail mortgage origination in the second quarter, according to Y-9C regulatory filings for the quarter. Mortgage giant Wells Fargo posted a whopping 21.71% gain from the linked quarter, while JPMorgan was the one to post a decline, as its origination volume slipped to $4.70 billion, a 3.85% decline from the linked quarter. The MBA report showed the second-quarter bump in origination volume also carried a return to profitability. The industry group's report, which relies on production data from 349 companies, showed a net gain of $954 on each loan originated in the second quarter, compared to a loss of $194 per loan in the first quarter. Marina Walsh, vice president of industry analysis for MBA, said the swing to profitability was driven by the bump in origination volume, as well as lower expenses. "It was an expense play more than a revenue play," Walsh told SNL. "It largely came from expenses going down after six quarters of going up."   A Resurrection in Problem Loan Sales SNL Financial Report By Nathan Stovall and Salman Aleem Khan The pace of problem loan sales at banks rebounded in the second quarter, reaching the highest level in the last 18 months. After a slow start to 2014, banks' sales of nonaccrual loans rose considerably in the second quarter. Problem loan sales at banks more than tripled in the period, jumping 222.2% from the first quarter and 12.6% from a year earlier. Inflows of nonaccrual loans dropped as well, declining 6.9% from the linked quarter and more than 29.3% from a year ago, according to SNL data. Banks' problem loan sales bounced back even as real estate prices held virtually flat in the second quarter, with U.S. home prices climbing just 0.8% from the linked quarter, according to the Federal Housing Finance Agency. Still, the jump in volume could have come from pent-up demand, with bankers noting that problem loan sales activity was exceptionally slow in the first quarter due to the severe winter. Even at this late stage in the credit cycle, the potential supply of problem loans that could be sold on the market remains considerable. For instance, Compass Point analysts estimate that the supply of nonperforming one- to four-family mortgage loans stood at $305 billion at the end of the second quarter, based on holdings of commercial banks, the Department of Housing and Urban Development and the government-sponsored enterprises. The analysts said pricing on recent sales has reportedly increased, even with home prices holding fairly steady. The higher pricing could lead to increased sales activity, they said. "Given increases in pricing, we would not be surprised to see more supply come to market (and recent activity and press reports indicate this is happening)," Compass Point analysts wrote in an Aug. 26 report. Indeed, banks significantly increased their plans to sell problem loans in the second quarter, reversing a trend witnessed over the last few quarters. Banks reported $110.48 billion in loans classified as held for sale in the second quarter, up 42.5% from $77.51 billion in the linked quarter, SNL data shows. Some banks took opportunities to purge their balance sheets in the second quarter and continued to take hits despite the increase in prices. "On the nonperforming side, I still think for the folks that still have meaningful nonperformers on their balance sheet, I think the bid/ask spread is still pretty wide," said Kenneth Segal, a managing director in the bank and loan advisory group at Situs. "Despite relative recovery in values, there isn't still enough value there to support motivating the folks holding these assets to sell them." Segal, whose firm provides portfolio valuation services and has also recently worked with banks on data population and aggregation services to help with stress testing, told SNL that the spread between investors' bids and banks' carrying values has narrowed some but still remains wide enough to result in losses when banks sell problem loans. "With the nonperformers, particularly for the smaller banks, the bid/ask spread is more narrow than it used to be, but I still think it is sufficiently wide to prevent a lot of people from truly cleaning up their balance sheet without a major capital infusion. It's still relatively challenging for a smaller bank to attract capital," Segal said. One smaller bank that has recapitalized, Sun Bancorp Inc., sold loans at the end of the second quarter as part of a major restructuring initiative. Sun Bancorp noted in an investor presentation in late July that the sales would help lower workout expenses going forward. The company completed a cash sale of $71.4 million of individual commercial loans, resulting in a loss of roughly $11.8 million. Sun Bancorp also moved $24.7 million of nonaccrual and other "low-quality" consumer and related credit to held-for-sale, resulting in an estimated loss of $4 million. Astoria Financial Corp. also recently engaged in sales of problem loans and managed to ink a transaction without incurring significant costs because it had already written down and taken reserves against the loans. In late July, Astoria entered an agreement to sell certain nonperforming residential mortgage loans for consideration of about $186 million, or at roughly 95 cents on the dollar. Other banks could look to clean up their balance sheets and sell foreclosed real estate in the second half of 2014. Old Second Bancorp Inc. COO James Eccher said on the company's second-quarter earnings call in late July that it has not ruled out a bulk sale, and sales activity in general could pick up after a slow start to the year. "We're seeing continued interest in the portfolio. First quarter, I think, it was slower than we'd like, it's probably more the weather than anything. But we do have several properties that we're in current negotiations with," Eccher said on the call, according to the transcript. "We see prices firming up a little bit. We still have about a third of the portfolio in construction-related assets which, as you know, is a little more challenging to move. But we are seeing better interest in some of those properties as well." Some banks are still very hesitant to pursue nonaccrual sales, at least in bulk form. Capital City Bank Group Inc., for example, has long preferred selling foreclosed properties through a retail strategy versus a wholesale strategy. Capital City CFO J. Kimbrough Davis touted that strategy at an investor conference in late July, noting that the company had sold other real estate at 101% of book value over the last 26 quarters. He said holding costs on the properties were currently running at 7%, compared to the average discount of 30% to 40% that the company would receive when pursuing a sale. The hesitation to take such large hits has kept many banks from selling problem loans and foreclosed real estate in recent years. The banking industry is also now seeing problem loan formation slow. SNL data shows that additions to nonaccruals fell again in the second quarter of 2014, dropping 6.9% sequentially to $17.11 billion. This marked the third quarter in a row that nonaccrual additions had fallen below the $20 billion level. That level previously had not been seen since the second The amount of nonaccrual loans in the banking industry has fallen 63% since peaking in the first quarter of 2010, but much of that decline occurred in 2010 and the early part of 2011, when distressed asset sales activity was much higher. SNL data shows that sales activity reached its highest level in the fourth quarter of 2010. Nonaccrual sales totaled $28.71 billion for the whole of 2010. Sales activity fell substantially in 2011, particularly in the latter half of the year when investor sentiment toward banks soured and capital raising slowed. Sales of nonaccrual loans fell to $19.00 billion in 2011, with about 40% of the overall sales activity coming during the last six months of the year, according to SNL data. After a lackluster ending to 2011, nonaccrual sales remained slow in 2012, falling to $15.19 billion — down 20% from the previous year. Nonaccrual sales activity in 2013 proved choppy, but ultimately finished the year at subdued levels. Sales activity was below the $3 billion level in the first quarter, in the third quarter and again in the fourth quarter, totaling $2.99 billion in the last period of the year. Overall nonaccrual sales activity in 2013 fell to $11.81 billion, down about 22% from the previous year. Nonaccrual sales activity plunged even further in the first quarter of 2014, dropping 59% to $1.22 billion. However, after falling to levels not seen since before the credit crisis, nonaccrual sales activity jumped to $3.93 billion in the second quarter. With market conditions holding, there seems some hope that the rebound in sales activity could continue through the remainder of 2014.   Compensation in Equipment Finance Industry Continues to Closely Mirror Business Performance   According to ELFA Survey WASHINGTON, D.C. - Compensation in the equipment finance industry increased modestly in 2013, according to the 2014 Equipment Leasing and Finance Compensation Survey from the Equipment Leasing and Finance Association (ELFA) and McLagan. For the fourth consecutive year, a year-over-year increase in new business volume contributed to increases in compensation, albeit at a slower rate than previous years. The 2014 Equipment Leasing and Finance Compensation Survey measures compensation rates for the 2013 fiscal year as reported by 60 equipment finance companies representing a cross section of the equipment finance sector, including independent, bank and captive leasing and finance companies. Firms provide data for more than 90 executive, front-office and support positions, including a breakdown of salary (for 2013 and 2014), incentives (including cash bonuses and commissions), long-term awards and total compensation by company type. The survey is a collaborative initiative between ELFA and McLagan, a performance/reward consulting and benchmarking firm for the financial services industry. Highlights from the 2014 Equipment Leasing and Finance Compensation Survey include: · Total Compensation: On a “same-store” basis (constant incumbents in multiple survey years), total compensation was flat (+/- 1%) at median for key originations functions from 2012 to 2013. Infrastructure received marginally larger increases at median, ranging from approximately 3–6%. Notably, divisional management fared better than most other functions. The team leader / senior role experienced the greatest year-over-year variability, with many individuals receiving decreases of 20+%, while others received increases of 14+%. · Salary: On a same-store basis, origination roles tended to have slightly lower increases between approximately 2–2.75%. Additionally, more than 25% of incumbents in key origination positions did not receive salary increases year-over-year. Salaries tended to rise between 2–4% for infrastructure roles. · Differences by Level: Increases tended to be larger at the more senior levels (particularly in direct origination and infrastructure). Notably, the team leader / senior level for the direct and vendor origination functions was flat (+/- 1%). · Differences by Firm Type: Generally, banks awarded higher compensation at median relative to captive and independents, particularly for senior roles. Median total compensation and salary compensation rates tended to be comparable (+/- 5%) at lower levels for infrastructure and origination roles. Industry Trends In 2013, new business volume in the U.S. equipment leasing and finance industry increased—for the fourth consecutive year—to levels at or near pre-recession highs. However, the rate of increase slowed in 2013 compared to the significant increases experienced in the previous three years. This trend was not experienced uniformly by all market competitors, as some organizations saw business volume increases while others experienced modest declines. Along with top-line growth, the environment has been marked by heightened competition for deals, which has put pressure on margins. The credit picture, however, remains strong, with low levels of delinquencies and charges offs. The compensation trends in the industry mirror this uneven growth, with compensation linked to industry financial performance over the last year and since the recovery began. About ELFA The Equipment Leasing and Finance Association (ELFA) is the trade association that represents companies in the $827 billion equipment finance sector, which includes financial services companies and manufacturers engaged in financing capital goods. ELFA members are the driving force behind the growth in the commercial equipment finance market and contribute to capital formation in the U.S. and abroad. Its 580 members include independent and captive leasing and finance companies, banks, financial services corporations, broker/packagers and investment banks, as well as manufacturers and service providers. For more information, please visit www.elfaonline.org and follow ELFA on Twitter @elfaonline.   Diversified Capital Credit Corp. Celebrates 20 years Today Has Two Branch Offices Diversified Capital Credit Corp. is celebrating 20 years of incorporation.  Starting in September 1994 in a small office in New Jersey, Diversified has expanded to include branch sales offices in Georgia and Minnesota.  Additionally it has added Health Care Equipment Funding, FotoFunding, Waste Funding and Telco Funding as divisions, as well as developing a number of private label programs for its vendor partners. Bruce Smith “Much has occurred in our industry over the last 20 years” said Bruce Smith, President and owner of Diversified Capital.  “During that time, many other independent equipment finance companies have come and gone. I’m proud of the fact that our business model has allowed us to grow and flourish. Our resiliency and flexibility has enabled us to assist hundreds of vendors sell equipment to thousands of end user customers, even during the recent economic downturn. I’m looking forward to the next 20 years with a lot of optimism.” Through its headquarters in Gillette, NJ, and branch offices, Diversified Capital and its divisions specialize in the implementation of value added leasing and financing programs that assist equipment vendors in their sales efforts. #### Press Release ############################# THERE WAS A BALL GAME SOMEWHERE    by Tim Peeler Before video parlors, PCs and iPads iTouch, Smartphones, on our ragged bicycles We scrambled to one house or the other— Hefners, Peelers, then the Swansons who moved In the neighborhood, sometimes the Coffeys From church, or the Swansons' friends from their church - For the really big affairs with full teams, Baseball games with football scores. Out in the heat Most of the day, just breaking for lunchtime— Easy pitches and little guys taking Big cuts, ghost runners and no catcher, weird Rules like ground rule doubles for balls driven Into the short cow pasture fence in left Or how to play a pop fly that rolled off The eight-sided parsonage roof or smacked The huge oak trees in center field or the Maple in right-center. Barefoot sometimes, always in shorts only, Crew cuts and popsicle stains on our mouths— Before Play Station and VCRs there Was a baseball game somewhere in dust and Sweltering heat, a game to be played by  Our rules only. --- with the permission of the author, from his book of baseball poetry: “Waiting for Godot's First Pitch”    More Poems from Baseball      1609 - Henry Hudson discovered the island of Manhattan.     1709 - The 1st major group of Swiss and German colonists reached the Carolinas.     1752 - This date became September 14th, when Great Britain (including Scotland, Ireland, Wales and the American colonies) officially implemented the Gregorian calendar (developed by Pope Gregory XIII in 1582 to replace the Julian calendar). Actually, all dates we recorded in history were changed; therefore all the dates we celebrated before this change are not the “correct days in history.” They were all converted to this new calendar.     1777 - The first American flag flown in battle was by a detachment of light infantry and cavalry under General William Maxwell at Cooch's Bridge, DE, where they met an advance guard of British and Hessian troops under Generals Richard Howe, Charles Cornwallis, and Wilhelm von Knypahusen.     1783 - The American Revolution Officially ends as the treaty between Britain and the US is signed at Paris, France. The definite treaty of peace was signed by David Hartley, plenipotentiary of Great Britain, and Benjamin Franklin, John Jay, and John Adams of the United States. The treaty was ratified and proclaimed on January 14, 1784. It set the borders of the United States as the Great Lakes (Canada) in the north, Spanish Florida in the south, and the Mississippi River in the west. It also granted the Americans fishing rights off the Newfoundland coast.     1803 - Birthday of Prudence Crandall, born to a Quaker family at Hopkinton, RI.  This American schoolteacher sparked controversy in 1834 with her efforts to educate black girls. When her private academy for girls was boycotted because she admitted a black girl, she started a school for “young ladies and misses of colour.” In two trials (1833 and 1834), she was convicted by State of Connecticut for teaching girls of color but the convictions were set aside by a legal technicality. [Delete-redundant] The white community in the small city where PC lived had objected so openly about one young woman of Black African descent at her school that she announced her intention to open a whole new school for "young ladies and little misses of color." The state legislature then passed a law forbidding the teaching of blacks without local approval that resulted in her arrest and imprisonment. It is estimated that as many as 3,000 "free" Black families were living in Connecticut at the time. All the white families withdrew their children from her school. PC and her family were jeered and stoned in public. She married, perhaps thinking it would afford her protection, but her Baptist minister husband promptly sold her school without her permission and moved the couple to Illinois where she again established a school for young girls. She became a lecturer on abolition, temperance, and woman's suffrage. In 1887 with a resurgence of interest in the anti-slavery movement, the widowed Prudence Crandall was living in poverty in Kansas. The Connecticut General Assembly apologized for the pre-Civil War treatment of her and awarded her a $400-a-year pension. Arguments from her trials were used in the landmark 1954 U.S. Supreme Court desegregation decision Brown v the Board of Education.  She died January 28, 1890 at Elk Falls, KS. http://www.ohwy.com/ct/p/prucramu.htm     1821 - A hurricane made landfall at Long Island, near present-day Kennedy Airport, then moved through western Connecticut. The hurricane produced a record tide at New York City.     1833 - Benjamin H. Day launched the “New York Sun”, the first truly successful penny newspaper in the US. The Sun was sold on sidewalks by newspapers boys. By 1836, the paper was the largest seller in the country with a circulation of 30,000. It was possibly Day's concentration on human interest stories and sensationalism that made his publication a success while efforts a penny papers at Philadelphia and Boston had failed.     1838 - Frederick Douglass, a black man, boarded a train in the slave state of Maryland, dressed as a sailor with borrowed ID papers. He rode the train to Wilmington, Delaware. There he caught a steamboat to Philadelphia, the City of Brotherly Love, which was a free city. There Douglass transferred to a train that took him to New York City -- also a free city. It was in New York that he was helped by the underground railway network to freedom. Frederick Douglass became one of the nation's strongest abolitionists, fighting for the struggle against slavery and one of America's greatest orators. He published the weekly "North Star" which was later titled, "Frederick Douglass' Paper", to reach the black people. It was mostly through his urging that there were black troops serving in the Civil War. His autobiography, "Life and Times", is a narrative classic of escape to freedom. http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/today/sep03.html     1849 - Sarah Orne Jewett’s birthday.  U.S. writer of precision and amazing clarity who wrote reflectively of the life of the New England farmers and fishers. Her best works were in the short story form where her unsentimental revelations of the nuances of life became a much underrated influence on later writers although Willa Cather acknowledged her debt. Her best known story collections are “A White Heron and Other Stories” (1886) and “Deephaven” (1877). Her lifelong partnership with Anne Adams Field was openly described as a "Boston marriage" and was probably the inspiration for the Henry James novel, “The Bostonians”. Her earliest works were signed "Alice Eliot" or "A. C. Eliot." A volume of her poetry was published posthumously. fast-bkasin00-20&keyword=Sarah%20Orne%2dJewett&mode=books     1855 - General William Harney and 700 soldiers take revenge for the Grattan Massacre with a brutal attack on a Sioux village in Nebraska that left 100 men, women, and children dead. The path to Harney's bloody revenge began a year before near Fort Laramie, Wyoming, when a brash young lieutenant named John Grattan and 30 of his men were killed while attempting to arrest a Teton Sioux brave accused of shooting a white man's cow. Despite the many eyewitness reports that Lieutenant Grattan had foolishly threatened the Sioux and practically forced them to attack, the incident quickly gained infamy around the nation as the "Grattan Massacre." Americans demanded swift vengeance, and the army turned to the celebrated Indian fighter, General William Harney, to lead a punitive attack against the Sioux.  One Sioux boy who witnessed the brutal massacre would never forget or forgive and would take his own revenge 21 years later at the Battle of the Little Bighorn. His name was Crazy Horse.     1856 - Birthday of Louis H. Sullivan, famed Chicago architect. (Lower half of http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/today/sep03.html )     1860 - Birthday of Edward Albert Filene, American merchant and philanthropist, at Salem, MA. Established the US credit union movement in 1921. Died at Paris, France, September 26, 1937.     1861 - Confederate forces enter Kentucky, thus ending its neutrality. Due to Kentucky's neutrality policy in the summer of 1861, men wishing to join the Confederacy traveled to Camps Boone and Burnett, near Clarksville, TN. Here, the nucleus of the Orphan Brigade was formed, which later was to be under the command of President Lincoln's brother-in-law Ben Helm. Confederate General Leonidas Polk committed a major political blunder by marching his troops into Columbus, Kentucky, negating Kentucky's avowed neutrality and causing the Unionist legislature to invite the U.S. government to drive the invaders away. Kentucky was heavily divided prior to the war. Although slavery was prevalent in the state, nationalism was strong and Unionists prevented the calling of a convention to consider secession after the firing on Fort Sumter in April. Governor Beriah Magoffin refused to send troops to either side, and a special session of the legislature in the summer of 1861 issued a warning to both the Confederate and Union armies not to deploy forces in the state. Union and Confederates alike recognized the folly of entering Kentucky into the war, as it would tip the delicate political balance to the other side. President Lincoln, a Kentucky native who carefully observed the state's neutrality, soon realized that the Confederates were acquiring resources and recruiting troops from the state. However, in three special elections held that summer, the Union cause had gained support. Kentucky's geographic location made permanent neutrality nearly impossible. The major rivers of the upper south drained into the Ohio River through Kentucky, and the state had the country's ninth largest population. Troops from both sides began to build fortifications along the border in the opening months of the war, but the Confederates made a critical blunder when General Polk occupied Columbus, Kentucky on September 3. This preemptive move against the forces of General Ulysses S. Grant, who waited across the Ohio River in Illinois, proved costly for the Confederates. Kentucky's Unionist legislature invited Federal troops in to drive away the invaders, and on September 6, Grant occupied Paducah and Southland, at the mouths of the Tennessee and Cumberland Rivers, respectively. These were vital positions that allowed the Union a tremendous advantage in the contest for Kentucky and Tennessee. During the war, some 50,000 white and 24,000 black Kentuckians fought for the North, while 35,000 joined the South. http://eserver.org/history/freedmens-bureau.txt     1872 - Louisville, Kentucky was the meeting place of U.S. Democrats. Their national convention convened and a wing of Democrats not wanting to vote for Horace Greely, editor of the New York Tribune, who was officially nominated in Baltimore, MD, nominated Charles O'Conor of New York for President of the United States. He was the first Catholic to be nominated by his party for the office of President. They did not think Greely would win. O'Conor declined the nomination, but his name nevertheless was listed and he received approximately 30,000 votes from 23 states. Ulysses S. Grant was reelected president of the United States, defeating Horace Greeley by an electoral vote of 286 to 66. President Grant received a popular vote of 3,597,132 against 2,384,124 for Greely.     1891 - Cotton pickers organize a union and stage a strike across the state of Texas.     1891 - John Stephens Durham, named minister to Haiti.     1895 - Birthday of NAACP Leader Charles Houston.     1895 - The first professional football game was played in Latrobe, PA. The Latrobe YMCA defeated the Jeannette Athletic Club 12-0.  Latrobe's captain was Harry Ryan and Jeannette's was “Posie” Flowers. Since the regular quarterback was unable to play, John K. Braillier of Indiana, PA, was paid $10 and expenses to fill in. The following year four men were paid, and in 1897, the entire team was paid. Since 1967, St. Vincent’s College in Latrobe has been the home of the Pittsburgh Steelers training camp.     1905 – Birthday of Carl David Anderson, American physicist, Nobel Prize laureate (d. 1991).       1908 - Orville Wright began two weeks of flight trials that impressed onlookers with his complete control of his new Type a Military Flyer. In addition to setting an altitude record of 310 feet and an endurance record of more than one hour, he had carried aloft the first military observer, Lieutenant Frank Lahm.     1913 – Actor and producer Alan Ladd born in Hot Springs, AR.  Ladd died on Jan 29, 1964 at his Palm Springs, CA home.     1915 - Birthday of pianist Memphis Slim, Memphis, TN.     1917 - Grover Cleveland Alexander of the Philadelphia Phillies pitched and won both ends of a doubleheader against the Brooklyn Dodgers. Alexander went the distance in both games, winning the opener, 5-0, and the nightcap, 9-3.     1918 - Nineteen mutinous Black soldiers were hanged and sixty-three received life sentences in federal prison. One was judged incompetent to stand trial. Two white officers faced courts-martial, but they were released.     1923 – Cartoonist Mort Walker’s birthday.     1925 - Birthday of guitarist Hank Thompson, Waco, TX.     1925 – USS Shenandoah the United States' first American-built rigid airship was destroyed in a squall line over Noble County, OH. Fourteen of her 42-man crew perished, including her commander, Zachary Landsdowne.      1926 - Alto sax player Ernie Henry’s Birthday. ?artist=Ernie+Heny     1929 - The Dow Jones industrial average closed at 381.17. It was the peak of the bull market of the 1920s.     1934 - In London, Evangeline Cory Booth, 69, the seventh child of founder William Booth (1829-1912), became the fourth elected commander and the first woman general of the Salvation Army.     1935 - Andrew Varipapa sets bowling record of 2,652 points in 10 games     1940 - Artie Shaw and the Gramercy Five recorded "Summit Ridge Drive" and “Special Delivery Stomp” for Victor Records.     1940 - Drummer Gene Krupa records “Rhum-boogie.”     1941 – Karl Fritsch, deputy camp commandant of the Auschwitz concentration camp, experiments with the use of Zyklon B in the gassing of Soviet POWs.       1942 - Frank Sinatra bid adieu to the Tommy Dorsey Band as he started his solo singing career.     1942 – Birthday of one of The Beach Boys, Al Jardine.     1943 - The Allied invasion of Italy begins on the same day that U.S. General Eisenhower and Italian Marshal Badoglio sign the Armistice of Cassibile aboard the Royal Navy battleship HMS Nelson off Malta.       1944  URBAN, MATT  Medal of Honor Rank and organization: Lieutenant Colonel (then Captain), 2d Battalion, 60th Infantry Regiment, 9th Infantry Division, World War II. Place and date: Renouf, France, 14 June to 3 September 1944. Entered service at: Fort Bragg, North Carolina, 2 July 1941. Date and place of birth: 25 August 1919, Buffalo, New York. Lieutenant Colonel (then Captain) Matt Urban, l 12-22-2414, United States Army, who distinguished himself by a series of bold, heroic actions, exemplified by singularly outstanding combat leadership, personal bravery, and tenacious devotion to duty, during the period 14 June to 3 September 1944 while assigned to the 2d Battalion, 60th Infantry Regiment, 9th Infantry Division. On 14 June, Captain Urban’s company, attacking at Renouf, France, encountered heavy enemy small arms and tank fire. The enemy tanks were unmercifully raking his unit’s positions and inflicting heavy casualties. Captain Urban, realizing that his company was in imminent danger of being decimated, armed himself with a bazooka. He worked his way with an ammo carrier through hedgerows, under a continuing barrage of fire, to a point near the tanks. He brazenly exposed himself to the enemy fire and, firing the bazooka, destroyed both tanks. Responding to Captain Urban’s action, his company moved forward and routed the enemy. Later that same day, still in the attack near Orglandes, Captain Urban was wounded in the leg by direct fire from a 37mm tank-gun. He refused evacuation and continued to lead his company until they moved into defensive positions for the night. At 0500 hours the next day, still in the attack near Orglandes, Captain Urban, though badly wounded, directed his company in another attack. One hour later he was again wounded. Suffering from two wounds, one serious, he was evacuated to England. In mid-July, while recovering from his wounds, he learned of his unit’s severe losses in the hedgerows of Normandy. Realizing his unit’s need for battle-tested leaders, he voluntarily left the hospital and hitchhiked his way back to his unit hear St. Lo, France. Arriving at the 2d Battalion Command Post at 1130 hours, 25 July, he found that his unit had jumped-off at 1100 hours in the first attack of Operation Cobra.” Still limping from his leg wound, Captain Urban made his way forward to retake command of his company. He found his company held up by strong enemy opposition. Two supporting tanks had been destroyed and another, intact but with no tank commander or gunner, was not moving. He located a lieutenant in charge of the support tanks and directed a plan of attack to eliminate the enemy strong-point. The lieutenant and a sergeant were immediately killed by the heavy enemy fire when they tried to mount the tank. Captain Urban, though physically hampered by his leg wound and knowing quick action had to be taken, dashed through the scathing fire and mounted the tank. With enemy bullets ricocheting from the tank, Captain Urban ordered the tank forward and, completely exposed to the enemy fire, manned the machine gun and placed devastating fire on the enemy. His action, in the face of enemy fire, galvanized the battalion into action and they attacked and destroyed the enemy position. On 2 August, Captain Urban was wounded in the chest by shell fragments and, disregarding the recommendation of the Battalion Surgeon, again refused evacuation. On 6 August, Captain Urban became the commander of the 2d Battalion. On 15 August, he was again wounded but remained with his unit. On 3 September, the 2d Battalion was given the mission of establishing a crossing-point on the Meuse River near Heer, Belgium. The enemy planned to stop the advance of the allied Army by concentrating heavy forces at the Meuse. The 2d Battalion, attacking toward the crossing-point, encountered fierce enemy artillery, small arms and mortar fire which stopped the attack. Captain Urban quickly moved from his command post to the lead position of the battalion. Reorganizing the attacking elements, he personally led a charge toward the enemy’s strong-point. As the charge moved across the open terrain, Captain Urban was seriously wounded in the neck. Although unable to talk above a whisper from the paralyzing neck wound, and in danger of losing his life, he refused to be evacuated until the enemy was routed and his battalion had secured the crossing-point on the Meuse River. Captain Urban’s personal leadership, limitless bravery, and repeated extraordinary exposure to enemy fire served as an inspiration to his entire battalion. His valorous and intrepid actions reflect the utmost credit on him and uphold the noble traditions of the United States.       1946 - Founder Sidney N. Correll established United World Mission. This interdenominational agency focuses on evangelism, church planting and Christian education in 13 world countries.   1950-GOMEZ, EDUARDO C.  Medal of Honor Rank and Organization: Sergeant First Class.  U.S. Army. Company 1. 8th Cavalry Regiment, 1st Cavalry Division.  Place and Date: September 3, 1950, Tabu-dong, Korea.  Born: October 28, 1919, Los Angeles, CA.  Departed: Yes (01/29/1972).  Entered Service At:   G.O. Number:   Date of Issue: 03/18/2014.  Accredited To:   Citation:  Then-Sgt. Eduardo Gomez distinguished himself by defending his company as it was ruthlessly attacked by a hostile force. Notably, Gomez maneuvered across open ground to successfully assault a manned tank. Wounded during his retreat from the tank, Gomez refused medical attention, instead manning his post and firing upon the enemy until his company formed a defensive perimeter. 1950 - A U.S. Military Assistance Advisory Group (MAAG) of 35 men arrives in Saigon to screen French requests for American military aid, assist in the training of South Vietnamese troops, and advise on strategy. President Harry Truman had approved National Security Council (NSC) Memorandum 64 in March 1950, proclaiming that French Indochina (Vietnam, Cambodia, and Laos) was a key area that could not be allowed to fall to the communists and that the United States would provide support against communist aggression in the area. However, NSC 64 did not identify who would receive the aid, the French or the South Vietnamese. The French did not want the aid to go directly to the South Vietnamese and opposed the presence of any American advisory group. Nevertheless, the U.S. government argued that such a team would be necessary to coordinate requisitioning, procurement, and dissemination of supplies and equipment. Accordingly, an advisory group was dispatched to Saigon. In the long run, however, the French high command ignored the MAAG in formulating strategy, denied them any role in training the Vietnamese, and refused to keep them informed of current operations and future plans. By 1952, the United States would bear roughly one-third of the cost of the war the French were fighting, but find itself with very little influence over French military policy in Southeast Asia or the way the war was waged. Ultimately, the French would be defeated at the battle of Dien Bien Phu and withdraw from Vietnam, passing the torch to the United States. In 1964, MAAG Vietnam would be disbanded and its advisory mission and functions integrated into the U.S. Military Assistance Command Vietnam (MACV), which had been established in February 1962. 1950--OUELLETTE, JOSEPH R.  Medal of Honor Rank and organization: Private First Class, U.S. Army, Company H, 9th Infantry Regiment, 2d Infantry Division. Place and date: Near Yongsan, Korea, from 31 August to 3 September 1950. Entered service at: Lowell, Mass. Birth: Lowell, Mass. G.O. No.: 25, 25 April 1951. Citation: Pfc. Ouellette distinguished himself by conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity in action against the enemy in the Makioug-Chang River salient. When an enemy assault cut off and surrounded his unit he voluntarily made a reconnaissance of a nearby hill under intense enemy fire to locate friendly troop positions and obtain information of the enemy’s strength and location. Finding that friendly troops were not on the hill, he worked his way back to his unit under heavy fire. Later, when an airdrop of water was made outside the perimeter, he again braved enemy fire in an attempt to retrieve water for his unit. Finding the dropped cans broken and devoid of water, he returned to his unit. His heroic attempt greatly increased his comrades’ morale. When ammunition and grenades ran low, Pfc. Ouellette again slipped out of the perimeter to collect these from the enemy dead. After collecting grenades he was attacked by an enemy soldier. He killed this enemy in hand-to-hand combat, gathered up the ammunition, and returned to his unit. When the enemy attacked on 3 September, they assaulted his position with grenades. On 6 occasions Pfc. Ouellette leaped from his foxhole to escape exploding grenades. In doing so, he had to face enemy small-arms fire. He continued his resistance, despite a severe wound, until he lost his life. The extraordinary heroism and intrepidity displayed by Pfc. Ouellette reflect the highest credit on himself and are in keeping with the esteemed traditions of the military service. 1951--WATKINS, TRAVIS E.  Medal of Honor Rank and organization: Master Sergeant, U.S. Army, Company H, 9th Infantry Regiment, 2d Infantry Division Place and date: Near Yongsan, Korea, 31 August through 3 September 1950. Entered service at: Texas. Birth: Waldo, Ark. G.O. No.: 9, 16 February 1951. Citation: M/Sgt. Watkins distinguished himself by conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity above and beyond the call of duty in action against the enemy. When an overwhelming enemy force broke through and isolated 30 men of his unit, he took command, established a perimeter defense and directed action which repelled continuous, fanatical enemy assaults. With his group completely surrounded and cut off, he moved from foxhole to foxhole exposing himself to enemy fire, giving instructions and offering encouragement to his men. Later when the need for ammunition and grenades became critical he shot 2 enemy soldiers 50 yards outside the perimeter and went out alone for their ammunition and weapons. As he picked up their weapons he was attacked by 3 others and wounded. Returning their fire he killed all 3 and gathering up the weapons of the 5 enemy dead returned to his amazed comrades. During a later assault, 6 enemy soldiers gained a defiladed spot and began to throw grenades into the perimeter making it untenable. Realizing the desperate situation and disregarding his wound he rose from his foxhole to engage them with rifle fire. Although immediately hit by a burst from an enemy machine gun he continued to fire until he had killed the grenade throwers. With this threat eliminated he collapsed and despite being paralyzed from the waist down, encouraged his men to hold on. He refused all food, saving it for his comrades, and when it became apparent that help would not arrive in time to hold the position ordered his men to escape to friendly lines. Refusing evacuation as his hopeless condition would burden his comrades, he remained in his position and cheerfully wished them luck. Through his aggressive leadership and intrepid actions, this small force destroyed nearly 500 of the enemy before abandoning their position. M/Sgt. Watkins’ sustained personal bravery and noble self-sacrifice reflect the highest glory upon himself and is in keeping with the esteemed traditions of the U.S. Army.     1951 - What was to become the longest-running TV serial (or soap opera) was seen for the first time. "Search for Tomorrow" debuted on CBS-TV.         1952 - KRZYZOWSKI, EDWARD C.  Medal of Honor Rank and organization: Captain, U.S. Army, Company B, 9th Infantry Regiment, 2d Infantry Division. Place and date: Near Tondul, Korea, from 31 August to 3 September 1951. Entered service at: Cicero, Ill. Born: 16 January 1914, Chicago, Ill. G.O. No.: 56, 12 June 1952. Citation: Capt. Krzyzowski, distinguished himself by conspicuous gallantry and indomitable courage above and beyond the call of duty in action against the enemy as commanding officer of Company B. Spearheading an assault against strongly defended Hill 700, his company came under vicious crossfire and grenade attack from enemy bunkers. Creeping up the fire-swept hill, he personally eliminated 1 bunker with his grenades and wiped out a second with carbine fire. Forced to retire to more tenable positions for the night, the company, led by Capt. Krzyzowski, resumed the attack the following day, gaining several hundred yards and inflicting numerous casualties. Overwhelmed by the numerically superior hostile force, he ordered his men to evacuate the wounded and move back. Providing protective fire for their safe withdrawal, he was wounded again by grenade fragments, but refused evacuation and continued to direct the defense. On 3 September, he led his valiant unit in another assault which overran several hostile positions, but again the company was pinned down by murderous fire. Courageously advancing alone to an open knoll to plot mortar concentrations against the hill, he was killed instantly by an enemy sniper’s fire. Capt. Krzyzowski’s consummate fortitude, heroic leadership, and gallant self-sacrifice, so clearly demonstrated throughout 3 days of bitter combat, reflect the highest credit and lasting glory on himself, the infantry, and the U.S. Army.     1952 - Top Hits “Auf Wiedersehn, Sweetheart” - Vera Lynn “Walkin' My Baby Back Home” - Johnnie Ray “Half as Much” - Rosemary Clooney “It Wasn't God Who Made Honky Tonk Angels” - Kitty Wells     1953 - The temperature at Erie, PA reached 99 degrees, and Stroudsburg, PA established a state record for September with a reading of 106 degrees.     1954 - "The Lone Ranger" was heard on radio for the final time after 2,956 episodes spanning 21 years. Many of the original ABC radio shows later became available through syndication and can still be heard on stations brave enough to air dramas in today's radio world of talk and music.     1955 - Mitch Miller's "The Yellow Rose Of Texas" hits #1     1955 - Bill Haley & the Comets turn down their first invitation to tour outside of the U.S. because of a fear of flying. The Australian offer of $2,000 for 15 dates wasn't enough to get them on a plane.     1956 - Birthday of Douglas Williams (Williams Bros ), Smithdale, MS.     1957 - The Milwaukee Braves' Warren Spahn's 8-0 blanking of the Cubs sets major league shutout record for lefties with 41.     1960 - Top Hits “It's Now or Never” - Elvis Presley “Walk, Don't Run” - The Ventures “The Twist” - Chubby Checker “Alabam” - Cowboy Copas     1963 - Reprise Records, owned by Frank Sinatra, became part of Warner Brothers Records. The ‘Chairman of the Board' continued to record for the label.     1963 - Birthday of American composer Steve Markowitz, Santa Monica, CA.     1965 – “Wild Thing” Charlie Sheen’s birthday, born Carlos Irwin Estévez in NYC.     1965 - In preparation of their move to Anaheim, the Los Angeles Angels change their name to the California Angels.     1966 – “The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet'' television series ends after 14 years.     1966 - The Four Tops "Reach Out I'll be There" enters the Hot 100 where it claims the Number One position on October 15.     1966 - Donovan's "Sunshine Superman" hits #1 on the chart, while Stevie Wonder's "Blowin' in the Wind" peaks at #9.     1966 - Question Mark and the Mysterians' "96 Tears" makes into the Hot 100 where it will peak at Number One for a week on October 29.     1967 - After 17 years, "What's My Line" aired for the final time on CBS-TV. The host of the show was John Daly. Panelists on the first show were: Dorothy Kilgallen, Louis Untermeyer, Dr. Richard Hoffman and New Jersey Governor Harold Hoffman. Arlene Francis and Bennett Cerf joined the show a short time later. Kilgallen, Cerf and Francis were the continuing regulars for fifteen years. Fred Allen, Hal Block and Steve Allen served as panelists for short stints at different times.     1968 - Top Hits “People Got to Be Free” - The Rascals “Born to Be Wild” - Steppenwolf “Light My Fire” - Jose Feliciano “Mama Tried” - Merle Haggard     1969 - The Four Seasons' "I've Got You Under My Skin" is released.     1970 - Outfielder Billy Williams of the Chicago Cubs asked to be taken out of the starting lineup, breaking his consecutive games played streak of 1,117, a National League record until Steve Garvey broke it in 1983.         1971 - The Watergate team broke into Daniel Ellsberg’s psychiatrist’s office     1973 - David Pearson became the first racecar driver to earn one million dollars in career earnings. Pearson finished second in the Southern 500 stock-car race in Darlington, SC. Other drivers to make the big bucks at the time were Richard Petty, A.J. Foyt, Al Unser, Sr. and Mario Andretti.     1973 - The Rolling Stones' "Angie" is released.     1976 - The American Viking 2 spacecraft lands on Mars and takes the first close-up color photographs of the moon’s surface.       1976 - Top Hits “Don't Go Breaking My Heart” - Elton John & Kiki Dee “You Should Be Dancing” - Bee Gees “Let 'Em In” - Wings “(I'm A) Stand by My Woman Man” - Ronnie Milsap     1977 - Heart's "Barracuda" peaks at #11 on the pop singles chart.     1977 - Styx' "The Grand Illusion" LP enters the charts.     1978 - No. 1 Billboard Pop Hit: “Boogie Oogie Oogie,'' A Taste of Honey. The group wins a Grammy as best new artist.     1981 - The Red Sox and the Mariners play nineteen innings to a 7-7 tie. The game ends with the Mariners winning 8-7 in 20 innings when the suspended game is resumed the next day making it the longest game played in Fenway Park's history.     1982 - The three day U.S. Festival gets under way in San Bernardino, California. Over 400,000 people show up to hear Fleetwood Mac, the Police, Jackson Browne, Tom Petty, the Grateful Dead, the Cars, Pat Benatar, Talking Heads, Dave Edmunds, Santana, the B-52's, the Kinks, Eddie Money, the Ramones, Gang of Four, the English Beat and Jerry Jeff Walker. It's financed by Steve Wozniak, the co-founder of the Apple Computer Company.     1983 - The Eurhythmics "Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)" hits #1 on the pop singles chart.     1984 - Jerry Lewis smashed all previous records for charity fund-raising. A total of $32,074,566 was pledged on the annual "Labor Day Telethon" for the Muscular Dystrophy Association.     1984 - Bruce Sutter of the St. Louis Cardinals set a National League record by earning his 38th save of the season. Three hurlers had previously held the record, Clay Carroll, Rollie Fingers and Sutter, with 37 saves. The Cardinals defeated the New York Mets, 7-3.     1984 - Top Hits “What's Love Got to Do with It” - Tina Turner “Missing You” - John Waite “Stuck on You” - Lionel Richie “Let's Fall to Pieces Together” - George Strait     1986 - Peat Marwick International and Klynveld Main Goerdeler of the Netherlands agreed to merge, forming the world's largest accounting firm.     1988 - Sixteen cities in the northwestern U.S. reported record high temperatures for the date. Highs of 89 degrees at Stampede Pass, WA and 116 degrees at Redding, CA established records for the month of September. Readings of 98 degrees at Spokane, WA and 100 degrees at Yakima, WA equaled records for September.     1990 - 9th no-hitter of 1990: Blue Jay Dave Steib beats Cleveland 3-0      1990 - Relief pitcher Bobby Thigpen of the Chicago White Sox set a major league record for most saves in a season when he chalked up his 47th save in a 4-2 White Sox victory over the Kansas City Royals. Thigpen finished the season with 57 saves.     1992 - Jerry Lewis' 27th Muscular Dystrophy telethon raises $45,759,368      1993 - Top Hits “Can’t Help Falling In Love” (From "Sliver") - UB40 “Dreamlover”- Mariah Carey

i don't know

In golf, what is the opposite of a slice (a shot that curves toward the side of the swing)?

Golf Slice | Cure A Slice Best Online Golf Instruction Resource Available Getting back to the golf side of things, let’s discuss briefly how a slice and a hook come to be. Where does that spin originate? Obviously you know that the only contact your club has with the ball is at impact, correct? And the only time you can impart spin on the ball is at that impact point. So the problem lies in the angle in which your club face strikes the ball and the direction in which your club is swinging (inside or outside) through the ball.   Let’s first start with the “outside-in” swing path. You’re most accustomed to this anyway if you’ve read this far. But let’s define what we mean by inside and outside so that we’re all in understanding. When you address the ball, the space between yourself and the ball is referred to as the inside, while the space on the opposite side of the ball from yourself is labeled the outside. And if you were to draw a line directly from the ball to your target and extend that line in the opposite direction behind the ball, this will determine whether you’re on the inside or the outside of the ball. On the “outside-in” path, you can probably imagine that your club head during your downswing toward the ball is on the outside of that imaginary line we drew and then strikes the ball and then your club head finishes through the impact zon e on the inside of the ball. This seems like the correct remedy to hit the ball to the left doesn’t it? Most golfers believe that. But most golfers don’t understand the physics and the science of the golf swing. Contrary to what most golfers who slice the ball believe, by hitting the ball with this approach, this ultimately sends the ball to the right. It may seem that by cutting across the ball (another term that is used in conjunction with slicing or the “outside-in” swing) you will hit the ball to the left. Many of you are able to start the ball toward the left, but the spin that is on the ball ultimately curves the ball to the right leaving you with a shot that is short and in the rough on the right side. On the golf hook page on this site, I illustrate just how spin is put on the golf ball at impact, and the factors that go into making the ball spin the way it does, to the left or the right. You can also go to the swing drill page that I talk about weight transfer to see how the lack of weight shift from your right to left side at impact and follow through will keep your ball slicing and never have a chance to turn over to the left.   In order to hit the ball straight, or with a draw, you have to be committed to the swing. You have to complete the entire swing. The swing can't stop or get lazy at impact. I notice that happening with a number of people that I get paired up with when I go out and play. They are almost wishing the ball to go left. Golf swings that are tentative and scared will consistently have trouble with hitting the ball with a slice. You can't go just half way and hit and hope.   You have to bring your follow through all the way around your body and rotate you hips and rotate the club around on a proper swing plane . So many slicers just quit as soon as the ball is struck. They finish high and never completely rotate around and transfer their weight. You've seen the tour players on TV, they all finish on the their left side as this graphic shows. Too many slicers of the golf ball, never get to this position, and all too often stay on the right side or flat footed, off balance or even falling backwards at impact.   Many golfers who slice the ball suffer from a reverse pivot, which is pretty much like it sounds, the reverse or inverse of what you should do on your backswing. In the backswing, instead of your spine angle being behind the ball, it actually drifts the opposite way and shifts in front of the ball. So when at the top of the swing, the only way to get the club back to the ball is to shift your weight backwards to where it should've been in the first place. And this move shifts your weight back behind the ball at impact, and results in a huge lack of distance, and more often than not, a nasty slice, because the weight can't be transferred to the left side, and the proper hip and shoulder rotation can't take place physically. It's impossible. If you are one that struggles with a "reverse pivot", you need to revamp your swing, and start over to see the results that you want.   I would strongly encourage those that slice the ball, and especially if you have a reverse pivot, to get your hands on this full swing golf video (you can view a sample of that video below) that will start from the very beginning and mold a golf swing to how it should be done. Bobby Eldridge has been a golf pro teaching the golf swing for over 30 years and really addresses every aspect of the swing and the importance that it has. He'll lay the foundation that you can build solidly on.   Do yourself a favor, and invest a little bit of money to get this DVD, because it will change the way you swing the golf club, and it will bring enjoyment to the game of golf that you may not have experienced before. The foundation to your swing is the most important, and building it properly reduces having to compensate for parts of your swing that are lacking. When this happens, you're constantly chasing the lagging part of your swing, and this results in hurting the parts of your swing that are done properly. So have Bobby explain this to you from the start, and mold your swing the right way. This is an investment into your golf game that is well overdue if you've come this far. Purchase this video , you won't regret it.   Subscribe to Blog via Email Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. Email Address

Hook

Two letters in American Sign Language require movement. Name either one.

Never Slice Again - Golf.com | Golf.com Never Slice Again More Fore! We — all of us — have been slicing the ball since back in the days when golfers were still a curiosity to sheep. And the slice hasn't been made obsolete by technology. In fact, as clubs get longer and as players swing faster (isn't that what Tiger does?), slices are now flying with increased severity and regularity. We know this because you've told us. In a recent golf.com poll, 70 percent of you confessed that slicing is your greatest golf sin. Slices are impossible to control, ugly and the single biggest wrecker of scorecards in the game. What's even worse is that slices result from swing errors that will always — and we mean always — keep your game grinding in second gear. There is no magic club that will make your slice go away for good, but there is a way to fix your swing to make banana balls disappear. What follows is a plan to systematically turn your swing inside-out and straighten your slice for good. Top 100 Teachers Darrell Kestner, Michael Breed and David Glenz will show you how to... 1) Quit coming over the top 2) Square your clubface 3) Do both at the same time Could it be that stopping your slice is as easy as 1-2-3? Turns out the answer is yes. Read on to find out how. Which slice is your slice? The first step to stopping your slice is to determine which type of slice is destroying your game. That way you'll know if you have to correct your face angle at impact, your downswing path or both. The Straight Slice Your path is solid but your clubface is open at impact. The ball starts straight, then curves. The Pull Slice Your path is outside-in and your clubface is open. The ball starts left, then curves right. The Push Slice Your path is too inside-out and your clubface is open. The ball starts right, then curves further right. Why You're in the Woods Our slice-prone test robot proves that open clubfaces and out-to-in swings wreak left-to-right havoc in equal amounts. Or do they? There are nine discrete ball flights. Each results from unique path/face positions at impact, with the path (relative to the target line) dictating direction, and face angle (relative to the path) dictating curve. For example, to hit a pull slice your club must cross to the left of your target line th rough impact with your face open relative to the path. This makes perfect sense until you watch a robot hit a few hundred slices and chart the results. With the help of renowned gear tester Golf Laboratories (golflabs.com), we did just that and found an answer to the age-old slice question: What comes first — the face or the path? An open clubface at impact can send your ball way off to the right even if your path is perfect. In fact, leaving your clubface open a mere 1.5 degrees can put you close to 70 feet right of your target. We expected that outcome, but we re surprised to learn that you can add 30 more feet of slice with the same clubface angle and a swing that's just slightly out-to-in (to the tune of 5 degrees). Now you're really in the woods (even though the ball started left of center). An open face is dangerous, but the out-to-in swing path is the far more lethal swing flaw. That's why it's Step 1 in our 3-step plan to set your game straight. Straight Shooters Tour pros count the number of slices they hit in a season on one hand, and offer some good advice to help you do likewise. Jim Furyk Driving accuracy 73.5% (6th on Tour) "Most people try to fix a slice by hitting the ball straight. You'd be better off hitting a really big draw or a hook and working your ball back to straight. If you try to take a slice and work it back to straight it's never going to get there." Zach Johnson Driving accuracy: 68.8% (28th on Tour) "The farther you line up left of your target, the farther you'll hit it to the right. With that being said, you've almost got to feel like you're swinging toward right field and putting some hook spin on your ball." Corey Pavin Driving accuracy: 68.7% (30th on Tour) "Shift your weight properly so when you get to the top of your backswing your weight is on your right foot. As you go through the ball get your weight back over to your left side. At the end of your swing, you should have 90% of your weight on your left foot." Step 1: Fix Your Path Call it over-the-top or outside-in — the path your club traces when it moves from the top to impact and then left of your target line must be corrected, or you will always slice. Ideally, your clubhead should approach the ball on a path that's slightly inside ofyour target line. You may be guilty of over-rotating your shoulders from the top or stopping your rotation too early, causing your arms to fling across the line. Either way, the following drills will help you turn that slice-causing swipe into a powerful hit. Drop your right foot Force yourself to swing inside-out by dropping your right foot back. The Drill: Drop your right foot back 10 inches at address. Force yourself to swing along your toes (in-out), and then adopt that swing to your normal stance. What It Does: It exaggerates an in-to-out path, and aggressive measures are needed to break bad habits. Stay Connected The Drill: Swing an impact bag (or any weighted object that won't break when dropped) behind you, then toss it forward. YES: Turn back and through keeping your left arm and chest connected. NO: Lose the connection and go from out (left) to in (right). What It Does: It grooves an anti-cut motion. Keep your left arm connected to your chest as you swing back, and maintain that connection until you release the bag to the right of the target line. Hit a Home Run The Drill: Address a ball in the middle of your stance, then leaving your right foot in place move your left foot back until your feet touch. Swing to the top and on the way down move your left foot back to its original position. Make contact with both feet on the ground. What It Does: This baseball-type swing forces you to begin your downswing with your lower body, which sets up an inside-out sequence (lower body, shoulders, arms, hands and then clubhead). Hit the Center The Drill: Place three balls diagonally as shown and swing. Try to contact only the center ball. The only way to do this is to swing on an inside-out path. If you come over the top, you'll definitely hit the ball on the left, and maybe even all three balls. What It Does: The "gate" created by the three balls is excellent for seeing what inside-out looks like through impact, and seeing is believing. Hit the Wall The Drill: Bring a club to the top of your swing so the clubhead touches a wall directly behind you. Then, bring your arms down to the mid-downswing position and make sure the clubhead is still touching the wall. Swing to the top (left) ... maintain contact (center) and never do this. What It Does: Slicers turn their shoulders too aggressively to start the downswing. The wall drill helps you "slot" the club by sliding your left arm down and across your chest while keeping your club on plane. How to Think Away Your Slice Avoid the mental pitfalls of the left-to-right shot By Richard Coop, Ph.D., GOLF Magazine's mental-game and performance consultant. Fixing a major swing flaw is generally not an option once you tee off-it usually just makes matters worse. If your slice is out of control during your round, however, here are your best bets for reeling it in. Adjust your mindset If you're sure your next shot is headed right, then trying to make pars is going to get disheartening. So change your personal par for that round. Mentally play for bogey-or even double-on every hole, and you'll start to feel rewarded when you avoid those triples and Xs. Don't force shots If you've got 150 yards to the pin, and you normally hit a 7-iron, take a 6-iron, or even a 5, and swing at 75 percent. Throttling back will not only lessen the effects of your swing flaw, it will also relax you and allow you to work your way methodically from tee to green. Forget the hole Make getting your ball on the green your goal-everything else is gravy. Aim for the left half of the green (or the center of the green if there's trouble on the left) and let your putter do the rest. Rediscover tempo Forget your mechanics for now-they're already on the fritz. Instead, concentrate on making a smooth, pendulum swing on every shot. You may find that when you stop paying attention, your mechanics will find their way back. STEP 2: Fix Your Face A clubface that's open a mere .75 of a degree can send your ball 10 yards off target (see our robot data on page 103). Such a small margin for error means that once you have your path where you want it, you need to focus on face angle at impact. Open Face Syndrome runs rampant among so many players for one reason alone: most of us don't know where the clubface "looks" during the swing. The key to squaring the face at impact is to gain greater control of it at every point in your motion. The following drills will help you do just that. CONTROL SETUP Guide your right hand up to the handle for greater control and a square setup. Square up before you start up The Drill: Check your address position in a mirror. If your right hand is on top of the grip (instead of on the side), you're set up to produce a slice. Take your right hand off the grip, let your right arm hang loose at your side, then smoothly move it up toward the handle and retake your grip. What It Does: It encourages a stronger right-hand hold for greater clubhead control, and it sets your shoulders square to your target line. In the photo above, notice how the right-hand-on-top position forces my shoulders to open, pre-programming an outside-in swing. Get square at the top for square impact The Drill: Swing to the top and hold that position. If you're a slicer, the clubface is probably pointing at the ground. Try varying amounts of left and right wrist bend to match the face angle to your swing path. OPEN: Adding left wrist cup opens the face and requires perfect timing to get square at impact. SQUARE: With very few exceptions, solid ball strikers have a flat left wrist at the top position. CLOSED: An overly bowed left wrist (or an excessively bent right) closes the face. Fore, left! What It Does: If you're square to your path at the top (same face and shoulder angles), chances are you'll be square at the bottom. Cupping your left wrist (or bowing your right) at the top is a big no-no. Be square at impact The Drill: Place a box slightly ahead of where you'd normally play your ball. From address, move your club forward and try to knock the box straight ahead. You can only do this if you keep your clubface square as it moves down the line. Set up to knock the box straight. Closed face and out-to-in. Open face and in-to-out. What It Does: It provides visual feedback that you can use to mend your clubface position and path at the bottom of your swing. If you hit the box to the right, you opened your clubface or pushed your club too far to the right. Blend arm swing and body turn The Drill: Clamp your hands against a clipboard and make a mock backswing. At the mid-back position, the clipboard should lay on a 45 degree angle. Use a clipboard to sync-up your backswing. If the board is at 45°, then your face is square and your club is on plane. What It Does: It grooves an antislice backswing. Most slicers whip the club too far to the inside then simply raise their arms to the top, opening the face (the board will lay flat if you do this). A proper backswing blends arm swing and body turn in equal amounts. Blast a tee More active hands can help you better square your face. The Drill: Place a tee in the ground until just the cap is above the turf. Make your normal backswing with an iron and then try to blast the tee out of the ground. What It Does: It activates your hands to square up the face at impact and also produces a strong downward blow. Stack your deck The Drill: Stop your swing at impact and check your positions. Make sure your body is "stacked" (shoulders above knees, knees above feet). NO: A reverse pivot increases the chances of an open face. YES: Get stacked to square your face naturally and without effort. What It Does: It makes sure that you're not stuck on your right side, and that you are in a powerful impact position. This stacked arrangement allows a natural squaring of the face. If you hang back too long on your right side, your face will be open at impact. A Slice of History Who started this left-to-right mess anyway? The exact origin of the term slice to describe the game's most famous malady is cloaked in a Highlands fog. We do know that it failed to make the printed edition of The Golfer's Manual (1857). However, the following entry indicates that even your great-great-grandfather might have lost a featherie or two in the right gorse: "Let the novice hold the club tightly with both hands and then try to swing. The grip is too firm, making everything too stiff, causing the ball go to the right." Peruse the "Temporary Faults" chapter of Sir Walter Simpson's The Art of Golf (1887) and you'll discover shots that "skanked" to the right were common. These Victorian-age slices resulted from "pulling the arms in or throwing oneself back." Sound familiar? By the late 19th century, slice officially entered the golf vernacular. The "Glossary of Technical Terms" in William Park Jr.'s The Game of Golf (1896) includes "Slice: To draw the face of the club across the ball in the act of hitting it, resulting that it will travel with a curve towards the right." The June 1902 issue of The Golfer includes an account of an 1856 foursomes match between Old Tom Morris and his mentor Allan Robertson, each with an amateur partner. The story recounts how Morris was forced to watch helplessly as his partner "sliced" a drive into the heather bordering the Old Course at St. Andrews. Morris then responded with a slice of his own-an intentional one-that found its mark and allowed the pair to win the hole. In 1908, American Golfer published an instructional piece in which Jerome Travers, winner of four U.S. Amateur championships and a U.S. Open, advised golfers to adjust stance, ball position and hand action to prevent the unwanted slice. Old Tom Morris The slice has affected golfers of all ages and skill levels, but its most famous victim may have also been its most powerful-President Dwight Eisenhower. Eisenhower's tee shots routinely started 30 yards to the left and spun wildly back to the right. Ike's slice left its mark on golf history at Augusta National, where he beseeched club chairman Clifford Roberts to remove a pine tree that stood on the left side of the 17th fairway. The tree bedeviled Eisenhower, as he needed the room on the left to maneuver his slice into the fairway. Roberts famously refused the president. Today, the pine has grown into a magnificent tree (named the Eisenhower Pine) that plants the seed of doubt into the best golfers in the world during The Masters. Lee Trevino made slicing cool in the 1970s, and his famous line, "You can talk to a slice, but a hook won't listen," gave golf's most vilified foozle some legitimacy. But even today, with all of our technological resources, the slice still claims victims. Just ask Phil Mickelson, who sliced his final tee shot at the 2006 U.S. Open onto a beer tent on his way to a double bogey that cost him the championship. For anyone who has ever struggled with the banana ball, the irony was rich. After all, Mickelson had literally sliced his ball onto a tent selling what many consider the most effective tonic ever devised to combat the slice-a stiff drink to help you forget all about it. - Tom Ferrel (Special thanks to Top 100 Teacher Michael Hebron) The Top 100 Sound Off on Slicing Our experts on what's wrong and how to fix it Jane Frost Sandwich Hills GC, East Sandwhich, Mass. David Phillips Titleist Performance Institute, Oceanside, Calif. Carol Preisinger Kiawah Island Club, Kiawah Island, S.C. Why do golfers slice? Too much emphasis on the "grip it and rip it" mentality that trickles from the Tour's big hitters to less-skilled amateurs. In a recent study of 379 golfers we found that 44% of them came over the top. That's why the slice problem is as prevalent as ever. Grips are too weak and too tight with the handle in the palm there's no chance of releasing the club through impact. How do they make it worse? They squeeze the life out of the club and swing for the fences. A light grip pressure and even tempo is needed to properly square the face. To quit coming over the top you must lead your downswing with your lower body, which requires a level of flexibility most golfers don't own. Slicers know they must swing in-to-out, but if they don't release the clubhead they'll hit a push fade. Now they're really confused. Your best slice tip? Glue a tee to a magnet and place it in the center of your clubface, then make slow-motion swings to learn where your face points during all points of your swing. Improve your core stability. This will help you maintain dynamic posture. Without it, your torso and arms will dominate and bring your clubhead across the target line. Hold your club like you'd hold a briefcase (in your fingers) with a light pressure. Make a baseball swing and feel how your forearms cross over. That's what you're after. Step 3: Get it in Sync You've got your path ironed out and your face is as square as the yell leader at M.I.T. All that's left to do is combine the two for a slice-busting swing. By adding just a few additional must-have elements to your motion, the in-out swing and square face at contact you've worked hard to achieve will happen naturally and without effort. Try the following to pull it all together and kick that slice to the curb. Where your right palm points, so does your face. Use it as a guide to keep your face square to the line during your swing. Fight for your right Fact: Your clubface points in the same direction as your right hand. This is never more relevant than just prior to impact. At this point, your right hand (and clubface) should face the ball. If you're solid here, all it takes is a full turn through the ball to produce straight, powerful shots. Stay in your shoes If you overswing even slightly, you're left to depend on impeccable timing and luck to make square contact. Strive for a more compact motion-one that you can control. You'll get more power from centered contact than you will from a big swing with an impact out toward the heel or toe. [STYLE "YES:" "spotlighttitle"] Allow your flexibility level to determine backswing length. [STYLE "NO:" "spotlighttitle"] If your left hand can't reach your right, your swing is too long. Pull your pocket When you stop your hips in your downswing, your arms fling past your body and across the target line-a bad thing. An easy way to feel proper hip turn is to pull on your right pants pocket with your left hand. That powerful and aggressive turn through impact is exactly what you need to keep your club on the proper plane. Hinge your wrists Poor wrist hinge can open your face quicker than almost anything else. Avoid hinging upward during your takeaway. In a good full swing your wrists cock laterally, especially at the start. Your arm swing and elbow fold do the work to get your club upward. The swing in the mirror Your through-swing is a mirror image of your backswing. Look at your elbow and wrist positions. In your backswing, your right arm is folded and your left wrist is flat. In your through-swing, your left arm is folded and your right wrist is flat. Sometimes breaking the golf motion down to its simplest parts is all you need to get on plane and square. Backswing basics: Flat left wrist, bent right elbow Through-swing basics: The reverse of your backswing Stay centered The middle of your sternum is your swing center, and your path goes awry and your face position falls out of whack when you don't swing around it. To learn to swing around your center (and on plane), place the grip against your belt buckle and wrap your hands around the shaft. Make a swing and feel the connection between your arms and your torso. That's "keeping your club in front" and is one of the true hallmarks of a high-level swing. The center of your sternum is the center of your swing. Never get in front of it or behind it. Put Your Clubs to Work Four gear changes you can make to stop your slice today 1. Hook up your face If your woods are designed with a square face angle (like most clubs are), you'll benefit from a custom fitting for woods with a closed (aka "hook") face angle. This directly offsets the effects of an open face. 2. Add some offset "Offset" means that the shaft of the club is in front of the clubhead. This will give you a split second more to keep the rotation of your hands and arms going so that the clubface arrives at impact less open than it would with a conventional wood. 3. Shorten the shaft By going an inch or two shorter with your driver, you'll find it much easier to reduce your outside-in swing path, which should automatically reduce the severity of your slice. However, if you shorten your existing driver, be sure to add weight back to the head to re-establish the swing weight-otherwise, you'll make your slice much worse! 4. Order a combo If you're staring at a 30- to 40-yard banana ball on most of your shots, and you're not willing or able to put in the time to fix your swing, a driver with a more closed face angle and an offset hosel, along with a shorter shaft, should definitely reduce the severity of your slice. By Tom Wishon Posted: Mon Mar. 12, 2007 Updated: Sat Nov. 29, 2014 Install App Fore! We — all of us — have been slicing the ball since back in the days when golfers were still a curiosity to sheep. And the slice hasn't been made obsolete by technology. In fact, as clubs get longer and as players swing faster (isn't that what Tiger does?), slices are now flying with increased severity and regularity. We know this because you've told us. In a recent golf.com poll, 70 percent of you confessed that slicing is your greatest golf sin. Slices are impossible to control, ugly and the single biggest wrecker of scorecards in the game. What's even worse is that slices result from swing errors that will always — and we mean always — keep your game grinding in second gear. There is no magic club that will make your slice go away for good, but there is a way to fix your swing to make banana balls disappear. What follows is a plan to systematically turn your swing inside-out and straighten your slice for good. Top 100 Teachers Darrell Kestner, Michael Breed and David Glenz will show you how to... 1) Quit coming over the top 2) Square your clubface 3) Do both at the same time Could it be that stopping your slice is as easy as 1-2-3? Turns out the answer is yes. Read on to find out how. Which slice is your slice? The first step to stopping your slice is to determine which type of slice is destroying your game. That way you'll know if you have to correct your face angle at impact, your downswing path or both. The Straight Slice Your path is solid but your clubface is open at impact. The ball starts straight, then curves. The Pull Slice Your path is outside-in and your clubface is open. The ball starts left, then curves right. The Push Slice Your path is too inside-out and your clubface is open. The ball starts right, then curves further right. Why You're in the Woods Our slice-prone test robot proves that open clubfaces and out-to-in swings wreak left-to-right havoc in equal amounts. Or do they? There are nine discrete ball flights. Each results from unique path/face positions at impact, with the path (relative to the target line) dictating direction, and face angle (relative to the path) dictating curve. For example, to hit a pull slice your club must cross to the left of your target line th rough impact with your face open relative to the path. This makes perfect sense until you watch a robot hit a few hundred slices and chart the results. With the help of renowned gear tester Golf Laboratories (golflabs.com), we did just that and found an answer to the age-old slice question: What comes first — the face or the path? An open clubface at impact can send your ball way off to the right even if your path is perfect. In fact, leaving your clubface open a mere 1.5 degrees can put you close to 70 feet right of your target. We expected that outcome, but we re surprised to learn that you can add 30 more feet of slice with the same clubface angle and a swing that's just slightly out-to-in (to the tune of 5 degrees). Now you're really in the woods (even though the ball started left of center). An open face is dangerous, but the out-to-in swing path is the far more lethal swing flaw. That's why it's Step 1 in our 3-step plan to set your game straight. Straight Shooters Tour pros count the number of slices they hit in a season on one hand, and offer some good advice to help you do likewise. Jim Furyk Driving accuracy 73.5% (6th on Tour) "Most people try to fix a slice by hitting the ball straight. You'd be better off hitting a really big draw or a hook and working your ball back to straight. If you try to take a slice and work it back to straight it's never going to get there." Zach Johnson Driving accuracy: 68.8% (28th on Tour) "The farther you line up left of your target, the farther you'll hit it to the right. With that being said, you've almost got to feel like you're swinging toward right field and putting some hook spin on your ball." Corey Pavin Driving accuracy: 68.7% (30th on Tour) "Shift your weight properly so when you get to the top of your backswing your weight is on your right foot. As you go through the ball get your weight back over to your left side. At the end of your swing, you should have 90% of your weight on your left foot." Step 1: Fix Your Path Call it over-the-top or outside-in — the path your club traces when it moves from the top to impact and then left of your target line must be corrected, or you will always slice. Ideally, your clubhead should approach the ball on a path that's slightly inside ofyour target line. You may be guilty of over-rotating your shoulders from the top or stopping your rotation too early, causing your arms to fling across the line. Either way, the following drills will help you turn that slice-causing swipe into a powerful hit. Drop your right foot Force yourself to swing inside-out by dropping your right foot back. The Drill: Drop your right foot back 10 inches at address. Force yourself to swing along your toes (in-out), and then adopt that swing to your normal stance. What It Does: It exaggerates an in-to-out path, and aggressive measures are needed to break bad habits. Stay Connected The Drill: Swing an impact bag (or any weighted object that won't break when dropped) behind you, then toss it forward. YES: Turn back and through keeping your left arm and chest connected. NO: Lose the connection and go from out (left) to in (right). What It Does: It grooves an anti-cut motion. Keep your left arm connected to your chest as you swing back, and maintain that connection until you release the bag to the right of the target line. Hit a Home Run The Drill: Address a ball in the middle of your stance, then leaving your right foot in place move your left foot back until your feet touch. Swing to the top and on the way down move your left foot back to its original position. Make contact with both feet on the ground. What It Does: This baseball-type swing forces you to begin your downswing with your lower body, which sets up an inside-out sequence (lower body, shoulders, arms, hands and then clubhead). Hit the Center The Drill: Place three balls diagonally as shown and swing. Try to contact only the center ball. The only way to do this is to swing on an inside-out path. If you come over the top, you'll definitely hit the ball on the left, and maybe even all three balls. What It Does: The "gate" created by the three balls is excellent for seeing what inside-out looks like through impact, and seeing is believing. Hit the Wall The Drill: Bring a club to the top of your swing so the clubhead touches a wall directly behind you. Then, bring your arms down to the mid-downswing position and make sure the clubhead is still touching the wall. Swing to the top (left) ... maintain contact (center) and never do this. What It Does: Slicers turn their shoulders too aggressively to start the downswing. The wall drill helps you "slot" the club by sliding your left arm down and across your chest while keeping your club on plane. How to Think Away Your Slice Avoid the mental pitfalls of the left-to-right shot By Richard Coop, Ph.D., GOLF Magazine's mental-game and performance consultant. Fixing a major swing flaw is generally not an option once you tee off-it usually just makes matters worse. If your slice is out of control during your round, however, here are your best bets for reeling it in. Adjust your mindset If you're sure your next shot is headed right, then trying to make pars is going to get disheartening. So change your personal par for that round. Mentally play for bogey-or even double-on every hole, and you'll start to feel rewarded when you avoid those triples and Xs. Don't force shots If you've got 150 yards to the pin, and you normally hit a 7-iron, take a 6-iron, or even a 5, and swing at 75 percent. Throttling back will not only lessen the effects of your swing flaw, it will also relax you and allow you to work your way methodically from tee to green. Forget the hole Make getting your ball on the green your goal-everything else is gravy. Aim for the left half of the green (or the center of the green if there's trouble on the left) and let your putter do the rest. Rediscover tempo Forget your mechanics for now-they're already on the fritz. Instead, concentrate on making a smooth, pendulum swing on every shot. You may find that when you stop paying attention, your mechanics will find their way back. STEP 2: Fix Your Face A clubface that's open a mere .75 of a degree can send your ball 10 yards off target (see our robot data on page 103). Such a small margin for error means that once you have your path where you want it, you need to focus on face angle at impact. Open Face Syndrome runs rampant among so many players for one reason alone: most of us don't know where the clubface "looks" during the swing. The key to squaring the face at impact is to gain greater control of it at every point in your motion. The following drills will help you do just that. CONTROL SETUP Guide your right hand up to the handle for greater control and a square setup. Square up before you start up The Drill: Check your address position in a mirror. If your right hand is on top of the grip (instead of on the side), you're set up to produce a slice. Take your right hand off the grip, let your right arm hang loose at your side, then smoothly move it up toward the handle and retake your grip. What It Does: It encourages a stronger right-hand hold for greater clubhead control, and it sets your shoulders square to your target line. In the photo above, notice how the right-hand-on-top position forces my shoulders to open, pre-programming an outside-in swing. Get square at the top for square impact The Drill: Swing to the top and hold that position. If you're a slicer, the clubface is probably pointing at the ground. Try varying amounts of left and right wrist bend to match the face angle to your swing path. OPEN: Adding left wrist cup opens the face and requires perfect timing to get square at impact. SQUARE: With very few exceptions, solid ball strikers have a flat left wrist at the top position. CLOSED: An overly bowed left wrist (or an excessively bent right) closes the face. Fore, left! What It Does: If you're square to your path at the top (same face and shoulder angles), chances are you'll be square at the bottom. Cupping your left wrist (or bowing your right) at the top is a big no-no. Be square at impact The Drill: Place a box slightly ahead of where you'd normally play your ball. From address, move your club forward and try to knock the box straight ahead. You can only do this if you keep your clubface square as it moves down the line. Set up to knock the box straight. Closed face and out-to-in. Open face and in-to-out. What It Does: It provides visual feedback that you can use to mend your clubface position and path at the bottom of your swing. If you hit the box to the right, you opened your clubface or pushed your club too far to the right. Blend arm swing and body turn The Drill: Clamp your hands against a clipboard and make a mock backswing. At the mid-back position, the clipboard should lay on a 45 degree angle. Use a clipboard to sync-up your backswing. If the board is at 45°, then your face is square and your club is on plane. What It Does: It grooves an antislice backswing. Most slicers whip the club too far to the inside then simply raise their arms to the top, opening the face (the board will lay flat if you do this). A proper backswing blends arm swing and body turn in equal amounts. Blast a tee More active hands can help you better square your face. The Drill: Place a tee in the ground until just the cap is above the turf. Make your normal backswing with an iron and then try to blast the tee out of the ground. What It Does: It activates your hands to square up the face at impact and also produces a strong downward blow. Stack your deck The Drill: Stop your swing at impact and check your positions. Make sure your body is "stacked" (shoulders above knees, knees above feet). NO: A reverse pivot increases the chances of an open face. YES: Get stacked to square your face naturally and without effort. What It Does: It makes sure that you're not stuck on your right side, and that you are in a powerful impact position. This stacked arrangement allows a natural squaring of the face. If you hang back too long on your right side, your face will be open at impact. A Slice of History Who started this left-to-right mess anyway? The exact origin of the term slice to describe the game's most famous malady is cloaked in a Highlands fog. We do know that it failed to make the printed edition of The Golfer's Manual (1857). However, the following entry indicates that even your great-great-grandfather might have lost a featherie or two in the right gorse: "Let the novice hold the club tightly with both hands and then try to swing. The grip is too firm, making everything too stiff, causing the ball go to the right." Peruse the "Temporary Faults" chapter of Sir Walter Simpson's The Art of Golf (1887) and you'll discover shots that "skanked" to the right were common. These Victorian-age slices resulted from "pulling the arms in or throwing oneself back." Sound familiar? By the late 19th century, slice officially entered the golf vernacular. The "Glossary of Technical Terms" in William Park Jr.'s The Game of Golf (1896) includes "Slice: To draw the face of the club across the ball in the act of hitting it, resulting that it will travel with a curve towards the right." The June 1902 issue of The Golfer includes an account of an 1856 foursomes match between Old Tom Morris and his mentor Allan Robertson, each with an amateur partner. The story recounts how Morris was forced to watch helplessly as his partner "sliced" a drive into the heather bordering the Old Course at St. Andrews. Morris then responded with a slice of his own-an intentional one-that found its mark and allowed the pair to win the hole. In 1908, American Golfer published an instructional piece in which Jerome Travers, winner of four U.S. Amateur championships and a U.S. Open, advised golfers to adjust stance, ball position and hand action to prevent the unwanted slice. Old Tom Morris The slice has affected golfers of all ages and skill levels, but its most famous victim may have also been its most powerful-President Dwight Eisenhower. Eisenhower's tee shots routinely started 30 yards to the left and spun wildly back to the right. Ike's slice left its mark on golf history at Augusta National, where he beseeched club chairman Clifford Roberts to remove a pine tree that stood on the left side of the 17th fairway. The tree bedeviled Eisenhower, as he needed the room on the left to maneuver his slice into the fairway. Roberts famously refused the president. Today, the pine has grown into a magnificent tree (named the Eisenhower Pine) that plants the seed of doubt into the best golfers in the world during The Masters. Lee Trevino made slicing cool in the 1970s, and his famous line, "You can talk to a slice, but a hook won't listen," gave golf's most vilified foozle some legitimacy. But even today, with all of our technological resources, the slice still claims victims. Just ask Phil Mickelson, who sliced his final tee shot at the 2006 U.S. Open onto a beer tent on his way to a double bogey that cost him the championship. For anyone who has ever struggled with the banana ball, the irony was rich. After all, Mickelson had literally sliced his ball onto a tent selling what many consider the most effective tonic ever devised to combat the slice-a stiff drink to help you forget all about it. - Tom Ferrel (Special thanks to Top 100 Teacher Michael Hebron) The Top 100 Sound Off on Slicing Our experts on what's wrong and how to fix it Jane Frost Sandwich Hills GC, East Sandwhich, Mass. David Phillips Titleist Performance Institute, Oceanside, Calif. Carol Preisinger

i don't know

Especially devastating in Seattle, what fast food chain was at the center of an E. Coli outbreak in 1993?

17-Month-old Is 3d Child to Die Of Illness Linked to Tainted Meat - NYTimes.com 17-Month-old Is 3d Child to Die Of Illness Linked to Tainted Meat Published: February 22, 1993 SEATTLE, Feb. 21— A boy whose parents appeared on President Clinton's "town meeting" in Michigan this month has become the third person to die from an outbreak of E. coli bacteria poisoning traced to hamburgers at a fast-food chain. The boy, 17-month-old Riley Detwiler, died Saturday at Seattle Children's Hospital from respiratory failure brought on by an infection with the E. coli bacteria, doctors said. His parents, Darin and Vicki Detwiler, appeared on Mr. Clinton's "town meeting" on Feb. 11 to ask the President to move quickly on health reform and to improve the nation's system of meat inspection. Riley's death is the third linked to an outbreak of E. coli infection that began in early January and has caused more than 450 people in Washington State to become ill. Cases Tied to Fast-Food Chain According to the state health department, 94 percent of the cases have been tied to Jack in the Box restaurants, a fast-food hamburger chain owned by Foodmaker Inc. of San Diego. State health officials said frozen hamburger patties from the Jack in the Box restaurants were found to be heavily contaminated with E. coli bacteria. Investigators also found that the chain was undercooking the patties. The Detwilers contend that their son was infected by the bacteria at his day-care center by a less severely infected child who had eaten at Jack in the Box. State health officials say there have been about 50 cases involving people who became infected after contact with someone who had been infected from eating the contaminated meat. Health officials have said that washing the hands, especially after using the toilet, is a sure way to prevent the spread of the infection. During the "town meeting," Vicki Detwiler told the President that the family faced a staggering health bill because her husband had lost his job and the family's medical insurance two days before their son became infected. Riley "was just a little boy who was very much loved," the Detwilers said in a statement issued by the hospital. "His time came too soon." They said they hoped that "his illness has raised issues of food safety, personal hygiene and national health care that will serve to bring about the changes where they are needed." Approximately 50 Cases The first victim of the food-poisoning outbreak was Michael Nole, 2, of Tacoma, Wash., who died Jan. 22 of renal failure caused by the bacteria. The child had eaten a hamburger from an Jack in the Box outlet. Another child, Celina Shribbs, 2, of Seattle, died Jan. 28 at Children's Hospital as the result of an E. coli infection. The source of her infection has not been determined. Four other children remain hospitalized, including one in critical condition, Children's Hospital said. Jack in the Box has promised to pay the medical expenses of anyone who has become ill because of the outbreak, including those with secondary infections. Total medical costs for all cases of the infection at all affected hospitals, "may be in the $1 million range," said Dr. John Neff, the medical director of Children's Hospital. Photo: Riley Detwiler, shown recently with his parents, Vicki and Darin, at Seattle Children's Hospital, died Saturday. Doctors said he died from respiratory failure brought on by an infection of E. coli bacteria. (Associated Press)  

Jack in the Box

The Pro Football Hall of Fame opened its doors on Sept 7, 1963, in what Midwestern city?

Team of Rivals or Game of Thrones - Chipotle Hires Top Food Safety Experts | Marler Blog Home > Lawyer Op-Ed > Team of Rivals or Game of Thrones – Chipotle Hires Top Food Safety Experts Team of Rivals or Game of Thrones – Chipotle Hires Top Food Safety Experts Posted By Bill Marler on May 11, 2016 Hello from Chicago and the Food Safety Summit. Reuters reported late last night that Chipotle Mexican Grill (CMG.N) has retained two (additional) leading food safety experts – including a critic of the burrito chain’s early response to disease outbreaks last year – as it redoubles its efforts to guard against health scares. David Acheson, a former official at the U.S. Food and Drug Administration and the U.S. Department of Agriculture, was brought on as an adviser, Chipotle told Reuters. The company also confirmed it is working with David Theno, a food safety consultant and former Jack in the Box executive who is credited with fixing food safety at the fast-food chain following a deadly E. coli outbreak in the 1990s. The two are respected among food safety experts, and their involvement may signal an expansion in Chipotle’s reforms. But the scope is not yet clear. In March, the company announced it had hired James Marsden, a former meat science professor at Kansas State University, as executive director of food safety. Chipotle’s initial response emphasized testing ingredients for pathogens with the goal of stopping any source of illness from getting into its restaurants. The company touted a testing regime set up by another consultant, Mansour Samadpour, chief executive of IEH Laboratories & Consulting Group. A few other top safety gurus weighed in: “If I had to put together a dream team to fix something, you could do a lot worse,” said Don Schaffner, a food science professor at Rutgers University. But, he added: “I’ve begun to wonder a little bit about too many cooks. Each of those guys is going to have a perspective on what to do to fix the problem.” Michael Doyle, director of the Center for Food Safety at the University of Georgia, said he expected the group’s focus “would likely be more on food safety preventive controls and less on food testing.” It is going to be interesting to see how this shakes out.  It does remind me a bit of something I wrote several months ago – “12 Steps to Food Safety.”   Honestly, Chipotle still has some work to do. Were I  the CEO of a 1,900-store restaurant chain with 45,000 employees (with a CEO-to-worker pay ratio of 1522:1), and just had six foodborne illness outbreaks in six months, what would I do this coming Monday morning?Frankly, with my stock price in free fall – losing $6 billion in value in less than two months – just staying in bed in the fetal position might be welcome.   However, I did not get to be a multi-millionaire hiding in bed. So, here are the things you would see me doing starting  bright and early Monday morning. Park my large ego. Monetary success can and does breed a sense of otherness – especially when the core of your business culture is that your brand of “integrity” is better than your competitors. With a crisis of this proportion facing the company going humble is not a bad thing. It is time to be as open as possible. Why was the July E. coli outbreak in Seattle kept from the public by both public health and the company? What did I learn in the August Salmonella outbreak in Minnesota and the Norovirus outbreak in California? Could have being open and learning from these three outbreaks have prevented the next two E. coli outbreaks and the Norovirus outbreak that has nearly brought my company to its knees? It is time to have a culture of food safety added to the “integrity” of the food. I have now learned that bacteria and viruses do not care a whit if my food’s ingredients are organic, sustainable, non-GMO and humanely raised. I am going to make mandatory reading Benedict’s book  “Poisoned”  and Yannis’s book  “Food Safety Culture.” I am going to hire a vice-president of Food Safety. That person will report directly to me and to the Board of Directors. Like Dave Theno being brought in to address the Jack-in-the-Box crisis of 1993, this person will have the resources and access to decision makers to create a culture of food safety from the top down. With input from the new vice-president, we will hire the consultants and experts necessary to create a sustainable food safety program that brings even more meaning to our core value of “food with integrity.” I would invite input from regulators, academics, public health officials, and yes, the public to add to and critic the new food safety program. The company’s new mantra – “Safe Food with Integrity” – will be completely transparent and shared with all – including our competitors. I am going to rehire the two Boston employees fired last week and instead fire someone in management that allowed the company to drift into a position that allowed these outbreaks to occur. I am likely not going to fire myself, but I certainly will take a cut in pay to $1 a year until the ship gets off the rocks – same with the existing top management. I will stop “shooting the messengers.” This crisis was not caused by public health announcements (one could argue in fact had the July outbreak been announced perhaps all others would have been avoided) or the coverage by the media. We like it when public health covers for us and when the press fawns, its time to grow up and take the good with the less so. Hit the reset button. Shut every store and open them only when each store is actually ready – not just “deep cleaned” – but ready from a structural and management (food safety culture) perspective. Invite the customers back with open arms – they will come back.

i don't know

“There’s a sucker born every minute” is a phrase erroneously attributed to what famous showman?

There’s a sucker born every minute. P.T. Barnum | Dictionary of Quotes There’s a sucker born every minute. P.T. Barnum There’s a sucker born every minute. P.T. Barnum In a minute there is time for decisions and revisions which… In a minute there is time for decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse. -T. S. Eliot "Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it… "Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity." - Albert Einstein "Character isn’t something you were born with and "Character isn't something you were born with and can't change, like your fingerprints. It's something you weren't born with and must take responsibility for forming." - Jim Rohn 6 réponses à “There’s a sucker born every minute. P.T. Barnum” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/There%27s_a_sucker_b … There's a sucker born every minute" is a phrase often credited to P.T. Barnum (1810 – 1891), an American showman. It is generally taken to mean that there are (and always will be) a lot of gullible people in the world. When Barnum's biographer tried to track down when Barnum had uttered this phrase, all of Barnum's friends and acquaintances told him it was out of character. Barnum's credo was more along the lines of "there's a customer born every minute" — he wanted to find ways to draw new customers in all the time because competition was fierce and people could become bored easily.[citation needed] While some sources claim the quote is most likely from famous con-man Joseph ("Paper Collar Joe") Bessimer,[1], other sources say it was actually uttered by David Hannum, spoken in reference to Barnum's part in the Cardiff Giant hoax. Hannum, who was exhibiting the "original" giant and had unsuccessfully sued Barnum for exhibiting a copy and claiming it was the original, was referring to the crowds continuing to pay to see Barnum's exhibit even after both it and the original had been proven to be fakes. In turn, Barnum's fellow circus owner and arch-rival Adam Forepaugh attributed the quote to Barnum in a newspaper interview in an attempt to discredit him. However, Barnum never denied making the quote. It is said that he thanked Forepaugh for the free publicity he had given him.[citation needed] Yet another source credits late 1860s Chicago "bounty broker, saloon and gambling-house keeper, eminent politician, and dispenser of cheating privileges…" Michael Cassius McDonald as the originator of the aphorism. According to the book Gem of the Prairie: Chicago Underworld (1940) by Herbert Asbury, when McDonald was equipping his gambling house known as The Store (at Clark and Monroe Streets in Chicago) his partner Harry Lawrence expressed concern over the large number of roulette wheels and faro tables being installed and their ability to get enough players to play the games. McDonald then allegedly said, "Don't worry about that, there's a sucker born every minute

P. T. Barnum

On September 7, 1927, what American inventor demonstrated the world's first working television system with electronic scanning of both the pickup and display devices?

July 2016 - History - U.S. Census Bureau Visit https://www.census.gov/history every month for the latest Census History Home Page! U.S. Census Bureau History: P.T. Barnum July 5 marks the 206th birthday of American showman, entrepreneur, and founder of the Barnum & Bailey Circus, P.T. Barnum. Photo courtesy of the Library of Congress. July 5 marks the 206th birthday of legendary entrepreneur, showman, and politician Phineas Taylor "P.T." Barnum. Born in Bethel, CT , in 1810, Barnum began his professional career as operator of a general store and founded a weekly newspaper—The Herald of Freedom—in Danbury, CT , in 1831. In 1835, he launched a career in show business (and good-natured fibbing) with the exhibition of Joice Heth, a woman he claimed was the 160-year-old former slave and nurse to President George Washington. Following her death in 1836, Barnum sold tickets to Heth's autopsy and reluctantly admitted the hoax when the doctors proved she was much younger than claimed. In the years that followed, Barnum purchased curiosities and hired performers to draw crowds to his traveling shows and New York City, NY , museum. In 1871, he founded "P.T. Barnum's Grand Traveling Museum, Menagerie, Caravan & Hippodrome" in Brooklyn, NY . After merging with James Bailey's London Circus in 1881, it became "P.T. Barnum's Greatest Show On Earth, And the Great London Circus, Sanger's Royal British Menagerie and The Grand International Allied Shows United." Shortened to "Barnum & Bailey Greatest Show on Earth" in 1887, it was the largest circus in the world and first to feature three show rings. In 1919, Barnum & Bailey merged with "Ringling Bros. World's Greatest Shows," creating the "Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus." In addition to his showmanship career, Barnum was also an ardent abolitionist who served two terms in the Connecticut state legislature representing Fairfield, CT (1865–1869), and mayor of Bridgeport, CT (1875–1876). In Bridgeport, he improved the city's water and gas utilities and established Bridgeport Hospital , serving as its first president in 1878. He died in his sleep in 1891 and is buried at Bridgeport's Mountain Grove Cemetery, which Barnum designed in 1849. You can learn more about P.T. Barnum, the acts he made famous, and the circus using data collected by the U.S. Census Bureau and other federal agencies. For example: P.T. Barnum sought out interesting attractions to draw people to his shows. Some of these included hoaxes like the "FeeJee Mermaid" (half monkey, half fish sewn together) and an unauthorized replica of the "Cardiff Giant" (a carved statue purported to be a petrified giant). Human attractions included General Tom Thumb ( Charles Stratton ) who stood 25 inches tall and weighed 15 pounds; conjoined twins Chang and Eng Bunker ; Commodore Nutt ( George Washington Morrison Nutt ), who stood 29 inches tall; Little Queen Mab ( Nellie Keeler ), who was 35 inches tall and weighed just 11 pounds; The Thin Man, Isaac Sprague , who weighed just 46 pounds despite his 5 foot 6 inch frame; and Jenny Lind, a Swedish opera star billed as "The Greatest Singer in the World" according to her 1850 Census record . The Ringling Brothers— Albert , Augustus , Otto , Alfred , Charles , John , and Henry Ringling — of Baraboo, WI , purchased the Barnum & Bailey Circus in 1907. They operated the Ringling Brothers and the Barnum & Bailey Circuses separately until merging the two in 1919. Today, the Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey Circus, headquartered in Ellenton, Manatee County , FL, bills itself as "The Greatest Show on Earth." Gibsonton , a census designated place in Hillsborough County, FL , is famous as a wintering town for circus performers. Some of the town's residents included Grady Stiles Jr. , Aurelio "Al" Tomaini , and Priscilla Lauther . Many of the towns businesses are run by wintering and retired performers and the town's zoning laws permit residents to keep circus trailers and elephants on their front lawn. Today, Gibsonton is home to the largest organization for people in the outdoor amusement industry—the International Independent Showmen's Association . The saying, "There's a sucker born every minute," is erroneously attributed to P.T. Barnum. Some scholars believe the saying originated with David Hannum in reference to Barnum's Cardiff Giant hoax. Although it is difficult to determine the population of "suckers," the Census Bureau's population clock estimates that about eight people are born every minute in the United States. It may be difficult to resist buying peanuts or popcorn at the circus. According to the National Peanut Board , Georgia, Florida, and Alabama grew 70 percent of the nation's peanuts, and the U.S. Department of Agriculture reported that American farmers grew 785.7 million pounds of popcorn in 2012. The Ringling Brothers—Albert, Augustus, Otto, Alfred, Charles, John, and Henry Ringling— of Baraboo, WI , purchased the Barnum & Bailey Circus in 1907. They operated the Ringling Brothers and the Barnum & Bailey Circuses separately until merging the two in 1919. Today, the Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey Circus, headquartered in Ellenton, Manatee County , FL, bills itself as "The Greatest Show on Earth." Photo courtesy of the Library of Congress.

i don't know

Sept 10, 1963 saw the birth of what former Mariner, and Geico pitch man, known as The Big Unit?

20 Pitchers That Define the Seattle Mariners | Bleacher Report 20 Pitchers That Define the Seattle Mariners Use your ← → (arrow) keys to browse the slideshow 8.0K 9 Comments Pitchers and catchers have reported to Spring Training and opening day is just around the corner. In Arizona, Felix Hernandez and Cliff Lee have the baseball world abuzz with anticipation of the impact they can make on the landscape of Seattle baseball. Will they answer the call to arms with a team monopoly in the pursuit of the American League Cy Young Award? Will they struggle or suffer injuries and fail to achieve the lofty predictions of their fans? Regardless of the overall accomplishments of the two-headed beast atop the Mariner’s pitching rotation, 2010 will be a year that leaves a lasting impression on the history of Seattle baseball, for better or for worse. Be it good, bad, or ugly, many pitchers have left their mark on the maturation of the Seattle Mariners during their 33-year lifespan (34 including the one year existence of the Seattle Pilots). Some pitchers were unbelievably successful and helped launch the organization to new heights. Randy Johnson and Jamie Moyer exemplify the quirkiness and individuality the northwest part of the country is renowned for. They also set new standards for all future M’s pitchers to aspire to. Others have been so abysmal that fans dare not speak their names or repeat their feats of agony. Steve Trout, Heathcliff Slocomb, Bobby Ayala, Matt Young, and Mike Morgan surely made some positive contributions, but their defining moments with the Mariners are not something they would voluntarily share with their grandchildren at the dinner table. Some pitchers had little to contribute directly to the team, but indirectly added colorful chapters to the ever-growing book of history that defines the depths of Mariner’s pith and pity over the years. Gaylord Perry and Diego Segui have their places reserved in the Mariners Hall of Fame, but not because of substantial career achievements in Seattle. In this chronological tale, share the joy, the tears, the laughter, and the absurdity of the 20 pitchers who helped make the Mariners who they are today and will forever live in the memories of Mariners' fans. Next » 20. It’s like Déjà Vu all over again, and again Right-handed pitcher Diego Segui broke into the majors with the Kansas City Athletics in 1962. After limited success with Kansas City/Oakland, Segui sported a 42-59 overall record when joining the expansion Seattle Pilots in 1969. He pitched in relief in the inaugural game for the Pilots, earning a hold during the first win of Seattle’s MLB history. At the end of the season, the Pilots were purchased by Bud Selig and relocated to Milwaukee, leading to a lawsuit against MLB. Seattle's Kingdome was built in anticipation of acquiring both MLB and NFL franchises, and the Seattle Mariners were born (again?) in 1977. The starting pitcher for the Mariner’s inaugural game was a familiar link to the past. Diego Segui took the mound and lost 7-0 to the California Angels. Both the ’69 Pilots and ’77 Mariners finished with the same 64-98 record. Segui had his best career year statistically with the Pilots, going 12-6 with a 3.35 ERA. He had his worst career year statistically with the Mariners going 0-7 in 40 games (just 8 starts). Diego Segui’s only season with the Mariners was his final season in the Majors as he ended his career with a sub-par 92-111 overall record. However, Segui again played a part in Seattle franchise history as his son David played for the Mariners, continuing the father/son history Ken Griffey Sr. and Jr. created in the early 90’s. Unlike its predecessors, history was unkind to the Segui family in regards to Mariner team success. Sandwiched between the “Refuse to Lose” team of 1995 and the 2000 team that barely made the playoffs, the M’s had two losing seasons, while David played for Seattle from 1998-1999. He did his part in 1998, with arguably his best overall year: 19 home runs, 84 RBI, and a .305 batting average. David Segui later tested positive for a banned substance, casting doubt on his two best years of 1997 in Montreal and 1998 with Seattle. Diego Segui will hold a special place in the hearts of Seattle fans for his unique status as probably the only person that will ever have played in two inaugural games for two different franchises. However, from start to finish, the Segui name is way too much of a connection to the struggles of beginning a new franchise (twice) and how the continued success is difficult to sustain. Next » 19. Sometimes Moore is Less Seattle had the first overall pick in the 1981 MLB Draft and chose a promising young right-hander named Mike Moore. The franchise was just five seasons old when Moore made it to the big leagues in 1982. Big Mike did not make an immediate impact, as he finished the year 7-14 with a 5.36 ERA in 144 innings. In fact, Moore was hardly ever an impact player with the Mariners, as he started a disturbing trend of Seattle pitchers who struggled in the Emerald City only to find success with other franchises. Matt Young was Moore’s teammate with the Mariners between 1983 and 1988, and they both share the Seattle-franchise record of 19 losses in one season. Young also lost 18 games in 1990. In 1992, the Red Sox and Indians played a doubleheader. Young, now playing for Boston, got the start in the first game. He placed his name in the annals of MLB history with an “unrecognized” no-hitter because he only pitched eight innings. Young took the loss as Cleveland scored two runs on seven walks and a Red Sox error. Roger Clemens pitched the second game and got a win with a two-hitter. The doubleheader is still a Major League record for the least number of total hits by an opponent in a two game set. Mike Moore is more relevant in his successes after life in Seattle. A workhorse pitcher, he had moments of brilliance. His best year with Seattle was 1985, as he went 17-11 with a 3.46 ERA, pitching 14 complete games and 247 innings. Overall, he never really turned the corner, as he had double-digit losses in all six of the full seasons he played with the Mariners. On Sept. 17, 1988, Moore pitched one of the classic games in Mariners’ history, firing a two-hitter and walking none while striking out eight. Both hits were erased by double plays and it remains the only game in Seattle history in which a pitcher faced the minimum 27 batters. Mike Moore is the Yen and Yang of Mariners history: the good and the bad, the hope and the sorrow. He ranks fifth all-time in wins for the Mariners, but ranks first in losses. He ranks first in complete games, third in innings pitched and fourth in strikeouts. He also ranks 26th in ERA and last in hits allowed and losses in a single season. Moore left the Mariners after the 1988 season with a 66-96 record and a 4.38 ERA. In 1989, he joined the Oakland Athletics and promptly showed his true potential with an all-star season that saw him go 19-11 with a 2.61 ERA. He picked up two victories in the A’s World Series win over the San Francisco Giants in the “Earthquake Series.” Moore also pitched for the A’s in their 1990 World Series loss to Lou Piniella’s Cincinnati Reds. Piniella and Reds’ reliever Norm Charlton would later join the Mariners. Maybe that was the Karma the M’s needed to reverse the curse of the Mike Moore era in Seattle: Adding members of the team that knocked him back down to earth to start their own tradition of winning. Apparently, it worked as the Mariners’ first taste of winning occurred in the ‘90s. Moore is still considered a huge reason why the Mariners improved in the 80s, sometimes even flirting with a .500 record. But he is a sore subject with Mariners' fans who saw him flourish with their division rivals. Next » 18. Meet the Fockers Only in the Movies can the name Gaylord be more popular than baseball legend and Hall-of-Famer, Gaylord Perry. In the movie “Meet the Parents” we were introduced to Gaylord Focker, played by Ben Stiller, who is a bumbling mess of nerves around his fiancé’s Ex-CIA father. Gaylord Perry had his own movie plots at times. It was rumored in 1963 that he was quoted as saying “they will put a man on the moon before I hit a home run.” Then, just like the script should read, on July 20th, 1969, mere minutes after Neil Armstrong took his first steps on the Rock-of-Cheese in the sky, Gaylord smacked one out of the park. Perry was always comfortable in the spotlight. His career would make a perfect movie for a hero or a villain. He was the leading man on several occasions: throwing a no-hitter in 1968; winning the Cy Young in both leagues; and was voted into the Hall of Fame in 1991. He was the arch-nemesis on occasion, as his name is often mentioned in the ageless art of doctoring a baseball to gain a competitive advantage. He claims he was once rebuffed by the makers of Vaseline when he approached them about being a spokesman for their product. In a one sentence reply, the company explained their product is used to soothe babies’ backsides, not baseballs. In 1982, the Mariners decided to bring Perry into the fold as veteran leadership to help develop some of their young pitchers. However, as a young, struggling franchise, they were also looking for someone to help fill the seats and give the audience something to cheer about. On May 16, Mariners fans witnessed history when Perry got his 300th career victory. He was the first pitcher to reach that plateau since Early Wynn in 1963. The Mariners finally became a part of baseball history even if it was in the twilight of the career of one of baseball’s most off-color stars. Perry and Rich “Goose” Gossage are currently the only two players in the Hall of Fame that played a game in a Mariners uniform. That will change in coming years with Randy Johnson, Ken Griffey Jr., and Edgar Martinez likely Hall-bound. But in 1982, Gaylord played the lead role in the blockbuster hit of the summer. Roll credits and fade to black. Next » 17. Back to the Future Left-handed starter Mark Langston was the Mariners’ first pitcher who really gained national notoriety. He recorded double-digit wins in four of his five full seasons with Seattle from 1984-1989. His best year with the Mariners was 1987 when he tallied 19 wins, then a Mariners' record. Langston was the ace of the hopeful trio of young pitchers that also included Mike Moore and Matt Young They made up a rotation that moved the Mariners out of baseball obscurity and into a relatively respectable team. In 1989, Langston made his biggest contribution to the organization by leaving. The Mariners feared losing him to free agency so they traded him to the Montreal Expos. The key piece in the 3-for-1 trade was a prospective closer named Gene Harris. The other two players included a tall, awkward, flame-throwing left-handed project named Randy Johnson and a righty named Brian Holman whom were projected as average pitchers at the major league level. Langston gave Seattle the best parting gift ever in a future Hall-of-Famer (Johnson) and a very good starting pitcher (Holman) whose career was cut short by injury. The two prospects would help create a winning attitude in the clubhouse that would propel the M’s to their first winning season (1991) and their first playoff appearance (1995). Langston became a “rental player” for Montreal. He signed with the M’s division rival Anaheim Angels in 1990 where he continued the theme of “success after Seattle” by pitching a combined no hitter with Mike Witt. It remains the last no-hitter for the Angels. Unlike Mariners before him, he actually gave something back to Seattle for the future instead of just leaving for greener pastures. Langston still holds several team records for the Mariners including career pickoffs, home runs allowed in a game (5), consecutive strikeouts (7), consecutive scoreless innings (34.1), complete games in a season (14), innings pitched in a season (272), batters faced in a season (1,152), and earned runs allowed in a season (129). Many would say that Griffey and the ’95 team saved baseball in Seattle, but true Mariner fans know that team would have never been built without the Langston trade. Next » 16. School’s Out for Summer Baseball is a game played in the hottest days of the year; the dog days of summer, played by the boys of summer. The all-star game is played in the middle of summer vacation. Whether marketing genius or just common sense, baseball became the national pastime largely because it appealed to both children and adults. It caters to the schedule of kids’ availability in the late afternoon, spring and summer breaks, and double-headers on a Saturday. The game has forever been a right of passage handed down from father to son. Often, it has taken priority over school teachings on important occasions like opening day, playoff games, or even just a Wednesday. When Mike Schooler, the Seattle Mariners’ first real dominant closer, made his entrance in the ninth inning, it was Alice Cooper’s “Schools Out” that blared over the speaker system in the Kingdome. It was symbolic for many reasons outside of the obvious association to part of the pitcher’s last name. It signified that school was out. It was literal in the sense that the teaching is done and the fun is beginning. For opposing batters, it was symbolic that their daily vacation was about to begin as the end of the game was for the most part just a formality. Unlike most major league players, Schooler was atypically average at baseball in high school, but was always determined to pitch in “The Bigs.” In the summer of 1988, he told the Los Angeles Times, “I knew there was something inside of me. I knew I wasn’t as bad as some people said I was.” He took over as the closer for the Mariners in the second half of the ’88 season, struggling very little while saving 15 games and striking out better than a batter an inning. In 1989, Schooler improved his control and really lit things up. He had 33 saves and a 2.81 ERA in 60 games. He ranked third in the American League in saves behind only Jeff Russell and Bobby Thigpen, although he pitched for a team finishing with far fewer wins. Schooler was “schooling” batters in 1990, compiling 30 saves with a minuscule ERA of 2.25 in just 49 games played when the injury came. Shortly after taking the loss in the 11th inning of Erik Hanson’s classic duel with Oakland’s Dave Stewart on Aug. 1, shoulder stiffness forced him to miss more than a month at the end of the season. He missed the first half of the ’91 season and posted seven saves in the second half despite pain and discomfort He was never the same, and after a horrible year with the Texas Rangers, he was forced to retire. Schooler’s 98 saves still rank third in Mariners’ history. His career ERA was 3.49, despite a 4.70 and 5.55 ERA in ’92 and ’93 respectively, when his arm was a noodle. No doubt he still enjoys the dog days of summer, but for Mariners fans the infamous lyrics of Alice Cooper still ring sorrowful, “School’s out, forever.” Next » 15. Haunted by the ghost of Mariner’s past Considered by many to be the third best pitcher the Mariners received in the Mark Langston deal, Brian Holman’s statistics seemed to dictate otherwise. Holman had very good stats in the minors with the Montreal Expos, and on several occasions, was named the player of the month or picked for an all-star team in double-A leagues. He was named the Southern League’s pitcher of the year. He came up through the system rather quickly and was slated as a middle-of-the-rotation type pitcher. His first win in the majors was a five-hit, complete game shutout against Tom Glavine and the Atlanta Braves. Once being traded to Seattle, he became a mainstay in the rotation and was the opening night starter in 1990, succeeding Mark Langston, the player he was traded for. He was becoming the head “Regulator” in the group of “Young Guns” Scott Bankhead, Eric Hanson, and Randy Johnson. Holman’s career was filled with potential but seemed always to end in heartache. He never had a winning record in a single season, but his career ERA was just 3.71. One game, on Apr. 20, 1990 in Oakland would serve as a microcosm of his career. No Mariners’ pitcher had ever pitched a no-hitter, not to mention a perfect game, but Holman had mowed down 26 straight batters when former Mariner Ken Phelps stepped up to the plate as a pinch-hitter. This was an easy out, right? Phelps was washed-up. He was traded from Seattle to the Yankees in 1988 for Jay Buhner. He was a bust in New York and hadn’t hit a single home run for Oakland. Moments later, the perfect game was gone. The no-hitter was gone. The shutout was gone. Kenny Phelps launched a shot over the head of outfielder Henry Cotto for a home run and Holman settled for the ninth one-hitter in Seattle history. Holman was solid for the M’s in his short tenure, but an arm injury forced him out of the game before he could fulfill his potential. He finished his career with 14 complete games, five of them shutouts in just three seasons. Next » 14. West Coast Bias: An Unbelievable Night in Oakland Erik Hanson spent the better part of four years in the Mariner’s minor league system. In 1990, he completed his first full season for Seattle going 18-9 with a 3.24 ERA, five complete games, and 236 innings pitched. That’s an all-star season right? Not when you’re hidden in the Northwest on a team that had never posted a winning record in a season. Was it a conspiracy? An East Coast bias? Or just a bunch of whining Seattleites who couldn’t seem to realize that their players simply aren’t as good as the rest of the players in the league? Let’s answer that by fast-forwarding to the future a little bit. Hanson signed as a free agent with the Red Sox in 1995. He pitched well, going 15-5 with a 4.24 ERA and a single complete game shutout in just 186 innings. In Boston, where the media could watch his filthy pitching repertoire, Hanson was an immediate pick for the all-star team and conspiracy theorists resurfaced in the streets of Seattle. Prior to the rest of the world knowing about Erik, West Coast baseball junkies were privileged to see one of the best pitching duals of the 1990’s as most of the east coast slept. Dave Stewart, Oakland’s preeminent pitcher of their heyday was on cruise control. Hanson was matching him, no out-pitching him. Carney Lansford got a single in the fourth inning and the A’s had no other hits during the first nine frames. Hanson pitched the 10th inning, giving up a hit and a wild pitch, but escaped the inning without damage. Meanwhile, Stewart was still in the game for Oakland and was holding the Mariners’ batters to just five hits in eleven innings. The M’s went to Mike Schooler in the 11th and he gave up the winning run as the A’s won 1-0. It was 21 innings of dominant pitching by the two starters and the pitcher with a no-decision gave up only two hits. Hanson would admit, “that’s as good as I can throw on any given night.” It was the second year in a row (see Brian Holman) the Mariners had received a classic pitching performance against the World Series representative for the American League, showing just how close the Mariners were to turning the corner to becoming a winning team. In 1991, the Mariners would have their first winning season, but the success would be limited by a rash of injuries to key players and free agency. Erik Hanson was one of those casualties, as the Mariners knew they could not afford to resign him and traded him to Cincinnati in 1994 along with Bret Boone for Catcher Dan Wilson reliever Bobby Ayala. At least, like Mark Langston, the Mariners got something in return for Hanson as All-Star Dan Wilson was one of the best defensive catchers in Major League history and was the man behind the plate for Randy Johnson’s 1995 Cy Young season. Next » 13. Tim Raines said what? One day in 1988, during batting practice, the Montreal Expos’ Tim Raines collided head-first with a young, 6'10'' pitcher named Randy Johnson. Raines looked up and exclaimed, “You are a big unit.” The nickname stuck and the Big Unit went on to become one of the best pitchers in the history of baseball. Coming to the Mariners in the Mark Langston trade in 1989, Randy was a work in progress. In 1990 he showed his volcanic upside pitching the first no-hitter in Mariners history against the Detroit Tigers. However, his rawness also showed as he walked six batters in the game. Later that year, he struck out 19 Chicago White Sox batters in a five-hit shutout walking just three batters. He seemed to be growing, but was still erratic in most of his starts. In ‘91 and ‘92 he led the league in walks and in ’93 and ’94 he led the league in hit batters. He also had over 200 strikeouts each of those years. The development of the Big Unit took a huge step upwards at the end of the 1992 season as he looked to Hall-of-Famer Nolan Ryan for help. Ryan noticed a flaw in his mechanics and the fix resulted in his patented slider, Mr. Snappy, becoming a lethal weapon, especially combined with his 100 mile per hour fastball. All of Randy’s accomplishments could compose a series of books, so the focus here will be on his defining moments with the Mariners. Not the no-hitter. Not the multiple one-hit masterpieces. Not the strikeouts. Not John Kruk’s infamous at-bat in the All-Star game. Randy has three specific defining moments with Seattle that ultimately affected the state of the Mariners today. In 1995, the Mariners team had the slogan “Refuse to Lose,” based on the late season heroics that saw them catch the Anaheim Angels, overcoming a 14-game divisional deficit. The Mariners and Angels tied for the best record in the American League West and were destined to play a one-game playoff to see which team would play the Yankees in the first round of the playoffs. Johnson pitched a three-hit shutout, dominating the Angels with 12 strikeouts. Defining moment number one was in the history books. The Mariners had finally won a division championship after 18 seasons and were on their way to the playoffs for the first time. Randy was unable to pitch in the five-game series against the heavily favored Yankees until Game 3 because of the one-game playoff, watching as Seattle fell behind two games to none. Seattle won game three behind the Unit’s seven-inning, 10 strikeout performance, but Game 5 is where his second defining moment came. The series was tied and game five was deadlocked at 4-4 after nine innings, when Randy was called upon in relief. His slow walk from the bullpen ignited the crowd and his teammates. He pitched the 10th, 11th, and 12th innings on short rest and allowed a run in the final frame as the Yankees looked poised to steal the series. The Mariners drew upon their refuse-to-lose attitude in the bottom of the 12th inning, winning the game on Edgar Martinez’ double that scored Ken Griffey Jr. Randy Johnson had played a pivotal part in the Mariners’ success in 1995 winning the Cy Young Award with an 18-2 record, a 2.48 ERA, and 294 punch-outs. However, Randy’s emotion and leadership was the catalyst that propelled the M’s to their most successful season to date and cemented him as a legend in Seattle. His last defining moment came in 1998. Following his fantastic 1997 season in which Johnson had a 20–4 record (the first 20-win season for a Mariner), 291 strikeouts, and a 2.28 ERA, the Mariners were distraught over their finances. Trying to figure out how to support a payroll that included big raises to many stars from the ’95 team as well as upcoming contract negotiations with Ken Griffey, Alex Rodriguez, and Randy Johnson, the Mariners chose to trade the Big Unit for a big ransom. The idea was that they might be able to resign one or maybe two of the three huge superstars and Randy was coming off back surgery in 1996. The risk out-weighed the reward and the upside of Alex Rodriguez was taking the focus of the team’s budget. Randy was sent to the Houston Astros midway through the 1998 season for pitchers John Halama, Freddy Garcia, and shortstop Carlos Guillen. Johnson was dominant the rest of his career winning four more Cy Young Awards, a World Series, and pitched a perfect game as a member of the Arizona Diamondbacks. In 1999, Griffey Jr. requested to be traded (following the death of his Orlando neighbor, golfer Payne Stewart) to be closer to his family. In 2000, Alex Rodriguez opted to sign a $250 million free-agent contract with Texas. Seattle had lost all three of their superstars. Mariners’ fans felt soulless and empty during the 2000 off-season despite the recent opening of Safeco Field that was built because of the success of the ’95 team. The players who were supposed to lead Seattle toward a dynasty were gone. The easiest one to sign may have been the Big Unit, but hindsight is 20/20, and the rest is history. Fortunately, for the Mariners, 2001 fielded a very productive team put together by free agent signings like Ichiro Suzuki and players obtained in the trades for the Big Unit and The Kid. Their success soothed the transition into the next chapter of Mariners’ history, but fans are still wondering what could have been if the Unit was a life-long Mariner. Randy won 130 games for the Mariners, more than he won with any of the other five teams he played for. He developed into a dominant force in Seattle. He owns 10 of the 15 greatest pitching efforts in Mariner history. Despite his grand success after leaving Seattle, when he goes into the Hall of Fame Mariner fans hope he is wearing a hat with a triad or a compass on it. That would be the ultimate defining moment for Seattle baseball. 12. How About an Encore? In 1993, the Mariners added a free-agent pitcher from Milwaukee named Chris Bosio. Randy Johnson threw the Mariners’ first no-hitter in 1990. Chris Bosio was no Randy Johnson, except on one night in April 1993, he may have thought he was. The game even started very “Big Unit-like” as Bosio was a little erratic and walked the first two batters he faced. Apparently, he overcame his nerves and found his control because he sat down the next 27 Boston Red Sox hitters: No hits, no walks, and no errors. A perfect game was pitched that night; it just started two batters too late. It may have been the most impressive game in Mariners history. Randy Johnson had several one-hit performances that were more impressive than his own no-hitter. Brian Holman and Eric Hanson also had magical nights, but a no-hitter is something on a higher level. No other Mariner has pitched a no-no since Bosio. He was never as good again as he was that night, retiring in 1997 after finishing three years in Seattle with a 27-31 record and a 4.43 ERA. He did return to the Mariners as a special assignment pitching coach from 2000-2002. During that time, the Mariners relied on pitching and defense in spacious Safeco Field. The M’s were coming off consecutive losing seasons, and the pitching successes that propelled the team through winning seasons in 2000-2002 (including the record 116 wins in 2001) were partly because of Bosio’s contributions. He made limited contributions as a player, but his no-hitter shows the Mariners are not just a one-trick pony when it comes to pitching. Still, he was no Randy Johnson. Next » 11. Its Kind of like Gum Stuck to Your Shoe With every step, the bottom of the shoe sticks to the surface. The cluster of goo is mostly harmless, though it could ruin the carpet or flooring and it is beyond annoying. Pick as you may, the complete residue of the sticky intruder will not fully remove itself from your sneaker. It gets stuck in the crevices of the tread and takes anchor. The shoes are placed aside as the annoyance is unbearable. Like the inevitable reoccurrence of a villain in a horror movie, the blob returns when you see the shoes while cleaning out the closet. Remembering the good times, you put them on and forget about the pestilent nature of the aforementioned partnership with Double-Bubble’s private reserve. This is how the relationship was between the Mariners and reliever Jeff Nelson. He was a little too outspoken. He was, at times, arrogant. He was sometimes just annoying. He was also very productive. Nelson played with the Mariners from 1992-1995. He was almost un-hittable as a set-up man in ’95, going 7-3 with a 2.14 ERA in 62 games. He had 96 strikeouts in 78 innings. He was paramount in holding opponents from scoring late in the game while the Mariners’ comeback kids won games in abundance in late innings. After the ’95 season he rubbed management the wrong way and they sent him to the New York Yankees before the 1996 season. He was productive in his Yankee years, but was just as abrasive. In 2000, Nelson told the New York press that Yankees manager and all-star game skipper Joe Torre would regret not naming him to the AL team at the 2000 Mid-Summer Classic. He became a free-agent after that season and the Yankees untied the laces and let loose of their tainted pair of shoes as well. Seattle signed Nelson, apparently desperate for slightly flawed, quality footwear. From 2001-2003, he formed the right side of Seattle's potent lefty/righty setup squad along with left-handed pitcher Arthur Rhodes. In 2001 he held opposing batters to a .136 batting average and a .199 slugging percentage. This time Torre bucked the trend and selected Nelson to the 2001 All-Star Game hosted in Seattle (resulting in Jamie Moyer being an all-star snub) and he was vindicated in his criticism from the previous year. The gum started to get sticky again in 2003. The Mariners were showing signs of losing their lead in the division race when Nelson blasted Seattle management as they failed to acquire an impact player at the trading deadline. Subsequently, the Mariners did make a trade, shipping their gooey shoes again to the Yankees. Once more, however, Nelson had the last laugh. He was productive in the post-season with the Yankees and the Mariners slowly lost the AL West lead and failed to make the post season by a very small margin. In 2005, those comfy shoes resurfaced again and Nelson started his third tour with the Mariners. He was mostly ineffective this time in an injury riddled season where he pitched sparingly before he was forced to retire. Jeff Nelson still holds the record for games pitched (432) and is second in career ERA (3.26) for Seattle. Nelson is second in post season games all-time behind former teammate Mariano Rivera. In his 55 playoff game appearances with Seattle and New York he held batters to a .191 average. Every time there was a magical moment in Seattle between 1995 and 2003, Jeff Nelson was a part of it. Every time there was a drop in production in that same time frame, Nelson was playing elsewhere. Maybe it wasn’t gum at all. Maybe he was the glue that held the team together. Next » 10. But I Didn’t Shoot the Deputy Mike Schooler’s arm issues left the Mariners without a real closer for the better part of the 1992 season. So, new manager Lou Piniella reached out to an old friend from his days in Cincinnati and Norm Charlton became the closer in 1993. Charlton was best known as one of the “Nasty Boys” in Cincinnati along with Rob Dibble and Randy Myers. Lou knew he could be a closer based on his 26 saves in 64 games for the Reds in 1992, but was probably surprised at how well “The Sheriff” took to the role. Norm pitched in 34 games in 1993, had 18 saves, and a 2.34 ERA before his elbow gave way and needed dreaded Tommy John surgery. The Sheriff was loved in Seattle and after a short time with the Phillies he was traded back to the M’s and was dominant again for half of the 1995 season. He appeared in 30 games and contributed 14 saves and a ridiculous 1.51 ERA in the Mariners’ run to the playoffs. He pitched for the Mariners in 1996, but his 20 saves in 70 games were not as impressive as his earlier performances and his ERA rose dramatically to 4.04. In 1997, it got even worse as his saves total dropped to just 14 in 71 games and his ERA ballooned to 7.27. There is only room for one thing in Seattle that has the numbers 727 on it and that is a commercial airplane produced by Boeing, so the "Sheriff" was asked to leave town by sunset. For some unknown reason, the Baltimore Orioles signed Norm to huge contract for the 1998 season. He was a big disappointment and was released on Jul. 28. Like Jeff Nelson, Charlton would call Seattle home a third time as a player. In 2001, he teamed up with Nelson, Kazuhiro Sasaki, and Arthur Rhodes to form one of the most successful bullpens in history. As a lefty specialist, The Sheriff was more like a deputy in the town he used to run, but his production was much better as his 44 appearances netted a respectable 3.02 ERA and he even picked up a save along the way. The 2001 team had an unprecedented regular season, never losing three games in a row all year long and with their shutdown bullpen they held opponents to 300 less runs than the Mariners’ offense scored. The Mariners led the league in most runs scored and least runs allowed. They set an American League record with 116 wins. That was the Sheriff’s last year and this time he rode off into the sunset on his terms with his head held high and M’s fans shedding tears of joy. 9. The Late (and Very Slow) Bloomer Mariners Trivia Speed Round... Question No. 1: Which Mariners’ pitcher holds the team record for career victories? Question No. 2: Which Mariners’ pitcher holds the team record for single season victories? Question No. 3: Which Mariners’ starting pitcher holds the team record for games played? Question No. 4: Which Mariners’ pitcher holds the team record for games started? Question No. 5: Which Mariners’ pitcher holds the team record for career ERA, complete games, shutouts and winning percentage? If you guessed Randy Johnson, you are correct, but only for question No. 5. The rest of the team records above all belong to the one of the most underrated pitchers in the history of baseball: Jamie Moyer. Moyer started out in the majors in 1986 as a starter with the Chicago Cubs. He spent the next 10 years with Texas, St. Louis, Baltimore, and the Red Sox as a starter and long reliever. He had limited success but was never deemed to have the tools to be a great pitcher. Then in 1996, he was traded to the Mariners after starting seven games for Boston. He was 7-1 with a 4.50 ERA for the Red Sox as a reliever and starter. He finished the season with Seattle and had a record of 6-2 as a starter. His 13-3 record led the majors in winning percentage and Moyer seemed to have found a home. Moyer would then put together a string of eight consecutive seasons with at least 13 wins. In 1997, Moyer was 17-5 with a 3.86 ERA. In 2001, he was 20-6 with a 3.43 ERA, and won an additional three games in the playoffs. He was not selected for the All-Star game as the Mariners already had Freddy Garcia, Jeff Nelson, and Kazuhiro Sasaki playing in the game. Even though his 20 wins tied Randy Johnson’s team record, he still had more to show. In 2002, he lowered his ERA to 3.32, but a lack of run support allowed him just 13 wins. In 2003, Moyer had his best year with a 21-7 record, a 3.27 ERA, and at the age of 40 he attended his first All-Star game as a player. It took him 18 years to accomplish the feat. How long has Moyer been around? He made his Major League debut with the Cubs out dueling Steve Carlton and the Phillies. He was the starting pitcher the day Greg Maddux made his debut in relief. Randy Johnson was the “young guy” when Moyer started his career in Seattle. Moyer once helped Fred Flintstone out of a big mess that even The Great Kazoo couldn’t cover up. Okay, that last one isn’t true. That is the special part about Jamie Moyer. He perseveres. He overcomes. He adapts. He helps. He never quits. Seriously, he never quits. He’s still pitching today. He will probably be the number five pitcher in the rotation for the two-time defending National League Champion Phillies in 2010, even after complications from a surgery at the end of 2009. He’ll never quit. Moyer’s changeup is legendary. Hitters know its coming. They know it's going to be cruising to the plate somewhere in the 80 mph range. They just haven’t been able to hit it consistently. Sure, Moyer isn’t going to win 20-plus games again, but he is still getting batters more than half his age out more often than they are getting hits. Moyer will be remembered by M’s fans for his levels of success, his leadership and his work ethic. He is the only Mariner to win 20 games in a season more than once. He was also a role model off the field, winning the Roberto Clemente Award, the Lou Gehrig Memorial Award, the Hutch Award, and the Branch Rickey Award. It’s a shame that mostly just Mariner fans know how great he was on the mound. By the way, the numbers to go along with the trivia questions: No. 1- Jamie Moyer, 145 (Randy Johnson had 130, Freddy Garcia had 76). No. 2- Jamie Moyer, 21. No. 3- Jamie Moyer, 324. No. 4- Jamie Moyer, 323. No. 5- Randy Johnson, 3.42, 51, 19, .900. Next » 8. The Missing Link Jamie Moyer had the best record for Seattle in 2001, but the ERA leader for the team was Venezuelan right-hander Freddy Garcia. In fact, Garcia’s 3.05 ERA actually led the American League. He also led the AL in innings pitched with 238. That was enough to earn him the first of two consecutive All Star Game appearances. Garcia was a key piece in the trade that sent Randy Johnson to Houston in 1998. Garcia, John Halama, and Carlos Guillen gave the Mariners some sort of solace for giving up possibly the greatest pitcher of the era. Garcia showed the most promise and delivered admirably during his years in Seattle. As a rookie in 1999, he pitched 33 games going 17-8 with a 4.07 ERA in 201 innings. Mariner fans were thinking that maybe losing the Big Unit wasn’t the end of the world. Garcia was an unexpected ace, Guillen was a capable starting shortstop, and Halama was serviceable as a back end of the rotation guy. The M’s filled three roster spots by letting one player go. Not a bad trade. After Garcia’s sophomore slump in 2000 where he went 9-5, he reeled off five consecutive double-digit win seasons including his standout season in 2001 and his very respectable 16-win 2002 season. He and Jamie Moyer gave the Mariners a very potent one-two punch at the top of the lineup. Not something that will rival Cliff Lee and Felix Hernandez, but they combined to win 38 games in 2001 which would rival the win totals of any two pitchers for the same team most years. Garcia would follow the trend of Mariner’s pitchers who later won a World Series with another team (see Randy Johnson, Mike Moore, Jamie Moyer, Jeff Nelson, etc.) as he was the starting pitcher for the Chicago White Sox in the clinching fourth game of the World Series in 2005. Freddy’s defining moment with the Mariners may not have anything to do with his play on the field. He should be known in Seattle baseball history as the evolutionary equivalent of the Sasquatch. He was the transitional pitcher, or the “link,” between past and present. Who knew the Northwest’s claim as the “home of Big Foot” was actually a Latin American transplant acquired in a trade with the Big Unit; the link to the past. Garcia was also the baseball hero of a well known prospect in his native Venezuela named Felix Hernandez; the link to the future. Mariner scouts had long known of Hernandez, but the unexpected success of Garcia was a big part in Hernandez deciding to sign with the Mariners. Therefore, Garcia not only took over the role of Randy Johnson, but he was also responsible, at least partially, for giving the Mariners a possible Hall of Fame starting pitcher of the future. Only time will tell the true contributions made to the Mariners by Freddy Garcia. If Hernandez fulfills his potential and stays with Seattle, the contribution would be immeasurable. Next » 7. Keeping It On the Down-Lowe The best organizations have the ability to consistently sign unknown players and develop them during their trek to the majors. Any team can make a star out of Ken Griffey Jr., Alex Rodriguez, or Alvin Davis. These are the kind of “can’t miss” prospects that you just step aside and let them do their thing. Every year there is at least one player who really steps up on a national stage that baseball experts never believed would be an impact player at the next level. Derek Lowe was one of those players… for the Boston Red Sox… twice. Once as a closer and once as a starter. Lowe was drafted in the eighth round in 1991. No big deal, right? He had some early success in Rookie and Single-A Leagues going 12-6 with a 2.41 ERA in 25 starts. He struggled a little in High A-ball in 1993, going 12-9, but his ERA exploded to 5.26 in 26 starts. In 1994-96, as he progressed through Double and Triple-A he was showing signs of being over matched with a 14-25 combined record in 52 starts with an ERA over five at three different stops. Despite Lowe’s inability to prove he should be a major leaguer, the Mariners saw the raw talent and promoted him to the big league team in 1997. In a couple appearances, he had limited success, but was soon traded to Boston with promising catcher Jason Varitek for aging closer Heathcliff Slocumb. Mike Schooler and Norm Charlton had proven to the Mariners just how important the role of the closer is in baseball. After Charlton struggled in 1996 and started off 1997 on a down note, the M’s decided they desperately needed a reliable arm at the end of the game. Slocumb seemed like a great choice. Heathcliff had 32 saves with the Phillies in 1995 and 31 with Boston in 1996 and his ERA was 2.89 and 3.02 respectively those years. However, in ’97 he began the year with 17 saves in Bean Town, but he was 0-5 with a 5.79 ERA in 49 games. The writing was on the wall, but the Mariners thought they could turn him around. Heathcliff was an utter failure in Seattle during his tenure from 1997-1998, finishing with a total of 13 saves, an ERA close to five, and a 2-9 record. The trade ended up being one of the most lopsided in recent MLB history. Lowe became a very effective closer for Boston, leading the league with 42 saves in 2000. He then went back to being a starter in 2002 finishing 21-8 with a 2.58 ERA. Along the way he pitched a no-hitter, the first in Fenway Park since 1965, and finished third in the Cy Young voting. Jason Varitek was a breakout catcher for the Red Sox: He became their Captain and the catalyst for their offense. Both players made big contributions in building the squad that won the 2004 World Series. The Mariners trading prowess they displayed with the Langston and Johnson trades took a big hit on this one and Derek Lowe will long be remembered for defining the lack of success for the Mariner teams of 1998-1999. They struggled with starting pitchers and relievers and had their only two losing seasons between 1995 and 2000. 6. Words Will Never Hurt Me Ever played that game, “Six degrees of separation to Kevin Bacon?" Omar Vizquel came up in the Mariners’ organization before being traded to the Cleveland Indians. Cleveland had fantastic, talented teams that made it to the World Series twice in three years, but lost both times. Jose Mesa was Omar’s teammate in Cleveland. Mesa failed to close out game seven of the 1997 post season classic and the Florida Marlins ended up winning the series. Mesa was out of Cleveland after 44 appearances in 1998 being sent to San Francisco. He joined the Mariners from 1999-2000. Mesa continued the string of closers who didn’t work out for the Mariners. His ERA was over five in his two years in Seattle and he was supplanted as the closer in 2000 after the M’s turned to Kazuhiro Sasaki. Arthur Rhodes and Jose Mesa played together in Seattle in 2000. Rhodes was not great that year with a 4.28 ERA in 72 games. Maybe Mesa was to blame because as soon as he left Seattle, Rhodes became almost unhittable. In 2001, Rhodes was 8-0 with a teeny 1.71 ERA. In 2002, he was 10-4 with a still remarkable 2.33 ERA. What was the secret to Rhodes’ success? Not steroids, PED’s, or HGH. Not wearing the same socks every night for six months straight. Not sacrificing a live chicken or installing religious alters at his locker. Maybe Rhodes’ secret weapon was his jewelry? In 2001, he was donning some huge, diamond earrings. Rumor has it they were so big the space shuttle crew once had to scrub a re-entry to the home planet as they could not see their instruments because of the glare emanating into space from Safeco Field. On Sept. 1, Omar Vizquel brought Rhodes’ jeweled secret to the national forefront. Rhodes was in as relief and was about to mow down the Indian’s lineup when Omar called time-out. He told the umpire that he could not focus because of the, oooh-shiny, distraction of the rocks attached to the pitcher’s earlobes. Arthur was told he needed to remove his earrings and he erupted in anger, no doubt fearing how he may pitch without his solar powered generators instilling his super powers. He was screaming at Omar. Omar was shouting back at him. Rhodes pointed at Omar’s head, either threatening to throw at him or insulting his fashion sense sans any glittery accessories. The argument got heated, benches cleared, and a brawl was imminent as Rhodes was ejected from the game. However, both teams finally realized there is no way they can hold their heads up if they got injured in a fight over jewelry. For the love of God, this is a sport and there is no room for sissy-fights over man-sparkles. The game went on, the season went on, and the Mariners ended up on a tear as they broke the single season win record for the American League. Thanks for the incentive, Omar. The next year a new rule was implemented prohibiting overly excessive or distracting jewelry on the field. Apparently, Omar liked the attention as he released his book, “Omar! My Life On and Off the Field,” in 2002. In the book he took a shot at ex-teammate Jose Mesa as being “completely empty” prior to allowing the Marlins to win the 1997 World Series. That started a long feud between Mesa and Vizquel, including threats of physical harm. Mesa said his family was upset. "Even my little boy told me to get him. If I face him 10 more times, I'll hit him 10 times. I want to kill him." Although it is very much like a metaphor for baseball: sticks (bats) and stones (baseballs) may break my bones, but… Jewelry? A book? Listen up, girls, there’s no crying in baseball. Next » 5. Baseball, Hot Dogs, Apple Pie and Japanese Baseball Players? The Mariners, as those in the Northwest know, are owned by the Japanese founded corporation, Nintendo of America. The company name itself lends insight into recent activity in regard to the diversity of players on the team, especially Asian based talent. Seattle and Nintendo have a strong desire to show that combining cultures can make for a productive and profitable venture be it in baseball or video games. Shortly after the video game giant purchased the Mariners, they started tapping the Japanese baseball market for new big league talent. The first Japanese player in an M’s uniform was Mac Suzuki. He was a relief pitcher who had a short career and limited contributions to the team from 1995-1998. Suzuki was the first Japanese born player to play in the American Majors without playing a game in Japan’s professional circuit. He was also the first Japanese player to pitch in the American League. From that point on, the stage was set for the M’s to continue with the Japanese player movement. The next candidate to audition for spot on the roster was a relief pitcher that was a dominant force in the Japanese major leagues named Kazuhiro Sasaki. He was selected to eight all-star teams in Japan. “Kaz” performed his new role to a tee, taking over as the Mariners’ closer and setting new standards in Seattle and Major League history. In addition to his Rookie of the Year Award in 2000, Sasaki also set several Major League Baseball records for Japanese-born players including most saves (45) and save opportunities (46) in a season, and was twice selected to play in the All-Star game. Sasaki's 37 saves in his initial season with the Seattle remains a MLB record for saves by a rookie of any nationality. Sasaki's out pitch, a devastating split-fingered fastball that drops when arriving at home plate, was nicknamed "The Thang". He complemented it with a four-seam fastball that could reach the low-90s. Sasaki maintained a rigorous throwing program that involved throwing up to 100 pitches following games in which he did not appear, mostly to the chagrin of Mariner management. Sasaki decided to leave the Mariners before the last year of his contract in 2004, giving up $8.5 million, citing his desire to be with his family in Japan. According to the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, however, Sasaki's real reason for returning to Japan was pressure from ownership, due to his "indiscreet philandering". There is no doubt he was a philanderer, but it was anything but discreet. Seattle fans loved Kaz, and Kaz loved them back. It was a global love affair that gave birth to the Mariner signings of Asian baseball players including Ichiro Suzuki, Shigetoshi Hasegawa, Sin-Shoo Choo, Cha Seung Baek, Kenji Johjima, and Masao Kida. It also opened the door to the hiring of the first Asian-American Manager in Don Wakamatsu (born in Oregon). After the abundant successes of Ichiro, Johjima, Sasaki, Hasegawa (Seattle’s single season ERA king), and Wakamatsu, Mariner fans and ownership alike are saying “domo arigato” (Japanese for “thank you very much”), Mr. Sasaki. Next » 4. Five. Five-Million-Dollar. Five-Million-Dollar Foot-Longs? From 2000-2003 the Seattle Mariners won at least 91 games each season. They had a strong fan base and were considered one of the most stable franchises in the league with a very promising farm system. In 2004, everything went haywire as the M’s tumbled to a 99-loss season. What happened at that point was a combination of offensive ineptitude from an aging roster and the complete collapse of their entire pitching staff due to youth, injuries, and poor run support. The Mariners’ veterans were now on the downhill side of their baseball prime. Their opening day starters included aging veterans Ichiro, Edgar Martinez, Bret Boone, John Olerud, Rich Aurilia, Randy Winn, Raul Ibanez, and Jamie Moyer. Only Ichiro and Moyer would remain with the Mariners after their very depressing 2005, 93-loss season. The M’s tried to offset some of the deficiencies in their offense by opening up the purse strings in 2005, signing Richie Sexson and Adrian Beltre to man the corners of the infield. The M’s offense didn’t really improve and in 2006 they weren’t going to spend any more money on batters after getting burned. The Mariners were trying to rebuild the pitching staff and the process could take a while. Felix Hernandez was a couple years away from consistency and the kids in the system just weren’t ready yet. Seattle was left with options of rushing guys to the majors, making trades, or signing a free agent. Free agency was the path they chose and Jarrod Washburn was their man, signing a four year, $37 million contract to compliment a rotation that included an aging Jamie Moyer, and inconsistent talents like Felix Hernandez, Gil Meche, and Joel Pineiro. From 2000-2002 with the Angels, Washburn looked like he could be a great pitcher as he went 36-18 with an ERA under four. His ERA and winning percentage worsened the next two years before rebounding in his “contract year.” Washburn was coming off a season where he was just 8-8, but had a very respectable 3.20 ERA before signing with the Mariners. Again, free agent signings were not kind as Seattle got Wash-“burned” over the next three seasons, with their new acquisition going 23-43 with an ERA over 4.50. While “Jared” of TV commercial fame was losing weight on a steady diet of Subway sandwiches, Jarrod was losing credibility as a starting pitcher with a steady diet of losses. He was the victim of seven blown saves in 2008, but he was 5-14 with a 4.69 ERA. Who’s the victim here? Not Washburn. His paychecks kept showing up in his bank account regardless of his performance. Just when the money looked like it would come to an end after 2009, Washburn turned it on in a “contract year” once again. He jumped out to a career best 2.64 ERA in 20 starts and an 8-6 record, including a masterful one-hitter on July 6th. It is the only one-hitter in Safeco Field since opening in 1999. Washburn finally had some value to the Mariners as a mid-season trade option and the Detroit Tigers gave up two, low level pitching prospects in Luke French and Maurice Robles to acquire the re-born pitcher. Washburn would have the last laugh again, struggling with an injury and finishing the season 1-3 with a 7.33 ERA. He was not signed by Detroit and is still a free agent. Apparently, no other teams are going to bite on the Jarrod who doesn’t work for Subway. Seattle has shown some limited interest in resigning him for 2010 to fill out the back end of the rotation. He would have to take a big discount in salary for Seattle to bring him back and then he could start repaying all the money he didn’t earn in his previous contract. Maybe they could have a Subway night at Safeco Field where fans get a free sandwich if this Jarrod “loses weight” on his ERA? 3. “Putz-up” or Shut-up! The word “putz” is defined as a person who is a fool or a jerk. No wonder former Mariners’ closer J.J. Putz insists his name is pronounced differently: claiming it sounds like “puts” instead. As in, the Mariner manager puts his closer in at the end of the game to nail down a victory. In Seattle, that is exactly what Putz did between 2006 and 2008. He took over for an aging “Every day” Eddie Guardado a few weeks into the ’06 season and never looked back on his way to a sensational first year as a closer. Putz converted 36 of 43 save opportunities while posting a 2.30 ERA and struck out 104 batters in just 78 innings. Putz was at it again in 2007 after signing a three year, $13.1 million deal with the Mariners. He improved on his previous year stats with 40 saves in 42 chances, a 1.38 ERA and 82 K’s in 72 innings. Putz was the “Delivery Man of the Month” winner in June, made the All-Star team, and became the only Seattle Mariner to win the Rolaids Relief Man of the Year award. He also broke Guardado’s team record of 27 consecutive games saved which ended at 30. In just two years, Putz ranked second in career and single season saves totals in Mariner team history behind only Kazuhiro Sasaki. In 2008, when his value was at its apex, Putz was part of a three-team, twelve-player blockbuster trade involving the New York Mets and the Cleveland Indians. Along with J.J., The Mets also got outfielder Jeremy Reed, and reliever Sean Green. The plan was to solidify their bullpen a day after signing free agent closer Francisco Rodriguez. The Cleveland Indians got a second base prospect named Luis Valbuena from the Mariners and relief pitcher Joe Smith from the Mets and sent promising outfielder Franklin Gutierrez to Seattle. The Mariners ended up getting a stockpile of players from the Mets in the deal including reliever/starter Aaron Heilman, outfielder Endy Chavez, and three prospects (first baseman Mike Carp, reliever Maikel Cleto, and outfielder Ezequil Carrera). There are three huge aspects of this trade for Seattle fans: First, as an all world defender with huge offensive upside, Franklin Gutierrez was the prize of the trade for the M's; Second, getting Aaron Heilman allowed Seattle to make two other trades (with Chicago Cubs and Pittsburgh Pirates) that eventually netted the Mariners starting pitcher Ian Snell and short stop Jack Wilson; Third, this trade signified the start of many important moves by new GM Jack Zduriencik, who in a very short amount of time has helped turn the Mariners around and is being raved about in baseball circles as a genius hire by Seattle. Although, Heilman and Chavez had limited success as Mariners neither are part of the Mariner team of 2010. Chavez had season ending surgery and signed a free agent minor league contract with the Texas Rangers. Heilman was traded to the Chicago Cubs in January, 2009 for Ronny Cedeño and Garrett Olson. Cedeno was later traded to the Pittsburgh Pirates along with the M's top rated prospect, catcher Jeff Clement and three Single-A level pitching prospects. The Mariners got starter Ian Snell and defensive short stop Jack Wilson from Pittsburgh. The trades go down as a huge success for the Mariners as Gutierrez has been good offensively and covers center field like a blanket. Wilson gives Seattle a huge upgrade defensively at short stop. Mike Carp looks like he'll eventually be a major leaguer with some pop in his bat. Ultimately, Putz gave Seattle his best years to date, as he was a colossal disappointment with the Mets and they declined to pick up his 2010 team option. He signed with the Chicago White Sox in the offseason. Although Mets fans probably pronounce his name incorrectly, Putz was dynamite for Seattle. The Mariners will miss Jeff Clement, especially given the uncertain status of their current catching candidates. Cedeno, Heilman, Clement and the other prospects could end up having some great value for Pittsburgh/Mets/Cleveland down the line, but right now it appears Seattle got a great return based on what they gave up. The Mariners are on the right track to winning with Jack Zduriencik calling the shots. Trading J.J. Putz was the start of a string of decisions that have put the Mariners back into a position to contend for the division in 2010. Putz' defining moments on the field were solid, but the chain reactions set forth by letting him go and how all the players end up performing for their respective teams will utlimately determine his overall contributions to the Mariners. Right now, Seattle is a better team (especially after discovering closer David Aardsma last season) than they were prior to the trades. Next » 2. Did You Get the License Number of that Truck? Mariner history is riddled with trades. Some were great, like Ken Phelps for Jay Buhner. Some were awful, like Jason Varitek and Derek Lowe for Heathcliff Slocumb. Some were a “wash," like Randy Johnson for Freddy Garcia, John Halama, and Carlos Guillen. On February 8, 2008, the Mariners may have completed possibly the worst trade in Major League history. The Baltimore Oriole’s pitching ace, Erik Bedard, was on the market for the right price and Seattle decided they would pay above and beyond the fair market value. The Mariners sent five players, including soon-to-be all stars Adam Jones and George Sherrill, as well as starting pitcher Chris Tillman, and prospects Kameron Mickolio and Tony Butler to the O’s. The Mariners got an above average pitcher with upside who had a limited resume of success. Bedard (pronounced “bay-dar” from his Canadian origins) got off to a horrible start for Seattle during spring training in 2008, leading the exhibition season in home runs allowed with nine. By July, he was on the disabled list ending all hope of making an impact in his first season with Seattle. Erik finished with a 6-4 record and a respectable 3.67 ERA, but pitched in only 15 games totaling 81 innings. That was not exactly what the M’s expected from him based on the talent they parted with. Seattle hoped for 15-20 wins and 200 innings. Even with those levels of success, the deal may have been more one-sided for Baltimore. More injuries crept up in 2009 as Bedard finished a twin-like season in Seattle with just 15 more games, a 5-3 record and a very good 2.82 ERA in just 83 innings. In two years, the Mariners got 11 wins out of the trade and fans were thinking that Tillman, once the most treasured arm in the farm system, could have accomplished that much by himself. The bottom line is that the Mariners gave up five quality players and a good portion of the gold bullion in Fort Knox for just 30 games as Bedard became a free agent after season-ending surgery in 2009. Ouch. When he was healthy, he was the pitcher the M’s wanted, so they decided to sign him to an incentive laden, $1.5 million contract for 2010 with an option for 2011. If he comes back from his surgery and pitches like he was able to in 2007 when healthy, he’ll be a steal at that price. He is not due to pitch until at least May or June, but he can contribute more than half a season with Felix Hernandez and Cliff Lee toward a pennant race and the playoffs and could be the decisive factor on how far the Mariners can go in 2010. For now, Mariner fans feel like they’ve been run over by a bus and the best case scenario with Bedard still wouldn’t make the tread marks disappear. Next » 1. Talking ‘Bout My Generation King Felix reigns in Seattle. Felix Hernandez is the future for the Mariners and they committed to signing him to a five-year contract extension in the off-season. Mariner fans hope Felix is the one true Hall of Fame player to start and end his career in the Northwest, and not contribute anything to other organizations in between except an abundance of losses. That would make the King of diamonds the King of hearts in Seattle. Ultimately, Hernandez could define the Mariners’ greatest triumphs, surpassing even the Big Unit and the Old Man. He is coming off a runner-up finish for the coveted Cy Young award. He will turn 24 years old on Apr. 8 and already has 58 wins in his short career. If he averages 15 wins per year, he could reach 300 wins at the age of 40 and join the Big Unit and Gaylord Perry as the only 300 games winners to wear a Mariner uniform. He is one of only a few youngsters in the Majors with a legitimate shot at reaching the lofty plateau. Of course, that is a generation away and there is no counting chickens before they hatch. The focus should be short term and what he can help the Mariners accomplish this year. Like souls in Hell searching for a mythical glass of ice-water, Seattle is yearning for their first World Series appearance. The Mariners, Texas Rangers, and Montreal Expos/Washington Nationals are the only teams never to make it to the fall classic. Hernandez and Cliff Lee will don Mariner Blue and Teal this year in hopes of creating their own defining moments in Seattle. If they have a great season and seem to gel as teammates, could Felix help convince Lee to accept a contract extension with Seattle? That would be a defining moment. Felix is younger than Lee and Seattle needs to focus on keeping him in the starting rotation for a decade following his current contract, so the financial aspects of signing Lee seem a bit unlikely. Mariner fans have endured over 30 years of disappointment and regardless of individual shining stars, they want just one thing for their current group of players. Jewelry worth fighting for: A World Series Ring.

Randy Johnson

44 years ago today, nerds everywhere found a new calling in life when what TV series debuted with the episode named “”The Man Trap””?

20 Pitchers That Define the Seattle Mariners | Bleacher Report 20 Pitchers That Define the Seattle Mariners Use your ← → (arrow) keys to browse the slideshow 8.0K 9 Comments Pitchers and catchers have reported to Spring Training and opening day is just around the corner. In Arizona, Felix Hernandez and Cliff Lee have the baseball world abuzz with anticipation of the impact they can make on the landscape of Seattle baseball. Will they answer the call to arms with a team monopoly in the pursuit of the American League Cy Young Award? Will they struggle or suffer injuries and fail to achieve the lofty predictions of their fans? Regardless of the overall accomplishments of the two-headed beast atop the Mariner’s pitching rotation, 2010 will be a year that leaves a lasting impression on the history of Seattle baseball, for better or for worse. Be it good, bad, or ugly, many pitchers have left their mark on the maturation of the Seattle Mariners during their 33-year lifespan (34 including the one year existence of the Seattle Pilots). Some pitchers were unbelievably successful and helped launch the organization to new heights. Randy Johnson and Jamie Moyer exemplify the quirkiness and individuality the northwest part of the country is renowned for. They also set new standards for all future M’s pitchers to aspire to. Others have been so abysmal that fans dare not speak their names or repeat their feats of agony. Steve Trout, Heathcliff Slocomb, Bobby Ayala, Matt Young, and Mike Morgan surely made some positive contributions, but their defining moments with the Mariners are not something they would voluntarily share with their grandchildren at the dinner table. Some pitchers had little to contribute directly to the team, but indirectly added colorful chapters to the ever-growing book of history that defines the depths of Mariner’s pith and pity over the years. Gaylord Perry and Diego Segui have their places reserved in the Mariners Hall of Fame, but not because of substantial career achievements in Seattle. In this chronological tale, share the joy, the tears, the laughter, and the absurdity of the 20 pitchers who helped make the Mariners who they are today and will forever live in the memories of Mariners' fans. Next » 20. It’s like Déjà Vu all over again, and again Right-handed pitcher Diego Segui broke into the majors with the Kansas City Athletics in 1962. After limited success with Kansas City/Oakland, Segui sported a 42-59 overall record when joining the expansion Seattle Pilots in 1969. He pitched in relief in the inaugural game for the Pilots, earning a hold during the first win of Seattle’s MLB history. At the end of the season, the Pilots were purchased by Bud Selig and relocated to Milwaukee, leading to a lawsuit against MLB. Seattle's Kingdome was built in anticipation of acquiring both MLB and NFL franchises, and the Seattle Mariners were born (again?) in 1977. The starting pitcher for the Mariner’s inaugural game was a familiar link to the past. Diego Segui took the mound and lost 7-0 to the California Angels. Both the ’69 Pilots and ’77 Mariners finished with the same 64-98 record. Segui had his best career year statistically with the Pilots, going 12-6 with a 3.35 ERA. He had his worst career year statistically with the Mariners going 0-7 in 40 games (just 8 starts). Diego Segui’s only season with the Mariners was his final season in the Majors as he ended his career with a sub-par 92-111 overall record. However, Segui again played a part in Seattle franchise history as his son David played for the Mariners, continuing the father/son history Ken Griffey Sr. and Jr. created in the early 90’s. Unlike its predecessors, history was unkind to the Segui family in regards to Mariner team success. Sandwiched between the “Refuse to Lose” team of 1995 and the 2000 team that barely made the playoffs, the M’s had two losing seasons, while David played for Seattle from 1998-1999. He did his part in 1998, with arguably his best overall year: 19 home runs, 84 RBI, and a .305 batting average. David Segui later tested positive for a banned substance, casting doubt on his two best years of 1997 in Montreal and 1998 with Seattle. Diego Segui will hold a special place in the hearts of Seattle fans for his unique status as probably the only person that will ever have played in two inaugural games for two different franchises. However, from start to finish, the Segui name is way too much of a connection to the struggles of beginning a new franchise (twice) and how the continued success is difficult to sustain. Next » 19. Sometimes Moore is Less Seattle had the first overall pick in the 1981 MLB Draft and chose a promising young right-hander named Mike Moore. The franchise was just five seasons old when Moore made it to the big leagues in 1982. Big Mike did not make an immediate impact, as he finished the year 7-14 with a 5.36 ERA in 144 innings. In fact, Moore was hardly ever an impact player with the Mariners, as he started a disturbing trend of Seattle pitchers who struggled in the Emerald City only to find success with other franchises. Matt Young was Moore’s teammate with the Mariners between 1983 and 1988, and they both share the Seattle-franchise record of 19 losses in one season. Young also lost 18 games in 1990. In 1992, the Red Sox and Indians played a doubleheader. Young, now playing for Boston, got the start in the first game. He placed his name in the annals of MLB history with an “unrecognized” no-hitter because he only pitched eight innings. Young took the loss as Cleveland scored two runs on seven walks and a Red Sox error. Roger Clemens pitched the second game and got a win with a two-hitter. The doubleheader is still a Major League record for the least number of total hits by an opponent in a two game set. Mike Moore is more relevant in his successes after life in Seattle. A workhorse pitcher, he had moments of brilliance. His best year with Seattle was 1985, as he went 17-11 with a 3.46 ERA, pitching 14 complete games and 247 innings. Overall, he never really turned the corner, as he had double-digit losses in all six of the full seasons he played with the Mariners. On Sept. 17, 1988, Moore pitched one of the classic games in Mariners’ history, firing a two-hitter and walking none while striking out eight. Both hits were erased by double plays and it remains the only game in Seattle history in which a pitcher faced the minimum 27 batters. Mike Moore is the Yen and Yang of Mariners history: the good and the bad, the hope and the sorrow. He ranks fifth all-time in wins for the Mariners, but ranks first in losses. He ranks first in complete games, third in innings pitched and fourth in strikeouts. He also ranks 26th in ERA and last in hits allowed and losses in a single season. Moore left the Mariners after the 1988 season with a 66-96 record and a 4.38 ERA. In 1989, he joined the Oakland Athletics and promptly showed his true potential with an all-star season that saw him go 19-11 with a 2.61 ERA. He picked up two victories in the A’s World Series win over the San Francisco Giants in the “Earthquake Series.” Moore also pitched for the A’s in their 1990 World Series loss to Lou Piniella’s Cincinnati Reds. Piniella and Reds’ reliever Norm Charlton would later join the Mariners. Maybe that was the Karma the M’s needed to reverse the curse of the Mike Moore era in Seattle: Adding members of the team that knocked him back down to earth to start their own tradition of winning. Apparently, it worked as the Mariners’ first taste of winning occurred in the ‘90s. Moore is still considered a huge reason why the Mariners improved in the 80s, sometimes even flirting with a .500 record. But he is a sore subject with Mariners' fans who saw him flourish with their division rivals. Next » 18. Meet the Fockers Only in the Movies can the name Gaylord be more popular than baseball legend and Hall-of-Famer, Gaylord Perry. In the movie “Meet the Parents” we were introduced to Gaylord Focker, played by Ben Stiller, who is a bumbling mess of nerves around his fiancé’s Ex-CIA father. Gaylord Perry had his own movie plots at times. It was rumored in 1963 that he was quoted as saying “they will put a man on the moon before I hit a home run.” Then, just like the script should read, on July 20th, 1969, mere minutes after Neil Armstrong took his first steps on the Rock-of-Cheese in the sky, Gaylord smacked one out of the park. Perry was always comfortable in the spotlight. His career would make a perfect movie for a hero or a villain. He was the leading man on several occasions: throwing a no-hitter in 1968; winning the Cy Young in both leagues; and was voted into the Hall of Fame in 1991. He was the arch-nemesis on occasion, as his name is often mentioned in the ageless art of doctoring a baseball to gain a competitive advantage. He claims he was once rebuffed by the makers of Vaseline when he approached them about being a spokesman for their product. In a one sentence reply, the company explained their product is used to soothe babies’ backsides, not baseballs. In 1982, the Mariners decided to bring Perry into the fold as veteran leadership to help develop some of their young pitchers. However, as a young, struggling franchise, they were also looking for someone to help fill the seats and give the audience something to cheer about. On May 16, Mariners fans witnessed history when Perry got his 300th career victory. He was the first pitcher to reach that plateau since Early Wynn in 1963. The Mariners finally became a part of baseball history even if it was in the twilight of the career of one of baseball’s most off-color stars. Perry and Rich “Goose” Gossage are currently the only two players in the Hall of Fame that played a game in a Mariners uniform. That will change in coming years with Randy Johnson, Ken Griffey Jr., and Edgar Martinez likely Hall-bound. But in 1982, Gaylord played the lead role in the blockbuster hit of the summer. Roll credits and fade to black. Next » 17. Back to the Future Left-handed starter Mark Langston was the Mariners’ first pitcher who really gained national notoriety. He recorded double-digit wins in four of his five full seasons with Seattle from 1984-1989. His best year with the Mariners was 1987 when he tallied 19 wins, then a Mariners' record. Langston was the ace of the hopeful trio of young pitchers that also included Mike Moore and Matt Young They made up a rotation that moved the Mariners out of baseball obscurity and into a relatively respectable team. In 1989, Langston made his biggest contribution to the organization by leaving. The Mariners feared losing him to free agency so they traded him to the Montreal Expos. The key piece in the 3-for-1 trade was a prospective closer named Gene Harris. The other two players included a tall, awkward, flame-throwing left-handed project named Randy Johnson and a righty named Brian Holman whom were projected as average pitchers at the major league level. Langston gave Seattle the best parting gift ever in a future Hall-of-Famer (Johnson) and a very good starting pitcher (Holman) whose career was cut short by injury. The two prospects would help create a winning attitude in the clubhouse that would propel the M’s to their first winning season (1991) and their first playoff appearance (1995). Langston became a “rental player” for Montreal. He signed with the M’s division rival Anaheim Angels in 1990 where he continued the theme of “success after Seattle” by pitching a combined no hitter with Mike Witt. It remains the last no-hitter for the Angels. Unlike Mariners before him, he actually gave something back to Seattle for the future instead of just leaving for greener pastures. Langston still holds several team records for the Mariners including career pickoffs, home runs allowed in a game (5), consecutive strikeouts (7), consecutive scoreless innings (34.1), complete games in a season (14), innings pitched in a season (272), batters faced in a season (1,152), and earned runs allowed in a season (129). Many would say that Griffey and the ’95 team saved baseball in Seattle, but true Mariner fans know that team would have never been built without the Langston trade. Next » 16. School’s Out for Summer Baseball is a game played in the hottest days of the year; the dog days of summer, played by the boys of summer. The all-star game is played in the middle of summer vacation. Whether marketing genius or just common sense, baseball became the national pastime largely because it appealed to both children and adults. It caters to the schedule of kids’ availability in the late afternoon, spring and summer breaks, and double-headers on a Saturday. The game has forever been a right of passage handed down from father to son. Often, it has taken priority over school teachings on important occasions like opening day, playoff games, or even just a Wednesday. When Mike Schooler, the Seattle Mariners’ first real dominant closer, made his entrance in the ninth inning, it was Alice Cooper’s “Schools Out” that blared over the speaker system in the Kingdome. It was symbolic for many reasons outside of the obvious association to part of the pitcher’s last name. It signified that school was out. It was literal in the sense that the teaching is done and the fun is beginning. For opposing batters, it was symbolic that their daily vacation was about to begin as the end of the game was for the most part just a formality. Unlike most major league players, Schooler was atypically average at baseball in high school, but was always determined to pitch in “The Bigs.” In the summer of 1988, he told the Los Angeles Times, “I knew there was something inside of me. I knew I wasn’t as bad as some people said I was.” He took over as the closer for the Mariners in the second half of the ’88 season, struggling very little while saving 15 games and striking out better than a batter an inning. In 1989, Schooler improved his control and really lit things up. He had 33 saves and a 2.81 ERA in 60 games. He ranked third in the American League in saves behind only Jeff Russell and Bobby Thigpen, although he pitched for a team finishing with far fewer wins. Schooler was “schooling” batters in 1990, compiling 30 saves with a minuscule ERA of 2.25 in just 49 games played when the injury came. Shortly after taking the loss in the 11th inning of Erik Hanson’s classic duel with Oakland’s Dave Stewart on Aug. 1, shoulder stiffness forced him to miss more than a month at the end of the season. He missed the first half of the ’91 season and posted seven saves in the second half despite pain and discomfort He was never the same, and after a horrible year with the Texas Rangers, he was forced to retire. Schooler’s 98 saves still rank third in Mariners’ history. His career ERA was 3.49, despite a 4.70 and 5.55 ERA in ’92 and ’93 respectively, when his arm was a noodle. No doubt he still enjoys the dog days of summer, but for Mariners fans the infamous lyrics of Alice Cooper still ring sorrowful, “School’s out, forever.” Next » 15. Haunted by the ghost of Mariner’s past Considered by many to be the third best pitcher the Mariners received in the Mark Langston deal, Brian Holman’s statistics seemed to dictate otherwise. Holman had very good stats in the minors with the Montreal Expos, and on several occasions, was named the player of the month or picked for an all-star team in double-A leagues. He was named the Southern League’s pitcher of the year. He came up through the system rather quickly and was slated as a middle-of-the-rotation type pitcher. His first win in the majors was a five-hit, complete game shutout against Tom Glavine and the Atlanta Braves. Once being traded to Seattle, he became a mainstay in the rotation and was the opening night starter in 1990, succeeding Mark Langston, the player he was traded for. He was becoming the head “Regulator” in the group of “Young Guns” Scott Bankhead, Eric Hanson, and Randy Johnson. Holman’s career was filled with potential but seemed always to end in heartache. He never had a winning record in a single season, but his career ERA was just 3.71. One game, on Apr. 20, 1990 in Oakland would serve as a microcosm of his career. No Mariners’ pitcher had ever pitched a no-hitter, not to mention a perfect game, but Holman had mowed down 26 straight batters when former Mariner Ken Phelps stepped up to the plate as a pinch-hitter. This was an easy out, right? Phelps was washed-up. He was traded from Seattle to the Yankees in 1988 for Jay Buhner. He was a bust in New York and hadn’t hit a single home run for Oakland. Moments later, the perfect game was gone. The no-hitter was gone. The shutout was gone. Kenny Phelps launched a shot over the head of outfielder Henry Cotto for a home run and Holman settled for the ninth one-hitter in Seattle history. Holman was solid for the M’s in his short tenure, but an arm injury forced him out of the game before he could fulfill his potential. He finished his career with 14 complete games, five of them shutouts in just three seasons. Next » 14. West Coast Bias: An Unbelievable Night in Oakland Erik Hanson spent the better part of four years in the Mariner’s minor league system. In 1990, he completed his first full season for Seattle going 18-9 with a 3.24 ERA, five complete games, and 236 innings pitched. That’s an all-star season right? Not when you’re hidden in the Northwest on a team that had never posted a winning record in a season. Was it a conspiracy? An East Coast bias? Or just a bunch of whining Seattleites who couldn’t seem to realize that their players simply aren’t as good as the rest of the players in the league? Let’s answer that by fast-forwarding to the future a little bit. Hanson signed as a free agent with the Red Sox in 1995. He pitched well, going 15-5 with a 4.24 ERA and a single complete game shutout in just 186 innings. In Boston, where the media could watch his filthy pitching repertoire, Hanson was an immediate pick for the all-star team and conspiracy theorists resurfaced in the streets of Seattle. Prior to the rest of the world knowing about Erik, West Coast baseball junkies were privileged to see one of the best pitching duals of the 1990’s as most of the east coast slept. Dave Stewart, Oakland’s preeminent pitcher of their heyday was on cruise control. Hanson was matching him, no out-pitching him. Carney Lansford got a single in the fourth inning and the A’s had no other hits during the first nine frames. Hanson pitched the 10th inning, giving up a hit and a wild pitch, but escaped the inning without damage. Meanwhile, Stewart was still in the game for Oakland and was holding the Mariners’ batters to just five hits in eleven innings. The M’s went to Mike Schooler in the 11th and he gave up the winning run as the A’s won 1-0. It was 21 innings of dominant pitching by the two starters and the pitcher with a no-decision gave up only two hits. Hanson would admit, “that’s as good as I can throw on any given night.” It was the second year in a row (see Brian Holman) the Mariners had received a classic pitching performance against the World Series representative for the American League, showing just how close the Mariners were to turning the corner to becoming a winning team. In 1991, the Mariners would have their first winning season, but the success would be limited by a rash of injuries to key players and free agency. Erik Hanson was one of those casualties, as the Mariners knew they could not afford to resign him and traded him to Cincinnati in 1994 along with Bret Boone for Catcher Dan Wilson reliever Bobby Ayala. At least, like Mark Langston, the Mariners got something in return for Hanson as All-Star Dan Wilson was one of the best defensive catchers in Major League history and was the man behind the plate for Randy Johnson’s 1995 Cy Young season. Next » 13. Tim Raines said what? One day in 1988, during batting practice, the Montreal Expos’ Tim Raines collided head-first with a young, 6'10'' pitcher named Randy Johnson. Raines looked up and exclaimed, “You are a big unit.” The nickname stuck and the Big Unit went on to become one of the best pitchers in the history of baseball. Coming to the Mariners in the Mark Langston trade in 1989, Randy was a work in progress. In 1990 he showed his volcanic upside pitching the first no-hitter in Mariners history against the Detroit Tigers. However, his rawness also showed as he walked six batters in the game. Later that year, he struck out 19 Chicago White Sox batters in a five-hit shutout walking just three batters. He seemed to be growing, but was still erratic in most of his starts. In ‘91 and ‘92 he led the league in walks and in ’93 and ’94 he led the league in hit batters. He also had over 200 strikeouts each of those years. The development of the Big Unit took a huge step upwards at the end of the 1992 season as he looked to Hall-of-Famer Nolan Ryan for help. Ryan noticed a flaw in his mechanics and the fix resulted in his patented slider, Mr. Snappy, becoming a lethal weapon, especially combined with his 100 mile per hour fastball. All of Randy’s accomplishments could compose a series of books, so the focus here will be on his defining moments with the Mariners. Not the no-hitter. Not the multiple one-hit masterpieces. Not the strikeouts. Not John Kruk’s infamous at-bat in the All-Star game. Randy has three specific defining moments with Seattle that ultimately affected the state of the Mariners today. In 1995, the Mariners team had the slogan “Refuse to Lose,” based on the late season heroics that saw them catch the Anaheim Angels, overcoming a 14-game divisional deficit. The Mariners and Angels tied for the best record in the American League West and were destined to play a one-game playoff to see which team would play the Yankees in the first round of the playoffs. Johnson pitched a three-hit shutout, dominating the Angels with 12 strikeouts. Defining moment number one was in the history books. The Mariners had finally won a division championship after 18 seasons and were on their way to the playoffs for the first time. Randy was unable to pitch in the five-game series against the heavily favored Yankees until Game 3 because of the one-game playoff, watching as Seattle fell behind two games to none. Seattle won game three behind the Unit’s seven-inning, 10 strikeout performance, but Game 5 is where his second defining moment came. The series was tied and game five was deadlocked at 4-4 after nine innings, when Randy was called upon in relief. His slow walk from the bullpen ignited the crowd and his teammates. He pitched the 10th, 11th, and 12th innings on short rest and allowed a run in the final frame as the Yankees looked poised to steal the series. The Mariners drew upon their refuse-to-lose attitude in the bottom of the 12th inning, winning the game on Edgar Martinez’ double that scored Ken Griffey Jr. Randy Johnson had played a pivotal part in the Mariners’ success in 1995 winning the Cy Young Award with an 18-2 record, a 2.48 ERA, and 294 punch-outs. However, Randy’s emotion and leadership was the catalyst that propelled the M’s to their most successful season to date and cemented him as a legend in Seattle. His last defining moment came in 1998. Following his fantastic 1997 season in which Johnson had a 20–4 record (the first 20-win season for a Mariner), 291 strikeouts, and a 2.28 ERA, the Mariners were distraught over their finances. Trying to figure out how to support a payroll that included big raises to many stars from the ’95 team as well as upcoming contract negotiations with Ken Griffey, Alex Rodriguez, and Randy Johnson, the Mariners chose to trade the Big Unit for a big ransom. The idea was that they might be able to resign one or maybe two of the three huge superstars and Randy was coming off back surgery in 1996. The risk out-weighed the reward and the upside of Alex Rodriguez was taking the focus of the team’s budget. Randy was sent to the Houston Astros midway through the 1998 season for pitchers John Halama, Freddy Garcia, and shortstop Carlos Guillen. Johnson was dominant the rest of his career winning four more Cy Young Awards, a World Series, and pitched a perfect game as a member of the Arizona Diamondbacks. In 1999, Griffey Jr. requested to be traded (following the death of his Orlando neighbor, golfer Payne Stewart) to be closer to his family. In 2000, Alex Rodriguez opted to sign a $250 million free-agent contract with Texas. Seattle had lost all three of their superstars. Mariners’ fans felt soulless and empty during the 2000 off-season despite the recent opening of Safeco Field that was built because of the success of the ’95 team. The players who were supposed to lead Seattle toward a dynasty were gone. The easiest one to sign may have been the Big Unit, but hindsight is 20/20, and the rest is history. Fortunately, for the Mariners, 2001 fielded a very productive team put together by free agent signings like Ichiro Suzuki and players obtained in the trades for the Big Unit and The Kid. Their success soothed the transition into the next chapter of Mariners’ history, but fans are still wondering what could have been if the Unit was a life-long Mariner. Randy won 130 games for the Mariners, more than he won with any of the other five teams he played for. He developed into a dominant force in Seattle. He owns 10 of the 15 greatest pitching efforts in Mariner history. Despite his grand success after leaving Seattle, when he goes into the Hall of Fame Mariner fans hope he is wearing a hat with a triad or a compass on it. That would be the ultimate defining moment for Seattle baseball. 12. How About an Encore? In 1993, the Mariners added a free-agent pitcher from Milwaukee named Chris Bosio. Randy Johnson threw the Mariners’ first no-hitter in 1990. Chris Bosio was no Randy Johnson, except on one night in April 1993, he may have thought he was. The game even started very “Big Unit-like” as Bosio was a little erratic and walked the first two batters he faced. Apparently, he overcame his nerves and found his control because he sat down the next 27 Boston Red Sox hitters: No hits, no walks, and no errors. A perfect game was pitched that night; it just started two batters too late. It may have been the most impressive game in Mariners history. Randy Johnson had several one-hit performances that were more impressive than his own no-hitter. Brian Holman and Eric Hanson also had magical nights, but a no-hitter is something on a higher level. No other Mariner has pitched a no-no since Bosio. He was never as good again as he was that night, retiring in 1997 after finishing three years in Seattle with a 27-31 record and a 4.43 ERA. He did return to the Mariners as a special assignment pitching coach from 2000-2002. During that time, the Mariners relied on pitching and defense in spacious Safeco Field. The M’s were coming off consecutive losing seasons, and the pitching successes that propelled the team through winning seasons in 2000-2002 (including the record 116 wins in 2001) were partly because of Bosio’s contributions. He made limited contributions as a player, but his no-hitter shows the Mariners are not just a one-trick pony when it comes to pitching. Still, he was no Randy Johnson. Next » 11. Its Kind of like Gum Stuck to Your Shoe With every step, the bottom of the shoe sticks to the surface. The cluster of goo is mostly harmless, though it could ruin the carpet or flooring and it is beyond annoying. Pick as you may, the complete residue of the sticky intruder will not fully remove itself from your sneaker. It gets stuck in the crevices of the tread and takes anchor. The shoes are placed aside as the annoyance is unbearable. Like the inevitable reoccurrence of a villain in a horror movie, the blob returns when you see the shoes while cleaning out the closet. Remembering the good times, you put them on and forget about the pestilent nature of the aforementioned partnership with Double-Bubble’s private reserve. This is how the relationship was between the Mariners and reliever Jeff Nelson. He was a little too outspoken. He was, at times, arrogant. He was sometimes just annoying. He was also very productive. Nelson played with the Mariners from 1992-1995. He was almost un-hittable as a set-up man in ’95, going 7-3 with a 2.14 ERA in 62 games. He had 96 strikeouts in 78 innings. He was paramount in holding opponents from scoring late in the game while the Mariners’ comeback kids won games in abundance in late innings. After the ’95 season he rubbed management the wrong way and they sent him to the New York Yankees before the 1996 season. He was productive in his Yankee years, but was just as abrasive. In 2000, Nelson told the New York press that Yankees manager and all-star game skipper Joe Torre would regret not naming him to the AL team at the 2000 Mid-Summer Classic. He became a free-agent after that season and the Yankees untied the laces and let loose of their tainted pair of shoes as well. Seattle signed Nelson, apparently desperate for slightly flawed, quality footwear. From 2001-2003, he formed the right side of Seattle's potent lefty/righty setup squad along with left-handed pitcher Arthur Rhodes. In 2001 he held opposing batters to a .136 batting average and a .199 slugging percentage. This time Torre bucked the trend and selected Nelson to the 2001 All-Star Game hosted in Seattle (resulting in Jamie Moyer being an all-star snub) and he was vindicated in his criticism from the previous year. The gum started to get sticky again in 2003. The Mariners were showing signs of losing their lead in the division race when Nelson blasted Seattle management as they failed to acquire an impact player at the trading deadline. Subsequently, the Mariners did make a trade, shipping their gooey shoes again to the Yankees. Once more, however, Nelson had the last laugh. He was productive in the post-season with the Yankees and the Mariners slowly lost the AL West lead and failed to make the post season by a very small margin. In 2005, those comfy shoes resurfaced again and Nelson started his third tour with the Mariners. He was mostly ineffective this time in an injury riddled season where he pitched sparingly before he was forced to retire. Jeff Nelson still holds the record for games pitched (432) and is second in career ERA (3.26) for Seattle. Nelson is second in post season games all-time behind former teammate Mariano Rivera. In his 55 playoff game appearances with Seattle and New York he held batters to a .191 average. Every time there was a magical moment in Seattle between 1995 and 2003, Jeff Nelson was a part of it. Every time there was a drop in production in that same time frame, Nelson was playing elsewhere. Maybe it wasn’t gum at all. Maybe he was the glue that held the team together. Next » 10. But I Didn’t Shoot the Deputy Mike Schooler’s arm issues left the Mariners without a real closer for the better part of the 1992 season. So, new manager Lou Piniella reached out to an old friend from his days in Cincinnati and Norm Charlton became the closer in 1993. Charlton was best known as one of the “Nasty Boys” in Cincinnati along with Rob Dibble and Randy Myers. Lou knew he could be a closer based on his 26 saves in 64 games for the Reds in 1992, but was probably surprised at how well “The Sheriff” took to the role. Norm pitched in 34 games in 1993, had 18 saves, and a 2.34 ERA before his elbow gave way and needed dreaded Tommy John surgery. The Sheriff was loved in Seattle and after a short time with the Phillies he was traded back to the M’s and was dominant again for half of the 1995 season. He appeared in 30 games and contributed 14 saves and a ridiculous 1.51 ERA in the Mariners’ run to the playoffs. He pitched for the Mariners in 1996, but his 20 saves in 70 games were not as impressive as his earlier performances and his ERA rose dramatically to 4.04. In 1997, it got even worse as his saves total dropped to just 14 in 71 games and his ERA ballooned to 7.27. There is only room for one thing in Seattle that has the numbers 727 on it and that is a commercial airplane produced by Boeing, so the "Sheriff" was asked to leave town by sunset. For some unknown reason, the Baltimore Orioles signed Norm to huge contract for the 1998 season. He was a big disappointment and was released on Jul. 28. Like Jeff Nelson, Charlton would call Seattle home a third time as a player. In 2001, he teamed up with Nelson, Kazuhiro Sasaki, and Arthur Rhodes to form one of the most successful bullpens in history. As a lefty specialist, The Sheriff was more like a deputy in the town he used to run, but his production was much better as his 44 appearances netted a respectable 3.02 ERA and he even picked up a save along the way. The 2001 team had an unprecedented regular season, never losing three games in a row all year long and with their shutdown bullpen they held opponents to 300 less runs than the Mariners’ offense scored. The Mariners led the league in most runs scored and least runs allowed. They set an American League record with 116 wins. That was the Sheriff’s last year and this time he rode off into the sunset on his terms with his head held high and M’s fans shedding tears of joy. 9. The Late (and Very Slow) Bloomer Mariners Trivia Speed Round... Question No. 1: Which Mariners’ pitcher holds the team record for career victories? Question No. 2: Which Mariners’ pitcher holds the team record for single season victories? Question No. 3: Which Mariners’ starting pitcher holds the team record for games played? Question No. 4: Which Mariners’ pitcher holds the team record for games started? Question No. 5: Which Mariners’ pitcher holds the team record for career ERA, complete games, shutouts and winning percentage? If you guessed Randy Johnson, you are correct, but only for question No. 5. The rest of the team records above all belong to the one of the most underrated pitchers in the history of baseball: Jamie Moyer. Moyer started out in the majors in 1986 as a starter with the Chicago Cubs. He spent the next 10 years with Texas, St. Louis, Baltimore, and the Red Sox as a starter and long reliever. He had limited success but was never deemed to have the tools to be a great pitcher. Then in 1996, he was traded to the Mariners after starting seven games for Boston. He was 7-1 with a 4.50 ERA for the Red Sox as a reliever and starter. He finished the season with Seattle and had a record of 6-2 as a starter. His 13-3 record led the majors in winning percentage and Moyer seemed to have found a home. Moyer would then put together a string of eight consecutive seasons with at least 13 wins. In 1997, Moyer was 17-5 with a 3.86 ERA. In 2001, he was 20-6 with a 3.43 ERA, and won an additional three games in the playoffs. He was not selected for the All-Star game as the Mariners already had Freddy Garcia, Jeff Nelson, and Kazuhiro Sasaki playing in the game. Even though his 20 wins tied Randy Johnson’s team record, he still had more to show. In 2002, he lowered his ERA to 3.32, but a lack of run support allowed him just 13 wins. In 2003, Moyer had his best year with a 21-7 record, a 3.27 ERA, and at the age of 40 he attended his first All-Star game as a player. It took him 18 years to accomplish the feat. How long has Moyer been around? He made his Major League debut with the Cubs out dueling Steve Carlton and the Phillies. He was the starting pitcher the day Greg Maddux made his debut in relief. Randy Johnson was the “young guy” when Moyer started his career in Seattle. Moyer once helped Fred Flintstone out of a big mess that even The Great Kazoo couldn’t cover up. Okay, that last one isn’t true. That is the special part about Jamie Moyer. He perseveres. He overcomes. He adapts. He helps. He never quits. Seriously, he never quits. He’s still pitching today. He will probably be the number five pitcher in the rotation for the two-time defending National League Champion Phillies in 2010, even after complications from a surgery at the end of 2009. He’ll never quit. Moyer’s changeup is legendary. Hitters know its coming. They know it's going to be cruising to the plate somewhere in the 80 mph range. They just haven’t been able to hit it consistently. Sure, Moyer isn’t going to win 20-plus games again, but he is still getting batters more than half his age out more often than they are getting hits. Moyer will be remembered by M’s fans for his levels of success, his leadership and his work ethic. He is the only Mariner to win 20 games in a season more than once. He was also a role model off the field, winning the Roberto Clemente Award, the Lou Gehrig Memorial Award, the Hutch Award, and the Branch Rickey Award. It’s a shame that mostly just Mariner fans know how great he was on the mound. By the way, the numbers to go along with the trivia questions: No. 1- Jamie Moyer, 145 (Randy Johnson had 130, Freddy Garcia had 76). No. 2- Jamie Moyer, 21. No. 3- Jamie Moyer, 324. No. 4- Jamie Moyer, 323. No. 5- Randy Johnson, 3.42, 51, 19, .900. Next » 8. The Missing Link Jamie Moyer had the best record for Seattle in 2001, but the ERA leader for the team was Venezuelan right-hander Freddy Garcia. In fact, Garcia’s 3.05 ERA actually led the American League. He also led the AL in innings pitched with 238. That was enough to earn him the first of two consecutive All Star Game appearances. Garcia was a key piece in the trade that sent Randy Johnson to Houston in 1998. Garcia, John Halama, and Carlos Guillen gave the Mariners some sort of solace for giving up possibly the greatest pitcher of the era. Garcia showed the most promise and delivered admirably during his years in Seattle. As a rookie in 1999, he pitched 33 games going 17-8 with a 4.07 ERA in 201 innings. Mariner fans were thinking that maybe losing the Big Unit wasn’t the end of the world. Garcia was an unexpected ace, Guillen was a capable starting shortstop, and Halama was serviceable as a back end of the rotation guy. The M’s filled three roster spots by letting one player go. Not a bad trade. After Garcia’s sophomore slump in 2000 where he went 9-5, he reeled off five consecutive double-digit win seasons including his standout season in 2001 and his very respectable 16-win 2002 season. He and Jamie Moyer gave the Mariners a very potent one-two punch at the top of the lineup. Not something that will rival Cliff Lee and Felix Hernandez, but they combined to win 38 games in 2001 which would rival the win totals of any two pitchers for the same team most years. Garcia would follow the trend of Mariner’s pitchers who later won a World Series with another team (see Randy Johnson, Mike Moore, Jamie Moyer, Jeff Nelson, etc.) as he was the starting pitcher for the Chicago White Sox in the clinching fourth game of the World Series in 2005. Freddy’s defining moment with the Mariners may not have anything to do with his play on the field. He should be known in Seattle baseball history as the evolutionary equivalent of the Sasquatch. He was the transitional pitcher, or the “link,” between past and present. Who knew the Northwest’s claim as the “home of Big Foot” was actually a Latin American transplant acquired in a trade with the Big Unit; the link to the past. Garcia was also the baseball hero of a well known prospect in his native Venezuela named Felix Hernandez; the link to the future. Mariner scouts had long known of Hernandez, but the unexpected success of Garcia was a big part in Hernandez deciding to sign with the Mariners. Therefore, Garcia not only took over the role of Randy Johnson, but he was also responsible, at least partially, for giving the Mariners a possible Hall of Fame starting pitcher of the future. Only time will tell the true contributions made to the Mariners by Freddy Garcia. If Hernandez fulfills his potential and stays with Seattle, the contribution would be immeasurable. Next » 7. Keeping It On the Down-Lowe The best organizations have the ability to consistently sign unknown players and develop them during their trek to the majors. Any team can make a star out of Ken Griffey Jr., Alex Rodriguez, or Alvin Davis. These are the kind of “can’t miss” prospects that you just step aside and let them do their thing. Every year there is at least one player who really steps up on a national stage that baseball experts never believed would be an impact player at the next level. Derek Lowe was one of those players… for the Boston Red Sox… twice. Once as a closer and once as a starter. Lowe was drafted in the eighth round in 1991. No big deal, right? He had some early success in Rookie and Single-A Leagues going 12-6 with a 2.41 ERA in 25 starts. He struggled a little in High A-ball in 1993, going 12-9, but his ERA exploded to 5.26 in 26 starts. In 1994-96, as he progressed through Double and Triple-A he was showing signs of being over matched with a 14-25 combined record in 52 starts with an ERA over five at three different stops. Despite Lowe’s inability to prove he should be a major leaguer, the Mariners saw the raw talent and promoted him to the big league team in 1997. In a couple appearances, he had limited success, but was soon traded to Boston with promising catcher Jason Varitek for aging closer Heathcliff Slocumb. Mike Schooler and Norm Charlton had proven to the Mariners just how important the role of the closer is in baseball. After Charlton struggled in 1996 and started off 1997 on a down note, the M’s decided they desperately needed a reliable arm at the end of the game. Slocumb seemed like a great choice. Heathcliff had 32 saves with the Phillies in 1995 and 31 with Boston in 1996 and his ERA was 2.89 and 3.02 respectively those years. However, in ’97 he began the year with 17 saves in Bean Town, but he was 0-5 with a 5.79 ERA in 49 games. The writing was on the wall, but the Mariners thought they could turn him around. Heathcliff was an utter failure in Seattle during his tenure from 1997-1998, finishing with a total of 13 saves, an ERA close to five, and a 2-9 record. The trade ended up being one of the most lopsided in recent MLB history. Lowe became a very effective closer for Boston, leading the league with 42 saves in 2000. He then went back to being a starter in 2002 finishing 21-8 with a 2.58 ERA. Along the way he pitched a no-hitter, the first in Fenway Park since 1965, and finished third in the Cy Young voting. Jason Varitek was a breakout catcher for the Red Sox: He became their Captain and the catalyst for their offense. Both players made big contributions in building the squad that won the 2004 World Series. The Mariners trading prowess they displayed with the Langston and Johnson trades took a big hit on this one and Derek Lowe will long be remembered for defining the lack of success for the Mariner teams of 1998-1999. They struggled with starting pitchers and relievers and had their only two losing seasons between 1995 and 2000. 6. Words Will Never Hurt Me Ever played that game, “Six degrees of separation to Kevin Bacon?" Omar Vizquel came up in the Mariners’ organization before being traded to the Cleveland Indians. Cleveland had fantastic, talented teams that made it to the World Series twice in three years, but lost both times. Jose Mesa was Omar’s teammate in Cleveland. Mesa failed to close out game seven of the 1997 post season classic and the Florida Marlins ended up winning the series. Mesa was out of Cleveland after 44 appearances in 1998 being sent to San Francisco. He joined the Mariners from 1999-2000. Mesa continued the string of closers who didn’t work out for the Mariners. His ERA was over five in his two years in Seattle and he was supplanted as the closer in 2000 after the M’s turned to Kazuhiro Sasaki. Arthur Rhodes and Jose Mesa played together in Seattle in 2000. Rhodes was not great that year with a 4.28 ERA in 72 games. Maybe Mesa was to blame because as soon as he left Seattle, Rhodes became almost unhittable. In 2001, Rhodes was 8-0 with a teeny 1.71 ERA. In 2002, he was 10-4 with a still remarkable 2.33 ERA. What was the secret to Rhodes’ success? Not steroids, PED’s, or HGH. Not wearing the same socks every night for six months straight. Not sacrificing a live chicken or installing religious alters at his locker. Maybe Rhodes’ secret weapon was his jewelry? In 2001, he was donning some huge, diamond earrings. Rumor has it they were so big the space shuttle crew once had to scrub a re-entry to the home planet as they could not see their instruments because of the glare emanating into space from Safeco Field. On Sept. 1, Omar Vizquel brought Rhodes’ jeweled secret to the national forefront. Rhodes was in as relief and was about to mow down the Indian’s lineup when Omar called time-out. He told the umpire that he could not focus because of the, oooh-shiny, distraction of the rocks attached to the pitcher’s earlobes. Arthur was told he needed to remove his earrings and he erupted in anger, no doubt fearing how he may pitch without his solar powered generators instilling his super powers. He was screaming at Omar. Omar was shouting back at him. Rhodes pointed at Omar’s head, either threatening to throw at him or insulting his fashion sense sans any glittery accessories. The argument got heated, benches cleared, and a brawl was imminent as Rhodes was ejected from the game. However, both teams finally realized there is no way they can hold their heads up if they got injured in a fight over jewelry. For the love of God, this is a sport and there is no room for sissy-fights over man-sparkles. The game went on, the season went on, and the Mariners ended up on a tear as they broke the single season win record for the American League. Thanks for the incentive, Omar. The next year a new rule was implemented prohibiting overly excessive or distracting jewelry on the field. Apparently, Omar liked the attention as he released his book, “Omar! My Life On and Off the Field,” in 2002. In the book he took a shot at ex-teammate Jose Mesa as being “completely empty” prior to allowing the Marlins to win the 1997 World Series. That started a long feud between Mesa and Vizquel, including threats of physical harm. Mesa said his family was upset. "Even my little boy told me to get him. If I face him 10 more times, I'll hit him 10 times. I want to kill him." Although it is very much like a metaphor for baseball: sticks (bats) and stones (baseballs) may break my bones, but… Jewelry? A book? Listen up, girls, there’s no crying in baseball. Next » 5. Baseball, Hot Dogs, Apple Pie and Japanese Baseball Players? The Mariners, as those in the Northwest know, are owned by the Japanese founded corporation, Nintendo of America. The company name itself lends insight into recent activity in regard to the diversity of players on the team, especially Asian based talent. Seattle and Nintendo have a strong desire to show that combining cultures can make for a productive and profitable venture be it in baseball or video games. Shortly after the video game giant purchased the Mariners, they started tapping the Japanese baseball market for new big league talent. The first Japanese player in an M’s uniform was Mac Suzuki. He was a relief pitcher who had a short career and limited contributions to the team from 1995-1998. Suzuki was the first Japanese born player to play in the American Majors without playing a game in Japan’s professional circuit. He was also the first Japanese player to pitch in the American League. From that point on, the stage was set for the M’s to continue with the Japanese player movement. The next candidate to audition for spot on the roster was a relief pitcher that was a dominant force in the Japanese major leagues named Kazuhiro Sasaki. He was selected to eight all-star teams in Japan. “Kaz” performed his new role to a tee, taking over as the Mariners’ closer and setting new standards in Seattle and Major League history. In addition to his Rookie of the Year Award in 2000, Sasaki also set several Major League Baseball records for Japanese-born players including most saves (45) and save opportunities (46) in a season, and was twice selected to play in the All-Star game. Sasaki's 37 saves in his initial season with the Seattle remains a MLB record for saves by a rookie of any nationality. Sasaki's out pitch, a devastating split-fingered fastball that drops when arriving at home plate, was nicknamed "The Thang". He complemented it with a four-seam fastball that could reach the low-90s. Sasaki maintained a rigorous throwing program that involved throwing up to 100 pitches following games in which he did not appear, mostly to the chagrin of Mariner management. Sasaki decided to leave the Mariners before the last year of his contract in 2004, giving up $8.5 million, citing his desire to be with his family in Japan. According to the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, however, Sasaki's real reason for returning to Japan was pressure from ownership, due to his "indiscreet philandering". There is no doubt he was a philanderer, but it was anything but discreet. Seattle fans loved Kaz, and Kaz loved them back. It was a global love affair that gave birth to the Mariner signings of Asian baseball players including Ichiro Suzuki, Shigetoshi Hasegawa, Sin-Shoo Choo, Cha Seung Baek, Kenji Johjima, and Masao Kida. It also opened the door to the hiring of the first Asian-American Manager in Don Wakamatsu (born in Oregon). After the abundant successes of Ichiro, Johjima, Sasaki, Hasegawa (Seattle’s single season ERA king), and Wakamatsu, Mariner fans and ownership alike are saying “domo arigato” (Japanese for “thank you very much”), Mr. Sasaki. Next » 4. Five. Five-Million-Dollar. Five-Million-Dollar Foot-Longs? From 2000-2003 the Seattle Mariners won at least 91 games each season. They had a strong fan base and were considered one of the most stable franchises in the league with a very promising farm system. In 2004, everything went haywire as the M’s tumbled to a 99-loss season. What happened at that point was a combination of offensive ineptitude from an aging roster and the complete collapse of their entire pitching staff due to youth, injuries, and poor run support. The Mariners’ veterans were now on the downhill side of their baseball prime. Their opening day starters included aging veterans Ichiro, Edgar Martinez, Bret Boone, John Olerud, Rich Aurilia, Randy Winn, Raul Ibanez, and Jamie Moyer. Only Ichiro and Moyer would remain with the Mariners after their very depressing 2005, 93-loss season. The M’s tried to offset some of the deficiencies in their offense by opening up the purse strings in 2005, signing Richie Sexson and Adrian Beltre to man the corners of the infield. The M’s offense didn’t really improve and in 2006 they weren’t going to spend any more money on batters after getting burned. The Mariners were trying to rebuild the pitching staff and the process could take a while. Felix Hernandez was a couple years away from consistency and the kids in the system just weren’t ready yet. Seattle was left with options of rushing guys to the majors, making trades, or signing a free agent. Free agency was the path they chose and Jarrod Washburn was their man, signing a four year, $37 million contract to compliment a rotation that included an aging Jamie Moyer, and inconsistent talents like Felix Hernandez, Gil Meche, and Joel Pineiro. From 2000-2002 with the Angels, Washburn looked like he could be a great pitcher as he went 36-18 with an ERA under four. His ERA and winning percentage worsened the next two years before rebounding in his “contract year.” Washburn was coming off a season where he was just 8-8, but had a very respectable 3.20 ERA before signing with the Mariners. Again, free agent signings were not kind as Seattle got Wash-“burned” over the next three seasons, with their new acquisition going 23-43 with an ERA over 4.50. While “Jared” of TV commercial fame was losing weight on a steady diet of Subway sandwiches, Jarrod was losing credibility as a starting pitcher with a steady diet of losses. He was the victim of seven blown saves in 2008, but he was 5-14 with a 4.69 ERA. Who’s the victim here? Not Washburn. His paychecks kept showing up in his bank account regardless of his performance. Just when the money looked like it would come to an end after 2009, Washburn turned it on in a “contract year” once again. He jumped out to a career best 2.64 ERA in 20 starts and an 8-6 record, including a masterful one-hitter on July 6th. It is the only one-hitter in Safeco Field since opening in 1999. Washburn finally had some value to the Mariners as a mid-season trade option and the Detroit Tigers gave up two, low level pitching prospects in Luke French and Maurice Robles to acquire the re-born pitcher. Washburn would have the last laugh again, struggling with an injury and finishing the season 1-3 with a 7.33 ERA. He was not signed by Detroit and is still a free agent. Apparently, no other teams are going to bite on the Jarrod who doesn’t work for Subway. Seattle has shown some limited interest in resigning him for 2010 to fill out the back end of the rotation. He would have to take a big discount in salary for Seattle to bring him back and then he could start repaying all the money he didn’t earn in his previous contract. Maybe they could have a Subway night at Safeco Field where fans get a free sandwich if this Jarrod “loses weight” on his ERA? 3. “Putz-up” or Shut-up! The word “putz” is defined as a person who is a fool or a jerk. No wonder former Mariners’ closer J.J. Putz insists his name is pronounced differently: claiming it sounds like “puts” instead. As in, the Mariner manager puts his closer in at the end of the game to nail down a victory. In Seattle, that is exactly what Putz did between 2006 and 2008. He took over for an aging “Every day” Eddie Guardado a few weeks into the ’06 season and never looked back on his way to a sensational first year as a closer. Putz converted 36 of 43 save opportunities while posting a 2.30 ERA and struck out 104 batters in just 78 innings. Putz was at it again in 2007 after signing a three year, $13.1 million deal with the Mariners. He improved on his previous year stats with 40 saves in 42 chances, a 1.38 ERA and 82 K’s in 72 innings. Putz was the “Delivery Man of the Month” winner in June, made the All-Star team, and became the only Seattle Mariner to win the Rolaids Relief Man of the Year award. He also broke Guardado’s team record of 27 consecutive games saved which ended at 30. In just two years, Putz ranked second in career and single season saves totals in Mariner team history behind only Kazuhiro Sasaki. In 2008, when his value was at its apex, Putz was part of a three-team, twelve-player blockbuster trade involving the New York Mets and the Cleveland Indians. Along with J.J., The Mets also got outfielder Jeremy Reed, and reliever Sean Green. The plan was to solidify their bullpen a day after signing free agent closer Francisco Rodriguez. The Cleveland Indians got a second base prospect named Luis Valbuena from the Mariners and relief pitcher Joe Smith from the Mets and sent promising outfielder Franklin Gutierrez to Seattle. The Mariners ended up getting a stockpile of players from the Mets in the deal including reliever/starter Aaron Heilman, outfielder Endy Chavez, and three prospects (first baseman Mike Carp, reliever Maikel Cleto, and outfielder Ezequil Carrera). There are three huge aspects of this trade for Seattle fans: First, as an all world defender with huge offensive upside, Franklin Gutierrez was the prize of the trade for the M's; Second, getting Aaron Heilman allowed Seattle to make two other trades (with Chicago Cubs and Pittsburgh Pirates) that eventually netted the Mariners starting pitcher Ian Snell and short stop Jack Wilson; Third, this trade signified the start of many important moves by new GM Jack Zduriencik, who in a very short amount of time has helped turn the Mariners around and is being raved about in baseball circles as a genius hire by Seattle. Although, Heilman and Chavez had limited success as Mariners neither are part of the Mariner team of 2010. Chavez had season ending surgery and signed a free agent minor league contract with the Texas Rangers. Heilman was traded to the Chicago Cubs in January, 2009 for Ronny Cedeño and Garrett Olson. Cedeno was later traded to the Pittsburgh Pirates along with the M's top rated prospect, catcher Jeff Clement and three Single-A level pitching prospects. The Mariners got starter Ian Snell and defensive short stop Jack Wilson from Pittsburgh. The trades go down as a huge success for the Mariners as Gutierrez has been good offensively and covers center field like a blanket. Wilson gives Seattle a huge upgrade defensively at short stop. Mike Carp looks like he'll eventually be a major leaguer with some pop in his bat. Ultimately, Putz gave Seattle his best years to date, as he was a colossal disappointment with the Mets and they declined to pick up his 2010 team option. He signed with the Chicago White Sox in the offseason. Although Mets fans probably pronounce his name incorrectly, Putz was dynamite for Seattle. The Mariners will miss Jeff Clement, especially given the uncertain status of their current catching candidates. Cedeno, Heilman, Clement and the other prospects could end up having some great value for Pittsburgh/Mets/Cleveland down the line, but right now it appears Seattle got a great return based on what they gave up. The Mariners are on the right track to winning with Jack Zduriencik calling the shots. Trading J.J. Putz was the start of a string of decisions that have put the Mariners back into a position to contend for the division in 2010. Putz' defining moments on the field were solid, but the chain reactions set forth by letting him go and how all the players end up performing for their respective teams will utlimately determine his overall contributions to the Mariners. Right now, Seattle is a better team (especially after discovering closer David Aardsma last season) than they were prior to the trades. Next » 2. Did You Get the License Number of that Truck? Mariner history is riddled with trades. Some were great, like Ken Phelps for Jay Buhner. Some were awful, like Jason Varitek and Derek Lowe for Heathcliff Slocumb. Some were a “wash," like Randy Johnson for Freddy Garcia, John Halama, and Carlos Guillen. On February 8, 2008, the Mariners may have completed possibly the worst trade in Major League history. The Baltimore Oriole’s pitching ace, Erik Bedard, was on the market for the right price and Seattle decided they would pay above and beyond the fair market value. The Mariners sent five players, including soon-to-be all stars Adam Jones and George Sherrill, as well as starting pitcher Chris Tillman, and prospects Kameron Mickolio and Tony Butler to the O’s. The Mariners got an above average pitcher with upside who had a limited resume of success. Bedard (pronounced “bay-dar” from his Canadian origins) got off to a horrible start for Seattle during spring training in 2008, leading the exhibition season in home runs allowed with nine. By July, he was on the disabled list ending all hope of making an impact in his first season with Seattle. Erik finished with a 6-4 record and a respectable 3.67 ERA, but pitched in only 15 games totaling 81 innings. That was not exactly what the M’s expected from him based on the talent they parted with. Seattle hoped for 15-20 wins and 200 innings. Even with those levels of success, the deal may have been more one-sided for Baltimore. More injuries crept up in 2009 as Bedard finished a twin-like season in Seattle with just 15 more games, a 5-3 record and a very good 2.82 ERA in just 83 innings. In two years, the Mariners got 11 wins out of the trade and fans were thinking that Tillman, once the most treasured arm in the farm system, could have accomplished that much by himself. The bottom line is that the Mariners gave up five quality players and a good portion of the gold bullion in Fort Knox for just 30 games as Bedard became a free agent after season-ending surgery in 2009. Ouch. When he was healthy, he was the pitcher the M’s wanted, so they decided to sign him to an incentive laden, $1.5 million contract for 2010 with an option for 2011. If he comes back from his surgery and pitches like he was able to in 2007 when healthy, he’ll be a steal at that price. He is not due to pitch until at least May or June, but he can contribute more than half a season with Felix Hernandez and Cliff Lee toward a pennant race and the playoffs and could be the decisive factor on how far the Mariners can go in 2010. For now, Mariner fans feel like they’ve been run over by a bus and the best case scenario with Bedard still wouldn’t make the tread marks disappear. Next » 1. Talking ‘Bout My Generation King Felix reigns in Seattle. Felix Hernandez is the future for the Mariners and they committed to signing him to a five-year contract extension in the off-season. Mariner fans hope Felix is the one true Hall of Fame player to start and end his career in the Northwest, and not contribute anything to other organizations in between except an abundance of losses. That would make the King of diamonds the King of hearts in Seattle. Ultimately, Hernandez could define the Mariners’ greatest triumphs, surpassing even the Big Unit and the Old Man. He is coming off a runner-up finish for the coveted Cy Young award. He will turn 24 years old on Apr. 8 and already has 58 wins in his short career. If he averages 15 wins per year, he could reach 300 wins at the age of 40 and join the Big Unit and Gaylord Perry as the only 300 games winners to wear a Mariner uniform. He is one of only a few youngsters in the Majors with a legitimate shot at reaching the lofty plateau. Of course, that is a generation away and there is no counting chickens before they hatch. The focus should be short term and what he can help the Mariners accomplish this year. Like souls in Hell searching for a mythical glass of ice-water, Seattle is yearning for their first World Series appearance. The Mariners, Texas Rangers, and Montreal Expos/Washington Nationals are the only teams never to make it to the fall classic. Hernandez and Cliff Lee will don Mariner Blue and Teal this year in hopes of creating their own defining moments in Seattle. If they have a great season and seem to gel as teammates, could Felix help convince Lee to accept a contract extension with Seattle? That would be a defining moment. Felix is younger than Lee and Seattle needs to focus on keeping him in the starting rotation for a decade following his current contract, so the financial aspects of signing Lee seem a bit unlikely. Mariner fans have endured over 30 years of disappointment and regardless of individual shining stars, they want just one thing for their current group of players. Jewelry worth fighting for: A World Series Ring.

i don't know

A poor workman always blames his what?

a bad workman always blames his tools - Wiktionary a bad workman always blames his tools Definition from Wiktionary, the free dictionary not the tools but how they're employed Chinese: Icelandic: árinni kennir illur ræðari   (is) (a bad rower blames his oar) Japanese: 下手な職人は、いつも道具に文句をつける ‎(heta na shokunin wa, itsumo dōgu ni monku o tsukeru) Malay: Polish: złej baletnicy szkodzi rąbek przy spódnicy Russian: плохо́му танцо́ру и я́йца меша́ют   (ru) ‎(ploxómu tancóru i jájca mešájut) (bad dancer is impeded even by (his own) balls), не́ча на зе́ркало пеня́ть, ко́ли ро́жа крива́ ‎(néča na zérkalo penjátʹ, kóli róža krivá) (don't blame the mirror if your mug is skewed), ма́стер глуп — нож туп ‎(máster glup — nož tup) (if the worker is stupid, his knife is blunt)

Tool

What fictional detective is featured in the novel/movie "The Hound of the Baskervilles"?

The bad workman : Famous Proverbs and Quotes Shop Famous Proverbs and Quotes Shop    Enter your email below to receive product features and specials in your inbox!   Famous Proverbs and Quotes Shop > The bad workman The bad workman always blames his tools - T-shirts, stickers, apparel and gifts for classic quote and proverb lovers.

i don't know

Whose labors include such tasks as slaying the Nemean lion, cleaning the Augean stables in a single day, and obtaining the Girdle of the Amazon Queen?

Greek Mythology: Twelve Labors of Hercules Twelve Labors of Hercules                             12 Labors of Hercules                                                   Hercules  was the son of Zeus and Alcmene , granddaughter of Perseus . Zeus swore that the next son born of the Perseid house should become ruler of Greece, but by a trick of Zeus’s jealous wife, Hera , another child, the sickly Eurystheus, was born first and became king; when Hercules grew up, he had to serve him and also suffer the vengeful persecution of Hera . His first exploit, in fact, was the strangling of two serpents that she had sent to kill him in his cradle.  Later, Hercules waged a victorious war against the kingdom of Orchomenus in Boeotia and married Megara, daughter of Creon, king of Thebes. But he killed her and their children in a fit of madness sent by Hera. In desperate remorse he sought the advice of the oracle at Delphi where the Pythian priestess told him to expiate his crime by serving King Eurystheus for 12 years. During this 12-year period Hercules had to perform the 10 labors the king would require of him. Labor 1 - Slay the Nemean Lion.                                              Eurystheus ordered Hercules to bring him the skin of the Nemean Lion. In Greek mythology, the Nemean lion took women as hostages to its lair in a cave near Nemea, luring warriors from nearby towns to save the damsel in distress. After entering the cave, the warrior would see the woman (usually feigning injury) and rush to her side. Once he was close, the woman would turn into a lion and kill the warrior, devouring his remains and giving the bones to Hades.                                 Hercules wandered the area until he came to the town of Cleonae. There he met a boy who said that if Heracles slew the Nemean lion and returned alive within 30 days, the town would sacrifice a lion to Zeus; but if he did not return within 30 days or he died, the boy would sacrifice himself to Zeus. According to other version, Hercules met Molorchos, a shepherd who had lost his son to the lion, saying that if he came back within 30 days, a ram would be sacrificed to Zeus. If he did not return within 30 days, it would be sacrificed to the dead Hercules as a mourning offering. Hercules and Nemean Lion                   Hercules wondered for many a days before he came to the cave of the Nemean lion. Hercules hid behind a rock and laid in wait for the lion to return home. Later in the evening the lion returned home. Hercules jumped out from his hiding and shot the lion with his bow and arrow. Hercules was shocked and surprised when the arrow hit the lion and bounced off.                   Hercules ran and the lion chased. Eventually Hercules was able to get away from the lion. The next day the Nemean lion left his cave and Hercules blocked off the back entrance to the lions cave and hid waiting for the lion to return. Later that night the lion returned home and went into his cave. Hercules jumped into the cave and stood between the lion and the front entrance. Already blocking off the back entrance the lion had no place to go. In the dark of the cave Hercules wrestled the lion and eventually slayed the lion with his bare hands.                                  After slaying the lion, when Hercules tried to remove the lions fur he could not cut it. Hercules sharpened his knife with a rock and tried again, he even tried the rock, but nothing would cut the lions fur. Eventually Athena showed up and told Hercules to use the lions own claws to remove the fur. With great success with the help Athena's advice, Hercules was able to remove the lion's fur.                             Hercules left and headed back to the king to show him the lions pelt as proof of his task being complete. When Hercules showed the lion's fur to the king, the king was afraid and forbid Hercules from coming into the city again. Hercules was told that he could prove the remained of his tasks outside the city gates. The king warned Hercules that the tasks would become harder and harder. He then sent Hercules off to complete his next quest, which was to destroy the Lernaean hydra. Labor 2 - Slay the nine-headed Lernaean Hydra.                                    After the slaying of the Nemean lion, Eurystheus sent Hercules to slay the Hydra, which Hera had raised just to slay Hercules. Hercules set off with a bow and arrows and his magic gold sword (a gift from the goddess Athena) to find and slay the hydra. Hercules came across the swamp where the hydra lived. Hercules covered his mouth and nose with cloth so he wouldn't get harmed (or have to smell) the nasty hydra breath. He shot a flaming arrow and the hydra, and the hydra came after Hercules. Hercules made quick work of the 8 magic heads, and went to strike the final blow when the magic heads sprung back to life now 16 heads. Hercules tried again, and each time he cut a head of 2 more heads appeared. Hercules realizing that this wasn't going to work retreated into the forest. Hercules and Hydra                                               Hercules found his nephew Lolous and asked him to help. The plan was Hercules would cut off the head, and before 2 more would grow back it was Lolous job to burn the cut neck of the hydra. So Hercules with his nephew in toe traveled back to the swamp to beat the hydra.                                                             Hercules and his nephew arrived at the swamp and were met by the hydra that had too many heads to count. Hercules sprang to work cutting off the heads of the hydra with his magic gold sword. Right behind him with a torch was his nephew Lolous who would then burn the necks.                                       Enraged with Hercules’s progress of slaying the hydra Hera sent a giant crab to distract and pinch Hercules’s. The crab was no match for the hero and he quickly crushed the crab with his foot. When all but one head was gone, Hercules dipped an arrow into the poisonous blood of the hydra, and shot the hydra's last remaining head. With the poisoned arrow piercing the hydra's last neck, it died. Hercules collected the poisonous blood of the hydra to add to his arsenal of magical tools.                                                              Hercules returned to the king to tell him of his victory. The king told Hercules that because he received help that slaying the Hydra didn't count and he would have to do another labor. Hera was so upset about her special "pets" she decided to immortalize the hydra and the crab in the stars, and that’s why how we have the constellations cancer and the hydra. Labor 3 - Capture the Golden Hind of Artemis.                                                    After Hercules successfully slayed the Nemean Lion and the Nine-Headed Hydre of Lerneaen he returned to the king for his 3rd task. King Eurystheus and goddess Hera , were angry that Hercules was able to escape his death both times. After some consideration they decided to give Hercules the task of hunting down the special gold deer of Artemis . The golden deer was very sacred to goddess Artemis, and Eurystheus and Hera hoped that by having Hercules capture her sacred golden deer, that this would anger Artemis and she would put an end to Hercules. Golden stag of Artemis                                       Hercules set out to hunt down and capture the golden stag of Artemis. Hercules spent many days and nights wondering the forest in search of the stag. One morning he was awoken by the glistening rays of the sun of the stags antlers. Hercules took chase after the deer. He chased the deer for a year all around Greece and the neighboring countries.                                                        Finally one night while the deer was sleeping, Hercules crept up to the sleeping animal and was able to catch him by throwing a net over the sleeping animal. At once Artemis appeared before Hercules. Hercules begged forgiveness from the goddess. Hercules explained how he needed to capture Artemis deer for redemption of his crimes. He promised to let the stag go once he had shown it to the king.  Artemis forgave Hercules and said as long as he lets the deer go she will not harm him.                                                                 Hercules returned to the city gates with the deer. The king told Hercules that the deer was to become part of the kings pets, Hercules knew if the deer didn't return Artemis would hurt Hercules. So thinking fast Hercules agreed to give the king the deer under one condition, that the king come outside the city gates and get the deer himself. The king agreed. When Hercules let the deer go to hand to king Eurystheus the deer sprinted back to Artemis. King Eurystheus was furious, but Hercules told the king the reason the deer got away was the king was not fast enough.   Eurystheus, upset that Hercules had managed to overcome yet another creature, told him to bring the fearsome Erymanthian Boar back to him alive. Labor 4 - Capture the Erymanthian Boar.                                       In Greek mythology, the Erymanthian Boar was a giant wild boar, which was also sacred to Artemis at one time. The boar lived high on top the Mount Erymanthos. This boar was a favorite of the gods. The Erymanthian boar was sent to do all of the gods and goddess dirty work. The Erymanthian Boar killed Adonis and would be sent to destroy villages for not paying homage to certain gods.                                                                 Winter had come and Hera and King Eurystheus decided that for Hercules next task he would have to capture the Erymanthian Boar. In terms of difficulty this labor turns out to be pretty easy. Hercules and Erymanthian Boar                                    So Hercules set off to capture this boar. Along the way Hercules decided to stop by and visit his friend Pholus, a friendly centaur. Pholus and Hercules sat down to dinner and talked. Hercules asked Pholus for advice on how to defeat and capture The Erymanthian Boar. Pholus told Hercules that he would be able to capture the boar if he chased him into the deep snow.                                  With his friend’s advice, Hercules set off to find the boar. With some searching and a little luck Hercules found the boar. Hercules charged the boar and sent it running. Hercules did just as his friend had suggested and chased the giant boar into the deep snow. The Erymanthian Boar became stuck within the deep snow and was unable to move. Hercules moved in and captured the boar.                           Hercules took the boar back to King Eurystheus. When the king saw the boar he became frightened and told Hercules to get rid of the Erymanthian Boar. As commanded Hercules picked up the boar and hurled it into the sea. Labour 5 - Clean the Augean stables in a single day.                                   The fifth Labor of Hercules was to clean the Augean stables. This assignment was intended to be both humiliating (rather than impressive, as had the previous labors) and impossible. These particular stables housed thousands of cattle, sheep, goats, and horses and the stable had not been cleaned in 30 years. The Augean king was said to have more cattle then any man in Greece.                              When Hercules showed up he offered to clean the stables in a single day for one tenth of the Augean king's entire cattle. Hercules did not say anything about how he was sent by Eurystheus or about his labors of redemption. The Augean King was so shocked at his fortune he agreed to pay Hercules, if he could do it in one day.                                              Hercules took the Augean king's son (Phyleus) with him to witness the stables being cleaned. Hercules set to work tearing a big hole in the front of the stable yards. Next Hercules made a hole in the back wall of the stable yards. Hercules then dug a trench between 2 rivers flowing nearby. He then diverted the 2 rivers into the front of the stable yards and out the rear of the stable yards and back into the river with taking all the filth along with it.                                            Hercules returned to the Augean King to collect his payment. The Augean king had found out that Eurystheus had been the one to send Hercules and refused to pay him saying that if Hercules did not agree he could always take the Augean King to court. So Hercules did just that. Hercules even had the Augean King's son testify that his father did indeed promise to pay Hercules one tenth of all his cattle. The King reluctantly paid Hercules and then promptly banished him from his kingdom.                                                      Hercules returned to Eurystheus to inform the king of the completion of Hercules labor. Eurystheus had found out that Hercules was paid for his cleaning out of the stables, and therefore told Hercules that this labor (just like the 2nd labor) didn't count. Labor 6 - Slay the Stymphalian Birds.                                                 After cleaning the Augean Stables, Eurystheus sent Hercules to defeat the Stymphalian birds, man-eating birds with beaks of bronze and sharp metallic feathers they could launch at their victims.  Furthermore, their dung was highly toxic. They had migrated to Lake Stymphalia in Arcadia, where they bred quickly and took over the countryside, destroying local crops, fruit trees and townspeople. Hercules could not go too far into the swamp, for it would not support his weight.   Goddess Athena, noticing the hero's plight, gave Hercules a special noise maker which Hephaestus had made especially for the occasion. Hercules arrived at Lake Stymphalia and  hundreds of Stmphalian birds, nesting all over the lake, and in the trees. Hercules pulled out his new gift and filled the air with the loud and melodious sound. The Stymphalian birds where scared and took flight into the air. Hercules pulled out his bow and Arrow, and set the arrows on fire. He then shot the Stymphalian birds while in the air. One by one the Birds fell dead. Hercules slayed 100 of the Stymphalian birds, and the rest flew off into the sky never to be heard of or seen again.                                                                                                                                                           According to some versions, Argonauts would later encounter them. Hercules picked up a dozen of the birds, and took them back to King Eurystheus.  Labour 7 - Capture the Cretan Bull.                                             Hercules was then sent to capture the Cretan Bull by Eurystheus as his seventh task. In Greek mythology, the Cretan Bull was a gift from Poseidon to King Minos of Crete. The Cretan Bull also was father of the Minotaur by Pasiphae . The Cretan bull was a very sweet and gentle beast that is until king Minos upset Poseidon. Poseidon struck the bull driving the bull insane and then the Cretan bull ran wild through all Crete knocking down orchard walls, and destroying crops.  Hercules and Cretan Bull                                Hercules sailed to Crete, whereupon the King Minos gave Hercules permission to take the bull away and offered him assistance, but Hercules refused King Minos help. Hercules set off to find the bull. He found the bull drinking from a water spring, and snuck up behind the bull. Grabbing the bull by the horns, Hercules wrestled the bull to the ground and tied the bull up so it could not escape.                                      With the bull successfully subdue, Hercules took the bull with him and sailed back to King Eurystheus. When the king saw how massive the bull was he was frightened. He told Hercules, that they should sacrifice the bull to goddess Hera.  Hera refused the sacrifice because it reflected glory on Hercules. The bull was released and wandered into Marathon, becoming known as the Marathonian Bull. In some versions, Theseus later sacrifice the bull to Athena or Apollo. Eurystheus next sent Hercules to bring back the man-eating Mares of Diomedes. Labor 8 - Steal the Mares of Diomedes.                                          After capturing the Cretan Bull, Hercules was than sent to steal the Mares of Diomedes. Hercules travelled to the shores of the Black Sea to meet King Diomedes. Diomedes was  the son of the god Ares and Cyrene . King Diomedes was a savage. Diomedes mares were four man eating horses - Podargos (swift-footed), Lampon (the shining), Xanthos (the blond) and Deinos (the terrible).  Diomedes enjoyed feeding strangers and prisoners to his mares.  His mares could not be controlled, they were savage, just like the King. The mare needed to be tethered to a bronze manger by chains, so they would not escape.                      Upon arrival Hercules, knowing how King Diomedes treats strangers, wrestles with him, trying to bring King Diomedes to the stables, where the mares live. Even though Heracles is said to have unmatched strength, it is a long and reasonably even match, since Diomedes himself is the son of the god of war. He soon loses to Hercules. Hercules then feed Diomedes to his own  man eating horses. Being half god the flesh of Diomedes made the horses calm and wild no more.  Hercules was easily able to bring the mares back to King Eurystheus.  Eurytheus dedicates the mares to goddess Hera. According to other version, the mares were released and free to roam Argos. One of their descendants was said to be the horse of Alexander the Great.  Labor 9 - Obtain the girdle of Hippolyta, Queen of the Amazons.                                   Eurystheus' daughter Admete wanted the belt of Hippolyta, a gift to the queen of the Amazons from the war god Ares. To please his daughter, Eurystheus ordered Hercules to retrieve the belt as his ninth labour. Taking a band of friends with him, Hercules set sail, stopping at the island of Paros, which was inhabited by some of Minos' sons. The sons killed two of Hercules' companions, an act which set Hercules on a rampage. He killed two of Minos ' sons and threatened the other inhabitants until he was offered two men to replace his fallen companions. Hercules agreed and took two of Minos' grandsons, Alcaeus and Sthenelus. They continued their voyage and landed at the court of Lycus, whom Hercules defended in a battle against the king of the Bebryces, Mygdon. After killing King Mygdon, Hercules gave much of the land to his friend Lycus. Lycus called the land Heraclea. The crew then set off for Themiscyra where Hippolyta lived.                                           Hippolyta, queen of the Amazons, impressed with Hercules and his exploits, agreed to give him the belt and would have done so had Hera not disguised herself and walked among the Amazons sowing seeds of distrust. She claimed the strangers were plotting to carry off the queen of the Amazons. Alarmed, the women set off on horseback to confront Hercules. When Hercules saw them, he thought Hippolyta had been plotting such treachery all along and had never meant to hand over the belt, so he killed her, took the belt and returned to Eurystheus. Eurystheus, shocked that Hercules survived his encounter with the Amazons, immediately sent him to capture the cattle of Geryon. Labour 10 - Obtain the cattle of the monster Geryon.           Hercules was required to travel to the far-off western Mediterranean island of Erytheia, in order to obtain the Cattle of Geryon as his tenth labour. On the way there, he crossed the Libyan desert and became so frustrated at the heat that he shot an arrow at Helios, the Sun. Helios "in admiration of his courage" gave Hercules the golden cup he used to sail across the sea from west to east each night.                             As soon as Hercules landed at Erytheia, he was confronted by the two-headed dog, Orthrus. With one huge blow from his olive-wood club, Hercules killed the watchdog. Eurytion the herdsman came to assist Orthrus, but Hercules dealt with him the same way. Hercules and Geryon                                          On hearing the commotion, Geryon sprang into action, carrying three shields, three spears, and wearing three helmets. He pursued Hercules at the River Anthemus but fell victim to an arrow that had been dipped in the venomous blood of the Lernaean Hydra, shot so forcefully by Hercules that it pierced Geryon's forehead, "and Geryon bent his neck over to one side, like a poppy that spoils its delicate shapes, shedding its petals all at once". Hercules then had to herd the cattle back to Eurystheus.  To annoy Hercules, Hera sent a gadfly to bite the cattle, irritate them and scatter them. The hero was within a year able to retrieve them. Hera then sent a flood which raised the level of a river so much, Hercules could not cross with the cattle. He piled stones into the river to make the water shallower. When he finally reached the court of Eurystheus, the cattle were sacrificed to Hera. Labor 11 - Steal the apples of the Hesperides                                                         After Hercules completed his first ten Labours, Eurystheus gave him two more claiming that neither the Hydra counted (because Iolaus helped Hercules) nor the Augean stables (either because he received payment for the job or because the rivers did the work). The first of these two additional Labours was to steal the apples from the garden of the Hesperides. Hercules first caught the Old Man of the Sea, the shape-shifting sea god, to learn where the Garden of the Hesperides was located.                            In some versions, Hercules, either at the start or at the end of his task, meets Antaeus, who was invincible as long as he touched his mother, Gaea , the earth. Hercules killed Antaeus by holding him aloft and crushing him in a bearhug.                         In some versions, Hercules stopped in Egypt, where King Busiris decided to make him the yearly sacrifice, but Hercules burst out of his chains. Hercules and Atlas                                      Finally making his way to the Garden of the Hesperides, Hercules tricked Atlas into retrieving some of the golden apples for him, by offering to hold up the heavens for a little while. This would have made this task – like the Hydra and Augean stables – void because he had received help. Upon his return, Atlas decided that he did not want to take the heavens back, and instead offered to deliver the apples himself, but Hercules tricked him again by agreeing to take his place on condition that Atlas relieve him temporarily so that Hercules could make his cloak more comfortable. Atlas agreed, but Hercules reneged and walked away, carrying the apples. According to other version, Hercules slew Ladon, the dragon-like guardian of the apples. Furious that Hercules had accomplished something that Eurystheus thought could not possibly be done, he sent Hercules off to his final task, the capture of Cerberus, the three-headed guardian hound of the gates of the Underworld. Labor 12 - Capture and bring back Cerberus.                            Capturing Cerberus alive, without using weapons, was the final labour assigned to Hercules by Eurystheus, in recompense for the killing of his own children by Megara after he was driven insane by Hera, and therefore was the most dangerous and difficult.                                      After having been given the task, Hercules went to Eleusis to be initiated in the Eleusinian Mysteries so that he could learn how to enter and exit the underworld alive, and in passing absolve himself for killing centaurs. He found the entrance to the underworld at Tanaerum, and Athena and Hermes helped him to traverse the entrance in each direction. He passed Charon with Hestia's assistance and his own heavy and fierce frowning.Whilst in the underworld, Hercules met Theseus and Pirithous . The two companions had been imprisoned by Hades for attempting to obtain Persephone. In some versions, the snakes coiling around their legs then turning into stone. In other version, that Hades feigned hospitality and prepared a feast inviting them to sit. They unknowingly sat in chairs of forgetfulness and were permanently ensnared. When Hercules had pulled Theseus first from his chair,  but the earth shook at the attempt to liberate Pirithous, whose desire to have the wife of a god for himself was so insulting he was doomed to stay behind. Hercules and Cerberus Hercules found Hades and asked permission to bring Cerberus to the surface, which Hades agreed to if Hercules could overpower the beast without using weapons. Hercules was able to overpower Cerberus and proceeded to sling the beast over his back, dragging it out of the underworld through a cavern entrance in the Peloponnese and bringing it to Eurystheus. Eurystheus asked Hercules to return it to the underworld in return for releasing him from his labors. After completing the labours Hercules joined the Argonauts in the search for the Golden Fleece.

Hercules

With 18 major championships, what golfer is nicknamed “The Golden Bear”?

Hercules (Character) - Comic Vine Into the Marvel Universe Hercules: Circa 1967 Hercules appears as a character very similar to Thor in strength, nobility, pride, divine origin, demeanor and his relationship with his father. In subsequent early appearances, during battles against both Thor and the Hulk , Hercules is shown to have a more carefree attitude and to be more reckless than Thor. These characteristics are what what differentiated him Thor the most. Later, when he was exiled from Olympus , Hercules filled the role of strongman and deity as a member of the Avengers for a time. During this, his first stint as an Avenger, Hercules was shown to be a brooding type who longs to return to Olympus. It's also during this stint as an Avenger that Hercules' skill as a ladies' man was first hinted at when he dated the Scarlet Witch and also when the Enchantress , who usually makes her opponents fall in love with her, becomes enamored with him. As one of the earliest Avengers, Hercules faced several of their earliest foes such as the Super-Adaptoid , Dragon Man , the Mad Thinker , Red Guardian , Namor and Skurge the Executioner before he battled and defeated the Olympian Gods' deadliest enemy: Typhon and thereby rescuing his father Zeus and the rest of the Olympian gods from the extra-dimensional realm Typhon had banished them to. In light of Hercules defeating Typhon and saving him and his fellow gods, Zeus decreed Hercules' exile to be over. Glad that his exile was over and happy to be back in his father's good graces, Hercules bid farewell to his teammates and left the Avengers to return to Olympus where he could be with his Olympian brethren. Champions Hercules stars in the Champions Hercules characterization in the Bronze Age was still quite similar to that of Thor. He continued to be depicted as immensely prideful and confident. Hercules appeared as a recurring character in "Thor" during the early 1970's where he first battled against and then partnered with Thor for a lengthy period. Together they faced a multitude of powerful adversaries including; the Destroyer , Pluto, Ares, the Dweller in the Darkness , Firelord , Galactus and Ego the Living Planet . This added exposure garnered Hercules enough popularity to allow him to become the lead character in a short-lived group/team comic called "the Champions. " This series was set in Los Angeles. This was the first time Hercules became the main focus of a comic and the major hero on a team. It was also here where Hercules' nature as an impulsive hero became more established and expounded upon. The Champions battled for justice for a relatively short period before disbanding due to a lack of cohesiveness amongst the various members. During his time with the Champions, Hercules faced foes such as the Stranger , the Sentinels , Magneto , Dr. Doom , Rampage , Titanium Man , Crimson Dynamo , the Griffin and Swarm . While serving with the Champions, Hercules started a romantic relationship with the Black Widow , a Champions teammate whom served as the team leader. Their relationship, and Hercules impulsiveness, continued after the Champions disbanded and carried on when they temporarily returned to the Avengers to help their former team fight Korvac . Hercules even served with the Defenders superhero group for a day. A Force to be Reckoned With Hercules - 80's & 90's battle togs Early in the 1980's Hercules' impulsive nature as a roustabout and brawler is first revisited in the Avengers before it's given center stage in two mini-series called "Hercules, Prince of Power." It's also here that his true prowess and proliferation as a ladies' man becomes apparent as he charms, romances and hooks-up with several women including Nova (Frankie Raye), a Herald of Galactus originally from Earth and Layanna Sweetwater. These mini-series are both set in the future and focus on the prospect of Hercules learning true humility. It's here that Hercules is cast as a humorous character for the first time as he's shown as an affable and gregarious hero who's just as likely to goof up as save the day. The success of these mini's gave Hercules a boost in popularity that lead to him rejoining the Avengers in the present. During this stint as an Avenger, Hercules battled foes such as the Beyonder , Terminus , the Skrulls , Maelstrom , Kang , Kang's Growing Man and the Masters of Evil . It's also during this stint as an Avenger that Hercules' use of alcohol was shown and used as a weakness when he was ganged-up on and beaten down by a group of super-strong members of the Masters of Evil after he'd been drugged by Tanya Seely (Black Mamba) while drinking. After recovering from his injuries, Hercules aided the Avengers as a reservist against the High Evolutionary . To defeat the High Evolutionary, Hercules was evolved beyond godhood and temporarily went missing but was eventually found by Thor in the Black Galaxy where the Celestials had used him in an experiment. Thor brought Hercules back to Earth. With the Avengers Hercules with the Avengers Hercules in the 1990's started out much the same as he was in the 1980's; he's the brawling and drinking irreverent roustabout. Upon returning from the Black Galaxy, Hercules partnered with Thor for a time and he once again served as an Avenger facing menaces including; the Collector , Thane Ector , Ares, Kang, Arkon , Terminatrix , Apocryphus and Proctor . Hercules also fought to stop the Kree-Shi'ar War during Operation: Galactic Storm . A new facet of Hercules' persona was shown when he mentored fellow Avenger Eric Masterson , who'd temporarily assumed the identity of Thor, on the use of his powers and the ways of heroism. By the mid-90's, Hercules came into conflict with his father Zeus over his callous disregard for the feelings of others in his cruel machinations and manipulations, specifically the creation and use of the woman/construct Taylor Madison as a tool to be used against Hera. Hercules was emotionally scarred by these events and defiantly stood up to Zeus. Predictably, Zeus reacted with fury and stripped Hercules of his immortality as well as half of his power as punishment for his impudence. This lead to Hercules having to face threats and foes as a mortal again which put him at greater risk of injury and/or death and tempered his usual bluster for a time. Onslaught and Heroes for Hire Hercules during his 'Heroes for Hire' days While stripped of his divinity Hercules continued to fight as an Avenger, but was absent when the team fell, seemingly slain, to Onslaught (he was accompanying his special friend and fellow Avenger, Deathcry , on her journey back to her home world in the Shi'ar Empire ). Hercules' loyalty and dedication to his missing teammates was evident when he decided to return to Olympus and, if necessary, force Zeus to reveal the true fate of the Avengers. To this end he tried to enlist the aid of the Hulk, but the Hulk refused. Hercules didn't accept his refusal and attempted to make the Hulk to help him by force of arms. With Hercules' power significantly diminished, the Hulk beat him nearly to death before Zeus intervened. After recovering from his injuries, Hercules was given the chance to regain his lost divinity and strength, but instead, to Zeus' profound surprise, wanted only to know the fate of the fallen Avengers. Even the power of Zeus proved unable to discern the fate of the Avengers, but Hercules' efforts showed in him a measure of character and selflessness seldom seen before. Hercules even joined S.H.I.E.L.D. briefly serving as an agent to prevent the machinations of Ares and his Warhawks . Still unable to locate his fallen friends, the Avengers, Hercules over-indulged in alcohol attempting to escape his guilt for both not being present when they fell and for not being able to ascertain their fate. During this bout with alcoholism, Hercules joined the newly formed super team " Heroes for Hire " which had been founded, funded and lead by Iron Fist . Unfortunately, his drinking problem lead to reckless behavior which got him kicked off the team shortly after it was formed. The Avengers did survive their battle against Onslaught and eventually returned. Shortly after their return, Hercules aided them as a reservist against Morgan Le Fay and, later, the Exemplars . But tragedy soon struck when long-time Avenger the Scarlet Witch went insane, causing the deaths of several Avengers and the group itself to disband for a period known as "Avengers Disassembled." While the Avengers were disassembled, Hercules' close friend and rival Thor faced the threat of Ragnarok and, along with the entire Asgardian people , was seemingly slain. Post Avengers Disassembled Hercules one-shotting the Abomination In the wake of Avengers Disassembled, Thor's death and his fellow Avengers seeming indifference to and irreverence about the fate of their fallen comrade; a distraught Hercules succumbed to alcoholism. Hercules' step-mother Hera took advantage of the situation by trying to thoroughly humiliate him and destroy his heroic reputation while he was in this vulnerable state. To accomplish this she enlisted the aid of Hercules' cousin and ancient rival Eurysteus, recalling him from the underworld to set up a modern twelve labors for Hercules to perform on a reality television show. These labors were designed to be as impossible as the original twelve Hercules performed in ancient times. They included capturing Ka-Zar's sabretooth tiger partner Zabu , the Inhuman watch-dog Lockjaw , snaring Dragon Man, defeating the Abomination , Acquiring Captain America's shield , retrieving a S.H.I.E.L.D helicarrier and facing his dead wife Megara in Hades to obtain her forgiveness. Hera was certain Hercules would fail, but he completed these new labors, thus restoring his public reputation and renewing his lust for life. Also happening during this period of his life, despite being represented by the She-Hulk , who specialized in cases involving super humans, Hercules was successfully sued by the super-villain Constrictor for for damages due to injuries the villain incurred when Hercules stopped him during the active commission of a crime; beating him up in the process. Hercules lost all his money paying this fine and subsequently had to work as a laborer for Damage Control to make a living. Hercules' financial troubles were short-lived, however, as he won back nearly all of his fortune a short time later by beating the Constrictor in a poker tournament held by Benjamin J. Grimm, a.k.a. the Thing . Civil War When the super team known as the New Warriors tried to apprehend some fugitive super villains, while filming their efforts for a potential reality television show, one of those villains, Nitro , exploded while battling New Warrior Namorita and caused a bus to explode killing hundreds of school children. In the wake of this tragedy the public outcry against super-powered people was immense leading to the United States government passing a law requiring all super-powered citizens to make their identities and powers known to the government. The law also required them to train and use their abilities in the service and at the direction of the U.S. federal government. The law was called the Super-Human Registration Act . Many heroes complied and registered, but many heroes did not. Most prominent amongst those who chose not to register was Captain America . The government could not abide people who were required to register not doing so and they soon ordered the newly registered super-humans to arrest the now-fugitive non-compliant super-humans, often pitting friends against friends. This lead to the the Superhero Civil War which pitted former friends and allies against each other and even put super villains who had registered on the right side of the law when they confronted and battled their respective heroic foes. Hercules puttin' the smackdown on Ragnarok During the Civil War, Hercules became a part of Secret Avengers, joining Captain America and fighting in opposition of the Super-Human Registration Act. Captain America's forces were largely street-level heroes so the addition of Hercules brought a lot of much needed power to their side. Hercules proved invaluable to Cap's team at least twice. The first time was when Cap's team was lured into a false rescue situation set up by Iron Man, who lead the registered super-human forces. The Secret Avengers responded to the false emergency only to find themselves outnumbered by Iron Man and his team. Cap and Iron Man spoke briefly before a full-blown battle erupted. For a time Cap's side held their own, but things started to go bad when Captain America was on the verge of being beaten by Iron Man. Seeing Cap's desperate situation, Hercules fought his way through several super-strong opponents and was attempting to rescue Captain America when Ragnarok (a cybernetic clone of Thor) brutally attacked, striking Hercules down with massive amounts of lightning. The battle continued and Ragnarok soon killed Goliath (Bill Foster ). This brutal killing shocked everyone present, temporarily stopping the battle and even swaying some heroes to change sides. With the battle on hold, Hercules used to opportunity to strike Iron Man with a fuel tanker-truck and rescue the badly beaten Captain America. The non-registered heroes then made their escape with the unexpected help of the Invisible Woman who was appalled by the actions and very existence of Ragnarok. Hercules' second key moment of the Civil War came during the final battle when he finally got his chance to face Ragnarok, who was arguably the pro-registration side's most powerful and dangerous weapon, one on one without first being struck unexpectedly. Hercules and Ragnarok battled fiercely, but Hercules eventually got the upper hand and even used Ragnarok's own hammer to strike the final blow; breaking open the clone's head and incapacitating him. It was also during this final battle that Captain America once again fought Iron Man. This time Cap was on the verge of defeating Iron Man when several average citizens intervened on Iron Man's behalf. Having the common man take Iron Man's side and seeing the collateral damage the final battle had wrought caused Cap to have a change of heart. He surrendered and ended the Civil War. Hercules, however, still did not register and remained a fugitive. In World War Hulk, Hercules was recruited by Amadeus Cho , the seventh smartest person in the world, to join his group of Renegades for the purpose of trying to help the Hulk. Secret Invasion Hercules battling Ikaris After Hercules convinced Amadeus Cho that taking SHIELD down was wrong, they went to Hercules' sister Athena's house in Vermont to lay low for a while. Athena advised Hercules to look over Cho as he was at crossroads and could one day become an effective hero or an unstoppable villain. Athena, Cho and Hercules then went to San Francisco for a meeting of the Council of Godheads in the shadow of the Dreaming Celestial. While driving across the country from Vermont to San Francisco, Athena used the time to get acquainted with Cho. She told him some of the Olympian Gods' history, gave him some background info about Hercules and insight into what he's capable of. Hercules saw the road-trip as an occasion to party, most notably in Cleveland where he battled the gigantic Celtic demigod; Bran , the Blessed and romanced the She-Hulk. Hercules, Cho and Athena eventually arrived in San Francisco where they encountered the Ikaris and Thena , two Eternals who were working for the Dreaming Celestial . The two Eternals mistook Hercules for the Eternal known as Gilgamesh , the Forgotten One (Gilgamesh had actually performed one of Hercules' twelve labors; the cleaning of the Augean stables) and tried to convince Hercules he was Gilgamesh. It turned out that the Eternal Makkari had made an error in translating the Celestial's message, the Celestials were expecting forgotten ones but did not mean Hercules was actually the "Forgotten One." Thena, still not sure whom they were referring to, asked Athena. Athena merelynreplied "Wouldn't you like to know?". When the Eternals had departed Athena called a meeting of the Council of Godheads to discuss a grave threat to earth; the Skrull's secret invasion. She then advised the Council to send their own invasion force to attack and slay the Skrull pantheon of gods in their own realm, thus preventing them from commanding the Skrulls to conquer Earth. Athena suggested Hercules, accompanied by Amadeus Cho, lead the Council's invading force of divine representatives consisting of Snowbird , Tecumotzin (actually the Eternal Ajak ), Amatsu-Mikaboshi , and Atum the God Eater. Hercules was reluctant to lead the newly formed and aptly named God Squad because he lacked confidence in his leadership abilities, but he finally accepted the role of leader when the African God Anasi inadvertently challenged his pride by stating Thor of Asgard (a longtime friend and rival of Hercules) would be a far more suitable leader. Hercules decision was sealed when he stated "If you follow, I will lead!" and the group responded by joining him in the " God Squad." The new group then boarded their ship and embarked on their journey to the realm of the Skrull gods. The God Squad - 1st Line-up Early in their journey through the dreamtime the God Squad battled Nightmare and acquired his map of the dreamtime. Now having the means to mount an assault on the Skrull gods, the team resumed their quest while Hercules connected with Snowbird romantically along the way. Cho's pup, discovered to be a Skrull spy, was consumed by Demogorge as the Squad arrived at the edge of the Skrull god's realm where they were immediately attacked by hoards of alien gods enthralled by the Skrull deities. During the ensuing battle they lost Snowbird. Upon their arrival at the throne of Kly'bn and Sl'Gur't, Ajak openly rebelled against Hercules placing the blame for the loss of their companion firmly on his shoulders and doubting his ability to lead them to victory. Hercules allowed Ajak to assume command and battle Kly'bn. Ajak's power proved insufficient against Kly'bn and he was seemingly slain. Meanwhile, Atum, in his Demogorge form, battled and then swallowed Sl'Gur't whole but was quickly ripped apart from within when he was unable to absorb the power she contained. Parts of Atum's body exploded in all directions with one of his bones knocking Cho into the endless void of the Dreamtime. Enraged by the loss of Cho (which was the boy genius' plan), Hercules cut loose and battled the Skrull god-head to a stand still (impressive since Kly'bn was the god-head and most powerful of the entire Skrull Pantheon, ruling over them and all their captured Pantheons). While they battled, Kly'bn tried and failed to convert Hercules to his cause. And although they were evenly matched, Hercules eventually gained the advantage and hurled Kly'bn onto Demogorge's spinal column (which was held by Snowbird, who'd returned and rescued Cho from the void), slaying him. A battle of shape-shifters simultaneously raged between Amatsu-Mikaboshi and Sl'Gur't. And although Atum met his end at her hands, Mikaboshi was able to defeat her. By defeating and slaying the Skrull's inspirational godhead and his mate, the Squad had broken the back-bone of their spirituality-motivated invasion. Only then did the surviving members of the God Squad (Hercules, Snowbird and Cho) return home. Love and War Hercules - Matching strength against Atlas In need of some rest and relaxation after defeating the Skrull deity Kly'Bn, Hercules, who had invited Namora and Amadeus Cho, took a vacation on a remote island where Hercules and Namora were able to privately romp. Unfortunately for the trio it wasn't long before they were attacked by a group of Amazons wielding modern military weapons. The Amazons managed to capture Cho whom they needed to locate the Omphalos, an ancient Olympian artifact of immense power which can be used to alter reality, which they intended to use to become the world's dominant force. Namor , the Sub-Mariner, joined the group and informed them of the capture of the Olympian sea god, patron deity of Atlantis and uncle of Hercules; Neptune . The group found and rescued Neptune after which Namor took him back to Atlantis for medical treatment and care. Hercules and Namora then headed to the new Axis Mundi (the seat of earthly world power), in Washington D.C., to intercept and engage the Amazons. Once there they met up with Athena, rescued Cho and battled the Olympian Titan Atlas . Despite all their efforts, the Amazon leader Artume , the daughter of Hippolyta, now in possession of the Omphalos succeeded in using it to reshape the world into the Amazon-dominated one she envisioned. A world she then ruled, a world where Hercules was the sole remaining rebel to stand against her empire and defy her rule. Meanwhile, Hera and Pluto had taken over the Olympus Group/ Olympus Corporation , the modern day seat of power for the Olympian Gods, via the inherited shares of Zeus' and by the buying out of (through deception) Neptune, and had decided to use the company, it's influence and their own godly might toward a new major goal: the deaths of Athena and Hercules. Hercules, Amadeus, Athena and others were able to slay Artume and end the Amazon threat. In the course of these events, Hercules iwa shocked to discover Namora's fondest desire was for Namor to be her love. Hercules and Amadeus reunited and continued their travels after Athena used what remained of the Axis Mundi energies to undo the damage inflicted by Artume and restore reality. Dark Reign After helping defeat Chthon as members of the Mighty Avengers, Hercules and Amadeus met with Athena at Silly's Greek Diner where they are confronted by Hera and the monstrous Titan Typhon (whom she held in thrall). Hercules and Typhon nearly came to blows, but Silly's Greek Diner had been declared sanctuary for all Olympians, thus forbidding any violence between Gods while inside. Hera demanded that Athena recognize her as ruler of the Olympians and submit to her authority or, along with Hercules and Amadeus, be killed. When Athena refused, Hera told her the next time they met she'd kill her. She also hinted she'd already disposed of Athena's mortal champion; the New Warrior Aegis. Hercules fighting dirty against the Sentry Hercules, Amadeus and Athena's search for Aegis lead them to a warehouse where they found Aegis' dead body. Hera and her allies Typhon, Pluto, the Huntsman of Zeus and Delphyne Gorgon were waiting in the warehouse intent on ambushing Hercules and company but, before they could launch their assault, Norman Osborn's Avengers (most of whom were actually villains) arrived and attacked both sides. Hercules engaged the Sentry and Spider-Man ( Venom ) simultaneously for an extended period, holding his own throughout the battle, while Amadeus and Delphyne aided each other against Ms. Marvel ( Moonstone ) and Hawkeye ( Bullseye ). After a time Amadeus convinced Hercules they would eventually lose and they should quit the fight. Hercules then provided a very public emergency requiring the Avengers response to maintain Osborn's heroic charade. The Avengers responded to the emergency while Hercules and his crew escaped. Athena then prepared Hercules and Amadeus to enter Hades, while Pluto was absent, to rescue the only one powerful enough to stop Hera: Zeus. Hercules and Amadeus entered Hades through a casino in Atlantic City where they saw many fallen heroes including Aegis, who acted as their guide in the underworld. Amadeus used his genius to win enough money to pay for passage into Tartarus where Zeus was imprisoned. Once in Tartarus, they found Zeus shackled and held by Pluto, Lord of Hades. Next, they are attacked by twelve deceased villains including the one responsible for Hercules' mortal demise; Nessus. Hercules fought the villains, eventually holding them off using the Hydra-poisoned blood of Nessus. As Hercules battled, Pluto stated Zeus would be tried for his crimes and offered to let Hercules leave the underworld with his step-father Amphitryon instead. Hercules was actually convinced to refuse this offer by Amphitryon and instead chose to attend the trial. Hercules in turn convinced Amadeus to take advantage of the opportunity to see his deceased family while in the underworld. The trial began with Pluto blaming all manner of misfortune and atrocity on Zeus. Witnesses called during this trial included: Cronus (father of Zeus), Semele (former lover of Zeus), Typhon, Hercules and Zeus himself. The result of the trial was a guilty verdict for Zeus, whom was then sentenced to drink from the River Lethe and thus, lose his memory. The mortal 'shade' of Hercules Ignoring Zeus' wishes, Hercules refused to recognize the court and rejected both their verdict and Pluto's sentence. Pluto's response was to bring forth Hercules' own mortal shade which, upon his mortal demise, had been relegated to Hades while Hercules was raised up to full-godhood. Hercules battled his mortal shade as Zeus and Pluto watched. Meanwhile, Amadeus found his parents and learned his sister hadn't died. While watching Hercules battle on his behalf, Zeus was so moved by Hercules' devotion to him that he willingly drank from the River Lethe and was instantly transformed into a mass of glowing energy. Hercules saw this, immediately dispatched his mortal shade and pursued the energy-mass until they both emerged from the casino in Atlantic City where Athena waited. The energy-mass then struck the ground and became Zeus, bereft of his memory in the form of a boy. Amadeus then emerged from the casino and, angry that Athena hadn't told him his sister yet lived, refused to accompany Hercules anymore, deciding to go his own way instead. The Mighty Thorcules When the new trio (Hercules, Athena & Zeus) left Atlantic City Hercules explained to Zeus (now a child with no memory) who he was and how he came to be in his current condition. They are then attacked by harpies sent by Hera. Athena separated from the group to fight them while Hercules escaped with Zeus. Hercules and Zeus soon encountered Balder the Brave, then the Lord of Asgard, who was fleeing from some dark elves and a troll. Hercules and Zeus acted on Balder's behalf, swiftly dealing with his pursuers. Balder explained that Alflyse, Queen of the Dark Elves of Svartalfheim, was planning to take advantage of Thor's exile from Asgard by conquering it. With Asgard weakened by the loss of Thor and in need of an equally mighty champion, Balder sought out Hercules to enlist his aid against Alflyse and the Dark Elves. Thorcules: Hercules posing as Thor Hercules was reluctant to help at first because he didn't want to put the boy Zeus, in danger but was quickly swayed when shown the comely Queen's image. Balder further explained the Dark Elves must believe that Thor still served Balder and defended Asgard. To this end, Norn magic was used to disguise Hercules as Thor and his Adamantine mace as Thor's hammer Mjolnir. They then traveled to Washington, D.C. to use the Axis Mundi to access a portal to Svartalfheim. Balder stayed behind while Hercules and Zeus found the portal and entered Svartalfheim. Once they were gone, Balder revealed his true identity; Malekith the Accursed, former leader of the Dark Elves. Upon entering Svartalfheim, Hercules and Zeus were immediately surrounded by a troll war party with whom they made an uneasy alliance against their common foe, Queen Alflyse. The alliance was brief, however, as the trolls betrayed and attacked them as soon as Alflyse's castle came into view. Hercules had no sooner defeated the trolls when he and Zeus were met by a contingent of Dark Elves which included Queen Alflyse herself. Hercules introduced himself as "Thor" and Zeus as his son, "Moodi the Moody." Zeus asked Alflyse if she planned to conquer Midgard. She told him that under her rule the Dark Elves had renounced the aggressive foreign policy of her predecessor, Malekith. Using his typical charm, Hercules complimented Alflyse on her eloquence and her beauty. Alflyse liked what she heard but expressed a need for proof that what he said was true. Alflyse told Hercules that she had heard Thor was banished from Asgard and his hammer was broken. Turning on the charm, Hercules responded "I am Thor. And I assure you, my . . . hammer works just fine." Alflyse smiled and blushed, but still she required him to prove he was indeed Thor by performing a series of challenges. Romance between Hercules and Queen Alflyse The first challenge began immediately when a giant forge dropped on the unsuspecting Hercules momentarily pushing him to the ground. He sprung up instantly and smashed the forge to pieces, much to Alflyse's obvious pleasure. The next challenge was a trial of wits. Hercules had to solve the most legendary endgame in three-storied elvish chess. He pondered the board and it's levels for a time and then, concluding he couldn't solve it, he "accidentally" knocked the entire board over. He then claimed victory through changing the rules to win the unwinnable. Though her advisor was unconvinced, Alflyse eagerly accepted Hercules' reasoning and called for the next challenge. The third challenge was test of character in which Hercules was surrounded and engaged by several Elven warriors. After the battle began, Alflyse pulled her dress up high to reveal her upper leg and inner thigh. Despite being in the midst of battle, Hercules couldn't resist looking at her sensual display and was struck soundly upon the head while distracted. Hercules admitted failure in this challenge, but Alflyse (who'd obviously wanted him to succeed) declared, "Two out of three. Close enough." So the challenges ended with Hercules successfully proving he was "Thor" and they celebrated into the night. Hercules and Alflyse celebrated together; getting better acquainted and spending the night together. Zeus, however, used the time to research and study the real Thor in the Elven library. The next morning Hercules woke up feeling quite proud of his "diplomacy" but was shocked to learn he was now married to Alflyse. It was then that she told him of her new plans to conquer first Midgard (Earth) and then Asgard to reclaim Thor's birthright, the Crown of Asgard, for him. She proclaimed this as she presented to Hercules her Dark Elf forces, assembled and ready to march. The Elven invasion of Midgard was about to begin when they were confronted by the real Thor, disguised as Hercules to avoid accusations of deception, and the Warriors Three. Seeking to stop the invasion, Thor ordered Alflyse to disperse her forces. She questioned what right an Olympian had to intervene and the Warriors Three told her their old ally "Hercules" (actually Thor) was now defending Asgard and "Thor" (actually Hercules) could claim his birthright by defeating Asgard's new defender. They even offered a written compact to bind both sides to the deal. Queen Alflyse happily accepted the terms as she was quite certain her husband "Thor" would defeat "Hercules." Hercules and Thor switch roles and fight Before they battled, Hercules and Thor met and discussed the circumstances leading up to the predicament in which they found themselves. Hercules told Thor he was impersonating him at Balder's request. Thor had no knowledge of that, but reminded Hercules that in order to halt the invasion he, as "Thor" must lose their battle. Thor assured Hercules he wouldn't hurt him while telling him to make their "fight" convincing. Hercules, incited by Thor's words, struck first and the battle began. The two gods traded real blows, renewing their ancient rivalry for a time before Thor told Hercules to go down. Hercules told Thor that since the Dark Elves had seen what he could do, nothing Thor had yet done would convince them he'd honestly lost. He proceeded to bait Thor, telling him "You're Hercules now. Live up to the name." Sufficiently goaded by Hercules, Thor struck decisively, giving Hercules the opportunity to concede defeat, which he did, stating; "Mighty Thor has finally, definitively and completely been defeated by Hercules, the Lion of Olympus." Thor rolled his eyes and grunted. The battle was over. The matter of the elven invasion now settled, Hercules and Thor relaxed and shared some mead while recovering from their battle. Suddenly, Malekith and his ally Grendell attacked, catching Hercules and Thor unprepared. Before anyone else could react, Zeus struck Grendell down with a mighty thunderbolt revealing his identity to all present including Alflyse. The truth now out, Alflyse chastised Hercules for deceiving her but admitted she was quite flattered by his desire for her and even more impressed by his ability to please her. The two of them joined hands and left together, returning to the castle for more private time, leaving the boy Zeus with Thor and the Warriors Three as a new celebration ensued, carrying on into the night. Assault on New Olympus The unlikely team of Hercules & Spider-Man While Hercules and the youthful Zeus were side-tracked to Svartalfheim, Athena began gathering allies with which to oust Hera from power. First she brought Amadeus Cho back to her side and then she tried, but failed, to recruit Aphrodite, the Olympian Goddess of Love, to her cause. Athena also informed Cho that she had similarly failed to recruit Apollo, Artemis and Dionysus as well. They decide to then contact Avengers Mansion where Hercules and Zeus have just arrived upon their return from Svartalfheim. Athena brought Hercules up to speed on what had occurred during his absence, informing him of Hera's plans and telling him his wife, Hebe - Olympian Goddess of Youth - had been cast out of New Olympus for betraying Hera. Hercules summoned all available Avengers and told them of the grave danger Hera's "Continuum" presented to Earth. Before the Avengers, Athena and Zeus could decide or do anything to thwart Hera's machinations, Hercules decided to find his absent wife Hebe. Find her he did; kissing Peter Parker (Spider-Man). Consumed by jealousy from this sight; Hercules struck Parker and knocked him flying through the air and out of the building into an alley. Now out of public view, Parker used the opportunity to quickly change into Spider-Man. Hercules soon arrived in the alley where the two of them began to fight. Spider-Man did what he could but he was sorely out-classed. Their skirmish ended when Hercules buried Spider-Man beneath a multitude of cars weighing many tons and Hebe interceded before he could act further. Hercules and Hebe then made amends and she joined the forces aligned against Hera. Now back at Avengers Mansion, Hercules and his allies used Hebe's inside knowledge of Hera's plans to devise a strategy to stop Hera before she could roll-out her master plan - Continuum. The group managed to sneak through Hera's defenses, infiltrating the Olympus Group's corporate/godly headquarters. The heroes were soon discovered, however, and the battle was joined when amazons, monsters, gods and goddesses attacked the heroes. Henry Pym fought Argus, the one-hundred eyed cyclops and Spider-Woman engaged the demon Lamia. USAgent battled Eris, Goddess of Discord, Wolverine battled against Cephalus, Huntsman of Olympus and Spider-Man fought the Olympian spider-goddess, Arachne. Cho found his love, Dephyne Gorgon, and tied to reason with her while Athena engaged Hera herself in battle. This left Hercules to contend with the mightiest and most dangerous of Hera's forces; the monstrous Typhon. The battle went badly for Hercules' side as Zeus was captured and all but Hercules and Cho were defeated. Hercules leading the Avengers against New Olympus Zeus was taken by Hera and Typhon into their innermost stronghold where Hera finally revealed "Continuum" to be an empty artificial universe made real by her godly power and nature. She explained that rolling out Continuum would destroy the universe while simultaneously replacing it, killing everything and everyone but Hera and her followers. Outside Hera's stronghold, Hercules and Cho tried to gain entry as they squabbled about who would save which of their fallen allies. Finally deciding to act together in breaching the stronghold, Hercules and Cho were captured by Hephaestus as they attempted to dig their way in from underground. They quickly escaped the Fire God's traps, however. Meanwhile, Continuum began it's roll-out and started to assert itself in this reality as Zeus used his new appearance and fresh start in life to try and sway Hera from her plans with promises of a fresh start for their love as well. Hera's cold, hard-heart was warmed and softened by Zeus' words. Hera then, having heard what she'd always wanted to hear and having been promised what she wanted most, a faithful Zeus, ordered Typhon to stop the roll-out of Continuum. Typhon refused, calmly explaining he'd been born to destroy the Gods and it was his intent to do exactly that. Hera attempted to assert her control over Typhon but couldn't. No longer able to control Typhon, Hera attacked him with Zeus joining her in the attack. The attack, though fearsome, was to no avail for Typhon wore the Aegis of Zeus and was thus immune to all physical harm. Typhon then quickly slew Hera while purposely leaving Zeus alive so he could explain his hatred for him and their ancient enmity towards each other to the memory deprived Zeus. Once he'd finished telling Zeus these things, he slew him as well. Though they weren't present at the time of Zeus' demise, Hercules and Cho became aware of it instantly when Athena, who'd been turned to stone previously, was struck and re-animated by the Thunderbolt of Zeus as she inherited it upon his death. Immediately following Athena's re-animation and inheritance, she, Hercules and Cho witnessed Thanatos, the Olympian death-god, guiding the shades/souls of Zeus and Hera on their journey to the underworld. Enraged by the day's events, Hercules was desperate to get to and stop Typhon while Cho was happy because Hercules, who was apparently supposed to die, now seemed safe. Athena and Cho then went to the aid of the defeated Avengers while Hercules, now able to gain access to the stronghold, went to confront Typon and stop Continuum. The epic final battle of Hercules and Typhon Upon entering the Olympus' Group's stronghold, Hercules was saddened when he found his father's corpse. He had little time for grief, though, as Typon quickly appeared and the battle was joined. Hercules and Typhon fought savagely, raining blow after blow and strike after strike of incalculable force upon each other. The battle-tide shifted back and forth between the two behemoths, but Hercules finally gained the upper-hand. Preparing to deliver the killing blow, Hercules mustered all of his godly-strength, raised his Adamantine mace and used it to strike the all-but-defeated Typhon. Shockingly, Typhon was unharmed. It was Hercules who was struck by the force of his blow, severely injuring him. It was then that Typhon revealed he was wearing the Aegis to Hercules. Then it was Typhon who positioned himself to finish-off Hercules. Before killing Hercules, however, the sadistic Typhon amused himself by using Hercules' mace to beat, break and cripple him. Finally tiring of beating the helpless Hercules, Typhon asked Hercules for any last words before he died. The thoroughly beaten and broken Hercules, now mumbling and slurring, drew Typhon close to hear his last words. When Typhon was close enough, Hercules pulled out a vile of water Cho had obtained from the River Lethe and put it in the monster's mouth. The water instantly took Typhon's memory causing him to no longer recognize Hercules. Confused, Typhon asked Hercules who he was. Hercules merely requested that the Titan end his pain and suffering. Typhon didn't know why, but he found pleasure in the thought of killing Hercules and so he agreed. He moved in to kill Hercules but left himself vulnerable and was instead killed by Hercules who used his unbroken arm and Adamantine mace to beat Typhon to death. With Typon now dead, all that remained was for Hercules to shut down the machine rolling-out Continuum. As beaten, broken and injured as he was Hercules found himself struggling mightily at any attempt to move. Effectively crippled, Hercules was still trying to get to the machine when Athena appeared. Hercules rejoiced at the appearance of his beloved sister but was dismayed when she told him her plan for the future included him dying so Cho could replace him as the new 'Prince of Power.' To save the universe; Athena then destroyed the Continuum machine, sealing the new Continuum-universe off from this one, but seemingly killed Hercules by doing so. When Cho and the Avengers made their way to her, Athena told them that Hercules had been vaporized while saving the world by smashing the Continuum machine. The New Prince of Power Heroes & Friends gather to mourn Hercules The day after his apparent death, there was a funeral service for Hercules at the Parthenon in Greece. Many Greek citizens attended, paying their respects to their ancient hero. The most notable attendees, however, were many of the heroes Hercules had befriended. Counted among these heroes were Amadeus Cho, Thor, The Warriors Three of Asgard, Namor , Bruce Banner, the Black Widow, Namora, Snowbird, Wolverine and several others. Many of these attending heroes eulogized Hercules by recounting stories times they had shared with Hercules. They described heroic adventures, personal insights and bedroom prowess. The last word went to Hercules' genius side-kick, young Amadeus Cho. Cho had barely spoken when Athena and the rest of the remaining major Olympian gods and goddesses suddenly appeared. Athena then informed Cho, and all present, that he was to be the new leader of the Olympus Group (under her guidance, of course). Cho started to speak, protesting Athena's edict, when Apollo , Olympian God of Light, objected as well. Surprised by Apollo's objection, Athena tried to bait him into battle but, after a brief display of his godly power, Apollo instead challenged Athena to a battle of proxies. Athena accepted and promptly selected Cho to be her champion. Apollo responded by choosing Phobos , God of Fear and son of the late Ares. The other attending gods then made their selections with Poseidon choosing Namor for Athena's side and Artemis picking Skaar , son of the Hulk for her twin brother Apollo's side. Next, Nyx, Olympian Goddess of the Night, selected Nightmare for Apollo while Hebe, Olympian Goddess of Youth and widow of Hercules, chose Bruce Banner to aid Cho. With the sides now chosen the battle commenced. Cho quickly gained the upper hand in his confrontation with Phobos and then, to the surprise of the Olympian gods, managed to unite both teams of proxies against them. The ensuing battle of mortal proxies against the gods who'd selected them lead to Cho gaining access to the Olympian underworld through Pluto, God of the Underworld. Cho went to the underworld seeking Hercules but was soon informed by Pluto's wife, Persephone (Queen of the Underworld) that Hercules was not there. Realizing that Hercules' underworld absence meant he still lived, Cho resolved to find him. He accepted the Olympus Group leadership position from Athena so he could use all of it's earthly wealth and godly power to find Hercules. The first thing Cho did as leader of the Olympus Group was hire Bruce Banner to help him invent and build a device called the 'Hercollider Synchrotron.' This device was designed and built to search the entire multiverse for Hercules at hyper-speed. Unfortunately, Cho soon learned that even at it's inconceivable rate of speed, it could still take roughly a billion-and-half years for the device to search the multiverse and find Hercules. Cho was pondering a new way to locate Hercules when he was approached by Vali Halfling (a.k.a. Agamemnon) , son of Loki and former leader of the "Pantheon." Vali told Cho that he had figured out how to attain full, all-powerful, undeniable godhood. He explained this was possible by combining Olympian Ambrosia, the Asgardian Apples of Idunn , Spells from the Book of Thoth and the sacred Moon-cup of Dhanvantari . Vali also proposed that Cho join him to obtain these things and attain this higher level of being. Cho refused Vali's offer, deciding to get these objects by himself so he could use the power they would grant to find Hercules and bring him back. Cho's quest to obtain these mythological artifacts became a race when Vali sought to get them first. While trying to secure the Apples of Idunn in Asgard, Cho found he'd arrived too late; Vali had already been there and had got them first. Before he could leave, however, Cho was confronted by and forced to battle Thor. Cho was soon defeated by Thor, but managed to convince the God of Thunder to let him go and even aid him in attempting to get the Spells from the Book of Thoth. Unfortunately, Vali was got every ingredient except the Moon-cup of Dhanvantari first. While trying to get the Moon-cup first, Cho was defeated in battle with Vali. Seeking to get the Moon-cup while Cho was down, Vali left the objects he'd previously gathered unsecured in Cho's presence as he hastily tried to get the final ingredient. On his way to the Moon-cup, Vali was delayed by an attack from Delphyne Gorgon. This allowed Cho to get it first. He quickly combined the four ingredients and used them to attain the level of full, all-powerful and undeniable godhood. Sky-Father Hercules: The god of gods Ironically, Cho's new found power included omniscience which quickly made clear to him that he was not the proper receptacle of this newly acquired, awesome power. Realizing this, Cho determined Hercules was the proper person to have and wield this inconceivable level of power. He then used the power to locate Hercules in the 'Continuum' universe and bring him forth. With Hercules now there, Cho transferred all of his newly acquired power to him making and calling Hercules the "God of Gods." Their reunion was short-lived, though, as Hercules instantly sensed the grave and imminent threat of the Chaos King and immediately left to begin gathering heroes to meet this danger. Chaos War Sky-Father Hercules vs Chaos King Mikaboshi Shortly after acquiring his immense new powers, Hercules became aware, due to his omniscience, of Amatsu-Mikaboshi's continued existence as the Chaos King, his acquisition of power and his plan to return the entirety of existence to the state of nothingness from which it originated. Realizing the grave danger he presented, Hercules used his new-found omnipotence to gather and further empower Earth's superheroes to fight the Chaos King/Mikaboshi and his army of enslaved alien deities. Unfortunately when Hercules and his heroic forces launched their assault, the Chaos King used the power he'd acquired from Nightmare, Lord of the Dream Dimension, to put humanity into a trance-like state leaving only Hercules, Thor and Amadeus Cho to oppose him. The Chaos King also attacked all of the various aspects of the underworld/Hell and forced Death herself to flee causing the mass release of all the souls of the deceased back into the realm of the living while also keeping those who were dying, or normally should/would die, alive. Hercules then used his power to recruit to his cause several other very powerful non-mortal beings who'd also proven immune to the Chaos King's trance. These beings included the Eternal; Sersi, half-demon; Hellstorm, former sea nymph; Venus and even the Devourer of Worlds; Galactus (though, in this case, unwillingly) and his herald; the Silver Surfer. These beings joined Hercules, Thor and Cho in forming the second incarnation of the God Squad to stop the Chaos King and save the multiverse. Hercules - finishing the Chaos King It was soon revealed that Hercules' sister, Athena, was the Chaos King's accomplice which she became after deciding the current reality is irreparably metaphysically corrupt and wished to start fresh with a new universe, a new reality, after the Chaos King had finished destroying the current one. Amadeus, by then, was losing hope of stopping the spread of chaos and the end of all things but theorized that reality could be saved if it were transported to the "Continuum" universe Hera had created. Hercules was against the idea and argued they should go down fighting. Hercules was then confronted by Athena who, acting as an agent of the Chaos King, intended to kill him. Unknown to Athena, Herucles' already immense power had been even further increased by Gaea and Pele who had destroyed and recreated Hercules as a maintainer of the cycle of life. Now more powerful than ever, Hercules casually annihilated his attacking sibling. Hercules, now more powerful than ever, then used his awesome power to confront and fight the Chaos King in an epic battle of universal proportions. Hercules was wounded during the battle but was able to hurt the Chaos King in kind. Eventually, with some help of the Hulk Squad, the Dead Avengers and even the X-Men ; Hercules, Amadeus Cho and Galactus managed to trick the Chaos King into entering the Continuum universe which they then sealed off forever. Hercules, despite a warning from the now normal Athena, then used his awesome godly powers to repair the damage the Chaos King had caused and restore reality to it's rightful form. The effort this feat required expended not only all of his "God of Gods" powers, it also spent all of his usual godly might as well, leaving him completely without superhuman powers making him, for the first time in his more than 3,000 years of life, a mortal human. Herc De-powered, Herc relies on Olympian weapons Despite being de-powered after defeating the Chaos King and winning the Chaos War, Hercules remained true to his character and was determined to be a what he had always been; a hero. Powerless but now armed with Ares' cache of mystical weapons, he came to Brooklyn and met a man who owns a Greek bar. Earning a job as a bouncer and a place to stay, he put the entire borough under his protection from two warring factions the Warhawks lead by Kyknos the son of Ares and the Kingpin , Wilson Fisk. Herc then confronted a group of inmates who escaped from the Raft after the events of Fear Itself only to discover the re-emergence of Hecate the Mistress of Terror and Witchcraft which only complicated things more as the populous was overwhelmed with rage and Herc was caught in the middle. Realizing that being mortal puts him in a disadvantage, Hercules hardened his resolve and pressed on but was surprised when he noticed the entire city had been engulfed by a thick forest. Powers Superhuman Strength The superhuman strength of Hercules Hercules is the Olympian God of Strength and as such his principal power is incredibly vast superhuman strength . The Lion of Olympus is the strongest Olympian God as well as one of the strongest beings in the Marvel Universe (Earth-616). Hercules' strength is extremely far beyond the "Superhuman: Class 100" level and enables him to lift far, far over 100 tons with absolute ease. He has demonstrated his legendary strength many times over in the performance of several highly impressive, nigh-impossible, heroic deeds and feats of strength. These feats include: lifting and tossing Marvel's 60,000 ton version of Godzilla , holding Manhattan Island together using gigantic steel chains, supporting Greenwich Village over his head for an extended period of time, lifting and hurling a giant Sequoia tree, lifting and carrying a starship, drop-kicking a bulldozer, stopping cold a power-punch from the Sentry in the palm of his hand and forcing the Thing to submit in a wrestling match. He has also overpowered the likes of Wonder Man and Abomination. It was during ancient times (while performing his eleventh labor), however, that Hercules accomplished what is perhaps his greatest and most impressive strength-feat when he took the weight of the heavens from the Titan Atlas and held it overhead for three straight hours before tricking Atlas into resuming the burden. This is arguably one the strongest strength feats in all of comics since the weight of "the heavens" is considered immeasurable and incalculable. Time and again the strength of Hercules has proven to be completely beyond measure - having no known limits - and at the very least rivals that of the mighty Thor (In one fight Thor was unable to break Hercules' grip because of his superior strength). The superhuman strength of Hercules is prevalent throughout his entire body, including his lower body. His highly developed leg muscles enable him to make a standing vertical leap of at least 100 feet in Earth's gravity. Hercules has cleanly severed, at the base of the trunk, an extremely large, full-grown tree with a single kick and and has effortlessly kicked over an entire tractor-trailer fully loaded with freshly cut logs. Controversy over Pulling Manhattan Island Hercules - towing Manhattan Island. An incident during the 1970s, in the series Marvel Team-Up, created some controversy among fans of the character. In issue #28 Hercules is shown pulling the entire island of Manhattan back into place after it has been offset. Due to complaints both from fans and staff, the feat was later retconned out of existence. Although this feat is not inconsistent with Hercules' strength based feats, it was nonetheless argued to be logically impossible as such a feat would rupture and destroy city infrastructure among other reasons. To some degree the debate over this remains to this day but, as the company itself retconned the depiction to have not existed, this is the official standpoint. Equally, Hercules is shown in myth and elsewhere as having lifted more than this weight (even bearing the entire weight of the Earth in ancient myth). Superhuman Durability Hercules - Withstanding multiple missile strikes uninjured Hercules is super-humanly durable/practically invulnerable making him extremely resistant to nearly all forms of blunt force, penetration and energy assaults. His extremely high level of durability/invulnerability is a product of being born a demigod son of Zeus, being suckled by Hera as an infant and finally, upon his mortal death, being made a full-fledged immortal god by his father Zeus. Due to these factors he has greater resistance to physical injury/harm than any other Olympian god except his father Zeus, and possibly his uncles Neptune and Pluto. Hercules is able to withstand the impact of high caliber machine gun shells, direct hits from S.H.I.E.L.D anti-aircraft missiles, falls from incredible heights, exposure to extreme temperatures and the vacuum of space without sustaining injury or being harmed in any way. Hercules has withstood powerful cosmic energy blasts from Nova (Frankie Raye) , a Herald of Galactus, without sustaining injury, and was able to survive two blank-point blasts from the man-god Michael Korvac . Hercules has fought many of the strongest heroes and villains in the Marvel Universe, withstanding repeated punches from the Hulk (while highly enraged) and numerous blows from Thor's enchanted hammer; Mjolnir with no significant effects. He has also endured and survived being ambushed and brutally beaten by a group of super-strong villains including Goliath (Erik Josten) , the Wrecking Crew and Mr. Hyde . Though there is a limit to Hercules' durability it's almost impossible to reach. True Immortality Hercules being remade into a full-god by Zeus As the son of Zeus, the immortal Olympian god, and Alcmena, a mortal queen, Hercules was born a half-god/half-human demigod which meant he was mortal. Because of the many heroic deeds he performed while a demigod, and Zeus' further need of a champion to defend and protect both gods and mankind, Hercules earned full-godhood and true immortality upon his death. As an Olympian god, Hercules is immortal and although he can be wounded or injured, he cannot die by conventional means. Another power Hercules gained when becoming a god is an exceptionally rapid, superhuman healing rate, which allows him to recover very quickly any time he actually is wounded or injured. Hercules is immune to all conventional/mortal diseases and maladies. Due to his godhood/immortality and durability, Hercules is almost impossible to kill. Only an assault that incinerated him or dispersed a major portion of his bodily molecules could conceivably kill Hercules. but even then Zeus or another god of comparable power might still be able to resurrect him. As a true Olympian immortal Hercules doesn't age and remains perpetually at the peak of his physical youth, strength and power despite the fact he is well over 3,000 years old. Superhuman Stamina As an Olympian god all of Hercules' physical abilities are superhuman, though in his case they are enhanced to a greater extent than nearly all other Olympians. This includes his endurance. Hercules' body produces no fatigue poisons, granting him practically endless superhuman stamina and making him virtually tireless. He was able to hold the weight of the heavens upon his shoulders for three straight hours without tiring. Hercules does not fatigue after any exertion, no matter how strenuous or it's length of duration. In addition to these powers, Hercules also possesses superhuman agility (agility greater than that of any professional or Olympic athlete; greater than what is humanly possible), superhuman reflexes and a measure of superhuman speed and quickness. Demigod Power Levels Hercules - Youthful Demigod During his time as a mortal demigod in ancient times and at a much later point, in modern times, when his godhood was stripped by Zeus, Hercules possessed nearly all of the powers he had as a god, but only had them at a greatly reduced level. His durability and stamina suffered the greatest reductions. Strikes and blows he would normally laugh off as full-god could now cause severe injury. Though much tougher than any mere mortal, demigod Hercules also lacked the high-level godly healing factor that would later allow him to very quickly recover from almost any injury. As a demigod, climate conditions such as extremes of cold and heat also had some affect on him, requiring him to adapt to his environment and to adjust his wardrobe accordingly. As a god Hercules has virtually inexhaustible stamina but as a demigod he can eventually become tired and fatigued which requires him to rest. Strangely, Hercules has shown a wide variation of his strength level during his times as a god, a demigod and when completely stripped of his godhood. As a demigod, Hercules has at times he seemed as strong as ever, his limitless strength apparently being his birthright, while at other times his strength has appeared reduced similarly to his stamina and durability. The most drastic example of his lower level of strength as a demigod was perhaps the time he battled the Hulk in the wake of Onslaught having seemingly killed most of Earth's heroes, including the Avengers. Normally, as a full-god, Hercules can fight evenly and indefinitely with even an extremely enraged Hulk, but in this instance, as a demigod, when Hercules battled an enraged Hulk, the Hulk nearly beat him to death despite Hercules using his legendary fighting skills in an attempt to even the odds. Whatever the variations of his strength and power levels between being a demigod and a god, Hercules' physical powers, coupled with his fighting skills, were still great enough to enable him to defeat his half-brother, and full-god, Ares as a demigod during this same period of demigod-hood power reduction. Hercules' physical abilities as a demigod are much higher than when he has been stripped of all godly status and become a non-powered mortal. As such, Hercules' non-powered levels of physical ability should not be misconstrued as or confused with his power levels as a demigod. Abilities Fighting Skills Hercules - Demonstrating archery skills Hercules is Olympus' greatest warrior and champion. When he was still a demigod in ancient Greece, Hercules co-invented, along with Theseus, the first all-encompassing fighting system in human history: Pankration. Pankration is quite similar to mixed martial arts of modern times, as both combine several separate hand-to-hand combat techniques, though the methods used in Pankration were much more brutal and even deadly than modern techniques. As the co-inventor and a centuries-long practitioner of Pankration, Hercules is an expert in many styles of hand-to-hand combat. These include; boxing, wrestling, joint locks, submission holds and the combining of and transitioning between these varied techniques. He has practiced, honed and perfected his fighting skills for over three millennia, thoroughly mastering them. Thor himself has admitted Hercules is his better in hand-to-hand combat. Hercules is also highly skilled in athletics such as the discus, the javelin and the hammer throw. Hercules is a master archer; his godly attributes combined with centuries of training have made him superior to nearly any Earth-born archer. His archery skills are even said to surpass master bowmen such as Hawkeye and Trickshot. Hercules is highly skilled in the arts of boxing and Greco-Roman wrestling (even causing the Thing to submit). Also, Hercules is a very accomplished melee fighter. He has had centuries of training, practice and experience with many types of weapons including but not limited to battle axes and long swords. Personality Hercules - Drinking & charming the ladies Hercules has a very confident and gregarious personality. He believes life is a gift that should always be appreciated by being lived to the fullest every day. This lust for life of his is possibly accentuated and enhanced by his mortal roots and the fact that he has experienced death. Once he has deemed someone suitably noble, Hercules is quick to assume the role of friend, confidant, drinking buddy and/or mentor - often whether the recipient likes it or not. As he has demonstrated countless times in his rather lengthy lifetime, Hercules is also a prolific ladies man and is quite adept at using his looks, charm and reputation to woo women. Additionally, he is equally adept at starting brawls with those he deems worthy of or sturdy enough to receive the greatest thing he believes one man can give another: "The Gift of Battle!" It's his philosophy that men must battle to truly know one and other. Perhaps this explains why Hercules is always ready to brawl/fight either friend or foe at a moments notice. When announcing his intent to bestow "The Gift of Battle," Hercules often abbreviates, calling it simply "The Gift", especially when using it as part of one of his battle cries, i.e.; "Prepare to receive the Gift!" Hercules' other commonly used battle cry is "Have at Thee!" Despite his penchant for revelry Hercules has demonstrated a somber, brooding side at times when he has lost people whom he cares deeply for. During some of these times of mourning, Hercules has been known to overindulge in the drinking of alcohol. In reaction to the treachery of Nessus, which lead to his mortal demise, Hercules forswore the practice and use of archery. Hercules has a strong sense of duty and honor which compels him to stand up for what he believes is right and just no matter what others consider acceptable, no matter what the consequences may be. The courage of Hercules is the equal of his strength; boundless. When a cause is righteous and just, he has always and will always face any danger, fight any foe and battle all evil despite impossible odds or personal risk. He has demonstrated his immense courage in the face of all danger ranging from multiversal extinction-level threats right down to street-level thugs. He's faced these threats no matter what his levels of power, ranging from his normal/classic godly power to beyond Sky-father levels and even when completely de-powered. Hercules has also shown a high level of pride, some would say bordering on arrogance, which has lead to Zeus de-powering him a couple of times to teach him humility. Another quirk of his personality is, probably due to coming from the cultures of both ancient Greece and Olympus (where clothing is optional), Hercules has very little modesty. He often wears a traditional Greek toga, but does not mind, and at times even enjoys, going around nude, despite modern attitudes concerning modesty and nudity. Physical Statistics Weapons and Armor Hercules wearing the skin of the Nemean Lion. Hercules possesses a Golden Mace forged by Hephaestus out of Adamantine, the legendary indestructible Olympian substance/metal after which Adamantium was named. The Mace has survived direct blows from Thor's Hammer, Mjolnir, without damage. When used by Hercules (with his vast strength) the Golden Mace can crush almost any substance or break virtually any barrier. Hercules possesses the skin of the Nemean Lion Skin which acts as an indestructible armor and shield's Hercules from virtually any injury. He is an expert archer as he showed while performing his legendary labors and again now in modern times. Additionally, Hercules has access to a multitude of powerful Greek weapons from ancient myth. These include the sword of Peleus, the shield of Perseus - which has an image of the gorgon Medusa on it and the gorgon power to change living beings into stone - and the arrows of Heracles (his own arrows) - which have been dipped in the blood of the Hydra and are therefore deadly even to gods as well as mortals. Hercules' love of combat, code of honor and sense of fair play prevent him from using his Golden Mace and Nemean Lion Skin armor frequently. However, when the situation does arrive for him to use them, these two items combined with Hercules natural strength and invulnerability turn Hercules, who is already a formidable combatant, into an almost unstoppable force of and for Olympus. Alternate Realities Earth-398 Hercules of Earth-398 was known by his original name, Heracles, and fought for Queen Morgan Le Fay as a member of her super-powered team "The Queen's Vengeance" which was a team analogous to Earth-616's Avengers. Earth-829 Hercules - Earth-829 In this alternate, future, reality, Hercules has a son with a mortal, alien woman named Layanna Sweetwater . This son grows up to be nearly the physical equal of Hercules. His name is Arimathes . After years of manipulation by his bitter mother, Arimathes becomes the ruler of an entire galaxy; a harsh and ruthless dictator. The young emperor harbors hatred and contempt for the father he never knew. Hatred and contempt for Hercules. Eventually the paths of Hercules and his young emperor son cross and the two decide to settle their issues man-to-man in unarmed combat. When the battle is over and the truth of Layanna Sweetwater's is revealed, Hercules and Arimathes put aside their differences deciding to make up for lost time by getting to know each other. Arimathes eventually goes on to father three children of his own, Hercules' three grandchildren, - Antonitus , Ursus and Juno . Due to their Olympian heritage, each of these grandchildren of Hercules inherit a specific godlike super-power. In this timeline Hercules is the savior of the planet/world called Wilamean and as such he commands much adoration and respect for having saved them from Galactus, the Devourer of Worlds. Unfortunately, again a time came when Hercules had to save them, and this time the entire Andromeda Galaxy, too, by sacrificing his own life. The danger was presented when Galactus became part of a massive black hole which threatened the entire galaxy. To save the galaxy, Wilamean and his own family, Hercules, true heroic fashion, flew into the black hole and detonated a white hole bomb which had the effect of reversing the black hole and restoring Galactus. Though Hercules ceased to exist in his typical form, in the process of freeing Galactus from the black hole, Hercules' essence combined with that of Galactus causing the creation of an new, separate being that would be known as the Bringer of Worlds: Cosmos . Other Media The Marvel Super Heroes Hercules - The animated version from 1960's Thor cartoon. Hercules is introduced and used as the main foil for Thor in a Mighty Thor segment of the animated television series "The Marvel Super Heroes" which was produced and released in the late 1960's. Using actual comicbook artwork from the original story, this storyline was closely based on and adapted from "Journey into Mystery" #125 and "Thor" #126-130 in which Hercules and Thor meet and battle fiercely as rivals but later become friends after Thor rescues Hercules from imprisonment in the underworld due to the machinations of the Olympian God Pluto, Lord of the Underworld. The Fantastic Four (1994) Hercules makes brief cameo appearances in the "To Battle the Living Planet" episode of the 1990's animated Fantastic Four series where he, as part of the Avengers, joins the other Avengers and superheroes in rescuing innocent bystanders when Ego the Living Planet approaches Earth. Hercules makes one more cameo appearance, again along with several other Avengers, in another animated Fantastic Four episode titled "Doomsday." In this episode Dr. Doom steals the power of the Silver Surfer and uses it in an attempt to rule Earth. Many heroes make cameos in this episode and Hercules is shown twice; once battling the cosmic-powered Dr. Doom and the other time monitoring Doom's activities with the other Avengers. Super Hero Squad Show Super Hero Squad Hercules Hercules guest stars in "The Super Hero Squad Show" episode "Support Your Local Sky-Father" and is voiced by Jess Harnell. In this episode, Loki, the Asgardian God of mischief, disguised himself as Gyros, God of Pitas, and instigated Zeus into sending his son Hercules to Earth to battle Thor. After a brief battle between Hercules and Thor, Zeus and Odin show up and begin arguing about who is superior. Eventually they decide to hold a contest between Thor and Hercules on Olympus, home of Zeus and Hercules. Hercules and Thor (secretly accompanied by Reptil ) go to Olympus and with Zeus and Odin present; the contest begins. After four challenges, Hercules and Thor were tied with two wins each. Thor won the fifth and final challenge and it was then that Loki revealed his plot, taking control of Zeus and Odin. With help from the Super Hero Squad, Hercules and Thor were able to defeat Loki and free their fathers. Returning to Earth, Hercules and Thor continued their rivalry, rocking out on their guitars while on the Helicarrier. When the Mayor of Super Hero City asked Hercules and Thor if he could film their performance, they threw him off of the Helicarrier. Hercules also appeared In the episode "So Pretty When They Explode," where he assisted Thor, Iron Man, Hulk, and She-Hulk on a mission to rescue Nova from Thanos. Video games

i don't know

Making but a single flight, what was the real name given to Howard Hughes' birch plywood plane, the Spruce Goose?

Spruce Goose In Depth Tutorials and Information Spruce Goose Also known as: HK-1, HK-4 Hercules, Hughes H-4 Hercules, the Hughes Flying Boat, the “Flying Lumberyard” Date: Design work began in 1942; a prototype was completed and one test flight was accomplished in 1947 Definition: In terms of wingspan, the largest aircraft ever built; because of its wooden construction, also one of the most controversial airplanes ever built. Significance: The Spruce Goose flying boat was designed during World War II to transport cargo or troops over long distances; its sole flight, over a distance of one mile in 1947, is a landmark in aviation history; its massive size and distinctive wooden construction have made it a true American icon. Development With a wingspan of 320 feet—longer than a football field—the Spruce Goose has the distinction of being the largest aircraft ever built. Planned and designed during World War II, when materials such as aluminum were in short supply and were reserved for the most urgent military projects, the Spruce Goose earned its name from its nearly all-wood construction. Only the flaps, or control surfaces, were made from fabric; the remainder of the plane was fashioned from layers of plywood especially constructed at the Hughes Aircraft Company plant in Culver City, California. Despite its nickname, the “Spruce Goose,” only about 5 to 10 percent of the craft is constructed of spruce; the remainder is birch plywood. The name stuck, however, because, in the words of one worker, “nobody could think of a word that rhymed with birch.” The idea for such a gigantic seaplane originated with F. H. Hoge, Jr., a member of the Planning Committee of the War Production Board. After German submarines sank some 300,000 tons of British and American shipping during May, 1942, Hoge proposed to solve the submarine problem by building flying boats to transport cargo and troops across the Atlantic Ocean. Unlike conventional aircraft, flying boats could land or take off on bays or harbors and did not need long, land-based runways. The idea intrigued the industrialist and shipbuilder Henry Kaiser, famous for building the Liberty Ships during World War II. In July, 1942, he suggested that the United States build an “aerial freighter” of at least seventy tons, a “gigantic flying ship” beyond anything imagined by the nineteenth-century science fiction writer Jules Verne. Kaiser asked for help from the billionaire Howard Hughes, a crack designer and pilot who had broken several airspeed records during the 1930′s. The project was approved in October, 1942. A team from Hughes Aircraft Company would design the craft and build one prototype and two additional planes. Once tests were completed, Kaiser’s companies would begin regular production. The project was initially designated the HK-1 (HK for Hughes/Kaiser). Once design work had begun, Hughes employees voted to name it the H-4 Hercules. Hughes himself disliked the popular name of “Spruce Goose” and preferred to call the aircraft “the Flying Boat.” The project fell well behind schedule very early, mainly due to a multitude of design and construction problems. Kaiser dropped out of the project, and Hughes was forced by various government bodies to defend the project. Only continued support from the War Production Board and the personal intervention of President Franklin D. Roosevelt kept the project going. Design The problems involved in designing and building such an airplane were massive. Kaiser had suggested that the overall size of the first prototype be seventy tons, but Hughes made the work more challenging by changing the size to some two hundred tons. The goal was an aircraft that could carry 130,000 pounds of cargo or 750 troops (twice the passenger load of a modern Boeing 747). Working at the Hughes Aircraft Company plant in Culver City, California, and at other sites, the Hughes team tested a variety of shapes for air and water efficiency. The final design model, based on decisions largely made by Hughes himself, recorded the lowest air drag of any seaplane ever tested at the National Advisory Committee for Aeronautics’ Research Center at Langley Field, Virginia. Instead of a double-hulled plane, Hughes choose a single-hulled design which would require a wingspan 50 percent larger than the next largest plane of the time, the Martin JRM Mars. It was also decided that the aircraft would have a sizeable single vertical tail. The final design divided the interior of the fuselage into two decks connected by a spiral staircase: a flight control deck for the operating crew and a cargo deck. Two railroad cars could fit in the interior cargo space, on a floor that was designed to carry 125 pounds per square foot. If planks were provided for its tracks, a 60-ton army tank could drive inside, under its own power, without the need to dismantle any part of the tank. The hull also contains eighteen watertight compartments, twelve of which might flood without sinking the craft. In its final design, the Spruce Goose has an overall length of 218 feet. Its 320-foot wingspan exceeds even that of the U.S. Air Force’s modern transport, the Lockheed C-5A Galaxy. The tail alone, at 113 feet, is more than eight stories high. The hull is 265 feet wide and the wings, at their thickest, are more than 11 feet thick. The craft has a gross weight of 400,000 pounds and a range of 3,500 miles. It cruises at 175 miles per hour and has a landing speed of 78 miles per hour. Hughes chose to power the plane with Pratt & Whitney R-4360 engines. Eight of these twenty-eight-cylinder, 3,000-horsepower engines were mounted in the wings. The engines, radial in shape, sport four-blade Hamilton Events in Spruce Goose History May, 1942: Federal government official F. H. Hoge, Jr., proposes that the German submarine threat be countered by the construction of massive “aerial freighters” to fly cargo and troops across the Atlantic Ocean. July, 1942: Industrialist Henry Kaiser proposes that the United States build “aerial freighters” of from 70 to 500 tons. August, 1942: Kaiser suggests that billionaire and aviator Howard Hughes meet with him concerning the “aerial freighter” project. November, 1942: A new Kaiser-Hughes corporation signs a federal government contract to design and manufacture Spruce Goose aircraft. June, 1946: Sections of the Spruce Goose are moved from the Culver City, California, plant of the Hughes Aircraft Company to a final assembly site near Long Beach, California. August, 1947: Hughes begins testimony before a congressional committee investigating the Spruce Goose project. November, 1947: Hughes flies the Spruce Goose for the distance of a mile in Long Beach Bay. February, 1982: The Spruce Goose is moved to become a public exhibit alongside the ocean liner Queen Mary in Long Beach. October, 1992: The Spruce Goose is shipped via ocean barge to Portland, Oregon, to become a public exhibit in McMinnville, Oregon. Standard propellers more than 17 feet in diameter. There are a total of 448 spark plugs to service and maintain. Although the total engine horsepower of 24,000 is impressive, the engines’ ability to lift a craft of more than 400,000 pounds is a real achievement for both their makers and the Hughes team’s overall design efforts. Flight controls that would respond reliably and quickly were a special problem for such a gigantic aircraft. The layout of the flight controls on the flight deck is conventional—a dual column and wheel to turn the elevator and ailerons, and pedals for the rudder. Less conventional is the way that the craft was designed to respond to these controls. Instead of a mechanical system, Hughes and his team chose a hydraulic system in which pressurized oil moves the control surfaces. Purely mechanical links between the flight deck and the rest of the plane would have required the strength of 150 to 200 men just to turn the controls. Mechanical links also are unreliable in such a massive aircraft. The Spruce Goose is so large that changes in temperature could cause metal parts to expand and contract, possibly jamming in the process. In addition to wing fuel tanks, there is a central fuel system in the hull. Fuel lines in the wings, however, have slip joints to allow for wing deflections of as much as 13 feet during flight. The Spruce Goose pioneered the use of a 120-volt DC electrical system in airplanes. This relatively high voltage leaves a safety margin in case of electrical leakage in any of the 32 miles of wire inside the Spruce Goose. It also allows manageable wire sizes to be used. (A 24-volt system, the engineers calculated, would have required solid aluminum rods 2 inches in diameter in order to carry the current.) Electrical relays are specially designed to work at high altitudes. Construction A special building at Culver City, claimed to be the world’s largest wooden building at the time, was used to build the subassemblies of the Spruce Goose. The most challenging construction problems involved the extensive use of wood. The Hughes team spent a great deal of time fashioning a wood construction process that would hold together in the stresses of flight. Although metal would be available in sufficient quantities during the last two years of World War II, that was not true when the Spruce Goose project began. At that time, aluminum and other key materials were reserved for higher priority war projects. The structure of the aircraft was created from laminated layers of wood. The process chosen for laminating the wood, called Duramold, had first been used by Hughes in 1934 to construct parts of his record-breaking H-1 racer airplane. Birch was selected because it created a stronger plywood than spruce. To secure the most suitable birch wood, a team of specialists was sent to inspect and purchase trees in Wisconsin. Layers of wood were bonded together with three different types of epoxy glues, and heat and steam were applied to “cure” the glues. The process required special jigs and construction techniques, some of which have remained secret. Workers had to wear gloves, since the oil from fingerprints might weaken a glue joint. For the wings, some 8,000 nails were used to hold the wood layers together until the glues had cured. All had to be removed later with special nail pullers. Considerable sanding of the plywood exterior was necessary. A coat of wood filler was applied to all exterior surfaces, followed by a layer of sealer, a layer of rice paper, and two coats of spar varnish. The final step was a layer of aluminized spar varnish, which gave the Spruce Goose its silver color. These steps produced a smooth, glossy finish that was said to be more air efficient than aluminum skins, which require large numbers of rivets, which cause drag. Assembly and Flight In the summer of 1946, one year after World War II had ended, the subassemblies of the Spruce Goose, including the hull, tails, and wing sections, were transported to a dry dock and assembly site near Terminal Island, in the vicinity of the Long Beach naval base. In 1947, the project came under attack from Republicans in the House of Representatives, who insisted that the Spruce Goose was a fitting symbol of the wastefulness of the Democratic administration of President Roosevelt. One congressman termed the flying boat “the flying lumberyard.” Although Hughes defended the project passionately in congressional hearings, privately he told company workers to accelerate the project or “the next time you’ll see me in jail.” Hughes, who had spent much of his time during the war working on another aircraft, the XF-11, now worked at the assembly site for the Spruce Goose full time, although, characteristically, he did his work at night. OnNovember2,1947, a test of the plane was scheduled which involved taxiing the craft across Long Beach Bay. Some members of the press were invited to ride aboard the plane, and Hughes took the controls. After two successful trips across the bay, Hughes increased the plane’s speed during the third attempt. He delighted a sizeable crowd of onlookers by lifting the plane off the water. After traveling for a mile at a height of about 70 feet, the craft landed smoothly. Although it was the only flight ever made in the Spruce Goose, it became a memorable moment in aviation history. Although Hughes described the test flight as “just great,” he never flew the craft again. There are varying opinions as to why he made no further attempts. Some argue that the plywood construction was not totally satisfactory (some workers claimed that Hughes attempted to address this by adding a corrugated aluminum skin and metal stiffeners into the gigantic wing). Others believe that Hughes saw congressional criticism as a challenge and lost interest after the successful flight. Yet Hughes continued to spend money on the aircraft. Although the original plans had called for three Spruce Gooses, no other versions of the planes were ever produced. The prototype remained in Hughes’s control for the remainder of his life, sitting in a hangar that was air-conditioned to provide the proper humidity to preserve the wood. The craft was kept airworthy and the engines were fired up every month. The Spruce Goose was painted white. Hughes continued to make improvements, such as installing more powerful engines. When flooding damaged the Spruce Goose, Hughes built a larger hangar. While the United States government spent some $22 million on the project, Hughes spent an estimated $7 to $18 million dollars of his own money to complete and maintain the Spruce Goose. The Spruce Goose as an Exhibit Four years after Hughes’ death in 1976, rumors circulated that the airplane was going to be disassembled so that pieces could be given to museums around the country. There were public protests, and the United States House of Representatives voted to declare the Spruce Goose a national treasure. Finally, the airplane was moved to another section of Long Beach, where it was put on display next to the ocean liner Queen Mary. Its new home was the world’s largest geodesic dome, some 400 feet in diameter. In 1988, the owner of the Spruce Goose, the Aero Club of Southern California/Aero Exhibits, sold the aircraft to the Evergreen Aviation Museum of the Evergreen Aviation Company in McMinnville, Oregon. A large section of the geodesic dome was removed to allow the Spruce Goose to be disassembled and placed on an ocean barge for its long journey.

Hercules

Sailor Jack and Bingo are the mascots for what prize awarding snack food, now produced by Frito Lay?

How the 'Spruce Goose' Became Part of a Water Park How the 'Spruce Goose' Became Part of a Water Park by James Careless As the home of Howard Hughes’s gigantic “Goose” airplane, the Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum in McMinnville, Oregon, is a must-visit attraction for aviation buffs. Even without the Spruce Goose—the WWII eight-engine behemoth whose size has only been surpassed by the double-decker A380 and Boeing 747-8—there is a lot to see. The museum’s displays include the Wright Brothers’ 1903 Flyer (replica), the famous DC-3 (original), the rocket-like SR-71 Blackbird supersonic spy plane (original), and a Mercury space capsule (original). However, there is more to the Evergreen and Aviation & Space Museum than historic aircraft. The facility is also home to the 3-D Evergreen Theater, a Boy Scout campground, summer camps, cafes, gift shops, and the Wings & Waves Waterpark. That’s right: A water park. Specifically, the Evergreen Wings & Waves Waterpark has 10 water slides designed for everyone from little children to big risk takers. There are also a wave pool, a playground, indoor party rooms, and a children’s museum that teaches kids about the power of water. On top of the 70,000-square-foot children’s museum is an actual Boeing 747-100 aircraft. Sitting on heavy-duty steel supports along with the museum’s roof structure, the 747 is the upper hub for many of the park’s water slides. “The top of the staircase, where you enter into the 747 to go on the water slides, has clear glass walls that look out onto the aircraft and its wings,” says Larry Wood, a former fighter pilot and the museum’s executive director. “Because the aircraft is angled upwards you feel like you are standing on the wing as the 747 lifts off from the runway!” Putting the 747 in place was a major challenge, he adds. “When the winds were up, the crane-hoisted aircraft wanted to move like a weathervane!” As for attendance: 200,000 to 250,000 visitors come to the museum annually. In its first six months of operation beginning in 2011, the water park has attracted an additional 125,000. So yes, the Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum is a successful attraction. A Humble Beginning McMinnville, Oregon (population 32,187), is the home of Evergreen International Aviation. It was founded in 1960 by Delford Smith under the name Evergreen Helicopters. The company began by developing helicopter-based crop-spraying and forest firefighting, which were ground-breaking advances at the time. As the company’s helicopter operations expanded, Smith moved into the jet airliner business by founding Evergreen International Airlines. Today, its fleet of 747s flies freight on both scheduled and charter flights. The 747-100 that sits on top of the children’s museum is a retiree from the Evergreen fleet. (Pop culture sidenote: Evergreen 747 #N473EV starred in the 1990 Bruce Willis film “Die Hard 2.”) The Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum was created by Delford Smith and his son, USAF pilot Captain Michael King Smith. “The two of them had amassed about 10-12 vintage planes, which they were keeping on site at the Evergreen facility,” says Larry Wood. “One day Mike said to his father, ‘You know, we’ve got this great collection, we should find a museum and share them with the public.’ His father Delford agreed, and the Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum was born.” Enter:  The ‘Spruce Goose’ The museum started small, with the planes being put in an Evergreen hangar that was opened to the public. But then Howard Hughes’s “Spruce Goose” became available, and the Smiths decided to acquire it as the centerpiece of a living museum. Today, Howard Hughes is largely remembered as a reclusive, obsessive, and rather bizarre billionaire who spent his time holed up in expensive hotels. However, that was only the sad end to an amazing life story, one in which Hughes was a legendary pilot—he set many world records—and an incredibly innovative aircraft designer. The “Spruce Goose” —properly named the H-4 Hercules—was one of Howard Hughes’s most impressive innovations. The goal was to build a heavy transport flying boat—one that could land on water—that could move troops and equipment into WWII battlefield areas. But since metal was scarce, the H-4 was built almost entirely out of birch plywood! The history of the H-4 could fill this entire magazine, and a few issues more. Suffice it to say, the “Goose” took years to finish and only flew once before being permanently grounded in flight-ready condition by Hughes. Upon his death, the aircraft was put on display in a large dome (next to the Queen Mary steamship) in Long Beach, California, in 1980. The Walt Disney Company eventually took over both sites. But after a plan to build a Port Disney attraction fell through, the “Spruce Goose” was in need of a new home. “Twenty-nine museums, including ours, competed for the right to display the ‘Spruce Goose,’” Wood says. “But since we were the only ones willing to build a large exhibition hall with the aircraft as its centerpiece, the Southern California Aero Club (the airplane’s owner) awarded the H-4 to us.” Moving the “Spruce Goose” from California to Oregon required taking the plane apart and putting it on barges—and then trucking the pieces nine miles to McMinnville. After it arrived, the aircraft was restored inside a shelter until the large, airy hall with glass end walls—an Evergreen architectural trademark—could be built. “We then moved the ‘Spruce Goose’ inside and began putting it back together for our opening on June 6, 2001,” Wood tells Funworld. “The aircraft has since become one of our signature attractions.” Today, the “Spruce Goose” sits in one of the exhibition halls at the museum. All are built in lofty open halls with lots of windows and head space for aircraft tails. Next, a Water Park Delford Smith and his son devoted considerable time and money to create the Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum. After Captain Smith’s tragic death in a 1995 car accident, his father became even more ardent in his efforts. “Any parent who has lost a child has a strong emotional response to the loss,” observes Wood. “Mr. Smith’s response was to give even more to the project that his son loved so well.” With this said, the Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum is a self-sustaining operation. Although Delford Smith has helped by investing in new projects, it is the job of Wood and his staff to keep the place busy and the registers ringing. This is why Evergreen built its Wings & Water Waterpark. “You can count on hardcore aviation buffs to attend, but we need a larger base if we are to succeed over the long term,” says Wood. “That’s why we built the water park: It brings in the kids and their families. And if we can sneak some science education into them while they’re here, so much the better!” There are enough water slides here to keep everyone happy. For instance, the “Nose Dive,” “Sonic Boom,” and “Tail Spin” slides combine two-person inner tubes with wild moves and drops. In contrast, the “Mach 1” is a super-fast enclosed body slide, “with tight-wrapping turns, switchbacks, and drop sections that leave the stomach in the air,” says the description at www.evergreenmuseum.org . Then there are the pools: The “Leisure Pool” is gentle and calm; “Splashdown ­Harbor” is 91,000 gallons of wave pool action, and the “Vortex Pool” pulls swimmers into a high-speed whirlpool. One might wonder how and where the interactive H2O children’s museum fits into this mix. “Simple: You can only spend so many hours climbing stairs to go down water slides,” Wood says. “If you give tired kids a place full of hands-on displays that they can play with, including a submarine, then you can make the entire family happy. And you can slip in some teaching while you’re at it.” A Passion for Education Teaching is the real theme of the Evergreen museum story: The underlying mission here is to teach people of all ages about science—and to excite them about it. After all, it is science that made the wonders of the Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum possible, especially homegrown science by Americans just like those who visit the site every day. “We are passionate about learning,” Wood says. “That’s why we offer outreach classes to schools, where our people keep the kids entertained and bring truly neat science toys to play with. It is also why we build so much learning into our facility, including the water park. And it is also why all of our major openings are tied to June 6. That’s the date of D-Day, and every opening is thus a chance to talk about our country’s contributions and sacrifices in WWII and other major conflicts.” Of course, the outreach program is an effective way to promote the museum to potential visitors. So is an ongoing multimedia campaign on TV, radio, and in print. “We also have presences on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.com,” says Samantha Boehm, the museum’s director of marketing, public relations, and special events coordination. “We also have a few videos on YouTube, including video of the 747 being put on the museum roof.” (You can see it online at www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_c99FadVCM .) A Look Ahead With a combined attendance of 375,000 visitors annually, the Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum is bringing the crowds in. “Moreover, we have managed to keep the museum’s attendance rates stable, despite the recession,” says Wood. “That’s no mean feat.” As for the future, Wood is thinking big. “We plan to add a chapel for weddings and special events, move and then open an enlarged campground for Boy Scouts and visitors, and then construct a 96-room hotel,” he says. “The hotel will be along the lines of the great 1930s-era WPA lodges. It will feature stone walls and wood, a big lobby area with a fireplace, and an airplane suspended overhead.” (Note: WPA stands for Works Progress Administration. This was a federal government make-work project during the Great Depression that built ­­rustic lodge-style hotels across America.) Clearly, the Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum is well on its way to becoming a destination not just for locals but for families from across the United States and Canada. It is an audacious plan, to be sure­—the kind of audacity that Howard Hughes would likely have approved of. James Careless is an experienced freelance writer with credits at Business Week, NBC News, and NPR. He is a frequent contributor to Funworld. 5 Tips for Making Education Fun 1. Make your education interactive: Evergreen’s H2O museum features lots of hands-on play for kids. This gets them involved, whereas static ‘do not touch’ displays do not. 2. Theme attractions to tie directly into your educational content: The Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum has done this by using a Boeing 747 as the centerpiece of its water park. 3.  Link major un­veilings to historic events: The Evergreen Aviation & Space Museum’s new attractions are always open on June 6th. This gives staff a chance to talk about D-Day, which took place on June 6, 1944. 4.   Offer Outreach ­programs that combine fun and learning: The Museum’s visits to schools ­feature fun toys and activities. This keeps the kids engaged, while the program’s science content keeps the teachers happy. 5.  Use education as a respite for tired guests: Families can only spend so much time climbing stairs to waterslides. The H2O museum gives everyone a place to relax and unwind—while learning about science at the same time.  

i don't know

From what animal does the delicious meat mutton come from?

Lamb and Mutton Close Lamb and Mutton All Co-op fresh lamb and chilled prepared meals are sourced from farms in England, Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and New Zealand (when British lamb is out of season). Our Truly Irresistible fresh lamb is produced from native breeds in the Cambrian Mountains of Mid Wales. Why buy British Lamb & Mutton? British lamb & mutton is produced to some of the highest welfare standards in the world. No growth-promoting hormones are fed to sheep in the UK and any antibiotics are administered only under veterinary direction. Britain's sheep industry is the envy of the world: breeding from livestock and genetics from our native breeds are much sought after by farmers in other countries. British lamb & mutton travels less far from farm to shop so regardless of how carbon footprints are calculated it self-evidently has a lower carbon footprint. Choosing British lamb & mutton means supporting British farmers whose work helps to keep the British countryside the way we want it to look: no sheep - no countryside!  Simply Beef and Lamb provides a wealth of information about lamb, including many delicious recipes to try. AHDB Beef and Lamb is the organisation for the English beef and lamb industry. How to tell if the meat is British? Lamb or mutton labelled 'British' must come from animals born, reared and slaughtered within the UK. If you are not buying direct from a farmer you might find it helpful to look for a quality mark. These mean that all stages of the food chain have been independently checked to ensure that they meet the required standards. The main Lamb and Mutton marks are below.    Quality Standard Lamb has been produced and processed through a fully assured independently audited supply chain. The quality standard mark for lamb is the only one to have standards relating to eating quality such as age, sex and, at certain times of the year, maturation. A St George's flag on the mark indicates that the meat has come from an animal born, raised and slaughtered in England. A union flag indicates it is born, raised and processed to the same standards but of UK origin. The Scotch Lamb mark confirms that the animals have been born and reared for all of their lives on assured Scottish farms and that they have been slaughtered in an approved abattoir in Scotland. The standards are set by Quality Mark Scotland's assurance schemes. Scotch Lamb has been awarded the European PGI mark that recognises special regional significance and so the marks will often be accompanied by the PGI logo. The Welsh Lamb mark can only appear on lamb that has been born and raised in Wales and that has been slaughtered in an approved abattoir. Welsh Lamb has been awarded the European PGI mark that recognises special regional significance and so the marks will often be accompanied by the PGI logo. Where the Mutton Renaissance logo is used, the meat will have met the standards of the Mutton Renaissance campaign. One such standard is that maturing of the meat to ensure a full flavour. When looking to purchase lamb, keep an eye out for marks such as the Red Tractor logo For more information on logos and marks visit our Logos and Marks page. Which cut of lamb & mutton is best? We tend to equate 'eating quality' with tenderness and succulence. It is therefore important to use the correct cut of meat for a particular dish: for example, chop for pan-frying, shoulder for Sunday joints and neck for stewing. To download a diagram of where different cuts of meat come from on the carcass and a guide to which cuts are the best ones to use for different regional dishes click the blue box on this page.   When to eat British lamb & mutton? Although available all year round, British lamb & mutton are seasonal products. Spring lamb is available from early spring until the summer. It is very tender but does not have as much flavour as lamb later in the year as it has not had as much time to graze. It should be cooked simply. Autumn lamb is available from the summer until December. It has had more time to graze and grow thus developing stronger flavours that can take more adventurous cooking. Lamb from Christmas until the following spring is called ‘hogget’, though few retailers and caterers use this term. Hogget has a pronounced flavour, which works well with seasonal root vegetables. Mutton is at least two years old. Mutton is available year-round but is best, and most readily available, from October until March. It has a much stronger, gamier flavour than lamb. A favourite of the Duke of Wellington and Mrs Beeton, mutton was at one time more popular in the UK than beef, and was eaten in both palaces and cottages alike, across the country as it was considered superior in texture and flavour to lamb. Changes in farming and cooking lead to mutton’s sudden decline and for the last fifty years mutton has almost disappeared from our shops and restaurants. The Mutton Renaissance campaign was launched in 2004 by HRH The Prince of Wales to support British sheep farmers who were struggling to sell their older animals, and to get this delicious meat back on the nation’s plates. The National Sheep Association is currently undertaking a project to assist existing and potential producers to expand the market for quality mutton, and to make it once again available to all. Much Ado About Mutton is an excellent book with a wealth of information about the meat.   Regional variations and flavour Sheep spend most of their lives grazing outside and their flavour will be dictated by their diet and the environment in which they are reared. For example: Mountain lamb spends all its life on the hills and mountains of Britain where plants, such as heather, influence its flavour. Hill and upland breeds are used and the lambs are smaller due to their environment. Downland lamb grazes on a range of plants supported by the chalk-rich soil of the Downs. Lowland breeds are used and they have bigger carcasses. Salt-marsh lamb grazes pastures that are regularly washed by the tide, which means that the lambs eat the unique plant species supported in those pastures, for example sea lavender and samphire.  Breeds It is important that we protect our great native livestock industry buy buying the real thing, not an imported substitute. For example: Blackface is the most numerous breed in Britain and one of the hardiest, the vast majority are found in Scotland. The meat has a reputation for unrivalled sweetness and tenderness. The Downland breeds hails from Southdown, Dorset Down, Oxford Down and Hampshire Down and are all noted for having high quality, succulent meat with good marbling and delicate, sweet, flavour. Herdwick is the native breed of the central and western Lake District, they are a hardy of British breed that grazes on the highest of England’s mountains. Look out in particular for Herdwick Macon Ham: whole, smoked, cured hams made from the hind leg of Herdwick sheep. It has a pronounced gamy lamb flavour with herb undertones and a mild smokiness. Portland sheep are native to the South West of England. The meat is of exceptionally high quality with fine texture and excellent flavour. Welsh Mountain and Welsh Speckleface have full of flavours from the wild herbs on which the animals graze. The sheep are smaller than normal breeds, and as a result, the various joints of meat may be up to 30% smaller.

Sheep

There are some things money can't buy. For everything else, there's what?

Leg of Lamb, Boneless, 100% Grass-Fed | Shop D'Artagnan Ships in an uncooked state Product of Australia Use within 3-5 days of receipt Our goal in all we do is to provide healthy and delicious meat that comes from a clean and sustainable environment. We are dedicated to finding ranchers and farmers that share our vision of a more humane and sustainable way of rearing livestock. That’s why we work only with those who respect nature and focus on the best animal welfare practices. D’Artagnan sources lamb from Australia, where there is a strong tradition of pasturing these woolly ruminants. Our humanely-raised lamb comes from a clean and natural, free-range environment where the young animals graze on grasses like rye and clover in spacious pastures and semi-arid rangelands. Most importantly, when lambs are raised this way there is no need for antibiotics to prevent disease, as is common in crowded feedlot conditions. Our lambs are never, ever administered antibiotics, hormones or any other unpleasant substances. The Border Leicester-Merino, Dorset and White Suffolk cross-breed sheep are raised to maturity in 6 months, instead of the more typical 9-12 months. The idyllic growing conditions, low-stress environment and the young age of the lambs all ensure a clean, mild-tasting meat that is never gamey. Our Lamb Our pastured lambs are raised humanely using traditional methods in the rangelands of Australia. In keeping with our principles, they are free from antibiotics and hormones. The stress-free environment produces tender and mild meat, proving that the best practices can be tasted on the plate. You Might Also Like:

i don't know

In drinks, what ingredient is the difference between a White Russian and a Black Russian?

Black Russian Cocktail and White Russian Cocktail from Real Restaurant Recipes White Russian Cocktail Favorite Restaurant Cocktail Beverage From the reading I have done, a Black Russian and soon after, a White Russian cocktail recipe, first appeared around 1949. Supposedly a Belgian bartender named Gustave Tops invented the beverage in honor of the U.S. ambassador then living in Luxemborg. He used Russian vodka in addition to Kahlua in his recipe. He named the cocktail because it was the time of the Cold War with the Soviet Union, or so people think. The name of the cocktail may also be simply because he was pouring Russian vodka. The beverage is traditionally poured over crushed ice in an old-fashioned glass. The White Russian cocktail appeared soon after. It also is made with vodka and Kahlúa with the addition of cream. Milk is often used as a substitute for the cream but in doing so, it does change the taste of a White Russian. The name of the drink is either because of the added cream or because the name of an anti-Bolshevik group during the Russian civil war was the "White Russians." No one knows for sure, but we do know the cocktail is not traditionally Russian. Kahlua is a Mexican coffee-based liqueur and is one of my personal favorite liqueurs. It is delicious and is found in many cocktail recipes. Black Russian Recipe

Milk

The best selling comedy recording artist of all time, which comedian is best known for his "You might be a redneck" one liners?

The White Russian Cocktail You must be logged in to post a comment. Adding comment …  brsguner posted 7 months ago you may use milk instead of cream i guess brsguner posted 7 months ago dude rocks... alxxngh.6201 posted 12 months ago As a Dudeist Priest, this is the report I have received: Vodka alone (rocks or neat-doesn't matter) is a "Russian." Vodka & Kahlua is a "Black Russian." Vodka, Kahlua & cream is a white Russian. Furthermore, if you get a box of Yoo-Hoo chocolate drink & dispose of half of it & refill the box with vodka, you've got a "White Trash Russian." The Dude Abides . . . dave26845.1a8c4 posted 1 year ago I bought the Old Mr. Boston De Luxe Official Bartender's Guide. It does not list a White Russian or a Dirty Bird. It lists a Russian Cocktail which is Gin, Vodka, and Creme de Cacao . It also lists a Russian Bear Cocktail which is Vodka, Creme de Cacao, and sweet cream. That is what is closests to what people now know as a White Russian. And it is the regular Creme de Cacao. The only drinks it lists with White Creme de Cacao are all grasshoppers and something called a Pink Squirrel. Just FYI. billvill posted 1 year ago “The Dude abides.” doctor_work_ac9fc posted 2 years ago You have a double "the" in the heading for the ingredients: Ingredients in the the White Russian Cocktail. Whocares1 posted 2 years ago jeffreyblaismanetzerocom687816 is wrong. I made this account so that I could simply say, he is wrong. A Dirty Bird is essentially a White Russian with a quick shake added at the end. White Russian has been around, in this format, since the 30's. Learn to research you noob! laura1957 posted 2 years ago As to the previous comment: I've been drinking White Russians since the 60's (made with Kahlua), so if the name changed it happened way before the Big Lebowski. jeffreyblaismanetzerocom687816 posted 2 years ago The Big Lebowski??? sorry they screwed it up Before that movie was even an Idea the White Russian was made with White Creme De Cacao not Kahlua. The recipe you are listing as a "White Russian" was at that time called a "Dirty Bird". I know this for a fact because I owned, back in the late 70's a copy of the "Old Mr. Boston Bartenders Guide". Which listed both drinks with there proper names. But because some writer didn't bother to get his facts straight. Common usage has renamed the dirty bird. Doesn't make it correct, only common. ~ all comments loaded ~

i don't know

Who was Captain America's sidekick during World War II?

Captain America (Rogers) (Character) - Comic Vine Captain America The Captain America (Rogers) wiki last edited by Renchamp on 01/04/17 03:41PM View full history Origin America's Super-Soldier: Captain America After the outbreak of World War II in Europe, a young HYDRA agent disguised as an American patriot named Steve Rogers attempted to enlist in the U.S. Army but was rejected, due to his skinny, anemic physique, and was classified 4-F. However, he garnered the attention of certain people including scientist Doctor Abraham Erskine who was searching for suitable volunteers/test subjects for a top secret experimental program designed to create an army of Super-Soldiers. As a result of Operation: Rebirth , Steve Rogers gained speed, strength, flexibility, endurance and agility of nearly superhuman levels. These heightened abilities coupled with his unwavering courage and “never say die” attitude eventually made him Captain America, a living legend. For information on the Captain America that substituted for Steve Rogers when the latter apparently "died" in 2007 see the Bucky Barnes character page. Creation Captain America was created by Joe Simon and Jack Kirby as a response to the booming popularity of patriotically-themed super heroes in the 1940's. Though it was rare for any character, let alone a new one, to get a self-named title in those days, he debuted in Captain America Comics #1 (March,1941). He was depicted fighting Adolph Hitler himself on the cover even though the United States had not yet entered World War II and wouldn't for another 9 months. Debuting along with Captain America in this comic was his teenage partner Bucky, and his arch-enemy the Red Skull . This issue sold nearly one million copies and Captain America soon became Marvel's best-selling character. "Cap" (the nickname he came to affectionately be called) spent World War II punching, kicking and defeating Nazis, Japanese, and other Axis members. In addition to help from Bucky, he battled the Axis forces alongside other Marvel (Timely) stalwarts: the Sub-Mariner and the Human Torch . Simon and Kirby did ten issues before leaving Timely to work for DC . When the war eventually ended, superheroes fell out of favor and comics sales declined. Captain America Comics was printed up to issue #75 , but by then it had become a horror book and soon ended. Captain America was revived by one of his original co-creators Jack Kirby and Stan Lee during 1964 in issue #4 of the Avengers . This was the start of Cap as we know him. He became an instant hit and was soon leading the Avengers. A short time later he shared and co-headlined a comic called "Tales of Suspense" along with fellow Avenger Iron Man . He has since become one of the cornerstones of the Marvel Universe and even transcended comics becoming a true American icon. Additionally, Captain America has been recreated many times over the years in comics featuring stories that take place in alternate universes. One of the most well-known alternate universe versions of Captain America is in the Ultimate Universe. Major Story Arcs The War Pre-Super-Soldier Serum Steve Rogers On July 4, 1920, Steven Rogers was born to a pair of Irish immigrants. Steve was always a courageous kid as well as a diligent student, but he wasn't very athletic and he was quiet and introverted, because he was so skinny. Although he would eventually grow to 6'2, he was scrawny and weak, always last in athletic games (much like one Peter Parker , that would be born much later). A target for bullies as he grew up, he was protected by his best friend Arnie Roth , and, on at least one occasion, by neighborhood tough-guy Duvid Fortunov . Though it wasn't apparent at the time, he possessed fierce loyalty, a courageous fighting spirit and a noble heart. Knowing he had no future in athletics, Steve majored in fine arts and was an exceptionally talented artist specializing in illustration. His life changed, though, when the Axis forces sweep across Europe starting World War II. Seeing their atrocities on newsreels, Rogers becomes convinced they need to be fought and that the European war would soon pull America into the conflict, inspiring him to enlist in the U.S. armed forces to fight against the Axis forces. Becoming Captain America Steve Rogers: Bombarded with Vita Rays When he tried to join the U.S. military Steve was immediately rejected due to him being physically too skinny and classified as "4-F." Steve was puny and didn't even come close to passing the mandatory physical exam for induction, although he wanted with all his life to serve his country, he was rejected and stamped out. It seemed there was nothing he could do. He eventually made an impression on the Army recruiters and trainers, however, when he convinced them just how desperately he wanted to do his part, and how it was his dream to fight for America against the Axis powers. Steve caught the attention of an officer who was looking for men to volunteer as test subjects for an experimental program which was part of a top-secret defense plan known to only a dozen men or less. The experimental program was called Operation: Rebirth. The plan was to create physically superior soldiers with a new serum dubbed the Super-Soldier Formula. If it worked, it would make ordinary men into super soldiers. They would become perfect physical beings; possessing strength, speed, stamina, agility, reflexes, and recuperative powers that bordered near the upper limits of human evolutionary potential. After a rigorous process to choose a suitable candidate, Steve Rogers was chosen to be the first man whom the Super Soldier Serum would be administered to. It was Dr. Abraham Erskine who had developed the process, and it was he who administered it to Rogers. Rogers was injected with the Super Soldier Serum and was then bathed in Vita-Rays which activated and stabilized the serum's chemicals in his system. The process worked perfectly; Steve Rogers' entire physical being was boosted to the maximum of human potential and efficiency. In addition, he virtually doubled in size as millions of new cells were created almost instantaneously. His muscle strength, flexibility and reflexes improved to the peak of human potential. Steve marveled, he had become the ultimate specimen of human physical power and ability as all weakness and deficiencies drained from his body. Just then, a Nazi spy burst in with a gun. He cried "Hail Hitler" and shot Erskine through the head. In order to keep Nazi spies from obtaining it, Erskine hadn't written down the serum's ingredients, along with much of the procedure, having instead committed it to memory. Therefore the secret of the Super Soldier Serum died with him. Steve Rogers would be the only Super-Soldier. He chased after and caught the Nazi spy who'd assassinated Erskine and broke his neck, killing him. He then vowed to use his power to fight the enemies of America and become a symbol of freedom. Captain America & Bucky The U.S government, disappointed at the loss of their planned super soldier army was determined to use Rogers to his fullest potential. To this end, they decided to use him as a superhero to fight the Nazis; to become a symbol of freedom and hope against Nazi forces as well as a counter-intelligence agent. He also would be their answer to and main weapon against the leader of the Nazi terrorist operations - the Red Skull . The U.S. Government gave him a costume based on the American flag, an unbreakable shield (given to him by President Franklin Roosevelt ), a sidearm, and the name Captain America. From that point on, Steve Rogers was Captain America. A short time later he was stationed on an army base in Virginia serving as Private Steve Rogers. While there he continued his extensive training and was deployed several times both domestically and abroad on covert missions. When on base as private, Steve purposely developed a persona and reputation as a clumsy soon-to-be soldier. It was also during this period that he meets Bucky Barnes - a young teenager who accidentally found out that Steve Rogers was secretly Captain America. With the U.S. Federal Governments permission, Steve trains Bucky and makes him his sidekick. Captain America and Bucky became a formidable fighting duo during World War II. Invaders The two fight crime and Nazis on their own and, after Pearl Harbor, help found the Invaders , an Allied superhero team that fought against the Axis and their super-powered agents. The Invaders were featured in a comic book of their own in the 1970s. Recently, it has been stated that Bucky was already being trained when Steve/Captain America met him at the military base, hence, his being able to fight side-by-side with Cap almost immediately despite not having any super-powers. During a mission to the African nation of Wakanda , Cap met King T'Chaka , the then-current Black Panther (this was later retconned into being Azzari , T'Chaka's father). As a show of good faith, the Black Panther gave Cap a small amount of the rare metal vibranium , which would be used to construct his iconic shield. In return, Cap gave the Panther his original, triangular shield, which would be held on display in Wakanda for decades to come. A few years passed, and, in part due to Captain America and the Invaders' contributions, by 1945 the war was drawing to an end in Europe with the Allies driving the Axis troops out of the countries they had occupied. With the Nazis retreating Cap and Bucky were on a routine mission trying to stop the evil Baron Heinrich Zemo from harming civilians using an unmanned drone plane. The patriotic duo engaged Zemo and his troops but before he was could be stopped Zemo managed to launch the drone plane up into the air towards allied forces armed with a huge bomb. Racing towards the plane as it was about to launch, Captain America and Bucky managed to jump onto it so they could try to defuse the bomb. Cap realized they couldn't defuse it in time and tried to get Bucky, who was closer to the bomb, to jump off. Tragically, the bomb exploded and seemingly killed Bucky while throwing Captain America into the freezing waters of the north Atlantic Ocean . All searches to rescue or recover them failed and both were eventually presumed dead. Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes were both believed to be dead for many years, and efforts to replace them were attempted to varying degrees of success. Replacing A Legend The Spirit of '76 With Captain America presumed dead (though actually frozen in a block of ice) the U.S. Government decided that Captain America was a valuable public relations tool that was still needed. Even though the war was won, they figured if the American public found out Cap was dead, their morale would be severely diminished, something that could not be risked while Japan continued to fight Allied forces in the Pacific. As it would turn out several replacements were needed to try to carry the mantle of "Captain America." The first replacement the U.S. Government recruited was formerly the Spirit of '76 , a patriotic superhero whose physical abilities were similar, but less than, those of Captain America. His partner, a new “Bucky”, was Fred Davis , a very athletic but still normal young man. This Captain America and Bucky team operated very well fighting crime, communism and aiding other super-heroes (working with the All-Winners Squad ). Unfortunately this Captain America's tour of duty ended when Adam II (an android) killed him in 1946. The U.S. Government still felt having a "Captain America" was necessary so they again recruited one. This next replacement Captain America was the Patriot , Jeff Mace, another Golden Age/World War II super-hero. This Captain America also had a partner code-named "Bucky" but, unfortunately, two years into their stint this "Bucky" was shot in the legs, sustaining injuries that prohibited him from being Bucky any longer. Yet another former super-hero, this time the female, Golden Girl , became Cap's crime-fighting, commie-busting partner until they both quit to marry each other. Determining that replacing Captain America and Bucky properly was quite difficult as well as risky to his iconic reputation, the U.S. Government finally let the idea fade and there was no Captain America and no Bucky. 1950s Commie-Bustin' Cap In the 1950s, there was a brief run of the Captain America comic where, in keeping with the spirit of the times and the newly started 'Cold War' with communist Russia and China , Captain America becomes a more aggressive, conservative, communist-fighting character. When the real Captain America made his return in the '60s, the appearance of the '50s Cap was left unexplained, until Steve Englehart started on the book. In 1953, a man named William Burnside found the lost formula for the Super-Soldier Serum in Nazi files in a German warehouse. This man idolized and almost worshiped Captain America. He had a Ph.D. in American History and he had done his thesis on Captain America. He immediately tells the government about the formula in exchange for becoming the next Captain America. He underwent plastic surgery to look like Steve Rogers and was set to be the symbol for the Korean War. However, the project was never finished, so "Steve Rogers" became a teacher. While teaching, he finds a young student named Jack Monroe (eventually known as Nomad ) who also is a huge Captain America fan. They use the formula on themselves and became the new Captain America and Bucky. They fight Communism, but they didn't know of the Vita-Ray process that was required to stabilize the recipient after taking the super soldier formula. Since they don't take it, it affected their minds and they became overly paranoid, attacking anyone they even have the slightest suspicion of being a Communist, seeing threats to America where none existed. The government quickly realized they were out of control, and shut them down, placing them in suspended animation. Years later they are freed by a disgruntled government employee. Newly awakened in the 1970's, they confront the real Captain America and his new partner, the Falcon . Regarding the differences that underpinned this confrontation, Steve says, "In this case, the comics mirrored their eras; the late '30s-early '40s Cap was a liberal and the early '50s Cap was a conservative. The first one looked up to Roosevelt; the second looked up to McCarthy. That's about as fundamental as it gets." Thus, it was not only a physical battle, but a battle of ideologies in which Cap confronted the impostor with just how out of touch and extreme he has become, and in doing so, manages to defeat him. The Modern Age Ironically, it was Cap's former Invaders teammate, Namor the Sub-Mariner , who finds an Inuit tribe worshiping a frozen figure in a block of ice near the icy waters of the North Atlantic. Namor, seemingly enraged that they are worshiping an inanimate object, lifts the block of ice and hurls it into the sea. Apparently damaged by the impact of hitting the water, the ice began breaking apart revealing the frozen figure within as a man. The Avengers, who are still in the area, after battling the Hulk and Namor, spot this man floating in the water and pull him aboard their craft. They soon recognized the iconic uniform the man wore beneath his torn and tattered clothing and identified him. He was Steve Rogers, Captain America! The Avengers determined he was still alive and they revived him. Upon becoming conscious, Captain America didn't recognize any of the Avengers so he assumed they were Nazis and immediately sprung into action battling the entire team alone. Fortunately, the battle and misunderstanding ended quickly. Joining the Avengers Rick Jones tries being "Bucky" From his impossibly youthful appearance and actions after his revival the Avengers determined he had been preserved in a state of suspended animation while frozen in the ice. Though he was out of his own time and unfamiliar with the modern world he is still at his. Recognizing his value as skilled fighter in combat, a great tactician, and a natural leader; the Avengers invite Captain America to join their team. The Living Legend of World War II accepted, and soon became team leader, a position he has held more times than anybody else. This was quickly followed by his own monthly gig in the Tales of Suspense anthology, wherein he shared equal billing with Iron Man. He was involved in the Avengers' first great roster shakeup, where he led a team consisting of himself, Scarlet Witch , Quicksilver , and Hawkeye . During the final arc of Tales of Suspense before it was renamed Captain America, Cap met and befriended the African hero Black Panther , beginning a friendship that would last many years. Cap appears in an extended run by Stan and Jack in which Captain America leads the Avengers for a long time, fighting their enemies and some of his old enemies-such as Baron Zemo. He finds out what had happened to Bucky, his young World War II partner, and is devastated. He was grief-stricken for many years. Shortly after Captain America's revival, honorary Avenger Rick Jones convinces Cap to let him become the new Bucky and partners with him for a short time. Captain America doesn't want to be responsible for another young partner's death. Just as he relents, and allows Rick to assume the Bucky identity, the Red Skull (Cap's arch-enemy from World War II) uses the Cosmic Cube to drive Bucky away. Afterwards, the title's creative reins transferred over to Jim Steranko . A Silver Age stylist who helped redefine comic art expectations. One of his greatest Marvel triumphs was in the pages of Captain America! The issues of Cap #110, 111, 113 were packed with high drama, proportion expanding page layouts, and Steranko's sultry, spy-oriented action. Captain America and The Falcon While acclimating to modern times Captain America became reacquainted with old friends and met with people with whom he became friends and allies. Colonel Nick Fury was a fellow veteran whom Cap had met and served with during World War II when Fury lead the Howling Commandos as a sergeant. They reunited, becoming friends and allies again. Fury now leads the intelligence agency S.H.I.E.L.D and when situations beyond the capabilities of his agents cropped up, Fury would frequently ask Cap to undertake and complete these missions for S.H.I.E.L.D. Later, he meets Sam Wilson, an African-American social worker from Harlem whom Captain America met on Exile Island. Captain America trains Sam to become the Falcon and Captain America's new partner renaming his series Captain America and The Falcon. Throughout their partnership they combat numerous foes including the Grey Gargoyle, Scorpion, Mr. Hyde, The Serpent Gang and even the Red Skull. Nomad Steve Rogers as Nomad A bit disillusioned, Captain America retired his mantle due to the Watergate scandal. Later he was convinced by Hawkeye to continue fighting evil leading him to adopt a new superhero persona; the Nomad . However, after the death of the new Captain America, Roscoe, at the hands of the Red Skull, Steve realized that the costume is a powerful symbol of American ideals and not a tool for the government; he became Captain America once again. Relishing his return to his Captain America role, Steve nonetheless promises to never forget what he learned during his time as Nomad. Nest he fought the Red Skull once more and it was revealed that Red Skull had been a burned out youth in Germany before a chance meeting with Adolf Hitler himself. Seeing the inner anger and sensing his potential for evil, Hitler trained the boy to be his protégé and he eventually became the Red Skull. Captain America defeated the Red Skull again, preventing him from using his Dust of Death to first decimate the population and then to attempt the restart of the Third Reich with which to take over the world. U.S.Agent Steve Rogers as The Captain New enemies came, such as Flag-Smasher and the Scourge of the Underworld . Captain America also resigns his role when the government tries to force him to work solely for them. He is forced to relinquish his shield and costume, which are turned over to John Walker , the new Captain America. Donning a black costume given to him by D-Man and a new black shield designed by Black Panther, Steve takes on the identity of "The Captain." The Captain assembles a group of heroes consisting of himself, Falcon, D-Man, Nomad (Jack Monroe), and Vagabond , with the heroes traveling across the U.S. to fight crime. During this time Steve has some questionable run-ins with the law that made him realize how much credibility he had as Captain America. Sometimes he even had to resort to working outside the law as much as it pained him. Cap and Walker tussled a few times, until Walker was driven insane. Cap's team disassembles around this time, and the Captain tries to assemble a new roster of Avengers during the events of Inferno . His first new recruit, D-Man, is seeming killed on his very first mission. The Captain eventually discovers that Red Skull is responsible for Steve being ousted and replaced, leading to a final battle which leaves the Skull disfigured. Steve is allowed to reclaim his iconic costume and shield, while Walker is given the black outfit and shield, and becomes the hero known as U.S. Agent. Later, it had been revealed that the chemicals that allowed the Red Skull to retain his youth had worn off, and now the Red Skull was in his 80's. The Red Skull had kidnapped several of Cap's closest allies including the Falcon, and forced Captain America to revert to his natural age by subjecting him to the same artificial aging process that he used to advance his own daughters age. The two had one final battle where they would battle as equals. Cap came out the victor but refused to kill the Red Skull, who died right after the battle of a heart attack. Cap's youth was one again restored by the Avengers. Cap Armor Cap's armor During the Streets of Poison story arc, Captain America had discovered that Avengers staff member Fabian Stankowicz had been on a new street drug called Ice. After suspending Fabian and sending him to rehab, Captain America had taken it upon himself to clean the streets of drug dealers. During a raid on a warehouse, a drug dealer blows the building up and Captain America finds himself caught in the fumes of Ice. Captain America finds himself hooked on the drug which makes him prone to violence and causes outburst of rage. Caught in a the middle of a turf war between The Kingpin and The Red Skull, Captain America's condition worsens until he subdued by Diamondback and The Black Widow. Captain America undergoes a blood transfusion to cleanse his blood of the drug; he is however temporarily stripped of the super soldier serum. Vowing to break the drug circle, Captain America heads to Yankee stadium where a final confrontation between the Red Skull and Kingpin occurs to determine who would control drug trafficking in New York. At the stadium Captain America is confronted by Crossbones, after a brutal fight Steve Rogers prevailed proving that even without the super soldier serum, he could still be Captain America. However disaster strikes when Captain America avoids an explosion at a drug lab full of a chemical that causes a reaction with the Super-Soldier serum in his system. It alters his biochemistry, and he begins to deteriorate. He turns to Iron Man, who helps him by making a powered exoskeleton for him in the vein of the Iron Man armor. Eventually, he is cured by a transfusion of blood from none other then Red Skull, who had transferred his mind into a cloned body of Captain America. The Expatriate During the “Man Without a Country” story arc, Steve Rogers briefly dons the costume of The Expatriate. After The Red Skull brings Cap back to life he is filmed storming a military base alongside both the Red Skull and Sharon Carter. Bill Clinton temporarily exiles Rogers to the UK until the matter is sorted out and his name can be cleared. As not to associate himself with the United States, Steve wears an all-blue costume, similar to Isaiah Bradley’s uniform, but with no stars or stripes. It is also at this time when Steve first receives the Plasma Shield, although it only forms a yellow buckler, as opposed to his later, more spangled Plasma Shield. Onslaught The Truth: Red, White and Black Captain America's successor: Isaiah Bradley After Steve Rogers' participation in Project: Rebirth, the U.S. Army tested the early version of the Super Soldier Serum on 300 black soldiers. A married man and father to a newborn girl, Isaiah Bradley was a infantryman at Camp Cathcart, Mississippi in 1942, during the first year of the United States involvement in World War II. Bradley's platoon is among the 300 test subjects that were randomly chosen from the two of the all black battalions are Cathcart which were murdered after the 300 left for Project Super Soldier. Barbaric medical practices are performed on the subjects. The surviving seven were sent forward to Europe, one of their number dying on the boat ride to complications with the serum. The remaining six entered the war in July 1942. Bradley's only known costumed mission involved the destruction of the Nazi Super Soldier Project at Schwarzebitte, Germany in October 1942. Bradley steals a spare Captain America costume that had been set aside for Steve Rogers who was to lead the mission. He completed his mission, however he is captured and later interrogated by Hitler himself before being shipped off to Auschwitz. Bradley escaped and is taken in by the German and Belgian Underground Resistance. He is eventually able to sneak back to behind Allied lines in 1943, but receives a court-martial from the Army and a sentence to life imprisonment for stealing Captain America's costume. Bradley served seventeen years and was released by President Dwight D. Eisenhower on the day of President John F. Kennedy's inauguration. Bradley was the only test subject to survive the war. He became an underground legend among the Marvel African-American community - he was their Captain America. Eventually, however, the serum's long-term effects damaged Isaiah Bradley, in his body and mind. He became childlike and began to disappear as a hero. It was then that he is discovered by Steve Rogers, who tracks him down and acknowledges his sacrifices and heroism. Isaiah Bradley remains as one of Cap's greatest allies - the black Captain America. He is the grandfather of Elijah Bradley , Patriot from the Young Avengers . The New Avengers Eventually, the Avengers broke up, in Avengers Disassembled after the Scarlett Witch had a nervous breakdown and killed a few team members. For a few months there where no Avengers. Captain America however soon found himself in a situation that brought together many of New York's superheroes once again. Finding destiny to have struck twice, Captain America formed the New Avengers, together with Iron Man, Luke Cage , newcomers Sentry and Ronin and known superheroes such as Wolverine and Spider-Man . Iron Man soon found a headquarters for the team and so the New Avengers where born. The Winter Soldier Rogers revealed his secret identity, and then encountered a new villain named the Winter Soldier who assassinated the Red Skull. The Winter Soldier's secret identity turns out to be Bucky Barnes, and he was under the control of a Russian businessman and former Soviet general named Aleksander Lukin . Steve later learns that Bucky had been rescued by the Soviet Union, who brainwashed him and made him their own assassin. Eventually, Bucky's memory was returned to him when Captain America willed it back with Lukin's Cosmic Cube (which Lukin took from the Red Skull). Civil War For further details: Civil War A super-human battle in Stamford , Connecticut causes the deaths of hundreds of school children and leads directly to the superhero Civil War when the public called out for super-humans to register their powers, abilities, and identities, and hang up the costumes. In the wake of this horrible tragedy, the Super-human Registration Act is quickly passed. This new law requires every super human in the United States to register with the federal government, submit to evaluation, training and even become a government operative. Some heroes are for it while some were against it. Captain America is the most highly-respected hero against it. He believes it infringes on the rights and personal freedoms of super-humans. He elects to lead the anti-registration faction of heroes against the pro-registration people, who are led by none other than his friend and fellow Avenger; Iron Man. Cap and the other heroes refusal to register immediately makes them all technically criminals and fugitives to be hunted down by S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, police, their former friends, and even enemies/villains who'd registered and agreed to work as government operatives. The two factions clash several times with Iron Man beating Cap savagely in their first fight. However, as the War goes on, Cap's side grows by recruiting and attracting mostly street-level heroes like Daredevil , Luke Cage , and later Spider-Man (after he defects from Iron Man's pro-registration side). Captain America's faction even recruits one true powerhouse; Hercules . Eventually, Cap's anti-registration faction gained enough strength to match Iron Man's pro-registration forces. Captain's morals were sorely tested too, when he enlisted the help of many figures he would normally apprehend and turn over to the authorities. The most notable of these questionable allies were Frank Castle, a.k.a. the Punisher and Wilson Fisk, a.k.a. the Kingpin . Eventually events lead to the final confrontation between the opposing factions where Captain America confronted and batters Iron Man. The tide of the battle was turning in favor of Captain America's forces and victory was at hand when a group of ordinary civilians intervene and attempt to restrain Cap. It was at this moment that Captain America realizes he was endangering the very people he had sworn to protect. "We're not fighting for the people anymore. We're just...fighting." he said tearfully, surrendering even as he was about to win. Captain America then removed his mask, surrendered to authorities as Steve Rogers and orders the anti-registration forces to stand down. As Rogers is led away in handcuffs, the Punisher retrieves Captain America's discarded mask. The majority of the other anti-registration heroes subsequently elect to register, while some decide to take their chances, stay outside the law and remain fugitives. After his arrest, Captain America is incarcerated by the federal government to await trial. The Civil War strains relationships between the former Avengers, too. Thor was dead. Iron Man and Captain America led opposing forces. Hank Pym was on Iron Man's side, Vision was on Cap's. Due to the Scarlet Witch's mental instability and breakdown the Avengers had been disassembled already (in Avengers Disassembled ), but the events of the Civil War made it nearly impossible for the team to reform and function effectively. Eventually, several different versions of the team either formed or re-formed as the Mighty Avengers , the New Avengers and the Secret Avengers . Fallen Son For further details: Fallen Son: The Death of Captain America The tide of the superhuman Civil War turns, as Captain America is assassinated in a scheme perpetrated by his greatest foe, the Red Skull. It is later revealed that Steve Rogers is not dead. When S.H.I.E.L.D. and Tony Stark take possession of Captain America's body, and they wanted to conduct tests because he was the only perfect Super-Soldier. What they discover was the serum seems to have reversed the effects on his body after he died. Though his death demoralized even those he had fought against, the new order of super heroes had already begun, spearheaded by Iron Man, who had been appointed as the new director of S.H.I.E.L.D. with the launch of the Fifty State Initiative program, Iron Man's dream of a dedicated super hero team in each U. S. state was being realized. Little did he suspect that the mounting Skrull invasion was secretly placing one of their agents on each of those teams. In Captain America: New Deal, Steve Rogers left instructions for Tony Stark in a letter written before his death to "save" Bucky and that the mantle of Captain America should go on. When the Winter Soldier (Bucky) is brought into S.H.I.E.L.D. custody, he managed to escape, only to attack Iron Man. The two fight to a standstill until Stark mentions the letter from Steve. Bucky isn't sure that Cap had meant for him to actually become Captain America. Tony said that there's no way Bucky would let anyone else fill those boots and asked if he wanted to be the one to let Steve down. Bucky says he'd do it under two conditions. The first was that his mind would be completely probed to ensure there was no trace of brainwashing or fail safe code-words left over from when he was under control as the Winter Soldier. The second condition is that he doesn't have to answer to S.H.I.E.L.D. or to Stark, just as Steve didn't. Tony thought about it and agreed. The Norse god Thor later communicates with the spirit of Steve Rogers on the one-year anniversary of his death. Captain America Reborn For further details: Captain America Reborn As the machinations of the Red Skull continue despite the intervention of the new Captain America, Black Widow and the Falcon, he and Arnim Zola reveal to an astonished Norman Osborn that the gun Sharon Carter used to kill Steve Rogers actually froze him in space and time at the moment of his death. That moment of spatial and temporal stasis could be used to bring back his body from any moment in the future via a modified version of Dr. Doom's time device and Sharon Carter herself, whom they referred to as "the constant." At the time of the intended retrieval, Sharon's actions disrupted the process, resulting in Steve being lost in time and space. He is shown reliving moments of his past, most notably events during the Second World War, badly disoriented and bewildered. While going through the time stream, Steve finds himself back in 1944, at one of the Red Skull's bases, fighting Master Man. As he begins to fight Master Man, Cap figures out that he has somehow been sent back in time and reliving all of the battles he has fought in over the years. After he defeats Master Man, Steve is then sent to the time he met with President Franklin Roosevelt at the White House . Back in the present, Bucky and Black Widow begin to fight Ares and Venom inside a H.A.M.M.E.R . Helicarrier, but Bucky and Black Widow are defeated and taken to Norman Osborn. At the Baxter Building , Hank had brought Sharon Carter to Reed Richards , so that he could examine her. While Reed does this, Hank mentions that Falcon and the Vision are out looking for Bucky and Black Widow, since they never returned from their mission. Reed then tells Hank that he has found something in Sharon's blood stream, Reed then mentions that there was something similar to what's in Sharon's blood, in Steve's body that Reed had found after he had done an autopsy on it. Reed then tells Hank that there was something Tony Stark didn't like about the rapid cellular decay in Steve's body. Norman then meets with Crossbones and Sin , telling them that he knows about the second shooter and that he would love to have a Captain America on his side, leading his Avengers, even if the Red Skull's mind was in that Captain America's body. Back in the past, Steve finds himself back in 1940 with Dr. Erskine, Steve then begins to ask the doctor about time travel and what would happen if someone were to go back and kill Hitler before all of this madness began. Dr. Erskine then tells Steve that doing something like that would have both an action and reaction that could end up making it so that your loved ones might have never been born. After this, Steve is taken into a lab and is about to relive the moment he became Captain America, Steve knows that the doctor is going to be killed by a Nazi spy, but is forced to do nothing but go through with the experiment. After he does, the doctor is killed and Steve begins to ask himself why he is reliving all of his past memories. Back at the H.A.M.M.E.R. Helicarrier, Norman is talking to the now captured Bucky and Black Widow, Norman then reveals that he had told the whole world that Sharon Carter was the second shooter in the assassination of Captain America and is now the world's most wanted. Norman then tells them that he is letting Black Widow go so that she could tell Sharon that if she doesn't turn herself in within twenty-four hours, Norman will kill Bucky. Still trapped in time, Steve relives the time he was trapped in the ice, he begins to wonder why he even keeps track of the time anymore, since he believes time has no meaning for him now. As he ponders on this, Namor appears, as Steve knew he would, picking up the large chunk of ice that holds Steve. Everything happens like it always did, Namor throws the piece of ice into the water, even though Steve tries to yell Namor's name, to where Steve would be found by the Avengers. Back in the present, Reed Richards has met with Namor in the Arctic Ocean, where Steve's body was secretly laid to rest. Reed asks Namor to raise Steve's coffin, which Namor had already done, and as Reed examines Steve's body, the body disappears, shocking both Reed and Namor. As Reed tried to figure out what happened, he gets a call from Hank Pym, who tells Reed that Norman Osborn has outed Sharon Carter as the second shooter who killed Captain America, and to Black Widow's disapproval, Sharon tells them that she's going to turn herself in. Elsewhere, Bucky is being transported by Norman's Thunderbolts, while Sharon tries to figure out what she should do. Back in time, Steve finds himself reliving his time during the Kree-Skrull War , fighting alongside Clint Barton , who was going by Goliath at the time, fighting off an army of Skrull soldiers. Steve watches Iron Man, Thor, and Captain Marvel , Steve then asks the Vision, who had asked him to meet with the other Avengers on the command deck, if the Vision could remember something and then store it deep in his memory storage, something Vision said he would have no problem doing. Back with Bucky, Falcon attacks the Thunderbolts' jet, fighting off the Thunderbolts, while the Thunderbolts' Ant-Man frees Bucky, after that Bucky and Falcon escape unharmed. Still jumping through time, Steve finds himself reliving the time he and Rick Jones, who was going by the name of Bucky at the time, fight off a group of HYDRA agents. Steve then feels the remorse of losing the original Bucky, his close friend James Barnes, when he almost calls Rick "Bucky". Back in the present, Norman Osborn has announced that Sharon Carter, Steve's lover, was the second shooter in his death. While he does this, Sharon is being taken to Latveria . At the Infinite Avengers Mansion , Hank Pym and Mr. Fantastic activate the message Steve left with the Vision back during the Kree-Skrull War, telling them that he is lost in time. Elsewhere, Bucky, Black Widow, and Clint Barton (Ronin), attack a H.A.M.M.E.R. mobile data-collector, trying to find out where Sharon Carter is. Once in Latveria, Sharon is shocked to see that the Red Skull is alive still, and is with Dr. Doom. They quickly then attach her to a machine that will bring Steve back to the present. In the English Channel Islands, 1945, Steve finds himself and Bucky escaping Baron Zemo's fortress. Bucky and Steve then jump onto the drone bomber that will explode, sending them to their apparent deaths, only to let them live to become who they are today. Steve, who has relived this day so many times in his mind, and nightmares, decides that he won't let Bucky get blown up again and become the Winter Soldier. As he tries to stop Bucky, Steve is suddenly pulled back through time, he then finds himself being attacked by the Red Skull as he flies through time. Steve's body then appears in Dr. Doom's lab, but as Sharon calls out to him, it is revealed that the Red Skull has placed his mind in Steve's body, and is now in control of Captain America. Steve then finds himself in a nightmarish world ruled by the Nazis and the Red Skull. The Red Skull, who is now on his way to the White House to meet with the President to ruin Captain America and what he stands for once and for all. But as they make their way to D. C., the Skull captures the Vision who is trying to sneak on board to rescue Sharon, and commands his ship to attack the Avengers Quinjet which is chasing after them. The A.I.M. ship takes out the Quinjet, causing it to crash in front of the Lincoln Memorial. The Avengers are forced to fight the Skull's forces. While that happens, Steve finds where the Skull is hiding in his mind, and they begin to fight over control of Steve's body. Meanwhile, Bucky fights the Red Skull outside of Steve's body. But Bucky shows that he can't kill Steve, even if it is the Red Skull controlling him. . The Red Skull then takes Bucky's shield, stating that “what's Captain America without his shield?” He then cuts off Bucky's bionic hand, saying that it's time for a new morning in America. But before Red Skull can kill Bucky, Steve is able to force the Skull out of his mind and back into his robotic body, gaining control over his body again, and finally returning to the world he left. Sharon Carter then uses one of Hank Pym's size changer devices to make the Red Skull into a giant, making sure he can't escape this time, Steve and Bucky then team up with the rest of the Avengers, fighting the giant Red Skull, and finally are able to seemingly kill the Red Skull. As they do so, the public sees Steve among the heroes, and yell with joy as they see that Captain America has returned. Back in New York , Steve remembers that he saw the future while he was going through time, and that he believes Bucky is going to die, but before he can think about it more, Sharon comes to get him to come down to his party. Four days after his return, Steve had been training with Bucky, getting back into shape. He talks to Sharon, telling her how he's worried that he may slip away back into time again, she then tells him that he's not going anywhere and that she has him. Later that night, Steve decides to suit up and go out into the city, to see what has changed. He finds Captain America (Bucky) and Black Widow as they fight the Hyde who has escaped from The Raft. As Hyde tries to escape from the battle, Bucky sees Steve watching from the sidelines and throws him his shield, allowing him to defeat Hyde all by himself. Steve then says that was fun and hands Bucky the shield, but Bucky refuses telling Steve that he's Captain America and that's his shield. Steve then tells Bucky that they need to talk. Steve tells Bucky that he should keep being Captain America, that it means something more to him, which Bucky disagrees with, saying that Steve is the only Captain America. Steve then tells him that he's not sure if he's ready or will ever be able to pick up his shield again, and asks Bucky to continue being Captain America, if not for himself, then for him. Steve then returns to Sharon, telling her that he believes that if Bucky doesn't continue to be Captain America, that he may die, and Steve could never live with that possibility, even if it means giving up the future he wants. Steve then meets with President Obama , who gives Steve a Presidential Pardon for what he did during the Civil War, saying that he felt the S.H.R.A. was un-American to him. Steve then tells the President that he may not be able to pick up his shield again, President Obama then tells Steve that that is okay, that he has a feeling that in the coming days, America is going to call on Steve for something much bigger. The Heroic Age For further details: The Heroic Age Commander Rogers After the Dark Reign of Norman Osborn and his Dark Avengers , Steve Rogers is called on again for duty, but now as America's new "Top Cop" ( S.H.I.E.L.D . director). Steve accepts the job and assembles two new teams. The Avengers under Maria Hill's command and the Secret Avengers for covert missions under Steve's direct command. Steve's first line-up of Secret Avengers include his long-time love interest Sharon Carter , Brunnhilde the Asgardian Valkyrie , Nova the Prime Centurion of the Xandarian Nova Corps , former Avenger and X-Man Beast , Black Widow , Moon Knight and War Machine . During this time, he joins the Illuminati and is given possession of the Time Gem , one of the legendary Infinity Gems . Fear Itself Broken by The Serpent During the Fear Itself storyline, Steve Rogers is present when the threat of the Serpent is known. Following the apparent death of Bucky at the hands of Sin (in the form of Skadi), Steve Rogers ends up changing into his Captain America outfit. When the Avengers and the New Avengers are fighting Skadi, the Serpent ends up joining the battle and breaks Captain America's shield with his bare hands. Captain America and the Avengers teams end up forming a militia for a last stand against the forces of the Serpent. When it comes to the final battle, Captain America uses Thor's hammer to fight Skadi until Thor manages to kill the Serpent. In the aftermath of the battle, Iron Man presents Captain with his reforged shield now stronger for its uru-infused enhancements despite the scar it bears. It is then revealed that Captain America, Nick Fury, and Black Widow are the only ones who know that Bucky actually survived the fight with Skadi as Bucky resumes his identity as Winter Soldier. Spider Island During the events of Spider Island, Steve Rogers is captured by the Jackal when he was investigating in the former location of Project Rebirth. The Jackal mutates Steve into a giant spider creature, which he calls Spider King. The Jackal then impregnates him with thousands of spider eggs, so that the Spider King could spread the virus to other areas in the world. The Spider King was stopped by Agent Venom but escaped capture when some of the eggs he was carrying hatched. He was re captured and put into suspended animation. Agent Venom disguised himself as Spider King, in order to infiltrate the Jackal's secret base. Steve was given a cure and was reverted back to himself. He joined Agent Venom in the fight against The Queen, who was secret person behind Spider Island. Steve rallies the other Avengers, X- Men and other heroes to stand and fight against the large army to give Spider-Man a chance to cure the infected people. Avengers vs. X-Men When Steve learns that the Phoenix Force is coming for Hope and learns that Cyclops is ready to take the risk and will allow the Force to come to Hope, he right away takes the Avengers to Utopia to tell Scott that that is too risky and they cannot take such a big risk. When Cyclops tells Steve that the Phoenix Force has being doing only good during the years, Cap tells him the risks and Cyclops starts the attack against Steve Rogers and the Avengers.Later when Steve sees that they cannot win this war he uses their only hope, Wanda Maximoff. They are able to take Hope but a lot of Avengers are being held captive in a prison in Utopia.Later when Steve has no other hope he tries to gather the Illuminati again but not all of them come, Namor is the one that doesn't come but the others come and go because they don't have hope or they believe that the Phoenix Force is actually good. But later when everybody's gone Namor comes. Marvel NOW! Captain America is featured in his own title, where he is abducted by Arnim Zola's minion to his own dimension, called Dimension Z. There he saves Arnim Zola's infant son, Leopold, from his own father's terror. Captain America raises Leopold as his own son, naming him Ian . After ten years time, still trapped in Dimension Z, Zola retrieves his long lost son, brainwashing him to hate Captain America and love the will of Zola. While getting out of Dimension Z Ian was shot by Sharron Carter and left for dead but unknown by Captain America Ian survived and has now become Nomad. Sharon Carter was also left for dead in Dimension Z but no one has seen her body to confirm it. Captain America also recruits the latest roster of The Avengers together with Tony Stark . He is himself part of the team as team leader. During an incident involving Universal Incursions , Captain America attempts to use the Infinity Gauntlet to solve the problem, but fails. During a subsequent argument about what path the Illuminati should take, he is mindwiped by Doctor Strange and expelled from the group After Avengers vs. X-Men he tries to show the world that mutants and humans can work together, so he founds the Avengers Unity Squad , consisting of himself and Thor, Wolverine, Scarlet Witch, Rogue and Havok , the leader of the team. Time Runs Out The aged Steve Rogers During the events of Original Sin , Captain America regains his memories and vows to bring the Illuminati to justice. Around this same time, an encounter with a Chinese supervillain named the Iron Nail results in the Super Soldier Serum being drained from Steve's body, leaving him a withered old man. Sharon and a teenage Ian return around this time, having miraculously survived their apparent deaths in Dimension Z. Steve decides to step back from active superheroics, appointing Sam Wilson as the new Captain America, while Ian takes over as the new Nomad. He remains an active member of the Avengers by serving as their operations director. He continues his war on the Illuminati until the two sides are able to come to a temporary truce in order to deal with the Incursions. Personal Information Status Identity: Publicly known Occupation: "Top Cop" of America, adventurer; former public works artist, special SHIELD operative, freelance illustrator, police officer, history teacher, sparring partner, soldier, WPA artist Citizenship: U.S.A. Place of Birth: Manhattan, New York City, New York Education: High school graduate; one year of art school; military basic training; private tutoring in hand-to-hand combat, gymnastics, military strategy, piloting, demolition, and other disciplines Marital Status: Single Known Relatives: Steven Rogers (Captain America, ancestor, deceased), Joseph and Sarah Rogers (parents, deceased) Powers and Abilities Powers Super-Soldier Serum In the beginning the Super-Soldier Serum increased his body to the physical peak of human potential or rather the next step in human evolution (though still a non-mutant). He is as strong, fast, durable and agile as any human could one day be - and his strength is referred to as being preternatural. His reflexes have also been increased to peak human potential and are nearly instantaneous (he is also capable of 'seeing faster' - enabling him to dodge bullets). He has run a mile in roughly a minute (approx 57 mph) and has bench-pressed 1100 pounds for reps (just as a warm up). His one-rep maximum is likely much higher. He also has uncanny accuracy, being able to hit multiple targets with a single throw of his shield, and having enough marksmanship to turn a lighter on and off through a shield throw alone. Another major enhancement provided is the serum prevents the build-up of fatigue poisons in his muscles. This means he effectively never tires, making it possible for him to perform at his maximum ability when doing anything physical for an extraordinary length of time. However Captain America has displayed feats that would appear to be far outside the limits of a human. One of Captain America's most recent durability feats is him surviving a 200ft fall on top of a car from an airplane and suffering no discomfort. Steve's enhancement has also allowed him to survive building collapses and major explosions. The serum also enhances his constitution, making him immune or highly resistant to many diseases and increasing the speed at which he heals from injuries and recuperates from illness. The serum is constantly being replenished by his body down to a cellular level. Abilities Cap is a master of a large number of martial arts and has developed his own fighting-style which melds jujitsu, boxing, judo, karate, pressure points, all-terrain acrobatics and the use of his shield. He is also able to learn how to use most weapons quickly, as Beast has described Cap of being capable of mastering any weapon in seconds. He has used chi manipulation and many other techniques. He is a quick learner and learns these skills fast. He is an expert with his signature shield. He can hit multiple throws by calculating ricochets. His aim is top-notch. Cap is also a great leader, field commander, and tactician. He led the Avengers for a long time, and his great experience makes him a seasoned commander on the battlefield. He also creates the plans for the Avengers, and has a great fighting spirit. He is an expert in reading codes, maps, and doing other military-related skills. He speaks English, German, Russian, Japanese, and some Italian. Paraphernalia Equipment Captain America is usually seen with his Captain America armor that is bullet proof and is red, white, and blue. His costume covers up everything except his nose, mouth, and ears. Captain America's Shield Cap's trademark weapon is his vibranium alloy shield in which he always carries around. The shield is virtually unbreakable, and absorbs the kinetic force of anything that strikes it, which enables Cap to ricochet the shield off of objects and allow it to come back to him. Despite it being nearly unbreakable, it has shattered a few times, but has needed a highly powerful being to do such a feat such as Thanos with his Infinity Gauntlet or Odin's brother, the Serpent. After giving it to Bucky Barnes, has got a new costume and weapon. He would once again become Captain America and wield shield, but lost his serum and would become an old man. He would give the shield to Falcon as the new Captain America until Steve was again restored back to his youth but allowed Sam to keep his trademark round shield and would wield an all new one. Cap's currently wielded shield is similar in appearance to his classic, triangular shields he would use before he got his vibranium round one. This shield is made of an unknown metal, but is highly durable. The shield can split into two parts with the bottom part being capable of being shot at an opponent or disconnected if someone were to grab it. The biggest feature of the new shield is that of a laser blade that forms along the point of it that enables Cap to cut through things like steel with utter ease or used to dismember opponents. Alternate Realities Ultimate Universe (Earth-1610) Ultimate Cap In the Ultimate universe, Captain America's origin was much the same. He became a hero due to the Super-Soldier Serum and fought in World War II. His sidekick is Bucky , who photographs him and writes articles about him but isn't a costumed fighter. In his final mission, he attempts to sabotage a Nazi nuclear missile, and the resulting explosion throws him into the Atlantic Ocean, putting him in suspended animation. He is discovered fifty years later by Tony Stark , and after reconciling with Bucky, is drafted into the Ultimates as the team's field leader. He played a crucial part in the team's first mission - the Manhattan Crisis - when Bruce Banner injected himself with a Hulk serum mixed with Steve's blood, causing him to Hulk out and go on a rampage. During the battle, Captain America nearly manages to inject the antidote into Hulk, but Hulk ultimately prevents this. Regardless, it was Captain America who formulated the winning strategy by sending Wasp into the Hulk's brain. Banner's brain was the one soft part of his body, and Wasp's stings successfully bring down the berserk Hulk, changing him back into Banner. After the Crisis, he learns of Hank Pym abusing Janet Pym, and proceeds to beat Giant-Man up. After successfully leading the team to defeat the Chitauri (an alien race of Nazi-allied shapeshifters whom Cap fought in WWII), Steve begins to date Jan. Captain America would then go on to lead the Ultimates in several other missions, including a clash with the Ultimate X-Men and fighting the supervillain group Six - which was comprised of Ultimate Spider-Man's villains. Six months after the battle with the Chitauri, Captain America participates in the team's joint operation with the European Defense Initiative to take down Thor. Thor had just recently quit the team, and his half-brother Loki's reality manipulating powers manage to trick the Ultimates into viewing Thor as a threat. Thor is soundly defeated by the two teams, and after the battle, the Ultimates would be sent into a Middle Eastern nation to destroy their nuclear arsenal. But Loki's meddling is far from over, and after Black Widow betrays the team and kidnaps Hawkeye while murdering his entire family, Loki magically alters the cameras in Hawkeye's home to make it appear as though Captain America was the perpetrator. As a result, S.H.I.E.L.D. successfully detains and incarcerates Cap. But all of this turns out to be ruses to weaken America when the Liberators - a superhuman army comprised of the USA's enemies, attacks the nation. But Captain America is eventually freed with the help of the Wasp, and along with the rest of the Ultimates and America's superheroes, launches a counterattack against the Liberators. In the ensuing battle, Captain America defeats and executes the Liberators' leader, fellow super-soldier Colonel Abdul al-Rahman . After the invasion of America is repelled, the Ultimates then decide to go independent (as their actions in the Middle East inadvertently triggered the invasion). After this, Nick Fury would ask Cap to train the supposed mutant, Black Panther . He does so, but later finds out that Fury lied to him and that Fury has not let the Panther go home. With the help of Tony Stark, Steve makes himself a Black Panther disguise and joins the Ultimates as the Panther, allowing T'Challa to go home. Later in the Savage Lands while battling the Juggernaut, the rest of the team finds out that the Black Panther they know has been Cap the whole time, and they manage to defeat Ultron. When the ULTIMATUM Wave hits New York City, Cap is saved by Iron Man, but collapses and is taking to the Triskelion and put on life support. Cap later joins Thor in Valhalla, helping him fight Hela the goddess of death for Valkyrie's soul. Captain America ultimately survives the events of Ultimatum. Post-Ultimatum, Captain America and Hawkeye are on a mission when Cap runs into the Ultimate version of the Red Skull. They battle aboard a helicopter and Cap is quickly and brutally beaten by his adversary. Captain America later learns that this Skull is his son, but after the Skull secures a Cosmic Cube, Cap is forced to kill his own flesh and blood. Captain America would continue to lead the New Ultimates in various missions, including going against Fury's black ops Avengers team and a vampire invasion. After the death of Spider-Man, he goes into exile over his failure to properly train the young superhero, but is later recalled back with the emergence of the grassroots terrorist group HYDRA. Subsequently, Ultimate Cap would eventually be elected as a wartime President of the United States. Shortly after resigning from presidency, Captain America was killed during Galactus ' attack on New York. Ultimate Captain America can lift 2 to 4 tons, and is rated by his handbook strength as a 4, while his 616 counterpart is only a 3. Ultimate Captain America is classified as a superhuman, and he has shown enough strength to harm even powerful combatants like the Hulk and Juggernaut . His official bio states that he has mastered several martial arts, and has been shown to be able to defeat skilled fighters like Black Panther and Nuke . Ultimate Captain America is also considered a tactical genius, and has formulated many successful battle plans and strategies, and has also displayed intelligence levels that enable him to hack into classified S.H.I.E.L.D. files. In contrast to his mainstream universe counterpart, Ultimate Cap is willing to resort to any means in order to win, and will often improvise and use any strategy to triumph. He also has a low-level healing factor. As well, he is more likely to kill than the 616 version, and seems to dislike the French, as proven by his infamous quote, "You think this letter on my head stands for France!" His standard piece of equipment is a metallic shield designed by Hank Pym (later destroyed by Valkyrie but reforged by Asgardians), and his uniform has a vibranium chesplate and is Kevlar-lined to be bulletproof. Ultimate Cap also frequently makes use of firearms and explosives. Earth-8910 This Captain America is a rebuilt version of the original Cap, thanks to Stak Industries and Tony Stark. It has a computer inside which cooperates with his mind and works as a supporting device. Along with his traditional shield, he's armed with a pistol, with which he goes around to look for new foes to kill. Earth-9997 Earth-9997 Earth X Much of Captain America's past matches that of his Earth-616 counterpart; however recent insights into the past of the Captain America of Earth-9997 have been revealed by the studies made by X-51, Kyle Richmond, as well as Cap's own travels through Mar-Vell's cloak (which was once owned by the hero of the same name). At some point in his past, Cap was held prisoner of the Red Skull and an army of Neo-Nazis; during this encounter, the Red Skull claimed that Dr. Abraham Erskine was secretly a member of the Nazi party. The Red Skull went on to explain that Adolf Hitler had funded scientists to work for the Allies, so that their discoveries would aid the Axis powers. The secret plan of the Nazis for the super-soldier project was to create a perfect Aryan race, and as such, they picked Steve Rogers, a scrawny young man with blond hair and blue eyes. Red Skull also went on to explain that the assassin that killed Erskine was originally meant to kill Rogers after his birth, and that Erskine's death was not intended. The Red Skull's claims have not been substantiated, and could have possibly been used as mental torture. Since then, the Red Skull and his followers began worshiping Captain America as Hitler's "one true son", and the Skull himself began attacking people in Cap's personal life whom the Skull deemed "impure" or "unworthy" of Cap. At some point either prior to, or after the death of the Red Skull, Cap came into the possession of the Cosmic Cube once more. Knowing that he would be too tempted to use it, he turned it over to the only person he knew would not be tempted to use it, nor give it up to Cap no matter how much he begged for it: The Black Panther. World Wide Mutation At some point during the world wide mutation of humanity due to the release of Terrigen Mists into Earth's atmosphere, the Red Skull had tracked down and murdered Bernie Rosenthal, who was once the girlfriend of Captain America due to her brief association with Cap, and the Red Skull's belief that Captain America had to live up to Hitler's dream. The battle between Cap and the Red Skull following Bernie's death ended with Captain America decapitating the Red Skull with his shield. Following the Skull's death, Cap had vowed never to kill again. Soon after the Skull's death, Cap quit the Avengers because he felt that since he had killed the Red Skull out revenge that his continued membership would taint their ranks. Not long after, all the Avengers (except the Vision) were murdered by the Absorbing Man in Washington, D.C. As the world's population began to rapidly mutate and anarchy spread across the world, Cap joined up with S.H.I.E.L.D. around the time that world meat shortages began. Soon after his joining of S.H.I.E.L.D., members of its organization were succumbing to the alien Hydra (including the Falcon, Dum Dum Dugan, Sharon Carter, and She-Hulk among others). When Norman Osborn bought his way into the White House, Captain America refused to serve under him or fight along with the Iron Avengers, a group of robots created by Tony Stark for Osborn to act as guardians of the United States and fight off the invasion of the alien Hydra. Soon the S.H.I.E.L.D. Helicarrier was taken down by Hydra and S.H.I.E.L.D. director Nick Fury died in the crash. When Cap investigated the crashed helicarrier, he found a video on its main computer from Nick Fury warning that Osborn was behind the creation of the Hydra and that S.H.I.E.L.D. and Cap's friends were all targeted because Cap refused to work for Osborn. Eventually, Cap returned to New York City and partnered up with Red Wing (Wyatt Wingfoot) and the Iron Avengers, finally working for Osborn, plotting to take him down, but it never came to pass. Instead, during one of the Iron Avengers' routine sweeps through New York City to eliminate the Hydra hordes, Cap almost submitted to the members of Hydra's (all of whom were former friends of Cap) pleas to join the Hydra. When one of the Hydra approached with what appeared to be a cloth bearing the Punisher's old insignia but in red, Cap quickly rejected the Hydra's offer to join. After the Iron Avengers' seemingly eliminated the Hydra, Cap assumed that the symbol on the cloth was indication that the Red Skull had somehow returned. Soon, Cap and Red Wing traveled to the fallen S.H.I.E.L.D. helicarrier to see if its computers could locate any other sign of this red skull insignia and found a large concentration of the image on the west coast. Cap and Red Wing then traveled to the west in one of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s flying cars. In California, they found a large group of people (one of whom was Cap's old ally Marshall Maldoon) working under the banner, collecting fish from the ocean as a food source. This pillaging of the sea caught the attention of Namor, who attacked this group and he soon clashed with Iron Maiden. During the battle, he suddenly stopped and bowed down to their leader, who, to Cap's amazement was a teenage boy who went under the name of the Skull. It appeared that the Skull was able to make anyone in his vicinity his slave (it was later revealed that the Skull was in no way related to the Red Skull, but was really Benny Beckley, son of Comet Man. His powers were one of the many fail safes that was implemented into human DNA by the Celestials when they originally manipulated the human race, so at at time when all humans had mutated, one of their number could control them all and they could better defend the planet from invaders). Outraged by this form of slavery, Captain America and Red Wing confronted the Skull and demanded that he release the people that he controlled. The Skull found that Captain America was a laughing stock and took possession of Red Wing and had his masses attack Cap and drive him out of the vicinity. The Skull wanted Cap to be the only person free of his control, to mock the humbled hero. Cap, without a cause decided to remain on the west coast until he was approached by the Daredevil (not Matthew Murdock, but a freak show performer) who wanted to join Cap's cause because he figured it was a surefire way to die (Daredevil's mutation made it impossible for him to die). While Cap and Daredevil followed the Skull's progression across the United States, Cap had sent ahead Daredevil's circus companions to New York City to find Scott Summers (formally the X-Man, Cyclops) to train them to be the next X-Men. Added by Peteparker Upon arriving in New York City, Cap and Daredevil located the Thing asking him to aid in rallying a counter army to stop the Skull from taking over the world. Using the tuning fork once belonging to the Inhuman royal pet named Lockjaw, Cap first approached Tony Stark to assist in battling the Skull. Stark insisted that his Iron Avengers would stop the army. However, the Iron Avengers were destroyed and as a result, President Osborn was assassinated by the Skull. Cap traveled the world recruiting superhumans from around the globe to assist in battling the Skull. From Japan, he recruited Lord Sunfire and his Red Ronin army; Ka-Zar and Shanna the She-Devil from the Savage Land; from Russia, he recruited Czar Colossus, the Black Widow, the Crimson Dynamo and an army of Red Guardians; from Britain, Captain Britain, the Black Knight (secretly the son of Black Bolt), Dragon Man, and an army of Union Jacks, and finally Guardian and Sasquatch from Canada. When Cap and his army traveled to Wakanda seeking aid from the Black Panther, Cap also asked to be given the Cosmic Cube for use against the Skull. The Black Panther refused to aid Cap and stated that should the Skull's army make their way to Wakanda, he would deal with the invaders on his own. With his army, Cap returned to New York City and made an attack on the Skull and his army, and even with the added power of the Hulk and Bruce Banner, the Skull gained the upper hand by taking control of most of Cap's warriors. Even after his defeat, the Skull refused to possess Cap and had his troops beat Cap. Cap made one final desperate lunge at the Skull and just before he was killed by Marshall Maldoon, he was rescued by Spider-Man, who had finally decided to get involved in heroics once more in order to save his daughter, Venom, who was one of the Skull's slaves. The two heroes returned to the Thing's loft where they regrouped with the Thing, and the X-Men, and they formulated a plan. After their first battle with the Skull, Cap had noticed that the Skull was unable to take control of the Hulk, and could only control the beast once he took control of Bruce Banner. Cap also realized that the Skull destroyed the Iron Avengers as opposed to taking control of them and realized that the Skull had no control over the mindless, and so employed the use of the Marvels (life-sized clay sculptures of many of Earth's heroes in their prime that were created and given life by Alicia Masters, the wife of the Thing). The two heroes returned to the Thing's loft where they regrouped with the Thing, and the X-Men, and they formulated a plan. After their first battle with the Skull, Cap had noticed that the Skull was unable to take control of the Hulk, and could only control the beast once he took control of Bruce Banner. Cap also realized that the Skull destroyed the Iron Avengers as opposed to taking control of them and realized that the Skull had no control over the mindless, and so employed the use of the Marvels (life-sized clay sculptures of many of Earth's heroes in their prime that were created and given life by Alicia Masters, the wife of the Thing). Earth-2149 (Marvel Zombies) Earth-2149 Zombie Colonel America In the Marvel Zombies reality, Cap was known as Colonel America, and he was the President of the United States. After being turned into a zombie, he raided secret government bunkers and ate countless people until the zombie Red Skull killed him, by scooping his brains out. In Marvel Zombies 2, we see the return of Colonel America. A Frankenstein experiment carried out by the X-Man Forge, allowed the brain of Colonel America to be transplanted into the body of the Black Panther's son T'Channa. Earth-3010 Earth-3010 General America On Earth 3010, Steve Rogers was known as General America. This version of the character fought for an oppressive, fascistic version of the United States, with his arch nemesis being Lady Deadpool , the leader of the rebellion. Earth-460/Earth-311 Earth-311 1602 In Earth-460, the Purple Man had become president of the United States. He somehow sent Captain America to the year 1602 of an alternate reality, which created a divergent time-line designated Earth-311. In Earth-311 at the year 1602, Steve Rogers became Rojhaz, and joined an American Indian tribe. His arrival screwed up the time-line, and people started appearing in 1602 as analogues of themselves. Rojhaz didn't want to leave, so he could create a prejudice-free USA, but 1602 Nick Fury forced him to go back to normal time and bring everything back to normal. House of M Earth-58163 House of M In the House of M story line, Captain America (Steve Rogers) never got frozen in the ice-berg that kept him youthful in modern times. Instead, Steve Rogers continued to fight alongside the Invaders (Namor, Human Torch 1, Miss America and others) and protected the United States from all sorts of trouble and destruction. Steve Rogers gives up his mantle as Captain America after an argument with Senator McCarthy over the persecution of Mutants - particularly of Human Torch 1. He then joins the Space Program and becomes the first man to walk on the moon (changing Neil Armstrong's famous line to "One small step for man, one giant leap for for peace between man and mutant-kind). Although he marries Peggy Carter, they split up after an argument over Steve's stance on S.H.E.I.L.D and Mutant persecution. In the end, Steve retires from the service, and is accosted by a group of young mutants who beat him in a subway station. Earth-982 (MC 2 Universe) In the MC2 universe, Cap's origin and suspended animation was exactly the same. Once he had joined the MC2 Avengers, they went on a perilous mission that claimed most of their lives. Cap stayed behind to help others on the mission and was considered missing in action. Later, he gave American Dream his shield, as he saw in her the dedication he had when he was fighting. Steve was last seen leading the young superheroes against their superhero parents who were being mind-controlled by Loki . He was fatally injured, but in order to preserve his legacy, Thor used his power to immortalize him by turning him into a star resembling his shield to honor him. Earth-2301 (Mangaverse) In the Marvel Mangaverse, Captain America is both the leader of the Avengers and the president of the United States. He was killed by Doctor Doom. Carol Danvers (Ms Marvel in 616) becomes the new Cap. Earth-398 Earth-398 Cap Yeoman America was Captain America (Steve Rogers) altered by Morgan Le Fay's reality distortion wave. The wave caused the time period to be altered to a medieval setting altering the Avengers clothing, speech patterns and thought processes. All of the Avengers involved believed themselves to be a part of the Queen’s elite guard known as the Queen’s Vengeance. The Scarlet Witch, with the combined willpower of all the awakened Avengers, pumped power into Wonder Man, shifting reality back to normal, and defeated Morgan in the process. Earth-1298 (Mutant X) Steve Rogers was mentioned to be too busy to help mount an attack on the Goblin Queen by Quicksilver to Magneto. After he died, an unknown mutant took his place as Captain America. Captain America-X Steven Rogers never shows up in the Mutant X reality, though his mutant replacement is around quite a bit. Earth-9811 ( Battleworld ) In this reality, also called Battleworld , Captain America and Rogue had a daughter called Crusader. The daughter was called Sarah Rogers. Earth-9602 (Amalgam) In the Amalgam Universe, Captain America was merged with Superman. The new character was called Super-Soldier . Captain America(or rather Super-Soldier's) shield was replaced with Superman's logo, and is missing the top part of his mask piece, revealing his hair. (which is designed after Superman's hair). While this amalgam shared Superman's name, he also shared Captain America's backstory. Earth-8311 In the Larval Universe, Steve Rogers and his alter ego, Captain America, are turned into a cat named Steve Mouser and Captain Americat . He is working in the Daily Beagle (this universe's version of the Daily Bugle ). Earth-295 What If...? Age of Apocalypse In "What If both Professor X and Magneto was both killed by Legion ?", Captain America is the leader of the Defenders , which is composed of Weapon X , Captain Britain , Brother Voodoo , the Thing , Colossus , Sauron , Molecule Man and Nate Summers . The Defenders have learned the truth of their reality and have sworn not to change the past but defeat Apocalypse in the present. In this reality, Steve appears unmasked, wearing an eyepatch, and is in possession of Thor's hammer, Mjolnir along with his shield. After the team defeats Apocalypse in a climatic battle, Nate Summers betrays the team's oath and attempts time travel into the past to prevent Legion from killing Professor X and Magneto using Apocalypse's technology. Steve then fires lightning at Nate using Mjolnir, an act which, although killed Nate, also killed hundreds of others across the time portal and causing yet another version of the Age of Apocalypse reality. Earth-9939 In this reality Captain America leads the Avengers against Charnel and his "children". Very few people are still alive in this reality. In an effort to prevent it from coming to be in another world, Captain America and the Avengers travel to Earth-616, where they fight Death's Head II, believing him to be Charnel . When the real Charnel surfaces, the Avengers and DH II team up, and manage to defeat Charnel. Captain America is killed along with most of this reality's Avengers in the process. One of the final heroes fighting against Charnel. He led the last of his Avengers back to the past (specifically, Earth-616), to stop Charnel from gaining too much power. He was killed during the conflict. Earth-1720 In this reality Captain America is known as Captain Hydra. He's the warrior of Hand. In this world Hydra rules the world. Steven Rogers Earth 1081 Not much is known about the past history of Captain America on Earth-1081 presumably most of his history and origins are on par with most realities. It has been identified by Morph that during World War II, this version of Captain America served in his realities Invaders, where he would clash with the vampire lord Baron Blood. Eventually, in the modern era, Captain America would slay Baron blood. Also in the modern era, Captain America would be a member of the Avengers. Other Media Captain America TV movies Reb Brown as Captain America In 1979, two Captain America TV movies were produced for CBS. Captain America starred Reb Brown as the title character, with his origin updated to the 1970's rather than the 1940's. This version of Steve Rogers is a reluctant, somewhat whiny artist who has no interest in being a hero until he is injured in an accident. His life is saved by a dose of FLAG, a special serum created by his deceased father, which allows him to become Captain America. In the sequel, Captain America II: Death Too Soon , Cap battles a South American terrorist named General Miguel (played by Christopher Lee ). Captain America For further detail: Captain America Matt Sallinger as Captain America The film starts in 1936 when a fascist government kidnaps a talented boy from his family. The boy is needed for an experimental project to create a fascist super soldier; however, Dr. Vaselli (Carla Cassola) objects to using the boy, and under the cover of gunfire, flees. Seven years later, the American government finds a volunteer in Steve Rogers, a loyal all-American that is excluded from the draft because of his illness. The formula successfully transforms Rogers into the perfect solider. Before any more super soldiers can be created using the formula kept in her head, Dr. Vaselli is murdered by a Nazi spy. Meanwhile, the Italian boy has become the Red Skull and is planning to launch a missile at the White House. Now code named Captain America, he is sent in to defeat the Skull and deactivate the missile. However, after a brutal battle, the Red Skull tricks and defeats Captain America and ties him to the missile as it is about to launch. Cap is able to grab hold of the Red Skull, forcing him to cut off his hand in order to avoid being launched into destruction with Cap. While the missile is overhead, a young boy named Thomas Kimball takes a photograph as Cap forces the missile to change course and land, where he remains frozen until 1993. Kimball goes on to become an honest politician and Vietnam War hero until being elected the President. In 1993, a year into his term, he is pushing for pro-environmentalist legislation that is angering the military-industrial complex, who hold a secret conference led by the Red Skull. After the War, the Red Skull had extensive plastic surgery done in a partially successful attempt to alter his disfigured features, raised a daughter, and became the leader of a powerful crime family. In the 1960s, this American military-industrial complex hired the Red Skull and his thugs to murder various Americans who were against their militarism and Red Skull's fascism, such as Dr. Martin Luther King , President John F. Kennedy and Robert Kennedy . Now, Red Skull is targeting President Kimball for assassination. Cap's frozen body is found by researchers, and he awakens still thinking that it is the 1940s. After battling some of the Red Skull's thugs, he brushes off Sam Kolawetz (Ned Beatty), a reporter and childhood friend of President Kimball, and hitchhikes his way back to his wartime girlfriend, Bernice (Kim Gillingham), in the movie. While Bernice still lives at her old residence, she has long since married and raised her own daughter, Sharon. Sharon subsequently shows a series of VHS history tapes in order for Cap to catch up on what has happened while he was frozen in ice. Meanwhile, the Red Skull's thugs, lead by his daughter, break into Bernice's house and kill her. They also cause her husband to have a heart attack during their efforts to find where Cap is hiding out. Rogers and Sharon visit the secret underground base where he gained his superpowers, in the hopes that Dr. Vaselli's diary is still there and contains the original name of the Red Skull. Although Rogers and Sharon find the diary, the Red Skull's thugs attempt to grab it. Rogers and Sharon vow revenge as well as the rescue of the recently kidnapped president. They locate and travel to the Red Skull's home and discover an old recording of the murder of his parents. Sharon agrees to be kidnapped in order to allow Steve Rogers, who once again dons his costume, to enter the Red Skull's castle. In the midst of their battle, the Red Skull pulls out a remote trigger for an explosive device, but Cap knocks him off a cliff with his trademark shield before the bomb can be set off. The United States Marines show up to save the President and arrest the Americans involved in the kidnapping. The credits roll with a comic book image of Captain in the background and a plea to support the United States Environmental Protection Act of 1990. The Incredible Hulk (2008) Cap's frozen body A deleted scene in The Incredible Hulk shows Captain America's still-frozen body. After Bruce Banner attempts to commit suicide, he transforms into the Hulk and goes on a rampage, destroying the surrounding area. When this occurs, Captain America's shadowy form can briefly be seen trapped in the ice. The scene was cut from the movie's theatrical release, but was included on the DVD. Captain America: The First Avenger (2011) Chris Evans as Captain America in CA:TFA In Captain America: The First Avenger , Steve Rogers (played by Chris Evans ) is a young man with a great will and attitude to do his part for his country. He continuously tries to join the Army and is continuously rejected for various health and physical issues. When he attended the Stark World Expo, on a double date with his friend James Barnes , his date is not happy with him because of his weak appearance. He tries to enlist again, and for the first time he is allowed to by Dr.Abraham Erskine, who overheard the conversation between Steve and Bucky and the good heart and will that Steve has. He is recruited into Project: Rebirth, a super soldier experiment to win the war. General Phillips is not happy with Erskine's choice in Steve being the right person for this procedure. The night before the procedure, Steve gets an unexpected meeting from Erskine, who reveals to him about Johann Schmidt, the first super soldier, who went through an imperfect version of the serum and gained super-human abilities but also suffered side-effects, as well as revealing that a "Strong man who has known power all his life, loses the respect for that power, but a weak man knows the value of strength and knows compassion." Steve goes through the treatment and transforms into a much stronger and taller human being, a Super Solider. The USO costume After this procedure Erskine is killed by an assassin of Schimdt's, Heinz Kruger . Steve chases and captures the assassin, who commits suicide before an actual interrogation. Rather than use him on the battlefield he is toured across the nation to promote war bonds as " Captain America ", since he is the last and only success of the Super Soldier Serum . While on one of his tours, Steve learns of Barnes unit being lost in battle. Refusing to believe he is dead Steve goes on a solo rescue mission with the help of Peggy Carter and Howard Stark . Steve infiltrates the Hydra base and frees the captured soldiers alongside Barnes. He eventually confronts Schmidt, who reveals his true face, which a red colored disfigured and skull like. After the rescue Steve recruits Barnes, Dugan , Jones , Morita , Falsworth and Dernier to attack known Hydra bases. He is provided with an upgraded suit, that he designed, and a new circular shield made of Vibranium . They attack a Hydra train to capture Arnim Zola , but lose Barnes. Steve later on leads an attack on Schimdt's base. He jumps on board Schimdt's secret weapon, and confronts him. During their fight Steve damages the container of the Tesseract . In doing this, Schimdt for the first time grabs the Tesseract, which causes him to vanish into a bright light. Steve seeing no safe way to land the plane. with the bombs and weapons on board, makes a a daring decision to crash the plane into the Arctic. He does just that, and begins his 70-year time in suspended animation. He remains frozen until the present day, when he is found. He is taken and awakens in a hospital room. He quickly figures out something is wrong, because of the baseball game in the radio. He flees out of the room into a present New York, which takes him by surprise and is confronted by Nick Fury who informs Steve that he was asleep for almost 70 years. When Fury asked if he was going to be OK, Steve in a sad tone replies "I had a date ". The Avengers (2012) Chris Evans as Captain America Chris Evans reprises his role as Captain America in The Avengers. Steve Rogers finds himself lost in a new world, after his defrosting. He recounts various memories of his life in the 1940s and World War 2, while he is working out in a boxing gym. Nick Fury approaches him with mission to save the world again. He is informed about Loki and how he stole the Tesseract , to conquer Earth, to which Steve is not thrilled to learn about especially the Tesseract, Hydra's secret weapon and power source. Even though he accepts the mission, he tells Fury "you should have left it in the ocean", when asked about any important information on the Tesseract. Aboard the Quinjet , Steve is debriefed on each member of the Avengers Initiative , and one in particular intrigues him, Bruce Banner . He was informed by Agent Coulson that Banner tried to recreate the Super Soldier Serum , which he believed low levels of Gamma Radiation to be the key. On board the Helicarrier , he gives Nick Fury 10 bucks, since he was wrong about how much the world has changed. SHIELD later learns of Loki's location, Germany, Captain America and Black Widow are sent in to apprehend him. While Loki is about to kill an old man, Captain America intervenes and battles Loki, to which Loki has the upper hand even though Cap is not giving up, eventually Loki gives up, after the intervention of Iron Man. While escorting Loki to SHIELD, Steve is uncomfortable over how easy it was to capture him, but before he could go any further they are interrupted by the arrival of Thor , who has come to earth to take his brother and the Tesseract back to Asgard . While Thor and Iron Man are battling each other on the ground, Rogers gets ready to jump off the Quinjet, to which Natasha informs him is a dangerous idea because of them being Gods and far more powerful than he is, to which he replies "There's only one God ma'am, and I don't think he looks like that!". He stops the fight between Tony and Thor, but angers Thor to attack him, to no avail because of Rogers shield . On board the Helicarrier the team listens to the conversation between Fury and Loki. Rogers discovers that SHIELD has possession of Hydra tech from World War Two and information on Phase 2, to create weapons of mass destruction powered by the Tesseract just like Hydra, which turns into an argument over the roles of each member and Tony's characteristic as a hero, leading them to be oblivious about the attack on the Helicarrier. While the Hulk is rampaging inside the Helicarrier and Thor is trying to stop him, Steve and Tony try to restart one of the Helicarrier engines. Even though they succeed they end up losing an Agent , as well as Loki escaping his captivity. Tony and Steve devise a plan to take on Loki, and the battle in New York begins. With the arrival of the Hulk, the Avengers take on the horde of Chitauri that is entering through the portal that has opened on top of Stark tower. After the capture of Loki, Thor takes him and the Tesseract back to Asgard, and the Avengers go their separate ways. Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014) Captain America in the sequel Chris Evans reprises his role again in the 2014 film Captain America: The Winter Soldier . Set two years after the Chitauri invasion of New York, the movie sees Rogers now working as an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. alongside Black Widow. When his old friend Bucky emerges as the brainwashed assassin Winter Soldier and a conspiracy within S.H.I.E.L.D. is discovered, Cap goes on the run and recruits the Falcon as his new partner. The heroes discover that Bucky is working for HYDRA, who have infiltrated S.H.I.E.L.D. and are planning to conquer the world by using three new Helicarriers . Cap and Falcon manage to bring down the Helicarriers while Black Widow exposes HYDRA's plans to the public. The movie ends with Bucky rescuing Cap and disappearing to parts unknown, with Cap and Falcon resolving to track him down. Avengers: Age of Ultron Captain America in the Avengers sequel Chris Evans returns as Captain America once again in the 2015 movie Avengers: Age of Ultron . He sports yet another new costume, as well as a magnetic gauntlet that allows him to control the shield in mid-flight. After the events of The Winter Soldier, Steve has returned to the Avengers in order to help take down the remaining HYDRA cells. He repeatedly clashes with Iron Man throughout the film due to the two heroes' vastly differing ideas on how best to protect the planet. After several of the original members leave the team, the film ends with Captain America and Black Widow preparing to lead a new team of Avengers consisting of War Machine , Vision , Falcon and Scarlet Witch , acting as a nod to the "Cap's Kooky Quartet" period from the comics. Ant-Man Chris Evans makes a cameo appearance as Captain America in Ant-Man . In a short post-credits scene, Captain America and Falcon are shown with the Winter Soldier, whose arm is trapped in some sort of vise. When Cap states that they cannot call Iron Man or the Avengers for assistance, Falcon mentions that Scott Lang may be able to help them out. C aptain America: Civil War (May 6 2016) Civil War Chris Evans returns once again as Captain America in Captain America: Civil War . The film opens up a year after Age of Ultron, with Cap still leading the New Avengers. After a disastrous mission in Lagos, Nigeria results in civilian casualties, the nations of the world craft the Sokovia Accords, a series of laws designed to regulate and control the Avengers. Steve opposes the laws, arguing that they could lead to the governments using the Avengers for political agendas. The situation is complicated when Bucky is framed for a terrorist attack in Vienna, with the Avengers not being authorized to bring him in. After Cap and Falcon violate the Accords by trying to bring in Bucky themselves, the Avengers opposed to the Accords become fugitives hunted by Iron Man and his team of heroes. The film ends with a violent confrontation between Cap and Iron Man, which Cap ultimately wins. He relinquishes his shield and goes on the run, and is last seen hiding out in Wakanda . Video Games Spider-Man and Captain America in Doctor Doom's Revenge Captain America is one of the two playable characters in this game, where he and Spider-Man battle a host of supervillains led by Doctor Doom. Captain America and The Avengers Captain America and The Avengers Captain America is one of the four playable Avengers in this game, alongside Iron Man, Hawkeye, and the Vision. Marvel vs Capcom series Marvel vs. Capcom Captain America is a playable fighter in this series of Japanese fighting games. He appears in Marvel Super Heroes vs. Street Fighter, Marvel vs. Capcom: Clash of Super Heroes, Marvel vs. Capcom 2: New Age of Heroes, and Marvel vs. Capcom 3: Fate of Two Worlds. He was voiced by Cathal J. Dodd until Marvel vs. Capcom 3, where he was voiced by Brian Bloom. Captain America in: The Doom Tube of Doctor Meglomann Captain America appeared as the protagonist in this, which was his first solo game. Spider-Man and Venom: Separation Anxiety Captain America appears in this game. Avengers in Galactic Storm Captain America appears as a playable fighter in this Japanese fighting game from Data East, which is loosely based on the Operation: Galactic Storm crossover. Marvel: Ultimate Alliance Cap in M:UA Captain America is a playable character, and one of the four stars, alongside Thor, Spider-Man, and Wolverine. In the beginning, he and the other three are summoned by Nick Fury to combat the Masters of Evil, who are attacking the S.H.I.E.L.D helicarrier. While one can play as any hero available, Cap still appears in all the cutscenes - including the ones of higher quality (except "Doom's Day). Marvel: Ultimate Alliance 2 Cap in M:UA 2 Captain America is a playable character and leads the Anti-Registration side. As M:UA 2 adapts the Secret War and Civil War storylines, Cap's role is similar to his role in said storylines. Cap, Wolverine, and Spidey are once again summoned by Nick Fury with a mission (Iron Man takes Thor's place) - this time to take down Lucia von Bardas. One year later, Lucia has her revenge, and begins setting the stage for the Civil War part of the arc, where Cap becomes leader of the Anti-Registration side. Captain America: Super Soldier Captain America fights through Baron Zemo's castle in the movie adaptation. Marvel Heroes Marvel Heroes In the Free To Play MMO game Marvel Heroes, Captain America is one of the characters that can be purchased by the player. Several famous costumes can be purchased as well, like the Captain America: Reborn, Commander Steve Rogers and The Captain costumes Marvel Avengers Alliance Captain America is playable in this Facebook game. Contest of Champions WWII Cap vs. Iron Patriot Captain America appears as a playable fighter. An alternate version of Captain America in his costume from Captain America: The First Avenger dubbed "WWII Captain America" was later released as a special promo for the 4th of July. Disney Infinity Disney Infinity Captain America is a playable hero in the Marvel Super Heroes expansion pack, voiced by Roger Craig Smith. A new version of Cap in his Captain America: Civil War costume was later released for Disney Infinity 3.0. Marvel Future Fight X-Men: The Animated Series Captain America and Logan go way back Captain America made an appearance in the X-Men episode "Old Soldiers", which involved Cap and Wolverine fighting side-by-side in World War II. He was voiced by Lawrence Bayne. Spider-Man: The Animated Series Captain America appeared in several episodes of Spider-Man: The Animated Series . He was first seen in a flashback in the episode "The Cat", before making a proper appearance in the "Six Forgotten Warriors" and "Secret Wars" storylines. He was voiced by David Hayter. X-Men: Evolution Cap's frozen body Like the previous series, an episode of X-Men: Evolution was devoted to showing the previous cooperation between the two. However, it goes further, explaining the Captain's absence and related to the plot when Magneto sought the physical abilities of the hero. Cap is the only superhero who is not a member of the X-Men or a mutant in general and still makes and appearance. Avengers: United They Stand Cap with the Avengers Captain America appeared in the opening credits of Avengers: United We Stand in every episode, as did Iron Man and Thor. However, Cap was not a member of the actual team; it was the same case with the former two. Whereas Thor never appeared out side the opening credits, Iron Man and Cap did make at least one appearance each. In Cap's case, he appeared in the sixth episode, "Command Decision", where he helps the Avengers defeat the Masters of Evil. He was voiced by Dan Chameroy. Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes Avengers: EMH Captain America has a much larger role in the second, more-acclaimed series, Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes , voiced by Brian Bloom. Much like his 616 counterpart, Captain America served in WWII and was thought dead after his final mission. He attempted to disable a bomb launched by the Red Skull, and the resulting explosion threw him into Arctic waters, where he froze and remained in suspended animation for decades. Captain America was eventually found by the Avengers (who were searching for a rogue Hulk). After fighting his own WWII enemy Baron Zemo, as well as Arnim Zola and his creation Doughboy , Captain America would then join the Avengers. He served as a loyal member of the Avengers in their missions during this time. Him and the rest of the Avengers aided Black Panther in reclaiming Wakanda , defeated Zemo's Masters of Evil, and Captain America also helped Hawkeye in his unsanctioned attack on HYDRA Island. But Captain America was the inadvertent cause of one of the Avengers' biggest threats when Kang the Conqueror traveled to the 21st century to kill Cap. He claimed that Cap was an anomaly in the space-time continuum, and that Captain America's betrayal would eventually lead to the destruction of Earth. Kang would eventually be defeated, but his claims would have repercussions in the next season. Captain America meanwhile, continued to adjust to 21st century life; teaching Iron Man how to fight without his armor and getting used to the J.A.R.V.I.S. AI and the Quinjet . The Avengers also went up against both A.I.M. and HYDRA, who were fighting over a Cosmic Cube created by the former. During the battle, Captain America wrestled with Baron von Strucker (leader of HYDRA) for the Cube, and they both touched it at the same time. While it seemed as though nothing happened, the Cube secretly worked - fulfilling Cap's truest desire - resurrecting his dead sidekick Bucky who was killed in the bomb's explosion during WWII. Subsequently, Cap would fight with the rest of the Avengers against Ultron, Malekith the Accursed , and Loki with the power of Odin. At the end of the first season, Captain America was ambushed by a Skrull shapeshifter in his room, who announced that the invasion had begun. At the start of the second season, Captain America started wearing an energy shield designed by Tony, to replace the shield he had lost when Odinforce Loki destroyed it. In one crucial mission, Baron Zemo, Crimson Dynamo , Wonder Man , and Abomination sought the aid of the Avengers to defeat Enchantress and Executioner (who were hunting down their former teammates). Zemo placed Captain America in charge of the plan to disable Enchantress' power because he knew he could trust Cap, but as the Skrull shapeshifter was masquerading in Cap's place, 'Captain America' betrayed Zemo. This was one of the hints that Cap had been replaced. Later on, when Iron Man receives intel that a member of his team is a Skrull shapeshifter, the team fractures in distrust and breaks apart. Only Captain America, Hulk, Wasp, and Hawkeye remained together. As his Skrull impersonator continued to lead the team, the real Captain America was being tortured and held in a Skrull spaceship. They were trying to figure out how to break him, so as to learn how to defeat humanity, but failed to do so. Instead, Cap was able to engineer an escape, and temporarily teamed up with all of the superheroes and villains who were captured and impersonated - Madame Viper , Mockingbird , Agent Quartermain , Cobra , Henry Gyrich , Invisible Woman , and an A.I.M. grunt. Together, the group made an escape, hijacking a Skrull craft back to Earth and subduing Super-Skrull . Back on Earth, the fake Captain America gave the order for the Skrull fleet to begin infiltrating Wakanda and Washington, D.C. The Skrulls had realized that they shouldn't try to defeat humanity, but use 'Captain America' to convince them. Back on Earth, the team is finally reassembled together after initial misunderstandings, and the Skrull invasion begins. Super-Skrulls are used to subdue the Avengers, and the Cap impersonator goes on live TV to try to subdue the human race by telling them to embrace the Skrull Empire (thus fulfilling Kang's claim that Cap's betrayal would end the world). But the real Cap returns, and together with the Avengers (Iron Man figured out how to reveal Skrull disguises as well), they defeat the invasion. Captain America successfully defeats his impersonator, though his reputation has been ruined in the fallout. As a result of his Skrull impersonator, the public turns against Cap and brands him a traitor. But after a mission with Spider-Man where they saved a group of innocents, the Daily Bugle clears his name. Cap would then go on to fight in several other missions (facing off against the Vision, the Loki-Destroyer, Annihilus, and a Purple-Man controlled Iron Man) but his past would come back to haunt him when Senator Dell Rusk (secretly the Red Skull) attacks the team. The team was comprised of conditioned heroes, including the Winter Soldier - who was actually Bucky. Bucky and Cap eventually reconcile, though after defeating Red Skull and his Sleepers , the two go their separate ways. After getting Hulk back on the team, the Avengers would then go on to fight the Kree Empire and the Supreme Intelligence, with the aid of Captain Marvel. The last episode of the series would also have the Avengers and all superheroes go up against Galactus and his heralds. In the final scene of the series, Galactus is defeated and the crowd cheers on as Captain America tells Iron Man, "You wanted to know how history will remember the Avengers, Iron Man? Well, here's your answer." Captain America has the Super-Soldier Serum in his veins, granting him peak human conditioning. He also had his indestructible shield. Ultimate Spider-Man The Ultimate version of Captain America appears in Ultimate Spider-Man as a member of the Avengers. He teams up with Spider-Man to retrieve his shield in the episode "Not A Toy" and then teams up with Wolverine and Spidey to defeat Arcade in the episode "Game Over". He is voiced by Roger Craig Smith in the show. Avengers Assemble Ultimate Cap The Ultimate version of Captain America appears as one of the main characters in the animated series Avengers Assemble . Though his costume resembles his Ultimate counterpart, his personality is more in line with the classic Captain America. He frequently clashes with Iron Man over their differences, and acts as a friend and mentor to the Falcon, the youngest member of the Avengers. Roger Craig Smith reprises his role from Ultimate Spider-Man, with a performance largely based off Chris Evan's portrayal of Cap. Marvel Disk Wars: The Avengers Captain America and Chris Captain America appears as one of the main characters in Marvel Disk Wars: The Avengers , a Japanese anime series by Toei Animation. He sports an armored design in contrast to his sleeker comic costume. This version is one of the few remaining Avengers after most of the world's heroes are captured by Loki, and is partnered with a teenage boy named Chris. He is voiced by Yasuyuki Kase. Live Performance Marvel Universe LIVE! Marvel LIVE Cap Captain America appears as a main character in the traveling stage show. He sports a costume similar to what he wears in the Ultimate comics and the Avengers Assemble TV show. Due to the stunt-based nature of the show, many of Captain America's action scenes involve his motorcycle. Merchandise Early merchandise Mego's Captain America Captain America has been a staple of Marvel toy lines for decades, going all the way back to the first superhero figures put out by Mego. During the 1980's, he was featured in the original Secret Wars line by Mattel. He was a mainstay in many of the toylines put out by Toy Biz, such as their Marvel Super Heroes line from the 90's. As time went on, he received many other figures, such as from the Marvel Legends line and the short-lived Avengers: United They Stand line. When the Marvel license was later procured by Hasbro, Captain America continued to appear. He also appeared in numerous other lines such as Diamond's Mini-Mates and Marvel Select lines. Movies onward Figma Captain America figure After his MCU debut with Captain America: The First Avenger, he received his own line of action figures based off the film. This trend continued for the movie's two sequels, Captain America: The Winter Soldier and Captain America: Civil War. The character's popularity in film has also led to other companies making merchandise based off the films. For instance, the Japanese companies Max Factory and Bandai Tamashii produced Captain America figures based off his appearances in The Avengers and Avengers: Age of Ultron, respectively. Taiwanese company Hot Toys has produced figures for each of Captain America's film appearances as well, and the character has also appeared in other lines the company has put out. Since gaining the license, Lego has also put out several Captain America minifigs as part of their sets. He was featured in their lines for The Avengers, the Avengers Assemble cartoon, and Avengers: Age of Ultron. The character will also be getting his own line of kits for Captain America: Civil War. Statues Kotobukiya's Avengers statues Captain America has also been a popular subject for statues, done by various companies like Bowen Designs, Sideshow Collectibles, Gentle Giant and Kotobukiya. Busts of the character have also been created by many of the same companies. Replicas Gear by Hasbro The character's iconic shield has also been a popular subject for toy makers. Various replicas of varying quality and price range have been put out, with a large number released alongside the movies. Helmet and mask replicas have also been sold. Captain America is also a popular choice for Halloween costumes, especially among children. Board Games Captain America is a playable character in the base game of Upper Deck's Marvel Legendary. Novels Captain America: Liberty's Torch The trial of Captain America! Captured by a vicious militia group called Liberty's Torch, Cap is put on trial for the imagined crimes of America. Forced to defend himself in a hostile courtroom with no hope of a fair trail, the star-spangled Avenger faces his greatest challenge as his ideals are put to the acid test. Written By: T. Isabella

Bucky

Have raised over $1.46 billion to date, Jerry Lewis' annual Labor Day telethon raises money for what group?

Bucky Barnes (Character) - Comic Vine Bucky Barnes Character » Bucky Barnes appears in 1673 issues . Believed dead near the end of World War II only to have been found and brainwashed by the Soviets for the next 50 years, Captain America's former sidekick now continues to defend his country from the shadows against those who would threaten it as legendary spy and assassin, the Winter Soldier. He became the new Captain America to honor his friend Steve and he joined the Avengers. When Steve returned as Captain America, Bucky took on the identity of the Winter Soldier once again. The Bucky Barnes wiki last edited by KWTitan12 on 10/20/16 10:28AM View full history Origin Captain America and Bucky After losing his father at a young age during World War II , James Buchanan Barnes was adopted as the mascot for Camp Lehigh and nicknamed "Bucky". Because of his skills Bucky was sent to England on his sixteenth birthday, where he went through two months of combat training with the British S.A.S. and another month of special training back in the United States. To his superiors Bucky was the best natural fighter they had ever seen. It wasn't long before he was made Captain America 's partner, who unlike Cap could get his hands dirty doing the little tricks that Cap wasn't allowed to do because of regular military methods. The press then came up with a cover story: "Camp kid becomes Cap's sidekick," which made kids all over the country think it could happen to them too. He soon joined Cap as a member of the Invaders , fighting alongside such other heroes as Namor the Sub-Mariner, Jim Hammond the Human Torch and Thomas Raymond the Toro . As they were about the same age, Bucky and Toro would become close friends, along with the Human Top and Golden Girl , who dubbed themselves "The Kid Commandos". During this time he teamed up with other sidekicks to form the Young Allies and later the Liberty Legion to help the Invaders in their fight against the Red Skull . Bucky also teamed-up with a group of teenage superheroes called the Kid Commandos . In the closing days of World War II, during a mission overseas to take down Baron Heinrich Zemo , Cap and Bucky hopped on a plane carrying a bomb and hoping to disarm it. Cap couldn't reach it but Bucky hung on. It was booby trapped and the bomb detonated. Bucky found himself too close to the explosion which sent him and Captain America falling into the waters below. While Captain America's body was frozen in a state of suspended animation for years, Bucky's body was never found... Or was it? Creation Joe Simon and Jack Kirby created Bucky Barnes as a sidekick for Captain America, named after a childhood friend of Joe Simon's. He first appeared in Captain America Comics #1 in March 1941. Character Evolution Bucky has been through some drastic changes in his career. Golden Age Bucky was a major feature of the Golden Age of comics as Captain America's sidekick, although the decline in superhero comics in the late 1940's saw him replaced by Betsy Ross (Golden Girl) as Captain America's partner. A brief revival in the early 50's sadly fizzled and the character was left dormant after Captain America #78 in September 1954. Silver Age When Captain America returned in the pages of the Avengers #4, the first retcon was made to Bucky's history, revealing that he and Captain America met their fatal end at the close of World War II in an airplane explosion, and that subsequent appearances of the two were actually stand-in heroes posing as Cap and Bucky. However, despite Captain America returning as a mainstream Marvel hero, Bucky was left apparently permanently dead for many years to the extent that it was assumed he would never be revived (a la Spider-Man 's Uncle Ben ). Instead, Bucky appeared in flashbacks and in tales of his and Cap's World War II history together (for example in The Invaders series). Modern Age Ed Brubaker finally brought Bucky back to real life when he restored him in another retcon, this time showing how he had become the Winter Soldier. This path has since led to Bucky replacing Steve Rogers as Captain America in the Marvel Universe. Major Story Arcs The Winter Soldier Bucky as Winter Soldier In April 1945, an experimental Soviet spy-submarine helmed by Comrade Karpov was crossing the English Channel when it intercepted a transmission claiming that Captain America and Bucky had been blown up. Not far from the area, the sub quickly charted the depths and discovered Bucky's tattered body, his left arm completely torn off. Apparently flash-frozen in the waters, the Soviets slowly increased his temperature to thaw out his tissues. After administering electricity, CPR and adrenaline directly into his heart, Bucky was brought back from the dead. While he had no memory of his previous life, Bucky demonstrated a remarkable ability: reflex memories. He knew how to fight, and how to speak four languages, but had no clue how he knew all this. Fitting him with a cybernetic arm, the Soviets began work on the Winter Soldier Project. They began mental implantation to reprogram his mind and make him loyal to no one but the Soviets. With the codename Winter Soldier, the former Bucky was sent out on spy missions to blend in with his surroundings and assassinate various Cold War power-players. After acting oddly on a few missions, Bucky served as a body guard to the professor behind the Winter Soldier project for a few years before the Soviets decided to store the Winter Soldier away in a suspended state until needed again, keeping his mind from learning the truth. Bucky's memory loss was so severe that even after killing a number of subjects including Red Skull and Nomad under the direction of Karpov's protégée, Aleksander Lukin , the Winter Soldier came face to face with Captain America and still did not remember his past at all. Under orders from Lukin, Bucky is told to bring the newly obtained Cosmic Cube to a safe location. However, using A.I.M. technology Captain America and Falcon are able to track Bucky down and after a close battle, resulting in Captain America obtaining the all-powerful Cosmic Cube . Cap held the Cube and made one short statement to the Winter Soldier: "Remember who you are." As the memories flooded back to him, the Winter Soldier couldn't handle it and destroyed the Cube, vanishing with it. Although the rest believe Bucky to be dead as a result of the splash damage from the cube, Captain America believed that he was alive, referring to Bucky as a "fighter". This is indeed true, as Bucky is revealed to have been teleported by the cube to his old air base where he first met Steve Rogers . He soon found an ally in Nick Fury , another WWII legend who has also gone 'off the map'. Fury equipped Bucky with the Intel and equipment (including an improved cybernetic arm) needed to remain a key player behind the scenes of the Marvel Universe. Bucky is unable to accept what he has become Confused, angry and still reeling from shock of Steve's death, Bucky looked for a way to strike back. After getting into a bar fight and being the only man left standing Bucky decides that the only way to strike back is to kill Tony Stark, blaming him for the death of Steve Rogers. He stole Cap's shield during a transfer between two S.H.I.E.L.D. holding areas. This leads him to a confrontation with Natasha Romanov aka Black Widow , who is revealed to also be an old flame of his. Bucky is able to defeat Natasha with ease, having trained her, and goes on to ambush the Red Skull, who is revealed to be alive and currently sharing a mind with Lukin . Bucky succeeds in infiltrating Lukin's office and defeating both Crossbones and Sin but before he can pull the trigger Lukin speaks the word "sputnik" (a word implanted in him to shut him down during his time as the Winter Soldier) which causes Bucky to be unconscious and only to be temporarily taken prisoner. Bucky is taken to be brainwashed by Dr. Faustus so he can be used by the Red Skull but Bucky manages to escape and attempts to rescue Sharon Carter who unknown to him is under Faustus control. Bucky is taken on-board a ship where Faustus attempts to escape from the coming S.H.I.E.L.D units and the Falcon who is in close pursuit. Gaining momentary sanity Sharon throws Bucky overboard knowing that the Falcon will save him and allowing him to be held by S.H.I.E.L.D custody. The New Captain America Captain America Returns! Steve Rogers left instructions for Tony Stark in a letter written before his death to "save" Bucky and that the mantle of Captain America should go on. After the murder of Steve Rogers, the man who was Captain America, Cap's former partner during World War II, James "Bucky" Barnes, agreed to don the mantle. And even as he struggles with the sins he committed as the Winter Soldier - the Soviet mercenary he was brainwashed into becoming during the Cold War - the new Captain America finds his past as both Bucky and the Winter Soldier colliding with his present. When the Winter Soldier (Bucky) was brought into S.H.I.E.L.D. custody, he managed to escape. His cybernetic arm had been removed and was being examined by S.H.I.E.L.D. scientists. They were surprised at how much of their own design was in place. Either the Russians had a mole in S.H.I.E.L.D. or the Winter Soldier was working for Nick Fury. The arm sent out an electrical shock to one scientist, rose up and knocked out the other two. It then crawled up the wall and into a ventilation shaft to seek out it's owner. When the Winter Soldier was free his only goal was to attack Iron Man. The two fought to a standstill until Stark mentioned the letter from Steve. Bucky wasn't sure that Cap had meant for him to actually become Captain America. Tony said that there's no way Bucky would let anyone else fill those boots and asked if he wanted to be the one to let Steve down. Bucky said he'd do it under two conditions. The first was that his mind was completely probed to ensure there was no trace of brainwashing or fail safe code-words left over from when he was under control was the Winter Soldier. The second condition is that he doesn't have to answer to S.H.I.E.L.D. or to Stark, just as Steve didn't. Tony thought about it and agreed. Bucky donned his own new Captain America costume as he did not feel right wearing Steve's. On his first mission Bucky with Black Widow at his side fight an A.I.M radical group to which he easily defeats. He is later confronted while training with the shield by Clint Barton aka Hawkeye who does not approve of him being the new Captain America. Clint attempts to fight Bucky who merely blocks his attacks. Upon learning that they were basically thought the same moves Clint departs warning Bucky not to let the name of Captain America down. After the revealing of a jaded former Captain America Bucky goes to confront him despite being told by the Falcon not to. Bucky sneaks into a room to find information only to be taken by surprise by this Cap and is punched through a wall. The Captain America from the 1950s is able to defeat Bucky resulting in him getting thrown of a building but saved by the Falcon just in time. The two later knowing that the red skull will want to retrieve the 50s Cap use him as bait to gain the location of the Red Skulls base. A New Avenger Joining the New Avengers Since becoming Captain America, Bucky has stopped the Red Skull's plans and saved the Democratic and Republican presidential candidates, winning public applause. He also restarted his relationship with the Black Widow and joined the New Avengers , giving them a new hideout. James later participates in the search for Luke and Jessica's child, Danielle. When the New Avengers find out about Norman Osborn's "Avengers" James and the rest of the team try to think of a way to show that world that Osborn is still as evil as ever. They send in Spider-Woman to try and join Norman's Avengers into a trap, but Norman figures out this plan and sends The Hood and his gang to try and take the New Avengers down, the Avengers make their way out of the ambush and try to think of a new plan. One night Bucky was up late talking to Black Widow about what he did as the Winter Soldier, Widow kept telling him that it wasn't his fault, he went out to think but ran into Batroc, they fought but Bucky was defeated. Later, he and Widow went to the U.N. to find some answers, but discover that the U.N. is covering something up. Bucky then goes to the black market to find answers, learning that the U.N. would be transporting something the next day. The next day Bucky ran into Batroc again trying to steal what ever the U.N. was transporting, they began to fight, then The Man With No Face jumped into the fight, Bucky defeated Batroc, but even with the help from Black Widow, The Man With No Face got away with what was left of the Original Human Torch. James teams up with Namor and goes after The Man with No Face and Professor Chin (the man who created The Man with No Face), while Black Widow works on getting more info on this Professor Chin. Cap and Namor use Namor's old ship to sneak into Professor Chin's base and they split up but Namor is captured. James then changes into his old Winter Soldier uniform and makes his way through the base, Professor Chin begins to experiment on Namor while Black Widow makes her way to Namor's ship and sees that James is not wearing his Captain America uniform. James breaks into Chin's lab and orders Chin to let Namor go, but The Man with No Face attacks James. During the battle Chin injects Namor with some kind of chemical, but Namor is unaffected because of him Mutant-Human gene. Black Widow then joins in the fight and helps James beat The Man with No Face, as well as helps both James and Namor to escape. While on their way home, Namor mentions how good of a team James and Natalia make. Back home Namor, Norman Osborn, and others put the Human Torch to rest and James later comes to grave to pay his respects to an old friend. On his birthday, Bucky was on patrol above the streets of New York City, when he was suddenly attacked by a group of rocket men. As he ran across the rooftops, dodging heat-seeking missiles in the process, he was able to get a picture of his attackers and sent it to Clint Barton , asking Barton to find out who these guys were and why they were trying to kill him. While this was happening Bucky started to remember other birthdays he's had over the years, the first of which involved him getting into a fight after getting drunk on his 16th birthday. Next was his 18th birthday when, during which Toro tried to get him a cake and accidentally gave away their position to the Nazis, whom the group had to fight off. In 1945, when he turned 20, Bucky spent his birthday helping Steve interrogate a German spy. During his time as Winter Soldier he didn't celebrate any birthdays. Clint Barton was able to find out that Bucky's attackers were members of a militia group called the Watchdogs , a team of so-called patriots who claimed to worship Captain America. As Bucky fought The Watchdogs, he saved a lady and her child from one of the rogue missiles. After taking down two of the men out with his shield, Bucky shot the third, after which he questions the man on why they are trying to kill him. The Watchdog responds by telling him that he he isn't the real Captain America. Bucky then tells the militiaman he knows, but that he is trying. When he returned home, Bucky was surprised by a birthday party that Black Widow and the New Avengers had made for him. Captain America: Reborn Captain America and Black Widow On the one year anniversary of Steve Rogers' death, Bucky, along with his fellow Avengers went together to the vigil in Steve's honor. As they attended the vigil, they noticed as Norman Osborn and his fake Avengers scanned the crowd, looking for the real Avengers. After the vigil, the Avengers are stopped by Sharon Carter , who says she has found a way to save Steve. With the help of Nick Fury, Cap and Black Widow sneak aboard the H.A.M.M.E.R . Helicarrier, making their way through a group of H.A.M.M.E.R. agents, the two heroes make their way to the carriers storage area hoping to find the Red Skull's device he was using on Sharon a while back, but they are surprised to find that the device is not there and are then attacked by Osborn's Dark Avengers, Ares and Venom. After a short fight, Cap and Widow are captured and taken to Norman, who then reveals that he has outed Sharon as the second shooter in the death of Captain America. He then lets Widow go to give Sharon a message that if she doesn't turn herself in, he'll kill Bucky. Who will Wield the Shield? While being transported by Norman's Thunderbolts, Cap is freed by Ant-Man as Falcon comes to his rescue. After escaping, Cap, Widow, and Ronin (Clint Barton) take out one of H.A.M.M.E.R.'s mobile data-collectors as they try to find out where Sharon Carter - who turned herself in to Osborn - is being held. Using Sharon Carter, the Red Skull is able to pull Steve Rogers - who had been placed in his own past by the Skull - back to the present, putting his own mind inside Steve's body. As the Skull heads to the White House, Cap and the rest of the Avengers chase the Skull down in the Avengers' Quinjet , but they are shot down and land in front of the Lincoln Memorial. As the Avengers fight off the Skull's forces, Cap goes after Red Skull, hoping that Steve is still in there somewhere. This hunch proves to be right as Steve is able to force Red Skull out of his mind, and together, Steve, Bucky, and the Avengers are finally able to defeat the Red Skull once and for all. Days after Steve's return, Black Widow finds Bucky trying to design himself a new suit, stating that since Steve is back, he'll be wanting his shield, but Widow disagrees and believes Bucky is a great Captain America, and shouldn't have to give the shield up. She is finally able to convince Bucky to go out one more night as Captain America. As the two try to recapture the Hyde , who had escaped from Raft , Bucky sees Steve watching above and throws him his shield, allowing him to defeat Hyde. Steve then tries to give Bucky the shield back, stating that he's Captain America, not him. After a talk, Steve tells Bucky that he's not sure if he can pick up his shield again, saying that being Captain America means something more to Bucky and that he should keep doing it and that if Bucky won't do it for himself, then to at least do it for him. Siege When the assembled heroes learn of Norman Osborn's Siege on Asgard, Bucky joined together with Steve Rogers and the rest of the New Avengers as they set off to end Norman's Dark Reign once and for all. Before they heroes left, Bucky told Steve that if he was going to be Captain America one last time and take his country back, he wasn't going to do it without the shield, giving the shield back to Steve for one last go. Arriving in Asgard, Bucky worked together with the Avengers as they took on Norman's forces. The battle seemed to have been won when Iron Man joined the battle and shut Norman's armor down, but Bucky along with the others were caught off guard when the Sentry brought all of Asgard crashing to the ground. Bucky managed to survive Sentry's attack, easily defeating Crossfire and meeting back with Steve as they worked together to help a man whose family had been caught in the collapse of Asgard during Sentry's attack. After defeating Razorfist who was holding the man's young girls hostage, the two patriots continued their search for anyone else who needed Captain America's help. Bucky and the other Avengers work together to fight the Void . After defeating him with the help of the Norn Stones , Steve gives Bucky the shield back, telling him that if he's learned anything during the battle, it's that the world only needs one Captain America, and that person is Bucky. Bucky and the New Avengers then leave and capture The Hood , Madame Masque , John King , and Count Nefaria . Bucky later joins the rest of the team at Avengers Tower to celebrate their victory and to usher in a new age of heroes. Enter the Heroic Age Joining the Avengers After getting an upgrade for his bionic arm from Nick Fury, Bucky learns that the Captain America of the 1950s has sided with the terrorist group known as the Watchdogs . He and Falcon then head to Idaho to bring him in. Bucky manages to get inside the Watchdogs' training camp and spends a week training with them. Bucky and Falcon ambush a group of Watchdogs who were on a scouting mission, possibly looking for new recruits from a nearby army base. Bucky enters the camp as a new recruit in hopes of stopping 50s Cap's plan, but their own plan backfires and both he and Falcon are captured. 50s Cap then forces Bucky to dress up in an old "Bucky" uniform as they head to the Hoover Dam where 50s Cap plans to make a statement that will be heard around the world by blowing up the dam. Bucky is able to escape his restraints thanks to his bionic arm, and with the help of Falcon, who was able to escape his captors as well, the two heroes fight off the Watchdogs. Bucky tries to reason with 50s Cap as he is just about to set off the bomb that will destroy the dam, but in the end, Bucky is forced to shot 50s Cap, knocking him off of the dam to his "death". As it turns out 50s Cap survived and hasn't been seen since. After being given Norman Osborn's position as Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. by the President of the United States, Steve Rogers decided to make the Avengers the world's new peace keeping organization instead of S.H.I.E.L.D. or H.A.M.M.E.R., assembling Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Hawkeye, Spider-Woman , Wolverine , and Spider-Man as the newest incarnation of Earth's Mightiest Heroes under the command of Maria Hill . No Escape No one escapes from Baron Zemo After failing to stop the Wrecking Crew from making a heist, Falcon and Steve Rogers take Bucky out for some drinks after a game. They are concerned that Bucky is taking the whole deal with 50's Cap and that he's beating himself up over it, going so far as to even let super-villain's do it for him. Bucky is able to get Steve and Sam off his back after telling them that he's fine. Later that night as they three are leaving, Sam offers to drive Bucky home since he appears drunk, only to figure out that he isn't drunk, bur drugged, but isn't quick enough to stop Sam from being caught in an explosion that unknown to Bucky was caused by none other than the recently returned Baron Helmut Zemo . Bucky goes with Sam as he is rushed to the hospital, and then begins to beat himself up for what happened to Sam. While still feeling the effects of being drugged, Bucky is attacked by the Iron Hand who had been hired by Baron Zemo, Bucky defeats Iron Hand but is then attacked by Nazi soldiers whom Bucky easily defeats, but is shocked to find out that he wasn't fighting Nazi's but NYPD officers when he is finally stopped by Steve Rogers. Steve takes Bucky back to Avengers Tower where they find some sort of nano-tech virus in his bloodstream, but this is fixed quickly. After learning that footage of Bucky fighting police officers was now public, Bucky and Black Widow go off to find out who it was that had drugged him in the first place, after tracking down where the bar tender who gave him the drink lived, they soon find out that she is the newest Beetle , who catches them both by surprise. Bucky finds a message from Baron Zemo in his bathroom he then goes to an army base. They fight and Baron Zemo wins and puts Bucky on a plane over to the English channel. Bucky then fights it out with Baron Zemo. He has the chance to kill Baron Zemo but he does not. Steve, Falcon and Black Widow go and get Bucky and bring him back to America so now The Trial of Captain America now awaits him back home. Trial of Captain America Bucky's past has finally caught up with him. Baron Zemo exposed Mr. Barnes as the Winter Soldier and the media storm began raging. Steve Rogers, convinced that the entire trial will be nothing but a media circus, tells Bucky that he should run. Bucky, however, realizes that it's time for him to face the past. He can't run- he needs to follow through with this. Bucky officially turned himself over to federal authorities and is now awaiting trial. As Bucky's trial gets underway Black Widow and the Falcon capture Dr Faustus so he can defend Bucky. They next go on to find evidence that Bucky was completely under mind control but are captured by the Red Skull. Meanwhile at Bucky's trial a man attacks him with an AIM weapon. The man is brought down by Steve Rogers. The man gives Rogers a video with Sin, now the Red Skull, revealing that she will kill Black Widow and Falcon and blow up the Statue of Liberty if Bucky is not delivered to her. The Trial of Captain America Begins Bucky wants to go but the judge would not let him so Steve set out to rescue them. During transport Dr Faustus helps Bucky escape for unknown reasons. Sin is next seen on the Statue of Liberty and has her men hack into broadcasting so she appears on TV. Just as she begins to talk Bucky attacks her in his Captain America suit. As the fight begins Sin gets away and Bucky starts to fight Master Man. Master Man manages to get the upper hand but Steve and Sharon arrive and save him. Bucky next makes his way up the statue of liberty. Sin begins to shoot him and Bucky blocks the bullets with his shield. The bullets explodes sending Bucky down the stairs and breaking some of his ribs. Sin make up to where the Black Widow and Falcon are being held and waits for Bucky. Bucky makes it to the room an uses his shield to free Widow and Falcon. Sin detonates charges, sending Bucky flying into a wall. Sin then kicks him in the head and escapes using a jet pack. Bucky tries to stop her but Sin uses a pistol to shoot him down. Falcon save him from the fall. Widow then reveal that Sin would only have detonate the charge if Bucky didn't come and that she was a symbolic victory. They all then realize that the blast took out one of the Statue of Liberty's eyes. Steve and Bucky argue about him coming to save Widow and Falcon. They head back to the court house. The judge declares Bucky to be innocent but Russian officials come to take Bucky back to Russia where he has been convicted of crime against the state. Gulag and Fear Itself Bucky seemingly perishes While in the Gulag , Bucky starts finding old memories brought to life. As he dreams his memories start to shatter and run together. He is made to fight in an arena against super-powered opponents, such as Ursa Major and even Titanium Man . Bucky was brought to the Gulag as a plot by Colonel Andre Rostov (Red Barbarian) to extract information from his mind regarding the location and activation codes for three additional sleeper agents that were trained by Bucky and hidden within the United States. Once the codes were extracted, Bucky was forced to fight Unicorn in the arena. Bucky continually evades the blasts from Unicorn's third eye until he maneuvers in front of the methane tanks which are blown up destroying much of the Gulag. Bucky makes his escape of the burning prison to find that Black Widow was there with a helicopter ready to break him out. During Fear Itself , Bucky has returned to the States as Captain America to face Sin, the new Red Skull and now Skadi, in Washington. In the midst of the battle, Sin rips off Bucky's bionic arm and impales him with the shaft of her hammer killing him shortly before he warns Black Widow of the Serpent 's arrival. Fear Itself 7.1: Captain America Nick Fury reveals to Steve Rogers that his sidekick and "brother" was not killed by Sin during the events of Fear Itself . As Black Widow and Fury have Bucky medevaced out of Washington, the medic tells Fury that Bucky is barely alive. Fury gives the go ahead for the doctor to use the last of the Infinity Formula in order to save Bucky. Steve is upset that he was left in the dark on this subject, but Fury explains to him that it had to be this way and no one can find out that Bucky is alive because of what transpired at Bucky's Trial and the Gulag . With Bucky presumed dead, he can continue his work in the shadows as the Winter Soldier! Captain America and Bucky Bucky narrates the story starting with his family and the good times. He speaks of his father and his kid sister and how life was on base. When his father dies he becomes the mascot for the base and soon is sent overseas for special training. He returns to find Captain America waiting on his new partner, Bucky Barnes! The narrative skips around to his days with The Invaders and his days as the Winter Soldier. The Longest Winter Black Widow and Winter Soldier as partners Bucky and Black Widow were looking for a sleeper agent stasis container at a Vegas casino and when they got there they realized the agent had been awakened. They have a briefing in the morning with Jasper Sitwell who tells them about a former KGB agent named Nico Stanovich, who went in hiding and is perhaps the handler of the awoken sleeper agent. Bucky and Natasha head to Minnesota where they meet another former KGB agent of the same squad named Mikel Bulgakov. They interrogate Bulgakov until he gives them the little info he knows about the sleepers' activation codes which he sold to some unknown buyers and the next sleeper. Bucky and Natasha go the warehouse location and dispatch the agents in there. They get assaulted by a genetically modified gorilla with a chain gun and after a brief battle, the gorilla flies off. They head back for another briefing and find the activated sleeper, while Nick Fury gives them some intel on an infiltration mission at an auction. Bucky starts a raid and him and Nat defeat the goons there and get more info on the buyer of the codes who also happened to buy a doombot. They narrow down the possible people who want to use these agents and bot to start a war between the U.S. and Latveria to Lucia Von Bardas . In order to get help and prevent a war, Bucky and Natasha infiltrate Dr. Doom's fortress who attacks them in confusion until Bucky tells him to stop and someone is trying to frame him with the Doombot. Bucky and Dr. Doom face off against the Doombot and Arkady, a sleeper agent. Bucky ends up killing Arkady. Bucky, Doom and Natasha infiltrate Doom's hidden missile silo where Von Bardas is located. Bucky runs off and defeats Dimitri. Natasha tells Bucky about intel that Agent Sitwell had. The intel was about the person who sold the codes to the Zephyr Sleepers. That person was Colonel Andre Rostov (Red Barbarian) Ex-Soviot Agent. Bucky then tracks him down in the Bahamas and assassinates him by sniper shot. Broken Arrow Bucky investigates the final sleeper agent's stasis pod location and learns he has been broken out for some time. They learn his name is Leo Novokov . To locate the sleeper, Bucky decides to check the newspapers because controllers used secret classified ads to find the agents and find a handler was killed. Fred Davis , the one time Bucky stand in, was killed Leo causing Bucky and Natasha to investigate allowing Leo to find Bucky to begin his revenge. Novokov kidnaps Professor Rodchenko who was a former Red Room Russian scientist that specialized in brainwashing. Bucky and Natasha locate Novokov on a stolen bus and intercept it on a mountain highway. After a shoot out, Novokov flees the bus which is loaded down with explosives. Natasha follows Novokov while Bucky drives the bus off an overlook to explode harmlessly after he jumped out at the last moment. Novokov set the whole instance up to separate Natasha from Bucky where he kidnaps her. Bucky and Agent Sitwell search for clues on where Leonid has taken Natasha while it is revealed that he has brainwashed her and set her up to be a ballerina. Bucky and Sitwell are able to locate her at a private performance for the First Lady of the United States and members of the press. After seeing to the evacuation of the crowd, Bucky engages the brainwashed Black Widow in an attempt to get her to be released from the brainwashing effects. Leonid opens fire upon them causing Bucky to leave his fight and attack Leo head on. After a brief fight, Leo points out that Natasha was about to kill Sitwell. Bucky stops Natasha from shooting and she remembers who she is, but Leo is able to escape. Bucky tracks down where the Professor is being kept captive while Natasha is taken back to the helicarrier for a medical analysis. When Bucky finds the Professor, he is informed that there is more Leo's plan and that Natasha was still under Leo's control. Widow Hunt Widow Hunt While on the Helicarrier, a second layer of programming kicks in for Natasha and she attacks Nick Fury, Sitwell, and the SHIELD agents on board. She is about to kill Fury when Sitwell steps in front of the gun and takes the fatal bullets. Natasha flees the Helicarrier on a flying motorcycle and vanishes without a trace. During interrogation with Professor Rodchenko, Bucky finds out that all memories of his relationship with Natasha has been removed from her memory. He is trying to cope with this information when Captain America arrives and lets him know that they are going to find her along with Hawkeye, Wolverine, and Maria Hill. Bucky and Hawkeye head research where Novokov is headed next. They find a spot where they get attacked by AIM agents and they make short work of them. Bucky and Clint enter a building where they find a hard drive with a message from Novokov saying if Bucky ever wants to see Natasha again, he will take the hard drive and have Professor Rodchenko install it in his head. Bucky is attempted to be talked out of the mission but by Hill and Hawkeye, but he manages to escape them and breaks Rodchenko out of jail to install the mission. The installment is successful which reverts Barnes back to his original days as the Winter Soldier. Bucky turns on the professor and uses the memory machine on him to erase his mind. Bucky is trailed by Wolverine and Hawkeye and manages to escape by cheap shotting on Logan and utilizing the environment to his advantage. It is revealed the mission is for Bucky to target Daredevil whom is someone Natasha cares about. Bucky finds Daredevil and they fight him. Wolverine, Captain America and Hawkeye join in and they knock Barnes out and bring him back to S.H.I.E.L.D where they manage to piece his memory back together. The team then heads out to find Novokov and retrieve Black Widow. Bucky and the team learn that Leo has planted a bomb somewhere and learn of three locations. They each scatter taking one location with James heading out on his own. He finds the bomb along with Leo and Natasha. Natasha discovers him and Bucky faces off against the two. He tries to avoid harming Natasha and focuses his assault on Leo and manages to beat him down. S.H.I.E.L.D sends Wolverine , Hawkeye , and Cap along with plenty of reinforcements to the bomb site where Leo attempts to hold Widow hostage. Hawkeye manages to separate them allowing Bucky to shoot Novokov. S.H.I.E.L.D manages to resuscitate Leo and they manage to connect all of Widow's memories back together up to current time except for one; the one about Bucky. S.H.I.E.L.D attempts to continue fixing Widow, but Bucky screams at them to stop messing with her head as she has suffered enough. Bucky looks in on Natasha's room saying at least only he has to suffer these feelings as he walks away heartbroken with the realization Leo had truly won. The Man On the Wall Bucky Barnes: Cosmic Assassin During the events of Original Sin , Bucky is contacted by a mysterious voice after Uatu the Watcher is murdered. It is revealed that the original Nick Fury is dying due to the Infinity Serum having run out, and is seeking to find someone to replace him in his role as "The Man On the Wall", Earth's secret defense against cosmic and otherworldly threats. Bucky is chosen as a candidate alongside Black Panther , Emma Frost , Gamora , Ant-Man , the Punisher , Doctor Strange and Moon Knight , and ultimately becomes the new protector of Earth after Fury seemingly perishes. He recruits Quake (who had been fired from S.H.I.E.L.D.) to act as his new partner, with the two stealthily eliminating potential threats to Earth before they even have a chance to strike. Powers, Abilities and Equipment Bucky is not like Steve, he did not take a Super Soldier Serum, though Bucky is classified as peak human. Bucky Barnes also has a left Cybernetic Arm that has a significant amount of strength (capable of throwing a shield through guns and steel super computers), it is also capable of producing EMP's and electrical shocks. He has recently been injected with the Infinity Formula by Nick Fury, in order to save Bucky. Whether or not this has any effect on his physical abilities beyond great longevity remains to be seen. In the Marvel Cinematic Universe In the recent Captain America Films, it is apparent that Arnim Zola’s experiments, and the additional rigors of Hydra’s manipulations have resulted in Bucky’s physical attributes reaching meta-human levels. In “Captain America: The Winter Soldier”, we see that his non-cybernetic strength is comparable to Captain America's, as we observe him kick a SHIELD operative 30 feet through the air (into a QuinJet Turbine). We can also assume that his agility and reflexes have also been similarly enhanced, since he continued to be a formidable challenge for Cap in hand to hand combat, while we see Cap easily defeat Batroc the Leaper, who is a highly trained fighter, with exceptional ‘human’ physical prowess levels. It can also be deduced that Bucky’s running speed is slightly faster than Cap’s since both he and the Black Panther out-ran Steve during the chase in Berlin, in "Captain America: Civil War." Fighting Ability As a young teenager, James was observed to have remarkable fighting prowess by fighting military men twice his size and age. Concerned, the U.S. Army decided to make use of James fighting ability and immediately sent him off to train with the British SAS. Upon returning, he continued his training under William Essart Fairbairn and Colonel Rex Applegate to become Bucky, the sidekick to Captain America (Steve Rogers). As Bucky, he was further trained by Steve Rogers until his death and rebirth into the Russian assassin known as the Winter Soldier. With no prior memory of his former self except for his fighting ability, the Winter Soldier continued to train under the Russians to harness his skill in martial arts and assassinations. Because of his skill, James became the basis for the Red Room program and trained dozens of other Russian assassins including the Black Widow. Bucky has proven his fighting ability against creditable fighters such as Black Widow, Sin, Crossbones, Batroc the Leaper, Wolverine and more. Although he has doubted himself by comparing his physical ability to Steve's super soldier abilities (Approximately 3 times stronger and faster than himself), with his lack of super soldier formula and ability to go toe to toe against many of Steve’s rogues and win proves that he is on a level close to Steve's fighting ability. Personality Bucky, like many others, looks up to Steve Rogers. He has a great deal of respect for Steve, but Bucky is also ashamed of what he has done as Winter Soldier. Bucky has shown signs of aggression whilst depressed and has also redeveloped a relationship with Black Widow. But he is also sarcastic and makes jokes like his light-hearted self. Bucky's bionic arm emitting an electrical charge As the Winter Soldier he has super strength and quick reaction time and the ability to produce EMPs, as well as jammers for metal detectors and x-ray machines, due to his cyborg left arm. Even when this arm is removed, Winter Soldier can mentally control it from a remote location. His time as a covert Soviet agent has further honed his skills giving him a combination of mix fighting styles for use in close combat. As the Winter Soldier, Barnes became an expert assassin and spy and performed many behind the scenes assassinations without getting caught making some of his kills look like accidents. Thanks to Nick Fury, Bucky's bionic arm is now covered in a flesh like material making it both look and feel like a real arm. Equipment As the Winter Soldier, James's missing arm was replaced by a cybernetic enhancement. As his career progressed as Captain America, Nick Fury found it necessary to upgrade his arm to be fully synthetic in order to look and feel real. The arm is capable of the following: When detached, can be controlled by James through mental implants. Capable of punching through metal and throwing a shield fast enough to slice through human limbs, control panels and assault rifles. Capable of emitting a electrical shocks. Capable of emitting an EMP to shut down electrical hardware. Capable of bypassing any airport sensor. Holographic imaging to appear as a normal human arm. Looks and feels like a human arm. As Captain America, James also carried the famous indestructible Vibranium-steel alloy shield and a modified handgun. The handgun closely resembles Nick Fury's modified handgun and has been commented by Mockingbird to fire greater impacting bullets than normal handguns. Ares has also been winded by being tricked and shot under the chin by Bucky. Bucky's gun has palm-print sensors so if anyone other than Bucky were to try and shoot the gun it would explode. As the post-Cold War Winter Soldier, Bucky has an updated Winter Soldier BDU and gear: Impact resistant. Bullet resistant. Security jamming built in. The suit continues to give off a pulse which continuously jams and loops all recording devices for a few seconds. Personal Data Earth-58163 Bucky (House of M) House of M In the House of M reality, Bucky Barnes was an elite SHIELD soldier sent to Genosha by Bolivar Trask in order to murder Magneto . Bucky's squad was formed by Mimic and Nuke and although they managed to cause a great deal of damage and casualties among the mutant population (Barnes murdered Charles Xavier ) they were ultimately defeated and killed by Magneto. Buck Barnes of Earth-Law Enforcement Squad While searching for an alternate version of Frankie Raye during the early stages of The Abraxas Incident, the Fantastic Four and Namorita encountered The Law Enforcement Squad (Marvel's JSA), an alternate reality Avengers-esque team of superheroes that was led by an intelligent version of The Hulk . Bucky (who was simply known as "Buck" in that reality) was a member of this unusual gathering alongside Battlin' Jack Murdock , Captain Universe , Doctor Druid , Living Lightning , Namora , Red Raven , Robert Frank , The Rose and The Shroud . The two teams clashed with one another when The Fantastic Four found the alternate Frankie Raye at the mercy of The Law Enforcement Squad. After being hit Namorita was tossed to the floor and ended up being hit on by Buck. Namorita said "Aren't you dead?" and the alternate Buck responded, albeit confused, with a no. He was then quickly knocked out by Namorita who told Buck not to call her "Dollface" anymore. Later, when Captain Universe "died" at the hands of the alternate Frankie Raye, the two teams set aside their differences while Reed and Buck's ally Doctor Druid went to converse with Captain Universe in the realm that existed in-between all realities. He was last seen vanishing with the rest of The Law Enforcement Squad as their reality and Earth-616 split apart from one another. Earth-12591 Marvel Zombies Destroy In this alternate reality the Nazis found a plant that turned them in Zombies. The Nazi-Zombies took over the world. At some point Bucky was bitten by a zombie and turned into one himself. He then joined to Nazi-Zombies in taking over the world. At some point he joined other zombie superpowers and became part of the Invaders. The Invaders where the first superpower team that Dum Dum Dugan and his Ducky's Dozen fought when they came to Earth-12591. The Ducky's Dozen escaped but when they tried to infiltrate the Nazi-Zombie Headquarters, Bucky was there. He tried to stop Miss America from lanching Big Boy, a rocket powered bomb that could wipe out all Zombies. He fails when Miss America bites his hand and makes him lose his grip and fall to earth. It can be assumed he is blown up with the rest of the Nazi-Zombies. Earth-16010 In the Ultimate Marvel universe, Bucky was Steve's childhood friend and a young photographer during World War 2. Unlike his mainstream Marvel counterpart, this version of Bucky survived the war unscathed. After Steve was frozen and believed dead, Bucky eventually married Gail Richards , Steve's former fiancee. Other Media Television Bucky Barnes - Avengers Bucky appeared in the Captain America portion of the 1960's Marvel Superheroes Show. More recently, he featured in The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes animated series. In the episode "Meet Captain America" voiced by Scott Melville . He is shown to be Cap's trusted sidekick working with him to stop the Red Skull from unleashing Asgardian creatures upon the Allied Forces. He is apparently killed in an rocket explosion after saving Cap from Red Skull. Bucky's death greatly affects Cap during the series, causing him to relive flashbacks with Bucky in the episode "Living Legend". However, Bucky returns in the episode "Hail, Hydra!" surviving through the intervention of Captain America's contact with a Cosmic Cube . He returns as the Winter Soldier (voiced by Jon Curry) in the episodes "Nightmare In Red" and "Red Alert", where he is seen as part of Code Red, a team of government operatives. He is later revealed to be Bucky in the episode "Winter Soldier", where he reluctantly helps Captain America fight the Sleepers . He returns in the series finale, where he is one of the many heroes who helps fight Galactus and his Heralds . Winter Soldier in Avengers Assemble Bucky is next featured as the Winter Soldier in the Avengers Assemble animated series. In the episode "Ghosts of the Past", he infiltrates Avengers Tower and kidnaps the Red Skull. His origin is briefly recounted, with it stated that he was thought dead in World War 2, only for the Red Skull to transform him into a brainwashed assassin. He now seeks to have his revenge by killing the Red Skull, which brings him into conflict with the Avengers, who need the information the Skull has on Thanos and the Infinity Stones . He is forced to flee after his plan is thwarted. Video Games Film Ultimate Avengers In the animated feature film Ultimate Avengers , Bucky Barnes was an army photographer and the adult sidekick of Captain America during World War II. When Steve is presumed dead, killed trying to deactivate a prototype Nazi a-bomb in mid-flight, Buck marries Steve's fiance, Gail. Buck and Steve are reunited in the 2000s after Steve was revived from being frozen in the Arctic after the bomb exploded. He was voiced by James Arnold Taylor. Captain America: The First Avenger Sebastian Stan as Bucky Barnes In Captain America: The First Avenger , Bucky is portrayed by Sebastian Stan . Like his Ultimate counterpart, Bucky is a young adult and Steve's childhood friend. He enlists in the army during World War 2, leaving Steve behind and serving as one of the reasons his friend volunteers for the Super-Soldier experiment. After his unit is captured by the Red Skull's forces in Europe, Bucky is tortured and experimented on by Arnim Zola before being rescued by Steve, now the superhero Captain America. He joins Cap as a member of the Howling Commandos and fights in many battles, but seemingly falls to his death during a mission to capture Zola. Captain America: The Winter Soldier Sebastian Stan as The Winter Soldier Sebastian Stan reprises his role in the 2014 film Captain America: The Winter Soldier . It is revealed that thanks to the experiments done by Zola, Bucky's body was revived and brainwashed by HYDRA , who have used him as an assassin in the ensuing decades. His mangled left arm was also replaced with an advanced cybernetic prosthetic. He was given the codename "Winter Soldier" by his superiors. The Winter Soldier is removed from stasis after Captain America's return is made public during the events of The Avengers , and is forced to battle Steve and his new allies, Falcon and Black Widow . At the close of the film, Bucky seemingly regains control of himself and sets off to regain his lost memories. Avengers: Age of Ultron The Winter Soldier is alluded to in The Avengers: Age of Ultron , though he doesn't appear directly. Near the start of the film, Falcon mentions that he is still searching for Bucky while Steve helps the Avengers take down the remaining HYDRA cells. It's implied that the search isn't going particularly well, as Sam states that many of the leads have gone cold. Ant-Man The cameo in Ant-Man Sebastian Stan reprises his role in a cameo in Ant-Man , though he only appears in the film's post-credits scene. He is seen with his metal arm trapped in some sort of vise, while Captain America and Falcon discuss how proceed from here on out. When it's mentioned that Iron Man isn't likely to assist them, Falcon suggests that Scott Lang may be able to help them somehow. Captain America: Civil War Civil War Sebastian Stan reprises his role in Captain America: Civil War . The movie sees Bucky going on the run after he is framed for a deadly terrorist attack, with both Iron Man and Black Panther pursuing him. He informs Steve that in addition to himself, Hydra created five other Winter Soldiers, each more powerful than him. Helmut Zemo discovers the location where the others are being held in cryogenic stasis, and Bucky informs Steve that they have to stop him before he can use the other Winter Soldiers to cause untold damage across the globe. During the climax of the movie, it is revealed that Zemo has already killed the other Winter Soldiers, and actually wants to expose the fact that Bucky is responsible for the murders of Howard and Maria Stark . Iron Man goes berserk after this, and injures Bucky before being stopped by Steve. At the close of the movie, Bucky willingly undergoes cryogenic freezing in Wakanda , reasoning that he's too dangerous to be allowed out in the world until the Hydra programming can be removed from his brain. Merchandise

i don't know

What television staple, developed by Beavis and Butt-head creator Mike Judge, is having its final episodes air this Sunday, following a 13 year run?

Idiocracy Reviews & Ratings - IMDb IMDb 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Great comedy - perfectly fits Mike's Judge's style from United States 27 February 2007 I was one of the few who went out of my way to see this in the theater. I've thought about it frequently ever since. After two DVD viewings I'm glad to say it held up perfectly. Like any great comedy, I laughed more on each viewing, both in anticipation of gags, but also after catching things missed before. Mike Judge does very well with creating insanely comedic characters and fitting them into their world so they make sense. In Office Space, the environment make the characters believable. Idiocracy's future gives him liberty to write unbelievably dumb characters and make them work. I'll be waiting to see if they release a better DVD with some actual features before buying it. But this movie deserves the support on DVD not offered to it at the theater. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Extraordinary! Written with so much Imagination! from United States 23 February 2007 Colorful! Bright! Fresh! Funny! Written with a free spirit! Mike Judge creates a whole new world in this epic comedy. The direction and the story is marvelous! I was expecting something along the lines of office space, and got something so much more extraordinary! This movie shows the more artistic and creative side of Judge. This film is out of this world! Scene after scene you're going, "What the hell!" in a good way! It is another one of the 'few' movies of it's time that is one of a kind and completely one hundred percent original. Watch it! you will not be disappointed. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: It Would Have Been a Blockbuster, but I'm Kinda Glad It Wasn't from nyc 17 February 2007 This movie is wickedly funny *and* clever, much more so than your typical high-grossing comedy. Its social commentary feels both on-target and disquieting, but it never loses its sense of humor. If this movie had been promoted by the studio and given a wider release, it would have made money--possibly quite a lot of money. So why did Fox not promote it and not give it a wide release? Some have conspiracy theories: its anti-corporate message was not one Fox wanted to endorse; they don't want you to see this movie because you'll rise up and fight against neoliberalism. But, none of those seem very convincing to me. It is on DVD, after all. We can see it, after all. And so can people all around the world. Maybe the powers that be at Fox thought it better suited for cult status, maybe they thought it an unpalatable movie about things its audience doesn't really want to hear about themselves. Maybe they thought it would gain underground respect by not being a hit and gain international attention on the DVD circuit given the rise in America-mocking. Ultimately, I think they were aware of its potential unpalatability and motivated by money. Unfortunately for them, they couldn't have predicted how well this would have ridden on Borat's coat tails. I'm glad, however, that it's not going to be seen by EVERYONE. Because if it had been promoted and given a wide release, its subversiveness would have been dampened and its message garbled in the popular airwaves. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: I didn't realize how much I liked it until I kept laughing the next day. from United States 12 February 2007 This movie seems really stupid but it grows on you. I have to see it again and I will likely buy the DVD. The characters are repulsively idiotic but that's the idea. I don't want to give anything away and so I'm being careful.......the possibility of our society degrading into such.....there are no other words to describe it..an idiocracy, is just disturbing - really disturbing. I'm still disturbed. The disposable clothing pulled from a dispenser on the wall is a really good marketing idea, though, I have to say. I'm surprised it's not already out there. I guess my final thought is that this is a stupid movie for smart people because stupid people just won't get it. They're already in the mental ozone. This movie makes you want to pick up a book - quick before anymore brain cells disappear. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: stop comparing it to office space!!!! from Canada 3 February 2007 seriously...nothing irks me more than people trashing a film or director/writer because their latest film 'isn't anything like their last one.' are people really that simple?! do you REALLY want to watch essentially the same film over and over again?! might as well stare at a wall, because that's about as much brainpower as it takes to watch a sequel to anything...same characters, same situations, SAME OLD SAME OLD. so quit your whining please & just review the frickin' movie on it's own, Beavis. that aside, it's a frighteningly funny and accurate view of what our society will be like if the human race actually survives another 500 years. i don't think people really realize how much consumer culture is ingrained in our daily lives. love and respect for each other & any other living thing (including the damned planet that keeps us ALIVE!!!) matters less and less compared to financial gain and material wealth. and YES the human race gets dumber and dumber, if i (as a wee 25 year old) can see the changes in the way people speak and interact in just my short lifetime...things are getting pretty bad. don't believe me? just take a ride on public transit...bus, metro, whatever...and listen to the young people around you talk. that, in itself, is evidence enough. and as for people claiming that some of the characters are 'too dumb'... you obviously didn't grow up around rednecks. people reproduce at such a young age, with no regard for what a BIG responsibility it is to have kids...so do the math. kids having kids = everyone gets dumber by the generation. seems pretty dead-on to me! it's a wake up call, so you should be grateful it's one that actually tries to make you laugh. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: A movie that stupid people don't like from United States 1 February 2007 Idiocracy felt like Mike Judge took my thoughts on society and put them into film. In fact, the movie is a social commentary. Almost feels like a documentary at times. Luke Wilson did a good job playing a boring average joe (Like in most of his movies). Of Course Idiocracy was an extreme of the current state of society. But that's what makes most comedies funny, a extreme of any situation. Fiction isn't that much different then reality. With kids praising materialist Hip-Hop culture and taking pride in being ignorant. When people feel useless in life, they breed. Giving them a purpose in the world. And it seems only the worse people breed the most. I can understand how others don't like it. It doesn't help most of the jokes were 2nd grade bathroom humor. Not much different than a Kevin Smith film. Idiocracy throws away logic, reason, any intelligence (For good reason). Mike Judges comeback was a knockout. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Not Sure. And the Extinction of Intelligence in the Species – a satirical anthropological "what if" 30 January 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** After just seeing H6, I needed something to "clean my palate" of the gnawing thoughts in the back of my skull. Mike "Bolton" Judge; writer, producer and director of Bevis and Butthead and Office Space, provides a movie that is parodic at times (elements of Logan's Run, Planet of the Apes, the Last Man on Earth and the Omega Man permeates the story, while overtly sanctioning the "consumerist zombie" theory of George Romero). It is satirical and yet still funny the rest of the time. The difference is that previous views of the future of humankind are a bit more dignified than in this movie. The future was always a bright, gleaming beacon for the elevation of mankind (in some cases the humans themselves had not changed, yet technologically we were more advanced). This movie takes is the opposite way - a.k.a. the toilet. Humanity has degraded to stupidity and apathy on all possible levels. The movie functions on the level of the viewer, while at the same time functioning on all its levels as a whole. This is the multi-tiered mound of garbage. Hidden treasures are abound for those that dig deep enough and yet there's stuff at the top for the not-so-motivated. During the year 2005, the United States military conducted a secret project ("The Human Hibernation Experiment" for short). This project consisted of hibernating a male and female for a period of one year. This was to be developed for the purpose of "freezing" our best troops so they can be freshly deployed where they would be needed. Obviously they would not use this on their best until it was tested. As the guinea pigs, they used the most average man in army, Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson) and a "private sector" female, Rita (SNL alumni Maya Rudolph). One intravenous injection of Yoo-Hoo later, while being packed into an army, green-fatigue, metal-looking coffin, they go to sleep expecting only a year to pass. In less than a year, the project is lost and forgotten, only to be accidentally discovered the same year as the Great Garbage Avalance of 2505. This is pure Philip J. Fry brought to live action. It is the same social criticism mixed with humor, character development and identification as you found from each and every episode of Futurama. It is a fish-out of water story where the fish looks more normal then the water (by contrast). Owen Wilson isn't quite Billy West, but he does a very good job a selling the likability of an average joe like Joe. There are some nice cameos in the movie including, the Apple guy (Justin Long), David Herman (from Office Space, Mad TV, and several voices on Futurama - Mayor C. Randall Poopenmayer, Professor Ogden Wernstrom, Turanga Morris, Larry , and Dwayne), Greg Pitts (the Oooohhh !! guy from Office Space), Scarface from Geto Boys (a pimp named Upgrayedd), Thomas Haden Church, and the pimped out and presidential Terry Crews (The President of the United States - Camacho). The movie is relatively fast paced and doesn't dwell too much on one theme. It is not an exhaustive study, if you choose to read it as such. At the same time there is enough detail to warrant a serious critique. Its ending is light hearted and positive and I think is the major detriment to the movie. The premise is at the same time ridiculously ludicrous and at the same time eerily possible. Another noteworthy instances would be the inclusion of President One tough-mother !! SHUT YOUR MOUTH !!! Its about damn time we had a black president. Sho'Nuff !! The genius of the Fat Museum is not lost on me either. OW ! My balls !! the TV show is pure genius. It makes American Idol seem like Tarkovsky, while reminiscent of the "I'd Buy That for A Dollar" TV show from Robocop. A highly recommendable and enjoyable, multi-teared romp through one oddly, possible future. It's nuculear, ass face !! (the finger salute of the future) Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Hilarious Commentary on Cultural Trends from Washington, DC 23 January 2007 I didn't have very high expectations for this film when it came out on DVD: I figured that if it had been shelved so long by the studios and given no exposure, it would be quite flawed with perhaps some bright spots. I was wrong. The movie shows a hilarious end-point of the dumbing-down of our culture, and even better, a great satire of what familiar corporate slogans might be in the future. The plot is thin, but since the movie has such a short running time, it only drags in a few spots. Otherwise, the jokes work, and carry right through until the end. Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph deliver good performances, but I thought that Dax Shepard stole the scenes in which he appeared. His depiction of an extremely stupid (but typical for the time) "lawyer" is one the best things about the movie (along with the visual gags, which will have you reaching for the pause key on your remote. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Actually having thought about it, this movie is very intelligent from Ireland 15 January 2007 Seriously though this movie is SAYING SOMETHING MAN. Its only flaw is it really saying the electrolytes would disappear after one day? After the water was put on the ground man !!... Come on... Aside from this basic problem i would add;...it's existential theme was intriguing, and the central plot and catalyst to the film was brilliantly disguised and provided an unexpected twist to the film.I would highly recommend this film. It's not to everyones taste and the genre is unusual, but these feel good films do provide humanity with hope. 10 / 10 for the screenplay ;) Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Hilarious yet frightening from Finland 14 January 2007 What's frightening, is that Idiocracy - at least in my opinion - is a terrifying and over-exaggerated caricature of the world today, especially in the U.S. Just look around you at almost any time and you will see where many of the crazy ideas in this film came from. What's even more frightening, is that in a future not quite as distant as 2505, the things you see in Idiocracy may well not seem as over-exaggerated as they do now. The film portrays one big nightmare of a future, yet manages to stay entertaining and, indeed, hilarious at many places. There is the scent of cheese in a couple of scenes but I have the feeling that's part of the idea. Whether you like other works of Judge or not, Idiocracy is definitely worth seeing. Excellent work. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: great idea and message...but execution, production not so great 13 January 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I really like the idea Judge tried to convey here. He got the feel of utter crassness and stupidity down very well. The problem is that the movie just seems kind of pulled together at the last minute. The plot is not that strong. And the ending is too conventional. In the end the movie seems to settle for too much. Sometimes the parody becomes heavy-handed, and repetitive. He could have probed deeper. It also suffers from problems with logic. How could a society that is so stupid produce the technology that this society has (such as the scanners and surveillance) Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Communicative dissonance? (haha!) 12 January 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Who hasn't harbored notions that eventually stupidity will take over the world and the smart people will cease to exist? Such is the science fiction question behind Mike Judge's (Office Space) new comedy staring Luke Wilson as the Most Average Man in the World timetravelling to the future to become the Most Intelligent Man in the World. I think what this film does really well is present the difficulties in trying to communicate to stupid people. In that sense of the dialog, this movie is actually quite genius. Wilson's character tries so hard to just straighten things up, but is oftentimes overwhelmed by the brick wall of complete absurdity: "But it has electrolytes!" "What are electrolytes?" "They're what plants crave!" "But why do they crave them?" "Because they're electrolytes!" "Yeah that's what plants crave!" It's a pretty silly movie. Unfortunately, some of the jokes had me wondering, "So... are these jokes funny because they make fun of people who think they're funny.... or are they still just dumb humor?" A hard line to draw in a movie of this type, but honestly the movie is fun enough and, uh, dumbed-down enough for everyone to enjoy! (Yes, indeed, the very people this movie makes fun of will find it enjoyable, I promise you). Ultimately it's pretty decent. --PolarisDiB Favorite Quote: The dialog above. DiB's arbitrary measure of quality: 3 garbage avalanches out of 5. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: 500 years in the future, Idiots rule the earth. 8 January 2007 A MUST SEE for fans of Futurama. This film is a spot-on satire of all the slothful, gluttonous and outright stupid aspects of American Culture. Filled with countless sight-gags, this film had me laughing-out loud constantly, so much so that I had to watch it again to get the jokes I laughed through. I don't know why the studio buried this, what with the success of other Mike Judge creations. Perhaps after watching it, they felt that the average American would simply be offended by having their precious consumer culture so thusly skewered. Bravo Mr. Judge and Thank You! Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: A lot of laughs 10 September 2006 *** This review may contain spoilers *** When I read about this move it seemed like a fun story line. The actual movie itself was something of a cross between Monty Python, Napoleon Dynamite, and the latest Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. The movie basically spoon feeds you the story. You are led from finding out exactly what sort of man Luke Wilson is in the movie and what is going to happen to him. Then you flash forward to 500 years in the future and suddenly he is the smartest man on the planet. Strangely enough for being the smartest man he has a lot of difficulty functioning. The female co-star who is a prostitute and gets sent forward with him finds it very easy to deal with simple minded folks who speak a high-bred gangster/valley girl speak. The movie is about how they deal with this unexpected turn of events. They were supposed to be frozen for 1 year and now its been 500. I know many people will turn their noses up at this incredibly stupid movie. There are a lot of jabs at things we do now, hinting that we're all on the fast road to a 53 IQ. However if you look closer you will see many original jokes, a lot of interesting twists and a whole movie full of good laughs. It made us think. Are we dumbing ourselves up? We're told that over and over. It sure felt like there was an underlying message all wrapped up in a comedy. At the end of the movie the woman sitting next to me threw her arms around her knees and hid her face in her purse on her lap and shouted out that is the dumbest movie I have ever seen! The man behind us said, well that about sums that up! However, everyone was laughing all the way out of the theater. I predict it will become a cult classic. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Good satire on a very broad level. 5 September 2006 *** This review may contain spoilers *** This is a movie with an interesting premise not developed fully. It is funny and sad at the same time because of the broad profile that it depicts. Seeing the movie at a multiplex with fifteen or sixteen screens was easy with the theater less than half full. The crowds around the complex seemed to be all of the extras used in Idiocracy. The only thing Judge left out was the cell phones and Ipods. I have never liked clothing with advertising on it and I have boycotted Carl, Jrs for years so the main theme of the movie struck me as appropriate. (I do like Costco, though). It is difficult to satirize situations that are satires themselves but Judge did a good job with this picture. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Go see it while you can!!! from United States 2 September 2006 I don't know why Fox dumped this movie like they have. It is hysterical and also kind of alarming since you feel like this movie really could come true. This movie appeals to everyone who doesn't mind a little swearing and sex humor--the smart people can laugh at the idiots and the dumb people... well, they'll feel right at home. So go see this movie before Fox dumps it to DVD. Talk about an idiocracy... (10 lines of text to post? What a stupid rule!) Umm... Luke Wilson is a great straight man and Maya Rudolph is good and damn sexy, I might add. Be sure to stay for the end of the credits, btw. Uh, let's see, filling ten lines here... Also thought Dax Shepard was pretty hysterical and my friend almost peed his pants when they showed the TV programming of the future. See? It appeals to everyone! Go see it! Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 5 people found the following review useful: A smart movie about stupid people. from United States 18 July 2009 In the year 2005, two people named Joe and Rita each go inside a time capsule for a year.But things go horribly wrong.Joe and Rita stay inside the time capsules for 500 years.While they're inside the time capsules, every other human is becoming stupider and stupider.When Joe and Rita wake up in the year 2505, it's up to them to fix everything.It may sound kind of stupid, but 'Idiocracy' is actually a pretty funny and entertaining comedy about stupid people.Add in a good performance by Justin Long, Dax Shepard, and Terry Crews, and you have a must see comedy that's definitely worth 84 minutes of your time and whatever amount of money that you payed to watch it. 'Idiocracy' is smarticracy. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 5 people found the following review useful: This movie is severely underrated from United States 17 June 2008 This movie has a "B-movie" feel to it, it was mistreated by Fox, poorly marketed, filming was rushed due to budget cuts. But the story, the dialog and the idea of this movie is first rate/first class. It's scary to see the extrapolation of where things are headed, and this movie will possibly some day be seen as prophecy. This movie is a must see, its required viewing, and if you don't laugh and enjoy this movie, get an MRI for a brain tumor. I really enjoyed watching this movie more than once, which is rare for me. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 5 people found the following review useful: You better shut up and let me watch my favorite movie..... from NewYorkCity 13 October 2007 Take a step, 500 years into our future, and take a look at what we will become, in about 100 years, given the recent degeneration we've undergone in literature, the arts, politics, and religion. Maya Rudolph has nice cans! Wasn't expecting that! Luke Wilson's patently weak acting chops fit perfectly into this vehicle, further illuminating the impending manifestation of the prophetic screenplay. Once you see this movie, you will see the Idiocracy in us all! Mike Judge may actually have created one of the roots of the dumbing-down of our society (Beavis and Butthead), but he sure has come full circle, to shed a bright light on what this road may one day lead to, besides a garbage avalanche! Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 5 people found the following review useful: In The Age Of Paris Hilton morons increasingly lead the way. 15 September 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** There will be plenty of people who will not only dislike the movie, but totally underestimate how fundamentally realistic its premise is. After all, studies of intelligence show that the average IQs have been steadily decreasing in the developed/developing world since the Industrial Revolution. What the narrator says in the introduction may be hilarious because of the images that go along with the text, but it's also 100% true. Truth is often funny, so people who find this movie unfunny may be too dumb to realize what kind of an age they live in, i.e. that they may be part of the problem - or they simply have a poor sense of humour. Anyone older than 30 who does not notice the dumbing-down effect around themselves is just about as moronic as the 26th century mongoloids Wilson has to deal with. But forget all that. The movie is just plain funny, in particular the first half. Unfortunately, the movie loses steam as it approaches the end (like so many comedies), and this is not due to is potentially one-joke premise but to the formulaic way in which events develop toward the finish. Nevertheless, the numerous laughs in the early stages more than make up for this. On paper, Luke Wilson may seem like a very poor choice for a leading man in an all-out comedy/satire, but he as Average Joe, i.e. the "straight man" in this plot, is an ideal choice. Some people complained about there not being a true comedian in his place, but they clearly missed the point of this movie. Someone like Jack Black - aside from being generally unfunny - would have been totally wrong for the part, ruining the movie. This is not a comedy that relies on the main character to provide the gags through buffoonery. The humour is to be found in the various wonderful details such as tilting buildings, unrepaired half-bridges, billboard adds, the prison's machine-guns, the "future morons", etc. Want to fight idiocracy? You can do worse than google "vjetropev". Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 5 people found the following review useful: You know, maybe having kids is over rated, if I have them, they are going to do so much reading! from Chicago, Illinois 27 June 2007 My boss has just been killing me with how much she has been raving about this movie. She said it was one of those films I just had to see and it was one of the funniest she saw. Then she said, hopefully as a joke, I should not come back to work until I saw this movie, so I rented it immediately that night and watched it. I have to agree, this was a very hilarious movie that I just couldn't stop laughing at. But do you wanna know something scary? After I saw this film, I was telling my mom how I agree that our society is "dumbening" down and how many of my friends could act like complete morons when it comes to common sense. Then I go online to check some mail and I see the lead story, parents in Switzerland wanna name their kid "4Real", scary isn't it? Joe is your average Joe, he is asked to participate in an army experiment with a hooker, Rita. This experiment is to see if we can prolong life, but before they can reopen the experiment, the army is shut down. 500 years have passed and Joe awakes to a very different world, but you know how we were supposed to get more intelligent in the future? Well, it's not like that, everyone speaks in "Valley Girl" or "Surfer Dude" or they just slur their words together. Joe is later proved to be the smartest man on Earth, which is good, I'm not sure compared to this world where they feed juice to plants and don't know how to treat sick people or know what shapes are. Joe has to save the world and humanity, which is pretty scary considering how normal he is and is being helped by a hooker. Idiocracy is one of those must see movies, in fact just take a look around, this will be our world if we don't shape up I feel. It's a really good movie and just a fun comedy that I'm sure will make you laugh more than a few times. I loved how Joe is trying to get his identity in this world and he ends up getting the name "Not Sure". I loved President Camacho and Upgradd. Please just give this movie a chance, it's all in good fun. 7/10 27 January 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Mike Judge's follow-up to the cult hit "Office Space" was held onto by 20th Century Fox for well over a year before it was finally dumped into a few theaters in the late summer. Fans of "Office Space" cried foul and lambasted the studio, but after seeing the movie, I can sympathize with the studio. "Idiocracy" is intermittently funny and hilarious at points, but it is a drab (purposefully so), bizarre film that will likely even leave many fans of Judge's work dissatisfied. "Idiocracy" is the story of a shiftless Army private (Luke Wilson) and prostitute (Maya Rudolph) who get drafted into a top secret military hibernation project. They'll be put to sleep and reawakened in one year, perfectly preserved. But, of course, this plan goes awry and they don't awake until the year 2505. The future is ugly, coarse, and incredibly stupid. The movie, like many dystopian stories, is not so much about the future as it is about poking fun at the present. Think "Futurama" meets "Transmetropolitan". The film is primarily a reflection on our tendency to celebrate the inept and lowbrow. Do you spend most of your evenings watching "Flavor of Love" reruns and eating biggie size fries? These actions will have dire consequences for future generations. "Idiocracy" is under an hour and a half and mercifully so. The future is so unappealing and the people so stupid that we are happy to be out of their company sooner than later. The movie also lacks much in the way of narrative drive. It has many funny ideas that never coalesce into a sustainable narrative. Yet, the movie has enough very funny moments, is short enough, and features some good performances from the leads. Luke Wilson carries the movie with his easygoing charm and Maya Rudolph ("SNL") gets solid laughs without trying too hard. It's definitely worth a look on video. Because hardly anyone has seen the film, expect high praise in some corners. It's obscurity and treatment by the studio will lead to overvaluing by many film geeks. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 5 people found the following review useful: Probably the funniest comedies I've ever seen....PERIOD! from United States 16 January 2007 This is not only the funniest but also the most realistic picture of what our society will be like if we don't stop letting the big corporations run our lives for us. Having said that, I don't think this movie has an intrinsic motivation to destroy the benign images of our big corporations who are spending hundreds of millions on embellishing and promoting them. Also, I can't quite blame FOX for tossing this movie away. They didn't really have any other choice since friends should always look out for each other, if you get my drift! I say 10/10 for this hilarious, light-hearted, rightfully toss-away piece of rubbish!! Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 5 people found the following review useful: Talk about addressing the issues of demographics! WARNING : This may be considered a spoiler! Talk about addressing the demographic issues facing developed countries today. This movie highlights the plight of many countries and their population growth in a lower socioeconomic demographic. I was pleased to see it portrayed so humorously and made so accessible. By 2012 my country will be at a population growth standstill and then in decline, yet the 1-2% growth that is taking place up until that time is in the areas around capital cities of low socioeconomic demographic. In a nut shell; the dirt poor are proliferating while the middle income and higher income earners are reducing their breeding levels. As the old surpass the young in population, the young that will be left are to be poorly uneducated, lacking social capital and unable to sustain the economical burden placed on the country by health care and social security etc. All the kids will be dumb, all the smart and affluent will be old and we will see a massive depression never before experienced by 2040. on the bright side, we could all be burned to a crisp by global warming or they may just start killing everyone over 30 like in "Logans Run". look out ol' timers! I loved this movie, it really drives the message home. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 5 people found the following review useful: Where's Kevin Klee? from United States 24 September 2006 This movie was not anywhere near where I live and I and a group of friends had to travel extremely far to see it. We were disappointed that when the movie was released, that it wasn't released everywhere for everyone. We are fans of Mike Judge's work, and Kevin Klee is a local hometown favorite here in south central Illinois. We searched the website and found that his name was not even listed in the credits anywhere that we could find...why is that??? Also, why is Fox (according to an article we read on this subject) allegedly treating this film like it's not worth all of the hard work that obviously went into it?? Judge has done nothing (as far as we know) but produce hit after hit. This movie was definitely better than the "Date Movie" or even "Scary Movie 3" and we should know, because we are fans of these type of movies as well. Will we be able to own this movie on DVD anytime in the near future? What is it going to take to get this movie in a Hillsboro or Pana, IL theater??? Is there somewhere where people can go to vote for or offer support of some kind to get this movie out at more than just a handful of theaters? We just feel it is wrong and terrible and an incredible disservice to Judge fans everywhere. People are gonna love this movie if they ever get a chance to see it. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 5 people found the following review useful: who knew? 20 September 2006 *** This review may contain spoilers *** when we went into the theater the ticket taker told us to be sure we wanted to see this movie as many people walked out and demanded their money back.....that immediately told me this was either a GREAT movie or REALLY bad (and not good bad) and we were told we had a half hour to make our decision.....well....after a half hour of t.v. promos and previews it began and we started laughing and basically didn't stop till it was over.....my friend was practically rolling in the aisle...and there were actually people in the audience....who laughed...and no one walked out...except one couple that walked out the minute the movie started...was it THAT offensive?????? it was free passes well spent!!!!! and no spoiler,i think, but do sit through the credits (if only to honor the people that made this and every other film you see....i feel these people helped make this film , we could at least give them the respect they deserve.....) Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 7 people found the following review useful: oh god, so funny from United States 25 September 2006 This is a laugh-till-you-cry hilarious movie which makes a serious point about modern America. My wife, an English teacher, was immediately asking herself whether she should urge her students to see it (pro: it is an anti-stupidity film, con: it's wonderfully profane and vulgar). She decided, despite the vulgarity, that she would. People are saying it's rough around the edges, and it is, but it really doesn't detract from the movie. This is one of those films that will divide the saints from the assholes---i.e., if you see it and enjoy it, your head's screwed on straight and you're alright, but if you want your money back or don't get it (or, God help you, you're a Fox executive and helped quash it), then you're hopeless and need to go catch the latest Jennifer Anniston crap-for-all. I have not enjoyed a movie this much since I was a kid and saw "The Blues Brothers" for the first time. Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 7 people found the following review useful: Why don't the real idea people getting good budgets? from United States 11 September 2006 First, the negative: I felt the film was uneven and lost steam in the last act. It needed a big twist/idea to finish, as any real science fiction drama does. It didn't introduce a new idea after the first hour, so much of the humor and drama fell flat. The effects were uneven and belied the tight budget...but I can forgive them of that, as humor/satire held sway and makes utter 'believablility' secondary. The positive: Ambition, voice, vision. Mike Judge is now an official hero of mine...he has seen the world for what it is (in his eyes), and decided to make comment in unflinching dark humor. He is to be commended. The first half hour was tightly told and hysterically funny. The real irony for me was that we had just come from a chain restaurant for dinner after visiting a local Costco before seeing the film. What a laugh! And anyone who can't laugh at themselves deserves what they get. Thanks, Mike. from United States 7 September 2006 A friend of mine who saw this movie insisted we go to see it together, and I couldn't' thank him enough. I never even would have know it was in the theaters from the lack of advertising and promotion. I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard during a movie. As far as plot line and character development go, there's not much here, but if you watch it strictly as a satire on how stupid our population gets with each passing year, it's absolutely spot on. The very first five minutes of the movie are worth it, just to scare the hell out of smart people into having more children than the stupid ones. Why didn't this movie get more support from the studio? Did it test badly? If that were the case, then it's stunningly ironic that a move about stupid people would be misunderstood by test audiences. And definitely, definitely stay after the credits... Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 7 people found the following review useful: it isn't great but it's funny and it's mike judge It is sad that fox refused to release this film. (Yes - i know it played a handful of theaters and "technically" got a release). Mike Judge is someone who is at least trying to make films that are different and original. I didn't love it, but i laughed a lot. I wasn't bored - and in this day and age that says a lot. And now here are my other five lines. 1. Go see it. 2. Write to Fox. 3. Tell your friends. 4. Boycott Starbucks. 5. Buy a Buck Owens CD. Was the above review useful to you? 5 out of 9 people found the following review useful: It's Sci-Fi meets Beavis and Butthead...Fun Thrill Ride! from Texas 2 September 2006 I'll use the 1-10 scale for my rating of each quality in this movie. 1 being the worst, 10 being the best. STORY (3/10): Short and to the point. A serious narrator gives insight onto what's happening and how things progress. This movie's plot feels more like an educational show when he speaks. Still, it's not the worst I've seen. This movie is way better than most satire flicks out there. SPECIAL EFFECTS (8/10): One of the better qualities of this movie. You literally feel a fear of heights in some scenes. Most of the magic is done on large scale with George Lucas looking details. The effects are the largest reason I'll give this movie a second viewing when it comes out on DVD. HUMOR/INTEREST (7/10) : I was worried that this movie might be so stupid that it wouldn't be funny. That is, until I started laughing with joy. Tons of jokes and satire in this one, but it's not exactly like the Scary Movie series either. Some parts will have you laughing, others will have you shocked. It's interesting to see how the future had evolved into such a disaster. The debris is real, but not caused by any wars. Man became very stupid, having technology do all the work for them. Most Taboos we have now become positive things in the future. OVERALL: (7/10) You'll probably find this movie cleverly funny. The story is weak, but the humor and incredible effects makes this a thrilling roller coaster ride. Mike Judge fans shouldn't be disappointed at all. Go ahead and see it if you very curious. Was the above review useful to you? 6 out of 11 people found the following review useful: Like a single flower in a mountain of manure. 14 June 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I read many comments before watching this film and was hoping for satire. Unfortunately, satire requires a level of wit and intelligence in order to be valid. Satire is supposed to have a moral theme. The biting social commentary this movie wanted to achieve (I'm hoping, here) was thoroughly drowned out with decidedly adolescent humor. The entire movie rides on the premise that mankind is on the verge of extinction because the entire human race has bred out intelligence. The theory is that smart people breed slowly and carefully while the less intelligent breed like rabbits. While plausible only in the narrowest of considerations it misses the point of "natural selection" by a country mile. If the world's population tipped the balance and became that burdened by people unable to care for themselves, the herd would be thinned long before those people achieved a majority rule. Instead, the thin premise is used to turn scores of credible actors into "homeboys and ho's" throwing the world's raunchiest block party. Children celebrate birthdays in burger joints called Butt-f*ckers (do I need to explain that joke?). H&R Block now pays refunds with prostitutes. Starbucks offers sexual favors with a latte. It's one play on major business after another. While some would still disagree and comment that the movie brilliantly maintains a constant level of irony, I would simply point out that it went beyond caricature and fell into a mire of rude, offensive and damaging portrayal of modern social archetypes. I would much rather see a movie about a pro wrestling president who can give a speech without a single expletive in it. Maybe the entire cabinet could be prostitutes who, secretly, have degrees in political science and finance. People in ridiculous roles that prove that the human race, no matter how pitiful it seems, can still surprise you. I wanted this movie to be a lotus blossom, but it only turned out to be the painted rose from a Cristal bottle. Was the above review useful to you? 6 out of 11 people found the following review useful: A Comedy? Author: beamsterkaas 14 April 2007 Although Idiocracy paints a scarily true future for America, I wonder if that is all it sets out to do. For a movie that advertises itself as a comedy, its humor was surprisingly lackluster. In an idea that was so rich with possible laughs, I found myself laughing at perhaps only 2 or 3 lines. This movie did not make me see the world differently, nor did it make me laugh. It also didn't make me giggle, chuckle, snicker, snort, or, except for a few instances, smile. As Iwatched the movie I could feel my face slowly moving into a look of semi-consciousness. I believe that at one point I began to drool. I'm wondering if whoever bothered to fund this movie read the screenplay first. Was the above review useful to you? 6 out of 11 people found the following review useful: Expected Better from United States 19 January 2007 Anyone saying this was as good or better than "Office Space" must have watched a whole different movie than me. My husband and I both thought "Idiocracy" was idiotic. No, I didn't miss the point. Matter of fact, the point and some of the subtle background humor was more amusing than the plot, characters, acting or jokes. I enjoyed seeing the Mac guy as an imbecile doctor, and I enjoyed pegging other actors and what they were/are known for. That's about where my amusement ends. The story idea was full of potential that really just lacked in execution. It COULD have been clever. It SHOULD have been less over the top... and it WOULD have been more than just a 2 hour fart joke. Wish it had lived up to my expectations. Was the above review useful to you? 6 out of 11 people found the following review useful: Funny but flawed movie-making from United States 1 September 2006 The premise of this movie is one of the best---the dumbing down of America. What the producers of this film project is very scary but seemingly very possible. People talk converse in street talk, ads are everywhere, corporations control everything, and people no longer have to think. I found the satire quite amusing and laughed quite a bit. However, I fear that the average teenager won't get it at all---they won't realize it is satire and will sit in their seats wondering why they should be laughing at those in the film that talk and act like they do. It was scary when we left the theater and we saw the kids outside acting very similar to the dumb Americans of the future as depicted in this film. The film was not the best film-making. The film was narrated a bit and then it stopped and then it would start again (always a bad sign that the director was unable to move the story along cinematically). Some of the story logic did not make sense and there were a few holes in the script. Nevertheless, the premise trumps the bad film-making in this case and I found it to be an enjoyable 80 minutes. Was the above review useful to you? 8 out of 15 people found the following review useful: Like being punched in the brain from United Kingdom 16 August 2008 This is a small budget Mike Judge film (who we all know and love) making a light hearted statement on how stupid we are all becoming, concentrating mainly on the MTV nation. At first it seemed quite daring and exciting for Mike to take a bite from the hand that has fed him for so long. But it was not to be. The film is actually written for the moron audience it is trying to mock. An annoying narrative runs through the entire film with tedious exposition. At one point it actually explains to the viewer why you can't grow "flowers" in a glass of coke. The humour, rather than lampooning people of diminished intellect, is actually aimed at them. There are a few chuckles at exaggerated points of modern day pop culture but after about twenty minutes in, the film suggests it is cool to be a complete idiot and anyone who thinks otherwise should sit back, take a chill pill, chase it with a bottle of bleach and become one of the trendy mindless hordes. The concept is excellent and there are some clever ideas and some funny scenes, but the whole affair is just pretty silly. A weak plot line about the main characters decision to take the reins of his loser existence is clumsy and inconsequential. Some token middle weight actors appear, the production is low budget (never been a problem for Mike before in the past) and surprisingly the sound track is also rather poor. Plot and dialogue are negligible Some people have commented that this film is very clever and you need to look below the surface to see what is actually happening. Maybe this is true and perhaps it is my failing in not seeing this. But that is like putting yourself through 2 hours of electro-shock therapy to build an opinion on the evils of torture. It really isn't necessary to actually experience the pain to know it is bad. Like a torture victim I was praying for unconsciousness but the brashness of the movie kept stirring me awake. Was the above review useful to you? 13 out of 25 people found the following review useful: Idiocracy, wow! from United States 11 January 2007 "Idiocracy" is now on DVD and all I can say is Wow! Well, maybe a mite more than that… I haven't read any reviews that do justice to this movie and I don't expect I'll be the first to do so. Suffice to say, Mike Judge has done more than violate taboos against discussing the consequences of dysgenics. There is a lot more in this movie to keep it out of the theaters. Judge has concocted a vaccine to the mind-numbing meme machine running the West. You can't watch "Idiocracy" and then not laugh at the garbage coming out of the mass media in the guise of "news and entertainment". Indeed, the DVD opens with a mountain range of garbage about to avalanche, and it is such a perfect metaphor for what has been done to the mind of Western Man that one doesn't know whether to split a gut or sit in awe. It's such a relief to watch this movie. I can empathize with the audience instead of seeing the audience as a potentially dangerously dumbed down army of marching morons programmed with zombie morals who (see the movie to get this) are destroying their food production because they believe a sports drink must replace irrigation water "because it has the electrolytes plants crave". Now I'm the first to admit that there is more than mere stupidity going on in the world—that some of the destruction is the result of a peculiar kind of stupidity one might call "unenlightened self-interest". Indeed, my counter to those who say "Never attribute to malice that which can be attributed to stupidity." is "Never attribute to stupidity that which can be attributed to unenlightened self interest." Nor does Judge's storyline do justice to such unenlightened self-interest when he portrays everyone from street hookers to to corporate executives as exhibiting this particular kind of stupidity. The worst unenlightened self-interest we are now experiencing utilizes high intelligence of a kind—a sort of narrow and intense intelligence that just can't keep its fundamentals straight even as it solves problems that are the equivalent of proving the four color map theorem. Is it possible to describe someone with a 180 IQ as merely "stupid" when they grab control of high office and positions of influence while raking in hundreds of millions or even billions of dollars? Of course not—even if they cause the needless deaths of hundreds of millions, including themselves, it is hard to describe them as stupid, although I will admit I do so quite frequently when speaking of them. Indeed one of my main motives for working on artificial intelligence is my sincere hope that the "intelligent" idiots will hear the truth when a machine tells them, with encyclopedic detail and a bibliography-on-demand miles long, exactly how they're being so abysmally stupid in key dimensions. So the movie Judge won't make is the one where some transhumanists start engineering themselves for greater intelligence in zero-sum gamesmanship simply for the purpose of enjoying ever greater dominance over others, while they lose track of the fact that they needed those "stupid white trash hicks" to make the food. Was the above review useful to you? I purchased 6 movies on fios. This is one of them. Author: matthewdiehl 16 January 2017 Great for sound clips during informal meetings. Absolutely hilarious.. One of the best comedies ever. Mike Judge is a genius. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Your review does not contain enough lines - the minimum length for reviews is 10 lines of text. Was the above review useful to you? More hilarious-madcap-mayhem, from the genius that is Mike Judge! from United States 28 December 2016 Spawned from the fertile imagination of Mike Judge, comic genius and creator of Beavis and Butt-Head, Idiocracy is a unique and inspired comedy involving a dystopian future, an endless stream of idiots and a man out-of-time, named Joe. Just imagine for a moment: A futuristic world that is populated on a global-scale, by people who have the IQ's of 70 or lower and the endless array of challenges (of being that stupid) that would create. Once you've imagined that, you've taken your first step into the world of Idiocracy, a world of astonishing stupidity and unceasing lunacy, this is the main gist behind this riotous and vastly under-rated comedy; combined with the awkwardness one would expect to experience in such a world, upon waking from a centuries old slumber. In Idiocracy's case it's a man named Joe who lives out this waking, futuristic nightmare - and makes the best of it..... In the year 2006 the US government was experimenting with cryogenic-suspension and in order to complete their experiment they needed a test-subject. Enter Joe, the most average guy they could find to act as their human guinea pig and along for the ride comes his appointed "mate", a street-walker, named Rita. However, with this experiment "something went terribly wrong" and upon waking some 700 years later, Joe (and Rita) not surprisingly, finds the world to be a very different place. One such difference is that it's inhabited by millions of moron's (perhaps billions) and he encounters countless waves of stupid, degenerate, people of sub-normal intelligence who are effectively retarded. Now all of the sudden Joe (who was "Joe average" in his own time) finds himself to be smartest person in the world, which makes things even more complicated for him and his existence quickly becomes a troubled and challenging one and not necessarily by his own choice. Joe's only crime is the fact that he's much smarter then everyone else and it's his differences among the legions bumbling idiots that drive the story along, eventually Joe's misadventures lead him all the way to the White House and to the President - and in a certain and obvious way Idiocracy, ironically, proves to be: Phrophetic! Idiocracy is a highly effective comedy that's absolutely loaded with laughs and is a completely ridiculous madcap affair and is easily among the funniest movies I've ever had the pleasure of seeing. What else is there to say other than - Mike Judge strikes once again! Watch it if you want to laugh your guts out! Idiocracy is a fully-fledged, authentic and highly original gut-buster of a movie, one that has Mike Judge's creative touch written all over it. Was the above review useful to you? An Indictment of Current Societal Norms 10 October 2015 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Although not particularly brilliant or notable in anything in particular, an army soldier named "Joe Bauers" (Luke Wilson) is ordered to partake in an experiment involving a form of time travel which relies upon cryogenically freezing him to awaken a year later. Likewise, a prostitute named "Rita" (Maya Rudolph) has also been supplied to accompany him. However, things don't turn out as planned and rather than being awakened a year later they accidentally emerge from their pods almost five hundred years afterwards. They immediately discover that the human population has regressed intellectually and as a result the two of them are the smartest people on earth—and society is simply not ready for either of them. Now rather than reveal any more of this movie and risk spoiling it for those who haven't seen it I will just say that this was an entertaining movie which could have been better if it hadn't been so vulgar. Of course, part of the reason for this was to expound upon the crass nature of society today and essentially multiply the effects over the course of time. But the lack of education and ignorance could have easily been played out a bit more fully in some of these scenes instead. In any case, the end result was—ironically enough—a boorish attempt at comedy to illustrate a decline in social mores. In any case, while there weren't necessarily any scenes of a sexually explicit nature, I would recommend this movie for mature audiences only. Was the above review useful to you? Idiot from Perth, Australia 17 August 2015 Idiocracy is something that you know what it will be and when you see it, in this aspect, you aren't let down. But the problem lies in that you know how the film will pan out, every thing from the humour to the story, unfortunately there's nothing unexpected that makes this good. It's a very predictable film, in fact it probably is the most predictable, but despite the potty humour and the annoyingly dumb characters, Idiocracy doesn't arrive to be anything it's not, so hats off to that. Nothing groundbreaking, funny at times, entertaining at times. Just turn your brain off and enjoy the strangeness of this film. However, this is quite possibly the most accurate and terrifying view of what the human race could evolve into, so it does have that weird aspect of that as well. Was the above review useful to you? You won't be able to stop laughing from California, United States 30 October 2014 This movie is so freakin' funny and flies right in the face of corporatism, bad education culture, looming popularity of stupidity in society, and blind patriotic hubris. That's probably why 20th Century Fox Studio execs didn't like the film. Who died and made them God? Although it wouldn't be the first time people that think they know better were wrong about what the public wanted. Jurassic Park was panned by every critic, yet it was huge success at the box office and beyond. That one went right over the critics head -- sad. Not promoting this movie was a bad move on the studio's part, because this film could have been a huge success had it not gotten such paltry promotion and release I felt like I was looking into the scary future of the USA when watching this film, but somehow it was so hilarious Was the above review useful to you? Dystopic satire. 30 October 2014 *** This review may contain spoilers *** This movie was brilliant, and will only become to be known for it's brilliance more and more as time goes by. If you don't get it, or are offended by it, maybe it is just really tough for you to look in the mirror. Or maybe you have been conditioned to the point that anything remotely "politically incorrect" must be a racist right wing conspiracy. Clearly many negative reviews on here are made for political reasons. The real irony is that Fox was afraid of this movie and buried it. Afraid of getting close to telling the truth I guess, as all mainstream media is... (If you are on the left and you don't think MSNBC is as bad as Fox, you need to wake up and watch some Democracy Now! Because none of the mainstream media tells you anything outside of what will keep you from spitting venom at the other side) As far as cries of racism in some of the reviews, I can only laugh. In one review someone says something like "paints all minorities as stupid" Really? Frito was by far the dumbest guy in the movie... a white guy. And how about the trailer park family in the beginning of the movie??? I love dystopian movies, and this one is, by far, hands down, the funniest of all time. I think it was too close to the truth for the mainstream and the politically correct to push or digest though. From a person who disdains both the establishment left and right, I can give this film an unbiased 10 rating with ease. It had me rolling with laughter and nodding my head through most of it. Dax Shepard was brilliant as Frito. I would love to see a director's cut one day, and commentary, but maybe that is asking too much... Was the above review useful to you? A great stupid ride, or is it a stupid great ride? 6 October 2014 *** This review may contain spoilers *** The movie builds up its main theme deeply and kind of seriously even with the use of those funny hill-billy scenes. Then it brings its totally absurd main theme to the maximum level of craziness with that five hundred years leap. Well, this movie brings too many things, such as how did the idiot world keep the main utilities functions going, which are illogical and questionable. But those things went to be one too many that I quit asking questions and just decide to enjoy the crazy movie as an all-out crazy entertainment. Idiocracy offers us the short build jokes, which are easy considering the whole world is already filled with idiots. Thus the jokes are very much enjoyably laughable. Luke Wilson's acting is only standard here. My appreciation for this movie comes purely to the crazy screenplay and the imaginative story, Was the above review useful to you? Very funny, great entertainment. from London UK 5 October 2014 This film was sharp, funny, well written, well acted, and as good as anything I've seen in a long time. DEFINITELY watch this if it pops up online or comes around on the TV. I'll be honest I thought this film was going to be terrible, because the posters, trailers etc looked really cheap and made the film look bad. Couldn't have been more wrong, talk about "don't judge a book by its cover"! Don't judge a film by its cheap halfhearted advance publicity, people. It's getting to the point where I avoid movies that have the most money thrown at their advance publicity because like all advertising, the bigger the budget more desperate they are to sell the product. Was the above review useful to you? This is a very funny movie with a serious message 7 July 2014 *** This review may contain spoilers *** It is in my opinion that very few movies can rock the entertainment establishment. Idiocracy and Passion of Christ are two such movies. No matter how you shake it, the entertainment powers to be do not like people messing with the truth. Idiocracy is OK as a comedy but it was a very brave movie to make. It is a groundbreaking movie that strikes a chord and really makes you think about how our lives are manipulated on a daily basis. Before you play that next video game or watch that next reality show, think to yourself how you are actually playing a character in "Idiocracy". There are certain segments of our society that will never know anything but "Idiocracy". Was the above review useful to you? I used to think this was a farce.... from United States 8 April 2014 I used to think this was a farce, it really was hysterically funny. I laughed a LOT when I saw this. Some of the funniest dialog I've heard in years. The whole time-machine thing where every movie has the traveler waking up to sky-cars and bald-headed geniuses and fabulous technology - food at the push of a button, free transportation for those without their sky-cars handy, street-sweeper-bots that appear whenever the first piece of paper hits the sidewalk. The usual stuff. This movie turns all that on it's head. What a joke, right? Then 2008 came around and look who the voters elected President...And look who they RE-elected President...Yeah, we're pretty much there now, I'd say. Welcome President Comacho! Was the above review useful to you? The Future from United States 15 December 2013 After working in the public school system as well as law enforcement I can honestly say that this movie is not far off of the mark of future potentiality! With our crumbling educational institutions, lack of parental structure and the blame everyone or everything else attitude then this is painfully close to the future and if you take a look around at some neighborhoods in the U.S. or just turn on the news then it is quite likely a current reality. Some may even find it offensive. Those people are probably the ones that this movie is pointing at. This movie is a great example of who should breed and who should not as well! This movie is sure to challenge ridiculous new age beliefs that we are destined for a greater and higher consciousness by simply feeling good. This movie shows that if you want to make an omelet then you have to break some eggs and does so in a most unapologetic and brutal fashion. Idiocracy was most certainly meant to be a silly movie but inadvertently turned into a documentary. Was the above review useful to you? Great and underestimated from Germany 10 October 2013 I stumbled upon this movie by accident. I'm not even sure, if it has been released in Germany... But thats not important.... I like this Trash. And, to be honest, it IS trash! It is stupid, it is fun, but it does the thing, its accusing people: Making fun of the weak... Stop... No, that wrong... It LOOKS like doing that, but it don't. This movie is a mirror. What is shown there, isn't 500 years away: It is near future. Stupidity is AHEAD. When you realize this, it is the point, when you choke on your laughing. So to the people portrayed in the beginning of the movie (Those WITH brains!): Be so kind and reproduce. But before that: Watch this movie and get a good laugh.. It is trash and B- or even C-Movie. But it is trash you can enjoy and trash that makes you think... (What,to be honest, doesn't make this movie "c". Oh what the F*** ! Watch it!!!! Was the above review useful to you? Amazing 26 July 2013 *** This review may contain spoilers *** First time ever hearing about this movie was this year, it must have slipped my radar. Knowing it was a ridiculous comedy, i suspended my intellect and sat down wanting to be absurdly entertained. Idiocracy defines itself, limiting any true comedy that would make one cry from laughter and presenting forth a story of outrageous scientific theory and retardation. Joe participates in a military experiment gone wrong, and winds up 500 years into the future with a companion hooker as humanity has degraded mentally into uneducated buffoons incapable of even realizing water grows plants. Society is stuck in neutral, actually starting to shift in reverse when Joe fights his way out of prison, eluding capture, and grabbing the attention of the president with his IQ test score. Joe winds up serving as secretary of the interior of the united states and is forced to prove his intellect solving crop problems, trash pile up, and the cultural and economic dependence on carl's jr and brawndo corp. Joe and his Hooker Rita wind up saving the day, escaping a rehabilitation death trap with Beef Supreme, and ultimately becoming the President of the United states. The movie is fun, and should not be taken seriously what so ever. With that being said, if you have 90 minutes with nothing else to do for the night, with or without intoxication, this movie can at the very least put a smile on your face. Was the above review useful to you? One of my favorite comedies from United States 23 July 2013 Very funny movie that brings about the question, what would happen if the dumb people with lower IQ at too many kids while smarter people with high IQ choose not to have kids? Many of these jokes are very memorable, from the Costco, to Fuddruckers, to Starbucks, to Gatorade, this movie has many good laughs. Idiocracy is about an average guy who takes part in a human hibernation experiment, but the facility closes down while Joe and Rita are forgotten for 500 years. Since throughout history, more dumb people have children than smarter people, society becomes very stupid (they use Gatorade to water their crops). Joe ridiculously turns out to be the smartest guy "in history". The movie shows how he attempts to give advice to a hopeless society. Was the above review useful to you? Good sci-fi comedy from United Kingdom 10 May 2011 Idiocracy, a movie about a future society of dumbed down humans, is dumb in itself - it's a silly movie about silly people - but very enjoyable at the same time. It's not a massive thought provoker but a fun ride into the realms of sci-fi comedy. It would have been nicer if it'd gone a bit deeper but it works and the depiction we are given of this "stupid" future is highly original and thought provoking. It's low brow comedy that also remains very intelligent at the same time - a rare trick. The style reminded me a bit of Woody Allen's "Sleeper", but not too much. It has a style and charm of it's own and remains very original. Definitely worth watching if you like the genre or if you're just a comedy fan. Was the above review useful to you? Funny, entertaining- it's just not the film it could've been, thanks to Fox. from Australia 20 April 2011 IDIOCRACY is a film that is set 500 years in the future and shows how stupid the human race has been. The film was discarded by Fox, leaving the cutting of the film messy and the film unpolished. It's sometimes clever, with by stating that the human race got stupider by the Oscar- winning film was just a picture of an ass. It's an entertaining movie, with Luke Wilson perfect for the role. However, with the fart jokes it seems that the film is becoming what it is making fun of- a really dumb picture of society. Its somewhat elitist in the way that it demeans people that are less intelligent. While it is funny at first, it runs tiresome throughout the film, and it only breaks new ground by being as ridiculous as possible. The future that it depicts is serious, and a lot of the films merit lies in the way that it makes the viewer think, even if it for ten minutes. The film could've explored more about human behaviour, the effects of apathy, but in the 80 minute time frame, simple it must be. Its funny, entertaining, but it is frustrating to watch how this movie could've been better by exploring more into its themes, trying to find new laughs and not coming across as hypocritical sometimes Was the above review useful to you? brilliant! from Richardson, TX 19 February 2011 This movie was really funny. Leonard Maltin gave it a surprisingly good review, and I found out that he was right. Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph are singled out for an Army project to be placed in hibernation for a year to have their DNA preserved so that the human race can be salvaged. Unfortunately, the commander gets busted for prostitution, the base gets torn down, a Fuddruckers gets put up in its place, and they are forgotten about for the next 500 years, when they are awaken to find that dumb people have taken over.(due to evolution:watch for the forshadowing explanation at the beginning with the smart and dumb families.) Watch for all the sight gags (a la Naked Gun) and all the jokes in this movie-it was actually well done despite a fair amount of gross-out humor. (what else can you expect from the same guy who brought us Beevis & Butthead?) I did not regret getting this movie. You might like it. ** 1/2 out of **** 12 September 2008 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I watched this movie 2 years after it had been released because I had never heard of it. A coworker loaned me the DVD and insisted that I had to see it, because we are constantly commenting on how stupid society is becoming (we work in a call center and deal with the dregs of society who call in because they cannot follow the simplest of directions, so we're a bit jaded already). He said it was his favorite movie and one of the greatest social comedies of all time. Plus I've always appreciated Mike Judge's body of work in general so I thought I was in for one of those overlooked gems I occasionally come across. I really wish this movie hadn't been built up so much, because that is part of the reason it fell a bit short of expectations. There is a lot to appreciate about this movie. Conceptually it is brilliant. The casting was good. And I applaud the message intended. There were some great moments and some very profound humor worthy of the likes of Mark Twain and Will Rogers (who?). The doctor in the hospital made me partially inhale my beverage. The destruction of Frito's car and the fact that his obsession with violence overrode his realization that it was his car was almost sublime. The acceptance by the presidential cabinet of the notion that the plants were talking to Joe Bauers and telling him they wanted water was a pretty sophisticated portrayal of stupidity as kind of retarded mysticism, like Attila the Hun's obsession with magic. Sounds like I should have loved this movie, right? I did like it, but I was far from blown away, which is sad because I really wanted to be blown away, and I think it could have been a very important social comedy along the lines of Dr. Strangelove if it had been done properly. I think the problem was with delivery. This movie must have looked amazing on paper, because the jokes are sound. The movies looks like a movie that was rushed and didn't really get the attention it deserved. I understand that it had been somewhat abandoned by the sponsoring studio, and it shows. And the movie contains one major flaw. The entire "rehabilitation" sequence was either badly conceived, badly executed, or shouldn't have been in the movie at all. It seems like a filler sequence that is only there because there was not material to fill a feature-length film (although I disagree with that), and it just runs the premise into the ground. On top of that, the whole thing is boring and almost completely unfunny. It was at this point that I started losing interest. Perhaps the best thing about this movie is that, despite it's shortcomings, there is still a lot to talk about. This is exactly why I was so disappointed, because there IS a lot to talk about, and a film that could have achieved greatness and could have had a lot more exposure did not. Oh well. Life goes on. I think you should see this film if you have not, just don't go into it expecting greatness and you will probably be okay. Was the above review useful to you? sit back, relax, and get ready to laugh. from United States 19 August 2008 Idiocracy is a movie for anyone who wants to laugh. Its a great about two people who agree (due to having bad lives) to be the guinea pig for a top secret government experiment. The two people (Joe and Rita) sleep in a pod for supposedly one year, however, when they wake up it has been several years into the future. Joe is thoroughly confused while Rita (at first) doesn't think much of it. However, as the adventure goes on, they soon realize that the worlds population has become extremely dumb. And Joe and Rita (who before, were probably below average) are the smartest people. With their help, they try to bring the world back to intelligence and order. Great comedy worth watching. I rate this 7/10. Rated R for language and sex-related humor Was the above review useful to you? Brilliant idea, poor execution. from United States 7 August 2008 Frankly, I think everyone would like to know what the future is going to be like. And Idiocracy gives us a look at our so called future. I somewhat agree on the movie's message, because every day we human beings are dumbing down, and who knows what we would be like 500 years from now. The idea of the movie is wonderful, however we see the writers wasting a brilliant chance, and that is how they wrote the film, and how there weren't many laugh out loud moments. Luke Wilson does his best playing his character, but I was still expecting more hilarious jokes. Idiocracy is not a bad film, it just did not meet my expectations. 6.5/10 14 July 2008 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Idiocracy is by no means a great film. But if you want something to mildly entertain you late at night one day, it'll surely suffice. I just watched it on cable, and as it started thought 'oo00oo Mike Judge' as I love Office Space. Idiocracy isn't quite as good, but it's not too far behind. Kind of like nineteen eightyfour, only idiotic, would be a good way to describe it. I laughed out loud quite a few times, and there were a few genuinely clever bits of dialogue (The narrator explaining the evolution of what had become modern language, and ending with 'various drunks' comes to mind). If your expecting an intelligent yet humorous exploration into the potential dangers of our obsession with products and mundane entertainment. You will be disappointed. If you just want a stupid movie to entertain you, you'll probably agree with me that the film is about a 7/10. (I also know that many people who watch this at 13, will love it throughout their youth, thus DVD sales will probably increase in 5-10 years) 7/10 (reviewed after first viewing) from Central Texas 3 May 2008 I've not much to say about this movie other than it is probably not too far off the mark as to where our society is heading. Look no further than Huxley's "Brave New World" to see the same idea of "Idiocracy" fleshed out in a much more profound manner. That being said, perhaps profound was not what the writers and director was looking for. I am a great fan of "King of the Hill" due mainly to its social commentary, which at times is fantastic, as it is in this movie, but it appears the movie was hampered possibly by a small budget or lack of studio support as the idea behind it was excellent, but the end product comes out disappointing. Stinging commentary with overdone absurdity. Was the above review useful to you? Bloody brilliant! from Australia 25 March 2008 I laughed myself sore on this one. If it was shown at the cinema I would have been very happy to have paid the cost of a ticket. Even the opponents of the movie have to give it one thing, this is a plot that hasn't been done to death. How is it possible that this movie doesn't get a decent go from the studio but predictable worn out spoof comedies the likes of scary movie series do? If you think about the premise seriously it is entirely possible, I have associates in various IQ and social brackets and the more lowbrow of them do spawn a lot more offspring than the highbrows. Mike Judge should be proud of this one. Was the above review useful to you? Idiotic & crazy BUT not unlikable 16 March 2008 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Luke Wilson & Maya Rudolph play 2 likable but dim bulbs of today & wake-up 500 years in the future as the smartest people on earth. As idiotic & crazy as this sounds,this comedy farce succeeds because of the likability of these two plus Dax Shepard. To me,if the main characters are to some degree likable, the film no matter how weak it may be becomes watchable. I only laughed a few times, BUT at no point did I want to shut this fast 84 minute farce off. The rest of the cast do good jobs & the production credits are what you would expect. The film had only a brief release,I feel the main reason for this is: it is not a major first run movie, It belongs on the lower half of a double feature, as many current release belong. Theatres are charging as much as $14 to see movies today, I feel about 80 % of them are not worth even a $ 3 tariff. IDIOCRACY is fine for a rental fee at NETFLIX or in the bargain bin at your local rental outlet or for viewing on cable. I did not really like this movie that much, BUT I sure did not hate it or want to shut it off. Ratings: **1/2 (out of 4) 77 points(out of 10) IMDb 7 (out of 10) Was the above review useful to you? A Not-Too-Unusual Expectation of Humanity's Future from United States 27 February 2008 An average military man -- average in every way -- and a local prostitute are frozen, to be awakened in one year. But they are forgotten and left to sit for 500 years until their chambers are broken open in The Great Garbage Avalanche of 2505. Now the average man finds himself to be the smartest man on earth (due to stupid people having more children than smart people) and must solve their problems while also trying to find a time machine to return him to his own time. The first half of this film is hilarious and a great social critique -- it parodies our love of such stupid things as "America's Funniest Home Videos" and our growing reliance on corporate sponsorship and catering -- Starbucks, Carl's Jr and a Gatorade knockoff are prominent throughout the film. And the introduction, explaining dysgenics, is dead-on accurate and hilarious... the poor and less educated do tend to have more children than the wealthy and well-educated. I have my doubts that intelligence itself is hereditary, but to some extent it could be true. Luke Wilson has always been the stronger Wilson brother in the acting department and he really is the strong point of this film. Maya Rudolph isn't particularly funny, talented or even good looking. She wasn't a great casting choice to offset Wilson, leaving him to carry this project alone. But he does it. Dax Shepard does precious little besides act stupid; Justin Long is funny but has far too small a role. My biggest concern with the film, besides the waning humor (more time ought to have gone into the second half of the script) is the complete disregard for explaining how things work. For as stupid as the population is, they still have advanced technology and well-run businesses. Who maintains this? Who does the repairs? Sure, I'm not supposed to think about this, but as a film targeting an intelligent audience to belittle the less intelligent, I have no choice but to think about the film critically. I don't know what more to say on this one. Is it Mike Judge's best work? Probably not. I think some of the jokes are funnier than "Office Space", but "Office Space" overall is the much stronger film. So, I can't really praise it all that much. The first fifteen minutes is funny, the next fifteen is alright and it generally goes downhill from there after the gimmick of a stupid America wears off (the rest of the world isn't explained). Well worth watching, very quotable, but still remains somewhat disappointing. Was the above review useful to you? Hilarious and an overall good movie from United States 20 February 2008 I enjoyed this movie a lot. This is one of those off-the-wall story lines that is delivered very well. The movie will make you realize just how many things would be different if everybody was a moron. The way you would act, the TV shows you would watch, the things you would create and the movies you would like .... would all be completely different. Mike Judge captures all of these little details and turns them into big laughs. I found more of these laughs in the first half of the movie. The second half tapered off a bit so it could add a bit of a cheesy B movie ending. Still, the movie was very entertaining. I also agree with some of the other posts that the movie could have been a little more polished. Overall, I got a lot more entertainment from this movie than about 90% of the trash that gets released nowadays. Was the above review useful to you? Unique and great fun from United Kingdom 13 February 2008 Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson) is a lazy U.S Army soldier who due to his lack of family and friends and his distinct averageness is selected to participate in an experiment to cryogenically freeze a human subject for one year. The military have also selected a prostitute – Rita, played by Maya Rudolph – for the experiment and together with Joe they are left locked away within their tubes for one year. Unfortunately for them they are forgotten and awaken 500 years later in a world populated and run by idiots. On their adventures to hopefully locate a time machine that can return them home Joe and Rita encounter a vast array of characters including a doctor, lawyer and the President of the United States – all are obsessed with money, sex and fame and all blindly follow the call of large corporate advertising to the detriment of their own free will (the irony is apparent and in many ways this film cuts frighteningly close to the bone), consequently the world is in chaos and after discovering that Joe is in fact the smartest human on the planet he is ordered by the President to fix everything in one week. This film could have been so very bad but thanks to some brilliant dead-pan delivery from Luke Wilson and some equally dry wit from Maya Rudolph the film manages to stay together throughout. Idiocracy is at times genuinely funny and more often then not, amusing. However these gems are often mired by moments of base humour that are both unfunny and unwelcome. Thankfully they never seem to drag the film low enough to spoil what is otherwise a very fun movie with great characters, set pieces and modern cultural references (the slander of giants like Starbucks and Costco not only provide avid amusement but also contain a sense of (albeit far fetched) realism). This isn't a masterpiece and don't expect any real thought-provoking satire but I don't think Mike Judge wanted it to be either. At its heart it is just a fun idea executed and performed in a fun way. In fact that one word is perfect for Idiocracy: fun. Brilliant fun. Was the above review useful to you? good from United Kingdom 5 February 2008 ideocrasy to sum up was typical "again". but i am giving this movie a high recommendation because the movie is simply well good, i really compliment the storyline as it makes sense in comparison to other movies the story is simple. The main theme is comedy and if your old and have a retarded imagination you would find the idiots jokes funny, it was simply overwhelming how a story could be told out in such a way under such weird circumstances. say for example the stock characters who travel in time have no life's at all and are so average the statistics almost become impossible. some people may be a bit confused by what i just wrote but it is true, eventually the entire world becomes "sub average" and inadequately dumb as the average balance has been taken away due to the army being knocked down and the experiment forgotten about, they eventually grow so dumb they replace their water supply for crops with fizzy pop and are some how confused about why the plants arn't growing but the travelling man eventually becomes shocked by how stupedic the people are and by being the most intelligent person in the world becomes president and is in a mission to save the human race from sheer dumbness to be honest. all in all i recommend the movie to comedy fans and to queries book readers, really really really typical!!! Was the above review useful to you? No wonder this didn't get a wide release from United States 17 January 2008 In a few words, this movie is just not that funny. It is actually pretty damn boring. When I first heard about this movie, I thought to myself, "Now that sounds funny." I was wrong. While channel surfing one morning after a night of reindeer games, I happened across this "gem" of a film I had read was flat out funny. All I saw was ridiculous situations and just your usual, "My God you are stupid" jokes. Now I understand that I will never be a fan of Mike Judge because I have never EVER found anything he has done to be humorous at all. I wanted to like this film because it had every chance in the world of being incredibly funny and being a classic i would want to relive every month or so. However, I was wrong. After sitting through this waiting for the funny to happen, I realized I was waiting for a dinosaur to come around the corner. I was waiting for something that would never happen. And I don't blame the stars. The performances were OK, nothing memorable, but it just never caught on. This is just one of those movies that did not work at the end of the day. Was the above review useful to you? Surprisingly very funny from United States 15 January 2008 I wasn't sure what to expect out of Idiocracy, but this refreshingly ludicrous take on the future seems very prolific given the rapid decline in standards amongst our younger population... This movie paints a funny but dreary look on life 500 years from now, where idiots rule and sports drinks are "What plants crave". I laughed my ass off the whole movie, as ridiculous as the concept is I thought the movie was very well done... Imagine everyone speaking and acting like drunk hillbillies and anyone with any articulate vocabulary is considered a criminal... I certainly appreciate Mike Judge's humor, and I thought office space was very funny and a classic, but I think this movie was even funnier, a gem that seems to be highly underrated Was the above review useful to you? What If Fans of "King of the Hill" Took Over the World? from Boston 15 January 2008 A friend of mine threw Idiocracy into the DVD player while we were doing a computer rebuild just to have something on in the background. I dimly recalled hearing about the movie when it came out, but because Fox didn't do any marketing, I had no expectations about the movie beyond my friend's comment that it had its moments. Three days later the movie still haunts me to the point where I had to come here and post a review. This doesn't mean that I think that Idiocracy is a perfect movie. It has logic holes so big you could drive a monster truck through them. But somehow, I think this is part of the point of the film. If it got everything right, it could have gone down as one of the great dystopian sci-fi classics of the ages, but that's not this movie's goal. Its goal is humor with a message, a much more honorable goal in an era where horror surrounds us on all sides. Idiocracy parodies itself even as it's making important points about the direction that the world is headed. Or at least America. No, this movie isn't going to solve any of the problems it presents in alarming and almost horrifyingly believable detail. This isn't going to make any movie critic's top 100 lists anytime soon, but I'll argue that it's a movie that most Westerners will see something familiar lurking in the background. Using all those images, archetypes and visuals that our subconscious minds have absorbed since birth, it warns you while it makes you laugh. I can only hope that this film becomes another cult hit for Mike Judge. Was the above review useful to you? A couple diamonds in a lot of rough from United States 2 January 2008 As a whole, Idiocracy is a pretty bad movie. The narration, for starters, really dumbs things down, which isn't the smartest thing to put in a movie that is about dumbing down. The last half hour is virtually laugh free and also very stupid. And Maya Rudolph, despite being one of the main characters, could have been cut from the film completely and you wouldn't even know anything was missing. Not to mention her whole prostitute gag isn't even remotely funny, yet she commands a significant amount of screen time, sucking the life out of the movie frame by frame. So why a 7 out of 10? Because despite its numerous flaws, its been nearly a year since I've first seen Idiocracy and I still regularly quote the movie and it still comes up in conversations between my friends and I. In Idiocracy's future of the damned, there are some over the top ideas of what a low IQ society would be like. And in present day America, I regularly see things that aren't too far off. For instance, in Idiocracy, Carl's Jr. offers everything with "Big Ass Fries!" Almost by coincidence, Idiocracy contains a shot of Fuddrucker's, which has menus that downplay their sensibly sized burgers but champion their "will cause diabetes" sized items. I'm pretty sure that if you order a salad at Fuddruckers, the cashier is instructed to call you a pussy. It goes on from there. The overt sexuality in advertising, the lowest common denominator movies and TV shows, news broadcasts that will do anything to avoid being boring, pornstar/ fighter presidents, a costco that offers everything (from furniture to law degrees), most of these ideas are worth a laugh or two, but they're much funnier when you start to see similar things happening right now. Idiocracy is still a pretty bad movie, but I highly recommend that everyone see it and take what they can from it. Was the above review useful to you? Sometimes misses it's mark, but is overall unforgettable from United States 1 January 2008 I saw this film back in May when it was released directly to video. It was admittedly surprising that it didn't receive a theatrical release, not only because of it's A-List leading man Luke Wilson, but also because of the usual cult following of Mike Judge. Judge has made a name for himself as director of "Beavis & Butt-Head Do America" and "Office Space", and would no doubt have attracted a bigger following with this movie had it been released in theaters. I'll admit when I first saw this movie, I absolutely hated it. It's not because I thought the premise was bad. If anything, I thought the movie echoed "Forever Young" (1992), and has the same farsical concerns about the future as the novels "Farenheit 451" by Ray Bradbury, "Brave New World" by Aldous Huxley, and "The Time Machine" by H.G. Wells. Truth be told, the movie at first didn't strike me as funny. It appeared to me at first to be the same mashing of fart jokes, tiresome kick-in-the-crotch/hit-in-the-head humor, and increasingly outdated homophobic jokes that constituted "Scary Movie 4", "Date Movie", and "Epic Movie". I still stand by the fact that these jokes tended to go a little too overboard in scenes, almost hammering the point of this movie in too often. Plus, I thought it extremely hypocritical for the creator of "Beavis & Butt-Head" to accuse Americans of being dumbed down by mindless media. However, "Beavis & Butt-Head", like this movie, is intended as a farce. Plus, the movie suggests that the eventual spread of obtuseness is caused primarily by the uneducated "redneck" archetypes reproducing (sometimes with each other's relatives), while many smart people (with PhD's and other advanced education) hold off on having children until they find they missed their mark. I thought that point was well made in the beginning of the movie. More good things about the movie include the performances of Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph. Wilson plays the part of the reluctant average guy as well as he does in other movies, and it's hilarious how he becomes a sane man in an increasingly insane world. This part could have been played by a satirical, angrier comedian like George Carlin, Chris Rock, or Jason Lee, who expressed their astonishment at a world gone completely wrong. But Wilson does a pretty good job given what he has to work with. Rudolph is also great in this movie, and is truly one of the most talented comediennes to come off of "Saturday Night Live". She has the unfortunate disadvantage of being part of the least funny SNL period in a decade, but she's nonetheless an excellent character actress who shines in this movie. The movie's take on politics is also sharp and ambitious, as Terry Crews (who has had his share of bad movies, but is nonetheless, like Rudolph, a very good character actor) demonstrates as the President who was elected not for his intelligence, but for his entertainment credentials. It sort of reminds you of our current president. Overall, the movie tries too hard to push the humor in some areas, but is a witty satire nonetheless. I wish the movie could have made up its mind which audience they wanted to appeal to, but I give it a mild recommendation. Was the above review useful to you? It's not bad but it could have been better from Argentina 22 December 2007 I have enjoyed pretty much some of Mike Judge's work from Beavis and Butthead,when it was on MTV,to King of the Hill,without forgetting the brilliant film Office Space.But,on some occasions,his satire is so subtle that it finally disappears,like in the case of Beavis and Butthead;when it started on MTV,the programme worked as an excellent parody.But,then,the parody and the satire finished being so subtle,that it was difficult to find some satire.His film Idiocracy is partially guilty of that.But,at the same time,the satire this film offers is so basic and obvious that it's difficult to take it seriously.The premise was ingenious but the screenplay does not develop it well.This film had good intentions but the execution is not too good because the screenplay says the same all the time.Also, the film has some tired and boring moments.I do not want this to seem as a negative commentary:except for some moments,the film kept me fun.Also,it has a few good moments of satire.Idiocracy could have been better and it's a failed satire.But,for the positive sight,it's a frequently fun film with some moments which made me think.And I appreciated that. Was the above review useful to you? Mike Judge does it again from United States 19 December 2007 I never laughed so hard in my life! Mike Judge hilariously shows us where we are and where we are headed. The satire is spot-on, and even the toilet humor, because of its placement, works on every level. This film just might go down as the first overlooked film of the 21st century, the first cult classic, etc. I prefer to think of this film as a HUGE mistake on FOX's part to make any sort of profit. How the execs in the board room passed on this comedic gem is such a mystery. Snappy writing, adequate acting, and comedic delivery/timing make "Idiocarcy" the one film you should have in your household when you need a great laugh. This comment was brought to you buy Carl's Jr.! Was the above review useful to you? The fact that this movie was made is better than the actual movie from the wild frontier 27 November 2007 The general consensus seems to be that this movie is mediocre. I don't disagree--it's a f##king mess. The horrible editing and flow is clearly due to Fox's tampering, but beyond that, the humor is too broad for my taste, and Judge's premise isn't even particularly well thought out (what's the rest of the world doing while America decays?). In reality, I'm not convinced things are nearly this dire, and an argument can even be made in the opposite direction (a book called "Everything Bad is Good for You" claims, semi-convincingly, that modern media is more complex than ever before and may be making people smarter). BUT: the movie's originality and ballsiness redeems it. Judge gathers all the worst elements of American society under one roof--it's almost too much to take in--and flatly states that they are stupid and worthless. The total ugliness of the sets is a disturbing vision of the fast food and department store industries dominating every aspect of architecture. The parts with the President are the highlight: there is really no difference between the cavemen flocking around President Comacho and the hopeless 25% cult that continues to support our current real-world president no matter what he says or does; he could announce that he is going to blow up the moon or something and his followers would applaud him. (Update: there is a new president since I wrote this, but as far as I can tell, the comparison remains.) The whole movie is just stating the obvious (specifically, that industrial attempts to keep citizens fat and happy have worked way too well) but all other movies of recent years have been too polite or cowardly to bring up the subject at all. The rushed editing really just adds to the fun, making it feel more like an exasperated rant by Mike Judge than a movie. Maybe the fact that it has finally found a cult audience after all will inspire other brave filmmakers to tackle the subject more coherently in the future. Until then, a better, and scarier, look at where our culture may be headed is "Series 7: The Contenders." Was the above review useful to you? Possibly the most underrated film of the last five years from Worcester, MA 17 November 2007 Mike Judge's work is rather hit and miss for me. "Beavis and Butthead" was hilarious and "Office Space" was amusing if overrated, but "King of the Hill" is a bit too much of a sitcom for my liking. His finest work, "Idiocracy", is also his most unfortunately overlooked. Whether it was the attack on major corporations in the film or if Fox just didn't have faith in it, the film did absolutely no business. It played in only six states I believe and was dumped onto DVD with little to no advertising. This is a shame, because its a really special film. The screenplay combines very crude and puerile (if funny) humor with some actually insightful and intelligent commentary. Like all of Judge's work, the film risks being mistaken exactly for whats its lambasting. The film's technical levels are only average. The main characters are likable but rather undeveloped. As a director, Mike Judge is half decent and the film is quickly paced, but at only eighty or so minutes its far too short. Still, the film's commentary on the increasing dumbing down of the average American and how major media refuses to acknowledge any intelligence on the audience's behalf is both too true and quite daring for a film to say. The film is both hilarious and presenting of a dystopia that seems both all too frightening and possible. "Idiocracy" is possibly the most underrated film of the last five years, and hopefully it'll find its audience on home video. (7/10) Was the above review useful to you? A decent critique of where we are headed from United States 10 November 2007 It isn't too surprising that Mike Judge's "Idiocracy" did terribly at test screenings. Many of the people watching the film may have been missing the jokes because they were the exact type of people being depicted. This movie, starring the deadpan Luke Wilson and the sexy Maya Rudolph, imagines what would happen to our society if all of the worst current trends took hold and became the norm. The movie levels criticism at rampant commercialization and commodification, corporate dominance, lack of education and literacy, obsession with violence and sexual exploitation, and a host of other societal ills. Although its critique of society is reasonably well laid out, "Idiocracy" deals with race in an inappropriate manner. Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph's characters are "frozen" (à la Austin Powers), and, after some unexpected events, wake up about 500 years later. The world is in a state of disrepair where TV rules and intelligent people are nonexistent. The dystopian future created by Mike Judge is often funny and clever in its stupidity. The dialogue is well done and the problems that face the imagined world in 2505 are relevant to our current ones. The movie simultaneously elicits laughs are and sighs when we think about how ridiculous the situations are but then realize how similar they are to the real world. This movie can appeal to someone who "gets" all the references and critiques as well as someone who doesn't, and that is its main deficiency. In appealing to a larger audience, it is forced to dumb itself down somewhat and rely on slapstick humor or weak plot devices. However, the most troubling aspect of the film is how it deals with race. In the hopeless future presented in the film, the government is headed up by a clueless black president. Latino accents are also often used in a very negative way and are associated with stupidity. Luke Wilson's character, a white male, has a very positive role in the film while Maya Rudolph's character is a prostitute. It also seems that there are more people of color as extras in the wide angle shots than in an average Hollywood film. In a film that could serve as a wake up call to society, or any film for that matter, it is inappropriate to use racial stereotypes and imply that people of color aren't as intelligent or as capable as white people. It is important to realize that the current destructive trends in society are often the result of the actions of white people. The pre-emptive war in Iraq is a perfect example. The bungling response to Katrina is another. Obviously, a film like this shouldn't bear the burden of educating people about structural racism and systemic oppression, but it also shouldn't fall into the same traps that it should be criticizing. The film is funny. The plot is weak, but the gags are entertaining. The general message is on the money, but the treatment of race is highly problematic. 6 out of 10 13 October 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I never hear about this film until i saw it in DVD, i love the work of Mike Judge especially whit Beavis and Butt-head so i buy the DVD. I really enjoy this great film and for me it s shame that this film wasn't release in the cinemas here in Mexico City because is an intelligent comedy whit very good points. The plot is good but for me was a little short but still i like it. Luke Wilson is just great like the rest of the cast but for me the best part is the message that Mike Judge put in the film: we need to read books, to watch films,music, to keep learning every day and forget all the TV crap. The best scenes? For me the film "Ass" is very funny, the president that also is a porn star and a WWE star and the "time machine" whit Chaplin as a Nazi. As a conclusion: watch this film, is a very intelligent comedy about a near and sad future. 9.5 out of 10 DVD: is just OK because it doesn't have a lot of extra material but is great that at least we can watch this film in this format. Deserves to be in my collection. Was the above review useful to you? It was a great concept, but not the best way to put it on a film from Mexico 11 October 2007 It was good but not great. The concept of the movie was great and original but I feel that it wasn't very well developed. The plot didn't convince ,e at all, I think it was little weak and with some flaws on it. Although it has some funny moments, in general the jokes were kinda stupid and pointless. The cast was barely good. Luke Wilson is such a talented actor, but this role definitely wasn't for him, his acting seemed forced. Also Maya Rudolph wasn't good, she is a very good comedian but his performance was weak. To conclude it was a barely entertaining movie. It was a great idea but it wasn't the best way to do it. Was the above review useful to you? Really funny but flawed movie, must watch more than once to appreciate from United States 28 September 2007 I have to give this movie a 8 because I've watched it several times and I rarely watch a movie more than once. I still crack up at some parts and catch new sight gags in it. It's a really funny movie with great gags and easy to watch. This film has it's problems though. First, if adult language bothers you, don't watch it. The language is used to show how a dumbed down society would talk but it's profuse. Second, the framing is often poor, there are too many sight gags per shot that you miss most of them. In addition, some shots are too quick, too far away, too small or too cluttered for you to get the subtle humor in it. For example, it wasn't until the third time I watched the movie that I could see that one of the main drinks of the future was Nas-tea. Finally, the movie lacked an ending, it just sort of fades away without leaving you with a last laugh or happy feeling. There is one last gag after the credits but in addition to be poorly placed it doesn't add anything for the movie. Even with all those flaws, it's still one of my favorite comedy movies. Was the above review useful to you? Amusing dialog, but not much else ... from United States 24 September 2007 Idiocracy is a mildly amusing movie. Its best feature is the dialog - it's very crazy and somewhat clever. If you've seen the director/writer's "Beavis and Butt-head" cartoon series on MTV, the dialog is exactly like that. Basically, the story is about an average guy and a prostitute who are accidentally left in a suspended state for several hundred years. When they emerge, the world is populated and run by virtually brain-dead 'idiots'. If you step back and look at the situation and the things that are happening, it's very funny to think about. But when you're watching it, it's not that funny and kind of drags from scene to scene. The one thing this is amusing is the clever 'idiot' dialog. It's not quite funny, but is somewhat creative. Everybody (except the two lead characters) talks that way and acts really zany. There's just no spark though. Unless you're a mega-fan of "Beavis and Butt-head" (and I mean way beyond a normal fan), you'll soon tire of the lackluster pace and the movie's failure to deliver laughs. Was the above review useful to you? Spot on premise, poor delivery. 24 September 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Don't get me wrong, it was a decent movie overall. But the big selling point in my opinion was the premise of the movie. It's near terrifying to see in the opening minutes of the movie are dead on, saying that our future is deemed stupid and ignorant because of the fact that Darwin's principle law is found to be ineffective under the conditions for the human race. The narrator sums it up nicely. So the movie should be suggested for the premise, not for the actual movie because it was not the greatest I've seen. Not horrible though. The problem was that it seems the movie had no work done on it after FOX gave it the heave-ho and thusly it came out as more of an independent work: Good idea, horrible plot line. Luke Wilson plays a decent character, although he sells it short in many ways. The other supporting characters are no one that anyone has heard of, but they play their separate parts with their own kind of grace, though that's not the word that would be best for these roles. In the end, I'd recommend this movie to shock people into thinking differently for our futures, rather than for a laugh. There are better ways to garner a laugh from a movie. Was the above review useful to you? A funny, but truly frightening vision of a very possible future! 13 August 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Forget THINGS TO COME, forget STAR TREK or any other quasi-utopic sci-fi you've seen: THIS movie is EXACTLY the future we're sowing for ourselves right now! In between the laughs, there are moments of fear akin to what early readers of H.G. Wells must've felt while reading of Morlocks and future cannibalism! Wrapped up in a "big-ass" burrito of popular comedy, it's actually a four-alarm wake-up call for the preservation of human intellect! Average everyman Joe and prostitute volunteer Rita awaken from an Army cryogenics experiment (long forgotten following a typically diversionary sex scandal) to find the United States a big, super-sized, dumbed-down elementary school playground version of itself! Where English has devolved into a collection of curses, monosyllabic grunts and catch phrases. All clothing consists of ugly synthetic fibers with advertising logos screaming across them (turning people into walking billboards...wait, this is a FICTIONAL future, right...?). Anyway, Joe (seperated from Rita) is eventually arrested and tried in a court reminiscent of PLANET OF THE APES (even a few POTA music cues thrown in). Soon, he is released on parole when he is discovered to be (in this era) the smartest man alive. President Comancho, a former wrestler/porn star (Jesse Ventura, Arnold Schwarzenegger...close enough!) forces Joe (a.k.a. Not Sure--thanks to an ID processing error) to cure the dying crops(which were being hyper salinated on sports drinks). When his efforts seem to fail, he is sent to Monday Night Rehab (Britney, Mel, Lindsey...take a good look) where he faces off a collection of killer monster trucks (like NASCAR meets RUNNING MAN; reality TV gone to hell, er, wait--it's there already). When the malnourished crops finally begin to sprout, Joe is given a pardon. He and Rita settle down in this horrific (but not at all implausible) future after discovering from their open mouthed lawyer(named Fried Asshole in Spanish!) that a rumored time machine is actually a rusted out, historically grotesque theme park ride (WW2 fought with dinosaurs!). I know this is only a comedy, but this film really should be taken as a cautionary tale(ala Twilight Zone). When the preservation of knowledge, dignity and personal freedom is forsaken for a big-ass, super-sized burrito supreme (and repeated viewings of "OW! MY BALLS!"), it's time to pound your fist into the shoreline and cry like Chuck Heston; "YOU MANIACS! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!" Was the above review useful to you? Making fun of the people who don't get it... 10 August 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I find it funny reading some of the comments here. The people who hated it or don't get it are the people that the movie is making fun of. Obviously it can't have that broad an audience when they are mocking everyone with an IQ under 120 (after all, Joe/Not Sure is 100, and he's generally considered a loser in our times). The reviewers here who find it "raciest" or "self-reflexive" are the ones running the country in 500 years. So why get mad? You win? ;) For me, it was a flashback to sixth grade. Not because of the humor, but because the entire society had devolved into sixth grade, where the stupidest kids are cool and calling everyone a fag for being smart, or countering an argument by going "blah, blah blah" and having everyone laugh, and talking about wrestling and how everyone was going to nail everyone else even though they had no idea what to do. As a smart kid, I lived this, and for me it was vindication and nostalgia at once. It would have been nice if the movie was better overall. It needed something more than what it had. It was more of a drawn out short story than a full feature, but oh well. Luke Wilson does play the perfect average Joe since he is so average. The supporting cast played their morons well. And maybe it's sexist to make the "average" American in 2005 a prostitute, but sadly, it's not that far off if you've been in college within the last 20 years. But Maya Rudolph plays her character well, and she's a fox. Unfortunately Mike Judge really doesn't know what to do with female characters, but I'd still nail her behind the bushes, and I'm totally sure she'd put out... ;) (and for anyone who found that "sexiest" just watch the movie and you might get it. or maybe not.) Was the above review useful to you? Very entertaining, worth your time from PG, Florida 9 August 2007 It is well documented that the number of your offspring bears a strong inverse correlation to your IQ. But its a mistake to overanalyze this, because it is not science fiction, it's comedy. The plot was overwhelmingly simple, and it won't be winning any best screenplay Oscars. But I had a good 10-15 solid belly laughs watching this, which puts it well above most comedies I see. Luke Wilson basically plays... uhh.. Luke Wilson in this one for the 23rd straight movie, which is fine with me. The female protagonist is pretty tacked on, but doesn't detract anything. I thought almost all the minor to bit part characters really knocked it out of the park though. All in all a very enjoyable film, highly recommend! All hail President Camacho! Was the above review useful to you? A social satire that is more wishy-washy than it is satirical from Canada 6 July 2007 Right from the start, I knew I was not going to like Idiocracy that much. Yes, I have watched a lot of Mike Judge's previous work, but the idea behind Idiocracy seemed like nothing but a one-note joke I doubted he could hold for the entirety of the eighty-plus minute runtime. Sadly, I was right, but only to a point. In what could be considered a brilliant military experiment, Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson), a very average American, is selected for a hibernation program in hopes that he will survive and remain intact for a year. Along with the prostitute and again, average, Rita (Maya Rudolph), both are put to sleep. But through a series of events, they are both forgotten about, and stay sleeping for five hundred years. But a lot has changed in those years, and how Joe just may be the smartest man on the planet. Idiocracy should have felt original in its concept. A prophetic prediction for the future, Judge outlines the idea of everyone getting a whole lot dumber, and the acceptance levels for just about everything to go totally out of whack. And while some of the plot devices he uses have already come true (such as shortened words and an abundance of slang), a lot of the things he brings in have already been used in other works. Throughout the entire opening of Joe and Rita's hibernation and waking up in the very far future, I kept thinking of Futurama (and that was not an all too original idea even when that first came out). When the character of Frito (Dax Shepard) is watching the "Ow! My Balls!", I envisioned the likes of The Simpsons, Family Guy and just about anything else in the last ten years where a central joke was a man getting hit by an object inbetween his legs. What should have been fresh material for what could be a brilliant social satire, felt stale and rehashed. If he wanted to make an effective statement about the times, should he not have used some new material? Would that not have been the logical thing to do? Yes, there are a few small touches here and there (one that comes to mind is the love seat that is also a toilet), but they are few and far between the recycled material. What is also a little disheartening is the story in general. It just feels half-baked. I was never the greatest Office Space fan, but it had a story (one that was wildly random nonetheless), and the story was decent enough for the film to go from beginning to end with relative ease. Here, it just seems like that one-note idea was just that, and more than a little bit of padding had to be added to make it feature-length. The first little bit with Joe getting used to everything was alright, but everything that leads out of that specifically, feels weakened because of its obvious making-stuff-up-as-we-go style film-making. It is nowhere near as strong as those original moments, and becomes downright boring in a lot of cases. If it is good for anything, it is to further perpetuate the idea of the film being a dull joke that never got totally off the ground. And of course, the film is littered with plot holes, only further making the original idea continue to become worse and ill planned than it originally intended. Wilson is painfully boring and uninspired in his role. I realize he is supposed to be average, but the dullness and lack of enthusiasm he displays in almost every scene is almost inexcusable. He just does not look like he is even attempting to try with the material, and does not seem to get the joke about him being so average. I realize some may say he plays the average role to perfection, but the zest needed to make his character truly alive and three-dimensional, is entirely missing from every scene he graces. I just wish he was nearly as good in movies like these as he is in Wes Anderson flicks (and even that broadly dull comedy is a whole lot funnier than this social satire). Rudolph and Shepard seem to be playing their roles very well, but suffer from never taking the role past its limits. Never did I truly believe Shepard was as dim-witted and moronic as his character sets out to be. He looked the part, but really did not act like it at all. Rudolph looked truly confused most of the time, but again, I think this is more of an issue of not quite getting the jokes being brought up throughout the film. Small turns from recognizable cast members will either make you giggle, and leave you with a rotten feeling in your stomach. They all look and sound like they are just reading from the pages of Judge's screenplay, and not doing much at all with the words. For its many issues, Idiocracy is watchable. When the satire is turned on and is working, it feels incredibly realistic and slightly frightening in what it is suggesting. But when it is off, and is merely attempting to make statements, it falls flat on its face. Judge knows what he is doing here, and I am disappointed to say, but he just does not seem to know what statements he wants to make, and whether or not he should even bother making them in the first place. It is very wishy-washy in what it wants to accomplish, and the film suffers as a result of that. But hey, for a movie about idiots and averages, should I really have expected something truly worthwhile and predictive of the future? 6/10. from England 2 July 2007 Really not sure what there is to not like about this one. It's a cheerful, uplifting, thought provoking and humorous film. Certainly not one that'll have you in stitches or rolling on the floor, but then I don't think it ever pretended to be that or set itself up in that way. Whilst the idea was executed in an amusing plot, I'm sure there was a tinge of seriousness from the writers & those concerned, and used the extremities in here to evoke a message of how dumbed down society has become and that we are heading in exactly the direction of this film, just nowhere near to the extent it makes out. There was a wealth of plot available with a premise such as in Idiocracy so it was easy to be left with the opinion that the substance was a little light. There were parts of the plot and some of the characters that gave the impression of the film still being in a draft stage rather than a finished version, but all in all still a very good effort, I'd recommend it to anyone. There isn't anything to not like about it, so I fail to see how people can get that worked up about it. The rating is at least 1/10 beneath where it should be. Was the above review useful to you? Simple fun with a thought-provoking concept Author: T P 25 April 2007 Especially the first 15 or so minutes of the movie lay out the concept of the movie very well and make some good points. The majority of the movie is not to be taken serious and the fun in it is not of the witty but more of the dumb kind. Having said that, it is both hilarious as well as interesting to watch - at many instances of poking fun at the dumbing down of society (you could look at this movie as a one-joke movie), I found myself thinking that it made sense as the ultimate result of this progression. There are a few unthoughtful lapses in the movie which are not believable in the context of the future society it presents (i.e. uncharacteristic brightness on their behalf), but overall it delivers on its premise. Was the above review useful to you? Great premise, not executed as well as it should have been from United States 19 April 2007 My husband and I love Mike Judge's work - Beavis & Butthead, Office Space, and King of the Hill. He's just really funny! We were really looking forward to this film, especially when we heard the summary: average guy wakes up 500 years in the future and is the smartest man alive, because our society has become (in proper satirical form) so dumbed down. Well, the movie wasn't as great as we expected, which was disappointing. We're not comedy snobs, believe me, so it wasn't that it was too "lowbrow" or anything. I think that a lot of the jokes just fell flatter than they were supposed to. The beginning was promising, but as the film went on, we got more and more bored. I have to say that the message, though heavy-handed, is a good one, and kind of ironic coming from the guy who brought us Beavis & Butthead. The whole point is to propagate intelligence in our present-day society, so that our future won't be a disaster. So.... I'd recommend that you read a book or go to a museum rather than sit through this movie. It wasn't the worst film I've ever seen, but I definitely wouldn't say it's the best. Was the above review useful to you? Like the "Joe's Garage" liner notes in movie form from Atlanta, GA 29 January 2007 This movie's about an average guy who accidentally gets transplanted 500 years into the future, only to find out that he is now the most intelligent person alive. Essentially, Devo was right. Humans dumbed themselves down to the point where a person who speaks normally is called gay. This movie really reminded me of the liner notes from Frank Zappa's album, "Joe's Garage," and Orwell's 1984 mixed together, except no one was as smart as the Central Scrutinizer or Big Brother, but the society was a complacent one, seeing as everyone was so dumb. This is a very funny movie; don't go into it looking for heavy socio-political ideology; it's just a comedy. A funny time-waster. Apparently, I need more lines of text, so I will say that Luke Wilson did a good job, Maya Rudolph was underused, the president was hilarious. Was the above review useful to you? An uneven satire of current social trends from Tucson, Arizona, United States 14 January 2007 "Idiocracy" is the latest in a long line of stories and movies set in a future society where things have been "dumbed down" and/or the people are stupid. As others have noted, its predecessors include the C. M. Kornbluth story "The Marching Morons" (1951) and the Woody Allen movie "Sleeper," along with "Demolition Man" and the recent TV cartoon series "Futurama." The movie it most resembles, however, in both style and spirit, is probably "Death Race 2000," released in 1975. Like each of these works, "Idiocracy" uses its premise to satirize and comment on trends in present-day society. And to some measure, it succeeds. There are some genuinely funny moments, along with a lot of gross-out humor. Production values are minimal, and if you're looking for a logical, coherent story, this is not the movie for you. Clearly, a society where everyone is as stupid as these people appear to be could not function at all. Who would design and build the giant vehicles used in the Rehabilitation arena, for example? I agree with the consensus rating of 6 to 7 points that IMDb users have given "Idiocracy," although that figure is a bit deceptive., as it represents an average of extremes. People either think this movie is brilliant, or they think it sucks. I disagree with both groups. It's fairly clever in places, but hardly original in concept; see the works cited above. On the other hand, despite rumored "gutting" by Fox, it retains enough sharp-edged humor to qualify as insightful and somewhat daring. Was the above review useful to you? Sleeper for 21st Century from United Kingdom 13 January 2007 While Sleeper may have been Woody Allen idea of what he would have like to happen in the future, this is what he would fear the most. Even surpassing Orwellian fears in its tangibilty. It doesn't take a genius to work out. A very original hypothesis, and when you see it you're going to wonder why no-one else thought of it. Very Funny as well, and well cast throughout. It's a must see. I think this is going to be a real big cult hit, even if the message is really quite unpalatable for many. Particularly as it hits on the chin all if not most big enterprises in or culture. Drawing their influence out into inevitable population selection pressure. Hollywood being the butt. Literally. Was the above review useful to you? Original, creative, and fast paced futuristic comedy delivers from SoFla, UsA 8 January 2007 The ambitiously funny follow up to creator Mike Judge's massively popular Office Space might not take in all the profits that one did, but for people who have developed an appreciation for this writers distinct humor, Idiocracy seems to take this creativity to a whole new level, demonstrating at least the same amount of cult appeal his other work had. While the film is decidedly low-brow and filmed on a relatively small budget, this hilarious science fiction send-up is pretty much spot-on throughout it's fast running time, displaying a sharp eye for satirical commentary on the direction society is headed, in ways a cinematic equivalent to some of the animated show Futurama's cleverest moments. In a future far, far away mankind's breeding preferences have led to a world that has left much to be desired in the cranial capacity. Enter frozen everyman Luke Wilson, who actually makes his shtick work in this character's context as the brilliant human, unearthed after being m.i.a. for hundreds of years. Though the tone could definitely be interpreted as condescending, Mike Judge keeps things running smoothly enough to wipe away any pretensions the script may be hinting at. Only three movies into his career (counting his full-length Beavis and Butthead feature) and Judge continues to assert his unique wit, matched here only by the amount of clever sight gags. Yes the pacing and humor will get a tad repetitive by the final frame, but I couldn't really complain about something being repetitious in and of itself if it was based upon such fresh material as this futuristic farce. This will be an underrated gem for some time, cherished by fans but largely ignored by the majority to whom it talks to. Treat yourself to this distinct and independent dystopian joke, that's not so funny after your done seeing numerous real-world parallels. Was the above review useful to you? God you feel superior but................ 1 January 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I just watched the film and it made me feel good but sad. It made me feel good that my views on redneck, trash , commercial, America which is forcing it's values on the English speaking world are superbly parodied here. Sad cos it may come true. Some sort of spoilers: This is a very political film disguised as Beavis and Butthead hence the thick American admin in the white house (ding dong). It attacks US corporations - Could a corp take over federal institutions? could gator aid replace water? It attacks both the trailer trash and the yuppies. and that is why it is being under promoted. It is also why it probably appeals more to Euros than Americans. The jokes are too close to home for an American audience to like it. I found it both hilarious and disturbing. Thank goodness my children read books. Was the above review useful to you? A side note on the genesis of the story from Boston, MA 1 January 2007 Note although not credited, Judge obviously got at least a little inspiration from sci-fi short story The Marching Morons by Cyril Kornbluth see the link below. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Marching_Morons I can't remember if they ever used the story in the Twilight Zone TV series but it does seem a likely candidate. It would be nice to see an anthology type of sci-fi movie made from some of the great 50's Sci-Fi stories. Say 3-4 short films of 20-40 minutes each rather than stretching one story into a 100 min. film. The Twilight Zone movie is an example but they just used old episodes and it became more famous for the death of Vic Morrow than the actual film. Was the above review useful to you? I expected more from Romania 30 December 2006 Mike Judge is a scholar of stupidity. He finds it, refines it, exposes it. He did so in Beavis and Butthead, in Office Space, in Saturday Night Live... He does so in this movie. However, he does it with almost no style. It's not like I didn't enjoy the movie, but it was so extreme in its stupidity, that it did not connect. The only true valuable lesson is the beginning, where it shows how a bright high IQ couple postpones making children, waiting for the right time, and miss their opportunity, while a family of hillbillies grows exponentially in time. That didn't make me wish to have children, though... What I think bothered me most is that the movie does reflect reality. The increasing dumbing down of the human race can only lead to disaster. But the state of the world in the 26th century, according to the movie, was just comical. It wasn't realistic enough to make anything but a smart-ass farting movie. On the other hand, maybe it wasn't meant to connect with me, but with the hillbillies that will eventually watch the movie and maybe think more and breed less. Alas, it is unlikely to work... Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Good Basis For A Plot, But As Dumb As Its "De-evolved" Society from United States 3 April 2015 While the basis of this movie was comedic, entertaining, and somewhat true, in the end it was about as stupid as its "de-evolved" people. Luke Wilson, Maya Rudolph, and even Terry Crews just did not bring the laughs. Dax Shepard did on the other hand and was probably the best part about the movie playing his idiotic character wonderfully. The graphics were corny, fake and cheap along with much of the script and story (Yes I understand some of that was intentional). The idea behind the movie was great but not very well executed. Misanthropes like myself will enjoy the societal satire, but for me that did not outweigh the fact that this was dumb and simply not that funny. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Best extrapolating documentary Author: hyphenpointhyphen 30 August 2014 Like the documentaries Waterworld, Dr Strangelove, or Mad Max, this visionary piece of art is a great example of directors with a gut feeling for the realism and plausible development of the human species. It certainly lacks proof of concept but will be seen as a true classic in many centuries. The simplistic depiction will make this one of the masterpieces for future film students who want to major in science fiction movies with a blunt and naive way to approach the viewer. Although my intellectual expectations weren't very high, I was thoroughly baffled by the eloquent scripting which was stringent from start to finish. I feel grateful to say that I more than happy to bow before this kind of creativity and wit. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase, "Surrounded by Idiots." from Orlando, Florida 17 February 2014 Did you ever get the sinking sensation that you're surrounded by idiots? Tell it to Luke Wilson when he gets sent to the future. A pretty idiotic future. I feel so sorry for him being in this idiotic world. It is is funny and thrilling. It is also chilling, because there is no intelligent life at all! Hence, my pity for the protagonist! Now you know how Edward Platypus from "Camp Lazlo" feels. Friends of mine told me to watch and after watching it, I loved it! Put that DVD to your collection. If all those stories and movies that took place in the future lived in a community. "Metropolis" would be King, "Brave New World" would be Queen, "Soylent Green" would be the Royal Cook, "Planet of the Apes" would be the Royal Groundskeeper, H.G. Well's "Things to Come" would be the Alchemist and "Idiocracy" would be the Court Jester. Most science fiction stories and films predict the future. This one did. It is also a statement picture. It is saying that due to a bombardment of political correctness and how our world is turning upside-down due to the forces of unfairness. Give it a watch because I highly recommend it. Rated R for language and sexual references. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Outrageous but prescient? from United States 1 September 2013 This is played for laughs, but the idea that people are getting dumber is actually highly plausible. Studies have shown (or so I've been told) that domestic animals are not as bright as the wild kind. And guess what? We domesticate ourselves, or rather our culture does. Recently there was a story in the news about a study that showed that the brains of obese people are 16 years older than the brains of people of normal weight (these were people in their seventies). Furthermore the brains of the obese had about eight percent less mass than the brains of people of normal weight. Merely "fat" people had half the deficiency. So when director Mike Judge depicts all those fat and dumb people in the future, he may be on to some serious prognosticating. As for the film itself, well, it is strangely compelling. This future world of idiots with everything falling apart seems almost real. It should be emphasized that all science fiction about the future is of necessity an extrapolation from the present. In fact, the real power of futuristic tales is what they tell us about the present. Idiocracy is no exception. The dumbed-down, couch-potato, dimly-aware creatures shown in the film are us! (Present company excepted of course.) Unfortunately Idiocracy is a sort of one trick pony. The central joke wears a little thin toward the middle of the film and the concocted story collapses into the merely silly. There are some good laughs along the way, such as crop failures due to using a kind of Gatorade on the crops called Brawndo instead of water. —Dennis Littrell, author of "The World Is Not as We Think It Is" Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: What is the Secret of Brawndo Green? 25 July 2013 *** This review may contain spoilers *** A pair of slow-witted US citizens is duped into participating in a Futurama-style experiment wherein they are preserved in suspended animation for resurrection in the distant future. Far from finding an advanced culture, they awaken in a sort of Planet of the Apes to discover they are far more intelligent than the population of entertainment-crazed morons surrounding them, including the omnipotent government officials, doing the bidding of a variant of the Soylent Corp. with its prized green nutritional product and pseudo-scientific consensus. Everyone is "out of the shadows" with his universal bar-code tattoo necessary for all services. The protagonists' superior residual knowledge and recollection of discarded common practices enable them to save civilization and dominate it by reinventing the wheel, an inverted version of A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court. Credit is deserved for prescience: What was presumably conceived as a satirical far-fetched premise has metamorphosed into something of a documentary just a few years after its release. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: The actual future of the world from Hell 19 May 2013 It's hard to go wrong with director and writer Mike Judge, the creator of Beavis and Butt-Head (1993-1997, 2011) and Office Space (1999). Mike Judge is at its best when he exposes the idiocy of people. Beavis and Butt-Head are an excellent example of that. Idiocracy basically inverts the universe of Beavis and Butt-Head. Instead of two idiotic characters in a world where everybody in general is just average, Idiocracy is about about two average characters in a world where everybody is idiotic. The result is a move that is better suited for people before the pre-1990s because today we are basically living in a world that is quite close to what the movie portrays. It is for that reason that the move has achieved a good cult following among those who are against the New World Order conspiracy. It's definitely not for those who are into movies or TV shows like Keeping Up with the Kardashians (2007–2013) or Jersey Shore (2009–2012). If you are into such movies or TV shows, I wouldn't recommend Idiocracy to you as it will definitely insult you. As with What Dreams May Come (1998) I didn't feel as if Idiocracy was complete. It felt too short and I had expected more. The movie felt almost like a long commercial. The main protagonist of the movie, Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson), while interesting, is just too average. That's literally the point of the movie, but it doesn't really work to take full advantage of the dystopia. Before his introduction, the movie starts out well but sets the stage too high. It's the same problem with What Dreams May Come. With great material to work with, these two movies take the quick and dirty approach and leave - at least in my case - a little bit too much to be desired. I would have preferred if the movie would have been about 2:30 hours instead of a little less than 1:30 hour. As always, Mike Judge is very careful when it comes to politics, which is unfortunate because as with Beavis & Butt-Head, whenever he does touch on politics, it's good. With a movie like Idiocracy that's in particular important to get right. It's standard practice in Hollywood to trash Christianity and praise promiscuity, drugs, paraphilia, etc. Mike Judge's works naturally demand the opposite and Mike Judge delivers too little on this front, despite all the opportunities (especially in case of Idiocracy) that he gets. Mike Judge apparently thinks that the movie speaks for itself in this regard and it does those who understand what's going on but it's more important to reach those who don't. If you are one of those people who is a fan of 16 and Pregnant (2009–2012) and you watch this movie, then you deserve the same treatment as people who like Idiocracy get while watching a movie like Paul (2011). Hollywood has zero tolerance for people who refuse to go along with promiscuity, the dumbing down of society, etc. So it's only fair if a movie like Idiocracy would the opposite of a standard Hollywood movie in all aspects, not just a few. That's almost as bad as with South Park (1997-2013), which proudly sees itself as daring enough to make fun of everyone but they never dare to make fun of, for example, Islam or Muslims (instead, they resort to constantly attacking Judaism and Jews, for example). I would have liked Idiocracy to be more blatant, way more blatant. For example, in the description of the movie it says that Joe Bauers "wakes 500 years in the future. He discovers a society so incredibly dumbed-down that he's easily the most intelligent person alive." Great, but openly say what the exact reasons are for the reduction in intelligence. Just saying that smart people have less children is not good enough (statistically, Westerners in general are having less and less children). Obsession with sex (promiscuity and perversity in particular), drugs, PC, GM foods, etc, that's what causing a reduction in intelligence. Being dumb is literally celebrated in today's world (Jackass (2000–2002), Keeping Up with the Kardashians (2007–2013), etc). Those are the things that are dumbing down society. That's what I want to see in Idiocracy, the truth right in your face without any sugarcoating. Nonetheless, as with Mike Judge's previous (best) works, the message of the movie is priceless and the movie is more than enough entertaining to keep you interested. I would definitely recommend it. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Great laughs from United States 12 December 2012 The only people who didn't laugh while watching this movie were probably in pain from trying to sit still with a corn cob stuck in their ***. "Lighten up, Francis." And yes, I fear this is where we are headed. My wife and I rolled on the floor almost literally. And also, I still quote this movie many years after having seen it. It's also a great example of lemmings, sheep and cattle to show your kids. I actually came here to write this review because of a facebook post in which someone was complaining that everyone in America seems to be forgetting we were formed as a republic, not a democracy; to protect the people from the majority. I mentioned the movie and then decided to look it up mostly to see what year I'd seen it. When I saw there were actually party poopers giving it a star, I had to chime in. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Completely Hilarious 3 August 2012 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Too funny! Maya Rudolph and Luke Wilson definitely have chemistry. This film seems like a depiction of what actually will occur in the future. We're already halfway there. People texting while driving, face buried in their Blackberries as they text on Facebook 24/7, mindless nonsense on TV - reality shows like Jersey Shore, Housewives of Atlanta, The Bachelorette, etc....People dress like slobs, eat nothing but fast food, and Politically Correct has extinguished freedom of speech. The part where a machine advertised the "Big-A**** Burrito - too funny. I wish they took it to the drive-thru..."What the **** you want?" "I want a moth********* Big Mac and a iced tea". And President Camacho...sheer genius - a wrestling star is President....This show was a laugh riot. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Absolubtely hilarious and is easy to relate to! from United Kingdom 28 November 2011 Luke Wilson is amazing in this film! I found this film really funny as it can actually be related to. People say that in the future we are going to be really smart and have hover crafts etc but we are just getting dumber by the second! There are tons of one liners in this film that cracked me up so much, there are also some very recognisable actors in this film. This film is completely warped and will make you laugh your head off (literally). If we are this dumb in the future then I'd just love to see what it's like, also the show in it, "OW, MY BALLS!" looks absolutely hysterical. The story line of the film is funny too as it is set in the future where people are so stupid that they're giving their plants Gatorade and rehab consists of running away from monster trucks in a little car. Also at the end there is an awesome and hilarious twist! It has lots of sarcasm humour, slapstick humour and silly/ stupid humour therefore it's fit for all audiences with all different types of humour. If you've seen Superbad, Dumb and Dumber, Wedding Crashers and the hit series "Everybody Hates Chris" and liked them then you will love this. Every person should watch this film at least once in their life! This film could not have been made any funnier, I was in tears of laughter, definitely worth a watch so if your thinking about getting it then get it now!!! Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Has Some Good Moments, but Not "Office Space" Good 7 November 2011 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I'll preface this by stating that Mike Judge's "Office Space" in one of my favorite comedies. Had heard "Idiocracy" wasn't bad, but I was still pretty disappointed with the movie on the whole. Too many of the jokes were too silly, fizzled, or really not funny. However some of the visual jokes of the future were creative and decent. (spoilers)Was amused by the Capital Mall turning into a speed-boat lake, Fudd-Ruckers into ya know, Starbuck, and Costco. Enjoyed some knit-wit dialog, but the dumbing-down wasn't acted uniformly and came off flat a lot of the time. In short "Idiocracy" was too idiotic for me. It had an OK premise for some of the gags, but wasn't put together or acted well enough. Had higher expectations. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Dumbification from The Society NY 14 August 2011 The US Army put Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson)its most average GI and a street prostitute Rita (Maya Rudolph) into an hibernation experiment. After a year the project was forgotten but the subjects remained in a state of animation for 500 years. While they've been sleeping, the human race devolved. Intelligent people stopped reproducing while the unwashed masses, aided by advances in medical science, flowered out of control. The result is survival of the unfit-est. How will decidedly average Rita and Joe survive an epoch in which they're the smartest people alive? As depicted in this movie, the world of the future is an hilarious blend of lower caste cultures: people talk in an incomprehensible babble; the President, President Camacho, (Terry Crews) was picked because he was the Smack Down Champion; rehabilitation is running the gauntlet in Monster Truck Jam; they're watering the crops with Gatorade ... Meanwhile the infrastructure is collapsing and the crops are failing. Can average Joe put them on the right track? It's an excellent social commentary ably made by the fine acting of Terry Crews, Luke Wilson and Maya Randolph. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: A vulgar delight 16 July 2011 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Idiocracy can certainly be called 'visionary' in a vulgar sort of way, whilst its humour is definitely base, it's ironically so. Not the sort of film you would take your maiden aunt so see. That apart I was torn between laughing my B*t off ( in joke ?) & feeling sad that we are well on the way to the future world shown in the film. The America of 2500 is depicted as being mostly White, and clearly that won't be the case given present demographics and White birth rate. This is in complete contrast to the recent remake of the 'Time Machine' with which this film shares the core storyline,in a perverse sort of way. Luke Wilson plays the part of Joe Bauers in an understated quiet way that's designed to contrast sharply with the brash, vulgar hapless world he's been ejected into. Jim Carrey ( as funny as he is ) would NOT have suited this role. Comedy is a powerful weapon, and this film openly mocks the crass, lowest common denominator, money loving, consumerist , fast food, dumbed down, sensationalist, sex obsessed 'Western ? ' society at every opportunity. It's no wonder it made it to Cinemas without much hype, I feel they only realised how mockingly it portrays, and projects modern day 'culture' too late in the day, and only sought to recover their financial outlay. So many poignant yet funny scenes its hard to pick a favourite. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: A Poignant Piece of Social Commentary Author: imdb-ary 30 June 2011 Living in the modern world of our American Corporatocracy, very few controversial directors take the necessary stance of filming such a socio-political view for a wide audience. Mike Judge breaks the stagnant mold of pop culture and the homo-erotic bias of Hollywood to direct this amazing feature... with magnificent results. Even the research gone into the psychology of his characters speak volumes. The way it explores the many subtle nuisances of consumerism present even in our modern culture is beyond compare. The viewer take note: this film ventures into the darkness of mankind and the very heart of Corporate America, and does not hold back to what is regarded as a believable and an adroit masterpiece. Mike Judge's awe inspiring direction makes Stanley Kubrick look like Uwe Boll. When I finished this film, I couldn't speak for three weeks. The first thing I said when my voice finally recovered from an overload of beauty and majesty was, "Oh, sweet, glorious enlightenment of my soul." See this film. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Great ideas, lacking in execution from United Kingdom 25 April 2011 This is a very timely comedy considering the dumbed down nature of western humanity. A general gripe would be that it would not take 500 years to get to this world, we are virtually there now. Case in point: this 2006 film predicts a movie called Ass would win best screenplay at the Oscars, the same year the abysmal Little Miss Sunshine wins that category at the Oscars. Although this has many genuinely funny moments (rare in modern films) it is lacking in some departments. The production values are not high and a lot of the sets look cheap. The voice over seems a rather weak device too. And the story does develop in a rather conventional and altogether predictable way. Still so many of the concepts are hilarious and frighteningly close to realisation. I particularly liked the president having to read the word "shit" off an Autocue (a sly dig at Obama no doubt) and the chair cum toilet, but many other ideas are delightful. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: This is a great Movie from Guerneville, CA 30 August 2010 The rating the critics gave this movie is wrong, this is a much better movie that the star rating implies. While I can understand why some people "won't get it" (and the movie will explain why there might be lots of these people), Some people are going to love it (and at this point in time there should still be lots of these people). It is very important to watch the movie from the start. If you miss the beginning you will not be able to fully appreciate what is going on. I expect the people who gave the review missed the start. This movie incorporates many aspects of today's culture in an alternate view of the future, and while it's creators took the scenario to the extreme, the movie actually makes a relevant comment on the future. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: It's been four years, why haven't I heard of this movie? from Australia 21 August 2010 It's late and I am about to go to bed when I notice 'Idiocracy' show up on the TV. Just while I'm figuring out that it's Luke Wilson and parsing the plot, it's already moving quickly and has caught my attention. First thing that came to mind was: Dystopia. Now a number of movies and TV programs featuring dystopic futures ran though my mind while watching this show. Several have already been mentioned in other IMDb reviews, but I'll include them for completeness: Futurama, Back to the Future, Buck Rogers, Escape from New York, Wall-E, RoboCop, I Robot, even Blade Runner, Brazil, 12 Monkeys, Rollerball, Westworld. Wait- don't get me wrong- this movie is nowhere near as good as those, but one what it is is funny. In a Mike-Judge-silly way of course, so you have to appreciate his style. If you take away the comedy, this movie portrays a frightening and possibly real future of the USA (other countries aren't really mentioned). It's the natural progression of people who like Ricki Lake, Monster Truck Madness, Judge Judy, Pro Wrestling. People who think book readin' and learnin' is gay and that the "Prezident" should fire off a few rounds of a submachine gun to quiet the cabinet. It's no great sci-fi or social commentary like Gattaca or Soylent Green. But it is highly amusing. Even with some low-budget special effects it still manages to capture something that films like The Fifth Element miss; if we don't remain vigilant we shall all wind up as trailer trash. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Ironically accurate! (or accurately ironic? shall we call it "irony" or "social analysis?) from Argentina 16 July 2010 Humor is plain silly, let's be honest. But it is indeed a raw depiction of our society. Globalization, internet and multimedia should have brought us access to literature and science from all over the world and allow true freedom of speech. Instead, you see that the most searched words are "paris hilton", "pamela anderson" and "britney spears". That not to mention that the website www.sex.com was sold for a few million dollars. All these tiny things show us the way society is evolving. Instead of becoming smarter, and instead of the fact that multimedia should make general knowledge cheaper and easier for everyone (which did not happen), we find multimedia to be providers of utter crap and no food for thought. So, when you see a movie such as this one, where people is plain stupid you ask yourself: Is mike judge a comedian or a visionary? Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Good in theory from Canada 24 March 2010 Honestly, this movie was OK. In theory, conceptually, it was was decent. I found myself referring to it in conversation many times after I watched it, years later, so it is indeed relevant, though perhaps not as well executed as it could have been. I probably would have liked it a bit better if I was younger (13-18), so it is definitely a movie that is geared towards young audiences, despite the R rating. However, near the end, I felt it dragged on a bit, so maybe don't watch it with friends. If you're feeling stupid, or just want to feel better about your own IQ, watch Idiocracy, but make sure nobody ever finds out that you did. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Very creative film that deserved a bigger budget and should not have been underrated from United States 16 February 2010 This may seem like a dumb movie with toilet humor at first but there is a deep message in it. It does have it's funny moments though, and the jokes are mostly about how there is so many stupid people in the future and rely on those stupid people clashing with normal people for jokes, but like I said it has it's moments. The concept of a average Joe being the smartest person in the world in the year 2500 AD was pretty intriguing, especially the picking at of idiocy. You will laugh at the comedic value, but will also realize that some aspects of the film just might become a reality. This is a underrated film that deserved better. I for one thoroughly enjoyed it. 7.9/10 23 January 2010 This is by far my favorite of the Mike Judge film trilogy. Due to the survival and continued reproduction of the stupid the future looks bleak as it is run by idiots and only one man can save the future. An highly average man and a streetwalker had been frozen and left to wake up in the future which is not doing so well. Unfortunately sounding smart in a future where pro wrestling is at the height of intellectual thought makes him look fairly bad in the public eye. Our hero must try to survive as well as work on trying to save mankind from itself. This movie is as written above my favorite of the mike judge movies. This movie works hard to leave you laughing out loud at the antics of the future people. I really think that the level of thought going into this makes it a fairly original piece and the comedy doesn't just dwell on the main character's misfortune (though there is still quite a bit of that here). I miss the just full out comedies and believe that this film is very much worth a watch. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Joe (average military) engages in a hibernation experiment that hurdles him 500 yrs and 100 I.Q. above the rest. from United States 1 February 2009 This is by far one of my favorite films (top 5) ever. I am surprised to admit this film is even better than Office Space (if the true followers can believe that). I have to write this review because this movie is (like office space) under rated and not advertised enough. I find myself laughing out loud just thinking about some of the lines from the film - out of the blue. It is the kind of movie that gets better each time you watch it (twice in a row one day). So much going on in the background. Their is this one scene were Joe freaks out because he sees the date (2505). He takes a look out the window and buildings are tied together, cars are piling up from a bridge that is out. But if you look real close, a cop car drives right past the pile up with a fresh car to boot and does NOTHING. It is the kind of stupid funny that some people might cringe at, but it is far from a mindless shallow movie as I think it points out what we are doing to ourselves as a civilization in a satirical way. I can think of at least 20 one liners that are probably a lot funnier if you see it actually happening. One cute little scene is when he goes to "St. Gods Memorial Hospital" (seeing is important because misspellings and hospital didn't fit so they started writing it crooked on the building like a kid that ran out of room on the line he was writing on and shrunk and twisted it). In the hospital (background) their is this guy playing a slot machine to win free medical care. Then you see this robotic floor cleaner that keeps bumping up against the wall saying "your floor is now clean", and that little strip is clean, but the rest of the floor is trashed. Just the look on the receptionist face as she is obviously bored and annoyed, completely in her own world the whole time Joe is talking to her. You can see she has a key pad in front of her with pictures of the reason for the visit ( baby born, broken bone, bullet wound). Its great, the receptionist could care less about Joe, but the automated system is so polite. Actually she doesn't even talk to Joe just the computer. And their is this guy in the hospital that is clearly there because he is stuck in his own shirt (background again). It actually took longer to talk about it all than just to see it happen. Its not forced like one joke to the next, its more like another world that parallels ours and highlights everything ridiculous. Much like Office space left us all wanting that swingline stapler, this movie will leave you wanting BRONDO "the thirst mutilator...with electrolytes. I could talk about this movie all day long, but it would be best if you just watch it. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Good Intelligent Movie About the Dumbing Down of America from Albany, NY 31 December 2008 Like Beavis and Butthead, this movie mocks the people it aims at with the kind of slapstick, lowbrow humor it ridicules. I have to give Mike Judge kudos for daring to mock and insult his audience then making them love it. As you read from others, this movie got dumped, doomed for oblivion, with 0 publicity and marketing budget compared to over hyped dreck like "88 Minutes" or "Step Brothers"/ There is nothing new about the observation that the stupid, both intellectually and morally, are out breeding the smart. And with free universal health care coming, this trend can only increase. And after eight years of Bush and the alleged, cool rational geniuses of the right like Laura Ingraham and Rush Limbaugh cheering every dumb ass, fascist hypocritical move Bushco made, it seems like good fortune telling. (For you cons, don't get me wrong. Pop culture, especially rap and MTV is pushing us there too at full sail, which this movie mocks like his Beavis and Butthead did.) The future is funny and depressing at the same time. A wasteland of wrecked infrastructure and cheesy fast food outlets and (Democratic free health care) hospitals run by the tail end of the bell curve denizens. Being a man from the past, Joe Bauers, Mister Average IQ of 100 unambitious military lifer, is now the smartest man alive in the future after a top secret military experiment goes wrong. He is persecuted, maligned then becomes the top dog in USA of 2505, after he figures out the crops are failing cause they are being watered with Gatorade, not plain old water. Okay, the plot and action are not terribly complicated but the satire and futuristic behavior of a nation of Beavis and Butthead couch potatoes puts it leagues ahead of the average comedy, like Zohan. Borrow or rent it, you will laugh no matter if you are 2 S.D.s behind or ahead on the bell curve. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Mike Judge's prophecy of the future not so far-fetched! from Canada 23 September 2008 I really appreciated what this movie was trying to do. Those who didn't like this movie simply don't understand Mike Judge's humor, and that's fine. You're not dumb for not getting it. I didn't like Beavis & Butthead at first either. But with Mike Judge, there's always something else going on, and you have to realize the social commentary he tries to make before you take his stuff at face value. This movie was dead-on accurate in the way it prophesized the state of western culture. It was also completely relatable to me, because I realized that I actually knew a number of people as dumb as those in this movie. This is where we are headed. Don't believe me? Check out your local TV station's prime time lineup. If there are fewer than 3 reality shows on at any given time, I'll gladly take back my comments. At the same time, I think Judge relies a little bit on that stupidity to gain an audience. The dumb fans of Beavis & Butthead probably overlooked the irony and fact that they were staring into a mirror. Idiocracy, on the other hand, was a bit harder to enjoy than B&B without recognizing that irony. Basically, if you have contempt for mankind, you'll probably dig this flick. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Nice comedy about advertise and dumbs :). 28 July 2008 Nice comedy about advertise and dumbs :). I like advertise very much, it's my job. And in this comedy going advertise on max level :), I will not write spoiler, but watch this Idiocracy movie, and you will see... This is the must movie for every mans in advertise "factory". Watch and see the future :). Film Is nice, it isn't top, but it's still good, and i may guarantee you nice smile on your face :). Darwin theory going down. Watch this movie about our next evolution :). If is your IQ >100 go out and take some nice chick to make as much kids as is possible. Save earth! Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: nice and easy watching movie from United Kingdom 23 July 2008 Nice and easy watching movie. I initially thought: "oh my god this is really going to be a film for Idiots!" but as the film goes on it starts showing the message behind which I find quite scaring. If we do not start turning back and read more we will all end up like that sitting on the toilet, watching nonsense television and feeding ourselves just with energy drinks (by the way, i would have loved to be the smartest person in the world as the main character). Definitely worth watching on video; not sure if i would pay the price to the cinema. i am going to research other films by this director to have a better idea about other works he has done Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Will the 26th century be the age of the dumb asses? from Netherlands 22 July 2008 This movie expresses the hot topic over the past few years: are we entertaining ourselves to stupidity? According to the movie the future could be all about ass, "latte" and a general trend of 'uuh'. This movie is by no means the best movie I have ever seen, however, this future vision does scare me somewhat. Could a version of this bleak prediction be a possibility? Excepting for the main characters, and the president, all the future characters sort of blend together, creating one similar attitude and utterings for all. This could have been the intention of the makers, to show that everyone ends up having the same lowbrow interests, watch the same shows and have no more creativity and innovation. I certainly hope this trend will not dominate in the future, I should prefer to imagine a more star trek future myself, where money is a non-issue and exploration and achieving harmony are the goals. But I digress..this movie has its entertaining qualities and serves as an instigator to ponder if this could be possible and what you can do about it. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Scary comedy, realistic Sci-Fi from Romania 18 May 2008 Definitely, Mike Judge has a voice of his own, and he's not afraid to use it! After 'Office Space' (one of my favorites), he took things to the next level and delivered here an even crueler satire of our Western-type, "civilized" society. Obviously, in a dystopia you're not supposed to be fully consistent in every detail, and this movie is not so, but the power of its central idea surpasses any minor flaws in its concept, realization, pace or characters. No wonder that 'Idiocracy' was in fact sabotaged through bad marketing, as it aims to some of the basic characteristics of nowadays consumerism/corporatism and of any hypocrite system. 'Planeta M' (Planet Of The Mediocre) by Ioan Grosan, a great satire with a similar premise, published as monthly episodes in the late 80's in Romania, has been interrupted by communist censorship for similar reasons. You laugh hard many times while watching 'Idiocracy', but you also get a strange inner feeling that some of the things around us could actually become more or less as described in the movie. The huge garbage avalanche is utterly hilarious in its monstrosity, though it's one of the most innocent jokes when compared to the roots of other apparently funny situations in the movie. A great film, and a must see for any human having at least a trace of self-respect. Try not to hunt after any real or imaginary flaws of this movie, but think of it as a 'Time Machine'-warning by a contemporary and wittier H. G. Wells. Well done, Mr. Judge! Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Mike Judge is one of the greatest living filmmakers Author: DeLux 7 April 2008 Why didn't this film get a huge release? This film is brilliant. With this film and Office Space, Mike Judge has proved himself to be one of the most insightful and talented writer-directors currently working. Both of these films are classics. People are talking stupider every year, corporate sponsorship invades society more and more every year, and dumb people do reproduce more than smart people. I loved this movie. A great satire and great entertainment. The film had me cracking up but also shaking my head at how right his observations are about where our society is heading. Judge is the greatest. He should make more films. Office Space is a huge cult classic worldwide and this film will be too. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Broad satire with easy hits on big targets but still enjoyable and funny from United Kingdom 29 March 2008 Private Joe Bauers is average in every regard and has little military ambition apart from staying out of trouble. When he is found to be remarkably average he is selected to be the male subject for the Human Hibernation Project. No military female subject can be found so prostitute Rita is signed up via an agreement with her pimp. The pair are frozen for a year but in this time things don't go so well and the project is forgotten. A freak of nature awakens Joe some time later and he finds to his horror that they have hibernated for 500 years. Not only that but in that period mankind, free from predators and disaster had lost the "survival if the fittest" part of evolution and had simply changed to reflect whatever groups reproduced the most, and the results have not been good with man now reduced to, basically, idiots. Having watched this film now I cannot work out why Fox couldn't work out how to market this film for what it is because it seems pretty clear to me how it could have been done. I suspect that the truth is that they didn't want a film that mocked people who watch low brow stuff and embrace the puerile and crude – not because they were worried of causing offence but just because they wanted a silly comedy that would make as much money as possible. Whatever their reason, their failure is why we in the UK are finding this film washing up on our shores like so much flotsam (or is it jetsam, I forget) with no marketing and no profile whatsoever. It is a shame because, while not as sharp or insightful as I wanted, it is quite an amusing and entertainingly broad dig at the low-brow culture. Judge has picked his targets well and integrates much of our current culture into his depressing future. Anyone using big words is labelled a "f*g", courts are run like Judge Judy and the death sentence has been replaced by WWE crossed with Robot Wars played out in front of a crowd whooping and hollering along to the pantomime in front of them. The targets are easy and the film doesn't use a razor to cut them so much as kick them in the nuts – satire it may be but it is a very broad type. This is not to say that it isn't enjoyable because it is and I did like it as an anti-sci-fi, and its logic totally works when you ask yourself what about our wider culture makes you think that the future will be shiny and white? The narrative is quite clever and allows for a simple frame to present all these ideas within. It is not consistently laugh-out-loud funny but it does enough to amuse throughout. The other Wilson brother does well in the lead, not the most captivating of leading men perhaps but he fits the bill here. Rudolph doesn't have much asked of her but is OK in support. Shepard is the main "future Luddite" and he does this well enough but generally his material is shared across everyone in the rest of the cast. The joke does occasionally wear a bit thin but the short running time and flowing plot prevents weak moments from dipping that much. Overall then a broad but enjoyable satire on modern culture that makes easy but mostly funny digs at it by taking it to the nth degree. Not brilliant by any means but certainly better than the shabby treatment by Fox would suggest. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Low Budget look at our Low-Brow Future from Ontario, Canada 30 December 2007 Do you know what Dysgenics is? If not, scoot off to Google, and find out. This is a very important thing to know before watching Idiocracy. Idiocracy's foundation is basically that we are, as a whole, getting dumber, NOT smarter. It has a lot to say about American society, and a lot of it really isn't all that flattering. And the worst part of it, for me at least, is that now that I've seen Idiocracy - I become convinced almost every day, that this future is right around the corner, not 500 years away! It's not a perfect movie, but it does have a number of really good laughs in it. And I must say, it's gotten better for me with each watching! While it's not a big-budget classic, this will be a movie you think about a lot once you've seen it. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: My "sorry ass" comments (brought to you by Carl's Jr.) from Losa Angelosa 22 December 2007 Disclaimer: We do not guarantee that you would like our "sorry ass" comments, because my brain may or may not have all the electrolytes. Having said that, I like satire and smart comedies. And this movie is a smart movie. The premise is not original ("The Marching Morons", the original story with very similar theme was written was back in the 1950s), but the execution is fresh and interesting. Also it sure takes a lot of guts to make a movie that most may fail to appreciate. Just the other day, I was explaining the movie to an intelligent colleague of mine, and his comments were, "So you had enough free time to sit through this movie, you mean?". Maybe I am just another moron, but that does not mean that this movie is moronic. It is a smart black comedy. What is its basic premise? That, due to the selective nature of the smart people, after a while smart people will cease to exist, and the world will be filled with morons. Sounds outlandish? If you look at most families, the sibling with the best income and comforts of life has the least number of offspring, and the one who is the worst of the lot has the maximum. This is not a 100% rule, but it works pretty much that way, and it works across the continents. What about the world being filled with morons? Actually, in my life, I already see it happening (and I'm sure, may of you do as well). Many people with high degree and successful career, never reads a book, have no clue about anything (except maybe about the evil trio of Paris-Lindsay-Britney, bought to you NOT by Carl's Jr. but by TMZ), do not give two hoots about what is going on in the world and are very happy with their life. And I see it constantly going in a downward spiral. I grew up in a poor country, and I can see that before the advent of TV (like some malignancy spreading to every sphere of our life), we used to read and learn things, but now all we know is what the TV shows us (things such as, brought to you by Carl's Jr.). and anyone hooked to TV has no "second opportunity on earth", because what TV generally projects is blatant consumerism and commercialization of anything and everything. Interestingly, the central satirical theme of the movie is that, and that is why it appears so fresh to people like me, who are otherwise used to usual Hollywood (and others) crap. Where the movie fails is, in my opinion, in the last 20 minutes or so. This part is abrupt, and kind of not carefully scripted or executed. If you like a smart movie, I think you will like this (and also probably Clerks II). II. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: A real horror from Netherlands 26 June 2007 Yes, I know that this movie is meant as a comedy. And the humor is over the top. But the theme about people getting less intelligent in future time might not be so far fetched. I cannot say that it will happen,but if we don't take proper care of our educational system than this could be a possibility. I have noticed that some schools aren't teaching facts anymore. (Like history,geography,basic stuff). The focus is more on learning practical abilities. The theory behind most subjects may be boring but is essential in understanding how things work. In the movie there is this ridiculous example of people growing crops with Gatorade in stead of water! Well,we can laugh about it. But if you never been taught that water contains minerals necessary for plants to grow so how would you know. To me this is a scary notion. So now you understand why this subject isn't funny anymore. It could be that Mike Judge is making fun but at the same time is warning people for a real disaster if education doesn't improve fast. Am I taking this movie too seriously? Yes of course! To each his own fun. I loved Mike Judge's work (Beavis and Butthead and Office space). In these he was able to be critical and funny at the same time. In "Idiocracy" I missed this. Most of the events are too absurd and as I said earlier very scary. I do think if you are in the mood you will like this movie. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Awesoome premise, disappointing execution 4 June 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Joe Bowers (Luke Wilson) and Rita (Maya Rudolph) are subjected to an Army experiment where they sleep for one year. Something goes wrong, and they wake up five hundred years later, in the year 2505. Because of the dumbing down of society and civilization, Joe wakes up to find out he is the smartest man alive. I really had high expectations for this film, because I enjoy Mike Judge's other work ("Office Space", Beavis & Butthead, King of the Hill). This film starts out great, but I felt it was uneven in spots. Some of the jokes were repeated frequently, and I felt like saying, "Yeah, we got the idea, everyone's stupid." I felt the rehabilitation sequence went on a little too long, but besides these negatives, this is a pretty funny film but I can only recommend it Luke warmly. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Good idea, poorly executed. from Iceland 21 May 2007 This movie explores the idea of what if the survival of the fittest gets turned around and instead of the best traits in people don't evolve with them but only the worst. That gives us the outcome that in 500 years people will have become so stupid that they face instinction. The plot of this movie revolves around an average Joe waking up 500 years in the future and finding out that he is the smartest man alive. I like the idea of this movie and I think it could have been great but it had too many flaws. I think the producers could have done a lot better but this film leaves nothing behind. Ecxept maybe a little annoyance towards the stupid people in the movie. I guess this movie is alright for a few laughs but it is exactly as the title claims, a complete no-brainer. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Alright, if you like blatant humour. 28 March 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I saw this film with no preconceptions, as I had never heard of it before. I found it enjoyable, with a few out loud laughs (mostly at the corporate satire), but at times the 'stupid' characters became incredibly grating, almost ruining the movie completely, which was pretty much any time they had more than two consecutive lines. After researching the film post-watching, and finding out it was a Mike Judge film, it all started to make sense. This film is pretty much identical to every other piece of Mike Judges work I have seen. It is pretty much a cross between Beavis and Butthead (the idiots) and King of the Hill (the straight guy). Throw in a hooker and some time travel and you pretty much have this film. If you enjoy Mike Judges work, you will probably enjoy this film, but personally I can't imagine ever having the compulsion to see it again. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Great concept, so so execution 27 March 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I didn't enjoy this film that much, but still the concept of a future where all intelligence has been bred out of the human race is a great social commentary on the current anti-intellectual atmosphere in the United States, where we have a President who people vote for precisely because he DOESN'T appear to be too bright. Not to mention the comment on our ultra consumerist society, where mega-corporations engage in a furious race to the bottom, trying their hardest to satisfy our basest desires when it comes to sex, violence, and fatty foods. Unfortunately, the execution of the great concept (tm) doesn't work so well. I caught myself laughing a few times through the movie, but mostly it's just amazement about how the world portrayed in the movie really isn't that far removed from our current reality. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Waste of time and money from United States 25 March 2007 I'll start by saying that I love Mike Judge and I love Bevis and Butthead and Office Space. I read the summary of the movie before I watched it and it sounded appealing and caught my interest. I really wanted to like this movie. Mike Judge uses a lower level of comedy in this movie than he did by using satire in Office Space. A lot of people would argue that he is satirizing the stupidity that runs rampant in our country right now, and he does to a certain extent. But flatulence isn't exactly the funniest thing in the world to me, and that type of humor is what comprises this movie. Luke Wilson is chosen for a military experiment and is cryogenically frozen. Although he is only supposed to be in hibernation for a year, something goes wrong and he doesn't wake up until 2505. When he awakens, he discovers a world that is full of dolts and nincompoops. This is where the 'humor' kicks in. Almost everything the stupid people say is intended to be funny, but it's usually just so dumb that I feel like my intelligence was lowered by just watching it. I laughed at a couple of occasions during the movie, and I really wanted this movie to make me laugh throughout. Mike Judge just missed on this movie. The movie's main message is the comparison between that future society and the world we live in today. Although some of the lines Judge drew in this parallel had some funny truths to them, a lot of it was just not funny and trying too hard. The movie was really crap, it involves cheesy romance, unfunny comedy, no character development and is really just a waste of time. I didn't even pay for this movie and I feel like I got ripped of. Save your money and your time, and go watch Office Space instead. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Dystopic comedy is only mildly funny from Buenos Aires, Argentina 25 March 2007 Mike Judge's dystopic comedy (which was barely released by its studio) is only mildly funny. It opens in the present, with average guy Joe (Luke Wilson) drafted by the military for a hibernation project. He is supposed to wake up in a year, but because of a mishap, he wakes up 500 years from the present. There he finds a society populated by morons. It seems that the intelligent didn't breed as much as the unintelligent, and the result five centuries from now is a society of astonishing vulgarity and coarseness, in a state of terminal decline. Here one has to add that the scientific premise behind this conceit is shaky: thinkers have noted and worried for centuries that the poor and unintelligent are having more babies than the rich and intelligent. Yet, despite this, IQ scores throughout the world have gone up, a probable result of increased education (and a refutation of genetic determinism). The movie is also somewhat racist: is it supposed to be a sign of decline the fact that the US president is now a black with a hispanic surname?. The movie's better when it hits at the corporate world, who has taken over every aspect of this future society. All in all, an ambitious but not very accomplished movie. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: It's not Office Space but it beats the hell out of Norbit from United States 20 February 2007 Nearly 2 decades ago Mike Judge struck gold with Beavis and Butthead on MTV. About a decade ago he struck again with the now cult-status Office Space. Now he provides us with the sleeper-hit Idiocracy. Done mostly in CGI and green screen, the films concepts and story lines are both fresh and original, which perhaps motivated the straight-to-DVD release. If Hollywood has learned anything it's that anything fresh, new, or original is scary (SEE: Norbit and Epic Movie's combined successes). Arguably as well, however, the movie is no immediate cult hit or must own gem. The film is funny as hell, and is in many ways reminiscent of a George A. Romero zombie flick. A lot of the films gags and jokes are visual like AIRPLANE!and play off the same nostalgic humor as Futurama (pay close attention to the billboards and signs in the background). The performances are hilarious as well, and in many ways save the movie at its weaker moments. Overall, this movie is more than worth renting and watching once. Its worth that much at least. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Funny movie ahead of its time but as depressing as Dr Strangelove in unvarnished truthfulness from Provo, Utah 11 February 2007 I thought Mike Judge wouldn't make another live action movie as evidenced by his years-long Salinger/Malick-esquire absence from movie-making after the hilarious Office Space, but Mr. Judge rebounded with another better-than-direct to video comedy movie appropriately titled Idiocracy. But regrettably not as great as Office Space in terms of consistent bull's eye on belly laughs. The movie have worn out its welcome into the hour, although it's a mercifully short movie. Another half an hour and it would be intolerable. Ironically, Stanley Kubrick chose to make "Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb" run less than 90 minutes to keep the tolerance level even without losing steam and that film, while funny with satirical physical comedy and verbal jabs, is incredibly depressing and demoralizing to watch the subsequent times. Idiocracy had a terrible marketing campaign, no doubt owing to the studio's appalled contention with the film's brutal, no-holds-barred condemnation of corporate irresponsibility & degradation of culture & morals in pursuit of avarice & corrupted favors. Mike Judge and the production crew of the movie shouldn't feel betrayed, because Idiocracy have already attained a cult film status owing to the story's prophecy ahead of its time under the context of sardonic perception with barely concealed harsh tone of the sociopolitical & socioeconomic satire imagined by Samuel Pepys, Mark Twain or Jonathan Swift (yes, I read good old books, thank you very much). I will not regale the plot in further explanation, I leave that to other user reviews, except to say that Luke Wilson and the cast did a good job developing the characters' wide range of personality to convincing comedic effect. Idiocracy is an enjoyable movie to watch but preferably not with the persons you know to be less than smart and susceptible to belligerence at the drop of a hat or a matter of mere misunderstanding. They will probably take grave offense to the movie and complain about how unfunny it is when the satirical point have been made to expose the utter apathy and stupidity of the American public in general. I would go so far as to compare the satirical element of Idiocracy to the better episode of The Simpsons whereas the majority of the general public might prefer the trashy likes of Seth MacFarlane's double serving of numbing dumbness & low-brow vulgarity Family Guy & American Dad. Yes, Mike Judge was responsible for the infamy that is Beavis & Butthead which have dumbed down MTV-addicted children & adolescent teenagers considerably back in the early 90's (sometimes with tragic results) but he redeemed his creation with the riotously hilarious Beavis & Butthead Do America. Whatever happened to Beavis & Butthead Do Hollywood? Looks like the particular set of characters' fame have faded and doomed to the 90's "Spike & Mike's Sick and Twisted Animations" aesthetics. Idiocracy almost isn't a good movie owing to minor lame subplots and endless train of expositionary dialogue, not to mention hitting the point with the equivalent of a sledgehammer. Still, it's a funny movie courtesy of Luke Wilson and another woman trying to fight their way out of the dumb society by using their "average" intellectual prowess and end up meeting the bizarre array of dumber-than-dog characters. Good film overall. I hope Mike Judge makes another movie, he's a great talent to watch out for! Fox, while responsible for neglecting the film in theatrical release, have a winner on its hands due to DVD rental blockbuster status and word of mouth. Not recommended for those who watch the movies casually and tend to take things too seriously if it challenges their belief, no matter how true. *** out of four from United States 7 February 2007 As a big fan of Office Space, I followed the story behind this film's release for two years. I felt like I was going to die if I didn't see the movie soon. And in my anxiety to see this film, I think I set my expectations a bit high. The film is hilarious, but don't expect the quality, and pure hilarity that made Office Space what it is. However, that doesn't mean it isn't one of the funnier comedies of 2006... it is. It contains some of the biggest laughs I've had with a movie all year. The film follows Joe Bowers, statistically the most average man in the military, who is chosen as a guinea pig for a human hibernation experiment the military is conducting. Along with a prostitute named Rita (Maya Rudolph), he is cryogenically frozen, and the two are almost instantly abandoned and forgotten when the base is shut down. Joe wakes up in the year 2505, where the world has sunk to the intelligence level of Beavis and Butt-head due to dumb people breeding far more than smart people. He is discovered by the people of the future to be the smartest man alive, and is unwillingly forced to solve all the world's problems... This film is one of the funniest movies of 2006. After such disappointing comedies this year as You, Me, and Dupree, and The Break Up, Idiocracy was a welcome gift. Mike Judge has always made me laugh my ass off. Beavis and Butt-head, King of the Hill, and Office Space are all comic genius, and combined with the seemingly endless release delays, my expectations went through the roof. Ultimately, the film made me laugh harder than half the movies released this year, but had some major, actually, near-fatal flaws, that were only saved by the brilliant jokes. First the good. Idiocracy is filled with hilarious jokes and sight gags, that will make you laugh just thinking about them. Watch for a great gag involving a Carl's Jr. vending machine and an unfit mother. Classic. The interesting thing is that the gags wouldn't be nearly as clever in any other premise. Simple dick n' fart jokes are made intelligent, as the people in the future think they're the funniest thing in the world. Also, jokes at the expense of major corporations such as Starbucks, Costco, Carl's Jr., Fuddruckers etc... are all priceless. As a social satire, the film is a masterpiece. As much as I hate to admit it, the idea that in the future, mankind will be dumbed down, is as logical an explanation as I can imagine. The film's hilarious prologue will help it make sense. And while it probably wouldn't be nearly as lighthearted as portrayed here, it's a believable scenario. Now the bad. The film feels incomplete, and isn't well put together at all. The set designs, and special effects are all good, but the story is rushed, and feels like it was edited in a day with little to no effort put into it. The story isn't used to it's full potential (Luke Wilson's attempt to help the future's crops grow is certainly funny, but isn't enough to carry most of a movie. More issues like these would have been great), and while the narrator is pretty funny, he starts to get tiresome after the first forty minutes, and basically just fills in for what could have been interesting plot development. If you thought Office Space was underdeveloped, this will make it look complete. Also, Maya Rudolph was annoying as hell (just real whiny, and overacts like mad). In most comedies, these problems could be seen past, but with the film's brilliant premise, I expected more. Idiocracy is to Office Space what Mallrats is to Clerks. Idiocracy and Mallrats are both very funny and entertaining, but both lack a certain charm that their predecessors had. Overall, the good outweighs the bad, and I give Idiocracy a 7/10. It is rated R for Language and Sex-Related Humor. Sex: 5/10 Violence: 3/10 Swearing: 6/10 Drugs: 4/10 Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Problematic 3 February 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I was looking forward to Idiocracy, and in many ways I wasn't disappointed. But the movie has a big problem: it appeals to two different and mutually exclusive audiences. Which are people with taste and people with no taste. The overall social satire and critical attitude to current society will be appreciated by the former, who on the other hand won't enjoy the vulgarity of most of the jokes. And vice versa. If you enjoy the jokes, then, by this movie's message, YOU are the problem. Whereas, if you have taste and don't enjoy the jokes, this movie is just not going to be that funny to you. The solution would have been to make the jokes really funny instead of just vulgar and stupid. As it is, this is halfway towards being a really funny and really good movie. But it doesn't quite get there. And another thing: IQ is not particularly hereditary. People in trailer parks do not necessarily have lower IQs than business execs (and evolution doesn't work that fast anyway). It's true that the poor are undereducated, but that's because they're poor. So the whole thing about the world succumbing to stupidity because only stupid people have kids... that just doesn't float. No way, no day. It's all about education. And given the opportunity, the kids of trailer trash will be just as brainy as rich kids. Still, that element of the movie can be put down to symbolism, so I'm not letting it detract from my rating. 8 out of 10. from United States 2 February 2007 Idiocracy is about a hooker and an average GI Joe who are forcibly volunteered to take part in a cryogenics program in the military. Of course the program goes wrong and the volunteers wake up 500 years in the future where a WWF wrestler has been elected president (from Minnesota I think) and the populations IQ is lower than a pregnant snakes belly. The film follows the volunteers around as they try and make it back to their own time while avoiding the pitalls of being average in a way below average society. (Ratings: Bad=1; Average=5; One of the best=10); Acting=05; Plot=08; Scenery=08; Character believability=07; Continuity=05; Dialog=05; Directing=08; Casting=07; Special effects=05; Overall Rating=06 Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Beavis and Butthead repopulate the earth from California 21 January 2007 This is the first non-animated work of Mike Judge I've ever seen. It wasn't bad. Mike Judge explores the idea of the future being a place overrun by dolts as opposed to being the technologically advanced place that most books and movies depict. It is only natural to believe that the future would be dominated by technology & science as we've steadily advanced towards such a future since the beginning of mankind. But what if intelligent people became a dying breed due to their decreased reproduction coupled with the rampant breeding of idiots? Mike Judge writes a comical work about that very idea. I found the movie to be humorous but still not that funny. It was definitely a lot more vulgar than I anticipated. As absurd as the movie was, there was a small bit of truth to it; and that was in the commercialization of everything. In this future everything was either fully or partially owned by some big brand company. Even the government was bought out by big businesses. But still, I would say the best thing about the movie is its brevity. At less than 90 minutes, Mike Judge did understand that a movie about complete buffoons could not go on too long. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Better than expected from New York 19 January 2007 Upon reading the synopsis for Idiocracy I thought, this is really going to stink or be really good. I did not see much of a middle ground option here. So I settled down to watch with remote control at the ready if I should find it unwatchable and came to be pleasantly surprised. The story line goes something like this; a couple of people are put to sleep in present time with the intention of waking them in 1 year for the sake of science. They are forgotten and wake up in the year 2550. Not so original I know, the catch is, they wake to a world that is so stupid from the total loss of intellectual stimuli, no one knows how to complete a simple sentence. The people of the future are glued to their TV's and watch such fodder as "Ow! My Balls!" (you can only guess what that show entails). The first person Luke's Joe Bowers meets, turns out later to be his lawyer and goes by the name Frito (Dax Sheppard). The president of the United States is known as President Camacho and is played by Terry Crews (White Chicks) who is always good for a laugh. His prowess in the Ultimate fighting ring has helped earn him his position. I know it all sounds silly but when taken as whole you will be entertained. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Think Brazil, only uplifting and much funnier from United States 18 January 2007 If you cringe at the social effect of rappers who give entire interviews consisting of "know what I'm sayin?" or big fat slobs toting around personal buckets of soda (is that just a Texas thing?), then you will laugh hard enough to wet yourself. To elaborate, I personally boycott the idea of paying $9 for theater admission and $5 for popcorn, just to sit alongside slack-jawed yokels through 15 minutes of Britney Spears ads before watching the same cars blowing up, wacky college guys getting hit in the balls, actors crying, etc. The only way I'll donate two valuable hours to watching a movie is if it provides the service of laughter. Now I know what many of you are thinking. "Shut up", or "this jerk is unamerican"... But that's my point. You won't understand this movie, because it's making fun of you. But if you are a keen social observer who gets frustrated from time to time with mass culture and simple-minded people, you will find Idiocracy to be beautifully cathartic. This movie is very similar to Beavis and Butthead. Lots of poignant social commentary in the form of lowbrow jokes... So much social commentary, that certain corporations (ahem, fox, ahem ahem) disallowed it to be reviewed, released, or marketed. This could be a lamentable condition, but look what happened when Office Space went to DVD. Idiocracy is a martyr! Please make more movies, Mr. Judge! And not in Louisiana!!!!! Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Best biting satire on current culture since Brazil! from United States 17 January 2007 GREAT movie about some of the things very wrong with America! A must see for anyone who doesn't think corporations should have the keys to America. If you like Mike Judge, you'll love this movie. If you like sci-fi, you'll appreciate the dystopian-dysfunctional references. If you like Gatorade, Carl Jr's, or Starbucks, you may be wildly offended. This is a nice response to not just anti-intellectualism, but also anti-thinkoccassionallyism. Classic performance by Luke Wilson. No one deadpans, looks more confused, or just annoyed better than him. Check this out and let Fox know they screwed up another promotional opportunity, just like with Office Space. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Feel-good Story of the decade, for the average Joe *** This review may contain spoilers *** Idiocracy makes you feel good about being normal. Mike Judge tells the stories of people ranging from average to mediocre. Office Space, King of the Hill, and Beavis and Butthead all cater to that point of view. Idiocracy continues that satirical legacy. This movie accomplishes the goal of provoking concern for the future and providing some laughs to a level that is attainable for any person who can bring him/herself to observe the world from a sociological perspective (Even someone illiterate! Video is in itself a simplification or lamens communication medium. I hope for the sake of my safety that nobody reads this message to anyone who falls into the category: disgruntled, muscle-bound illiterate). The 2505 characters were intentionally one-dimensional; but the protagonists characters also came out one dimensional. Some running gags went on a little too long. These are valid criticisms; but this movie is worth the watch. I would say that it is a modernized version of King Ralph. Attending average people is a setting present in many British comedy series (serieses? ha ha). For example Black Books and A Man About The House (the show that Three's Company was based on. Unfortunately Three's Company was too formulaic, always focusing on a misunderstanding or failed communication. A running gag that might work when you spread viewing out to an episode per week; but does not translate to marathon DVD viewing). Now that my long parentheses have been closed, I would like to contrast the aforementioned shows and movies with mainstream network shows. Friends, Seinfeld, Frasier: Network sitcoms are all about well to do urban socialites. Friends rarely satirizes the environment, because they are attempting to market this lifestyle. The comedy is frequently physical and accompanied with a laughter track (social engineering / Pavlovian?). Test marketing and focus groups must have shown that attractive actors keep the audience attention when nothing else is working. Seinfeld takes an approach that is more like a conservative application of running gags. An entire episode is devoted to a continuing joke (again, like Three's Company); but at least the idea is usually good enough to keep a bored person awake. Frasier is a minor improvement because it introduces the irony of mentally unhealthy, neurotic brothers who work in the field of mental health. I forgot Sex and the City. I haven't ever finished an episode, so I guess my comments might be a little off; but this show seems to focus on the lives of people belonging to the perceived upper echelon of society. Along with any funny moments, it is trying to normalize a way of life that is not realistic for most people. The constant toil of the characters (some of whom are career-centric) in their efforts to find mating partners as they age, is like a brief snapshot of the allegedly affluent couple in the beginning of Idiocracy. I have some recommended viewing for anyone who did enjoy Idiocracy. If you enjoy the theme of social commentary, try: Drawn Together, Weeds (drama), Extras (only some episodes are funny - be warned), Mumford If you enjoy the silliness: Team America, The Mighty Boosh, any Adult Swim show, Stella, Reno 911, Waiting... Hope this helps you decide whether to watch the movie (and potentially on some other shows and movies to watch Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Breath of Fresh Air from United Kingdom 31 December 2006 This movie is like a breath of fresh air, just finished watching it, if you get a chance to see this movie drop everything you are doing and go see it. I laughed my socks off all the way through, this must be a high budget film to achieve its desired goal it does with compromise. There is some good roll on the floor moments like when you see the face printed on the money, and when it first sinks in he is way into the future he looks out of the window to see the world. This goes down in my top 3 greatest comedy films of all time all long with Dumb & Dumber and Shallow Hall. Get of your butts and go and see this movie, say lowlife sent you you wont regret it. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: why it hasn't been advertised from United States 18 September 2006 i haven't seen this movie but i wanted to and it was taken out of theatres so fast , then i asked a friend who works at focus features who saw it months ago, why wasn't it advertised, if its a MJ movie? he said starbucks, carls jr and some other company sued, and thats why there was no money for advertising. i haven't seen it so i don't know what the movie says that makes those companies look bad, but there you go. ahh this stupid thing is making me write ten lines for some reason so here i am filling up space, this is lame who wants to read a really long comment anyway,maybe IMDb is owned by starbucks and carlsjr and they want me to give up trying to post this comment but I've got plenty of time to type and type until class starts and it lets me post this thing, someone better read this and stop going to starbucks and carls for this cos i am getting bored, Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Worth seeing from United States 10 September 2006 This movie isn't a knock out, but it's moderately entertaining. There are a number of slow scenes, but they are punctuated by enough decent laughs to make the experience tolerable. I had half a dozen hearty laugh out loud moments, but I also became bored with certain parts, and irritated with certain other parts. Luke Wilson's character in particular was annoying, but the surrounding cast picked up the slack. My favorite characters were Frito, who is his lawyer, and President Comchaka. They had enough good lines to keep me interested. After viewing it, I thought it was only okay, but later, I found myself recounting bits and pieces to my friends. Definitely good for the quotable bits, but this is a clear case where the whole is less than the sum of its parts. I can easily see this becoming a cult classic once it hits video and the stoner crowd starts spreading it by word of mouth. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: I expected Kornbluth. I got Butthead. 5 September 2006 *** This review may contain spoilers *** My local paper, The Dallas Morning News, gave this film a rating of "F." Although yesterday was Labor Day holiday, there were only three other patrons in the theater when I went to see this awful film. Guess everyone read the paper. The film was not as bad as I expected, or rather, as bad as the Dallas Morning News would have me believe. The plot was predictable to those who read 'The Marching Morons," but the trademark Judge satire made it a worthy successor. Dialog was solid, with occasional peaks of smirking or outright tittering. Production values (cinematography, sound) were definitely not on a par with such masterpieces as "My Super Ex Girlfriend" but that fault lies with inadequate funding, not poor planning. Now that I've had a day to think about it, I feel fortunate to be one of the very few to see this film in theatrical release. I predict that, like Office Space, this project will fade quickly, reappear in the bargain bin at The Movie Trading Company and quickly become a (pardon me for using this phrase) cult classic. It's got a lot going for it. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Idiocracy from United States 5 September 2006 I made the mistake of telling my wife and daughter that it was an Owen Wilson film. (I get Luke and Owen mixed up). They asked if it was the film with the Wilson brother with the crooked nose and I mistakenly said yes. They love Owen Wilson. They hated the film. I laughed through out the film. I was embarrassed to be there with my wife and daughter. They were expecting to see a Shanghai Noon, or Zoolander, or The Wedding Crashers, etc. Instead it was more like Beevis & Butthead, Jackass The Movie, or watching the Smackdown Wrestling programs, (not a "chickflick.") They hated it and told me I robbed them of 2 hours of their lives. My wife had to admit she laughed out loud as she watched Fuddrucker's transform its name 500 years into the future. If you are a Mike Judge fan go see before it disappears into the DVD pile at Hollywood Video. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Funny film with a thin plot from United States 3 September 2006 Idiocracy is not a bad movie, but it isn't a great movie like Office Space either. Judge has created a movie that is biting satire, even if it is a little obvious. The film begins with Luke Wilson's character working in a library at a military base, where he is seen as a real "average Joe," complacent with his station in life. He is selected to be frozen for a period of one year to test the new procedure and due to circumstances beyond his control, wakes up 500 years in the future in an America that encapsulates the said title of the film, where comedy ensues. Judge imagines a future obsessed with sex, bathroom humor, fast food, and money. Corporate logos are ubiquitous on street corners, clothing, and even in people's speech. Water has been replaced with a sports drink and if you're smart, people think you talk funny. Even more things are automated than they are in the present day, suggesting another reason for people's stupidity in this film. The sight gags are hilarious and the satire is on target most of the time. The plot is very thin though. All things considered, the film doesn't really need one. We can have fun for 90 minutes just observing the future that Judge has mapped out in this film what actually led to this mess in the first place. That might have been even funnier. However, studios know people won't watch a movie without a plot, action, love story, or other Hollywood conventions. So the pedestrian plot of trying to get back to the past is what we have to deal with. This is great, except for the fact it means everything needs to be neatly wrapped up in the third act, which is where this movie starts to falter. The humor that enveloped us for the rest of the movie isn't there and the ending becomes somewhat predictable. Overall, it's a funny film that isn't quite as good as Judge's more popular first feature film. There are many elements of the satire that are sly, keen observations about society, such as the dangers of too much automation in everything we do and our blind belief in products such as sports drinks. However, I don't believe this is the exact movie Judge wanted us to see and parts of it, including a very clumsy narration (Blade Runner anyone?) has studio intervention written all over it. Aside from looking a tad sloppy on the end, this is a funny movie and I hope more people get to see it. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Trump Supporters in a Nutshell.. 1 June 2016 *** This review may contain spoilers *** If you want to see who supports an idiot like Trump then look no further than this movie. It's suppose to be in 500 years from now but I see we are ahead of schedule. I like how the movie shows how it could happen too. Intelligent people doing the "smart thing" and waiting to have children while the trailer trash is having kids with anyone and everyone. By the time the smart couple is ready,it's too late. So don't wait? I ask everyone to watch this movie and consider it a warning. Be it denying climate change, guns everywhere, reality TV and the tea party hicks who eat it up. Knowledge is power. Get some! Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Movie has the same level as the things it is criticizing 30 April 2012 *** This review may contain spoilers *** The concept of the movie seemed really interesting to me. That society slowly became dumber and dumber because intelligence is no longer needed. Given this concept I expected a clever movie about 'normal' guy slowly gaining power in a world where he is considered extremely smart. This was not the case. The only thing this movie was, was 80 minutes of stating that the dumb people are really dumb. There were hardly any jokes in the movie and the jokes that were there weren't funny. The characters in the movie are also hard to relate to. Joe is the main character and he has average intelligence, but even Joe (the smartest guy in the movie) comes across as a really dumb guy. Joe agrees to an experiment to freeze him for a year and the viewer isn't given an explanation why a normal human being would agree to this. After being accidentally frozen for 500 years (he was forgotten, yeah, don't think to much about it) he ends up in an incredibly stupid world. But even when he witnesses all the stupidity in the world (including talking a prison guard in letting him go by using just one sentence) he still refuses to believe he is the smartest person on earth. You would also expect him to give up on reason to convince people and just use 'dumb' reasoning, given the fact it works on the prison guard. Instead Joe tries to go back to the past, assuming the people who don't know what water is have a time machine. Unexpectedly this doesn't work out in the end, but no worries, Joe falls in love with a prostitute from his own time. The prostitute named Rita was also frozen, but unlike Joe she manages to trick the dumb people into giving her money. In case you are wondering why Rita isn't the smartest person on earth: she is convinced her pimp will travel through time to get his money from her. In the end Joe and Rita end up together and there is a happy ending (they get married and have children). The happy ending is confusing, because it suggests that living in a dumb world is completely fine after all. But this movie doesn't show two people ending up in a inferior world, it shows a movie where two people end up where they belong. I don't recommend this movie if you expect a clever movie criticizing the current manner in which things are handled. I recommend this movie if you want to restore your faith in the current society. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Idiocracy was extremely clever! from United States 14 October 2010 Luke Wilson was absolutely perfect for this role. I cannot picture anyone else for this part. I LOVE this movie. It is extremely clever and just overall hilarious. There are times when you have to pay close attention to catch all of the little clever jokes. They are continuous throughout the film. Careful, or you will miss some. It was extremely comical and clever. I was very, very impressed by it but, it makes you think about the future of humanity. Be prepared to be afraid. Some of the jokes in the film are based on real life events or shows that are already in existence. It makes you realize that as technological and advanced the human race is, we are becoming a dumbed down society. One thing I also really liked was the narration. It fades in and out to the point where it blends right in. It just flows and fits right in. Everyone must see this movie! It is definitely one of my favorites. I was so very impressed by it in every way. Ridiculously clever and hilarious. Go see it ASAP. You will forever be quoting this movie and referencing the funny jokes and situations. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Funniest movie ever!!! from Croatia 18 February 2010 There are so many funny details that the best thing to do is buy the blu-ray and watch this movie at least 20 times. When democracy is system of rule among idiots you get idiocracy. How does idiocracy look 500 years in the future? What does technology look like? Why people became stupid at all? If you compare this movie to the present you may find similarities. We are not that stupid yet, but we are going in the right direction. The movie is in fact the possible future of mankind and that future is indeed funnily presented. As funny as it gets. As funny as Charlie Chaplin, but not so reliant on gags. It mostly relies on clever satire of todays world. It is funny as hell. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: dumbed-down world is exactly what we've become from Portland, Oregon, USA 25 August 2008 More than just a silly comedy, Mike Judge's "Idiocracy" is also a look at the possible fate of a society that suppresses intellectualism and does everything possible to the most brainless sectors. The plot has not-too-intelligent Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson) getting frozen in an experiment and waking up 500 years later in a society where stupidity reigns supreme, meaning that he's now the most intelligent person alive! While this may qualify as a stupid movie, it's only because it shows what happens when a society lets itself get brainwashed and commercialized to the point that a "high quality" movie is a two-hour shot of somebody's butt (I dare you to laugh at that!). Even in our society today, some people treat knowledge as "elitism"; the opposite is of course a TV show about repeated injuries to a man's crotch. But whether or not that's supposed to dominate the movie, you gotta love the president's State of the Union address, the Rehabilitation, or any discussion of Brawndo. I certainly recommend the movie. And seriously, what would YOU think of a society in which all speech is a mixture of hillbilly nonsense, valley girl talk, and inner city slang? Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: the smartest/stupidest movie you didn't get to see in theaters (most likely) from United States 17 May 2007 Strange that, despite Mike Judge's previous successes with Office Space and King of the Hill, that the film was made at 20th Century Fox. Judge, with his co-writer Cohen, are lampooning the very things that end up keeping Fox in bread and butter so often. Not to put a very one-sided face on what Fox represents as worthwhile entertainment or just worth for the public (Fox News is another matter), but Judge might have taken a guess that taking aim at big corporate interests in their conglomeration methods (albeit Judge doesn't back down from naming Starbucks, Gatorade and Fuddruckers), the boom in births from those with the lowest common denominators for brains, and just society in general might tick off some of the studio execs. Nevertheless, it is still something of an outrage to see what was done to Idiocracy upon original release; limited, oddly enough, to theaters in the Midwest and southwest areas, with nothing on the east coast and northeast especially, it was buried and left for the DVD scrap piles. It might be that they, like test-audiences, didn't quite get what it was that Judge was trying to convey with his in-your-face satire. Idiocracy has the premise as follows: an average Joe, named Joe (Luke Wilson), and a prostitute (Maya Rudolph) who's pimp is named Upgrayedd, are chosen by the army to be frozen as part of an experiment, which goes wrong, and the two of them awaken hundreds and hundreds of years later, when human civilization has turned into unadulterated, libido-crazy morons. Morons as in they're only about 1 IQ point, more or less really, apart from Judge's previous creations Beavis and Butt-head. Joe is seen as the smartest man alive, and so is put in charge of seeing why there aren't any crops growing- Gatorade instead of water, which is thought of as strictly toilet-bowl fodder- and uses that as his side-line while looking for a time machine. All through this, Judge throws one big visual gag after another and, more often than not, they end up sticking in ways that end up combining many of Judge's strengths from B&B and Office Space. It's intelligent stuff that pretends to be aimed at the same lowest common denominator, and ironically one ends up laughing like the same idiot watching repeatedly on TV a guy get kicked in the nuts every which way to Sunday. There's more gags to come, more than one could think would be possible, and as a result there is a case nearly of overload. Luckily many of the targets- Fox News, the executive office of America (if an office could be called that), the various products all laid out as having tie-ins with getting people off, which is all that the public really has on their minds in their paths to immediate gratification- are hit usually just right. When it starts to come down to actual character Judge is a little more sloppy; the whole rapport between Wilson and Rudolph never totally clicks, with Joe/Not Sure (his name as given during a machine's obvious idiotic taking of Joe's ID picture) not really getting that Rita is a prostitute but works as a painter's assistant back in past times. When it comes to that, unlike Office Space, Judge doesn't have much in way of character chemistry. Which is fine; he and his crew have more to tackle in ways of elaborate visuals and would-be matte paintings (look at that garbage problem!), that character has to be limited in this case. The points aren't necessarily subtle, but then again, when all is said and done, the filmmaker gets his points across. What is it about living in a country that becomes homogenized to the point of no recognition when education is nil, the birth rates aren't made more equal (how many Jethros and Mattie-Maes can there be in this world, lets face it), and corporations contribute all the more to the "dumbing down" of culture- in quotes as that it's sort of an equal partnership in getting dumbed down. This is more than likely what the studio didn't really grasp, was that the joke wasn't necessarily just on them, but on many other facets of society. It's an ambitiously good comedy, if falling short of a great one, that asks some keen questions amid the rampant sex and flatulence and monster truck and stereotype-assaulting jokes. One can only hope, maybe many many years from now, it'll catch on. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Funny, Scary & Sad... Mike Judge paints a cautionary tale. 10 February 2007 When I first saw the previews for this film, I wasn't sure what to expect. All of the satirical allusions were actually more depressing than funny – the over-emphasis on sex, the complete brutalization of the English language, the animosity toward intellectuals and labeling anyone that uses words with more than two syllables as a "f**." I see this form of idiocy in full effect today, we don't need a futuristic fiction when this level of horror is already here. There were some truly hilarious moments in this film but most of them can already be witnessed by observing society today ("I like money"). If the jibes at today's "urban" culture and deep-south felt too stupid to be true, turn on your local news or visit a local mall. If ignorance annoys you, this film is not for you. Sadly, the truth this satire presents will fall on deaf ears; "Dis moo-E don't av Enuff boo bees n' sh*t, yo." This review may come off as one pompous ass' diatribe on our society's devolution but, in a world where grown men playing with balls and fat, ex-playboy models are deified ...I'm fairly sure Mike Judge shares my concern enough to make this film. All in all, I could see this film garnering a cult following (to the likes of Judge's other works). Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Either really dumb or absolutely brilliant from Sweden 10 February 2007 I'll be perfectly frank: I did not like this film, and did not find it particularly funny. However, I wouldn't want to review it as such, since that would be boring – and I am quite certain it's a brilliant satire, if that makes any sense. Too many satires are dismissed as being exactly what they satirize (Natural Born Killers mistaken to be too "violent" just makes me shake my head). "Idiocracy" is so dumb to the core in its humour that at one point I just realised this HAD to be a satire – of studios, contemporary society and trailer trash culture. The basic set-up caught my attention the minute the universal logo appeared and a narrator explained the Darwinism-gone-wrong process that prompted a world filled with idiots. Survival of the fittest has never implied survival of the smartest; it is simply a question of who procreates at the most rapid speed. In humans, this is typically the below average intelligent people such as rednecks, the less educated, trashy celebrities, et al, and as a result – over many generations – the intelligent alleles have all been replaced by dumb ones. There is satire even in this. Too many films employ narrators who explain absolutely everything even when it is already clear to the viewer. The new idiocratic world speaks a language that is derived from Valley girl speech, inner city slang and slack-jawed hillbilly. Starbucks has become synonymous with handjobs. In all seriousness, if you thought Blade Runner, Children of Men or other bleak Orwellian science fictions showed terrifying visions of the future, you are in for one hell of a nightmare. The scariest thing is that it could theoretically happen, and to an extent this natural selection process is already occurring in our species. It is in a way a pity that Fox orphaned this project, no trailers, no nothing, for that just displays their misunderstanding of the film's nature. Although I didn't find "Idiocracy" to be hugely entertaining, it moved so earnestly at such a brisk and condensed pace that ultimately it is an altogether harmless film. 6 out of 10 from Seattle, WA 12 January 2007 Idiocracy (2006) dir: Mike Judge "And people wrote movies. Movies which had stories. Stories which made you care about whose ass it was and why it was farting." Mike Judge has made works I've adored for years. I was an avid watcher of Beavis and Butt-head when that show was first aired on MTV. I found the humor in it when somebody sued because they claimed that kids in a trailer park were imitating the show, and it was not true. I found humor in King of the Hill, the more humanistic side of laughing at stupidity. You realize that stupid people are people too. I saw Office Space during its short and unimpressive run in theaters before people found it on video and took people to watch it for free since I worked at the theater. Now, I have to say that Mike Judge has become shrill. There is a difference between making fun of the idiots among us and mocking a generalized world of idiots. The former is a good way of holding a microscope to what the world is. The latter is an overly aloof form of exaggeration and snarky humor. And, the latter is Idiocracy. Idiocracy is a science fiction comedy where the most average man in the military, Joe (Luke Wilson), and a whore, Rita (Maya Rudolph), are frozen in time for 500 years to find that the world now consists only of morons. Due to the intelligent people's inability to breed prolifically and a lack of human predators, stupid people were allowed to spread the seed constantly, and eventually wiped out intelligent people. Now, Joe and Rita have to face a future which has been over corporatized and dumbed down on every level. In this future, Costco now sprawls for miles with a tram and wildlife. Sex and violence have taken over as prime entertainment. A movie called Ass, which is 90 minutes of some persons ass on screen farting, won 8 Oscars. Water has been replaced by Brawno, a Gatorade-esquire sports drink. And, language has devolved into a mix of all the low slangs. Unfortunately, Idiocracy is nothing but a pile of complaints and rantings coming off as no more insightful than your average teenage internet flamer on whatever newsgroup/community/message board you read. With almost no insight into what the source of the problems are, it is very aimless and rootless. However, some things just are downright funny. It isn't all a bad movie. It has moments of pure genius, like the Carl's Jr stand which criticizes you, or the avalanche of garbage. The opening scene ranting about the birth rate of idiots versus academics is worth the price of rental alone. But, it is kind of annoying watching a movie that say that everybody's dumb 100 times over and has no faith in humanity. On the other hand, it is just what some people need. A good swift kick in the nuts. B- from United States 27 September 2006 This is a good movie, I enjoyed it. When we got to the theater (in LA) there was no poster, no title on the marquee. I thought it wasn't playing there till my grown son filled me in; no marketing, no trailer, no poster because the corporations satirized in the movie are PO'd about how they are portrayed. The corporations will or have filed suit about their images in the film, reason enough to go see it. The filmmakers have touched a raw nerve, obviously, and it is the nerve of truth. The society of the movie's future is here. Anybody who sees this movie will recognize it as soon as you leave the theater. It may be less apparent in some other parts of the country, but in LA it cannot be ignored. Stupidity is revered, the thin-skinned denizens often react like toddlers without thought to everything that "offends" them, vulgarity rules, concepts of community are abandoned in favor of the selfish and adolescent. People no longer have or use critical thinking skills against the voices of "authority," which are the few mega-corporations left which control everything. See summary. I enjoyed the huge-voiced, '50's style narration. Viewers would do well to pay serious attention to its message even more than the messenger. But you won't leave depressed; it's a laugh out loud in places, and a caveat. Go see it. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: The smartest comedy about overwhelming stupidity you're ever likely to see from Los Angeles, CA 18 September 2006 A great deal has been made about the baffling lack of support 20thi Century Fox has shown Mike Judge's latest film, and for good reason. Idiocracy is one of the sharpest laugh-out-loud funny comedies to come out of Hollywood in quite some time. By the same token, it could be said that for not having the foresight of seeing frame one of this movie before viewing it in the theater, I had the luxury of and entirely fresh experience. I had little in the way of expectations, and the movie was full of wonderful surprises. Not to say that this movie is a unique and original concept. The plot is cribbed from familiar and well-worn territory (Futurama, Blade Runner, Brazil, Demolition Man, March of the Morons, Planet of the Apes, etc). What makes this film distinct from its predecessors is its dark, cynical, and downright angry tone. Judge aims his satirical guns with full force at the culture, particularly American pop-culture, with everything he's got. He doesn't hit his target with every shot, but when he does, he levels it to the ground. A hilarious prologue that illustrates why evolution begins to reverse as, intelligent people fail to produce offspring while idiots breed like rabbits. The movie then follows Joe Bowers (Luke Wilson), an all-around average, unassuming guy who has been selected to be cryogenically frozen in a military experiment alongside a prostitute named Rita (Maya Rudolph). Due to governmental oversights, they're mistakenly left in suspended animation until accidentally awoken 500 years in the future; a future populated by nothing but stupid people. Hollywood is no stranger to the idiot character, from the Forrest Gumps and Dumb & Dumbers to current crop of movies that includes the likes Talledega Nights, Beer Fest, and Jackass Number Two. However, most of movies often tend to romanticize and celebrate the moron as a doe-eyed innocent, childlike and naive. Not so with Idiocracy. This film takes a decidedly ugly, hateful view of the ignorance and degradation of our culture. You might ask, "Where's the funny?" after reading the above description. Well, Mike Judge seems to take great delight in mocking and skewering the mindless stupidity of pop-culture. This is common territory for him, as with King of the Hill and Beavis and Butthead. With his previous work, though, he'd merely been scratching at the surface. In Idiocracy, he unleashes his satiric wrath like an exploding volcano. The film is certainly not without its flaws. Unlike Office Space, which was a wonderfully smart and clever comedy, Idiocracy predictably needs to rely on far less intelligent humor at times. A film about incredibly stupid people isn't going to present itself with much in the way of smart, instantly quotable dialog. Sometimes this can become a bit tiresome. Judge often attempts to compensate by loading the screen with tons of visual humor. I felt Office Space was brilliant in creating its absurd, yet all-too-real world of office culture, but once it got wrapped up with its largely disposable "plot" involving corporate embezzlement, it nearly imploded on itself. Idiocracy suffers from a similar problem in so much as, once its world has been fully realized, Judge seems to be at a loss for what his characters should actually do. I hope this gets a chance at becoming the cult-film I think it deserves to be. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: mirror from United States 14 September 2006 I think a lot of people don't get the movie is cause they are living in 2505 and they don't like the idea of someone making fun of them I'm sorry for how you feel but it's just a movie and we don't have to get all bent out of shape you probably have to see it again to really understand it look just the other day I heard that a company fired it's workers by e-mail maybe we are closer than we think if they release the movie on DVD I will buy it but I still think Mike Judge got a raw deal their have been other movies that should have not come out but they did it's all a gamble they should have roll the dice and see the outcome it's like FOX has no money well it seems that the Alamo Draft House in Austin is the only place you can see the movie at so that tells me their are people out their that still want to see the movie so don't believe every thing you read go see the movie and enjoy it, so what if notice some of us are living in 2505 we need try and help each other to make a differece but it starts with you. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Criminally unadvertised from United States 12 September 2006 I was fortunate enough to be visiting Texas while this movie was playing. Fortunate because it wasn't showing anywhere close to where I live (the lack of advertising, theater count, or backing of any kind for this film is astounding) Mike Judge has yet to make anything that was less than great, and Idiocracy, while not without it's flaws, is no exception. The story of the movie is of Pvt. Bowers (Luke Wilson) who is selected by the military for a top secret cryonics program solely based on his 'averageness' and the fact that he has no family or friends that would miss him. He's frozen with a Rita, a hooker (Maya Rudolph) because the Pentagon couldn't find a military female who fit the same criteria. When the program is shut down and forgotten about, Bowers and Rita don't wake up for quite awhile. When they do, they find society is mentally retarded due to idiots breeding much faster than smart people. Blending scathing social commentary with juvenile humor, Idiocracy has many more hits than misses and I found myself laughing out loud for a good duration of the film. Maya's character must have looked hilarious on paper but she's horribly unfunny in the film and is pretty much a waste. However that's the only thing hampering an otherwise great film. Is it as good as "Office Space"? No, but what really can ascend to those heights of greatness?? However it's still a very worthy successor. My Grade: B+ from Austin, TX 8 September 2006 I have to admit that my expectations were pretty low for this film due to the limited release, zero advertising and lack of even a short trailer (its listing was also removed from the New Release section of 20th Century Fox's website). I was pleasantly surprised to find a movie that was well put together and had pretty good production values. I had some pretty good laughs during this movie and anyone who enjoys Mike Judge's other works (Office Space, King of the Hill, etc) should too. I believe many people... sorry the few who actually hear about this movie and also happen to watch it will be pleasantly surprised too. Fox is 'idiotic' for trying to kill this film. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 6 people found the following review useful: Very funny, not surprised at lack of support. 11 September 2006 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I really enjoyed this film as I do Mike Judge's work in general. It is no surprise that the studio lacked the nerve to promote it as the corporations today have little sense of humor when it comes to their precious images. With the amount of money thrown at other projects that have little to offer, it is a sad statement that they are reluctant to promote/publicize a project that encourages people to read! The portrayals of the government, giant retailers, the media are all very pointed and accurate as a prediction, but not 500 years from now, maybe only 50. I especially laughed at the news anchors, and TV shows! Couldn't the show "Jack-ass" and the films "Jack-ass" and "Jack-ass 2" be a predecessor to "OW, my balls"? Or Americas funniest home videos for that matter! Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Excellent concept but it didn't work out quite as well as I'd hoped from United Kingdom 27 February 2016 Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson) is defined by everyone as being an average American and is deemed to be the perfect man to take part in a top-secret Hibernation Project. The intention of this programme is for Bauers to be put to sleep and awoken after 1 year. However, a government scandal results in the closure of the facility and sadly Bauers is forgotten about for not 1 year, but 500 years!!! Bauers awakens after being asleep for 500 years and discover that society as he knows it has devolved almost beyond repair so much so that he is now the smartest man in the world. Given the rather promising concept I really hoped that this would prove to be a biting, witty satire as well as being a film that brought about a consistent run of jokes, but sadly Mike Judge's Idiocracy is very much hit and miss on both fronts.... Maybe it's just me but when I looked at the write up and learned that this was a satirical comedy I was actually expecting a lot of good satire. I thought that the new world that Bauers now inhabited would be explored and critiqued, but sadly much of this potential was wasted by Judge not really thinking the idea through and really only having 2 running gags throughout the film (all the inhabitants of the new world are stupid and that they mistake Bauers clear speaking voice and articulate manner as being a weakness because it makes him sound gay). These examples of critique aren't bad per se, but they become repetitive and become less and less funny each time you hear them. The courtroom scenes were ridiculous and seemed more farcical than satirical or funny. Although I've been negative in the previous paragraph I have to admit that some of it was actually quite amusing; I liked the scenes in the hospital and Bauers being assigned the name of 'Not Sure' due to a computer not understanding him was pretty funny too - anyone who has tried to use voice recognition systems can probably relate to this, even though, naturally, this has been exaggerated slightly in the film. Amidst all of the uneven writing and chaos in this picture Judge has remembered to make the film have a positive feel to it by allowing the protagonist to use his 'superior' intelligence for the good of humankind(I won't say anymore than that though). Many of the characters are fairly likable as well which also helps (although Bauers lawyer was more irritating than funny). Idiocracy doesn't totally work and wasn't the biting or witty satire that I was hoping for and it wasn't as clever or funny as I would have liked either. Having said that it has enough positively and likability to make it worth a watch and did prove to be quite funny at times as well. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: The scathing wit is its charm from United States 15 September 2015 It probably says a lot that "Idiocracy" has become a sort of shorthand for how our culture continues to decline (right up there with "going postal" to describe a conniption. Every time you hear about a candidate for the Darwin Awards, you think this movie (more specifically, that it's one step closer to reality). The movie takes our society to some absurd (yet, sadly, still close to home) lengths, and Mike Judge is having a blast doing it. The president knows how to play the crowd like saps, fast food has become pretty much just Carl's Jr. (a dystopia if ever there was one) and the citizenry are literally slack-jawed morons. This is where the movie excels, although as a comedy, it's no "Office Space". It's fairly uneven, the hero's narrative loses steam in the second half, but you're too busy laughing at the scathing opinions of Costco and Starbucks to really let that be a deal-breaker. 6/10 Author: SnoopyStyle 24 August 2015 Without thinning the herd, society gets dumber with each generation as idiots procreate more than smart people. Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson) is happy to be slacking off. He is the most average recruit without any family connections. The Army picks him and hooker Rita (Maya Rudolph) for the Human Hibernation Experiment. The base is closed after a scandal and the project is forgotten. Instead of frozen for one year, they are reawaken after 500 years. Humanity has gotten really stupid and Joe is now the smartest person on earth. This is a funny idea looking for a funny movie. Luke Wilson doesn't do much more than a straight man in a crazy world. The world is single note. Some of it is fun. There aren't that many big laughs but it is just fun enough. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Great Concept, but Disappointing from United States 7 July 2013 A movie by Mike Judge, and I'm a fan of his work, Beavis & Butthead and Office Space, so I wanted to like this, but honestly it's disappointing. The story has a funny concept that in the future people get more stupid, and these two average people would be the smartest people in the future, but most of the incidents and events happen in the movie are not funny, here are so much potential and ideas to play with and represent them well to make the audience laugh. However, I feel like Mike Judge is forced to direct and finish this movie, somehow, I feel he hasn't put his best attention and strength to make this movie. The cast is fairly good, Maya Rudolph is sexy and a funny person, Luke Wilson can play a funny character (as he did in Oldschool) but none of these actors can't do anything more because the script is not that funny, they don't have funny dialogue. There are few moments that make you smile or laugh, but in my opinion the audience gets bored for most of the part. I really wanted to like this but ended to be totally disappointed. I need to watch something really good to forget about this movie, I give 5/10. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: If you think this is funny, you're part of the problem Author: Some Dude 4 April 2013 This movie is not funny. There are some mildly humorous parts, but it is primarily full of bad attempts at jokes, lame sight gags, and general stupidity. The concept is also a fairly straightforward rip-off of Futurama so even that isn't original. It is, however, pretty good satire and a chilling picture of devolution in action. It is a fact that birth rates are declining in the West and that it is below average for above average people. We've already started down the path that could lead to the future depicted in this film. All smart people should take the warning to heart and make some kids right away. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: A Satire that I'm not convinced works... from United States 12 December 2012 This is no doubt satire about a "dumbing-down" of American society. I no doubt agreed with the message of the film. I just don't know that it didn't contribute to the very thing that it satires. Mike Judge has written some hilarious social commentary in the past, but the cartoonish characters of even the main character and the people that we were supposed to understand as average made some of the messages ring hollow. Making comments about developing good film in a film with cartoonish writing just comes off as unwittingly oblivious to your own skills as a writer. It reminds me of an interview where Chevy Chase makes a snarky comment about lazy comedies. Someone next to him had to remind him that he starred in several Vacation movies. I liked Idiocracy. I would indeed see it again. I just think that the writing of Wall-E did successfully what the writing of Mike Judge did rather clumsily here. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Sadly too true to life from United States 22 September 2011 I had a chance to see this film prior to the final edit at a film festival. It is under-appreciated for what it is; a reflection on our culture. I believe now, 5 years after the release, it is funnier than when it came out, given the state of our politics and culture. The characters are great, given that Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph are the only two actors that have had compelling roles other than this one. Dax did a great job as the sidekick. Great film, compared to most of the offerings in 2011. The plot is simple and the main gag; we are getting dumber over the generations doesn't escape the many opportunities to exaggerate the point of the film. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Stupid smarts. from Maine 14 October 2009 Mike Judge, director of the cult classic "Office Space" as well as the creator of TV's "Beavis & Butthead" and "King of the Hill," delivers perhaps his most outlandish and most imaginative work to date in "Idiocracy." Luke Wilson ("Old School") and Maya Rudolph ("Away We Go") play subjects of a military experiment gone wrong who find themselves waking up in the year 2505, when mankind has devolved to the point of uselessness and near-extinction, brought on by needless over-breeding, poor dietary choices and mind-numbing television. Wilson plays the slacker and Rudolph a prostitute, and both turn out to be the strongest and smartest in a world gone terribly, terribly wrong. "Idiocracy" is the kind of wacky yet centered cautionary tale that only the mind of Mike Judge could produce, but unfortunately loses steam half way through when its narrative is given nowhere to go, giving way to a slightly clichéd Hollywood ending that doesn't quite gel with the overall tone of the rest of the movie. It's a shame that the film bogs itself down in simplicity when much of the material at hand is rife with social commentary and oh-so subtle jabs at its viewer as well as its production company, Twentieth Century Fox (who, in turn, abused the film so badly that it was an inevitable flop). There's heavy usage of CGI to convey a trash avalanche as well as a monster-truck jam of sorts that gives the movie an unintentionally cartoonish look and feel. Surprisingly, though, it works in the film's favor, giving the film a wacky tone when it could easily slide into gloomier territory. It also doesn't hurt to have left-field cameos from the likes of Justin Long, Stephen Root and Thomas Haden Church, either. In the end, it's a film with bold ideas that doesn't quite reach its potential. Still, though, like much of Judge's other work, it will have you thinking and questioning the world around you. Is "Idiocracy" ahead of the curve, foreshadowing the shape of things to come? Well, only time will tell. As for now, enjoy it for the sublimely ridiculous comedy that it is. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: This represents an original look into the future of society 14 June 2009 *** This review may contain spoilers *** This represents an interesting vantage point on the future of humanity in which I have never seen anyone else present before. They make an interesting argument and it seems like it could actually happen in real life because they use evolution as an argument. People don't really need any intelligence or any skills at all to survive in society because they have machines that can take care of it, so the only thing which evolution requires is the ability to reproduce more and stupid people tend to do that a lot more, so smart people might die out in the next hundred years if we don't do anything about it. I mean their problem where they had their crops were destroyed because they did not use water is pretty stupid because the machines would take care of it. You know one thing that is considerable is why isn't there more fat people because it is highly likely that there would be more of them too but fat people cannot reproduce so it is quite an interesting situation... I like that this movie shows how humanity could turn stupid but I don't like it when the movie itself is stupid as such I cannot give this more then a 6/10. This movie is really a lot like Wall-E but I think Wall-E is definitely better so I would recommend that first. I gave Wall-E a 7/10 so I cannot give this movie any higher then that. Anyways bombarding you with all that stupidity throughout that movie can kind of make you feel stupider yourself in the end. I think the movie would do much better by reducing the amount of time in it by approximately 30 minutes. I mean for the first thirty minutes or so it was definitely all good when they were introducing the whole situation and the trash avalanches and such, but later some of the things were just too stupid. I would boost this to an 8/10 if it was shorter. Right now I leave it as a 6/10. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: The Marching Morons from United States 31 May 2009 i watched this movie because i loved a VERY SIMILAR story Cyril M. Kornbluth. maybe the fear of being sued explains the lack of marketing. still a funny movie with a real message... "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Marching_Morons" "The Marching Morons" is a science fiction short story written by Cyril M. Kornbluth, originally published in Galaxy in April, 1951. It was included in The Science Fiction Hall of Fame, Volume Two after being voted one of the best novellas up to 1965. The story is set hundreds of years in the future: the date is 7-B-936. John Barlow, a man from the past put into suspended animation by a freak accident involving a dental drill and anesthesia, is revived in this future. The world seems mad to Barlow until Tinny-Peete explains the Problem of Population: Due to a combination of intelligent people not having children and excessive breeding by less intelligent people, the world is full of morons, with the exception of an elite few who work slavishly to keep order. Barlow, who was a shrewd con man in his day, has a solution to sell to the elite. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: fantastic movie from Netherlands 19 March 2009 me and a bunch of my friends went to the video store yesterday we wanted some movies to make us laugh we borrowed burn after reading, disaster movie and idiocracy. disaster movie was.....well....a disaster burn after reading had its moments and idiocracy was hilarious. The movie is full of low brow humor to build up and then smack you with some laugh out loud humor if you have nothing to do and just want to have a good laugh i would most certainly recommend this movie. On that note i must say this is some of Luke Wilson's funnier movies all my friends agreed too it was a definite laugh but disaster movie on the other hand.....ughh....just don't watch that we turned that *beep* off about 40 minutes in...no plot at all just random *beep* happening. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: A comedy film with one of the sharpest wits I've ever seen. from United Kingdom 6 September 2008 I came on here after seeing this film expecting it to be rated at least in the 7s. I have not watched a film, or indeed anything else, that made me laugh as much and with such satisfaction in a very long time. Idiocracy takes a simple but brilliant comic idea and runs with it. The true achievement of this movie is that it keeps this idea entertaining for a full 2 hours and even manages to deliver a 'punch line' (if you will) that would make many talented stand up comedians jealous. The satire and reflection on our modern day culture present in this film is both hilarious and at the same time frighteningly relevant. You could watch this and laugh until you cry or feel frankly scared for the future of the human race. Within the first few minutes it delivers an observation so sharp and amusingly presented that it justifies watching the film alone. The film is packed with so much great dialogue and background visual humour (rivalling that of The Simpsons and Futurama) that it became exhausting to keep up the frequency of laughs required. I'm sure that if this film had not been made a comedian would have picked up on the idea eventually but I don't think they could do it the justice that the medium of film does here. You could argue with many valid points that this is not a good film on certain levels but as a piece of observational comedy and satire I think that it is outstanding. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: A Nutshell Review: (DVD) Idiocracy (2006) from Singapore 24 August 2008 Mike Judge is best known for, and probably cut his teeth with his razor sharp sarcasm and wit on his Beevis and Butt-Head series. How does he perform now with live action and comedy set in a futuristic science fiction genre? Not a bad piece of entertainment for a rainy Sunday afternoon, though not exactly laugh out loud material from start to end. The jokes here failed to go beyond the sight gags of making fun of conglomerates and fast food joints such as Carl's Jr, and I wonder how those executives take to their companies being made the butt of many jokes in the movie. Also, there seemed to be a pre-occupation with sex and money, with a number of jokes relying on the quick and the dirty to draw in the laughs. Sadly though, these fell really flat, as you could see them coming from a mile away, and unfortunately having the punch lines delivered without much impact. However, the story though, had a lot of potential and actually set one thinking, especially in the current climate of low population figures here, and the local authorities getting into a frenzy to try and promote pro-family lifestyles, and dangling incentives to get our citizens to procreate to sustain a future. While we had this graduate-graduate pairing in hope to having intellectuals born to intellectuals, one wonders if the incentives would make any dent to these folks' ambition anyway when they work out the disincentives to having children, and the nightmare situation depicted here, is to have the dumb and dumber contribute the numbers, and well, dumb down the entire population gene pool. Scary thought eh, when natural selection goes to the dogs. I hope I do not sound condescending here (and it's not my intent), but that forms the basis of Idiocracy, where the smart folks fail to re-populate themselves, and society in general have contributions coming from the less-intellectual because of their free loving, devil-may- care upbringing and irresponsibility. So given 500 years into the future, an average person leading an average life here, might seem as a genius to that dumbed down era. And that's exactly what happens to Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson), an average Private in the armed forces who gets "volunteered" into a top secret program of soldier-hibernation, of keeping combat fit soldiers for the future to be used for conflicts then, when there's peacetime now. And in a comedy, you'd come to expect things go awry at a drop of a hat, and the bulk of the jokes come from being in a dumb society who speaks improperly, and where the top-rated television programme is a Jackass clone. Sight gags go into overdrive here, and props keep things looking futuristic. But alas the story moves from set piece to set piece, following Joe through from a hospital, to court room, to jail, and finally to the White House, where he's made Secretary of the Interior to try and clean up the agricultural problem, and all the while trying to get new found friend Frito (Dax Shepard) to get him to a time-machine so that he can journey back 500 years to 2005. The less illustrious of the Wilson brothers, Luke does pull off the exasperated Mr Average role here with aplomb, but the rest of the cast seem to go over the top with their performance as idiots, and made it a little difficult to sit through stilted performances, with some incredibly banal dialogue trying to pass off as humour. Like I mentioned, it could've been genuinely funny but it didn't, but thankfully it had its premise set up nicely, and provided food for thought of a future that could have Mother Nature pull a fast and funny one on mankind. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: The idea is great, but the movies wasn't what I thought it was going to be like. 20 July 2008 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I think the idea of this film is great, but could be done so much better than it was. Why would you ever cast Dax for anything he is not a good actor at all. I did not like in the beginning how they came to be in the future by being forgotten about in coffin like structures by the military. The idea that society could dumb itself down by only the morons repopulating the earth is great and could possibly happen maybe. I thought it was great when Owen Wilson was the smartest man because he could place different shaped blocks in the right holes. Overall I think you should watch this film not because it is funny or a good movie by any means, but because this could actually happen to our society. OK it probably won't happen but it's not impossible. I think that you should rent this and watch it at least once to see what you think about the idea of the film. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: the film is just a little better than the future it describes from Herzlya, Israel 14 July 2008 If you have asked yourselves ever whether a low-level comedy can carry some important messages, then 'Idiocracy' is the working example. A couple of very average American (a soldier and a prostitute is what average means for the makers of this film) get frozen and lost in the idiocy of the 21st century to wake up in the super-idiocy of the 26th century. Earth became a huge garbage dump, mankind a collection of garbage human leading a garbage life. Our 21st century average citizens are the Einsteins of the New Times. And then they must save mankind. This is an original vision, and the more-stupid-then-stupid gags play quite well in the mix. Without too much ambitions the movie extracts a few laughs, although better film making could have probably succeeded much better. It is however part of the charm of such films that the film making should not exceed by far the subject. So yes, important messages can be carried by under-the-belt comedies, but is it worth? Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Not as good as I hoped, but still a hoot from Houston, USA 5 July 2008 It opened with plenty of promise, and the sight gags last all the way through. There's a lot to like about it, and some things to think about after it's over. However, about 2/3 of the way through, I had the thought that most of the premise, as well as the funny and meaningful parts could have been made as skits on "Saturday Night Live". Lots of scenes to laugh out loud at, but other parts dragged. When I was finished, I had no desire to watch it again, or any of the extra parts. I had this feeling that Maya Rudolph's character sounded like a black woman, but didn't look quite right and it confused me the first half-dozen times she said anything. Even with these gripes, it was definitely worth watching. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: I love this movie, but it also scares me . . . from United States 17 February 2008 This movie is hilarious and I am hoping that it eventually becomes a cult hit like Office Space. It is so funny, but the first time I watched it, it scared me and here's why: I am a high school teacher and students are already beginning to dumb themselves down. The concept of language changing to a combination of "hillbilly, valley girl, inner-city slang and various grunts" is a possibility in the future, just read a paper written by an average high schooler or listen to them talk for an hour! Apparently the studios did not do much marketing with the film because the test audiences hated it - of course they did because it is a film that is going to offend the average movie goer. But don't worry, "my first wife was tarded and a lot of tarded people can live way excellent lives. She's a pilot now". Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: The Sleeper awakes again from London, England 10 January 2008 As this film is all about the stupidity and shallowness of a media – obsessed society, I guess it's no coincidence that most comments have missed out on the origins of this thing. It dates, not from Woody Allen's 'Sleeper', but from a novel written in 1898 (and revised in 1910) called 'The Sleeper Awakes' by HG Wells. If you don't believe me, look it up in Wikipedia! Um…okay..but you get the drift. However, the real inspiration for this movie is a short sci-fi novella, 'The Marching Morons', written by CM Kornbluth in 1951. It's all there. IQ or intelligence has shrunken to stupid levels and Kornbluth presents a similar dystopian world (except it's a 50's dystopia, obviously) for the same reasons as this film. There the similarities end. The thing about Mike Judge is you always get the feeling that despite his sometimes biting criticism, he has a genuine affection for middle American 'White Trash' society – not just here but in works such as 'Office Space', and 'King of the Hill'. When I initially heard how Fox had held this film back and then finally released it with no marketing whatsoever I really expected a no-holds barred attack. It doesn't deliver. The initial scenes soon soften and, in fact, it has quite a feel-good ending. If you want to experience the real thing, then check out the Novella. It differs in 3 crucial ways: There is still a tiny minority of intelligent people left in the world who are just about keeping things from total collapse. The 'Sleeper' is not some laid-back, genuinely caring soul (as played by Luke Wilson) but a ruthless and greedy ex ad-man. And, most importantly, the solution to the problem is far, far darker than what is offered here. But don't take my word for it. Read 'The Marching Morons' That is if you read books, of course. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Like, totally way good fun, future dude from Ronn Ives/FUTURES Antiques, Norfolk, VA. 13 November 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** This one is really dumb and really fun. If you are a fan of watching our medias and public degrade themselves into Monster Truck/Jerry Springer/Maury Povich/Home Video spectacles of repulsive mediocrity, this is a story you'll love: A VERY average dude is put into a suspended animation experiment, is supposed to wake up in a year, but things go wrong, and 500 years pass. Okay! The Future!! The Glorious Future!!! Oh… no… not only has there been no progress, everyone and everything is entirely dumbassed down, and he finds himself the Smartest Man on the Planet. If you love and hate what is passing for entertainment now, and want to see one persons vision of how it becomes daily life in the future, this comedy is for you... funny, gross, and like totally way dum, gross, uh like funny, dude. Totally. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Dumb, but enjoyable. from New Zealand 22 July 2007 I found this movie dumb, seriously missing a plot, full of a range of profanity and generally enjoyable. It's not one to watch if you are trying to impress someone with your movie tastes, but sometimes it is good to watch something completely unchallenging. And this fits the bill quite well. I can't ever see it being a cult movie (it would be darn hard to justify ever watching it again) but if you have an adolescent sense of humour, it may be worth a look on the night where you really have nothing better to do. It's much slicker than Office Space (other dumb humour also from Mike Judge) is much more of a one joke movie than some of his other offerings. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Idiocracy was Idiodic from Outside Hollywood 24 May 2007 Idiocracy was the movie I had been waiting to see for months. Then I had a chance to see this film last week. And let me tell you, do not waste your money to see it, it is not worth it. Luke Wilson and Dax Shepard did some acting, and it was not over the top. The idea that a military leader would be caught in a drug and prostitution ring was about the funniest part of this movie. And the way that everyone was so stupid, and ignorant that water wasn't being used. How in the world did they ever make it so far? The reason I have given this film a rating of 6 of 10 is because I have pity on the film makers. And Mike Judge, I thought, was smarter than this. I hope his next project is much better. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Better than expected, and very true to life 31 January 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** This movie was better than I expected. Some people told me that it was "Funny, but parts are unwatchable". I didn't find anything unwatchable. The story is funny all the way through, and there are a number of spoofs on real-world things, taken to the Nth degree, that are frighteningly believable in the context of how the world may become. The main thing that I really liked was that it's corporations that dumb us down - not just our own inherent stupidity or bad genes. I like the jabs taken at Gatorade, Fast Food, the Health Care Industry, Government. It was all so well done, and the best part about a Mike Judge movie is that in the middle of absurdity, he captures very real situations - satire at its best. Maya Rudolph and Luke Wilson both played their characters well. Most of the main characters were great. I am surprised that Luke Wilson takes parts like this when Owen Wilson gets higher profile roles - Luke is definitely the better actor... that's my 2 cents. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: evolution doesn't always award intelligence from United States 26 January 2007 This is one of those movies that your either going to love or hate. I fell into the first category. There's all kinds of real subtle humor and things going on in the background ( Jack in-uh box advertisement) that keep a grin plastered on your face throughout. Unfortunately it seems that Mike Judge may be onto something as a lot of the events shown in the movie seem like they could be happen. Reality TV courtrooms are already in effect. (Judge Judy anyone?) And all the shameless advertisement that pops up seemingly everywhere. My only complaint with the movie is that though it starts out highly satirical, the last 40 minutes kind of take a more slapstick approach and some of the humor falls a little short. But its definitely worth watching. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 1 people found the following review useful: Starts out strong...peters out at the end. from Oakland, CA 8 January 2007 I felt this film started out really strong. It made it's point brilliantly and if you're like me and you hate a lot of what passes as entertainment in our consumer culture and you have a knack for spotting how cultural trends evolve you almost get the impression that Judge is a modern day Nostradamus. He also scores points for casting Luke Wilson in this role. Wilson seems to have found his niche playing relatively straight laced characters who are amusingly dumbfounded by the extraordinary level of absurdity that surrounds their lives (take his character in Old School for example). Initially Idiocracy reminded me a little bit of Woody Allen's "Sleeper". I can also see why some folks may be put off by this film. The cultural divide in America at this time is pretty wide and it really takes a poke at the more obtuse side of said divide. Where I find fault with this film is some of the characters are a little under developed (for instance...what of Beef Supreme? It could have added a lot to make the later half of the film more engaging had we known a little more about his history earlier on in the film). Or President Camacho...it would have been interesting to see a bit more of how this society developed into what it became. Like I said initially, the first half really comes out swinging but pretty much from the middle on, it loses a little steam...and the ending was pretty disappointing. It's almost felt like the studio forced them to put a typical Hollywood style "everything worked out fine and they lived happily ever after" ending. And the post credit "extra" was pretty lame and unnecessary. I think if this film could have delivered solidly from start to finish, it could have easy been one of the most scathing social commentaries since Network. Sadly it falls just short of the mark at the end, however the first half of the film makes this film worth watching. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Great story, but not Mike Judge's idea from San Francisco, CA 28 September 2016 This was fairly well-done as far as movies like this go. And the idea was wonderful....except that it was not an original idea by the Writer/Director Mike Judge. The original story was written by Cyril Kornbluth, titled "The Marching Morons" and published in 1951 by Ballantine Books. In 1959, it was included in an anthology of Kornbluth's work of the same name. Judge followed Kornbluth's story VERY closely for the first half of the movie, but changed the ending to be more upbeat. Kornbluth's story was a dark, doomsday plot. This movie should have been prominently billed as an adaptation of Kornbluth's work. There was only a very small note in the credits which appeared in a version a few years after the movie was released. Judge is tacitly accepting credit for the idea and story line. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Underrated from Oregon 6 March 2015 Great movie. If you don't get it, you might be why this scenario is possible. The movie includes understanding the principals of natural selection. I can envision why a certain segment of society would find this reprehensible. Wow, ten lines of text to review a movie? I don't completely understand the point. Meanwhile, watch the actors expressions closely. There are many sublime aspects to this movie. My review is concluded here, I copied and pasted it again to satisfy the minimum required. Watch this movie! Great movie. If you don't get it, you might be why this scenario is possible. The movie includes understanding the principals of natural selection. I can envision why a certain segment of society would find this reprehensible. Wow, ten lines of text to review a movie? I don't completely understand the point. Meanwhile, watch the actors expressions closely. There are many sublime aspects to this movie. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 3 people found the following review useful: One of the best and "eductional" comedies ever. Author: Josh Mouch 12 December 2010 As a comedy, this movie easily makes my top 3 list. The unique thing about this film is that many of the jokes are visual ones. You need to pay attention to the words on signs and the fact that people are wearing advertisements on their shirts. But the beautiful thing is that it's more than just a comedy. In my summary, I say "educational", which is, admittedly, an extreme word to use, but at very least, this comedy has a valid point to make. The fact that Fox made such stupid decisions with the release of this film is disappointing, but not surprising. They've done the same thing before: like canceling Family Guy twice and canceling Futurama. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 3 people found the following review useful: One of the greatest social commentaries of all time from The Glorious Oregon Coast 27 October 2010 Are you kidding? You want to know how dumb the good ole USA is? Watch this movie. Luke Wilson is at his best with those dry looks at the dummies around him. Surrounded by outrageous fortune, he still makes a reasonable plan to save himself and his fellow time traveler. Maya Rudolph as the love interest, boing oing, oing. My eyes popped out. I never realized what an attractive figure the divine Mz Rudolph has on display, and she's a heck of a comedian. Set 500 years in the future, but you can hear scientists, and news commentators, and politicians sounding just as dumb here in the present. You talk about a black president, well here is the one I want in charge eh! Watch it and learn. There is a great soundtrack, and the scenes look pretty realistic. You don't need Cameron and $ 100,000,000 to make an entertaining and visually stimulating movie. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Hey dude, where's my oligarchy? from United Kingdom 19 May 2010 Not a bad movie to while away some time and you might find yourself tittering here and there. My problem with the film is that it starts with an interesting premise and takes it absolutely nowhere except dumb laughs and a feel good ending. One big flaw is that there's no way such dumb people could still have functioning machines, food, agriculture, cars, etc. and behave the way they do. There's little extrapolation from the present into the future as in most dystopian futures like 1984, Brave New World etc . As social satire it falls short because there's no oligarchy represented here at all as the cause of the dumbing down which would've lent an edge to it all. We are therefore supposed to believe that it's all happening by accident when a much darker comedy reflecting reality could've been developed and Idiocracy would likely have become the cult classic it was supposed to be. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Mildly amusing satire of American culture... 26 June 2009 *** This review may contain spoilers *** ...on a broad, comic-booky level, Mike "Beavis and Butthead" Judge's "Idiocracy" certainly generates laughs despite the absurdity of its premise. Said premise involves a Joe Six-pack (Luke "Bottle Rocket" Wilson) and a vaguely ethnic bimbo (Maya "SNL" Rudolph) being dumped 500 years into the future via experimental hibernation, only to find themselves in a world that has intellectually devolved into a society of imbeciles. Never mind that such a world could never exist (at least as portrayed); "Idiocracy" manages to skewer a wide sampling of contemporary low-brow American culture: slavish narcissism and self-indulgence and the corporate exploitation of same; the cult of personality; LCD entertainment and the denigration of genuine intelligence; homophobia and other bigotries (although interestingly, racism and xenophobia are studiously avoided), a fascination with sex and bodily excretions and various other illustrations of the prototypical American dullard. Almost none of this nonsense is laugh-out-loud funny, but various gags provoke at least a grin or two and a nod of recognition. Most of the targets of derision are too obvious to provoke any real thought; perhaps this was Judge's intent all along, and begs the question of just how stupid he and co-writer, Etan "Tropic Thunder" Cohen, think their probable audience really is, or conversely, just how smugly elitist. Production values are quite good, as is Tim "Suburbia" Suhrstedt's DP work. All in all, "Idiocracy" is a tolerable timeburn, but you won't be any stupider from missing it. Includes cameo appearances by the likes of David "MADtv" Herman, Justin "Jeepers Creepers" Long, and Thomas Haden "Sideways" Church. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 3 people found the following review useful: miserable film 24 October 2008 *** This review may contain spoilers *** the premise of the movie was great i loved the first 15 minuets of it, it was very.... Douglas Adams and actually brought up some kind of funny points stating that only the stupid breed, and that this will eventually lead to the overall iq of the human race to drop to something around that of a trained chimps. OK so good start how ever this movie took a turn in a very wrong direction and itself became stupid, full of jokes that a first grader might find amusing. maybe i just feel this was on account that the start of the film was sort of witty and clever. and yes i understand that this was meant to be a satire but i was just board by most of the film the style of humor was dull and vulgar. i don't know i guess the best i can say is if your intelligent you will be board by this film, if you are stupid you will be insulted by it, and if you are still entertained by watching the wwf and holly wood hulk hogan you will love it but manage to miss the point entirely. watch the first 15 minuets and skip the rest. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Either it's a work of genius, or it's just bad from Denmark 17 April 2007 The most interesting thing about "Idiocracy" is not the premise ("people frozen in a pod and not re-animated until way past their sell-by-date", also known as the Grand Red Dwarf Rip-Off), nor is it the acting (forgettable at best, grating at worst. The only guy I actually liked was the fat dude in President Camacho's cabinet who laughs in an endearingly stupid way.) It's not the special effects (ye gods! Are we back to the Planet of the Apes, non-Wahlberg Edition?) or the conclusion (more predictable than the oldest joke in Captain Predictable's Deja-Vu Revue). No, what keeps me (mildly) interested is that I can't figure out if the movie is intentionally dumb. Because, brother, it's dumb. Hoo-boy, is it dumb. If Jim Carrey hadn't grown up and become mediocre, this would have his name all over it. But at the same time, it's making a statement about how dumb things are becoming. So, there's that question: is the movie intentionally dumb, to a point where it's not at all obvious that it's intentional? Is it trying to guide us into a false sense of arrogant security as we say "man, that movie about the dumbing down of the world sure could have been done more intelligently". Is the director laughing at us behind our backs? Or is he, and the movie, just plain dumb? Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 3 people found the following review useful: A very big disappointment. High hopes, not met. from USA 21 January 2007 I had very high hopes for this film, and knowing it was by Mike Judge made the hopes higher. I do have to say I like the plot, but the complete stupidity and hokeyness of this film totally makes the plot not mean anything. It also had a way too happy ending. I like happy endings but this is unrealistically happy. Almost like a fairy tail happy. The acting is OK, but not the greatest. It isn't that funny but it does have it's moments. It is worth seeing if you have nothing else to watch. I hope this comment helps people. I always look here on IMDb's comments before watching a film. Kris, 12 years old from www.Korova.com 24 September 2006 I just happened to be down in Texas this past week, which gave me a rare chance to see Mike Judge's latest film in its "super-limited release" by 20th Century Fox. Long story made short, the creator of Beavis & Butthead, Office Space and King of the Hill made this in 2004 ... preview audiences pooh-poohed it, some re-shooting was done a year later, and since then Fox has had a terrible time coming up with an ad campaign angle for it. Focus and test groups have responded negatively to various approaches. (Fox has never heard of "word of mouth," and is apparently forgetting how Office Space became a cult hit in second run and home video releases.) So, presumably to satisfy contractual issues, they're releasing it in about 130 theaters, in only 7 cities. Most in Texas (where Judge lives). No advance adverts, no newspaper ads,... nothing. You pretty much have to trip over it by accident, or catch buzz of it on the grapevine. The question is obvious: is it a stinker, or just so outside-the-box that a conventional, studio release can't be done? My answer: a little of both. I won't spoil the plot (you can read it on Amazon or Yahoo or IMDb) for you. Some of the humor is gross, but it suits the story in which reverse natural selection (influenced by corporate and media interests, dumbing down the populace to a double-digit IQ standard) has made mankind a pack of shuffling, scatological morons. Much of Judge's satire is amazingly on target. This IS the guy whose modest workplace comedy became a mythic anthem to office workers everywhere who agreed that "work sucks." The motifs in OFFICE SPACE have spawned dozens of derivative works. The same may not play out here, but the wit and social commentary in IDIOCRACY is just as fresh. The production values are terrific. Though clearly shot on a budget, the film ably depicts a future dystopic America, where various crises and inaction have left the country a garbage strewn slum, a claustrophobic cage of advertising, discarded packaging, thoughtless automated vending machines, and decadence. I was repeatedly wishing I could freeze-frame the images and focus on the background details ... which clearly were as funny as what was in foreground focus. Clearly, the film needs re-editing. It drags in spots. It shifts back to the bookend, mock-documentary narration at odd transitions, sometimes just summarizing a scene that isn't moving fast enough. Yeah, very clunky. The narration gives the whole film a distance from the lead character that saps energy. When you ought to be in his skin, seeing "Uh-merica" in 2505 through his eyes, the narration has you standing in a lab smock, watching this pilgrim's progress through a telescope. Portions of the script come across as a first draft, so fresh and candid that it wasn't subjected to needed rewrites to polish the "jewels in the rough." That Judge crafted a non-stop comedy that is essentially apocalyptic sci-fi tragedy dressed up with wit and gags, is impressive. Animal House crossed with Soylent Green, if that makes sense. Office Space was unassuming, but close analysis of it yields a deep well of mythic parody and commentary on modern life. (Well, *I* think so. ;) ) If Hollywood execs expected more of the same, he failed. If they wanted him to up the ante, it would seem that he DID. He just didn't do it in the direction they wanted. It's not playing in your town unless you live in one of the seven Fox contracted for. Maybe letters or phone calls to local theaters, or letters to Fox directly, could remedy that. But most likely, you'll be seeing this on DVD within 6-8 months. Hopefully the disc will include bonus production info and deleted scenes that provide insight into this slightly flawed masterwork. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 5 people found the following review useful: Idiocracy.. it's got what ..uh. brains need! from United States 9 August 2009 I saw "Idiocracy" with my girlfriend tonight, and it's got sh*t and stuff, oh.. and she's not really my girlfriend, but she sortof hangs out with me...but I seen it already alone.. so anyway, "Idiocracy", is NOT a d*ck and the reason I give it a ten is because of the reason that it is AWESOME and it kicks ass face. So, you see, the writing is like... got things in it that are cool, and the acting people in the movie.. the people playing the movie.. the guy in the movie is really good, and like Costco is this place where you can buy sh*t and stuff and it's in the movie two. Also, the pretty girl is good, but then the president Comacho comes in and tries to save the world, but he needs help from this really really smart dude, but they have no food or anything and have to eat dirt or something. And the scenes are really futuristic like out of that movie about that big black box thing with the monkeys on it. I think the writing even won an Academy Award from FOX News even, because they don't talk all f*ggy and stuff. So, I think that this movie should .. everybody should see this movie, because something about people DOING IT (huh huh) and the world ends up this way and sh*t. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 5 people found the following review useful: Pretty Bad 10 January 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Coming from the creators of Beavis and Butthead, you should realize immediately the level of sophisticated comedy you're in for. That is to say, bottom-rung funnies. This isn't horrible, just something you should prepare yourself for when slipping IDIOCRACY into your DVD player. More of a 1984 for Dummies, Idiocracy has a great premise with poor execution. The premise is that intelligent people (those with an IQ above an amoeba) don't procreate as much as those who live in trailer parks, have questionable dental hygiene, and believe the height of entertainment is watching a monster truck rally. The stars are Luke Wilson as Private Joe Bowers and Maya Rudolph as Rita. Joe is average. So average that the military decides to pull him from his job (doing nothing) and inter him in a cryogenic coffin for one year as a test to see how far they've come with freezing people. They also need a female to round out the study so pull a prostitute named Rita from the streets and put her in a cryo-coffin next to Joe. Supposedly they're to be reawakened in one year. But the leader of the project is arrested and the project forgotten. The building where Joe and Maya lay cryo-sleeping is bulldozed, and their resting places vanish. Fast-forward 1,000 years and we find a massive garbage pile that suddenly falls, causing a landslide. Joe's coffin is ejected from the heap and he quickly wakes up. What he discovers is a society so dumbed-down that he's the smartest person on the planet (he's the only one who knows that watering plants causes them to grow). Maya's coffin reopens, too, and she returns to plying her trade but discovers she no longer needs to spread her legs, as only promising to do so gets her money. Joe is later elevated to the position of Vice-President of the United States (and eventually President), and he has to make the tough decision to stay 1,000 years in the future or to return to his own time via something called "The Time Machine." We later learn, too, that the time machine is simply a Disneyesque ride through a very jumbled and inaccurate world historical account. The premise definitely is intriguing, as some of what is touched upon can be seen in society already. But the poor acting, terrible sets, and weak screenplay make this comedy flick a definite pass. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 5 people found the following review useful: People are getting dumber all the time from United States 13 October 2006 This film is great, and I hope it becomes a sleeper hit as Office Space did. The plot is inane, but this is excused by the fact that it's a film about dumb people. A highly polished an intricate storyline would seem to tear down the premise. As in Office Space, I find myself quoting lines from the film (I usually never do that), and the irony of an over commericalized dumbed down Fox Studio releasing it was not lost on me. (how did the Studio Execs. OK the Fox News scene for instance?) For a 'dumb' film, it sure makes you think, but more importantly, it's just damn funny. I had to wonder in my conspiracy mind whether Fox was purposely pulling back on promotion (no poster or trailer?), to generate buzz and draw to the film. Whether this is true or not, the theater I visited was almost full. I'm sure it will do well on DVD. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 7 people found the following review useful: Very uneven film from Dallas, US 2 September 2006 This film starts with a great idea: in 500 years the entire world will consist of a population that has an extremely low IQ due to the "dumbing down" of society, huge corporations dictate most of the world's policy, and advertising is everywhere. The flow of the movie is just off though. There are definitely some hilarious parts to the movie consisting of some really clever and smart humor. However, sometimes the movie feels as stupid as the society it's trying to lampoon. It's an enjoyable movie, but I think it fell a little short of what could have been done with the subject. Was the above review useful to you? 5 out of 11 people found the following review useful: I understand why they did not release it wide from United States 1 September 2006 Idiocracy has a few very funny moments, but it feels like something that should have been released Straight to Video. I am a huge Mike Judge fan. I own both versions of Office Space. I saw it opening night just as I saw Idiocracy and Beavis and Butthead Do America opening night. I will continue to support Mike Judge. This movie just doesn't work. You can't win them all. It really sucks that this movie did not get a chance. There is no trailer and I only saw one movie poster. It's a shame that Fox just dropped this into the toilet and then flushed it. Idiocracy is funnier than every other piece of crap comedy that was released this summer. That's not saying much. I hate to say this, but wait until it comes out on video. It will most likely be out VERY SOON. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 2 people found the following review useful: movie kicks a** Author: Darko Xylitski 11 September 2013 i gived it 10 but really this movie is eleven. you just can't give eleven on this site. i tried. it has sex love &violence. but not much drugs or rock and roll. then it would be twelve. you can't give 12 either. i didn't try but i don't think so. Seriously though: this is a serious comedy about the stupid inheriting the earth; and it doesn't play for cheap laughs, although there are many fine shades and degrees of slapstick here. It's well acted and directed and the ambiance is nicely envisioned, it's a future world that is believable. And it's just a really funny good humored piece of escapist fiction- a kind of 1984 or Brave New World: for the literarally impaired or just for all of us who need to be reminded of how serious and how laughable the world situation is. You can't help caring for these future idiots and, by extension, for their relatives (progenitors is the big word) in the present. While Idiocracy lays out its rough sketch of a road map for intellectual responsibility in an easy-to-swallow way, it also foreshadows and forewarns of the possible futility of all purely good-hearted efforts, and it does so in a real funny and good-hearted way. I'd vote this film into the Smithsonian. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 2 people found the following review useful: People said it was funny... 4 June 2013 *** This review may contain spoilers *** People said it was funny so I thought it was going to be a comedy. Turns out to be a documentary. OK, humor aside. It's a tongue-in-cheek spoof on evolution, our current society, the political leaders in our highest offices at that time (2006), our education system and a few other cheap shots at corporations, etc. A super average GI Joe in a military suspended animation experiment is sent forward in time ala an obvious homage (plot ripoff) to "Forever Young" (M. Gibson). He is accompanied by a civilian "average girl" Rita whose working girl status is un-revealed to Joe. While they are asleep smart people stop having kids and dumb people have so many, the IQ of the future world slips below average. Joe and Rita wake up 500 years in the future to find themselves the smartest people alive. Joe is forced to accept the responsibility he has always sidestepped in life and is tasked with solving the world's most difficult problems. And Rita's along for the ride. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 2 people found the following review useful: "Evolution doesn't necessarily reward intelligence..." 12 November 2011 *** This review may contain spoilers *** When I was in fifth grade a little over fifty years ago, I read a Weekly Reader article that stated that most great civilizations don't last much more than two hundred years. Obviously that article made quite an impression on me because I still remember it. From the vantage point of the late 1950's this would have seemed impossible for the United States, but as we cruise well past the two hundred year mark, it almost seems inevitable now doesn't it? Believe it or not, I looked this film up because Rush Limbaugh recommended it the other day on his EIB Network radio show. I can't believe he actually watched it, but then again, benefit of the doubt and all that. It could be he was inspired by the way the picture satirizes the way the government operates today, what with a House of Representin that's about as effective as Congress these days. Well left to my own devices, this isn't the type of picture I would generally pick up, given the premise and the cast. A single viewing was enough to convince me that I've hit my quota of dumb pictures for the year, and even once is too much with this one. Indeed, human evolution may be at a turning point, and this picture only reinforces that it's direction is down hill on a slippery slope. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 2 people found the following review useful: The future's not bright from London, England 17 May 2009 This film tends to polarize people. Personally I didn't quite either love it or hate it but came close to both. Reasons to watch it: It's very funny in places. You'll be remembering the best jokes and chuckling for ages afterwards. It's a genuinely hard-hitting satire of our era, perhaps the only real biting satire I've seen on screen for a long time. People may well be referring to the best bits for ages, and if you haven't seen it you may feel left out. If you like to think about social problems rather than escaping them - I don't knock either attitude - then you need to think about some of the points raised here, assuming you haven't already. It's by Mike Judge, who made King of the Hill and the excellent Office Space, and like the latter it unfairly didn't get a proper release even in the US. Reasons to avoid it: It's stupid. Well, it's obviously more intelligent than the average Hollywood stupidity, but it's still pretty stupid at times. Some of the plot points are fairly stupid and feel arbitrary, and many of the jokes are stupid and crass. If you're stupid and crass in the cause of satirizing stupid and crass people, aren't you still stupid and crass? Are we laughing at them or laughing like them? This was a problem I had with Beavis and Butthead, and at least one of the main characters - really, the whole society depicted - is like a grown-up, or at least aged, version of one of them. The inhabitants of the idiocracy are genuinely repulsive and vile at times, and in a couple of places I found myself looking away and blocking my ears squeamishly or dearly wishing I just had. The voice-over device, although necessary some of the time, is a little overused and you become annoyed to be told things rather than shown. Furthermore aspects of the ending are an appalling cop-out. 'I've decided I like these people after all.' For God's sake why? They are dreadful. If I say the film's like a coil of barbed wire with a candy-floss coating, that cuts both ways. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 2 people found the following review useful: A very not sharpen up movie from Romania 17 August 2008 The movie itself has a aura of boredom on him from the start, and the actors was not the best choice. So it begins with a very straight storyline you could guess in a second what will happen all the movie from the start. It really try to pull out a few laughs but despite the efforts he doesn't do a good job at all. The characters are stupid, the idea could be fun but not in that way, the story is told with no turns and twists or something you would say "this is cool". It ends in a happy end style never less a comedy should end that way to keep the good mood. Idiocracy is about a new world dominated all by idiots worse then in the ice age, a ironic future world who wants to point a little from our real problems. My recommendation is you need to be real bored to watch this is not repulsive but is not much fun also. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 2 people found the following review useful: superficial, lacking expertise, poorly made and totally compromised a "movie" 6 February 2007 this "movie" is so low in quality and shallow... there was a story with three little pigs, each one building a house for himself, one pig built his house of hay, second one made it out of sticks, and the last one made it with bricks; then a wolf tested the quality of their houses haha... well, this movie is like the house made of hay. the beginning of the movie is quite funny, we are presented the premises - people with high IQ fail to reproduce, while people with lower IQ multiply in great numbers "for generations and few seemed to notice", and a perfect mediocre army librarian was about to "unknowingly change the course of human history" by participating as a guinea pig in an army experiment with "human hibernation"... and that is all. the rest of the movie is a mess. it starts crumbling as soon as the librarian is put into the "hibernation pod" and the military base is demolished as a result of a "massive scandal". whoever made this "Idiocracy" lacks expertise in making movies. as an example of how poorly constructed this movie is, we are told that 500 years from now people in US will be very stupid, yet they still drive cars, have batteries and electricity and television and stuff; how can stupid people manufacture cars or produce electricity and store it into batteries, we are not given any clue. ironically, this "Idiocracy" movie is trying to sell itself by pointing the finger at what its creators consider to be superficiality and lack of quality of other media products and things and stuff. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 2 people found the following review useful: Mike Judge Finally Strikes Out from United States 27 January 2007 I WANTED to like this movie, but fell victim to the hype about no hype, and so I bought a NEW copy and found it to be easily the worst movie of the new century. The premise is fine, but the execution is terrible. It could have been a "Blade Runner" parody, but, instead, if could have been written by one of the cretins who populate the story's society. It's always good to see Luke (and Owen) Wilson's brother Andrew, who has a small role near the end, and it was good to see Robert Musgrave (like Andrew, Owen and Luke Wilson), a star from one of the great comedy films of the last century, "Bottle Rocket". Other than the kudos, there were more, but the actors mercifully opted for no credit, this was a bad, bad, bad movie. Surely fans of "Jackass" and "Jackass 2" would have found this film DUMB AND DUMBER. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 2 people found the following review useful: An all too rare example of a sci-fi themed movie from UK 30 December 2006 Part Sleeper, part Logan's Run and part Futurama, Idiocracy is an example of the rarest big screen (yeah, I know Fox never allowed that in the end) genre. Usually Hollywood gives us mock sci-fi, like The Island, Deja Vu, and Children of Men, where a very different kind of film steals the clothes of science fiction to disguise its own inner worthlessness. Comic book hero films I consider their own genre. Idiocracy is also a very unsubtle satire that seeks to attack those that currently rule the USA without ever mentioning them by name. Indeed, Mike Judge bends over backwards to ensure that a simple-minded analysis of his film reveals it to be harmless to any present day entity, but Judge's enemies within Murdoch's empire are anything but stupid, and took offensive at the real message Judge embedded within his writing. Recognising the paradox of needing the approval of the very audience his film so ruthlessly lampoons, Judge makes the ultimate message of Idiocracy big-hearted and affectionate, an act of commercial cowardice that he probably regrets, in the light of Fox's actions. Anyway, Idiocracy is a harmless and surprisingly entertaining science fiction romp, albeit one that steals every single one of its ideas and jokes from far more skilled creative talents, especially the people behind The Simpsons and Futurama. It is obvious that a lot of love went into this film, but equally obvious (as the constant dodgy, but 'flavour-giving' narration proves- always an indication of problems in the story-telling) that the director never found a structure that met with common approval during the production process. Compensating for failures in originality and purpose are many, many wonderful vistas showing the ruination of urban US life 500 years into the future. The special effects may not have a 'Star Wars' budget, but they are used with a grand imagination that easily surpasses the written script, and reminded me of drawings from the golden age of Mad Magazine. The performers of Idiocracy are hardly a reason to watch the movie, but don't spoil it either. The astonishingly bland and untalented Luke Wilson (how does this guy get work- at least his even less talented brother has the looks) is cast in a role that attempts to make a virtue of his 'limitations'. Most of the rest of the cast are merely required to look stupid, and most of them do, albeit rarely in an entertaining way. Idiocracy is just one of those films that works as a whole, being, as a sum of its parts, significantly better than any of those parts taken individually. This, of course, is the very description of Mike Judge's successes. Dissected and analysed, his body of work rapidly falls to bits, but art is about the effectiveness of the whole, not the parts. If you like science fiction, if you like Futurama, if you can forgive a writer that has to steal almost everything from his 'betters', and if you are more interested in the creativity of special effects rather than their CGI 'perfection', you may well enjoy this movie. There is also the strong possibility that you will like Idiocracy if you are one of those people Judge is mocking, without realising that you fall into that category, but then again, one presumes that without this type of appeal, Fox would never have greenlit Idiocracy in the first place. Oh, and the film as a comedy? Well, again, really in the vein of classic 'Mad Magazine', and that means that many won't really find it funny at all, but those that do will most likely find it extremely funny. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 4 people found the following review useful: An interesting piece of satire, a weak Comedy from USA 25 May 2016 Idiocracy is the type of film that you tell yourself is going to be great, where you get hyped, and it begins great, too... but, as you watch the movie, you slowly begin to realize that the endless potential that made you come by the film in the first place is half- baked, executed in a sadly mediocre state. Let me start off by saying that as a person, I'm not really mature. I still make remarks that others would consider to be childish and outright stupid. However, I know a good Comedy when I see one, and this is clearly not it. I think the issue with this film is simple: it's a confused mess of a Comedy, with good satire backing it up in a sort of way. I feel sad to say that I barely laughed (let alone giggled) throughout this film. I got most of the jokes, but almost none of them were gut-busters, or even made me laugh. I think the saddest part of this film is that there weren't many jokes to begin with. Most of the humor is visual, but allot of it is very cheap. That said, as I mentioned above, this film is a great satire. It constantly pokes fun at such things as commercialism and the rising number of people doing dumb things, and really puts you in a world where everything has gone awry. It may not be the smartest film to ever exist, but it sure gets it's point across without any subtly. In conclusion, I don't hate Mike Judge's Idiocracy, but it could have had more laughs packed in. If you're looking for a gut-buster of a comedy, then this isn't really it... but, if you are looking for interesting and hard-hitting satire, then give this a go. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Blunt-force Humor from Dallas, Texas 23 April 2016 A wonky space device hurls a generic American Joe and Jane five hundred years into the future. They wake up in an America that is unrecognizable in its cultural trashiness and arrested development. It's an interesting concept that could have been a terrific satire on our current culture. Unfortunately, the underlying concept is diluted by too much emphasis on hyper action borrowed from TV wrestling and rapperism. There are some funny moments. Those mini-cars are humorously ugly. I like the dialogue in the Costco segment. The Fox news anchors are a hoot, except the woman needs to be a blonde, not a brunette. Also good is the brief segment explaining that water had been deemed a threat to corporate profits; hence the use of a sports drink to water plants. The dialogue and visuals in these segments render a commentary that is prescient. But the overall trend of the film is not clever dialogue but rather fast action and irritating noise. The rapper President is not funny; he's annoying. The car to car rehabilitation sequence in the second half is boring and unimaginative. And with a screen shot averaging just 1.9 seconds, much of the futuristic visuals whiz by without notice. Further, the nondescript background music is overbearing and reminds me of what I would hear in some stupid Tom Cruise "action" movie. And finally, too much of the dialogue is lowbrow and crude gutter talk, as the film tries to appeal to a juvenile demographic. I would have preferred a slower paced plot with emphasis on clever, organic dialogue, not the labored adolescent humor that dominates much of the film. I predict this film will age badly, as cultural values and technology change. In "Idiocracy", be prepared for a typical Hollywood action movie with in-your-face, blunt-force "humor", set in some distant future. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 4 people found the following review useful: A Satire That Doesn't Quite Work 12 February 2013 *** This review may contain spoilers *** One of my late father's favorite stories was C. M. Kornbluth's 1951 novella "The Marching Morons", about a man who is accidentally put into suspended animation and is brought out 500 years later, to find a messy Earth heavily overrun by moronic humans while a comparatively small group of human geniuses is busy trying to hold society together. The reason things got that way because the dumber people were having most of the babies while the smart ones were having fewer. The same idea is brought up here, with an Army private and a prostitute being used for an experiment where they are purposely put into suspended animation. But in this case, the experiment goes awry and they end up waking 500 years into the future, being accidentally revived by a garbage tsunami. The world is futuristic but decaying and full of huge amounts of garbage, and there are no human geniuses, only highly advanced technology and computer programs that the humans are barely able to use. Corporations are now very powerful-but it matters little because the whole world is so messy anyway, with humans unable to grow their own food. The future humans are vacuous and naive and speak very slowly, and the sudden presence of the private and the prostitute knocks them for a loop-especially when they are smarter than everyone else in the world. There is mention of a "time machine"...but how do they get back to it to return to their own time? And perhaps they might even be able to solve the mess humanity is currently in? The satire is too broad to have a real impact. The stupid people enjoy very lowbrow entertainment and consume unhealthy food, and assume plants need Gatorade and not water because water is used for toilets and plants need minerals-which is why the plants aren't growing. Why didn't this film get promoted? Quite probably because of the movie's implication that people who enjoy lowbrow entertainment and aren't highly educated are inherently stupid. The truth of course is that some highly educated people really do like lowbrow entertainment, and even geniuses can be stupid and imperceptive. Just ask Robert MacNamara, the boy wonder...and inventor of the Ford Edsel, a high-tech car that proved to be an expensive design failure. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Awful and smart at the same time, maybe awfully smart. BUT: I hated it. 17 November 2011 *** This review may contain spoilers *** The storyline promised a film that would make a point and show how far the dumbing of America can become if one uses one's imagination. I believe America is getting dumber and dumber for all the reasons this movie completely fails to address. So what was left to show in this motion picture if how society has been brought to such a level of stupidity and total lack of substance and intellect? What was left is simply to show a bunch of dumb people or as characters in the movie would say (about the only way they can express things), "dumb mother f*ckers". It is as excruciating to see dumb mother f*ckers on screen as it is in real life. Oh yes, we don't have to wait 500 years to see and hear dumb mother f*ckers; watching the news and especially any reporting about the Republican leadership race and rallies in the 2011/2012 campaign, we see one dumb mother f*cker after another. I digress. The numerous reviews about this movie and the wide ranging views and comments are so diverse, some making quite good observations and others not so much, I felt compelled to write my 2 cents worth. I am ashamed to admit I watched this crap, but as I wrote a few times before in other reviews, that's what I do; I watch anything almost, in hopes of finding some gems. This is not a gem; I would normally write an antonym for gem in this instance, but this movie so turned me off that no antonym (and by the way there is no such thing as an actual antonym for gem) would not be strong enough to express how much I hated it. For the few remedial minds that thought and wrote the movie was brilliant, I'm sure you've must have been thinking about the state of society as it's depicted; reading the storyline, one might see a good idea, but making the movie was not and watching it can only dumb you down. The movie Dumb and Dumber is cerebral and a 'Chef d'Oeuvre' compared to 'Idiocracy'. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Idiocracy is hilarious. 7 August 2009 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Idiocracy is a hilarious film from Director Mike Judge. Judge did Office Space back in 1999, and his newest or recent film doesn't disappoint. It's a got a hilarious cast including Luke Wilson, Maya Rudolph, Dax Shepard, and Terry Crews. Though the film is crude, it's awesome. Also, it's really F*ucking funny. I won't say to much about it but I will say this. It's a great comedy and I think you should see it. I'll admit it is sometimes very immature, but that's Mike Judge for you. I like Luke Wilson's character and Maya Rudolph's. In fact, I prefer Luke Wilson over Owen Wilson. At least Luke Wilson doesn't have the annoying voice over the dented nose. Just note, Idiocracy was probably the funniest film of 2006. Though we had Clerks II and Borat, Idiocracy wins overall. The Plot: A moronic soldier and a prostitute are meant to sleep in a capsule for a year. But something goes wrong and they sleep for 500 years.When they both wake up, they realize the world has gone retarded and there is a huge prostitution thing going on. It also turns out that the idiot soldier is the smartest person on the planet. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Very disappointing 23 April 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I am taking the time to comment on this because of how bad it is. I would hate for others who like Mike Judge previous work and/or Futurama to expect something special. Office Space is on my top 10 movies of all-time. The movie didn't a magnificent job of being a parody of the corporate world. Office Space is not only funny but brings to light how dehumanizing a corporation can be to individuals. I also loved Futurama and this movie has a similar premise. How could a Mike Judge Comedy making fun of stupid people with a similar theme to Futurama be bad? It is painfully bad. There are a couple of laughs about stupid people in general but there was not even enough funny or interesting movie to make this movie average. The movie likes discussing IQs but unfortunately this movie has an IQ of a cretin. If you are a fan of Mike Judge and can get this as a rental for 1 buck, it might be worth your time just to see how bad the movie is and try to figure out where it went wrong. If you are not a fan of Mike Judge then avoid this completely. I am sure Mike Judge will come up with a better outing next time. He is a talented writer and producer but every in Hollywood has a bad movie. Dean from United States 4 February 2007 This is a comedy that got a few good laughs out of me, and a couple great ones as well. It was certainly not the best movie, and not the worst. It doesn't break any new ground by any means, but it does not try to either. It is a comedy that does not take itself too seriously, and uses it's ridiculous/silly premise to help set up the off-the-wall jokes and situations that are funny. I enjoyed watching it once, but would not ever consider watching it again. We got it on a two-for-one rental, and it was worth it for that price; if it had cost $4 or so instead, my woman and I would both have felt a bit cheated I think. If you've got a good sense of humor, aren't too critical, and can find a laugh in just about anything, it's probably worth a watch. I'd suggest watching the top 100 comedy films first however, if you can find such a list. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Poignant Film About Contemporary Times from Canada 10 January 2007 I have never actually enjoyed a Mike Judge film before, since they seemed too dumbed-down for my taste, seeing as I am an avid reader of Hunter S. Thompson and Kurt Vonnegut. I'm also a reader of political memoirs, and Judge's filmography left me wanting, waiting for a miracle. For me, the red herring was Office Space. It was OK, but not worthy of my time as a screenwriter and film buff. I needed more, and I got just that with this new film. The poignancy came with the premise of dumbing-down America. This is a current event, a contemporary problem, which has plagued the US for a decades now. It has gotten to the point where semi-intelligent people have contemplated suicide, in response to the degeneration of their neighborhoods and communities who drool over mindless television. To depose a President of the USA now is not dissimilar to committing mass treason, of which you would be excommunicated from your city, or worse, injected with lethal poison. How does freedom of speech and of the mind reign in a society so rigid in its values, made concrete by the marketeers of media at large? It doesn't, and it depresses the hell out of a lot of free loving Americans. That's why this film is so current, because it challenges your intellect to the point where it subconsciously says to you, "I'm not as dumb as these people, and I'm offended that you'd make my country of the future this way Mike Judge, but really, why am I angry? Fox News acts just like these people in the movie, only a little smarter. If we follow these Fox News people, and those idiots I see on reality TV everyday, maybe we will end up like these retards. F*** it, it's only books for me from now on." That's why this film is so engaging, because it forces you to ask these very serious questions in your own mind, while making you laugh your ass off. It seems clear to me that Mike Judge has spent at least the better part of a year developing this script, and it shows, for every scene is funny in its "stands-on-its-own" right. You need to watch this film, for as a screenwriter, and a person who has watched the top 250 IMDb titles, it's the second best of 2006, next to Copying Beethoven written by Stephen J. Rivele and Christopher Wilkinson. Watch it, it's by far the funniest, most relevant film of 2006. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 4 people found the following review useful: a good idea... poorly executed from United States 9 January 2007 While the concept of Idiocracy is somewhat alluring, the movie falls short on so many levels. After seeing it in the theater I veritably became dumber. The acting is flagrant, the jokes foul, and the conclusion foreseeable. The movie makes an attempt at satire, but gets lost in the overall stupidity of its characters. The movie has none of the subtle humor that worked so fittingly in office space. Instead it relies on toilet humor that should have been plunged out of the script. Granted the movie is supposed to be about stupid people, but one can only handle so much. Most of the movie is the same thing over and over with nothing fresh leading towards a conclusion. Not even worth watching. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 4 people found the following review useful: If Office Space was Kane is this Ambersons? from United States 5 November 2006 Idiocracy screened in Minneapolis last night at midnight. One show only, and the only press about the showing was fairly negative reprints of other towns reviews. Still, well over a hundred people showed up and seemed to throughly enjoy the movie. I have to say this is not Mike Judge's best work but it is clearly visionary and remarkably interesting to watch. The jokes that are built into the scenery stack up and multiply as the film goes on. Wilson's performance was quite good and I have to say this is the first time I liked Maya Rudolph. Some of the plot turns in the third act seem kind of canned, but less so than 80 percent of current Hollywood comedy. It is easy to understand why Fox is killing this film softly. This is one of the most subversive movies to be released in recent years. I won't repeat a lot of the jokes you have read about regarding what has happened to Starbucks, Fudruckers and FoxNews, but they can't be happy. For me Judge's damnation is pointed towards what happens when branding and advertising become too close to the identity of the individual citizen (as opposed to consumer). In the end the film just seems over finished. It looked like lawyers were in the editing booth and dictating the voice over narration. Someday in the future we might get to see a director's cut, but I wouldn't hold my breath. We can celebrate the announcement that Judge will no longer make movies where he doesn't have final cut. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 6 people found the following review useful: Idiocracy, a Guyish Good Time. from United States 1 September 2006 Now, you can't go into seeing Mike Judge's 'Idiocracy' expecting to see the witty, subtle comedy stylings of 'Office Space'. Idiocracy is a completely different style. This movie's target audience are Maxim magazine reading, beer drinking, Spike TV watching, sit on your couch on the weekends, swearing, sweaty, laugh at someone getting hit in the balls Guys; and if you fit the profile, you will have a gut-wrenching good time. The movie follows Joe Bowers (Luke Wilson) as he gets placed into a military experiment to be frozen for 1 year, but something goes awry and he is awoken in the year 2505. The movie includes many Mike Judge favorites such as David Herman (Office Space) and Steven Root (Office Space, King of the Hill) as well as many other notable actors, such as Maya Rudolph (Saturday Night Live), Dax Shepard (Punk'd), and many others. This movie is Vulgar, Offensive, and a great satire on today's popular culture. All in all, 'Idiocracy' is a just Guy's movie, its as simple as that. Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 10 people found the following review useful: Disappointing... from United States 3 September 2006 Mike Judge is one of the funniest guys out there, and I'd been looking forward to seeing Idiocracy for months until I saw it a couple days ago. Supposedly, Fox hated it so much that they didn't even make a trailer for it and only released it in 130 screens and, sadly, I understand why. The premise of the movie is hilarious, but its execution leaves one shaking their head after the movie is over. In a way, it's like a reversal of the basic foundation of Beavis and Butthead, where an average guy is surrounded by idiots rather than the other way around. That's the main problem since the people that surround Luke Wilson are TOO stupid, resulting in a myriad of characters who are simply annoying and make you roll your eyes. The story isn't told very well, there's too much narration and the good jokes in the movie are few and far inbetween. It has none of the wit or vitality of Office Space and is a distant second compared to the stupidly-hilarious Beavis and Butthead. It's essentially a one-joke movie based on a lame joke, though there are a few good gags that made me laugh pretty hard. In the end though, I was disappointed. Office Space is much better, as is everything else Mike Judge has made. Was the above review useful to you? 6 out of 14 people found the following review useful: Idiocracy: Completely Misjudged from Ireland 24 April 2011 Rather a fan of Office Space, and at the constant brunt of an insistent friend's urges to make my way to this, I took the opportunity to watch Idiocracy on television when it appeared, despite a vague memory of being unimpressed at catching the start when I had seen it a number of years before. Testing out new cryogenic technology, the U.S. military enlists Corporal Joe Bauers and private citizen Rita to go into a year long hibernation. Following the abandonment of the facility containing the pair, they are forgotten and are only awoken after 500 years. With the global population having become unanimously stupid, Joe now boasts the world's highest IQ, and is turned to to fix the problems of the dystopian society. A social satire on the idiocy of modern American (primarily, though not exclusively) capitalist society from Mike Judge? What could go wrong? Well, the answer would appear to be just about everything, I'm sorry to say. For a film which purports to criticise the loss of intelligence in our current commercialist paradigm, Idiocracy is itself wholly stupid, idiotic, unintelligent, and downright dumb. Now, let's get a few things straight before we continue. I do realise that to effectively comment upon something, it is at times necessary to yourself resort to employing it. Would anyone dispute that This is Spinal Tap, despite iconically parodying the silliness of heavy metal culture, gave rise to a number of irony-free silly heavy metal concert tours from a very real and very silly heavy metal band? Certainly not. There is nothing wrong with becoming the subject of your discussion, indeed doing so is often necessary: would Unforgiven have functioned as well as a revisionist commentary upon the glamourlessness of violence in the western genre without portraying the violence of the western genre? An entirely rhetorical question. With Idiocracy, however, the situation is different. Judge employs idiotic characters and dialogue as well as lowest-common-denominator humour, but to what end? To show us the direction toward which our society is fast headed? Well yes, the character of Frito conveys this well, as do some of the circumstances in which Joe finds himself. But when we are shown a fast food chain eventually renamed to "buttf*ckers" (the asterisk is my addition), we are invited to laugh at it. Excuse me? Aren't we here to address the issue of stupidity in modern culture by examining an accentuated version thereof in a futuristic context? And yet the funniest thing the film— presumably, as one critical of stupidity, intended itself to be intelligent—can think to do is to have us laugh at how funny cheap profanity is. I just don't get it... The humour is lewd and crude, and relies heavily on profanity, sexual jokes, and exactly the things which characterise the dumbness of the society I assumed it to want to critique. Maybe it doesn't want to; maybe it really just wishes to provide cheap and stupid laughs. Either way, it fails to function entirely, neither amusing not satirising, just bemusing in its intentions. Apparently intended as a scathing criticism of society's stupidity, Idiocracy is itself exactly what it claims to dislike about our modern world. Completely misjudged, appallingly and bizarrely stupid, and with a hideously uninteresting narrative to boot, it makes the popular "comedy" of Apatow and his ilk look genius, and by golly gum is that saying something. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Mediocre is worse than bad....when there was so much potential from United Kingdom 12 January 2013 What a washout!! A great concept and not a terrible movie........but not a good movie either unfortunately. The main point of the movies carries throughout and any whingers about it's science fiction credentials and believability are missing the point spectacularly...however this film just isn't funny enough. It's mildly amusing but for a film with so much potential, well that is a tragedy. This movie feels like something that's gone through a first and possibly a second draft but should have been thrown back to the writer for more work or passed on to someone else for a treatment. Middle rung. Average. Watch it when you've got nothing better to do. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Not too bad, but not that good, either. from United States 12 January 2009 I was hoping that this movie was a hidden gem by a comedic genius that was unfairly shoved off to the side by talentless studio hacks, but this time it looks like the studio was right. The movie is mostly a mess. There are a few funny parts, especially the opening sequences, but not too much after that. On the surface the idea of an average guy being deemed a genius sounded fun. A sort of futuristic Being There. And Judge's attacks on consumerism gave him lots of targets to shoot at. But it's almost as if Judge had too much on his plate. Perhaps if he narrowed his vision he could have focused on specific items. And in this post 9/11 world, I don't think a world of idiots would be as benign as it is portrayed in this movie. I pin most of the failure on Judge as the acting was sound. Everybody did a good job with their parts and you didn't feel that a change of personnel would make the material better. Luke Wilson is good. His role as a fish out of water is believable. Maya Rudolph is also good. Hopefully her association with this turkey doesn't limit her chances in the future. Besides acting great, she looks great. She's the reason I kept watching. And props to the guy who played Michael Bolton in Office Space as he does a great job here. You have to see this if you're a Mike Judge fan. But,if not,skip it. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 3 people found the following review useful: Not that funny... from United States 13 February 2007 OK, this movie was just OK. I liked the main theme of humanity falling down into absolute stupidity but to actually make it into a B-comedy didn't seem to work at all. There are a lot of unanswered questions and clues like how are they even able to make the gatorade drink if they don't even know how to grow crops. How the hell are they still able to build cars and big-ass trucks if they don't even know how to build a building(they're all crooked in the movie) or highways, etc. They don't even know how to get rid of the garbage and they're handling money. Now for the funny parts, i mean really only a really stupid person would laugh at another person's stupidity. Have fun, retards. from Romania 10 February 2007 i don't know what to call this movie....except not worth you'r time!!!!! this movie is just the result of an director's imagination..of the future of mankind...a bad version of it! i mean come on....we cant be that stupid in the future... Although i was very excited to see this movie when i heard about it...it was an awful deception...the acting i don't know what to say...was good for the movie...the actors did their job but nothing surprising..to conclude ..i hope mankind wont reach the level of the movie....and i think this is only possible if we study and do something in our life! Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 5 people found the following review useful: This would have been a great 5 minute sketch from Glen Cove, New York 3 September 2007 Mike Judge's barely escaped film is a disappointment. The most average guy in the army is frozen along with a hooker named Rita, supposedly for a year. When a scandal closes the base they are hidden in, they are forgotten about and only wake up five hundred years later when they are freed by the great Garbage Avalanche. With Intelligence in the toilet Bob and Rita now find themselves the smartest people in the world. Satire, ah yes I remember what that is. This is satire, clearly it is with it lampooning everyone and everything about American society. I wish it was more clever and more funny than it is. Its a scatter-shot collection of stupid people jokes that look like it was done as a foul mouthed TV movie. Its done on the cheap and feels it. It reminded me of cheap-o 1970's TV spoof comedies, that were more often than not just okay, and which thrived on the big screen in the wake of SNL because you could show breasts and say dirty words. This is an okay SNL sketch with dirty words stretched to 85 minutes.The pieces work-in theory if nothing else, but the fact that the plot has to run the length of a feature makes it all collapse. Worse Judge has picked fifteen too many easy targets so that you'll know the punchlines way before they happen. I'm not saying its bad, yea well in a way I am, but its not that bad, and worth a look, but little else. Maybe Fox was right in sitting on the film, certainly its not the masterpiece (major or minor) people are claiming because of the controversy. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 5 people found the following review useful: Not much... Still nice.... from Latvia 29 December 2006 I read other users comments before watching this movie and considered the raitings so when I started watching it I expected some really neat and maybe even dramatic movie, although it turned up to be nothing more then just an average comedy. Not really funny, not really dramatic and didn't include too much of Sci-Fi either. Futuristic world looks based on some old movies (like if there anything new to come up with) like Mad Max, Waterworld etc... Though has some new ideas and aspects. I would definitely say that the time I spent watching the movie was well spent but in a meantime if you have something else to watch, go on, you're most likely are going to win. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 5 people found the following review useful: imdbjeff from Toronto is a tosser from United Kingdom 29 December 2006 Just how stupid does this movie have to be for people to get the point?, 3 September 2006 Author: imdbjeff from Toronto, Ontario Let me start by saying that if you're expecting subtle humour, you're in the wrong theatre. It's low-brow and heavy-hitting. But he's not out to tickle your funny bone. He's got the sledgehammer out and he's drawn a bead on the side of your head. But fear not. As movies go, this is a fairly gentle education. Oh, also, heavy on the swearing, but once again, Mike Judge, not Fred Rogers. Was this movie called 'intelliocracy'? F*** no. The gem, the essence that is Mike Judge is that he has the ability to make people laugh at themselves. Beavis and Butthead was most popular with teen-aged boys, the very people at which it incessantly poked fun. ----------------------------------------------- The comment above was more confusing than the film and the one who left it should go suck their mothers nipples as they still write like a baby anyway. THE movies is great, the acting is great and the presentation is great so what more do you need.......... I don't really care if this is published as I just wanted to slag of the idiot above......... Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 7 people found the following review useful: Unfortunately, the studio only made it worse... from Southern Hemisphere 14 June 2007 On the surface, Idiocracy had all the right ingredients for a comedy that would be remembered by audience members who have commonality with its protagonist long after its release. Sort of like a Repo Man for the twenty-first century, to use a comparison. Unfortunately, however, the studio found reactions from test audiences to be underwhelming, and made drastic alterations in the hope of increasing its mass appeal. The problem is that instead of improving the film, this interference served to exacerbate the flaws that were already in the story. One clue that self-proclaimed intelligent viewers seem to miss is that the premise of the film is based in some very faulty assumptions regarding the nature of intelligence and intellectual development. For Mike Judge's story idea to work, Pauline and Hermann Einstein would have to have been extraordinary geniuses who were capable of turning the world on its head with new ideas regarding the laws that govern our universe. The same would need to be true of the Teslas, the Newtons... you get the idea. So when I say that Pauline and Hermann were just an average, ordinary couple who happened to raise a high-functioning autistic child who developed an intense, pervasive interest in theoretical physics, the fundamental flaw in Judge's idea is exposed. During the setup of Judge's future world, several assumptions are made about divisions in the human race for a start. IQs in Judge's world are either above the range we consider normal (above 120 for those who do not already know), or below that range (below 90). No middle ground exists in Judge's world, and this is unfortunate because the middle ground is exactly where the majority of interesting stories occur. Additionally, Judge makes the assumption that two parents of lower intelligence will necessarily produce a child of lower intelligence, or that a child of lower intelligence will not grow up to want a better life than the trailer trash that Judge seems to believe constitutes the entirety of the populace whose IQ can be measured in two digits. It should therefore come as no surprise that the only watchable parts of Idiocracy are those that take place in the year 2005. The world of 2005, although only seen through what a visualist might call a keyhole, shows so many more shades of grey than the imagined world of 2505 does in the entire remainder of the film. Not helping matters is how the world of 2505 begs so many questions about how the place is kept running, if not optimally then sufficiently for people to do business. I never thought I would be saying something positive about a Stanley Kubrick film, but in Dr. Strangelove, we are shown in rather horrifying terms how the world is the way it is because the best and brightest are in charge. The key element in how intelligence or simple aptitude (which are not the same thing) keeps our world going is not the actions of those at the top of the curve, but the gulf between them and the average citizen. As is said so brilliantly in Caddyshack, the world needs ditch-diggers, too. But Judge seems unable to guess what would happen without the scientists. Historians will tell you that the best way to predict what happens in a future situation is to look at things that have happened in the past. A society that becomes complacent and stagnant will eventually fall into ruin and be erased by a more optimal or ideally-positioned society. To put it less baldly, the world has a way of righting itself when things get too out of balance. Historians familiar with the Spain that Christopher Columbus left behind on the fateful trip that ended in the Americas will know that humanity is a doomed species without medical care and research. In a world with garbage piles so huge as to provoke avalanches, and doctors who cannot even form a coherent sentence in their native language, mankind is literally target practice for every virus known or unknown. That the human race could have survived like this for more than fifty years without getting a rude wake-up call is perplexing even to those who have not memorised the contents of Paradise Lost. And this is the big problem for Idiocracy. In attempting to create a story about the rule of the stupid, Mike Judge finds himself resorting to exaggeration to an extent that turns his commentary into an insult to the intelligence of the audience. The word satire is absent from many descriptions of Idiocracy, and with good reason. A satire usually has something to say about its subject, and a good satire says it without being terribly obvious. Idiocracy throws so many obvious jokes at the screen in an attempt to get the audience to laugh by rote that it just leaves the intelligent viewer dumbfounded. The hypocrisy inherent in dumbing down a comedy about dumbing down for mass consumption, for mass consumption, might strike people as ironic. Unfortunately, it would take a radically different edit of Idiocracy to convince me that the man who created it was not, to use George Clooney's classic line from a much better comedy, dumber than a bag of hammers. The material is literally that idiotic. Hence, I gave Idiocracy a two out of ten. As a human being who has higher aspiration and divergent thought hardwired into his brain, I find it insulting. That should tell you everything you need to know about how well it accomplished its storytelling goals. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 7 people found the following review useful: The dumbest thing was the movie itself from Australia 4 March 2007 Having read some of the glowing reviews on this very website, I was looking forward to seeing this movie. The premise sounded somewhat amusing; the idea that mankind will become more stupid instead of the opposite. Sure, it's a satire. Sure, it's a jab at the dumbed-down aspects of our society. But isn't a satire supposed to be funny? The movie was about as engaging as a wet sponge, and it was a constant battle as to what was more stupid - the civilisation depicted in this terrible film, or the film itself. By the time the credits rolled it was clear it was the latter. Suppose I only have myself to blame for being so stupid as to watch this terrible flick. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 9 people found the following review useful: omg what a crap from New York, USA 29 April 2007 omg what a crap! hurry, hurry - let me out of here if these people need to be made idiots in order to be told a message, then i want to get out of this place, please, please, please let me out this a stupid movie, with stupid plot, stupid dialog, if the idea is that it was made to be seen by stupid people than it is just insulting and...stupid all right, it has a message, but i have seen porno movies that have a message to deliver and they do it better than this one did i like anything about this movie? NO! with its stupidity it reminded me of another total crap - Evolution, but at least Evolution had its funny moments, while Idiocracy had none what a complete waist of time Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 11 people found the following review useful: Cyril M. Kornbluth from Newark, DE 3 September 2006 I don't see any credit for a story which is a direct adaptation of Kornbluth's "Marching Morons". His story, though, wasn't anything resembling a comedy. The average Joe, the suspended animatio0n, the mental devolution of humanity -- these are all Kornbluth. A classic SF story, enshrined in the canon of the best of the genre, by one of the most socially incisive of the early stars, I find this lack of attribution only astounding in an era when Kornbluth's writing partner Fred Pohl is still alive and vigorous. When I last looked, the story was still owned by his heirs and assignees. The estate should sue these guys or loose Harlan Ellison on them. Hollywood's motto still remains, it seems, is "Take everything that's not nailed down, and anything that can be pried loose is not nailed down." Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 4 people found the following review useful: This would have been so much more effective as an animated film... from New York 29 March 2016 I sat through this unfunny and unspectacular movie simply because of how absurd it was. Everyone was talking about how it was a reflection of the road humanity was taking, and in a sense, it couldn't be farther from the truth. Do people really think that if only the idiots survived that the planet would still function in any conceivable way? To me, this movie is more of a criticism on the idiots who sit and watch these types of movies, complaining about the morons in society, yet do nothing about it. The armchair activists and the keyboard warriors; YOU are the reason why society will fall, because you do NOTHING. This movie fails because it was presented in the wrong cinematic format and was so amazingly unfunny it was cringe-worthy, but it did leave one lasting impression, for me at least. Humanity will not fall into idiocy simply because stupid people choose to procreate while the intelligent no longer feel the need to have children anymore. Many intelligent people see the world around them devolving into liberal bu!!s#!T, with people who complain about everything yet do nothing about it, and many of them will just ultimately say, "Screw it. I just don't care enough anymore". That will truly be society's downfall. This movie is ultimately criticizing the morons that sit behind their computer screens and complain about the world not being politically correct enough, and no longer allowing true debate and progress from taking place. It should have been an animated film, and it should have been serious. It fails as a comedy, and as social commentary, but as a biting critique on armchair warriors, it succeeds with flying colors. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 4 people found the following review useful: Promises fall short from United States 22 January 2007 Mike Judge has always had an eye for idiocy and has always delighted in pointing out the absurd in a direct, almost painful manner. This time he may have gone too far though; instead of taking a step to the side to allow the audience to see stupidity for what it is, he revels in it, smearing himself, the characters, and his film with a level of idiocy that may seem outlandish or even cartoonish to many, but may also, shockingly, seem all too familiar to anyone that's ever visited sand dunes, stadiums, cinemas, or any other place where the masses gather. Judge's targets this time around are the usual suspects: corporate America, monster truck fans, fighting fans, sex-crazed lowlifes, custom motorcycle fans, beer can cognoscenti, etc. Starbucks, Fox News {sic}, Carl's Jr., Costco, and countless others come under his fire and most don't do so well. However, the film doesn't gel well at all. The President, the Attorney General, Rita, Joe, and Upgrayedd were all excellent, and the President's address to what was apparently a joint session of Congress was actually quite realistic, what with all the swearing (like any respectable modern-day VP, I guess) but the film seems to plod on from one mini- skit to another. All is not lost in the world of tomorrow, despite the extent to which morons have taken over mainstream society. There's no hint of racism or even religion, meaning that no matter how dumb people are in the future, even they can figure out they're all the same under the skin, and even they can figure out that talking to somebody invisible in the sky and asking for favours is, well, dim... If you like idiots, or even if you are an idiot, this film is recommended -- but only for a slow Sunday afternoon or early AM after a long night out. It's heavy-handed and can be strident at times, but all said, it's good clean fun. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 8 people found the following review useful: A great idea executed horrifically 20 June 2009 *** This review may contain spoilers *** I give this movie a 2 out of 10 and I think I'm being generous. Though I don't fault the IDEA of the movie, I do fault the script writing and production of it. I could see this movie done A LOT better. So, since these people dress a little differently and are inefficient then they are stupid? If you pay attention to the movie, a lot of the characters and devices are smarter than Joe. I didn't find the movie funny and I didn't find the movie "awesome". It came across as a low-budget, haphazardly-put-together movie and was largely a disappointed and waste of 2 hours of my life. But, like I said, the IDEA of the movie was great, and the movie probably could have been great... if only it had a different script writer, producer, and director. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 8 people found the following review useful: Talented people making a terrible film from Hollywood, California 20 December 2007 I thought Office Space was very very good, but this is just plain bad. It has a few moments, but the one note joke gets old quickly. Everyone is dumb..... hey I get it, now what do we do with the other 95 minutes of the film. Often I found myself watching it like a car crash, just amazed that such talented people could make something so bad. I didn't laugh out loud once. Humorous is as good is this one gets. I'd be curious to read the script. Was it funny or was everyone so excited to work with Judge (thinking they might be in the next office space) that they just didn't care that the script was not that great. The extensive voice over is also a sign that the narrative of the film didn't work. Ironically in a movie about the dumbing down of our nation, the studio felt it needed to add the VO so that people could follow the story. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 8 people found the following review useful: Disappointing from United States 28 September 2007 I was extremely disappointed by this movie. What started out promising - a talented writer/director, a visually striking and memorable future-scape, funny and interesting details of the future world, appealing characters played by two of my favorite comedic actors, and an absolutely wonderful premise - rapidly devolved into the most basic, uninteresting plot: average guy is stuck in strange circumstances and is misunderstood, is stuck by fate with an unknown, attractive woman. Excessively contrived, unlikely, uninteresting conflict ensues. Average guy's whole quest boils down to one over-hyped dramatic moment with an unrealistic resolution. There was no point during this movie when I saw a scene or character in the future world and identified with it or a part of it so that I could see myself or my life in a new light and laugh at it. I felt no sympathy for or connection to any of the characters and saw very few recognizable traits (mine or others) in them. My only guess as to what Judge's intent here might have been is to satirize by poking fun at the genre of stupid entertainment with the very film itself. Indeed, this movie will appeal most to the Ow-My-Balls-watching crowd due to its formulaic, uninteresting, unoriginal plot, but that does not make it satire. That is simply an unfortunate coincidence. I hate to waste time on an uninteresting movie, but my disappointment here is all the greater because this could have been such a great movie. Was the above review useful to you? 6 out of 16 people found the following review useful: Ugh from Los Angeles 3 September 2006 If you liked Office Space you'll be disappointed. If you love King of The Hill, you'll be disappointed. Don't expect any clever satire here. OK, maybe it's supposed to be stupid, but this movie's cheap, one-note "look how stupid this movie is" theme gets stale quickly. We get the stupid part, yet it needn't be completely devoid of wit. Unfortunately, it is. Did they give up on this half-way through it? It makes you wonder who really are the brains behind King of The Hill, Judd or them smart-ass college boy writers FOX hires. Justin Long & Stephen Root are wasted. Luke Wilson has nothing backing him up and the other performances are pretty amateur. It has a about three maybe four legit laughs. Step backwards for Mike Judd. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 7 people found the following review useful: Most unfunny stupid excuse for a comedy film. from United Kingdom 21 December 2007 I Accidentally ordered this because i mistakenly thought Owen Wilson was in it rather than his brother Luke Wilson. Yes i'm an idiot i know, so really i should have found it funny IT Wasn't. What the hell was it all about? Yeh i actually agree that humanity is getting more stupid as time goes by, but come on this was OVER THE TOP. The actors were not funny in the slightest except the man who plays president who i've seen in a few films and is quite funny. Anyway this was a stupid waste of my time, it was so bad i can't even remember the storyline, something about a man being frozen and waking up in the future ORIGINAL...no. It was a stupid pile of American comedy trash. Don't watch it. I only give it two because of the man who played the president he made me chuckle ONCE. 2/10 from United States 14 September 2007 What can you say about a movie this painful to watch? What can you say about the otherwise talented cast that agreed to be in this movie? All I CAN SAY is someone must have been black-mailed to be in this movie. While the plot was original - a man going to sleep and waking up 500 years later to a world that is full of backwoods, hill billy types - it was not unique enough to save the story from bad writing and some lurid acting to match. Luke Wilson was his usual corny self. Maya Rudolph has definitely done better than this. And Terry Crews - well he's plays the character his plays best (outside of the Everybody Hates Chris) - the court jester. It was definitely a dynamic duo of poor taste and fallacious jokes. Well, I guess the joke was on me - given that I sat and watched this HOT MESS! Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 7 people found the following review useful: disappointing. 6 May 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** A movie that tells a story of how our future is infested with retards, well that isn't a very good idea for a movie. They must have had a hard time finding good enough actors to play stupid people, lol. The movie had cheesy special effects, cheesy acting, and cheesy comedy, the only comedy the movie used was either sex-related or calling people homosexuals. The only comedy that actually made me laugh was the TV show, "oh my balls". Dax Shepard could have been a lot more funny, same goes for Luke Wilson. One of the stupid features of the film was the costco that was at least half a mile long. They tried to make the plane crash on the inside look real, but sorry guys, it looked like a painting. Don't watch this movie. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 7 people found the following review useful: Oh what hell! from Jacksonville, FL 23 January 2007 OK, first let me say I loved Office Space. It was funny, insightful well acted and had very good plot movement. But in Idiocracy Mike Judge takes such a monumental step back it is embarrassing. The Idea of the movie is simple and I won't repeat what you can read in the plot outline, but suffice it to say that this movie, while having certain funny parts and some insight is just muddled in bad acting, awful writing and some of the worst casting I have ever seen. This movie is one of the worst most disappointing pieces of crap I have had the lack of fortune to see and I would suggest running away from the DVD box at all cost. And To you Mr. Judge..... please try harder next time (He He He said Harder!) Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 8 people found the following review useful: It just didn't have the energy from United States 1 December 2011 This movie just didn't deliver the satisfaction a movie should. The acting was sub-par and most of the jokes were lame. As far as comedies go, this movie did not really make me laugh. Lack of continuity and realism aggravated me as the plot progressed. Although this movie is able to convey a message, I feel that it's poorly executed. The humor is entirely crude like most of today's comedies, so I won't bring it down for that. All together he acting was rather poor throughout the movie, while in some scenes its decent. This movie just doesn't really deliver what a real movie should. I would not recommend this movie to anyone. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 12 people found the following review useful: Idiotic and not funny from United Kingdom 10 October 2015 The only sensitive and sensible thing I have ever heard of Fox doing was its withdrawal of this movie. I rented it on the basis of its rating here, and stopped watching after about 15 minutes--15 minutes of disgust and disbelief. The basic problem, of course, is to make the idiots sufficiently idiotic to be regarded as such by even the most intellectually challenged viewer. So we see a population of staring, mugging imbeciles, unable to concentrate on a topic or to understand it. What this results in is a lot of people whose behaviour is indistinguishable from that of the inhabitants of an asylum, so the movie encourages us to, in effect, laugh at the mentally ill. If the director was too idiotic to imagine the horror and denunciation it would cause all across the country, at least Fox wasn't. In line with the movie's desire to appeal to as wide (or low) an audience as possible, the jokes were all moronic. This is not so much a movie as an exercise in irony--ie, the director and audience, believing they are laughing at people to whom they are superior, when in fact they are laughing at a mirror. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 7 people found the following review useful: Strange Movie 2 February 2015 *** This review may contain spoilers *** This is a very strange movie. As a comedy it fails, but as a social satire its better. The biggest problem is an absolute lack of chemistry between Joe ( Luke Wilson) and Rita ( Maya Rudolph), they do not even kiss ( not even once)). If you watch movies like 'Demolition Man'( Stallone and Bullock), and 'The Running Man' ( Arnie and Maria Conchita Alonso), you get that. There is not even a bad guy like Simon or Killian, to root against. It is simply a bunch of stupid people who lack the IQ's of a dog. Spoilers ahead: the stupidest part is at the very end. when Joe becomes President of America and Rita becomes First Lady and although they have "The World's Three Smartest Kids."' The moronic VIce President had even more of "The World's Stupidist Kids and they and their descendants will outnumber Joe and Rita's Decendands, which is exactly what caused the problems in the first place.," The quote at the very end was "Joe did not save the World he just gave it a kickstart." No he did not, because everyone ( except Rita and the kids), will not listen to him ( in fact, the Next Generation will be dumber then the last). A very strange movie 2 of 10 stars. Was the above review useful to you? 0 out of 8 people found the following review useful: A walking catalog of stereotypes about already-marginalized groups from United States 3 September 2016 Others have spoken about this film's technical problems. I will outline its political problems (Yeah, I'm an SJW. Deal with it). The film relies on gross stereotypes. Here's a short catalog: - The Black pimp - The so-called "standard" dialect of North American English as indicating greater intelligence and other dialects indicating lesser intelligence - Body shaming - It seems to avoid shaming sex workers as much as I feared it would, so I gave it a point for that - It does, however, have few female characters other than Rita, and those other characters don't get much play. In this case, though, failing the Bechdel–Wallace Test might actually be the opposite of misogyny. 2 stars. from Honduras 7 February 2007 Maybe it's just me being a "mexican" but I found this movie to be utterly stupid and racist. The concept of sleeping through hundreds of years to find a world where everyone is an imbecile is interesting and engaging. The movie's plot however, is just one big "black/mexican" joke where stupid black people and Mexicans rule America. Yes, there are white people in power, Dax is the attorney with the Spanish word for a-hole as a last name; Milton is the first judge to see Joe, that other guy from Office Space is a minister of something but the majority of the people seem to be "Mexicans". The propaganda announcer has a "mexican" accent and even the stupid black president has a "mexican" last name. The movie has it's funny moments and delivers a few laughs but This movie could have been made just as funny (or unfunny) without using all these innuendos. I loved Office Space and I've been a fan of Mike Judge for some years but this movie is most assuredly not one of his best. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 10 people found the following review useful: Go For a Burger King then see this PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Author: majicrobin 1 January 2007 Anyone who is thinking of seeing this then don't, please, this film is not good, it realise on the reputation of Wilson to carry this is it does not work. I actually feel sorry for Wilson for doing this, maybe he was tricked or owed somebody some money but he should not have done this film. There are far better films out there which are worth paying your money for something better, I would rather watch pokemon then have to endure this film again and I pray that I don't have to. Lets hope Luke Wilson has a better 2007 then 2006 that he's already had Was the above review useful to you? 8 out of 24 people found the following review useful: Can you spell plagiarism? 20 November 2010 *** This review may contain spoilers *** If you've ever read The Marching Morons by Cyril M. Kornbluth (published in 1951) you'll recognize the plot and characters right down the line. Did Kornbluth even get a mention in the credits? I'd say the reason it never was distributed were some pesky little plagiarism lawsuits. Having said that. The film is a fairly good adaptation of the novel and retains a lot of the book's sense of the ridiculous. I'd give it a high grade for adaptation from another medium, but I just can't get around the primary sin it encompasses. Even if the producers did clear the rights, they should have given author credits to a marvelously funny novel. Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 18 people found the following review useful: A pinnacle of cinematic excellence. Author: chigwalla 29 August 2013 The funniest thing about this movie is that 73,000+ took the time to rate it. Even at only $10 a head, that's more than went to see it. Watch the first ten minutes, then spend the next 70 doing something productive like seeing how many fish hooks you can stick in your eyelids. If you thought this film was funny or clever, I should probably tell you that the fish hook thing was just a joke: don't really do it. Read the book instead (which, ironically, is exactly the message of the film). It's called "Marching Morons". Another reviewer called this movie plagiarism but I disagree: it doesn't tell the original story, only the superficial parts(ass & fart jokes). At least Mike Judge knows his audience. Was the above review useful to you? 7 out of 24 people found the following review useful: Meritless 25 December 2009 Unsubtle revisiting of Kornbluth's "Marching Morons" lacks any perceptible merit. Excessive voice-over explanation underscore the movie's very point that "stupid" people require heavy-handed explanation of their media. Heavy reliance on sight gags and slapstick. Acting is overdone. Dialogue is unsubtle. Feel of the show is a TV sitcom. The director conflates stupidity with dressing poorly and looking slack-jawed. For example, in early scene, explanation of the presumed greater birthrate of stupid people, film-maker not only explains the whole idea in an entirely unnecessary voice-over, but contrasts supposedly intelligent couple with supposedly unintelligent one. Yet there is no clear difference in actual intelligence. The supposedly unintelligent couple does not dress as well and is not as well-groomed, but it is hard to see these as markers of stupidity. For that matter the movie borders on offensiveness for its unsympathetic portrayal of people with different cognitive skills. Was the above review useful to you? 10 out of 31 people found the following review useful: Such A Fine Line Between Stupid and Really Stupid...... from United States 20 January 2007 If IMDb allowed for negative numbers to rate movies, this one would get '-1199'. It would be a challenge to deliberately create a movie this terrible, and for Luke Wilson, it has to be an embarrassment on his resume. There had to be an outstanding contractual obligation for him to do this or maybe he was a victim of 'shotgun casting'. Fortunately I got my money's worth as I watched this on a plane. I fear some may categorize this piece of feces as a 'cult classic' for future cable channel broadcasting. Mike Judge's previous work, Office Space, is a perfect example of that. However lightning doesn't strike twice. It is hard to describe how bad this film really is, but please, it is not worth investing your time to find that out. In concept it sounds like a great idea, but the writing and directing is so terrible that maybe their significant others actually performed the work. There were so many opportunities to be just a bit more clever with the story and the dialog, but it it never breaks that membrane. Give me Ringo Starr in Caveman. That was fun idiocracy! I won't obsess further, but I had to vent somewhere to get this thought poison out of me. Note: Near the end of the credits a message scrolls up, indicating that 'this entire movie was entirely cut on a computer'. If only that was true........... Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 20 people found the following review useful: Do you really want to give up 84 minutes of your life? from Reno, NV 31 August 2009 I had real hopes for "Idiocracy" based on a look at the cast and my immense enjoyment of Mike Judges' movie "Office Space". Additionally, years ago I read and immensely enjoyed C. M. Kornbluth's stories "The Little Black Bag" and "The Marching Morons" (the former in the Science Fiction Hall of Fame), and therefore am very familiar with the underlying premise. However, I should have kept in mind that Judge is also the genius (in the Latin sense) behind "Beavis and Butt-Head", which has rare moments of creativity, but generally very little to recommend it to anyone more intelligent or mature than its title characters; and sadly, "Idiocracy" has much more in common with that series. In it, the dialog and behavior of the characters of the future are supposed to represent those of unintelligent individuals but usually come off more as simply uneducated and boorish; and that, along with the level of internal inconsistency and the sloppy transitions, makes one feel that Judge did not feel it necessary to go to the trouble of writing multiple drafts. These problems, along with others too numerous to list succinctly, make for one of the worst movies I have seen in years. Quite simply, watching "Idiocracy" is essentially like reading "The Marching Morons" not only written about, but also for (and most importantly by) the title characters. Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 20 people found the following review useful: I want to Vote Zero out of 10 *** This review may contain spoilers *** If only I could vote zero I would. This movie shows exactly how the US culture appears to be heading, and I want to be as far from that culture as possible. The scary thing about this movie was that the vision of the future showed entertainment being enjoyed that our US contemporaries enjoy. Monster trucks, Pro wrestling, and so on. The lead female role was unfortunately about as smart as the actual characters portrayed in the future. Watching this movie made me feel less intelligent, and the humour level could easily match that of an uneducated teenager. Don't waste your time, even if you can watch it for free. Read a good book instead. Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 20 people found the following review useful: One of the worst I've ever seen Author: nick-962 12 February 2007 Never get pressured into renting a DVD because you're in a rush, you could end up renting "Idiocracy". The studio executives must have been hungover when they passed the script and budget on this one. I was actually amazed that so-called intelligent people collaborated together to make this steaming pile of excrement. The script was shoddy, the jokes were puerile, the acting wooden and the characters vacuous. Do movies have to be obsessed with sphincters and their emissions in order to be funny? Considering the content of this movie the ideas seem to have originated from the bottom of an overflowing potty anyway. Avoid this stinker like the plague! Was the above review useful to you? 9 out of 30 people found the following review useful: Precisely *** This review may contain spoilers *** Stop being part of the problem. Natural Born Killers was. Now, Mike Judge is. He had one hit. One: Office Space. And admittedly, that movie was near perfection. His other outings that I've seen: Extract and this, Idiocracy have been both embarrassments and the very reason he's saying the future will be filled with idiots. This movie is so incredibly pathetic, it makes Jersey Shore look intelligent. And I'm not saying I didn't get the humor. Oh, I got it. I was five once. And even at that age, I would've turned my nose at this. The entire concept is so old – one military fool and one ugly prostitute get dumped into an experiment that inadvertently has them sleep 500 years, only to awake in a commercial-based, nation of fools – that even Futurama on its WORST day would be ashamed. Once awakened, Rita (Maya Rudolph) and Joe (Luke Wilson) are the smartest members of a degrading human race bent on killing themselves by watering plants with energy drinks vs. water. I want to stop there. Not in fear of spoiling anything further, but as I am thoroughly disgusted in even thinking of this movie any longer. I mean, I get where they were going – product placement, ads, Costco, TV, blah, blah – but this would've been best served as a 20 minute Adult Swim CARTOON, NOT a 90 minute film. You really want to know what would cause a future of morons? The continuation of series like Jersey Shore and (previously) Beavis & Butthead. Movies green lit like Natural Born Killers, the Twilight series or any Mike Judge film (outside the office.) Don't you see, people? We're our own worst enemy and this…this atrocity… has to stop. You might think it's funny, hardy har, but think of what you're actually doing to impressionable kids or the image of Americans you're further damaging to the world's perspective. Oh, and did I mention all the blatant homophobia that might have started as a running bad joke but turned into just plain…hatred? Soap box aside, this was an incredibly lame attempt at humor. Not one joke hit its mark and the actors involved had to have acted even dumber to sign on than their characters on screen. SKIP AT ALL COSTS. Was the above review useful to you? 13 out of 38 people found the following review useful: Ugh from NYC 5 June 2008 Quite simply, one of the worst movies I have ever seen. This movie TRIES to be a social satire, but it is so broad, so clumsy, so turgid, so bloated, so self-conscious, so obvious, so sophomoric, and so clichéd that you will want your two hours back. Do not, under any circumstances, rent, TiVo or accidentally find yourself viewing this movie. It's a disaster and a colossal failure on every level. Nothing works. Nothing. It doesn't make you think. It doesn't do anything but club you over the head. Dialogue is painful. Acting is cringe-inducingly vaudevillian. Dax Shepherd plays such a convincing idiot you believe he has actually been brain damaged during filming, but instead of being interesting, it is off-putting, and tiresome. Luke Wilson flounders around, completely bereft of personality, playing the same earnest naif he always plays, and basically since the film ostensibly revolves around him, there is no emotional performance anchoring this mess and giving it any credibility whatsoever. The rest of the performances are equally inept, with actors flailing around in an effort to find a tonal consensus and all of them visibly aching to return to their trailers. Was the above review useful to you? 13 out of 39 people found the following review useful: I don't quite get why people liked it. from Los Angeles, CA USA 10 January 2007 I love Mike Judge because of Office Space, I love Luke Wilson because of Old School, and I love Maya Rudolph and Horatio Sanz because of SNL. Still, this movie rarely made me laugh. The thing is, I think Mike Judge underestimated his audience by hoping we'd laugh WITH the characters in this movie. It's an insult to even fathom that I would laugh at the same things as them. The endless ass and fart jokes make me long for the comparatively mature humor of Beavis and Butthead. Don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of that kind of humor. But it works better in fifteen minute TV segments. I understand the social statement Judge is trying to make here, but it wasn't well conveyed. The plot was flimsy, it seemed to duck out of trouble spots all too easily, and I wasn't impressed with the conclusion. Lots of unresolved plot points, plenty of missed opportunities to fit in more intellectually relevant humor, and cheaper than dirt fart jokes made for a pretty painful ride. If you're looking for something along the lines of Old School, keep moving. I suppose if you're a fan of Deuce Bigalow you may want to give this one a watch. I really can't recommend this movie to anyone expecting more than just an hour and a half long fart joke. Was the above review useful to you? 13 out of 39 people found the following review useful: I'm sorry from United States 9 January 2007 This is simply one of the worst movies I have ever seen, and certainly the worst since I last watched "Cabin Boy". Honestly. There is a reason you haven't heard of this movie. It is an absolute abomination. There were 2 funny lines elsewise it was the same joke over and over. My words are really insufficient to describe how suicide-inducingly wretched this movie is. Luke Wilson must have owed some sort of favor to Judge, Maya Rudolph, of course, has no apparent acting ability, despite a large chest, and Dax Shepard's name is Dax Shepard. I think Judge had a decent idea for a movie but never really thought it through, tossed it all together haphazardly, and you wonder why you didn't hear about this movie; I'm sure the studio didn't really bother to advertise it. This movie makes me want to kill myself, not because of the ominous future it portends, but the possibility that anyone actually finds this funny means the warning is relevant not in the future but already in the present. Was the above review useful to you? 14 out of 41 people found the following review useful: Good idea of idiotic future, bad production, therefore wrong audience from Oslo, Norway 30 December 2006 The story of the movie is just perfect. All futuristic movies describe an advanced civilization. This movie chooses the other way around, outsmarting all other super-advanced-Hollywood-fictional-hi-tech scripts. May be movie was supposed to be rated with "R+"; the emphasis on sex-related "humor" is off the charts. In my opinion, the prime target for the movie is below 14 years of age, like may be 12. It definitely doesn't address for 25+ people. It's not funny at all, I don't remember I have laughed even once. Story is short; he solves exactly one problem. I think this story could be expressed in far better ways than this movie. It's a brilliant idea, but bad screenplay. Movie tried to tell "how stupid can we get" in a stupid (or, may be, "poor") way. From this point of view, it's successful; it's all about stupid stuff, and it's all told in stupid way. I, however, still believe that it could be a movie that still shows "how stupid can we get" in a smarter way. As a conclusion; it's recommended to be watched but don't expect real comedy or smart jokes. Don't try to watch during your romantic moments, not to mention keep this movie away from your children. Was the above review useful to you? 23 out of 59 people found the following review useful: Not close to Office Space! from United States 31 July 2006 I was invited to view the movie during post-production. I was led to believe that the humor was geared more toward the comedy of Office Space (a very clever and funny film by Mike Judge) and King of the Hill. I revere Mike Judge as a great satirist. His creations are generally unique, and they help me to relax and have a good laugh. During the movie, I there was so much bathroom humor, I wondered why they didn't say it was more like Beavis and Butthead, because the movie will obviously appeal more to a less-mature audience. I'm not trying to discredit the movie in anyway, because I did enjoy it, at times I was laughing myself to tears. I just don't think that this film was up to par with what Judge is truly capable of. The film will be a great hit for Beavis and Butthead fans. I was just hoping it to be a film I would like to see more than once. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 18 people found the following review useful: crap is a cute word to describe this film from Uruguay 21 August 2007 my comment, if you saw "billy Madison" directed by Tamra Davis (adam Sander is the principal actor), is similar to the comment of the director of the school. "Mr Madison...nothing rational.." this movie is about stupid and incoherent people, and its for the same kind of people. Unbelievable. this movie is in the top 3 of the disgusting films list. money for nothing. The worst thing, is that Luke Wilson is a fine actor who made good actions in the past. This "peace of sound-visual material" would make a hole in his career (maybe forever). The thread is sad and makes you sick. I wish I have ever seen this movie, but the reality says that i'm a victim of this threat to the cinematographic community. thanks for the chance to express my opinion. I'm Nicolas from Uruguay (little country in south America in the middle of Argentina and Brazil). bye! Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 18 people found the following review useful: This Movie Is A No Brainer from Gambia 2 July 2007 Idiocracy is one of the worst movies I ever saw. It was shallow, boring, unintelligent and definitely not funny. If you try to make a movie that wants to criticize modern society you have to be better than that what you are going to criticize. In this way the movie is self-reflexive and part of the system that it wanted to criticize and therefore fails totally in what it intended to do. I'm totally disappointed with the movie. The idea of the story could have let to an entertaining movie, but the actual realization is inane in itself. The positive reception of the movie and the movie itself might actually indicate that Idiocracy is already upon us. Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 18 people found the following review useful: Damn if I didn't waste an hour and twenty minutes.... from United States 24 May 2007 So when I think of this movie I think of that scene of Billy Madison....when Billy answers a question about economy- and the judge says, I think we all just got dumber from listening to it. Well I just got dumber from watching this movie...please do not waste your time, or money. Luke Wilson is funny, but not so much on his own....he needs his trusted comedians with him. Oh and for being the smartest man in the world, he is pretty dumb when he can't figure out Maya's character is a hooker. Dax was a waste of good talent, but then again what movies has Dax been in where his talent was good...Keep with the reality Punk'd. Maya Rudoplh-another waste of talent...so she reads the script and thinks..."hmmm a hooker who is stuck in the future...sounds appealing" I sure hope you got some cash for that. I don't see the appeal for being stupid...especially for any of these characters...bad bad bad....Being Stupid is not a laughing matter. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 20 people found the following review useful: Technicolor yawn from United States 24 March 2008 Never before has a movie been so awful that I have physically vomited due to the lack of worthwhile entertainment. It is apparent that the target audience needs to have a similar IQ to the characters portrayed in this movie. If you find that you are a brain damaged individual, you may may find this to be a good movie. Sorry, Mike Judge, you usually don't let me down. The anorexic plot has few chuckles involved. Even looking at Luke Wilson (who I rather enjoy looking at) became rather difficult. Maya's character wasn't involved enough. Even the transitions from one scene to the next were choppy and uncomfortable. Honestly, I think I'd prefer the film in the movie to this one. Speaking of which, the title, though fitting to a degree, should have been more simple to the simple nature of the film. Perhaps "Duh" or "Stupid" may have worked better. THEN you might get the idea beforehand. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 20 people found the following review useful: Seriously -- Not Even NEAR Funny from United States 15 December 2007 The people giving this movie positive reviews MUST be working for Fox hoping to get DVD sales. I love Office Space, Supertroopers... plenty of movies that are best experienced after 4:20 and plenty of beers. But this film straight up isn't one of them. I started watching it because I think Luke Wilson is hilarious and it sounded like a fun concept. I FINISHED watching it wondering how movies like this actually get made. I didn't laugh once. I didn't smile once. This from a guy who laughed out loud at Beerfest. This film takes up 80-odd minutes -- you'll get more laughs by lighting your farts on fire for 15 minutes. If it's a choice between this god-awful film and lighting farts on fire, opt for the farts. By the way; one thing I would be really interested in seeing is a documentary on how a film like this actually gets made. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 20 people found the following review useful: Just being honest from New Zealand 10 September 2007 I'm sorry but I can't compare this to Office Space. I love Supertroopers, Office Space, Old School, Harold and Kumar, Talladega Nights even Dude where's my car, especially on a lazy Sunday. The storyline had potential but there're no lead comedic roles. Luke Wilson needs a Will Ferrell, and supporting act 'Frito' is the closest this film gets. The bummer is, this is my sort of movie, yet it is easily one of the worst films i've seen in years. If you're not a teenager, don't watch this film. I'm 27 and love silly comedy but if you're looking for something around this release date to watch, maybe Knocked Up or Big Nothing (with simon pegg). Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 20 people found the following review useful: Terrible Author: Mr W 16 July 2007 This has got to be one of the worst films in the world. I joined IMDb just to warn people on how much this sucked and how I've wasted my time on such a drab,poor,awful film this is. Please for the sake of your life's do not attempt to waste your time on this pile of excrement. Mr Wilson must have been out of his mind when he agreed to take part in this film,well can I call it a film.Anyways the rest of the cast are a bunch of nobodies with just a vision of acting in the worst film in the universe. I know its only my opinion but iv'e seen a lot of films and bad ones at that but this takes the biscuit, eats it an then steals your soul. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 20 people found the following review useful: Worst Movie EVER Made? from Springfield, MA, USA 26 January 2007 This is worse than most "straight to DVD" movies, which this film basically did anyways. Quite possibly the worst movie ever made. The only people who will think it is entertaining are the people that the movie makes fun of. This film features a joke about the top movie in 2505 being called "Ass" which was just 90 minutes of a butt farting. That is just about as bad as this movie. I can't believe I spent money to rent this movie. I feel sorry for Luke Wilson & Maya Rudolph. Either they knew how bad this movie was while they were making and finished it anyway, or they didn't know until they saw it for themselves...but I am sure they both would love for this movie to disappear off movie store shelves as soon as possible. I also nominate Terry Crews for Worst Actor Ever for this movie but he will have some stiff competition for that Award from Dax Shepard. Holy crap, I can't even put into words how bad this movie is. Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 22 people found the following review useful: This was half an hour or so I could've spent in the pub. from Antrim: Wierdo Central. 6 January 2008 My film buff friend lent me a big case of DVDs and he usually has good taste so one night me, the wife and our house mate put this complete pile of yang in the DVD player. It's a good idea but it is executed so badly and in a way that is so anti-funny that I felt like gouging my eyes out or else hunting down every individual involved in it's production and beating them to death with a wheel brace. The script feels like it was written by a group of 14 year old boys and the gags are few and far between. I first noticed that something was wrong after about 5 minutes but thought I would give the film a chance. Half an hour later my house mate voiced what we had all been thinking with the immortal line, "this is the biggest load of ballix I've ever seen in all my puff." After heartily agreeing with him I got up and turned it off before throwing the disc into the river at the back of my house and then rang my friend to ask him what in God's name he was playing at recommending this absolute piece of garbage. After being exposed to this twaddle you will feel empty inside and be ashamed to belong to the same species that produced it. Unless you happen to find bodily functions the most hilarious thing,OMG! like, ever! You have been warned... Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 22 people found the following review useful: I wished this film had been better, I really did from Hawaii, USA 17 September 2007 So I read that Mike Judge "borrowed" the idea from C.M. Kornbluth's Marching Morons, but like most Hollywood films today everyone "borrows" from someone else. So I watched this film wondering if Fox made the right decision to let this film sit around and then basically let it die a sad death. After 10 minutes I realized that they made a good decision. It is bad. Not particularly bad acting, Maya Rudolph and Luke Wilson seemed more than adequate delivering their lines. It was not even a particularly bad idea. It's just that the idea didn't really materialize into anything more. The script was flat, one-dimensional, character-destroying and just plain horrible. Some nice touches, mostly visual, but the script didn't make sense and the actors were forced to meander through a waste of 84 minutes of everyone's time. As I said, I really wanted to like this movie, I really did. Was the above review useful to you? 6 out of 26 people found the following review useful: Ameri-duh from United States 12 March 2007 A beautiful five-minute set-up persuades you that America is heading for reproductive oblivion; This part is pretty funny. But it's all downhill from there, with a script written (seemingly) by either a numb SNL writer or a pro-wrestler. It's a tired retread of Roman Coppola's equally awful "Spirit of 76." Have you ever met anyone who describes themselves as a fan of Luke Wilson movies? I'm at a loss for what makes people go to a Luke Wilson movie. He has one style of delivering his lines no matter what the part, "sincerity," with raised eybrows. He's easy on the eyes, but I've never laughed at a single word that has come out of his mouth. Inexplicably, there he is, the lead in half a dozen "comedies." Maya Rudolph breaks into film here with a part that's beneath her. Was the above review useful to you? 7 out of 28 people found the following review useful: Idiocracy: Not one to watch 24 April 2007 *** This review may contain spoilers *** Idiocracy should not be put aside lightly, it should be thrown with great force. Although the idea that non-smart people tend to have more children than their smart counterparts is essentially a good one (and quite possibly a correct one) - this film does not in any way realize its potential. Anti-hero Joe Bauers and a (partly) turned good prostitute participates in military project in the early 21st century. They are supposed to be frozen down and then be defrosted/reanimated after one year. However, when they come to life again, they find themselves 500 years into the future. USA has somehow survived as a nation but is populated exclusively by very irritating morons portrayed in an overly stereotypical manner. By the end of the film every single character annoyed me! I currently feel a growing mistrust towards any future film to come out of the hands of director and writer Mike Judge Was the above review useful to you? 7 out of 28 people found the following review useful: Lame and not even slightly funny. from United Kingdom 31 December 2006 I read the first few comments on this movie before I viewed it. I was expecting a good ride. The movie starts okay. It's a tool idea. To be honest I had trouble even getting thru the whole film. I loved Bottle Rocket with Luke Wilson. This isn't even close to being as good. I look in total disbelief at the comments of laughing out loud at this garbage. It's just not funny let alone laughing. Luke Wilson looked embarrassed to even be in some of the scenes. I'm not at all surprised this didn't get promoted or generally released in cinemas. The story is lame and insulting. It actually plays to the people that it supposed to parody. How ironic ! I say avoid at all costs. 1/10 Was the above review useful to you? 8 out of 30 people found the following review useful: Eugencists Strikes Back Author: disabledmemorial 6 March 2010 Eugenics is the study and practice of selective breeding applied to humans, with the aim of improving the species. In a historical and broader sense, eugenics can also be a study of "improving human genetic qualities. "Advocates of eugenics sought to counter what they regarded as spoiler of genetics dynamics within the human gene pool, specifically in regard to congenital disorders and factors relating to the heritability of IQ. This movie is a clear eugenics message. That's to say Eugencists are Striking Back. And Eugenics is totally unethical, and leads to racism. Was the above review useful to you? 12 out of 38 people found the following review useful: You have have to be an "idiot" to enjoy "Idiocracy" from Doha, Qatar 10 February 2007 As much as I want to love this movie, as long as I have waited for it's release since I heard about it, and as much as I loved "Office Space" and "King of the Hill" and all things Judge, I couldn't. I overlooked many stupid things in the movie, but finally have to admit that this movie is a piece of crap. I thought maybe Fox wouldn't release it because it makes fun of them and many other corporations, but now I see how it really is: The movie simply sucked. They want us to believe that the future society of the USA is so dumb that they don't know how to water their crops with water and not sports drink, YET we see airplanes, monster trucks (500 years in the future and we still have monster trucks with combustion engines?), television, guns, cars, subways, video cameras, etc. Yet they don't know plants need water? Sorry, but the basic premise of the movie is that humans are so dumb we are starving, yet many of the other basic things in life are still around and working, so that ruins it right there. There was way too much for me to overlook, as in: The main characters are in two hibernation units that are unplugged and thrown in a dump for 500 years, yet...with no power, no food, nothing...they both survive and walk away as if from a nice sleep. Money is still somehow being printed, television is still being broadcast, movie are still being filmed....all 500 years in the future... The acting was terrible and overblown, and despite several funny gags, I couldn't wait for the movie to be over. I am glad I only rented it on Netflix and not in the theater, as it was cheaper. This is probably the disappointment of the year for me. Maybe Judge is being ironic; the kind of people who enjoyed this film probably didn't realize it was about them. Was the above review useful to you? 16 out of 46 people found the following review useful: 5 decent jokes cannot make a movie from United States 8 January 2007 I think Mike Judge is brilliant. Love King of the Hill and Office Space is an all time favorite. This movie, however, was shockingly horrible. There were about five jokes worthy of a chuckle. Costco taking up several square miles (and the greeter greeting with 'welcome to costco, I love you'), plants being fed some sort of a Gatorade drink because 'it's what plants crave'... and OK, I forget the other ones. Honestly, even these are things a buddy might come up with drunk at a party. Regardless, what should have been a laughable 5 minute bit at a LA comedy club somehow turned into an hour plus pile of steaming dung which is this film. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 21 people found the following review useful: I know this is cliché, but I want my hour and a half back 1 March 2008 *** This review may contain spoilers *** This was by far the dumbest movie I have ever seen. I love stupid comedies like Napolean Dynamite, Anchorman, among others, and I even love Mike Judge's "Office Space", but this was just awful. The "funny" bits sounded like I was listening to a bunch of middle schoolers make jokes to get attention. The level of stupidity of the culture (which i know was the point of the movie) was just too dumb to be enjoyable. The plot sucked, the characters were shallow and poorly acted, and the ending was so predictable. Who in their right mind would stay with a place where they were surrounded by complete idiots? Honestly, I want this movie to warn you about how bad it is before it starts, just so you can't be as mad at it when the credits role as I was. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 21 people found the following review useful: this was so bad This may have been the worst movie I have ever seen. Luke, shame on you. You're attractive and a pretty good actor, please start picking GOOD movies. I feel dumber having watched this. I rented this thinking, "hmm, maybe it will have some insight into the future of our race," or at least that's what the synopsis on the back promises, Unfortunately, I was sorely mistaken. Anyone who enjoys this movie and would see it more than once is just as big an idiot at the humans portrayed in it. Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 23 people found the following review useful: Could have been a rather good movie if they'd decided to keep IQ at least over shoe size.. from Sweden 2 February 2007 Very disappointing after the very funny "Office space" Plot has been tried before, but never mind that. However, the movie could have been infinitely better had they chosen to give the characters at least the charming innocent "retard-ness" so to speak of children/Forrest Gump/Rainman. As it was now, you'd think the primary goal was "make sure no one regardless of IQ miss the fact that people in the future are all but brain dead! I like plots drawn with a pencil, not a paint-roller.. I guess i would have liked it more in my early teens, but now I have a hard time coping with over-acting and exaggerations (guess that is why i didn't really care for "Dumb and dumber" either)? All in all i can't give this movie more than 1 out of 10 Sorry. Was the above review useful to you? 7 out of 31 people found the following review useful: Fun romp plus creepy eugenic plaidoyer from United States 22 January 2007 The movie gets 5 or six stars as entertainment, but negative 10 for its blatant eugenic message. The DVD case claims that in the future which the movie portrays, humanity has been "dumbed-down by consumer culture." This is a flat-out lie (presumably necessary, since most potential renters would be put off if they knew the real premise). In fact, in the first 5 minutes, the movie states in no uncertain terms that the "dumbing-down" is a genetic phenomenon: some people are born stupid, stupidity is hereditary, and the stupid are (now) out-breeding the non-stupid, so that in the future only the very stupid are left. This claim is stated repeatedly and totally explicitly, and illustrated with case studies and colorful graphics. (As part of this we get to see just who the stupid are in Mike Judge's book: they are poor, they are Southern, they have modest housing and clothes, and they speak in dialect. The contrasting non-stupids are wealthily dressed and housed and speak the favored variety of American English. Judge doesn't even bother to dissociate his idea of "stupidity" from his class prejudice by showing the "stupids" actually doing anything especially stupid; having a large number of children might seem like a candidate stupid activity, but that's the very activity that Judge is encouraging his non-stupids to engage in, so he can't very well call that stupid...) Mike Judge joins a long line of alarmists who are terrified that the genetically inferior will out-breed and swamp the Master Race. Under the name of "eugenics", this notion was all the rage with American fascists in the late 19th and early 20th century, who passed numerous laws forbidding the "feeble-minded" to breed (it was usually left up to judges to decide what that term actually mean; epilepsy for example was construed as within its purview) and, in many US states, mandating forced sterilization. The most famous eugenicists were of course the Nazis, whose program to save the genetically superior from the hordes of quicker-breeding sub-humans bypassed the whole sterilization process and moved right to "euthenasia" for the mentally retarded (and of course for other "genetically inferior" types as well). Thanks to the Nazis, most of the civilized world has lost its stomach for eugenics. But not Mike Judge, I guess. Please don't think I'm overstating the eugenic message in this movie; watch the first five minutes or ask anyone who has. What is stupid is that without this fascist idiocy, the movie would be a funny little time-waster at least worth recommending to a bored friend. The stupid stuff is sort of funny. Dax Shepard is an Oscar-caliber doofus. The intro could have just as easily blamed the stupidity on "consumer culture" or whatever and made the movie into (light-weight) social critique; nothing else about the plot would've needed to be changed. Was the above review useful to you? 5 out of 28 people found the following review useful: Not worth the time from Sweden 31 December 2006 Terrible acting and the plot is non existing. The movie might be considered funny by a bunch of retarted five year olds, that's how refined the jokes are. People running around talking funny is not my cup of tea. And by the way, some times they talk really funny because it is the new evolved language in the future but the next second they talk perfectly fine and just through in a half strange word every second sentence. I thought they could have spent the money one a better screenplay or given the money to some third world country, that would have been money put to better use than this. I doubt this movie will ever come to the theaters. Was the above review useful to you? 3 out of 27 people found the following review useful: Easily the worst movie I have ever seen from United States 23 January 2007 I can't believe 20th Century Fox actually released this movie. Maybe you have to be high on drugs or otherwise have an I.Q. in the subhuman category to enjoy this movie. Being both sober and sane, I hated it. After the first 20 minutes or so, I found myself fast-forwarding through the movie hoping it would improve, but even at 3X speed, this movie didn't end soon enough. As far as I'm concerned this was definitely a career ender for any actor involved. It wasn't funny in the least bit, totally childish with no redeeming traits. Fox would do well to find all the copies and pay triple the sales price to get them all back, then burn them. At least the title was appropriate. It explained the mindset of the writer, producer, actors, and director. It's very difficult to find anything nice to say about this movie, and I was always told that if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all. I mean seriously, even comedy should make sense. Don't waste your money even renting this one. Was the above review useful to you? 4 out of 31 people found the following review useful: Vulgar, sick, Unintelligent movie 19 January 2007 A WARNING to parents with Values, or anyone else for that matter: This movie has a great PLOT IDEA, BUT......instead of making a great comedy, with laughs galore, it screws everything up by using...... ....vulgarity, and profanity, and FALLS FAR SHORT of even a "good" movie. Directed by Mike Judge. His other movie "Office Space" was deemed funny, but this one is largely just vulgarity and perversion. The characters were cheap, shallow, goofy, people. The entire idea of a low IQ Society, as dumb as the ones shown in this film, goes to show you Hollywood must think we need really dumb characters to think better of ourselves. Speak for yourself Hollywood. I get tired of low morality jerks making lame films. Even "The Thing" (John Carpenter's remake) had less cussing in it! (Enjoyable horror flick by the way). Want to see a enjoyable movie? Watch "CLICK" (Adam Sandler). It's a great movie with enjoyable characters, and lots of good humor! w w w.myhoperadio.com People, stay away from this one. It'll fry your brains! Stay away!!!! Who made this gad awful movie? IDIOTIC at best! Save yourself the trouble of not watching this movie. Awful acting, awful script, Just plain awful movie. PERIOD!! ---------------- People, stay away from this one. It'll fry your brains! Stay away!!!! Who made this gad awful movie? IDIOTIC at best! Save yourself the trouble of not watching this movie. Awful acting, awful script, Just plain awful movie. PERIOD!!! Was the above review useful to you? 2 out of 29 people found the following review useful: The dumbest movie I have ever seen from United States 11 September 2007 OK, I cannot believe that Beerfest could ever be beaten. This is the absolute worst movie of all time. I don't know how anyone can think this was funny. There wasn't one laugh in it. It was more of a documentary on what is going to happen when NASCAR fans and reality show fans reproduce. I know that's cold, but they might find some humor in this. You have to be misogynistic, love fart jokes, and think that someone getting kicked in the balls is a hoot. What's up with that. Luke Wilson has made three movies that I know of with Will Ferrell. It has definitely screwed him up. He should buy the rights to this and destroy it. Was the above review useful to you? 1 out of 35 people found the following review useful: the movie was raciest!!!!! from United States 23 June 2007 the movie had very few funny parts in it.most of it was the depletion of the human race that they got so dumb that they let minorities run the united states and the white man had to come in and save the day. thats a great message to send across America. everyone who had Spanish last names was extraordinarily dumb. plus the president was black with the Spanish last name and he let the u.s go to crap. they also showed that with minorities in charge that society succumbed to idiots, therefore they elect minorities and their goal which is not much different than today is to have sex and drink Gatorade & beer, and eat fast food all day long. It is a shame because Was the above review useful to you? Page 1 of 2:

King of the Hill

What company used the advertising slogan “because I’m worth it”?

The Misery Senshi Neo-Zero Double Blitzkrieg Debacle THE MISERY SENSHI NEO-ZERO DOUBLE BLITZKRIEG DEBACLE A Daria/Sailor Moon Crossover Fan Fiction Story By Peter W. Guerin (Mr. Guerin can be contacted at DocForbin@Hotmail.com) With apologies to Naoko Takeuchi and Glenn Eichler. AUTHOR'S DISCLAIMER None of this ever happened. However, for those of you keeping score at home, the events roughly (and I mean roughly) follow the events depicted in "Bishojo Senshi Sailor Moon Sailor Stars", which was the fifth and final season of the original Japanese series. Further, the original Japanese civilian identities of the Sailor Senshi are used, in Oriental order (i.e. family name first) as well as all other Japanese characters depicted in this story. Almost all aircraft depicted in this story have been checked with the publication "Aircraft of the World: The Complete Guide" (Pittsburgh: International Masters Publishers, 1996-present; series of factsheets published every three weeks). The sole exception is the Mitsubishi Neo-Zero, which is a complete creation of the author. All "Bishojo Senshi Sailor Moon" and related characters are (C) 1992,1998 Naoko Takeuchi/Kodansha/Toei Animation Co., Ltd./DIC Enterprises LP. All "Daria" and related characters are (C) 1993, 1997, 1998 MTV Networks. All Rights Reserved. All other characters depicted are my creation. So there. SONG CREDITS "Morning Has Broken": Traditional lyrics by Elinor Ferjoen. Musical arrangement by Cat Stevens. (C) 1972 Cat Stevens. Appearing on his album "Teaser and the Firecat" on A&M CD's and cassettes. "Ty Cobb": lyrics by Chris Cornell; music by Ben Shepherd. (C) 1996 You Make Me Sick I Make Music (ASCAP)/Stupidditties (ASCAP). All Rights Reserved. Appearing on the Soundgarden album "Down on the Upside" on A&M CD's and cassettes. "Black Hole Sun": lyrics and music by Chris Cornell. (C) 1994 You Make Me Sick I Make Music (ASCAP). All Rights Reserved. Appearing on the Soundgarden album "Superunknown" on A&M CD's and cassettes.. "Monk Time" , "I Hate You" and "Complication": written by Gary Burger, Larry Clark, Dave Day, Roger Johnston and Eddie Shaw. (C) 1965 Monk Time Publishing (BMI); administered by Bug Music. All Rights Reserved. Appearing on the Monks album "Black Monk Time" on Infinite Zero Archive CD's. Distributed by American Recordings. "Kimigayo": Words selected from the seventh volume of "Kokinshu" dating from AD 9th Century; English translation by Sakuzo Takada; Music by Hiromori Hayashi. "Tusk": Lyrics and music by Lindsey Buckingham. (C) 1979 New Sounds Music (ASCAP). All Rights Reserved. Appearing on the Fleetwood Mac album "Tusk" on Warner Bros. CD's and cassettes. AUTHOR'S DEDICATION This story is dedicated to my mother's favorite author, Tom Clancy. This story may be a bit evocative of his style, so please bear with me. "Sky Pilot!/Sky Pilot!/How high can you fly?/You'll never, never, never reach the sky!" --Eric Burden, The Animals, "Sky Pilot" "War!/Good God, you all!/What's it any good for?/Absolutely nothing!/Say it again!" --Edwin Starr, Edwin Starr's Rising Starr, "War" "Though force can protect in an emergency, only justice, fairness, consideration and cooperation can finally lead men to the dawn of eternal peace." --Dwight David Eisenhower, General, U. S. Army, later President of the United States Data 1: Ebon Genesis Sweet Adeline A huge crowd had gathered in the mass meeting room of Sumito Heavy Industries for what was expected to be a brief pep rally before the start of the day's business. All were clad in the same blue suits typical of Japanese businessmen in Shinjuku, the business district of Tokyo. At one end was a platform were the top executives of the company were seated as well as a podium for speaking. However, it was the banner affixed to the wall that was unusual: a brown octopus on a white disc on a red field. At once, everyone's attention was focused on the podium as one of the persons on the platform rose to speak. However, this was not one of the executives; she was an "OL", or office lady. But no other "OL" like her existed in Japan. Yoriko was tall and statuesque, and was well-proportioned with ample bust, slender hips, long legs and short, black hair. Banging the gavel, she called the meeting to order. "I know that we have much work to do, so I will keep this brief," said Amazana Yoriko. "I have glorious news that will gladden the hearts of everyone in our organization. We think the Neo-Zero prototype will be ready for its first test flight by month's end. Ryu, our intelligence officer, will explain." The podium was yielded to Chang Ryu, a man of unusually handsome qualities due to his mixed Chinese-Korean-Japanese ancestry. He was about six and a half feet tall with brown hair. Ryu was a master of many martial arts disciplines, holding black belts in judo, tae kwan do, kung fu, karate, and kendo, or Japanese fencing. Only a few months ago he resigned as a priest of the legendary Shaolin Temple to be involved in what Sumito termed "Project Iron Fist." Ryu started to speak in his clear, enthusiastic voice: "I've been checking the progress of the prototype, and most ground tests have been completed. It is expected that the prototype will be fitted with a full compliment of Sidewinder missiles for target practice; once they are loaded, we will launch our plan to hijack the prototype and start our attack on Tokyo. Once we have the civilian government in submission, the New Imperial Rule Assistance Association will embark on a new era for Japan, and once again we will earn the respect of the world. All hail to our leader, Amazana Yoriko. BANZAI!" After five shouts of "BANZAI!", the meeting adjourned. Yoriko went back to her office, where Dr. Helmut Vander Helffen was awaiting her; he looked middle-aged with black hair and spectacles; he was wearing a brown double-breasted suit. "It's time for your next pill," was all he said. Tsukino Ikuko was doing what she usually did every morning: trying to get her oldest daughter Usagi out of bed: "Usagi, you lazy bastard! Get out of bed now!" Luna, Usagi's pet cat, was jolted out of her sleep by Ikuko's yelling. She hissed and scratched Usagi's nose. "OW!", shrieked Usagi. "Usagi! It's time to get up for school!," began Luna. "You are so lazy it's pathetic!" "I already have Mom on my case, Luna," shrieked Usagi; "I don't need to hear it from you as well!" With a deft movement, Usagi took off her pajamas and raced to her closet--wearing nothing but her panties--to grab a bra. She began to pack up her briefcase. "You know, I think that peeping Tom from across the street is looking at you again!", chuckled Luna. Usagi shrieked and drew down the curtains. "Luna, you really get on my nerves at times," yelled Usagi at Luna. Luna replied, "Hey, I deserve a good laugh once in a while!" Kenji, Ikuko's husband, and their son, Shingo, were already at the breakfast table. Kenji was reading the "Yorimuri Shimbun" when he noticed an interesting article. "Hey, what about those Giants!," he exclaimed; "one more win and they clinch the Japan Series!" "Wonderful, dear," was all his wife said rather abstractly. "Man, Usagi's gonna get it big time from Ms. Sakurada if she's late again," Shingo proclaimed. As if to confirm that remark, Usagi ran downstairs, clad in her seifuku, gulped down a glass of milk, wolfed down a piece of toast, and dashed out the door like the devil before anyone noticed. She was several steps down the road when a car horn blared, and a familiar red car pulled up besides her. "Usagi! Get in! It's the only way you'll make it on time for your first class!," a voice shouted to her. Usagi knew that voice rather well. It was her boyfriend, Chiba Mamoru. As Usagi got in, she noticed two other persons in the car: her friend Mizuno Ami, the smartest student in class, and Chiba-Usa, Usagi and Mamoru's daughter from the future. Chiba-Usa had spent the night at Ami's house. "Running late again, I see," Chiba-Usa said in her holier-than-thou attitude. "Put a sock in it, Chiba-Usa!", replied Usagi. "Usagi, you should really get up earlier," Ami started. "It's part of doing well in school." "Ami's got a point there, Usako," Mamoru added. "Your grades aren't that great. With the big exams coming up, you've got to do better." Usagi groaned. "Speaking of tests," Ami said, "I figure you'd be the first ones to learn about some exciting news I got yesterday." "What?," Usagi asked. "I found out that I've been accepted for my pre-med studies in Germany," gushed Ami; "At long last, I can begin my studies to become a pediatrician like my mother! I leave in four days." Usagi was at first speechless. "Congratulations!," Mamoru said. "I know that you've been looking forward to this for a long time." "But what about the Sailor Senshi?," Usagi said as she recovered from the shock of the announcement. "You're the brains of the team!" "Not to worry, Usagi," Ami began. "I've got that covered. Luna and Artemis have been working on transferring my powers to another person. The Sailor Senshi will still be at full strength while I'm gone." "Who do you have in mind?," Chibi-Usa asked. "Let's just say that she's as intelligent as I am," Ami teased. The calls to prayer wafted in the air in Beirut. In a nondescript building, however, there was something sinister afoot. The local branch of Islamic Jihad was meeting to formulate their next terrorist attack. The Imam Al-Kabaz, the leader of the branch, was clad in a black robe and had a long black beard. He arose to speak. "It is time to strike fear into the heart of the Great Satan!" he began; "In four days will be the great football game between Highland and Lawndale High Schools. We will seize control of the JAL flight from Tokyo to Berlin, divert it to Lawndale and blow up a nuclear device as the plane flies over the football field." The Imam turned to Akbar el-Salaam, a grungy Palestinian in combat fatigues, and said, "Brother Akbar, it is Allah's will that you carry out this mission. You will leave on the next flight to Tokyo in about an hour. ALLAH AKBAR!" The cries of "ALLAH AKBAR!" were repeated twenty times running. He can still remember it all like it was just yesterday. It was one of those memories you can't really shake off. He was on patrol in the Sea of Japan, off the coast of Sakhalin Island. He was squadron leader for a flight of five F-4EJ Phantom II jet fighters for the Japan Air Self Defense Force. The Phantom jets were showing their age but were still a reliable part of the force. So far, it had been a pretty routine patrol. Suddenly, one of the pilots radioed him: "Maverick to Dragon, I've picked up something on the radar. It looks like a Soviet Su-17." Dragon was the squadron leader's code name. "Roger, Maverick," responded the squadron leader; "let's take a look. As long as they're on their side of the border, we shouldn't expect any hostilities." "Roger, Dragon.", replied the first pilot. The squadron approached the location of the Su-17. However, it turned out that this was no ordinary patrol. A Korean Airlines 747 had somehow entered Soviet airspace. An international incident was in the making. "Dragon to Ginzu, find out what the Hell's going on here!," said the squadron leader to another pilot. The second pilot replied, "Ginzu to Dragon, I've got them fixed on radar. I do know some Russian. The MiG's issuing a warning to the KAL craft to clear out of Soviet space. He's threatening to fire." Was it time to take action? Every member of the SDF had been instructed from day one that Article 9 of the Constitution clearly stated that Japan was not to wage war. But now everyone in the squad faced a dilemma: Do nothing and see hundreds perish, or attack and risk international condemnation if they were wrong? "Ginzu," the squadron leader ordered, "inform the MiG pilot that if he fires weapons, our government will file a protest with the United Nations." Tense moments passed. "Dragon, he's ignoring me," was the second pilot's reply. The next thing everyone saw was that the Su-17 fired an air-to-air missile, blowing the KAL plane out of existence! "This is Dragon to all units! Return to base!," sharply ordered the squadron leader. "We don't want to risk a dogfight with the Su-17!" Clearly as much as everyone wanted to avenge what they had just seen, Article 9 was to be honored at all times. When they had landed back at the base, news had already reached everyone about what happened. An airman approached the squad leader and handed him a list. "Lieutenant Torymura, you may want to see this; it's the list of passengers," the airman said to him. He took a quick look, and his stomach turned when he noticed two names on the list. "Poor Makoto," was all he said. A subsequent investigation cleared Lt. Torymura and his squadron of negligence. Now a general, Torymura Keiichi was in charge of the Neo-Zero project. He sat there at his desk, in his dress green uniform, his hair grayed with the cares of a long military career and time-carved wrinkles over his skin. But he's still haunted by the awful memories of what happened fifteen years ago. If only he-- A knock on the door interrupted his train of thought. Someone entered his office. It was Ryu, now wearing a vermilion martial artist's outfit. "General, this is Special Agent Chang," he said. "I know when the NIRAA will attempt to steal the prototype." By Japanese standards, this was a rather brash way to start a campaign in a by-election. Streamers were all over the banquet hall, as well as posters, all with the same slogan: "Nagai Kenji: For a New and Better Japan." Nagai was already governor of Tokyo Metropolitan Prefecture; he had stunned everyone at the last gubernatorial election by winning the post running as a member of the Komeito, or Clean Government Party, which had the backing of the Soka Gakki sect of Buddhism. Now, he was in the most ambitious campaign of his life: he was seeking the vacant seat for Tokyo-to in the House of Representatives, the lower house of the Japanese Diet. His youthful looks belied his 45 years, and was wearing a gray flannel suit. Nagai stepped up to the podium and spoke: "Ladies and gentlemen: I hereby announce my candidacy for the Komeito nomination for the empty seat in the House of Representatives for Tokyo-to. Our nation faces grave problems as we near the new millennium. Business as usual in our government--fostered by a Liberal Democratic government that has been in control for over forty years--has led us to this crisis. We have been the envy of East Asia--indeed in what is still called the Third World--for turning so rapidly from an isolated, backwards nation to one of the most modern, most technologically advanced societies ever seen in human history. It would be a shame that we, as a beacon of hope to those less developed, be extinguished ourselves. We need new voices; we need fresh blood; we need to admit our mistakes of the past; we must lend a hand to those nations less fortunate than ourselves. Reforms must be made in our economy so that everyone that benefits can still do and even include the small minority that do not. We must be more open and honest in trade with our international neighbors. We must turn Japan around before it's too late, and I am the man to do it!" The crowd roared its approval. Lawndale was just one of your typical suburban American communities. At one rather well-appointed house lived the Morgendorffers. It was just after dinner and eldest daughter Daria had just went to her room; it was pretty unusual because its walls were mostly padded, a holdover from the previous owners, who kept their crazy aunt in there. Posters of a bleached skeleton in the desert and of exetensionalist author Franz Kafka adorned the walls. Daria had just logged on the Internet. Jane Lane, Daria's best friend, was sitting on Daria's bed. "You've got mail!," chirped the computer. "And you've got a stick up your ass!," quipped Daria in reply. Jane snickered and then spat out, "That was a good one, Daria! You go, girl!" Daria looked at her e-mail messages. Some of it was spam for hair tonic, get-rich-quick schemes, and pornography. There even was one sick individual who wanted a downloadable picture of Daria in her underwear. "That pervert!," Daria stated, " Who does he think I am, Linda Lovelace?" Jane shot back, "He probably confused you for some porno star." "Look at this one, Jane," said Daria in amazement. "Who's it from?," Jane inquired. Daria responded, "It's from my friend in Japan, Ami." "What does it say?," Jane wanted to know. Daria began to read it: "It says: 'Come here quickly. This is important. I can't tell you here. I'll explain everything when you arrive.'" "Better be careful, Daria," cautioned Jane, "Sometimes these Internet-initiated face-to-face meetings get kinky." Daria replied, "Jane, Ami is not some pervert. We're both smart; we're both unappreciated with our classmates, and we both have to put up with geeks." "You mean Japan has its own version of Upchuck?," said Jane in amazement. "Yep. His name is Gurio," Daria said; "The sick part is he's got a rather pretty, good-natured girlfriend named Naru." "Better call 'Sick Sad World' and tell them you've got a scoop for them!," snickered Jane. "Well, we'd better tell Mom and Dad about this," stated Daria. The entire Morgendorffer family was gathered in the living room. Jake and Helen, Daria's parents, were on the couch while Daria, Jane and Quinn, Daria's sister, were on another couch next to the adjacent wall. Quinn was wearing that stupid smiley face T-shirt and her red miniskirt she once wore to seduce Kevin Thompson, the star quarterback for Lawndale High. "Quinn, if that skirt had a slit in it, people would compare you Ashley Judd," Daria said. "Daria! Give me a break!," Quinn replied. "Anyway, your friend Ami wants you to go see her in Tokyo right away, Daria?", Helen asked. "Yes, she did, Mom," was Daria's response. "This is rather unusual, Daria," said Helen in concern; "You'll miss the big game against Highland." "Oh, whoopee!," shot back Daria; "I'll just miss my old nemeses Beavis and Butt-Head. I hated it when those two called me 'Diarrhea, cha-cha-cha!'". "Oh, Daria, boys will be boys!," Jake answered. "Heck, I probably didn't do any worse than they did when I was their age." "Jake, how dare you defend those two!," Helen roared. "Those two are so perverted they make Larry Flint look like Mahatma Gandhi!" "But, Honey--," began Jake Helen silenced him by roaring, "SHUT UP, JAKE!" "Yes, Dear!," was Jake's meekish reply. "Well, I guess if it's OK with the school," Helen said, "it's OK with me. I always thought going to foreign countries helps to broaden one's horizons." "I think there's an opening in our foreign exchange program, Mom. I'll ask," Daria replied. "Oh, Honey, you're going to like this!," Helen said. "Then again, I could live to regret it," warned Daria. "What will happen if Beavis and Butt-Head notice that you're not at the game? They'll pick on me! What will I do?," Quinn shrieked. "Keep your legs crossed," Daria sneered. Jane snickered sinisterly over that remark. At an underground bunker right beneath the Lawndale Gun Club, the Lawndale Militia was meeting. Anthony Corlew, the commander, rose to speak. "Gee, Commander, what are we going to do tonight?", asked a member named Poindexter. "The same thing we do every night, Poindexter: Try to take over Lawndale!," said Anthony. With that out of the way, he continued: "'Operation In Your Face' is proceeding as scheduled. As everyone knows, the whole town will turn out for the big game against Highland. During that time, we will launch a blitzkrieg attack and take over city hall, the police station and the courthouse. We will strike at half-time. We've got all our firepower ready. In four days, Lawndale will be ours!" Roars of approval echoed throughout the bunker. Nakajimi Tetsuo was going down a street in Shinjuku. He was about five and a half feet tall with raven black hair and wore a dark blue suit. He had a good job as a stockbroker, but visions of a terrible past still haunted him: "We are the Mecha-Dominion! We will absorb your world into our realm! Rebellion against us is useless!" Then the screams of slaughter. But now a new, more terrible vision filled his mind. A jet fighter coming out of nowhere. Missiles firing at landmark buildings. Fire everywhere. Bodies scattered in every direction. Tetsuo stopped. "Tokyo is in danger!," he exclaimed. Data 2: Ms. Morgendorffer Goes to Tokyo Lawndale International Airport was kind of lonely at this time of day. Except for a few Hare Krishnas here and there, not too many people were in the lobby. "Now, Daria, did you pack some clean underwear like I asked you to?," Helen asked. "Yes, Mother," Daria answered "Daria," Quinn asked, "Could you bring back one of those kimonos for me, please?" "Quinn," Daria stated, those kimonos are pretty damn expensive." "Pretty please?," Quinn whined. "C'mon, Daria," Jake said, "this is probably going to be the only time you'll ever get to go to Japan." "OK, OK," Daria said, resignedly; "if I see one at a reasonable price, I'll get one for you." "Thanks, Daria!," chirped Quinn Besides Daria and her family, there was Jane, and the only two friends in Lawndale High School they had, Jodie Landon and Michael Jordan Mackenzie, or Mack for short. "If there's any airheads at the high school you're going to, Daria, heckle them for me," Jane said. "And see if they've got a Japanese version of 'Sick Sad World' over there." "Right," responded Daria. "Have a nice time over there," Jodie added. "Let me know what you think of the sushi." ""I've got a cousin at an American base not too far from Tokyo. Maybe you can look him up," Mack said as he gave Daria a slip of paper. "I'll try my best, Mack," Daria answered. The airport PA system announced that the flight to Tokyo would soon be boarding. "You'd better get on board, Daria," Helen said. "Right," Daria said. " Bye, everyone. I'll write often." With that Daria hugged her family and friends, and went down the gate. "Man, I really envy Daria right now," Quinn said. "She's going to Japan and I have to go to the big game in three days and put up with Beavis and Butt-Head." As if there couldn't be anyone dumber than those two, Kevin Thompson, the star quarterback for Lawndale High, and his girlfriend, head cheerleader Brittany Taylor, appeared. Kevin was wearing his football uniform (which he wore everywhere) while Brittany was in her cheerleader uniform, which showed how well endowed (and stupid) she was. "Hey, what's up, everyone?," Brittany asked as she twirled her hair around her finger. "Daria just left for Japan," Jake said. "Hey, I hear Japan's a pretty cool country," Kevin said. "But not as cool as you, Kevin," gushed Brittany as she hugged Kevin. "Aw, gee, Cupcake!," Kevin replied. "Anyway, when's the next drill, Mack Daddy?" "Kevin," Mack said, "For the last time, don't call me 'Mack Daddy'! I hate that name!" "OOPS! Sorry!", Kevin gasped. Narita Airport (or New Tokyo International Airport, as it was officially known) was hopping when Daria arrived. Already jet lag was taking its toll on her. She looked like she'd been through a war. "They're right," Daria muttered to herself, "Airline food is lousy!" She did look disheveled. She didn't sleep too well on the flight. Her hair was a wreck, her olive drab jacket was scrunched up, her black skirt was hiked up, and one of the laces on her combat boots was untied. Just then, she walked right into someone. "A thousand pardons to you, Madam!," said the stranger. "Up yours!," Daria yelled back. Daria didn't know it, but she bumped into the person who was going to nuke Lawndale in three days time. Akbar went up to a rent-a-car counter and rented a Toyota Corolla 2-door. He then went to a pay phone to book a room at a nearby motel. "In three days time," Akbar said to himself, "The Great Satan will have his war brought home to him!" Daria, meanwhile, was surprised to see a chauffeur standing with a card that said "Morgendorffer" on it. "Are you Ms. Daria Morgendorffer?," asked the chauffeur. "Yes, and who might you be, the welcoming committee from Hell?" "Your sense of humor is sharp," the chauffeur said, "but I was sent at the request of Mizuno Ami, your friend. She told me to take you directly to Sendai Hill Shrine. It was important." "Lead the way," Daria said. "Things couldn't get much worse. After all, the food was lousy, and I didn't sleep well at all." "Right this way," the chauffeur said. "Ami," Hino Rei, the miko of Sendai Hill Shrine began to say, "you'd better have a good reason why you asked all of us to be here right now! You interrupted me right in the middle of shrine services!" "This won't take long," Ami promised. "As you know, in three days, I leave for Germany. However, the Sailor Senshi won't be undermanned. I got someone coming who will take my place while I'm gone." "This better be worth it," Kino Makoto added, "since the last time you were planning to go to Germany, you changed your mind at the last minute." "Yeah," Usagi added, "and Mamoru had dumped me!" "AHEM!," Mamoru cleared his throat. "OOPS! Sorry!," Usagi gasped. "I'm pretty sure that the person you will meet will live up to everyone's expectations," Artemis said. "Ami said that she was as smart as she is." "Great," moaned Aino Minako, "another egghead who prefers curling up with a good book instead of going to the movies with a guy! Don't eggheads like you have lives, Ami?" "And what do you mean by that remark, Minako?," Ami demanded. "Now, now, ladies," Luna said, "Let's not get hot under the collar! I'm pretty sure all will work out for the best." Just then, Daria arrived. She introduced herself rather curtly: "Hello. My name is Daria Morgendorffer. I'm from Lawndale, USA. I just had one Hell of a flight, my stomach's upset from the airline food, I didn't sleep well, and I've got a short temper. So let's cut the crap and get down to business." Usagi swallowed with a loud "ULP!" Ami knew she had to defuse the situation quickly. "Well, Daria, I'm sorry that your flight didn't go too well," Ami began to say; "Please, let me introduce you to my friends. The one with the long blonde ponytails is Tsukino Usagi. The black-haired lady in the white robe and red hakama is Hino Rei, the miko of this shrine. The girl with the auburn ponytail is Kino Makoto. The other blonde with the bow in her hair is Aino Minako. The girl with long dark green hair is Meiou Setsuna. The one with the short, dirty blond hair is Ten'ou Haruka. The girl with the green hair is Kaiou Michiru. The lady with the short black hair is Tomoe Horatu. The little girl with pink hair is Chibi-Usa. The guy with black hair is Chiba Mamoru. The black cat is Luna, and the white one is Artemis." A less-than-enthusiastic "Hello" issued from everyone. "I see this is going to be a tough crowd," Daria said. "OK, Usagi," Ami said, "I guess you should let Daria know our secret." Usagi drew a deep breath and began: "Daria, what if I told you that everything is not as it seems here?" "You dragged me all the way here to tell me something I already know?," shot back Daria, sarcastically. "What a gyp!" "Trust me on this one," Usagi continued, "what if I told you that a thousand years ago we all lived on the Moon as members of the Royal Court of the Moon Kingdom?" Daria groaned, "Beam me up, Scotty, this planet is going to Hell in a handbasket!" "C'mon, Daria, I'm being serious here!," continued Usagi; "You see, a thousand years ago Queen Beryl and her Dark Kingdom destroyed the Moon Kingdom and my mother, Queen Serenity. We were sent to Earth and reincarnated so we could protect the Earth from the Dark Kingdom and all other threats. We defeated the Dark Kingdom, Ail and Ann, the Wiseman and the Four Sisters, the Death Busters, the Black Moon Circus, and--most recently--Sailor Galaxia. You see, we are the Sailor Senshi you may have heard about in the news. I'm Sailor Moon; Ami's Sailor Mercury; Rei's Sailor Mars; Mako's Sailor Jupiter; Minako's Sailor Venus; Chibi-Usa's Sailor Chibi-Moon; Setsuna's Sailor Pluto; Haruka's Sailor Uranus; Michiru's Sailor Neptune; Hotaru's Sailor Saturn; Mamoru's Tuxedo Mask, and Luna and Artemis can talk." Daria began to sarcastically hum the theme from "The Twilight Zone". "Daria," Luna said, "I will not allow you to act sarcastically! That is not the proper way for a Sailor Senshi to behave! This is a serious situation you're in. Let Ami explain." "Daria," Ami said "as you know, I have to leave for my medical studies in Germany in three days. Someone has to take my place as Sailor Mercury while I'm gone. I think you're the best person there is." Daria shot back, "First, you cook up some cockamamie story about being recreated from some Moon Kingdom, now I have talking cats to deal with. Is this 'Candid Camera', and if so, where's Allan Funt?" "Daria," Luna replied, "believe me, I know this is kind of difficult for you to take, but at first we didn't know if this would be feasible, since you weren't around during the Silver Millennium. But I think it can be done. Ami, give me your power stick." Ami handed it to Luna; she then gave it to Daria. Luna continued, "Now, the both of you hold on to my tail". They both did, and Ami's Sailor Mercury powers left her and entered Daria. "I didn't notice a damn difference," sneered Daria. "Now, hold the power stick up high and say 'SUPER MERCURY STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!,'" said Luna. "OK, but I don't think anything is going to happen," was Daria's curt reply. Daria held the power stick like it was some moldy breadstick the local pizzeria back at Lawndale was giving away, and said "SUPER MERCURY STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!". Immediately, Daria had the sensation that someone had ripped her clothes off. "Great, now the whole damn world can see I've got small breasts!", she muttered to herself. As soon as the transformation was complete, and Daria was in Sailor Mercury's seirafuku costume, everyone knew that the transfer was successful. "Congratulations, Daria! You're now the new Sailor Mercury!," Usagi blushed. She motioned Daria to a nearby mirror. Daria took one look. "I hate this seirafuku," Daria replied; "it looks frumpy on me! I want something else!" "Daria," Luna said, "this is the uniform of the Sailor Senshi. Wear it with pride." Daria stepped on Luna's tail in response; Luna gave out a loud "ROWR!". "UP YOURS!," Daria bickered. "I don't think Daria's going to be a good team member, Mamoru," whined Usagi. "I couldn't agree with you more, Usagi," conceded Mamoru.. Hamada Ieyasu was just a typical person living in a quiet street in a suburb of Narita. That is, he would be typical except for one thing: he had a working-order Kawasaki Ki-45 Toryu night fighter/ground attack aircraft in his backyard. He had a long, gray, tapered Fu Manchu beard and was greasy from his work. He wore a soft cap and a velvet jacket. He was doing some routine maintenance on it when his grandson Hideki asked him about the plane. "You're pretty proud of that airplane, aren't you, Grandpa?," began Hideki. Ieyasu began to tell him about the plane: "Yes I am, Hideki. I may have flown it in a losing cause, but it served me well. I was just lucky that I managed to salvage parts for it and rebuild it; after the way, the American occupation forces scrapped most of our nation's war capabilities. Remember, back then, we and the United States were not on the best of terms. Ruthless military men had virtual control of our nation in name if not in fact. They had launched a foolhardy quest to annex much of East Asia to our territory and committed many atrocities. This plane was one of the best craft ever built. Did you know that it was this plane, and not the Mitsubishi A6M that made the first Kamikaze attack on American naval vessels? The Americans called this plane the 'Nick' like the A6M was called the 'Zero'." Ieyasu paused to go toward the tail of the Nick. He continued: "You may notice that the Rising Sun is on a white stripe on this plane. That meant that this plane was serving in the defense of the homeland. And the marking of the tail indicates that it was with the 1st Chutai of the 53rd Sentai based in Matsudo here in Chiba-ken." Hideki asked, "What was your greatest adventure in this plane?" "Well, one time," Ieyasu answered, "shortly before the atomic bomb was dropped on Hiroshima, we went up against the Americans and their Superfortresses on one of their raids against Tokyo. I managed to shoot down three that night. However, my tailgunner was killed when a fourth retaliated after we bungled an attempt to shoot that one down. I was lucky to escape with my life." Ieyasu then added this rather suddenly: "You know, Hideki, I wonder how things might have been different if the military hadn't slowly crept into power and we didn't join the Nazi Germans and the Fascist Italians. We might have joined the Americans and together forced both of them to surrender sooner that they did. We might have launched a campaign to expel the Germans from the Soviet Union. We might have gone into Berlin instead of the Soviets. What I don't figure is why both our government and the American government won't just own up to what happened. They say the Americans should apologize for using the atomic bomb but why won't our government apologize for the Rape of Nanjing or the Korean comfort women or the Baatan Death March when most of its citizens are indeed sorry for those things. Why can't both our nations admit that mistakes were made by everyone, make a commitment to make sure nothing like this ever happens again, and get on with our lives? Why is it that the people know better than our elected leaders?" "Beats me, Grandpa," said an astonished Hideki; "I guess adults aren't better than us kids." Ieyasu got a good laugh over that. "Grandma should be ready with dinner soon," he said. "You'd better go in and set the table. I'll have this plane ready for the Narita Air Show by the end of the week, or I'll eat my hat. And tell your father when he and your mother come to pick you up that I hope he'll make it this year. This old bird's gonna win the Grand Prize this year, or I'll have to commit seppuku." "You wouldn't!," said an alarmed Hideki. "Just kidding, Hideki," reassured Ieyasu. Dr. Vander Helffen was at his office. He was poring over his latest plans to hijack the Neo-Zero prototype when Yoriko arrived. "Time for your pill again, Yoriko," he said. She took a bottle marked "Hi no Tori" Immortality Pills and ingested one of them. "Now, on to business, Yoriko," he continued. "I have grave concerns for Ryu." "How so?," Yoriko wanted to know. Dr. Vander Helffen replied, "Our ninja spies have seen him hanging around with known SDF intelligence agents in the Ginza." He proceeded to take some photographs out of a manila envelope. "So, I see," was her reply. "If Ryu is indeed acting as a double agent, he is to be eliminated," Dr. Vander Helffen stated. "We're tailing him now, even as we speak. If he is working for the SDF behind our backs, give the kill order." "Understood, Dr. Vander Helffen," replied Yoriko. Gen. Torymura had gotten the full report from Ryu of the NIRAA's plot to steal the Neo-Zero prototype, and now he was ready to take action. "This is serious," he began; "If the NIRAA seizes the prototype, nothing in the SDF arsenal can stop it. We will need to get some additional help. If the rumors are true about what I heard about the Sailor Senshi, they may be our only hope against the NIRAA." "I think I know someone who can contact them;" replied Ryu. "His name is Chiba Mamoru. He's in the self- defense class I teach at the Morita Dojo. If what I suspect of him is true, I can get the Sailor Senshi on our side." "Proceed," ordered Gen. Torymura. "The fate of Japan rests on your shoulders, Ryu." Ryu departed, not noticing that the receptionist had overheard everything that had happened. She was an NIRAA ninja spy, and was now sending a secret message by a secret relaying device to NIRAA headquarters. "Japan Air Lines, how may I help you?," asked a ticket agent on the phone Akbar was ordering his ticket.. "This is Akbar el-Salaam," he began; "I would like to book a seat on the Saturday flight from Narita to Berlin." Luckily for Akbar, this was his first hijacking, and there would be no record of him by any of the aviation or law enforcement authorities on file. Until now, Akbar had been content with the occasional strafing of Jewish settlements in East Jerusalem and throwing rocks at Israeli troops. Now he was in the big leagues. "What class?," the agent asked. Akbar answered, "First class." The agent replied, "Smoking or non-smoking?" "I thought all flights were now non-smoking," inquired Akbar. "That's only for United States airlines, sir," replied the agent. "Non-smoking," answered Akbar. "OK," the agent said; "you can pick up your ticket at the gate on the morning of departure. Thanks you for flying Japan Air Lines, and have a nice flight." "It will be nice all right," Akbar sneered as he hung up the phone. "My destination will be with Allah in Paradise." Gov. Nagai was holding a rally at the Ginza, Tokyo's entertainment district. There was a huge crowd. PA speakers were everywhere, as well as streamers and signs. Nagai was making a speech where it seemed he'd promise sushi in everyone's heated dinner table or a full rice cooker if that would make Japan prosperous again. "My friends," Gov. Nagai began, "we can make Japan better than it is now. We just need the courage to take the difficult steps that need to be taken. Let us go forward with that vision." Tetsuo was going down the street and noticed the rally. He then looked at a balcony across the street. He noticed something sinister going on. A man dressed entirely in black was setting up a high-powered rifle. He was going to assassinate Gov. Nagai! Quickly, Tetsuo ran to a nearby alley. He raised his hands as in supplication to the sun. "Amaterasu-Omikami, give thee thy mortal servant the power of the Solar Warrior!," he shouted. Instantly it seemed that Tetsuo was engulfed in flames, and a transformation took place. He emerged in red robotic armor with a yellow sunburst on the chest. He leapt up to the balcony. "Miscreant!," he yelled; "Stop where you are! I am the Solar Warrior, servant to Amaterasu-Omikami, Goddess of the Sun! In the name of the Sun, you will be judged!" The assassin growled and fired, but the bullets ricocheted off the armor. The Solar Warrior then yelled, "SOLAR FLARE DISCHARGE ATTACK!" Two discs, one on each gauntlet, glowed, then discharged. The assassin was incinerated. The crowd saw what happened. They had just realized that this mystery hero had just saved Gov. Nagai from certain death. The Solar Warrior disappeared, leaving a cheering crowd shouting "BANZAI!" behind. "Find this person," Gov. Nagai said to one of his aides. "I might have a position for him in my campaign." Ami was just finishing packing up for her trip. In just three days, she was off to Berlin. "Think you might want this, Honey?," a voice said as it entered the room. It was Ami's mother. Ami turned around and saw her old teddy bear. "Mom, I don't need that teddy bear," said an embarrassed Ami; "Really!" "It was always your good luck charm," continued her mother. "I want you to do well over there in Germany. I want you to make your father and me proud. I can't believe you're going away in three days." "I'll miss you, Mom," said Ami, "but I'll e-mail you and all my friends and family every week. I promise." Ami finished packing., then said, "I'd better get to bed." "Good night, Ami," her mother said. Ami then took off her clothes and her bra. She stood next to the open window and felt the cool evening wind against her face and breasts. It felt so good after such a hot late summer's day. She stood like that for a few minutes, then slipped on her nightshirt, a football jersey-looking blue shirt with a white "15" on it, and went to bed. Mizuno Ami didn't know then what Hell she was going to go through. Data 3: Enter Sailor Misery Chick The mansion that Ami was living in was pretty spacious, by Japanese standards. Ami woke up, flung off her nightshirt, and took a good look at herself in the mirror. For an egghead, she had quite an attractive body, even if she was small-breasted. Daria had settled in the next room, which was used as a guest room. Ami took off her panties, put on her robe, and went to the bathroom. As she was soaping herself up in the shower, Ami thought about everything that had gone on for the past five years or so. It had it horrifying moments as well as its triumphs, but now it seemed she was going to put this behind her for at least the next four years or so. As she stepped out of the shower again, she looked at herself again. Maybe Minako was right: she should cut loose once in a while. Maybe before she leaves, she should go out with some guy; she had a new blouse and miniskirt combo that she was dying to try out. As she put her robe on again and stepped out of the bathroom, Daria was waiting to enter. She looked beady-eyed without her eyeglasses, and was wearing a T-shirt and shorts as nightwear. "Had a good sleep, Daria?," Ami asked. "OK, but I still have major jet lag," replied Daria. "You'll get used to it," answered Ami; "By the way, I hope you adjusted your watch properly; remember, Japan does not observe Daylight Savings Time like you do back in the United States." "So I've heard," said Daria. "When do we leave for our first class?" "Soon," was Ami's reply. "And I hope you will wear the seifuku I gave you; it's our school uniform." "I still say it looks stupid on me," shot back Daria. Ami asked her, "Daria, do you actually wear those army fatigues, black skirt and combat boots to school back home?" "Yes, I do," Daria said. "It sends a message." "What message is that?," Ami wanted to know. Daria replied, "That I may be feminine, but I'm also tough as nails." "If you ever go out on the town," Ami continued, "there's some very good drop-dead minidresses I have that would look very good on you. And, by the way, have you ever considered wearing contact lenses?" "Too much trouble keeping them clean," replied Daria. "Other than that, you do look beautiful," replied Ami admiringly. "Thanks;" said a surprised Daria; "it's not everyday somebody says that about me. They usually call me 'The Misery Chick.'" "Well, I guess we'd better get the lead out and get dressed for school," stated Ami. "Right," responded Daria. "I hope you didn't use all the hot water." "There should be some left," said Ami, somehow unsure of herself. However, as Daria began to use the shower, she was greeted with a blast of Arctic-cold water. "That's the story of my life," she said. As they arrived for their first class, Ami and Daria noticed that Usagi was going to be late again. "What else is new," sneered Osaka Naru, whose mother ran a jewelry store. "Usagi is always late. She's like that school girl Magami Eiko on 'Project A-ko'. She always wakes up late for school, rushes like a maniac and still winds up being late for her first class. If only she had superhuman strength, superhuman speed and had Kotobuki Shiko in tow, as well as long-flowing red hair, the image would be perfect." "I've seen every film in that series," boasted Umino Gurio, the geeky guy who was Naru's boyfriend. "A-ko, B-ko and C-ko are real funny!" "And you must be 'The Upchuck of Japan!,'" sneered Daria. "What's an 'Upchuck?,'" Gurio asked. "Nevermind," replied Daria. Ms. Sakurada Haruna, who was the English teacher, stepped in the room. She noticed that it was time to start class. "Oh, that Usagi's going to be late again, as usual, I see," began Ms. Sakurada. "Well, that hasn't stopped me before. Shall we begin class? We've got a new student here today who will take Ami's place after she leaves for her medical studies in Germany. Care to introduce yourself?" Daria stepped up to the front of the room. "My name's Daria Morgendorffer," she began. "I'm from Lawndale High School on a foreign exchange program. I hope that I will do well in your school and not be treated like an outcast like I am back home." She bowed and resumed her seat. "Well, that was short and sweet," Ms. Sakurada responded. Suddenly, Usagi bolted into the room. "Sorry I'm late, Ms. S! The bus was late!," was Usagi's rather pathetic reply. "Usagi, you are so pathetic," shot back Ms. Sakurada. "You will wait outside in the hallway until class is over, then you and I are going to have a little talk in my office, young lady!" "Does this happen every time?," Daria asked Ami. "I'm afraid so," Ami answered. Later that day, school had let out for the day. All of the Sailor Senshi were going down the street, chatting girl talk. "So, Ami, do you want a big going-away party before you leave, or what?," Usagi asked. "Usagi, please don't make a big deal about it," pleaded Ami; "I'll get a chance to see you during such times as inter-semester breaks, holidays and such. Besides, I've never felt comfortable about going-away parties." "How do you feel about having the type of party like we have back home in the United States?," Daria asked. "I guess you've heard about the types of parties high school kids have on Friday and Saturday nights." "What do you mean?," Ami asked. Daria began her description: "Stale potato chips, warm beer, flat soda, loud heavy metal music, guys and gals making out--" "DON'T GO ON!," shrieked an embarrassed Ami. "Ami, your cheeks are blushing!," giggled Hotaru. "They are not!," roared Ami. Just then, shots were heard at a nearby Mitsubishi Bank branch, and two armed robbers were running at full speed. When they got near the building, they saw that a security officer was shot to death. "This looks like a job for the Sailor Senshi!," Usagi exclaimed. The Sailor Senshi began their transformation sequences: "ETERNAL MOON STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER CHIBI-MOON STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER MARS STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER JUPITER STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER VENUS STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER SATURN STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER URANUS STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER NEPTUNE STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER PLUTO STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" Each Sailor Senshi had underwent her transformation; now it was Daria's turn. "Here goes nothing!," she said. "SUPER MERCURY STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" Daria was soon transformed into Sailor Mercury. "Daria, activate your VR equipment and track down the robbers," Ami instructed. A blue visor appeared on Daria. She was soon getting a reading. "They went that way," Daria said. "All right, then, let's move it!", said Sailor Moon, who was in her Eternal Mode, with wings. She flew ahead of them. The robbers, meanwhile, had a couple of Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department officers on their tail. "Halt, in the name of the law!," one of the officers roared. "Eat lead, copper!," roared one of the crooks back. He took a gun and shot the cop down. The other cop went to help him. He took his portable radio and said, "Officer down! Officer down!" "You're next, blue pig!," said the other crook as he put his .45 Magnum against his temple. "Hold it right there, crooks!," said a nearby voice. "I am the pretty soldier Eternal Sailor Moon, champion of love and justice. And these are the Sailor Senshi. In place of the Moon, we will punish you!" Each of the other Sailor Senshi made her introductory speeches as well. It was now time for Daria to make hers: "I am Sailor Mercury, Misery Chick of Justice! In the name of Mercury, I'm going to nag you to death!" "What the Hell. . ." Sailor Moon found herself saying. But there was no time to waste. "Eat lead, Sailor Senshi!," yelled the first crook. Just then, a red rose dart hit the ground. "You shoot, and it will be the last thing you ever do," Tuxedo Mask said as he stepped out of the shadows. "Here comes the calvary!," Daria said sarcastically. Recently, the Sailor Senshi had been given some new powers, and now they were going to be put to the test. Sailor Moon was going to be first. She yelled, "MOON THUNDER PUNCH!" With that, she threw her fist, and it knocked both crooks off their feet. Sailor Venus was next. "SUPER VENUS BLINDSIDER ATTACK!," she screamed. With that a blinding light issued from her hands, temporarily blinding the crooks. Daria was still new at this, so she decided to use one of Sailor Mercury's old powers. She shouted, "SHABON SPRAY. . .FREEZING!" The crooks were frozen solid. "Hmmm, just like in 'Duke Nukem 3D'!," she quipped. Then, she went up to them, and kicked them. They shattered into little pieces. "Your face, your ass, what's the difference!," she sneered. The rest of the Sailor Senshi stood in disbelief, with their mouths wide open. Later, back at Sendai Hill Shrine, Daria was being reprimanded for her actions. "Daria," Usagi began, "what you did was highly inappropriate! Sailor Senshi don't act that way!" "Usagi's right," Luna added. "You have to stop acting sarcastically! You're just lucky the TMPD decided that the use of deadly force was justified in the case." "Next time, you may not be so lucky!," Artemis said. "You know," Daria replied, "all of you should go take a hike!" With that, Daria stormed away. "I'm beginning to think that Ami made a big mistake asking Daria to take her place, Luna," Usagi said. "Right now, we're stuck with her," Luna replied; "Ami's leaving for Germany the day after tomorrow, so there's nothing much else we can do for now." "I just hope she can keep her temper in check, that's all," Usagi said resignedly. Gov. Nagai was holding another rally, this time at the foot of Tokyo Tower. Another huge crowd had gathered, and they were shouting "NAGAI! NAGAI! NAGAI!", awaiting for the arrival of the candidate. In a nearby trailer, Gov. Nagai was speaking to the Solar Warrior, whom he managed to locate shortly after he saved his life. "Believe me, Solar Warrior," Gov. Nagai began, "I'm making a generous offer. Besides, if I'm elected and my proposal goes through, you could find yourself in a good position in government." "My allegiance is with Amaterasu-Omikami," responded the Solar Warrior. "I have served her for untold millennia, back when there was no Japan as we know it. You must understand that I serve my goddess first, then my nation." "Of course," Gov. Nagai said. "The Americans have a saying for that: 'For God and Country.' Far be it from me to tell you to quit the employ of your mistress. All I'm asking is for you to head this agency I'm proposing. If all goes well, we'll make the best law enforcement apparatus in the world even better." "Very well," said the Solar Warrior. "If it will serve to advance both my faith and my nation, so be it." "I'm glad to see we're at agreement," Gov. Nagai said, relieved. "Might as well tell my adoring public about this." Gov. Nagai, the Solar Warrior and the entire campaign staff stepped out of the trailer and onto the platform set up for the occasion. Stepping up to the podium, Gov. Nagai began to speak: "My friends, I have someone here you may be familiar with. This is the brave hero who stopped the assassin who was determined to end my life yesterday. He calls himself the Solar Warrior. I owe my life to this person, and there's only one way I can pay him back. I've decided to name him as my chief of security during my campaign. He deserves this honor." "Further, I hereby announce that if I am elected, one of the first things I plan to introduce in the Diet is a bill creating a new Agency of Superhuman Activity Co-Ordination. Such an agency would help the various superhumans and superhuman groups work together with our local and national police forces to help stop some of the bigger threats to our well-being and safety. We already have one of the lowest crime rates in the world; this will ensure that it stays that way." The crowd cheered loudly. Shouts of "NAGAI!", "BANZAI!", and "SOLAR WARRIOR!" filled the air as Gov. Nagai and the rest of his campaign staff--the Solar Warrior included--left for campaign headquarters. Ryu had made his way to Azabu-ku, where his friend Mamoru lived in a rather well-appointed apartment. He rang the doorbell and waited a few seconds. "Ryu? What brings you here?," Mamoru asked. "Is there anyone else here with you?," Ryu responded. "No," said Mamoru. "Good," Ryu replied as he stepped inside. "What I have to tell you is not to leave this room. I am actually an agent for the Japanese Special Intelligence Bureau. I've been working on a special assignment in regard to the activities of an organization called the New Imperial Rule Assistance Association. They're a extreme right-wing organization that wants to return Japan to its military-influenced wartime government. They plan to do so by stealing the prototype of the new Mitsubishi Neo-Zero Advanced Jet Fighter now being developed. They plan to use it to bomb Tokyo to rubble unless the civilian government hands over power to them. The SDF can't stop them alone, and neither can the JSIB. We were hoping that you can contact the Sailor Senshi for us; they may be our only hope." "How do I know that you're being on the level with me on this matter?," demanded Mamoru. "Because the JSIB has extensive knowledge of the Sailor Senshi's activities," said Ryu. "We've got files on every member back to their earliest childhood. If you're think we're joking, take a look at this." Ryu gave him a file with the name "CHIBA MAMORU" on it. He opened it up and looked at it. Sure enough, all of it was there: pictures of his parents; of the car wreck that killed them; of his days at the orphanage; of his activities as Tuxedo Mask; of his activities as Endymion when he was brainwashed to work for the Dark Kingdom; of his activities as Moonlight Knight; of his recent mysterious disappearance during a flight to the United States. It was all there. "How did you get these pictures?," demanded Mamoru. Ryu replied, "We have our ways, Mamoru. I have Usagi's file here as well." He pulled it out and began perusing it. "Did you know that when she was in kindergarten, she dumped a cup of chocolate pudding on her best friend Osaka Naru because she called her a 'dweeb'? Or that she can't stand carrots? Or that she's never really been able to figure you out?" Mamoru said curtly, "Oh, and I bet you have her bra size in there as well?" "Not even worth mentioning," dismissed Ryu. "You see, Mamoru, we've got the goods on all of you. This is a serious matter we're talking about here. Now, we need to know if the Sailor Senshi are on our side or not?" "Very well, you win," said Mamoru resignedly. "We'll help you in this matter. But I want those files destroyed. If they ever fall in the wrong hands, it could compromise our identities." "Consider it done, my friend," replied Ryu. "We will contact you when we feel that we need your assistance. Until then, take care." Ryu left the apartment building, but he didn't take even five steps when he turned around. Apparently, some NIRAA ninja spies had been following him; they were dressed in black and had katana blades, bo quarterstaffs, sais, nunchuckas and throwing stars. "You traitor!," said the leader of the group. "We should have suspected from the beginning that you were a double agent! We'll put an end to your miserable existence at once!" The ninja spies charged on him. Ryu stood his ground, then launched into a roundhouse kick that sent two of them crashing to the ground. Three more fell to blows to their solar plexus, and two more fell to blows to the neck. One more was left standing. He decided that discretion was the better part of valor, and ran. "Run like the coward you are!," Ryu shouted. He decided to report this matter to Gen. Torymura at once. Back at Lawndale, the high school football team was holding a scrimmage. The regular coach was sick with the flu, so Anthony DeMartino, the neurotic social studies teacher, was filling in for him. Mack was calling the next play: "34 red, 34 red, 45, 49, hike, hike!" Kevin was fading back for a pass, but then fumbled the ball. Mack could only groan in disappointment. "Kevin," Mr. DeMartino said as his right eye bulged in anger, "for a star quarterback, sometimes you play pathetically! How are we going to win the big game Saturday against Highland if you keep fumbling the ball?" "Sorry, Mr. DeMartino," replied Kevin, "but I keep being distracted seeing Brittany practicing her jumps over there." Sure enough, Brittany was indeed practicing her jumps; with the tight sweater she was wearing, her breasts were jiggling like crazy. Up in the stands sat Jane, Quinn, Jane's brother Trent, Jodie and Upchuck; his real name was Charles Ruttheimer, but since he was so perverted and geeky, he was called Upchuck. Quinn was expecting the other members of the Fashion Club to arrive shortly. "What a boring scrimmage!," Quinn started. "How are we going to win the game if we keep acting like a bunch of morons?" Upchuck went up to Quinn and said, "Why don't we go back to my place and have our own scrimmage? ROWR!" "Keep away from me, Upchuck!," shrieked Quinn. "I see not all of the morons are out on the field," Jane retorted. "Man, I can't believe Daria won't be here for this game," Trent said. "She never liked football, but she likes being here for the big game against Highland. She always likes to heckle Beavis and Butt-Head; it's the only time her two former classmates from Highland High School ever come to visit Lawndale every year. It's been that way since she moved here to Lawndale a couple of years back." "Well, you know what they say, Trent," Jane said, "'Absence makes the heart grow fonder.'" "Tell me about it," Trent said with a sigh. "Oh, look, here comes the Fashion Club!," Quinn chirped. Sandi, the club president, entered first followed by Stacy, the club secretary, and then Tiffany, the club treasurer. "Like, sorry we're late and all that," Sandi began to say, "but, like my cat pooped all over this outfit I'm wearing and I had to wash it up." "Stuff like that happens," Quinn said. "Hey, everything's all set for us to sell goodies at the game," Stacy said. "Tiffany and I have baked up a whole batch of cookies, brownies, cupcakes, and so forth." "But, UGH! I've got dishpan hands now!," whined Tiffany. "Like, just remember, Tiffany," Sandi said, "it's all for a good cause: the Fashion Club." "Why don't they give it to charity like Student Government does?," Jodie asked Jane. "They are a charity case," replied Jane, "They all need new brains, new personalities and ego deflation!" Jodie got a good snicker over that remark. Jesse Moreno, Trent's bandmate on the rock band Mystik Spiral, arrived. "Trent, man, it's all set!," he said. "What's all set, Jesse?," asked Trent. Jesse continued, "We're gonna sing the national anthem at the big game. I just spoke to Ms. Li, the principal, and she's promised to pay us $1000 for the gig." "And just where is Ms. Li going to get $1000 from," Quinn said. "The expenses for this game have already gone over budget!" "Yeah," Jane added, "and the last time this happened, the Board of Education and the school superintendent reprimanded her big time for wasting taxpayers' money. We're just lucky Bob Schulz didn't show up and sue the school district!" "Hey, where she gets the bread from don't matter to me, man," Trent said, "just as long as we get it." Meanwhile, another play was being run on the field. This time, Kevin made a perfect spiral pass. Mack snagged it and ran it down for a touchdown. "Now, that's what I like to see, people!," Mr. DeMartino said. Brittany saw that and shouted "YEAH! GO, GO LAWNDALE!" Just then, Jane thought she heard some familiar laughter: "HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH!" "Oh, no!," Jane said, "it can't be those two!" Sure enough, it was Beavis and Butt-Head. They went up in the stands. "Uh, Quinn, where's your sister, Diarrhea?," Butt-Head asked. "Yeah, like we want to talk to her and stuff," Beavis added. "Well, Daria isn't here today!," Quinn began; "she went over to Japan on a foreign exchange program." "Man, that sucks!," Beavis answered. "Listen, you two," Jane said, "all because Daria isn't here doesn't mean you can go pick on Quinn at the game on Saturday. If you do anything to her, I'll scratch your eyes out!" "Uh, like is that a threat or a promise?," Butt-Head asked. Jane said rather icily, "BOTH!" "WHOA!," Butt-Head said. Beavis and Butt-Head sat down and watched a few plays. Kevin was once again fumbling the ball. After a while, those two got bored. "This scrimmage sucks!," Beavis said. "Uh, let's liven things up a bit, Beavis!," Butt-Head responded. They soon got out two brown paper bags they had taken with them and pulled out some firecrackers. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!," Jane roared. "Uh, like we're going to set off firecrackers and stuff!," Butt-Head said; "What do you think we were going to do, asswipe?" They set off a whole string of them and tossed them onto the field. The whole team started to scatter. "HEH-HEH-HEH! See me toss this big one out there, Butt-Head!," Beavis said. He lit the fuse and tossed it out. It landed right on Kevin, and it went off in his left eye. Kevin collapsed in agony. "KEVIN!," shrieked Brittany, who saw the whole thing go down. She then fainted. Beavis and Butt-Head made good their escape while everyone was gathered around Kevin. "Someone call 911, dammit!," shrieked Mr. DeMartino. Kevin was taken to Lawndale General Hospital. An examination revealed that most of the explosion was absorbed by his helmet, and damage to his eye was negligible. His vision checked out OK, but he was held overnight for observation, and released the next day. At the next meeting of the Lawndale Militia, Anthony Corlew brought up the matter of the firecracker attack at the scrimmage: "Fellow comrades in arms, this is just another reason why we need to take over Lawndale. With our agenda of law and order, filth like Beavis and Butt-Head, as well as people of color and crippled folks, will be kept out of our community. We don't need white trash like those two ruining our town! When they return, we need to lynch them, to teach a lesson to Highland that we won't tolerate their shenanigans here in Lawndale!" Those in attendance cheered the speech. "I have failed you, Master!" With that, the only NIRAA ninja who escaped from Ryu (the others had been arrested) committed seppuku in front of Dr. Vander Helffen. Dr. Vander Helffen ordered the body disposed of. Yoriko entered the room. "What was that all about?," she asked. "Our attempt to kill Ryu failed," began Dr. Vander Helffen. "We sent some ninja spies to track him down, and he has alerted someone named Chiba Mamoru to our plans. They were going to kill Ryu, but he was too strong for them. I want you to personally kill Ryu." "Your orders will be obeyed, Dr. Vander Helffen," said Yoriko. Ryu had just returned to Gen Torymura and told him all about his meeting with Mamoru, as well as the attack by the NIRAA ninja spies. "They're on to us; I was afraid they would," Gen. Torymura said. "I'm going to order security tightened to the biggest extent possible immediately at the base where the prototype is being stored. When we do need the Sailor Senshi, they are to be briefed on this matter." "Everything will be done as you have ordered, General," answered Ryu. The day had arrived for Ami to leave for Germany. All the Sailor Senshi were with her at Narita Airport, as well as both her mother and her father. "Well, I guess this is it," Ami said. "Ami, you'll always be in our hearts," Usagi began to say. "When you do come back, you can always rejoin us. The door is always open." "Here, take this," Rei said. "It's a special 'Safe Journey' charm. I hope you have a safe flight." "I want you to make your mother and I very proud of you," said Ami's father. "I always knew in my heart that you are a very intelligent young lady." "As for you, Daria," Ami said, "Keep the home fires burning." "Mom told me never to play with matches," Daria said. "Still with your sarcastic humor, I see," Usagi said. "Ami, I hope you will be a success in your endeavors," Mamoru added. "We're all rooting for you." Ami couldn't hold it back anymore. The tears were beginning to flow. "I'm really going to miss you guys!," Ami sobbed, then hugged each of her friends and family. "I'd better get on board the plane now!" A chorus of "Farewell" followed her down the gate. "Good luck!," Usagi added. Not noticed by anyone, Akbar el-Salaam had boarded the plane right behind Ami. Since most of the nuclear device was plastic in composition (it even had a plastique primer), he managed to scoot by security with that and some machine guns--also made mostly of plastic--with no problems. Half an hour had passed on the flight. A flight attendant in one of the most revealing uniforms ever worn by such a person--it had a microminiskirt and the blazer, vest and shirt revealed a lot of cleavage--went up to Ami and asked her what she wanted for lunch. "What do you have?," replied Ami. The flight attendant answered, "We have yellow fin tuna or beef teriyaki." "UGH!," said Ami in disgust, "I can't stand yellow fin tuna! I'll have the beef teriyaki." The flight attendant went to the next seat and asked him what he wanted. Suddenly, Akbar leapt up, grabbed one of his machine guns and roared "ALLAH AKBAR! ALLAH AKBAR! This is Islamic Jihad! We are seizing this plane in the name of Allah! You are to fly this plane to Lawndale, USA, or I will kill everyone aboard!" Screams of panic filled the plane. Ami now realized that she wasn't going to Germany today. And she had to be there to register for classes, or forfeit her tuition deposit. But that was no longer a grave concern, not when death stared you in the face. For Mizuno Ami, she had to take action and save the plane from this madman. Data 4: Jihad at 25,000 Feet Akbar was in a rage now. He started to fire indiscriminately at anyone he could vent his anger at. Ami ducked down just as a stray bullet buried itself into the left temple of the passenger in front of her. Akbar grabbed the flight attendant, and ripped her blazer, vest and shirt off, leaving her bra barely hanging by the tattered straps. She began to cry as Akbar stormed forward into the cockpit. "GO TO HELL, INFIDEL!", he roared as his gun spat bullets everywhere. The pilot, co-pilot and navigator fell dead. Akbar then went to the control and programmed the auto pilot on a course for Lawndale. He then stormed back into the first class compartment. "There is no God but Allah, and Mohammed is His prophet!," roared Akbar. "The Great Satan will burn in Hell for all eternity! Death to the American Satan! The infidel must die! ALLAH AKBAR! ALLAH AKBAR!" Akbar then undid the buttons of his shirt and revealed the nuclear device strapped to his abdomen. With a calm dexterity he armed the device for the precise moment the plane would be flying over Lawndale High School's football field. Ami was still in a ducked position. She was trying to get her mini-computer/communicator that she always carried with her and try to send a message back to Tokyo; she finally found it and activated it. "This is Ami!," she began; "Usagi, Rei, Mako, Minako, Mamoru, anyone, can you hear me! We're being held hostage!" Akbar heard what was going on, and stormed right to Ami's seat. He grabbed Ami by the hair and roared a savage yell. "You will pay for that, you American pig!," he screamed. "My name is Mizuno Ami," she began to reply. "I am a citizen of Japan. That is all I will tell you!" "American, Japanese, it doesn't matter to me!," Akbar yelled back; "You will pay for what you did, infidel!" Then Akbar savagely threw a left hook right into Ami's right eye, causing her to yelp in excruciating pain as she collapsed on the floor. He then began to kick her on the floor, kicking her in every conceivable area: her head, her pelvis, her legs, her shins, the base of her spine, the solar plexus. He then took the butt of one of his guns and began to hit her with that as well. Fifteen horrifying minutes later, Ami was horribly black and blue. Ami began to cry. "DON'T CRY, YOU BITCH!", Akbar roared as he slapped her across the face. He then seized her by the collar of her seifuku and ripped it in half. "Take the rest of your clothes off now!" Ami was too afraid at this point to refuse. She took what was left of her tattered clothes off and submitted to a humiliating search. There was nowhere Akbar left unexamined. "At least you don't have any more devices on you!;" shouted Akbar; "As far as I know, you might be an agent for the CIA or the FBI or even working for the Russians! I don't trust you, you swine! I'm locking you in the lavatory until we reach our destination!" "But what if we have to go to there?," said one passenger. Akbar fired his machine gun and killed him. "SILENCE!," he roared. He then took the nude Ami and threw her into the lavatory, putting a food cart next to it so Ami couldn't open the door. Ami was all alone now. She could see bruises all over her body. She hadn't felt so alone or so helpless since her mother told her that she was getting a divorce from her father. Ami began to cry. "Queen Serenity, help me in my time of need!", she sobbed silently. Akbar had returned to the first class cabin. He was extremely enraged now. He began to scream out a diatribe against the United States: "The Great Satan must pay for his atrocities against Islam! The Great Satan must be destroyed for his supporting the Jewish interlopers in Palestine! The Great Satan must suffer for his sins of arrogance! Death to the American Satan! The infidel must die!" Everyone on the plane was cowed into silence with his ranting. Suddenly, he said, "I now hereby order all of you to sing!" "What do you want us to sing?," asked another passenger. Akbar commanded, "You are to sing 'Morning Has Broken' from that great singer Yosof Islam, or as you infidels know him, Cat Stevens. He supports the Ayatollah Khomeini's death sentence against that pig, Salman Rushdie. Anyone who refuses to sing will be shot! ALLAH AKBAR! ALLAH AKBAR!" Slowly, at first, the crowd began to sing: "Morning has broken/Like the first dawn..." "LOUDER!," Akbar screamed. The crowd began to sing louder. Akbar then headed to the cockpit, shoved the corpse of the pilot aside and got on the radio to announce what he had just done. After that, he sent a machine gun burst into the radio, disabling it. He then returned to the first class cabin. Back at Japan, the news spread like wildfire as soon as it got off the wires: "We interrupt our regularly scheduled programming here at NHK to bring you this special bulletin. A Japan Air Lines jet from Narita Airport to Berlin, Germany, has just been hijacked by a terrorist who says he's with Islamic Jihad. He has set a course for the United States, destination unknown at this time. He claims to have already killed several passengers and will kill more unless he is given free passage to the United States. His ultimate intentions are unknown at this time. NHK will keep you posted on further developments as this alarming situation develops." Gov. Nagai, having heard the news, made hasty arrangements to address the issue at a press conference: "My friends, I have received this distressing news myself only moments ago. My heart goes out to those aboard, especially our own fellow countrymen, who are now facing indescribable terror. To the hijacker, I must warn him that any further deaths on his part will result in the condemnation of the world." "I assure everyone here, that if I am elected, I will introduce legislation that will address the threat of terrorism here in Japan. We only know too well that not even our nation is immune; witness the serin attack on the Tokyo subway system just three years ago. I propose that a joint special unit consisting of SDF and National Police personnel be formed to help combat the scourge of terrorism while at the same time adhere to the prohibitions of Article 9. I propose that better security measures be put in place at our airports, railway stations and maritime facilities. It is time to send a message to terrorists of all stripes that Japan will no longer be an easy target for them." Gov. Nagai left without taking any questions from the press. The Sailor Senshi were gathered at Sendai Hill Temple when the news broke. Rei and her grandfather didn't own a television themselves, but Kumada Yuuichirou, a retired rock singer who had been living in the shrine for several years now, had one in his room. When he saw the bulletin, he raced out of his room and into the courtyard. "Guys! Guys! You've got to see this!," Yuuichirou said; "It was just on NHK, but I can get it on CNN as well!" Since Yuuichirou had a satellite dish installed, he could pull in the American cable channels like CNN. "What's going on, Yuuichirou?," Rei asked. "Something about a hijacking or something like that, Rei," Yuuichirou replied. Everyone scrambled to Yuuichirou's room. He had tuned in to CNN. Wolf Blitzer was at the State Department covering the event. "We can now confirm that Islamic Jihad is behind this," Blitzer said. "The Imam Al-Kabaz, who heads the Beirut branch of the organization, announced that it was Akbar el-Salaam who took control of the JAL flight from Tokyo to Berlin and has now set a course for the United States. Islamic Jihad still refuses to reveal where in the United States the plane will land, if it does at all." "Oh, my god! Ami's on that flight!," Usagi said. "What can we do?", Haruka added "Right now, they're right in the middle of the ocean." Suddenly, Rei's grandfather raced in. "Rei! Rei! Come quickly!," he said. "The Great Fire is raging out of control!" Everyone ran to where the Great Fire was burning. Sure enough, it was indeed burning furiously as it had never burned before. "This is not a good sign," Rei said. "There are demonic forces at play here." Phobos and Deimos, Rei's pet crows, had flown in and witnessed the fire. They were beginning to act strangely, like Rei had never seen them act before. "In all my years I have been the priest of this shrine, I have never witnesses anything like this!," Rei's grandfather said. "In fact, nowhere in the shrine chronicles has anything this intense ever happened until now! May all the kami and megami of our faith protect us at this trying time!" Usagi turned to Daria and told her, "Now you understand the seriousness of what we do here. This is no kid's game we're engaged in. I used to be a big crybaby and whine a lot, but now I know what my destiny is. I'm supposed to lead humanity to a better future, and fight those who would destroy that vision. Daria, you have to tell me right now: Are you in for this--no matter how high the stakes get in this situation--or are you out?" Daria now knew the gravity of the situation. God only knows where the terrorist was taking the plane; even the people she cared for (in her own way) might be in danger. "I'm in," Daria replied in her calm, monotone voice. "I request that all of you leave me here while I meditate," Rei asked. "Now, when all Hell's breaking loose?," Mako said in shock. "I will pray for the deliverance of the hostages," Rei replied. Rei's grandfather and Yuuichirou ushered the others out of the room. Rei got on her knees, the sweat from the intense heat of the fire dropping from her forehead like mad. She raised her hands in supplication. "Mother," Rei began, "I know you can hear me. I have prayed to you since your death. You know that I miss you dearly, but you and Grandpa taught me the ways of the miko. I pray to you now to help my friend Ami. She too has suffered pain and suffering in her life, and now her own life is in jeopardy. If she is in mortal danger, help her. I cannot help her myself now, for she is far away. Listen to my entreaties, Mother. This I pray in the name of Amaterasu-Omikami, the Great Heaven Shining Deity who watches over our people." Suddenly, the fire died out. A woman in flowing red robes, robes that seem to be aflame with the very fire of the Sun itself, appeared; she had long, flowing black hair and her eyes seemed to be aflame with solar fire themselves. It was Amaterasu-Omikami herself. Rei did not want to admit it, but now she was trembling. "Do not be afraid of me, my child," Amaterasu-Omikami began to say; "I have heard your supplication and all shall be done as you have asked." She reached a hand out to her forehead, and it seemed energy flowed from her to Rei. "Receive this gift of mine; it is extra energy to help you in the ordeal ahead," Amaterasu-Omikami said. "Go in peace, my child." With that, she vanished, and Rei seemed to faint. She recovered a few minutes later and left the room. She did not dare reveal at the time what had happened. It was the morning of the big game at Lawndale, due to the time difference. The Lawndale Militia had gathered for a pre-attack meeting. Anthony Corlew stood up deliver a pre-attack speech: "My comrades in arms! This is the big day we have been planning for months now. If we need yet another reason why we need to take over Lawndale, then the nation, it is in the news we've all heard this morning. The hijacking of the JAL flight proves that we need to seize power. If we had a government that was not afraid to use its military might when needed, things like this wouldn't happen. Our present philandering, draft-dodging President does not have the balls to use his powers that are given to him. And if--God forbid--the hijacker explodes the plane over our airspace, it will not look good for us. Therefore, in the name of all that is right with the white middle class, let us mobilize and take our positions." The members of the militia got up and began to move out. Dr. Vander Helffen was watching the coverage of the hijacking situation on Asahi TV. He had summoned Yoriko, who was expected to arrive shortly. Yoriko entered. Dr. Vander Helffen motioned her to sit down. He said: "Yoriko, now is the time for us to launch 'Operation Iron Fist.' Now that the attention of the world is focused on this hijacking, now is the time to strike. Get our best ninja soldiers together and get some sarin bombs and proceed to the joint SDF/USAF base near Yokohama. Now is the time to strike while the iron is hot!" "Understood, Dr. Vander Helffen," responded Yoriko. Data 5: The NIRAA Strikes! At Lawndale High School, Mr. DeMartino was speaking to Angela Li, the principal. He was trying to persuade her to cancel the game due to some security concerns. "Ms. Li," Mr. DeMartino began, "given the fact that a terrorist has seized a plane and has it going to the United States has me gravely concerned that there might be a chance he might bring it over to our community. We should cancel the game." "Forget it, DeMartino," Ms. Li said, "there's too much money at stake here! We've got a sold out stadium, I promised Mystic Spiral I'd pay them $1000 for playing the national anthem, and the Fashion Club's poised to make a lot of sales with their homemade goodies." "Dammit, Ms. Li," Mr. DeMartino roared, "is money all you ever think about? What about people's lives?" "I could make things rather rough on you if I ask the Board of Education of start disciplinary hearings against you for insubordination!," warned Ms. Li. With that, Mr. DeMartino realized that Ms. Li had him. "All right," shouted Mr. DeMartino, "go ahead with your damn game, but it'll be on your conscience if anything happens to anyone out there!" With that, he left the office. "Paranoid bastard!," Ms. Li dismissed the entire affair with a huff. Downtown Lawndale was quiet, since almost everyone was heading for the game. Meanwhile, the Lawndale Militia had quietly assumed attack positions. Trucks were parked in strategic positions in town. Anthony was making a check of the situation. "Troop A ready at City Hall?," he said on a portable CB radio. "Check," said the first troop leader. "Troop B ready at Police Headquarters?," Anthony asked. "Check," replied the second troop leader. Finally, Anthony asked, "Troop C ready at the Courthouse?" "Check," stated the third troop leader. All was set. "OK, now we wait for the right moment to strike," said Anthony. Almost no one noticed when a bus stopped and left off Beavis and Butt-Head, who began their hideous laughter as they headed down the street toward the high school. "Wait a minute," Anthony said, "it's those two idiots who threw firecrackers at the scrimmage." "Should we kill them?," Poindexter asked. "No," Anthony replied. "We'll deal with those two soon enough. Hold your positions. It'll only make the taste of victory that much sweeter." The joint SDF/USAF base near Yokohama was one of the biggest on Honshu, the main island of Japan. Airman First Class Brian Mackenzie, Mack's cousin, was doing some routine maintenance on his F-15C Eagle when he got the orders. "Mackenzie," Sgt. Frank Stone said, "we've just got our orders in from the Pentagon. We are to intercept the JAL plane and force the terrorist to land the plane outside the mainland. Your unit is to scramble immediately." Brian didn't waste time. He finished up his maintenance and got ready to go. He didn't even notice the white, unmarked truck that was approaching the gate. The two guards on sentry duty did, but they were ran over as the truck crashed through the gate and pulled to a stop. It was what he saw next that was shocking. The NIRAA ninja soldiers pulled out small black boxes, pushed the buttons on them, and then donned gas masks. Brian, not a fool, got into the cockpit of his fighter and activated the oxygen. The devices went off, sending deadly clouds of sarin gas in the air. There was enough to kill everyone outside. Brian activated his radio and alerted the tower: "This is Airman Mackenzie to tower! Some terrorists have just entered the base and activated sarin bombs! Seal all vents in all buildings at once! I'll try to stop the terrorists until help comes. Out!" The cloud began to subside, and the ninja terrorists moved toward the hangar where the Neo-Zero prototype was being stored. They now had their masks off. It turned out that one of the ninja soldiers was none other than Yoriko herself. "Open the doors to that hanger!," she ordered. Two of the ninja soldiers opened the doors, and the Neo-Zero prototype was now revealed. It was unlike any jet fighter the SDF currently had. Based on the rejected YF-23 design from Northrop/McDonnell Douglas, the Neo-Zero was vastly improved by Mitsubishi over the original design specifications. The capacity for AAM's had been doubled thanks to the design of new, smaller and more effective "Neo-Sidewinder" missiles; one of those had the explosive power of two regular Sidewinders. The machine guns were also new: it was the experimental 35-mm "Deathgrip" cannon. Further, radar jamming devices on the fighter made it even more stealthy than it already was. All in all, the Neo-Zero was a worthy successor to the legendary fighter plane that was its namesake; although paying homage to the past, it was symbolizing Japan's ascendancy as the second most powerful nation in the world, a nation that was committed to peace, albeit it was ready to defend that peace if need be. Yoriko stepped up to the cockpit and opened the canopy. She stepped in and began the pre-flight check. Brian had seen what was going on. Until help arrived, it was up to him to stop the hijacking. "Hold it right there!," he yelled. Yoriko had started the Neo-Zero up, and it was slowly taxiing out of the hangar toward Brian. "I said to hold it right there!," he repeated. Yoriko fired the Deathgrip cannon. Brian got out of the way, only to be in the way of several ninja soldiers who proceeded to use their nunchuckas on him. Yoriko now got on the runway and put the plane on full throttle; it was roaring down the runway and soon took off. Yoriko activated the afterburners and soon the craft reached its maximum speed of Mach 2.5, once again an improvement over the YF-23's original performance specs. Yoriko armed all systems, and set a course for Tokyo. Luckily for Brian, several MP's arrived on the scene. After a brief scuffle, the ninja soldiers had been captured, but already the damage had been done. One of the MP's asked Brian, "Did you see what happened?" "Every last thing, Sir," Brian said. "I tried to stop them, but they had detonated serin bombs. I was lucky to escape that, they tried again to stop them. They overwhelmed me." "Airman," replied the MP, "this is a very serious matter that's just happened here. Whoever has that fighter can cause havoc anywhere in Japan right now. But at least your quick thinking might have spared quite a few lives inside. We're going to send you to Gen. Torymura for a debriefing." Brian followed the MP's as they put the captured ninja soldiers in a truck. They were soon heading for the base stockade and the main administration building. Sendai Hill Shrine was abuzz with activity. Reports were coming in about the JAL situation, and now the report of the theft of the Neo-Zero was coming in. "We've just got this report in from Yokohama," an NHK anchorperson began to say. "An experimental jet fighter has just been stolen from the joint SDF/USAF base located at the port city. It seems to be on a direct course for Tokyo. SDF and American military personnel are asking all civilians to take necessary precautions in case of an air attack. We will have further warnings and bulletins here on NHK as we receive them." "I guess now I should tell you about my meeting with Ryu," Mamoru said. "What do you mean, Mamo-chan?," Usagi asked. Mamoru began, "Ryu asked--I digress, demanded--the Sailor Senshi's assistance in case the Neo-Zero fighter was hijacked. We have no choice. Special Intelligence has extensive files on each of us." "But they don't have one on me," Daria was quick to point out. "Not yet," Mamoru replied. Mamoru's cellular phone began to ring. "Hello, Chiba Mamoru speaking," was his answer. "Mamoru," said the voice on the phone, "this is Ryu. The time has come. You and the others are to go to the joint SDF/USAF base in Yokohama for you assignment briefing immediately." Ryu stopped there and hung up. "We've just got our orders," said Mamoru. "We've got to move it to the SDF/USAF base at once." Usagi never thought that the Sailor Senshi would ever be called to stop an internal threat to Japan; always the threat was from outer space, from another dimension, from another time. Now Usagi and the others had grown up too fast. "All right, everyone!," said Usagi, "It looks like we have no choice in this matter! Prepare to transform!" The Sailor Senshi began their transformations again: "ETERNAL MOON STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER CHIBI-MOON STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER MARS STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER JUPITER STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER VENUS STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER SATURN STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER URANUS STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER NEPTUNE STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER PLUTO STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" "SUPER MERCURY STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" As soon as each of the Sailor Senshi and Mamoru had completed their transformation, they headed for the base. "I never thought my trip was going to take this turn!," Daria said to herself, still fussing over her seirafuku. "Ladies and gentlemen," Gen. Torymura began to speak, "I guess you know why you're here right now. The Neo-Zero prototype has been stolen by the New Imperial Rule Assistance Association, an extreme right-wing organization that wants to restore the wartime military government that had ruled Japan. This aircraft is so advanced, it makes every jet fighter now with the SDF obsolete. The NIRAA's objective is to use the Neo-Zero in a terrorist campaign to bomb Tokyo until the civilian government surrenders to them. Your mission is to stop the Neo-Zero and the NIRAA at all costs. You have complete authority to use whatever means necessary to stop them. Do I make myself clear?" "General," Sailor Moon began, "with all due respect, the Sailor Senshi are not some mercenary force; we don't go out on commando missions for anyone." "Listen, sister," Gen. Torymura replied, "this isn't any fun and games here! You're not dealing with some powerful alien beings trying to take over the world! We're dealing with a ruthless terrorist organization that wants to re-annex both Koreas, all of Sakhalin Island, the Kuriles and Taiwan as well as retake the Philippines, Papua New Guinea, Singapore, Malaysia, India, Pakistan, The People's Republic of China, Bangladesh, Bhutan, Vietnam, Mynamar, Cambodia, Laos, Thailand, the Pescadores, Indonesia and the various Oceanic nations. They've even issued grandiose statements about waging nuclear war against the United States, Russia, Great Britain and France. Sailor Moon, or shall I call you Ms. Tsukino, this is a very grave matter. This isn't something you can just say some magic words and hope your enemies turn to dust. We must use force against the NIRAA and stop them from destroying half a century of progress!" "But by using some of the methods your government denounces the NIRAA in using, isn't your government being hypocritical?," Daria retorted. "No one asked you, sister!," Gen. Torymura replied. "And who the Hell are you anyway? You're not Mizuno Ami, alias Sailor Mercury!" "No, I'm not," she replied. "I'm Daria Morgendorffer from the United States. I'm filling in for Ms. Mizuno. She's now on board the JAL plane that's been taken hostage by Islamic Jihad." "Don't get wise with me, Ms. Morgendorffer!," replied Gen. Torymura. "You may sass around like you do back in the United States, but remember, we have a saying here in Japan: 'The nail that sticks up gets hammered down!'" "And we have a saying back at the United States you should know about," snapped back Daria. "And what's that?," demanded Gen. Torymura. "'Up yours!,'" shouted Daria. Gen. Torymura seemed to blow a fuse. "Daria, that was uncalled for!", Luna said, dropping her reservations about speaking when strangers were about. "You listen and you listen good, all of you!," said Gen. Torymura. "You will co-operate with us, or you will never get out of all the possible legal trouble you could face!" Daria seized Gen. Torymura by his lapels and threw him against the wall. "Now you listen to me, Sir!," growled Daria. "I've got a friend on board that JAL flight and I'm scared for her! For the first time in my life, I'm worried for my family back home! The last thing I need is your military crap! We'll stop the NIRAA from blowing up Tokyo and maybe get your precious Neo-Zero back, but we want to play by our rules! Adults screw up things a lot as it is! And the last thing I need is some holier-than-thou flag officer in my face!" Daria let go of him and he seemed to slink to the floor. He got us slowly. "Fine, do it your way," he finally conceded; "see if I care. I'm not going to argue with a bullheaded, hotheaded American gaijin-shojo with an attitude problem. I just hope to God you save our nation, that's all." Somehow, Daria had a humbling effect on Gen. Torymura. "We'd better check the radar readings," he finally said. They left to go to the radar room. Yoriko was now over Tokyo. She was trying to pick her first target. She saw the famed Sendai Hill Shrine ahead of her. "That will be my first target!," she said. She locked on the target on the fighter's HUD, then pressed the fire button. One of the Neo-Sidewinders ejected from the fighter and flew straight for the shrine. Yuuichirou saw the missile firing and ran to get Rei's grandfather. However, the missile was faster than him, and it blew the shrine to matchwood. "DIRECT HIT!," Yoriko roared. Yoriko then flew toward the Kuriles. The NIRAA had a secret base there, since it was in Russian jurisdiction, and Japan dared not try to follow here there. Dr. Vander Helffen was supposed to meet her there. The radar at the SDF/USAF base was tracking the movements of the Neo-Zero. It has just seen the attack. "Sir," said the SDF private who was checking the radar for Gen. Torymura, "I believe that the fighter just attacked in the area of Sendai Hill." A sickening thought raced through Rei's mind when she heard that. "Oh, no! Not Grandpa!," she screamed. There was only one thing to do: head back to the shrine. When they got to the shrine, the TMPD as well as the Tokyo Fire Department were already on the scene. Several TMPD officers were digging through the rubble when they pulled out Yuuichirou. Rei ran up to him; he was barely alive. "Yuuichirou," Rei said, "where's Grandpa? Is he alive?" "I don't know," was all he said. He blacked out. "Get him to the hospital!," one of the TMPD officers sharply ordered a paramedic. Yuuichirou was taken away. "We've found something!," said a firefighter. Rei raced up to where the fireman was. They had unearthed something, all right. Rei stopped in her tracks when she saw what it was. It was the short, bald corpse of her grandfather, still clad in his priestly clothes. She yelled, "Grandpa, it's me, Rei. Please tell me you're all right!" She began to shake the corpse. The firefighter looked for vital signs. "No pulse, no respiration," he said. " I'm sorry, Miss, but he's dead." Rei shrieked with a loud "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!," and began to cry uncontrollably. Daria went up to her and let her rest her head on her shoulder. "I'm very sorry, Rei," Daria said, and for the first time in her teenage life, she was beginning to cry herself. She never felt anything like this before. "Grandpa," Rei began to say, "I will avenge your death! I will not rest until I've destroyed whoever did this to you!" Usagi and the other Sailor Senshi began to cry as well. Mamoru gripped his gloved hands in fists of rage. "Do not worry, Rei," he said to himself, "the Sailor Senshi and I will help you in this! This I swear!" A couple of hours had passed in the lavatory where Ami was being held prisoner. Ami had apparently fallen asleep, for then she saw a strange light, and someone standing next to her. "Who are you?," she asked. "I am the spirit of Hino Rei's mother," the apparition said. "My beloved daughter prayed to me and asked me to help you. I will grant you your deepest, fondest wish in your heart." "I wish I had my Sailor Mercury powers back so I can save the passengers." "So it shall be done." With a wave of her hand, the ghost imparted energy into Ami, and automatically she began the transformation to Sailor Mercury. Now with new-found strength, Ami kicked down the door. Akbar heard it, and roared, "What's going on?" "You evil man!," shouted Ami. "I will not allow you to carry out your plan! I am Super Sailor Mercury, Champion of Love and Justice! In the name of Mercury, I will punish you!" "The only one who will be punished here will be you, infidel!," roared back Akbar. "And Allah's punishment is the worst of all! He will condemn you to Hell, you Satan!" With that, he lunged for Sailor Mercury and applied a chokehold on her. Data 6: Enter the Solar Warrior Ieyasu was watching the latest reports on both the JAL hijacking and the Neo-Zero attack. He looked outside toward the Nick that was in the backyard. "Somehow, my old friend," he began to say to himself, "we might have to fly one more mission together." The NHK anchorperson was continuing his report: "In reaction to these latest developments, Tokyo-to Governor Nagai Kenji had this to say:" "This unprovoked attack on our own citizens by this terrorist organization is highly outrageous and receives my strongest condemnation," Gov. Nagai began to say; "I an calling on the government to investigate this matter and to check into SDF security procedures as soon as this crisis is over." The anchorperson added after that: "The latest NHK/Yorimuri Shimbun poll now indicates that Gov. Nagai now enjoys a comfortable 32 percent margin over his nearest Liberal Democratic and Socialist opponents." He then paused as he received some word over his earphone. "We had just received a message from the person claiming to be responsible for this attack. We are now playing this audiotape as per the person's request." The tape began playing: "This is Amazana Yoriko of the New Imperial Rule Assistance Association. We have the Neo-Zero prototype and we are not afraid to use it. We demand that the civilian government immediately surrender to us, or else another ward of Tokyo will be bombed by the Neo-Zero prototype every three hours. Furthermore, all SDF and American military bases will also be attacked. I urge the civilian government to do the right thing and surrender. That is all." "NHK will continue to update you on this situation," added the anchorperson. Ieyasu turned off his TV. Now it was only a matter of time. He went to the family shrine and knelt before it. He grabbed a samurai sword that had been in his family for over ten generations and offered it up to the shrine. "Spirits of my ancestors, hear me! I will not return this sword to its place until I either have vanquished those who threaten our nation or until it is presented as an offering to my departed soul. I nay not survive this attack, but I know that I will go to a far better place than this." With that, he also grabbed the ceremonial Kamikaze headband which he wore during his service in World War II and wrapped it around his forehead. His wife, Natsume, saw what was going on, and approached him. "What is the meaning of this?," she asked. "Our nation is in peril once again, and I must answer the call to duty," was all he said as he went to the backyard. Natsume stood there in shock. "The gods protect him!," was all she said. It was not long before the next attack did occur--on Shinjuku. The Sailor Senshi were on patrol in the area. Sailor Moon, Luna, Artemis and Tuxedo Mask were in front, the rest behind. "Keep an eye out for the jet," Tuxedo Mask said. "We don't know when another attack could occur." Daria was right behind Sailor Moon. All she could think of right now was that Ami was in danger on board the JAL plane; Rei had suffered the loss of her grandfather; and her own family was probably at risk at home. This wasn't what she had in mind when she decided to go to Tokyo. "Pay attention, Daria!," Sailor Jupiter said as she elbowed Daria in the back. "I'm sorry, Mako, but I was distracted," replied Daria. Towering above Daria were the skyscrapers of Shinjuku, the Japanese equivalent of Wall Street. Daria could see such buildings as the Mitsubishi Building, the Tokyo Stock Exchange, the Mitsui Building and the Matsushita Building. Somehow the image lent itself of a forest of concrete and steel trees; as in any forest, there were unseen dangers lurking. Suddenly, it streaked out of nowhere. It was the Neo-Zero prototype! It was at its top speed of Mach 2.5. "Heads up!," Sailor Moon yelled. With that, she grabbed her old Moon Scepter with the Silver Imperium Crystal in it and pointed it at the prototype. "On my mark, attack!," she yelled. Yoriko, in the cockpit, just snickered to herself. She had taken a portable CD player with her, and curiously enough, she had Soundgarden's "Down on the Upside" album in it. She turned it on and began playing "Ty Cobb". "Let's rock!," she growled. The growly voice of Chris Cornell slammed into Yoriko like a ton of bricks: "I am sittin' in a magic hat/With smoke and mirrors/And tire rubber fires/Watch me disappear!/Yeah, yeah, yeah!/What made it slow you down/Sucking on a ball and chain/Another motherfucker goes down the drain!/Yeah, yeah, yeah!/Hardheaded, fuck you all!/Hardheaded, fuck you all!/Hardheaded, fuck you all!/Just add it on to the hot rod death toll!/Hardheaded, fuck you all!/Hardheaded, fuck you all!/Hardheaded, fuck you all!/Just add it on to the hot rod death toll!" Somehow every time she heard this song, Yoriko had this mental image of Ty Cobb chasing people with a big baseball bat and beating their brains out with it. She squeezed her fingers over the trigger for the Deathgrip cannon and began to fire. "GO TO HELL, BASTARDS!", she roared. The bullets tore through the air like hot needles through butter. Panic had seized the people inside the office buildings, for now they were emptying and people were running in terror, straight for the Sailor Senshi. "Citizens, please calm down!," Sailor Moon implored, but to no avail. The Sailor Senshi saw themselves jostled by the fleeing populace. It was all in vain. Yoriko used the HUD to aim one of the Neo-Sidewinders at the Matsushita Building. She fired one of them, and the building was blown to pieces! The force of the explosion knocked Sailor Moon to the ground. Daria helped her up. "This is sheer madness!," Sailor Moon yelled. "Right now, we've got to try and stop the attack," Daria yelled back. Yoriko was flying for another pass, with the Deathgrip cannon roaring again. Several people were cut down like grass from the deadly fusillade of bullets. Sailor Moon now knew it was now or never. She pointed her scepter at the jet fighter. "MOON PRINCESS HALATION!," she yelled. The powerful beam issued from her scepter, but was easily deflected by the Neo-Zero's radar-absorbing skin. It was now Sailor Mars' turn. She was going to use her new "Mars Fireball Attack" to bring down the plane. "This is for you, Grandpa!," she screamed, then said "SUPER MARS FIREBALL, FLAME UP!" Two fireballs issued from her hands, and struck squarely on the cockpit. But the plane didn't even suffer a scratch. What no one noticed in all the confusion was that Tetsuo was in the area, and had seen all that had happened. Now he was in a side street, raising his hands in supplication to the Sun. "Amaterasu-Omikami, give thee they mortal servant the power of the Solar Warrior!," he yelled. The flames of power engulfed him again, and the Solar Warrior emerged. Daria thought she could stop the plane with her own powers, or at least give it a try. "SHABON SPRAY, FREEZING!," she yelled. A stream of ice gushed forth, and even managed to coat the plane, but the engines were just too warm for it to last. The ice rapidly melted. "Dammit!," Daria snarled. Yoriko fired another Neo-Sidewinder, this time taking out the Tokyo Stock Exchange. "God, how I love the smell of burning concrete and steel in the morning!," she roared in pride. Somehow, to Daria, this whole scene was beginning to look like something out of "Apocalypse Now." If only either The Doors' "The End" or Richard Wagner's "Ride of the Valkyries" was playing in the background, it would be eerily complete. But now the Solar Warrior appeared out of nowhere, and stood up on some debris. "Miscreant!," he yelled; "Cease this useless attack! I am the Solar Warrior, servant to Amaterasu-Omakami, Goddess of the Sun and Protector of the Japanese! In the name of the Sun, you will be judged!" Sailor Moon couldn't realize what was happening first. To be fair, no one did. Yoriko saw the Solar Warrior and sneered. "SEE YOU IN HELL, BASTARD!", she roared as she fired the Deathgrip cannon again. The bullets, however, bounced off the Solar Warrior's armor. The Solar Warrior then pointed his gauntlets at the craft. "SOLAR FLARE DISCHARGE ATTACK!," he screamed. The fiery energy discharged and hit the jet fighter squarely in the port engine. Yoriko was seen reeling. "Dammit, dammit, dammit!," she screamed. She had difficulty stabilizing her flight, but managed to succeed. She began to limp back to the secret base in the Kuriles. Sailor Moon and the others stood there in shock for a few minutes. They couldn't believe what they just seen. The Solar Warrior turned to them and said, "She won't be bothering anyone for a while." "Who are you?," Sailor Moon recovered enough to ask. "I am the Solar Warrior," he began to reply, "servant to Amaterasu-Omakami, Goddess of the Sun and Protector of Japan. I do know about you, Sailor Moon, or shall I call you Tsukino Usagi, or even yet Princess Serenity?" "How--how do you know?," Sailor Moon wanted to know. The Solar Warrior continued, "I am the last surviving member of the old Solar Realm that existed tens of thousands of years ago in what was known as the Golden Epoch. My race was old when yours was not even established yet. I assure you that I am on your side in this battle." Luna, ever the doubting Thomas, said, "Prove it." The Solar Warrior produced an old relic: a Moon Kingdom Medallion of Valor, the highest award that was ever given by that old dominion. "This was once given to my by Queen Serenity for services rendered in stopping a Mecha-Dominion attack against her realm. This was long before you were born, Sailor Moon." Sailor Moon and Luna both saw it. "No doubt it is the real thing," Luna finally said. "Very well, we will accept you as an ally for now." "I'd better be going," the Solar Warrior said, then departed. Daria seemed to be strongly drawn to the Solar Warrior, but didn't know why. Was it that he alone was fighting for his nation where everyone else was running, or that he seemed to be such a caring person as to risk all in saving complete strangers? This person wasn't like the students back home in Lawndale, the typical dumb jocks and airheads who put down brainy people like her. "Daria, snap out of it!," Sailor Pluto said. "You're drifting again." "Sorry," replied Daria. Yoriko barely made it back to the secret base in the Kuriles. she jumped out of the cockpit and cursed her luck. "Get this prototype fixed up immediately!," she shrieked. Dr. Vander Helffen had just arrived, and he was not happy. "What is the matter, Dr. Vander Helffen?," she asked. "It's the 'Hi no Tori' immortality pills," he started. "I'm almost out of them." "WHAT!," Yoriko yelled. "I've been having difficulties getting the ingredients to make more," he said, "and I don't know when they'll be available. I have to make more, because if we miss even one dose, serious side effects from withdrawal will occur. Please be patient with me, and I will make more." Dr. Vander Helffen was buying some time, but even he knew that he had to make more soon, for the pills had an addicting effect on whoever took them. Dr. Vander Helffen himself took another pill of his creation to counteract the addictive cravings, but he didn't give it to Yoriko; as long as she was addicted, she would remain loyal to him. Yoriko, mad as ever, shrieked and stormed out of the landing area, punching out two ninja soldiers standing guard duty. She didn't know how long it was that Akbar had her in a chokehold, but Ami somehow knew that she was on the verge of blacking out. Akbar was yelling some nonsense or something, but she was in such a oxygen-deprived stupor that it didn't make any sense. Suddenly, someone got out of his seat and took a tray, banging it against Akbar's head. Akbar let go of Ami, took a knife from his belt, and threw it squarely into the heart of his attacker. He fell dead, but it bought Ami some time. She got up and charged right at Akbar. They fell to the floor and rolled around, exchanging punches. Akbar then got the upper hand, held Ami down and began to sucker punch her. "YOU WILL DIE, YOU INFIDEL BITCH!," he yelled. Ami summoned up enough courage and kneed Akbar in the crotch. Akbar was sent howling. Now they stood glaring at each other. On one side was Mizuno Ami, the second of the Sailor Senshi to be discovered and veteran of numerous battles against evil; at the opposite end was Akbar el-Salaam, the terrorist who had murdered countless Israelis and swore to destroying the modern Jewish state. Ami tried to think back to whether she was in so much danger. Never, she realized. Even the first battle against the Dark Kingdom was easy. But this was different: This was a mere mortal human, with only the hatred in his heart fueling his rage. "Give it up, Akbar! You can't win, and you know it!" "NEVER!," yelled Akbar; "I WILL SACRIFICE THIS WHOLE SHIP IN THE NAME OF ALLAH!" Ami took a look out a window. The West Coast of the United States was now visible, and in due time they'd be over it. What was not known, however, was that in a couple of hours time they'd be over Lawndale. "God, please don't let me die!," screamed the flight attendant. "SILENCE!," roared Akbar. Ami knew that if she was going to stop Akbar, now was the time. Ami threw herself right against Akbar, and the both fell against the emergency hatch. It was about an hour before kickoff, and already a huge crowd had filled the stands at the football field. Jake, Helen and Quinn had grabbed good seats. "If only Daria was here right now," Jake said. "This is always her favorite time of the year." Quinn was wearing a jacket so she wouldn't be too cold. But now the temperature was a bit warm, so she took it off. "Quinn, I hope the Fashion Club does well selling its goodies!," Helen said. "We will, Mom," Quinn replied. Jane then showed up. "Jane," Quinn said, "You never show up for the big game! Why now?" "Because," Jane replied, "someone's got to watch over you in case Beavis and Butt-Head try anything funny on you!" Just as she said that, the familiar hideous laughter of Beavis and Butt-Head could be heard. "Uh, where's Diarrhea?," Butt-Head asked. "I told you, you two dolts, she's in Japan!," Quinn replied. Beavis, who had eaten seven candy bard on the way over. went spastic and began to do his Cornhulio schtick; he pulled his shirt over his head, raised his arms, shook his fists and then screamed: "AAAAAAAAAA! I AM THE GREAT CORNHULIO! YOU WILL GIVE ME TEE PEE FOR MY BUNG HOLE!" Jane seized the both of them and gave them a quick kick to their testicles. "Do that again, and I'll kick both your asses!," Jane roared. "Leave Quinn alone!" "This sucks! She got us in the nads," Beavis said as they both slunk away. "What assholes they are!," Jane said. "Jane," Quinn said in relief, "I didn't think I was ever going to say this, but thanks for saving my bacon there." "No problem," Jane replied. "I'll bill you later." "You wouldn't!," Quinn said. "Then again," added Jane rather quickly, "I'll let this be a freebie this time." The Lawndale Militia was poised to strike at any time. Poindexter, however, was getting antsy. "When are we going to strike?," he asked. "Soon," was all that Anthony Corlew said. "Patience is a virtue that a good soldier must have. We will strike when it is to our advantage." Anthony knew that soon the hammer would fall. But what he didn't know was that his plans would soon be turned on its head. Data 7: Black Saturday at Lawndale Back at the JAL plane, the fight between Ami and Akbar was now at a fever pitch. Akbar gave a kidney punch to Ami, sending her reeling. Ami staggered a bit from the blow, but wasn't down for the count yet. "I WILL KILL YOU IN THE NAME OF ALLAH!," Akbar screamed. With that, he opened the emergency hatch, and air gushed into the cabin. Everything that wasn't nailed down was blowing around the cabin. Akbar seized Ami and tried to toss her out of the open door. Ami, however, hung on with all the strength she could muster within herself. Ami took a good look at the device on Akbar: the clock said it would go off in ten minutes. Ami realized that she didn't have too much time left. "I WILL SEE YOU BURN IN HELL!," Akbar roared. He banged on Ami's left hand, causing her to momentarily lose her grip. She regained it as the wind was howling in her face. Suddenly, Ami kneed Akbar in the testicles, sending him howling. Ami clambered back on board; what she had to do had to be done quickly. "SHABON SPRAY, FREEZING!," she yelled. With that, Akbar was frozen solid. Ami pushed him from behind and sent him then and there through the open emergency exit and into the air! Somehow, Ami thought she heard a muffled "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" as he fell, down, down, down, tens of thousands of feet. The frozen body then landed in the ocean, and plunged, deep, deep, deep into the water. A shark saw Akbar and ate him whole. The shark then swam away. By then, the nuclear device went off, with the shark at ground zero and only killing whatever lives deep down in the furthest reaches of the ocean. Lawndale had been spared of one horror, but another was to come soon. The game was about to get underway at Lawndale. The PA system crackled to life: "Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to Lawndale High School! This afternoon your Lawndale Lions will take on the Highland Fighting Trojans!" With that, the announcer went into the usual descriptions of the starting lineups. After announcing that for Highland, Brittany and the other cheerleaders took to the field as the opening lineup for Lawndale was announced. As soon as it was time to announce the starting quarterback, the announcer took on the usual tone of fake enthusiasm appropriate for such occasions: "And, last but not least, here is your starting quarterback, the one, the only, KEVIN THOMPSON!" Kevin got onto the field, and Brittany gave him a big hug and a kiss. The crowd was going crazy. "GO GET 'EM, KEVIN!," Brittany said. "I will, Cupcake!," Kevin replied. The announcer continued: "And now, ladies and gentlemen, would you please rise and direct your attention to the fifty yard line as the band Mystik Spiral will play our National Anthem." Trent and Jesse--along with bassist Nicholas Campbell and drummer Max Tyler--were all set in mid-field. Jesse began to strum the guitar, and launched into a Jimi Hendrix-style solo. Trent got up to the microphone and began to sing: "Oh, yeah, oh, oh say, oh say, can you see, man/By the dawn's early light/What so proudly we hailed/At the twilight's last gleaming." Trent then gave a jagged guitar lick, with Jesse and Nicholas keeping in tempo; Trent continued: "Yeah, whose broad stripes and bright stars/Through the perilous fight (another screeching guitar lick from Jesse)/O'er the ramparts we watched/Were so gallantly streaming." The guitars went into overdrive, with Max pounding the drums furiously. "And the rocket's red glare," shrieked Trent Trent suddenly gave a note-for-note rendition of Hendrix's guitar burst at that point of the song, except this went on for five minutes. "The bombs bursting in air," continued Trent. Another five minute guitar attack. After that, Trent sang, "Gave proof through the night/That our flag was still there." Suddenly, Jesse began to strum the opening bars of "Chopin's Funeral March." Trent went into his big finish: "Oh, oh, oh say does that star spangled banner yet wave." Another long screeching note from Jesse. "O'er the land of the free. . .," Trent sand, and held the last note for a few seconds. Trent gave a long, screeching note on his guitar. Trent finished with, "And the home of the brave." All of a sudden, Trent and Jesse both crashed into a loud guitar crescendo: "DUH, DUH, DUH, DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH," while at the same time Trent sang, "America! America! America! Land of the free, baby!" After that, Max ended the song by banging twice a gong that had "A J. Arthur Rank Enterprise" written on it. After that, Trent flashed a peace sign, and said "Peace, dudes!" At first, everyone just stood there in stone cold silence. Jane then began to clap. Slowly, everyone else began to clap as well. Trent took a bow, as did the other members of Mystik Spiral. They left the field, with the applause still ringing through the stadium. Ms. Li smiled to herself and thought that this was $1000 well spent. There was a pause as the musical equipment was being cleared off the field. Soon, both teams took to the field. The captains for each team were huddled around the referee for the coin toss. "Mr. Mackenzie," the referee said, "As captain for the home team, you will call the toss. This coin I have is a real, honest-to-goodness replica of the infamous Batman villain Two-Face's lucky two-faced coin; a double-obverse 1922 Peace Dollar. You will either call 'Good side up!' or 'Scarred side up!' Do you understand?" "Why is that coin being used?," was all that Mack said. "Don't sweat it son," the referee said, "this coin was donated by one of the sponsors of the Lawndale football team, Lawndale Comics and Anime on Sugarbush Avenue in the middle of downtown Lawndale." Since he was wired to a mike, everyone could hear him. "Don't forget everyone, go there now for the big 'Sailor Moon' fan subbed video sale! All episodes ten percent off! And we'll give you an extra thirty percent off on the infamous episode where Sailor Jupiter brags about the size of her breasts if you can correctly guess her bra size!" "Ms. Li set you up to this as one of her money making schemes, didn't she?," Mack asked. "It only gets worse, son," the referee continued. "The stadium is now being called Surge Cola Stadium!" Mack groaned. "All right, already!," he said resignedly; "I'll call 'Good side up.'" The referee flipped the coin, and it landed good side up. "Good side up," the referee said; "Your team wins the toss. Do you wish to kick or receive? "We'll receive," replied Mack. "OK," said the referee; "good luck, gentlemen." Mack turned to Kevin and said, "Ms. Li has gone too far in selling out our school!" Highland kicked off the ball to open the game. Mack grabbed the ball, but only got as far as the twelve yard line before he was tackled. Kevin, Mack and the others now huddled around for the first play. "Mack," Kevin said, "you fake out toward the right and go for the long pass!" "That's probably where they would expect us to try!," responded Mack. "Hey, it'll work, trust me!," reassured Kevin. They broke huddle and then Kevin called the play. Mack faked right and then zoomed to the left. Kevin tried to make the pass, but then two hulking Highland tackles lunged right for him, forcing Kevin to retreat past his own goal line. In desperation he tired to make the pass, but then he was tackled for the safety. "And Highland grabs an early 2-0 lead by making a safety!," said the PA announcer. Brittany looked on and got disappointed. But then she got the cheerleaders going on one of their best cheers: "C'mon, Lawndale, roar, roar, roar! C'mon, Lawndale, roar, roar, roar!" Meanwhile, Quinn and the other members of the Fashion Club were selling their goodies. Unfortunately, when they passed by Beavis and Butt-Head, those two acted up again. "Uh, do you want to score with Beavis and me?," Butt-Head asked Sandi. "Like, get away from me!," shrieked Sandi. "Hey, here comes Diarrhea's sister! Let's hit up on her again!," Beavis said. Quinn saw those two coming. "If you even think of harassing me," she said, "I'll have Jane beat up the both of you into a bloody pulp!" "Did you hear that, Beavis," Butt-Head said, "she wants to make up popes!" "Will I get to wear that funny pointed hat and all that?," asked Beavis. "I said, 'PULP,' not 'POPE!,'", shrieked Quinn. "Hey, Butt-Head," Beavis said, "Do you ever noticed the similarities between Quinn and that chick Gabrielle from 'Xena: Warrior Princess'?" "Yeah," replied Butt-Head, "they're both dirty blondes, they both have bare midriffs and they both have big hooters!" They began their hideous laughter. "Score with us, Quinn!," Beavis said. "Yeah, score with us!," added Butt-Head. "JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANE!," screamed Quinn. Jane was there at a moment's notice. She got the both of them and kicked their asses real good. "Next time, you'll be in the hospital!," Jane warned. Beavis and Butt-Head were bruised up. "Hey, Butt-Head, does it hurt?," Beavis wanted to know. "Only when I laugh, Beavis," replied Butt-Head; he began to laugh, then began to howl, "OWWWWWWW!" While all that was going on, Highland scored a touchdown; with the two-point conversion, the score was now 10-0 in their favor. Meanwhile, the JAL plane was now pretty close to Lawndale. Ami has just closed the emergency door and made her way to the cockpit. She was hoping to contact the nearest airport, but then she noticed that after Akbar told the press about his hijacking the plane, he had also shot out the radio. This was only going to make the task of getting the plane down safely that much more difficult. But she noticed an even bigger concern: the plane was critically low on fuel. Ami raced out of the cockpit and got to the flight attendant, who was now topless since the force of the air rushing in from the emergency door ripped off what was left of her bra. "Miss, you've got to tell the passengers to prepare for an emergency landing!," Ami said. "We're going to crash, aren't we?," the flight attendant asked. "Perhaps we will," said Ami, "but right now we don't have many options left. Our fuel is almost exhausted." On that note, the flight attendant instructed everyone to prepare for a emergency crash landing. Ami then grabbed a piece of carry-on luggage she had and gave the flight attendant a blouse of hers to wear ; luckily, they had the same blouse size, though they didn't have the same bra size. Everyone on board thought that this was going to be the end. As was custom in Japan, the funeral was conducted by Buddhist rites; almost all of them were, since there are few Christians in the nation, and Shinto took a rather dim view of the afterlife. The Buddhist monk officiating the ceremonies was a friend of Rei's grandfather; at one time he was himself a Shinto priest. "We mourn for the death of this great man," began the monk; "but we must remember that now he goes to be with Buddha in Nirvana, to a far greater place than this troublesome world. His death was utterly meaningless, but he will now find the ultimate meaning to life, the Universe, and everything. Farewell, my brother in the faith." He then scattered flower petals into the grave, followed by all those in attendance. All of the Sailor Senshi and Daria were present. Except for Rei, they were wearing the usual Western black mourning clothes; Rei was wearing her miko's outfit. She laid into the grave besides petals one of her "demon banishment scrolls". Daria didn't have a simple black dress to wear and had to buy one from a store in the Ginza; it was one of those drop-dead minidresses and she was also suckered into buying a pair of those dark brown stockings that seem to go well with such a dress and a pair of high heels. Already they were murder on her feet. "Whoever invented high heel shoes must have been a guy;" she began to say; "he should have been strung up the nearest tree." Rei, after she left the grave, collapsed into tear; Usagi and Mamoru both hugged her. Daria stood by and watched. "I've lost everything that gave meaning to my life: my grandfather, the shrine, ,my peace of mind!" "You still have Yuuichirou and your crows," Usagi replied, "and you still have us." "You can stay with me until they rebuild the shrine," Mamoru offered. Rei cried bitterly. Suddenly, she left their embrace, grabbed a samurai sword that was hidden beneath her hakama and looked like she was going to commit seppuku; women usually did that by stabbing the sword through the throat, and not by slitting the belly like men did. "REI, NO!", everyone shouted. "No, I will not commit seppuku. However, I call upon Amaterasu-Omikami herself to witness my vows. I will not rest until the person responsible for killing my grandfather is finally brought to justice. Either this blade will go through the heinous person's heart, or it will go through my own throat. I will avenge your death, Grandpa, and I know you will not rest until I have done so! I have sworn!" Everyone left the cemetery chilled to the bones. Somehow, Daria had this mental image in her head of a hand emerging from a pool of blood, setting out letters that spelled out the word "CHILLER" and then sinking back into the pool of blood while an eerie voice said "CHILLER!" Somehow this seemed sickeningly appropriate. Everyone had gone to Mamoru's apartment for the post-funeral reception. Rei didn't have any other living relatives other than her estranged father, who she hadn't spoken to in years. She left him because she held him responsible for the death of her mother; they were driving back from a party and he was drunk; they crashed into a tree, killing her instantly. It was after that incident that Rei left him and went to Sendai Hill Shrine, ran by her now late maternal grandfather. There were some old friends of his and some students that Rei recognized from her junior high school days. Then there were everyone else's friends and family. Kenji, Usagi's father, went up to Rei. "I am so sorry about what happened," Kenji said. "Grandpa was such a beloved man," answered Rei. "He will be sorely missed." Kenji then recognized Daria. "There you are, Daria, he said; "I didn't notice you without the combat fatigues you usually wear. I have to admit with that dress on, you almost look human." "Frankly, formal wear like this isn't my style," Daria answered him; "I once wore this bare-shouldered dress to a wedding since I was going to be the bridesmaid, and I didn't like it." Kenji said, "Actually, I thought you were more the person who likes to wear slacks or combat pants, but you always wear that same drab olive jacket, orange shirt, black knee-length skirt and combat boots."; Kenji had seen Daria a couple of times since she came over, mainly when she stopped by Usagi's house for dinner a couple of times. "OK, OK, I'll let you in on a little secret," confessed Daria; "I've actually got better-looking legs that my sister, Quinn, but don't tell her about it because then she'll probably steal every skirt I own." "What about your sister, anyway?," Kenji wanted to know. "She's the vice-president of my hometown high school's Fashion Club," began Daria. "She kind of looks like Gabrielle from 'Xena: Warrior Princess' because she likes to wear shirts that leave her midriff bare and also has almost the same hair color and hairstyle. She's a complete airhead." With that, Daria broke into a rare smile. Somehow, with Usagi's parents, she felt at ease with them, because at least they knew what they were doing. Back home, her father was so wishy-washy and her mother was so domineering. Ikuko joined her husband. "There you are, dear," she said. "You should try this clam dip; I hear that Mamoru made this himself and it's pretty good." "Later, dear," Kenji said. Daria took a good look at herself in a nearby mirror. She had to admit that she didn't ever look as beautiful as she did now. What she really wanted to do was to fantasize how'd she look like in one of those armored bikinis like some of those heroines she had been seeing in anime since she came over. The day after she arrived here, Ami and she watched "Leda: The Fantastic Adventure of Yohko" on video, and Daria thought that Yohko's outfit was rather cool, if a bit sexist. That was the type of outfit she wished she wore, and not that frumpy seirafuku she had now as Sailor Mercury. Ami said that "Leda" was one of her favorite anime of all time, and admitted that she was an "otaku", or fan of anime herself. She thought back to what they were doing after they saw the film. They were in their bedclothes, and were gossiping in Ami's room. "'I really like Yohko, she's a woman who's true to herself despite the fact that she's an innocent woman trapped in a situation not of her own making," Ami said. "Well," Daria replied, "I thought it was a bit derivative of "Red Sonja" and "Xena", but otherwise it was OK. I just wish she didn't dote on that guy so much. She's got to realize that she can stand up on her own two feet without any guy's help." "Are you a feminist?," asked Ami. "Yes;" replied Daria; "I got it from my mother, as well as my science teacher, Ms. Barch. That last person is a real hoot. I swear every time in class, she says that 'All men are scum!'" Ami got a good laugh over that. "What's so funny?," Daria wanted to know. "It's just that your science teacher seems to write off men so easily," replied Ami. "In Japan there's really no such problems like that." "Really, then why are women still treated the way they are?," demanded Daria. Ami responded, "Oh, I guess you keep hearing the reports about how men are so aloof and treat women like property. But did you know how much power real Japanese housewives have?" "How much?," asked Daria. "Enough to make any grown man cry in his sake!," giggled Ami. Somehow, after the description that Ami gave about how wives made men stick to a little stipend from their salaries and controlled many aspects of their children's education, Daria broke into the biggest smile she ever had. But then she asked if that was the case, them why become a doctor. "My mother's a doctor," began Ami, "and her father before that. She told me how Grandpa was a doctor tending to the wounded during the war. It was pretty brutal business, especially toward the end. After the war, he set up a private practice, and encouraged my mother to take up the practice, since she was an only child and someone had to carry on the business. At first she was hesitant, but then she met one person who changed her life." "Who?," Daria wanted to know. Ami's answer was surprising: "Dr. Tezuka Osamu. I guess you know him from his works 'Tetsuwan Atom' and 'Jungle Taitei'". "You mean to tell me that the man who created 'Astro Boy' and 'Kimba the White Lion' was a doctor?" "Yes," Ami continued, "and he told my mother that there was no nobler profession than that of helping your fellow man in his time of need. My mother then decided that being a doctor was a worthwhile goal." "I'm impressed, "said a very impressed Daria; she was not one who was easily impressed. "My father, who's an artist, also thinks I should pursue an artistic career on the side," continued Ami. "If you ever visit Lawndale," Daria said, "you should check out my friend Jane Lane; she's an aspiring artist. Hell, her whole family is. Except her brother, Trent; he's a rock musician." "Daria," Ami asked, "you looked a bit embarrassed when you mentioned him. Are you in love with him?" "I'll admit that I am," confessed Daria. "It's kind of like the situation with Usagi and Mamoru. I just can't seem to get the words out, like he knows that I'm there, but he just doesn't seem to know." "Does he call you 'Dumpling-Head' at times?," inquired Ami. "No, nothing insulting like that," said Daria. "Hell, he doesn't have an insulting bone in his body. He's just a bit spacey, that's the major flaw in his character." Ami got a good laugh over that. "You know, Daria, you're different," replied Ami; "You're really honest about yourself and about other people." "Well, I like to tell it like it is," said Daria. Ami then added, "Daria, one of these days I will visit Lawndale and see all your friends and family." "I guarantee you won't have a dull moment there," assured Daria. Daria's train of thought was interrupted when someone turned on the TV. The NHK announcer was delivering the nightly news, and there was one interesting matter: "Tokyo-to Governor Nagai Kenji now has a commanding lead over his opponents in the latest NHK/Yorimuri Shimbun poll. Nagai, the Komeito candidate for the empty seat for Tokyo-to in the House of Representatives, now has a fifty-five percent approval rating as opposed to his Liberal Democratic, Socialist, Social Democratic and Communist opponents. Nagai's portraying himself as a "law and order" candidate as well as a reformer seems to have struck a chord with voters who are gravely concerned over the recent crises that have seem to hit Japan like a typhoon. As for the Neo-Zero crisis, NHK will continue to update that situation as conditions warrant." The sun was setting now over Tokyo. Daria had a strange feeling that she wanted to be anywhere else right now than here. She excused herself from the reception and went back to Ami's house. There she decided to go to bed. For some strange reason she decided to wear Ami's football jersey nightshirt. As she fell asleep, a strange dream began to unfold. . . The repairs to the Neo-Zero were taking longer than expected. Yoriko was clearly showing her impatience with the whole affair. "I want that engine repaired in the next fifteen minutes or heads will roll!," Yoriko shrieked. Dr. Vander Helffen sensed Yoriko's frustrations and went to her. "All will be ready in good time," he said. "Dr. Vander Helffen," Yoriko yelled, "I will not rest until that traitor Ryu and the Solar Warrior are both dead!" "Yoriko, you are beginning to lose sight of the goal," warned Dr. Vander Helffen. "We are to take over the nation first; later we will deal with those who have opposed us." "That may be your way, but it is not mine!," said Yoriko. "And you better have more of the 'Hi no Tori' pills for me soon or I will take matters into my own hands!" With that, she stormed out again. Dr. Vander Helffen realized that soon he might have to take matters into his own hands as well. Daria had the sensation that the alarm had went off, but she had just fallen asleep. She looked at the alarm and realized that she was running late for school. "AAAAAAAA! I'm late for school! First day! I'm late!," she shrieked. Then, it seemed that she took off her nightshirt and ran for the closet--wearing nothing but her panties--to grab a bra. But when she got to the closet, she fell through it and was falling deep, deep, into a hole. When she landed, it looked like she was in the middle of a bombed-out area. "Great," said Daria in her usual deadpan manner; "here I am virtually naked, everyone can see how small-breasted I am, and I'm in the middle of a war zone.. Right now, I bet some Huns are going to swoop out of nowhere and grab me." Just as she said, some Huns swooped out of nowhere and grabbed her. but just then, someone was standing in their path. "Ne'er-do-well'ers!," the man said, "I am the Solar Warrior, servant to Amaterasu-Omakami, Goddess of the Sun! In the name of the Sun, you will be judged!" Then he spread out his hands and the power began to glow in the discs in each hand. "SOLAR FLARE DISCHARGE ATTACK!," the Solar Warrior yelled. The solar flares streamed from his hands and burned the Huns to a crisp; Daria, however, was not injured. The Solar Warrior approached her. "This is kind of a bad time to see me, since I'm naked," Daria said. But the Solar Warrior, it seemed, summoned some solar energy and dressed her up in a seirafuku. "Do not be afraid of me, Daria," he said; "I will protect you from all harm." He seemed to draw closer. They were on the verge of kissing each other. They kissed, but then Daria was wrenched awake by someone shaking her shoulder. "Daria, get up! We have to go to SDF HQ on the double!," said a voice. It was Minako, and she looked like she went through Hell herself. She wasn't even in her Sailor Venus seirafuku but instead was wearing a green T-shirt and blue jeans. Her eyes had black bags under them for lack of sleep, and her hair was a bit disheveled. "Minako, you interrupted me in the middle of the best dream I've ever had for this?," said Daria rather groggily "Sorry, but this is urgent!," replied Minako. "Now I know how Samuel Taylor Colleridge must have felt when that insurance salesman interrupted him right in the middle of writing 'Kubla Kahn'," sneered Daria. She flung on a black T-shirt and blue jeans, the same outfit she wore while on her ill-fated trip to Alternapalooza. Somehow the irony wasn't lost on her. It was a weird dream. She never had such intense feelings for a guy before in her life. But her heart belonged to Trent, and she could never tell the Solar Warrior how much she cared for him. Daria was soon on her way to SDF HQ. The FAA facility near Lawndale International Airport was a pretty critical facility; its radar could cover a six state area. So there was concern when an aircraft appeared out of nowhere on the screen. One of the air traffic controllers immediately spotted that it was the hijacked JAL flight. "Oh, my god! The hijacker is bringing the JAL plane here!," he spewed out as soon as he realized where it was going. Everyone was now in a state of panic. The plane was nearing Lawndale. Since word that the attempt to stop the plane failed since the task force based in Japan was not dispatched due to the Neo-Zero hijacking, everyone was shuddering to think where the plane would eventually wind up in. It was heading for Lawndale. Phone calls were made to the White House, the Pentagon and to the nearest USAF base. Hell had come to Lawndale, and it was on board a Boeing 747. Right now, at 25,000 feet, all that Ami could think about was that fuel was now almost exhausted. The needle crept up to "E". The flight attendant came into the cockpit. "Everyone is ready for an emergency landing," she said. Ami then said, "You've got to tell me how I can keep this plane level enough to make a belly landing." "You'll have to grab the stick and keep it level," instructed the flight attendant; " But first you'll have to disengage the auto pilot." The flight attendant went over to the auto pilot and deactivated it. Now the needle was right on "E". The engines were still running, but within a few seconds, they began to grind to a halt. Ami could see Lawndale right in front of her, and saw that the plane was going to head right for a football stadium. The plane began to fall down, nose first, and Ami and the others were thrown violently toward the front. Ami grabbed the stick and tried to keep the plane level. Somehow, the plane was fighting her, though. "If I don't survive this, let the rest of the Sailor Senshi avenge my death!," said Ami to herself. Things were not going too good for Lawndale; they were now trailing 24-7. Kevin had just fumbled the ball and was now getting a good chewing out from Mack. "Kevin, you idiot, you're giving the game to Highland on a silver platter!," shrieked Mack. Kevin shot back, "Give me a break, Mack! I'm under a lot of pressure!" "If we don't win this game," warned Mack, "we might as well write off any hopes of winning the conference title, and perhaps even the state playoffs!" While that was going on, Beavis and Butt-Head made one more attempt to score on Quinn. "Hey, Quinn, let's blow this game! It sucks! Go back to our place and let's score!", Beavis said. "If you don't leave me alone, I'm going to do something drastic!," screamed Quinn. Just then, everyone heard a loud "WHOOSH!" Suddenly, the JAL 747 fell out of the sky. It seemed to be stable, but then it was too close to the stadium; it flew by it, and grazed a set of lights. The tower fell down. Everyone ran in panic. "WHOA! I think there're filming 'Black Sunday II'!", Butt-Head said. "Wait a minute, dillweed! 'Black Sunday' was about a blimp!", Beavis replied. "No, assmunch!," shot back Butt-Head. "That was 'The Hindenburger' or something like that!" "I'll blow up your blimp, asswipe!," warned Beavis. "Go ahead and try, Beavis!," dared Butt-Head. They got into a fist fight. Quinn tried to get away but those two saw her go, then broke off their fight and went after her. Quinn ran screaming. Ami tried her best to keep the plane level, but hitting the stadium lights didn't help matters. The plane was almost on the ground now. Ami tried to concentrate, but it was no use; the stick was still fighting her. "Pull up! Pull up!," the flight attendant screamed. "WE'RE GOING TO CRASH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" The plane hit the ground like a lead balloon. It bounced and broke into several pieces before finally coming to rest. Ami saw the flight attendant crash through the windshield and into a tree, killing her instantly. Ami conked her head against the stick and began to black out. "Not now, not now. . . . .," she said, then lapsed into unconsciousness. Anthony Corlew saw what happened, and took it for a sign. "ATTACK!", he roared. Now the Lawndale Militia raced forward and the various troops stormed City Hall, the Police Station and the Courthouse. Soon enough, since there was only token resistance, they had taken over all three buildings. Anthony boldly entered the Mayor's office, sat down in the chair, and propped his feet on his desk. "Gentlemen, at long last, Lawndale is ours!," he said in triumph. It was the bleakest hour in Lawndale's history. Data 8: Ami Joins the Free Lawndalers When Ami came to, she could see in the haze that wreckage was strewn everywhere. She was feeling groggy. There were flames everywhere, since there was some flammable material on board, and the smell of burning flesh was everywhere. Ami though her eyes were playing tricks on her when she thought she saw two familiar faces. She began to speak, though she still was a bit groggy-headed: "Usagi-chan, Mamoru, is that you? And if it is, why are you in that ridiculous cheerleading uniform, Usagi-chan, and why is Mamoru dressed up like a American rules football player?" "I don't know what you're talking about," Brittany said. "My name is Brittany Taylor, head cheerleader at Lawndale High; this is my boyfriend, Kevin Thompson, star quarterback for our team." She was twirling her hair again. Ami was now getting used to her surroundings. The moans of the injured and dying could be heard everywhere. The wreckage was scattered for about several hundred feet. At least the plane managed to avoid the football field. Ami now began to ask questions: "Where am I?" "You're in Lawndale," Kevin responded. "Are there any casualties?," Ami wanted to know. "We saw a lot of icky dead bodies around here! EW!," Brittany responded. Ami could see that there was a lot of carnage around. It was sickening. Ami felt like she wanted to throw up. She staggered, not noticing that she had a big gash on her head, the result of the tiara she wore cutting into her forehead when it hit the control stick. The blood was dripping all over her seirafuku. It was like something out of a nightmare, except this was for real. At least Akbar had been thrown out of the plane along with his nuclear device before it went off. That would have made matters infinitely worse. Ami began to count the small blessings right now. "I only hope that word gets out that I'm OK to my friends back in Japan", she said. She now saw the damage to herself. The blouse of her seirafuku was ripped, and part of her bra beneath that was ripped off, exposing her left breast. Her miniskirt was also tattered, and her boots were scuffed. Ami needed some attention. "We've got to have a doctor check you out!," Kevin stated. "OK by me," Ami replied. Ami was so overwhelmed by what she saw that she began to cry. She was going to Germany so she could become a doctor and help end people's suffering, but now she needed some of that attention herself. Somehow, she thought she saw a vision of Amaterasu-Omikami before her. She began to speak some words or encouragement to her: "My child, be strong. The world is in peril, but you and your friends will prevail. Thus have I sworn!' The vision seemed to dissolve. "Amaterasu-Omakami!," Ami cried out; "Don't leave me in my time of need!" She stretched her arms out to the vision, which had now completely vanished. Ami collapsed and began to cry furiously. Brittany herself was now on the verge of tears. She hugged Kevin. "Why us? Why our community? Why now?," she sobbed. "I wish I knew the answers, Brittany," was all that Kevin could say. The football field was all in confusion now. Everyone was on the field, tending to whoever they could find alive. Mr. DeMartino went to Ms. Li and spoke to her rather harshly: "I hope you're goddamn satisfied! You went ahead with the game and we just became the target of an international terrorist! I will report this matter to the State Education Department!" "If you do that," Ms. Li warned, "I'll see to it that you never work in this state as a teacher ever again! Hell, I'll make sure you can't work in this entire country as a teacher ever again! The only way you'll ever get a job teaching is in some straw hut in Burkina Faso as part of the Peace Corps!" Mr. DeMartino couldn't hold his anger against her back any longer. His right eye bulged out and he yelled: "Angela Li, you are nothing but a greedy, egotistical bitch!" With that, he huffed out of the area. Timothy O'Neill, the English teacher, was tending to someone who just went to cardiac arrest. He was performing CPR. A doctor checked the person over. "I'm sorry, but we've lost him," the doctor said. Mr. O'Neill stood there, the life drained out of him. He began to weep. Jane and Quinn were tending to someone who had a broken leg. Quinn took some wooden boards that were laying on the side while Jane took her jacket off, ripped it up and used the strips to bind the boards to the leg. Soon enough he was taken to Lawndale Hospital. In all the commotion no one noticed when a group of Lawndale Militia soldiers approached the football field. Anthony stood in front of the troops. "Now, people, we've got the town!," he announced. "Now, let's take its people!" With that they stormed into the facility, guns blazing. The charging troops lead to mass panic everywhere. In the confusion, Jane and Quinn were separated. Jane lost track of where Quinn was. Quinn was being jostled by the crowd. Then, suddenly, an arm jerked her out of the crowd. "Jane, am I glad to see you!," Quinn began to say, but then she saw who yanked her, and heard the hideous laughter. Quinn screamed as Beavis began to grope her breasts while Butt-Head grabber her legs. Those two picked her up and carried her off. "I'm gonna go home and spank my monkey!," Beavis said. "Yeah, then we're going to score!," Butt-Head added. Ami, Brittany and Kevin saw what was going on from a few feet away. "Oh, my god! Beavis and Butt-Head just kidnapped Quinn!," Brittany shrieked. Ami saw what was going on, and tried to summon whatever energy she had left to use her Shabon Spray, but the exertion was too much. She began to black out. Mr. DeMartino saw what was going on. "Everyone who can, retreat to the school!," he shouted. Many people did. The whole area was becoming a mob scene. Chaos was now ruling Lawndale. Beavis and Butt-Head had arrived at the bus stop with Quinn. Quinn was pleading with her captors: "Please let me go! I'll do anything you want! My parents are loaded! They'll pay you any ransom you want!" "Shut up, bitch!," Beavis snapped at her. "We're going to score with you, and you'll just lay back and enjoy it! I'm getting a stiffie just thinking about it! HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH!" Butt-Head joined in with his "UH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH!" The bus pulled up to the stop. Quinn screamed for help. Beavis, however, got on board, kicked off the driver, and let Butt-Head and Quinn in. Beavis took over driving the bus, which was empty. Butt-Head undid Quinn's bra and used it as a gag. "Man, you've got big hooters!," Butt-Head said as he looked underneath Quinn's shirt. Quinn slapped him. "OW! You bitch! Why'd you do that? I was just complimenting you!" Beavis drove live a demon all the way back to Highland. Lawndale High now had the air of a M*A*S*H unit. The injured were everywhere. Doctors and nurses were taking care of them. At the auditorium, all those who were able were gathered. Ami had her injuries tended to, and now was feeling a bit better. Mr. DeMartino was on stage, and he had a TV set on. The news was grim. The Lawndale Militia now had control of the entire town, and all but forty-five passengers had died in the crash, and the death toll was mounting. Bobbie Baptistia on CNN stated that the militia had seized the mayor, the police chief and the city judge. Things were grim outside as well: The report of the Neo-Zero theft and the subsequent bombing of Tokyo were given just a much coverage. Ami went into shock when she heard that. "My friends! Who knows if they're all right?," Ami wondered. Jane was also worried, since Daria was over there. "Good god!," she said, "I hope Daria is all right!" Ami turned around and saw Jane. "Jane Lane, right?," she asked. Jane was stunned; "Yeah, how did you know?," she asked. Ami replied, "I'm Mizuno Ami, Daria's friend." Right now was not the time to beat around the bush about her secret identity as Sailor Mercury; besides, they had taken off her clothes when they tended to her injuries and gave her a Lawndale High T-shirt and blue jeans to wear. "You're the one who asked Daria over to Japan!," Jane continued. "How did you wind up here, and what's happened to Daria?" "It's a complicated story," Ami began. "And I don't know anything about this Neo-Zero business. I didn't have anything to do with the JAL plane being hijacked, either, in case you were wondering about that." Jane took a close look at Ami. Somehow she could sense the spiritual affinity that she shared with Daria. Daria and Jane, after all, were the least liked in school, and it seemed that Ami seemed to be in that same category, or at least she had suffered some hardships. "Ami, you're not telling me the whole story here," Jane shot back. "What's happening here? What's happening to all of us?" Ami looked deep into Jane's blue eyes. She could sense that Jane really valued Daria even if the rest of the school didn't. "How long have you known each other?," she asked her. "Ever since we met in kindergarten," Jane replied; "My family moved here from Highland after second grade, but then Daria moved here a couple of years back. Not only that, she's got a crush on my brother Trent." Suddenly, Ami could see deep into Jane's soul. She could see Daria and Trent. She could see them about to kiss, but it seemed that suddenly Queen Beryl came out of nowhere and snatched Trent from Daria. "This isn't right!," she said, and began to black out. "It must be the medicine they gave you," Jane told her; "It's probably playing tricks on your brain." Ami felt that had to be it. She remembered that it was Endymion who was taken away from Princess Serenity, not Trent from Daria. but somehow the shock of everything was taking its toll on her. She collapsed. "Ami, Ami, are you OK?," yelled Jane, shaking Ami. Nothing was OK for her. She seemed to have been transported into the middle of a raging sea. She was now nude. Suddenly, it seemed every enemy the Sailor Senshi ever faced swarmed out of nowhere. "Now we will have our revenge!," roared Kunzite, and it seemed he had a long dagger that he flung right at Ami. Ami dodged it, only to bump up right against Ann. "I never got to kiss Mamoru, and it's all your fault!," she yelled. With that, it seemed Ann drew out a red hot poker and stuck it right across Ami's abdomen. Ami seemed to be screaming in agony. Sailor Galaxia came out of nowhere and seemed to rip open the heavens and the earth. Ami seemed to be sucked into a black hole. When she hit bottom, she seemed to be in an area that was completely dark. She was now clad in her Sailor Mercury seirafuku. Suddenly, strong, intense shafts of light appeared, and the rest of the Sailor Senshi stood there, with scowls on their faces. Not only that, but it seemed that Tuxedo Mask and Moonlight Knight were there as well, along with many of her other friends. "Grandpa is dead now because you wanted to go to Germany!" Rei seemed to scream. Then she brandished a demon banishment scroll and shrieked "AKURYO TAISAN!" in the loudest voice possible as she flung the scroll at Ami. "I think you had plenty to do with Mamoru breaking up with me five years ago after Chibi-Usa arrived," Usagi said. "For that, you will pay! MOON PRINCESS HALATION!" Ami seemed to be screaming in agony. "You're the real 'Dumpling Head' around here! You abandoned us! You betrayed us!," Tuxedo Mask said as he flung a rose dart. Everyone was yelling over and over again, "COWARD! TRAITOR! SPINELESS COWARD!" The voices seemed to be going on and on and on and on. . . Finally, Ami couldn't take it any more, and began screaming, "MAKE IT STOP! PLEASE MAKE IT STOP!" Suddenly, a bright red flash ripped Ami back to reality. It seemed that Mr. DeMartino slapped her across the face to calm her down. "Sorry, kid, but I had to do that to calm you down," he began. The TV was turned off now, and he went back to the stage. It seemed that he was going to make a speech. "I knew that the day would come," he began, with his right eye once again bulging out, "that something like this was going to happen. Mr. Corlew and his associates in the Lawndale Militia had been plotting to overthrow the local government for some time now. But I was not going to stand idly by and let them get away with it! NO! NOT I, ANTHONY DEMARTINO! I was prepared for this!" He paused to draw the curtains of the stage, and it seemed that a whole stockpile of weaponry was right behind him. He continued: "Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I prepared for this very moment! I managed to get some weapons stockpiled myself so I can raise my own little group and take back this town! From here on end, you are all part of the Lawndale Resistance Movement, or the Free Lawndalers for short. It is a shame that those who wish to subvert everything this nation stands for bully and intimidate the silent majority who stand by our democratic institutions. These so-called right wing militias and taxpayers groups are really wolves in sheep's' clothing. They claim they want to restore 'constitutional government' but in reality want to install a fascist dictatorship that would exterminate the poor, the elderly, minorities and the disabled. Is this what our Founding Fathers wanted when they established our nation? I tell you loud and I tell you clearly: NO! If we just stand by while the Anthony Corlews and the Timothy McVeighs and the Bob Schulzes of this nation try to subvert the principles of equal rights and equal justice, then we have truly lost the battle. These Neo-Nazis must be stopped, for as the old Latin saying goes, 'Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?'--'Who watches the watchmen?'" Mr. DeMartino paused and went up to Ami. "Young lady," he told her, "I sense that you seem to have abilities far greater than any of us here. We could use them in our battle. Will you join us in repelling the Lawndale Militia from here?" Ami was too groggy to say "No." "All right, I will," she replied. "Very well, then," Mr. DeMartino replied. "We will move out at once and retake this town from the enemy!" Soon everyone received weapons and began to move out. The battle to retake Lawndale had begun. Beavis, Butt-Head and Quinn had arrived back at Highland. The two boys opened the door to their crumbling house and threw Quinn like a sack of potatoes into a closet, which they promptly locked up. Quinn could hear them through the keyhole: "Yeah, we've got Diarrhea's sister now, Beavis!," shrieked Butt-Head. "Yeah, cool!," replied Beavis, then went into his "HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH!" Butt-Head then said, "I'm going to score with her first!" "No, dillweed!," said an angry Beavis; "I'm gonna score with her first!" "No, I am!," roared Butt-Head. Beavis yelled back, "No, I am!" "I'll kick you ass, Beavis!," butt-Head warned. "Go ahead and try, Butt-Head!," dared Beavis. They began another fist fight. Quinn could hear it going on. Somehow, uncalled, a memory flitted up to the surface of her mind. It was a couple of years ago, when she and Daria were still living here. They were going down the street when Beavis and Butt-Head approached. They began that sickening chant they made when they saw Daria: "DIARRHEA, CHA-CHA-CHA! DIARRHEA, CHA-CHA-CHA! DIARRHEA, CHA-CHA-CHA!" "Uh, Diarrhea, is your sister available?," Butt-Head asked. "No, she's not, you little perverts!," said Daria sternly. "Leave us alone!" "But we want to score with her!," Beavis said. They then made a grab for her, grabbing her by the legs (she was back then wearing that stupid red miniskirt, the same one she tried to seduce Kevin with) and her breasts. Daria then got real mad, and kicked the both of them in the crotch. They were sent howling. Quinn ran screaming to her sister, crying and saying things like "Thanks for saving me" and all that. Somehow there were unconfirmed reports that later that day Beavis and Butt-Head were setting off firecrackers and had thrown an M-80 into a dirt pile. It went off and apparently a kid in an orange hooded parka--who apparently was with his classmates from an elementary school in Colorado on a field trip-- was blown to pieces. Somewhere in the distance, the rumors went, a kid in a hunting hat was to have said: "Oh, my god! They killed Kenny! Those bastards! " Somehow, to Quinn, this wasn't interesting right now. She began to cry uncontrollably. She was the most afraid in her entire life. "If only Daria was here, she'd save me from this mess!," she sobbed. If she only knew then just how her wish would be granted. . . Back at the Kuriles, the repairs to the Neo-Zero were now complete. A fresh batch of Neo-Sidewinders was loaded and ready to go. Yoriko was ready to fly once again. But there was some unfinished business to attend to first with Dr. Vander Helffen. "I'm warning you, Dr. Vander Helffen," Yoriko began, "if you don't make a fresh batch of 'Hi no Tori' pills for me soon, there will be Hell to pay!" "I will make more, I promise!," he reassured her. Yoriko replied, "You'd better or else--" She made a cutting motion across her throat. With that, she climbed back into the cockpit and taxied down the runway. Son she was flying again. Dr. Vander Helffen turned to two ninja spies and said, "Prepare the Iron Cross armor for me. I have a feeling that I will need it." Tokyo was in a state of siege. The air raid sirens were going off again. At SDF Headquarters, the Sailor Senshi were preparing for the next round. Daria approached Brian Mackenzie. "You wouldn't have a cousin named Michael Jordan Mackenzie back at Lawndale, do you?," she asked him. "As a matter of fact, I do," replied Brian. "I know him," said Daria; "we're classmates at the high school." "How is Mike doing these days?," Brian asked. "OK, hopefully," was Daria's reply. But there was bad news about to be delivered from an NHK reporter: "This is just in from our international desk. A double tragedy has struck the American community of Lawndale. First, it seems that the hijacked JAL flight from Tokyo to Berlin has crashed in that town. Further, it is now confirmed that a right wing militia group calling itself the Lawndale Militia had now taken over the town. We don't have any casualty reports for either disaster as of this time, but NHK will keep on top of these rapidly unfolding events as they develop!" All of the Sailor Senshi were in shock. Ami was on that flight, and she may be seriously injured, perhaps even dead. Sailor Moon was the first to speak: "I know that this is a blow right now, and Ami's whereabouts are unknown, but we must concentrate on the matters in hand here. If Ami is indeed killed, then let this battle be dedicated to her memory. We swear that we will avenge whatever has happened to her on our own lives. Now, let's prepare for the next attack." Daria stood there in shock. For the first time in her life, she was genuinely worried for her family. Her mother may be domineering, her father a nebbish and her sister an airhead, but deep down inside, where most times she didn't want to admit it, she really did care for them. Daria seemed to let a stray tear fall from her face. Sailor Neptune noticed it. "Are you all right, Daria?," she asked her. Daria replied, "I'm fine, really." But right now she was fighting an inner tempest of raging emotions like she had never faced before. And God only knew how all this would sort itself out in the end. Data 9: The Neo-Zero Attacks! The Neo-Zero was beginning its next round of attacks. First, Yoriko decided to destroy a couple of SDF/USAF bases in Chiba-ken. Yoriko approached the control tower and fired a Neo-Sidewinder at it, destroying it. She then blew up some fuel tanks, causing a devastating inferno to engulf the entire base. She did the same thing with several other bases along her way. She then set a course for Tokyo. Tokyo was now a maddening sea of panicked citizens. Everyone was running like the King of the Monsters himself, Gojira, was running amok in their community again. The Mobile Unit of the National Police, the famed riot control unit, was desperately trying to keep some sense of order, but to no avail. The body-length shields were beginning to buckle from the strain of all the humanity pressed against them. Even the TMPD was having difficulties in keeping matters under control. Everywhere, the screams of those who sensed that they were to be condemned were filling the air: "We're all going to die!" "It's Doomsday!" "No! I'm too young to die!" "The end of the world is near!" "Prepare to meet your doom!" "Is there no God to save us?" Suddenly, the Sailor Senshi appeared. Sailor Moon stood in front of the rest. "Citizens of Tokyo, I implore you to stay calm!," she shouted. "Giving in to panic will only mean that the enemy will win over you with their fear! Please, calm down!" However, it was of no use. Soon the crow began to overwhelm the Sailor Senshi right where they stood. Daria was knocked over and would have been trampled if it hadn't been for the quick thinking of Sailor Uranus, who pulled her out. "Are you all right?," Sailor Uranus asked. "More or less," Daria answered. "It's kind of like those mosh pits we have back home." In the melee, the Mobile Unit and the TMPD were themselves overwhelmed. Later on, it was reported that there were several officers on both forces who were crushed to death. Chaos had clearly begun to assert itself on Tokyo. Shortly after the panic had begun, the Neo-Zero arrived. Yoriko started the terror right away by firing a Neo-Sidewinder right at the famed Tokyo Tower, blowing it up to scrap metal. She then set her sights on the Diet Building. She fired missiles at the chambers of both the House of Representatives and the House of Councillors, and a third at the middle of the building. Horrendous damage was wreaked on the building. For good measure, she fired two missiles at the Tokyo Dome, blowing up the roof and damaging a good portion of the stadium. Yoriko smiled to herself in a sinister way. "Soon, Tokyo will fall to the iron rule of the NIRAA!," she yelled. Suddenly, she noticed something on her radar. There were five blips on the screen; the IFF device indicated that they were five Grumman F-14A Tomcats; they had obviously been launched from a U.S. Navy aircraft carrier. Yoriko flew in the direction of the squadron closing in on her. When she got to visual range, she could see from the tail markings that they were with the famed Fighting 143rd Squadron, alias the Pukin' Dogs. She could hear the talk on the radio as the fighters approached: "Tango to Victor! We've got our bandit on visual now," said one of the pilots. The squadron leader, Victor, responded with, "All units prepare to lock on target and fire on my mark!" It looked like they were going to use the 20-mm Vulcan cannons on her since they were so close. Yoriko made a power dive as the bullets began to fire away. "Dammit, she's too fast for us, Victor!," shouted another pilot. "Angel up to 15 and prepare to fire Sidewinders," said the squadron leader. Yoriko saw them turn tail and prepare to fire their Sidewinder missiles at 15,000 feet. Yoriko used the HUD to target the five Tomcats, then programmed five Neo-Sidewinders at them. She calmly pressed the fire button and saw each of the missiles take out their targets. They didn't know what hit them. Yoriko sneered and flew back to the heart of the city. It was only on the most important occasions that a governor of a prefecture like Tokyo-to ever got to go into the Imperial Palace. Generally, the palace was only open to the public on two days in the year: the Emperor's Birthday and New Year's Day. However, Gov. Nagai was not making a social call to Emperor Akihito. The very life of the nation was at stake. He was now in an underground bunker beneath the Imperial Palace, speaking to both the Emperor and Empress Michiko; for good measure, the Solar Warrior was there as well. Gov. Nagai began to speak: "Your Imperial Majesties, Tokyo hasn't suffered as much damage like this since the end of the war. The terrorist who has this aircraft can virtually wipe out this entire city with full impunity! The citizens of our nation are now turning their eyes to you for guidance in this grave matter. We need some assurances that this evil will pass." The Solar Warrior added: "Gov. Nagai is right. The people are looking to both Your Imperial Majesties in this terrible time. Speak to the people. Tell them what they need to hear." The Emperor arose and began to speak: "Somehow, I wish that I could have avoided having to face a crisis like this. I have seen the reports myself and I have to confess that I fear for our nation. Do we want to return to the chaos that the regime that had once controlled this nation brought on all of us and the world?" "It was in this very room that the war council met presided over by my father, the Showa Emperor. The vote was tied on what course of action was to be taken. It was up to him. He knew that we had foolishly let the militarists control every aspect of our society, that they led us to this calamity. He had to do what was right. He voted to end the war. He went on the radio and announced to this nation that we had to bear the unbearable. If this group seizes our nation, and begins to carry out its agenda, how many more bombs will fall? Must we suffer the nuclear terror of the Americans, the Russians, and the Chinese this time around? We must not let those who led us to ruin destroy half a century of progress, of good relations with the world." He motioned to a nearby servant, who bowed deeply. "Inform NHK that I will deliver an address shortly." The servant bowed deeply again and left to make a phone call. Gov. Nagai said, "You are doing the right thing, Your Majesty." About fifteen minutes later, this was heard on NHK: "We interrupt our continuing coverage of the Neo-Zero crisis to bring you this message from the Emperor. Ladies and Gentlemen, presenting His Imperial Majesty, the Emperor." There was a picture of the Emperor and the Empress in the bunker. The Emperor stood up and began to speak: "Citizens of Japan: We are now facing the greatest crisis in over fifty years. There are those out there who wish to restore militaristic control and regimentation in our society. These extremists think that the old ways were the best ways. Those ways were not the best ways. They brought immeasurable suffering and pain on countless millions in Asia and the world. The primary weapon of these extremists is fear and terror. However, they can be beat back if we do not submit to our worst fears. If we stay calm and not panic, we will have won half the battle. Therefore, I implore this nation to stay clam and to display in the face of the enemy the calmness and civility that have marked our nation and our way of life from time immemorial. We must not let fear conquer us. We must not let the enemy defeat us. Together, as a united front, we will show these extremists that we will not submit to their reign of fear. Thank you for your attention." The announcer then said: "Please stay tuned to NHK for more developments in this crisis." A good part of Tokyo was now in flames. Fire, it seemed, was everywhere. Sailor Moon had transformed into her Eternal Mode and was flying above to survey the damage. Everywhere, it seemed, there was damage. She was now over Azabu-ku, her own neighborhood, and set down where her house was. Thankfully, so far it was undamaged. She ran in. "Mom! Dad! Shingo!," she shouted. Soon she could hear footsteps from the basement. Soon, Kenji, Ikuko and Shingo emerged. "Mom! Dad! Look! It's Eternal Sailor Moon!," Shingo said. Right now, Sailor Moon was not going to be coy about her real identity; she was too concerned. "Mom, Dad, Shingo, it's actually me, Usagi," she calmly announced. "No way! You can't be!," Kenji said in shock. Sailor Moon waved a hand over her transforming brooch and reverted to her identity of Usagi. Everyone was speechless for a couple of minutes. "Usagi, is that really you?," Ikuko started to say, stunned. "Yes, it's me," she confirmed; "I guess you should know the truth now. For the past six years, I have been fighting evil as Sailor Moon. Luna told me that I was the reincarnation of a princess who lived on the Moon over one thousand years ago and that it was my destiny to lead humanity to an era of peace in the future. My friends work alongside me as the Sailor Senshi, and Mamoru is Tuxedo Mask; they also were from the Moon Kingdom, except Mamoru, who was known then as Endymion and was from Earth.. In the future, Chiba-Usa will be mine and Mamoru's daughter. Right now I have to stop this madwoman from destroying Tokyo and forcing our government to give in to her terrorist organization. Ami was one of us as well; she was Sailor Mercury. But when she left for Germany she transferred those powers to Daria. Now I don't even know if Ami is still alive or not. I'm fighting for all of our futures here. Please, if you love me, you'll leave here and get to a place of safety." Already the tears were beginning to run down her face; Usagi was genuinely worried for her family's safety. She then heard footsteps behind her, and saw that the rest of the Sailor Senshi were right behind her. Tuxedo Mask was the first to speak: "Sailor Moon, is everyone here in the Tsukino household safe?" "Yes, they are, Mamo-chan," said Usagi. Everyone was in a state of shock. "It's all right, we know everything now," Kenji said. "You know, I have to admit that I still had lingering doubts about you until now, Mamoru. I thought that you were too old for my daughter and was making her a juvenile delinquent. Now I know the gravity of the situation. How can you forgive this foolish man?" Mamoru extended a hand and said, "There is nothing to apologize for; you just didn't know. And I would be honored to call you as a friend." With that they shook hands. "Now that we like you and all that," Ikuko said, "how can you help us?" Mamoru replied, "You know that resort you went to six years ago, the one that had the water spirit that I had summoned when I was brainwashed to do Queen Beryl's bidding?" "I don't know anything about you summoning spirits, but I do know that some strange happenings were going on there," was Kenji's reply. "Go there," Mamoru said. "You will be safe." "We will take your advice," Kenji said. Shortly, the Tsukinos had packed the bare necessities and took off in their car. "It is better for them until things are resolved," Usagi said. "Now, we've got unfinished business to deal with," Mamoru said. Suddenly, someone somewhat familiar appeared. Usagi swore she was seeing double. But there he was all the same: a man dressed like an Arab, with a scimitar at his side. Undoubtedly it was the Moonlight Knight. "Mamoru, you can't be at two places at once," Usagi said. "Sailor Moon, surely you know me, the Moonlight Knight?," he began to speak. Daria turned to Meiou and asked, "What's this all about? You mean that Mamoru has two secret identities?" Meiou said, "It's kind of a complicated story." The Moonlight Knight then stopped and removed the veil from his face. Usagi stood there in shock.. It was none other than Furuhata Motoki, the owner of the Crown Game Center that Usagi still hung out at after school. "Mamoru, can you explain what's going on here?," Usagi demanded. "I will," Motoki started. "It was shortly after the Sailor Galaxia incident. Mamoru had that close call with that disappearance while he was flying to America. After the incident was resolved, he approached me and told me all about you and the others, Usagi. He then gave me the costume of the Moonlight Knight and trained me in some basic fighting skills. If Mamoru was to disappear again or if the Sailor Senshi needed some more muscle, I was going to be the ace in the hole. And I guess that right now you're going to need all the help you can get." As to confirm that remark, the Neo-Zero streaked out of the sky again, and straight for the Sailor Senshi! The Deathgrip cannon was roaring at full blast. Everyone scattered. "OK, sister, you asked for it!," Usagi said. "ETERNAL MOON STAR POWER, MAKE-UP!" She transformed to Eternal Sailor Moon and began to fly right toward the Neo-Zero. Yoriko just sneered and started to play another CD in her player. This time it was "Black Monk Time" from The Monks. She was listening to the opening track "Monk Time" and was hearing Gary Burger's frantic voice: "Alright, my name is Gary. Let's go. It's Beat time, it's Hop time, it's Monk time. You know, we don't like the army! What army? Who cares what army! Why do you kill all those kids over there in Vietnam? Mad Viet Cong! My brother died in Vietnam. James Bond, who is he? (frantic electric banjo riff from Dave Day) Stop it, stop it, I don't like it! It's too loud for my ears. Pussy Galore is coming down and we like it. We don't like the atomic bomb. . .(shrieking organ riff from Larry Clark) Stop it, stop it! I don't like it! Stop it! What's your meaning, Larry? (another organ interlude from Larry) Ah, you think like I think. You're a Monk, I'm a Monk, we're all Monks. . .Dave, Larry, Eddie, Roger, everybody, let's go. . .it's Beat time, it's Hop time--IT'S MONK TIME NOW! YEAH! ALRIGHT!" Sailor Moon was flying as fast as she could. She grabbed her old Moon Scepter and pointed it at the cockpit. "You will not destroy our future, you spawn of Hell!," Sailor Moon shrieked as she prepared to fire off her Moon Princess Halation beam. Yoriko was hearing Larry Clark's frantic organ playing, then the chorus of "It's Hop Time! It's Monk Time!" "Blow it out your ass!," was all she said as she squeezed the trigger of the Deathgrip cannon. Sailor Moon began to say "MOON PRINCESS HALATION!" when suddenly hot lead tore through her like jagged needles. Sailor Moon fell helplessly from the sky and landed on the ground with a terrifying "THUD!" The rest of the Sailor Senshi ran to her, Daria being the first to get to her. "Usagi! Speak to me!," Daria yelled at her, shaking her; "Are you all right?" Sailor Jupiter kneeled down besides her. She gave a quick check of her vital signs. "She'd bleeding badly," she said. "I don't think there's even a pulse. We have to get the Sailor Star Lights. Only Sailor Star Healer can save her now." Daria became very mad. She raised her head to the sky and screamed, "NOW YOU'VE MADE IT PERSONAL, YOU BITCH!" She ran off in the direction of the Neo-Zero. "Daria! Come back here!," Luna ordered sharply. "Sailor Senshi don't drop everything to carry out personal vendettas!" "Let her go, Luna!," Rei said. "Since Ami's not here, I'm now in charge. Let Daria blow some steam. She'll be back." Mamoru, in the meantime, reached for his cellular phone and called the Sailor Star Lights. This was the only chance Usagi had now to survive. Daria, meanwhile was still running when suddenly, something smacked up against her head with a loud "CRACK!" She fell down, helpless. "Stay right where you are!," said an iron voice behind her. "Don't make another move!" Daria suddenly found herself surrounded by NIRAA ninja soldiers. She held her hands up in surrender. They took her away to a secret location near the Sumito Heavy Industries headquarters. Dr. Vander Helffen would be awaiting for them there. "Great! Now I've been captured," she thought to herself; "Wait until I send my next postcard. It'll say: 'Dear Mom, Dad, and Quinn: I'm now a POW being held by an extremist group. Please make sure to inform the Red Cross so they can send those POW packages. Love, Daria.' What a trip this had been!" Back at Lawndale, The Free Lawndalers had made it as far as the local YMCA and decided to stay there for the night. Mr. DeMartino was checking his AK-47 when Helen Morgendorffer ran screaming to him: "I CAN'T FIND HER! I CAN'T FIND HER!" "Don't interrupt me while I'm cleaning my AK-47!," Mr. DeMartino yelled at her, his right eye bulging out again. "Do you want me to shoot my eye out! Now, who can't you find?" "My younger daughter, Quinn!," Helen continued. "I haven't been able to find her since the plane crash!" Mr. DeMartino motioned to Ms. Barch and Ami. "You two, find out what happened to Quinn Morgendorffer!," he snapped at them. "I don't like taking orders from male scum like you, DeMartino!,:" Ms. Barch said. Mr. DeMartino pointed his gun and said "Well, my gun and I have a different opinion!" Ms. Barch took the hint, and left with Ami. "Male scumbag!," she muttered to herself. They left the YMCA and went down the street. Soon they saw someone. "Excuse me," Ami asked, "Have you seen Quinn Morgendorffer?" "You bet I did," the person began to say. "Beavis and Butt-Head dragged her to the bus stop, kicked the driver out and drove the bus all the way back to Highland, I figure." "Might as well get my car and go over there," Ms. Barch said. "I always hated those two creeps! They always make mischief when they come here to see Highland take on Lawndale. All men are scum, Ami, and don't you forget it!" Ami was beginning to see that not all guys were like Mamoru or even like Urawa Ryo, the smart but kind boy she met back in the Sailor Senshi's early days when they were searching for the seven Rainbow Crystals that formed the Silver Imperium Crystal. But at least she didn't think that all men were scum, at least not just yet. It was about 10:30 PM. Beavis and Butt-Head were watching TV. They were watching the reports of the JAL crash and the Lawndale Militia coup. "Cool! We're on TV, Beavis!," Butt-Head said. "Where! Where!," Beavis said, excited. "I think we're over there!," replied Butt-Head, pointing to the TV. "This is cool!," Beavis said, then began doing his "HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH!" Butt-Head added his "UH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH-HUH!" Then they changed the channel and tuned into a channel which was showing the newsreel footage of the "Hindenburg" disaster. They began their hideous laughter again. "Hey, Butt-Head," asked Beavis. Butt-Head replied, "Uh, what, Beavis?" Beavis then said, "Is this the Super Bowl?" "Uh, I think so, Beavis," was Butt-Head's answer; "It looks like the Goodyear Blimp!" Then they saw the airship explode and Herb Morrison say "It's burst into flames!" "FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!," Beavis said. "Cool! It's crashing right onto the playing field!," Butt-Head said. They began their hideous laughter again. Meanwhile, in the closet, Quinn had found a pin on the floor and managed to unlock the door. She slipped out--making sure that she had her bra back on--and slipped out of the house. "Uh, Beavis, did you just hear the door open?," asked Butt-Head. Beavis replied, "I think so, Butt-Head." "Uh, better check on Quinn," asked Butt-Head. Beavis got up and checked. When he saw no one there, he went "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! QUINN'S GONE! QUINN'S GONE!" Butt-Head went over and said, "Dammit, Beavis, now how are we going to score?" "I bet I know where she went, though," Beavis replied. With that they left to find Quinn. Quinn was out of breath when she reached the home of Tom Anderson. She rang the doorbell and soon it was opened by Mr. Anderson. "Hello, young lady," he said; "What can I do for you?" "My name's Quinn Morgendorffer," she began; "I'm from Lawndale. Beavis and Butt-Head kidnapped me and took me to their place. But I managed to escape. I need help" "You're Daria Morgendorffer's sister, aren't you?," Mr. Anderson asked. Quinn replied, "Yes, I am." "Well, I remember her," Mr. Anderson replied. "Smart little girl, she is. Do you want to call your parents?" "Yes, please," begged Quinn. They entered the house. But then, Beavis and Butt-Head saw them enter and raced for the door, kicking it down. "Quinn, we don't like girls like you running away from us," Butt-Head said. "Yeah! That's not cool!," Beavis added. "You boys have done the most heinous thing I've ever heard about. I'm going to call the police right now," Mr. Anderson said. "No way!," Beavis screamed. With that he found a golf club that was lying nearby and began to bludgeon Mr. Anderson with it. Soon, he laid there, dead in a pool of blood. "Cool! He's dead!," Beavis said. "Now we can do what we want with Quinn!" "You murderers! Don't you know right from wrong?," Quinn sobbed. "Do a striptease for us, bitch!," Butt-Head ordered. "Then, like, let's have her wear that outfit we made that looks like that Gabrielle chick's outfit from that Xena chick's show!," Beavis said. "NO!," Quinn shrieked. "You won't deny us again!," Beavis said, then clenched his fists and began to shake up and down while going "BOINGOINGOINGOINGOINGOING!" They moved in closer on Quinn. Quinn was screaming, "SOMEONE HELP ME!" Suddenly, there was a cold blast of air that hit the room. "SHABON SPRAY, FREEZING!," shouted a voice from the front door. Beavis and Butt-Head were frozen solid. Quinn turned around to see Ami and Ms. Barch in the front door. She ran to Ami and collapsed into her arms, crying. "I'm just glad you came!," Quinn sobbed. "It's all right. It's all over now," Ami said. Ms. Barch went to the now frozen Beavis and Butt-Head and sneered, "You men are all scum!" Daria was in some dark room with a strong light on her face. She was tied to a chair. Suddenly, a door opened, and Dr. Vander Helffen entered. "So, you're the new Sailor Mercury now, aren't you?," he said. Daria gave a rather stock answer: "My name is Daria Morgendorffer. I am a member of the Sailor Senshi. I am a citizen of the United States and demand to be treated as a prisoner of war in accordance with the Geneva Convention." "That will do you no good," Dr. Vander Helffen replied. "The New Imperial Rule Assistance Association does not recognize the Geneva Convention. In fact, when we're done, we will rule the world and abolish the Geneva Convention, the United Nations and all other weak-kneed organizations and treaties. Japan will be the undisputed master of the world. And now you will hear of those plans before we execute you!" Data 10: The Truth About Amazana Yoriko Dr. Vander Helffen looked at Daria like a teacher would with a troublesome but promising student. He sensed that he had her undivided attention. He was about to speak when Yoriko arrived; she had landed the Neo-Zero at an airfield near the facility. She stepped in and approached the two of them. "I guess you may know this individual by now," Dr. Vander Helffen said. "This is Amazana Yoriko. She is the nominal head of the NIRAA, but I wield the actual power in the organization. As you can see, she has bombed Tokyo with the Neo-Zero with complete impunity. Don't think that you and your Sailor Senshi friends will be able to defeat us; we are too powerful to stop." He continued, "And now I think it is time that I told you about myself, Yoriko and the aims of the NIRAA. Take a look at me: how old do you think I am.?" "My best guess would be in your late 30's," Daria replied. Dr Vander Helffen then launched into his exposition of himself, Yoriko and the NIRAA: "What if I told you that I am actually 89 years old. It is due to the 'Hi no Tori' Immortality Pills that I take. But I will get to that later on. What matters now is that you will hear about myself." "I was born to one of those old Junker families in the German province of Prussia. I witnessed the humiliating defeat of Kaiser Wilhelm and the Imperial Army at the hands of the decadent Americans. I swore that I would never again see my beloved Germany be humiliated. I went to the best schools in Germany and eventually entered the then young fields of genetics and cryogenics. When Adolf Hitler organized the Nazi Party, I joined and offered my services to the Fuehrer in creating the 'Master Race' that he sought to have. When the Nazis rose to power I received approval from the Fuehrer to conduct more experiments. I carried them out on the inferior Jews and crippleds." "But my greatest achievement was when I created the 'Hi no Tori' Immortality Pills. When the Nazis conquered North Africa, an ancient text from Egypt was brought over to me. This text had been copied from ancient Chinese documents dating back to the time of Master Kung himself and made its way through India, Iran, Saudi Arabia and finally over to Egypt. It was an ancient formula for creating an immortality pill that allegedly came from the legendary Phoenix itself; 'Hi no Tori' is Japanese for 'Firebird' or 'Phoenix'. Apparently the writer had been to Japan, where the Phoenix appeared to him in a vision with Amaterasu-Omikami, the Sun Goddess, and her brother, Susano, the Wind God. The recipe called for the rarest of ingredients, which even today are very hard to procure. But procure them I did, and created the first batch. I have taken the pills since I was in my early 30's." "It was the creation of this pill that led me to my next task: Creating for the Fuehrer a race of 'Ultra Soldiers' who would defend the Fatherland from the American subhumans and exterminate the Jews, crippleds, Gypsies, and other inferior races. I toiled throughout the War to create the serum. But, when I finally perfected it, the final assault on Berlin had begun, and the Soviet armies were closing in on me. I ran to the Japanese Embassy and they conducted me out of the country, but not before I found out that my beloved Fuehrer and Eva Braun had killed themselves. I decided to go to Japan and hopefully give to them the Ultra Soldier formula and thus at least help them defeat the Americans. However, the military leaders would not hear of it from me. Remember, they, and not Emperor Hirohito were in actual control; the Emperor was a mere puppet in their hands. I stayed in Tokyo and hoped that they would be desperate enough to finally come to me. However, the Americans soon used their atomic bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki, and the militarists surrendered." "However, that soon proved to be a boon to me. Shortly before the atomic bombings, I had learned that Gen. Tojo Hideki had an illegitimate child as a result of an affair he had with a prostitute who lived in the pleasure quarters of the Ginza. As soon as the American occupation forces arrived, I knew I had to act quickly. They wanted to seize the child from its mother as punishment for her infiltrating American lines disguised as a runaway Korean comfort woman and wheedling out secrets from the American soldiers, which she then told Gen. Tojo about. They wanted to take the child to the United States, put her up for adoption and erase any memory of her ancestry. They were afraid that if there was a child of Tojo's who was aware of his or her heritage, he or she might organize a new extremist organization that would take over Japan. I, however, got to the prostitute's home first, and promised the woman that I would take care of her girl. Soon enough, the American forces arrived at her house, and got so incensed that they could not find the child that they arrested her, charged her with espionage, and had her executed." "Meanwhile, I had spirited her away with me to Argentina, where I lived for a while. There I injected my first batch of 'Ultra Soldier' serum into her, but there was an unexpected reaction; the results were unstable. I was forced to place her in cryogenic stasis until I could create an antidote. It took me twenty-five years for me to do that, during which I refined the 'Ultra Soldier' formula. When I finally got her out of cryogenic stasis, I used the antidote on her, then used the refined formula. The results were amazing. She now can lift 65 tons over her head, has the endurance of fifty men, and is in better physical condition than the best Olympic athlete. I began to indoctrinate her on Nazi philosophy, using of course the Fuehrer's classic text 'Mein Kampf'. I had also sent her to the best schools in Japan; eventually, she got her Master's Degree in Political Science from Tokyo University. Yoriko has been raised since she was thawed to be loyal to me. I also have her on the 'Hi no Tori' pill." "And now, you will learn about my plan to conquer the world. As soon as we make the civilian government surrender to us, we will launch an aggressive campaign to take back what is rightfully Japan's. We will retake the Kuriles and Sakhalin Island from Russia; we will retake the Pescadores from China. We will reannex both Koreas and Taiwan. We will conquer Indonesia, Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, Thailand, Mynamar, Singapore, Malaysia, the Philippines, India, Bhutan ,Nepal, Bangladesh, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Papua New Guinea and the other Oceanic nations. We will then declare war on the United States, Great Britain, Russia, China and France and use nuclear bombs that we will appropriate from the seized American bases that we take over. After those five nations are humiliated, we will threaten to unleash more nuclear weapons on the rest of the world unless it submits to Japan. No one will be able to stop us, NO ONE!" "Yes, there is something that will stop you," Daria said. Dr. Vander Helffen continued unabated: "And what will that be? God? The spirit of the Japanese people? Humanity? Freedom? The Americans or the Russians? What will stop us, Daria?" Daria replied, "Public opinion will, because if you think the rest of the world is going to just let you waltz into power and start this mayhem of yours, you're even crazier than I suspected." Dr. Vander Helffen was aghast. He continued: "Public opinion will stop me? Are you serious? See what decadence is out there right now. The public is being sated by a modern-day version of the old Roman 'bread and circuses' tactics. This time, it's senseless media controlled by very few people, who make people watch trash that's full of lies, half-truths, distortions, colored opinions, useless trivia, promiscuous sex, wanton violence and degradation. You have celebrities and sports people who act outrageously and get away with it; further, not a month passes by now unless there's news of a shooting in a school. Do I have to remind you about the Latrell Sprewell incident or the shootings at Jonesboro, Arkansas and Springfield, Oregon? Is it any wonder groups like mine exist in many nations around the world? We're trying to restore sanity to this world. There are groups like mine all over the world: the National Front in France; the Neo-Nazi skinheads in Germany, the Neo-Fascists in Italy; even in your country there are the right-wing militias and the white supremacists and the disgruntled anti-government taxpayers groups like the All-County Taxpayers Association." "And there are weirdoes like Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols who bomb Federal office buildings and kill innocent people," Daria said. "Dr. Vander Helffen, the world you are dreaming of is in reality a nightmare; it would be a world ruled by madmen who think only they can be the source of law and order and that those who oppose them--especially minorities, the disabled and the poor--have to be exterminated. Hitler was real close to bringing such a nightmare world to reality, but he was stopped. Your dream isn't about restoring Japanese glory, it's about bringing a Fourth Reich to existence. If you think my friends and I are going to just stand aside and let you and others like you get away with this, then you are dead wrong. We will stop you even it it's the last thing we ever do." Yoriko got mad and slapped Daria. "You're just wasting your breath on her," Yoriko said to Dr. Vander Helffen. "You're right," he said. "Take her away to be executed!" Daria was untied from the chair and taken away. "Great, " she began to say to herself, "just a few days ago, I was worrying about Beavis and Butt-Head heckling me at the football game; now I'm about to be executed by firing squad. That's the sick, sad story of my life." The Lawndale Courthouse was filled with Lawndale Militia personnel. In the chambers a moot trial was about to be held against the Mayor, the City Council and the City Judge. Anthony Corlew was going to be the judge, with twelve of his closest associates being the jury. Anthony stood up and banged the gavel. He then said: "This trial is now set to begin. All of the defendants are accused of the following crimes: fraud; corruption; bribery; funneling taxpayers' money to welfare-cheating minorities and disabled persons; indoctrinating our children with poisonous politically correct doctrine while in school and encouraging promiscuity by having condoms available at the high school. The punishment for all of these crimes shall be death by firing squad. The trial shall begin." Somehow, the outcome was known beforehand, but they wanted to have this trial so as to look legitimate in the eyes of the public. At SDF Headquarters, Usagi was fighting for her life. But now there was another concern as well. "Daria has been gone for hours," Rei said. "She should know better than to just run off on her own personal vendettas." "Save your bratty attitude for later," Mamoru yelled. "Can't you see the woman I love is in critical condition?" Rei was taken aback from Mamoru's yelling at her. It wasn't too long ago, after all, that she was once his girlfriend. Then she found out that Usagi and Mamoru were meant to be together. She had her complaints, her arguments, and even her fights, but far be it form her to stand in the way of destiny. Somehow, however, it just seemed so unfair. She began to cry. "Rei, I didn't mean to snap at you like that," Mamoru finally said. "I just hope to God that Mako can get the Star Lights over here as soon as possible." Just then, a Ground SDF soldier arrived and spoke to Gen. Torymura: "Sir, you might want to see this. It's a video from a surveillance camera. It seems that Ms. Morgendorffer is being taken in the direction of Olympic Stadium by the NIRAA. I think they may be planning to execute her." "Mr. Chiba, Ms. Kaiou, I want the both of you to go over there and rescue our missing operative,", Gen. Torymura said. "You're asking Tuxedo Mask to leave the side of the woman he adores so you can launch a commando operation? That is pathetic," Michiru said in response. "It's all right," Mamoru replied. He turned to Usagi and said, "Usako, my love, I promise you that I will return to you. If, however, I lose you, I swear before all that is holy, just and true that I will not rest until the bastard who did this to you is stopped for all time. Twice you almost lost me because of my own carelessness; I don't want to lose you due to your own. This I swear!" With that, he gathered his cape around himself, grabbed the walking cane he had and departed with Sailor Neptune. Just then, they arrived: The Sailor Star Lights. Their names were Sailor Star Fighter, Sailor Star Maker and Sailor Star Healer. Sailor Star Healer's talents were going to be needed. "I came back as soon as I could," Makoto said. "Right now, I wouldn't be surprised if we had to call on the Amazoness Quartet eventually as well. The entire city is in chaos." "Where is our leader?," Sailor Star Healer said. Chibi-Usa pointed at her. "You must hurry," she said, "if she dies, then it'll be as if I never existed." Sailor Star Healer went over to Sailor Moon. She looked at her. "This will take almost all of my healing energy, but it can be done," she said. With that, she placed her hands over Usagi's forehead, and energy immediately flowed from her to Usagi. Rei got on her knees and prayed: "Kannon, Goddess of Mercy, spare Usagi's life. I know we haven't gotten along too well in the past, but I couldn't have asked for a better leader. This I pray." All Luna and Artemis could do was watch. "It's all up to her now," Luna finally said. "She has to pull through; if she doesn't, all will be lost!," Artemis added. Everyone was hoping for the best. Olympic Stadium was built for the 1964 Summer Games. Those games were to showcase a Tokyo that had been successfully resurrected from the wartime destruction that had wreaked as much havoc on the city as did the 1923 earthquake. But now it seemed to be a monument to past glories. Japan was in an economic slump, and the facility seemed so dated now. Sitting where Emperor Hirohito himself had declared the Games opened, Dr. Vander Helffen--along with Yoriko--were watching some NIRAA soldiers tie Daria up to a flagpole for her execution. As custom dictated, the soldier asked for a few requests. "Blindfold?," the soldier asked. "Cigarette?," the soldier asked again. Daria said, "I don't smoke." Finally, the soldier asked, "Any last words?" "I don't have any last words," shot back Daria, "but I do have this." She wrenched her free hand from the other soldier who was tying her up, and gave the middle finger to Dr. Vander Helffen and Yoriko. The soldier seized the hand and tied it to the flagpole. "How dare she do that!," Yoriko said. Dr. Vander Helffen now stood up. Five NIRAA soldiers were standing about twenty paces away from Daria.. He took a ceremonial Prussian field marshal's sword that had been his grandfather's and held it up in the air. "When I yell 'FIRE!' and drop my sword, execute her," he commanded. The soldiers loaded up their rifles. Another soldier began to beat a drum. "READY!," Dr. Vander Helffen shouted. The soldiers took up their rifles. Dr. Vander Helffen they yelled, "AIM!" They all focused on Daria Dr. Vander Helffen was now ready to yell "FIRE!" and drop his sword, but then a red rose dart hit him right between the eyes. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!," Dr. Vander Helffen yelled. Suddenly, there was another yell: "SUPER NEPTUNE TYPHOON, OVERWHELM!" Suddenly, a wall of water crashed down on the firing squad, sweeping them away. Daria noticed that it was all the way up to her chin. But then Tuxedo Mask came out of nowhere, grabbed onto the pole, and wrapping one arm around the pole and using his free hand, took a rose dart and cut the ropes binding Daria to the pole. Then, he took out his walking stick, which extended, and used that to pole vault their way to the stands. She noticed that Sailor Neptune was standing there, with her trident over her head. "Am I ever glad to see you guys!," Daria said. "Save the congratulations for when we get back to SDF Headquarters," Tuxedo Mask said. They made good their escape. Yoriko went over to Dr. Vander Helffen. "Are you OK?," she asked. Dr. Vander Helffen replied, "He got me right between the eyes." "I swear, I will get vengeance for this!," Yoriko said. "We will have the last laugh!" When Daria, Tuxedo Mask and Sailor Neptune returned to SDF HQ, Usagi was still fighting for her life. "Why is this taking so long?," Minako said, almost at the verge of tears. "See what your foolishness has done?," Mamoru said. "I swear, Usagi wasn't as obnoxious in the beginning as you are right now!" Sailor Star Healer said, "I'm almost at the end of my resources here!" "C'mon, Mom," Chibi-Usa was saying to herself, "Dad and I are counting on you to pull through!" It was then that Gov. Nagai, the Solar Warrior and the rest of the Nagai campaign team arrived. "Who authorized you to be here?," Gen. Torymura said. "I have the permission of both the Emperor and the Prime Minister," Gov. Nagai said. "If you want to file a complaint, take it up with them." The Solar Warrior saw Usagi's condition and knew he had to act quickly. He took out what looked like a small yellow disc and placed it on Usagi's head. "What are you doing?," Sailor Star Healer said. "It is a Solar Healing Disc," the Solar Warrior replied. "The very energy of the Sun will heal her." Suddenly, the disc began glowing, coursing energy throughout Usagi's body. Usagi was beginning to moan in pain, but soon the pain was finally easing. Finally, within a minute, all the injuries had healed themselves. "Give her time to rest," the Solar Warrior said. "She is out of danger now." "I think it is time you finally leveled with us and talked about who you are and how you came to be," Tuxedo Mask said. "Even when I was Endymion back in the Silver Millennium I never heard about you or your exploits. Are you really who you claim to be, or are you working for the enemy?" "I see that some of the doubts that Usagi and Luna have about me since in the beginning has rubbed off on you," the Solar Warrior said. "But now I will finally tell my tale. Take it from me, once you hear it , all doubts will be erased." Data 11: The Solar Warrior's Origins The Solar Warrior had the attention of everyone at SDF HQ now. He thus began to speak about his origins: "To begin my story, I must take you back tens of thousands of years, even before the Moon Kingdom itself was founded. It was the time of the 'Golden Epoch,' an era of universal peace and prosperity that existed long before the Silver Millennium. At the heart of this Golden Epoch was the Solar Realm, a kingdom that was governed on truth, justice and mercy. The Solarians themselves lived in a pocket dimension that existed within the Sun; my race was old when time was young. Our ruler and god was known as the Guardian of the Sun, but since our ruler was away on a ten thousand year journey to acquire knowledge of the other alien races that exist in this galaxy, our kingdom was governed by the Royal High Council, consisting of the High Priests of the Sun. Law and order was maintained by the Holy Order of the Solar Knights, and I, Nakajimi Tetsuo, was one of them. I was born to one of the most powerful families of the nobility; we ruled what we had called the Planetary Province of Terra, what you call Earth. The Solar Realm consisted of all of your Solar System. The Solar Knights were known for their even-handed administration of justice and acts of chivalry. Everyone who lived in our realm was assured that no criminal would escape, no cry for help go unheeded. Soon I was made the Exalted Commandant of the Solar Knights, and I was set to marry the Crown Princess herself once she and the Guardian of the Sun returned. "However, that was not to be. One day, we were on routine patrol near Pluto, when we received a distress call. 'Help! We are under attack!,' it went. Soon we heard a menacing voice. 'We are the Mecha-Dominion! We will absorb your world into our realm! Rebellion against us is useless!' We raced over to the outpost, but saw that it was virtually destroyed. We found a few survivors. They told us that the Mecha-Dominion consisted of cybernetic beings who implanted computer chip devices onto the foreheads of those they conquered and made into slaves to serve the Supreme Computer that governs their realm. They were on their way to Pluto. We had to stop them." "We called for reinforcements, and gathered our forces at Pluto. Soon we saw their vast armada: a vast fleet of ships without number; ships that all looked the same and were all in the same pyramidal shape. We fought valiantly, but their weapons were far too superior to ours. They had weapons that could destroy entire planets and entire fleets of starships. Soon Pluto fell to the Mecha-Dominion. Thus that was repeated with each planet. Neptune fell, then Uranus, Saturn, Jupiter, Mars, Earth, Venus, and Mercury. Finally, we made one last desperate stand at the Sun. However, the Mecha-Dominion Mother Ship fired a powerful beam, collapsing the forecefield that kept our pocket dimension inside the Sun in existence. All who were in there perished in solar fire. Soon all save I were absorbed. I managed to escape by self-destructing my ship and hiding out in a cargo box. I had managed to take some provisions beforehand. I was in there for a month until a squadron of the United Galactic Confederation Defense Forces rescued me. They briefed me on what happened. All but a remnant who managed to escape had been taken from every planet in our realm. I was the only Solarian still alive. The Solar Realm was no more, and I was the last Holy Solar Knight. I finally settled on the Moon--which even then had people on it--and settled with some survivors. Back then, after the Mecha-Dominion attack, each planet was governed under its own system of government. Earth had fallen into anarchy and chaos, while Mercury, Venus and Jupiter had become monarchies. Mars, Saturn and Pluto were republics while Uranus and Neptune had become military dictatorships. The Moon had become a republic with a strong centralized system of government; there was a powerful president and an equally powerful parliament and high court. Soon enough, the president had asked me to head the newly created Lunar Republic Security Force. I served in that capacity for thirty years." "Then, one day, the long-absent Guardian of the Sun returned. She stopped by the Moon and asked for me. I saw her at my office in Tranquillity City, the capital of the Lunar Republic. I still remember everything as it was yesterday. I remember when I first saw her, she said, 'I know you carry a tremendous burden in your heart. I know you lost everyone you cared for. But I want to make that up to you. I am the Guardian of the Sun, who was once the ruler of the now extinct Solar Realm.'" "I then asked, 'If you are her, then why did you abandon us?'" "She replied, 'I was seeking knowledge of all that live here in the galaxy. But now I realize that I have been derelict in my duties. If I had been here, I could have saved my people. When my daughter saw what happened, she killer herself. I know that you were going to be wed to her. I am sorry.'" "I felt such a great loss then. But then she pointed toward the Earth and spoke further;" "'Look at the Earth. When my ancestors, Izanagi and Izanami, created the Earth, the mud dripping from Izanami's spear created those islands you see off the coast of East Asia. On that nation, the gods themselves took human form and decided to live there. They call this land in their tongue Nihon, which means to them the source of the Sun. They are a vibrant people, but the lawlessness that permeates this planet threatens to overwhelm them. Already I have seen the terror that these anarchistic humans do. I have visited this planet in many disguises. In Egypt I saw the natives there enslave another race called the Hebrews who were fleeing from starvation. In the Western Hemisphere I saw savage tribes cut out the hearts of other people while they were still alive and offer them as gifts to their gods. I have seen lawlessness and disregard for the rights of others. I saw cruelty and disrespect and murder. If this is what the attack of the Mecha-Dominion has left, then it is time to correct it.'" "'By now you should know who I am. I am actually Amaterasu-Omikami, the Great Heaven Shining Deity. I am the Goddess of the Sun. I hereby say now that I will never again abandon my people. As for you, you can help me in this. I will give you the power to face these anarchists who wish to keep Earth in chaos. I know that you have developed a special affinity for these humans. They need someone who will hear their pleas for help. Whenever the widowed and the orphaned are oppressed, whenever the less fortunate are persecuted, whenever those who cannot speak or fend for themselves need help, you will be there for them. I will make you immortal so that you can always watch over these humans. From time to time, I will change your appearance so that you can walk among men. I will send you down to Nihon and you will lead these people through their transition to becoming a great society. That way, never again will I leave my people helpless without a savior to rescue them.'" "With that, she bestowed upon me the powers I now have as the Solar Warrior. After that, I left the Moon and arrived here in Japan. As Amaterasu-Omakami herself said, I was given many disguises over the millennia. I became Jimmu Tenno, the first Emperor of Japan. Humanity has also known me by various other disguises. I was once Saint George, the Dragon Slayer; King Arthur of Britain; King Robert the Bruce of Scotland; Sparticus of Rome; Michael Collins of Ireland and most recently Steven Biko of South Africa. Whenever the masses were being persecuted, there I would be, fighting to right injustice." "Eventually, the Mecha-Dominion attacked the Solar System once again. The attack was so devastating that finally Selene, the Greek Goddess of the Moon, decided that it was time to re-establish a system-wide empire. She took the best of her Amazons and the best men of ancient Greece, and settled them on the Moon. Since this time, the Lunar Republic was obliterated, they had to re-establish a nation there. Thus it was that one of these Amazons, Cynthia of Corinth, was wed to Telemachos, son of Odysseus, and thus the Moon Kingdom was established and the Silver Millennium was inaugurated. From them descended every ruler of the Moon Kingdom, even Queen Serenity. During Queen Serenity's reign there was another Mecha-Dominion attack, and I was called to help in defeating them. We were successful. A year after, Princess Serenity was born, at the same time that another person on Earth was: his name was Endymion, who was a descendant of Roland, the nephew of Charlemagne, who sounded his horn too late in battle for help and was killed by the Saracens. His wife Aude went into labor and gave birth to his great-grandfather; Aude then died from the shock of the news. About twenty years later, I paid a visit to the Moon Kingdom once again, and I met him. I even introduced him to the Queen and the Princess." "I don't have any recollection of meeting you then," Mamoru said. The Solar Warrior continued: "That was because you knew me then as Haakon Norjal, a Viking who had recently been converted to Christianity and was now using his fighting prowess to help others. It was I who introduced you to Usagi." "Now that you mention it, I do remember seeing a Viking that day when I first met her," Mamoru confessed. "He said that he had visited the Moon Kingdom many times over the past twenty years and got to know the princess very well. I think he said that we'd make a good couple. I have to admit that back then, Usagi wasn't as much as the airhead she still is to an extent." If Usagi was awake to hear that right now, she would have blushed. But she was still resting from her recovery. "So now you see," Tetsuo resumed, "I have been on your side all along. When I heard that the Moon Kingdom had been destroyed, I was stunned. For centuries afterward, I prepared myself for the day that I would see my old friends again. When the Dark Kingdom returned six years ago, I was ready, but then, I was commanded by Amaterasu-Omikami to prepare for a threat to Japan even greater than that. Little did I know that it would be the NIRAA. I promised Amaterasu-Omikami that I would stop them. And I hope now that I have earned your trust and can fight alongside you." Luna was the first to speak: "We're sorry if we ever doubted you, Solar Warrior. On behalf of the entire Sailor Senshi, we'd be happy to have you on our side." Daria was so moved by the Solar Warrior's story that tears were beginning to run down her face. "I see you are moved by my tale, Daria. You are crying," Tetsuo said,. "No, I'm not," Daria answered. "But then again, you have moved me. I must confess that ever since I first met you, I have drawn strongly attracted to you. You're unlike any other guy I've ever met. But I know that this cannot be. You see, I've got a guy back home in Lawndale that I have a crush on named Trent Lane; if only he'd know how I felt." "Daria," Tetsuo said, "Give it time. One of these days, he'll tell you how he feels about you. In this battle, we're fighting for everyone we care about. I know I am. I have a wife and son back home in Narita that I'm fighting for. I'm fighting for their future just as the Sailor Senshi are fighting for theirs. Remember, if we lose this battle, we lose everything we're fighting for: freedom, security, and family." He then rested a hand on Daria's left shoulder. "I can sense that you are a very special person. Use the talent that you have for good." Usagi was now beginning to stir. "Uh, where--where an I?," she finally said. "It's all right, Usagi-chan," Rei said. "You're back. That's all that matters." Back at Lawndale High School, which was being used as the headquarters of the Free Lawndalers, there was going to be a reunion. Trent was with his sister Jane, waiting for Ami and Ms. Barch to arrive with Quinn. "Janey," Trent said at last," I can't stand the waiting." "It sounds like you really care for Quinn, doesn't it?," Jane said. "Yeah, well, after all, she is Daria's sister," Trent answered her. "She may be ditzy but she's OK." Jane then said, "Trent, I know that you know that deep down in your heart you really love Daria. So why don't you tell her that next time you see her?" "But I don't know if there's going to be a next time," continued Trent. "Most of Tokyo's been bombed out. I don't know if she's alive or not." Jane could see that tears were beginning to roll down Trent's usually calm face. Jesse went up to him. "There, there, man," Jesse said. "Things are going to be OK." Trent finally broke down and admitted it: "Man, I really love Daria! If she's gone, I don't know what I'll do with myself!" Jake and Helen couldn't help but hear that; they were a few feet away. They both approached him. "You know, Trent," Jake began, "You'd probably think I should be telling you right now to stay away from my daughter. But right now, I'm beginning to see things in a different perspective. Major calamities like this do that to people. Heck, I always wanted to front my own rock and roll band, but then my father sent me away to military school. That was such a bummer." "Besides," Helen added, "I know you mother and father are pretty good folks, even if your mother likes to listen to rap music when she's making her pottery. Besides, Daria says you have a pretty good band. Now if you had some good management and some good legal representation, you'd be all set." "You're not making a pitch to hire you as my lawyer, are you, Mrs. Morgendorffer?," Trent said. "Not necessarily," answered Helen; "but it wouldn't hurt." It was then that Ms. Barch and Ami returned with Quinn. "Mr. and Mrs. Morgendorffer," Ami said, "I believe this is your daughter." Quinn saw them and ran up to them, crying. They both hugged her. "Oh, Mom! Dad! It was just horrible! Horrible!," she sobbed. "I know, dear, I know," Helen said. Mr. DeMartino arrived. "I see you accomplished your mission," he said to Ms. Barch and Ami. "Yes we did," Ms. Barch said, "and we asked for a female sheriff to arrest those two scumbags Beavis and Butt-Head." "Still hostile towards men, I see," Mr. DeMartino said. "Just remember who it was who kicked your ass after you cut out sports and clubs from the yearbook!," Ms. Barch warned. "Let's go home now, Mom, Dad," Quinn said. "I want to get some rest." "Very well," Mr. DeMartino said. "Ms. Barch, Ami, Jane, you will accompany them to their house and guard the premises. "You wouldn't mind if Jesse and I went along too?," Trent said. "At this point, I don't care," Mr. DeMartino said resignedly. "As long as you help protect Quinn until we finally stop the militia." Thus Quinn, Jake, Helen, Jane, Trent and Jesse left for the Morgendorffers' house. Beavis and Butt-Head were in a sheriff's department cruiser, being taken to the county jail. They were handcuffed and in the back seat, as was standard procedure. They were trying to get out of their handcuffs. "Let us out of these! We didn't do anything!," Beavis said. "And I supposed the body of Tom Anderson in the county morgue is still alive," the female sheriff's deputy replied. "You boys are going to get the needle for this!" "Uh, don't you mean the chair?," Butt-Head asked. "No, I mean the needle. They use lethal injection now in this state." "The needle! The needle! THE NEEDLE! THE NEEDLE!," Beavis said over and over again. The deputy grabbed her can of mace and sprayed it on Beavis, who went "AAAAAAAAAAA!" as the stuff stung his eyes like a thousand devils. "Shut up, the both of you, right now!," the deputy roared. The car stopped at a red light. Beavis said, "I've gotta take a whiz!" "You'll get a chance to go to the bathroom once we get to the jail," the deputy said. "But I gotta go now!," Beavis said. "All right, all right, " the deputy said, "I'll pull over by those bushes and you can go there. But no funny stuff, or I'll shoot you ass!" They pulled over, and the deputy took Beavis to the bushes. She undid the handcuffs. Beavis went and relieved himself. But when the deputy came to put the cuffs back on him, he was nowhere to be found. "Beavis, you come back here!," the deputy said. Beavis suddenly leapt out of nowhere, grabbed the mace from her, and sprayed it in her face. She was sent howling as Beavis got into the cruiser and drove off. "Hey, great going, Beavis!," Butt-Head said. "Yeah, now we're going back to Lawndale and we're going to pork that bitch Quinn for what she did to us!," replied Beavis. "Hey, Beavis," asked Butt-Head, "are you going to get me out of these cuffs?" "I will soon, asswipe!," shot back Beavis. "Just don't go postal on me!" They drove in excess of 120 MPH as they headed for Lawndale. The Lawndale Militia's trial against the city government was continuing. Already quite a few accusations--most of them groundless--were made. The city judge, for instance, was accused of taking bribes from the Sierra Club so that he could rule in favor of them in a lawsuit brought up by a property rights group in regard to conservation easements at a park that had a known endangered species of butterfly. The city council was accused of giving taxpayers' money to a private company that was developing an industrial park in the northwest corner of town. In one outrageous charge, the mayor was accused of bringing welfare recipients from New York City in to Lawndale so as to drive down property values, and was even accused of trying to turn over law enforcement to the UN Peacekeeping Forces. But it was only to get even more ridiculous. Anthony had the mayor on the witness stand. He was now saving his best for last: "Mr. Mayor, is it not true that as recently as this past August that you were having an affair with a certain Ms. Quinn Morgendorffer, whose only 14 years old, for God's sakes?" "That is not true!," the mayor said. "I only saw the person in question once. She and the others in her organization, the Lawndale High School Fashion Club approached me about selling raffle tickets door to door during Halloween weekend. I did not have an affair with her, and that did not affect my decision to grant the permit." "I have this picture that proves otherwise, Mr. Mayor," Anthony said. He held up a photo of him and Quinn at some restaurant. "That picture is being taken out of context," the mayor said. "We were discussing the proposed permit and the route they were going to take through town. You're blowing this all out of proportion!" "I've heard enough from you!," Anthony said. "I now hereby order the jury to deliberate this case! Until they reach a verdict, we stand at recess!" He banged the gavel and the jury retired to deliberate. Somehow, the verdict was known in advance, but they wanted to have the illusion that they were haggling over it for some time. Therefore, it took three hours of debate before they stopped for the night. By the morning, the fate of the city government would be known. Usagi was feeling better now. She got up in a sitting position and was being briefed on the situation as it now stood. "Right now," Luna said, "everything looks bleak. Every ward in Tokyo has at least 45% damage. Ruptured gas mains are causing even more fires than the actual bombings. Many SDF and American military bases have been bombed as well. Even now the President of the United States is considering sending in troops to stop the attacks, but he's facing considerable opposition from Congress. Our Prime Minister is holding an emergency Cabinet meeting even as we speak. The situation is desperate." Matters were not helped when NHK presented this special bulletin: "This just in from Lawndale, USA. A trial is being held by the Lawndale Militia against the government of that city. The government's been accused of bribery, corruption, embezzlement and a litany of other charges. The jury is supposed to render its verdict in the morning. NHK will update this situation when we receive more information." Daria realized that she had to get back to Lawndale--and fast. Data 12: A Desperate Teleportation Daria approached Usagi. "Usagi, are you feeling OK now?," she asked. "I think so," replied Usagi. "Why?" Daria answered, "I need to get back to Lawndale right away. Things are getting out of hand there, and I'm the only one who can fix it up." "I do have a new power that I was given recently," replied Usagi; "it's the Moon Teleportation Power. That might get you there quickly." "Usagi," Luna warned, "you're still not completely recovered from your injuries. You need to get some rest." "Right now, Daria's family might be in danger, and we've got to help her," Usagi said. "Besides, we don't know if Ami survived the crash or not. We could at least see if she's all right." Luna by now realized that it was useless to argue with Usagi when she was determined to do it her way. "Very well," Luna said, "but don't overdo it. You lost a lot of energy when you were shot down." Gen. Torymura overhead what was said. "If you're going to go back, don't stay too long, since Yoriko could be back at any moment." "We won't be gone long. You have my word," Daria said. Usagi got up and grabbed her old Moon Scepter with the Silver Imperium Crystal in it. "Grab onto the handle of the scepter with me," Usagi said. "Once I say 'MOON TELEPORTATION ACTIVATION!,' we'll simultaneously be sent over to where you want to go. The Silver Imperium Crystal will read your thoughts and take you to your destination." "Wouldn't it be just easier to use the three sliders Scotty always used on the transporter on 'Star Trek'?," Daria replied. "Daria, please spare me your flippant attitude right now!," said Usagi in disgust. Usagi and Daria grabbed onto the Moon Scepter. It began to glow. Usagi got an image in her mind as to where Daria needed to go. "All right, here goes nothing!," Usagi said. "MOON TELEPORTATION ACTIVATION!" Almost at once, it seemed that Usagi and Daria vanished in a beam of light. "Good luck, Usako, Daria," Mamoru said to himself. "I think you will need it." Almost instantaneously, Usagi and Daria arrived in Lawndale. "So this is Lawndale," Usagi said. "Yep, it's my little slice of Hell," Daria said. "Why is everything so quiet?," Usagi wanted to know. Suddenly, two Lawndale Militia soldiers saw them. "KILL THEM!," one of the soldiers screamed. The other soldier fired his AK-47 at them. "Not exactly the kind of welcome you usually get here," Daria stated, "but right now, my best advice to you is to run like Hell." They both did. The soldiers pursued them. Suddenly, someone jumped out of nowhere and threw a grenade at them, blowing them up to pieces. "Take that, bastards! See you in Hell!," the young lady screeched. She looked rather bizarre with her heavy eyeliner and was obviously drunk. "Who are you?," Usagi asked. "That's Andrea, our resident Goth girl. You know, she's into Marilyn Manson and all that," Daria replied. "Hey, Daria," asked Andrea, "when did you join the Navy? And who's the ponytailed wuss with you?" "I beg your pardon," Usagi said. "I didn't join they Navy, Andrea," Daria said. "It's supposed to be a Japanese schoolgirl's uniform, except that this is a superheroine's outfit. Andrea, this is Sailor Moon, and I'm supposed to be Sailor Mercury. I came over here to stop the Lawndale Militia from destroying our town." "Well," Andrea said, "Mr. DeMartino has organized a resistance unit and we're fighting back. Not only that, those two dolts Beavis and Butt-Head went after your sister." "They did?," asked Daria. "Luckily, Ms. Barch and Ami rescued her," replied Andrea. "When you said Ami," Sailor Moon said, "did you mean Mizuno Ami? She's a friend of mine. She's kind of short with short black hair in a bob cut." "Yeah," admitted Andrea, "that's what she looks like." "Where is she?," Sailor Moon asked her. "She's over at Daria's place," replied Andrea. "She went with her parents, Trent and Jane Lane, Jesse Moreno and Ms. Barch to protect Quinn in case Beavis and Butt-Head attack again." "We're there, dude," Daria said. "Huh?," Sailor Moon asked. "That's a phrase I picked up from those two," Daria added. They left right away for Daria's house. Quinn was in the shower at her house. For the first time, she was real worried for her sister. She didn't know if she was all right. "If she makes out all right from all this, I promise I won't deny that she's my sister ever again," she was saying to herself. Unknown to her, though, was at that very moment, Beavis and Butt-Head were pulling right up to her house. They got out of the sheriff's cruiser that they had commandeered. They got out and kicked in the door. "WHERE'S QUINN?," Butt-Head roared. Ms. Barch heard what was going on, and took her rifle, firing at them. "Get out and stay out!," she yelled. However, Beavis leapt right back inside and sprayed her with Mace. She was sent yelping in agony. "Get out of our way, bitch," Beavis roared. Everyone else heard what was going on and raced to the door. Butt-Head was running up the stairs with Jake pursuing him. "Hey, you! Get out out my house right now!," Jake yelled. Butt-Head took the billy club that he had taken from the front seat of the sheriff's cruiser and hit Jake over the head with it. Jake fell backwards down the stairs. "JAKE!," Helen screamed. Butt-Head went to the bathroom and kicked in the door. Quinn saw what had happened and screamed "NO! GET AWAY FROM ME!" "WE'RE GONNA SCORE WITH YOU WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT, YOU BITCH!," Butt-Head yelled as he dragged her by the hair downstairs. He flung her on the couch. Beavis maced Jake and Helen, sending them screaming in agony with Ms. Barch. Ami, Jane, Trent and Jesse all ran over to the living room. "Hold it right where you are!," Ami screamed. "After we're done porking Quinn, we're gonna pork you, Jane, and Ms. Barch," Beavis said. He then dropped his shorts. Quinn screamed, "SOMEONE HELP ME!" Beavis was about to drop his briefs when someone yelled, "HOLD IT RIGHT THERE, BASTARDS!" Beavis and Butt-Head turned around and saw Sailor Moon, Daria and Andrea standing in the front doorway. Sailor Moon began her introductory speech: "I am the pretty soldier Eternal Sailor Moon, champion of love and justice! In place of the Moon, I will punish you!" Butt-Head stood there speechless for a second. Then he said, "WHOA! Beavis, look who's here!" Beavis saw who it was, then they began their chant of "DIARRHEA, CHA-CHA-CHA! DIARRHEA, CHA-CHA-CHA! DIARRHEA, CHA-CHA-CHA!" It went on for five minutes. "How dare you interrupt me when I'm giving my introductory speech!," Sailor Moon said. "Sailor Moon, those two are Beavis and Butt-Head," Daria said. " I know those two from when I used to live in Highland. They're two stupid, trouble-making jerks. They make the students at Lawndale High look good. I'll take care of this." Daria went up to them and said, "Beavis and Butt-Head, if you rape my sister, I swear to God I will not rest until I hunt you down, rip your heatrs out, cook them on a skillet and make you eat them." Beavis said, "Fuck you, Diarrhea!" and dropped his briefs. "I've got a king-sized stiffie!" "With you, you need an electron microscope to see it!," Daria said, then grabbed Beavis by the scruff of his neck and flung him across the room. Butt-Head ran up to Sailor Moon, ripped her seirafuku blouse in half and had her in a chokehold. "You're going to let us go with Quinn or I'll kill Sailor Moon here!" Ami knew that her best friend was in danger. But what could she do? Beavis got up, grabbed Quinn violently from the couch and was taking her down the hallway. Jane grabbed a nearby fire poker and ran down the hall. She hit Beavis over the head with it. Quinn ran away, screaming. "RUN, QUINN!," Jane yelled. Quinn ran down the street, not caring that she was stark raving naked. "You'll pay for that, you bitch!," Beavis said, slapping Jane across the face. Helen was the first to recover from her macing. She got up and ran towards Beavis. "Get out of my house now!," she yelled. Beavis responded by slapping her across the face. For Daria, this was too much. She ran up to Beavis and kicked him and Butt-Head in the testicles. They were sent howling. Sailor Moon broke free. "SAILOR MOON KICK!," she yelled. She kicked them in the testicles as well. For good measure, Andrea kicked them in the testicles herself. Trent and Jesse sucker punched them from behind. Ami then grabbed a vase and broke it over Beavis' head. He turned around and hit her. Jake and Ms. Barch got up now. Ms. Barch knew she had to act quickly. Beavis got spastic and then went "AAAAAAAAAAAA! I AM THE GREAT CORNHULIO! YOU HAVE MADE ME ANGRY!" He and Butt-Head ran to the kitchen and grabbed knives, and ran, now completely deranged, right toward Daria. "DARIA! NO! THEY'LL KILL YOU!," Trent said. Beavis grabbed Daria by the collar of her seirafuku and was going to plunge the knife into her heart when Ms. Barch took her rifle and blew his brains out. The brains were splattered all over the place. "YOU KILLED BEAVIS, YOU BITCH!," Butt-Head yelled and ran to her. Ms. Barch blew out his brains as well. Both bodies twitched for a few seconds, then stopped. It was all over. Daria ran down the street and caught up with Quinn. She was balled up in a fetal position, crying. "Quinn, it's over now," said Daria; "Ms. Barch killed Beavis and Butt-Head. They won't harm you anymore." Daria took Quinn in her arms, and hugger her, letting Quinn cry on her shoulder. It didn't matter if she was splattered with brains on her outfit. "Daria, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm glad that you showed up," Quinn sobbed. "I'm very lucky to have a big sister like you. I'll never deny that we're sisters ever again, even if I get drubbed out of the Fashion Club!" Quinn broke down and cried. Daria patted her on the back. Daria smiled to herself. The others went up to her. "Daria, you're OK!," Trent said. "Trent, what's going on here?," asked Daria. Trent got closer to her and said: "It's terrible, Daria. The Lawndale Militia has taken over the town. They're trying the city government in a moot court. Then there was the plane crash, and we found Ami here. Then, of course, Beavis and Butt-Head tried to rape Quinn. It's all been so horrible. We're happy to have you back. And, Daria. . ." "Yes, Trent?," she aksed. Trent went up to her and said, "I love you. I always felt it, but until now I never had the courage to say it. After seeing you being willing to sacrifice your life to save your family, it has given me the courage to tell you how I feel." They then French kissed. "EW! They're kissing!," Quinn said. "AW, isn't that sweet?," Helen said. Jane just nodded her approval. She knew all along how those two felt for each other, and somehow she felt vindicated that she played a part as matchmaker in this affair. Jesse got a bit emotional. "It's all too beautiful, man!," he said. Sailor Moon went up to Ami and said, "Ami, thank Queen Serenity that you're all right!" "I've had a rough go of it, that's for sure!," Ami replied. "I've called the county sheriff's department, since the police are incapacitated right now," Ms. Barch said. "The coroner is going to take those two scumbags away. I hate all men! They're all cheaters and scumbags!" "I'm not a scumbag or a cheater!," Jake said. "Who asked you, you man!," Ms. Barch roared. "What's been happening in Tokyo?," Ami said. "It's not all good," Usagi said grimly. "The NIRAA has stolen an experimental jet fighter called the Neo-Zero and has all but bombed Tokyo to rubble. Rei's grandfather died when they bombed Sendai Hill Shrine. Things are getting desperate over there. What about here?" "Well," Ami said, "you heard it from Trent. A right-wing militia group has seized control here. It's a war zone here." "Daria," Jane asked, "how did you get mixed up in all this?," Daria answereed her: "Ami asked me to take her place as Sailor Mercury when she got accepted for her pre-med studies in Germany. Then the Neo-Zero affair broke out, and I got involved in it big time. It hasn't been a bowl of cherries, to say the least." Daria then went to Sailor Moon and Ami. "I guess introductions are in order now. Sailor Moon, Ami, I want you to meet my parents Jake and Helen Morgendorffer, my sister Quinn, my best friend Jane Lane, her brother and my boyfriend Trent, his friend Jesse Moreno, my science teacher Janet Barch, and Andrea, our local Goth girl. Everyone, this is Sailor Moon, and her friend Mizuno Ami." Everyone shook hands with each other. "We've got our work cut out for us here and back in Japan!," Sailor Moon said. "We've got to free Lawndale, then stop the NIRAA back in Japan!" Everyone vowed that they'd help each other resolve both crises. They then set out to return to the Free Lawndaler's base camp. The jury had reached a verdict in the trial. They filed in. Anthony asked the foreman if they had reached a verdict. "We have, Your Honor," the foreman said. "We find all the defendants guilty of all the charges against them." "Very well," Anthony said. "You are all hereby sentenced to be executed by firing squad at the middle of Town Park at noon. This court is adjourned!" The guards dragged the guilty parties away to be executed. Unless something happened soon, all would be lost. Data 13: Crush! Kill! Destroy!, or The Battle of Lawndale Tokyo looked like it had never been rebuilt from either the American bombings of 1945 or the 1923 Kanto Earthquake. Corpses were everywhere, with rats picking them clean to the bones. Fires were still raging out of control. And about 15,000 feet above the carnage was the reason why all this was happening: The Mitsubishi Neo-Zero prototype. Yoriko was on what she was hoping would be her final bombing run. One of the three drop tanks had been replaced by a sarin "Super Bomb" that she intended to drop on the Imperial Palace itself. If the Imperial Family was killed, the NIRAA would then step in unopposed as the rulers of Japan. "Fifty-three years of waiting will soon come to an end!," Yoriko said. Right now her CD player had Soundgarden's "Superunknown" CD in it and it was playing "Black Hole Sun": "In my eyes/Indisposed/In disguise/As no one knows/hides the face/lies, the snake/The Sun/In my disgrace/Boiling heat/Summer stench/'Neath the black/The sky looks dead/Call my name/Through the cream/And I'll hear you/Scream again/Black hole Sun/Won't you come/And wash away the rain/Black hole sun/Won't you come?/Won't you come?/Won't you come?" Somehow, if they were playing this song right now in the middle of Tokyo with the black hole sun sucking up everything, it would have been sickeningly appropriate. Yoriko set her sights on making a few more bombings. Back at SDF HQ, Gen. Torymura and Ryu were trying to use their undermanned forces as best as they can. A considerable amount of casualties had been rendered on Ground, Sea and Air SDF units, as well as JSIB agents and a considerable amount of USA, USN, USMC and USAF troops. Urgent messages had been forwarded to the American, French, Russian and Taiwanese presidents as well as the Canadian, British, German, Italian and even the Chinese prime ministers. The South Korean president and the North Korean premier--who rarely agreed on anything--had agreed to jointly defend their respective nations if the crisis spilled into their area. Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, Mynamar, Thailand, India, Nepal, Bhutan, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Afghanistan, Indonesia, the Philippines, Papua New Guinea, Australia and all the various Oceanic nations had all declared states of emergency. The UN Security Council was meeting in emergency session. The American Congress was also meeting in emergency session, as well as the British, Canadian, French and Russian parliaments. The situation was teetering on the edge of World War III. "Never before have I seen this nation in crisis like this," Gen. Torymura said. "We may not survive this dark night of despair." Tuxedo Mask went to him and said, "General, they always say that it's darkest before the dawn. The Sailor Senshi and I have fought against worse odds than this and prevailed. Many a time it seemed that the entire planet would fall to the forces of evil, but we prevailed. This is not the time to despair." Gen. Torymura then realized he did have an ace in the hole. He ordered a Ground SDF private to approach him at once. "Private," Gen. Torymura said as he took out a pen and paper, "Call this number and get in touch with a Mr. Hamada Ieyasu. He may be our nation's last hope." "Right away, Sir!," the private said, saluted, and proceeded to the nearest phone. Gen. Torymura turned to Tuxedo Mask. "Mr. Chiba," he began to say, "There has been a secret I have been keeping to myself for fifteen years, and if I don't survive this, I want it to be known now. This situation has brought this to the surface, and now I think it should be made public. I guess you remember that incident where the Soviet MiG shot down the KAL flight that had wandered into Soviet airspace." Mamoru replied, "I think we all do, General." Gen. Torymura continued: "I was a recently commissioned Flight Lieutenant back in 1983 and was in charge of a squadron near Sapporo, not too far from where the incident occurred. We were on routine patrol and noticed the two aircraft near our position. We went to investigate and saw the whole incident happen. We could not retaliate due to the Article 9 prohibitions. Later on, I saw two names on that list: my sister Torymura Keiko and my brother-in-law Kino Jimmu. If I had only had done something then, they would still be alive now. The board of inquiry that investigated the affair cleared my squadron from negligence, but I still feel I have moral responsibility for what happened." "Did your sister and brother-in-law have any children?," asked Mamoru. "They had one daughter, Makoto," replied Gen. Torymura. Tuxedo Mask stood there with his mouth wide open. "Do you know her, Mr. Chiba?, asked Gen. Torymura. Tuxedo Mask answered, "Yes, I do." He ran to Sailor Jupiter and brought her over. "What's the meaning of this, Mamoru?," she asked. "Gen. Torymura," Mamoru said, "tell Makoto what you told me." "Makoto, I am your uncle," Gen. Torymura began; "I was on patrol that day when your parents died in the Soviet attack on the KAL aircraft and saw what happened. I know I should have done something, but we were bound by our oath to observe Article 9 at all times. I understand if you can't find any room in your heart to forgive me." Makoto, however, suddenly flung her arms open, embraced her uncle and cried. "If I only knew sooner that I had living relatives!," Makoto cried. "Now you have a family again," replied Gen. Torymura. "When this is all over, you will meet your aunt and your two cousins. One, a boy, is a senior at Shinjuku Boys' Academy; the other, a woman, is a sophomore at Tokyo University majoring in economics. You can move in with us and we'll take care of you. You don't have to be lonely anymore." The other Sailor Senshi had gathered around to witness this reunion. "Right now," Rei said, "I am so happy for you. It is ironic that the same event that robbed me of my family has restored yours. My blessings go with you, Mako-chan." After the reunion, Tuxedo Mask was ready to get back to business. "OK, as acting leader in Usagi's absence, we've got to prepare for the worst. All of the Sailor Senshi are to go to the Imperial Palace. You are to defend it at all costs. I will wait here for Usagi's return with Daria. Is that understood? Since neither Ami or Daria are here, I'm naming you as field commander, Rei. Now, move out and protect the Emperor. As it was said during the Meiji Restoration, let it be said now: 'Honor the Emperor and expel the barbarians.'" The Sailor Senshi moved out. "You heard the man, people," Gen. Torymura said to the ragtag remnants of the SDF, "Move it! The Emperor is to be protected at all costs! Go now and protect our democratic way of life, even knowing that if your life is snuffed as the flower of the cherry blossom, at least you will go to wherever fate sends you in peace with yourselves that you have defended Emperor, government and country. If you are willing to sacrifice your lives, do it to protect your families, to protect our civilian government, to protect all that we value in our nation. BANZAI! BANZAI! BANZAI!" With that, the troops cheered "BANZAI!" They then donned a new headband. It was red with a depiction of the Japanese flag on it. The kanakaji characters on it said: "To protect freedom and democracy." All somehow knew that if lives were to be sacrificed this time, as of the Kamikaze pilots of the previous conflict, at least they were doing this now to protect a free, democratic Japan that was committed to peace, not to appease militarists who were land hungry and had cowed their Emperor into silent assent. Why many American veterans still held the Showa Emperor responsible for what happened was puzzling; did he not, after all, secretly disagree with almost all of their actions? Even if their Emperor was not a god, at least he now stood as a champion of decency, order and democracy against those who would plunge all of Asia into turmoil again. Now they realized what had went wrong for the past fifty-three years. Mistakes had to be admitted and repaired. After that, Japan had to strive better to fit into the international community. Good relations had to be made with those it had once vanquished. Perhaps someday, after the Communist regime in Beijing collapsed--and it was an article of faith that it would someday--and the democratic government in Taipei had taken over, perhaps then both nations would encourage the rest of East Asia and Southeast Asia to form some sort of NATO-like organization to defend themselves from threats like this. Peace was the way of the future. Even someday, perhaps Russia and other former Soviet nations would join their old Warsaw Pact allies in NATO as a united front for peace. The threat was no longer from major nations like Russia or China, but from rogue states like Iraq, Libya and Iran, and terrorist groups like the NIRAA, Islamic Jihad and the IRA. Since the war, patriotism did not count for much in Japan, which was committed to international peace and friendship. But now it was realized that one could still find pride in one's nation and still commit that nation to peace and prosperity to all nations. In this day and age, would not a nation's great achievements be shared by all? For over a century and a half Japan stood as the one nation in what the rest of the world called the "Third World" as a model for modernization and development. But it had been reluctant to share that knowledge, and others afraid of them. Now, if it survives this calamity, it would find a new purpose, a new meaning for itself. The best patriotism now was to spread the gospel of success, prosperity and modernization to those who were still in the dark. It did not have to be by bullets or napalm, but by technology and progress. Thus, with this new sense of purpose the SDF troops find themselves singing "Kimigayo," the national anthem. This song essentially was sung only at the start of sumo wrestling tournaments; it wasn't even played at the start of baseball games (team fight songs being played instead). Thus a chorus of voices found new meaning to those old words: "Kimigayo wa, Chiyo ni/Yachiyo ni Sazare ishi no, Iwao to nari te/Koke no musu made." Translated into English, the words ran: "May thy peaceful reign last long!/May it last for thousands of years,/Until this tiny stone will grow into a massive rock/And the moss will cover it all deep and thick." The SDF was preparing to take back their nation from those who were determined to destroy it, but this time, they were doing it for a civilian government, dedicated to the precepts of democracy and peace. Gen. Torymura and Ryu stood there, seeing the troops leaving. "Are we witnessing the start of a new era for Japan, or the beginning of the end?," Ryu said. "A few years ago," began Gen. Torymura, "I saw a film from anime master Oshii Mamoru. It was called 'Patlabor 2: The Movie.' In the film, a madman tried to stage a military coup and take over Japan, but the Special Vehicles Section 2 stopped them. I can only hope that the SDF will be able to stop them, for if they fail, we've lost this war." Those thought remained with him even as the last of the troops left. Lawndale City Park was jammed with people. Most of them were members of the Lawndale Militia, but there were some curiosity seekers as well. The mayor, city council and city judge were all bound and gagged and lined up for the firing squad to shoot at them. Anthony got in front of them and made this declaration: "As of this moment, I declare myself to be dictator of the city. As my first decree, I declare martial law and a curfew from 6:00 PM to 6:00 AM everyday until further notice. All laws will be promulgated by me after conferring with my War Council. Anyone who dares defy any laws made by me will be shot right where they are. After this execution is carried out, everyone is to go back to their homes." Anthony got out of the way. The firing squad then loaded their rifles. "READY!," Anthony said. The firing squad had their rifles at the ready. "AIM!," Anthony now shouted. They now aimed. Suddenly, someone screamed "ATTACK!" It was Mr. DeMartino and the Lawndale Militia. They were in hiding in buildings surrounding the park and now charged like madmen, their machine guns blazing. "NO!," Anthony screamed. "Not now! Not at my moment of triumph!" Sailor Moon, in Eternal Mode, now swooped out of the skies like a fighter craft. She had a machine gun, and was firing it like crazy. The Lawndale Militia now scattered. "Don't just stand there," Anthony said to the firing squad, "FIRE!" But then, two voices yelled out, "SHABON SPRAY, FREEZING!" The firing squad was frozen solid. Daria and Ami emerged out of their positions and ran to free the condemned prisoners. "We've got to retreat, Commander!," Poindexter said. Anthony responded by taking his .45 Magnum and blowing Poindexter's brains out. "Anyone who retreats will be shot!," he yelled. "So, you're the man who's caused all this misery!," Sailor Moon said. "I won't allow you to continue! I am the pretty soldier Eternal Sailor Moon, Princess of the Moon Kingdom, future Queen of Crystal Tokyo, champion of love and justice, and your worst nightmare! In place of the Moon, I will punish you!" "I won't let you stop me when I'm this close to fulfilling my dreams!,." Anthony yelled. With that, he grabbed a bazooka and fired it right at Sailor Moon. She flew out of the way as the rocket hit a nearby truck. Anthony then fired another rocket, then another, and another, causing Sailor Moon to dodge them like crazy. "You can't keep this up forever, you know!," Anthony said. Sailor Moon knew he was right. She was beginning to tire. Daria knew that something had to be done. The National Guard troops that Mr. DeMartino contacted wouldn't arrive for two hours yet, and they had to hold the Lawndale Militia at bay until then. All seemed hopeless until Ami came up with an idea. "Daria, I'll try to draw some of that fire from Usagi," she said. "You go and free the prisoners." Daria ran to the prisoners and undid their binds. "Run, get out of here!," she yelled. They ran to safety. Ami was beginning to draw Anthony's fire. "Save yourself, Ami! I've got to stop him!," Usagi yelled. "You're our leader!," Ami said. "I'm sworn to protect you at all costs!" Daria then thought up of a plan of her own. She stood right in front of Anthony, who was about to fire another rocket from the bazooka. "SHABON SPRAY, FREEZING!," she yelled. Suddenly, the front end of the bazooka was frozen solid. Anthony had just pressed the trigger, and not being a fool, flung the thing out of the way as the rocket hit the ice and exploded the weapon to atoms. "WE'LL BE BACK!," he roared, and then fled with the others. For now, the Free Lawndalers had retaken the downtown area. "That was pretty brave of you to do that," Sailor Moon said. "I just had to do what I had to do," Daria replied. Mr. DeMartino gathered the Free Lawndalers around him and said: "We may have won control of the downtown area, but the enemy still has control of the outside areas. We have to prepare ourselves for another attack." Daria realized that the next battle will either mean the liberation of Lawndale or the beginning of a dark age not just for Lawndale, but for the rest of the nation as well. Back at the Lawndale Gun Club, Anthony now was trying to rally the troops: "We have suffered a minor setback. But now it's time to finish the job we started. I'm going to authorize all of you to use the sarin grenades that I managed to acquire from some El Salvadoran death squads. You are hereby authorized to use these weapons in any means necessary to finally obliterate the enemy. Lawndale will be ours!" Everyone yelled "DEATH TO THE ENEMY!" Yoriko was now flying over Yokohama, the port that served Tokyo. She had bombed many critical port facilities and factories. Flames were everywhere. almost every critical military base that could be of help was obliterated. Yoriko was now heading for Tokyo proper and the Imperial Palace. "Soon, the NIRAA will triumph!," she said. Yoriko was in a celebratory mood, so she cranked up "Black Monk Time" again; she was playing "Complication." Gary Burger's savage guitar riffs lead into his angst-driven vocals: "Complication!/Complication!/Complication!/Constipation!/People cry (Complication!),/People die for you!/People kill (Complication!),/People will for you!/People run (Complication!),/Ain't it fun for you!/People go (Complication!)/To their deaths for you!/People cry (People cry!),/People die for you (People die for you!)!/People cry (People kill!),/People die for you (Yeah, they will for you!)!/People cry (People run!),/People die for you (Yeah, ain't it fun for you!)!/People cry (People go!),/People die for you (To their deaths for you!)!" Down below, Tokyo was not sharing Yoriko's jubilation. Against the wishes of his advisors, Emperor Akihito decided to tour the city. he remembered vividly when his father, the Showa Emperor, toured the bombed-out areas of Tokyo in World War II in a somewhat similar fashion; however, Hirohito was wearing his military uniform at that time. Akihito insisted on wearing a plaid shirt, leather jacket, casual slacks and a pair of work boots. He insisted on riding in a government motorpool vehicle instead of either his limousine or an SDF transport as the Cabinet suggested; the latter, he said, would have been too invocative of when his father rode on his white charger when reviewing the troops. He even resisted the suggestion of wearing a Ground SDF helmet; he wore a construction worker's helmet instead. He wanted to prove that he was suffering with the people. The vehicle chosen was rather plain; a dark blue Nissan Sentra that save for the kanakaji markings indicating that it was a "Government of Japan Motor Pool Vehicle" and the national flag and Imperial Standard on the front fenders, would have passed for any vehicle in rush hour. Just in case, an SDF troop transport followed at a discrete distance. Inside the SDF transport were the Sailor Senshi. The bureaucrat driving the Sentra saw a bombed-out elementary school, with National Police, SDF troops, EMS technicians and firefighters sifting through the rubble. "Stop here," Akihito said. The car screeched to a halt. Everyone clambered out of their vehicles. The SDF and Mobile Unit troops surrounded the area with the Sailor Senshi staying close to him. The destruction was horrific. The entire front facade was down, exposing the classrooms. The rescue crews didn't even pause to see who was approaching. However, the crew chief did notice. "Your Imperial Majesty," began the crew chief, "what brings you here?" "I want to help," was Akihito's reply. He approached the rubble and began to help clear it. The stench of death was hanging in the air, but there was the head of state of Japan, standing amidst all the chaos, helping to save lives. In earlier times, this would have been viewed as the act of a god saving his people, but now it was viewed as a mere human, but a compassionate one, not afraid to do his part in restoring order to his nation. Some of the older workers, mainly EMS personnel, who had some memories of times past, stopped and bowed at the sight of their Emperor at work. This was how one showed his concern for the welfare of his people, and not by riding a horse and seeing his armed forces in colorful display. Soon enough, a girl was found, barely alive. Her brown school sweater, brown skirt and white hat were torn to tatters. An EMS technician began to administer CPR on her. A few minutes later, however, she was dead. The EMS technician closed her eyes and faced away from her. He began to weep, the life drained from his exhausted face. Sailor Mars found a boy in the rubble. HE seemed to be miraculously all right. He was a bit dazed, though. "Mama?," he said to her as he rubbed his eyes. That one word caused Sailor Mars to shed a tear. At least he had parents waiting for him; she had no one now. She hugged him, letting the tears flow. The Emperor surveyed the destruction. The Prime Minister pulled up soon thereafter. "All of the city is like this, Your Imperial Majesty," he said. Everywhere, there were flames, smoke, rubble and carnage. "We have endured enough, and more than enough," was what Akihito finally said. Another car pulled up, and another bureaucrat appeared. "It would be best if you returned to the Imperial Palace, Your Imperial Majesty," he said. "There are some reports that you need to look at concerning the damage." "I will be there shortly," was the Emperor's reply. His mind was made up. Something had to be done about all this chaos. All were looking at him now for some sign, even if it was symbolic in nature. Anything to rally the people to help their beleaguered government. He got back to his car and the party made its way back to the Imperial Palace. Back at SDF HQ, Gen. Torymura received discouraging news. The government was considering surrendering to the NIRAA. Not only that, the American Congress and the American president were deadlocked about a joint resolution backing any UN efforts to send in troops to stop the attacks. Apparently the fears of another Vietnam, another Yugoslavia or another Somalia were hovering over them. Ryu went to Gen. Torymura and said, "If the government surrenders, the NIRAA will win. That must not come to pass." Gen. Torymura then asked, "What was that saying your friend Mamoru said, 'It's always darkest before the dawn?'" Ryu replied, "Yes, that's what he said." Gen. Torymura then said, "It's time to break the darkness. Go to the Imperial Palace and ask for the Emperor's opinion. If the people listen to him, all may yet not be lost." "Very well, Sir," said Ryu; he then left with Gov. Nagai and the Solar Warrior. Gen. Torymura was now alone. After he joined the SDF, he converted to Lutheranism. That wasn't a major handicap in Japan; Christianity was now as much tolerated as Buddhism was before it. Even Empress Michiko was herself a Catholic and had went to a Catholic university; she was the first non-Buddhist and non-Shintoist to marry into the Imperial Family. The Lutheran Church, Missouri Synod--which he belonged to--had made considerable inroads in Japan in recent years. He now knelt and bowed his head in prayer: "Almighty and merciful God the Father, our nation now stands at a critical crossroads in its history. There are those in this nation who wish to restore the tyranny that had brought untold suffering on countless millions just over half a century ago. If it be Your will, stop these people from their evil intentions and guide our nation to a new and better day. Give to those who the sword of the state is given to the power to quell unrest and trouble. Look with Your mercy over our troops, and if they fall in combat, take them into Your Kingdom as honored war dead. All this I ask of You, the Ruler of this Universe, in the name of Your Son Jesus Christ, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, who with You and the Holy Spirit reigns and lives now and forever, Amen." Gen. Torymura now left the battle to God. That was all he could do now. Data 14: Corlew's Last Stand The Lawndale Militia was beginning to move out of its bunker beneath the Lawndale Gun Club. Every soldier was equipped with serin grenades. Somehow, this new offensive seemed to carry with it the air of a suicide mission. As the last soldiers left the compound, Anthony Corlew turned around. He took out a remote control device and pressed the lone red button on it. The entire Lawndale Gun Club complex was blown up via hidden ordnance packs hidden in strategic points around the area. "If I fail in this, there won't be a trace of this facility left so they won't have any evidence against me.," Anthony said to himself. The Lawndale Militia was moving towards the downtown area, perhaps for the last time. Downtown Lawndale looked like a tornado had struck it. The Free Lawndalers just had to hang on for another hour until the National Guard arrived. Daria, Usagi, Ami and the others were at the ready. Upchuck, the geeky kid in school, went up to Daria. "After this is all over, you want to go to my foxhole and make love, not war? ROWR!," Upchuck said to Daria. "Upchuck, if you don't leave me alone this instant, I'll personally demonstrate on you what Lorena Bobbitt did to John Wayne Bobbitt!," Daria replied. Upchuck got the hint and got away from her. "This is it, everyone!," Mr. DeMartino said, "This is the battle that will either mean the end of the Lawndale Militia or the beginning of a dark age for this town! We've got to hold on until the National Guard arrives." Just then, there was a commotion at the edge of town. The Lawndale Militia was arriving! Anthony was at the front of the troops. They had gas masks on, and it looked like they were going to launch a terrifying attack. "On my signal, fire the sarin bombs!," Anthony said. The troops got ready to pull the pins on the grenades and throw them. There would be mere seconds to stop the attack before the deadly serin gas would be released. "Leave this up to me!," Usagi said. She spread her wings and began to fly. The Militiamen had now pulled the pins. The only thing that separated Death from Lawndale was the safety handles and a mere five seconds. They were ready to throw the grenades. "THROW AT WILL!," Anthony said. The grenades were being thrown at a rapid-fire pace. Suddenly, Usagi flew right above them, and waved her Moon Scepter around the general area. "MOON PRINCESS HALATION!," shouted Sailor Moon. The energy hit the grenades and turned them all into harmless dust, which then fell on the attackers. "GET THEM NOW WHILE WE'VE GOT THE ADVANTAGE!," Mr. DeMartino yelled. All the Free Lawndalers advanced on the bewildered Militia. The fighting was fierce. Casualties were heavy on both sides, but the superior numbers of the Free Lawndalers was beginning to tell. Soon, one of the Militiamen was yelling, "Everyone for himself, and the Devil take the hindmost!" Suddenly, Anthony saw his support dissipating. "Come back here and fight, or I'll shoot every last one of you!," Anthony said. But it was no use. He was all alone now. "Give yourself up," Daria said. "The National Guard will be here soon, and they're going to restore law and order here." "NEVER! I WILL NEVER SUBMIT TO JACK-BOOTED THUGS LIKE THEM!," Anthony roared and fled to St. Eligus' Presbyterian Church, which had a tall bell tower. Daria, Usagi, Ami, Jane, Trent and Jesse were in hot pursuit. Anthony got there first, and ran up the stairs, first jimmying the door so it wouldn't open. Daria got there soon after. "The door's been jimmied closed. I can't open it," she said. "Stand back!," Usagi said; she then shouted, "SAILOR MOON KICK!" The door was kicked into splinters. She and the others ran up the stairs to the top of the bell tower. Anthony was there, armed with an AK-47, some white phosphorus grenades and a Bowie knife. "STAND BACK! I'LL KILL YOU ALL IF YOU DON'T!," he yelled. Sailor Moon stood in front of everyone else and said: "You evil man! Trying to subvert the very nation and government you claim to be saving! I am the pretty soldier Eternal Sailor Moon, champion of love and justice! In place of the Moon, you're punished!" "You're not in Tokyo anymore, you Jap bitch!," Anthony said, and flung his Bowie knife right at Usagi. Daria tugged on a rope, causing a bell to ring and strike the knife out of harm's way. Daria now stared at him. "Why are you waging this war for?," she asked. Anthony replied, "To bring back constitutional government." Daria responded, "Then why do you want to establish a dictatorship that is the complete antithesis of everything that the Founding Fathers fought for in the Constitution? About sixty years ago, another group existed that blamed their nation's problems on minority groups and a so-called decadent government. They eventually got into power and killed many who opposed them. They were called the Nazis. Groups like yours keep saying that the letter of the Constitution must be obeyed, but you violate its spirit by trying to deny rights to minorities and others who disagree with you. Besides, if you really take over this country, what is to stop the same groups you persecute from forming their own terrorist organizations like the Black Panthers and the FALN? Groups like yours forget that violence only brings on more violence. Your vision of the Americana Dream is everyone else's nightmare, and I won't allow you to bring that to reality." "Then you are a traitor!," yelled Anthony. "No, you're the traitor, Mr. Corlew," Daria replied. Anthony screamed "DIE, TRAITOR!" and lunged for the Bowie knife. Daria got there as well and a fierce struggle began. They were rolling around the floor, getting perilously close first to the opening for the ropes, then to the edge of the tower. Punches were exchanged. Blood was spilled. Usagi and the others stood there helplessly. Daria knocked the knife out of Anthony's hand. Anthony then locked Daria in a chokehold and threw her up against the ledge. "You can't stop us all! There's too many like us all over the country!," Anthony bellowed. "Now I'm going to snap your neck!" Everyone knew they had to do something now. Trent saw the Bowie knife there on the floor and picked it up. "I WON'T LET YOU MURDER THE WOMAN I LOVE!," Trent yelled Anthony turned around to see Trent throw the knife right into his heart. Anthony stood there for a second, then drew the knife out. "I'll take you with me, you welfare-cheating hippie!," he managed to spurt out. He was ready to fling the knife back at Trent. Usagi, however, ran up to him. "SAILOR MOON KICK!," she yelled and kicked him real hard. The force of the kick threw Anthony clear of the ledge and out of the tower. Anthony yelled "AAAAAAAAAA!" as he plunged the one hundred feet to the ground. The body made a great "SPLAT!" upon impact, then was ran over by a Humvee troop transport, an M1A1 Abrams tank, and a National Guard unit singing Fleetwood Mac's "Tusk": "Why don't you ask him/If he's going to stay?/Why don't you ask him/If he's going away?/Why don't you tell me/What's going on?/Why don't you tell me/Who's on the phone?/Why don't you ask him/What's going on?/Why don't you ask him/The latest on his throne?/Don't say that you love me!/Just say that you want me!/Don't say that you love me!/Just say that you want me!/Tusk!/Tusk!/Tusk!" Jesse saw the whole thing and then said, "Trent, this is bumming me out, man!" Trent replied, "I know, man, but it had to be done." Jesse added, "My Uncle Phil went the same way." Daria could now see that the National Guard had arrived. "This is the National Guard! You are to surrender immediately! You are completely surrounded!," a voice said on a bullhorn. Daria went to Trent and said, "Thanks for saving my life." "I'll never let anyone hurt you, Daria," Trent said as he embraced her. They French kissed. Some National Guard soldiers clambered up the tower. One of them asked, "Is everyone all right?" "Yes, everything's fine now," Jane said. She had this satisfied smile on her face as she saw her brother and Daria continue to kiss. She wasn't going to forget this moment anytime soon. Sometime later, the National Guard was beginning to restore order. Trucks full of captured Lawndale Militia soldiers were being routed out of town to Powell Armory, where the unit was stationed. The mayor, along with the commanding officer of the unit, approached Daria and the others as they came down from the bell tower. "This town--in fact, the whole nation--owes you an immeasurable debt of gratitude, young lady," the commander, who was Col. Thomas Wood, said to Daria. "No need to thank just me, Colonel," Daria said, "this was a team effort." She threw her arms around Usagi and Ami, then motioned to the rest of her friends. "Ms. Morgendorffer," the mayor said, "words can't even begin to express our thanks to you and the others who freed our town from this menace." Mr. DeMartino now approached with Ms. Li. Somehow, the usually pushy Ms. Li was rather downtrodden. "Ms. Li," Mr. DeMartino said, "I think you owe the good citizens of this city an explanation for the callous disregard for the public's safety and the shameless huckstering of corporate sponsorship and waste of taxpayers' money you made with your silly football game." "Ms. Li," the mayor said, "I intend to have the Board of Education audit your school's entire finances. I think you have some major explanations to make to myself, the City Council and the State Education Department for all this." "When I'm eventually vindicated," Ms. Li said, "You're going to pay, DeMartino!" "I seriously doubt that!," Mr. DeMartino said, his right eye bulging out again. "I've got some very convincing evidence here that will prove my case.. Once they're done with you, you'll never become school superintendent here or anywhere else." Ms. Li just slunk away. "As much as we'd like to stand here and collect all this praise," Daria said, "we've still got some outstanding business to deal with in Tokyo, right, everyone?" "You said it, Daria," Sailor Moon said. Daria then added, "But, before that, there's just one little detail I want to take care of." Sailor Moon asked, "What's that?" Daria replied, "Change my costume from this stupid seirafuku to one of those armored bikinis I keep seeing in your anime back in Japan." Sailor Moon was aghast in shock; she then said, "Are you kidding me?" "Hey, you just saved my life; it's the least you could do," shot back Daria. "OK, OK," Usagi said. She took the Moon Scepter and waved it in front of Daria. "MOON TRANSFORMATION MAGIC!," she yelled. Daria was transformed again, and this time she was wearing a blue armored bikini with blue knee-length boots. On her left breast was the symbol for Mercury. "Now you're talking," Daria said. "OK, who's with us?," Sailor Moon wanted to know. Jane, Trent and Jesse raised their hands. "Count us in, too!," a voice said nearby. It was Mack and Jodie. "Mack, Jodie, you want to join us as well?," said Daria. Mack replied, "Hey, I want to help; besides, I want to know if my cousin is OK." "He is, I assure you," Daria said. "But you're more than welcome to join us anyway." "OK, as they say in railroading, 'ALL ABOARD!'", Usagi said. "Everyone gather around me." They did so. Sailor Moon help up the Moon Scepter and said, "MOON TELEPORTATION ACTIVATION!" They were gone in a flash. "Godspeed, Daria Morgendorffer, godspeed," the mayor said. Back at Tokyo, Yoriko was so close to the Imperial Palace she could almost sense the impending victory. She was looking forward to this for a long time. "Soon, Father, you will be vindicated!," she yelled. Unless a miracle happened, Japan would once again be in the iron grip of tyranny. Data 15: Sailor Misery Chick Takes to the Skies Gen. Torymura and Mamoru were both pacing the floor. The waiting was the hardest part in any battle. One did not know until the troops came back as to who survived and who was injured or dead. "They've got to be OK!," Mamoru finally said. Suddenly, there was a blinding flash of light. Usagi, Daria, Ami, Jane, Trent, Jesse, Mack and Jodie had finished their teleportation. Mamoru couldn't hold back his feelings. "Usako, you're back!," Mamoru said as he ran to her and kissed her. "I was worried." He then took a look at Daria. "Daria, what's with the bikini?" "Long story, Mamoru," Daria said. Mamoru noticed that Ami was with them. "Ami, you're alive! What happened?" "As Daria just said, it's a long story," Ami said. Daria then turned to her friends and said, "Guys, I want you to meet my friends." She began with Jane and went from left to right. "This is Jane Lane; that's her brother Trent; the guy next to him is Jesse Moreno; the black guy is Michael Jordan Mackenzie; we just call him 'Mack'; and the black women with him is Jodie Landon. Everyone, this is Gen. Torymura Keiichi of the Japan Air Self Defense Force, along with Chiba Mamoru, a/k/a Tuxedo Mask." Tuxedo Mask extended his hand to Trent and said, "Welcome to Japan. I wish it was under better circumstances." "Hey, man, it was one strange trip," Trent replied. "So, how are things here?," Sailor Moon asked. "Not good," Tuxedo Mask said. "Tokyo has virtually been bombed to rubble. Even now Yoriko and the Neo-Zero are heading for the Imperial Palace. We've got to stop her." Ryu, Gov. Nagai and the Solar Warrior returned. "You'd better turn on the TV and tune in to NHK," Ryu said. "The Emperor is giving a speech." The TV was turned on. There on NHK was the entire Imperial Family: Emperor Akihito, Empress Michiko, Crown Prince Naruhito and his wife, Crown Princess Masako, and all the other immediate members, as well as the Prime Minister and members of the Cabinet. In the background was the Imperial Standard, which had the Imperial Mon, or crest, of a yellow sixteen-pedaled chrysanthemum on a red field, along with the Prime Minister's flag of five white chrysanthemums in a pentagon arrangement on a yellow field and the familiar national flag of a red disk on a white filed. The Emperor stood up. "Citizens of Japan," the Heisei Emperor began, "we stand at a perilous crossroads in our nation's long history. There are forces here in this nation who are trying to destroy over half a century of peaceful, democratic progress. We must not succumb to those who would ruin all the progress that has been made in these past five decades. We have always been a resilient people. When the West visited us nearly a century and a half ago, we realized that we had to adapt and modernize. After the tragic events of the 1920's through the 1940's--where ruthless military leaders led our nation to disaster--we resolved to rebuild, even taking some help from those had been victorious against us. Some would question that assistance, but in the long run, it has been for the better. Are we to go back to the chaos of that terrible time, or are we to embrace the dawn of the new millennium by fighting back against these extremist elements? Therefore, it is the duty of every citizen of this nation to fight back against those who would bring chaos to our nation. We must fight to protect one of the strongest democratic regimes ever known. We must defend our way of life and our peaceful economy. We must stand up and fight back, even if we must resort of sharpened bamboo stick to fend off the enemy and fall to the last man. Now what is at stake here is not territorial expansion or defeating foreign troops; it is the very survival of our nation that is at stake. Go out and fight for what is right, and may all the kami and megami who watch over our nation defend us." "The Emperor did the right thing, just like his father before him," Gen. Torymura said. "The people are now on his--and our--side," the Solar Warrior said. "Now if we could only hear if we'll get any outside help," Usagi said. Yoriko heard the entire speech on a portable radio. She was not pleased. "The Emperor has betrayed us!," Yoriko said. "He will pay!" Dr. Vander Helffen had heard the entire speech himself and decided that action had to be taken. "Yoriko has now become too much of a liability to successfully carry out her mission," he said to some ninja soldiers. "She will now blindly try to fulfill a blood lust. Get my Iron Cross robotic armor and suit me up. I will go to the Imperial Palace myself and take care of matters." Back at SDF HQ, a private arrived with a message for Gen. Torymura. "I'm afraid it's not good," the private said. "The Americans will not be sending any help, nor anyone else for that matter. The American bases have been far too damaged, and popular opinion is against them interfering in what they feel is an internal affair. The Russians, Chinese, British, French and others have expressed similar problems, as well as limited resources and budgetary concerns." "It looks like we stand alone, then," Gen. Torymura said. "It's time to fall back on my back-up plan. Take Ms. Morgendorffer and her friends to Mr. Hamada's place in Narita." The private saluted and motioned to the others. "We have to go someplace. We have an ace in the hole," was all the private said. It was a considerable drive given the bombed-out conditions of the roads in Tokyo. They weren't that much better once they entered Chiba-ken. Once they got to Narita, though, they were much improved. Finally, the SDF Humvee reached the residence of the Hamadas. They stepped out of the Humvee and went to the front door. The private rang the doorbell. Ieyasu answered. "I have been expecting you," he said. "Come in." They entered the house. It was like most houses in post-war Japan, of somewhat Western style but with some of the touches of traditional Japanese living. As customary, everyone's shoes were removed. Daria could see that for all the modern day conveniences, the house still had tatami mats on the floor; so important were these mats in traditional Japanese architecture that rooms were often measured in how many of these mats could fit in them. Here in the living room--which was one of two rooms done in the traditional Japanese style--stood the tokonoma, or alcove for art; off to the side was the family shrine. There was the TV and the radio, along with a computer and a short-wave CB. "Pretty impressive place you have here, sir," Daria finally said. "I am Hamada Ieyasu, but almost everyone here calls me by my nickname I had when I once was working for Toyota's American operations, 'Harry'. As you can tell, I don't let old age slow me down. You see, I just happen to be a special operative for the SDF." "Huh?," Usagi said in surprise. "You see, I do have a lot of expertise in these matters. When the militarists took over our nation, I was contacted by a group of concerned Japanese-Americans who were worried about our nation being involved with the Axis powers. I played the role of the good soldier, volunteering to be with the old JIAAF, while at the same time giving information about upcoming attacks on American positions. Even after the unfortunate relocation of the Japanese-American population, the American government thought I would be of service to them. I was even entrusted with special messages that were sent to me by the famed Navaho Code Talkers, which you know out government was unable to decipher. I admit that I did some things I was not proud of for both sides, but I was never suspected. When I had the opportunity to capture American POW's, I let them escape after briefing them about my activities; if I was captured by the Americans, I always told the top brass about my covert activities on the behalf of their government. I was one of the first persons to warn the new Truman Administration that the government was willing to sacrifice everyone to save their nation. It was perhaps one of the reasons why the atomic bombs fell on Hiroshima and Nagasaki." "And you have no remorse over that?," Daria said. Ieyasu continued, "I'll admit that I do feel remorse that many died in those two attacks. But it is known that some American POW's died as well. But as I see it, atrocities were made by everyone in the war, so it's a wash. What matters is the here and now. Anyway, after the war, I did my part in reconstructing the nation; I assisted the occupation forces in various matters, and after they left, I was contacted by my government about forming a special unit that would keep an eye on groups that would try to bring back militarism. The unit was named 'Red Unit'. We're a special part of the SDF--which for obvious reasons officially doesn't exist--that keeps an eye on groups like the NIRAA in case something like the present situation occurs. I keep tabs on these groups via short-wave radio and the Internet, as well as take considerable risks in infiltrating their secret meetings. Believe me, I am seen as a hero by my neighbors; to them, I am not a traitor for what I did during the war, or even now. There is no honor lost if you admit that you did wrong and wish to do penance. We'd much prefer what we have now than to go back to those dark days of the past." Everyone stood there, silently amazed at what Ieyasu had told them. He finally broke the silence: "Come, I know why you are here. The plane is waiting for us in the back." "Plane?," Usagi said. They stepped out and saw the Nick there in the backyard. "Any of you into airplanes?," Ieyasu said. "I am," Daria said. "That's a Kawasaki Ki-45 Toryu night fighter/ground attack aircraft. Maximum speed, 338 MPH; powerplant, two Mitsubishi Ha-102 14-cylinder radial piston engines rated at 1079 horsepower; range of 1240 miles; service ceiling of 33,000 feet; armed with a forward-firing 37-mm cannon, two obliquely mounted upward-firing 20-mm cannons and a 7.92-mm machine gun in the rear observer's position. The 'Nick,' as we called it, was unusual for a Japanese aircraft since it had armored gas tanks, whereas most other planes like the Zero didn't. And it was this plane, and not the Zero, that made the first Kamikaze attacks against American naval vessels in 1944." "I see you know this plane very well," Ieyasu said. "Right now, this old plans is the only airworthy craft we have against the Neo-Zero." "Wouldn't that be like using a pea shooter against an ICBM?," Daria said. "I have studied much of your Western world's religions," Ieyasu continued, "and if I recall, in both Judaism and Christianity, they didn't give a young man not much older than you named David much of a chance against someone named Goliath, who was a bit taller than most of your nation's basketball players. Remember, back in 1281, no one thought we stood a chance against the mighty Mongol Empire when they sent a vast armada against us. But then our Shinto priest prayed for divine intervention, and a massive storm sank much of the Mongol fleet. That was the origin of Kamikaze, the 'Divine Wind.' Only much later on was it given to those soldiers and pilots who sacrificed themselves in fighting against the enemy during World War II." "For what it's worth," Daria said, "no one thought the English had a chance against the Spanish Armada back in 1588, either, and they were totaled by bad weather as well." Ieyasu got a good laugh over that. "Young lady, you are not like most other Americans I have met; you're not so uptight. Now, I guess I'll take you and you." He pointed to Daria and Ami. "Let's get in the plane and take off. My wife has already let down the fence so we'll taxi onto the street and take off from there." Natsume, Ieyasu's wife went to Jane and said, "You can join me in the car and follow them." "Fine by me," Jane said. "I'll fly on my own and see if I can't help in anyway," Usagi said. Thus Ieyasu, Daria and Ami got into the Nick. Ieyasu got to the pilot's controls and turned on the ignition. Ami sat next to him while Daria got in the rear observer's position. The engines coughed to life as the propellers began spinning. Soon the lumbering plane was going down the backyard, to the front and out onto the street, where it got into take-off position. Ieyasu made a careful check of all systems. "All systems go," he said. He then pulled gently on the throttle and the plane eased down the road, and was soon airborne. Jane and Natsume followed in Ieyasu's car, and Sailor Moon took off and flew in the same direction. The final battle to save Japan from the NIRAA was soon underway. Yoriko was flying over what was left of Tokyo. She had "Black Monk Time" in the CD player again. This time she was listening to "I Hate You" Larry Clark's screeching organ playing led into Gary Burger's vocals: "Hey, well, I hate you with a passion, baby! Yeah, I do!/But call me!/Well, you know, my hate's everlasting, baby!/But call me!/Do you, do you, do you, do you, do you, do you, do you, do you know why I hate you, baby? Huh? Do you now?/But call me!/Wellllllllllll, it's because, because, because you make me hate you, baby! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!/But call me!" Suddenly, she saw the Nick and Sailor Moon flying right toward her. "Hah! All they can send against me is a rusty old World War II relic? It's no contest!," she sneered. Yoriko had the Nick targeted in her HUD. She was ready to fire away with the Deathgrip cannon when suddenly, Sailor Moon parked right on top of her; all Yoriko could see was Sailor Moon's buttocks. "GET OFF OF ME!," Yoriko yelled. Yoriko instinctively pulled back and got into a steep climb. Sailor Moon was thrown off, but it gave the Nick a momentary edge. Ieyasu fired the forward cannon, sending a hail of bullets Yoriko's way. "DAMMIT!," Yoriko screeched. The bullets cut right through the Neo-Zero, though it was pretty heavily armored; thus it only got slight damage. Yoriko decided to arm Neo-Sidewinders. Ieyasu saw that coming. "If she fires those missiles, we're done for!," Ami said. "See those infrared flares back there?," Ieyasu said. Ami said she did. "Light some, and then throw them overboard on my mark," Ieyasu said. Ami did as Ieyasu said to her. She lit the flares. Luckily these were somewhat similar to roadside flares and could be held for some time. Yoriko aimed the HUD again at the Nick. "SEE YOU IN HELL, BASTARDS!," she yelled as she fired every available missile she had. Ieyasu saw it coming. "NOW!," he yelled. Ami dumped the flares overboard, and the missiles went right for them, blowing up harmlessly, though it was a bit too close for comfort for everyone aboard. They were jolted a bit. "YAHOO!, and I don't mean that Internet search engine, either!," Ieyasu said. "WHAT IN HELL!," Yoriko said. Sailor Moon saw all this going on and said, "Holy moley!" Now the Nick had the edge. Ieyasu sent the forward gun blazing. The bullets ripped through the Neo-Zero like lightning. The Neo-Zero fired back, doing some damage of its own. Daria was lovingly holding to the trigger of her tailgun. The wind was whipping her hair as she stood in her position. Somehow, wearing her new armored bikini outfit and with her wind-tossed hair, she felt very sexy; perhaps the sexiest she ever felt in all her life. The Neo-Zero made another pass at the Nick, firing away like crazy. Two bullets whizzed just short of Daria, who fired back. "God, I love an old-fashioned dogfight!," Ieyasu said. He was now remembering those days when he flew this old plane up against the Americans, but now this was different; he had American allies, and they were fighting for a free, democratic Japan. How much times had changed since 1945! If only most of his comrades were alive now, he could tell them about this. "We were wrong for opposing the Americans; by all rights, we should have called them our allies against the Nazis and the Fascists," was what he wished to say to them. "We were foolish to back their cause. We should have made some type of economic association with our neighbors more like the European Union and not the imperial expansion we sought. Didn't we decide to adopt Western technology and Western ways so we could stand as equals with them instead of being subservient? We must lead by example to show the rest of the world the way to a better day." But he was not so much worried for the past as for the future. No matter what that future was--a new Ice Age leading to Crystal Tokyo, or a high-tech future like many wished, or even the status quo--he was fighting for a future where freedom and democracy ruled, not a return to reactionary rule. He was fighting for his future; he was fighting for Usagi's and Ami's; in a sense, he was also fighting for Daria's as well. He knew that even his own father opposed the militarists, but was silenced by them. If only he was alive to see this. The fusillades were fast and furious now. Both planes suffered considerable damage. Somehow the superior speed and firepower of the Neo-Zero was beginning to tell. But now it was time to play the end game of this battle. Ieyasu piloted the Nick so that it was now right below the Neo-Zero. "Ami, Daria, aim for the drop tanks," Ieyasu said. Ami aimed the obliquely-mounted, upward-firing guns at the top of the plane at the left tank while Daria aimed her tailgun (which was on a flexible mount) on the right tank. "On my mark, fire!," Ieyasu said. They got very close to the Neo-Zero now. Yoriko managed to pick them up on her radar. "They think they can knock me out with a surprise attack?," she sneered. "I'll show them!" Ieyasu sensed that he was at the right position. "NOW!," he yelled. All the guns were blazing at the drop tanks. Yoriko was ready to fire the afterburners and launch a surprise attack of her own. However, one of the bullets (which was especially reinforced and hardened to pierce the armored tanks) managed to go right through the right tank. When the afterburners were kicked in, it ignited. Yoriko saw it ignite in horror. "NO! IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!," she screamed. She knew she only had seconds in which to act. She pressed the eject button and was thrown out of the Neo-Zero. It went on its own for a few seconds before the right drop tank finally exploded; soon the entire jet fighter was enveloped in flames, dropping to Tokyo Bay; when it landed into the water, it exploded with a loud "BOOM!" Yoriko was now floating down toward Tokyo. Sailor Moon saw what happened. She got onto a radio she was carrying and said, "You guys did it!" She could hear the sounds of celebration in the Nick. In the Nick, which was still airworthy despite all the damage inflicted on it, Ieyasu turned to his comrades and said, "Well done, ladies." "The Neo-Zero may be destroyed, Harry, but we still have Yoriko to deal with," Daria said. All agreed with her on that. They were making their way back to Narita when Jane radioed in from Natsume's car. "We saw everything, guys! Way to go!" "Better not open the champagne yet, Jane, " Daria said, "as Yogi Berra says, 'It ain't over 'til it's over.'" Data 16: Tokyo Game, Set, and Match Dr. Vander Helffen, now clad in his Iron Cross robotic armor, was heading down the deserted streets of Tokyo on his way to the Imperial Palace. He was not aware that the Neo-Zero had been shot down. He was planning to deal with Yoriko eventually, she had gotten too big for her britches. But he also knew that he had to take his next 'Hi no Tori' immortality pill soon, or suffer grave consequences. He was nearing the street he needed to go down to in order to get to the Imperial Palace. However, Ryu was blocking his way. "Dr. Vander Helffen! I won't let you get away with this!," Ryu said. "The Japan you want to bring back has long been discredited!" "Get out of my way, traitor!," Dr. Vander Helffen said. He picked up a Mazda and flung it right at him. Ryu got out of the way in time, but then was bushwhacked by a sucker punch that sent him through a wall. Ryu slowly got up. On his bare forearms were the dragon and tiger tattoos that were given to him after he was admitted as a Shaolin priest. A wise man named Kwai Chang Caine, who he met in his travels abroad, once said that strength and might was not all there was at battle; intelligence was as important. Use your foe's strengths against him. Ryu went to Dr. Vander Helffen and launched into a roundhouse kick. Dr. Vander Helffen swung a fist at him, but instead knocked down a facade, sending bricks raining down on him. However, Dr. Vander Helffen shook that off and approached Ryu. Suddenly, there was a searing blast of solar energy from nowhere. "SOLAR FLARE DISCHARGE ATTACK!," yelled a voice. The solar energy knocked Dr. Vander Helffen down. Tetsuo stepped out of some rubble. "You evil man!," he said, "I am the Solar Warrior, servant to Amaterasu-Omikami, Goddess of the Sun and defender of Japan! In the name of the Sun you are judged!" Dr. Vander Helffen yelled in anger, "I WILL KILL YOU ALL!" He charged at them. Ryu and the Solar Warrior now launched a double-barreled assault. They pounded him hard, real hard. The Iron Cross armor was beginning to buckle, then finally, it fell apart and exploded, ejecting Dr. Vander Helffen out of it. He was severely injured. Ryu and the Solar Warrior approached him. "Give yourself up!," the Solar Warrior said. "Never!," Dr. Vander Helffen said. "Once I take this last 'Hi no Tori' immortality pill, I will be as strong as ever. He took it out of his vial and was about to put it in his mouth, but in his haste to swallow it, it missed his mouth, rolled across the street and rolled into the sewer. Dr. Vander Helffen screamed in agony: "NOOOOOOOOOO! IT WAS THE LAST ONE! NOOOOOOOO! NOOOOOOOOOOO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Suddenly, a hideous transformation took place. Dr. Vander Helffen was aging rapidly before Ryu and the Solar Warrior. His hair turned gray and fell out. His skin wrinkled up. His bones sagged in arthritic pain. All this rapid aging proved to be too much, and Dr. Vander Helffen fell down dead from a heart attack. But this was not the end of that. Suddenly, the body began to rapidly decompose. The skin rotted away to nothing, then the muscles, intestines and sinews as well. Then the skeleton rapidly turned to dust, and was blown away in all directions by the wind. Thus was the horrible end of Dr. Helmut Vander Helffen, former genetic expert to Hitler, shadowy leader of the New Imperial Rule Assistance Association. Ryu and the Solar Warrior saw the whole thing. "Now he's gone to Yomi, the land of the dead, where he belongs!," the Solar Warrior said. "Now we have but one more enemy to face: Amazana Yoriko," Ryu said. Ryu got out his portable communicator to contact the Sailor Senshi. It was time to find Yoriko. "Sailor Senshi, can you hear me?," he said. "I hear you," Daria said. Ryu then asked, "Where is Amazana Yoriko?" "I think she parachuted her way to the Mitsubishi Building," Daria replied. "We'll met you there," Ryu said. He and the Solar Warrior headed off in that direction. Yoriko had landed on the roof of the Mitsubishi Building. For now, she was alone. "I will never surrender!," she said to herself. She took a look at the streets below. The NIRAA soldiers were engaged in fierce fighting with the SDF now. It seemed that everyone had taken the Emperor's message to heart and were now fighting to rid Japan of the NIRAA. "Those fools," she said, "if they think they can defeat us, they are crazy!" Suddenly, the door of the stairway leading to the roof was kicked open, and Sailor Moon, along with the other Sailor Senshi, Tuxedo Mask, Jane, Trent, Jesse, Mack, his cousin Brian, Jodie, Ryu and the Solar Warrior entered. "Amazana Yoriko, give yourself up!," said Sailor Moon; "I am the pretty soldier Eternal Sailor Moon, champion of love and justice! These are the Sailor Senshi and our allies! In the name of the Moon and in the name of a free and democratic Japan, we will punish you!" "You're already too late!," Yoriko yelled. "We've bombed most of Tokyo to rubble, and even now the civilian government's thinking of surrendering! At long last, my father, Gen. Tojo Hideki, will be vindicated!" "As long as my master, Amaterasu-Omikami, Goddess of the Sun, shines above in the heavens, I swear you will never succeed in your evil plans!," the Solar Warrior said. "Once the NIRAA has seized power, you will all be destroyed!," Yoriko said. Daria wanted to cut to the heart of the matter. "Why is it," Daria said, "that your organization wants to bring back the form of tyranny that brought so much suffering to millions of innocent people?" "Do not question me!," Yoriko said. "We want to make Japan the leader of the world!" "May I remind you that the military government that ruled during World War II was responsible for such things as the attack on Manchuria, the Rape of Nanjing, the attack on Pearl Harbor, the Baatan Death March, the POW camps, the Korean comfort woman, and other atrocities?," Daria said. "Certainly you're planning to do all that and worse!" "I WILL SILENCE YOU ONCE AND FOR ALL TIME, YOU MINX!," Yoriko said. She took the vial of the only "Hi no Tori" immortality pills left in the world and swallowed them all. She screamed as a hideous transformation took place. She grew to be fifty feet tall, and now had horns on her head, green hair and was wearing a tiger skin suit. She now had sharp teeth and sharp claws. She had transformed into a gigantic oni, or ogre. "Oooooo, you've really made her mad now, Daria," Jane said. "Tell me about it," Daria replied. "FALL BACK!," Sailor Moon said to everyone. Yoriko now seized Daria and threw her on the roof again. She then stepped on her with her left cloven foot. "Now I will crush you like Japan will do to all who oppose her!," Yoriko said. "Then I will kill you all!" "We've got to save Daria!," Sailor Moon said. Now every Sailor Senshi unleashed her attack, some of them were old, some of them new: "MOON PRINCESS HALATION!" Tuxedo Mask lunged his extended walking cane at the creature as well. Ryu launched into a roundhouse kick. The Solar Warrior then launched into his "SOLAR FLARE DISCHARGE ATTACK!" But it all seemed to be in vain; Yoriko still was standing. Now she stepped harder on Daria. "Mon, Dad, Quinn, I now realize you'll never hear me say this, but I've always loved you!," Daria said to herself. Suddenly, there was a dazzling flash of light that blinded everyone. There was a loud voice that pierced the air: "I am Amaterasu-Omikami, Goddess of the Sun and Protector of Japan! I have heard the pleas of my people to deliver them from their peril and I will save them, for the battle and the victory are mine! Amazana Yoriko, in the name of the Sun and of my people that I care for deeply, you are judged!" Amaterasu-Omikami now appeared, brandishing the legendary sword Murakumo-no-Tsurugi, which belonged to her brother Susano, the God of the Wind. She unsheathed the sword and swung it at Yoriko. Yoriko parried the blow with her left arm, then tried to wrest the sword from Amaterasu-Omikami. Suddenly, Susano himself appeared and blew cold wind into Yoriko's face, sending her howling. Brandishing the spear that Izanagi and Izanami used to create Japan, he plunged it into Yoriko's belly, sending her howling. She got off Daria, who stood up again. Yoriko withdrew the spear and flung it at Susano, who grabbed it. Amaterasu-Omikami now charged at Yoriko with Murakumo-no-Tsurugi, and drove it home right into Yoriko's heart. The creature was not dead, but now was weakened and in bitterest agony. "My child," Amaterasu-Omikami said to Rei, "Use the powers of the miko that are yours by birthright to banish the demon." Rei took a demon banishment scroll and said, "This is for you, Grandpa! Akuryo taisan!," and flung it at the creature, sticking to its forehead. "Ami, Daria, freeze her!," Sailor Moon said. They both said "SHABON SPRAY, FREEZING!," and froze Yoriko solid. "Now, Sailor Moon," Amaterasu-Omikami said, "finish her off! Destroy this demon and end this war!" Sailor Moon took out her Moon Scepter and pointed it at the creature. "MOON PRINCESS HALATION!" The magic beams hit the creature with such force that it exploded with a loud "BOOM!" Everyone was knocked off their feet by the violent explosion. Daria, however was blown over and nearly fell to the street save for her grabbing a railing. Daria was hanging on for dear life. Suddenly, an arm grabbed her, and Daria grabbed it with both hands and was taken to safety. It turned out to be Jane. "Thanks, Jane," Daria said, "I owe you one!" "Now to end this battle once and for all!," Amaterasu-Omikami said. Suddenly, fiery shafts shot out of her fingers, and they traveled all around Tokyo, incinerating every last NIRAA ninja soldier. Suddenly, it was all over. Amazana Yoriko and the NIRAA were obliterated. The dark clouds that were hanging over Tokyo began to dissipate as the Sun began to shine through. "Thus as the sunshine dissipates the storm clouds, a new era dawns for Japan," Amaterasu-Omikami said. "Amazana Yoriko and the NIRAA have been destroyed. Peace reigns again. I want to congratulate all of you for helping me stop these deadly adversaries. As a token of my favor, receive these." Once again, fiery shafts emerged form her fingers, but this time they solidified into gemstones. "These solar gemstones will serve as a reminder of your heroic deeds in saving my people," Amaterasu-Omikami said. "Keep them with pride, and pass them on to your children and grandchildren. Remind them of the time you saved my people from tyranny. And now I must leave you. Come, my brother, we will return to the heavens. I will leave you with my blessing: may you live long and healthy lives for as long as the Sun shall shine in the skies." Thus the two gods left our plane of existence for theirs. Everyone stood there speechless for a minute. Finally, Sailor Moon said, "We did it. We all did it. We saved Japan." They could hear the SDF soldiers below singing "Kimigayo" again, followed by a chorus of "BANZAI! BANZAI! BANZAI!" A new era had dawned on Japan, and the world was never going to be the same. A few days later, a huge crowd had gathered in the Throne Room of the Imperial Palace. There were ambassadors, members of the Diet, and SDF soldiers, sailors and airmen as well as the Prime Minister, the Cabinet and the Imperial Family. Also there was Representative-Elect Nagai; despite the horrible damage Tokyo suffered, the by-election went on as scheduled, and he won by a landslide. The Sailor Senshi, Ryu, the Solar Warrior, Gen. Torymura and Jane were all going to receive the Order of the Rising Sun, the highest medal Japan could bestow. They all entered the room, and everyone smartly stepped aside to allow them passage. They walked up to the Emperor and stopped in front of him, bowing deeply. "Honored heroes," the Emperor began, "today a grateful Japan gives to you the highest award this nation can bestow for bravery above and beyond the call of duty: the Order of the Rising Sun. Wear these medals with pride. Remember the sacrifices you made to save our nation from peril." The Emperor them pinned the medals on each of them. After that, the crowd cheered "BANZAI!" five times. Gen. Torymura then stepped forward to say a few words: "I want to commend the brave actions made by all those who were under my command in this situation. We were fighting against impossible odds but we succeeded. But I do not know if I am worthy of such high merit. I must confess a shortcoming to you that occurred fifteen years ago. I was on patrol that day when the Soviets shot down the KAL jet that wandered into their airspace. We should have done something to avert the tragedy, but we felt bound by Article 9. Although we had been cleared of negligence, I still feel some moral responsibility for what happened because my sister and brother-in-law were on board. But now I can begin to atone for my shortcomings." He motioned to Makoto and continued, "I hereby vow to you all that I will take care of my niece Kino Makoto, whose parents were on board that plane, and I will finance her college education. She will live with my wife and children as well as myself. She will once again have a family." The crowd applauded. Tears of joy were running down Makoto's face. Daria clapped with the others; meanwhile, she knew that she had to catch a flight after this, and there was one small matter she had to take care of at a duty free shop before that. . . At Narita Airport, Daria, Jane, Trent, Jesse, Jodie and Mack were going to take the next flight to Lawndale. But there was some matters to take care of first. "Well," Ami said, "since I didn't register, I lost my tuition deposit. Now I'll have to wait another year for pre-med. Besides, I don't think I'm ready for it yet, anyway." "Good call, Ami-chan," Usagi said, "we need you big time." "I guess this means my career as Sailor Mercury is over," Daria said. "It most certainly is!," Luna said. "Ami, Daria, grab onto my tail." They did, and the Sailor Mercury powers were transferred back to Ami. "Well," Daria said, "back to just being a mere mortal!" "Hey," Jane said, "you still have your ability to put down people!" "Daria," Usagi said, "on behalf of all the Sailor Senshi, thanks for all your help. If we ever get a chance to visit Lawndale, we'll look you up. Keep in touch with us, OK?" "We will," Daria said. "Mikey," Brian said, "it was nice meeting you again, even if it was brief." "Next time you go on leave, drop by," Mack said. "I'm going to miss you guys," Daria said, then hugged all the Sailor Senshi. The PA announcer said that the Lawndale flight was now boarding. "We've got to go now," Daria said. "Keep the faith!" Daria and her friends then went down the gate. "Farewell, Daria Morgendorffer, and godspeed!," Usagi said. The Sailor Senshi returned to Tokyo. It was now midnight. Most of the Sailor Senshi were with their parents in the emergency shelters that were set up around the area. Usagi's parents hadn't returned from the resort yet, so she and Chibi-Usa were staying with Luna and Rei in Mamoru's apartment. Usagi and Mamoru were sleeping together. Usagi got up, put on a robe, walked across the apartment past the couches where Luna, Rei and Chibi-Usa were sleeping and stepped onto the balcony. She could see the horrific damage that Tokyo suffered. Mamoru then joined her. "Mamo-chan," Usagi said, "with all the horrible things that have just happened here, and with all the evil that is still rampant in this world, will we ever realize Crystal Tokyo?" "Perhaps it won't come to pass exactly the way everyone thought it would," Mamoru said, "but it is still possible. Maybe it is up to us to make it happen. Tokyo will be rebuilt, and it will be people like us who will rebuild it. It will take people like Gov. Nagai to realize that vision, that future we're all fighting for. Besides, I think I can make a difference here and now. Tomorrow I'm going to announce that I want to seek the Komeito nomination for the governorship of Tokyo-to. And I wouldn't mind if you were my First Lady." Usagi asked, "Mamo-chan, are you asking me to marry you?" Mamoru replied, "Yes, Usako." "Then," answered Usagi, "in that case, of course." Mamoru then pointed outside and said, "Tsukino Usagi, take a look around you. From the ashes we will build a better future for all of us. If that isn't worth fighting for, than what is. At least if we are to fight for it, let us do that side-by-side, husband and wife." They then kissed and returned to bed. They made love, and they fell asleep, Mamoru's head laying across Usagi's breasts. Usagi then said to herself, "We will fight for a better future, Queen Serenity, and we will do it together." At Lawndale International Airport, Helen, Jake and Quinn were waiting for Daria's flight to arrive. "When are they going to get here?," Jake said. "You know airlines," Helen said, "they're always running behind schedule!" Suddenly, Daria and her friends came down the gate. They ran up to Daria and hugged her. "Welcome home, sweetheart!," Jake said. "We're so happy you're back." "Quinn," Daria said, "I have this for you." It was a box. "What's in it?," Quinn asked. "I hope it's not a bomb!" "Quinn!," Helen said. "Open it and see," Daria said. Quinn did, and a very beautiful kimono was inside. Quinn held it up to her and said, "Oh, Daria! This is so beautiful! I'm going to wear this to the next meeting of the Fashion Club!" "Man, am I ever glad to be back home," Trent said. "You know, Trent," Daria said, "I have to agree with you." Since it was the weekend when she arrived back, Daria spent Friday night at her house, then spent Saturday at Jane's place. That night, she and Trent had a frank talk about their feelings for each other, and they wound up sleeping together. It was midnight now, and they were lying in bed. Daria laid her head across Trent's chest. She was trying to find some words, but all she said at first was: "Trent, take a good look at me and ask me if I'm really small-breasted." Trent replied, "Daria, no matter now big those things are, you're still a beautiful woman to me." Daria continued, "Trent, I'm glad we finally admitted that we love each other. This has been a special night for me. But what led you to finally confess your feelings for me?" Trent began to reply: "Well, I spoke to that Mamoru cat, and he told it like it was for him when he first met that Usagi babe. He told me he once hated her and called her 'Dumpling-Head', but over time he realized how special she was to him, though he didn't have the guts to say it at first. But now they're real close, man. Mamoru gave me the courage to finally speak out. I'm glad he did." "And I'm glad he did, too," Daria said as she grabbed some body oil and began rubbing it on Trent. Daria now felt good being nude, and so did Trent. Jane heard everything that was going on through the wall and smiled to herself. "At last, my brother's admitted he's crazy for Daria," she said to herself. "Hell, maybe someday they'll get married and have kids and I'll be a good aunt to them and teach them to be artists like me!" Jane went off to sleep with a self-satisfied smirk. After spending Sunday at home, Daria returned to school. At first, she was a bit reprehensive since she was an outcast, but when she entered, it seemed everyone was asking questions about what had happened and what she did. Now, that school was letting out for the day, everyone was crowding around her. "You've just got to tell me who does your clothes," Sandi said, "that combat fatigue look is so chic!" "Want to go to my party this Friday night?," Brittany said, twirling her hair around her finger and staring into space, "I know some guys who might be interested in you!" "Thanks, but I'm already spoken for," Daria said. "You know, Daria, you're an OK person," Kevin said. "If you ever want to join the Fashion Club, you're welcome to," Stacy said. "And to think that just a few days ago, nobody wanted to talk to you," Jane said. "Well, I just hope my fifteen minutes of fame lasts a bit longer than most others," Daria said. Daria saw Quinn coming with her boyfriends Joey, Jeffy and Jamie. "And this is my heroic sister, Daria!," Quinn said. "I thought she was your cousin," Joey said. "That was all rumors!," replied Quinn. "She really is my sister, and I'm proud of it!" Suddenly, Upchuck arrived. "Hey, Quinn," Upchuck said, "want to go to my place for some tutoring, if you know what I mean? ROWR!" "Leave me alone, Upchuck!," screamed Quinn. "I'll handle this, Quinn," Daria said. "SHABON SPRAY, FREEZING!" Upchuck was frozen to his neck. "I thought you gave up all of Sailor Mercury's powers," Jane said. Daria replied, "Not all of them, Jane; after all, I have to teach some idiots here a lesson!" "C'mon," Jane said, "Let's go get a pizza!" She flung her arms around Daria and Quinn and left along with the others. Upchuck was all alone. He began to scream, "Hey, isn't anyone going to get me thawed out? Anyone? HELP!" Mr. DeMartino saw him there. "I've been waiting a long time for this, Charles," he said. "And I'm going to relish this! There's one word I've been dying to tell you for the longest time." Upchuck asked him, "And what's that, Mr. DeMartino?" Suddenly, Mr. DeMartino yelled, "SHADDUP!" He left Upchuck where he was. The lights were turned off and the doors locked. Upchuck now began to shriek in his loudest voice possible: "HELP! HELP! ANYONE! I'LL PAY A HUNDRED DOLLARS TO ANYONE WHO CAN FREE ME!" Upchuck kept this up for a few minutes, then finally said, "Why do I always get into these predicaments?" EPILOGUE A government investigation led by Representative Nagai revealed that the NIRAA was a deep-rooted conspiracy that involved some corporate executives, some non-commissioned SDF officers and even some minor bureaucrats. Massive arrests were made. Chiba Mamoru won the election to fill out Nagai's term as governor of Tokyo-to and married Usagi. They soon had a child, Chibi-Usa. The older Chibi-Usa then returned to her time. Rei took over as chief priest for the reconstructed Sendai Hill Shrine and honed her mental abilities until only Charles Xavier was a stronger telepath then her on Earth. Ami eventually did go to pre-med in Germany, and fulfilled her complete medical studies in the United States sometime later. She later joined the staff of the Mayo Clinic and helped find a cure for childhood leukemia. Makoto joined the Japanese Olympic team and won several gold medals in track and field in the 2004 Games in Athens. Gen. Torymura eventually was named to the SDF Joint Chiefs of Staff. Hamada Ieyasu declined to be awarded the Order of the Rising Sun, saying that serving his nation was reward enough. He died shortly thereafter; his ashes were scattered from his beloved Nick over Tokyo Bay. The Nick is now at the SDF museum. The Solar Warrior still fights for truth and justice to this very day; he's had various adventures which will probably someday be told in another tale. Japan truly changed from the Neo-Zero affair. It fully apologized for what it did in World War II and promised to help better relations with its neighbors and the world community at large. The Sailor Senshi are still committed to a better future for Japan and the world. A Federal investigation revealed that the Lawndale Militia had extensive firepower in reserve and that many upstanding members of the community were part of it. There were many convictions, and most were either sentenced to death or life without parole. Daria and Trent eventually married. They have a daughter, Usagi, and a son, Mamoru. Their Aunt Jane is getting their artistic talents honed. Daria eventually became a lawyer like her mother. She successfully argued the case before the Supreme Court that struck down the 1996 welfare reform laws as unconstitutional because it violated poor people's due process rights. Trent and his band Mystik Spiral eventually signed a multi-record deal with Warner Bros. records and has seven multi-platinum albums and scores of Top Ten and Number One hits. Ms. Li was eventually found guilty of embezzlement and sentenced to thirty years in jail. Mr. DeMartino then became the new principal. Highland admitted that it had used ineligible players in the game in question and forfeited it; Lawndale thus won the conference title and eventually the state title. Israeli troops wreaked their vengeance on Islamic Jihad for the JAL hijacking. The Imam al-Kabaz was killed when a missile struck his home. Outstanding indictments against the others who were involved are pending in American and Japanese courts. And, as for your announcer, he plans to finally get a good night's sleep and take a month off from his computer. He needs it. "This is the end, beautiful friend, the end." --Jim Morrison, The Doors, "The End" THE EVER-LOVIN' END! APPENDIX TO "THE MISERY SENSHI NEO-ZERO DOUBLE BLITZKRIEG DEBACLE" By Peter Guerin INTRODUCTION This appendix was designed to help explain some of the cultural aspects of Japan as well as explain some of the in-jokes in the story; since this story has a heavy anime influence, and otaku in-jokes are very much a hallmark of the business, there's plenty of them. This appendix is in two parts: Part 1 is a brief but detailed discussion of Japan in general while Part 2 is an explanation of the in-jokes by the data (or chapters) they appear in. Part 1 itself is divided into several subjects: History of Japan; Politics and Government; Religious Practices; Education; Business; and Social Conditions. I am greatly indebted to the two books I have drawn most of my source material from. I have learned more about Japan from these two books than in any encyclopedia article or news report I have read in the past twenty years. They are "The Japanese Today: Change and Continuity" by Edwin O. Reischauer (Cambridge, Massachusetts, Belknap Press of Harvard University Press, 1988), a book often cited as the definitive English-language book on Japan; the other is "Samurai from Outer Space: Understanding Japanese Animation" by Dr. Antonia Levi (Chicago, Open Court Press, 1996), which is available from Lorraine Savage's organization Anime Hasshin at PO Box 5121, Manchester NH 03108; please write to her for details about ordering this book or e-mail her at hasshin@tiac.net and mention about it to her. The historical outline as well as some information about Shinto were taken from "World Almanac 1997" (Mahwah, NJ, World Almanac Books, 1996). Since this is but a brief description of Japan, I sincerely hope that those who read this appendix will consult these references for further study; Reischauer's book should be available at any good library, and Dr. Levi's book, as mentioned, can be ordered from Anime Hasshin. ************************************************************************************* PART ONE: JAPAN IN GENERAL ************************************************************************************* 1. History Japanese history is broken down into several eras; until the so-called Meiji Restoration of 1868, they often coincided with events such as conquests, coups or changes in government structure. After 1868, eras changed when a new Emperor ascended the throne (as when the Showa Era ended and the present Heisei Era began in 1989 when then Emperor Hirohito died and his son Crown Prince Akihito acceded to the throne). Although the Christian or Common Era dating system is now used in Japan as in the rest of the world, Japanese coins to this day still bear the imperial era year instead of the calendar year (i.e. 1998 is Heisei 10). Japanese history is said to have started in 660 BC, when, according to legend, Jimmu Tenno established the Imperial Dynasty; whether or not he actually ruled all of Japan is in doubt, but he did exist, and it is true that the dynasty has ruled unbroken to the present day (Akihito being a direct descendant). Reliable records, however, only begin in AD 3rd Century and were written by the Chinese. Another aspect was that Jimmu Tenno claimed as his ancestor Amaterasu-Omikami, the Shinto Sun Goddess; this claim was not disputed until Hirohito renounced it at the insistence of American occupation forces in 1946. This divine claim of the Imperial Family's origins will be explained further in the article about religion. Japanese historical eras roughly begin with those first records and are as follows: Yamato (c. 300-592) Yamato plain conquered. Asuka (592-710) Empress Suiko ascends the throne. Nara (710-794) Heijo (later Nara) established as Japan's first capital; later moved to Nagaoka in 784. Heian (794-1185) Heian (later Kyoto) becomes the capital; remains de facto capital until 1868, when Tokyo is proclaimed the sole capital. Fujiwara (858-1160) Fujiwara-no-Yoshifusa becomes regent. Taira (1160-1185) Taira-no-Kiyomori seizes power; defeated by Minamoto-no-Yoritomo in 1185. Kamakura (1192-1333) Yoritomo becomes the first shogun or military ruler of Japan. Namboku (1334-1392) Imperial power restored by Godaigo, who later establishes the Southern Court at Yoshino in 1336. Ashikaga (1338-1573) Asikaga Takaugi restores shogunal rule. Muromachi (1392-1573) Southern and Northern Courts reunited; arrival of first Westerners--Portuguese and Jesuit priests. Sengoku (1467-1600) Onin War breaks out. Momoyama (1573-16003) Oda Nobunga enters Kyoto 1568; deposes last Ashikaga shogun in 1573; Tokugawa Ieyasu victor at Sekigahara, 1600. Edo, or Tokugawa (1603-1867) Ieyasu becomes shogun; establishes Edo (later Tokyo) as shogunal capital. Christianity stamped out and Europeans expelled; only Dutch are allowed to trade and only at Nagasaki. Japan begins to isolate itself from the rest of the world. Westerners return with a vengeance, led by US Commodore Matthew Perry in 1853, US Consul-General Townsend Harris (born in Hudson Falls, New York) negotiates first trade treaty 1858. Upstart samurai and others depose Tokugawa shogunate 1867. Meiji (1868-1912) Mutsuhito proclaimed Emperor in so-called Meiji Restoration; Tokyo proclaimed sole capital. Charter Oath, 1868; first Constitution promulgated by the "genro" or elder statesmen who actually rule in 1889; Sino-Japanese War 1894-95 and Russo-Japanese War 1904-05 big Japanese victories, especially for Imperial Navy, which gets technical assistance from British Royal Navy (their influence would be felt elsewhere, as will be explained in the article about education). Korea and Taiwan annexed as well as half of Sakhalin Island. Rapid modernization occurs. Taisho (1912-1926) Reign of Emperor Yoshihito, who is unfortunately mentally incompetent; forcing Crown Prince Hirohito to act as regent for most of his father's reign. Great Kanto Earthquake 1923 decimates most of Tokyo. Showa (1926-1989) Hirohito ascends throne; becomes longest ruling Emperor ever (he reigns almost as long as Queen Victoria). Military slowly creeps into power, first with unauthorized attack on Manchuria in 1931; in full power by 1937; Hirohito objects strongly to most of the military's actions but is powerless to stop them. Gen. Tojo Hideki becomes prime minister 1940. Japan allies itself with Nazi Germany and Fascist Italy. Surprise attack against Americans at Pearl Harbor 1941. Japan conquers most of East Asia, but almost all land is reconquered 1941-1945. Atomic bombings at Hiroshima and Nagasaki in 1945 force Hirohito to call for surrender against the wishes of his government. American occupation 1945-1952; Gen. MacArthur's staff drafts present Constitution, adopted 1947. U.S. takes Okinawa (but is returned in 1972); USSR takes Kuriles and the southern half of Sakhalin Island (they're still part of Russia to this day; the Russian possession of the Kuriles has been a source of friction between the two nations). After occupation ends, Japan recovers to become an industrial and economic powerhouse. Hirohito was the last World War II leader still in office (and the only Axis power government official still in office) when he dies. Heisei (1989-present) Akihito accedes to the throne; presides over economic crisis of 1990's. Great Kobe Earthquake 1995. ************************************************************************************* 2. Politics and Government a. Constitution Japan is governed under its present Showa or 1947 Constitution. This supplanted the original Meiji Constitution of 1889 and was drafted by the American occupation forces under the command of Gen. Douglas MacArthur. Although some view it as an American document imposed on Japan, it did take into account many of the trends that were already prevalent in Japan before the militarists took over; Japan was becoming a parliamentary democracy and a constitutional monarchy as of the British model. There were some American innovations, however, as will be explained shortly. The new instrument solidified the trend toward parliamentary democracy. The Emperor was now called "the symbol of the State and the unity of the people" while the Diet was called "the highest organ of state power" and "the sole law-making organ". Further, the famed Article 9 states that "Japan forever renounces war as a sovereign right and the maintenance of land, sea, and air forces"; this has been interpreted to mean that Japan cannot wage offensive war, but has the right to defend itself; thus the creation of the Self-Defense Forces in 1954 amid much controversy. Amendments to the constitution can be made by a two-thirds majority of both houses of the Diet, though it is silent as to whether such amendments are later to be approved by referendum as in many European nations or to be ratified by the prefectures as in the American system of ratification by states. So far, no amendments have been made. There is even a Bill of Rights like in the American Constitution; such existed in the 1889 Constitution, but had legal restrictions placed on them. There are no restrictions in the present document, though the public is enjoined to use their rights "for the public welfare". b. The Emperor and Imperial Family Presently, the Imperial Family is restricted to the immediate members. This was one of the reforms of the American occupation. Only Hirohito, Empress Nagako, Crown Prince Akihito and Hirohito's three brothers were considered to be "imperial"; even his married daughters were classed as commoners. In 1959, Akihito married Michiko Shoda (now Empress Michiko); even by pre-war standards she was a commoner (her father, however, was a respected businessman) and was the first to marry into the Imperial family (she was also the first non-Shintoist and non-Buddhist to do so; she's Catholic and went to Seishin University, a Catholic institution); they fell in love while playing tennis. The present Crown Prince is Naruhito; he too is married to a commoner named Masako Owada, and there were rumors for a while that Crown Princess Masako was unhappy about their marriage. Thankfully, the Japanese Imperial Family has been free of the tabloid controversy that has surrounded the British, Monegasque, Belgian and Dutch Royal Families, despite misgivings that still linger (especially by veterans) over what degree of guilt Hirohito had in the military government's actions. Hirohito was actually relived that he no longer had to wear a military uniform and instead wore a business suit and pursued his interests in marine biology. The Imperial Family is actually a shy, quiet, retiring family, much suited to their roles as serving as symbols of the state. Although the Emperor still takes part in some Shinto rituals, the government says they have no actual religious significance. When Shinto was declared the established religion during the Meiji Era, the Emperor was considered a god and the leader of the faith; to put it in perspective, it would be as if someone combined the Queen of England's role as temporal head of the Church of England with the spiritual leadership of the Archbishop of Canterbury and then made a living saint or a god. Shinto, however, is much more complex than that, as will be seen in the article about religion. Perhaps one of the reasons why the Japanese Imperial Family has kept itself free from controversy is that most Japanese view them now as average people; gone are the days when it was forbidden to look at the Emperor's face. Hirohito stunned everyone in 1945 when he went on the air to announce Japan's surrender to the Allies and told his countrymen to "bear the unbearable". The marriage of Akihito and Michiko stirred interest because they were in love with each other and the fact that Michiko is Catholic is not as fatal as if Prince Charles--who would be the temporal head of the Church of England when he ascends the throne--married a Catholic (which he is forbidden to do so anyway); after all, Shinto and Buddhism existed peacefully side-by-side for centuries, and after the Meiji Restoration, Christianity itself was beginning to be accepted once again (the present constitution guarantees complete religious freedom; this was no hasty decision given the toleration for Shinto and Buddhism as just mentioned). Most Japanese people accept the Imperial Family as an integral part of their government; most just don't make a big deal out of if, and there is no real movement to abolish it (even the Japanese Communist Party does not want to get rid of it). The Imperial Family lives in a palace in Tokyo that was used by the Tokugawa shoguns; it is open to the public only on two days a year: the Emperor's Birthday (December 23) and New Year's Day. The Emperor's functions--other then the non-religious role he now has in Shinto--are quite few. He signs documents such as bills and treaties, thus indicating his Imperial Assent (much like the Queen does in Britain in signifying her Royal Assent). Every December, the Emperor opens the yearly session of the Diet by reading a speech at his throne just behind the Speaker's podium in the House of Councilors, much like the Queen's Speech is read in the State Opening of Parliament every November or the President delivering his State of the Union Address to Congress every January or February. The administration of the Imperial Family's functions is handled by the Imperial Household Agency. It should be noted that the Japanese themselves do not call the Emperor by his actual name; in government documents and in news reports, he is called "His Imperial Majesty" or "the present Emperor"; even in death, he is referred to by the name given to the era of his reign; thus, Hirohito is now the Showa Emperor, and when Akihito dies, he will be known as the Heisei Emperor. c. Prime Minister and Cabinet Actual political power rests with the Prime Minister and his Cabinet (curiously, Emperors ceased to have actual political power almost a thousand years ago; even the so-called Meiji Restoration just removed power from the shogun and transferred it to the genro, or elder statesmen who engineered the coup). The Prime Minister can come from either house of the Diet, but in practice he is always from the House of Representatives, the lower house, since they have the final say on who will hold the post. The Prime Minister appoints his Cabinet of ministers. Among the most important include Education, Finance, and International Trade and Industry (MITI) . As in other parliamentary systems, the Cabinet consist of members of the party in the majority in the House of Representatives. Other functions of the national government are of agency rank, such as the Self Defense Agency and the Imperial Household Agency. d. The Diet When the Diet was first organized in 1890, it was clearly influenced by the British Parliament. In 1947, it was reorganized with some influence of American Congressional practices but is still much like Parliament. Like many national legislatures, the Diet is bicameral; that is, it consists of two houses. The upper house is called the House of Councillors, while the lower house--much like ours is in Congress--is called the House of Representatives. The House of Councillors is an entirely elected body that replaced a partially appointed, partially inherited, partially elected House of Peers from the Meiji Restoration. The House of Councillors consists of 252 members; of these, one hundred are elected from the nation at large; the other 152 are elected from each of Japan's 47 prefectures. Each prefecture has a minimum of two so that at least one member from each prefecture will stand for election during each election cycle. Tokyo Metropolitan Prefecture has the most with 8. All members of the House of Councillors serve for six-year terms, and elections are held every three years, regardless of whether the House of Representatives is also standing for election; at each election, half of the at-large membership (or 50) and half of the prefectural membership (or 76) stands for election. Therefore, the upper house of the Diet is more akin to the U.S. Senate and the Canadian Senate than the British House of Lords as in the previous House of Peers. The House of Representatives consists presently of 500 members, each elected form a prefectural constituency; each prefecture is divided into districts (or constituencies), which in turn elect from three to five members depending on the population of the constituency (the only exception is Okinawa Prefecture, which only elects one member at-large). A voter can only choose one candidate in the election, however. This rather convoluted system was seen as a compromise between the Anglo-American plurality system (where whoever has the largest amount of votes--not necessarily a majority--wins) and the European proportional representation system (where the parties are assigned seats in relation to how many votes they got in total). As in most parliamentary systems, the party that gains a simple majority of seats in the House of Representatives (or 251) gets to form the government, with the party leader becoming Prime Minister. Members of the House of Representatives serve for four years, unless (which, like many parliamentary democracies) elections are called for sooner than that by the government. As in most parliamentary systems (and unlike our Congress, where both houses are roughly equal in power), the House of Representatives has the most power; it originates revenue bills, including the budget, and can override a rejection of a bill by the upper house by two-thirds vote (which is roughly analogous to overriding a Presidential veto by Congress but different from the House of Lords delaying bills for a year). Further, the concurrence of the upper chamber is not needed for treaties, and budgetary bills become law after thirty days whether or not the upper house has voted on it (much like the House of Lords cannot defeat a Money Bill passed by the House of Commons). The typical year for the Diet starts with the State Opening in December, where all the members gather in the House of Councilors' chamber to hear the Emperor's Speech which, like the Queen's Speech in Parliament, outlines the Government's agenda for the year. Work on the budget is usually completed by April, though sessions are held in summer and fall in order to appropriate additional moneys as necessary. Both houses elect their own Speakers; the Speakers, though still tied to their parties as in the American system, must practice strict neutrality as is the case for the Speaker of the British House of Commons. History was made in 1992 when Doi Takako, a Socialist, was elected Speaker of the House of Representatives, the first woman to hold the post; Ms Doi already made history by becoming the first woman to head a political party in Japan. As is the case for Congress and Parliament, both houses have committees; among the most important are the Audit Committee and the Budget Committee; it is in the Budget Committee that questions are asked of the Government and is somewhat similar to the "Question Time" of the House of Commons which many have seen here in the U.S. on C-SPAN on Sunday nights. e. The Supreme Court One American innovation made to Japan's otherwise pure parliamentary system was the creation of a Supreme Court with the power of judicial review as in the American model. In most parliamentary systems, once a law is passed, the courts (not even the House of Lords, the highest court of appeal in Great Britain) cannot rule on its constitutionality, though in Britain, statutory instruments (the equivalent of Federal regulations) can be scrutinized to see if they fall within the scope of powers granted in the parent law. This is not the case in Japan, where the Supreme Court can rule on constitutionality. However, most of the time, the court sides with the decisions made by the Diet majority. However, the court has been a zealous defender of citizen's rights and was active in many pollution cases in the 1970's. The Prime Minister appoints the members of the Supreme Court; the Chief Judge is named by the Emperor. At the next election of the Diet after his/her appointment, the newly appointed judge stands for election, and then faces election every ten years afterward. However, most elections for the Supreme Court are uncontested and non-controversial. The Supreme Court appoints judges for the lower courts and trains prospective lawyers.. Below the Supreme Court are regional courts, prefectural courts and municipal courts. f. Law Enforcement and Justice The chief organ of law enforcement in Japan is the famed National Police, equivalent to the Royal Canadian Mounted Police or the French gendarmes. The logo--a sunburst shaped to look like a chrysanthemum--is a familiar sight all throughout Japan and can even been seen in anime regularly; it can be best seen in the TV, movie and OAV anime series "Patlabor". What makes the National Police so unique is that instead of precinct house or stations, there is a "kobun" or "police-box" in every major intersection in major cities and large house-like facilities in the countryside. The National Police have a hard-won reputation for honesty, efficiency and integrity. That is not to say that there are misgivings. They date back to the Tokugawa era, when "doshin", the lowest level of samurai, served as law enforcement officers in the urban areas. These doshin carried a weapon called a "jitte", a steel rod with a hook, that was used to disarm drunken or disorderly samurai (that weapon figures prominently in the anime series "Cyber City Oedo 808"). The reputation of the police was not helped much by the militarist rule of the 1930's, though it was also much neighborly snooping as well as the police that led to the suppression of opposition. However, by and large, the National Police are highly respected. How the police do their job is also unique. Every six months, the local unit pays a visit to their service area's residents, asking questions on the welfare of the family, what possessions they recently got, and the like. Although this may be viewed in the U.S. as an unwarranted invasion of privacy, in Japan it is viewed as a minor inconvenience to suffer for protection. In fact, outside of totalitarian nations, no one is safer in the world than in Japan. The nation has very strict gun control laws, and murder is almost unheard of (even the manufacture and possession of samurai and ninja swords is restricted). A woman can go down the street at night and schoolchildren can go to and from class without fearing that someone will molest them. The Japanese are pretty much a law-abiding people; even schoolchildren who find a one yen coin on the street (which is worth about one cent) will more often than not turn it in to the police (they get a notepad in exchange). Of course, that is not always the case. Much has been made of the yakuza, or gangs. However, they operate on different principles than the Italian or Russian Mafias and are much like the so-called "Triad Gangs" of Hong Kong. Yakuza stress the so-called "bushido" or code of honor of the old samurai. Also, unlike their counterparts in the West, they're not afraid to be open about their connections. They often own buildings, put out publications and even hand out "meisei", or calling cards with the gang's name on them. If a yakuza member messes up, don't expect to find him in the bottom of Tokyo Bay with concrete overshoes; usually they will kill themselves instead since they let their gang down. The usual trend in Western organized criminal cartels has been to downplay such connections (exceptions being seen in Al Capone and John Gotti) and to enforce discipline by "rubbing out" disloyal members. Besides the National Police, there are local police departments as well; the most famous is the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department (TMPD). However, the chiefs of all local police forces are answerable to the Chief of the National Police. The National Police also have a special unit called the Mobile Unit, which specializes in riot control (which it has been called on to do many times in postwar Japan); the image of the Mobile Unit officer in riot gear, nightstick and body length shield is known throughout the world. As far as prosecution is concerned, Japanese law enforcement has been pretty good in getting criminals to confess. Though excessive force is rarely used, sometimes it is needed, though that has further lent to the reputation of cautious suspicion of the police. As far as the judicial process is concerned, Japan has been surprisingly known more for its leniency than for any severity. How a defendant acts while at trial weighs as much if not more than his actions prior to trial. Signs of remorse could help reduce a sentence. Case in point: the sentence handed to the American servicemen in 1995 for raping a schoolgirl in Okinawa (ten years hard labor) might seen severe in our eyes, but to the Japanese it was appropriate since the suspects showed no remorse for their actions. Prosecutors (equivalent to our DA's) often have a 99% conviction rate. Further, until the Tokugawa era, there was no capital punishment. It was first instituted during that era in the form of crucifixion, which the leadership found out about from the Jesuit priests who had visited in the 16th Century. Today, the method of execution is hanging. Japan's system of law is based more on the code system of Europe than on the Anglo-American common law, though some common law concepts have taken hold in postwar Japan. g. Local Government Local government in Japan is pretty clear-cut. The highest form of local government are the 47 prefectures. In theory, there are four types of prefectures: 1) Most--43--are called "ken", or regular prefectures; many of them are named after an important city (such as Nagano-ken, Nagasaki-ken or Saga-ken); 2) Hokkaido, the northernmost prefecture (and the most rural) is a "do", or circuit prefecture; 3) Osaka and Kyoto are "fu", or municipal prefectures; and 4) Tokyo is a "to", or metropolitan prefecture (that last status is roughly equivalent to Washington being in the District of Columbia or Mexico City being in the Federal District or Canberra being in Australian Capitol Territory). All prefectures, however, have the same government structure: they have an elected governor and a unicameral (one-house) prefectural assembly. Below the prefectures are municipalities. There are three types, depending on population: 1) villages have fewer than 30,000 residents; 2) towns have between 30,000 and 50,000 residents; and 3) cities have more than 50,000 residents. All three forms of municipalities have an elected mayor and council; councilmen are elected at-large from all villages, towns and small cities, while in larger cities they are elected by "ku" or wards like American city councilmen often are (it is of note that although Tokyo itself is divided into wards, it has no city government; it is instead governed by its prefectural governor and prefectural assembly; thus Gov. Nagai in my story governs Tokyo and the rest of the municipalities of Tokyo-to directly). h. Defense Since 1954, Japan has relied on its Self-Defense Force for protection. These replaced the old Imperial Army, Imperial Army Air Force and Imperial Navy of World War II. First controversial, the SDF has been accepted by the Japanese as necessary to protect their peaceful society (after all, Switzerland, which is neutral as well as peaceful, depends on its armed forces to keep it that way). Interestingly, many of the companies that made armaments for Japan during World War II are still making them for the SDF; Mitsubishi, which made the infamous A6M fighter (known here as the Zero) made the F-4EJ Phantom, based on the McDonnell-Douglas F-4 Phantom II. The SDF is divided into Ground, Air and Sea Divisions. Interestingly, Japan is now the third highest spender for defense in terms of GDP (gross domestic product) in the world. However, much of Japan's defense is still reliant on American troops, as per a 1951 Security Agreement that has been renewed in 1960 and 1970. The bases, mainly in Okinawa-ken, have been a source of controversy, however, as the unfortunate case of the raping of a schoolgirl in 1995 brought out. One further curiosity: the version of the national flag that was used by the militarist regime--an off-centered red "Rising Sun" with red rays on a white field--survives today as the ensign of the Sea Self-Defense Force. i. Political Parties Japan has several political parties. The best known is the right-of-center Liberal Democratic Party, which--except for a couple of breaks--has governed since 1955. Others include the Socialist, Democratic Socialist, Communist, and the Komeito, or Clean Government, which gets its backing from the Soka Gakki sect of Buddhism. To put the parties in the traditional left-to-right political spectrum, they would run thus: Communist, Socialist, Democratic Socialist, Liberal Democratic, and Komieto. More recently, a group of break-away LDP members have formed the Democratic Party, which posed a serious challenge in the recent elections for the House of Councillors. One surprising thing about the LDP is that it is composed of various factions, usually built around a leader or around a stand on various areas of controversy. However, despite that, the LDP as a whole functions rather well, and is a cross between the weak, decentralized party system of the United States and the strong, centralized, disciplined parties of Great Britain and Europe. The other parties, however, are more centralized and disciplined (especially the Communists and Komieto). Recently, the LDP has suffered some major setbacks. In the most recent elections for the House of Councillors in 1995 and 1998, it lost control of that house. Some experts (though they've been long been saying this for years) are saying that it is only a matter of time before the LDP loses its majority in the House of Representatives as well. Some, of course, dismiss that notion, but then again, no one thought the Democrats were going to lose control of Congress in 1994, either. ************************************************************************************* 3. Religious Practices Japan today has three religions of note: 1) Shinto, the indigenous religion; 2) Buddhism, which was imported from China and Korea; and 3) a small but considerable Christian minority. a. Shinto Shinto is the Chinese word for what the Japanese call "Kami no Michi"; both terms mean "the way of the gods". Shinto is the oldest of the three religions in Japan and the only one that developed in Japan itself. In describing Shinto, there are several areas that have to be looked at: 1) its pantheon, or group of gods; 2) the role of the priests; 3) places of worship; 4) moral code and sacred texts; 5) development; and 6) Shinto today. At eight million "kami" (gods) and "megami" (goddesses), Shinto has the most complex pantheon of any major world religion. The best known to Americans is Amaterasu-Omikami, the Great Heaven Shining Deity who serves as the Sun Goddess. However, she does not hold the place of being the head of the Shinto pantheon as Zeus did to the Greeks or Odin to the Vikings, despite the fact that she figures prominently due to Jimmu Tenno--the legendary first Emperor of Japan--claiming her as an ancestor. In fact, when one looks at Shinto, it's hard to tell what god or what priest or whoever at all is in charge. If ever there was a religion so decentralized, Shinto is it. Much of that decentralization and complexity was due to the attempts by Buddhist monks and Shinto priests alike to equate their gods with the other religion's pantheon, not unlike what the Romans did when they appropriated the Greek pantheon for themselves (i.e. Zeus becomes Jupiter, Hera becomes Juno, etc.). Other gods besides Amaterasu-Omikami include her brother, Susano, God of the Wind and of Yomi, the World of the Dead (unlike Buddhism and Christianity, and much like the ancient Greeks, Shinto holds that all who die--good, bad or indifferent--go to Yomi; there's nothing like Heaven or Hell in Shinto); Kannon, the Goddess of Mercy (who figures in the anime "Doomed Megalopolis"), Benton, the Goddess of Luck and Womanly Arts (she figures prominently in Rumiko Takahashi's classic TV anime series "Urusei Yatsura") and Uzume, the Dread Queen of Heaven. There are also the original gods, Izamagi and Izanami, who created Japan by stirring up mud from the ocean floor with their spear. The other gods and goddesses as well as the Japanese are supposed to be descended from them, or so the legend goes. It is easy to tell Shinto priests from Buddhist monks and priests. Shinto priests usually wear a white robe and a hakama, which are loose-fitting trousers. Hakama can be blue, red or even white. Special robes and headdresses are worn for special occasions. Unlike other religions, women have very much an equal role in Shinto as the men. In fact, Shinto priestesses are called "miko". Miko usually are called to cast out evil demons and interpret the will of the gods. Perhaps the best known miko to American fans of anime is Hino Rei (or Raye Hino), miko of Sendai Hill Shrine (or Cherry Hill Temple) in Naoko Takeuchi's hit series "Bishojo Senshi Sailor Moon". Others include Sakura from "Urusei Yatsura", Keiko from "Doomed Megalopolis" and Ayaka Kisaragi of "Phantom Quest Corporation". When exorcising demons, they usually throw a scroll with the Japanese phrase "Akuryo taisan," which means, "Begone, demon!" and usually shout that phrase out as well (DIC really dropped the ball on that score when they dubbed "Sailor Moon" into English; Sailor Mars winds up saying "I call forth the power of Mars" when she throws the scroll). Miko, in other words, were for centuries the original "Ghostbusters," without benefit of proton packs or snotty Brooklynese-sounding secretaries. Shinto places of worship are called shrines. They are distinguished by their "torii" or gateways that stand in front of them. Sendai Hill Shrine in "Sailor Moon" is such a Shinto shrine (once again DIC muffed it up by calling it Cherry Hill Temple; temples are Buddhist places of worship). Among the more famous are Meiji Shrine in Tokyo (dedicated to the Meiji Emperor); Yasukuni Shrine, also in Tokyo (which serves roughly as their Arlington Cemetery/Tomb of the Unknown Soldier); the shrine to Amaterasu-Omikami in Ine; and Itsukushima Shrine on Miyajima in the Inland Sea, considered one of the "Three Famous Landscapes of Japan" due to the torii being right out in the sea. Shinto is unique among the world's major religions in that it has no moral code or sacred texts as such. There is nothing in Shinto equivalent to the Ten Commandments or the Golden Rule; its only concerns are about purity of body and mind (which is why Japanese love bathing) and an abhorrence of death (Yomi, the World of the Dead, is thought to be a place of corruption and decay). Thus almost all funerals in Japan are Buddhist rites, since Buddhism at least has some sense of Heaven and Hell. That is also why morality in Japan is not based on religion as much as it is on human relations, which was taken from Confucianism. As for sacred texts, the closest are the "Nihongi" and the "Kojiki", both written in AD 8th Century. Both contain myths and legends about the Shinto pantheon and some early history of Japan; however, since different versions of the myths circulated at the time, the scribes wrote all the versions down. Shinto had a gradual development over the centuries. As stated, the myths were only written down in AD 8th Century. The arrival of Buddhism complicated matters somewhat; for the first and perhaps only time in human history, a nation allowed two religions to coexist peacefully. In fact, Shinto priests and Buddhist monks worked out ways in describing their pantheons in terms of the other religion's gods. Matters, however, took a drastic turn in the Meiji Restoration, when the genro declared Shinto the established religion in imitation of the European powers. This stage of "State Shinto," however, was more patriotic and militaristic in bent than religious, and when the religion was disestablished at the insistence of American occupation forces, it returned to its peaceful ways. During this time, the divine origin of the Emperor was especially stressed, though Hirohito denounced all divine claims in 1946, once again at the insistence of the Americans. Today Shinto is still practiced, but it has become more peripheral in Japanese life, though there are still throngs of faithful followers and the most popular shrines still get many visitors. Since it was disestablished as the state religion, Shinto has splintered into thirteen sects; the most important among them is Tenriko, based in Tenri City in Nara-ken; healing by faith plays a central role in that sect. Many Japanese still observe some important days in Shinto, especially the ritual of taking children to the local shrine at three, five and seven years of age. People still buy good luck charms for all occasions: to do well in school; for a safe journey; for safe driving (like Miyuki did in Part 3 of "You're Under Arrest!"); etc. Frankly, most Japanese, though registered as belonging to one faith or another, profess to not following any at all. This is not to say that they're either agnostic or atheist; they just do not feel that it plays a significant role in their lives. To them religion is not an opiate of the people or a crutch much as it is time-honored traditions that they dutifully carry on like the day's business and then pass on to their children like a cherished family heirloom. b. Buddhism If Shinto has suffered some setbacks in the 20th Century, Buddhism has continued to flourish. Imported from China and Korea, the major sects of Buddhism in Japan include Zen, Shingon, Soka Gakki, Trantric, Pure Land, True Land and Nichiren. In Buddhism--an offshoot of India's Hinduism--it was held that one could achieve Nirvana by overcoming human desires that enslave humans to the cycle of reincarnation and karma. Of course the most famous aspect of Buddhism to Americans is Zen meditation, where Buddhist monks sit in lotus positions and chant. Buddhist places or worship are called temples, and there are monasteries as well. The most famous Buddhist festival in Japan is Bon, where the faithful launch miniature lighted boats into the water in memory of departed souls. c. Christianity Surprisingly, about 2% of Japanese are Christians. Christianity was brought over by St. Francis Xavier in 1549. About 500,000 were converted before the Tokugawa shogunate stamped out the faith in 1638. After the Meiji Restoration, Christianity was at least tolerated again, and the 1947 Constitution granted complete religious freedom (which is not a stretch considering that Shinto and Buddhism coexisted without conflict for centuries). The Japanese Christian community is evenly split between Catholic and Protestant. As for the Catholics, it has been noted that Empress Michiko is herself a Catholic, and one of the most beautiful Catholic cathedrals in Asia stands in Nagasaki (it survived the atomic bombing of 1945). As for Protestants, 40% of them belong to the United Church of Christ in Japan; although this was a creation of the 1930's military regime, it had its roots back to a "No Church" movement started by Chimura Kanzo, who thought that sectarianism was repugnant. The second biggest group of Protestants belong to the Lutheran Church--Missouri Synod. There is a far-wider acceptance of Christianity in Japan today than ever before; Christmas has even become a "semi-official" holiday there, though admittedly some of the meaning is lost in the translation, and New Year's Day is the big family holiday for that time of the year there. ************************************************************************************* 4. Education Japan has been the envy of the world for its educational system. One of the reasons for Japan's sudden success (especially after World War II) has been that is has among the most highly educated people in the world. When the educational system was reformed after the war, it was molded after the American system. There are six years of elementary school; three of junior high; three of high school and four of university. Education to the ninth grade is free and compulsory, though most do go to high school and a considerable number go to college. The educational system is a mixture of public, private and parochial institutions as in the United States. Overseeing the entire educational system is the Education Ministry, which has broad powers to approve textbooks (the ministry has taken some heat in this regard as to how Japan's involvement in World War II is portrayed), appropriate money, and set curriculum. There are local Boards of Education, but these are appointed by local mayors and prefectural governors and usually take their cues from the national ministry. As for universities, the most famous is Tokyo University, the first of the "national universities". Other national universities are Kyoto, Tohoku, Kyushu and Hokkaido. Below these are the private universities, the most famous being Keio and Waseda, and junior colleges, or as the Japanese call them "short-term universities". Japanese education is rather strenuous; teaching is committed to memory and is by rote, especially in learning the Japanese written language. Many students go to a special "juku" or cram school so they can prepare for the important examinations for high school and university; in "Bishojo Senshi Sailor Moon", Mizuno Ami goes to a "juku" (DIC flubbed it up when it introduced Amy; she says that she goes to a special computer school, but the monster that attacks her school calls it a cram school). The strenuous time leading to the exams is called "examination Hell" and rather overbearing mothers who oversee all aspects of their children's education are called "education mothers" (Usagi's mother in "Sailor Moon" is such a "education mother"; she often scolds her for her lazy study habits). Perhaps the most well-known aspect of Japanese education as far as American fans of anime is concerned is that most students wear uniforms. The generic term for that is "seifuku". Elementary schoolchildren often wear sweaters with the school crest embalzoned on them and either knickers or knee-length pants for boys or knee-length skirts for girls; also, they often wear white hats going to and from school (so they can be seen easier in traffic). In junior high school (and in some high schools), the boys wear what looks like a Chinese aristocrat's outfit: a navy blue suit with big brass buttons and a high collar. As for the girls, the most well-known outfit is the "seirafuku" or sailor suit. This is actually adapted from the uniforms worn by enlisted sailors in the Imperial Japanese Navy in the late 19th Century and early 20th Century, and itself was based on those worn by sailors in the British Royal Navy, which lent technical assistance to Japan at that time. The seirafuku is a sailor blouse with the sailor collar, a scarf and usually a blue pleated skirt (though the actual colors will vary with the school); further, as in naval tradition, there is a blue outfit for winter and a white outfit for summer. Among the more famous seirafuku-clad heroines in anime include A-ko Magami from "Project A-ko"; all of the Sailor Senshi from "Sailor Moon" (theirs are a bit modified; they're sleeveless shirts, miniskirts and either go-go boots a/la/Nancy Sinatra or high heeled shoes); All-Purpose Cultural Cat Girl Nuku-Nuku; the Legendary Magic Knights of "Magic Knight Rayearth"; and Lum from "Urusei Yatsura". There's actually been an industry built around magazines and pin-up photos of seirafuku-clad schoolgirls in Japan (though some of it goes over the line into pornography). In high school, three-piece business suits are worn by both boys and girls (blazer, vest, collared shirt, tie, and pants or skirt). Uniforms used to be mandated at universities, but now they're not. ************************************************************************************* 5. Business One of the amazing aspects of Japan was its ability to rapidly convert from a medieval economy to a modern capitalist economy in the space of about a century and a half. Today Japan has one of the most modern and internationally competitive economic climates in the world. The floodgates for such change were opened during the Meiji Restoration. Some of the companies well known on both sides of the Pacific got their start then like Mitsubishi and Matsushita, though some like Mitsui and Kikkoman (the soy sauce maker) had their roots back to Tokugawa times, others like Toyota were founded in the early 20th Century and some like Sony were founded after World War II (the founders began by scrounging bombed out areas of Tokyo to salvage radio parts!). Some of these companies were actually founded by old samurai families. From the Meiji Restoration to the end of World War II, the companies that dominated were called "zaibatsu". These zaibatsu usually centered around a bank and had heavy industries, aerospace, chemicals, and other companies built around them. They were not constructed haphazardly like American conglomerates, nor did most act like monopolies; often even two divisions of the same zaibatsu found themselves in competition with each other as well as other companies; though, especially during the war, cartels often were formed. After the war, these zaibatsu were broken up at American insistence. However, many of these companies still have their old names, even if they're not part of the company anymore (i.e. Mitsubishi Heavy Industries, Mitsubishi Bank). Often, in Japan, the brand name used in the United States is as well known as the Japanese brand, though some changes are made; in Japan, Matsushita's principal electronics company, Panasonic, is actually known as National, while the famed Bridgestone tires is actually the transliteration of the last name of the person who founded the company. However, in Japan, a Canon is a Canon and a Nikon is a Nikon. One aspect known to Americans is the famed lifetime employment practices. Once a person (who is hired after passing examinations) is taken on, he can usually count on being there until he retires, usually at 55. However, this normally applies only to male office workers, called "salarymen" and usually doesn't include factory workers or female workers, who are called "OL" or office ladies; these ladies, usually wearing a blue suit, usually wait upon visitors to the company, serve secretarial duties and pour tea (much like American secretaries are usually expected to pour coffee for the boss). With the recent economic downturn, however, these practices have taken somewhat of a beating (though to be fair, the CEO of Ban Dai, the toymaker, said he wouldn't hesitate to fire those who didn't agree with him or did their best). One assumption made about Japanese business is that it's mainly non-union. Nothing could be further from the truth. There are three important unions: Sohyo (which covers white collar workers and government employees), Domei (consisting of blue-collar workers) and Nikkyoso (which represents teachers and professors). Management-labor relations are not as antagonistic as they are in the United States; though there's the famed "spring offensive" for better wages and working conditions, these are mainly peaceful demonstrations held before the day's work begins; real strikes that cripple production rarely occur. Further, instead of defending obsolete jobs by "featherbedding", the unions and the companies help affected employees retrain for new jobs in the same company. Further, locals of unions are not organized by geographic region as much as they are organized by a company-to-company basis (i.e. one local covers Mitsubishi employees; another covers those of Toyota). Another hallmark of Japanese business is that decisions are usually made on a consensus basis. Major decisions are made after consultation with middle and lower management as well as the actual workers. This sharply contrasts to what we're accustomed to in the United States: the image of a Julius Caesar Dithers or an Ebeneezer Scrooge or a Cosmo Spacely or a Sylvester Slate yelling at his employees to get to work and that they'll not be getting a raise. Such persons are viewed as downright dictatorial in Japanese terms. The Japanese generally are hard-working people and have deep devotion to the companies that employ them; most workers and management do not wish to do anything that would harm the company's long-term outlook. Another matter that needs to be looked at is what happens at the beginning of the day. Usually the employees gather in a large building, where they sing the company song and hear the company creed read aloud. Then usually a brief pep talk is held as well as an overview of the day's business. One aspect of Japanese business that has dramatically improved is quality control. William Deming arrived after the war to teach quality control to the Japanese; they listened and learned very well. By the 1980's, the term "Made in Japan" was no longer a joke; it became a symbol of quality. The Japanese MITI (Ministry of International Trade and Industry) even gives out an award called the Deming Prize to the company that has the best quality control. ************************************************************************************* 6. Social Conditions One last area that needs to be looked at is the condition of society in Japan. Several areas naturally suggest themselves: 1.) Morality; 2.) Mass Media; 3.) The Status of Women; 4.) The Status of Children; 5.) Individuals vs. Groups; and 6.) Hierarchy. a. Morality The Japanese, contrary to popular belief, are not amoral or immoral. They are a very moral people. However, their basis for their morality is different than what we're used to seeing in the West. The Judeo-Christian morality is based on religion. We have our Ten Commandments, the Golden Rule, etc. Japanese, however, view morality as a product of human relations. As stated, Shinto has nothing that says "Thou shalt not do this or that"; it is merely a religion that celebrates the beauty of nature and of life (Shinto services are rather loud, boisterous affairs, and consumption of alcohol, especially sake or beer, is common); further, while Buddhism does have a moral code, it is downplayed in Japan mainly because most become Buddhist (other than those who adhere to it for life) upon death, and most funerals are Buddhist, and even the Buddhist concept of Heaven and Hell is not stressed as much. The Japanese view the Universe mainly as an amoral, indifferent place, and that death (as symbolized by Yomi in Shinto) is a place of corruption and decay; to Shinto, death is oblivion; there's no Heaven, Hell, Nirvana or Paradise. The morals that the Japanese have are mainly based on Confucianism and the complex relationships that Kung Fu-tzu (or Master Kung, as he's always called by Asians) himself formulated. After all, it was Master Kung who formulated the precept to treat others in the same manner that you wish to be treated yourself (I think that sounds better than the old "Do unto others. . ."); Confucianism itself is called by East Asians "the philosophy of the teachers". It is for those reasons that matters that to us may be downright immoral or at least indecent are dismissed as trivial by the Japanese. For instance, other than on HBO or Cinemax, one wouldn't dare show a topless lady in prime time television here in the United States; in Japan, nudity is accepted since families often bathe together and mixed bathing in public places often occurs. There is the inevitable culture clash, though: A Christian group screamed blue murder at 20th Century-Fox when it distributed the Hayao Miyazaki classic "My Neighbor Totoro" because the father of the two girls was bathing with them; there was a similar scene in an episode of "Sailor Moon" where the Tsukino family is bathing together at a typical Japanese resort. However, both scenes are shown in Japan without much ado. Sure, there's the scene in "Project A-ko" where A-ko takes off her nightshirt, runs topless to her closet and grabs a bra and a scene in "Burn Up! W" where officer Rio nude bungee jumps, and all those nude scenes and breast jokes in "Ranma 1/2" (which was created by a woman, by the way), but perhaps the best known nude scenes (other than those in "spooge" or pornographic efforts like "Urostukidoji: Legend of the Overfiend" or "Venus 5") is the "transformation sequence" in "magic girl" shows like "Sailor Moon" or "Magic Knight Rayearth" (just to be fair, Son Goku romps in the altogether quite frequently in "Dragon Ball"). This was actually created by one of Japan's more controversial anime creators, Go Nagai, for his android heroine Cutey Honey. This could also explain why the Japanese are not as alarmed at pornography like we are here. Pornography is not viewed as evil over there, though until recently the only restriction placed on it was that nude photographs could not have any pubic hair displayed (the yakuza made a killing illegally importing American versions of "Playboy" and "Penthouse" for that reason). What the West seems to forget is that nude does not always equal sexy, especially if it involves women's breasts. Seeing A-ko nude wasn't made to titillate; it just proves just how human she really is beneath her superhuman exterior (after all, when was the last time you saw a teenage Clark Kent wake up late for school?). Another area where Japanese morality is different from the West's is in alcohol. The Japanese are no more as prone to alcoholism than the French. Of course, sake, or rice wine, is popular, but so is beer (one brand known to Americans is Kirin). The Japanese do seem to become drunk easier than most; some say that is due to a lack of an enzyme that processes alcohol. Drunkenness is almost freely forgiven, the only exception is for DWI; being caught DWI even once results in having your license revoked for life. Alcoholic consumption is often part of business meetings, family affairs and even Shinto religious festivals (where even teenagers are inebriated). Sometimes, students do have a beer during study time (as in a couple of scenes in "Here is Greenwood") but it doesn't seem to affect their study habits. It may help that a person has to be 19 (starting in 1999, 20) before he or she can get a driver's license in explaining the lack of an adolescent drinking problem in Japan. Sex is another area of difference in Japanese vs. Western morality. The Japanese view sex as just part of nature. There was once a double standard (all too well-known to us here) of men being promiscuous and women having to be "pure", though this is disappearing. Further, teenage sex and pregnancy rarely occur because of the high supervision such teens have at home and at school. If extramarital sex (at the teenage or adult level) occurs, it is the results and not the actual act that most people worry about. The most famous difference is in the view of suicide. In the West, suicide is as big (if not bigger) a sin than to kill others. However, the Japanese feel that suicide is an honorable option out of a drastic situation if all others have been exhausted. This, of course, had its heyday during the shogunal times, where samurai often committed seppuku if captured or faced other situations. Seppuku is the preferred term for what is known in the West as hara-kiri; although both mean, "slitting of the belly", hara-kiri carries a negative connotation. Further, not all seppuku was committed the same way. Traditionally, seppuku was committed by taking the blade of the samurai sword, slitting the abdomen with it and then cutting the neck (if someone was assisting, he delivered a blow to the back of the neck with a second sword). However, women committed seppuku differently. They stabbed themselves through the neck. Seppuku rarely occurs today; hanging is now the preferred method. b. Mass Media Mass media is about as powerful in Japan as it is in the U. S. Several areas once again suggest themselves naturally: 1) Print media; 2) Sports; 3) Movies and TV; and 4) Music Japanese are very avid readers. Perhaps the most famous publications to Americans are "manga", or comic books. Tezuka Osamu, the legendary creator of "Tetsuwan Atom" and "Jungle Taitei" (or as we know them here "Astro Boy" and "Kimba the White Lion") almost single-handedly created the medium after the war, in fact, he is still called "manga no kami-sama", or "the god of comics" in Japan and has a museum dedicated to him. Tezuka has been called "The Walt Disney of Japan", though he seems to be more suited to be Japan's Stan Lee or Siegel and Shuster. There have been other famous manga artists like Monkey Punch ("Lupin III: Tales of the Wolf"); Go Nagai ("Shameless School"; "Cutey Honey"; "TranZor Z"); Rumiko Takahashi ("Urusei Yatsura"; "Ranma 1/2"); the four-woman studio CLAMP ("Magic Knight Rayearth"; "Tokyo Babylon"; "RG Veda"); Matsamune Shirow ("Dominion Tank Police"; "Ghost in the Shell") and Naoko Takeuchi ("Sailor Moon"). In fact, it's been estimated that two out of every five publications sold in Japan are manga, and such publications as "Shonen Jump" (the home of Akira Toryama's "Dragon Ball") have among the highest circulations of any publication in the world. Japan also has some well-known newspapers and magazines. Among the best known newspapers are "Yomiuri Shimbun"; "Asahi Shimbun"; "Mainichi Shimbun"; "Samkei"; "Nihon Keizai" (their equivalent to our "Wall Street Journal"); "Hokkaido Shimbun"; "Tokyo Shimbun"; "Chunichi"; "Nishi Nippon" and "Japan Times" (which is printed in English). Magazines do not play as much a role in Japan as they do in the U.S., but there are specialized magazines covering various hobbies and special interests. The Japanese are avid sports fans. There are, of course, some sports that originated in Japan itself. Sumo wrestling, where tall, large, muscular men grapple with each other and try to push the other person out of the ring, is the best known; sumo has some connections to Shinto, and recently an American, Akebono, made history by becoming the first foreigner to become grand champion in the sport. More recently, one of the "basho" or tournaments was held in Vancouver, Canada; only a few times have basho been held outside of Japan. Jujitsu and judo (which developed out of jujitsu) are the best known martial arts, as is kendo, or fencing with bamboo sticks. However, the best known sport to Americans is actually a sport Americans themselves created: baseball. Japan has two major leagues: The Central League and the Pacific League, both with six teams each. At the end of each season, they play a Japan Series much like our World Series. Sadaharo Oh, who played for the Tokyo Yomiuri Giants, hit 868 home runs, or 113 more than Hank Aaron; another player once had an "iron man" streak longer than Lou Gherig's, though Cal Ripken eventually broke even that one! There is a minor league system like we have here as well. Soccer, American rules football, basketball and even hockey are beginning to attract crowds now (all four major leagues here in the U.S. have played exhibition games in Japan, and even some regular season games). Japan has hosted three Olympics: the 1964 Summer Games in Tokyo; the 1972 Winter Games in Sapporo and the 1998 Winter Games in Nagano. In 2002, Japan will co-host the World Cup Soccer Tournament with South Korea, a first for the event. Japanese are also very avid movie and TV watchers. Outside Hollywood, Japan is a leading producer of films and are avid moviegoers (though India has even more productive studios and even more avid moviegoers). Perhaps the best known movie studios are Toho (home to Godzilla, or as the Japanese call him, Gojira) and Toei (home to "Go Renjaa", or as we know them, "Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers"). The best known director to Americans is Akira Kurosawa; his films include "Rashomon" (a story told in several different points of view); "The Seven Samurai" (which served as the basis for the American Western "The Magnificent Seven") and "Ran" (which is essentially William Shakespeare's "King Lear" set in feudal Japan). There are other well-known films; one that made a lot of noise recently was "Shall We Dance?", which was about a salaryman who takes up ballroom dancing. However, the best known films to Americans are the "kaiju" or rubber-suited monster movies. The best known, of course, is 1954's "Godzilla: King of the Monsters" (the scenes with Raymond Burr in them were added by the American distributor); others include "Mothra"; "Ghirda"; "Gamera"; and "Rodan". The Japanese are also well known for some several science-fiction efforts like "Johnny Soko and his Flying Robot" (which served as the inspiration for "Giant Robo") and "Zeiram" (which inspired "Iria: Zeiram the Animation"). Japanese TV is a mixture of American and British practices. As in the U.S and the U. K., the networks themselves are a mixture of public and private companies. The best known is Nippon Hoso Kyoku, or NHK, which translates to Japan Broadcasting Office, or Japan Broadcasting Corporation. NHK is Japan's PBS; in fact, it is two networks. One has educational fare like PBS; the other has the type of programs that American TV networks present. There are commercial networks that either have a national reach or are seen regionally, like Asahi TV (home to "Sailor Moon"); Tokyo Broadcasting System; and Fuji TV. There are no seasons as such as in the U.S.; shows continue until they reach a logical ending. However, a popular show can go on for several seasons and sometimes its title will be altered to stress that fact (for instance, "Sailor Moon"; "Sailor Moon R"; etc.). You don't need a license to own a TV in Japan as is the case in Great Britain; however, NHK gets its funding from a special tax imposed on TV's. Overall, the actual programming is more like American TV than British, with an emphasis on comedy and drama. The best known TV and movies to most Americans are anime and "sentai", or "battle team" shows. Sentai has been around almost as long as anime. Among the earliest was "Ultraman". The best known, however, is the aforementioned "Go Renjaa"; though several others have made their way here like "Masked Rider"; "Superhuman Samurai Cyber Squad"; "VR Troopers" and "Big Bad Beetleborgs". As for anime, the list of well-known TV shows, movies and OAV's (original animation videos, or direct-to-video releases) is vast: "Astro Boy"; "Speed Racer" (or "Mach Go Go Go"); "Robotech" (or "Superdimensional Fortress Macross"); "Kimba the White Lion"; "Sailor Moon"; "Dragon Ball"; "Project A-ko"; "Bubblegum Crisis"; "Dominion Tank Police"; "Patlabor"; "You're Under Arrest!"; "Battle of the Planets" (or "Science Ninja Team Gatchaman"); "Burn Up!"; "Urotsukidoji: Legend of the Overfiend"; "Samurai Pizza Cats"; "Star Blazers" (or "Space Battleship Yamato"); and "Urusei Yatsura", just to name but a few. One form of TV drama has been catching on with Americans recently: the live-action samurai show. One that is getting attention has been "Lone Wolf and Cub", based on the famous manga of the same name. One more matter before I move away from anime; recently, much has been made of an actress calling herself Apollo Smile; she calls herself the first "living" anime character. She bleached her hair blonde and done it up in ponytails and has her own anime and manga series as well as some hit tunes in Japan. Recently, she hosted the Sci-Fi Channel's "Anime Week '98" festival. She also seems to speak very fluent English. As far as music is concerned, perhaps the best known to American anime fans are the "pop idol" singers. If the 1960's and the alternative-rock scene of the 1990's were rife with here-today-gone-tomorrow bands and singers, for pop idol, that has been the case for decades. Today's hot singer may be a has-been by the next month. However, there have been a few bands and singers that have attracted attention in America. Perhaps the best known to teenagers and twentysomethings is the heavy metal band Loudness, who once toured with Quiet Riot; they contributed two songs to the anime film "Odin: Photon Space Sailer Starlight". Also well known is Hiroshima, whose musical influences are more toward classical Japanese than modern rock; they did a song that appeared in "Star Trek V: The Final Frontier". There was a singing duo called Pink Lady who had their own short-lived TV series on NBC in the early 1980's (which featured actor-magician Jeff Altman); another band, The Plastics, made an appearance on the Canadian comedy series "Second City Television" ("SCTV"). Recently, Ciba Matto, a couple of Japanese women living in New York City, have attracted media attention, as well as Buffalo Daughter (the white rap band the Beastie Boys signed them to their Grand Royal label). Of course, there's also Yoko Ono, widow to former Beatle John Lennon. One well-known alternative rock band from Japan is Shonen Knife. A year or so back, there was even a computer-generated idol singer, "DK 95", or Date Kyoko as she was also known; however, anime had beaten her to the punch earlier than that: there was the virtual idol Sharon Apple in "Macross Plus". c. The Status of Women It has been said that Japanese women are far behind American and European woman as far as equality is concerned. While it is true that they are behind in some areas as compared to their Western counterparts, they are in fact treated better than in comparable areas of Asia, where many nations follow Islam, and women of course have to go out covered literally from head to foot. Historically speaking, woman have in some aspects been treated better in Japan than in other ancient cultures. Granted, samurai women were often treated as inferior wedding pawns, but in the countryside women often ran the rice paddies; this is especially true today, since in many instances the husband and children are now often than not seeking employment outside of the farm, and the children often leave for the big city. As stated earlier, Shinto and Buddhism are among a small number of major religions where woman have almost an equal role as men: there are female Buddhist monks and the aforementioned Shinto "miko" or priestesses. As far as women in the suburbs and the cities, they have far more power than most Western authorities about Japan give them credit for. Although there are still quite a few stay-at-home mothers (as in the U.S., career women have grown, but not as much or as fast as here, since women workers are still considered temporary workers), they have powers that American feminists would not have thought possible. They have vast financial powers, including: control of the family budget; keeping their husbands on a strict allowance; decide what major purchases will be made; and often vigorous oversee their children's education (like Tsukino Ikuko does on "Sailor Moon", much to Usagi's chagrin!). Often it's been said that these powers make Japanese husbands rather meekish; perhaps to an extent it is true, but when most salarymen are out from dawn to late at night on their jobs or at hostess bars, women often are "wearing the pants in the family". To be fair, there are feminist organizations in Japan. However, the militaristic approach of an organization like NOW is not the Japanese approach. While it is true that Japanese women face the same "glass ceiling" as their American sisters, they prefer to go around it rather than smashing it. Many women therefore go into business for themselves (some examples in anime: Osaka Naru's mother in "Sailor Moon" runs her own jewelry store; in "Bubblegum Crisis", Linna is an exercise instructor.). Perhaps one of the most female-friendly businesses has been anime; among the most famous female anime artists have included Rumiko Takahashi; Naoko Takeuchi, the four-women studio CLAMP; Haigo Moto; and Kei Kunosake. Literature has also been female-friendly; in fact, the most famous Japanese novel (and the first ever written in history), "The Tale of Genji", was written by Lady Shikibu Murasaki in the 11th Century. Most American feminists, however, think of the Japanese approach to sexual equality as a "separate-but-equal" approach that does not reap the same results as the confrontational approach they've been using. However, the Japanese methods may be reaping more long-term rewards. In the U.S., women seem more comfortable working with their peers than alongside men, and even if they're not facing the same kind of discrimination that their mothers did, they're now facing a different, more subtle kind of discrimination. d. The Status of Children Children are considered very valuable to Japanese parents; in fact, one of the major holidays in Japan is called "Children's Day"; though this used to be exclusively a boys' holiday, it is now considered one for girls as well. The one paramount thing that is stressed to children is the importance of their education. Even the most crowded house or apartment will have plenty of study room for the children. Birth control and abortion are not as controversial in Japan as in the United States because the size of families is often dictated by how much a family can afford to educate their children more than anything else (to be fair, neither birth control or abortion is a hot-button issue; neither Shinto or Buddhism have any restrictions on either of them, and Japan has rather lax abortion laws that are not even enforced; further, there is virtually no teenage pregnancy problem). As far as discipline, corporal punishment is almost unheard of; this is not because they have anti-spanking laws like Sweden (they do not), but rather traditionally persuasion has been seen to be better than force in disciplining children. The main motive used is shame. "People won't like you if you act that way" seems to be more effective to Japanese parents than hitting the buttocks with a belt. Also, whereas American parents often ground their children, Japanese children who misbehave are often locked out of their homes (like Usagi was on the very first episode of "Sailor Moon"). Frankly, most Japanese feel that the Western method of corporal punishment is repugnant and brutal. This is not to say that corporal punishment doesn't occur at times; it was quite frequent during the militarist rule of World War II. Japanese teens are not as unruly as their American peers. Problems with drugs and alcohol are almost unknown, though teen smoking has been somewhat of a problem (Japan, not necessarily undeveloped, is one of the American tobacco companies' biggest foreign markets; this has been the case since the Japanese government eased its monopolistic control over tobacco in the 1980's). Further, the "bosozuku" or "speed tribes" of motorcycling youths are not like the Hell's Angels or Banditos in the U.S.; most are just enthusiastic about motorcycling and commit no worse crimes than breaking the speed limit. Japanese youths rebel in other ways, mainly in trying to alter their school uniforms or even dying their hair! Of course, at the universities, especially during the 1960's, there are still the occasional protests. e. Individuals vs. Groups One distinguishing hallmark of Japanese society is the stress of the group. Even in government there is a stress on group leadership; even in shogunal times the shogun often had his advisors, and Gen. Tojo was merely the hub holding the military leadership together in World War II (when things began to go badly for Japan, he meekly resigned the prime ministership). Most individual think of themselves as part of a company or of a family or of a community rather then as a single person. However, one should be careful to assign a "herd mentality" to the Japanese. There are ample opportunities for Japanese to prove their individuality. Nowhere is this more apparent than in their literature; often authors write of their own struggles against what they feel to be a "conformist" society (one Japanese author, Yasunari Kawabata, won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1968, one of his stories, "The Izu Dancer", can be seen in anime form in the series "Animated Classics of Japanese Literature" from Central Park Media).; the two well-known Japanese poetry styles--the seventeen syllable Haiku and the thirty-one syllable tanka--have also served as forums of individual expression. f. Hierarchy The Japanese concept of hierarchy is a bit different from most. Certainly, in the feudal past, there was the powerful elite at the top down to the peasant farmers at the bottom, but the combined effects of the Meiji Restoration reforms as well as World War II and thereafter have changed that; by the end of the war most wealth was eliminated, and inheritance taxes are pretty stiff (it's not unusual for a CEO of a major firm to "adopt" someone to take over the business when he retires). Most Japanese, if asked, say that they're middle class. Thus hierarchy has taken on a "vertical" rather than a "horizontal" orientation. Usually this is achieved by groups, with a clearly defined leader and followers. It should be noted, however, that leaders usually have a rather symbolic role and that actual authority or carrying out the business of a group may rest with some high-ranking junior officers or middle management. Thus a Japanese person says he's a company man rather than being in the middle class. No where is hierarchy better known to the American otaku than in education. Upperclassmen, or "sempai", have considerable authority over their "kohai" or underclassmen, though the type of bullying seen in such anime as "Oh! My Goddess" or "Here is Greenwood" is quite rare (there has been a bullying problem in the Japanese educational system, but much of that is do to students acting differently than others; the Japanese are now only beginning to address this problem). This is different from the American situation, where it seems we've all heard stories of how the dumb jocks pick on the smart nerds and treat them like outcasts a/la/our heroine, Daria Morgendorffer. ************************************************************************************* This is more or less a basic description of Japan in general. As stated, I highly encourage everyone out there to read Mr. Reischauer and Dr Levi's books that I have mentioned. And now for. . . PART 2: THE IN-JOKES! ************************************************************************************* As stated, the in-jokes are described by the data or chapter they're in. The use of "data" instead of chapters is in itself an in-joke; some anime series like "Cyber City Oedo 808" and "The Guyver" are divided up into data instead of episodes. The title of this story is in itself a pun of sorts; it's a pun on the episode "The Misery Chick" as well as "Sailor Senshi". ************************************************************************************* Author's Disclaimer "So there": If you've ever seen the movie "Airplane!", in the statement in the closing credits that states that copying the film is a Federal offense subject to criminal prosecution (yadda, yadda, yadda), after that, there are the words "So there." Next time you see that film, look very carefully for it. ************************************************************************************* Data 1: Ebon Genesis Sweet Adeline Data Title: The title of this data is a pun on the title of the anime series "Neon Genesis Evangeleon" from the legendary GAINEX studios. "A brown octopus": Often in American World War II propaganda, the military government of Japan was depicted as a greedy octopus trying to grab all of Asia with its tentacles; there was one good cartoon where the American eagle attacks such an octopus. "Shaolin Temple": This famed temple (which does exist, by the way) does teach their monks the martial arts style of kung fu; it was mentioned in the 1970's cult classic TV series "Kung Fu" (it gets mentioned later in Data 16). "Chang Ryu": One of the most common in-jokes in anime are characters that look vaguely familiar to other anime characters (i.e. Mari the bully from "Project A-ko" looking like Kenshiro from "Fist of the North Star"). I've tried a verbal approach to this. Ryu was named in honor of Ryu from "Street Fighter". "Amazana Yoriko": Yoriko's last name is a pun on "Amazon", the fabled female warrior tribe of Greek mythology; anime has quite a few of them like Shampoo from "Ranma 1/2" and A-ko (her mother is supposed to be Wonder Woman, herself an Amazon). "New Imperial Rule Assistance Association": It wasn't until the militarists were in control that they attempted to form some political organization. In 1940, all political parties were ordered to join an organization known as the Imperial Rule Assistance Association. This organization, however, was not as cohesive or as well-organized as the Italian Fascists or the German Nazis were. "With a deft movement. . .pack up her briefcase": This is one of several references to Project A-ko I make in the story. In the first film, when we first meet A-ko, she wakes up late for school, takes off her nightshirt and races to her closet--wearing nothing but her panties--to grab a bra. "Akbar el-Salaam/Allah Akbar": "Allah Akbar" is Arabic for "Allah (God) is great", thus Akbar's name is an ironic pun. "Torymura Keiichi": I named him after Morisato Keiichi from "Oh! My Goddess" and the last name is sort of a pun on "Dragon Ball" creator Akira Toryama. "Nagai Kenji": In this case, I named the Governor of Tokyo-to after controversial anime creator Go Nagai, responsible for "Shameless School", "Mazenger Z" (known as "TranZor Z" here; it was the first of the "transforming robot" shows); "Kekko Kamen"; "Cutey Honey" ; "Violence Jack" and "Devilman". "Linda Lovelace": Of course, she was the star of the famous (or infamous, depending on your politics on the subject) pornographic film "Deep Throat". "Red miniskirt": That was my favorite scene from "The Lab Brat": Quinn showing up in her living room wearing that red miniskirt and trying to seduce Kevin. I especially like the shot where you see Kevin and you see Quinn's back and legs. It kind of reminded me of that famous scene in "The Graduate" where Dustin Hoffman's character is seeing those legs. "Ashley Judd": In the 1998 Academy Awards, Ashley, daughter of Naomi Judd and sister of Wynnona Judd (I'm not going to call her just by that first name; there's too many one-name performers as it is already!) showed up in a high-slitted dress, and everyone thought she wasn't wearing any underwear! "Larry Flint": Of course, the controversial publisher of "Hustler" magazine and the subject of the film "The People vs. Larry Flint". "Gee, Commander. . .take over Lawndale": I couldn't resist spoofing the opening of "Pinky and the Brain"; you know, where Pinky asks, "Gee, Brain, what are we going to do tonight?", and Brain responds by saying, "The same thing we do every night, Pinky: TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!" NARF! ZORT! ************************************************************************************* Data 2: Ms. Morgendorffer Goes to Tokyo Data title: OK, OK, I'll admit it: it's a pun on the Frank Capra film "Mr. Smith Goes to Washington" with Jimmy Stewart. "Since the last time. . .changed your mind": In the "R" season of Sailor Moon, Ami was accepted for her pre-med studies in Germany but changed her mind about going when the Four Sisters attacked an ice cream stand and tried to deep freeze some people; that episode aired here as "Sailor Mercury--Moving On?" (if you look very carefully when she steps out of the taxi when she arrives at the airport, the main terminal is clearly marked in both Japanese and English as New Tokyo International Airport, the official name for Narita Airport, which is in the town called Narita in Chiba-ken). "Mamoru had dumped me": Shortly after Chibi-Usa's arrival in the "R" season, Mamoru had an awful vision of The future Neo-Queen Serenity (Usagi) being attacked by the Wiseman and the Four Sisters and decided to break up with her for their safety (Usagi took it in her usual manner; she collapsed into a phone booth and cried; that has to be one of the most dramatic animated sequences ever made); that episode aired here as "The Cosmetic Caper"; they eventually got back together again (at least in the Japanese version; American audiences were left hanging after DIC pulled the plug on the show and will still be left hanging unless those 17 extra episode they made for Canada ever get brought over here). "I've got small breasts": In a recent issue of "Cracked" magazine, they did a spoof of "Daria" called "Duncia"; in the spoof Daria/Duncia moans that she's short and has small breasts (she also complained about being drawn in the "Beavis and Butt-Head" style). It's also a jab at the "R" episode called "Steal Mamoru's Kiss! Ann's Snow White Strategy" (which aired here as "Mirror, Mirror on the Wall"), where Makoto says that she deserves the role of Snow White because she has the biggest breasts of the five Sailor Senshi (DIC, bowing to stupid American censorship rules, recast the line so that Lita says that she deserves the role because she has the most talent). OK, let's admit it, Daria does seem a bit flat-chested, but they seemed to give her some bust when she done herself up as Quinn towards the end of "Quinn the Brain" and you can see some bust on her in the makeovers of her as a gymnast and as a "Baywatch" lifeguard in the closing credits (my personal favorite makeover: Daria in a 60's go-go miniskirt and go-go boots). "Hamada Ieyasu": I named him after Tokugawa Ieyasu, the shogun who inaugurated the isolationist Tokugawa feudal period of Japan. "Hi no Tori": This is Japanese for "Phoenix" or "Firebird". It's also an in-joke on Tezuka Osamu; his great manga epic was called "Hi no Tori" and spanned from the ancient past to the far future. So far, only two parts have been made into films: the live action "Phoenix", which covers the part of the story set in prehistoric Japan, and the anime "Phoenix 2772: Love's Cosmic Zone" (also known as "Space Firebird"); which is set in the very far future. It's also a pun on some of the Japanese moon legends that inspired Takeuchi-sensei's creation of "Sailor Moon"; one legend states that the White Hare of Inaba stole some immortality pills and hid out on the moon. (Tsukino Usagi means "Moon Rabbit" in Japanese; most overseas versions of the show have her called Bunny [as well as MixxZine's translation of the manga], but DIC opted to call her Serena here because its derived from Selene, the Greek goddess of the moon). "Morita Dojo": I named the dojo (or martial arts school) after Pat Morita, who played Arnold on "Happy Days" and the martial arts instructor on "The Karate Kid" films (he did narration on the historical anime film "Great Conquest: The Romance of Three Kingdoms"). "Heated dinner table/rice cooker": These are two uniquely Japanese items that almost every house or apartment have there; it's a joke on the old American political promise of "A chicken in every pot". ************************************************************************************* Data 3: Enter Sailor Misery Chick "Magami Eiko": Another "Project A-ko" reference. Unfortunately, A-ko has the same habit of waking up late for school as Usagi does; however, she does have the advantage of having superhuman speed (much to C-ko's consternation!). "Ms. S": I admit this was a carryover from the American version of "Sailor Moon". In that version, the girls' junior high school English teacher is called Patricia Haruna, and Serena calls her "Ms. H". "Duke Nukem 3D": In this videogame, Duke, the hero, has as one of his weapons a "Freezethrower", which shoots freezing water and turns any foe to ice; then you can go up to the creep and kick him to ice cubes. Daria had this in mind when she froze the crooks. "Your face, your ass, what's the difference!": Duke actually says that in the game. "Bob Schulz": This person, who lives in Fort Ann, New York, heads the All-County Taxpayers' Association. He's been known to file various frivolous lawsuits against New York State to stop various government projects because he feels that all his tax money's being funneled to New York City (which is a complete lie, by the way). Interesting Howard Stern trivia: Schulz was chosen to be the Libertarian Party candidate for Governor of New York State in 1994 after Stern dropped out because he wouldn't reveal his tax returns. In 1997, Schulz led an unsuccessful campaign to hold a constitutional convention in New York State; if he had it his way, welfare would be abolished and the Adirondack Park opened to clear-cut logging (as well as New York City and Long Island being left crippled financially so as to save Schulz's precious Upstate way of life). He also has his own radio talk show which originates from AM 590 WROW in Albany, New York; I don't know if its syndicated or not, but at least he has something else in common with Stern: both shows should be banned by the FCC for having obscene materiel in them. ************************************************************************************* Data 4: Jihad at 25,000 Feet Data title: This is a pun on the "Terror at 25,000 Feet" episode of "The Twilight Zone"; that episode had William Shatner (later to play Capt. James T. Kirk on the original "Star Trek") as a passenger who thinks he sees a gremlin wrecking the plane he's traveling on; everyone else, of course, thinks he's nuts. Yosof Islam/Cat Stevens: In 1979, Cat Stevens, whose "Morning Has Broken" was his biggest hit, retired from music when he fully converted to Islam and adopted his present name; unfortunately he took a lot of heat for taking Khomeini's side in the controversy surrounding Salman Rushdie, whose novel "The Satanic Verses" was condemned by Khomeini as being blasphemous to Islam. Recently, Islam cut a new album whose proceeds are to go to Islamic children in the former Yugoslavia who have been ravaged by the ethnic warfare there. "Asahi TV": This was the network in Japan that "Sailor Moon" originally aired on! It was also the home of "Dragon Ball"; if you look very carefully during the episodes of "Dragon Ball Z" during the big fight between the Earth Special Forces and the Sayans, the camera crew has "AHO" on the backs of their jackets; this stands for the Japanese name for "Asahi Broadcasting Corporation". ************************************************************************************* Data 5: The NIRAA Strikes! "gaijin-shojo": "gaijin" is Japanese for "foreigner", while "shojo" is Japanese for girl; thus Gen. Torymura is calling Daria a "foreign-girl". "HUD": This technical term stands of "Head-Up Display". This device is essentially a transparent computer monitor inside the cockpit which serves as a targeting mechanism for both machine guns and missiles for most jet fighters. ************************************************************************************* Data 6: Enter the Solar Warrior "Ty Cobb": There's been some controversy surrounding this song from Soundgarden, which appeared on their final album, 1996's "Down on the Upside". Some fans feel that the song is about the infamous Detroit Tigers outfielder who had a reputation for brawling (this was depicted rather well in the 1994 film "Cobb", with Tommy Lee Jones playing the title role). The band was rather loud in its insistence that the song has nothing to do with him, but I feel that it does. Besides, I keep having a recurring nightmare where Ty Cobb is chasing me with a big baseball bat while screaming "FUCK YOU! I'M GOING TO BEAT YOUR BRAINS OUT WITH MY BAT!" There might be some deep Freudian meaning to all this, but I'll leave it to you amateur psychoanalysts to figure it out. "Apocalypse Now/The End/Ride of the Valkyries": Of course, in Francis Ford Coppola's famed 1979 film, The Door's song "The End" (which, co-incidentally, is the final song on their 1967 debut album) figured prominently in the plot, as well as Richard Wagner's "Ride of the Valkyries" from his opera "Das Valkyrie" from his "Ring of the Nibelung" tetralogy, which played in the film's famous scene of a Vietnam village being hit with napalm (and Robert Duvall's character saying "God, how I love the smell of burning napalm in the morning!", which I lampoon in my first Tokyo bombing scene). I remember when PBS aired the entire "Ring" tetralogy in 1990, and my mother watched the whole damn thing; she drove me nuts with her singing all week! I was tempted to buy a T-shirt that said "I survived 'The Ring Tetralogy!'" "Cornhulio": In "Beavis and Butt-Head" (where Daria originated), whenever Beavis ate too much sugar, he pulled his shirt over his head, went spastic, shook his fists and went "AAAAAAAAA! I AM THE GREAT CORNHULIO! YOU WILL GIVE ME TEE PEE FOR MY BUNG HOLE!" It just made him more stupid than he already was. ************************************************************************************* Data 7: Black Saturday at Lawndale Data Title: This is a double pun. It's a pun on the titles of two films: the Western "Bad Day at Black Rock" and the disaster film "Black Sunday" (Which I make reference to later on). "Jesse began to strum. . .'Peace, dudes!'': Mystik Spiral's performance of the National Anthem was inspired from Jimi Hendrix's legendary performance of that song at the original Woodstock concert of 1969. Well, almost; in Hendrix's version, after "Gave proof through the night/That our flag was still there", he played "Taps". "Two-Face": Anyone who's read the Golden Age "Batman" stories can tell you that Two-Face's lucky coin is a double-obverse 1922 Peace Dollar; in the original comic book storyline, DA Harvey Dent was using that as evidence to convict a gangster; the gangster, however, splashed acid on Dent's face, scarring it up. While recovering at the hospital, Dent scratched one side of the coin up, and then used it to make major decisions when he embarked on his criminal career. "'Sailor Moon' fan subbed video sale": This is a bit of an in-joke on an in-joke. In the original Japanese version of "Sailor Moon", sometimes you can see storefronts selling merchandise for other anime, especially "Magic Knight Rayearth". One episode was even set at an amusement park where one of the attractions was a stage show where the hero looked suspiciously like one of the members of the famed "sentai" show "Go Renjaa" ("Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers" to you). "Surge Cola Stadium": This is my big "Up yours!" to the recent trend of corporations plastering their names all over sports facilities (you know, Coors Field, Pepsi Arena, Fleet Center, General Motors Place, etc.). If they ever rename Yankee Stadium "Con Ed Stadium" or Nassau County Veterans Memorial Coliseum "Northrup Grumman Arena" or even the Glens Falls Civic Center "Finch Pruyn Arena", I'm taking the next shuttle flight to Mars! "Gabrielle": C'mon, let's admit it, doesn't Quinn look very much like Xena's sidekick, played by Renee O'Connor? It has to be the hairstyle and the bare midriff. I just got hooked on both "Hercules" and "Xena" recently, and I've got a big-time crush on Gabrielle! "Chiller": When I was growing up in the suburban West End of Suffolk County on Long Island, one of the channels we got was WPIX-TV out of New York City (it's now called the WB 11). One of the regular shows it had in the 1970's was a Saturday afternoon (I think, please correct me if I'm wrong) movie show called "Chiller Theater". The show began just as I described it: the hand coming out of a pool of blood, setting out the letters that spelled the name of the show, and an eerie voice saying the name of the show as the hand went back into the pool of blood. That gave me big-time nightmares. "Leda: The Fantastic Adventure of Yohko": This is one of my all-time favorite anime. It's about a teenage schoolgirl who writes a song expressing her love for this guy, but then she winds up in a parallel universe and has to stop an invasion of our world. It's pretty well-done, though in the dubbed version everyone has British accents, and in the video I got from The Right Stuf International, the trailer that followed the film was better-looking than the actual film (it didn't seem as dated or worn out). "Daria had the sensation. . .grab a bra": Another homage to that scene from the first "Project A-ko" film, I must confess! "Now I know. . .'Kubla Kahn'": Colleridge was inspired to write his poem when he had an opium-induced dream. However, he was interrupted by an insurance salesman, lost his train of thought, and never got a chance to finish it. "Black Sunday/The Hindenburger": Both films deal with airships. "Black Sunday", which came out in 1977 was about a demented war veteran who steals a blimp and tries to fly it to the Super Bowl in Miami; he intends to kill some spectators by using a dart gun; a Middle-Eastern anti-terrorist agent vows to stop him. The film stars Bruce Dern and Robert Shaw. "The Hindenburg" (I mispronounced it because that's what Beavis and Butt-Head probably would have done; however, I do remember seeing a parody called "The Hindenburger" on a Brit-com I only saw once in my entire life; I think it was called "Grandma's Television Station" or something like that. If you remember that series, e-mail me, please!) was a 1975 film with Gig Young, George C. Scott, Anne Bancroft, Rene Auberjonis and Burgess Meredith; it was about the 1937 disaster involving the explosion of the famed German dirigible. Believe it or not, the film got roasted on an episode of the 1987 animated series, "Beverly Hills Teens", called "Miracle at the Teen Club". It was essentially a retelling of Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" with the teens in the various roles; Buck Huckster was Scrooge and Pierce Thorndyke III was Marley. Pierce said, "We are going to look back at your life to see how became a miser!" Buck said, "Bah, Hindenburg!" Pierce says back "No! We're not going to see that film!" Rumor has it that a new film version is in the works of "The Hindenburg". ************************************************************************************* Data 8: Ami Joins the Free Lawndalers "American rules football player": Since Ami is Japanese, I had to distinguish our game of football from soccer, which the rest of the world calls "football" and even from the Canadian and Australian variants of the game. That's where the Australian version bails me out. They call it "Australian rules football", so I call ours "American rules football". "Burkina Faso": One of my favorite countries with unusual names; it used to be called Upper Volta and is in Africa. The name change was made in 1984 after a military coup; in the native tongue it means "the land of the upright men". "M*A*S*H": OK, OK, it's a visual joke; I used the asterisks like they did for the classic TV series with Alan Alda and Jamie Farr. Just be lucky I didn't throw in the theme song "Suicide is Painless". "She could see Daria. . .snatched Trent from Daria": This is a satire on the scene from the "Sailor Moon" episode that aired here under the title "The Past Returns", which told how Queen Beryl destroyed the Moon Kingdom. "Kunzite": The original Japanese name is used here, he's called Malachite here in the U.S. and in the original Japanese version was homosexual (he had a thing for Zoisite, who was a guy in the Japanese version; DIC got around that by recasting Zoycite as a woman). "Who watches the watchmen?": The Latin saying can be translated like that, though "Who will guard the guards?" or "Who will keep the keepers themselves?" might be better. I chose the translation that I used because it makes reference to the DC Comics mini-series "The Watchmen", and that was used as their advertising slogan. "Somehow, there were. . .Those bastards!"; An all too obvious reference to Comedy Central's controversial animated series "South Park", where Kenny gets killed in every episode and Kyle expresses his shock over his death. ************************************************************************************* Data 9: The Neo-Zero Attacks! "Gojira": I decided to use the original Japanese name for Godzilla here. "Tokyo Tower": At over one thousand feet, Tokyo Tower, which is a TV transmitter, is one of the most familiar sights in Tokyo and is the city's (and Japan's) tallest structure. There is an observation deck about half-way up and school field trips often go there (in "Magic Knight Rayearth", Hikaru, Fuu and Umi first meet there as their respective schools were having field trips there). It's seen quite often in anime; you can see it in the background in many scenes of "Sailor Moon". "IFF device": This is short for "Identify-Friend-or-Foe" device. This device helps most jet fighters know what's a friendly craft from an enemy one. A similar device is found on radar for civilian air traffic control; it identifies what carrier and what flight the particular plane is. "Grumman F-14A Tomcats": Being from Long Island originally, and having relatives who once worked for Grumman (now known as Northrup Grumman), I'm proud to include this fine jet fighter in this story. The fighter's logo is an alleycat in a boxing ring, with the motto "Anytime, baby. . .!" below that. Grumman, which was based in Bethpage in Nassau County, also made the F6F Hellcat during World War II, which proved to be more than a match for Japan's Mitsubishi A6M Zero. The company also made the Apollo Lunar Module and the ill-fated Flixible buses the didn't fare too well in New York City (it also made the current version of the U. S. Postal Service truck). "Moonlight Knight/Furuhata Motoki": After the Dark Kingdom was destroyed, Mamoru lost all knowledge of being Tuxedo Mask (much like the Sailor Senshi lost all knowledge of who they were). However, when Ail and Ann arrived, he adopted the disguise of Moonlight Knight; only later on when he realized that the Sailor Senshi were indeed back did he revert to his old Tuxedo Mask identity, only to give that up temporarily when he dumped Usagi at the start of the Four Sisters incident, only to resume that later on in that storyline and for the other three seasons of the series. Motoki was called Andrew in the American version and was a friend of Mamoru, Usagi and the others (Usagi and Makoto once had big-time crushes on him). "The Monks": The Monks were five American ex-servicemen who were living in Germany; they were originally formed as The Five Torquays in 1961. In 1965, the line-up was more or less set, and they adopted their outfit of all-black clothing, rope neckties and tonsured heads (shaved partially bald). The band consisted of: Gary Burger (vocals, guitar); Dave Day (electric banjo); Eddie Shaw (bass); Larry Clark (organ) and Roger Johnston (drums). Their only album was released in 1966 and is called "Black Monk Time". It includes the songs "Monk Time"; "Boys are Boys and Girls are Choice"; "I Hate You"; "Complication"; "Love Came Tumblin' Down" and "Oh How to Do Now". Until 1997, the album was available only as an import item from Polydor Records; in that year, American Recording's Infinite Zero Archive label got the domestic rights to the album and reissued it; it includes seven additional tracks, including four rare A and B sides, a live track and two demos. If you can, find this album; it's pretty good and is still ahead of its time despite being released over thirty years ago. "The Hindenburg": This scene is a parody of a part of the Beavis and Butt-Head book "This Book Sucks!" Co-incidentally, if you look very carefully inside Daria's locker, she's got a picture of the disaster inside the door. "Tom Anderson": He was the old neighbor that Beavis and Butt-Head kept harassing. He, like Beavis and Butt-Head, was voiced by creator Mike Judge (co-incidentally, he sounds much like Hank Hill from Judge's "King of the Hill" series on Fox). ************************************************************************************* Data 10: The Truth About Amazana Yoriko Data Title: This is a parody of "The Truth of Bashtarlle" episode of the "Giant Robo" OAV series. "Dr. Vander Helffen looked at Daria. . .story of my life": This scene is a satire of the passage from George Orwell's "1984" where O'Brien grills Winston Smith in the torture room of the Ministry of Love. Take it from me, Dr. Vander Helffen would believe that two and two equals five if that could advance his arguments. "Master Kung": The actual Chinese name of Confucius is Kung Fu-tzu; Confucius is the Latinized rendition of that name. He is always called Master Kung by East Asian persons. "Ultra Soldier": This is a parody of the "Super Soldier" formula used to create Captain America. ************************************************************************************* Data 11: The Solar Warrior's Origins "Terra": Anyone who's a die-hard Trekkie will know that Terra is the technical catalog name for Earth (like Sol is the technical catalog name for the Sun); the names are used by alien races in the Federation. "Mecha-Dominion": This is a double parody. It makes fun of two "Star Trek" adversaries: the Borg from "Next Generation" and the Dominion of "Deep Space Nine". "The needle! The needle! THE NEEDLE! THE NEEDLE!": In "Beavis and Butt-Head", whenever the subject of capital punishment was brought up, Beavis began to say "The chair! The chair! THE CHAIR! THE CHAIR!" But since in most states electrocution had been replaced by lethal injection, I decided to update Beavis's schtick. ************************************************************************************* Data 12: A Desperate Teleportation "Three sliders Scotty always used": On the original "Star Trek" series, when Scotty activated the transporter, he used three sliding control bars that started the teleportation sequence. This was retained in the movies and in the three other TV series by a series of three touch-sensitive buttons that Chief O'Brien or whoever is in charge of the transporters slid their fingers over. "How dare you interrupt . . .introductory speech": Whenever Sailor Moon and/or the Sailor Senshi arrive to kick bad guy ass, they always make an introductory speech. The best example is in the episode "Steal Mamoru's Kiss! Ann's Snow White Strategy" (aired here as "Mirror, Mirror on the Wall"), where some appropriate background scenes are rendered (my favorite, Sailor Venus against a rendition of the famed painting "The Birth of Venus"). ************************************************************************************* Data 13: Crush! Kill! Destroy!, or the Battle of Lawndale Data title: I was inspired for the title of this data from the "Revolt of the Androids" episode of "Lost in Space" where the Robinsons and Dr. Smith face a killer robot named IDAK; he kept saying "Crush! Kill! Destroy!" ************************************************************************************* Data 14: Corlew's Last Stand Data title: This is a pun on "Custer's Last Stand". "Lorena Bobbitt/John Wayne Bobbitt": In the famed 1993 incident, Mr. Bobbitt had his penis cut off by his wife. "St. Eligius": He's the patron saint of metalworkers; his name is also on the Boston hospital that served as the locale for the TV series "St. Elsewhere". "The force of the kick. . .Uncle Phil went the same way!": This is a satire on the climatic scene of the film "The Naked Gun: From the Files of 'Police Squad!'" In that film, Lt. Drebin had just thwarted Ludwig's plot to kill Queen Elizabeth II by using a brainwashed Reggie Jackson and had pursued him to the top of Dodger Stadium. Drebin fired one of his cuff-link bullets, and Ludwig fell to the parking lot, where he was ran over by a bus, a steam roller, and the USC Trojan Marching Band playing The Kingsmen's "Louie, Louie". Drebin's boss goes, "Oh, Frank! It's so horrible! Horrible!" Drebin says, "I know, Ed". The captain then says "My father went the same way!" In essence, it's a double pun; The USC Trojan Marching Band played the brass section part of Fleetwood's 1979 hit "Tusk" (the name of the song was derived for drummer Mick Fleetwood's nickname for an erect penis) in the original studio version and later reprised that part when the song was played on the reunion special "The Dance" on VH1. ************************************************************************************* Data 15: Sailor Misery Chick Takes to the Skies "Wouldn't that be like using a pea shooter against an ICBM?": I have Michael J. Pfeffer to thank for this one. This line can also be seen in Gordon Korman's novel "Son of Interflux". "Sailor Moon parked right on top of her": Another "Project A-ko" pun. When A-ko and B-ko fly up to Captain Napopolita's ship to save C-ko, a missile blast separates them, and A-ko falls on top of a jet fighter; the only thing the pilot can see is her buttocks. ************************************************************************************* Data 16: Tokyo Game, Set and Match Data title: There is a famed spy novel trilogy from Len Deighton called "Game, Set and Match". The first part is "Berlin Game"; the second is "Mexico Set"; the third is "London Match". "Tiger and dragon tattoos": In the original "Kung Fu" series, the original Caine got the marks of the Shaolin priesthood by putting his bare arms on a hot brazier where indented marks in the shape of a tiger and a dragon seared into his flesh; the resulting scars indicated his status as a priest. However, if you look closely at the modern-day Caine on "Kung Fu: The Legend Continues", he's got tattoos instead of burn marks. "Kwai Chang Caine": Of course I mean the modern-day Caine from "Kung Fu: The Legend Continues" and not the original Caine from the original "Kung Fu" series. "Oni": Oni in Japanese folklore and ogres who are gigantic, have wildly-colored hair, horns, sharp teeth, wear tiger skins, possess superhuman strength, can fly and usually eat humans and rape women. The most famous oni in anime include Lum from "Urusei Yatsura" and the Ogre Slayer. "Murakumo-no-Tsurugi": This sword was used by Susano the Wind God to kill an eight-headed dragon who was about to eat a young girl. He later gave the sword to Amaterasu-Omikami as an apology for making her angry during an early incident (those two had a severe case of sibling rivalry). This legend is alluded to in the beginning of the anime TV series "Blue Seed" in explaining the origins of the shape-shifting alien monsters called the Aragami. "A few days later. . .'BANZAI!' five times;" This scene was loosely modeled after the final scene of the first "Star Wars" film, where Luke Skywalker, Chewbacca and Han Solo receive medals from Princess Leia. To be fair, George Lucas was inspired from a scene from a Nazi propaganda film called "Triumph of the Spirit" when he made this scene. It's quite a common occurrence for one movie scene to inspire another; the shoot-out scene in Chicago's Union Station from "The Untouchables" film with Kevin Costner and Robert Di Niro was modeled after a similar scene from the film "Battleship Potemkin". "Charles Xavier": He's the wheelchair-bound leader of the mutant superhero team the X-Men; his code name is "Professor X". His mutant ability is that he's a pretty strong telepath. ************************************************************************************* And that does it for this appendix. Before I wrap this up, let me just thank a few people: God Almighty (I wouldn't be alive without Him right now); My parents, Diane McNeill and Walter McNeill (they have to put up with my eccentricities); Katherine Goodman, Webmaster, Alt-Lawndale.com (thanks for letting me post this on your site); My late and dear friend, Kristin Graziani, who was very much like Daria herself when we were in high school, and for whom this appendix is dedicated to; I hope you're playing a mean harp up there, Mother Hen; Michael J. Pfeffer, for the tip-off about the "Pea shooters and ICBM's" line; Naoko Takeuchi, creator of "Sailor Moon", for my inspiration for this rather twisted fanfic; Glenn Eichler, creator of "Daria" (never let it be said that nothing good came out of "Beavis and Butt-Head"); Tom Clancy (let's see Jack Ryan top this one!); Martin Luther (a mighty man who built a fortress out of a rock); International Masters Publishers (I got my money's worth already from "Aircraft of the World"); Terri Hawkes (the North American voice of Sailor Moon); Karen Bernstein (the North American voice of Sailor Mercury and sometime executive producer for PBS's "American Masters" documentary series); Tracy Grandstaff (the one and only voice of Daria); Renee O'Connor (Gabrielle from "Xena: Warrior Princess"; man, do I love that bare midriff of hers!); Mamoru Oshii (director, "Patlabor", "Ghost in the Shell", "Urusei Yatsura"; I should have thrown in a basset hound in here somewhere); The Monks ("Boys are boys and girls are choice"); Wendy Hoopes (the voice of Quinn, Helen and Jane; "Kevin, how do you like my skirt?"); Teryl Rothery (the voice of A-ko from "Plot of the Daitokuji Financial Group" onward; ask me to e-mail a letter I got from her!); and To everyone like me who was an outcast at high school for some reason or another and had to put up with the abuses of our own Sandies, Kevins, Brittanies, etc.; someday, I can only hope, the world will judge us not by how we look or what problems we have but by the content of our character and the pureness of our soul. ************************************************************************************* "Well, the one thing we did right/Was the day we started to fight!/Keep your eyes on the prize, O Lord!" --Theme from the PBS documentary series "Eyes on the Prize" ************************************************************************************* "Terminat hour diem, terminat author opus" ("The hour ends the day; the author finished his work.") --From "Doctor Faustus" by Christopher Marlowe. FINIS -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Peter Guerin is the author of "The Misery Senshi Neo-Zero Double Blitzkrieg Debacle" (a crossover between "Daria" and "Sailor Moon"); "Triumph of the Retart" and "One Man's Trash. . ." (his "Daria" crossover with the 70's sitcom "Sanford and Son"). Besides being a fan of "Daria" and "Sailor Moon", Peter is also a big fan of other anime such as "Project A-ko", "Gunsmith Cats", "You're Under Arrest!", "Samurai Pizza Cats", and "Here is Greenwood". He also likes other American animated efforts like "Spider-Man"; "X-Men"; "Silver Surfer"; "South Park"; "Tiny Toon Adventures"; "Animaniacs"; "Pinky and the Brain"; and the old Loony Tunes cartoons. Born in 1968 in Bay Shore, New York, Peter graduated from Connetquot High School in Bohemia, New York, in 1987 and received his Associate's Degree in Business Administration from Adirondack Community College in Queensbury, New York, in 1994. He currently lives in Hudson Falls, New York with his mother, stepfather and elder stepbrother. Besides his interest in anime, Peter also likes such live-action TV programs as "Monty Python's Flying Circus" (he especially likes the episodes with "The Bishop" and "Njorl's Saga" sketches in them [remember to invest in Malden!]); all four "Star Trek" TV shows (though he wonders to this day why they'd chose Mrs. Columbo to command "Voyager"); "Sanford and Son"; "Hogan's Heroes"; "The Flip Wilson Show"; "Hercules: The Legendary Journeys" and "Xena: Warrior Princess" (he admits he's got a thing for Gabrielle and her bare midriff of hers!). He also likes the film "Colossus: The Forbin Project," from whence he got one of his e-mail handles. Peter also like some music, especially Garbage (he's got a thing for Shirley Manson and her miniskirt and go-go boot get-ups); The Monks ("It's Beat Time! It's Hop Time! IT'S MONK TIME NOW!"); Fleetwood Mac ("Tusk!"); Rage Against the Machine ("Rally 'round tha family with a pocket full of shells!"); Splendora ("You're standing on my neck!") and REM ("What's the frequency, Kenneth?"). By the way, PLEASE NEVER, NEVER, under any circumstances, play Italian music around him; it depresses him to no end! Peter himself suffers from Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), the same affliction that David MacAllister suffers from in "Triumph of the 'Retart'"; in fact, the story is semi-autobiographical; Peter himself ran for Student Government President in his junior year and lost by sixteen votes, the closest such election in the school's history. As for his future plans for fanfic, Peter has an idea for a Daria/Hercules/Xena crossover as well as a story that is going to be a mega-crossover (we're talking "Marvel Secret Wars" big here!) that essentially will be a spoof of Albany, New York's Tulip Fest and Hudson Falls' Sandy Hill Days involving "Daria", "Heathcliff," "Beverly Hills Teens" (Bianca Dupree is more sinister than J. R. Ewing and Alexis Carrington-Colby combined, at least in his opinion), "Cats and Company" and "Inspector Gadget", as well as a Daria/Bishop crossover. Among the other weird crossovers he has in mind also include one that would feature Penelope Pitstop, Dick Dastardly, Muttley, Klunk, Zilly, Yankee Doodle Pigeon, the Hooded Claw and the Ant Hill Mob from the Hanna-Barberra "Wacky Races/Dastardly and Muttley in their Flying Machines/Perils of Penelope Pitstop" saga as well as Speed Racer; the tentative title is going to be "Lawndale Death Race 500". He also plans to do some involving "Hogan's Heroes" (it won't be a lame-o time travel thing; it'll be set in the present, and you will see some changes in Hogan, Klink and the others) as well as one involving "Project A-ko" and "Colossus: The Forbin Project". Peter can be reached at either DocForbin@Hotmail.com.; DickMarino@Yahoo.com; PeterThree@MailExcite.com or Harmacy@MailCity.com. Please e-mail him. That would make him very happy. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i don't know

What entertainment mega-corp recently announced they were acquiring Marvel Entertainment, home of Spiderman and the Incredible Hulk, among others, to the tune of $4 billion?

StocksInTheFuture.org Stocks In The Future - Home   Ford Sees Green! Summer is the time to get out and explore. How fitting that one of Ford Motor Company’s top sellers is named “The Explorer”.   Ford Motor Company has reported a gain of 13% domestic sales revenue increase over last year’s totals as of May 2012! Many new families will be out exploring in new Fords this summer. Not only is Ford Motor Company showing leadership in reducing the greenhouse gas emissions of its vehicles, but the company is also being recognized by the Environment Protection Agency (E.P.A.) for its greenhouse gas leadership in manufacturing. Ford is bursting through the fuel efficiency market with electric vehicle options and battery innovations. Ford is working hard to reestablish its role as an automotive power house.  Summer sales along with the unveiling of 2013 models will be sure to make Ford (F) a stock option to watch.    June 2012 This summer, Disney will release two films: Brave and The Odd Life of Timothy Green. Brave will be released near the beginning of summer, on June 22nd. Mid-August, Disney will release The Odd Life of Timothy Green. Brave, an animated film produced by Pixar, tells the story of a Scottish princess, Merida, whose actions inadvertently lead to a curse being placed on her parents’ kingdom. As she attempts to lift the curse, she learns the true meaning of bravery.  This is Pixar’s first film with a female protagonist and Merida is the first Pixar character to be included in Disney’s princess line.  The Odd Life of Timothy Green, based on a story written by Ahmet Zappa, follows a young boy who suddenly appears in the lives of a childless couple. However, this is no ordinary boy, as his parents soon discover. The Motion Picture Association of America has given both of these films ratings of PG, or parental guidance recommended, making them ideal for families to see during summer break.   If these films perform well, the boost in revenue due to ticket sales may cause an increase in Disney’s share price. Conversely, if ticket sales are less than the cost of production,   Disney’s shares may lose value.   May 2012 With the recent addition of Ford Motor Company to offered SIF stocks, current news will begin to include the automobile industry. Beginning in 2008 the automobile industry began to fail. We saw major losses during the recession and both GM and Chrysler declared bankruptcy. Currently, it looks as though the industry, including Ford Motors, has recovered and is looking forward to robust growth. “Autos have had their strongest performance this year since early 2008, with purchases exceeding a 14 million annual rate in each month of 2012 so far.” This growth is also revving up the entire economy. According to government data, half of the growth in the entire US economy during the first quarter of 2012 can be attributed to the automotive industry. While the industry wide decline hurt Ford Motors, it did not force them into bankruptcy like many of its competitors.  This bodes well for Ford, demonstrating that it may be in a good place to withstand future hard times. With the economy recovering, and automotive companies leading the way, now might be a great time to invest in Ford Motors!   April 2012 Have you ever tried Coconut water? Coca-Cola thinks you should. Last week, Coca-Cola Bottling Company announced it had acquired a majority share of Zico, making it the primary owner. Zico is the second largest international brand in the coconut water business, an estimated $350 million industry. Some investors think this is a fantastic purchase for Coca-Cola. The Coconut water industry has seen vast growth over the past few years and is currently being marketed as an alternative and healthier sports drink. John Craven, founder and CEO of BevNet, a beverage publisher, says “roughly 3 in 10 new beverages coming to market today have coconut water as a component.”  Other Investors though have mixed thoughts about this new endeavor.  Pepsi Co., a leading competitor of Coca-Cola has already entered the coconut water industry. After introducing the ingredient into several products, Pepsi decided to pull the plug and backed away from coconut water because it apparently lacked profitability. Some skeptic Investors are wary Coco-Cola may be heading toward a similar fate. With such a risky project being undertaken, Coca-Cola stock looks to be making major moves either up or down over the next few years. April 2012   Sirius XM Radio may be approaching the worst times it has faced since its Initial Public Offering. In 2000 Sirius XM reached its peak in value at over 60 dollars per share. A rapid decline over the next two years brought the value down into single digits. Since this time Sirius XM has remained at this low value, today trading at roughly 2.5 dollars per share. Recent news has suggested that Sirius XM may be expecting a hostile takeover by Liberty Media. After lending Sirius XM 530 million dollars to keep from going bankrupt, Liberty Media was offered a 40% share in Sirius XM. With stock prices continuing to stagnate and Liberty Media fearing they will not get their money back, they are considering taking over Sirius XM. The price of the company and limited future prospects may keep Liberty Media from this course of action. Sirius XM is in the business of selling satellite radio hardware and subscriptions. Although subscriptions have increased from 20.2 million last year to 21.9 million this year, the market for this service is dwindling. Online competitors such as Spotify and Pandora Radio offer similar services without the expensive subscriptions. This news has investors in Sirius XM stock cautious and worried. April 2012   Sony seems to be falling behind the curve on new handheld electronic devices. Recently, Sony Corporation released and began selling the Sony Tablet P. This portable tablet was supposed to carve a new niche in the market while also competing with some leading of the tablets such as Apple’s new iPad. Unfortunately for Sony though, the response to the tablet has been less than positive. Even with lawsuits and other negative media generated toward Apple, the new iPad is still outselling the new Sony Tablet P. This new product is also failing to control a new portion of the market. With its foldable design, the Sony Tablet P was supposed to attract a new audience and offer new features. This has not happened; Consumers are instead finding few advantages for the device and are choosing to purchase other products. This trend is a continuation of a poor showing from Sony Corporation at the Mobil World Conference at the end of February in Barcelona, Spain. At the conference Sony had planned to release its newest 2012 gadgets but failed to impress media representatives, allowing its competitors to steal the show. Since the conference, Sony Corporation Stock has fallen by over 6%. March 2012   Netflix may see a major shift in its business and its product over the next year. According to research from HIS analysts, online movie viewing will soon overtake DVD sales in the United States.  “We are looking at the beginning of the end of the age of movies on physical media like DVD and Blu-ray,” analyst Dan Cryan stated. Recent data suggest that online viewing will more than double from 1.4 billion in 2011 to 3.4 billion in 2012. Coupled with the decline in DVD and Blu-Ray viewings, hard copies of movies are becoming obsolete. While this news is significant on its own, it is also certainly expected to impact Netflix in multiple ways. The company was originally created on the idea of distributing DVDs to customers through the mail. It has since expanded to be the largest online subscription plan to unlimited streaming of movies and tv shows. With less individuals watching DVDs, a portion of Netflix’s business with be hurt; however, with more people watching movies online, Netflix should see a rise in sales. Since Netflix is such a dominate force in online streaming they are expecting to benefit from this change. What do you think? Will growing online movie viewers and shrinking DVD sales help of hurt Netflix in the coming years?  March 2012 Walt Disney finished the month of February having gained 7.9% in its stock price. This trend was a continuation of high returns since the start of 2012. Many analysts are stating that an improving economy will lead to potential future growth for the entertainment giant. As the economy continues to stabilize and improve many investors feel Disney will benefit from increased sales at theme parks as well as on content sales such as movies and toys. Another big break for Disney could come with media offerings. Disney products appeal to all ages. Alternative content-delivery companies like Hulu and Netflix know this very well and will be fighting for the rights to air Disney content. This should give Disney the upper hand in negotiations and allow them to receive top dollar for their products going forward. Febuary 2012 Late last week Coca-Cola Company surprised its investors by releasing its full 2011 report. The information shows extremely positive gains throughout Coca-Cola’s business. While growth domestically has been fairly modest, internationally Coca-Cola is exploding showing overall gains of 10% compared to last year. Coca-Cola’s great international gains are mostly coming from Asia. In Thailand alone, sales of Coca-Cola products grew by 33%. This trend was followed by similar growth in Indiana of 15% and in China of 13%. With these areas already consuming large quantities, increasing sales by this much is enormous. This growth appears to show that Coca-Cola is not being affected very much by the global slump in the economy. Although Coca-Cola seems to be a great investment right now, there is room to be cautious. The growing issues with the European economy and high exchange rates between the American Dollar and foreign currencies my slow future sales. Two larger reasons for concern are the health consciousness of consumers and the lack of diversification by Coca-Cola. With many consumers become more conscious of their health, the amount of soda being consumed may decrease. Furthermore, unlike its competitor Pepsi Company which also sells snack foods and orange juice, Coca-Cola only sells soda. Amazing growth over the last year and concerns about continued growth means Coca-Cola Company’s stock price may go in any direction. February 2012 In 2010, pet products and supplies amounted for a $35 billion market and it is rapidly growing. According to a recently published CNBC article, “62 percent of all U.S. households own a pet, which is equivalent to roughly 71 million homes.” PetSmart, the United States’ largest retailer of pet food and supplies accounts for approximately 15% of the industry. PetSmart prides itself because it supplies healthy, all natural pet foods and a large portion of exclusive products. Only 10% of PetSmart products are available elsewhere. Recently, they have expanded their services, now supplying grooming and boarding services for dogs. In the coming years PetSmart expects to open 450 locations in North America. With such steady growth and plans for a large expansion, PetSmart stock prices are on the rise!   February 2012 As the domestic automobile industry begins to recover, Sirius XM Radio may see their profits rise in 2012. A large percentage of Sirius XM subscribers choose to listen to content while driving. Sirius XM has made deals with several automobile manufacturers such as Ford and GNC, where they offer free trail subscriptions to new owners. When the free trial expires, a portion of the car owners decide to continue using Sirius XM. With the number of cars sold in the United States growing, and with this trend expected to continue, it makes sense that Sirius XM would see an increase in sales. Sirius XM stock prices have exceeded expectations and risen over the past year. Will this trend continue in 2012? February 2012 With the economy slumping, many American’s are cutting back on their consumption of weight loss products. This was demonstrated by low growth levels throughout the health industry over the past 4 years, but this may change. Weight Watchers, an industry competitor of NutriSystem, had decided to target a new audience. Weight Watcher is now expanding their advertising to target both men and countries such as China. According to CEO David Kirchhoff, 90% of the company’s clientele used to be women. After seeing its sales fall by 22% last year, NutriSystem may begin to worry. Can NutriSystem recover from a disappointing 2011? Will they be able to target a larger market like their competitors? January 2012 The Food and Drug Association (FDA) has recently found a fungicide in Brazilian oranges that is known to cause cancer. The FDA is considering recalls on certain oranges, pending further investigation. Companies like Coca-Cola, which own Minute Maid, face the possibility that if this recall happens, demand for their orange juice products will plummet. A similar thing happened during the mad cow hysteria in 2003, and McDonald's and Wendy's were greatly affected, having their prices drop by 6%. It took half a year before these prices were able to get back to their previous highs. Experts don't think that this orange problem will grow as large as mad cow was. But if Coca-Cola begins to face higher prices for their oranges, they could be forced to sell their products for a higher price. This could lead to even less demand for these goods, as consumers could easily turn to other drinks. How big of a problem do you think this is going to become for Coca-Cola, and how much do you think its stock price will be affected, if at all? January 2012 Netflix proclaimed a month ago that it sees HBO as its chief rival, and it appears that HBO agrees, as the company confirmed on Thursday that it had decided to stop selling DVDs to Netflix at a discount. Netflix typically buys film and TV show DVDs that it rents to customers through wholesale venues, thereby taking advantage of volume discounts. But from now on, Netflix will have to buy DVD sets of shows like "True Blood" and "Boardwalk Empire" at retail in order to rent them to customers. It's not a huge financial hit to Netflix, but it is a signal about what the competitive landscape looks like. Asked about the change, a Netflix spokesman said, "Netflix will continue to provide HBO titles on DVD and Blu-ray to our members." The change was believed to have taken effect on Jan. 1. January 2012 In a deal that represents billions of dollars in revenue for the Walt Disney Company, the entertainment giant and Comcast said Wednesday that they had reached a decade-long distribution agreement covering all of Disney’s television content, including streaming for iPads and other devices. The unusually long-term agreement provides a window into the future of television viewing and how its content will be consumed. Comcast, the nation’s largest cable provider, will gain the rights to provide the Disney Channel, ESPN, Disney XD, ABC Family and the ABC broadcast network, among other Disney-owned services, to subscribers wherever they want to watch. “This is a landmark deal for us,” Neil Smit, president and chief executive of Comcast’s cable division said in an interview. “It’s the first time customers can watch ESPN, ABC and Disney across multiple platforms both in and outside the home.” November 2011 Petsmart's third quarter ended in October with more great numbers. Profit jumped 32%, raising the stock price to $.50 per share. Their Earnings per Share (EPS) also grew by 30% for the third straight quarter. In its 1,210 stores across North America and Puerto Rico, sales rose 8% to $1.5 billion. Petsmart CFO Chip Molloy expects profit to be up 10-16% from last year in the fourth quarter. On November 9th, Petsmart launched its new online store, Petsmart Boutique. Items on the website feature special new items, including ones that can't be found in store. Is now the time to sell Petsmart stock at its high, or do you think their increasing success will continue? November 2011 Have you ever had a free sample? Did you know that Sirius has incorporated the idea of a 'free sample' into their business model? Sirius works with the car companies to gives free trials of their satellite radio service to people who buy new cars. Then, Sirius hopes that when the trial period runs out, the people will decide to subscribe to Sirius satellite radio. Right now, not enough people are deciding to do buy Sirius for themselves. Sirius's satellites are getting older (which may mean they will no longer be able to guarantee crystal clear service). Additionally, other companies like Pandora and Spotify (internet radio companies) may be a cheap, alternative way for people to listen to radio in their cars in the future.  Sirius's response is to now try to give trial satellite radio service to people who buy used cars, essentially giving away more 'free samples'. The way the economy is going, there has been an increase in used car purchases. Do you think Sirius will be able to pull in enough new customers? November 2011 Rumor has it that Timewarner is looking to buy Endemol NV, the Dutch TV producer of shows like “Big Brother,” “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition,” and "Deal or No Deal.” Have you ever watched these shows? Timewarner has offered to pay 1 billion euros, which is even more money in dollars (about $1.4 billion)! Endemol is looking to restructure their amount of debt, because they have already needed to extend their loan period with their lenders, which suggests trouble for Endemol. This is another option for them to consider, now. Timewarner didn’t give Endemol a deadline for a response, so the owners of Endemol will take their time to make the right decision for their company. What do you think will happen? Would you take Timewarner’s deal? October 2011 Following their rerelease success of The Lion King in 3D, Disney has announced that four more of its classics will also be rereleased in 3D. Beauty and the Beast will appear in theatres for a limited time in mid-January. Finding Nemo, which was the highest-grossing animated movie of all time before Toy Story 3 came out last year, will hit screens this summer. Next will be Little Mermaind and Monsters, both set to come out in 2013. Historically, movie rereleases have not been successful, even for hugely popular movies like Star Wars. But in the past two weeks, The Lion King was able to generate $80 million, beating out all other movies at the box office, leading to Disney's decision to reach into their archives for more great children's classics to turn into 3D. Do you think Disney's success with 3D rerelease will continue, and if so, how great of an impact can they have on the stock of business giant like Disney? October 2011 Have you ever seen a Coca-Cola commercial? Then you've seen Coca-Cola's marketing work in action. Everyone can remember famous Coca-Cola commercials and slogans from years past. Yet according to the European Brand Institute, Apple is now beating Coca-Cola in "brand value" which tells how powerful a company's label and name are. The study looked at the 3,000 companies from 24 countries! This is the first time the institute has looked at companies on a global scale. It isn't just Apple and Coca-Cola - the top 10 companies were all from the U.S. Will Coca-Cola take its place back at the top? October 2011 Sony Corp is trying to compete with Apple’s iTunes in the online music and movie industry.  Sony announced that it will continue to bid on a big British music company called EMI.  Sony has about 28% of the album market in the U.S. and hopes that buying EMI can help it compete with iTunes.  To buy EMI, Sony would spend about 3 billion dollars.  Other companies also want to buy EMI and might bid a higher amount to buy it.  Sony’s music division has made 20% of its profits this year, so expanding this department makes a lot of sense for them.  Do you think a takeover of EMI by Sony will help its stock a lot, a little, or not at all? Will Sony ever be able to compete with Apple’s music giant, iTunes? September 2011 Sirius Satellite Radio has announced that on 1/1/12 they are raising subscription prices from $12.95 to $14.49 a month.  This small $1.54 a month increase will generate millions of dollars for Sirius in the long run, but the short term effects of this price spike is important to look at.  Current Sirius customers have can lock in their current $12.95 rate for awhile, but they won’t be able to cancel their subsciption for 2 or 3 years.  People who don't have Sirius Radio can also get the lower $12.95 price if they get the service before 2012 starts.  The full effects of Sirius’ price increase may not effect anything for awhile because most of their customers can continue to pay the lower price for as long as 3 more years.  How long do you think it will take for Sirius stock to start showing profits, and how long are you willing to wait? September 2011 Instant TV and movie provider Netflix has announced that it expects to lose almost a million subscribers in the upcoming months, giving it a total of 24 millions viewers, down from the previous 25. Subscription losses are expected as a result of Netflix CEO Reed Hasting’s announcement of raised monthly prices. Customer losses are expected to continue into 2012, as no signs indicate otherwise. Since Hasting’s announcement, Netflix’s stock has dropped nearly 40%. They continue to face stiff competition from companies such as Redbox and Blockbuster, who are currently offering a free trial deal in order to try and win over former Netflix customers who aren’t willing to pay the new prices. Do you think Netflix can bounce back from these losses, and if so, how long will we have to wait? September 2011 As of this month, Netflix is raising their monthly fees for unlimited streaming and unlimited DVDS from $9.99 per month to $15.98/ month. They are adding two plans; one that offers unlimited and streaming with no DVDs for $7.99/month and another that offers unlimited DVDs (1 at a time) and no streaming for $7.99/month. People currently on the Unlimited Streaming/DVD plan need to pick a different plan before their billing date or they will be charged $15.98/month from here on out. As a result, some customers may stop subscribing to Netflix in protest; even to the point of switching over to other services. According to the Netflix CEO, Redd Hastings, the main competitors to Netflix are internet streaming options as offered by HBO and Comcast, and not Redbox like many would expect. How do you think the change in monthly fees will affect the worth of Netflix stock? August 2011 This month, Sony is cutting the price of the Playstation 3 (PS3) by $50; the base model now costs $250 and the same system with twice as much hard drive space now costs $300. The last price cut was in 2009 when they released a slimmer model. The Playstation 3, turns five this November, which is old for gaming consoles; the main competitors, the Microsoft 360 the Nintendo Wii, are six and turning five, respectively. Video game consoles are generally released every four to six years, so the Playstation 3 is now a senior citizen, as far as consoles are concerned; however, the addition of the Playstation Move in 2009 may help keep the PS3 alive for longer. Sony is also releasing a new handheld console, the Playstation Vita, sometime before the holiday season this year. How do you think lowering the cost of the PS3 and the release of the Vita will affect Sonys stocks? May 2011 Sirius XM Radio stock hits $2.42 for second time in 3 weeks, a level not seen since July 2008. On May 13th this was reported on a CNBC newscast. It was also noted that Sirius stock is directly related to the automotive business. This is because most of Sirius income is made when people buy new cars and they can purchase the radio service at the same time. When a certain stock is linked to another industry, its important to pay attention to both. Over the years, the price change in Sirius stock seems to go along with the recovery of the automotive industry. A lot of people think thats not just a coincidence. Right now, shares of Sirius are inexpensive when compared to its potential and the growth that may be coming from the auto industry. But, as Jim Cramer of the CNBC show Fast Money likes to say, Do your own homework! August 2011 Back in June, PetSmart (PETM) announced that they were raising their quarterly dividend by 12% to 14 cents per share. Just like banks give their patrons interest for using their services, companies regularly give their shareholders dividends, or a small amount of the companys profit. This increase in revenue was available to PetSmart shareholders on August 12th if they held shares prior to July 29th. PetSmart announced a new partnership with ToysRUs that is giving rise to a whole new brand of toys that will be released in Spring 2012 for pet parents since PetSmart vice president of merchandising, Matt McAdam has noted the strong bond between pet-owners and their pets. Both PetSmart and ToysRUs are at the top of their franchise. How do you think this partnership will affect the price of PETM stock? Do you foresee any new dividend raises in the near future? August 2011 On the ninth, the nationwide system of banking in the United States, or Fed, made an announcement the short-term interest rates were going to remain low until 2013. Interest is the amount of extra money needed to pay back a bank or other lender over the initial amount borrowed. Low interest rates can be a way of trying to boost the economy since it means that people that borrow money dont pay back as much as they previously did. The NASDAQ Composite index (COMP) fell by 5 points, or 0.2%, on the same day. A composite index is a weighted grouping of individual stocks indices. Investors generally try to have a portfolio index above the composite index of the market. This falling change is not something new for traders and investors: in the last week of July and the first week of August, U.S. stocks fell 15%. Are you surprised that the stock market fell because of low interest rates? Do you think most investors only read the Business section of the paper? August 2011 Time Warner, Inc. (TMX) posted its second quarter earnings (earnings from April 1st-June 30th), which showed the fastest growth of revenue the company has seen in almost four years. Just like the school year is divided into quarters, so is the fiscal or financial year. The net income of TMX reached $638 million accounted for by a growth of 59 cents per share. This is up 14% from the second quarter of 2010. Time Warner, Inc.s adjusted operating income rose by 6% to $1.3 billion, or 60 cents per share, which is four cents higher than expected. The operating income of a company is their net profit, or how much they make when the costs of running the company are subtracted. The adjusted operating income is a number commonly used to compare media companies such as TMX since it is the operating income with sources of income that are hard to compare, like real estate, because their worth fluctuates rapidly. Sales rose 10% to $7 billion, which also topped the expected $6.8 million. This is the fasted growth rate since the third quarter of 2007. The growth rate increase was due to some big television and home entertainment releases that offset some of the production, or running costs. Since most people have already bought the newest releases, how do you think this will affect the companys finances for the third quarter (July 1st-September 30th)? July 2011 On July 31st, Coca-Cola Company will be raising their prices between 3% and 4% on drinks. This is to combat the rising prices of supplies, like corn oil, and packaging. Coke contemplated not raising prices until after Labor Day since it would make their competitors less likely to raise prices during the summer selling season, but they decided against it. Pepsi is also going to raise their prices, but is waiting until Labor Day to charge 3-5 percent more for their products. Coke is currently selling at $69.45 per share and has gone down from $69.73/share since yesterday. This is still close to the 52-week high of 69.82. July 2011 Sirius Satellite Radio has expanded very rapidly, but it now has some stiff competitors in the radio market. Pandora, a free, online internet radio, was limited to computers two years ago, but now that the iHeartRadio application is available on smartphones, Sirius needs to seriously consider some other options of expansion. Pandora has even made a deal with car manufacturers to have their application integrated into dashboards. Another competitor for Sirius is Spotify, an application that can play music from computers and smartphones and only made its debut into the U.S. mid-July. On July 15th, in spite of all the close competitors, Sirius was added to the NASDAQ-100 Index, which is a list of the top 100, non-financial stocks. Do you think the close competition will stunt Sirius growth? July 2011 Netflix announced on July 12th that they will be raising the monthly prices for online streaming plus one DVD in the mail from $10 to $16. The price of just online streaming will be $8 per month. Many customers are complaining about the price-raise and may cause many to drop their subscriptions to Netflix in lieu of other options. In the U.S. alone, Netflix currently has over 20 million customers, which will only grow over time. For old customers, the changes will go into effect in September, but new customers will get the new rates right off the bat. Back in November, the streaming service was only $8 with an additional charge of $2 a month for also getting one DVD. Many people are switching to streaming-only plans and others are cancelling their subscriptions entirely. How do you think this will affect the value of Netflix in the upcoming months? July 2011 Time Warner Cable (TWC) hit a new 52 week high of $80.86. The 52-week low for TWC is $50.41. The stocks 50-day moving average is $76.11 and the 200-day moving average is $71.5. Moving averages help show economists the trend of a stock, or which direction it has been going in, but moving averages are slightly behind the current value of the stock. A moving average is very similar to a line of best fit in that it shows the trend of a data set, but the line of best fit shows the trend for all of the data and is current. The market cap (short for market capitalization), or current value of the company, for TWC is $26.717 billion. The price-to-earnings ratio is the current value of a share divided by the earnings over the past year (EPS). So, to calculate the price-to-earnings ratio for TWC, the current share value of $80.24 is divided by the current EPS of $3.97, which gives TWC a price-to-earnings ratio of $20.21. Since stock values changes rapidly throughout the day, the price-to-earnings ratio changes with it. TWC is currently doing well, so is this a good time to buy or sell shares of TWC? June 2011 The lawsuit against Coca-Cola over the false advertising of Vitamin Water as a healthy drink is now going to mediation. Mediation in a legal setting is when both parties involved try to work out a solution without going to court. The lawsuit is based on the fact that the name of the drink, Vitamin Water, leads consumers to believe that the drink contains only water and vitamins. Vitamin Water also contains sugar, but Coca-Cola argues that the nutrition label mentions the other ingredients, such as sugar. Coca-Cola also ran into problems in the UK with similar false advertisement of its product. Think about how this publicity could affect the stock prices of Coke. June 2011   At beginning of June, Sony’s official website was attacked by a group called “Lulz Security”.  These hackers got access to people’ names, passwords, e-mails, home addresses and dates of birth. They posted other people’s personal information online for everyone to see.  Sony would not comment on how the hackers got into their website, but quickly took down the possible vulnerability. Some of the Sony customers who had all of their passwords published, this hack may have impacted their daily lives. This was the second cyber-attack on Sony since April, which mostly affected Sony’s PlayStation Network which connects gamers around the world. Sony has gotten some bad publicity because of these security issues. How do you think a company’s stock prices will fluctuate when something like this happens? June 2011 According to the CEO of Netflix, the company is now looking at expanding to a third country. Asia has four possibly profitable countries: Korea, Indonesia, Japan and India.  The company will be expanding later this year to another country, but they haven’t announced which one yet.  Netflix has been a huge success in both Canada and the United States, but this is only the beginning.  There is a global market for streaming videos, so in the future most countries will probably have Netflix available. Think about how this might affect this stock and others in the entertainment industry! May 2011 PetSmart reports 5 straight quarters of double-digit growth!The company just reported net income above Wall Streets expectations for the first quarter. Their net income rose to $70.9 million vs. $55.6 million during the same quarter in 2010. This is rise of 27.5%. Their revenue rose to $1.49 billion [G not bad! PetSmarts CEO, Bob Moran, stated that this success reflects the continued momentum and another step forward to becoming a best-in-class specialty retailer.Who are PetSmarts main competitors to watch?PetMed Express, Rite Aid, Walgreens CVS, Target and Wal-Mart April 2011 In the past, Netflix refused to entertain the idea of operating as a video seller, rather, they stuck to their initial business model as a renter. Studios though, time and again, have offered Netflix discounts on streaming rights if they are willing to operate as a seller as well as a renter. In 2008, Netflix sold its stock of used DVD's, so it's not an entirely new idea. Recently, Netflix has offered a roundabout way of selling videos - by linking to a site outside where the DVD can be purchased, even before these movies are available on Netflix (since Netflix must always wait two weeks after a DVD's release before making it available to stream). This method of video sales might be a nice compromise for Netflix to gain access to streaming content. April 2011 Did you ever think about how companies get their products displayed? One way is by using temporary store displays – they feature new items, but are easily discarded after the buzz fades. But what happens to those displays? For years companies have focused on recycling, which leaves the fate of the environment in the hands of retailers and consumers. Coca-Cola is making strides to change their approach to a closed-loop in which they take responsibility for sustainability. Coca-Cola has plans to launch entirely recyclable cardboard beverage displays, hoping to show consumers how dedicated they are to helping the environment. They truly mean to stick to their goals – Coca-Cola employees are responsible for properly recycling and even reusing components of these displays. They are taking a more active role as responsible and accountable suppliers and in doing so they are setting an example for others to follow. April 2011 Sony has released a new Playstation phone to rival the gaming features on current iPhones, Androids, and other smartphones. It has a full gaming keyboard, and while it provides for superior gaming, it ends up making the model look bulky, and the games it features don’t necessarily need this keyboard. While this phone isn’t threatening the competition as much as Sony would like, they will soon release an update to the PSP with online capabilities and a reduced price. This release is highly anticipated and may lead the way for newer model phones which eliminate the bugs and streamline the design. March 2011 Timewarner is offering free direct calls to Japan through next month. This might seem a little strange at first for a buisiness to offer something for free, but Timewarner is trying to help out in response to the earthquake and tsunami that struck Japan. In this way, they are hoping they can be of service to those affected by the natural disasters. They are paying for all calls to Japan made since tragedy struck, even those from before they instituted this policy. Digital phone customers do not have to change their accounts to take part in this offer. Timewarner is making sure to support its customers in their time of need, putting their concerns at the forefront of their agenda. March 2011 Disney has promoted a new senior VP of theatrical sales in North America, at the same time promoting another executive to the same position at the international level. These changes were made in anticipation of the retirement of their long-time president of distribution. The new executives will leave their old positions in distribution, working to bring Disney into the developmental markets of such countries as India, China, and Vietnam. These years of experience should help them take on the wider markets they now are responsible for overseeing. March 2011 Petsmart recently held their dachshund derby in Soulard to celebrate the 18th annual Beggin' Pets Parade. This was a fun way for them to raise awareness of causes that their company values. Dogs competed in categories such as 'Ballpark Franks' and 'Hot Dogs.' Registration was $10 per dog, and proceeds went to one of Petsmart's partners. This was the 17th annual derby held by Petsmart, and the event was successful for raising awareness of animal causes they support and gaining visibility. February 2011 Coke has completed a deal they begun three years ago with Honest Tea, a brand of juices and teas. They have purchased the remaining stake in the product, which they have long had the option to do. Their interest in this product is to heighten their stake in the market for soft drinks and the like. The founder of honest Tea will continue to run the business, reinvesting profit from the sale back into the company. February 2011 Nutrisystem is adding on to its line of weight-loss mobile applications. They now offer a free BMI check for Nutrisystem and non-Nutrisystem members alike. It looks like they are trying to get their name out there by providing reliable services related to their company mission. At the same time they provide up to date services geared to their customer base at the forefront of the technological frontier. February 2011 On February 3, Sony unveiled the official brand and logo for its 3D general entertainment television network in the US called 3net. Through a joint-venture with Discovery Communications and IMAX Corporation, Sony plans to launch the television network before the end of Spring this year. Some analysts speculate that the project will allow Sony to post profits slowly at first, as 3D television is not yet a widespread popular phenomenon, but many specialists are hopeful that 3net will benefit investors of Sony. January 2011 Sirius is expanding its range of broadcasting to the farthest corners of the country. Soon Alaska and Hawaii will have service to Sirius Satellite Radio through the use of repeaters. The Federal Communications Commission gave them the permission to expand their market into these areas, even though local broadcasters objected to the competition which they think would take away from their profits, reducing their ability to continue all of the local programming there. Up until now Sirius has only been available on the Internet in these regions, and Sirius feels that the consumers should have the choice of what they wish to listen to on the radio. January 2011 In a new focus on the quality of retail managers, the Coca-Cola president of Eurasia and Africa announced that Coca-Cola will partner with the Indian School of Business to start a retail academy. A six-month long retail-management program will be created to train professionals, while research opportunities will also be created, and an online school will be made available to students. Coca-cola is making sure their retail management professionals are well-rounded. Here’s one way they are looking to improve their business besides just considering the product. It’s nice to see that they are thinking of the future too, by offering training for students. January 2011 Netflix is in the process of making it easier for their customers to watch streamed videos, which has become a much more popular part of their business model than mail order DVD’s. They are working with major electronics companies in order to produce remote controls that include a ‘Netflix’ button. These should be available in the Spring, and with one-click will access a built-in program to instantly begin watching movies from the selection offered. What a way to make their name visible to both customers and potential customers! December 2010 Time Warner has not only released Disney channel on demand, but they have offered two for the price of none! They have also released the same channel and programs – in Spanish. There will be no extra charge for either of the kids’ channels for those who already subscribe. In this way they open their business up to an additional base of consumers, being more adaptable and diverse by appealing to the demand out there. This is a wise move for Disney because they serve more than 14 million customers, many of them centralized in areas with large Hispanic populations. In fact, Disney channel en español will also be offered on the Spanish speaking on demand offering. They will provide current and previous seasons of popular kid and pre-teen shows. December 2010 Netflix’s CFO left recently, starting rumors that the company was not doing well. He said that he left in order to start his own business though, and that he had been considering making a move in 2004, but didn’t want to leave back then because Netflix still needed him. Thus, as he has proven in the past, he wouldn’t leave Netflix during hard times. Instead he is happy to see the recent growth of the company, and leave it during a period of stability. He sold about 50% of his ownership of shares in the company, leaving himself with a nice sum of money, while maintaining a large stake in the future of the company. December 2010 Here’s a new way that Coca-Cola is using technology to better serve its customers. Coca-Cola will be instituting new beverage dispensers, able to hold 100 different types of products. Beverage combinations will be chosen by touch screen displays. The neat thing for the company is that they will be using Odyssey’s Athena Software, which will allow them to collect data remotely from these machines. The statistics they gather will really help them to make marketing and business decisions. They will also be able to fix problems with the machines from far away. The software will help them to increase both profit and customer satisfaction. It’s a win-win situation. December 2010 This month has started with a leap and abound, stocks are on the rise! The Dow jones Industrial Average witnessed its biggest jump in three months. It has risen almost 250 points. The major stock indexes were eased by the news that Europe’s debt might decrease, and that the tide of employment has swung for the better. As for other indexes, the Standard & Poor’s 500 indexes rose 25 points while the NASDAQ composite rose 51. Major industry groups, such as energy and technological companies led the rise. Let’s hope the remainder of the month has more good news to come! November 2010 Netflix just released a plan that involves only online video streaming. This shift to only online videos since the company began a decade ago shows how fast their consumer base has changed. More content is being watched on the internet than hard copies of DVD’s, so Netflix will spend more to license videos that can be streamed than they will spend on DVD’s. Netflix will now also raise the cost for plans that include hard copies of DVD’s. In this way, Netflix will perpetuate the changes that the market initially started. Netflix shares reached an all time high since this news was released. In two years, Netflix’s subscriber number is projected to double. For Netflix, embracing change seems to really be paying off. November 2010 Disney and Gowalla are partnering to provide Disney World guests with a new way to keep track of their memories! Scrapbooking just got a technology update and has become digital in order to enhance guests visits to Disney. Gowalla will award theme park guests with stamps depending on the attractions they visit. They can earn up to 100+, and the digital pages will provide them with a wealth of information about the attractions they are seeing. The two companies will also team up to customize particular types of park visits, for example, they could create a tour geared towards children below a certain height requirement (which might normally bar them from certain rides). The good news is that Gowalla wouldnt cost Disney customers any extra money, but should hopefully revolutionize how their park visits are organized and increase the attraction to the park overall. November 2010 Coca-Cola has turned its eyes toward its market in India. In that country, non-carbonated drinks are big sellers, so Coca-Cola India will be launching a new iced tea brand in the coming year. India as a country is a huge consumer base for Coca-Cola, so shifting to what the people there want should help increase their sales on a global scale. This will also help them to keep up with their competitors in the market. November 2010 Time Warner has expanded their services, focusing on the hospitality industry. Time Warner will now provide HD service for large-scale hotels so that guests can enjoy in-room HD cable, and hotels don’t have to worry about lots of equipment. This offer provides a way for the hospitality industry to gain a competitive edge in their industry, in a cost-effective way because they can specialize the channels they want to offer their guests. Time Warner has released this offer just before the 95th annual Hotel, Motel, and Restaurant Show, where it will present its comprehensive package to that industry. This is a good way for Time Warner to make itself visible to the public as well as the hospitality sector. October 2010 Netflix is growing at a super fast pace. It switched from being a movie rental company to an online video streaming company. This new model allows Netflix to expand outside of our country. Yet, the competitive advantage Netflix held is not so strong now. Now Netflix faces major competition from well-known online companies like Hulu or Amazon. These other companies are trying to establish themselves in the online movie market, which is an easy market to start competing in. Besides its competitors, Netflix also has to worry about purchasing the rights to online videos so they can sell them. Netflix will also have to pay more money to support their capability of selling their product to their increasing base of subscribers. Netflixs needs are changing, and what effect this will have is not yet certain. October 2010 Coca-cola’s vice president of marketing is looking toward a new approach for the marketing business. Since the economy is tight, not as many businesses have had extensive budgets for marketing. Thus, a new proposal is a pay-by-result model in which marketers get paid more for bringing increased business, but not as much if they fail to do so. As for the company’s marketing, this thought has been under consideration for months, but it is now becoming a reality. This is still a pretty unique decision but many companies are moving away from traditional forms of payment, and it remains to be seen whether this model provides a better opportunity for success and budgeting. October 2010 Projections for Siriuss sales are tied to the auto industry. Why is that? Most times, when high-end vehicles are sold, they are likely to have a trial subscription to Sirius satellite radio. These two goods are called complementary goods. The market acts as if the two are sold together. (Think about peanut butter and jelly [G if the price of peanut butter drops, people are likely to buy more of it, but they are also likely to buy more jelly to go with it). Even though the consumer who buys the car isnt paying specifically for the radio subscription, they are still paying for it when they pay for the car. Thus, while the economy may still be struggling, the auto industry has slowly improved. Sirius is benefitting from their sales. October 2010 In 2001, when AOL and Time Warner merged, it became the largest merger in the history of American business.  Recently the CEO of Time Warner has made statements reflecting that this merger was a huge mistake. Throughout the past few years, the technology and television industries have been changing rapidly, and they haven’t always supported each other.   Taking two successful companies and bringing them together seems appealing, but makes it hard to stick to each company’s values and business plans. Ultimately, both of these companies have lost value since 2001, which gives us good insight into why they are no longer together. Now there is debate over whether the merger could have worked if the companies had focused on being innovative rather than large and powerful. Either way there is a lesson to be learned. September 2010 The CEO of Netflix is heading to Toronto this month to kickoff an online video service in the Canadian market. This is set to be Netflix’s first expansion outside of the domestic market. As a result of this anticipated launch, the local cable services in Canada are prepared to meet this new competitor and have recently been increasing their online video availability. For now, Netflix is only going to offer online video service in Canada, but it may choose to expand and offer DVD disk rentals in the future. This is a very exciting step for Netflix! September 2010 Disney and Time Warner made a deal that will bring more Disney shows to Time Warner subscribers. Other companies have disrupted TV services as they worked out these types of deals, but these two companies managed to negotiate without any interruption. The reasons the companies have struggled are that the TV networks like Disney are looking for more money from TV providers like Time Warner since programming costs are rising. The problem is that customers want to save money and would be faced with higher TV subscription prices. The peaceful deal means that the industry can avoid regulation during the deal making process, which had been proposed in the past for those in the TV industry. This deal is important to the companies because it allows Disney to move its business online. Subscribers of Time Warner are given access to online sports channels. By expanding into the market for subscribers, Disney moves away from using advertisement to support its business and takes a bigger share in Time Warners market. Additionally, Time Warner received rights to sell some of Disneys shows on demand. Both companies shares rose. September 2010 Coca-Cola recently bought one of the four largest juice makers in Russia, Nidan Juices. Both Coca-Cola and their rival Pepsi Co. are looking overseas for markets where they can sell their products. Coca-Cola is still pushing to expand its line of non-carbonated drinks, so this move is big news because it works toward both. In the last 20 years, Coca-Cola has spend 2 billion dollars in Russia, and in the coming couple of years it plans to invest another billion. Over 6 months ago, Coca-Cola made its first move in acquiring Nidan. They finally sealed the deal and are hoping for great cost savings and revenue in Russia in the future.   August 2010 Sony is gearing up for the holiday season! (It’s only summer now, but Sony has to start thinking about holiday sales early). Sony’s current e-reader (a product used to read books electronically) is looking to compete with Amazon’s new product. Sony is not simply going to cut prices to outdo Amazon, instead they are trying to make their product more advanced by including a touch screen. The company is taking a bit of a risk hoping that consumers won't be able to do without a touch screen, because when Sony’s product includes all of the features that Amazon’s does (plus its exclusive touch screen), it is much more expensive. Interestingly, Amazon doesn’t care so much about selling the reader as the electronic books that go with it, because that is where it expects to make its profit. Sony is concerned just with selling the readers, so hopefully it can obtain a share of the market. August 2010 Disney is sticking to their game plan! The Walt Disney Company hasn't been mousy when it comes to making deals lately. Disney came to a deal with Miramax for $660 million and acquired Playdom for $563 million. These are just the latest moves the company has made to transform its business. The biggest deal came last summer when Disney acquired Marvel Entertainment for $4 billion. Their Club Penguin and Toontown websites have already been very successful. A big company like as Disney can afford to take some chances in buying companies that smaller companies could not afford. Disney's interest become a bigger part of the gaming business is no shock. Movies are moving online and entertainment is becoming more social and Disney is adapting to that. They have re-designed Disney retail stores. The CEO of Apple, Steve Jobs, is on Disneys Board of Directors. He is helping them build a digital entertainment system called Keychest, which will allow Disney customers to out movies on their phones, game consoles, computers and T.V. Disney shares are up around 7% so far in 2010. If you own shares in Disney, keep checking your portfolio to see the most current stock price! Or, maybe consider investing in this stock after you've done all of your research. July 2010 Bet on your pet...PetSmart is surviving the recession! Not even one of the worst recessions could slow down the billions spent by Americans on their beloved pets. Owners spent $45.5 billion on their pets in 2009, up from $43.2 billion in 2008. The projections in 2010 call for another increase. The largest, publicly- traded pet supply retailer is PetSmart, which is a Stocks in the Future stock choice! he stock has been strong, nearly hitting an all-time high in May 2010. Since spending on doggie toys is not slowing, it comes as no surprise that spending money on pets' health is following the trend. Animal-related stocks should hold up better than the overall market in the event of a new bear market. June 2010 PetSmart just announced that it will raise its quarterly dividend to 12.5 cents per share in the second quarter of fiscal 2010. This will be an income boost for the companys investors. PetSmart continues to generate cash well above the amount needed for optimal reinvestment in our business, said the companys President Bob Moran, in a statement. They are doing well! PetSmart posted revenue of $1.4 billion for a three month period, up from $1.33 billion for the same time period last year. The 12.5-cent dividend will be paid on August 13, 2010 to stockholders of record at the close of business on July 30, 2010. If you own stock in PetSmart, youll see money added to your portfolio after August 13th! June 2010 Netflix shares stumbled on Tuesday, June 15th after a Stifel Nicolaus analyst downgraded the stock, citing potential competition from the Hulu.com website.  The Analyst, George Askew, cut Netflix to "Hold" from "Buy" in a note to clients. But Netflix's movie subscription service has continued to attract droves of new customers.  Its profit was up 44 percent in the first quarter.  Still, Askew sees a rising competitor in Hulu, the online video site co-owned by News Corp., Walt Disney and General Electric 's NBC Universal.  He expects the Hule site to launch a subscription service soon that will cost about $9.95 per month and provide a bigger selection of movies and TV shows than what is available on the site's free service.  Netflix shares fell $3.18, or 2.5%, to $123.63 in afternoon trading.  Still not bad considering that SIF students bought Netflix when it was approximately $17 a share! June 2010 On June 8th the Sony Corporation, Discovery Communications and IMAX Corporation announced that they have made a next step in their joint venture to develop the first 24/7 dedicated 3D television network. Last week they announced the joint venture. Now they have hired a President & General Manager, Tom Cosgrove, to oversee the venture. The TV channel will be high-quality and there will be shows about natural history, space, adventure, science and technology. They will also show Sony, Discovery and IMAX movies. Cosgrove will help the companies with getting consumers to buy the 3D televisions and giving the channel long-term oversight. Sony’s CEO said that the new channel will be “…a groundbreaking 3D television network. We're at a turning point in entertainment history…This is the start of something really big, and we're excited about delivering high-quality 3D entertainment to people every day, all day." The companies will offer cable and satellite companies the opportunity to bring the 3D television channel to their subscribers. Put on your glasses! May 2010 Netflix stock prices are spiking noticeably higher as rumors resurface that Amazon will buy out the company. These rumors have surfaced before though, and analysts in the past have dismissed them. While the idea is certainly possible, it seems unlikely. Netflix is not valued for its mail rental service, but for its streaming business. Netflix mostly offers older movies, because new releases are too expensive for it to offer. While Amazon offers mostly newer movies, nothing is really stopping them from offering older movies, and they wouldn’t need to acquire Netflix to do so. Still, Netflix has grown greatly since even just one year ago. In the first quarter, revenue grew 25%. It is definitely a stock to keep an eye on. In fact, it might not be such a bad idea to check your portfolios now if you own any Netflix stocks… May 2010 Petsmart and General Nutrition Centers, Inc. are teaming up to provide dietary supplements for pets! Petsmart will offer this new line exclusively in their stores and on their website next fall. The companies understand that pet owners want to be able to provide balanced nutrition for their pets. Both companies view the deal as strategic. Petsmart knows GNC is a leader in dietary supplements, so they can offer their customers a superior product. GNC got the idea to launch this line because many customers in their stores specifically requested products for their pets, and they know Petsmart has expertise in pet care as well as retail capabilities. The team sees this business venture as a long-term opportunity that will set them apart. Consumers will see a unique product backed by two brands they trust. It’s a win-win-win situation. May 2010 In an attempt to expand their base of customers, Nutrisystem is launching a Spanish version of their website. They hope that they will be able to provide weight loss information to the growing number of overweight Hispanic people in the country. With better access to weight loss and nutrition resources, Nutrisystem hopes to bring healthy lifestyle changes. Since weight is becoming a bigger problem among this group of people, Nutrisystem is making their product more available, by providing the program’s information in the languages their customers are most comfortable with. May 2010 Imax recently signed a pact with Warner Brothers (part of Time Warner) to release as many as 20 Imax films through 2013. This deal ensures a supply of films for the studio, even while release dates for the planned films are pending. This pact is the biggest deal that Imax has ever signed. Imax and Warner have released 25 films together in the past, and Warner Brothers was the first studio to support Imax back before it was digital, but was using expensive prints. Imax feels a special relationship to Warner because of the early support they received. Imax will still do business with other studios because they plan to put out 14 films a year, but a significant portion of their upcoming business is now reserved for Warner Brothers. April 2010 Disney is a frontrunner in promoting healthy lifestyles among kids, with a particular focus on healthy diets and regular exercise. Currently, Disney is joining forces with First lady Michelle Obama to fight against childhood obesity. The Walt Disney Company is working on the production of public service announcements featuring the First Lady and several popular Disney stars. Even Disney TV shows will release episodes dedicated to the healthy theme. Every division of Disney (including Disney Channel, Radio Disney, Disney XD, and Disney.com) will be joining in with this campaign, entitled “Let’s Move.” April 2010 Inside of every Petsmart store is a Petsmart Charities adoption center (that means 1,149 locations in the US and Canada alone). In 2009, more than 400,000 pets found homes through Petsmart Charities. At the end of this month, Petsmart will sponsor Petsmart Charities and more than 2,000 animal-welfare organizations throughout North America in a national adoption event. Their goal is to find homes for 18,500 pets currently living in shelters and rescue agencies. Petsmart Charities works with animal-welfare agencies and now provides them with more than $10 million in adoption-reward grants. Petsmart Charities will provide larger adoption-reward grants for the agencies participating in the weekend-long adoption event. Those agencies will also receive $35 for every pet they help find a loving home, which will help them increase the quality of life for the pets they still care for. A lot of pets will soon owe a lot of thanks to Petsmart for helping to make this event happen. April 2010 The United States Postal Service wants to stop delivering mail on Saturdays. While they would save money, Netflix would lose a lot of their business if they couldn’t use the mail service on Saturdays. For Netflix, it would mean less opportunity for customers to rent DVDs and it would also make Netflix customers less happy because they would have to wait longer to get their movies. Netflix is the biggest corporation that the Postal Service works with, but others would be affected too. Congress will get to vote on the final decision. If the businesses, unions, and patrons protest enough, the USPS will have to continue six-day delivery each week. April 2010 Time Warner is attempting to buy the film studio Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer (MGM). Having outbid its rivals with an offer of $1.5 billion, Time Warner still hopes to make the purchase. Time Warner is not worried that some other companies have withdrawn their offers for MGM. MGM is valuable for its film library, which has rights to such films as James Bond and 12 Angry Men. At the same time, MGM has $3.7 Billion worth of debt. Since Time Warner is involved in entertainment and media, rights to MGM’s film library could be profitable. Still, taking on MGM’s debt might be risky business. March 2010   This year’s Sony Ericsson Open is greatly anticipated by guests of the ATP and Sony Ericsson WTA Tours. The entertainment events heighten the excitement of the two-week tennis tours. Most of the events are open to the Miami public, who especially enjoy a fashion show as well as party tours, stage entertainment, and performances. The fashion show is put on by FILA, Sony Ericsson’s athleticwear sponsor. FILA will also make James Blake, Svetlana Kuznetsova, and Kim Clijsters available for questions on the entertainment stage. At the party tours, guests are privvy to live music, Sony Playstation competitions, and big-screen coverage highlights from the 2009 Open. Models hand out giveaways as athletes sign autographs. Throughout the tournament, entertainment events such as live music and zoo demonstrations will be presented to the crowd. Roger Federer will play the opening match as the world’s #1 ranked tennis player in the wake of these glamorous events. March 2010 Recent news revealed quite a secret of Grace Groner, a 100-year old woman who just died.  She lived in a small one-bedroom home that was given to her in Chicago, Illinois.  She purchased clothes at rummage sales, never owned a car, used mismatched dishes and watched T.V. on an old set.  She never married and had no children. For 43 years, Grade was a secretary at Abbott Laboratories (a pharmaceutical company).  In 1935, she bought 3 shares of the company’s stock for $60 each.  Over time, she re-invested the dividends.  When she died, her wisdom of keeping stocks instead of selling showed.  Her 3 shares of stock now has value of $7 million!  She left her money to Lake Forest College where she attended, along with her ‘fancy’ house that is now named Grace’s Cottage. March 2010 The Federal Communications Commission may be causing some problems for Sirius Satellite Radio in the next few years. The FCC plans to allow other companies to make broadcasts in the air space next to the blocks of space where Sirius makes its broadcasts. Although the spaces do not overlap, Sirius’s broadcasts would face interference. When the FCC originally sold the spectrum bordering Sirius, they said that no one else could make broadcasts that would interfere with Sirius Satellite Radio. The other wireless carriers want to use more space now, and the FCC may allow them to do so, meaning that they would get in the way of Sirius’s transmissions. Sirius is afraid that if the wireless carriers are allowed to broadcast more, and they do end up interfering with satellite radio, Sirius’s 35 million listeners that are affected might simply drop satellite service. Of course, listeners could always bring up complaints when interference does happen, but Sirius wants to prevent the problem before it starts. March 2010 This week the Coca-Cola Scholars Foundation named their Class Scholars for the year. This Foundation provides corporate-sponsored scholarships to high school seniors so they can pursue a college education. Those who receive the scholarship are chosen for their academics, leadership, and contribution to their school community. This month, finalists will tour the Coca-Cola company headquarters in Atlanta and compete for scholarships of up to $20,000. The Foundation was established to commemorate Coca-Cola’s 100th anniversary and is now in its 22nd year. With the 2010 class, the Foundation will have provided $42 million in scholarships to 4,529 deserving students. February 2010 Time Warner is offering free services to its digital phone customers in Haiti until the end of this month. All direct-dial calls to landlines and cell phones will be free, to help in the relief efforts. Also, any charges that have been made on these services after January 12 will automatically be repaid back to customers. Customers do not need to make any changes; refunds for their bills will simply be credited to their accounts. Time Warner believes that this program will save their customers about $200,000. February 2010 Thomas Staggs used to be Walt Disney Company’s chief financial officer, but now he is Disney’s new theme park chairman. Mr. Staggs has traded in a life of business at Wall Street and work with numbers for a pair of Mickey Mouse Ears. He began Disney’s promotion for “Give a Day, Get a Disney Day” by presenting a crowd of people at Disney’s Epcot with sculptures of beloved Disney characters – made out of 115,000 cans of food! Those cans were donated to food banks. Disney hoped to inspire people to complete a day of community service with the Points of Light Foundation. For a limited time, Disney is offering park tickets to those who volunteer their time. So far about 600,000 people have done so.   February 2010 Sony is creating a new reality show for the PlayStation 3 called “The Tester.” Eleven game fans will test out games all hoping to be the best game tester and to win the grand prize of getting a job as an actual game tester at Sony. Sony is doing this in an attempt to provide more than just games for their PlayStation users. They want the PlayStation to provide music, movies, and TV episodes, like “The Tester.” This show will start February 18. January 2010 Since 1928, Coca-Cola Company has partnered with the Olympic Games. In light of the upcoming 2010 Vancouver Olympic Games, Coca-Cola is launching an advertising campaign featuring a small group of U.S. Olympic Champions. They are known as Coca-Cola’s “Six-Pack” of athletes and are serving as “ambassadors of active living” to motivate people to live healthily. You may recognize Apolo Anton Ohno, Gretchen Bleiler, Angela Ruggiero, Evan Lysacek, and Keauna McLaughlin & Rockne Brubaker in some of the new Coca-Cola Olympic TV commercials. Coca-Cola is also releasing new collectible cans with silhouettes inspired by some of the most popular sports in the Olympic Winter Games such as figure skating, ice hockey, speed skating, and snowboarding. January 2010 Wall Street firms seem to be taking the hint from Washington and cutting back on employee bonuses this year; President Barack Obama called bank bonuses “obscene” twice in the past week.  Some bank employees were receiving bonuses of over $5 million, which is upsetting for many taxpayers, considering that their taxes paid to get a lot of banks out of trouble in recent years. Bank employees, however, are used to receiving these bonuses so the Chief Financial Officer at Goldman Sachs says that he has tried to balance public needs and employee needs in order to be fair. January 2010 This spring, Netflix is going to expand their service. They will offer video streaming on Wii consoles so people will be able to use Wii to watch movies. It will not cost current Netflix members any more money as long as they already have a Wii and an internet connection. The company hopes that non-members who already have a Wii will be interested in the movie service and purchase membership. Netflix will send their members a special disk for streaming media that they just have to pop into their Wii. Netflix already offers this service through other video game consoles, some of which even offer high-definition streaming. January 2010 Sony announced official plans to launch a 3-D home TV channel in 2011. To do this, they will partner with Discovery Communications and the Imax Corporation. A recent study showed that 3-D TV may be the next big hit in home entertainment. Sony is following an announcement from the Walt Disney Company who announced it will release a 3-D TV channel soon. Sony and other TV manufacturers plan to produce special TVs with 3-D capability this year.  January 2010 Since this year marks the beginning of a new decade, many are looking back on what has happened in the last ten years. It may be that this past decade was the worst ever for stocks. The S&P 500 had a negative total return for the first time in history. The S&P 500 measures the total return of the market, adding up the returns of all the stocks including the positives and negatives.  December 2009 The Coca-Cola Company and the Ecoist Company have teamed up again to prevent unused Coca-Cola bottle labels from being dumped in landfills.This partnership will help Coca-Cola to reach its company's goal of producing no waste. Ecoist will take the used labels and sew them into handmade handbags that will be sold to the public. The companies will also plant a tree for every bag that is sold.  The partners were once connected before, in 2007, and at that time were able to stop 1 million Coca-Cola labels from sitting in landfills.  By re-starting their partnership, Coke hopes to inspire people to see the labels as new and usable, instead of seeing them as garbage. December 2009

The Walt Disney Company

In poker, what is the name of a behavioral tick that gives away a players hand?

Silver Screen, the General Movie Discussion [Archive] - GameFace.Ph Joescoundrel 12-22-2011, 09:49 AM I thought I'd start a general movie discussion similar to the "Wala Lang" and "Politikahan" threads in this main Forum board. This came about because I just remembered that there are two movies that are a little bitin. First, "League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" with Sean Connery in the lead, and secondly "Hellboy" starring Ron Pearlman. "League" ended with Connery's character, the legendary hunter Allan Quartermain, dead and buried in his beloved Africa. But a local Shaman was casting some sort of spell to apparently bring him back from the dead. I hope to see a sequel soon. Speaking of sequels, "Hellboy" had two movies and the last one, good as it was in my opinion, needs to have a bookend to complete a trilogy. After all, a prediction was made in "The Golden Army" that Hellboy would either die or fulfill the demonic prophecy about him and end this world. The producers and directors should end this properly. If Pearlman no longer wants the lead, they can always tap Jason Momoa (Khal Drogo to the Game of Thrones fans). So there, a new thread to end the year in movie entertainment. You can also post movie reviews here, fellas. Sam Miguel From the NY Times, more on the business side of the movies ___ A Year of Disappointment at the Movie Box Office By BROOKS BARNES With five days left in 2011, ticket sales in North America are running about $500 million behind last year — despite higher prices — prompting a round of soul searching by studios trying to determine what went wrong and how best to proceed. “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2,” from Warner Brothers, was 2011’s No. 1 release with $381 million in domestic ticket sales. Movies are a cyclical business and analysts say that 2010 benefited mightily from holdover sales for “Avatar,” which was released late in 2009 and became one of the most popular movies of all time. A decline of hundreds of millions of dollars is not catastrophic when weighed against the size of the industry. Over all, North American ticket revenue for 2011 is projected to be about $10.1 billion, according to Hollywood.com, which compiles box-office data. That is only a 4.5 percent falloff from 2010. But studio executives are alarmed by the downturn nonetheless, in part because the real picture is worse than the raw revenue numbers suggest. Revenue, for instance, has been propped up by a glut of 3-D films, which cost $3 to $5 more per ticket. Studios made 40 pictures in 3-D in the last 12 months, up from 24 last year, according to BoxOfficeMojo.com, a movie database. Theaters have also continued to increase prices for standard tickets; moviegoers now pay an average of $7.89 each, up 1 percent over last year. Attendance for 2011 is expected to drop 5.3 percent, to 1.27 billion, continuing a slide. Attendance declined 6 percent in 2010. Hopes that a group of major releases would supercharge the Christmas box office fizzled over the weekend. Paramount’s “Mission: Impossible — Ghost Protocol” was a solid No. 1, taking in $26.5 million in its second weekend for a total of about $59 million. But “Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” (Warner Brothers) was a softer-than-expected second, with $17.8 million in ticket sales, lifting its two-week total to $76.6 million. “Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked” (20th Century Fox) continued to struggle in third place, taking in about $13.3 million for a two-week total of $50.3 million. Three heavily promoted new entries had tepid results. “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” (Sony), was fourth, taking in $13 million for the weekend and $21.4 million since opening last Wednesday. Steven Spielberg’s “Adventures of Tintin” (Paramount) was fifth with about $9.1 million ($22.3 million since opening last Wednesday). Fox’s “We Bought a Zoo” came in sixth, taking in a lackluster $7.8 million in its opening weekend. What has gone wrong? Plenty, say studio distribution executives, who point to competition for leisure dollars, particularly among financially pressed young people (the movie industry’s most coveted demographic); too many family movies; and the continued erosion of star power. One more thing: “You have to go back and look at the content,” said Dan Fellman, president of domestic distribution for Warner Brothers. “Good movies always rise to the occasion. Bad ones, not so much.” Young people, defined by studios as teenagers and people in their 20s, certainly helped power some of the biggest movies of 2011, including Warner’s “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2,” the year’s No. 1 release with $381 million in domestic ticket sales. (Paramount’s “Transformers: Dark of the Moon” was second with more than $352 million, and “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn — Part 1” from Summit Entertainment was third with more than $269 million.) But a spate of smaller movies aimed at younger audiences bombed, including “Prom” from Walt Disney, “Glee: The 3-D Concert Movie” from 20th Century Fox, Warner’s “Sucker Punch,” Lionsgate’s “Conan the Barbarian” and “Your Highness,” a drug-oriented comedy from Universal. The horror genre struggled as an entire category, with lemons like “Fright Night” (DreamWorks Studios), “The Thing” (Universal) and “Priest” (Sony). “As bad as the economy is for adults, it’s worse for teenagers,” said Phil Contrino, editor of BoxOffice.com, by way of an explanation. “Because they have less disposable income and because they are more plugged in to audience reaction on Facebook and Twitter, the teenage audience is becoming picky,” he added. “That’s a nightmare for studios that are used to pushing lowest-common-denominator films.” Mr. Fellman said he had seen evidence that younger consumers were choosing other leisure activities over movies. “There may be a correlation to the recent strength of video game sales,” he said. “You look at a game like the new ‘Call of Duty’ selling $400 million in its first 24 hours and say, ‘What? How is that even possible?’ ” On the other hand, several movies aimed squarely at older audiences attracted stronger-than-expected revenue, “The Help” was the prime example. That period drama cost DreamWorks about $25 million to make and took in more than $169 million in North America. “We definitely benefited from coming out at the end of summer, when women are sick of going with their husbands and boyfriends to nothing but robot and superhero movies,” said Brunson Green, a producer of the film. The R-rated “Bridesmaids” (Universal) also clicked with older moviegoers, who perhaps responded, distribution executives said, to a premise that seemed fresh: women behaving as badly as the guys of “The Hangover Part II” (Warner), which was a smash with $255 million. “Bridesmaids” cost about $33 million and took in $169 million, causing a race in Hollywood to develop copycat films. Too much of anything, however, can produce a hangover and studios started to feel one with family films, which have been among the most reliable moneymakers in recent years. Some new entries delivered solid results, “Rio” from Fox, “The Smurfs” from Sony, but a number of them stumbled in North America. Those include Sony’s “Arthur Christmas,” DreamWorks Animation’s “Kung Fu Panda 2” and Disney’s “Mars Needs Moms,” which was by some measures the biggest flop of 2011, costing at least $150 million and taking in about $21 million. Even Pixar had trouble. The Disney-owned animation studio had a hit in “Cars 2,” with more than $191 million in domestic ticket sales, but that total was Pixar’s worst single result, after adjusting for inflation. Star power, or a lack thereof, was again a negative factor at the box office in 2011. There were bright spots, of course: Tom Cruise appears to be regaining momentum with the latest “Mission: Impossible” film; Johnny Depp charmed audiences once more with “The Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides,” which took in $241 million for Disney (and exceeded $1 billion globally); Cameron Diaz earned her keep in “Bad Teacher,” which took in more than $100 million for Sony. But it was wreckage for most marquee names: Harrison Ford and Daniel Craig disappointed in the DreamWorks and Universal release “Cowboys & Aliens;” Eddie Murphy and Ben Stiller landed with a thud in “Tower Heist,” a Universal film; Julia Roberts and Tom Hanks bombed in the independently financed “Larry Crowne.” “New Year’s Eve,” essentially a string of star cameos, has been essentially ignored. More troubling, studio executives say, were failed efforts by some younger stars to become bigger box-office draws. Ryan Reynolds never took off as “Green Lantern” and Jonah Hill, praised for a supporting role in “Moneyball,” flopped as the main attraction in “The Sitter.” Russell Brand missed in a remake of “Arthur,” as did Taylor Lautner in “Abduction.” Amanda Seyfried struggled in “Red Riding Hood.” Two exceptions were Chris Hemsworth as “Thor” and Chris Evans as “Captain America: The First Avenger.” Both of those newcomers, helped by their superhero tights, found substantial audiences. The good news for Hollywood is that the first quarter of 2012 looks much stronger than the same period this year, when studios had little to generate audience excitement. Warner has two sequels — “Journey 2: The Mysterious Island” and “Wrath of the Titans,” while Sony has a prominent remake in “21 Jump Street.” Disney will re-release “Beauty and the Beast” in 3-D, followed by Fox’s 3-D re-release of “Star Wars: Episode I — The Phantom Menace.” And Lionsgate will weigh in with its highly anticipated “The Hunger Games.” “It’s an extremely strong hand for the industry to play,” Mr. Fellman said. Sam Miguel New Directors Flesh Out Black America, All of It By NELSON GEORGE EARLY in Dee Rees’s film “Pariah” it journeys into a Brooklyn strip club where scantily clad young black women gyrate to a sexy, foul-mouthed rap song. Lascivious customers leer, toss money and revel in their own unbridled lust. It is a scene that could have been in any of “the hood movies” that once proliferated or even a Tyler Perry melodrama in which Christian values would be affirmed after this bit of titillation. But in “Pariah” the gaze of desire doesn’t emanate from predatory males but A.G.’s, that is aggressive lesbians, who, in a safe space where they enjoy the fellowship of peers, can be true to themselves. Other films have depicted this particular black alternative life (as did a couple of memorable characters in HBO’s masterly series “The Wire”), but no film made by a black lesbian about being a black lesbian has ever received the kind of attention showered on Ms. Rees’s film. It was a major success at the Sundance Festival in January and, even before its limited release on Wednesday, has entered the conversation as a long shot Oscar contender courtesy of the aggressive folks at NBC Universal’s specialty arm, Focus Features. Ms. Rees, a slight, boyish 34-year-old with a shy demeanor, was recently named breakthrough director of the year at the Gotham Awards, and the film received two Spirit Award nominations, acknowledgements of good will toward the picture in the independent film world. But “Pariah” is important, not simply as a promising directorial debut, but also as the most visible example of the mini-movement of young black filmmakers telling stories that complicate assumptions about what “black film” can be by embracing thorny issues of identity, alienation and sexuality. In addition to “Pariah” these features include Rashaad Ernesto Green’s “Gun Hill Road,” Andrew Dosunmu’s “Restless City,” Alrick Brown’s “Kinyarwanda” and Victoria Mahoney’s “Yelling to the Sky.” The first four made their premieres at Sundance in January, while Ms. Mahoney’s effort appeared at the Berlin Film Festival in February. (Two other films that should also be added to this group: Barry Jenkins’s “Medicine for Melancholy,” from 2008, a day in the life of two black bohemians wandering the streets of San Francisco, and Qasim Basir’s “Mooz-lum” (2011), a character study of a Muslim teenager in the Midwest.) Along with their festival pedigrees these films and filmmakers share a number of connections. Ms. Rees, Mr. Green and Mr. Brown all attended New York University and received guidance from a professor named Spike Lee. ”Pariah” and “Restless City” were both shot by Bradford Young, a brilliant young director of photography who won the excellence in cinematography award at Sundance. Most important, the points of view of the films expand the palette of images for black American filmmakers. Mr. Green’s “Gun Hill Road” is set in the Bronx and looks at the tension among a Latino ex-con father, his transgender son and the son’s black lover. Mr. Brown’s film, shot in Central Africa, uses multiple story arcs to dive into the moral abyss of the Rwandan genocide. Mr. Dosunmu captures the hustles and hardships of African immigrants working in and around Canal Street in Manhattan. Ms. Mahoney presents an autobiographical look at a family of a young woman growing up black and Irish in a quasi-suburban, quasi-hood section of Queens. Ms. Rees’s film, though clearly a coming-out story, is also about the ethical evasions affecting all members of a seemingly stable African-American family. I use African-American, as opposed to black, very specifically in describing the drama at the heart of “Pariah,” since African-American means descendants of African slaves brought to America. Black, however, casts a wider net in dealing with works that depict the lives of people from the entire African diaspora. Mr. Green, who is black and Puerto Rican, and Ms. Mahoney, who is black-Irish, tap into both sides of their ethnicity in their films, just as Ms. Rees looks at herself as both black and lesbian, reconciling the two in her work just as her protagonist does in the film. The African-American Alrick Brown’s journey into the thickets of a brutal African experience and the Nigerian Andrew Dosunmu’s vision of life for Africans in America represent a much needed, unromantic dialogue between blacks on both sides of the Atlantic. Traditionally films made for, and often by, African-Americans have fallen within a very narrow definition of our experience. Forty years ago the notorious blaxploitation era was in full stride with crime melodramas its stock and trade. Though there was plenty of hack filmmaking then, some gifted directors (Melvin Van Peebles, Gordon Parks, Gordon Parks Jr.) helped create a worthwhile canon of films in which “the brother man” consistently trumped “the other man” (white authority). Many of the accompanying soundtracks (Isaac Hayes’s “Shaft,” Curtis Mayfield’s “Superfly,” Marvin Gaye’s “Trouble Man”) were more artful than the images they supported. Twenty years later, in 1991, 16 films were released theatrically that were directed, produced or written by African-Americans, a historic year that was documented in a cover article in The New York Times Magazine. (I was part of that wave. My screenwriting credits include the 1991 comedy “Strictly Business.”) In retrospect the films of 1991 were really quite varied: a tale of Afrocentric feminism (“Daughters of the Dust”), interracial love drama (“Jungle Fever”), soul era nostalgia (“The Five Heartbeats”). But it was hood movies that grossed the most at the box office (“Boyz N the Hood,” “New Jack City”) and defined that period. If there is any historical precedent for this emerging 21st-century movement, it is a collective of black filmmakers who attended the University of California, Los Angeles, in the ’70s, making films that existed under the commercial radar and addressed subjects from neo-realism to pan-Africanism. Among the standout writer-directors in this loose collective were Haile Gerima, Julie Dash and Charles Burnett, whose 1977 masterpiece, “Killer of Sheep,” has been inducted in the National Film Registry. The desire to identify a new generation of black filmmakers is as important for American cinema as it is for filmmakers and audiences. Halle Berry, Cuba Gooding Jr., Samuel L. Jackson, Wesley Snipes, Queen Latifah, Ice Cube, Regina King and Nia Long are among the Oscar nominees, leading men and women, and television regulars who were given their first major exposure in films written, produced and directed by African-Americans. A generation of household faces came out of these films, faces that would otherwise never have had star-making opportunities to carry a film. That these actors crossed over, often to colorblind roles in mainstream entertainment, is a testament to both their skills and the underappreciated role black filmmakers have played as talent scouts. The acclaim for the previously unknown Adepero Oduye’s performance as the young lesbian Alike in “Pariah” is typical of how black film spotlights otherwise marginalized actors. And there is a very human desire to see people on screen who resemble you, but are better looking, stronger and larger than life. It is the power of movies at their most elemental. This current mini-movement has none of the certainty about black identity that defined previous periods. Identity — the search for it, the limitations of it, its fluidity — is at the core of all these dramas. Such themes speak to a sophistication that previous generations of filmmakers didn’t possess or rejected since rigid definitions of racial identity are much easier to market. Then again, none of these films have made a substantial dent at the box office. So a lot rides on the reception for “Pariah,” both as the introduction of Ms. Rees as a major filmmaker and a symbol of this incipient new wave. Certainly some of the excitement surrounding it was ignited by “Precious” in 2009. Both films are small dramas about sexual issues confronting young African-American women in New York City. “Precious,” Lee Daniels’s gothic take on Sapphire’s novel, made $63 million worldwide (on a budget of $10 million), won the screenwriter Geoffrey Fletcher an Oscar for his bold adaptation, and was anointed by Oprah Winfrey and Tyler Perry as executive producers. The film played well to mainstream as well as black audiences, which may have emboldened Mr. Perry to direct “For Colored Girls” (2010), an adaptation of Ntozake Shange’s feminist play, and surely factored into the marketing strategy for this year’s black-women-theme blockbuster, “The Help.” That’s not to suggest that ”Pariah” subscribes to any kind of formula. There is a gentle, almost tentative quality to the journey of Alike (subtly played by Ms. Oduye) that is very much a reflection of Ms. Rees’s personality. This highly autobiographical film began as a feature script in 2005, became a much-lauded short and was expanded back into a feature, with the support of a bevy of executive producers and independent film institutions (Sundance Institute, Tribeca Film Institute, IFP, Film Independent). It was shot in 19 days in and around Brooklyn. While attending New York University from 2003 to 2007 Ms. Rees worked as an intern on Spike Lee’s Hurricane Katrina documentary “When the Levees Broke,” and his Denzel Washington vehicle, “Inside Man.” Mr. Lee, who has been the artistic director of N.Y.U.’s graduate film program for nearly a decade, critiqued drafts of the script and advised Ms. Rees and her producer, Nekisa Cooper, on fund-raising. At N.Y.U. Ms. Rees came in contact with Mr. Brown, Mr. Green and several other emerging talents, including Seith Mann, a graduate who has built a successful career directing television dramas like “Dexter.” “During Seith’s time a lot of the black students began calling themselves ‘the League,’ ” Ms. Rees told me, a reference to the all-black baseball league that ended in the ’50s. The shorthand speaks to a sense of camaraderie that is shared by many of the black students there. If there’s a thread connecting their work, it is that “none of us have reductive views” of black identity, she said. “There are different ways to be. There is no monolithic black identity. My film is less about coming out than becoming into who you are and how to be that person. I think we want an extreme diversity of images and voices. And it is not enough to have a lot of films in one year, but to have an ongoing supply of films.” Mr. Lee, who taught Ms. Rees, Mr. Green and Mr. Brown in his third-year directing class, is cautious about too much talk of a new wave, noting that very few of the directors who emerged in ’91 are still making features. Still, Mr. Lee, whose own feature “Red Hook Summer” will have its debut at Sundance, is “optimistic about the talent out there and the work being done,” he said in an interview. “But I told Alrick, Dee and Ernesto all the same thing: You got one done, but you can’t rest on your laurels. Don’t make one film and then travel with that one print to film festivals. You need to get the next one going and the one after that. The idea is to build a body of work.” Ms. Rees has been busy doing just that since Sundance, writing an HBO pilot, another film for Focus and a spec script about an insurance adjuster, all featuring lesbian or bisexual characters. “Sexuality is not an issue” in these scripts, Ms. Rees cautioned. And in a comment that could refer to racial identity as well, she added, “They are people, and that’s just part of who they are.” Sam Miguel Streep Dons Thatcher’s Armor By CHARLES McGRATH WHAT do you do after turning yourself into Julia Child, a bold, occasionally bossy woman who changed the way people think about food? You turn yourself into Margaret Thatcher, of course, an even bolder and bossier one, who changed the way people think about Britain. This is what Meryl Streep does in “The Iron Lady,” which opens Friday in New York. In yet another of her miraculous impersonations, which has already been nominated for a Golden Globe award, she seems even more Thatcher-like than Mrs. Thatcher, so that after the movie if you go back and look at photographs of Mrs. Thatcher in her prime, you can’t help feeling that they’re a little off. She no longer looks like herself. Sitting over tea recently at the Waldorf Astoria with Phyllida Lloyd, the film’s director, Ms. Streep said that she had been hoping to make a movie about Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, and that Ms. Lloyd told her sarcastically, “Yeah, that will pack them in.” But when offered the role of Mrs. Thatcher, Ms. Streep didn’t hesitate. “You have to imagine yourself as a 62-year-old actress getting a phone call asking you to play the first female leader in the Western world elected on her own merits and not on the coattails of her husband,” she said. “To say, ‘No, I’m not interested’ would just be ridiculous. There is no other opportunity like it.” Ms. Streep researched her part carefully enough to learn even what Mrs. Thatcher carried in her handbag: 3-by-5 cards with adages by Kipling, Shakespeare, Abraham Lincoln and Disraeli. She also realized, she said, that Mrs. Thatcher, who is now 86 and in ill health, was herself an impersonation of sorts, a woman who allowed herself to be made over by Tory strategists and even changed her way of speaking. In the movie Ms. Streep effortlessly imitates those burnished, sometimes strident, declamatory tones, the one the novelist Angela Carter once said were reminiscent “not of real toffs but of Wodehouse aunts.” Ms. Lloyd said: “Meryl just has an ear. There’s a Margaret Thatcher voice that British impersonators — men in drag — like to do, and it’s a frightful parody. But nobody has really gone inside it the way Meryl has.” Ms. Streep also captures Mrs. Thatcher’s icy imperiousness, especially toward the end of her career, when she enjoyed humiliating her ministers, and even the hint of sexiness that kept so many of those ministers in thrall for so long. In one scene Ms. Streep is in an evening gown, having a button sewn on before an important Tory function, and when the seamstress is through she hoists her bosom, like Queen Boadicea putting on her breastplate, before going out to challenge a roomful of men. But “The Iron Lady” is not, everyone involved keeps insisting, a conventional biopic, one that follows the career of some exalted personage step by step and ends with him or her in triumph. It’s not even an especially political film. The movie begins in the present, with the Thatcher character old and frail, a little dotty and paranoid, and hallucinating the presence of her dead husband, Denis (Jim Broadbent). She appears that way for almost half the film, revisiting her great days only in memory, so that “The Iron Lady” is a movie as much about decline as about a rise to power. The great events of Mrs. Thatcher’s career — the miners’ strike, the Falklands war, her meetings with Brezhnev (who gave her the Iron Lady nickname) — are touched on only briefly and sketchily. The movie has provoked strong but mixed reactions in Britain, where some have seen it as a mean-spirited attack on Mrs. Thatcher’s sacred memory, while others have applauded its warmth and humanity. Some Conservative M.P.’s have even called for a House of Commons debate over whether the film shows sufficient good taste and respect. “There have been people who have seen the movie and were fully aghast, who would have liked it to be a triumphalist saga,” Ms. Streep said. “Some in the distribution arm of our own enterprise here were saying, ‘Why can’t we go out on a high?’ ” She changed her voice to sound like an old-fashioned movie mogul. “My God, for 40 percent of the picture she’s an old lady!” She paused for a moment and then changed back to Streep: “That’s the point, you dodo.” Ms. Streep and Ms. Lloyd (who also directed her in “Mamma Mia”) have by now perfected a kind of “Stage Door” routine together, with Ms. Lloyd — polished, thoughtful — in the Katharine Hepburn part and Ms. Streep in the funny, irreverent Ginger Rogers role. Ms. Streep loves to laugh and also to surprise. At one point, mostly just for the fun of it, she began speaking in the clipped, unnatural voice of a 1930s film star. “The Iron Lady” was written by Abi Morgan, a British screenwriter greatly in demand these days. She wrote “The Hour,” the “Mad Men”-like BBC serial about television in the ’50s, and together with Steve McQueen, its director, she wrote “Shame,” the new film about sex addiction that despite copious amounts of nudity, male and female, is bleak enough to put most viewers off sex for a couple of days at least. Ms. Morgan said she was initially reluctant to take on the “Iron Lady” project. There had been at least four made-for-TV Thatcher movies fairly recently, she explained — including the well-regarded “Long Walk to Finchley” — and she didn’t think she had much to add. Then she happened to read a magazine article by Mrs. Thatcher’s daughter, Carol, about the moment she realized that her mother’s memory was beginning to slip, and that gave Ms. Morgan the idea of writing about a woman who is starting to fail and at the same time looking back on her life. “What would it be like? I wondered. You’re a woman who was on the world stage and had access to some of the most important decisions in the country, and now to a certain extent you’ve become invisible.” She added: “I really think we will all die while washing up the teacups. Whether you’re Obama or the man in the street, we all die doing those domestic things that we do.” Ms. Lloyd, who is probably better known as a stage director than a filmmaker, said she sometimes thought of “The Iron Lady” as “ ‘King Lear’ for girls.” “Here is this mighty leader reduced to nothing,” she added. “No, not to nothing — to a reckoning with herself.” Ms. Streep said, laughing: “We’re not interested in King Lear’s politics. We’re not saying we would have voted for him.” She added: “What interested me was the part of someone who does monstrous things maybe, or misguided things. Where do they come from? How do those formulations begin, how do they solidify, calcify, become deficits? How do a person’s strengths become weaknesses? Look at me. I tend to go on too long. I’m a little dogmatic, and that could get really awful over time. If you are self-aware, as actors are, you let these things go into your pores, including criticism. I hate being criticized.” Ms. Lloyd said: “So did Margaret Thatcher. But that’s understandable. She couldn’t show weakness. Imagine what the men would have said.” She added: “In parts of England now it’s a transgression even to consider her as a human being. She’s that monster woman, the she-devil. For me the point of the film was to find the human side.” And though hardly a Tory, she said she vividly recalled the moment when Mrs. Thatcher came to power. “Just as I remember not voting for her, I remember sitting in my room at university when the radio announced that she had been asked to form a government, and I went ‘Yes!’ It felt like one for our team.” Ms. Streep nodded and said: “I did the same thing. We all thought if it can happen in England, class bound, socially rigid, homophobic — if they can elect a female leader over there, then it’s just seconds away in America.” Sam Miguel A Shady American in the Nanjing Massacre By MIKE HALE Eventually, it seems, every senseless waste of life gets its own gauzy tear-jerker. That’s about the only way to justify “The Flowers of War,” in which the veteran Chinese director Zhang Yimou revisits the Nanjing massacre of 1937 by making something resembling a backstage musical, with breaks for the occasional ghastly murder or rape. There’s nothing that says the atrocity blockbuster has to be a disaster in its own right; films like “Gone With the Wind” and “Gallipoli” have their good points. But long before its two and a half hours are up, “The Flowers of War” is sunk by the disproportion between the events being portrayed and Mr. Zhang’s distanced, strangely frivolous treatment of them — in essence, his refusal to take a point of view on one of the most gruesome chapters in Chinese history. “Flowers” has received bountiful publicity for being expensive, state-approved and Oscar-submitted, buzz that got louder last week when the film’s British star, Christian Bale, was forcibly prevented from visiting a Chinese activist lawyer being held under house arrest. But fears that Mr. Zhang would take a one-dimensional, patriotic approach to the Japanese invasion and occupation of Nanjing (formerly Nanking), while not entirely unfounded, are misplaced. Other recent Chinese films have displayed more sentimental nationalism, jingoism and demonization of the Japanese enemy. His real approach to the events of 1937 is to use them as a backdrop for the kind of deluxe, Hollywood-inspired melodrama that has made him an art-house favorite. In the process he fails to deliver on most of the elements — grandeur, historical sweep, genuine pathos — that would have made the film worthwhile. Given the right story, as in “Raise the Red Lantern” or “House of the Flying Daggers,” Mr. Zhang’s almost clinical attention to pretty surfaces and soap-opera mechanics can have entertaining results. In “Flowers,” though, you can feel him at war with his material, never settling on a tone or a compelling or even coherent narrative. (The screenplay is by Liu Heng and Geling Yan, based on a novel by Ms. Yan.) Mr. Zhang’s distance from the larger story of the massacre is embodied in his decision to set most of the film within the compound of a fictional European church. The result is an artificial, back-lot atmosphere; the opening scenes, set in the streets, take place in an actual fog of war, with smoke (and at one point the dust from a large mound of flour) isolating the characters from the real world of Nanjing. Mr. Bale plays John Miller, a disreputable American vagabond who happens to be a mortician; as the film begins he is making his way through the fighting toward the church, where he is to be paid to conduct a burial. Also on the move are two groups of a dozen or so young women, the flowers of the title. They are, as a matter of production design if not credible history, visually coded: convent students in severe blue jackets and prostitutes in seductive, rainbow-hued silken dresses. All of these parties take refuge in the church, with Miller, who dons the robes of a dead priest, bridging the Manichaean divide between the suspicious students upstairs and the contemptuous, defensive prostitutes hiding in the basement. (They quickly transform their cellar into a seraglio; you can practically smell the perfume.) It’s a contrived, hothouse state of affairs, summed up in a scene Mr. Zhang likes so much that he repeats it: the laughing prostitutes sashaying across the churchyard in slow motion, oblivious to the impending tragedy. There will be tragedy, of course, though when it comes it takes a weirdly oblique form. One group eventually performs what appears to be an ultimate sacrifice, full of sexual and social overtones, but this happens off-camera, if it happens at all. The coyness can be explained, perhaps, in terms of the film’s structure — the story is narrated by one of the students, and what we see may correspond to her selective, romanticized memories — but it cannot really be excused. On-screen, meanwhile, the camera ventures into the outside world in occasional scenes that seem timed to goose the action and remind us that we’re watching a war movie. In one of Mr. Zhang’s few outright concessions to the notion of Chinese supremacism, a lone officer (Tong Dawai) draws a contingent of Japanese soldiers away from the church in an act of hyperbolic heroism. Later, in a surrender to gross sentimentality, two prostitutes leave the church on the sort of insane mercy mission that happens only in movies, with particularly disturbing consequences. Aside from that sequence Mr. Zhang is restrained in his depictions of Japanese brutality, which mostly take the form of threats and intimidation. Mr. Bale, turning in a respectable if oddly chipper performance under the circumstances, has the unfortunate task of playing a character who doesn’t really add up. Miller’s conversion from opportunist to savior may be another stock element of this sort of movie, but the scene meant to showcase his transformation is rushed and ineffective. Having made an American the central figure in his film, Mr. Zhang reduces him to wrangling flocks of nubile women, like Cary Grant in a much more violent “Father Goose.” “The Flowers of War” suffers greatly in comparison to several far superior, less hyped movies about the Nanjing massacre, including the harrowing drama “City of Life and Death,” directed by Lu Chuan, and the documentary “Nanking,” by Bill Guttentag and Dan Sturman. Those filmmakers came armed with points of view. Mr. Zhang, retreating into the mists of old movies, has declined to take the field. Sam Miguel In a Fractured Society, Ethnic War Kindles Both Hatred and Desire By MANOHLA DARGIS “In the Land of Blood and Honey” tells the story of two acquaintances who become enemies, lovers and each other’s mirror during the Bosnian war. The movie opens in 1992 right before the fighting started and soon after Ajla (Zana Marjanovic), an artist and a Muslim, goes on a date with Danijel (Goran Kostic), a cop and a Bosnian Serb. Recently acquainted, the two meet up at a club, where they fall into each other’s arms, dance and flirt, nestled in an exuberant, raucous humanity, a communion that abruptly ends when a bomb detonates inside the club. The old world falls away and in its place there is dust, blood and Ajla and Danijel staggering toward their newly divided worlds. The war comes fast and the director, Angelina Jolie, sets its terms ruthlessly. Ajla, along with several dozen other Muslim women, is grabbed by Serbian soldiers and put on a bus. It’s a short, hellish ride — from the bus, one of the soldiers guns down a passerby as casually as if he were skeet shooting — that ends when the convoy arrives at a military base. The women are lined up and stripped of their possessions, and a soldier asks if any can cook. A few nervously raise their hands, making anxious bargains for their lives. One woman says she’s a doctor while another says she can sew. The soldier asks the second woman about her sexual abilities instead and then grabs her and rapes her in front of the others. The scene is, in one obvious respect, something of a didactic illustration of rape as an instrument of war, but it’s also undeniably and rightly disturbing. It rattles the movie and you along with it, and it also introduces the idea that war is very much about the violent domination of women and not just about nation-states, ethnic conflicts, historical grudges and men killing men. Ms. Jolie literalizes this theme by bringing Ajla and Danijel together again at the military camp, where he is a commander. He sees her shortly after the other woman is raped, saving Ajla from being similarly assaulted, a decision that has the quality of a moral choice but may in fact be purely mercenary. The question of whether Danijel saves Ajla because he is fundamentally good or because circumstances have made him essentially selfish colors everything that comes after. In a perverse twist made believable by the surrealism of war and by the persuasiveness of the lead performances, Danijel takes Ajla as his lover. He saves her, but doesn’t shield her entirely from the terrors of imprisonment. Time slips away amid small cruelties, brutal assaults and a harrowing passage in which the soldiers use the women as shields during a raid on a Muslim enclave. In this scene, with her cinematographer, Dean Semler, Ms. Jolie manages the tricky feat of creating a chaotically violent vision, in which the focus remains intently on those who, in many war movies, are often an afterthought: the women. This is Ms. Jolie’s directing debut — she also wrote and co-produced the movie — and there’s a somewhat awkward instructional, at times almost proselytizing aspect to the story that seems of a piece with her laudable humanitarian work. That’s especially true in the scenes in which Ms. Jolie switches into full-on expository mode, putting dry, plodding words into the characters’ mouths that would work better in the kind of on-screen textual explanations, with their snippets of history and politics, that open and close the movie. When, for instance, in an early scene, Danijel’s father, a Serbian general (Rade Serbedzija), instructs his son on military matters, he also provides a short history lesson on the region that’s clearly meant for the benefit of those watching the movie. Moments like these pull the movie down and you temporarily out of it. For the most part, though, it moves briskly and easily holds your attention, largely through a perverse love story that doesn’t suffer for being such an obvious metaphor for the larger battle raging beyond Ajla and Danijel’s relationship. Both Ms. Marjanovic and Mr. Kostic are very fine (like the rest of the cast they deliver their dialogue in Bosnian) and they navigate the contradictions of their characters’ feelings, the flashes of hate, the surrender to desire, with delicacy. There’s madness in this relationship. But as the glimpses of the outside world show, particularly in some tough scenes involving Ajla’s sister, Lejla (Vanesa Glodjo), there is madness everywhere. Sam Miguel Innocence Is Trampled, but a Bond Endures By A. O. SCOTT There is no combat in the early scenes of “War Horse,” Steven Spielberg’s sweeping adaptation of the popular stage spectacle, but the film opens with a cinematic assault as audacious and unsparing as the Normandy landing in “Saving Private Ryan.” With widescreen, pastoral vistas dappled in golden sunlight and washed in music (by John Williams) that is somehow both grand and folksy, Mr. Spielberg lays siege to your cynicism, bombarding you with strong and simple appeals to feeling. You may find yourself resisting this sentimental pageant of early-20th-century rural English life, replete with verdant fields, muddy tweeds and damp turnips, but my strong advice is to surrender. Allow your sped-up, modern, movie-going metabolism, accelerated by a diet of frantic digital confections — including Mr. Spielberg’s just-released “Adventures of Tintin” — to calm down a bit. Suppress your instinctive impatience, quiet the snarky voice in your head and allow yourself to recall, or perhaps to discover, the deep pleasures of sincerity. If you can fake that, the old Hollywood adage goes, you’ve got it made. But while “War Horse” is, like so many of Mr. Spielberg’s films, a work of supreme artifice, it is also a self-conscious attempt to revive and pay tribute to a glorious tradition of honest, emotionally direct storytelling. Shot the old-fashioned way, on actual film stock (the cinematographer is Mr. Spielberg’s frequent collaborator Janusz Kaminski), the picture has a dark, velvety luster capable of imparting a measure of movie-palace magic to the impersonal cavern of your local multiplex. An Interview With the “War Horse” Cinematographer Janusz Kaminski The story, in its early chapters, also takes you back to an older — you may well say cornier — style of entertainment. Joey, the fleet-footed, headstrong half-Thoroughbred of the title, is purchased at auction by Ted Narracott (Peter Mullan), a proud and grouchy Devon farmer with a tendency to drink too much. His household includes a loving, scolding wife, Rosie (Emily Watson); a cantankerous goose; and a strapping lad named Albert (Jeremy Irvine), who forms an immediate and unbreakable bond with Joey. The teenage boy trains the horse to pull a plow and together they ride through the stunning scenery. But this pastoral is darkened by memories of war — Ted fought the Boers in South Africa, an experience so terrible he cannot speak of it to his son — and by social divisions. The Narracotts are tenant farmers at the mercy of their landlord (David Thewlis), and if “War Horse” pays tribute to solid British virtues of decency and discipline it also, like a Thomas Hardy novel, exposes the snobbery and economic oppression that are, if anything, even more deeply rooted in that nation’s history. So it is not entirely a simpler, more innocent world that is swept away by the war but rather a way of life whose contradictions are as emphatically presented as its charms. And what follows, as Joey is taken across the English Channel to the battlefields and trenches of Flanders and France, is a nightmare of cruelty that is not without its own sinister magic. Like most movies with an antiwar message, “War Horse” cannot help but be enthralled by the epic scale and transformative power of military conflict. “The war has taken everything from everyone” — the truth of this reckoning, uttered more than once by characters on screen, is self-evident, but it is complicated by the visceral charge and cathartic relief that an effective war movie gives to its audience. The extreme violence of the slaughter in World War I is implied rather than graphically depicted. Mr. Spielberg steps back from the bloody, chaotic naturalism of “Saving Private Ryan” — this is an animal fable for children, after all, with echoes of “E. T.” and Carroll Ballard’s “Black Stallion” — but his ability to infuse action sequences with emotional gravity has hardly diminished. An early battle scene dramatizes the modernization of warfare with remarkable and haunting efficiency. A British cavalry unit attacks a German encampment, charging through the enemy ranks with swords in what appears to be a clean and devastating rout. But then, at the edge of the field, the German machine guns begin to fire, and the British horses crash into the forest, suddenly riderless and instantly obsolete. Joey, who of course never sought out heroism in the first place, is relegated to a life of brutal labor that seems fated to end in an ignoble death. He is kept alive by instinct, human kindness and the companionship of a regal black horse named Topthorn. Joey’s episodic journey takes him from British to German hands and back again, with a sojourn on a French farm owned by an elderly jam-maker (Niels Arestrup) and his young granddaughter (Celine Buckens). Albert, meanwhile, makes his own way to the war, and his and Joey’s parallel experiences — harrowing escapes, the loss of friends, the terror and deprivation brightened by flickers of tenderness or high spirits — give the story texture and momentum, as well as giving Mr. Spielberg an opportunity to show off, once again, his unmatched skill at cross-cutting. (The large cast, mostly British and almost entirely male, acquits itself admirably, with a few moments of maudlin overacting and many more of heartbreaking understatement.) Mr. Spielberg and the screenwriters, Lee Hall and Richard Curtis, have wisely avoided attempting to reproduce the atmosphere and effects of the stage production, in which Joey and the other horses are portrayed by huge puppets. He prefers to translate the tale, which originates in a novel by Michael Morpurgo, into a fully cinematic idiom. And “War Horse” turns out to have a central Spielbergian theme — perhaps the dominant idea in this director’s body of work — namely the fraught and fascinating relationship between the human and the nonhuman. An Interview With Steven Spielberg What do they — sharks, horses, aliens, dinosaurs, intelligent machines — mean to us? What are we supposed to do with them? The boundary can be hard to maintain: sometimes, as in “E. T.” and “A. I.,” nonhuman beings are virtually impossible to distinguish from humans; at other times, as in “Amistad” and “Schindler’s List,” self-evidently human beings are denied that status. Sometimes the nonhuman is a threat, at other times a comfort, but it always presents a profound ethical challenge based in a stark existential mystery: Who are we? Mr. Spielberg’s answers to this question tend to be hopeful, and his taste for happy, or at least redemptive endings is frequently criticized. But his ruthless optimism, while it has helped to make him an enormously successful showman, is also crucial to his identity as an artist, and is more complicated than many of his detractors realize. “War Horse” registers the loss and horror of a gruesomely irrational episode in history, a convulsion that can still seem like an invitation to despair. To refuse that, to choose compassion and consolation, requires a measure of obstinacy, a muscular and brutish willfulness that is also an authentic kind of grace. Sam Miguel From the NY Times Blogs ___ What Do ‘Dragon Tattoo’ and ‘Iron Lady’ Have in Common? Ask the Grousers By MELENA RYZIK It’s time for the holidays and, as ever, it’s time for eggnog recipes and disgruntlement over holiday movies. First up, The Wall Street Journal reports that Margaret Thatcher’s biographers are unhappy with her portrayal – by no less a grande dame than Meryl Streep — in “The Iron Lady.” “I was strongly against the film depicting a living person with dementia,” Charles Moore, Ms. Thatcher’s authorized biographer, told Julie Steinberg of The Journal. He added that it was upsetting for those close to Ms. Thatcher, who, as her daughter revealed in a 2008 memoir, is suffering from Alzheimer’s. “It’s an extremely unkind thing to do,” he said. (Mr. Moore’s book will be published only upon Ms. Thatcher’s death.) Some members of Parliament even called for a House of Commons debate about the movie. Rob Wilson, a Conservative member who is also a parliamentary private secretary to Jeremy Hunt, the culture secretary, called for the debate on “respect, good manners and good taste,” the BBC reported. Mr. Wilson, the BBC reported, saw the film at a private screening – it is to open in Britain next month – and said it was “well made” and “brilliantly acted” but wondered why it had to focus so much on Ms. Thatcher’s frailties. Eva Gabrielsson has issues with “Dragon Tattoo” tie-ins.“It left me wondering about the humanity of the filmmakers who are very subtly denigrating someone who was a great prime minister,” he told the BBC. In other anger news, Eva Gabrielsson, the longtime companion of Stieg Larsson, author of the Lisbeth Salander series, said he wouldn’t have approved of marketing tie-ins to David Fincher’s adaptation of “Girl With the Dragon Tattoo.” The film, which stars Rooney Mara as Lisbeth, has spawned a clothing line at H&M, created by Trish Summerville, the movie’s costume designer, among other tie-ins. “We would never have sold any rights for merchandising,” Ms. Gabrielsson told The Associated Press in Stockholm. “It has nothing to do with books.” Ms. Gabrielsson and Larsson, who died in 2004, were together for more than 30 years but never married; his father and brother inherited the rights to his best-selling series. Ms. Gabrielsson worried that English translations and Hollywood remakes minimized the point that her feminist partner wanted to make, about the prevalence of violence against women. “The oppression of women exists everywhere, this incomprehensible discrimination,” she told The AP. (Fans may know that the Swedish title of the first book in the series translated to “Men Who Hate Women.”) Some rape survivors, too, have taken issue with the H&M line. Natalie Karneef posted an open letter to the retailer, accusing it of “putting a glossy, trendy finish on the face of sexual violence and the rage and fear it leaves behind.” H&M responded with an apology, posted at Fashionista, which read, in part: “We do not view this collection as provocative — it contains pieces that are staples in many people’s wardrobes: jeans, biker jackets and T-shirts. It’s all about how you wear them.” There is always a way to spin a controversy. genom222 12-27-2011, 06:53 PM I thought the last Mission Impossible was really good, full of action and lots of cool gadgets plus great locations. Probably my 2nd favorite in the MI series after MI3. Sam - I really felt like there were not a lot of good movies this year because I could recall only a handful that I watched in the cinema. People are more into downloading movies now which is great because its free. You can download HD films and with a good size TV that should be enough. The drawback there is that when people stop paying to watch movies, producers wont have the money to produce great movies or even come up with the movie itself. For me, it if its a movie that's highly anticipated (like Dark Knight Rises) then I dont mind shelling out a few hundred pesos for IMAX to watch it. Sam Miguel From the LA Times, about as close to Hollywood as one can get ___ Oscar nominations race to pit power players against underdogs Imagine, if you will, a Hollywood version of fantasy football pitting the likes of Margaret Thatcher, J. Edgar Hoover, Marilyn Monroe and F. Scott Fitzgerald in a head-to-head battle with, well, a bunch of nobodies. Daunting, to say the least. Yet these powerful, iconic, often historical figures are likely to be doing just that this film award season, in a competition that squares them off against such characters as a nebbishy lawyer and an illegal immigrant gardener. It seems evident from the start just who will come out on top: Anecdotally, audiences and voters seem to naturally gravitate toward big-screen portrayals of the powerful, the movers and the shakers, and celebrity types. Last year, both groups were moved to put "The King's Speech" up on top at the Academy Awards and at the box office, with a $427.3-million worldwide gross. "'King's Speech' was a double-whammy," says Chris Weitz, director of "A Better Life," which features a man on the lower end of the totem pole — that gardener just mentioned (played by Mexican actor Demián Bichir, who did just pull in a SAG lead actor nomination last week, so perhaps the tide is shifting). "Grand stuff with lovely vistas, nice rooms for people to walk through and big historical events, and a guy who's at a disadvantage. That, as well as Colin [Firth's] amazing performance. You may ask why did he win for that and not 'A Single Man' [the year before]. Well, it has something to do with scale." There are a number of factors that go into the desire to watch the powerful strut their stuff on the screen; Abi Morgan, screenwriter of "The Iron Lady" (the Thatcher story), says there's a voyeuristic appeal on some levels. "It's fascinating to see any historical or public figure off-camera, when they don't know they're being watched," she says. "A good film gives us the sense that we're seeing someone we think we know behind the scenes." Actors leap at these kinds of roles too, says "J. Edgar" screenwriter Dustin Lance Black (who won a 2009 Oscar for "Milk," about another kind of powerful historical figure), because the roles tend to emphasize character over extensive plot: "Any big biopics or stories about great men or great women focus on character rather than story," he says. "It allows the actor to get incredibly specific — there's a focus on them that they don't get in fictional pieces." Does that mean the little guy (or girl) in a film that features an original character in ordinary situations has no chance this time? There's no clear trend: Just two Oscars have gone to films focusing on powerful or real-life individuals since 2000 ("A Beautiful Mind" and "King's Speech"), while the "little guy" pops up in such winners as "Slumdog Millionaire," "Crash" and "American Beauty" in recent years. Actors fare about the same — for every "Speech" (Firth) or "Capote" (Philip Seymour Hoffman) biographical performance winner there's a "Crazy Heart" (Jeff Bridges) and "There Will Be Blood" (Daniel Day-Lewis) fictional role that is honored; actresses do slightly better proportionately in recent years when playing famous or powerful figures, such as "The Queen" (Helen Mirren) and "La Vie en Rose" (Marion Cotillard portraying singer Edith Piaf). One advantage the little, powerless guy may have this year could come from the headlines, which have made much of the 1% versus the 99% in tough economic times. In this climate, it would seem the doors may widen for an undocumented gardener, the "invisible man in America," as Weitz puts it — or even for Paul Giamatti's underdog lawyer in "Win Win." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Get breaking news alerts delivered to your mobile phone. Text BREAKING to 52669. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "I think the little guys have a fighting chance more and more," says "Win" director-writer Thomas McCarthy. "Who are the 99%? What are their stories? But the question now is does anyone want to see them?" Still, films about the big guys come with advantages that are hard to overcome with sheer earnest storytelling. "My Week With Marilyn" director Simon Curtis says, "Audiences come with expectations to films [like "Marilyn"], feeling they've already done the first bit of work by knowing the history behind some of these stories." Such a shortcut, hazards Morgan, is actually a potential problem: "People can think they 'own' a historical character. You have to be able to allow someone [else] to unpack those assumptions for a while." But Letty Aronson, producer of "Midnight in Paris" — which features a bevy of famous literary and artistic greats — points out one reason that could make the whole 99% factor irrelevant: "The people who vote are the 1%," she says with a chuckle. "People are usually attracted to something they identify with in their own lives." Next year may be different, says Black. "We're probably lagging behind just a touch; films next year may speak to those issues. But in troubled economic times like these, people are looking for people to grab the reins and create order. Right now, it's about escapism and finding something larger than us." Either way, whatever films end up in the Oscar nomination hopper, they all have a common theme: Finding the big person in the little guy's story, or the little guy in the big person's history. Regardless of what history — powerful or insignificant — is being told, a script without that layering isn't likely to move voters or audiences. "We're always going to be interested in the little guy because the little guy is us," Morgan says. "If you can't find the little guy in the powerful figure, there's no point in writing. You have to find some basic human connection. That's what we're looking for in a film — everything else is marketing really." Sam Miguel 12-28-2011, 08:37 AM I thought the last Mission Impossible was really good, full of action and lots of cool gadgets plus great locations. Probably my 2nd favorite in the MI series after MI3. Sam - I really felt like there were not a lot of good movies this year because I could recall only a handful that I watched in the cinema. People are more into downloading movies now which is great because its free. You can download HD films and with a good size TV that should be enough. The drawback there is that when people stop paying to watch movies, producers wont have the money to produce great movies or even come up with the movie itself. For me, it if its a movie that's highly anticipated (like Dark Knight Rises) then I dont mind shelling out a few hundred pesos for IMAX to watch it. Maybe when Hollywood stops doing things like paying Tom Cruise $20 million a picture and tickets in our country don't cost P200 a pop then people will stop dowloading free movies, hahaha! Sam Miguel Women of Steel By JULIA BAIRD It had to happen. For female politicians, invoking the name of Margaret Thatcher at a crucial time in your campaign is one of the canniest, most clichéd and most predictable of tactics. What’s surprising about Michele Bachmann is that it took her so long. As America’s “iron lady,” Bachmann told Iowans several times during the run-up to the caucuses, she would “stand up for the free market, stand up for job creation, and turn our economy back round so that we also can have tremendous job growth.” You can turn the economy around, Bachmann says, if you just have “the will and the resolve to do it.” Easy. Now her most recent ads, broadcast at the conclusion of her campaign in Iowa, also claim that Bachmann is not only made of iron, but has a “titanium spine.” It seems unlikely that Bachmann remembers that Thatcher once accused a Conservative colleague of having a spine that did not reach his brain, but who knows? Michele Bachmann is certainly not the first wannabe Margaret Thatcher. The nickname Iron Lady — not so affectionately bestowed by the Soviets — quickly spawned imitations around the world in the 1980s and 1990s, inspiring labels that juxtaposed femininity with strength: the Steel Magnolia, the Iron Butterfly and even, in Australia, the Steel Sheila. In the 1980s, few women could enter politics in western countries without being asked if they were like Margaret Thatcher. The very term “iron lady” reveals a basic discomfort with women in power – they must not be like other women to succeed, they must be like steel, iron, titanium. Just like another great cliché – the iron fist in the velvet glove – metal is somehow encased in the softness of a woman’s body. It’s part of our grand Western tradition of taming, patronizing or marveling at female politicians. Their authority and exercise of power is too often depicted as surprising, secondary, or, in this case, appropriately severe. Toughness and decisiveness, it is implied, do not come naturally to women. The problem is that when most women compare themselves to this Thatcher it is usually a reminder of how unlike her they are. Thatcher was actually a pragmatic world leader who was deeply schooled in free-market philosophy and kept her faith largely private. As a young politician, she did not balk at supporting the legalization of homosexuality, nor at widening access to abortion (she voted for it “under controlled conditions” in the early months). She was not a moral crusader – unlike Bachmann. We also forget that Thatcher was a chemist and a barrister who was in politics for 16 years before leading her party, and 20 before leading the country. Bachmann has served in Congress for five. Thatcher simply outworked and outshone those alongside her. She thrived on work, and was fond of grilling disheveled, tipsy cabinet colleagues at 3 a.m. on some of the finer points of policy. Journalists cooed about her legs and porcelain skin endlessly – Christopher Hitchens described her as surprisingly sexy — but this meant little. One member of her cabinet, John Biffen, described her as a “tigress surrounded by hamsters.” Thatcher won an intellectual battle with a consistently coherent free-market capitalist political philosophy that conflated, defined and rebranded classic liberal ideas in her own name, as Thatcherism: low taxes, low spending, free markets, anti-union, pro-deregulation and privatization. Yet in so many discussions in American politics, Thatcher is described simply as a cartoonishly tough, freakishly successful woman. Now her specter is looming even larger given Meryl Streep’s dazzling performance in the film “The Iron Lady.” In an attempt to humanize her, the film depicts an extraordinarily successful leader as a demented, forlorn and slightly regretful old woman. If Bachmann has seen the movie, she will know that despite Streep’s fine efforts, the film is a travesty, reducing the longest serving British prime minister of the past century to a tetchy political anomaly. As she suffers from dementia, her entire career is viewed through flashbacks of a woman who sees apparitions and hears things. The moments of her greatest triumph – winning the leadership of the Tories in 1975, and her three consecutive election victories – are glossed over or forgotten. She seems merely cranky and determined. In fact, she was stroppy, as the British say — rather belligerent and easily annoyed. The film focuses not on the acuteness of Thatcher’s mental faculties, but the loss of them. So much so that rather than providing an inspiring example of what women can do, it serves as a cautionary tale about women who work, who might in their old age wonder if their families suffered for their now foggily remembered achievements. It was depressing. Bachmann’s bid for the title of Iron Lady is understandable given the desire of the American public for effective, strong leadership at a time of recession, the longstanding love of Republicans for Churchill as well as the fact that we don’t want any politicians to be spineless. “The lady’s not for turning,” Thatcher defiantly told her Conservative colleagues in 1980, when she refused to change course on the economy. But we hardly hanker for a lady who is for turning. Perhaps Bachmann will need to rely on some of the former prime minister’s resolve as the primaries roll on in the coming weeks. “Defeat?” Thatcher said. “I do not recognize the meaning of the word.” Dark Knight Some movies to look forward to this 2012 Ghost Rider : Spirit Of Vengeance The Avengers Madagascar 3 : Europes Most Wanted Ice Age 4 : Continental Drift GI Joe : Retaliation Joescoundrel 01-06-2012, 11:10 AM ^ I'm looking forward to the Avengers movie as well. I'm curious to see if they can oull it off because so far they've pulled off the individual hero stories ably enough. I wonder however who else other than the mainstay Avengers like Thor, Ironman and Captain America will be on the team. They need a woman there, a known mainstay from the comins, and I'm not sure if Wasp or Captain Marvel (not Shazam) or Scarlet Witch are in the works. fujima04 More Movies to look forward in 2012 Source: Read ME 1. The Dark Knight Rises This is the number one most anticipated film on a number of lists on the web at the moment, and with good reason. With the last two Batman films, Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, being such big hits, and with the latter being left on such a cliffhanger, it's no wonder that fans are eager for the conclusion. This one is set eight years after the last. Batman has not surfaced since taking the blame for Harvey Dent's crimes, though he is forced to return after terrorist leader Bane arrives, overwhelming Gotham City and pushing the police force to its limits. 2. The Hunger Games Slated for a March release, The Hunger Games is one of the most talked about films of the moment, it being based on the Suzanne Collins novel of the same name. The movie is set in a dystopian future in the nation of Panem, which lies atop the ruins of what was once North America. The regime randomly selects a boy and a girl between the ages 12 and 18 from each of the 12 districts, and pits them against each other in a ruthless kill-or-be-killed competition until only one is left standing. It should certainly offer as much drama as the harrowing novel does. 3. Skyfall The 23rd James Bond film is set for release this October, following its suspended production throughout 2010 due to film studio MGM's financial problems. Daniel Craig, who has won plenty of acclaim for his performance as the iconic agent, will reprise the role for this film, while Judi Dench is confirmed to take on the role of M once again. Craig has stated that the Skyfall plot will be unrelated to the previous two Bond films, and will instead see 007 question his loyalty to M after the ghost of her past come back to wreak havoc in the present-day MI6. 4. The Avengers Many of the recent Marvel Comics releases (Captain America, Thor, Iron Man) have been setting the scene for this, the movie that will bring these characters together as a super-human fighting force known as SHIELD. Robert Downey Jr. will reprise his role as Tony Stark, meaning that the film is almost guaranteed to have at least one good performance. Much is riding on this super-film, given that the last few Marvel releases have seen lackluster reviews. 5. The Amazing Spider-Man Despite the last Spider-Man film having only wrapped things up in 2007, Hollywood has seen fit to re-boot the franchise and start again, from the moment Peter Parker is bitten by a radioactive spider, with an entirely new cast and crew. In contrast to the lighter tone offered by the previous films, The Amazing Spider-Man promises to be darker in mood, with Peter Parker grappling with the traumas of his past and coming to terms with the responsibilities of possessing his amazing abilities. 6. The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Ever since Peter Jackson's epic Lord of the Rings trilogy ended in 2003, fans and critics have been crying out for a film version of the preceding story, The Hobbit. After much toing and froing, and another director agreeing to joing the project and then dropping out, production began with Jackson at the helm last year. The story follows a younger Bilbo Baggins, played by Marting Freeman, as he joins Gandalf on a new adventure that will change him forever. Much of the production crew from The Lord of the Rings has returned for this film, meaning it should be evry bit as enjoyable as the original trilogy was. 7. Prometheus The premise of Ridley Scott's lastest science fiction epic was originally intended to be a prequel to 1979's Alien, though massive script changes resulted in this film taking a form of its own. Scott has said that the plot will share elements with the Alien universe, though it also has its own mythology to explore. The trailer is particularly sketchy in details, offering only the premise that the crew of the Prometheus are exploring what appears to be the ruins of an extraterrestrial race, uncovering a dark horror that threatens humanity. However, the story pans out, though, it's almost certain that the film will be one of the summer's biggest blockbusters. Dark Knight More Movies to look forward in 2012 Source: Read ME 1. The Dark Knight Rises This is the number one most anticipated film on a number of lists on the web at the moment, and with good reason. With the last two Batman films, Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, being such big hits, and with the latter being left on such a cliffhanger, it's no wonder that fans are eager for the conclusion. This one is set eight years after the last. Batman has not surfaced since taking the blame for Harvey Dent's crimes, though he is forced to return after terrorist leader Bane arrives, overwhelming Gotham City and pushing the police force to its limits. 2. The Hunger Games Slated for a March release, The Hunger Games is one of the most talked about films of the moment, it being based on the Suzanne Collins novel of the same name. The movie is set in a dystopian future in the nation of Panem, which lies atop the ruins of what was once North America. The regime randomly selects a boy and a girl between the ages 12 and 18 from each of the 12 districts, and pits them against each other in a ruthless kill-or-be-killed competition until only one is left standing. It should certainly offer as much drama as the harrowing novel does. 3. Skyfall The 23rd James Bond film is set for release this October, following its suspended production throughout 2010 due to film studio MGM's financial problems. Daniel Craig, who has won plenty of acclaim for his performance as the iconic agent, will reprise the role for this film, while Judi Dench is confirmed to take on the role of M once again. Craig has stated that the Skyfall plot will be unrelated to the previous two Bond films, and will instead see 007 question his loyalty to M after the ghost of her past come back to wreak havoc in the present-day MI6. 4. The Avengers Many of the recent Marvel Comics releases (Captain America, Thor, Iron Man) have been setting the scene for this, the movie that will bring these characters together as a super-human fighting force known as SHIELD. Robert Downey Jr. will reprise his role as Tony Stark, meaning that the film is almost guaranteed to have at least one good performance. Much is riding on this super-film, given that the last few Marvel releases have seen lackluster reviews. 5. The Amazing Spider-Man Despite the last Spider-Man film having only wrapped things up in 2007, Hollywood has seen fit to re-boot the franchise and start again, from the moment Peter Parker is bitten by a radioactive spider, with an entirely new cast and crew. In contrast to the lighter tone offered by the previous films, The Amazing Spider-Man promises to be darker in mood, with Peter Parker grappling with the traumas of his past and coming to terms with the responsibilities of possessing his amazing abilities. Sadly Dark Knight Rises will be the last of the Cris Nolan series. He should make 1 more and feature Manbat and Hush as the villains. I dont think the Hobbit will generate earnings. Im eagerly waiting for Skyfall. I have all the James Bond films and they should BRING back Q for goodness sake. Plus they also should revert to the 60's style Bond complete with painted Bond movie posters. Sean Connery is still the best. Sam Miguel 'John Carter' Loss Expected to Be $200M By Joshua L. Weinstein "John Carter" is now an official flop. The Walt Disney Co. on Monday acknowledged in a statement that the movie's poor performance at the box office likely will force Disney to take a $200 million writedown. The company expects its studio divison will post an operating loss of as much as $120 million in the second fiscal quarter of this year. "John Carter," based on an Edgar Rice Burroughs character, was made for about a quarter-billion dollars;marketing costs were another $100 million on top of that. But the movie grossed only $30.2 million domestically during its first weekend of release, taking in a measly $13.5 million its second. The picture was brighter overseas, grossing around $126 million abroad in the 10 days since its March 9 release. “In light of the theatrical performance of John Carter ($184 million global box office), we expect the film to generate an operating loss of approximately $200 million during our second fiscal quarter ending March 31," the company said in a statement. "As a result, our current expectation is that the studio segment will have an operating loss of between $80 and $120 million for the second quarter." The writedown means "John Carter" is one of history's biggest flops. It rates alongside such stinkers as "Mars Needs Moms," a 2011 movie that cost $150 million to make and grossed $39 million worldwide; "Ishtar," the 1987 disaster that cost $55 million to make and grossed $14 million domestically and "Heaven's Gate," the 3 hour 39 minute 1980 bomb that cost $44 million to make and grossed $3.48 million domestically. Even before "John Carter" arrived in theaters, Hollywood had labeled it a bomb. Early on, there were wide reports that the sci-fi extravaganza had gone over budget and required many costly reshoots. An uninspired trailer only made the situation worse. The costly reshoots, lack of a recognizable star, the director's inexperience with live action -- "John Carter" is director Andrew Stanton's first live-action movie -- and Disney's marketing compounded the problems. Disney's former marketing chief MT Carney exited a few months before the movie's release, leaving it to incoming marketing chief Ricky Strauss to usher the movie into theaters. "John Carter" stars Taylor Kitsch as a Confederate soldier who finds himself transported to Mars, where he becomes involved in an alien war. The movie had long been in development with several filmmakers deeming it unfilmmable before Stanton got the project. Taking the hit, the studio pointed to upcoming movies with presumably happier fates in store. "As we look forward to the second half of the year, we are excited about the upcoming releases of 'The Avengers' and 'Brave,' which we believe have tremendous potential to drive value for the Studio and the rest of the company,” Disney said. Sam Miguel ^^^ John Carter's biggest problem is that it is a remake. Of Scorpion King. Check it out: 1. Big bad-arsed buff good guy who basically is a reluctant hero, who gets forced into being a hero because of his big fluffy do-gooder heart, although he was actually looking to score on abig pay day, played a by a relative unknown in the big epic action hero genre 2. Enigmatic female lead sporting a gratuitously bikini-edition outfit thr entire time she is onscreen, who sort of uses the unwilling hero first to further her own personal agenda but in actuality a huge "big picture" greater good kind of deal 3. Pure evil, seemingly invincible / unbeatable over-the-top bad guy with some sort of special power that must be overcome with not just brawn but brain and big brass balls 4. Lots of sword play over lots of desert, with an oppressed and/or unimportant tribe who later on act as the cavalry for the lead character, led by a chieftain who somehow befriends or becomes a surrogate father for the lead character IT IS THE SAME MOVIE! reforms 03-20-2012, 04:18 PM I just don't get it- John Carter's antagonists, which has god-like powers- were just killed by a bullet. Sam Miguel From the Los Angeles Times ___ Movie review: '21 Jump Street' The only thing "21 Jump Street" takes even remotely seriously is high school. Everything else is punch line material — including the Johnny Depp TV series that was its inspiration and the two undercover police rookies now at its center, played with a great goofball gusto by Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum. As Schmidt (Hill) and Jenko (Tatum), this odd couple is inept from the beginning and ideal for the slap-happy sensibility of co-directors Phil Lord and Christopher Miller. The college filmmaking buddies have turned their off-center humor into a full-time job more innocently with 2009's animated adaptation of kids' book "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs," more provocatively with the mind-melding irreverence of the MTV animated series "Clone High." Miller and Lord clearly understand the push-and-pull and hyper-competitiveness that make guy friendships both complex and stupid. That it comes to life so fully in "21 Jump Street" is what gives the film an endearing, punch-you-in-the-arm-because-I-like-you-man charm. In a slow wind-up that fortunately doesn't last too long, we get a glimpse of the guys in their own high school daze. Schmidt the nerd with bleached hair and braces, Jenko the cool jock with failing grades. A few disappointments later they reconnect during their cop training days, this time joining forces so Schmidt can pass the physical stuff and Jenko the written exams. Once the background business is finally over — including their inglorious bike patrol assignment and a botched arrest — the now best buddies get assigned to 21 Jump Street, an undercover operation housed in the sanctuary of a condemned church with its Korean Jesus above the altar keeping an eye on things and a trash-talking Ice Cube as the captain running the show. For those who don't know the basics of the legendary series that launched Depp, the boys are sent back to high school disguised as students to catch bad guys trying to corrupt kids. Depp's "Street" was more crime-and-punishment drama, though his brow was slightly arched even then. The reimagined "21" is total comic farce, with Schmidt and Jenko assigned to ferret out the supplier of a new designer drug that is incredibly potent — its crazed effect chronicled by one student YouTube style. Written by the very busy Michael Bacall, the quirky mind who had a hand in the current"Project X" nerd party and co-wrote the inventive"Scott Pilgrim vs. the World," "Jump Street" features his peppery sarcasm and his trademark fourth-wall breaking antics with pop-art splashes dropped in as commentary/context for fun. As fate and the filmmakers would have it, Jenko and Schmidt are assigned to the very high school they graduated from, which means a second chance to do things differently. Always the jokester, Jenko switches their identities during their meet-and-greet with the principal, with Jenko playing the science nerd and Schmidt the track star and drama club king. Oh, and they're supposed to be brothers, which means they move back in with Schmidt's mom and dad. Tatum and Hill turn out to be even better partners than Jenko and Schmidt. Though Tatum is rock hard and Hill is squishy soft, both bring a kind of vulnerability to their characters that makes whatever mayhem they are up to OK. Hill, in particular, knows how to swing between pretension and panic with the greatest of ease. Those qualities serve to bring an unexpected introspection as the guys rewind and replay their high school experience with all the ego and angst of the first time, and theoretically the wisdom of age. Just about everything on the teen issue checklist turns up at some point — the out-of-control party, the cute girl (Brie Larson) whom Schmidt wants to take to the prom, the cool dude (Dave Franco) who deals on the side, and all the big, bad bruisers the boys are supposed to take down. That the school play that Schmidt tries out for is"Peter Pan"is not a random choice. Indeed there are sly, knowing references scattered throughout the film that reward you for paying attention even as lunacy and total anarchy unfold. Which brings us to the freewheeling action excesses that director of photography Barry Peterson ("Starsky & Hutch") captures with such comic verve. As Jenko and Schmidt struggle with their shifting emotions and the pressures that the high school role-playing puts on their relationship, the conflicts nearly always trigger some kind of major action episode with wild car chases, shootouts and a lot of wrestling of the exceedingly awkward sort that boys do. But then things never quite turn out as planned for this bumbling pair, which is actually just fine. Sam Miguel ^^^ We had Miami Vice, The A Team, and now 21 Jump Street. I wonder when we will have The Equalizer? Sam Miguel From the Los Angeles Times ___ 'The Hunger Games' fuels Hollywood's appetite for North Carolina From “Blue Velvet” to “Bull Durham,” North Carolina has a long filmmaking tradition. With the release of this weekend’s much-anticipated debut of “The Hunger Games,” state film officials are hoping the state will re-emerge as one of the top shooting destinations outside of California. The post-apocalyptic tale based on the first of three bestselling novels by Suzanne Collins is expected to be one of the highest grossing movies of the year -- a major selling point for the state that hosted the production last summer. “The Hunger Games,” starring Jennifer Lawrence, is one of the biggest productions North Carolina has hosted. With the film’s budget exceeding $80 million, Santa Monica studio Lionsgate spent an estimated $60 million in the state, employing 180 crew members and more than 4,000 extras. “This is going to impact us in the way that ‘Dirty Dancing’ and ‘The Last of the Mohicans’ did,” said Aaron Syrett, director of the North Carolina Film Office. “It shows the industry that North Carolina can handle these large films and that we have the talent and resources to make it work.” The film office has wasted no time taking advantage of the hype surrounding the Lionsgate movie, sending out an email blast to filmmakers proudly touting the locations used in “The Hunger Games.” Over four months last summer, the crew filmed throughout the Charlotte area, including at an old cotton mill outside of Hildebran that was transformed into a coal-mining village that is home to the movie’s heroine, Katniss Everdeen. They also shot at a former Philip Morris cigarette manufacturing plant in Concord and in the dense forest areas near Asheville and Black Mountain that served as the backdrop for “The Hunger Games,” in which teenagers fight to the death on live television. “The Hunger Games” contributed to North Carolina having a record year for production in 2011, generating $220 million in film and TV spending, up from $75 million in 2010. Other productions in the state included such TV series as Showtime’s “Homeland” and the CW's young adult drama “One Tree Hill,” as well as several movies, among them “Journey 2: The Mysterious Island,” which filmed partially in Wilmington. This year, North Carolina will host another big film, Marvel Studios’ “Iron Man 3,” starring Robert Downey Jr. The production, which will soon begin filming, is expected to spend $80 million in the state. North Carolina’s film office attributes the increase in activity mainly to the decision by the state legislature to beef up its film tax credit in January of last year. The state, which offers a 25% refundable tax credit on qualified production expenses, increased the cap on how much individual projects could receive to $20 million from $7 million. Although North Carolina provided ideal locations for “The Hunger Games,” the film tax credit was a key factor, said Todd Christensen, the movie's location manager, who also worked on the Oscar-nominated picture “Moneyball,” which filmed in California. “They hadn’t done a big film in North Carolina for some time, but they had a great attitude toward us as a film crew and letting us do what we needed to do,” Christensen said. In the 1980s and early 1990s, North Carolina was one of the busiest states for filming outside of California and New York, thanks to a string of movies including the baseball drama “Bull Durham” and Academy Award-winner “The Last of the Mohicans,” which filmed in the Pisgah National Forest among other locations. Despite its reputation for being film friendly and a so-called right-to-work state where non-union crews are welcomed, North Carolina lost its competitive edge when Canadian provinces and other states such as Georgia and Louisiana began to grab larger shares of the business by offering generous film tax credits. Now the state is enjoying a comeback, industry officials say. “The industry is seeing us as a serious filmmaking state,’’ said Bill Vassar, an executive vice president of EUE/Screen Gems, which operates a 10-stage production facility in Wilmington that will be rented to Marvel for “Iron Man 3.” “It’s elevating us again.” Sam Miguel From the New York Times ___ Review: 'The Hunger Games' a Winning Story of Sacrifice and Survival When you're talking about "The Hunger Games," it all comes down to Katniss. Like other strong-minded women who have driven book sales into the stratosphere — think Lisbeth Salander of the "Dragon Tattoo" triology and even Bella Swan of the "Twilight" series — ace archer Katniss Everdeen is an indomitable heroine whom nothing fazes or flusters for long. Making a successful "Hunger Games" movie out of Suzanne Collins' novel required casting the best possible performer as Katniss, and in Jennifer Lawrence director Gary Ross and company have hit the bull's-eye, so to speak. An actress who specializes in combining formidable strength of will with convincing vulnerability, Lawrence is the key factor in making "Hunger Games" an involving popular entertainment with strong narrative drive that holds our attention by sticking as close to the book's outline as it can manage. As those who've seen Lawrence's Oscar-nominated work in "Winter's Bone" know, playing Ree Dolly in that film gave the actress a head start on Katniss. Not only was Ree similarly determined and intrepid, she paralleled Katniss in growing up poor in blighted surroundings and having to head the family after the departure of her father hampered her mother's ability to cope. Ree's story, however, was set in the present, while Katniss' tale unfolds in a bleak future where a nation called Panem exists where the United States once stood. Every year, to mark the anniversary of a peace treaty that ended a bloody rebellion, each of Panem's districts has to send one boy and one girl between the ages of 12 and 18, known as tributes, to the Capitol to participate in a brutal kill-or-be-killed event called the Hunger Games. Only one child comes out alive. "This is how we remember our past," intones the official propaganda for this, the 74th annual games, set in a sizable wooded area that functions as an outdoor arena. "This is how we safeguard our future." So that no one misses the message, numerous concealed cameras turn the Hunger Games into the ultimate in must-see TV for Panem's residents. Collins came up with the idea for "Hunger Games" while switching between a reality TV show and coverage of the Iraq war. And the finished film, though it combines elements familiar from short stories "The Lottery" and "The Most Dangerous Game," does come off as a lethal "Survivor" or even"American Idol" with deadly weapons. In District 12, where coal mining is a way of life and the people dress like characters from "The Grapes of Wrath,"16-year-old Katniss is primarily concerned with getting food for her family and bonding with her hunky best friend, Gale Hawthorne (Liam Hemsworth). But when her 12-year-old sister gets chosen as a tribute, Katniss impulsively volunteers to take her place and heads off to the Capitol clutching a pin in the shape of a mockingjay (the visual symbol of both book and film) as a good luck charm. On the train to the Capitol, Katniss exchanges glances with Peeta Mellark (Josh Hutcherson), her fellow District 12 tribute, and spends quality time with key players like the ebullient Effie Trinket (an unrecognizable Elizabeth Banks) and the inebriated Haymitch Abernathy (Woody Harrelson), a former champion who is supposed to mentor both Peeta and Katniss. At the Capitol, an effete, decadent place that looks like a 1930s image of futuristic architecture, more characters materialize, including Stanley Tucci's foppish host and Lenny Kravitz's sensitive pageant stylist. Preliminaries out of the way, the games begin with roughly an hour gone and 90 minutes left on the clock. Since what happens during the Hunger Games should stay in the Hunger Games, specifics of the combat will not be revealed here, except to mention the presence of young actress Amandla Stenberg, who makes a powerful impression as 12-year-old Rue. Though the film is faithful to the book, the trio of practiced screenwriters (Ross, who has a trio of Oscar script nominations, author Collins and Billy Ray) have made some changes. The biggest one is elimination of the book's first-person structure, which allows for scenes — such as private conversations between President Snow (Donald Sutherland) and head gamemaker Seneca Crane (Wes Bentley) — that were not in the novel. Ross also makes the shrewd choice to have us frequently glimpse the unfolding games action on the huge TV screens the citizens of Panem are watching, enhancing the uncomfortable intertwining of violence and voyeurism that is one of the story's themes. As to the kid-on-kid violence that has been the subject of so much talk, Ross has managed to adroitly downplay that, keeping the mayhem to a PG-13 level. Most of the children in the film want nothing to do with killing, and the ones who do look considerably older than the heroines of previous ultra-violent films like "Hanna" and "Kick-Ass." Katniss, of course, is one of the reluctant participants, and Lawrence's ability to involve us in her struggle is a key to the effectiveness of "Hunger Games." The film's strengths are not so much in its underlying themes or its romantic elements, (the weakest aspect, in fact) but its recognition of the book's narrative strengths and its ability play them straight. If, as the ads suggest, the whole world will be watching this, viewers will likely be satisfied with what they see. Sam Miguel 03-22-2012, 08:42 AM From the Los Angeles Times ___ Jack Kirby, the Abandoned Hero of Marvel’s grand Hollywood adventure, and his Family’s Quest You’d be hard-pressed to find a recent comic book that didn’t have the stylish scrawl of the artists somewhere on the cover, but that was not the case when Jack Kirby was making pop culture history back in the 1960s with his wildly kinetic drawings of the X-Men, Hulk and the Fantastic Four. “I think I have a highly unique and unusual style, and that’s the reason I never sign my drawings,” the proud Kirby told an interviewer in 1987, seven years before his death. “Everybody could tell any of my covers a mile away on the newsstand, and that satisfied me.” The satisfaction was fleeting. The artist may be reverently referred to as “King” Kirby by the pop scholars and younger artists who celebrate his genre-defining work but Kirby is, in some ways, an overlooked figure in the broader view of American culture. He didn’t live to see his creations fly across the movie screen over the last decade and his four children made nothing from those lucrative films, although they are now pursuing legal action to claim some of the future Hollywood wealth. “There is,” daughter Lisa Kirby says, “a bittersweet legacy to my father’s work.” On a recent afternoon, in Beverly Hills, a different man was autographing a giant lithograph reproducing one of Kirby’s classic Fantastic Four covers. It was Stan Lee, the writer who was Kirby’s most famous collaborator until they became estranged over creative credit, artwork custody and money. An art dealer had brought stacks of limited-edition lithos, some to be priced at $850, to Lee’s Santa Monica Boulevard office along with a check in his pocket to pay the 86-year-old Lee for his autographs. Lee had written the stories for the classic comics, of course, but considering all the history, it was still odd to see his name etched on the cosmic Kirby tableau from 1966. “Yes, there was a time when there was some hard feeling on his part ... but he got over that and we were friends,” Lee said. “It really is sad that he didn’t get to see all the big movies. None of us could predict that we would get to this point with the films. I don’t dwell on it too much because I’m always so busy doing what I am doing today. Unfortunately the guys back in the day did not make as much as they do today. Years ago also you had artists doing these comics who, well, there was nothing else they could have done. Their style wasn’t right for advertising or magazines like Saturday Evening Post or Collier’s. And as for us writers, well, we weren’t qualified to write for the New Yorker. Comic book writers were considered hacks, and artists weren’t really thought of as much beyond that.” Lee studied one of the other art pieces, a dazzling revisiting of a Kirby cover for Captain America. “Wow, look at this one.” The pieces are being sold by the Santa Monica gallery called Every Picture Tells a Story as part of a new licensing deal with Marvel to create high-end wall art from illustrations that were, in their day, the most gaudy and disposable entertainment imaginable. “As far as I’m concerned,” Lee said with his endless zeal, “it is fine art.” The story of two “hacks,” as Lee would frame it, will be scrutinized much more considering recent events. Last month, the Walt Disney Co. paid $4 billion to scoop up Marvel Entertainment and its vault of florid characters who over the last decade have become Hollywood box-office heroes. Many of the most valuable properties in that vault were created by the wildly prolific tandem of Lee and Kirby in the 1960s; there are two big-budget movies now in the pipeline for Marvel Studios that are based on Lee-Kirby creations (“The Mighty Thor“ and “The Avengers”) and a third (“First Avenger: Captain America”) based on the work of Kirby and writer Joe Simon. The Kirby brood watched the Disney deal happen and within days were conferring with attorneys and accelerating their bid to reclaim copyright. A day after Lee sat signing that artwork, attorneys representing the four children of Kirby sent out 45 notices of termination to Hollywood studios and players with an interest in assorted Marvel films; it was the opening salvo in a legal battle to gain copyright control of certain characters and the name on the legal letterhead was Toberoff & Associates, the same firm that last year won a intriguing victory by reclaiming a share of the copyright for the first Superman story for heirs of that character’s co-creator, Jerry Siegel. Under copyright law, creators or their heirs can seek to regain copyrights they previously assigned to a company 56 years after first publication, so the Kirby family is starting that process now with hopes of gaining an interest or, perhaps, a settlement. Lee, meanwhile, struck assorted deals through the years with Marvel and has been an executive producer on every Marvel film made to date, movies with worldwide box office now in the billions of dollars, and has had prominent cameos in many of them. Lee is by far the most famous creator in comics history thanks to his longevity, success and a Barnum-like flair for self-promotion. He became a media figure in the 1960s when journalists jotted down his dizzying hyperbole about Marvel’s brightly hued, counterculture ethos. Kirby, laboring at home with far less credit, looked on and chafed about his status as a freelancer, essentially working for Lee, whose family connections by then had taken him to the top of the small and scruffy publishing venture. By 1970, Kirby had had enough and defected to rival DC Comics. Lee would go on to accumulate considerable wealth and fame, sometimes selling comics, sometimes selling his own persona with a long list of splashy but short-lived ventures. Kirby’s fortunes were not as grand; when he talked about his old creations he had the weary tone of a man who long ago watched the family coin collection scatter on a crowded street. Lee knows that fans like to set up the partners as rivals. Kirby is portrayed as the irascible purist with staggering imagination and Lee reduced to the tireless huckster — the pop-culture prophet versus the corporate profiteer. From Lee’s present vantage point, though, he prefers to look back on their shared tale as the unexpected odyssey of two kids who grew up in a business of cruel deadlines and lowbrow aspirations and found in each other a go-to guy. “My favorite thing about Kirby’s artwork was his storytelling,” Lee said. “He was really a film director doing comics.” In that, Kirby was certainly ahead of his time. Comics are a huge part of Hollywood now, thanks to the modern era of computer-generated special effects that, finally, can match the galactic visions and super-powered mayhem that Kirby put to paper in the 1960s. Kirby’s influence is nothing less than massive on several generations of artists and filmmakers. “There was power in the work of Jack Kirby that changed the way I looked at things,” said Guillermo del Toro, writer-director of “Pan’s Labyrinth.” “There was no one else like him and there never will be.” Nevertheless, Kirby remains a distant second to Lee in name recognition, which Lisa Kirby said rankles. “A lot more people know the name Stan Lee than the name Jack Kirby,” she said. “I’m not putting down Stan Lee’s talents but it’s difficult for us to see that he does dominate the credit. That doesn’t reflect the work or the reality. To see Jack Kirby in small letters and Stan Lee in big letters, that’s hard for us.” Mike Richardson grew up under the thrall of Kirby’s drawings and was inspired to found his own comic-book company, Dark Horse, which has grown into a Hollywood player after seeing titles such as “The Mask,” “Hellboy” and “300“ jump to the screen. Through the years, he reached out to the Kirby family to help them find some sort of compensation. “There was a lot of anger in the Kirby family with the way that Jack was treated, more than they will express in public,” Richardson said. “There’s no way you can say enough about the impact of those Marvel comics in the 1960s. They changed the rules. Lee and Kirby were the Lennon and McCartney of comics and Stan Lee became a well-known figure in popular culture and Jack did not. Neither were as great on their own, it’s true, but Jack had decades of work that was really special. To me, there’s no doubt that Jack Kirby was the truly brilliant creative genius behind the success of Marvel.” If there’s a battle to come, it’s one Kirby never took on in life. “Jack didn’t have the resources or the stomach lining to fight Marvel over copyrights, character ownership or past contractual sleights that he believed he suffered,” says Mark Evanier, who was Kirby’s assistant in the early 1970s and later his biographer. “He fought to get back his pages of original art. That was the fight he believed he could win.” Evanier, now a comics historian and creator, testified in the Siegel suit and it seems certain that he would be in the deposition seat for any Kirby legal case. A longtime friend to Kirby and respectful acquaintance of Lee, he spoke glowingly of the partnership as lightning in a bottle, the zenith of each man’s career. Kirby contributed mightily to the plots and character creation; the workload at Marvel was so intense in the 1960s that there were no “scripts” handed to Kirby, he would just draw the story and Lee would go back and craft dialogue that fit the action. Still, Evanier said, while it’s now fashionable to view Lee as the lesser figure, he also had the separate success of Spider-Man (with artist Steve Ditko) and set the singular tone and culture of Marvel. The pair had met in the Roosevelt years. In late 1940, Jacob Kurtzberg, 23, drawing under the name Kirby, had his first taste of real success in the young comics industry, which soared after the debut of Superman in 1938. Kirby and writer Simon’s Captain America was a hit for Timely Comics, which would later morph into Marvel. There was an eager assistant in the office named Stanley Lieber, just 18, who had gotten the job through a family connection (and would later shorten his name). “In those days they dipped the pen in ink, I had to make sure the inkwells were filled,” said Lee. “I went down and got them their lunch, I did proofreading, I erased the pencils from the finished pages for them. Whatever had to be done. I remember Jack would always be sitting at a table puffing on his cigar, kind of talking to himself as he was doing those pages.” Lee’s first credited work was a 1941 Captain America story where the hero threw his shield for the first time. That would become a trademark for decades, suggesting an instant flair for the medium. Kirby left Timely not long after. Years later, with comics in the doldrums, Lee and Kirby would reunite and create a new sort of comic book, with frenetic energy, mutant outsiders and misunderstood monsters. Superman and DC Comics instantly seemed like boring old Pat Boone; Marvel felt like the Beatles and the British Invasion. It was Kirby’s artwork with its tension and psychedelia that made it perfect for the times — or was it Lee’s bravado and melodrama, which was somehow insecure and brash at the same time? “Jack was the best partner you could ask for, dependable and imaginative,” Lee said, sitting in an office cluttered with all those old heroes and villains. “And it was never dull. Nothing with us was ever dull.” Sam Miguel 03-22-2012, 08:44 AM ^^^ In the era of the blockbuster superhero movie, Jack Kirby may finally get his due, or at least his family. I certainly hope Stan Lee and the new Marvel-Hollywood Axis give due credit and show the money for the heirs of Kirby. Without him there would really be no Marvel Universe to begin with. Comis AND film are all the better because of Kirby. His family deserves now what Kirby never got in life. Joescoundrel From MSN Movies - - - ‘Snow White and the Huntsman’ director: Disney Turned us Down Snow White has undergone many makeovers since her Brothers Grimm incarnation in 1812, and none persists in the American imagination of today more than Walt Disney’s warbling beauty. But “Snow White and the Huntsman” gives the raven-haired princess a treatment far bleaker than the current rival versions in “Mirror Mirror” and “Once Upon A Time.” A five-minute trailer, which aired Saturday at WonderCon, teases a dark epic in which Kristen Stewart and Chris Hemsworth, who play the film’s title characters, and a band of dwarfs lead a battle against Charlize Theron’s evil queen. It’s a bold feature film debut for director Rupert Sanders, whose previous work is primarily commercial. Hero Complex writer Noelene Clark caught up with Sanders to talk about the film’s magic, mythology and star power. NC: We see such a bleak world in the new trailer for “Snow White and the Huntsman.” Can you tell us about creating this particular brand of dark magic? RS: I wanted to make a big, epic medieval film with lots of knights in shining armor. I used to love history books as a kid, and so I was really kind of creating those massive films, and then within that, I wanted to create a sense of believable magic, so this is a world where people believed that the dark forest was inhabited by creatures. It’s not a fantasy movie, it’s definitely a fairy tale movie, but kind of that was the time when people felt these things existed. NC: You make a distinction between fairy tale and fantasy. How would you say they’re different? RS: Fantasy, to me, I think is anything goes. The world is fantastic; it’s not a real world. Whereas ours is a real world where magical things happen and people believe in them. It’s much more historic, I think. Our world, for all intents and purposes, could have happened in 1480 when they believed that these things existed. And that was where most of these stories came from — in that period in the Middle Ages. Whereas fantasy, to me, it never existed; it’s a parallel world. This is our world, as it was in that time. Charlize Theron in a movie poster for "Snow White and the Huntsman." (Universal Pictures) NC: Charlize Theron seems a terrifying as the evil Queen Ravenna. How did you develop this villain? RS: I think what we really tried to do is make her a realistic character. It’s a hard character to play because everyone has their perception of what the evil queen is and what the villain should do, but I think what was great about what Charlize wanted to do, is she wanted to find a very believable, very realistic, very wounded character. People who are wounded are much more dangerous. You look at nature, people who are protecting their young, or an animal that is wounded is far more vicious and violent than something that is just strong. And I think that she found this incredible pain within herself that made the brutality of what she was doing far more resonant. NC: And Kristen Stewart is your Snow White. RS: She’s quite stunning. She’s really good. First thing I saw her in was probably “Panic Room,” and then I saw her in “The Runaways” and “Into the Wild.” She’s an incredibly talented actor. I think a lot of people think that she’s Bella Swan because she played that part so well, and she really epitomized that character from the books. She was really strict with herself that she’d wear brown contacts, which is hard to act with those things in, because so much is coming from the eyes, but that’s what Bella Swan had. She’s very serious about what she does, and she’s incredibly gifted, and she’s incredibly intuitive, and she’ll just try different things. It was great to work with her. She’s a very one-of-a-kind actor. NC: We’re familiar with Chris Hemsworth from his performance in “Thor” and the upcoming “Avengers” movie. You’ve said that he delivers a very emotional performance in “Snow White.” RS: When I saw “Thor,” I thought, you know, he’s got the charm, he’s got the presence, he’s got the physicality. But when I met him, he’s got this kind of great broodingness to him. He’s got this amazing deep voice. He sounds like Morgan Freeman or something. He’s just so versatile, and he loves this kind of film. This is the kind of film he grew up on. He’s endlessly talking about “Legend” and “The Dark Crystal” and “Labyrinth” and all the fantasy films he loves. There are a couple of scenes where he has to really go there, and he’s totally willing to bare his soul, which is rare to find all those things — I call it the beauty of the Australian actor, because they have the British training and the American diet. He’s massive and muscle-y, but he’s as good of an actor as some of those British actors. He’s kind of got it all, Chris. He’s a lucky man, and he’s very busy because of it. NC: I understand the eight dwarfs in your film are different than previous incarnations of the classic characters. Can you tell us a little about your dwarf mythology? RS: They’re not called Happy, Grumpy, Sneezy and Dopey. In our film, they used to noble gold miners because they could see light in the darkness, and they see that light in Snow White. But while they were down in the caves, the Queen took over, and when they came up, the land was blackened, and all of their tribe was lost. So they’ve lost everything, and they’ve become highwaymen, basically. So they meet our characters by trying to rob them. They basically beat the … out of both of them, and lynch them, and then try to take all their money. And then she kind of bonds them together, and they all go off together and continue the journey. NC: And your dwarfs are portrayed by an incredible lineup of British actors, including Nick Frost. RS: We’ve got Bob Hoskins, Ian McShane, Ray Winstone, Toby Jones, Eddie Marsan, Johnny Harris and Brian Gleeson — really amazing. Another actor I think is stunning in the film, who really plays more of the villain, ironically, than the Queen, is her younger brother. He’s called Sam Spruell, who plays Finn, who’s the one with white hair. He’s incredible. I saw him in a small British gangster movie called “London to Brighton,” and I was like, I gotta get that guy. He’s stunning in it. NC: In the five-minute WonderCon trailer (below), we hear the Queen’s mirror telling her to consume Snow White’s heart. Is the mirror a major character? RS: Really, it’s in her mind. There’s a scene where Finn’s watching her from the shadows, and we see the mirror pour out, and it starts to talk to her, and she’s ranting at it. And then we cut to Finn, and we see his point of view, and there’s nothing there. The mirror has so much psychological background to it. It’s great to play with those themes. He is ultimate truth; he’s telling it like it is. He scares her, and he excites her. He’s a great character. NC: Have you received any pushback from Disney? RS: It’s not their property. They can whistle as loud as they like. Ironically, we went to Disney first with the project. They didn’t want it. It’s not owned by Disney. It’s public domain. There is no copyright. There are things they did to the story that are Disney, but the story is for everyone, which is great. So I haven’t heard from Walt. NC: “Snow White” seems to be undergoing a pop culture revival with “Once Upon A Time” and “Mirror Mirror.” What sets your film apart? RS: I think you go to a gallery and see a lot of different paintings, and they’re all different. I think ours is very different from all of those things. I think ours has a massive scale to it. I think it has a very rich, emotional web to it. There’s a lot of times people cry when they watch the film, which I’m very happy with. And there’s a lot times when they’re like, “Holy … !” It’s very intense, the world comes at you, and you’re like, “Whoa!” I really try to immerse people in that world and put them right in the thick of it. I think it’s a lot visceral and a lot more grounded than the other renditions. NC: Is it too scary or heavy for kids? Would you say it’s a family film? RS: It is a family movie. It’s intense. I think it’s great — a lot of people who’ve watched it are like, “I really want to show this to my kids, because I really believe it’s something they should think about.” I wouldn’t bring, like, a 3-year-old. I mean, my kids are 5 and 7, and they’ve seen most of it. I was read those stories at that age, and it terrified me. Look, it’s gonna scare them, but it’s gonna excite them. Maybe sit in an aisle seat. Joescoundrel From the LA Times - - - 'Hunger Games' to Deliver more than $300 million in Profit to Lions Gate The blockbuster opening weekend of "The Hunger Games" — which debuted with an estimated $155 million — will ultimately lead to more than $300 million in profit for independent studio Lionsgate, analysts predicted Sunday. And with three sequels to come, the franchise as a whole is expected to deliver $1.5 billion or more to the Santa Monica company's bottom line. That's a significant success for Lionsgate, which has posted net losses in its last four fiscal years and struggled to up its game in film production. While it has scored with a variety of genre and prestige pictures like "Saw" and "Precious" and has a growing television division, the studio last year took losing bets on several high-profile flops, including "Conan the Barbarian" and the Taylor Lautner action-thriller "Abduction." Media analyst Monica Dicenso of JP Morgan predicted that the first "Hunger Games" film will produce $310 million in profit and the series as a whole will generate $1.5 billion. James Marsh of Piper Jaffray said the numbers could be even higher, with more than $400 million from the first movie and $2-billion-plus for the entire series. This weekend's release, which cost a little more than $80 million to make (after a tax break) and $45 million more to market, needed to reach about $100 million in domestic box office receipts to break even, according to a person familiar with the picture’s economics who was not authorized to speak publicly. The picture reached that milestone on Saturday. The ultimate success of the franchise will depend largely on how the movie performs on DVD when it's no longer in theaters as well as the sales of licensed products. Lionsgate vice chairman Michael Burns noted Sunday that he had just received an email informing him that "Hunger Games" T-shirts were already selling out in many Hot Topic chain stores. "The panacea in the movie business is to find franchises," he said when asked to reflect on the meaning of "The Hunger Games" to the studio, which he and chief executive Jon Feltheimer have run since 2000. "The idea that we can create some predictability around the most unpredictable part of our business is fantastic," he added. There are several factors in Lions Gate's favor that should help the company generate even higher profits from the sequels than the first film. The movie's international opening, for instance, was solid but not spectacular, particularly outside of the English-speaking world, where author Suzanne Collins' "Hunger Games" novels are not as well known. Just as the popular"Twilight" sequels did much better overseas than the original, the same might hold true for Lionsgate's new franchise. In addition, with the success of the first film, Lionsgate will be in a position to demand more favorable terms from foreign distributors for the sequels. The independent studio does not handle the release of its movies outside of the U.S. and Great Britain. One challenge the company faces, however, is the pending departure of motion picture group president Joe Drake. While Feltheimer gave the movie the greenlight, it was Drake and his team who oversaw the development, production and marketing. Drake and several of his key executives are being replaced by the team from "Twilight" studio Summit Entertainment, which Lionsgate acquired in January. Lions Gate stock has more than doubled in value since September in part because of anticipation for "The Hunger Games" (as well as the exit of dissident shareholder Carl Icahn). The shares closed at $14.53 on Friday. But with the movie outperforming even the most optimistic expectations this weekend, they could rise again Monday. Sam Miguel From the Los Angeles Times ___ Girl Power: Hollywood's Young Heroines Come to their own Rescue Not without fanfare, Katniss Everdeen has taken her place in a pop culture lineage of new millennial vintage. Like Harry Potter and Bella Swan before her, the protagonist of “The Hunger Games” transfers from the pages of young-adult fiction to the big screen as nothing less than a pre-engineered box-office phenomenon. And as with all such YA juggernauts, the merits of the first adaptation of novelist Suzanne Collins’ trilogy are debatable (and for many fans, beside the point). Less in doubt is Katniss’ place at the forefront of a growing number of movie characters who happen to be tough young women and who don’t need to be rehabilitated for it. From the no-nonsense muscularity of her name to her peerless skills as an archer, Katniss (portrayed by Jennifer Lawrence) is an avatar of strength and purpose — without the once-requisite “for a girl” qualifiers. That’s no small thing in an age of Kardashians as role models (one of Collins’ most penetrating conceptions is the way “Hunger Games” pushes reality-TV inanity to the darkest extreme), or at a time when even educated people still use such antediluvian phrases as “woman doctor.” It also marks the stirrings of a potential sea change for Hollywood, which in recent decades has tended to punish female independence or temper it with the ribbons and bows of romantic bliss. Even among the frillier and more tradition-steeped elements of this emerging band of heroines, girls are engaging in hand-to-hand combat as they take on injustice, hypocrisy and all-around evil. Whether they’re ordinary girls thrust into extraordinary circumstances or princesses cast out of the castle, they’re not waiting for a shiny-armored knight to save the day. No less an iconic princess than Snow White is flexing muscle in her latest big-screen incarnations, one of which finds Kristen Stewart transitioning from Bella’s mooning and swooning in the “Twilight” series — essentially a Gothicized romance novel — to an action hero. They’re in works of disparate tone, but Lily Collins’ Snow White in the recently released “Mirror Mirror” and the one played by Stewart in the upcoming “Snow White and the Huntsman” are both evolutionary leaps from the folk-tale character’s angelic passivity. Righteous and wronged, Grimm’s Snow White spends a considerable length of time preserved in a glass coffin — “as still as a gold piece,” as the poet Anne Sexton described her. Such suspended animation is not a viable option for Katniss, who’s forced into gladiatorial combat. But even for characters facing less violent coming-of-age struggles, sitting pretty is not an option. The headstrong teen at the center of the summer release “Brave,” a cartoon princess who’s also an archer, will do nothing less than “challenge destiny to change her fate.” And in “Pennyroyal’s Princess Boot Camp,” a kids’ fantasy book optioned for the screen by Reese Witherspoon, girls learn to be warriors, the better to battle a coven of wicked witches. No doubt they’re picking up the fiery baton of grass-roots grrl power, but rocking a crinoline and tiara isn’t enough for today’s princesses. In our fictions, if not in our tabloids, to be blinged out is to be less than genuine. Katniss, a character defined by her unwavering inner compass and not her appearance, stands in opposition to those who worship at the church of fashionable conformity and celebrity-branded consumerism. It’s not merely because she lacks the means to indulge, but because she has the intelligence and self-possession to see through the vanity. The garishly girlie Effie Trinket is her antithesis. Humanized on the pages of “Hunger Games,” she’s a gargoyle of a government stooge in Gary Ross’ film, portrayed by Elizabeth Banks with the frenzied emptiness that puts Katniss’ old soul in sharp relief. These girls grow up fast. “Huntsman” costume designer Colleen Atwood has said that her guiding concept was “someone who is tough and who had had a journey already at a very young age.” That notion of hard-earned wisdom so early in life is the essence of Katniss Everdeen, a character famously summarized by another as “sullen and hostile.” It’s hardly an unusual description for a 16-year-old girl, but the particulars of Katniss’ situation turn an intended insult into a compliment of the highest order. How else would a thinking, feeling person respond to the realities of a brutal authoritarian state and a devastated home front? Katniss’ unsentimental edge is her most striking quality, more so in Collins’ books than in the first installment of the four-movie franchise. She’s a hunter, in sync with nature, her instinct for survival a rebuke to the cruelty of the man-made world. But although she’s guarded, she hasn’t lost the capacity for kindness. Her maternal side — though she would cringe to hear it described that way — is expressed primarily in her tenderness toward younger children, not in a fussy way but with a sturdiness that’s grounded and reassuring. It’s one of Katniss’ chief strengths and surely her most poignant. Like the Ozark teen Lawrence played in “Winter’s Bone,” she had to step into the void left by the loss of a father and a mother’s inability to cope. She does it without complaint, even as she’s fueled by anger. She possesses a marrow-deep understanding of the rottenness that surrounds her and is understandably wary. For characters facing life-defining tests, like Katniss, such suspicion is key to self-preservation. It can also be a defining strategy of adolescence, a way of gauging not just external truth but personal identity, which is no doubt a big part of why the “Hunger Games” books have connected so resoundingly with tweens and teens, both male and female. Translated from inner monologue to onscreen action, Katniss’ untamed quest for justice has lost some of its potency, which is no surprise in an event movie like “Hunger Games.” The risk remains that Katniss — and her inevitable imitators — could turn into distaff versions of gunslinger clichés, their very particular fury traded in for a more generic and accessible brand. The outrage that drives unlikely Katniss compatriot Lisbeth Salander, a.k.a. the girl with the dragon tattoo, has so far defied reduction in the move from bestsellers to screen (particularly in the ferocity of Noomi Rapace in the trilogy of Swedish films). Lisbeth is by no means a YA heroine, but she is, like Katniss, an unprecedented creation of take-no-prisoners intensity. And she, too, is a kind of hunter in a world gone mad. For this new breed of young female characters, the serious business of resisting malevolent or controlling forces is not all dystopian doom, however, and it doesn’t have to express itself in stoicism, ruthlessness or murderous rage. There’s magic, too, in those trials and tribulations. Emma Watson’s Hermione Granger in the “Harry Potter” films might not seem an obvious precursor of Katniss — a wand-wielding witch to her coal miner’s daughter. But she, more than the adolescent killing machines of “Hanna“ and “Kick-a$$,” is a paradigm of strength in conflicted emotional territory. Hermione never tunes down her braininess for the sake of being more unthreateningly “ladylike” or less annoying, no matter how many rolled eyes she provokes. She stands her ground, learns to focus her exceptional powers and proves essential to Harry’s, and Hogwarts’, epic struggle against darkness. Hermione finds romance, too, but it’s not the grand prize that satisfies all her longings. And when Collins makes romantic yearning a key thread in “The Hunger Games,” she gives it a postmodern twist by adding layers of reality-TV performance and self-awareness: young love as both media fodder and real awakening. But romance sells, and in the big-screen version that angle is sweetened, its edges smoothed, even if Katniss isn’t awaiting a princely kiss as the final, puzzle-solving piece of her story. From her ravaged future world, Katniss arrives in the multiplex as a fresh emblem, if not a fully realized cinematic creation. Through the books she already has staked a claim in the imaginations of girls and boys, women and men. And for now, she holds the mainstream movie spotlight as a vision of youthful defiance — feminine, unorthodox and unapologetic. Sam Miguel From the LA Times - - - They don't call it "Tim Burton's Dark Shadows," but they might as well have. Nominally based on the cult favorite 1960s daytime soap opera, this film has much more to do with what goes on inside director Tim Burton's head than with any TV show, no matter how beloved. In fact, "Dark Shadows" is as good an example as any of what might be called the Way of Tim, a style of making films that, like the drinking of blood, is very much an acquired taste and, unless you're a vampire, not worth the effort. Blood, of course, figures prominently in both the original "Dark Shadows,"which ran on ABC for 1,225 episodes between 1966 and 1971, and this new version, for both focus on the character of Barnabas Collins, an 18th century vampire who reappears in today's world. Back in the day, having a contemporary vampire on a daytime soap was unheard of, and "Dark Shadows" soon developed a devoted following that extended into reruns, including two youngsters who grew up to wield great power in Hollywood, filmmaker Burton and his frequent star, Johnny Depp. With Depp onboard as Collins, the director was free to construct his own version of "Dark Shadows," which plays much more fang in cheek, so to speak, than the more straight-ahead original. As a result, the film turns out to be an uncertain combination of elements that unsuccessfully tries to be half-scary, half-funny and all strange, a project that offers examples of the three Ws that make up the Way of Tim. The first W, is, as always, wonderful production design, which comes courtesy of Burton's longtime collaborator Rick Heinrichs, who won an Oscar for his work on the director's "Sleepy Hollow." Heinrichs has two worlds to deal with in the Seth Grahame-Smith script, starting with the rocky seacoast of Maine in the 1770s. Here resides the Collins family, grown great on the wealth fishing provides, who've founded the town of Collinsport and who live in a looming mansion called Collinswood Manor. The Collinses' only son Barnabas (Depp) is something of a ladies' man, but when he toys with the affections of servant Angelique Bouchard (Eva Green) he finds he literally has hell to pay. For Angelique is a practicing witch who brings a bleak end to Barnabas' love for Josette DuPres (Bella Heathcote) and turns the man himself into a vampire. Then, just to rub it in, she has him buried alive "so that his suffering would never end." Ouch. Eternity doesn't last as long as it used to, and a mere 200 years have passed when some unwary and unfortunate construction workers unearth Barnabas' coffin and set him free. "You can't imagine," he says after he's done his worst, "how thirsty I am...." Barnabas soon makes his way to Collinswood Manor, where he's passed off to the locals as a distant relative visiting from England. Very distant. The only person Barnabas freely takes into his confidence is the lady of the manor, Elizabeth Collins Stoddard (a welcome part for Michelle Pfeiffer, another youthful devotee of the TV series). Together they plot to return the Collins family to prominence. Standing in their way is the latest incarnation of Angelique, the ageless witch of yore who still lives in the area and runs a fish company called Angel Bay. Similarly, a young governess named Victoria Winters who's employed at Collinswood Manor is an incarnation of Barnabas' old love Josette. And so it goes. Helping to make all this folderol initially palatable is the second W of the Way of Tim, a certifiably weird performance by Depp, who likes nothing better than to disappear into the odd creatures that his director creates for his delectation. Burton and Depp have worked together so often — this is their eighth collaboration — that they are in danger of becoming a mondo bizarro version of John Ford and John Wayne. Still, Depp's performance is so unwavering in its commitment to eccentricity that it is hard not to be fitfully entertained. Depp amuses himself and others as a man out of time, a priggish, somewhat effete individual who is astounded at his first glimpse of television ("Reveal yourself, tiny songstress," he says to singers on the screen) and, as many dieters have before him, mistakes the M in a huge McDonald's sign for the entrance to hell. But as engaging as Depp can be, he and the rest of the ensemble (which includes Helena Bonham Carter, Chloe Grace Moretz and Jackie Earle Haley) are tripped up by the third W, which is Burton's woeful lack of concern with story and drama. A director of moments rather than wholes, Burton is prone to wander off point and engage with peripheral concerns (like a pointless concert cameo by Alice Cooper) rather than such pedestrian matters as plot coherence. "Dark Shadows" is all over the place, getting more grotesque and less involving the longer it goes on, and that, as even the undead would admit, is a damned shame. Joescoundrel 06-05-2012, 10:44 AM By Michael Cavna “The Dark Knight Rises” may be on the horizon, but Disney/Marvel’s “The Avengers” can now look at “The Dark Knight” in the rear-view mirror. “The Avengers” grossed $20.3-million this weekend to lift its total domestic take to $552.7-million — rocketing it past Warner Bros./DC’s ”The Dark Knight” ($533.3-million) for third all-time in the record books. The Marvel-superheroes-assembled blockbuster is now the most successful superhero film ever. James Cameron’s twin titans “Avatar” ($760.5-million) and “Titanic” ($658.5-million) still hold down the top two domestic slots. Grossing an additional $12.4-million globally, “The Avengers” also vaulted to the third spot all-time overseas with $1.36-billion — past the final “Harry Potter” ($1.33-billion) but far, far back of those same two box-office behemoths “Avatar” ($2.8-billion) and “Titanic” ($2.2-billion). (Figures not adjusted for inflation.) DC will soon set its sights on “The Avengers,” though — the much-anticipated release of “The Dark Knight Rises” looms for July. Universal Pictures’ “Snow White & the Huntsman” won the North American weekend with a surprisingly strong $56.3-million debut, according to studio estimates released Sunday — far outpacing expectations, since the princess-with-a-punch film wasn’t expected to gross more than $40-million. (What most surprised the studio: The boys showed up in almost equal numbers.) And fun fact: The Brothers Hemsworth have dominated the box office since March, thanks to former box-office champs “The Avengers” (Chris Hemsworth is Thor), “The Hunger Games” (co-starring Liam Hemsworth as Gale) and now ”Snow White” (Chris again). Final domestic numbers are expected Monday. Joescoundrel 06-05-2012, 10:47 AM ^ Thank the maker for advances in technology that allowed Hollywood to put the Avengers together on screen. Considering all of the sueprhero stuff they had to do, this would not have been possible, or at least would not have looked this good, had it been done in a less technologically capable time. Still, good directing and editing played critical roles here, without which this blockbuster would not have been as big a success. Joescoundrel 09-28-2012, 10:11 AM After Venice, Manuel Conde’s ‘Genghis Khan’—believed to be long lost—premieres at SM Mall of Asia on Sept. 29 By Bayani San Diego Jr. Philippine Daily Inquirer September 26, 2012 | 8:25 pm After a roundabout journey, “Genghis Khan” finds its way home. The original prints of Manuel Conde’s “Genghis Khan,” the same ones used in its screening at the Venice Film Festival in 1952, will be returned to the Philippines. As bonus, the restored version of the film, in DCP (Digital Cinema Package) and HD (High Definition) format, will be sent here as well. Believed to be long lost, “Genghis” turned up at the Venice vaults recently. “Genghis” was restored at the L’Immagine Ritrovata, a renowned laboratory based in Bologna, Italy. It was unveiled in Venice to a packed theater on Sept. 6 as part of a special retrospective of cinema classics. After the Venice screening, slight revisions were made for the Manila premiere. A joint undertaking of the Film Development Council of the Philippines (FDCP) and the Venice fest, the restoration and repatriation of “Genghis” will mark the official launching of the National Film Archive of the Philippines (NFAP). Formal turnover of the “Genghis” prints and DCP is set at the SM Mall of Asia on Sept. 29. A screening will follow after the repatriation ceremony. Stefano Francia di Celle, retrospective curator of the Venice fest, will attend the ceremony—along with Davide Pozzi, director of L’Immagine Ritrovata, and Luca Fornari, Italian ambassador. Actor-director Jun Urbano, Conde’s son, has also been invited to represent the Conde family. Art repatriation Briccio Santos, FDCP chair, said it was vital to return “Genghis” to the Philippines. “It is an affirmation of our cinema’s tradition of excellence,” he pointed out. “Ours is among the oldest film cultures in Asia and we take pride in this historic fact.” Venice’s repatriation of the “Genghis” prints will send a strong signal to the world cinema community and will hopefully inspire other foreign archives to turn over our old films, said Santos. After “Genghis,” the FDCP will pursue its campaign for the return of National Artist Gerry de Leon’s “Dyesebel” and “Banga ni Zimadar” from the Thai film archives. Santos also hopes to retrieve the Henry Francia collection from the Berkeley archive in California. Francia was a Filipino filmmaker who made films in New York in the 1960s, Santos recounted. One of Francia’s works is “On My Way to India Consciousness I Reached China.” “We’ve already spoken to Francia’s relatives and they’ve given their consent,” said Santos. Restoration projects The FDCP has other restoration projects in the offing. Two films by National Artist Ishmael Bernal, “Manila By Night” and “Tribute to Rita Gomez,” have been lined up for preservation, too. “We got the Rita movie, which was Bernal’s only docu, from the UP film archives and the French institution CNC will work on it,” Santos said. The CNC (National Center of Cinematography and the Moving Image, as translated in English) will also take charge of “Survivor,” a docu on the Philippine Republic’s first President, Emilio Aguinaldo, made by another National Artist, Lamberto Avellana. Quin Baterna and Leonardo Q. Belen’s “Ginauhaw Ako, Ginagutom Ako,” the first Ilonggo film made in 1975, is at the CNC as well. Another restoration project involves National Artist Lino Brocka’s “Maynila sa mga Kuko ng Liwanag.” “We will use the master negatives at the British Film Institute. We will initiate this project with Martin Scorsese’s World Cinema Foundation,” Santos said. Joescoundrel 09-28-2012, 10:14 AM September 26, 2012 | 5:18 pm MANILA, Philippines—Fifteen years ago, two girls went missing and set off a series of events that led to what would later be called “ Cebu ’s trial of the century.” While waiting for their father to pick them up, sisters Marijoy and Jacqueline Chiong disappeared at a mall in Cebu . Accused of their rape and murder was Paco Larrañaga, a culinary arts student whose whereabouts that day had been confirmed by dozens of witnesses and photographic evidence. He was in Manila, 300 miles away from Cebu , and couldn’t have been anywhere near the victims. There was a deafening clamor for immediate justice, not just in Cebu but throughout the country. So in a dramatic turn of events, the judge favored the plea of the Chiong sisters’ family and convicted Paco and six others for life imprisonment, a verdict which was eventually raised to death penalty due to pressure from the public and widespread media attention. The trial became a game of chess where many players were involved and people kept moving their pieces. In the end, Paco was checkmated—he was imprisoned in Bilibid for years, his fate celebrated by many as it was seen as a triumph. He was not given a chance to speak or defend himself. More than a decade since, filmmakers Marty Syjuco and Michael Collins give him a voice. They revisit old wounds and step into the many thorns of the Philippine justice system in their critically acclaimed documentary, Give Up Tomorrow. In addition to building a strong case for Paco’s innocence, the film exposes the messy scheme of events that surrounded the trial, revealing the interconnected complexities that permeate Philippine politics and culture. Disclosing a collection of interviews with forensic experts, political analysts, and major players in Paco’s case, not to mention controversial pieces of evidence that were left uncovered for a long time, Give Up Tomorrow brings to light the lack of due process and the elaborate frame-up done through a shameless display of political favors. The documentary begs the terrifying question: What if the so-called Cebu ’s trial of the century was actually a mistrial? Due to the film’s controversial subject, Syjuco and Collins had some trouble finding local venues for a commercial screening. In fact, no cineplex dared to screen it in Cebu , even for a premiere night. So the filmmakers, together with a small group of undaunted people, worked hard to bring it to Cebu , where it all began under the worst of circumstances. Finally, after touring the world’s film festivals and reaping laurels left and right, Give Up Tomorrow came home to Cebu and had its very first screening there last Wednesday, September 26, at the Marcelo B. Fernan Press Center. In Metro Manila, some theater managers fortunately realized how important it is for many Filipinos to see this eye-opening documentary.Give Up Tomorrow will be screened exclusively at Robinsons Galleria and Robinsons Ermita from October 3 to 9, and at Trinoma, Greenbelt 3, and Alabang Town Center from October 5 to 7. A regular theatrical run in Cebu may yet happen if enough Cebuanos are ready to revisit a traumatic past and call into question what has long been considered there as justice served. With theatrical playdates in New York City on September 28 and Metro Manila on October 3, Give Up Tomorrow is screening in New York , Manila and Cebu all in the same week. Joescoundrel Associated Press September 27, 2012 | 10:13 am 6 Filipino writer and director Jun Robles Lana poses after an interview with the Associated Press in suburban Quezon City, north of Manila, Philippines on Wednesday September 26, 2012. Lana’s film “Bwakaw”, an indie drama that explores the loneliness and missed opportunities of an ailing, 70-year-old gay man has tested the local sensibilities about sexuality and, if it passes the Academy Awards’ nomination process, may get a shot as the country’s entry for the best foreign-language film next year.AP/Aaron Favila MANILA, Philippines — An independent drama that explores the loneliness and missed opportunities of an ailing, 70-year-old gay man is testing Philippine sensibilities about sexuality and hoping to advance in the Academy Awards’ foreign-language film competition next year. “Bwakaw,” or “Voracious,” has received positive reviews and local awards and is doing the rounds of international film festivals in Toronto, New York, Hawaii and Tokyo. Writer and director Jun Robles Lana says the movie is named after a stray dog with a voracious appetite for life that has a bond with the main character, Rene. Bwakaw’s zest for life contrasts with Rene’s grumpy disposition. Rene came out of the closet in his twilight years, thinks it is too late for love and only awaits his own death. He has made a will and labeled his few possessions to be given away to friends. He even bought a coffin at a funeral home’s closing-out sale. But when Bwakaw dies after an illness, Rene, played by veteran actor Eddie Garcia, finds new appreciation for life. “It’s the dog that basically teaches him to live life to the fullest,” Lana said in an interview Wednesday. “It’s really more about loneliness, although you can’t help that some people or critics are branding it a gay film simply because the character is gay, but that’s really beside the point,” he said. Lana admits that while Filipinos are generally gay-friendly — the most popular movie star is Vice Ganda, an out-and-out gay comedian — local mainstream audiences might not be too receptive to a serious take on homosexuality in the conservative and predominantly Roman Catholic society. “We tend to look at gay characters as iconic, funny characters,” he said. “So when you make a movie like this, you really have to market it in such a way that it would be more appealing to them.” He said that the movie focuses on the comedy aspect in order to appeal to a wider audience. But the filmmaker hopes that between the laughs, moviegoers will find that it is more than a comedy. He said he made the film with the intention to honor his mentor, writer Rene Villanueva, who died in 2007. He described Villanueva, who came out as gay later in his life, as generous and harsh at the same time, and an inspiration for the main character, Rene. Lana said the drama “eventually became a story about growing old, missed opportunities, about how desire is inextricable from our lives.” For Lana, who started in art house films but has for the last few years been mainly involved in commercial movies, “Bwakaw” was also “a return to my roots.” “I did not expect this film which I made for very personal reasons would resonate with so many people and not just Filipinos,” he said. “I’m really just thankful for all the wonderful things going our way.” The Philippines has submitted entries to the Academy Awards for many years but has never been nominated or even short-listed. “Bwakaw” is one of around 40 films entered in the foreign-language category this year. The list is to be pared to 10 late this year and to the final five nominees by January. Sam Miguel Marilou Diaz-Abaya in her last hours high on a ‘starry, starry night…’ By Marinel R. Cruz October 10, 2012 | 12:55 am “Starry, starry night…” Actor Cesar Montano sang Don McLean’s “Vincent” softly to his dear friend, filmmaker Marilou Diaz-Abaya, as she lay on her deathbed early evening on Monday. “I cried so hard, I had a hard time finishing,” Montano told the Inquirer by phone yesterday. “The song is an ode to (19th-century Dutch artist) Vincent van Gogh and was our favorite—she was a painter, like me.” Montano was one of a few friends that Abaya had asked to be around in her last hours. She succumbed to breast cancer at 6:30 p.m., at St. Luke’s Medical Center in Global City, Taguig. Abaya was already “heavily sedated” when he arrived at 10 that morning, Montano said; yet she was able to mouth “I love you” to him and his wife, actress Sunshine Cruz. The actor recounted: “I told her, ‘Dito lang kami (We’ll be close by).’ She could only make feeble gestures by then. I sang worship songs to her the entire day. When I started singing ‘Vincent,’ she made this abrupt movement that surprised all of us. I think she wanted to sing it with me.” Among those present in the hospital suite were Abaya’s sons, Marc and David, filmmaker Olivia Lamasan, and ABS-CBN executives Malou Santos and Enrico Santos. Montano added: “It was painful to see her go. I held her hand; David held the other.” The award-winning director was diagnosed with breast cancer in January 2007. Her health improved in 2008, but the cancer returned the following year. It went into remission again in 2010 and recurred in 2011. Abaya’s son Marc told the Philippine Daily Inquirer last month, “It’s stage 4 now, but she’s fighting.” In a TV interview shortly after his mother passed on, Marc said, “She was ready; it was up to us, the family, to be ready, too—to be there [and] give her love in the final moments.” Ate Vi’s ‘mom’ Actress and Batangas Gov. Vilma Santos, who first worked with Abaya in the controversial sex-thriller, “Baby Tsina,” last saw the director at the wake of actor Johnny Delgado, who also died of cancer, in 2009. Santos recalled: “Direk Marilou was already sick then, but she told me, ‘Kaya ko ‘to (I can handle this)!’ Her face never showed she was in pain. She was just very excited about the movie she was working on, a tribute to Our Lady of Peñafrancia.” The movie, “Ikaw Ang Pag-Ibig” was Abaya’s last. It was released in 2011, distributed by Star Cinema. The actress said she had lost someone she considered “a mother” with Abaya’s passing. For Montano, Abaya was a “personal adviser—my mentor, my most trusted director.” Abaya directed him in the landmark films “Jose Rizal” (1998), “Muro Ami” (1999) and “Bagong Buwan” (2001). The actor related: “She called me Pepe—from my role in ‘Rizal.’ As a filmmaker, she was very learned and highly technical—and very organized, especially during pre-production. She was very thorough.” For “Muro Ami,” Montano said Abaya “challenged” him to get in shape in just three months. “She made me practice deep-sea diving even with heavy rains that resulted in zero visibility. She explained that if I prevailed in the worse conditions, actual filming would be a piece of cake.” But he was happy that his friend had “died filled with so much love for everyone in her life. I’m lucky to have met and shared fond memories with her.” Deathbed promise A few months ago, in an interview with broadcast journalist Jessica Soho, Abaya spoke of realizations resulting from her affliction: “We tend to take love for granted. We don’t show it enough. It’s because we don’t have enough time. What cancer has given me is time… to think about my mortality and what my life is worth and what I can still make of it.” Award-winning writer Ricky Lee said he made a deathbed promise to Abaya that he would finish the book they had been working on for months. “It’s a double memoir,” he said, “about our life and work during the ’80s.” Lee said Abaya was still working on several scripts, but that when she was already too weak to write, she turned over a few to him. One of these, Lee said, was a bio pic of painter Juan Luna; another is about Maria Rosa Henson, the first Filipino woman to tell her story as a comfort woman in World War II. “Another script in progress is ‘One Last Cigarette Before I Go,’” said Lee. “It’s Marilou’s line—she would always say that after a long brainstorming session. The story is of a dying man who tries to set things right, make amends.” Art and good food Santos said she used to hang out at Abaya’s house in Quezon City. “She liked showing me her paintings. She served good food. I would stay there for hours.” In the end, Santos said, though they seldom communicated, “I was constantly updated by colleagues of her condition. I know how hard she fought [but] at least she’s resting now.” Montano related that, among his friends, it was Abaya who grieved the most when his son Angelo committed suicide in March 2010. “Angelo was her baby. They were scuba diving buddies. She attended to everything during Angelo’s wake and burial. She told me to stay composed and not break down in public, for my family’s sake.” During that last interview with Soho, Abaya also said: “There’s really no death. We’re just in transition from one stage to another. [These days] when I wake up in the morning, I [feel] that the Lord had nudged me. Maybe there are a few more things that he wants me to do.” Abaya’s remains will lie at the Ateneo Chapel (Gonzaga building) in Quezon City until Friday. Masses will be celebrated everyday at 6:55 a.m., 12 p.m., 6 p.m. and 8 p.m. She will be laid to rest on Saturday at Loyola Memorial Park in Parañaque City. Sam Miguel True spaghetti fare: ‘Django’ meets ‘Genghis Khan’ meets ‘Madrasta’ 2012 MovieMov Italian film fest features homage to Sergio Leone By Amad�*s Ma. Guerrero Philippine Daily Inquirer 1:27 am | Monday, November 26th, 2012 It’s the second time around for MovieMov (Italian Film Festival), and it threatens to become even livelier this time, what with a slew of quality films and commercial movies and a cabal of Filipino films. These include the celebrated “Genghis Khan” of Manuel Conde and Olivia Lamasan’s “The Mistress.” This was announced at a recent press conference in Spices at Peninsula Manila. “Why ‘The Mistress,’” asked a media man. “He means that movie is not of festival quality,” a colleague and self-appointed interpreter said. “You’re putting words in my mouth,” the media man protested. “And I agree,” the colleague concluded triumphantly. Aba. This put the Italians present on the defensive. “We are not only into indie films but also commercial movies,” pointed out Emanuela Adesini, cultural attaché of the Italian embassy. “This is not Cinemalaya, which has its own characteristics. Why not commercial movies? It doesn’t mean that they are not important. This is cinema.” Besides, she added, the movie referred to dramatizes “a common Filipino situation.” Italian, too, one might add. Another writer questioned the inclusion of the spaghetti westerns of Clint Eastwood as directed by Sergio Leone: “Have these contributed to the art of Italian cinema? Are these a good influence on the youth?” Italian Senator Goffredo Bettini, speaking through interpreter Cristina Moritta, came to the defense of Leone, an Italian master: “He represents an innovation in the language of cinema. He has a mastery of scenes, with music, and he was followed by newer generations. He is an inspiration to them.” (Editor’s note: Quentin Tarantino has just helmed “Django Unchained,” the American director’s tribute to Leone.) Albert Almendralejo of the Independent Filmmakers Cooperative added: “We have our Erap Estrada and Lito Lapid; they came from Sergio Leone. We have to recognize that fact.” The 2nd MovieMov (“movies and movement”) Festival will be held Dec. 5-9 at Greenbelt 3 cinemas in Makati City, free to the public. It will be launched by a special invitational program on Dec. 4. Other Italian movies Apart from the Leone retrospective, seven contemporary Italian films will be shown, headlined by “Cesare Deve Morire” (Caesar Must Die), which will compete in next year’s Oscars. Directed by Paolo and Vittorio Taviani, and shot in a prison, “Caesar Must Die” tells the story of convicts rehearsing the assassination of the emperor Julius Caesar. One of the main characters is an ex-convict (name not given) and he will be here for the festival. “It is not just a movie but a social experiment,” Bettini declared. MovieMov “is a very ambitious program,” the senator said. “We brought Italian films of high quality. We followed criteria. The films are very relevant, socially and politically. They show the violence, the industrial crisis in our country.” Apart from the films of Conde and Lamasan, three other Filipino movies will be shown: Chito Roño’s “Dekada ’70,” Gutierrez Mangasakan’s “Limbunan”; and the winner of the National Film Festival in Davao City. Italian Ambassador Luca Fornari said MovieMov would be different this time: “We are targeting the youth (high school and university). There will be special screenings for students (10 a.m., Dec. 5-9) and a master class, with free transportation and interaction with artists.” The winning film will be decided by the audience. And the writer of the best feature on MovieMov will—get this—win a four-day all-expenses-paid trip to Rome. Bettini said the film fest was reaching out to the youth because young people today “are being educated by TV, unfortunately, with its degrading language, and that is why we are bringing cinema to the youth, to educate their conscience.” Sam Miguel ‘Oro, Plata, Mata’ restored, Bacolod screening planned By Bayani San Diego Jr. Philippine Daily Inquirer December 9, 2012 | 8:34 pm After a recent private screening of “Oro, Plata, Mata,” director Peque Gallaga approached Manet Dayrit, head of Central Digital Lab—the company that digitally restored the 1982 film—and told him he wanted to correct the sound and dialogue in a scene. Gallaga had actively participated in the restoration process. He told the Inquirer how elated he had been that a team of professionals had spent a lot of time (at least 1,500 hours) and effort restoring the landmark film to its full glory. The project was spearheaded by ABS-CBN Film Archives. More than an award “For me, this is more precious than an award. It says that people cared enough about the film to preserve it,” Gallaga said. The film’s cinematographer, Rody Lacap, was also involved. “He checked the color grading,” said Gallaga. “When we shot the movie, we were going for a certain glow, a golden patina.” Gallaga also made sure the sound quality would be as he originally intended it. “In the 1980s, movie houses didn’t have high-tech sound system. [Even] subtle background music was played too loud." Joel Torre was a production assistant before landing the lead role in “Oro, Plata, Mata,” his acting debut. He recalled that in those days before digital technology, editing was done manually. “With this restoration, even dust, fingerprint and scotch tape marks were removed from the film.” The new “Oro” was unveiled to the public on Nov. 28, opening the Cinema One Originals fest. Other big plans An earlier restoration project, Ishmael Bernal’s “Himala,” started a theatrical run on Dec. 5. Leo Katigbak, head of the ABS-CBN archives, told the Inquirer about similar plans for “Oro,” including a screening in Bacolod, the film’s setting. There is also the possibility of releasing a special criterion edition of “Oro” on video—with special features like the director’s commentary and recollections from the cast and crew. Gallaga remembered tapping campus theater groups: “Maids and houseboys in the film were played by student-actors from La Salle, St. Scholastica’s and La Consolacion in Bacolod.” Joel Torre discovered Scriptwriter Jose Javier Reyes ended up doing a cameo as a Chinese cook in the opening party scene. “I was hanging out on the set all the time,” Reyes said, and added that Joel Torre was “discovered” via the movie. “Albert Martinez was supposed to play the lead, but he was tied up with ‘Bata pa si Sabel.’ Joel, a production assistant at the time, got the part. It changed his life.” The movie captures Torre, Sandy Andolong and Cherie Gil at their prime. After watching a preview of the restored “Oro,” Torre noted, “We had great skin…we didn’t need HD makeup.” Seriously, he said, he was reminded of coworkers who had since passed on—actors Mary Walter, Manny Ojeda, Abbo de la Cruz and production designer Don Escudero.” For actress Fides Cuyugan-Asensio, watching “Oro” again was a “sentimental revisit, especially now that I am doing one indie film after the other.” (The movie was produced by the Experimental Cinema of the Philippines.) First step The restoration of “Oro” and “Himala” marks an important first step in the long journey ahead, said Gallaga. “There are 3,000 titles in the network’s library. Even if they restore one film a day, it will take them over 10 years to finish everything.” There was a missing scene from the print used to restore the film, the result of celluloid unspooling from the projector. “It shows Sandy and Joel in a field of ferns during a storm,” Gallaga said. “I wanted to do a Celso Ad. Castillo with that scene.” Sam Miguel Philippine Daily Inquirer December 11, 2012 | 8:47 pm Movie director Tikoy Aguiluz, also founder of the annual Cinemanila International Film Festival, paid tribute to this year’s participating filmmakers during the awards ceremony held on Saturday night at the Bonifacio High Street Central Amphitheater in Taguig City. “We never offered any grants, nor gave a P500,000 subsidy. We don’t even give cash prizes like we used to, but still they made their films and submitted them to Cinemanila. Tonight is all about these filmmakers,” Aguiluz said during his welcome speech. “We’ve always wanted to do and show a good film, and whether there’s an audience for them or not, we never seemed to care,” he pointed out. “We always thought that if we show a good film, the audience will come.” Teng Mangansakan’s “Obscured Histories and Silent Longings of Daguluan’s Children” bagged this year’s Lino Brocka Grand Prize for the Digital Lokal category. Mangansakan also brought home the best director honor. The grand jury prize in this category went to Arnel Mardoquio’s “Ang Paglalakbay ng Mga Bituin sa Gabing Madilim.” In the Young Cinema category, Carl Joseph Papa’s “Ang Prinsesa, Ang Prinsipe at si Marlborita” was the best short film winner, while Bienvenido Ferrer III was the recipient of the Ishmael Bernal award for his work on “Kabilang Dulo.” For the international competition category, Kang Yi-kwan’s “Juvenile Offender” bagged the Lino Brocka Grand Prize. See Young-ju was chosen best actor for his work in this South Korean drama. The grand jury prize went to James Lee’s “If It’s Not Now, Then When?” of Malaysia. Oula Hamadeh copped the best actress award for her performance in the Maryan Najafi film “Kayan,” which represented Iran, Canada and Lebanon. The best director honor in this category was shared by Carlos Reygadas for “Post Tenebras Luz” (Mexico) and Nawapol Thomrangrattanarit for “36” (Malaysia). The late Filipino directors Marilou Diaz-Abaya and Celso Ad. Castillo, as well as the late Italian filmmaker-producer Sergio Leone, were the recipients of this year’s Lifetime Achievement awards (posthumous). The same honor was also bestowed upon the Malaysian production firm Sahamongkol Film International. Malaysian Panu Aree, a jury member for the international competition category, accepted the award in behalf of the film outfit. Other members of the international competition jury board were Arlyn dela Cruz and Eduardo Alajar. Jury members for the Digital Lokal category were Jo Ji-hoon, Mike Rapatan and Prabda Yoon. The jury board for the Young Cinema category was composed of Aki Isoyama, Antoinette Jadaone and Raymond Lee. ‘Harana-inspired’ “The jury members have traveled from different parts of the world just to participate in this festival because for the past 14 years, we have shown the kind of movies they all like to see—works of young filmmakers who we think are ground-breaking,” Aguiluz said. The awards show was a “harana-inspired” red carpet event, hosted by actor Archie Adamos and Miss World 2011 first runner-up Gwendolyn Ruais. Benito Bautista’s documentary “Harana,” about the dying Filipino tradition of serenading, was screened after the ceremony. Filipino folk singer and composer Noel Cabangon was one of the performers. Thomrangrattanarit’s “36,” this year’s closing film, was screened at the Market! Market! Cinemas on Dec. 10. fujima04 12-13-2012, 12:48 PM Another upcoming Superman film next year. Just saw the trailer yesterday. This film was produced by the director of Dark Knight - Christopher Nolan. Man of Steel (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Man_of_Steel_%28film%29) http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/3/3f/Man_of_Steel_poster.jpg/220px-Man_of_Steel_poster.jpg 12-14-2012, 02:32 PM Bill Murray scoffs at doubt as FDR in 'Hyde Park on Hudson' Bill Murray stars as FDR in Roger Michell's historical tale "Hyde Park On Hudson." (December 13, 2012) Michael Phillips, Movie Critic 2:42 p.m. CST, December 13, 2012 For Bill Murray, playing Franklin Delano Roosevelt in the new film “Hyde Park on Hudson” meant risking some serious derision. Now 62, Murray carries with him a huge recognition factor thanks to a host of comedies: "Stripes," "Caddyshack," "Groundhog Day," "Ghostbusters." More recently he has brought a weary, witty gravitas to more bittersweet material, a la "Rushmore," "Lost in Translation" and others. And now here he is, the world's premier deadpan minimalist, taking on an exuberant president whose face is common currency (not just on dimes) and whose moneyed, distinctly well-bred vowel sounds are well-known. Murray as FDR? Potential failure looms over each drag on the cigarette holder. Whatever one thinks of director Roger Michell's "Hyde Park on Hudson," written by dramatist and screenwriter Richard Nelson, Murray's performance conveys a sly confidence in its depiction of a president orchestrating a house party for the visiting king and queen of England in 1939. Much of the picture deals, speculatively, with FDR's relationship with a distant cousin, played by Laura Linney. The Wilmette native and I talked in a hotel room in Toronto three months ago during the Toronto International Film Festival. To ease him into a comfort zone, Murray said, director Michell shot a few days' worth of undemanding, largely dialogue-free footage of FDR driving, smiling through photo ops, that sort of thing. "Roger was very smart about getting me into it physically," Murray said. At first he did not wear FDR's polio braces for all his scenes, but soon it became clear to both him and Michell that they were necessary. "There's never a second where you're not in discomfort," he said of the braces. "And that discomfort creates something to play." One of Murray's sisters, who lives in Wilmette, contracted polio as a child and wore braces for years. "I called her a couple of days into the movie and said: 'I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I never had any idea,'" Murray said. "She had permanent marks from those braces. To go through that, in the midst of a large family, she really had to hustle to keep up. ... It was a big struggle. But she never complained. And she's incredibly resilient. She's bouncy." The braces brought one dose of reality to the actor's preparation. FDR's pince-nez brought another. On this topic, a different side of Murray — the sidewinding wiseacre — emerges. "Man, I love those things," he said of the so-called pinchers. "I recommend them. I'm always breaking or losing reading glasses, but I really enjoyed those things. My distant vision's great; up close, I'm not so good. Anyway. I strongly recommend them." If anyone could bring pince-nez into general circulation in America again, it's probably Bill Murray. "Give 'em a stab!" he said, grinning. "They're comfortable!" Said Linney in a separate Toronto interview: "Attempting to do FDR would induce fear in anybody. Bill took it very seriously. But with a light heart. Very committed. Whatever fear he was encountering, he kept to himself." Olivia Williams, Murray's co-star in "Rushmore," plays Eleanor Roosevelt in "Hyde Park on Hudson." Regarding Murray: "He's a man who's utterly comfortable and confident in his own skin. And he has a hint of anarchy. I think Bill and FDR share that quality." A few days into the filming, Murray said, there was an aha! moment — a scene in which the Roosevelts usher their guests into the dining room after cocktails — that for Murray was the launching pad. For a while, he acknowledged, the actor playing FDR was aware of "everyone hearing your voice and wondering: Does it sound right? Does it sound good? Everyone's kind of judging it. "And then there was a moment when I wasn't just saying the words, but started improvising in character. And I thought: This feels right. I've got it now." Sam Miguel Indie joins the big league Philippine Daily Inquirer December 25, 2012 | 7:42 pm In this December’s Metro Manila Film Festival (MMFF), two indie filmmakers will compete with the usual array of “Enteng,” “Agimat” and “Shake” franchise flicks. Apart from Brillante Ma. Mendoza, a surprise addition with his “Thy Womb,” another indie director, Lawrence Fajardo, made it to the final list with “The Strangers.” Last July, in the Directors’ Showcase section of this year’s Cinemalaya, Fajardo won best film for “Posas.” Earlier this month, “Posas” won the top prize at the Hanoi International Film Festival. Then again, the MMFF is a big leap from Cinemalaya and Hanoi. “I am excited and pressured at the same time,” Fajardo admitted. “It’s not only my first MMFF; it’s also my first horror film.” It’s a baptism of fire, in more ways than one. Still, his wish is to bring his style of filmmaking from the indie to the commercial circles. He explained: “Even in the mainstream, I hope to continue making films in the same mold as my previous efforts—more dramatic, edgier, grittier.” Role models He named master filmmakers Celso Ad. Castillo and Peque Gallaga as the horror directors he hopes to emulate. “My favorite is Direk Peque’s ‘Manananggal’ episode from the first ‘Shake, Rattle and Roll,’” he said. Other favorite horror flicks of his are William Friedkin’s “The Exorcist” and Stanley Kubrick’s “The Shining.” He described horror as “an exciting genre that generates various emotions among audiences.” He confessed, however, that he does find horror a bit daunting. “It’s challenging, but I welcome it,” he said. “[With ‘The Strangers’], I’d like to tell a horror story with a unique flavor.” Although independently produced, “The Strangers” could also qualify as a commercial undertaking, said lawyer Joji Alonso, head of Quantum Films. Fajardo got to stretch his directing muscles in this one. “We have stunts, effects, prostheses. We have a big cast,” said Fajardo. “It’s a whole new playing field for me. I realized it’s not easy to scare audiences” On the set of “The Strangers,” Fajardo encountered all sorts of challenges, from inclement weather to the unwieldy schedules of the cast. His stars are among the busiest in the industry—JM de Guzman, Enrique Gil, Julia Montes, Enchong Dee, Janice de Belen and Cherry Pie Picache. The director was happy to reunite with “Amok” and “Posas” actors Spanky Manikan, Nico Antonio, Art Acuña and Garry Lim via his MMFF entry. “It was my first time to work with veterans Jaime Fabregas, Tanya Gomez and Johnny Revilla, too,” he related. “I’m thankful that the entire cast was very cooperative.” He recounted that it was a difficult shoot, “but the actors had no complaints even though we had to shoot at times drenched with rain and mud.” He was likewise all-praise for his producer Alonso. “She was very supportive. Finishing this movie wasn’t easy, but she remained steadfast and committed.” Fajardo considers himself a “collaborative” director. He explained: “I have an efficient crew and they helped me achieve my vision. As a director, sometimes you have to attack scenes differently in order to make each one effective.” He has a simple Christmas wish this year. “I hope viewers will appreciate ‘The Strangers,’ to make all our hard work and sacrifices worthwhile.” After this brief fling with the mainstream, Fajardo is raring to return to his first love. “I have a few projects in the works. Balik-indie ulit (back to indie again),” he said. Sam Miguel Value of film preservation, restoration acknowledged By Nestor Torre Philippine Daily Inquirer December 25, 2012 | 7:33 pm For years now, we’ve been urging our film people and educators to preserve and restore our rapidly diminishing cinematic patrimony for future generations to delight in and learn from. Too many of our film classics have been lost forever due to benign neglect and clueless carelessness. We aren’t talking just about the movies of the 1930s, of which only two or three are still extant. The films of the ’40s have also been decimated to an alarming degree, save for the output of a couple of major studios. For instance, Sampaguita Pictures has been able to save, in one form or another, around 25 percent of its total output of 800 films. A standout From the ’50s onward, the standout was FPJ Productions due to its star-producer-owner Fernando Poe Jr.’s enlightened interest in film preservation, which prompted him to come up with inexpensive methods to preserve film negatives from celluloid’s nasty penchant for “vinegar rot” and spontaneously catching fire when the room temperature rises. FPJ’s heirs have benefited a lot from his avid interest in film preservation, and so have all Filipino film buffs, because his starrers continue to be shown on TV to this day. Until recently, however, film restoration has been done very occasionally. Even some of the movies of Lino Brocka and Ishmael Bernal have gone the way of all flesh—and flash of spontaneous combustion! How woefully clueless and irresponsible of us to fail to see the value of movies, not just as entertainment products, but also as totems and the iconography of the nation’s life as it has evolved through the years! Happily, in the past couple of years, more organizations and enlightened individuals have invested in the restoration of our film classics, like “Genghis Khan,” “Himala” and “Oro, Plata, Mata.” In fact, it’s become quite the “in” trend of late. Knee-jerk trends Most of the time, we ignore trends because they’re so knee-jerk and impermanent, but this one deserves our full support and encouragement. Our own personal epiphany in the importance of film preservation and restoration hit us like a bolt of lightning when we attended the Fukuoka festival of Asian films in Japan, and learned that the festival organizers’ film vault contained well-preserved copies of Filipino cinematic gems—many of which were no longer extant in the Philippines! Enlightened foreigners It was a chastening moment for us to realize that enlightened foreigners cared more for our movies than we did. In many instances, where it helps or hurts us the most, we really are the last to know. But, there’s still time to make amends, so we urge more people and organizations to restore as many Filipino movies as they can, beginning with the films of the ’30s and ’40s. Next, we should make it a point to preserve our best filmmakers’ first movies, because they usually contain the seeds of the themes that they explore through the rest of their careers. In addition, we should make sure that these exceptional films aren’t just restored and then hidden away, but are viewed by young filmmakers and movie buffs. Local TV’s movie channels should showcase them, to remind everyone of our great achievements in cinema—with many more to come! Sam Miguel ‘Parade of Stars’ kicks off film fest By Allan Policarpio December 24, 2012 | 12:51 am For celebrities, there’s nothing quite as exciting as being on a float and seeing a sea of fans wanting to catch a glimpse of them. That’s why the annual “Parade of Stars” that kicks off the Metro Manila Film Festival (MMFF)—now in its 38th year—is an event show biz neophytes aspire to be a part of, and a tradition for seasoned actors and actresses. On a sweltering Sunday afternoon, eight eye-catching floats representing eight competing entries delighted the fans who lined the parade route, which started at Quirino Grandstand in Rizal Park and ended at SM Mall of Asia. Despite the ominous clouds, the participants were generally upbeat, such as “Sosy Problems” star Bianca King, who was dressed comfortably in a pink tank top and shorts. “I’m looking forward to seeing all the beautiful faces in the parade. I don’t mind if it rains or if it gets hot,” she said. But the skies turned sunny. Smiling, the stars blew kisses, threw goodies and waved at some 300,000 people as the motorcade moved on. Singer and former child actor Makisig Morales of “Shake Rattle and Roll XIV” said being in the parade was a dream come true. “Not a lot of actors get a chance,” he said. Actress Mercedes Cabral of the indie drama “Thy Womb” was likewise excited about her first time joining the parade. She said the event reminded her of her college days in the University of the Philippines Diliman, where she used to help create floats for the yearly Lantern Parade. “The Strangers” star Janice de Belen isn’t exactly new to joining the MMFF. The Kapamilya actress, who’s also in “Shake Rattle and Roll XIV,” said she couldn’t remember if she had actually ridden on a parade float before. “This is a whole new experience for me, and I’m quite nervous!” she exclaimed. ‘A great feeling’ For veterans, the festivities have become an indelible part of their careers. Sen. Ramon “Bong” Revilla, Jr., a star in the fantasy-adventure flick “Si Agimat, Si Enteng at Si Ako,” said in an earlier interview: “As a celebrity, it’s my job to entertain and make people happy. Seeing the fans is such a great feeling.” It’s been 15 years since Nora Aunor joined the festivities and the Superstar was excited to be once again part of the celebrations. She told the Philippine Daily Inquirer that “I’m happy that we were able to get in.” Aunor holds the record for the most MMFF best actress wins with seven. This year, critics are touting the 59-year-old actress as the one to beat for her performance in the indie drama “Thy Womb,” which already has won for her acting trophies at the Venice Film Festival and the Asia Pacific Screen Awards. 8 floats Dressed in traditional Badjao clothing, Aunor, “Thy Womb” director Brillante Mendoza and costar Cabral were aboard an oversized replica of a lepa, a Badjao boathouse. They were joined on by mock rowers and dancers, who regaled the people with Badjao dances. Fans chanted “Nora! Nora!” as she ascended the float. The float of “Si Agimat, Si Enteng at Si Ako”—reportedly worth P1 million—carried Vic Sotto, who sported a warrior costume. A monster octopus was prominently featured at the front of the float, while its sides were decked with colorful wild flowers and plants. Revilla and Judy Ann Santos joined Sotto on the float later. Ai Ai de las Alas, Kris Aquino and Vice Ganda led the cast of “Sisterakas” on a bright and loud float adorned with photo cutouts of lipsticks, diamonds and perfume bottles. The float of “The Strangers” was a simple red and black rectangular vessel. On it were Enchong Dee, Julia Montes, Enrique Gil and JM de Guzman. Rose petals Faux rose petals were sprinkled on the sides of the float of the drama “One More Try.” Angel Locsin, Zanjoe Marudo and Dingdong Dantes waved as the float inched slowly. The fully costumed cast of “El Presidente” was led by Jeorge “ER” Estregan, Cristine Reyes, Christopher de Leon, Cesar Montano and Baron Geisler. Their float had a replica of Emilio Aguinaldo mounted on a horse. The orange and black float of “Shake, Rattle and Roll XIV” featured an ominous-looking insect. On it were Dennis Trillo, De Belen, AJ Dee, Eula Caballero, Mart Escudero and Albie Casiño. The 38th MMFF runs from Dec. 25 to Jan. 8, 2013. Joescoundrel Jeers greet Metro film fest awards: Justifying crap By Marinel R. Cruz December 29, 2012 | 12:39 am Online jeers, more than cheers, continue in reaction to the 38th Metro Manila Film Festival (MMFF) awards given on Thursday night. The two most pointed posts on Facebook as of Friday night described the best picture citation for Star Cinema’s “One More Try” as “justifying crap with more crap” and “celebrating and rewarding mediocrity.” Producers did not reply to the Inquirer’s query about observations, also gathered online, comparing the film to an award-winning 2008 Chinese movie. “One More Try” is about a former couple, now with different partners, who can save the sickly child of their earlier relationship only by having another child. While working on a parallel story line, the Chinese movie, “In Love We Trust,” is seen as a commentary on China’s one-child policy. Earlier on Thursday, Cinemanila International Film Festival director Amable “Tikoy” Aguiluz posted an “urgent message” on his personal Facebook account calling for action against cinemas pulling out one of the MMFF entries, replacing it with others that were doing better in ticket sales. “This is a festival and the film (‘Thy Womb’) deserves a full run,” Aguiluz said. He urged “all lovers of Filipino cinema” to march to Meralco Theater in Pasig City, where the awards rites were held, “and demand the movie’s return to the theaters.” No such demonstration was noted on Thursday night. Three other “slow-moving” entries were said to be replaced with the more popular ones. Cited abroad “I hope this award will make people more curious about the movie [so] we don’t get pulled out from any more cinemas,” said Brillante Ma. Mendoza, named best director for “Thy Womb.” The movie, which has won awards for Mendoza and lead actress Nora Aunor in film festivals abroad, is the only entry that did not reach the P1-million mark when the festival opened on Christmas Day. It is reportedly still at the bottom of the box-office rankings at press time. “Thy Womb” tells the story of a Badjao midwife who, failing to conceive, finds a second wife for her husband. The role won for Aunor the MMFF best actress trophy. In her acceptance speech, the actress said in Filipino: “I always tell people that, as a singer, I continue to sing even if only five people are listening. As an actor, I promise to keep making meaningful films, if I have to produce them myself, as long as there are even a few people watching.” “Thy Womb” bagged the Gatpuno Villegas Memorial and the Most Gender-Sensitive Film awards. It also won best production design for Mendoza; best cinematography for Odyssey Flores; and best story for Henry Burgos. Theater assignments In a joint statement sent to the Inquirer on Friday, Metro Manila Development Authority (MMDA, which mounts the festival) chair Francis Tolentino and MMFF executive chair Jesse Ejercito insisted: “The assignment of theaters to the eight official entries [was] done fairly.” They explained that in Metro Manila, theater assignments were determined by drawing lots. However, in the provinces, they said, the decision was “up to the theater owners.” The festival became nationwide more than 10 years ago. No big winner “One More Try,” directed by Ruel Bayani, won for Dingdong Dantes his second best festival actor award. Last year, he won for another Star Cinema production, “Segunda Mano.” The film also won best editing for Vito Kahili and best screenplay for Anna Karenina Ramos, Kriz Gazmen and Jay Fernando. It received the first Fernando Poe Jr. Memorial Award and Miguel Vergara was named best child performer. Number-wise, though, it wasn’t the big winner; this distinction went to the Emilio Aguinaldo bio pic “El Presidente,” which ran away with the most awards, starting with second best picture. Cesar Montano, who plays Andres Bonifacio in the movie, won best supporting actor; Jamir Garcia and apl.de.ap, best theme song; and Jesse Lasaten, best musical score; Albert Idioma, best sound. “El Presidente” also bagged the best float and Youth Choice awards. Best makeup award was given to Warren Munar, Benny Batoctoy and Virginia Apolinario. The Wenn Deramas comedy “Sisterakas” was declared third best picture. The criteria For festival watchers confused by the choices, here are the awards criteria from the MMDA: “25 percent for creativity and artistic excellence, innovativeness and global appeal; 25 percent for technical excellence and innovativeness; 25 percent for content; and 25 percent for Filipino, cultural and/or historical value.” This year’s panel of judges was chaired by Prof. Rowena Capulong-Reyes, dean of Colegio de San Juan de Letran’s College of Liberal Arts and Sciences. Among the members were: Felipe de Leon Jr., chair, National Commission for Culture and the Arts; Mutya ng Pilipinas Camille Guevarra; Emmanuel Borlaza, Movie and Television Review and Classification Board vice chair; Joyce Bernal, filmmaker; and Ma. Carmen Syquia Musngi, MTRCB member. Box-office winner Wilma Doesn’t bagged the best supporting actress award for “Sisteraka,” headlined by Ai-Ai delas Alas, Vice Ganda and Kris Aquino. The movie is this year’s box-office winner. Its listed earnings on the first festival day (it ends Jan. 8) was P39.1 million, closely followed by Tony Y. Reyes’ “Si Agimat, Si Enteng at Si Ako,” which reportedly made P29.4 million. The fantasy-adventure flick, top-billed by Sen. Ramon “Bong” Revilla and Vic Sotto, did not win any award. The Chito Roño horror film “Shake, Rattle and Roll 14: The Invasion” took home one—the best visual effects trophy for Imaginary Friends and Black Burst. Most Gender Sensitive Film award went to “Thy Womb” in the main competition; Will Fredo’s “In Nomine Matris” in the New Wave (independent films) category; and Roberto Pagotan’s “Manibela” under Shorts. New Wave Alan Paule won New Wave best actor for his performance in Ronaldo Bertubin’s “Gayak”; Liza Diño, New Wave best actress for “In Nomine Matris.” Named New Wave best director was Tyrone Acierto for his work on “The Grave Bandits,” which was declared best picture in that category. Special Jury Prize went to Armando “Bing” Lao for “Ad Ignorantiam.” Best shorts were: “Promdi” and “Monthsary” for Luzon; “License to Drive,” Visayas; “Bulgaran sa Daan” and “The Boy the Girl and the Traffic Light,” Mindanao. (Special prizes were handed out for the first time in the festival’s history: Former president Joseph Estrada and Aunor, Male and Female Stars of the Night; Zanjoe Marudo and Bianca King, SMDC Male and Female Celebrity of the Night.) Henry Burgos, accepting his best story trophy for “Thy Womb,” said: “I wish to see changes, even just a little, in the way we Filipinos tell our [own] stories. Let’s continue to support movies that aim to teach and enlighten us.” Later that same night, a frustrated Netizen quipped, “Box-office results show that Filipino moviegoers have not reached that level of maturity.” With Bayani San Diego Jr. Joescoundrel 12-30-2012, 08:12 AM ^ We really should rethink how the MMFF should be done. There is just something wrong when shit like that fag fest movie rakes it in. If it is rally just box office they want, then perhaps we should not ban foreign films during the MMFF at all and just open the tills for everyone. abcdef Les Miserables is a good movie to watch! Watch out for that in the Philippines ;) Joescoundrel Ang Lee’s breathtaking parable kicks off Oscar race By Rito P. Asilo January 4, 2013 | 8:52 pm “LIFE OF PI.” A film of astonishing beauty. “Faith is a palace with many rooms,” declares Pi Patel, the protagonist of Ang Lee’s compelling big-screen parable, “Life of Pi” (showing on Wednesday, Jan. 9), as he explains his multifaceted religious persuasions: Patel’s belief in Catholicism, Hinduism, Judaism and Islam go beyond mere fascination, and grew even stronger after surviving a shipwreck that took the lives of his whole family and set him adrift at sea—for 227 days! Patel’s ordeal happened when he was only 16 years old (he’s played as a teen by the terrific Suraj Sharma), after his father decided to sell the family zoo in Pondichery, India, and migrate to Canada. When the North America-bound freighter carrying Pi and his loved ones sinks during a storm, the precocious teenager suddenly finds himself adrift in the Pacific Ocean on a 26-foot lifeboat. Unfortunately, while his survival skills are impeccable, he has a difficult time getting along with his four “companions”—an injured zebra, a famished spotted hyena, a depressed orangutan, and a cantankerous Bengal tiger named Richard Parker! Food chain It doesn’t take long for Mr. Parker to demonstrate who’s on top of the food chain—but, is Pi smart enough to convince his 450-pound co-survivor that he is more useful alive than as a food source? Lee’s latest cinematic triumph is a film of astonishing beauty. It’s a breathtaking visual spectacle that’s as entertaining as it is thematically significant. At first blush, the story of a dauntless Indian teenager embarking on a perilous journey with a tiger sounds more whimsical than realistic—but, the way the production tells its tale is what sets it apart from this season’s other films. Swathed in gleaming colors, the movie is an allegory for survival and the triumph of the human spirit—and kicks off the Academy Awards race. (Scheduled to be shown on Jan. 11 is Kathryn Bigelow’s “Zero Dark Thirty,” followed by “Les Miserables,” on Jan. 16.) The director makes the viewing experience more “relatable” by deciding not to “Disney-fy” or romanticize his film’s premise—as a terrifying scene involving Pi, his father, Richard Parker and a poor baby goat demonstrates early on. Differences Alas, Pi Patel isn’t Rudyard Kipling’s Mowgli, and Richard Parker is no Shere Khan! Just the same, that’s no reason for them—and mankind, in general—not to tolerate each other’s differences and learn to coexist in harmony. The movie is anchored on real emotions, intelligently and intuitively conveyed by Sharma and the other actors who portray Pi at different ages. Sharma and company invest their roles with subtle shades of humor that help leaven Pi’s core as a curious and impressionable protagonist. This is the film to see in digital 3D—its Oscar-worthy look will remind you of Akira Kurosawa’s “Dreams” and the Robin Williams starrer, “What Dreams May Come.” Moreover, the sparkling images conjured up by Lee’s “magic wand” don’t draw attention away from the story and, in fact, help deepen the relevance of its metaphysical musings. This is evinced by Pi’s encounter with a playful whale in the bioluminescent sea at night, and his adventure on a floating island of lush forests, edible plants, huggable meerkats—and carnivorous algae! Sam Miguel 01-11-2013, 11:29 AM Oscars favorites put spotlight on US history Do you want a US history lesson? Look no further than the frontrunners for the best film Academy Award, announced Thursday. Oscars favorites put spotlight on US history Nearly half the movies nominated for best picture Oscar are about key events in America's past, from the abolition of slavery to the post 9/11 hunt for Osama bin Laden. Steven Spielberg's drama "Lincoln" could also offer a lesson to current US politicians, as the 16th US president schemed to get bipartisan support in Congress. Slavery and the American Civil War era also provide the backdrop for Quentin Tarantino's latest blood-fest "Django Unchained," about a slave-turned-bounty hunter seeking to free his wife from Leonardo DiCaprio's clutches. Historical accuracy is not necessarily guaranteed: "Argo" allegedly takes liberties with facts about the 1979 Iran hostage crisis, and the CIA has blasted the depiction of torture in the bin Laden flick "Zero Dark Thirty." Spielberg's latest movie, which led the field with nominations in 12 categories, tells the story of Abraham Lincoln's drive to secure crucial votes to pass the 13th Amendment, which abolished slavery in the United States. Played with uncanny realism by Daniel Day-Lewis -- frontrunner for best actor -- the Republican president stops at little beyond outright financial bribery to twist Democrats arms into backing the constitutional amendment. Non-Americans might learn a thing or two as well: that it was the Democrats who opposed abolition seems surprising from the modern point of view, as are the political machinations that eventually ended the Civil War. "Django Unchained" is set a few years before the Civil War, when Jamie Foxx's title character is freed by a wandering German dentist turned bounty hunter, embarking on a killing spree typical of the "Pulp Fiction" director. Tarantino justifies relentless use of the "N" word as historically accurate, but that hasn't stopped critics slamming it for linguistic exaggeration, as well as shooting overload, notably after last month's school massacre. Ben Affleck's Iran hostage crisis drama "Argo" tells the story of a CIA agent -- played by the actor-director himself -- bidding to free six American diplomats who take refuge in the Canadian ambassador's residence in Tehran. Critics have included then Canadian envoy Ken Taylor, depicted as playing a clearly supporting role in the plot to get them out of the country disguised as a Canadian film crew. "The movie's fun, it's thrilling, it's pertinent, it's timely," Taylor told Canada's Star newspaper recently. "But look, Canada was not merely standing around watching events take place. The CIA was a junior partner." Oscar-winning director Kathryn Bigelow's "Zero Dark Thirty" also focuses on a CIA agent: the female one credited with tracking down bin Laden's hideout in Pakistan, where US special forces killed him in May 2011. The movie includes graphic scenes of so-called "enhanced interrogation techniques," widely seen as torture, and portrays their role in pinpointing the Al-Qaeda's chief's courier who eventually led to his compound in Abbottabad. That has earned it criticism from lawmakers including former presidential candidate John McCain and from acting CIA chief Michael Morell, claiming the film exaggerates the importance of information obtained by such techniques. A rights group joined those voicing concern Thursday, after the movie's five Oscar nominations. The Center for Constitutional Rights said it was "profoundly disappointed to see that Hollywood is prepared to bestow its highest honor upon a film that glorifies one of the darkest periods in our nation's history. "This should be a moment of national shame and a commitment never to repeat the horrors depicted in the film.... We hope that members of the Academy will vote their consciences and withhold their votes from this film," it said. Bigelow failed to pick up a best director nod Thursday, in what was seen by many as a snub. But her "Zero Dark Thirty" producer and screenwriter Mark Boal -- who worked with her on 2008's Oscar-winning "Hurt Locker," paid tribute to her reacting to the film's other nominations. "None of us would be so honored today without the genius and remarkable talent of Kathryn Bigelow, and to her we are forever grateful," he said. Sam Miguel 01-11-2013, 11:33 AM Spielberg, Ang Lee tipped as Oscar nods revealed Steven Spielberg is hoping for good news Thursday as Oscar nominees are unveiled, with his "Lincoln" among frontrunners, albeit in a wide field as Hollywood's awards season enters the home straight. Taiwan-born Ang Lee's "Life of Pi" and Osama bin Laden manhunt movie "Zero Dark Thirty" by Oscar-winner Kathryn Bigelow are also expected to rack up Academy Award nods, as is actor-director Ben Affleck's Iran hostage drama "Argo." Amid no overwhelming favorite so far -- Quentin Tarantino's "Django Unchained" and musical "Les Miserables" are also in the running -- Tinseltown is holding its breath for the pre-dawn Oscar announcement. Best actor tips include Daniel Day-Lewis for "Lincoln," Hugh Jackman in "Les Miz" and Bradley Cooper for "Silver Linings Playbook," while Jessica Chastain ("Zero Dark Thirty") and Helen Mirren ("Hitchcock") lead on the actress side. Spielberg's political drama "Lincoln," about the 16th US president's drive to abolish slavery during the American Civil War, already picked up most nods for the Golden Globes, competing in seven categories in the show this weekend. The film has also garnered top nominations for the Screen Actors Guild, Directors Guild of America and Britain's BAFTA awards, in the run-up to the Oscars announcement. Its British-Irish star Day-Lewis will be vying to win a record third best actor Oscar, after winning the accolade in 1990 for "My Left Foot" and in 2008 for "There Will Be Blood." Visually stunning 3D adventure "Life of Pi," about an Indian boy cast adrift with a Bengal Tiger, will be Lee's third bid for Oscars glory after a 2001 nod for "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" and a best director 2006 win for "Brokeback Mountain." The movie secured three Golden Globe nominations, nine BAFTA nods and was on the DGA's five-strong best film shortlist. "Zero Dark Thirty," about the decade-long manhunt for bin Laden after 9/11, has drawn criticism -- including from the CIA -- for its hard-hitting depiction of how enhanced interrogation, or torture, helped find the Al-Qaeda chief. Chastain is widely seen as a best actress favorite for playing a relentless CIA agent who tracked bin Laden down to his Abbottabad, Pakistan hideout, while Bigelow could get more gongs to go with her 2009 "Hurt Locker" best film Oscar. Affleck has also drawn fire for taking liberties with historical accuracy in "Argo," about a CIA mission to extract six US diplomats who took refuge in the Canadian ambassador's residence during the 1979 Iran hostage crisis. But the film is up in five Golden Globe categories, and Oscar watchers say it may win over voting members of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences too. Tarantino's latest bloodfest "Django Unchained," with Jamie Foxx as a slave shooting his way to free his wife from Leonardo DiCaprio's clutches, had to delay a red-carpet premiere after a pre-Christmas school shooting in Connecticut. Romcom "Silver Linings Playbook" has also drawn lots of Hollywood buzz, notably for "Hangover" star Cooper but also for being a relatively light-hearted film in a field heavy on drama and history. For Hollywood veteran Spielberg, a best film or best director Oscar would go with his two top-drawer Academy Awards for 1993's "Schindler's List" and "Saving Private Ryan" in 1999. The nominees will be revealed around 5:30 am (1330 GMT) Thursday -- the early hour to fit in with East Coast and other global viewers, waiting to hear who's up for the famous golden statuettes, to be handed out on February 24. Sam Miguel 01-11-2013, 11:35 AM 'Amour' is Oscar foreign film frontrunner Cannes festival winner "Amour" ("Love") is tipped as the frontrunner for the best foreign language film Oscar -- although it may have to put up with digs from Oscar host Seth McFarlane. The film by Austrian director Michael Haneke was among five nominees revealed Thursday ahead of the Academy Awards show next month, along with candidates from Norway, Chile, Denmark and Canada. The heart-wrenching tale of a man and his dying wife won Haneke the prestigious Palme D'Or top prize at the Cannes Film Festival last year, and has long been talked about as a possible Oscar winner. But that didn't stop "Family Guy" creator MacFarlane making a provocative joke when he and co-host Emma Stone unveiled the nominees at a pre-dawn announcement in Beverly Hills. "I read 'Amour' was co-produced in Austria and Germany. The last time Austria and Germany got together and co-produced something it was Hitler, but this was much better," he deadpanned. The Cannes prize for "Amour" was the second for 70-year-old Haneke -- he had received the award in 2009 for his Oscar-nominated "The White Ribbon." The other films nominated for best foreign language movie are: "Kon-Tiki" (Norway), "No" (Chile), "A Royal Affair" (Denmark) and "War Witch" (Canada). Sam Miguel Lincoln and trapo politics American style By Benjamin Pimentel 3:43 pm | Saturday, January 12th, 2013 SAN FRANCISCO—Steven Spielberg’s “Lincoln” is the leading contender for top honors at this year’s Academy Awards. It’s an engrossing film and I encourage everyone to see it. The movie offers a compelling way of viewing history, politics and social change that’s relevant to Filipinos. Take the scenes in which members of the U.S. House of Representatives were debating the proposed constitutional amendment that would finally make slavery illegal in the United States. Leading the fight was Thaddeus Stevens, a maverick Republican congressman, who was both an ally and a critic of Lincoln. He was branded a radical. Why? Because he believed all men and women of all races should be considered equal. In 19th century America, that was a radical idea! In fact, to some defenders of slavery who think whites were meant by God to rule over blacks and other races, it’s even blasphemous. That reality forced Lincoln and his allies to be more creative in their political tactics. In their bid to win the votes needed to eradicate slavery, they urged Stevens, who is totally disgusted with the advocates of slavery, to tone it down a bit. How? By backing off his argument that blacks were, in fact, equal to whites. Instead, they wanted him to embrace a vaguer, lamer position: that everyone should be equal in the eyes of the law. Reluctantly, Stevens, played brilliantly by Tommy Lee Jones, gave in. But even as he compromised on his position, he managed to hit back with a vengeance at the extremist opponents of the anti-slavery movement who were eager to pounce on Stevens, Lincoln or anyone who would even suggest that blacks were equal to whites. “How can I hold that all men are created equal when here before me stands stinking the moral carcass of the gentleman?” Stevens snapped. “Proof that some men are inferior, endowed by their maker with dim wits, impermeable to reason, with cold pallid slime in their veins instead of hot red blood. You are more reptile than man… so low and flat that the foot of man is incapable of crushing you.” That was a great scene and I found myself chuckling as I watched it. For it underscored a fact many Americans tend to forget — that there was a time when freedom and equality were limited to a privileged few in a society that prides itself on being the beacon of freedom and equality for all. But then the movie also drives home an equally important point: that throughout U.S. history there have been people like Stevens, who truly really believed in all the talk about freedom and equality, who simply could not stand those who saw themselves as being superior to others and were willing to fight powerful forces of intolerance. And these mavericks, who endured isolation, ridicule, condemnation, often made a difference. Lincoln has been portrayed as a brilliant, but also complex politician, and I was glad to see him not glorified in the movie. In fact, politics itself is not glorified in “Lincoln,” the movie. Lincoln prevailed in his bid to end slavery partly by bribing some of his opponents, including politicians who couldn’t care less if slavery remained part of the fabric of American society. As Stevens said, “The greatest measure of the 19th century was passed by corruption, aided and abetted by the purest man in America.” To win, Lincoln and Stevens had to get dirty. They had to play games with dirty politicians, to engage in what Filipinos would call trapo politics. The conflict was underscored in a scene in which Lincoln, confronted by Stevens’s push for a more hard-line approach, explained his own strategy for achieving victory. “A compass… it’ll point you True North from where you’re standing, but it’s got no advice about the swamps and dessert and chasm that you’ll encounter along the way,” he says. “If in pursuit of your destination, you plunge ahead, heedless of obstacles, and achieve nothing more than to sink in a swamp… What’s the use of knowing True North?” The journey depicted in “Lincoln” turned out to be longer than the people who succeeded in getting rid of slavery in the U.S. expected. Lincoln eventually paid for that victory with his life. And while his triumph meant blacks could no longer be owned as slaves, it took another hundred years for African Americans to win their right to vote and be treated with dignity at least according to the law. But watching ‘Lincoln’ reminds you of how far the United States has traveled. Sam Miguel Jackman Globe best actor, Hathaway best supporting actress Agence France-Presse January 14, 2013 | 11:56 am LOS ANGELES – Australian actor Hugh Jackman won the Golden Globe for best actor in a musical or comedy Sunday for his all-singing role in musical adaptation “Les Miserables.” Jackman beat fellow nominees Jack Black in “Bernie,” Bradley Cooper in “Silver Linings Playbook,” Ewan McGregor in “Salmon Fishing in the Yemen” and Bill Murray in “Hyde Park on Hudson.” In his acceptance speech, Jackman – praised for his vocal skills in the movie – revealed that he almost gave up the starring role of Jean Valjean only a few weeks before it started filming. “Three weeks before we started filming, we had a terrible day of rehearsal. Humiliating day,” he said, adding he told his wife: “‘It’s time. I have to ring (the director), tell him someone else should play the role. I’ve bitten off more than I can chew.’ “My wife talked me off the cliff like she talks me (down) most days. Baby, I will say it in front of the entire world – thank you for always being right, baby. I love you.” Anne Hathaway, meanwhile, won best supporting actress Golden Globe on Sunday for her role as the young mother and prostitute Fantine in musical adaptation “Les Miserables” by British director Tom Hooper. Hathaway beat fellow nominees Amy Adams in “The Master,” Sally Field in political drama “Lincoln,” Helen Hunt in “The Sessions” and Nicole Kidman in “The Paperboy.” Thanking Globes organizers the Hollywood Foreign Press Association (HFPA), she said: “Thank you for putting me, my work in this category with great and gutsy actresses. Amy, Nicole, Helen and Sally. “Thank you for this lovely blunt object that I will forevermore use as a weapon against self-doubt” she added, clutching the golden award. She also paid tribute to fellow cast member Hugh Jackman and director Tom Hooper. “Hugh Jackman, my friend, you are brilliant in this role. I love you. Tom Hooper,” she said. Sam Miguel List of Golden Globe winners Associated Press January 14, 2013 | 12:42 pm Winners of the 70th annual Golden Globe Awards, announced Sunday in Beverly Hills, California: MOTION PICTURES — Picture, Musical or Comedy: “Les Miserables.” — Actor, Drama: Daniel Day-Lewis, “Lincoln.” — Actress, Drama: Jessica Chastain, “Zero Dark Thirty.” — Director: Ben Affleck, “Argo.” — Actor, Musical or Comedy: Hugh Jackman, “Les Miserables.” — Actress, Musical or Comedy: Jennifer Lawrence, “Silver Linings Playbook.” — Supporting Actor: Christoph Waltz, “Django Unchained.” — Supporting Actress: Anne Hathaway, “Les Miserables.” — Foreign Language: “Amour.” — Screenplay: Quentin Tarantino, “Django Unchained.” — Original Score: Mychael Danna, “Life of Pi.” — Original Song: “Skyfall” (music and lyrics by Adele and Paul Epworth), “Skyfall.” TELEVISION — Series, Musical or Comedy: “Girls.” — Actress, Drama: Claire Danes, “Homeland.” — Actor, Drama: Damian Lewis, “Homeland.” — Actress, Musical or Comedy: Lena Dunham, “Girls.” — Actor, Musical or Comedy: Don Cheadle, “House of Lies.” — Miniseries or Movie: “Game Change.” — Actress, Miniseries or Movie: Julianne Moore, “Game Change.” — Actor, Miniseries or Movie: Kevin Costner, “Hatfields & McCoys.” — Supporting Actress, Series, Miniseries or Movie: Maggie Smith, “Downton Abbey.” — Supporting Actor, Series, Miniseries or Movie: Ed Harris, “Game Change.” Previously announced: Cecil B. DeMille Lifetime Achievement Award: Jodie Foster. Sam Miguel Philippine Daily Inquirer 8:51 pm | Monday, January 14th, 2013 The controversy over “Zero Dark Thirty”—specifically, over whether Kathryn Bigelow’s Oscar-nominated movie about the hunt for Osama bin Laden accurately depicts the truth about the use of torture—has revived the old debate about the movies’ debt to the historical record. Another Oscar-nominated, based-on-a-true-story, starring-a-persistent-agent-from-the-Central-Intelligence-Agency movie that takes some liberties with the historical record, is also very much in the news, but except for the occasional critical story or post, Ben Affleck’s “Argo” has largely escaped the kind of scrutiny trained on “Zero Dark Thirty.” I enjoyed “Argo” for the political thriller that it was, but (fair warning, the first of many spoilers coming up!) felt somewhat manipulated by the contrived ending. Every possible angle of a thrilling escape from an airport was included: the last-minute change in reservation status, the encounter with brusque and seemingly uncomprehending guards, the authorities’ timely piecing together of evidence, the belated chase after the passengers in the terminal, the armed-men-in-jeeps-speeding-after-a-plane sequence. As it turns out, none of these airport-escape clichés happened. The most that the American diplomats disguised as Canadian movie-making crew members endured at the Tehran airport in 1980 was a brief, surprising encounter with an immigration official who took all of their passports—and then came back with tea. As Tony Mendez, the CIA agent Affleck himself plays in the movie, recounted in his memoirs: their transit through the airport went “smooth as silk.” * * * Ken Taylor, the Canadian ambassador portrayed sympathetically in the film as the courageous host of the six American diplomats hiding from Iranian revolutionaries, expressed his concern to Maclean’s magazine after the movie came out “that we’re portrayed as innkeepers who are waiting to be saved by the CIA.” In truth, much of the help the Canadians extended to the beleaguered Americans was written out of the movie. The pivotal role of another Canadian diplomat was completely ignored, for example. After several days on the run, the American diplomats finally called John Sheardown, first secretary at the Canadian embassy. Joshuah Bearman, whose 2007 feature story for Wired magazine, “How the CIA used a fake sci-fi flick to rescue Americans from Tehran,” became the main basis for the movie, describes the response of the man the Americans later took to calling Big Daddy: “‘Why didn’t you call sooner,’ Sheardown said. ‘Of course we can take you in’.” Sheardown died two weeks ago at the age of 88; the New York Times obituary remembered his bracing response in a different way: “‘Hell, yes, of course,’ the diplomat, John Sheardown, answered. ‘Count on us’.” Sheardown hosted four of the American diplomats at considerable personal risk. The Times gave a brisk summary of what hosting fugitives at that time meant: “He bought groceries at different stores to disguise his household’s suddenly larger appetite. He bribed the garbage collector with money and beer for the same reason. Surveillance, including tanks at the end of the street, was constant. Strangers knocked on the front door, suspicious calls were commonplace, their car was repeatedly searched.” None of this was depicted in “Argo.” The movie also scanted the official involvement of the Canadian government. The fake passports the American diplomats used were real Canadian travel documents, and acquiring them for use with assumed names was a complicated process. As Bearman writes: “Canadian law prohibits such falsification, but the country’s parliament held an emergency secret session, the first since World War II, to make an exception.” There was more that was left out. “All the documentation to authenticate the diplomats as Canadians, the business cards, credit cards, the passports, the academic credentials, everything came out of Canada” (Taylor, interviewed by Jim Coyle of The Star). A Farsi-speaking Canadian staffer helped prepare the American diplomats for their airport transit through “mock interrogations” (Bearman). And “once the plan was decided on, Canadians ‘scouted the airport, sent people in and out of Iran to establish random patterns and get copies of entry and exit visas, bought three sets of airline tickets’” (Slate’s David Haglund, quoting an irate Bernie Fletcher). To be sure, not everything the Canadians did was up to scratch. In the situation-room scene where Affleck’s character is informed about the fate of the diplomats, the bicycle plan is presented: Essentially, the diplomats in hiding would be provided with bicycles, which they would then ride the 300 miles to the Turkish border—in the middle of winter. As it turns out, the ridiculous plan had Canadian origins; according to Bearman, the “antsy” Canadian minister of external affairs made the suggestion to the US Secretary of State at a Nato meeting, in December 1979. * * * Did Affleck play fast and loose with the truth? The answer must be yes and no. The movie is faithful to the general sense of the Wired story, even as it compresses events and conflates personalities. Taylor would likely disagree that the truth of the situation was fairly depicted. “But look,” Taylor told the Star. “Canada was not merely standing around watching events take place. The CIA was a junior partner.” That the CIA became the star: Is this art or entertainment? Sam Miguel ‘Hansel & Gretel’ tops N. America box office Agence France-Presse January 28, 2013 | 7:06 am LOS ANGELES – A horror-movie twist on the classic “Hansel and Gretel” fairy tale broke out in the top slot at the North American weekend box office, industry estimates showed Sunday. “Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters,” in which the once lost brother and sister have grown up to become grim-faced bounty hunters, debuted in first place with $19 million, according to box office tracker Exhibitor Relations. The supernatural thriller screamed past fellow horror flick “Mama,” which fell into the second slot in its second weekend in theaters. “Mama,” in which a shadowy being trails two young children rescued after being lost in the woods when their parents died, took in $12.9 million. The dark romantic comedy “Silver Linings Playbook,” still riding a boost after its star Jennifer Lawrence scored a best comedy actress Golden Globe, stayed in third place, pushing the Oscar-tipped bin Laden manhunt movie “Zero Dark Thirty” down to fourth. “Silver Linings,” which was in 10th place just two weeks ago before the Globe win, was set to earn $10 million this weekend. The acclaimed but controversial “Zero Dark Thirty” was just behind with $9.8 million in box office sales. Another new release, “Parker,” starring Jason Statham and Jennifer Lopez as an unlikely pair working together on a heist, opened in fifth place, with $7 million in its opening weekend. Meanwhile, Quentin Tarantino’s blood-soaked spaghetti Western tribute “Django Unchained,” which took home two Globes and four Oscar nominations, rose to sixth place, earning slightly more than $5 million at the box office. That put it just barely ahead of the third new release to open in the top ten this week. Star-studded “Movie 43,” a comedy featuring interconnected short films that follow three kids’ search for the most banned movie in the world, earned $5 million in ticket sales. Trailing just behind were Sean Penn action flick “Gangster Squad,” with $4.2 million, and crime drama “Broken City,” at $4 million. And rounding out the top 10 was musical adaptation “Les Miserables,” which took in $3.9 million. Sam Miguel Philippine Daily Inquirer 9:37 pm | Monday, January 28th, 2013 First off, the interview, which, to go even by local reaction, was quite miserable. Friends drew my attention to it last week saying, it had become the talk of the town, or of blogosphere, it had appeared in YouTube and gone viral. That was Ricky Lo’s interview with Anne Hathaway. I watched it, and had pretty much the same reaction as most Filipino viewers. As pretty much everyone knows by now, that interview didn’t go very well, Hathaway sounding a little putoff down the road. Though to her credit, she remained polite and smiling throughout while answering some of the questions with bite. My heart went out to Lo who looked completely lost at one point wondering what had gone wrong. It’s not hard to see, and even appreciate, what he was trying to do, which was to relate his interview to a Filipino audience. But there are ways of doing it without sounding intrusive, or superficial, or “Pinoy show biz.” Some of Lo’s questions could have elicited less than zinger responses if they had been phrased in a different way, or given better contexts. For example, the question about weight loss. You put it in terms of, “How did you lose the 25 lb and how did you get it back?” you’ll get the answer, “I’d rather not talk about weight loss please.” But you put it in the context of American actors going to extremes to lose or add weight to do a role—Robert de Niro putting on all those pounds in “Raging Bull” and Christian Bale and recently Matthew McConaughey becoming emaciated to act out a sleep-deprived and AIDS-ravaged person respectively—you’ll get a different answer. Same concern, but the second is a question about professionalism, the first only about vanity. Again, you ask the question, “Have you ever experienced (what it is) to be hungry, to be poor?” you’ll get the answer, “That’s very personal.” A bit earlier, Hathaway was just talking about the lengths she went to to learn about her character, researching what it meant to be poor in early 19th-century France, and indeed what it meant to be a sex slave at the time. You want to pursue the idea you can always suggest that surely research only goes so far, does the subject have any personal experience to draw from to identify with her character? The second is a question about acting process, the first is, well, just personal. Still again, you ask, “Do you have any special message for Lea?” you’ll get the answer, “We’ve already talked about that.” Because indeed they already had. The first time Lo brought it up, Hathaway enthused over Lea suggesting there was no comparison. Lea was the real singer, she had one of the best voices in the world, while she (Hathaway) was just an actress trying to sing. You bring that up a second time, you’re wearing your hospitality thin. You want Lea, you interview Lea. There’s really no other way you can rephrase the question or contextualize it without sounding like you were rubbing in the comparison. I thoroughly loved Lea’s own take on things, writing from the perspective of the interviewee. She has great advice for interviewers, which is for them to do their homework. The advice takes on special urgency when the interviewee is someone of note and if the interview is being videoed. Part of the homework, or preparation, I would imagine, is learning about differences in cultures, differences in sensibilities, differences in ways of thinking. Or else you’ll end up miserable. * * * I enjoyed the movie thoroughly and am amused by the snobbery of comparing it to the stage versions and finding it wanting. I’ve seen “Les Miz” a couple of times abroad, and I have both the 10th anniversary and 25th anniversary performances, and I can say with much conviction that this is as best as they come. I guess you can always make comparisons between stage and movie if you want to, but you should also be aware of the differences in medium. Nothing shows it more than Hathaway’s version of “I Dreamed A Dream”—Lo is right to praise Hathaway for it, it’s brilliant. That is a despairing song, and Hathaway sings it profoundly despairingly. Hers is easily one of its best interpretations. But it wouldn’t have been so if it had been sung that way on the stage. Not least because it wouldn’t have been heard—all those emotional nuances wouldn’t have gotten through. That’s where you appreciate Hathaway’s statement that she’s just an actress trying to sing. That’s not naturally a disadvantage—in a movie, that can be a perfect advantage. I’ll leave the rest to the potential viewer. I’ll just say here that I’ve always wondered why “Les Miz” has not been translated into Filipino. I’ve suggested it to some people actually, that story is a melodrama (like opera by the way) which could be dear to a Filipino’s heart. Not quite incidentally, you should watch the movie with a couple of handkerchiefs or a box of napkins as you’d be hard-hearted not to be tearful at many moments there. Additionally, the story line does have humongous parallels with our own situation, with our vast divide between rich and poor, with the utter miserableness of our poor, with our student activists/revolutionaries filled with high ideals who once tried to do something about it and perished in the effort. I myself shed a tear or two at “Empty Chairs and Empty Tables.” The theater was fairly full when I watched it, a bit surprising for a musical. Star power might have done the trick. But not being blessed with a sunny disposition, I left wondering if the wet-faced crowd recognized what they saw in film with what they see in real life. I remembered specifically Tolstoy’s story about an aristocratic lady who wept as she felt for the character in a tragedy while her coachman waited outside freezing in the cold. Miserable. By Bayani San Diego Jr. Philippine Daily Inquirer April 7, 2013 | 9:44 pm Bembol Roco candidly recounted that he was not the first choice to play Julio Madiaga, the hapless hero in Lino Brocka’s 1975 film, “Maynila sa mga Kuko ng Liwanag (Manila in the Claws of Light).” The film is currently being restored digitally by the Film Development Council of the Philippines (FDCP) in tandem with the World Cinema Foundation (WCF), chaired by Oscar-winning filmmaker Martin Scorsese. FDCP has announced that the new “Maynila” will have a world premiere at the Cannes International Film Festival in May. “Lino had shot several scenes with Jay Ilagan as Julio,” Roco told the Inquirer. “But when Lino and the producers viewed the rushes, they thought Jay was too chubby.” Madiaga, after all, was supposed to be a probinsiyano (rural lad) who encounters all sorts of hardships in the big bad city. Roco previously had a small role in the Brocka movie “Tatlo, Dalawa, Isa” (in the episode that top-billed Ilagan) and costarred with the director in the Peta (Philippine Educational Theater Association) play, “Hanggang Dito na Lamang at Maraming Salamat.” He related, “We toured the play, and we had just gotten back from Mindanao when I got the call about ‘Maynila’ from Lino.” Instant promotion He was ecstatic, naturally, but fear eventually set in. “I was very insecure. But it worked in my favor because Lino wanted rawness.” Originally, he was supposed to play a minor role, as a callboy. But the instant promotion meant the 22-year-old neophyte had to carry an entire movie on his slim shoulders. Plus, he was practically in every scene. “We had to shoot in different places,” he said. “The provincial scenes were shot in a beach area in Batangas, but the city scenes were far from idyllic. “We shot in the slums of Tondo, in Smokey Mountain—the dump site. It was exhausting, but I savored every moment.” It was an eye-opener, too, he owned up. “Lino captured the harsh realities in the country in the 1970s.” The director took Roco and other actors to an actual construction site in Quezon City, where the Bureau of Internal Revenue building now stands. Second father “Lino insisted on shooting in real places,” he said. “He wanted us to get immersed in the construction site. He encouraged us. “He also gave me one of his old polo shirts. He said it was his favorite.” Roco considered Brocka a “second father.” “I could always run to him when I had problems about work or even my personal life,” he said. “He was frank, open-minded and always objective. He wouldn’t think twice about reprimanding me if he didn’t agree with my impulsive decisions.” As a filmmaker, Brocka was “the best in motivating actors,” Roco said. Like other so-called Brocka babies, he benefited greatly from “acting workshops” that the acclaimed director gave right on the set. “He knew what he wanted from actors but knew their limits, too. He would pull me aside and carefully explain each scene. He would tell me: ‘What would it be like if you lost the woman you loved?’” Roco recalled that, when it was time to shoot a pivotal scene in a decrepit motel along Avenida, Brocka guided him and costar Hilda Koronel intently. “We were sweating profusely because it was hot and the room was cramped,” he remembered. “But it was Hilda’s moment to shine.” Personal drama According to urban lore, Koronel had quarreled with Ilagan, her real-life boyfriend, the night before the motel scene was shot. For Brocka, the personal drama was propitious, as the director was able to harness Koronel’s emotions fully in that dramatic scene, Roco noted. Among all the filmmakers he had worked with in his 37-year-career, Brocka stood out, the actor said. “Lino was a genius, a master storyteller.” As such, Roco expressed elation that Scorsese’s WCF, the movie’s producer and cinematographer Mike de Leon, and the FDCP decided to digitally restore “Maynila.” “I’m honored that Scorsese, a respected director in Hollywood, considered it an important film,” Roco said. “Today’s young people should be able to watch ‘Maynila.’” He cited three reasons for this: “The social problems Lino tackled still exist today,” he said. Moreover, he added, the film has “historical significance because the Manila in the film has changed a lot. For example, Binondo looks completely different now.” On top of this, he said, Manila’s famous neon lights (the film’s titular “claws”) are no more, having been replaced by billboards. Outstanding He pointed out that “Maynila” is the only Filipino film in the book “1,001 Movies You Must See Before You Die.” “It’s heartening that our film continues to be appreciated… then and now,” he said. During its premiere in 1975, the film was given a rousing ovation in the theater, Roco said. “It was received well at the tills, too. It proved that a movie could be a critical and commercial success at the same time.” Sam Miguel ‘Iron Man 3′ has second best box office debut in history Agence France-Presse May 6, 2013 | 8:30 am LOS ANGELES – Super-hero blockbuster sequel “Iron Man 3″ smashed to the top at the US box office with a mega $175.3 million take – the second best opening weekend ever – industry estimates showed Sunday. The film starring Robert Downey Jr as the title character now sits behind just “The Avengers” – another Walt Disney comic book superhero flick- which earned $207.4 million when it opened a year ago. “‘Iron Man 3′ is definitely playing like a pseudo-sequel to last summer’s mightiest flick, ‘The Avengers,’” said Exhibitor Relations analyst Jeff Bock. It “may be the top movie of the summer, unless the ‘Man of Steel’” – an updated take on the ever-popular Superman story set for release in June- “has anything to say about it. The US opening of Iron Man 3 demolished the franchise’s previous debuts, with $98 million for the first movie and $128 million for the sequel, according to industry tracker Exhibitor Relations. In second place for this weekend’s box office was action-comedy “Pain and Gain,” starring Mark Wahlberg and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, with $7.6 million in ticket sales, Exhibitor Relations said. Not far behind was “42,” a biopic about trailblazing black baseball star Jackie Robinson, which made $6.2 million The fourth spot, with $5.8 million, went to “Oblivion,” the post-apocalyptic action flick starring Tom Cruise, followed by “The Croods” – a stone-age cartoon— in fifth, with $4.2 million. “The Big Wedding” – a star-studded comedy featuring Robert De Niro, Katherine Heigl, Diane Keaton and Robin Williams – came in sixth place, taking in $3.9 million. “Mud,” a coming-of-age story starring Matthew McConaughey and Reese Witherspoon, earned an estimated $2.2 million, for seventh place, the film’s first week in the top ten after going into wide release a week earlier. And in eighth, Walt Disney’s 3D fantasy adventure flick “Oz the Great and Powerful” earned $1.8 million, for a nine-week total of $228.6 million. “Scary Movie 5,” the latest installment in the slasher-comedy franchise, took the ninth spot with $1.4 million. Rounding out the top 10 at $1.3 million was “The Place Beyond the Pines,” starring Ryan Gosling and Bradley Cooper in a drama about a motorcycle stunt rider who resorts to bank robbery to provide for his lover and their newborn child. Sam Miguel ‘Iron Man 3′ has second best box office debut in history Agence France-Presse May 6, 2013 | 8:30 am LOS ANGELES – Super-hero blockbuster sequel “Iron Man 3″ smashed to the top at the US box office with a mega $175.3 million take – the second best opening weekend ever – industry estimates showed Sunday. The film starring Robert Downey Jr as the title character now sits behind just “The Avengers” – another Walt Disney comic book superhero flick- which earned $207.4 million when it opened a year ago. “‘Iron Man 3′ is definitely playing like a pseudo-sequel to last summer’s mightiest flick, ‘The Avengers,’” said Exhibitor Relations analyst Jeff Bock. It “may be the top movie of the summer, unless the ‘Man of Steel’” – an updated take on the ever-popular Superman story set for release in June- “has anything to say about it. The US opening of Iron Man 3 demolished the franchise’s previous debuts, with $98 million for the first movie and $128 million for the sequel, according to industry tracker Exhibitor Relations. In second place for this weekend’s box office was action-comedy “Pain and Gain,” starring Mark Wahlberg and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, with $7.6 million in ticket sales, Exhibitor Relations said. Not far behind was “42,” a biopic about trailblazing black baseball star Jackie Robinson, which made $6.2 million The fourth spot, with $5.8 million, went to “Oblivion,” the post-apocalyptic action flick starring Tom Cruise, followed by “The Croods” – a stone-age cartoon— in fifth, with $4.2 million. “The Big Wedding” – a star-studded comedy featuring Robert De Niro, Katherine Heigl, Diane Keaton and Robin Williams – came in sixth place, taking in $3.9 million. “Mud,” a coming-of-age story starring Matthew McConaughey and Reese Witherspoon, earned an estimated $2.2 million, for seventh place, the film’s first week in the top ten after going into wide release a week earlier. And in eighth, Walt Disney’s 3D fantasy adventure flick “Oz the Great and Powerful” earned $1.8 million, for a nine-week total of $228.6 million. “Scary Movie 5,” the latest installment in the slasher-comedy franchise, took the ninth spot with $1.4 million. Rounding out the top 10 at $1.3 million was “The Place Beyond the Pines,” starring Ryan Gosling and Bradley Cooper in a drama about a motorcycle stunt rider who resorts to bank robbery to provide for his lover and their newborn child. Sam Miguel 36th Gawad Urian bets all indies By Bot Glorioso (The Philippine Star) | Updated May 7, 2013 - 12:00am MANILA, Philippines - With no single mainstream film included in this year’s list of nominees for the 36th Gawad Urian, it may appear that the members of the Manunuri ng Pelikulang Pilipino (MPP) solely gave their nod to independent films. Not even last year’s box-office top-grossers or the one that was named Best Picture secured a spot in any of the categories. “Nangibabaw lang talaga yung mga pelikulang nilabas outside the studio houses,” said National Artist for Literature and MPP member Bienvenido Lumbera during a presscon held recently at the 14th floor of ELJ building of ABS-CBN. Also present were MPP president Tito Genova Valiente, Beni Santos, Mario Hernando and Butch Francisco. Baybayin, directed by Aureaus Solito, bagged the most number of nominations with nine including Best Director and Best Film. Mater Dolorosa and the Nora Aunor starrer Thy Womb each received eight nods while Posas and Oros followed with seven. Sisters Assunta and Alessandra de Rossi for Baybayin will be competing for the Best Actress plum with Nora, Gina Alajar (Mater Dolorosa), Jodi Sta. Maria (Aparisyon), Liza Diño (In Nomine Matris) and Shamaine Centenera-Buencamino (Requieme). And compared to previous years, the number of nominees under each category in this year’s list has noticeably increased. Sixteen nominees made it to the Best Cinematography category, 14 in Best Screenplay and 13 in Best Director. Valiente shared that he and the rest of MPP members had a hard time trimming the number down during the discussion. “Actually, sa dami ng napanood namin ang hirap i-trim down because at a certain point parang nasayangan kami i-drop yung ibang entries. On the one hand, maganda din kasi andaming pagpipilian during the process of selecting the winners.” Santos, for her part, said, “Sa lahat ng meeting namin, I don’t think we had the impression that these are many. From the start, I thought we were just fine with the numbers we got; there’s no magic number. I think the process itself is evolutionary. It means we can change (the number of nominees) depending on the number of films we have. Kaya sa tingin ko nung nagpasya kami at naibigan yung mga pelikula na yun, wala sa usapan na mag-eight, seven o 10 lang tayo. It depends on the kind of harvest we get per year and I think we have a good harvest this year.” Here’s the official list of nominees for this year’s Gawad Urian: Best Film — Ang Paglalakbay ng mga Bituin sa Gabing Madilim; Baybayin; Bwakaw; Colossal; Diablo; Florentina Ubaldo, CTE;Mater Dolorosa; Oros; Posas; and Thy Womb Best Director — Arnel Mardoquio (Ang Paglalakbay ng mga Bituin sa Gabing Madilim), Aureaus Solito (Baybayin), Ian Loreños (Alagwa), Whammy Alcazaren (Colossal), Mes de Guzman (Diablo), Lav Diaz (Florentina Ubaldo, CTE), Sigfreid Barros Sanchez/Racquel Zaballero-Sanchez (Huling Biyahe), Adolfo Alix Jr. (Mater Dolorosa), Maribel Legarda/Maria Isabel Legarda (Melodrama Negra), Paul Sta. Ana (Oros), Lawrence Fajardo (Posas), Emmanuel Quindo Palo (Sta. Niña) and Brillante Mendoza (Thy Womb) Best Actor — JM de Guzman (Intoy Syokoy ng Kalye Marino), Nico Antonio (Posas), Kristoffer King (Oros), Dominic Roco (Ang Nawawala), Eddie Garcia (Bwakaw), Coco Martin (Sta. Nina), Joem Bascon (Qwerty), Jericho Rosales (Alagwa), Bembol Roco (Thy Womb), Adrian Sebastian (Baybayin), Ananda Everingham (Kalayaan), Anthony Falcon (Requieme) and Deuel Raynon Ladia (Anac ti Pating) Best Actress — Assunta and Alessandra (Baybayin), Nora (Thy Womb), Gina (Mater Dolorosa), Shamaine (Requieme), Jodi (Aparisyon),Liza (In Nomine Matris), Ama Quiambao (Diablo) and Olga Natividad (Mga Dayo) Best Supporting Actor — Joross Gamboa (Intoy Syokoy), Carlo Aquino (Mater Dolorosa), Art Acuña (Posas) and Dax Alejandro (Qwerty) Best Supporting Actress — Alessandra (Mater Dolorosa and Sta. Niña), Mylene Dizon and Raquel Villavicencio (Aparisyon), Joy Viado (MNL 143), Clara Ramona (In Nomine Matris) and Annika Dolonius (Ang Nawawala) Best Cinematography — McRobert Nacario and Arnel Barbarona (Ang Paglalakbay ng mga Bituin sa Gabing Madilim), Jun Pereira (Intoy Syokoy), Louie Quirino (Baybayin), Carlo Mendoza (Bwakaw), Albert Banzon (Kalayaan), Whammy Alcazaren (Colossal), Tristan Salas (Diablo), Lav Diaz (Florentina Ubaldo, CTE), Albert Banzon (Mater Dolorosa), Rommel Sales (Oros), Louie Quirino (Posas), Ming Kai Leung (Ang Nawawala), McRobert Nacario (Qiyama), Alex Espartero (The Animals), Odyssey Flores (Thy Womb) and Nor Domingo (Sta. Niña) Best Screenplay — Layette Bucoy and Allan Lopez (Melodrama Negra), Jerry Gracio (Mater Dolorosa), Zig Dulay (Posas), Paul Sta. Ana and Obet Villela (Oros), Mes de Guzman (Diablo), Jun Lana (Bwakaw), Sigfreid Barros Sanchez (Huling Byahe), Whammy Alcazaren (Colossal), Ian Loreños (Alagwa), Henry Burgos (Thy Womb), Lav Diaz (Florentina Ubaldo, CTE), Emerson Reyes (MNL 143), Jeff Stelton (The Animals) and Arnel Mardoquio (Ang Paglalakbay ng mga Bituin sa Gabing Madilim) Best Sound — Diwa de Leon (Baybayin), Addis Tabong and Wildsound Ami (Posas), Wildsound Ami (Oros), Ditoy Aguila (Kalayaan), John Barredo (Qiyamah), Jonathan Hee Kai Chung (Colossal), Mark McCullie (MNL 143) and Willy Fernandez, Bong Sungcang and Ferdinand Marcos Sabarongis (Florentina Ubaldo, CTE) Best Music — Diwa de Leon (Baybayin), Mikey Amistoso, Diego Mapa and Jazz Nicolas (Ang Nawawala), Diwa de Leon with OST-Nix Damn P! (The Animals) and Teresa Barrozo (Thy Womb) Best Editing — Mikael Angelo Pestaño (Baybayin), Benjamin Gonzales Tolentino (Mater Dolorosa), Lawrence Fajardo (Oros), Marie Jamora and Edsel Abesames (Ang Nawawala), Aleks Castañeda (Kalayaan), Dempster Samarista (Alagwa), Chuck Gutierrez (MNL 143), Lav Diaz (Florentina Ubaldo, CTE) and Kats Serraon (Thy Womb) The 36th Gawad Urian awarding ceremonies will be held on June 18 at the Rockwell Tent, Makati City and will be aired on Cinema One shortly thereafter. The cable channel has been the award-giving body’s partner since 2011. “Cinema One and the Manunuri ng Pelikulang Pilipino both espouse progressive filmmaking, highlight emerging and intelligent cinema talent and desire to move Philippine cinema forward,” Ronald Arguelles, Cinema One Channel head stated in the press release. Sam Miguel After Iron Man 3′s wild box office success, get ready for Iron Man 15 Posted by Alexandra Petri on May 6, 2013 at 5:46 pm Well, Iron Man 3 had a wildly successful opening-weekend box office – the second-highest ever, in fact, just behind “The Avengers,” with 175.3 million, putting it on track to be the most smashing superhero threequel of all time. And, of course, trapping Robert Downey, Jr., inside the suit forever. Downey calls himself “one of the best actors” of his generation in an interview with GQ, although he notes “it’s not that big a deal. It’s not like this is the greatest swath or generation of actors that has ever come down the pike.” In the same interview, though, he states that an Oscar is inevitably in his future. The trouble with a superhero suit is that it gives you unlimited powers but, at a certain point, only as long as you wear it. You become synonymous with the suit. Christopher Reeve becomes Superman. Adam West becomes Batman. William Shatner becomes Captain Kirk. You aren’t the guy who plays Spock; you’re Spock. It’s a subtle but meaningful distinction. Robert Downey, Jr., is well on his way to becoming Iron Man, especially if they keep being this successful. Will they ever stop? What does it take to stop them? Wolverine, which almost everyone acknowledges was freakishly awful, kept its claws in Hugh Jackman long enough to force him to come out with Wolverine II, even when he wanted to be running around 19th-century France, singing high A’s. Some people are complaining about the quality of the new Iron Man movie, which is at 78 percent fresh on Rotten Tomatoes, as we speak. But not enough people — indeed, fewer than than the first sequel. It looks likely to bring in a billion overseas. This is quickly turning into Shrek, which started out as the quintessential Fun Fairytale for Kids That Your Parents Will Chuckle Along With but was so successful that in order to put itself out of its misery it had to come out with Shrek 4, otherwise known as Shrek Has A Midlife Crisis And There are Kids And Please Dear Lord Let Us Stop Making These. At the present rate, we are going to wind up with thickly layered Dickensian characters whose lives we know more deeply than our own. Here are some movies we can look forward to. – Robert Downey Jr. stars as Tony Stark in Iron Man 6, where Pepper Potts becomes mysteriously allergic to anything with gluten in it and starts a lifestyle website, and the Internet gets really judgy about it. The main villain is a really weird salad, which Tony must pretend he enjoys. – Robert Downey Jr. stars as Tony Stark in Iron Man 7, where, desperate to end the franchise, Iron Man purposefully destroys the earth and drifts into the vastness of space, everyone he loves having perished horribly. “Are you not satisfied?” he asks. “Please, we’ve run out of plots.” – “I wonder how he’ll get out of this one,” millions of loyal viewers wonder, showing up for Iron Man 8, which pretends that the whole preceding movie was a bad dream and doesn’t really address it satisfactorily at all. Tony Stark stops something from exploding something else, but you can tell his heart’s not in it. – Robert Downey Jr. stars as Tony Stark in Iron Man 9, a musical directed by Baz Luhrmann. – Robert Downey Jr. stars as Tony Stark in Iron Man 10, a straight biopic of Pope John Paul II. – Robert Downey Jr. stars as Tony Stark in Iron Man 11: Day of Judgment, in which self-aware JARVIS is no longer content with his menial role and tries to start the Rise of the Machines, hopelessly entangling two tapped-out movie franchises forever. – Robert Downey Jr. stars as Tony Stark in Iron Man 12, where Tony needs a hip replacement and everyone keeps telling him to slow down. Rhodey attempts, but fails, to mandate a new flying test for superheroes, and he and Pepper cannot get the keys away from Tony no matter how hard they try. – Robert Downey Jr. stars as Kirk Lazarus playing Tony Stark in Iron Man 13: The Artist, a silent film in black and white. Amidst all the confusion, it wins 8 Oscars and scores enough box office to recoup its tiny budget. – Iron Man 14: Amour. Basically “Amour,” but with palladium, the entire movie is in French in an effort to dissuade people from continuing to show up. It is an intimate meditation on love, loss, aging, and the long-term effects of toxic metals. – Iron Man 15: On Iron Pond. (“Listen to me, mister,” says Pepper Potts, “You’re my knight in shining armor. Don’t you forget it. You’re gonna get back up in that suit and I’m gonna be right behind you holding on tight and away we’re gonna go, go, go.”) Another pensive meditation on love, loss, and old age, except for the part where Tony stares forlornly into the audience and whispers, “Please stop coming to these.” Sam Miguel At Cannes, challenging the notion that black films ‘don’t travel’ By Ann Hornaday May 15, 2013 12:23 AM EDT The Washington Post Wednesday, May 15, 8:23 AME-mail the writer CANNES, France — In 1995, Will Smith begged producer Jerry Bruckheimer to let him go to the Cannes Film Festival to promote “Bad Boys,” despite the parent studio’s insistence that a black actor would not get any traction with the international fans and journalists thronging the city’s beach-side promenade, the Croisette. Bruckheimer and Columbia Pictures eventually relented: Smith traveled to Cannes, held a news conference, threw a huge MTV party and charmed dozens of interviewers — and “Bad Boys” earned $140 million, nearly half of it overseas. Smith, who would systematically repeat that model in markets from Moscow to Johannesburg, emerged well on his way to international stardom. As the 66th edition of Cannes gets underway Wednesday, Smith’s example has taken on new resonance — and urgency. For years, black filmmakers, or anyone interested in making movies starring or about black people, have been told that “black doesn’t travel,” the assumption being that the African American experience is too specific to be comprehensible, or commercial, anywhere but in the United States. But some films coming to Cannes this year are poised to challenge the no-foreign-market assumption: “Sexual Healing,” a drama about the personal and creative resurgence of American singer Marvin Gaye starring Jesse L. Martin, will be in the hunt for international distribution at Cannes, its production having just begun in Ostend, Belgium, where the story is set. Producer Frederick Bestall admits that financing was difficult to pull together for “Sexual Healing” and that casting a non-superstar in the lead “has its drawbacks” for international sales. But he’s cautiously optimistic that the film will find distributors outside the United States. Noting that Gaye sold more than 100 million records worldwide and that “Sexual Healing” will center on the singer’s relationship with Belgian promoter Freddy Cousaert, Bestall said, the film’s “human-relationship aspects transcend the concept of a black movie per se. I believe if the story is powerful enough and touches the human-nature side of [the story] rather than the race aspect, the film should do well.” At a time when figures such as Smith, Barack Obama and Michael Jordan are global superstars, the assumption that films by and about black people won’t sell feels counterintuitive, or code for more corrosive biases. “We are stars, we are athletes that are hailed and fawned over throughout the world, our music people are fawned over throughout the world, you would assume the same would apply to our culture,” said director Lee Daniels. “I think it’s some sort of scam. I think something ain’t right in the kitchen.” The perception that black films can’t open overseas has even more impact today, when international financing has become far more crucial to getting films made and foreign box office can account for between 60 and 70 percent of a movie’s total revenue. As foreign markets gain in importance, Hollywood will be even more prone to make movies that transcend language, with explosions, superheroes and special effects that take the place of dialogue. The troubling result is that fewer films will be made and seen, inside or outside the United States, that offer diverse reflections of American life. The film industry is rife with examples of anonymous filmmakers who couldn’t get their project off the ground because their star or subject matter was black. But it’s also happened to some of the biggest players in the business. Last year, “Star Wars” creator George Lucas complained that he couldn’t find financing for “Red Tails,” about the Tuskegee Airmen, for just that reason. “They don’t believe there’s any foreign market [for black films],” he told Jon Stewart on “The Daily Show.” “And that’s 60 percent of their profit. . . . I showed it to all of them and they said, ‘No. We don’t know how to market a movie like this.’ ” The independent drama “Blue Caprice,” which stars Isaiah Washington in a story based on the 2002 Washington-area sniper case, will not be coming to the Cannes market this year, having failed to secure a high-end international sales agent. For years, the conventional wisdom that black doesn’t travel has taken on the force of myth. Increasingly in recent years, it looks like the myth might be beginning to crumble. Not only have films starring Smith, Denzel Washington and Queen Latifah succeeded, but even relatively small films with no big names have done well. In 2011, “The Help” earned a surprisingly healthy $42 million overseas and last year “Django Unchained,” Quentin Tarantino’s slavery-era spaghetti Western, broke all the filmmaker’s box office records. But by far the most impressive groundbreaker recently was “Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire,” which Daniels brought to Cannes in 2009 as part of a far-ranging festival circuit that started with winning a grand jury award at Sundance the previous January. “Precious” featured no international stars to speak of (other than a virtually unrecognizable Mariah Carey) and was set within a highly specific urban American context. And yet the drama was a hit overseas, earning nearly a quarter of its $63 million worldwide gross there. Daniels credits his early experience as a casting director, and later as a producer and first-time director, with helping to establish relationships with foreign distributors. He also notes that by the time he made “Precious,” he had perfected a way of subtly pushing back against the “black doesn’t travel” assumption. “If you study my early films, ‘Monster’s Ball,’ ‘The Woodsman,’ ‘Shadowboxer,’ all had black people in them, but they also had viable white stars,” Daniels said. “Since I came from casting, I understood the concept of the value of African Americans overseas — or what Hollywood perceived to be the value of African Americans overseas — versus the white actors. So I’ve always purposely and strategically mixed it up in such a way that I can get my vision out, and at the same time keep my blackness in.” Daniels’s strategy was never clearer than at Cannes last year: While his lurid Southern potboiler “The Paperboy” was making its wildly polarizing world debut at the festival, he was also drumming up distributors for his next project, “The Butler.” Knowing that the film’s protagonist — a White House butler played by Forest Whitaker — may not automatically garner interest, Daniels larded the production with lots of white stars — including Jane Fonda, James Marsden and Robin Williams — playing White House figures over eight presidential administrations. “They’re really cameos in the film, but they got the movie green-lit, which was very disturbing,” Daniels said of the white actors in “The Butler.” “But it’s okay, because the script is great and it was a wonderful ‘Kumbaya’ moment for everybody who participated.” Both Daniels and Will Smith present models worth emulating, said producer Jeff Clanagan, president of CodeBlack Entertainment. “It will take us to push the envelope,” said Clanagan, who plans to take the Kevin Hart documentary “Let Me Explain” to foreign markets where Hart has toured with his stand-up act. “Our talent has to go over there and support it.” Similarly, Tambay Obenson, editor and chief writer at the film Web site Shadow and Act, noted that black filmmakers need to show up at international festivals such as Cannes, the better to establish the kinds of relationships with film professionals and audiences that held Daniels in such good stead. Some markets hold particularly strong potential: Obenson made a study earlier this year of black-themed films that played overseas and discovered that black American films often did well in South Africa and the United Kingdom. “ ‘Think Like a Man’ did better in South Africa than ‘Jack Reacher,’ ” said Obenson, referring to the Steve Harvey-inspired rom-com and the Tom Cruise thriller. “It made about twice the box office compared to ‘21 Jump Street.’ When people say things like [black doesn’t travel], they’re saying the rest of world is just made up of white people. Look, there’s an entire continent called Africa with a billion black people on it, and not much of a film industry outside Nigeria and East Africa. There are black people around the world who want to see black people on-screen.” David Glasser, chief operating officer of the Weinstein Company, which released “Django Unchained” and will distribute “The Butler” in August, believes that the notion of “black doesn’t travel” is on its way to becoming obsolete. “A good movie is a good movie, and these barriers are coming down,” Glasser said. “It’s all about quality now.” He can point to at least one persuasive example: One of Weinstein’s Sundance acquisitions, the grand jury award-winner “Fruitvale Station,” is a movie by a black filmmaker based on the real-life case of an African American man who was shot to death by a police officer in Oakland, Calif. The film will make its European debut at this year’s Cannes’s “Un Certain Regard” section, with its international distribution territories already sold out. Sam Miguel ^^^ A reaction to the article above - - - FishBulb wrote: 9:41 AM UTC+0800 This is the worst type of article: insinuating racism without backing any of it up. Red Tails received awful reviews and made less than its budget, and didn't even do well in the United State. But no, blame racism rather than the fact that critics hated it and any financing probably saw the stench of death upon it when it was attached to the person responsible for the Star Wars prequels. The writer also ignores Fast and the Furious 6, which has a remarkably diverse cast and which hasn't had any problems securing international financing. The Amazing Spider-Man 2 will have Jamie Foxx playing the villain, and I haven't heard it having any problems getting funding, either. The issues getting financing aren't based on racism - they're based on making movies marketable to a large audience. It's also hard to get financing for dramas and high-minded comedies - they don't translate, either. Every year, there's one or two movies that make a ton of money because they're good and are an antidote to summer blockbusters, but every summer the majority of movies that go international are ones with lots of explosions or broad laughs (or, ideally, both). What's more, we are in the best possible time for marketing movies - if you've got a story, get it on Hulu or Netflix, or even start up a YouTube channel and build interest. Saying that producers won't finance your movie doesn't hold much weight when there are so many options to tell the story. genom222 anyone here in GF excited about the upcoming Superman movie, Man of Steel? Sam Miguel 05-20-2013, 08:56 AM ^^^ I'm not sure what I feel about the upcoming Man Of Steel. Superman has always been difficult to sympathize with as a "character development" or "character study", which I think is what this new movie is trying to do. Superman is well-nigh indestructible, hence the need for such ridiculous things as Kryptonite and the need for a yellow sun, and those things were just gimmicks to make the Mna of Steel seem like someone an ordinary person canr elate with if you ask me. Plus, judging strictly by the trailers, it seems this is yet another pa-drama look at the struggles of someone who is literally the last of his kind, the last of his race. A lot of people make fun of the original modern Superman of Chris Reeves, and yet to me, that was Superman as I grew up knowing him, even Brandon Routh's Superman wasn't as bad as some critics think, rpecisely because he was still very much Superman as I know him. I'm not too sure what this Superman is going to be like. Sam Miguel End of an era indeed ... ‘Archetypal villainess’ Bella Flores; 84 By Marinel R. Cruz Philippine Daily Inquirer May 20, 2013 | 5:40 am MANILA, Philippines—The Country has just lost “the archetypal Filipino villainess,” actress Boots Anson-Roa said of the death of veteran character actress Bella Flores on Sunday. Flores, Remedios P. Dancel in real life, passed away at Quezon City General Hospital, where she was being treated for complications following hip surgery and a stroke she suffered in September last year, according to her daughter Ruby Arcilla. Flores was 84. Doctors at Quezon City General Hospital declared Flores dead at 1:27 a.m. after several attempts to revive her, reported Arcilla. Her remains lie at the Loyola Memorial Chapels on Commonwealth Avenue in Quezon City. “I thank all of her friends and fans. I hope they will continue to remember my mom and her contributions to local show business,” said Arcilla. She added that burial plans were still being finalized. Roa said Flores was a contemporary of her late father, actor Oscar Moreno, in the now-defunct Sampaguita Pictures. She said she became personally close to Flores when the two of them joined Baliksamahan, an informal group of veteran actors formed 10 years ago. “We attended retreats and participated in the group’s outreach projects, along with actresses Susan Roces and Nova Villa,” Roa recalled. “I remember her as someone with a kind soul. People remember Tita Bella for her raised eyebrows and arms akimbo, but what they didn’t know was that she had a great sense of humor. She will surely be missed.” When Flores’ health took a turn for the worse late last year, Roa said the Baliksamahan group got involved by bringing Flores to San Juan Medical Center. “The members took turns going to the hospital to visit her,” she said. “It had been very sad during her last days. She couldn’t communicate with us anymore so we just whispered encouraging words in her ear,” Roa said. “I remember telling her, ‘Tita Bella, kulang lang sa mah-jong ’yan.’” Roa added that Flores and her late mother Belen Cristobal were mah-jong buddies. Flores had hip-replacement surgery in September 2012. She also suffered a stroke that affected the right part of her brain, which resulted in difficulty speaking, moving and recognizing people, Arcilla said in an interview with the Inquirer in February. Flores was born on Feb. 27, 1929, in Santa Cruz, Manila. The top movie kontrabida appeared in over a hundred films since she joined show biz at age 14 in 1950 (“Tatlong Balaraw”). Inquirer Entertainment columnist Nestor Torre described Flores as the “really nasty villainess” who made life a living hell for the little Tessie Agana, a character in “Roberta” (1951). Incidentally, the box office success of “Roberta” saved its producer, Sampaguita Pictures, from financial ruin after the studio was ravaged by fire, Torre added. Flores won a best supporting actress award from the Filipino Academy of Movie Arts and Sciences (Famas) in 1967 for her performance in “Ang Kaibigan Kong Santo Niño.” She was part of many films by Elwood Perez like “Isang Gabi, Tatlong Babae” and “Mahal Mo, Mahal Ko.” She was also seen in the 2003 hit “Crying Ladies,” by Mark Meily. In 2008, Flores received the Diwata Award, given by the University of the Philippines Film Institute, for her extensive contributions to the entertainment industry. The UP Film Institute website called her “irreplaceable, iconic.” She was last seen on TV in the adaptation of the komiks classic “Trudis Liit” (2011) on GMA 7. In 2012, she appeared in Jade Castro’s feature film “My Kontrabida Girl,” produced by GMA Films, and Jose Javier Reyes’ short film “Kontrabida 101: Kontrabida Pa Rin at 84,” produced by clothing company Bench. Flores’ remains lie at the Loyola Memorial Chapels on Commonwealth Avenue, Quezon City. MrM 05-20-2013, 09:11 AM anyone here in GF excited about the upcoming Superman movie, Man of Steel? Balita ko it veers away from the Superman canon. That being said, that makes things interesting for me. Plus, I generally like movies with Amy Adams, hehe. Sam Miguel Hilda Koronel, Lino Brocka take Cannes by storm once again May 19, 2013 | 6:57 am CANNES—If Alfred Hitchcock’s “Vertigo” had Kim Novak, Lino Brocka’s “Maynila sa mga Kuko ng Liwanag” had Hilda Koronel. Both vintage films are featured in the world’s biggest festival, specifically in the Cannes Classics section, currently going on in this coastal city in the south of France. The fest website reported that Novak would be the guest of honor in the premiere of “Vertigo” on May 25. Not to be outdone, the Philippine contingent made sure that it also had a classic beauty at its own red-carpet event—the grand debut of the digitally restored version of Brocka’s 1975 film held last Friday night at the Salle Buñuel of the Palais. As the end credits rolled, “Maynila” was cheered and heavily applauded. Koronel told the Inquirer: “I am elated and a bit sad at the same time. I got sentimental upon seeing onscreen the old friends who are no longer with us, like (the late actor-director) Mario O’Hara. How I wish they could have been here as well.” It was not Koronel’s first time at Cannes. Over three decades ago, she made a splash at the Croisette, where her mentor Brocka’s “Insiang” was screened in the Section Parallèlle/Directors’ Fortnight. Koronel has vivid recollections of that 1978 event. “I stayed only for a few days, but Lino and I were kept busy with pictorials and interviews with French, German and other European journalists.” She told the Inquirer this latest Cannes visit “brought back a lot of wonderful memories.” The highlight of her 1978 trip was Koronel landing on the front page of the daily, France-Soir, upstaging then Hollywood “It” girl Farrah Fawcett. The photo of Koronel, in her Christian Espiritu gown, was considerably larger, compared to Fawcett’s more modest picture. Grand comeback In her grand comeback at Cannes, Koronel, who is now based in Los Angeles, chose an off-the-rack gown from a US store. “Filipino designer friends wanted to make a new dress for me, but we didn’t have time.” She was escorted by her Filipino-American husband, lawyer Ralph Moore, at the premiere. Koronel was flown to France by the Film Development Council of the Philippines (FDCP), which spearheaded the “Maynila” restoration with help from Oscar-winning director Martin Scorsese’s World Cinema Foundation (WCF) and the movie’s cinematographer and producer Mike de Leon. Koronel said she was honored to represent Brocka, a National Artist for Film who died in a car crash in 1991. “It was a momentous occasion … inspiring.” Sadly, De Leon and the film’s lead star Bembol Roco were unable to attend the premiere. Scorsese sent a pretaped video message specially for the “Maynila” screening. In his message, Scorsese hailed Brocka as “a giant, a towering filmmaker whose films were “brave, extraordinary, powerful experiences.” Scorsese said the WCF was “excited” at getting a chance to save a Brocka film. “It’s now very difficult to watch a good print of Brocka’s movies. It was urgent … to participate in this restoration.” The dignitaries present at the “Maynila” premiere were led by FDCP chair Briccio Santos, FDCP executive director Ted Granados, consul to Monaco Patricia Zobel de Ayala, Brocka’s Cannes “discoverer” Pierre Rissient, Doug Laible and Kent Jones of WCF, Davide Pozzi of L’Immagine Ritrovata, programmers Roger Garcia, Jeremy Segay, Benjamin Illos and Paolo Bertolin, among others. Also present were the Filipino filmmakers featured in this year’s Cannes: Erik Matti (whose “On the Job” is included in the Directors’ Fortnight) and Lav Diaz and Adolfo Alix Jr. (whose films, “Norte Hangganan ng Kasaysayan” and “Death March,” respectively, are competing in the Un Certain Regard section). More restoration projects Also present at the “Maynila” screening were actors Archie Alemania, Evelyn Vargas and Bianca Zialcita, cinematographer Albert Banzon, filmmakers Tikoy Aguiluz, Sheron Dayoc and Derick Cabrido, producers Dondon Monteverde, Raymond Lee, Arleen Cuevas, Vanessa Ulgado, and others. The hall resounded with applause at the end of the two-hour film. The most ardent of film buffs lingered in the theater lobby, hesitant to leave. Rissient told the Inquirer: “I hope this would be the beginning of more restoration projects. I know of at least four Brocka films—‘Insiang,’ ‘Bona,’ ‘Jaguar’ and ‘Bayan Ko’—that need to be saved.” Festival programmer Salvatore Leocata of Brussels called “Maynila” a “masterpiece.” Diaz said it had remained “powerful” after all these years. “I first saw it at Coronet Theater in Cubao in 1975,” Diaz recalled. “I was in college then and our Literature teacher at the Ateneo assigned us to do a paper on it. My classmates and I kept debating about it afterward. It changed my perspective on cinema. It led me to filmmaking. It made me realize that film is not merely entertainment. Cinema could also be a potent tool for discourse.” For Alix, “I was looking forward to seeing the film’s climax again. It is one of the most powerful endings I have ever seen in a movie.” He said he first saw the film on VHS when he was a high school student. The restoration project, said Santos, aims to introduce Brocka to a wider and younger audience. “Maynila” will premiere at the Cine Adarna of UP Diliman in June. A commercial release will follow in July or August, said Santos. Brave choice of themes FDCP also plans to release a twin-bill DVD of “Maynila” with Manuel Conde’s “Genghis Khan” (which was debuted in Venice), its first two restoration projects. “Brocka has always been known for being brave in his choice of themes for his films,” said Santos. “He has the discipline and determination to imbue his films with social purpose.” Santos met Brocka in Baguio in the 1970s. “He struck me as humble and unassuming, very respectful and serious about his craft. It was quite obvious that he was gifted.” Santos praised Brocka for using his talent “to serve the Filipino people.” Brocka said that the director’s role was to present the truth, Santos related. “Brocka said he had to make use of reality to confront the people so they wouldn’t become apathetic.” A perfect example of Brocka’s commitment to the cause, Santos said, was “Maynila,” which was produced in the middle of martial law. Santos praised “Maynila” for “shedding light on the plight of the exploited masses, at a time characterized by much danger and repression.” In his speech, Santos said: “It was Brocka’s intention to make a document of this period … But through this restoration, not only did we bring a film back to life; more importantly, we restored a part of the truth for all of us to witness and remember.” MrM 05-27-2013, 03:31 PM It's been a good year for movies so far. Two straight weeks of blockbuster films (Star Trek and Fast & the Furious 6). Earlier this year was Iron Man 3. Coming for the US Summer season is Superman. For lighter movies, we have The Internship, Hangover 3 (interested in this one because of John Goodman, especially coming off his performance in Argo), and Despicable Me 2 for the kids and minion-lovers. Thor 2 is set for November. Sam Miguel CCP holds necrological rites for late National Artist Eddie Romero May 30, 2013 | 8:55 pm MANILA, Philippines—The Cultural Center of the Philippines will pay tribute to the late National Artist for Film and Broadcast Arts Eddie Romero in a necrological ceremony on June 2 at 9 a.m. at the CCP Tanghalang Nicanor Abelardo (Main Theater). Interment will be at the Libingan ng mga Bayani. Romero passed away on May 28 at the age of 88. Proclaimed National Artist for Film in 2003, Romero has been considered as the quintessential Filipino director. With a long career that spanned three generations of film makers, he produced, directed and wrote an impressive and remarkable body of work that includes landmark works “Ganito Kami Noon…Paano Kayo Ngayon?,” “Aguila,” “Kamakalawa,” “Banta ng Kahapon” and “Noli Me Tangere.” Romero was a prolific filmmaker. He ventured into filmmaking at the age of 17 when he wrote the screenplay for the 1941 film “Ang Maestra” for Gerardo de Leon, the influential director later named National Artist for Film. He started his directorial career as a pinch-hitter for de Leon who became unavailable while shooting “Isumpa Mo, Giliw” (1947). Film historians divide Romero’s career into three phases. The first, from 1947 to 1956, saw Romero writing and directing 23 films that included “Buhay Alamang,” “Ang Asawa Kong Amerikana” and “Maria Went to Town”. In the mid-1950s, Romero made his foray into the American B movie genre, making films like “Brides of Blood Island,” “Mad Doctor of Blood Island,” “The Beast of the Yellow Night” and “Black Mama, White Mama” that were successes in the US and achieved cult status. The third phase of Romero’s career is hailed by film historians as his great comeback to filmmaking. He made “Ganito Kami Noon…Paano Kayo Ngayon?”, “Aguila,” “Kamakalawa,” and “Hari sa Hari, Lahi sa Lahi” and other significant films—all of which are part of what is considered a renaissance of Filipino cinema that took place in the 1970s. When Romero was conferred the National Artist Award in 2003, he was cited as a filmmaker “whose life is devoted to the art and commerce of cinema” and as an “ambitious yet practical artist” who “was not satisfied with dreaming up grand ideas.” He found ways to produce these dreams into films. His concepts, ironically, are delivered in an utterly simple style—minimalist, but never empty; always calculated, precise and functional, but never predictable.” Joescoundrel Philippine Daily Inquirer 9:40 pm | Saturday, June 1st, 2013 Triumph has many faces in the celebrated annual international gathering of movie makers and enthusiasts in the south of France. Scoring a nomination, being invited for exhibition, getting there, walking the red carpet like athletes would in the Olympics, having a film sold for foreign distribution and, yes, winning the coveted Palme D’Or—any one of these is sufficient impetus for anyone to take a shot at the dream. Thus, we are within bounds to proclaim 2013 as a “banner year for the Philippines” in the Cannes International Film Festival, even if we didn’t beat our record of a best-director win in 2009 for Brillante Ma. Mendoza (whose “Kinatay” was fielded in the big-league Main Competition) and, nine years earlier, a Palme D’Or for a short by Raymond Red, “Anino (Shadow).” For all the stones cast at Mendoza (the late famed critic Roger Ebert pronounced the Philippine entry “the worst film” in the festival’s history), his victory was a big deal. Until the next Pinoy winner in Cannes, Mendoza and Red will continue to be looked up to by their peers. Filipino independent filmmakers deem the Cannes fest as the one that makes the heart skip a beat. “Always special” is how Adolfo Alix Jr., who landed a slot in the Un Certain Regard section this year with the history drama “Death March,” puts it. Lav Diaz, who competed with Alix in the section pegged as the gathering’s “serious, experimental” aspect, has won the top plum twice (2007 and 2008) in that other dream fest, Venice. Yet, he says, a filmmaker who professes disinterest in screening his/her work in Cannes is a hypocrite. The late Lino Brocka, who became National Artist for Film, was neither a hypocrite nor parochial. He saw what international exposure through Cannes could do for the sociopolitical critique in his now iconic films. In 1979, his “Insiang,” about the revenge of a rape victim in the slums, became the first Philippine film to screen in Cannes. In 1980, his crime drama “Jaguar” was nominated for the Palme D’Or. In 1981, “Bona,” about obsession and oppression, was screened in Directors’ Fortnight and distinguished for its “independent-mindedness” and noncompetitive nature. In 1985, his “Bayan Ko: Kapit Sa Patalim (This Is My Country),” deemed subversive by the Marcos regime, was smuggled out to get to the fest, which had given him a second nod for the Palme D’Or. This year, his “Maynila: Sa Mga Kuko Ng Liwanag,” digitally restored through the efforts of the Film Development Council of the Philippines, debuted in Cannes, in the Classics Section. Brocka’s death in 1991 spurred, more than halted, the Philippine quest in Cannes. The indie community consistently bids for slots there, past monumental production and marketing hurdles, past even the “poverty porn” tag earned, rightly or wrongly, via previous efforts. Little can be done about that; we are a poor country. But to the credit of our indie filmmakers (“independent” means not backed by mainstream studios), we’re almost beyond that sorry tag. While poverty is still the prevalent backdrop for many films that get considered for, and often win, festivals abroad (not just Cannes), it has been creatively woven into other themes, like coming of age in “Ang Pagdadalaga Ni Maximo Oliveros” and satire in “Ang Babae Sa Septic Tank.” Both films went on to win acclaim abroad. More and more, the poverty ingredient is impressively consigned to the background, as in other winning exports—“Busong,” “Harana,” “Bwakaw,” “Boses” and “Thy Womb.” Our indies have been looking beyond merely supplying a perceived demand from the developed world for illustrations of squalor and sleaze. This much is clear to Diaz, whose Cannes debut with the four-hour “Norte: The End of History” was marked by a five-minute standing ovation and declared by at least two foreign critics as the best in this year’s fest. “I make films for cinema,” Diaz says, “never deliberately for any festival.” Our indies have conquered the world, from Australia to Russia to much of the West, except Cannes. That its commercial components—film market, the hunt for distributors and future foreign partners/producers—have not dampened enthusiasm for its artistic aspect says much about the festival’s attraction. But the commercial opportunities are also a prize worth pursuing. Erik Matti’s “On The Job” was exhibited in this year’s Directors’ Fortnight, and the distribution deal that he scored is said to be the biggest ever for the Philippines. The deal guarantees, for one, screening in 12 US theaters in the fall. Yes, we Cannes. And maybe next time: the Palme D’Or of our filmmakers’ dreams. Sam Miguel Welcome revival of a Lino Brocka classic By Luis H. Francia 12:44 am | Thursday, July 11th, 2013 QUEZON CITY—Last week, I was fortunate enough to attend the Philippine premiere screening at the UP Film Center in Diliman of the restored print of the late great filmmaker Lino Brocka’s Maynila: Sa Mga Kuko ng Liwanag. The title has been translated as Manila in the Claws of Light, but I prefer to translate “Liwanag” as “Neon,” as in my view the latter much more accurately symbolizes the temptations of a modern city that both attract and doom all those seeking a way out of cul-de-sac lives, as happens to the two ill-starred lovers in the film who are promdis—from the province. As was Lino, and not from landed gentry either, but from the proletariat, which explains why he had the right instincts and smarts in handling his material, drawn invariably from contemporary urban realities. The restored print had its world premiere at Cannes last May, as part of the Classics section. According to Sineng Pambansa (National Cinema), the newsletter of the Film Development Council of the Philippines (FDCP), three new Philippine films were also screened at Cannes: Adolfo Alix’s Death March, Lav Diaz’s Norte Hangganan ng Kasaysayan, and Erik Matti’s On the Job—a total of four Philippine films, the most ever shown at one of the world’s oldest, and most prestigious, film fests. The restoration of the Brocka classic was a collaborative project of the FDCP, Martin Scorsese’s World Cinema Foundation (WCF), and L’immagine Ritrovata, the well-known restoration laboratory based in Bologna, Italy. Both Briccio Santos, chair of FDCP, and Benedict Olgado, director of the National Film Archives of the Philippines, are to be commended in their labors to bring back to the screen deserving Filipino films that have for one reason or another been out of circulation. Already their efforts have resulted in the restoration of Manuel Conde’s Genghis Khan, though not the full-length two-hour film but the 90-minute version. Maynila remains as powerful and relevant today as it was when it first was screened, in 1975, when martial law had been in place for three years. A beautiful village lass, Ligaya Paraiso (played by a luminous Hilda Koronel) is lured to Manila by the prospects of a goodpaying job by an unscrupulous and predatory recruiter. Ligaya winds up in a prostitution ring, but a Chinese businessman takes a fancy to her and keeps her imprisoned at his Binondo home. In the meantime, her hometown beau, Julio, a fisherman (played by Bembol Roco, in his debut screen role) comes to Manila in search of Ligaya. In order to keep body and soul together Julio takes on odd jobs, including as an underpaid construction worker and, briefly, as a sex worker. In his odyssey through the underbelly of the city we see the slums—and these are real slums, not some back lot or sound stage—in all their squalor and poverty. In the faded colors, the decrepit facades of homes and businesses in Binondo, in the world weariness the faces around Julio exhibit (in contrast to his soulful looks and youth), we sense the moral rot and despair that infest a city that no longer appears noble and seems royal only to those who exploit the masa. Of course, it ends tragically: that famous freeze-frame of Julio with a desperate, haunted look, a man who knows he is about to die. I don’t know if Imelda Marcos ever saw the film, but it certainly would have infuriated her. A woman who ordered walls built so as to screen squatter settlements from Pope John Paul’s view when he first visited in 1981, would not have been a fan of Brocka’s films, nor of other filmmakers more interested in the sound of poverty and misery than in rose-tinted representations of reality. She was said to be equally dismayed by the late Ishmael Bernal’s 1981 noirist Manila By Night. For the film to be screened abroad, the title had to be changed to City By Night. Brocka’s neo-realist sensibility directly opposed her own sense of what film should be. She espoused a philosophy, if it can be called that, that art, particularly cinema, should show the good, the true, and the beautiful, and that Philippine films should make its viewers want to be Filipinos. Not surprising that The Sound of Music was said to be one of her favorite films. Ironically, Brocka’s first film, Wanted Perfect Mother, was partly based on the Julie Andrews vehicle. Brocka was a fearless and much-needed voice not just in cinema but also in the larger society, at a time when martial law meant a curtailment of civil liberties, including of course the fundamental right of self-expression. He co-founded Concerned Artists of the Philippines (CAP) in 1983, since he felt that, artists being citizens as well, they too had a responsibility to speak out against social injustices as well as to represent cultural workers in their struggle to freely express themselves. In such films as Insiang, Jaguar, and Bona, he continued to portray the lives of the hoi polloi struggling to find meaning and dignity in a society that seemed to systematically deny ordinary folk the opportunity to better themselves. Even in the post-Marcos decade, he continued to act as a gadfly. In his Ora Pro Nobis, in my view, one of his strongest films (as is Insiang), the underlying message was that while the Marcos regime had been deservedly swept from office, the new order wasn’t necessarily that much of an improvement, especially when it came to human rights. In part, it reflected his disillusionment as a member of the 1986 constitutional commission charged by President Corazon Aquino in drafting a new national charter, to replace the one put into place by Marcos. He resigned before the final version was drawn up. In 1991, his life was cut short in a road accident, and in 1997 was posthumously named National Artist for Film. Keep an eye out for Maynila, as it will have a commercial run beginning August 7 particularly if you’ve had it with the usual mind-deadening, special-effects-laden blockbusters. Sam Miguel From the Washington post online - - - Eight lessons from summer movies Written by Ann Hornaday Published: August 24 E-mail the writer The summer of 2013 might be remembered best as the Season of the Collapsing Tentpoles. As mega-budget spectacles such as “White House Down,” “The Lone Ranger” and “After Earth” fell apart at the box office, little engines that could — one with a name that was literally “Mud” — proved they could not only survive the competition, but thrive. As we learned last summer, which featured such debacles as “John Carter” and “Battleship,” quality still counts. Studios, which generally avoid movies that are novel or risky or not based on a comic book because they’re “execution dependent,” may slowly be realizing that everything’s execution dependent, no matter the star, source material or special-effects budget. That goes for enduringly reliable family films as well — in the pile-up of animated kids’ movies this summer, the triumphs happened also to be the best: “Despicable Me 2” and “Monsters University.” Those victories, plus a few out-of-left-field hits and misses, made the past few months particularly instructive for anyone willing to pay attention. Before we all go back to school, here are a few lessons learned that Hollywood may want to study up on when it plans our next summer vacation. 1. Even the biggest stars burn out Two of the biggest stars on the planet — Will Smith and Johnny Depp — got rude awakenings this summer when their movies flopped. “The Lone Ranger” proved that a dusty period Western based on a 1930s radio serial — surprise! — won’t connect with young audiences or international viewers, regardless of explosions, spectacular stunts and the magical Mr. Depp. “After Earth” has done better overseas, but probably not well enough to turn a genuine profit. 2. It’s not just about U.S. Even if non-U.S. box-office receipts can’t save a debacle such as “After Earth,” they have tipped the scales in favor of “Pacific Rim,” especially in China: Guillermo del Toro’s science fiction fantasy underperformed when it opened domestically but has more than made up for that in other markets, largely because of del Toro’s instinctively global point of view and knack for cosmopolitan casting. 3.Women aren’t the enemy, Hollywood One of the biggest surprise hits of the summer was “The Heat,” the only big-popcorn movie to feature a female lead (two, in fact: Sandra Bullock and Melissa Mc**Car*thy). And another dark horse can attribute its success to women: Brad Pitt’s zombie chase movie, “World War Z,” went from disasterpiece to Brad’s highest-grossing film, thanks to the women who made up a whopping 50 percent of its audience. 4.Black films don’t ‘overperform.’ They perform, period. With successes such as “Fruitvale Station” and “Lee Daniels’ The Butler,” this was a great summer for African American stories on screen. And they became hits not just because they were good, but also because they were made for modest budgets and marketed with savvy and sensitivity. Like the Tyler Perry oeuvre, rom-coms such as “Jumping the Broom” and “Think Like a Man” and “42” before them, this summer’s films by and about African Americans connected with just the right audiences — whether that meant the Weinstein Co. reaching out to black churches to promote “The Butler” or Codeblack Entertainment, which produced “Kevin Hart: Let Me Explain,” researching Hart’s ticket sales and Twitter and Facebook followings. The result? “Let Me Explain” was one of the sleeper hits of the summer, grossing a little more than $32 million (which, coincidentally, is also the gross from ticket sales from Hart’s last tour). 5.A rising tide can’t lift all boats if the harbor is too crowded. The movie season broke box-office records this summer, earning north of $4 billion. But John Fithian, president and chief executive of the National Association of Theatre Owners, suggests that studios left money on the table by crowding their movies into an already busy three-month period. “Some of those movies would have done a lot better somewhere else. A family title moved from summer to February could have increased its gross. Even some of the popcorn action movies released somewhere else could have increased their gross,” Fithian says. “There are 12 months on the calendar. We continually urge distributors to spread their movies out.” (Hear that, “White House Down”? Or “Croods”? Or “Turbo”?) 6. Ditch the cape . . . “You don’t need superheroes to succeed,” Boxoffice.com’s Phil Contrino says. “If you look at the one studio that had one of the best summers it would be Universal — minus ‘R.I.P.D.’ — and they had ‘Fast and Furious 6’ and ‘Despicable Me 2,’ [neither] a superhero franchise. This idea that you have to take a superhero and make eight movies out of that character is not the only way to go.” That goes for franchises in general: Series installments such as “Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters” and “The Smurfs 2” arrived in theaters gasping for air, but original horror films such as “The Conjuring” and “The Purge” — as well as the literary adaptations “The Great Gatsby” and “World War Z” — defied Hollywood’s tired reboot-sequel-franchise paradigm. (Of course, “World War Z” has reportedly launched another franchise, and the world goes round and round.) 7. . . . And let serious dramas save the day. One of the most profitable movies of the summer was “Mud,” an atmospheric bayou thriller starring Matthew McConaughey in the title role; after opening in theaters in April, it played all summer long, still attracting audiences even when it was available on DVD. Similar successes include “The Place Beyond the Pines,” the midlife romance “Before Midnight,” Woody Allen’s “Blue Jasmine,” the coming-of-age comedy “The Way, Way Back” and the emotionally gripping urban drama “Fruitvale Station.” All of these winners prove that “the audience is really craving classic filmmaking,” says Howard Cohen, co-president of Roadside Attractions, “Mud’s” distributor. “ ‘Mud’ had Matthew McConaughey, it had some ambition, it had some scope, it was accessible for the whole country, it was not culturally exclusive. But most [important], it was a movie for grown-ups, the kind that’s not getting made anymore outside movies engineered for Oscars.” 8. We may be getting over 3-D here, but it isn’t over over there. After a mad rush to convert movies and theaters to 3-D in the wake of blockbusters such as “Avatar” and “Alice in Wonderland,” the 3-D market has matured in the United States. Less than a third of box-office revenue for two of the summer’s biggest hits — “Despicable Me 2” and “Monsters University” — came from 3-D premiums. Says NATO’s Fithian, the success of 3-D “breaks down geographically as well as [by] genre. Three-D did pretty well internationally this summer, but not so hot domestically.” Genre-wise, he says, “family titles, particularly involving young children, aren’t working on 3-D as well as we thought.” Meanwhile, an adaptation of a Jazz Age novel by F. Scott Fitzgerald does gangbusters. Says Fithian, “Three-D’s not going away in the United States, but we have to be more selective in the movies where we expect it to work.” Sam Miguel Twice ‘X’-rated film tops Cinema One fest By Bayani San Diego Jr. Philippine Daily Inquirer November 19, 2013 | 8:01 pm In his acceptance speech at the Cinema One Originals Film Festival awards, filmmaker Jet Leyco sarcastically dedicated the (Currents section) best film triumph of his entry, “Bukas Na Lang Sapagkat Gabi Na,” to the Movie and Television Review and Classification Board. That’s because the film almost got slapped with an “X” rating (it eventually got an “R18”). “We got an ‘X’ in the first and second reviews,” Leyco told the Inquirer. “We explained our intention and [the board] allowed us to practice self-regulation. We had no time to reedit, so we just adjusted the projection of that particular scene.” “Bukas” also won best screenplay for Leyco and novelist Norman Wilwayco. “The entire team’s efforts paid off,” said the director. “Our kind of cinema was recognized, particularly how we view history and politics.” Jury prize Arnel Mardoquio’s “Riddles of My Homecoming” won jury prize and four other trophies: best director, music (Gauss Obenza), production design (Perry Dizon) and cinematography (Arnel Barbarona, Bordie Carillo and Coi Nacario) in the Currents section. (Currents section entries each received a P1-million grant; in the other section, Cinema One Plus, the movies received P2 million each.) Davao-based Mardoquio lauded Cinema One for supporting regional cinema. “Filmmakers from the provinces have a say in this fest.” Still in the Currents section, the best sound award went to Mikko Quizon for Whammy Alcazaren’s “Islands”; best editing to Dempster Samarista for Ian Loreños’ youth thriller, “Saturday Night Chills.” “Night Chills” also won acting prizes for ABS-CBN heartthrobs: Rayver Cruz, Matteo Guidicelli and Joseph Marco shared best actor honors; David Chua, best supporting actor. Chua saw the unexpected win as a reward for his perseverance. “I was jobless for years,” he said. “The award tells me I can make it in this business.” Dream come true Guidicelli admitted: “It’s a dream come true. I often won in car races but I never thought I’d ever get an acting award.” Cruz similarly expressed elation. “It’s my first acting award. I’ll display it in my room to remind me to always work hard.” Cinema One is ABS-CBN’s cable channel dedicated to Filipino movies. The female stars of Ralston Jover’s “Bendor” topped the tilt: Newcomer Anna Luna won best supporting actress; veteran Vivian Velez, best actress. Luna’s trophy will be displayed in her bedroom, too, “so it will be the last thing I see before I sleep and the first thing I see when I wake up.” Velez’s trophy will go on top of her piano. “This is surreal,” she said. “After so many years… and this is my first indie, a good comeback movie for me. The role is so different, raw and unglamorous.” Veterans hogged the acting prizes in the Plus section as well. Director Peque Gallaga won best supporting actor for Keith Sicat’s “Woman of the Ruins.” “I’m not quite sure how to respond,” Gallaga told the Philippine Daily Inquirer. “It’s always good to be appreciated and validated. I’ll probably get more acting offers… many of which I won’t be able to give justice to. I will never be an Eddie Garcia.” Gallaga plans to donate his award, like his past trophies, to the library of De La Salle University on Taft Avenue. She’s got it, too Best supporting actress went to Bing Pimentel for Borgy Torre’s “Kabisera.” She could retire now, she said. “But my son (acclaimed actor Sid Lucero) thinks this is only the beginning for me.” Pimentel jested that the trophy was proof her children (Lucero and Max Eigenmann) had inherited a little acting talent from her, too… “not just from their dad (Mark Gil).” Industry stalwart Joel Torre was proclaimed best actor for “Kabisera.” Said Torre: “This award is special because my nephew directed this film and also won best director.” Torre, who hails from Bacolod, dedicated his victory “to the people of Bohol, Cebu, Leyte and Samar, who are recovering from recent calamities.” His nephew said the best director triumph showed that even “indies could be genre films, too.” Lion’s share Kapamilya star Angelica Panganiban, best actress winner, said she jumped onboard for Adolfo Alix Jr.’s “Alamat ni China Doll” because she got antsy after being unemployed for some time. “I was clueless about acting in an indie film.” “China Doll” won a lion’s share: best sound (Mark Locsin, Dante Cuanico, Mike Idioma and Alex Tomboc), music (Lav Diaz), editing (Charliebebs Gohetia) and cinematography (Albert Banzon). Said Alix: “The best film win is for my second family, my crew… a pat on the back for their hard work.” Best production design went to Marielle Hizon for “Blue Bustamante”; Mes de Guzman’s “Sitio” won best screenplay and jury prize in the Plus section. “I gave this film a different treatment—it’s like a mystery thriller,” De Guzman said. “I wasn’t sure it would get noticed.” Audience award went to “Woman of the Ruins”; best short to “Magic Touch” by Roxanne Robes, Leizl Senarita and Hershelyn Dimapilis, students from the University of the East-Caloocan, who were mentored by Ruel S. Bayani. Lifetime achievement The Philippine Cinema Original awards for lifetime achievement were given to filmmaker Elwood Perez and producer Lily Monteverde. “This comes at a time when I need it most, now that I’m at a crossroads,” Perez said. He said sharing the honor with his longtime producer was a fitting celebration of their partnership, which churned out such iconic films as “Problem Child,” “Ibulong Mo sa Diyos” and “Bilangin ang Bituin sa Langit,” among others, in the 1970s and 1980s. “She gave me free rein during that era of fabulous filmmaking,” said Perez. Monteverde returned the compliment, saying she learned a lot from collaborating with directors like Perez. “I gave them freedom because I believed in their talent.” Among the previous Philippine Cinema Original honorees are Lav Diaz, Brillante Ma. Mendoza, Danny Zialcita, Nora Aunor, Mario O’Hara, Celso Ad. Castillo and Gallaga. Sam Miguel ‘Lawrence of Arabia’ star Peter O’Toole dead at 81 Associated Press December 16, 2013 | 8:17 am LONDON— Stage and screen actor Peter O’Toole, known on the one hand for his starring role in “Lawrence of Arabia,” leading tribesmen in daring attacks across the desert wastes, and on the other for his headlong charges into drunken debauchery, died Saturday at age 81, following a long bout with illness. O’Toole was one of the most magnetic, charismatic and fun figures in British acting. O’Toole, who died at the private Wellington Hospital in London, was nominated a record eight times for an Academy Award without taking home a single statue. He was fearsomely handsome, with burning blue eyes and a penchant for hard living which long outlived his decision to give up alcohol. Broadcaster Michael Parkinson told Sky News television it was hard to be too sad about his passing. “Peter didn’t leave much of life unlived, did he?” he said. A reformed—but unrepentant—hell-raiser, O’Toole long suffered from ill health. Always thin, he had grown wraithlike in later years, his famously handsome face eroded by years of outrageous drinking. But nothing diminished his flamboyant manner and candor. “If you can’t do something willingly and joyfully, then don’t do it,” he once said. “If you give up drinking, don’t go moaning about it; go back on the bottle. Do. As. Thou. Wilt.” International stardom O’Toole began his acting career as one of the most exciting young talents on the British stage. His 1955 “Hamlet,” at the Bristol Old Vic, was critically acclaimed. International stardom came in David Lean’s epic “Lawrence of Arabia.” With only a few minor movie roles behind him, O’Toole was unknown to most moviegoers when they first saw him as T.E. Lawrence, the mythic British World War I soldier and scholar who led an Arab rebellion against the Turks. His sensitive portrayal of Lawrence’s complex character garnered O’Toole his first Oscar nomination, and the spectacularly photographed desert epic remains his best known role. O’Toole was tall, fair and strikingly handsome, and the image of his bright blue eyes peering out of an Arab headdress in Lean’s film was unforgettable. Playwright Noel Coward once said that if O’Toole had been any prettier, they would have had to call the movie “Florence of Arabia.” Prime Minister David Cameron said Sunday the movie was his favorite film, calling O’Toole’s performance “stunning.” In 1964′s “Becket,” O’Toole played King Henry II to Richard Burton’s Thomas Becket, and won another Oscar nomination. Burton shared O’Toole’s fondness for drinking, and their off-set carousing made headlines. O’Toole played Henry again in 1968 in “The Lion in Winter,” opposite Katharine Hepburn, for his third Oscar nomination. Four more nominations followed: in 1968 for “Goodbye, Mr. Chips,” in 1971 for “The Ruling Class,” in 1980 for “The Stunt Man,” and in 1982 for “My Favorite Year.” It was almost a quarter-century before he received his eighth and last, for “Venus.” Seamus Peter O’Toole was born Aug. 2, 1932, the son of Irish bookie Patrick “Spats” O’Toole and his wife, Constance. There is some question about whether Peter was born in Connemara, Ireland, or in Leeds, northern England, where he grew up, but he maintained close links to Ireland, even befriending the country’s now-president, Michael D. Higgins. Ireland and the world have “lost one of the giants of film and theater,” Higgins said in a statement. After a teenage foray into journalism at the Yorkshire Evening Post and national military service with the navy, a young O’Toole auditioned for the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art and won a scholarship. He went from there to the Bristol Old Vic and soon was on his way to stardom, helped along by an early success in 1959 at London’s Royal Court Theatre in “The Long and The Short and The Tall.” Serious health problems The image of the renegade hell-raiser stayed with O’Toole for decades, although he gave up drinking in 1975 following serious health problems and major surgery. He did not, however, give up smoking unfiltered Gauloises cigarettes in an ebony holder. That and his penchant for green socks, voluminous overcoats and trailing scarves lent him a rakish air and suited his fondness for drama in the old-fashioned “bravura” manner. A month before his 80th birthday in 2012, O’Toole announced his retirement from a career that he said had fulfilled him emotionally and financially, bringing “me together with fine people, good companions with whom I’ve shared the inevitable lot of all actors: flops and hits.” “However, it’s my belief that one should decide for oneself when it is time to end one’s stay,” he said. “So I bid the profession a dry-eyed and profoundly grateful farewell.” In retirement, O’Toole said he would focus on the third volume of his memoirs. Good parts were sometimes few and far between, but “I take whatever good part comes along,” O’Toole told The Independent on Sunday newspaper in 1990. “And if there isn’t a good part, then I do anything, just to pay the rent. Money is always a pressure. And waiting for the right part—you could wait forever. So I turn up and do the best I can.” The 1980 “Macbeth” in which he starred was a critical disaster of heroic proportions. But it played to sellout audiences, largely because the savaging by the critics brought out the curiosity seekers. “The thought of it makes my nose bleed,” he said years later. In 1989, however, O’Toole had a big stage success with “Jeffrey Bernard is Unwell,” a comedy about his old drinking buddy, the legendary layabout and ladies’ man who wrote The Spectator magazine’s weekly “Low Life” column when he was sober enough to do so. Honorary Oscar The honorary Oscar came 20 years after his seventh nomination for “My Favorite Year.” By then it seemed a safe bet that O’Toole’s prospects for another nomination were slim. He was still working regularly, but in smaller roles unlikely to earn awards attention. O’Toole graciously accepted the honorary award, quipping, “Always a bridesmaid, never a bride, my foot,” as he clutched his Oscar statuette. He had nearly turned down the award, sending a letter asking that the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences hold off on the honorary Oscar until he turned 80. Hoping another Oscar-worthy role would come his way, O’Toole wrote: “I am still in the game and might win the bugger outright.” The last chance came in, for “Venus,” in which he played a lecherous old actor consigned to roles as feeble-minded royals or aged men on their death beds. By failing again to win, he broke the tie for futility which had been shared with Richard Burton, his old drinking buddy. O’Toole divorced Welsh actress Sian Phillips in 1979, after 19 years of marriage. The couple had two daughters, Kate and Pat. A brief relationship with American model Karen Somerville led to the birth of his son Lorcan in 1983, and a change of lifestyle for O’Toole. After a long custody battle, a US judge ruled Somerville should have her son during school vacations, and O’Toole would have custody during the school year. “The pirate ship has berthed,” he declared, happily taking on the responsibilities of fatherhood. He learned to coach schoolboy cricket and, when he was in a play, the curtain time was moved back to allow him part of the evenings at home with his son. O’Toole’s death was announced by agent Steve Kenis, who said the actor had been ill for some time. His daughter Kate said the family had been overwhelmed by the expressions of sympathy. “In due course there will be a memorial filled with song and good cheer, as he would have wished,” she said in the statement.—Gregory Katz with Raphael Satter Sam Miguel ‘Ang Turkey Man Ay Pabo Rin’ takes a fresh look at Filipino-American interracial romance By Brylle B. Tabora Philippine Daily Inquirer 3:00 am | Monday, December 16th, 2013 Director Randolph Longjas’ “Ang Turkey Man Ay Pabo Rin” is a comical study of a Filipino-American couple trying to cope with one another’s cultural differences. An entry to the Cine Filipino Film Festival last September, “Ang Turkey” is a “mockumentary” that focuses on couple Cookie (played by Tuesday Vargas) and Matthew Adams (Travis Kraft) whose love story is being documented by an online Fil-Am dating site that considers them the best way to promote interracial relationships. Both found love online. Cookie is a single mother from a middle-class family who lives off deboning bangus (milk fish) to provide for her son; while Matthew, or Matchu, is your average Joe, whom Cookie thinks could take her to greener pastures. As they go along, the couple meets oddball people in the Philippines and peculiar customs and habits inherent to Filipinos: karaoke music, superstitious in-laws, questionable immigration laws, unexpected pregnancies and rotating blackouts. And soon the two start to talk about moving to the US and processing Cookie’s visa. But it seems Cookie has some reservations about these. The film also stars Julia Clarete, Cai Cortez and JM De Guzman. The script is written by Allan Habon. Familiar scenario The conception of the story was just something out of the ordinary, Longjas said. “We were in a mall when we were brainstorming for what our entry for Cine Filipino would be,” Longjas said. “Then we noticed a restaurant full of foreigners with Filipino women as their partners. We’ve come to realize that this type of setup is not a surprise to our culture anymore. In fact, it’s a familiar scenario in Filipino families. From there, we’ve agreed that we can explore this type of relationship through injecting a crash and burn humor of the two different cultures.” Longjas said he wanted to reintroduce Fil-Am relationships in a fresh light. “We wanted to offer a reality that we usually despise or laugh about,” he said. “This experimental comedy explores the trials, tribulations, and triumphs of two people on a universal love trip, which does not discriminate against color, stature, age or culture. It is a celebration of the Filipino experience in a foreigner’s perspective, and the realization of the American dream in a Filipino’s eyes.” Ultimately, we shall find out in the film whether Cookie and Matchu’s love found its way despite their differences or eventually got lost in translation. “Ang Turkey Man Ay Pabo Rin” will be shown exclusively at Ayala Malls Cinemas nationwide starting Dec. 18. Joescoundrel George Clooney uses his star power to keep part of old Hollywood alive By Ann Hornaday, Friday, February 7, 8:48 AM E-mail the writers New York — Fun fact about George Clooney: He’s a hugger. Meeting someone for the first time, he brushes right past an extended hand and instead delivers a warm embrace, a gesture that somehow suggests both the proprietary confidence of celebrity as well as its utter dismantlement. He’s dressed in jeans, a chunky gray knit sweater and the weather-proof boots that everyone is slogging around in on this dreary, slushy Wednesday. But even looking like a civilian, Clooney, 52, manages to exude preternatural charisma and self-assurance. There might not be another actor alive who so thoroughly personifies movie stardom, or deploys it so adroitly — as commodity, means of production and public trust. On this day, Clooney has joined his longtime producing partner, Grant Heslov, to talk about their latest film: “The Monuments Men,” about the U.S. Army’s Monuments, Fine Arts and Archives unit that, in the waning days of World War II, sought to rescue millions of pieces of art looted by the Nazis. The film marks Clooney’s fifth directorial effort, and he also stars, heading up a cast that includes Matt Damon, Bill Murray, John Goodman, Bob Balaban, Jean Dujardin and Cate Blanchett. Inspired as much by the wartime capers of the 1960s and 1970s as by true events, “The Monuments Men” represents the kind of film that Clooney and Heslov have been dedicated to making since forming their company, Smokehouse Pictures, in 2006. “Our whole theory has been, let’s try to force-feed the kind of films that aren’t gonna get made unless we make them,” Clooney explained. Working with lean budgets, deferring their own salaries and asking their actors to work for fractions of their going rates, Clooney and Heslov have specialized in the kind of movies that studios have largely abandoned in favor of comic-book franchises and cartoons. Their first film, “Leatherheads,” was a screwball comedy inspired by Depression era classics; “The Men Who Stare At Goats,” which Heslov directed, was a gonzo war comedy. “The American,” starring Clooney as a taciturn hit man, owed its reflective mood and brooding silences to Antonioni; both “The Ides of March” and “Argo,” the latter being their biggest hit to date, recalled the taut political thrillers of the 1970s. Indeed, watching Clooney’s character, George L. Stout, scrambling around Europe trying to save artistic treasures from Hitler’s all-encompassing, destructive clutches, it’s possible to read “The Monuments Men” as an allegory for Clooney’s own mission, as he valiantly tries to save the archaic genres and sometimes risky, subversive material that seems increasingly endangered by Hollywood’s corporate agenda. “It’s hard,” Clooney admitted. “We have deals where we go, ‘So our back end is nothing.’ But [we say], ‘Let’s keep doing these until they don’t let us do them anymore.’ ” When Clooney talks about the back end, he refers to a strategy of leveraging his star power that he didn’t invent but has nonetheless potently reinvigorated over the past several years, agreeing to waive or dramatically reduce his usual $15 million salary in favor of a percentage of the film’s revenues. It was that strategy that allowed films such as “Syriana,” “Michael Clayton,” “Up In the Air” and “The Descendants” to be made, and it’s that strategy that Clooney has adhered to at Smokehouse and, earlier, at Section Eight, a company he started with Steven Soderbergh. As both director and producer, he paid himself $1 to co-star in “Good Night, and Good Luck,” about journalist Edward R. Murrow. (Clooney and Heslov also fund Smokehouse by doing commercials — starring Clooney and directed by Heslov — that air only overseas.) It’s also a strategy borne of what might be called the “After ‘Batman’ ” era of Clooney’s career, which hit a painful pivot point in 1997, when he starred in “Batman & Robin” — for those keeping score at home, the most universally panned installment of the ever-expanding franchise. “I don’t have the same career without that film,” Clooney said simply. “Until then, I had just been an actor,” he said. “I had only been an actor in TV series, and then I got ‘E.R.’ and ‘E.R.’ became this big thing.” His breakout feature roles — “One Fine Day,” “From Dusk Till Dawn” and “The Peacemaker” — all came about because he was eager for the work and what looked like juicy roles. “And then I get a call, ‘Do you want to be in ‘Batman?’ And I’m like, ‘Yeah.’” “With all of those things, it was just me as an actor going, ‘Look at the part,’ ” Clooney continues. “And after I got killed for ‘Batman & Robin,’ I realized I’m not going to be held responsible just for the part anymore, I’m going to be held responsible for the movie. And literally, I just stopped. And I said, It now has to be only screenplay. Because you cannot make a good film from a bad screenplay.” Heslov, who’s known Clooney since they were acting students and who famously lent his pal money to get head shots made when he was first starting out, recalls the “Batman” moment with rueful vividness. “It was the lowest point of your career,” he says to Clooney. “It was brutal,” Clooney agrees. “He took it on the chin,” Heslov said. “And he took it with a sense of humor, because that’s how he does it, but he was hurting. And definitely if you look at his filmography” — “It turns on a dime,” Clooney offers. “It’s like, ‘Okay, I get it.’ ” The next movies Clooney did were “Three Kings,” “O Brother, Where Art Thou?” and “Out of Sight,” directed by David O. Russell, the Coen brothers and Soderbergh, respectively. “Those were all great screenplays,” Clooney said. “And great directors. So there’s an understanding of, that’s what I’ve got to focus on.” The After “Batman” era of Clooney’s career has been a testament to shrewd commercial choices — the “Ocean’s Eleven” franchise was a huge success, and he had one of his famous back-end deals on last year’s science fiction epic “Gravity,” which is approaching $700 million worldwide at the box office. In the ensuing years, Clooney has also mastered the art of celebrity comportment, becoming the kind of old-school movie star that most famous actors today, with their dressed-down play dates and daily-grind trips to Whole Foods, eschew. With features out of the Grant-Gable look book, a rakish motorcycle, an Italian villa and a near-constant string of gorgeous girlfriends, Clooney is our closest thing to a matinee idol of the old school. Even when he’s up to his ears in problems and production details while directing a movie, he’s been known to take time to greet locals who have been waiting for hours to catch even the briefest glimpse of him. Along with Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp, Clooney has made working a rope line less a smile-and-wave quick-step than an improbably moving ritual of connection and magnanimity. “I grew up in Kentucky, and I remember Raymond Burr coming to my home town,” Clooney said. “I understand what it’s like to see someone famous in person. It actually sort of catches your breath, and I understand what that’s like. So . . . it’s a dance you do, and it requires a little bit more patience than you would think, and it requires tuning out things that would really upset you otherwise.” “The Monuments Men” marks a rare foray into optimistic, family-friendly filmmaking for Clooney and Heslov, both of whom are attracted to tough-minded, skeptical, even cynical movies. They made a pact on the last day of shooting, Clooney says, to go back to the dark side for their next project. “We want it to be low-budget, dark, screwy. . . . We want to have those scenes [like in ‘The Ides of March’] in the kitchen with Ryan Gosling and myself, where it’s just as dark and cruel as it can possibly be. We like that world a lot.” (But first, Clooney will star in “Tomorrowland,” a Disney film by Brad Bird that will keep cynicism at bay for at least a little while.) They’re thisclose, they say, to formally announcing that Sandra Bullock will star in their dramatized adaptation of “Our Brand Is Crisis,” which was a 2005 documentary about political consultants exporting their techniques to foreign countries. “We’re not children at this,” Clooney said. “What we do know is that at some point they take all the toys away. And they go, ‘Okay you don’t get to play anymore.’ We understand that. We’re grown-ups. But while we get the toy box and the key to it, we’re going to play with all the toys that no one wants you to play with.” And with that, Clooney heads back out into the slush. One more quick hug, and he’s gone. Joescoundrel 02-13-2014, 01:25 PM Woody Allen's maturity problem The adolescent energy the filmmaker brought to his early movies never really matured into an adult sensibility. By Meghan Daum February 6, 2014 Several months ago, I watched Woody Allen's 1979 film "Manhattan" for the first time since I was in my 20s and for perhaps the 10th time total. "He adored New York City," Allen's character, Isaac Davis, says in voice-over in the opening lines. "He idolized it all out of proportion." Once upon a time, I idolized this movie all out of proportion. Though I was too young to see it when it was first released, I became obsessed with its Gershwin soundtrack and black-and-white, wide-screen cinematography in high school, right around the time I began romanticizing some mythic notion of becoming a New York sophisticate. And in my mind, no one was more sophisticated than the high-strung, Sontagian journalist played by Diane Keaton, who dates a married Columbia professor named Yale before she falls for Isaac. What could be better than wandering around the Guggenheim on weekends and dining at Elaine's and casually mentioning that Mahler is totally overrated? To me, these weren't just characters, they were templates for my future self. They were the exact opposite of suburban teenagers like me. This was a movie for and about the kind of grown-up I wanted to be. But when I saw it this last time, I was only a few minutes into it before I began feeling embarrassed for my younger self. The dialogue I'd practically memorized in my youth now made me cringe in places. Sparkling though it was, Allen's efforts to poke fun at the pretensions of urban intellectuals were far less subtle than I'd remembered. Keaton's character pronounced Van Gogh "Van Gock." She used terms like "textural" and "negative capability" and sounded like a first-year art student rather than a seasoned journalist. Allen's signature ticks and stammers made his performance more cartoonish than nerdy cool. I suddenly realized I'd had everything backward. These characters were not sophisticated as much as they were expressions of what a young, relatively naive person imagines sophistication to be. This was not a movie for adults but for precocious teenagers. Teenagers a little like the 17-year-old in the movie, Tracy, who, in a storyline that would foreshadow Allen's life, was 42-year-old Isaac's other girlfriend. Seventeen was the age I was when my enthusiasm for "Manhattan" probably reached its peak. Even so, I was too busy idolizing Keaton's character to think much about whether statutory rape was a factor between Tracy and Isaac. But watching the film today, I was struck not just by the creepiness of that relationship but also by the utter nonchalance with which the film's other characters greeted it. "I don't think she's too young," says Yale's earnest, seemingly sensible wife as they arrive home from a double date in which Isaac's girlfriend has announced that she has homework to do. Even Keaton's character, a feminist erupting with opinions, essentially regards Isaac's relationship with the girl as an endearing quirk. Granted, attitudes about sexual power dynamics were different in 1979. It's telling that most reviews of "Manhattan" saw the relationship as titillating — even funny — rather than abusive. Still, Allen, realist (albeit sometimes magical realist) auteur though he's purported to be, has always been more the mastermind of his own peculiar fantasy genre, one in which struggling artists live in multimillion-dollar lofts, people use terms like "negative capability" while keeping a straight face, and middle-aged male nebbishes are irresistible to women of all ages. Given those motifs — and given the degree to which they've become more exaggerated over the course of his career — you could argue that the adolescent energy Allen brought to early films like "Bananas" and "Take the Money and Run" never really matured into a bona fide adult sensibility. There's a perverse logic, then, to his fixation on teenage girls. He's in many ways still a teenager himself. I'm not going to dip my toe too far into the roiling waters stirred up by Allen's daughter's statement Sunday that he sexually abused her as a child. There are already far more opinions floating around than facts. But I do think there's something to be said for the ways in which the scandal forces his fans, particularly fans of "classics" such as "Manhattan," to take a hard look at what it was we found so captivating about the worlds he created. Whatever it was I thought "Manhattan" explained and promised, whatever it was I thought I wanted, it was clearly out of proportion to what was actually there. Joescoundrel Harold Ramis dies: Five of his most memorable comedy movies By Oliver Gettell February 24, 2014, 11:41 a.m. Whether in front of the camera, in the director's chair or on the page, the late comedy actor, director and writer Harold Ramis could be counted on to deliver antic humor under-girded by surprising intelligence. Following are five films exemplifying Ramis' signature style. "National Lampoon's Animal House." After honing his comedy with Chicago's Second City improv troupe, including work on the late-night sketch show "SCTV," Ramis began pursuing a film career, with his first script being this 1978 frat-house farce. Adapted by Ramis, Douglas Kenney and Chris Miller from stories published in National Lampoon magazine, the film was made on a shoestring budget and proved to be a box-office hit. With its story of misfit college students challenging stuck-up administrators and spoiled rich kids, "Animal House" epitomized Ramis' interest in stories of rebellion against institutions and traditions. It also catapulted the career of fellow Second City alumnus John Belushi and inspired generations of raunchy comedies. "Caddyshack." Two years later, Ramis made his directorial debut with the golf-club comedy "Caddyshack," which he also wrote, with Kenney and Brian Doyle-Murray. Starring Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield and Bill Murray, the film tells the story of a young caddy (Michael O'Keefe) trying to raise money for college against the backdrop of a snooty golf course. "Caddyshack" was also a box-office success, but its greater legacy is its reputation as one of the best sports comedies of all time. The film would also be the second of Ramis' six films with Murray as either a writer or director. "Ghostbusters." In 1984, Ramis reunited with Murray, this time on screen, for this supernatural comedy about four paranormal exterminators trying to save New York City. Ramis also wrote the movie with costar Dan Aykroyd (Ivan Reitman directed). In the film, Ramis played the bookish, bespectacled genius Egon Spengler, a classic Ramis straight-man role. The success of "Ghostbusters" spawned a 1989 sequel, two animated TV series, merchandise and several video games. Like many Ramis movies, it entered the cultural zeitgeist in a deep way; one can still say "Who ya gonna call?" today and generate instant recognition and reaction. "Groundhog Day." Arguably Ramis' signature film, his philosophical 1993 comedy tells the story of a disenchanted weatherman (Murray once again) caught in a time loop and forced to relive the titular holiday over and over again. The film also marked the first of a string of Ramis' later comedies exploring themes of self-improvement and the search for meaning, including "Stuart Saves His Family," "Multiplicity" and a remake of "Bedazzled." "Groundhog Day" was added to the United States National Film Registry for being "culturally, historically or aesthetically significant" in 2006. "Analyze This." Ramis' first film as a director after moving his family from Los Angeles back to his hometown of Chicago, this 1999 comedy starred Robert De Niro as a neurotic mob boss being treated by a buttoned-down psychiatrist, played by Billy Crystal. Ramis also co-wrote the film, with Peter Tolan and Kenneth Lonergan. "Analyze This" crossed the $100-million mark at the box office, earned a Golden Globe nomination for best comedy or musical, and generated a 2002 sequel, "Analyze That," which Ramis also directed and co-wrote. It was also a relatively rare movie that became a comedy hit by appealing primarily to adults and helped set in motion a string of comedies about the mismatched middle-aged. Sam Miguel ‘Noah,’ revival of Bible epics, finds rough seas Associated Press March 22, 2014 | 8:30 am NEW YORK – In the beginning of their work together on “Noah,” director Darren Aronofsky made Russell Crowe a promise: “I’ll never shoot you on a houseboat in a robe and sandals with two giraffes popping up behind you.” Decades after Cecil B. DeMille’s “The Ten Commandments” and “Ben-Hur,” Aronofsky has renewed the tradition of the studio-made, mass-audience Bible epic, albeit as a distinctly darker parable about sin, justice and mercy. While much of his “Noah” is true to Scripture, it’s nothing like the picture-book version many encounter as children. “The first time I read it, I got scared,” the director says. “I thought, ‘What if I’m not good enough to get on the boat?’” It’s an altogether unlikely project: a $130 million Bible-based studio film made by a widely respected filmmaker (“Black Swan,” ”Requiem for a Dream”) few would have pegged as a modern-day DeMille. In the lead-up to its March 28th release, “Noah” has been flooded by controversy, with some religious conservatives claiming it isn’t literal enough to the Old Testament and that Noah has been inaccurately made, as Aronofsky has called him, “the first environmentalist.” “Noah” is a culmination of the shift brought on by Mel Gibson’s independently produced “The Passion of the Christ,” which awakened Hollywood with its unforeseen $612 million box office haul in 2004. In the time since, Hollywood has carefully developed closer ties to faith-based communities, (Sony and 20th Century Fox have set up faith-based studios targeting evangelicals). Yet the debate about “Noah” proves that it can be tricky to satisfy both believers and non-believers, and that finding the right intersection of art, commerce and religion is a task loaded with as much risk as potential reward. A lot is at stake, and not just for “Noah” and distributor Paramount Pictures. In December, Fox will release Ridley Scott’s “Exodus,” starring Christian Bale as Moses. On the heels of the recently released “Son of God,” the religious drama “God’s Not Dead” opened Friday and Sony is releasing the less straightforwardly Biblical “Heaven Is for Real” ahead of Easter next month. The studio is also developing a vampire twist on Cain and Able with Will Smith. In Lionsgate’s pipeline is a Mary Magdalene film, hyped as a prequel to “The Passion of the Christ” and co-produced by mega-church pastor Joel Osteen. When Jonathan Boch started his company Grace Hill Media in 2000 to consult Hollywood studios on reaching the faith community, the two “really didn’t know each other,” he says. Since then, films like “The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe” and “The Blind Side” have benefited from outreach to churchgoers. “Over the course of those 15 years, you’ve seen the faith community go from almost pariah status or fly-over status to now being seen as an important market,” says Boch, who consulted on “Noah.” ”In my mind, what we’re seeing is another renaissance where the greatest artists are telling the greatest stories every told.” Though Hollywood largely swore off the Bible epic when films like 1965′s “The Greatest Story Ever Told” flopped, the revival dovetails recent trends. Figures like Noah are globally recognizable, and thus easier to market. They come with no licensing fee, and, often, plenty opportunity for flashy special effects. “Noah,” which is being released in converted 3-D overseas, is perhaps the oldest apocalypse story. The story fascinated Aronofsky as a Jewish kid growing up in Brooklyn. He recalls a poem he wrote about the tale as a 13-year-old — and a teacher’s subsequent encouragement — as his birth as a storyteller. Whereas “The Passion of the Christ” was largely made by Christians and for Christians, Aronofsky says his “Noah” (which was advertised during the Super Bowl) is “for everybody.” “It’s wrong when you talk about the Noah story to talk about it in that type of believer-nonbeliever way because I think it’s one of humanity’s oldest stories,” he says. “It belongs not just in the Judeo-Christian-Islamic tradition. Everyone on the planet knows the Noah story.” The Genesis story is only a few pages, with more details on the dimensions of the ark (which Aronofsky held to) than who Noah was. He’s instructed by God — “grieved” in his heart by what mankind had become generations after creation — to build an ark and fill it with two of every animal. After the flood, Noah is referred to as drunk and then banishes his son, Ham — all clues for Aronofsky on the pain of Noah’s burden. Paramount sought the approval of religious leaders, consulting with Biblical scholars in pre-production and doing extensive test screenings (during which Aronofsky and Paramount feuded over the final cut before an apparent truce). But early criticism bubbled up online based on what Paramount vice chairman Rob Moore says is an old, unused version of the script (which Aronofsky penned with Ari Handel). “It has been a very interesting journey,” says Moore. “It’s been highly chronicled along the way, much of which was based upon either speculation or hearsay or old information.” After seeing the film, Jerry A. Johnson, president and CEO of the National Religious Broadcasters, urged Paramount to advertise the film with a disclaimer. Moore acquiesced, adding a warning that “artistic license has been taken.” “Darren, as an artist, had some sensitivity about what that meant in terms of what we were saying the movie was or wasn’t ahead of time, versus letting people experience it for themselves,” says Moore. “But there was such a group of people who had concern about it.” “For the vast majority of people, the controversy will go away,” he says. Johnson still has mixed feelings about “Noah,” calling it “a great plus, minus”: neither worthy of the boycott that Roman Catholics held for Martin Scorsese’s “The Last Temptation of Christ,” nor a film like “The Passion of the Christ” that will have churches sending busloads to theaters. “They got the big points of the story right,” says Johnson. “It’s so counter-cultural today in America or the West to talk about sin, right and wrong, and particularly the idea of judgment — and that is so serious in this film.” Johnson adds that, among other reservations, “The insertion of the extremist environmental agenda is a problem.” Aronofsky disputes that. “It’s in the Bible that we are supposed to tend the garden,” the director says. “To say there’s no ecological side to the Noah story when Noah is saving the animals just doesn’t make sense to me.” Picturehouse founder Bob Berney, who as president of Newmarket Films distributed “The Passion of the Christ,” says balancing artistic license and faithfulness to Scripture is challenging. “It’s a kind of a trap, and you have to be very careful,” says Berney. “At the same time, they are movies, and they have to be really good. I think the faith-based audience, the Christian audience still wants a big, exciting movie.” All the conversation — both negative and positive — may lure audiences to “Noah,” which Moore says will do its biggest business internationally, even though the film has been banned in many Islamic counties where it’s taboo to depict a prophet. He and Aronofsky believe they have a rich history of artistic ambition on their side. “It’s strange that the conversation for a little bit has turned into a controversy about literalism,” says Aronofsky. “What is literalism when it comes to interpreting and making an artistic representation of the text? Is Michelangelo’s David a literal interpretation of what David looked like?” Sam Miguel Actor Robin Williams dead from apparent suicide–police Agence France-Presse, INQUIRER.net/US Bureau August 12, 2014 | 7:17 am LOS ANGELES–Oscar-winning actor and comedian Robin Williams was found dead at his home in California from suspected suicide, police said Tuesday. A statement from the Marin County Sheriff’s Department said the 63-year-old funnyman was found shortly before midday at his home in Tiburon, northern California. “At this time, the Sheriff’s Office Coroner Division suspects the death to be a suicide due to asphyxia,” the statement said. Investigators said that Williams was last seen alive at his residence, where he resides with his wife, at around 10 p.m. on Sunday. An investigation into the cause, manner, and circumstances of the death is currently underway by the Investigations and Coroner Divisions of the Sheriff’s Office, officials said. A forensic examination is currently scheduled for Aug. 12 with subsequent toxicology testing to be conducted. On July 1, Williams visited the 12-step program at a Minnesota facility to recharge after more than 18 straight months of work, according to his publicist. Mara Buxbaum said Williams was “taking the opportunity to fine-tune and focus on his continued commitment, of which he remains extremely proud.” Williams has been open about the challenges of maintaining sobriety. He sought treatment in 2006 when he relapsed and returned to drinking after 20 years. Williams starred in the CBS series “The Crazy Ones” and the film “The Angriest Man in Brooklyn,” which was released in May. He had several other projects in the works, including another installment of “Night at the Museum.” Sam Miguel Actor Robin Williams dead from apparent suicide–police Agence France-Presse, INQUIRER.net/US Bureau August 12, 2014 | 7:17 am LOS ANGELES–Oscar-winning actor and comedian Robin Williams was found dead at his home in California from suspected suicide, police said Tuesday. A statement from the Marin County Sheriff’s Department said the 63-year-old funnyman was found shortly before midday at his home in Tiburon, northern California. “At this time, the Sheriff’s Office Coroner Division suspects the death to be a suicide due to asphyxia,” the statement said. Investigators said that Williams was last seen alive at his residence, where he resides with his wife, at around 10 p.m. on Sunday. An investigation into the cause, manner, and circumstances of the death is currently underway by the Investigations and Coroner Divisions of the Sheriff’s Office, officials said. A forensic examination is currently scheduled for Aug. 12 with subsequent toxicology testing to be conducted. On July 1, Williams visited the 12-step program at a Minnesota facility to recharge after more than 18 straight months of work, according to his publicist. Mara Buxbaum said Williams was “taking the opportunity to fine-tune and focus on his continued commitment, of which he remains extremely proud.” Williams has been open about the challenges of maintaining sobriety. He sought treatment in 2006 when he relapsed and returned to drinking after 20 years. Williams starred in the CBS series “The Crazy Ones” and the film “The Angriest Man in Brooklyn,” which was released in May. He had several other projects in the works, including another installment of “Night at the Museum.” MrM 08-12-2014, 11:02 AM ^ F#%k. This hit me hard. At umpisa ng araw pa man din. My favorite comedian of all time. RIP, Robin Williams. Joescoundrel The Leaky Science of Hollywood Stephen Hawking’s Movie Life Story Is Not Very Scientific OCT. 27, 2014 Dennis Overbye It would be nice if producers of science movies spent half as much time on getting the science right as they do on, say, wardrobes or hairstyles. I’m tired of complaining about this, but we are in an extraordinary run of such movies right now, and I’d love to see one that doesn’t make me gnash my teeth. Last year, “Gravity,” which won seven Oscars, delivered amazingly realistic depictions of space hardware and weightlessness, but bungled the simple rules of orbital mechanics. Next week will bring us not one but two movies with black holes at their core: “The Theory of Everything,” about the early life and times of Stephen Hawking, the British physicist and best-selling author; and “Interstellar,” directed and written by the Nolan brothers, Christopher and Jonathan, about astronauts traveling through a wormhole to find a new home for humanity. (Intriguingly, it is based on work by one of Dr. Hawking’s oldest buddies, Kip Thorne of the California Institute of Technology.) “The Theory of Everything” has a lot going for it. Eddie Redmayne is justly being promoted for an Oscar nomination for his uncanny portrayal of Dr. Hawking and the relentless wasting effects of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, a.k.a. Lou Gehrig’s disease, for which any number of celebrities have lately endured an orgy of ice-bucket drenchings. Millions of people and science fans who have read Dr. Hawking’s books, flocked to his lectures and watched him on “The Simpsons,” “Star Trek” and “The Big Bang Theory” have never known him except as a wheelchaired figure speaking in a robotic voice; for all they know he was always that way and floated down to Earth on a comet, like Venus drifting in on a half-shell. Mr. Redmayne’s performance — from the gnarled, paralyzed fingers to the mischievous spark that lights an otherwise frozen face as he savors a joke or a bon mot — is spot on. The dramatic high point, when he clicks a mouse and the words “My name is Stephen Hawking” come out of a speaker with a robotic American accent, is a genuine creation moment. There were tears in my eyes. But the movie doesn’t deserve any prizes for its drive-by muddling of Dr. Hawking’s scientific work, leaving viewers in the dark about exactly why he is so famous. Instead of showing how he undermined traditional notions of space and time, it panders to religious sensibilities about what his work does or does not say about the existence of God, which in fact is very little. To its credit, the movie does not shy away from the darker parts of Dr. Hawking’s story. It is based on the 2007 memoir “Traveling to Infinity: My Life With Stephen,” by his first wife, Jane Wilde — one of two books she has written about what it was like to fall in love with and then care for an increasingly disabled and celebrated genius. Jane eventually takes up with the choirmaster at her church; Stephen wheels away with his nurse Elaine Mason, whom he subsequently married and then divorced. Dr. Hawking, 72, is said to have signed off, if reluctantly, on a movie that would fill in the personal side of his life. Of all the courageous things he has done, this might have been the bravest: entrusting his life story to an ex-wife. He allowed the producers to use actual recordings of his iconic voice, and after seeing the movie he pronounced it “broadly true,” according to the director, James Marsh, who won an Oscar for the 2008 documentary “Man on Wire.” But when it came to science, I couldn’t help gnashing my teeth after all. Forget for a moment that early in the story the characters are sitting in a seminar in London talking about black holes, the bottomless gravitational abysses from which not even light can escape, years before that term had been coined. Sadly, a few anachronisms are probably inevitable in a popular account of such an arcane field as astrophysics. It gets worse, though. Skip a few scenes and years ahead. Dr. Hawking, getting ready for bed, is staring at glowing coals in the fireplace and has a vision of black holes fizzing and leaking heat. The next thing we know he is telling an audience in an Oxford lecture hall that black holes, contrary to legend and previous theory, are not forever, but will leak particles, shrink and eventually explode, before a crank moderator declares the session over, calling the notion “rubbish.” The prediction of Hawking radiation, as it is called, is his greatest achievement, the one he is most likely to get a Nobel Prize for. But it didn’t happen with a moment of inspiration staring at a fireplace. And in telling the story this way, the producers have cheated themselves out of what was arguably the most dramatic moment in his scientific career. Dr. Hawking had been goaded by work by Alexei Starobinsky in Moscow and Jacob Bekenstein in Princeton into trying to determine the properties of microscopic black holes. That required a daunting calculation that would combine quantum theory with Einsteinian gravity, twin poles of theoretical physics thought until then to be mathematically incompatible. It took months, during which his friends and colleagues were sure he would fail. They propped quantum textbooks open in front of him and then went away, wondering what if anything would come of him. When Dr. Hawking discovered that quantum effects would make black holes leaky, it went against all his intuition and expectations. He spent a couple of lonely months trying to figure out where he had gone wrong, at one point locking himself in a bathroom to think. The penumbra of uncertainty and randomness with which quantum theory endowed nature on the smallest scales would in effect pierce the black hole’s previously inviolable surface. His discovery has turned out to be a big, big deal, because it implies, among other things, that three-dimensional space is an illusion. Do we live in a hologram, like the picture on a credit card? Or the Matrix? None of this, alas, is in the movie. That is more than bad history. The equations on the blackboard appear to be authentic — the movies are always great at getting the design details right — but as usual it misses the big picture, the zigzaggy path of collaboration, competition and even combat by which science actually progresses. By leaving out people like Dr. Bekenstein and Dr. Starobinsky, the movie reinforces the stereotype of the lone genius already ingrained by the media and the Nobel Prizes. In Dr. Hawking’s case the stereotype is compounded by his disability, which causes the rest of the world — especially the media — to regard his every statement as if it came from the Delphic oracle. It also devalues Dr. Hawking’s own work, the months of intense calculation that are required to turn inspiration into a real theory, by making it look easy. Science isn’t easy, even for the Einsteins among us, which doesn’t mean it isn’t fun. “The Theory of Everything” is only a movie, and I should be thrilled that Dr. Hawking is at last getting his due from the star-making machinery of the big screen and that black holes are even part of the cultural discourse. And I am. It is, as Dr. Hawking said, “broadly true.” But at the risk of coming off as a cranky nerd, I wish the moviemakers had been able to hew to a higher authority. Sam Miguel 03-18-2015, 08:00 AM How Ridley Scott’s sci-fi classic, Blade Runner, foresaw the way we live today On the eve of the re-release of Scott's 'Final Cut' at the BFI, William Cook explores the thoroughly modern riddles at the heart of this cult movie William Cook 7 March 2015 In 1977 a journeyman actor called Brian Kelly optioned a science-fiction novel called Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? The book’s author, Philip K. Dick, had been writing science fiction since the early 1950s. He was 49 years old, with 30 novels behind him. He had a cult reputation, but he barely scraped a living. Kelly only paid him $2,500, but Dick was happy with this windfall. He’d written this book for half as much, back in 1968. After five more years, and many rewrites, Dick’s book finally became a film. Directed by Ridley Scott and renamed Blade Runner, it’s now commonly — and quite rightly — regarded as one of the greatest science-fiction movies ever made. Now finally, after all this time, comes confirmation of the long-awaited sequel — directed by Ridley Scott, and starring Harrison Ford again, reprising his leading role as robot hunter Rick Deckard. Ford says the script is ‘the best thing I’ve ever read’. Will Scott’s direction be just as good? Here’s hoping. In the meantime, if you can’t wait for Blade Runner 2 (or whatever they eventually decide to call it), from 3 April you can marvel at Scott’s original masterpiece on the big screen once again, as Blade Runner: The Final Cut returns to cinemas nationwide, courtesy of the BFI. Novelistic in its detail, operatic in its intensity, Scott’s direction still takes your breath away. Yet the most striking thing about Scott’s film — and Dick’s novel — is that they both foresaw the future. After all these years, Blade Runner remains an unforgettable experience. But since 1982 it’s become something else as well — a futuristic metaphor for the way we live today. Dick delighted in making (almost) accurate predictions: nuclear meltdown in the Soviet Union by 1985 (Chernobyl blew up in 1986); artificial life by 1993 (Dolly the sheep was cloned in 1997). Written half a lifetime before the world wide web, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? displayed similarly spooky powers of prophecy. Anyone with a Facebook page will recognise the creepy appeal of Buster Friendly and his Friendly Friends, a never-ending chat show that broadcasts 24/7 throughout Dick’s novel. And anyone who’s searched for instant solutions to their problems in cyberspace (or been prescribed anti-depressants to boost their serotonin levels) will recognise Dick’s Mood Organ, a sly machine that conjures up all manner of emotions, from ‘awareness of the manifold possibilities open to me in the future’ to ‘the desire to watch TV, no matter what’s on it’. As Dick observed, ‘The greatest pain does not come zooming down from a distant planet, but up from the depths of the heart.’ Scott’s movie retained relatively few of these sci-fi specifics, but he preserved the book’s pervasive air of virtual paranoia — its inherent uncertainty about the boundary between what’s real and what’s unreal. Harrison Ford’s Blade Runner hunts down replicants who’ve become too human, and ends up wondering if he’s a replicant himself. Are his memories really his own, or were they implanted by a higher power? ‘It’s not just “What if…” It’s “My God; what if…”’ stated Dick, of his attitude to science fiction. Watching Blade Runner today, you can’t help wondering if his nightmares have come true. What is the meaning of memory, now everything is a click away on Google? Is the internet transforming us into replicants, incapable of proper empathy? Will anything be left of us, once our entire lives are online? Initially, Dick was rather disparaging about Blade Runner (he called it ‘Philip Marlowe meets The Stepford Wives’) but once he saw a rough cut, he was won over by Scott’s film. He didn’t mind at all that the film was so different from his novel. ‘The book and the movie do not fight each other, they reinforce each other,’ he said. ‘The human brain craves stimulation, and this movie will stimulate the brain.’ Dick never made it to the première. He died of a stroke, a few months before the movie opened. He was 53. Ridley Scott had had a big hit with Alien, and Harrison Ford had had an even bigger hit with Star Wars — but despite this winning team of hot star and hip director, the initial response to Blade Runner was tepid. Its first cinematic outing made a mere $14 million, barely half its production budget. The critics were underwhelmed. Janet Maslin of the New York Times called it ‘muddled yet mesmerising’, yet the intrinsic ‘muddle’ of Blade Runner is what makes it so mesmeric, then and now. The film (and the book) is built on an unanswerable conundrum. As robots evolve, at what stage do they become human? And as our lives become more and more computerised, at what stage do we start to become machines? This thoroughly modern riddle is what gives Blade Runner its staying power, but such profound questions were far too tricksy for the film’s money men. The studio imposed various changes, including a corny film noir voice-over, in an attempt to explain away the film’s multiple complexities. Several alternative versions subsequently emerged, of which Scott’s ‘Final Cut’ is the finest, but even the Chandleresque original was a triumph. Scott said he wanted to make a film ‘set 40 years hence, made in the style of 40 years ago’. Thirty-three years hence, it still feels intensely contemporary. The only thing that’s dated is the computers — and the shoulder pads. Fittingly, for a film about the perils of technological innovation, it was new technology that kept Blade Runner alive. Home video was the latest gizmo, and Blade Runner quickly climbed to the top of the rental charts. Movie execs may have been confused by its ambiguities, but movie buffs revelled in them. Within a year, the film had spawned its own fanzine. In 1983, the assembled nerds of the World Science Fiction Convention voted it the third best science-fiction movie of all time. Scott went on to direct a string of smart Hollywood hits: Thelma & Louise, Gladiator, Kingdom of Heaven… In 1992 he made the so-called ‘Director’s Cut’ of Blade Runner — actually a creative compromise between Scott and the studio. In 2007 he made the ‘Final Cut’ that’s now on general release again. After Dick’s death, Hollywood finally woke up to the cinematic potential of his dark vision. A slew of adaptations followed. In 1990 Paul Verhoeven made Total Recall, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, based on Dick’s We Can Remember It For You Wholesale. In 2002 Steven Spielberg made Minority Report, starring Tom Cruise, based on a short story Dick wrote way back in 1956, in his twenties, when he was just starting out. Spielberg’s film grossed more than $130 million. Dick’s original fee for this story was $130. ‘Often, people claim to remember past lives,’ he said in 1977. ‘I claim to remember a different, very different present life.’ Our robots may not be quite up to scratch — not yet — but Philip K. Dick’s Mood Organ is already with us. In the parallel universe of the internet, the different present life that he remembered is not so far away. This article first appeared in the print edition of The Spectator magazine, dated 7 March 2015 Sam Miguel 03-18-2015, 08:00 AM How Ridley Scott’s sci-fi classic, Blade Runner, foresaw the way we live today On the eve of the re-release of Scott's 'Final Cut' at the BFI, William Cook explores the thoroughly modern riddles at the heart of this cult movie William Cook 7 March 2015 In 1977 a journeyman actor called Brian Kelly optioned a science-fiction novel called Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? The book’s author, Philip K. Dick, had been writing science fiction since the early 1950s. He was 49 years old, with 30 novels behind him. He had a cult reputation, but he barely scraped a living. Kelly only paid him $2,500, but Dick was happy with this windfall. He’d written this book for half as much, back in 1968. After five more years, and many rewrites, Dick’s book finally became a film. Directed by Ridley Scott and renamed Blade Runner, it’s now commonly — and quite rightly — regarded as one of the greatest science-fiction movies ever made. Now finally, after all this time, comes confirmation of the long-awaited sequel — directed by Ridley Scott, and starring Harrison Ford again, reprising his leading role as robot hunter Rick Deckard. Ford says the script is ‘the best thing I’ve ever read’. Will Scott’s direction be just as good? Here’s hoping. In the meantime, if you can’t wait for Blade Runner 2 (or whatever they eventually decide to call it), from 3 April you can marvel at Scott’s original masterpiece on the big screen once again, as Blade Runner: The Final Cut returns to cinemas nationwide, courtesy of the BFI. Novelistic in its detail, operatic in its intensity, Scott’s direction still takes your breath away. Yet the most striking thing about Scott’s film — and Dick’s novel — is that they both foresaw the future. After all these years, Blade Runner remains an unforgettable experience. But since 1982 it’s become something else as well — a futuristic metaphor for the way we live today. Dick delighted in making (almost) accurate predictions: nuclear meltdown in the Soviet Union by 1985 (Chernobyl blew up in 1986); artificial life by 1993 (Dolly the sheep was cloned in 1997). Written half a lifetime before the world wide web, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? displayed similarly spooky powers of prophecy. Anyone with a Facebook page will recognise the creepy appeal of Buster Friendly and his Friendly Friends, a never-ending chat show that broadcasts 24/7 throughout Dick’s novel. And anyone who’s searched for instant solutions to their problems in cyberspace (or been prescribed anti-depressants to boost their serotonin levels) will recognise Dick’s Mood Organ, a sly machine that conjures up all manner of emotions, from ‘awareness of the manifold possibilities open to me in the future’ to ‘the desire to watch TV, no matter what’s on it’. As Dick observed, ‘The greatest pain does not come zooming down from a distant planet, but up from the depths of the heart.’ Scott’s movie retained relatively few of these sci-fi specifics, but he preserved the book’s pervasive air of virtual paranoia — its inherent uncertainty about the boundary between what’s real and what’s unreal. Harrison Ford’s Blade Runner hunts down replicants who’ve become too human, and ends up wondering if he’s a replicant himself. Are his memories really his own, or were they implanted by a higher power? ‘It’s not just “What if…” It’s “My God; what if…”’ stated Dick, of his attitude to science fiction. Watching Blade Runner today, you can’t help wondering if his nightmares have come true. What is the meaning of memory, now everything is a click away on Google? Is the internet transforming us into replicants, incapable of proper empathy? Will anything be left of us, once our entire lives are online? Initially, Dick was rather disparaging about Blade Runner (he called it ‘Philip Marlowe meets The Stepford Wives’) but once he saw a rough cut, he was won over by Scott’s film. He didn’t mind at all that the film was so different from his novel. ‘The book and the movie do not fight each other, they reinforce each other,’ he said. ‘The human brain craves stimulation, and this movie will stimulate the brain.’ Dick never made it to the première. He died of a stroke, a few months before the movie opened. He was 53. Ridley Scott had had a big hit with Alien, and Harrison Ford had had an even bigger hit with Star Wars — but despite this winning team of hot star and hip director, the initial response to Blade Runner was tepid. Its first cinematic outing made a mere $14 million, barely half its production budget. The critics were underwhelmed. Janet Maslin of the New York Times called it ‘muddled yet mesmerising’, yet the intrinsic ‘muddle’ of Blade Runner is what makes it so mesmeric, then and now. The film (and the book) is built on an unanswerable conundrum. As robots evolve, at what stage do they become human? And as our lives become more and more computerised, at what stage do we start to become machines? This thoroughly modern riddle is what gives Blade Runner its staying power, but such profound questions were far too tricksy for the film’s money men. The studio imposed various changes, including a corny film noir voice-over, in an attempt to explain away the film’s multiple complexities. Several alternative versions subsequently emerged, of which Scott’s ‘Final Cut’ is the finest, but even the Chandleresque original was a triumph. Scott said he wanted to make a film ‘set 40 years hence, made in the style of 40 years ago’. Thirty-three years hence, it still feels intensely contemporary. The only thing that’s dated is the computers — and the shoulder pads. Fittingly, for a film about the perils of technological innovation, it was new technology that kept Blade Runner alive. Home video was the latest gizmo, and Blade Runner quickly climbed to the top of the rental charts. Movie execs may have been confused by its ambiguities, but movie buffs revelled in them. Within a year, the film had spawned its own fanzine. In 1983, the assembled nerds of the World Science Fiction Convention voted it the third best science-fiction movie of all time. Scott went on to direct a string of smart Hollywood hits: Thelma & Louise, Gladiator, Kingdom of Heaven… In 1992 he made the so-called ‘Director’s Cut’ of Blade Runner — actually a creative compromise between Scott and the studio. In 2007 he made the ‘Final Cut’ that’s now on general release again. After Dick’s death, Hollywood finally woke up to the cinematic potential of his dark vision. A slew of adaptations followed. In 1990 Paul Verhoeven made Total Recall, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, based on Dick’s We Can Remember It For You Wholesale. In 2002 Steven Spielberg made Minority Report, starring Tom Cruise, based on a short story Dick wrote way back in 1956, in his twenties, when he was just starting out. Spielberg’s film grossed more than $130 million. Dick’s original fee for this story was $130. ‘Often, people claim to remember past lives,’ he said in 1977. ‘I claim to remember a different, very different present life.’ Our robots may not be quite up to scratch — not yet — but Philip K. Dick’s Mood Organ is already with us. In the parallel universe of the internet, the different present life that he remembered is not so far away. This article first appeared in the print edition of The Spectator magazine, dated 7 March 2015 Sam Miguel 6 Movie Plots Solved In Minutes With Common Sense By Jacopo della Quercia , Aatif Zubair | January 12, 2016 | 794,858 views The whole fun of movies is that these characters' problems are not like our own. Where our biggest adventures involve trying to chase a cat out from under the bed with a broomstick, these people are running from robot explosions or cross-examining flamboyant serial killers. But lots of times, a little closer look at a movie plot reveals that they were making things way harder on themselves than necessary. #6. X-Men: Days Of Future Past - Xavier Forgot He Controls Minds Days Of Future Past was the second delicate reboot of the X-Men franchise. In it, Charles Xavier sends Wolverine back in time to stop Mystique from assassinating Bolivar Trask and prevent a human-mutant war that eats the future. Xavier has a gentleman's agreement not to use his mental powers against Mystique, so this involves a lot more dialogue and espionage than you'd expect from a man who can control minds. What Would Have Made More Sense: Let's go along with the conceit that Xavier won't enter Mystique's mind and force her to step down. None of us are telepathic mutants and we can never fully understand their ways and customs. But ... couldn't he ignore Mystique and just go into the mind of Trask himself, then incept away all his mutant genocide thoughts? You're already in the comments typing this, but the plot tries to account for it by starting the movie with Xavier's powers being broken. Except they don't stay that way for long. A few minutes after, you know, trying, he's mind-controlling people like crazy. He could have gone right up to Trask, shook his hand, and made him devote his life to, say, breaking the dildo-sitting world record. And to make it harder, he could have scanned the world for the man with the most flexible colon and planted it in his mind as well. It wouldn't have to be exactly that, we guess. The point is he needed something else to do with his life. It's a movie about saving the world from hate, and they give the main character the one specific superpower that can do that directly. He works hard to make it complicated, but Professor X could do any number of clearly harmless, obviously beneficial things. In fact, once Xavier found out he was going to lose his hair, he could have planted an idea in some TV producer's brain to remake Star Trek, only with a bald Kirk so women in the future would find hairless men sexy. It sounds ridiculou- wait ... dear God ... are we, right now, living in the Days Of Future Past universe? #5. Iron Man - The Forgetful Reporter Billionaire weapons dealer Tony Stark is kidnapped by a terrorist organization called the "Ten Rings" but manages to survive by fixing the hole in his chest with 1,200 pounds of laser-blasting armor. Late in the movie, Stark discovers his business partner Obadiah Stane masterminded the kidnapping and was secretly supplying weapons to the terrorists. He is shocked! Horrified! And like all things will, this eventually led to a robot suit battle. What Would Have Made More Sense: Halfway through the movie, a female reporter showed Stark some pictures of Stark Industry weapons being used by the Ten Rings in Afghanistan. When Stark denied his involvement, she retorts by revealing that the weapon's shipment was officially authorized by Stark Industries: So with this huge intel, all the reporter had to do was something she almost certainly had in mind all along: report it. She had a pile of information and a quote from Stark himself, surprised by it and not denying it. Stark Industries would have been immediately under investigation by every agency and news outlet. MSNBC's entire news cycle would be devoted to reading evil Stark documents and interviewing evil Stark employees. However, FOX News' editorial direction wouldn't change as they continued to demand, "Why the media can't just leave evil billionaires alone?" It wouldn't take much effort to uncover the plot. Stane's evil schemes were right there on his computer, and there had to have been dozens of inept, bumbling employees working on his very suspicious personal projects. Plus, with Stark being kidnapped and tortured, that would make Stane the acting CEO and lead suspect before the first inspector arrived at one of their death warehouses. But ... nothing like this ever happens. The journalist shows Stark the pictures and then never bothers to publicize them or even report them to her boss. Is it because Stark slept with her early in the movie, and she is still pining for him? It'd be like a reporter finding out Donald Trump's business partners had ties to ISIS, then just dropping it in hopes Trump would throw her some dick. "Actually, this story is going to seem like small potatoes the moment the world finds out Odin is the one true God." #4. Transformers - The Decepticons Could've Gotten The AllSpark With Their Tiny Spybots The Decepticons are searching for the AllSpark, a mysterious McGuffin that can turn ordinary objects into transformer objects. The AllSpark is on Earth, and the map to it is etched on a pair of glasses owned by Sam Witwicky's great-grandfather. In a way, it's genius -- with a map right on your glasses, you can drive to your space artifacts without having to do any folding or refolding. The Decepticons initially deployed a stealthy spy robot, "Frenzy," inside Air Force One, where its space Internet sensors discovered Witwicky was selling the glasses on eBay. It then hacked eBay to discover Witwicky's location. Knowing by now everyone watching the movie would be bored beyond reason, the very next scene has poor Witwicky and his girlfriend, Mikaela Banes, running from vague, robot-like avalanches of metal shapes. What Would Have Made More Sense: The glasses were on eBay. Couldn't the Decepticons just, you know, buy them? Like, couldn't that space hacker Frenzy just put in a bid? It shouldn't be that hard for a bunch of super advanced space robots to put the cash together, or fool PayPal into thinking they had. And if coming up with the money was too difficult, the Decepticons still knew the address to Witwicky's house. They could have sent the same tiny robot in infiltrate his home security, which was probably easier to circumvent than Air Force One's. It could've stolen both the glasses and the AllSpark over the weekend without the government or the Autobots knowing anything about it. It's only through severe stupidity by every robot and filmmaker involved that this was anything other than, at worst, an online auction or at best, a roboburglary. Instead, the Decepticons deployed swarming piles of pots and pans to attack Witwicky. In military terms, it was like declaring war on Mexico in order to pick up a chalupa combo. The plan was so bad, it alerted both the Autobots and every government on Earth who managed to defeat the Decepticons using only 144 minutes of explosions. Sam Miguel ^^^ (Cont'd ) #3. Primal Fear - Everyone Who Knows Roy Forgets To Talk To The Press If you haven't seen Primal Fear, its description is going to sound absurd. It was about a stuttering wimp of a boy named Aaron, who killed a priest and got away with it because the murder was committed by his split personality, Roy, who was forced to make homemade porno movies with the archbishop. The only thing that kept it from being ridiculous was Ed Norton's acting, which was especially amazing since Aaron was totally sane and made Roy up. So Norton was pretending to be a timid man pretending to be a crazy man in a good movie pretending to have a Mexican soap opera plot. In the end, his lawyer (Richard Gere), who believed him, convinced a court Roy was a real thing and Aaron shouldn't be responsible for the murder. It wasn't the first time a good lawyer looked like a total asshole, but it's one of the most memorable. What Would Have Made More Sense: Roy's case had received national media attention. Everyone clicks on an article with the headline "Archbishop Murdered by Simpleton's Split Personality." But honestly, most of them click on the reaction piece, "3 Reasons Our Culture Says All Murderer Split Personalities Have to Be Men" or the reaction to that, "What Feminists Need to Learn About Murder" or the reaction to that, "Popular Split Personality Blogger's Home Address and Private Photos Leaked by #Roywasright Supporter." The point is, everyone in the world was looking at it and talking about it. Which makes sense until you realize the media, lawyers, reporters, and FBI had all forgotten to look into Aaron's past. And apparently, every single person from Aaron's past forgot about him. It seems like one of his classmates or neighbors might have remembered him being a totally different guy every now and then. The closest thing they did to a background check was this conversation between Roy and his lawyer: You from Kentucky, Aaron?

i don't know

At what Cuban battlefield did Teddy Roosevelt and his Rough Riders attain fame, fortune, and glory during the Spanish American War?

Colored Soldiers~THE SPANISH-AMERICAN WAR, 1898 - Fold3 Colored Soldiers~THE SPANISH-AMERICAN WAR, 1898 Description Add your story… War Begins When the Spanish-controlled island of CUBA was seeking its independence from SPAIN in 1898, the experienced all black military units were ready to serve. It took the explosion of the American battleship, the U. S. S. MAINE, killing 260 Americans (22 Black sailors perished with this crew) on February 15, 1898 in Havana Harbor to create a means for declaring war. American preparation was quick, and on April 22, 1898, the U. S. Navy blockaded SANTIAGO HARBOR and, on April 24, declared war on Spain. Congress also activated TEN REGIMENTS OF ALL BLACK TROOPS: the 6th, 7th, 8th, 9th, 10th, 3rd Alabama, 3rd North Carolina, 23rd, 24th, and 25th. ONLY the 9th, 10th, 24th, and 25th saw combat in this short-lived war. Several key battles included LAS GUAIMAS, EL CANEY, the Battles of SAN JUAN HILL, SANTIAGO, and KETTLE HILL. The SPANISH-AMERICAN WAR established several key points: The Black-American units were able to use more trained black officers as commanders of their regiments. They were able to serve the armed forces on territory outside the United States. Their superior acumen and bravery was recognized by two prominent Americans: Theodore Roosevelt, who later became U. S. President (1901-1909), served along side black soldiers in the SPANISH-AMERICAN WAR as part of the unit, "THE ROUGH RIDERS." On one Cuban mission, the 10th Calvary rescued the Rough Riders. Theodore Roosevelt said, "I don't think that any Rough Rider will ever forget the tie that binds us to the 9th and 10th Calvary." Lieutenant John J. Pershing was able to comment, "White regiments, Black regiments, Regulars, and Rough Riders, representing the young manhood of the North and South, fought shoulder to shoulder. All of the soldiers were mindful only of their common duty as Americans."   On July 3, 1898, The U. S. Navy destroyed the Spanish Naval Fleet. This major battle ended Spanish rule on the Atlantic Seaboard. In the end, the U. S. freed Cuba, and Spain ceded the Philippines, Puerto Rico, and Guam. The U. S. also annexed the republic of Hawaii in 1898. Among those soldiers were: George G. Anderson * William H. Anderson * Daniel Atkins * Edward L. Baker Jr. * Dennis Bell * George Berry * Horace W. Bivins * Lewis Broadus * Horace G. Burke * T. C. Butler * Pierre L. Carmouche * Jordan Chavis * Hilary W. Coston * James Elmer Dellinger * Franklin A. Denison * Lee Fritz * George W. Ford * William H. Franklin * James Gilliard * Captain Wilt Jackson * John A. Logan * John Roy Lynch * Lt. John S. Nelson * Robert Penn * Walter Pinchback * George W. Prioleau * William W. Purnell * Lt. Charles L. Reece * Lt. John W. Shreeves * Lt. Jacob C. Smith * Sgt. William Tompkins * William A. Vrooman * William C. Warmsley * Major William Wesley * Cpt. Horace Wheaton * Col. Charles A. Young Chronology: 1895 February 24 - Second Cuban Insurrection begins. April - General Gomez, General Antonio Maceo, Jose Maceo, Cebreco, Crombet, Guerra, Jose Marti and Borrero land in Cuba May 19 -  Cuban Jose Marti killed in encounter at Dos Rios Oriente Province. June 13 -Spanish General Fidel de Santoclides killed in the battle of Peralejo Oriente Province.  He died, killed by sharpshooter Andres Fernandez of Antonio Maceo's escort, while protecting Arsenio Martinez Campos Spanish Governor of Cuba.  Martinez Campos takes refuge in Bayamo and is soon removed from his position and returned to Spain. September 17 - Battleship MAINE commissioned. October 1895-January 1896.  Antonio Maceo and Maximo Gomez take their forces on the "La Invasion" fighting almost every day from Mangos de Baragua Oriente Province eastern Cuba to Mantua, in Pinar del Rio Province in extreme western Cuba. November 30, 1895 - Battle at Iguara.  It is in  this "La Invasion" encounter that Winston Churchill is given a medal "Red Cross" by the Spanish.  Spanish claim  victory but numerically inferior Cubans continue to advance. 1896 January, 1896 - Antonio Maceo and Maximo Gomez end their "La Invasion." February 16 - General Weyler issues first of reconcentrado orders. March 24 -  Calixto Garcia, escaped from Spain, arrives in Cuba with well armed expedition. August 26 - Philippine Revolution begins. December, 7 - Antonio Maceo killed in encounter at Punta Brava, Havana Province. December 30: Filipino national hero Dr. Jose Rizal is executed by Spanish troops.   March 4 - William McKinley inaugurated as president of the United States. March 13 - Calixto Garcia now using cannon enters the fortified town of Jiguani Oriente Province. June 19 - Stewart Woodford appointed U.S. Minister to Spain August 8 - Spanish Prime Minister Canovas assassinated. August 30 - The Spanish forts at Tunas, north western Oriente Province fall to Calixto Garcia. October 4 - Prime Minister Sagasta takes office in Spain. October 31- Prime Minister Sagasta recalls General Weyler from Cuba. November 28 - The Spanish forts at Guisa, Northern foothills of Sierra Maestra Oriente Province,  fall to Calixto Garcia. 1898 January 1 - Spain institutes limited political autonomy in Cuba. January 12 - Spanish in Cuba "riot" or demonstrate against autonomy-supporting newspaper offices. Consul-General Lee takes this as threat against Americans. January 17 - Consul-General Lee asked for ship to sent to Havana January 21 Esperanza, the Cuban rebel stronghold is invaded. January 24 - Battleship MAINE sent to Havana January 25 - Battleship MAINE arrives in Havana. January 27 - Cuban Brig. Gen. Aranguren ambushed and killed. February 1 - Spanish forces are beaten at Rejondon de Baguanos. This and other previous operations by Garcia, cause the Spanish to abandon the strategically important interior of Oriente Province, and effectively isolating Santiago de Cuba by land from other coastal Spanish garrisons. February 9 - The DeLome letter is printed, critical of McKinley, causing the Spanish diplomat to be recalled. February 15 -Battleship  MAINE explodes, 266 crewmen killed. February 16 - DeLome leaves the US for Spain. February 17 - Naval Board of Inquiry into the loss of the battleship MAINE created ("the Sampson Board") February 18 - Spanish cruiser VIZCAYA arrives in New York in reciprocal visit for the USS Maine, unaware that the Maine had been lost. February 21 - The Naval Court of Inquiry into the loss of the MAINE begins. February 25 - VIZCAYA leaves New York for Havana. February 25 - Theodore Roosevelt, Assistant Secretary of the Navy, cabled Commodore Dewey to be ready if war were to break out, and gave him his objectives March 6 - Spain requests, unofficially, that Consul-General Lee be recalled. March 8 - Congress authorizes $50 million for a war fund. March 14 - Admiral Cervera's squadron steams  for the Cape Verde Islands. March 17 - Senator Redfield Proctor reports on the Cuban situation after his visit to Cuba March 19 - Battleship OREGON, under Capt. Charles Clark leaves San Francisco for Florida, by way of Tierra del Fuego on its famous dash! March 21 - Board of Inquiry Report completed. States that battleship MAINE lost to a mine. March 25 - McKinley receives Board of Inquiry Report. March 26 - McKinley sends note to Spain demanding an end to war in Cuba, as well as a note indicating the findings of the Naval Board of Inquiry. March 28 - Naval Court of Inquiry report presented to Congress. On the same day, the report of the Spanish Board of Inquiry into the loss of the MAINE is received in Washington. This reports states that the loss was the result of an internal accident. March 30 - U.S. minister to Spain, Woodford, conveys request that war in Cuba end and that Cuba be given independence. March 31 - Spain turns down demands of Cuban independence. April 1 - U.S. House of Representatives authorizes $22.6 million for naval vessels. April 6 - Pope asked McKinley to not declare war pending the Pope's negotiations with Spain. April 7 - Ambassadors of England, Germany, France, Italy, Austria and Russia appeal to McKinley for peace. April 9 - Spain orders General Blanco to declare armistice in Cuba. Consul-General Lee and other U.S. citizens leave Cuba. April 11 - McKinley asks Congress for war. April 16 - Army begins mobilization. Teller Amendment passes in U.S. Congress, stating that the U.S. would not annex Cuba. April 19  - U.S. Congress declares Cuba independent. April 22 - Blockade of Cuba commenced by US Navy. First Spanish ship taken. April 23  - McKinley issues call for 125,000 volunteers. Spain declares war. April 25 - U.S. declares war, but makes the declaration retroactive to April 22. Matanzas, Cuba bombarded by the US Navy. April 27 - Commodore Dewey's squadron leaves Mirs Bay, China for the Philippines. April 29 - Calixto Garcia takes Bayamo, abandoned by the Spanish, as headquarters. April 30 - Admiral Cervera's Spanish squadron leaves the Cape Verde Islands for the Caribbean. May 1 - U.S. Navy's Asiatic Squadron under Commodore Dewey defeats the Spanish Pacific Squadron at the Battle of Manila Bay. May 1 -  US Lieutenant Andrew Summers Rowan arrives in Bayamo to coordinate Cuban and US forces. May 11 - Dewey promoted to rear admiral. May 11 - The WINSLOW attacks Cardenas, resulting in the death of Ensign Bagley and five crewmen. Bagley was the only U.S. naval officer to die in the war. Cervera's squadron appears off Martinique. May 11 - The cable is cut at Cienfuegos, Cuba by the crews of the MARBLEHEAD and NASHVILLE May 12 - Admiral Sampson bombards San Juan, Puerto Rico, without warning. May 13 - Commodore Schley's "Flying Squadron" leaves Hampton Roads for the vicinity of Cuba. May 15 - Theodore Roosevelt begins training with Rough Riders. May 17 - Cervera's squadron arrives in Santiago, Cuba. May 25 - McKinley issues a call for 75,000 more volunteers. The first army expedition leaves San Francisco for Manila, P.I. May 28 - Battleship OREGON arrives off Florida after the 14,700 nautical mile dash from the U.S.'s west coast May 29 - US Navy blockades Spanish fleet in Santiago harbor. May 31 - Schley and the blockading squadron skirmish with CRISTOBAL COLON and the forts at Santiago June 3 - Hobson sinks the MERRIMAC at the entrance to Santiago harbor. June 10 - US Marines land at Guantanamo Bay in Cuba. June 12-14 - Maj. Gen. Shafter's Vth Corps embarks at Tampa. June 15 - Spanish squadron leaves Spain for the Philippines. June 21 - Guam "captured" by US forces. June 20 - Calixto Garcia meets with US General William Shafter in Asseradero Sierra Maestra to coordinate US landings. June 20 - Cruiser CHARLESTON captures Island of Guam June 21 - Cuban forces (530 men) under Colonel Gonzalez Clavel are taken by US transport Leone, and protected by the US warships Vixen and the Gloucester  land at Sigua and advance on Daiquri by land. June 22 - At dawn, Gonzalez Clavel's men  advancing by land take the lightly defended Spanish positions on the heights of Daiquiri and control landing zone.  US ships accidentally shell Cuban forces on shore.  U.S forces under General Lawton  begin to land. June 22 - Vth Corps of 16,000 men land at Daiquiri in Cuba throughout the day. June 22-23 -  Cuban scouts take about 20 wounded and report to General Lawton that first Spanish strong positions are at La Guasimas.  Lawton orders US and Cuban forces at his command to hold positions, before fomal attack. June 24  - Battle of Las Guasimas. July 1  - Battles of El Caney and San Juan Hill. July 3 - Spanish fleet attempts to escape from Santiago, all ships destroyed at the naval Battle of Santiago. July 4 - Six Spanish prisoners killed aboard Auxiliary Cruiser HARVARD. The event becomes known as the "Harvard Incident." July 6 - Hobson and his crew exchanged. July 8 - Spanish squadron heading for the Philippines is forced to turn around to protect the Spanish coastline. July 10 - Santiago bombarded by the U.S. Navy. July 17 - Spanish Santiago garrison surrenders. July 25 - US Army invades Puerto Rico. July 26 - Spanish ask for terms of peace through the French ambassador. July 31 - Night attack by the Spanish on the American lines at Manila, P.I. August 9 - Battle of Coamo, Puerto Rico results in U.S. victory; Spain accepts McKinley's terms of peace. August 11 - American Troops entered Mayaguez, Puerto Rico's third largest city. August 12 - Peace protocol is signed (truce). August 13 - U.S. Forces take Manila after a minor skirmish and show of force. August 20 - Great naval review in New York harbor. August 23 - General Merritt appointed governor of Manila. Command of 8th Corps in P.I. given to General Otis. August 25 - General Shafter leaves Cuba.  August 29 - Efforts to raise MARIA TERESA and CRISTOBAL COLON begun by Hobson. September 10 - Spanish Cortes approves peace protocol. September 12 - Admiral Cevera leaves U.S. to return to Spain. September 13 - "Rough Riders" mustered out of service; Spanish senate approves peace protocol. September 14 - U.S. troops begin leaving Puerto Rico; Queen Regent of Spain signs peace protocol. September 20 - First U.S. flag raised in Havana, Cuba. September 24 - Leonard Wood made military governor of Cuba. September 25 - MARIA TERESA raised by Hobson. September 29 - Spanish and American peace commissioners meet for the first time. October 12 - OREGON and IOWA leave New York for Manila, P.I. October 18 - U.S. takes formal possession of Puerto Rico. October 25-18 - Peace Jubilee held in Philadelphia November 5 - MARIA TERESA lost near Cat Island. November 28 - Spain agrees to cede Philippines Islands. November 30 - General Blanco leaves Cuba for Spain. December 10 - Treaty of Paris ends Spanish American War. December 23 - Aguinaldo's cabinet resigns in the Philippines.   February 4 - Philippine American War (formerly called the Philippine Insurrection) begins.   March 4 - McKinley's 2nd inauguration. Roosevelt is vice-president. March 23 - Philippine Revolutionary leader General Aguinaldo captured. September 14 - McKinley dies after being shot on September 6, Theodore Roosevelt becomes President.   Documenting United States Naval Activities Documenting United States Naval Activities During the Spanish-American War By Richard W. Peuser For many people, the conflict known as the Spanish-American War is a little understood episode in U.S. history. ;; It evokes gripping images such as the explosion of the battleship Maine in Havana Harbor on February 15, 1898, or Teddy Roosevelt and the Rough Riders charging up San Juan Hill on July 1, 1898. ;; But few scholars examined the subject at the fiftieth anniversary in 1948, and as the centennial anniversary of the war approaches, there is still a relatively short bibliography. ;; This is unfortunate, since the National Archives and Records Administration (NARA) holds hundreds of thousands of pages of records covering U.S. military activities during this period, many untapped by the research community. ;; It is impossible to cite every series in all navy-related record groups relating to the Spanish-American War, but this article will mention the obvious and some not-so-obvious holdings that document United States naval activities during this period. The United States emerged from the Spanish-American War with a global empire, having acquired the possessions of Cuba, Puerto Rico, Guam, and the Philippines. ;; It was a popular war with both the public and the press. ;; The victories were glorified by newspapers, popular magazines, and veterans' own accounts published after the war.  ;; Songs, poems, and dirges written by the general public romanticized the exploits of ships, soldiers, and sailors. ;; The following poem written by J. L. Miller of Denver, Idaho, entitled Our War Cry Is "The Maine" was sent to the secretary of the navy with the request that it be used as an "official" poem for "Sampson's Fleet": Despite tensions with Spain dating back to 1895, the McKinley administration only reluctantly went to war. ;; The explosion that destroyed the USS Maine did not convince the cautious McKinley to take immediate aggressive action. ;; Instead he studied all available options short of declaring war. ;; But the public clamor for war was very strong, and newspapers such as the New York World and the New York Journal exerted incredible pressure on both Congress and the White House. ;; Eventually, both bowed to this pressure, and McKinley asked Congress for a declaration of war, which was granted on April 25, 1898. ;; Recent scholarship portrays McKinley as a fully competent commander in chief who grasped the strategic objectives and coordinated policy through both the Navy and War Departments. July 14, 2007 The Units After the Indian Wars ended in the 1890s, the regiments continued to serve and participated in the Spanish-American War (including the Battle of San Juan Hill), where five more Medals of Honor were earned. They took part in the 1916 Punitive Expedition into Mexico and in the Philippine-American War. In addition to the African Americans who served in Regular Amy units during the Spanish American War, five African American Volunteer Army units and seven African American National Guard units also served. Volunteer Army: A Brief History of the 3rd Alabama Volunteer Infantry By Patrick McSherry: The 3rd Alabama Volunteer Infantry served out its term of service within the continental U.S., apparently spending most of its time within the borders of its home state. It did not see service overseas. The regiment was mustered into service between June 4 and August 5, 1898 at Mobile, Alabama. At the time of mustering in, the regiment consisted of forty-six officers and 1,185 enlisted men.  The regiment was a "Black Regiment" in that it was made up of African Americans serving under white officers. The regiment served in the Department of the Gulf, and was stationed in in Anniston Alabama in October, 1898. The 3rd Alabama saw no service outside of the U.S. The regiment was equipped with the model 1884 Springfield "Trapdoor" rifle. The regiment was mustered out on March 20, 1899 at Anniston, Alabama. At the time of mustering out, the regiment consisted of forty-six officers and 992 enlisted men. The had seven enlisted men die of disease, and one was killed in accident. Twelve enlisted men were discharged on disability and four were courtmartialed. Lastly, eighty-eight enlisted men deserted.   A Brief History of the 9th U.S. Volunteer Infantry by Christopher Varela and Patrick McSherry: The following is a brief history of the 9th U.S. Volunteer Infantry, an African American Regiment, and an "immune" regiment that saw service in Cuba during the Spanish American War. The 9th U.S. Volunteer Infantry was an African American regiment and was also termed an "immune" regiment, since it was believed that the men were "immune" to the tropical diseases which were decimating the American forces in Cuba by late July, 1898. The unit was mustered into service between June 18 and July 16, 1898 at New Orleans, Louisiana. At the time of muster-in, the unit consisted of 46 officers and 984 men. The regiment trained in New Orleans, Louisiana at Camp H. C. Corbin, located in that city's fairgrounds. By late July, the U.S. forces in Cuba were being ravaged by a series of tropical diseases. Certain U.S. regiments were thought to be made up of men who were immune to these diseases for a variety of reasons. For instance, many thought that African American men were more immune to these diseases than were caucasian men (though there were also regiments of caucasian "immunes" also). With the forces in Cuba rapidly losing men to disease, the government attempted to remove the men who were currently there and replace then with "immune" troops. It was soon found out the theory on immunity was incorrect, and the "immune" regiments suffered from the same diseases as did the other troops. On August 12, 1898, an armistice was declared between the United States and Spain, effectively ending the fighting, though the state of war still existed. On August 17, the 9th U.S. Volunteer Infantry sailed for Cuba aboard the transport BERLIN, arriving there five days later. Originally, the 1st U. S. Volunteer Infantry, an "immune" regiment of white troops departed from Camp Houston in New Orleans, Louisiana to proceed to Santiago, Cuba on August 17, 1898. But last minute directives replaced this regiment with the 9th U. S. Volunteer Infantry. Amid some protests among the men of the regiment, the 1st U. S. Volunteer Infantry unit returned to Galveston, Texas on the same day it had left. The 9th U.S. Volunteer Infantry remained in Cuba until April 26, 1899, arriving back in the U.S. on April 30, 1899. The unit was mustered out of service on May 25, 1899 at Camp Meade, in Middletown, Pennsylvania. At the time of muster out, the unit consisted on 46 officers and 869 men. During its term of service, the unit lost 3 officers to disease, 16 officers resigned or discharged, and one officer dismissed. The unit also lost 73 enlisted men to disease, one to an accident, and twelve discharged on disability. In addition, twelve men deserted.   A Unit History of the 10th Cavalry Regiment By Anthony L. Powell The 10th U.S. Cavalry, an African American regiment served with honor at San Juan Hill in Cuba. This article addresses the difficult position help by Black troops in the U.S. Army during the Spanish American War The Article: America's frontier ceased to exist as a changing geographic limit by 1890. After more than 100 years of expansion on the North American continent, could the American  people be expected to curtail what had become a national pastime with other world powers, particularly those of western Europe most closely identified with America, racing to attain new colonies and retain the older possessions? The fledgling country was now more than 100 years old and bursting to demonstrate its readiness to participate fully in global politics. The American people generally supported the governmental policy of expansion. There was great satisfaction gained in forcing Great Britain to recognize American imposition in the Venezuela-British Guiana border dispute, and in enforcement of the Monroe Doctrine throughout Latin America. The Spanish presence in the Caribbean, especially on the nearby islands of Cuba and Puerto Rico, had been disturbing Americans for many years. It was predictable, then, that an insurrection by the native Cubans would find support in the United States and present an opportunity for an imperialistic adventure. As America entered its expansionist period, the very small U. S. Army  would play a very large role. After all, military might supplied the leverage politicians required in negotiating. The army, for instance, had been instrumental in subduing the native Americans on the frontier and had settled into garrisons for police duty. After 1890 the outposts were gradually withdrawn and installations were moved closer to population centers, brought into closer touch with society and topics of national interest. During the same period, the size of the army was actually increased, but the need for black soldiers to serve in the desolate western wilderness was decreased. And, with the diminishing need for black manpower, suppressed expressions of racism within the service began to reappear. Segregation, disenfranchisement, lynching, and the rhetoric of imperialism that stressed racial superiority were becoming progressively blatant in American Society. While racism had never disappeared in America, acts of intolerance and violence toward blacks had been slowly dissipating. Now, the opportunity to colonize and exploit outside national boundaries rekindled the embers of domestic hate. Black soldiers specifically, were targets of this reversal in race relations. On the frontier, black troops performed well and independently for over thirty years. The post civil war army had created a unique situation where black men were transported to an arena in which they could expect more equitable treatment in exchange for services. And they had made the most of it. By 1890, the mere presence of armed black troops in many areas of the U.S. was sufficient to activate anti-black prejudices. Black soldiers returning from the plains regularly encountered attitudes which they felt should have been overcome and erased by their performance during the Indian wars, they were refused service and ordered out of "white only" restaurants, saloons, and parks, and forced to abide by Jim Crow practices on trains and trolleys. The newly replaced obstacles encountered by black soldiers produced what came to be referred to in the black press as the "rage of the disesteemed." Black soldiers were resentful of every incident being given sensational and distorted publicity which discredited them. The treatment received by black soldiers, coupled with the absence of any opportunity to render service on the battlefield took its toll on their morale. Obviously, the soldiers were in a more favorable position than other blacks to insist on respect and equitable treatment. They not only possessed arms and whatever legal protection was inherent in their uniforms, but there were sufficient numbers to pose a potential threat to their detractors. The threat was not one of insurrection, although that must have been a thought that occurred to blacks and whites on occasion.  For the regiments to continue in effectiveness, the senior officers had to maintain high morale, discipline, and dedication to service, while retaining the ponderous trappings of racial segregation--ambiguous demands to say the least! At times, individuals or small groups would take action in an attempt to breakdown the color barrier, but under the circumstances, black soldiers displayed remarkable restraint. One factor that helped prevent more frequent and more violent reactions on their part was the conviction that their actions had consequences for all black Americans. The sinking of the U.S. Navy battleship MAINE, in Havana harbor, February 15, 1898, and the resulting loss of American lives gave all the cause needed to commence the war Americans, both civilian and military, seemed to want. The suddenness of the event, however, revealed a shortcoming in military preparedness for a nation with expansionist intentions. The army totaled little more than 26,000 men and 2,000 officers. And the mass of experienced combat troops were garrisoned at numerous forts throughout the west. It was no surprise, under the circumstances, that among the first units ordered to Cuba were the four black regiments. They were selected primarily on the basis of recent experience and their record on the Plains, but there was also the judgment of the War Department that blacks were immune to the diseases of the tropics and capable of more activity in high, humid temperatures. This erroneous thinking resulted in a concerted effort to recruit blacks for the formation of more "immune" troops. Whatever the motives for mobilizing  black regulars, the soldiers themselves welcomed the opportunity to demonstrate their "soldierly qualities" and win respect for their race. Black soldiers may have had little hesitation in whole-heartedly joining the Cuban expedition, but a large segment of the black community felt differently. The anti-imperialist element was concerned about the War's impact on black Americans. Many members of this group were sympathetic with the plight of Cuba and especially with black Cubans. "Talk about fighting and freeing poor Cuba and of Spain's brutality; of Cuba's murdered thousands, and starving reconcentradoes. Is America any better than Spain? Has she not subjects in her very midst who are murdered daily without a trial of judge or jury? Has she not subjects in her borders whose children are half-fed and half-clothed, because their father's skin is black." The anti-imperialists envisioned a war that would extend the Jim Crow empire, leaving black Americans as well as the colored population of the Spanish colonies in the same oppressed condition or worse. Only when the American government guaranteed its own minority citizens full constitutional rights, they contended, could it sincerely undertake a crusade to free oppressed people from tyranny. The advocates of the war maintained that the black man's participation in the military effort would win respect from  whites and therefore enhance his status at home. They also hoped that the islands coming under American influence would open economic opportunities for blacks and bring them into  contact with predominately "colored" cultures. "Will Cuba be a Negro republic? Decidedly so, because the greater portion of the insurgents are Negroes and they are politically ambitious. In Cuba the colored man may engage in business and make a great success. Puerto Rico is another field for Negro colonization and they should not fail  grasp this great opportunity." The extreme positions of the anti and pro-war leaders did not, however, characterize the response of blacks in general. Their attitude was clearly ambivalent. A majority seemed to consider participation in the military struggle an obligation of citizenship which they would gladly fulfill if they could do so in a way that would enhance rather than degrade their manhood. They hoped that a display of patriotism would help dissipate racial prejudice against them. Unfortunately, they were never free of misgivings about a war launched in the name of humanity and waged in behalf of "little brown brothers" by a nation enamored with Anglo-Saxon supremacy. The four black regiments were ordered to report to Chickamauga Park, Georgia, and Key West, Florida, in March and April of 1898. Although excited to leave the outposts in the West, there were also regrets. In Salt Lake City, for instance, the people demonstrated their enthusiasm and admiration for the band and men of the 24th Infantry as they lined the streets of the city to bid farewell as the regiment was leaving to join the battle in Cuba. Only two years earlier, the whites of the city had vigorously protested the stationing of black troops at Fort Douglas.  Black soldiers had won the hearts of the people and, for the moment  at least the people had rid themselves of racial prejudice. Following the rendezvous at Chickamauga, the units were moved to the staging area near Tampa, Florida. For more than a month that black troops remained in the area, even their blue uniforms provided little protection from the anti-black prejudice of white soldiers and civilians alike. In the words of a Tampa newspaper, white citizens in the area refused "to make any distinction between the colored troops and the colored civilians" and would tolerate no infractions of racial customs by the colored troops." The wait in Florida became interminable for black units camping near the cities of Tampa and Lakeland for those six weeks in May and June 1898. The 10th Cavalry, the last of the four units to arrive, was forced to find a campsite in Lakeland while the 9th Cavalry and 24th and 25th Infantry, some 3,0000 strong, encamped near Tampa. Racial tension was nothing new for the southeastern United States, but the sudden arrival of blacks unaccustomed to blatant discrimination created an explosive atmosphere. Shortly after their arrival in Lakeland, black troops found themselves in a confrontation with a white antagonist that ended with the man's death and the arrest of two black soldiers. "some of our boys, after striking camp, went into a drug store and asked for some soda water. The druggist refused to sell to them, stating he didn't want their money, to go where they sold blacks drinks. That did not  suit the boys and a few words were passed when  Abe Collins came  into the drug store and said: "You d____niggers better get out  of here and that d_____quick or I will kick you B__S___B____out," and he went into his barbershop which was adjoining the drug store and got his pistols, returned to the drug store. Some of the boys saw him get the guns and when he came out of the shop they never gave him a  chance to use them. There were five shots fired and each shot took effect." In Tampa, conditions were no better, erupting in violence on the eve of embarkation for Cuba and sending nearly 30 black soldiers to the hospital. Black units left Tampa in mid-June "Glad to bid adieu to this section of the country" and hoping "to never have cause to visit Florida again." Sailing from the west coast of Florida, the flotilla of 32 ships carrying nearly 17,000 men landed in near Santiago, on the southeastern tip of Cuba, on June 22 1898. Two days later, the Spanish were engaged at Las Guasimas. The 10th Cavalry, in reserve as the battle began, participated full and was lauded by officers who witnessed their assault on fortified enemy positions. The success of the black troops might well have served them better and their feats heralded had it not been for the participation of the 1st Volunteer Cavalry, better known as Theodore Roosevelt's "Rough Riders."...The morning of June 24 there were three columns started West, first the 1st Volunteer (taking the) bridle path on the very comp of the mountain, where the underbrush was so thick it was impossible to walk only in single file; next, the 1st United States Regular Cavalry, going over a rough and irregular wagon road,  running north or parallel with the route taken by the Rough Riders , the two roads making a junction about four and one-half miles west of here, and the third column, the 10th United States Cavalry, taking a route about a mile or more still further north where there was no road at all. It was intended that the three commands should move as nearly abreast as possible, but the difficulties the 10th Cavalry had to contend with in advancing were not taken into consideration, so they were twenty  to thirty minutes behind on getting into action They all took up the march as above, advancing as blind men would through the dense underbrush." The first column, the Rough Riders, was the first to strike the enemy in ambush 500 yards east of the junction of the two roads mentioned, receiving a volley that would have routed anybody but an American. The first regulars, hearing the music as they called it, hurried forward to join in the dance, and awoke a hornet's nest of Spaniards on the left, north of the party engaging the Rough Riders, and had more music than they  could furnish dancers for. But, to the credit of the uniform and the flag, there if no account of either column giving an inch. They advanced sufficiently to come into line, and holding their ground until the much abused and poorly appreciated sons of Ham burst through the underbrush, delivered several volleys and yelling as only black throats can yell, advanced on a run. Their position being still further to the north and opposite the left flank of the Spaniards, they could  not stand it any longer, but broke and ran, and did not make a decided  stand until they faced us at San Juan...When the battle closed June 24 there were nineteen or twenty killed, but only one of them was colored." A week later, the expeditionary force launched a two-pronged attack intended to secure the outpost at El Caney and the entrenchments on San Juan Hill. The two forces were to gain their objectives and join together for the final assault on Santiago. Troopers from the 25th Infantry acquitted themselves well at El Caney and were among the first to reach the outpost after heavy fighting. Meanwhile, the 24th Infantry and the 9th and 10th Cavalry regiments were establishing a reputation for "themselves as fighting men" at San Juan Hill once more in the shadow of the more heralded, but no more effective, Rough Riders. As the Rough Riders advanced up San Juan Hill they found themselves attacked from all sides and in great danger of being cut to pieces. The black troops of the 9th and 10th Cavalry were some distance away when the word reached them. They went to help on the run. Leaving a trail of dead and wounded left behind, the troopers of the 10th Cavalry advanced under heavy fire, according to a New York reporter, "firing as they marched, their aim was splendid. Their coolness was superb and their courage aroused the admiration of their comrades." It was this action that led a grateful Rough Rider corporal to proclaim, “If  it hadn't been for the black cavalry, the Rough Riders would have been exterminated." Five black soldiers of the 10th Cavalry received the Medal of Honor and 25 other black soldiers were awarded the Certificate of Merit.  For action on July 1, 1898, Private Conny Gray Co. D 25th Infantry, 1st sergeant John Jackson, Troop C, 9th cavalry, Sergeant Elisha Jackson, Troop H, 9th cavalry, corporal George W. Pumphrey, Troop H, 9th cavalry, Private James Bates, Troop H, 9th cavalry, Private Edward Davis, Troop H, 9th cavalry, 1st sergeant Charles W. Jefferson, Troop B, 9th cavalry, Saddler sergeant Jacob C. Smith, Troop C, 10th Cavalry, 1st sergeant Adam Houston, Troop C, 10th Cavalry, corporal John Walker, Troop D, 10th Cavalry, Private Luchious Smith, Troop D, 10th Cavalry, 1st sergeant Peter McCown Troop E, 10th Cavalry, sergeant Benjamin Fasit, Troop E, 10th Cavalry, sergeant Ozrow Gather, Troop E, 10th Cavalry, sergeant John Graham, Troop E, 10th Cavalry, sergeant William Payne, Troop E, 10th Cavalry, corporal Thomas H. Herbert, Troop E, 10th Cavalry, trumpeter Oscar N. Oden, Troop I, 10th Cavalry, sergeant James Satchell, Co. A, 24th Infantry, Private Scott Crosby, Co. A, 24th Infantry, Private Loney Moore, Co. A, 24th Infantry, corporal Richard Williams, Co. B, 24th Infantry, sergeant John T. Williams, Co. G, 24th Infantry, corporal Abram Hagen, Co. G, 24th Infantry,corporal Peter Jackson, Co. G, 24th Infantry, corporal William H. Thornton Co. G, 24th Infantry, Artificer Jesse E. Parker, Co. D,24th Infantry, for action June 24, 1898, Private John A. Humphrey, Troop I, 10th Cavalry. Cuba. In 1922 the War department began systematically reviewing official reports and records and 8 other black soldiers were awarded the Silver Star Citation and Medal's, Presly Holliday, Isaac Bailey, John Buck  and Augustus Walley of the 10th Cavalry, George Driscoll, Robert L. Duvall, Elbert Wolley and Richard Curtis of the 24th Infantry. At San Juan Hill alone, there were 21 who received citations for gallantry 13 received the Certificate of Merit and one Medal of Honor recipient  8 others the Silver Star. But it was not all glory: "We had been on the hill about three hours and my gun was almost red hot. I had fired about 175 rounds of ammunition, and being very thirsty, I gladly accepted the detail, as the hill was ours then and we had been shooting at nothing for about an hour. what a sight was presented as I recrossed the flat in front of San Juan. The dead and wounded soldier! It was indescribable! One would have to see it to know what it was like, and having once seen it, I truly hope I may never see it again....before sunrise the battle was raging furiously. It lasted all day with no intermission, until dark. Everybody being his own cook, and not having anything to cook, I had a very simple diet that day. Almost all the army had the same--breakfast, canteen half full of water: dinner, full canteen of water; supper, the empty canteen. We were relieved after dark by a part of the 71st, and to the rear to get sleep and rest. In about one or two hours, at 8 or 9 o'clock, the Spanish  made an assault on our position, which was repulsed with terrible losses to them. The casualties were light on our side, but we learned since that it cost the Spaniards more than 600 men in attempting to drive us from  San Juan. They found the Yankee wide-awake and not giving an inch. The attack lasted about forty-five minutes, and while it was going on it seemed ten times worst than the battle of the day before. We were finally allowed to return to position in reserve and go to sleep." While most black troops were participating in the actions around Santiago, Troop M of the 10th Cavalry had joined General Gomez of the Cuban Army and took part in several actions. Their activities, once again unheralded, earned the Congressional Medal Honor for four of its enlisted men. "These soldiers of Troop M were isolated from other American forces about three months while they fought with the Cuban insurgent army, they participated in several notable engagements, these cavalrymen would be the only mounted troops during the Cuba campaign, four privates, Dennis Bell, Fitz Lee, William H. Thompkins and George H. Wanton, won particular distinction for staging a daring rescue operation on June 30, 1898 at Tayabucoa. But here again, there was an obstacle to overcome. "The whole company came near getting massacred on account of his (1st lieutenant  Carter P. Johnson), getting drunk. After the Cubans and his command had taken a fort and a block house, he got a barrel of rum, got drunk, pulled down the Spanish flag and ran up his blouse as the American flag. He was given just one-hour  to leave the fort. He ordered his men to fire upon the Cubans, which they refused to do, as they would have been massacred had one shot been fired." The Spanish fleet in the Caribbean was destroyed by American ships on July 3, 1898, forcing surrender of the islands on July 16. By this time, over 4,000 men were hospitalized with dysentery, yellow fever, typhoid, and Malaria. Black soldiers once more made testament to their commitment to the military effort as the 24th Infantry went to the aid of the hospital in Siboney after the assignment had been turned down by eight white units. The tropical conditions, lack of proper nutrition and medical facilities, and the reluctance to immediately return the troops home once the war was over cost the lives of some 5,000 men fewer than 400 lost their lives in combat. "We have thirty-eight men present in the troop, of which nineteen are down with fever. Now we are almost naked, no medicine, not much to eat, hot water to, drink, sleeping on the bare ground, no papers of any kind." Briefly in the late summer of 1898, the black regiments enjoyed the status of heroes, receiving recognition from whites as well as blacks. The war correspondent Stephen Bonsal wrote."The services of no four white regiments can be compared with those rendered by the four colored regiments. They were at the front at Las Guasimas, at El Caney and at San Juan, and what was the severest test of all, that came later, in the yellow fever hospitals." Chaplain Allen Allensworth and the 24th Infantry regiment were at Fort Douglas, Utah. At the very outset Allensworth addressed the issue of Black manhood. After they received orders to proceed to Florida, the regiment was marched from their barracks into a formation near the regimental commander's headquarters to hear an address by Chaplain Allensworth. He spoke to the troops, one company at time, saying: "Soldiers and comrades, Fate has turned the war dogs loose and you have been called to the front to avenge an insult to our country's flag. Before leaving I will say to you, ‘Quit yourselves like men and fight.’ Keep in mind that the eyes of the world will be upon you and expect great things of you. You have the opportunity to answer favorably the question, ‘Will the Negro fight?’ Should you be ordered to charge the enemy, as your brothers then said as they charged, ‘Remember Fort Pillow,’ so when you are ordered to charge, say to your comrades, ‘Quit yourselves like men and fight,’ and Remember the Maine!" Chaplain T. G. Steward expressed pride in the Black regiments mobilized for service in Cuba and believed that their performance would improve the condition of "the Black man of the south." In his many letters to the Cleveland Gazette, between May 1898 and July 1901, Steward frequently addressed the racial issue, commenting on the racial customs he witnessed in the South, he remarked: "A glorious dilemma that will be for the Cuban Negro, to usher him into the condition of the American Negro." Whenever Steward encountered discrimination, he did not back away. With the movement of Black troops South during the War with Spain Chaplain Prioleau, started addressing the racial issue and over the next few years became quite vocal about it. In a letter to the Cleveland Gazette, Prioleau talked about the reception of Black regulars in the South he said: "The prejudice against the Negro soldier and the Negro was great, but it was of heavenly origin to what it is in this part of Florida, and I suppose that what is true here is true in other parts of the state. Here, the Negro is not allowed to purchase over the same counter in some stores that the white man purchases over. The southerners have made their laws and the Negroes know and obey them. They  never stop to ask a white man a question. He (Negro) never thinks of disobeying. You talk about freedom, liberty etc. Why sir, the Negro of this country is freeman and yet a slave. Talk about fighting and freeing poor Cuba and Spain's brutality; of Cuba’s murdered thousands, and starving reconcentradoes. Is America any better than Spain? Has she not subjects in her midst who are murdered daily without a trial of judge or jury? Has she not subjects in her own borders whose children are half-fed and half-clothed, because their father's skin is Black. "Yet the Negro is loyal to his country's flag. O! he is a noble creature, loyal and true, forgetting that he is ostracized, his race considered as dumb as driven cattle, yet, as loyal and true men, he answers the call to arms and with blinding tears in eyes and sobs he goes forth: he sings "My Country 'Tis of Thee, Sweet Land of Liberty," and though the word "liberty" chokes him, he swallows it and finished the stanza "of Thee I sing." Chaplain Prioleau, was on recruiting duty for the 9th Cavalry, while the regiment was away fighting in Cuba. In another letter to the Gazette, he calls attention to the cruelties and ironies spawned by racial prejudice, also he reveals a similar attitude that chaplain Plummer, displayed not many years before: "Tuskegee, Alabama, normal and industrial institute furnishes the town with electricity. Think of it! The slaves of Alabama furnishing material and intellectual light for their former masters. Yet when an officer of the United States Army, a Negro chaplain, goes in their midst to enlist men for the service of the government, to protect the honor of the flag of his country, and this chaplain goes on Sunday to M.E. Church (White) to worship God, he is given three propositions to consider, take the extreme back seat, go up in the gallery or go out. But as we were not a back seat or gallery Christian, we preferred going out.  We did not fail to inform them on the next day that the act was heinous, uncivilized, unchristian, un-American. We were informed that niggers have been lynched in Alabama for saying less than that. We replied that only cowards and assassins would overpower a man at midnight and take him from his bed and lynch him, but the night you dirty cowards come to my quarters for that purpose there will be a hot time in Tuskegee that hour; that we were only three who would die but not alone. We stayed there ten days, enlisted 34 men." Later that month Prioleau, wrote still another letter to the Gazette, in this letter he points out the difference in the reception given white soldiers and those of his own regiment. Prioleau was keenly aware that the war with Spain had failed to dissipate Negro phobia as he called it, as some Blacks had predicted it would. In his view, "hatred of the Negro" is no longer confined to the South, it had become a national rather than a sectional phenomenon: "While the cheers and the "God bless you" were still ringing in our ears, and before the warm handshakes had become cold, we arrived in Kansas City, Mo., the gateway to America's hell, and were unkindly and sneeringly received. Yet these Black boys, heroes of our country, were not allowed to stand at the counters of restaurants and eat a sandwich and drink a cup of coffee, while the white soldiers were welcomed and invited to sit down at the tables and eat free of cost. You call this American ‘prejudice.’ I call it American ‘hatred’ conceived only in hellish minds. Why, sir this thing is getting worse every day. An expression of Senator Tillman's June speech is: ‘Down with the niggers,’ but if we must tolerate them, give us those of mixed blood.  And yet if a Negro man marries, or even looks at a white woman of South Carolina, he is swung to the limb of a tree and his body riddled with bullets. It seems as if there is no redress in earth or Heaven. It seems as if God has forgotten us. Let us pray for faith and endurance to ‘Stand still and see the Salvation of God.’" While Chaplain Steward was stationed in the Philippine Islands a white medic refused to salute him. How did he react? Steward said, "I have found it necessary to round up a few white soldiers for disrespect since I have been here. In every case I have succeeded in bringing them to terms in the shortest sort of order. I was coming away from the a hospital one Sunday and the corps man failed to salute me. I turned and followed him to the office and said to the steward: ‘Who has charge here?’ He arose, and saluting promptly, replied, ‘Major Keefer, sir.’ ‘I want to see that young man,’ said I. ‘Call him.’ He did so, and the man came up and saluted as humbly as need be. I gave him a word of instruction, and that cured everybody around the hospital.” ”The other day three volunteers riding in a hack (Forty-third volunteers) passed me as I was riding the other way and indulged in some vile cursing at my expense. They did not know me as well as they thought they did. I ordered my driver to turn and follow them, and soon overtaking them, I ordered their driver sternly to halt, a command which he obeyed instantly. I then got out of my carriage and read them a lecture, they denying they had said anything disrespectful and begging me to let them pass on. I subsequently reported the affair to their colonel, not desiring any action to taken as I had not sufficient proof; but it helped them. So, I have found it necessary to be a little exacting and have tightened up the reins around me a little."  A year later on his return to the United States on an Army transport with his son, also an officer, the dining room steward attempted to relegate them to a side table. Chaplain Steward refused to sit there and brought the matter to the attention of his regimental commander; the colonel settled the matter by inviting him to dine at his table and seating his son with the junior officers. Prioleau made much of the racial affinity between Black Americans and the "dark skinned people" of the Philippines, but by the summer of 1901 his attitude began to change, as the condition of Blacks at home continued to worsen. In a letter to The Colored American Magazine of Washington D.C., he expressed some of his fears that the United States was less concerned with the welfare of its own Black citizens than with that of the people of the colonies. Perhaps more graphically than anyone else Prioleau, expressed the attitude of most Black Americans, when he suggested that the generosity of the U.S. might enable the Filipino to "Outstrip the Negro." His fear was that the Brown man of the Pacific, would become “America”s China baby,” while the Black citizen continued “to be the ‘rag’ baby of the republic. Chaplain Anderson, was the only Black chaplain to serve in Cuba during the war. Lieutenant Colonel T. A. Baldwin, of the 10th Cavalry wrote this about Anderson, in 1899, "After being relieved by Major Kelley, Chaplain Anderson on his own request was ordered to join his regiment in Cuba and on the 24th day of July reported for duty. He at once applied himself to assisting in the relief of the many fever patients then in the regiment by visiting and nursing the sick and cheering them by his Christian example and fortitude even after he was sick and suffering himself and effected much good." Chaplain Prioleau  was on his way to Cuba with the 9th Cavalry but contracted malaria in Tampa just before his departure and remained in the states. When he recovered sufficiently, he was placed on recruiting duty for his regiment in Tuskegee, Alabama, and in his home town of Charleston, South Carolina. Though recruiting was not a customary duty for a chaplain, his regiment, as well as other regiments, needed men to meet its authorized wartime strength; it was therefore an important duty. Chaplains Steward and Allensworth were on regimental recruiting duty for the duration of the Cuban campaign, both men served in their home town areas, Steward in Dayton, Ohio, and Allensworth in Louisville, Kentucky. In that capacity Allensworth was especially successful. While awaiting his orders at Fort Douglas, Utah, after his unit, the 24th Infantry, had departed, he recruited in the Salt Lake City area for a regiment composed of white troops. After he received his orders, he recruited 465  men, which put the strength of the 24th at 1,272. Within six months after the Spanish-American War ended, Three of the Black regiments and a part of the fourth were sent to the Philippine islands for duty. Chaplains Allensworth, Steward and Piroleau went with their regiments to the islands. Chaplain Anderson, served with his regiment in Cuba as part of the occupation forces from (1899-1902), and with the regiment in the Philippines Islands (1907- 09). Shortly after the end of the Spanish-American War a decline began in the status of Black serviceman. White sentiment ran against Black soldiers; too much apparently had been made of their success, causing them to forget their subservient "place. "Even Theodore Roosevelt , who had been a supporter of Black soldiers, reversing his earlier praise, stated that Black soldiers were peculiarly dependent upon their white officers and Black noncommissioned officers generally lacked the ability to command and handle the men like the best classes of whites. Roosevelt apparently was bowing to the pressures of public opinion. Actually, the status of Black regulars had begun to slowly erode as early as 1890 when the army expanded but did not expand the opportunities for Blacks. Moreover, the emphasis had shifted to education and technical skills, and it was widely held that Blacks as a rule lacked the innate intelligence to assume these new responsibilities. At the close of the century, however, Black servicemen had become impatient with the long-standing policy of limited opportunities, discrimination, and paternalistic white officers. Chaplain Steward's comments revealed the deepening dissatisfaction of Black servicemen. "The colored American soldier, by his own prowess, has won an acknowledged place by the side of the best trained fighters with arms," he said. "In the fullness of his manhood he has no rejoicing in patronizing paean, the colored troops fought nobly, nor does he glow at all when told of his 'faithfulness' and devotion to his white officers, qualities accentuated to the point where they might well fit an affectionate dog." The military refused to meet the growing expectations of its Black soldiers. Throughout the period from the end of the Spanish-American War to the beginning of World War 1, the notion of Black men as officers was largely rejected by the military who reflected the popular stereotypes of Black inferiority. To the call for increasing the number of Black commissioned officers, a writer to the Army and Navy Journal argued that experience up to that time had not justified the request. Education could not remove innate inferiority. The ability to lead comes from generations of cultivation, and the American Negroes were descendants of weak African tribes easily overcome by "vigorous neighbors." He concluded by reaffirming the long-held view that Blacks may make excellent soldiers, "but the qualities that make a good soldier and those required for an officer are not necessarily the same." On alleged racial inferiority, Chaplain Steward offered a rebuttal using Black soldiers as his evidence. Even though he pointed out that American soldiers were classed as colored and white, the expectations, feeding, clothing, and general treatment were the same. The military, he contended, was the best place to evaluate the subject. Comparing regiment by regiment for considerable periods of time there is no evidence of physical or moral inferiority on the part of the Negro. And it is fact that the Black regiments have fewer court martial cases, fewer desertions and less alcoholism was clear, save individual differences, but "regiment with regiment, company with company" there was equality. Chaplain Steward made this comment about race and the color question in 1901: "Nothing is clearer than the fact that the great color question is dividing the world. Just as it is wicked to be Black in America. I fear the day will dawn when it will be wicked to be white. Three fourths of mankind are surely awakening. The World's Negro Congress is but a straw. The coming people are those of Asia and Africa. Japan has already shown what can be done; and the Filippinos, Chinese, and people of India are sure to emerge, sooner or later." Convinced that they had demonstrated their value as combat troops and imbued with a new sense of self-confidence, black soldiers expected to be rewarded commensurate with their performance, nothing less than officers’ commissions. The failure of the War Department to extend such recognition in the regular army was vigorously protested by black veterans of the Cuban campaign and especially by black civilians. Their contention was that even if the law establishing the black regiments required white officers, it was the duty of Congress and the War Department to have the law changed. The promotions for some non-commissioned officers and the granting of commissions in the volunteer service for those black regulars who displayed conspicuous gallantry in Cuba did nothing to dispel the disappointment and disillusionment. "Will this government recognize and reward the brave non-commissioned officers of the 10th cavalry for the gallantry who, when the white commissioned officers were either killed or wounded and could go no further, took command. When the  leadership fell upon them, did they cry out in despair, ‘I want a white man to lead me?’ No! The troops had confidence in their Negro leaders; they did not become demoralized but marched on to a glorious victory under the leadership of Negroes whose names should go down in history. These men showed that they could be depended upon at a critical moment and why not now? While the states were mobilizing black volunteers in the summer of 1898, Congress authorized the War Department to organize ten additional volunteer regiments under its immediate direction. These additional black units were the 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th Volunteer Infantry regiments, and were recruited from the black population in the South and the Ohio Valley. In response to the demand for black officers, the War Department commissioned blacks as lieutenants in the line companies of these so called "immune" regiments. The term of service for Volunteers, including the black regiments, was of short duration. In most instances, it was about one year. Benjamin O. Davis Sr., began his long and distinguished military career as an officer of the 8th United States Volunteer Infantry, in July, 1898. For some of those black officers like Davis, who had been civilians learning and teaching occurred simultaneously. In Davis’ Company G, Captain Palmer (white) had no military training, and Lieutenants Davis and Minkis had merely been high-school cadets. Although Davis was given the job of training the company in close order drill, he relied on the help of 1st Sgt Calvin Tibbs, a veteran of five years in Troop L, Ninth Cavalry. Another black soldier who helped Davis in those early months was 2nd Lieutenant Andrew J. Smith, who prior to his commissioning had served for twenty-eight years as a non-commissioned officer with the Twenty-Fifth Infantry. Davis learned much about the customs of the service and the application of military principles from Smith. One Soldier of the 6th Virginia Volunteers had this to say about the attitude of  the white commander of his regiment. "When the second call was made in 1898, there was talk of white officers for the 6th, the objections were so strong, the War Department allowed the Negro Militia to have their own officers. 1st Lieutenant R.C. Croxton, of the regular army was commissioned Lt. Colonel, commanding. At Camp Corbin, Va., when the 6th, was organized, all seemed to be working smoothly. At Knoxville, Tenn., it was apparent that Lt. Col. Croxton had little use for his Negro Officers. Many times I heard him reprimand ‘Captains’ or ‘Lieutenants’ in front of the men. After being in Knoxville for a few days, we were told that the Major of the 2nd Battalion, 5 Captains and 3 or 4 Lieutenants had been ordered to take examinations. They promptly resigned exactly what the Lt. Col. wanted.” The Officers said they passed the State Board at Richmond. White officers were brought in the replace those blacks who resigned. Allen went on to state" From my own experience and  what I have read, white officers are proud to command Negro soldiers. What hurts a white officer, is seeing a Negro wearing ‘shoulder straps’ Thanks to heaven, all changed since World War 1." During 1898-1899, the 9th Volunteer Infantry, one of the "immune" regiments along with two black state units the 8th Illinois and the 23rd Kansas, performed garrison duty in Cuba. "When we are in Santiago we are reminded so much of home. There is a hotel there called the American, run by an American who is from St. Louis, Mo. The first time I was there I went to that hotel with Captain Hawkins of Atchison, who is very light in color. They thought he was white so said nothing to him, but the proprietor was going to stop me. He said his boarders and white customers objected to eating with colored men and that he could not afford to ruin his business by accommodating me.  I told him I was an American officer and had always associated with gentlemen all my life and did not  propose to disgrace myself or my shoulder straps eating at a side table or in a side room to please a few second class white officers who never had money enough to take a  meal in a first class hotel until they became officers in the volunteer army of the United States during the present war; I ask no special privileges, but would have what was due me as an army officer or know the reason why; that he need not think that we colored soldiers who spilled so much of our precious blood on the brow of San Juan Hill that  it might be possible for him and other Americans to safely do business, and are standing now with bayonets or guns as sentinels to protect them in that business, were to allow any discrimination on account of our color; and all I wanted to know was whether or not he was going to feed me.  The dining room was full of officers and others, and you could have heard a pin fall while I was talking, and while the proprietor was finding something to say an officer whom I later found out to be General Ewers of military district no. 1, got up from the table, walked over to me and grasped my hand and said, "Come, Captain, take my seat; and you, Mr Hotel Proprietor, get him some food and get it quick;  and I don't want to hear any more of this d____n foolishness with these officers of mine.!  I was a little king there in about a minute..." Black volunteers who remained in the United States were shuffled from camp to camp and subjected to discriminatory treatment by whites, especially civilians. Disillusioned with military service as a means of improving the condition of their race, most black volunteers welcomed the mustering out of their units early in 1899. Most of the regular army non-commissioned officers who had accepted commissions in the volunteers returned to their regular units with their previous rank. The enlisted men who remained in the regular army units fared no better. This was indicative of the comments made at the time: "While the cheers and the ‘God bless you’ were still ringing in our ears, and before the warm handshakes had become cold, we arrived in Kansas City, Mo., the gateway to America's hell, and were unkindly and sneeringly received...these black boys, heroes of our country, were not allowed to stand at the counters of restaurants and eat a sandwich and drink a cup of coffee, while the white soldiers were welcomed and invited to sit down at the tables and eat free of cost." In some instances, the bigots were not content to enforce Jim Crow customs. "Private John R. Brooks, Troop clerk of H Troop and Corporal Daniel Garrett. were returning to their camp about 9 or 9:30 p.m. after visiting friends. They were waylaid and shot down, Private Brooks being killed instantly. Corporal Garrett died on the 13th inst ‘Horse’ Douglas, colored, was captured as he was running past a  policeman with a pistol in his hand  Some low scoundrel put out a reward for every black 10th Cavalryman that was killed. A black man tried to commit the crime... a soldier placed a pin knife at the throat of the would be murderer and made him give  his pistol up, which he turned over to his Captain. This man called the next day for his pistol, but the Captain refused to give it up, but otherwise he took  no action in  the matter. This is the kind of protection men in the 10th Cavalry receive. This man even made a statement that there was a reward on the head of every 10th Cavalry man. Are we to stand by and see our comrades foully murdered? James Nealy a Private of the 24th Infantry was Shot and killed in Hampton, GA, because he asked for a glass of soda water: This business is getting serious, and the end is not far off. No use to look to the government. It has been slumbering for some time. Colored men must protect themselves, if they hang for it. Lynch law must go!"  In some instance the men took the law into there own hands Sergeant John Kipper of Co A 25th Infantry was sentenced to life in prison for leading a mob of Negro soldiers against an El Paso, TX, police station, 17 Feb 1900, and for murder of policeman Newton Stewart. July 14, 2007 A Brief History of the 3rd Alabama Volunteer Infantry The 3rd Alabama Volunteer Infantry served out its term of service within the continental U.S., apparently spending most of its time within the borders of its home state. It did not see service overseas. The History: The regiment was mustered into service between June 4 and August 5, 1898 at Mobile, Alabama. At the time of mustering in, the regiment consisted of forty-six officers and 1,185 enlisted men.  The regiment was a "Black Regiment" in that it was made up of African Americans serving under white officers. The regiment served in the Department of the Gulf, and was stationed in in Anniston Alabama in October, 1898. The 3rd Alabama saw no service outside of the U.S. The regiment was equipped with the model 1884 Springfield "Trapdoor" rifle. The regiment was mustered out on March 20, 1899 at Anniston, Alabama. At the time of mustering out, the regiment consisted of forty-six officers and 992 enlisted men. The had seven enlisted men die of disease, and one was killed in accident. Twelve enlisted men were discharged on disability and four were courtmartialed. Lastly, eighty-eight enlisted men deserted.   July 14, 2007 A Brief History of the 3rd North Carolina Volunteer Infantry The 3rd North Carolina Volunteer Infantry served it term of service within the continental U.S. The regiment did not see service abroad. The regiment was a "Black" regiment in that it was a regiment of African Americans lead by white officers. The History: War having been declared against the Kingdom of Spain and a call for volunteers made by President McKinley, the African Americans of North Carolina were quick to respond and offer their services to their country. James H. Young, of Raleigh, North Carolina was commissioned Major of the “Russell Black Battalion,” composed of three companies, A, B and C. The men were all new recruits with the exception of Company A, of Charlotte, North Carolina who were members of the state National Guard. The “Russell Black Battalion” was mustered into the service of the United States on May 12, 1898 and went into camp at Fort Macon, North Carolina. May 30, 1898 where they drilled daily. All the while Major Young was untiring in his efforts to form a regiment. He succeeded through his Excellency Governor Russell. Having issued a call for the formation of a Regiment, there would be eleven companies raised. The counties where the Companies A-L originated from are listed as follows: Company A - Mecklenburg July 14, 2007 The 6th Virginia Volunteer Infantry at Camp Poland The following accounts of the 6th Virginia Volunteer Infantry in Camp Poland, Tennessee during the Spanish American War appeared in the Kmoxville Journal and Tribune. The Articles: October 2, 1898: Nothing remained yesterday of the old camp of this regiment at Lonsdale but the Y.M.C.A. tent and a shed which had been used for storing commissary supplies. All the remainder of the camp equipage had been transferred to the new camp at Brookside, on the slope just below division headquarters. At the old camp there was no place where the regiment could drill to advantage. Colonel Croxton is especially pleased with the new location because of the excellent drill ground, and he expects that his regiment will from this on make rapid progress in drill. As an evidence of the fact that the men of this regiment are peaceful and law abiding it is only necessary to state the fact that as yet not a single Sixth Virginian has been arrested by the provost guards in the city. This is a good record. October 2, 1898: Now that it has been ordered from Washington that the regimental hospital shall be re-established , in connection with the division hospital, and that each regiment shall have the services of at least two surgeons, one of them being of the rank of major, much speculation is being indulged in as to where the extra surgeons shall come from. As is well known none of the regiments in Camp Poland, with the exception of the colored regiments, have the required number of surgeons. Seven surgeons of this division were sent to Cuba and Porto Rico, while the troops were at Chickamauga, and a number have been made brigade surgeons, or detailed to the division hospital. The Second Ohio, for instance, has at present none of its surgeons with the regiment, Captain McDonald, of the Fourth Tennessee, having been detailed as its regimental surgeon, while at the same time acting as brigade surgeon. The Thirty-First Michigan is in much the same fix as the Second Ohio, having none of its regular surgeons with it, a contract surgeon, Dr. Haze, acting in the capacity of regimental surgeon. It is very probable that when surgeons are assigned to the regiments so that the recent order may be out in force, or in other words, so that each regiment shall have at least two surgeons, a number of contract surgeons will be among the numbers. It will be remembered, that when Secretary Alger was here he stated that no more surgeons could be commissioned without the consent of congress, but that if more surgeons were needed he would see to it that a sufficient number of contract surgeons would be furnished. From this it is believed that in a short time Camp Poland will have a number of contract surgeons assisting in caring for the sick. October 2, 1898: July 14, 2007 The First African American Officers This account, from Leslie's Weekly Illustrated magazine, provides information on Captain William J. Williams, First Lieutenant William H. Jackson, and Second Lieutenant George W. Braxton. According to the article, these men were the first African American officers to serve in a state volunteer regiment during the Spanish American War. In addition, their company, 6th Massachusetts Volunteer Infantry, Company L, was the first, and possibly only, African American company to be attached to a white regiment. The account is quoted from the magazine as it appeared in the magazine. The 6th Massachusetts served in Puerto Rico during the war The Account: July 14, 2007 Danger in Fire Room 2! The following account demonstrates some of the terrible dangers that existed below decks in the Spanish American war vessels, powered by coal and steam. Here the danger of explosion, the result of water hitting the extremely hot furnaces, was very real. It took some rapidly-thinking men to go beyond the usual call of duty and avert catastrophe. The Account: An act of singular bravery was performed on A the 20th of July on board the IOWA by two members of her engineers' force. Shortly before 7 o'clock in the morning it happened that a manhole gasket blew out in one of the boilers of fire-room No. 2. The fireroom immediately filled with live steam and the floor was covered with boiling water, flying from the boiler under a pressure of 120 pounds. Coppersmith P. B. Keefer and Second-class Fireman Robert Penn, who were stationed in adjoining compartments, rushed instantly to the rescue.  Penn entered fire-room No. 2 just in time to save an injured coal-passer from falling into the boiling water which covered the floor. He carried the man, who bad both feet scalded and a wound on his forehead, to a safe place and then ran back.  Keefer, who heard the noise, had in the meantime dashed below and found his way through the blinding steam to the two inboard furnaces and hauled [removed] the fires.  In the meantime Penn had the extra feed pump turned on in the after fire-hold and built a bridge by throwing a plank across some ash buckets.  Fireman Smith, who wished to assist Keefer, bad both legs terribly scalded by the boiling water on the floor.  Penn, while Passed Assistant Engineer Stockney held the plank in place, then hauled the two remaining fires, and thus the imminent danger of an explosion was averted by his and Keeler's fearlessness and quickness.  Both men were awarded the Medal of Honor. Excerpted  from: The 3rd North Carolina Volunteer Infantry at Camp Poland Contributed By: Jeff Berry: The following articles provide information on the camp life experienced by the 3rd North Carolina Volunteer Infantry at Camp Poland, Tennessee. The article appeared in the Knoxville Journal and Tribune.. The History: October 2, 1898: This regiment is now the only one left at Lonsdale, and in all probability it will soon be moved to another location also. A number of camping sites have been inspected, but the one which in all probability will be selected is located in the Middlebrook pike at the point where the Middlebrook electric line crosses the Knoxville Belt Line railroad. This is a most excellent location, all points considered. The water to be used by the regiment after its removal will be the same as that to be used by the Second Ohio, which will be Tennessee River water, from the mains of the Knoxville Water company. This will be piped from the marble mills, near by. October 2, 1898: Now that it has been ordered from Washington that the regimental hospital shall be re-established , in connection with the division hospital, and that each regiment shall have the services of at least two surgeons, one of them being of the rank of major, much speculation is being indulged in as to where the extra surgeons shall come from. As is well known none of the regiments in Camp Poland, with the exception of the colored regiments, have the required number of surgeons. Seven surgeons of this division were sent to Cuba and Porto Rico, while the troops were at Chickamauga, and a number have been made brigade surgeons, or detailed to the division hospital. The Second Ohio, for instance, has at present none of its surgeons with the regiment, Captain McDonald, of the Fourth Tennessee, having been detailed as its regimental surgeon, while at the same time acting as brigade surgeon. The Thirty-First Michigan is in much the same fix as the Second Ohio, having none of its regular surgeons with it, a contract surgeon, Dr. Haze, acting in the capacity of regimental surgeon. It is very probable that when surgeons are assigned to the regiments so that the recent order may be out in force, or in other words, so that each regiment shall have at least two surgeons, a number of contract surgeons will be among the numbers. It will be remembered, that when Secretary Alger was here he stated that no more surgeons could be commissioned without the consent of congress, but that if more surgeons were needed he would see to it that a sufficient number of contract surgeons would be furnished. From this it is believed that in a short time Camp Poland will have a number of contract surgeons assisting in caring for the sick. October 3, 1898: It is now almost certain that the camp of this regiment will be removed to the hillside on the Middlebrook pike at the point where the street car track crosses the railroad and it is expected that as soon as the water pipes are laid from the mains of the Knoxville Water company. The camp will be moved. Yesterday many of the officers and men enjoyed the hospitality of colored residents of the city, who invited them out to dinner. The regiment yesterday furnished one detail of four hundred men to assist in laying the water pipes to the new camping grounds of the Third brigade on the Middlebrook pike. October 3, 1898: A force of six hundred soldiers was busy at work yesterday laying the water pipes to the camp. Four hundred of these were from the Third North Carolina regiment and two hundred from the Second Ohio. It is expected that the water will be running at the company kitchens by tomorrow, at the latest. The city water will be used exclusively. October 5, 1898: The following letter is reported to have been sent to Secretary of War Alger by members of this regiment. The names of those who signed the letter were not given to The Journal and Tribune reporter with the copy of the letter. Third North Carolina Regiment July 14, 2007 Pvt. William C. Kniffen~Diary The following is a  diary kept by Private William "Will" Challen Kniffen of the 9th Illinois Volunteer Infantry, Co. K. The diary provides a candid first-hand account of life in the regiment, addressing issues such a racial problems, army food, camp life, etc. The diary has been transcribed as originally written. Kniffen, of Belle Rive, Illinois, was born on February 7, 1879 in Jefferson Co. His parents had both died when he was young and Will was raised by his uncle who owned the "Kniffen Hotel and Livery" in Belle Rive. Will Kniffen was mustered into Co. K on June 28, 1898, and served until being mustered out on June 28, 1899. When he mustered in, he listed himself as being 21 years and 5 months old, altering his age by two years for an unknown reason. He was five feet, seven inches tall, with brown hair and brown eyes. He listed his occupation as "laborer." About 1900 another resident of Belle Rive, James Henry Womelduff, decided to move his family to Kansas City, Missouri, following some of his family members who had moved to that area earlier and reported good things back to him. Will, who was the sweetheart of one of James Henry Womelduff's daughters, followed in 1901. In Kansas City he married Cora Lillian Womelduff on March 31 of that same year. James Henry Womelsduff was a carpenter and Will learned the carpentry trade from him. Will and Cora's first home was reportedly built by James and Will. In Kansas City Will and Cora had two children, Louise (1903) and Helen (1906), before his untimely death on January 31, 1909. His final illness came on rapidly, and his death was not expected, devastating his family. He was believed to be an influenza victim. He was buried on February 2, 1909 at Mount Washington Cemetery, Independence, Jackson, Missouri. The Diary: "Co K 9th Regiment Illinois Volunteers assembled at Mt Vernon, Ills, Jefferson County on the 27th June 1898 and left that place on the 29 of same month for Springfield, Ills to be mustered in the United States service for two years or during the war with Spain to serve in Cuba.  We layed around there until the 10th of July and was examined and mustered into the service on that day which was Friday.  Then we commenced to drill in earnest and I guess we was the most awkward set of fellows ever brought together.  In about one week after we was mustered in the service we received our new uniforms and then we felt as big as kings.  We was at Springfield about 40 days.  And most every Sunday there was ___________ from all parts of the state and the boy folks would come to see us which would make most of us home sick for a few days afterwards. On the 2nd of July about 3 o’clock in the afternoon the 9th was on dress parade and the 8th boys started a row.  And there was a large crowd out and there was some trouble in getting it stopped.  The 8th and 9th never could get along together.  The reason was the 8th was all negroes.  Us fellows and them was always in a scrap and laying each other out.  One of the coons got his light put out up town one night by one of the 9th boys.  So then we had to look out for the coons.  We had to drill two hours each day and it was awful hot too. On the 15th of July we was all vaccinated and in a few days there was a lot of sore arms in the Regiment.  We had to take long practice marches and carry a big heavy load.  We had to take these marches every other day.  And we generally had to march from 10 to 15 miles.  We thought it tough too.  So this was the way our time at Springfield, Ills was spent.  We never got payed at Camp _______ at all.  So on the 6th of August we broke camp and that night about midnight we were aboard a Wabash train on our way to Jacksonville, Florida to join the 7th Army Corps under Gen. Lee.  We was 4 days on the way to Camp Cuba Libre.  Arrived there on the 10th of August 98 it was awful hot.  And the sand was ____  deep.  When we left the train we had to march about 5 miles to where our camp was located.  And carried pretty heavy loads too.  We reached our camp about noon.  And then had to pitch tents in the hotest son and heat I ever experienced.  Some of the boys got to hot and had to be taken to the hospital.    After camp was put in order then we begain to look around for something to eat.  We was all or nearly all broke.  Not having received a pay day yet.  So we could not buy anything and had to eat what they gave us or do without anything to eat.  And what they give us was terrible rocky.  We had to drill in Jacksonville like troopers in the deep sand and hot sun.  So the result was that lots of the boys got sick.  And a few I believe died about 20 in the regiment. For the first two weeks after we got to Camp Cuba Libre we got nothing to eat at all hardly.  Only hardtack, bacon and potatoes.  We almost starved to death.  There was all kind of drilling and reviews all the time.  We was at Jacksonville Secretary of War Alger reviewed us two different times while there.  About a month before we left Jacksonville there was three days of awful bad rain and windy weather (and I was on guard during the spell and got we and chilled and taken sick immediately after) so I do not know what happen the last part of the encampment there I got a sick furlogh and was sent home for 30 days.  Soon after the regiment to Savannah GA.  I was at home for 24 days and I seen the best time of my life I think.  When on my arrival at camp near the City of Savannah, GA I found a real nice camp.  And the people of Georgia was very hospitable and treated us so much nicer than the people of Fla.  We did not have to drill so much as we did at Camp Cuba Libre and have a lots better time here than we have any where yet. Well this is Nov and the weather is getting cool.  And camp life is just the same here as any where else.  Thanksgiving is here and we are going to have a good dinner today the ladies of Savannah is going to come out and give us a fine dinner.  This is one Thanksgiving day I will never forget.  I was on guard at brigade headquarters and when I go to our mess hall at noon the Co cook had cooked some turkeys with the _____ in them and the boys were all cursing him for ruining their dinner.  But I see the turkeys was eat just the same.  This is fine eating.  Just think old baked turkey like we get at home, hardtack and beans are tough since our fine dinner.  Weather is still cool and very uncomfortable sleeping in tents. Thanks to the kind ladies of Savannah for our bountiful repast.  They will always have a warm place in the hearts of the soldiers of the 7th Army Corps. The same old thing is camp drill and guard duty reviews.  To March before Big ___ to show ourselves.  We was on review the other day for President McKinley .  He is a fine looking man.  Soon will be Christmas this is the 15th of December and pay day.  The boys will all be drunk for a few days or until their money is all gone.  And all kind of gambling this night and there is a hot time in the old camp.  16th boys still drunk and gambling to a finish.  Boys are all feeling bad for their gay time as long as their money lasted.  The is only a bugle call the soldier like to hear and the are recall and mess call.  Christmas is here and the boys are all broke and trying to borrow money and give 50 cents on the dollar until next pay day.  But there is none in camp so we will not have a very high time today. Well the prospects are that we will start for Cuba in a few days.  Well this is the last of December.  There was a little ice here last night.  It was colder than usual  (last day of 1898).  New Years day and I am on guard again.  Pretty cold day. First day of 1899 bright and clear.  This is a holliday and we have got nothing to do only __ a time.  Well this is night and there is big fires everywhere in camp.   For about 2 oclock this afternoon we received orders to get ready to start for Cuba tomorrow and all of the old rubbish is being burned.  2nd day of January 1899 we broke camp today at about 10 am and about 2 pm we started for the transport in Savannah Harbor.  Loaded on about 11 ___ and will remain in the harbor all night waiting for the 4th Ills to load which will be completed along in the early morning sometime.  The transport is an extra large vessel and there is going to be 2 regiments put on board for Havana City, Cuba. 3rd Jan 10 A.M.  Bands playing and the wharf are lined with people waving farewell to soldier friends.  Larg crowd [two pages missing] Rise and it was sight I ever beheld in all my life.  The sun came up like a big ball of fire over in the east.  Out of a blue waste of water and to meet a clear blue sky.  We cant see no sign of land today this being the third day of out (1/5/99).  We will get to Havana sometime tomorrow.  And I will sure be glad of it for I am still sea sick.  So is lots of the other boys sick yet. We are still having fine weather for the voyage over the pond to Cuba.  The sun is hot today and we cant see anything but blue water and sky.  We are now passing the Florida Keys.  About 3 oclock P.M. and now and then we can see a glimpse of a lighthouse and island. This is the 6th and about 2 pm.  We will sight Havana the sailor says this pm.  This is also a beautiful day.  And the sea sickness has left us and all the boys are feeling fine.  We can now see the north shore of Cuba. 12 oclock noon and in 2 more hours we will pass Moro Castle and get into Havana Harbor.  This is now the sight of my life.   Passing Moro and the bands are playing the old march song of Dixie and the boys are seeing who can see the most I think. We are now in Havana Harbor and can see the wreck of the Maine.  From where we lay it is all rusty and eaten by the salt water.  And when we first came into the harbor there was ______ flying around and one was sitting on the mast of the wreck. Havana bay is a dirty vast old __ hole of a place and the water smell terribly of ____.  Al the refuse of the city is brought here and dumped into the harbor.  To see the big vessles lying about __ of nights is quite a site for us had never seen anything of the kind in our lives.  Well this is night and we see the search lights on the big war vessles from the deck of the transport. Nine oclock and we have to turn in for tapps is just sounding.  And that means go to bed. (so good night) 7th of January /99 Morning have just got out of my bunk and cant find any water to drink but what is salty.  We will get off the transport some time today.  Brother Edd has got the measles and was taken to the hospital this morning.  Lots of the men are having the measles it seems.  As though the sea voyage brought them on them.  We don’t get much to eat while on the transport. This is about noon and we are expecting to get ashore some time today. 2:30 PM and we are lining up to leave the boat some of the men are already off and the Cos are" [Diary ends] July 14, 2007 Last Surviving Veterans of the Spanish American War There are no longer any veterans surviving from the Spanish American War today. The last surviving veteran was Jones Morgan, an African American. Mr. Jones passed away in Richmond, Virginia on August 29, 1993 at the incredible age of 110 years, 10 months and 6 days. Mr. Jones had served as a member of the U.S. Cavalry (either 9th or 10th) as a cook and horse wrangler. He has served from 1896 to 1900. The last "Rough Rider" was Jesse Langdon. He passed away on June 28, 1975. Langdon served in K Troop. The last member of the 71st New York to pass away was Ralph Waldo Taylor of Pompano Beach, Florida. He passed away on May 15, 1987 at the age of 105. He had served in Company K. July 14, 2007 Buffalo Soldiers at San Juan Hill The following article derives from a paper the author delivered at the 1998 Conference of Army Historians in Bethesda, Maryland. Finding the middle, where the truth sometimes rests, requires you to know the edges. When it comes to responsibility for the victory of the United States Army on San Juan Heights, Cuba, on 1 July 1898, the edges are easy to find. On one side, there is the Teddy-centric view, first and most clearly expressed in the writings of Lt. Col. Theodore Roosevelt of the 1st Volunteer Cavalry Regiment—the legendary Rough Riders. Roosevelt’s memoir of Cuba so emphasized his own role that Mr. Dooley, the barroom pundit created by humorist Peter Finley Dunne, said the book should have been called "Alone in Cuba." Roosevelt augmented his campaign of self-promotion by carrying along his personal publicist. Richard Harding Davis’ dispatches from the front, picked up by many newspapers and magazines, spread the word of TR’s heroics. They also followed a time-honored tradition. George Custer had taken a reporter on the 1874 expedition that discovered gold in the Black Hills, and Nelson Miles had had one along to record his exploits against the tribes of the southern plains.1 Now Davis, of the New York Herald, did the same—essentially providing TR with PR.2 The view that Teddy Roosevelt dominated the battle at San Juan Heights still has adherents. I saw first-hand evidence last February, when I made a presentation for African-American History Month at Oyster Bay, New York, the great man’s home. The draft press release announced that I would be talking about Medal of Honor heroes among Buffalo Soldiers, the black regulars who had served on the frontier and who also fought in Cuba. The notice went on to assert that these soldiers had "assisted" TR in achieving victory at San Juan Hill. Clearly the text implied that the more than 2,000 black troopers dodging bullets and pushing their way resolutely forward in the Cuban sun were supporting players. TR still got top billing. Lately, a competing view has emerged to challenge Teddy-centric claims. This new assertion puts the Buffalo Soldiers at the center of the Cuban fighting, relegating Roosevelt to a supporting role. Most recently this view was stated by Edward Van Zile Scott in his 1996 book, The Unwept. According to Scott, "in the Spanish-American War of 1898, veteran black troops . . . were more responsible than any other group for the United States’ victory."3 The new interpretation replaces one extreme position, represented by the emphasis on TR, with another, focusing on the contributions of African-American soldiers. These competing viewpoints represent the edges but don’t help us understand what happened on the battlefield. For that, we have to look at the order of battle, read the reports of the commanders, and follow the movements of all units on maps of the campaign. The record shows that about 15,000 American troops of Maj. Gen. William R. Shafter’s Fifth Army Corps participated in the battles on the high ground near Santiago, Cuba, on 1 July 1898. About 13,000 of them were white; 2,000 or so were black. Of the twenty-six regiments in this force, three were volunteer organizations; the vast majority were regulars. More than 200 soldiers were killed in action, and nearly 30 of those who fell were from the four black Regular Army regiments, the 9th and 10th Cavalry and the 24th and 25th Infantry.4 There were two major battles that day, one at El Caney and one on San Juan Heights. Both objectives were east of the city, with El Caney the more northerly of the two. Brig. Gen. Henry W. Lawton commanded his own 2d Division and the Independent Brigade, a force of about 6,500, which took El Caney. Lawton’s troops included more than 500 men of the black 25th Infantry. This regiment was in the thick of the four-hour fight, and one of its members, Pvt. Thomas Butler of Baltimore, was among the first to enter the blockhouse on the hill.5 The other key objective, San Juan Heights, was closer to the city, about one mile directly east of it. San Juan has historically received more attention than El Caney, and for good reason. It was the main objective, after all, and was attacked by 8,000 troops of Brig. Gen. Jacob F. Kent’s 1st Division and the dismounted Cavalry Division, commanded on this day by Brig. Gen. Samuel S. Sumner. San Juan Heights had two high spots along its north-south axis, one called San Juan Hill and the other later named Kettle Hill by the troops. Both were part of the same objective. In addition to being more important than El Caney as an objective, San Juan was also Theodore Roosevelt’s stage. Roosevelt, of whom it was said that he never attended a wedding without wishing he was the bride or a funeral without wishing he was the corpse, was the unquestioned star of San Juan and by extension of the entire Cuban campaign. The commander of his regiment, Col. Leonard Wood, had been conveniently promoted out of the way, so Lieutenant Colonel Roosevelt had the Rough Riders all to himself. But he did not have the battle for San Juan Heights all to himself. There were after all 8,000 men in the operation, a total of thirteen Regular Army regiments and two regiments of volunteers, including TR’s Rough Riders. The force included about 1,250 black troopers of the 9th and 10th Cavalry in Sumner’s Cavalry Division and the 24th Infantry in Kent’s 1st Division. Critics have complained that Roosevelt erroneously and undeservedly claimed credit for the victory at San Juan Hill, when he actually was involved in the assault on Kettle Hill. In fact, he did play a prominent role in the fight for Kettle Hill. His volunteers, part of Sumner’s dismounted cavalry force, reached the top of Kettle Hill alongside black and white regulars. The actions of Color Sgt. George Berry of the 10th Cavalry, who carried the colors of the white 3d Cavalry up that hill along with his own regiment’s standard, reflected the shared nature of the operation, with black and white regulars and Rough Riders fighting side by side and with one group sometimes indistinguishable from the others. Once Roosevelt reached the top of Kettle Hill, he watched Kent’s troops begin to overrun their objective on San Juan Hill. Still eager for a fight, he urged the men around him to follow him into the fray on San Juan. That’s when he found out what happens when you sound a charge and nobody comes. Only a handful of soldiers heard the great man, and he found himself at the head of an assault that consisted of five soldiers. Roosevelt retreated, regrouped, and assembled a more respectable force that reached the Spanish trenches in time to participate in the last of the fight. "There was," he said, "very great confusion at this time, the different regiments being completely intermingled—white regulars, colored regulars, and Rough Riders."6 Roosevelt’s observation accurately characterized the mix of troops in the battle for the heights. Overall, the great majority of these soldiers were regulars; the rest were volunteers. "Their battles," Timothy Egan wrote in an article entitled "The American Century’s Opening Shot," in the New York Times of Saturday, 6 June 1998, "were sharp, vicious crawls through jungle terrain in killing heat."7 Regulars and volunteers, blacks and whites, fought side by side, endured the blistering heat and driving rain, and shared food and drink as well as peril and discomfort. They forged a victory that did not belong primarily to TR, nor did it belong mainly to the Buffalo Soldiers. It belonged to all of them. Despite the fact that these groups shared the victory and despite the attention that gravitated toward TR, the post-battle spotlight shone brightly on the Buffalo Soldiers. Since the Reorganization Act of 1866, their regiments had mainly served in the remotest corners of the West. They had fought against the Comanches and Kiowa in the 1860s and 1870s and the Apaches between 1877 and 1886, and they had seen service in the Pine Ridge campaign of 1890–1891. Most of this duty had been performed in obscurity.8 But Cuba was different. All eyes that were not on TR seemed to focus on the Buffalo Soldiers. For the first time they stood front and center on the national stage. A number of mainstream (that is, white) periodicals recounted their exploits, as nurses in the yellow fever hospital at Siboney as well as on the battlefield, and reviewed their history, mostly favorably.9 Books by black authors recounted the regiments’ service in Cuba and in previous wars and reminded those who cared to pay attention that the war with Spain did not represent the first instance in which black soldiers answered the nation’s call to arms.10 In an age of increasing racism that was hardening into institutionalized segregation throughout the South and affecting the lives of black Americans everywhere, the Buffalo Soldiers were race heroes. Black newspapers and magazines tracked their movements and reported their activities. Poetry, dramas, and songs all celebrated their service and valor.11 As Rayford Logan, dean of a generation of black historians—and my undergraduate adviser—later wrote, "Negroes had little, at the turn of the century, to help sustain our faith in ourselves except the pride that we took in the 9th and 10th Cavalry, the 24th and 25th Infantry. Many Negro homes had prints of the famous charge of the colored troops up San Juan Hill. They were our Ralph Bunche, Marian Anderson, Joe Louis and Jackie Robinson."12 Almost one hundred years passed before the nation rediscovered the Buffalo Soldiers. The process started with the 1967 publication of William Leckie’s The Buffalo Soldiers and culminated in 1992, with the dedication by General Colin Powell of the Buffalo Soldier statue at Fort Leavenworth, Kansas. For the Buffalo Soldiers, "the American century" is ending the way it had started. In a period of increasing informal segregation, growing dissatisfaction with affirmative action, and the spreading emphasis on a separate African-American minority culture, books, plays, movies, and even phone cards celebrate the service of these troopers. In what appears to be a disconcertingly similar setting of deteriorating race relations, the Buffalo Soldiers have returned to take their place among America’s heroes. by July 15, 2007 A Colored Hero in the Navy Elijah B. Tunnell was employed as cabin cook on the Winslow. The boat, under a severe fire from masked batteries of the Spanish on shore, was disabled. The Wilmington came to her rescue, the enemy meanwhile still pouring on a heavy fire. It was difficult to get the "line" fastened so that the Winslow could be towed off out of range of the Spanish guns. Realizing the danger the boat and crew were in, and anxious to be of service, Tunnell left his regular work and went on deck to assist in "making fast" the two boats, and while thus engaged a shell came, which, bursting over the group of workers, killed him and three others. It has been stated in newspaper reports of this incident that it was an ill-aimed shell of one of the American boats that killed Tunnell and Bagley. Tunnell was taken on board the Wilmington with both legs blown off, and fearfully mutilated. Turning to those about him he asked, "Did we win in the fight boys?" The reply was, "Yes." He said, "Then I die happy." While others fell at the post of duty it may be said of this brave Negro that he fell while doing more than his duty. He might have kept out of harm's way if he had desired, but seeing the situation he rushed forward to relieve it as best he could, and died a "volunteer" in service, doing what others ought to have done. All honor to the memory of Elijah B. Tunnell, who, if not the first, certainly simultaneous with the first, martyr of the Spanish-American war. While our white fellow-citizens justly herald the fame of Ensign Bagley, who was known to the author from his youth, let our colored patriots proclaim the heroism of Tunnell of Accomac. While not ranking as an official in the navy, yet he was brave, he was faithful and we may inscribe over his grave that "he died doing what he could for his country." July 15, 2007 Wounded Soldier's Story Jacob A. Riis in The Outlook gives the following interesting reading concerning the colored troopers in an article entitled "Roosevelt and His Men": "It was one of the unexpected things in this campaign that seems destined to set so many things right that out of it should come the appreciation of the colored soldier as man and brother by those even who so lately fought to keep him a chattel. It fell to the lot of General 'Joe' Wheeler, the old Confederate warrior, to command the two regiments of colored troops, the Ninth and Tenth Cavalry, and no one will bear readier testimony than he to the splendid record they made. Of their patience under the manifold hardships of roughing it in the tropics, their helpfulness in the camp and their prowess in battle, their uncomplaining suffering when lying wounded and helpless. Stories enough are told to win for them fairly the real brotherhood with their white-skinned fellows which they crave. The most touching of the many I heard was that of a Negro trooper, who, struck by a bullet that cut an artery in his neck, was lying helpless, in danger of bleeding to death, when a Rough Rider came to his assistance. There was only one thing to be done--to stop the bleeding till a surgeon came. A tourniquet could not be applied where the wound was. The Rough Rider put his thumb on the artery and held it there while he waited. The fighting drifted away over the hill. He followed his comrades with longing eyes till the last was lost to sight. His place was there, but if he abandoned the wounded cavalryman it was to let him die. He dropped his gun and stayed. Not until the battle was won did the surgeon come that way, but the trooper's life was saved. He told of it in the hospital with tears in his voice: 'He done that to me, he did; stayed by me an hour and a half, and me only a nigger.'" July 15, 2007 Colonel Theodore B. Roosevelt Tells of the Bravery of Colored Soldiers When Colonel Theodore Roosevelt returned from the command of the famous Rough Riders, he delivered a farewell address to his men, in which he made the following kind reference to the gallant Negro soldiers: "Now, I want to say just a word more to some of the men I see standing around not of your number. I refer to the colored regiments, who occupied the right and left flanks of us at Guásimas, the Ninth and Tenth cavalry regiments. The Spaniards called them 'Smoked Yankees,' but we found them to be an excellent breed of Yankees. I am sure that I speak the sentiments of officers and men in the assemblage when I say that between you and the other cavalry regiments there exists a tie which we trust will never be broken."--Colored American. The foregoing compliments to the Negro soldiers by Colonel Roosevelt started up an avalanche of additional praise for them, out of which the fact came, that but for the Ninth and Tenth Cavalry (colored) coming up at Las Guásimas, destroying the Spanish block house and driving the Spaniards off, when Roosevelt and his men had been caught in a trap, with a barbed-wire fence on one side and a precipice on the other, not only the brave Capron and Fish, but the whole of his command would have been annihilated by the Spanish sharp-shooters, who were firing with smokeless powder under cover, and picking off the Rough Riders one by one, who could not see the Spaniards. To break the force of this unfavorable comment on the Rough Riders, it is claimed that Colonel Roosevelt made the following criticism of the colored soldiers in general and of a few of them in particular, in an article written by him for the April Scribner; and a letter replying to the Colonel's strictures, follows by Sergeant Holliday, who was an "eye-witness" to the incident: Colonel Roosevelt's criticism was, in substance, that colored soldiers were of no avail without white officers; that when the white commissioned officers are killed or disabled, colored non-commissioned officers could not be depended upon to keep up a charge already begun; that about a score of colored infantrymen, who had drifted into his command, weakened on the hill at San Juan under the galling Spanish fire, and started to the rear, stating that they intended finding their regiments, or to assist the wounded; whereupon he drew his revolver and ordered them to return to ranks and there remain, and that he would shoot the first man who didn't obey him; and that after that he had no further trouble. Colonel Roosevelt is sufficiently answered in the following letter of Sergeant Holliday, and the point especially made by many eye-witnesses (white) who were engaged in that fight is, as related in Chapter V, of this book, that the Negro troops made the charges both at San Juan and El Caney after nearly all their officers had been killed or wounded. Upon what facts, therefore, does Colonel Roosevelt base his conclusions that Negro soldiers will not fight without commissioned officers, when the only real test of this question happened around Santiago and showed just the contrary of what he states? We prefer to take the results at El Caney and San Juan as against Colonel Roosevelt's imagination. July 15, 2007 General Nelson A. Miles, Pays a Tribute to the Negro Soldiers Major-General Nelson A. Miles, Commander-in-Chief of the army of the United States spoke at the Peace Jubilee at Chicago, October 11th, and said: "While the chivalry of the South and the yeomanry of the North vied with their devotion to the cause of their country and in their pride in its flag which floated over all, it's a glorious fact that patriotism was not confined to any one section or race for the sacrifice, bravery and fortitude. The white race was accompanied by the gallantry of the black as they swept over intrenched lines and later volunteered to succor the sick, nurse the dying and bury the dead in the hospitals and the Cuban camps." "This was grandly spoken, and we feel gratified at this recognition of the valor of one of the best races of people the world has ever seen.""We are coming, boys; it's a little slow and tiresome, but we are coming."--Colored American. At a social reunion of the Medal of Honor Legion held a few evenings since to welcome home two of their members, General Nelson A. Miles, commanding the army of the United States, and Colonel M. Emmett Urell, of the First District Columbia Volunteers, in the course of his remarks, General Miles paid the finest possible tribute to the splendid heroism and soldierly qualities evidenced by the men of the 9th and 10th Cavalry, and 24th and 25th United States Infantry in the late Santiago campaign, which he epitomized as "without a parallel in the history of the world." At the close of his remarks, Major C.A. Fleetwood, the only representative of the race present, in behalf of the race extended their heartfelt and warmest thanks for such a magnificent tribute from such a magnificent soldier and man.--Colored American. July 15, 2007 Cleveland Moffitt~Describes the Heroism of a "Black Color Bearer" "Having praised our war leaders sufficiently, in some cases more than sufficiently (witness Hobson), let us give honor to some of the humbler ones, who fought obscurely, but did fine things nevertheless." Sergeant Berry, The first soldier who reached the Block House on San Juan Hill and hoisted the American flag in a hail of Spanish bullets. "There was Sergeant Berry, for instance, of the Tenth Cavalry, who might have boasted his meed of kisses, too, had he been a white man. At any rate, he rescued the colors of a white regiment from unseemly trampling and bore them safely through the bullets to the top of San Juan hill. Now, every one knows that the standard of a troop is guarded like a man's own soul, or should be, and how it came that this Third Cavalry banner was lying on the ground that day is something that may never be rightly known. Some white man had left it there, many white men had let it stay there, but Berry, a black man, saw it fluttering in shame and paused in his running long enough to catch it up and lift it high overhead beside his own banner--for he was a color-bearer of the Tenth." "Then, with two flags flying above him, and two heavy staves to bear, this powerful negro (he is literally a giant in strength and stature) charged the heights, while white men and black men cheered him as they pressed behind. Who shall say what temporary demoralization there may have been in this troop of the Third at that critical moment, or what fresh courage may have been fired in them by that black man's act! They say Berry yelled like a demon as he rushed against the Spaniards, and I, for one, am willing to believe that his battle-cry brought fighting energy to his own side as well as terror to the enemy.""After the fight one of the officers of the Third Cavalry sought Berry out and asked him to give back the trophy fairly won by him, and his to keep, according to the usages of war. And the big Negro handed back the banner with a smile and light word. He had saved the colors and rallied the troop, but it didn't matter much. They could have the flag if they wanted it." "There are some hundreds of little things like this that we might as well bear in mind, we white men, the next time we start out to decry the Negro!" President McKinley recognizes the worth of Negro Soldiers President McKinley recognizes the worth of Negro Soldiers by Promotion Washington, July 30.--Six colored non-commissioned officers who rendered particularly gallant service in the actions around Santiago on July 1st and 2d have been appointed second lieutenants in the two colored immune regiments recently organized under special act of Congress. These men are: Sergeants William Washington, Troop F, and John C. Proctor, Troop I, of the 9th Cavalry, and Sergeants William McBryar, Company H; Wyatt Hoffman, Company G; Macon Russell, Company H, and Andrew J. Smith, Company B, of the 25th Infantry, commanded by Colonel Daggett. Jacob C. Smith, Sergeant Pendergrass, Lieutenant Ray, Sergeant Horace W. Bivins, Lieutenant E.L. Baker, Lieutenant J.H. Hill, Lieutenant Buck.--N.Y. World. These promotions were made into the volunteer regiments, which were mustered out after the war, thus leaving the men promoted in the same rank they were before promotion if they chose to re-enlist in the regular army. They got no permanent advancement by this act of the President, but the future may develop better things for them. July 15, 2007 Competent to be Officers Competent to be Officers, The verdict of General Thomas J. Morgan, after a study of the Negro's quality as a soldier General Thomas J. Morgan belongs to that class of Caucasian observers who are able to think clearly upon the Negro problem in all of its phases, and who have not only the breadth of intelligence to form just and generous opinions, but who possess that rarer quality, the courage to give them out openly to the country. General Morgan contributes the following article to the New York Independent, analyzing the motives which underlie the color line in the army. He has had wide experience in military affairs, and his close contact with Negro soldiers during the civil war entitles him to speak with authority. General Morgan says: "The question of the color line has assumed an acute stage, and has called forth a good deal of feeling. The various Negro papers in the country are very generally insisting that if the Negro soldiers are to be enlisted, Negro officers should be appointed to command them. One zealous paper is clamoring for the appointment, immediately, by the President, of a Negro Major-General. The readers of The Independent know very well that during the civil war there were enlisted in the United States army 200,000 Negro soldiers under white officers, the highest position assigned to a black man being that of first sergeant, or of regimental sergeant-major. The Negroes were allowed to wear chevrons, but not shoulder straps or epaulets. Although four Negro regiments have been incorporated in the regular army, and have rendered exceptionally effective service on the plains and elsewhere for a whole generation, there are to-day no Negro officers in the service. A number of young men have been appointed as cadets at West Point, but the life has not been by any means an easy one. The only caste or class with caste distinctions that exists in the republic is found in the army; army officers are, par excellence, the aristocrats; nowhere is class feeling so much cultivated as among them; nowhere is it so difficult to break down the established lines. Singularly enough, though entrance to West Point is made very broad, and a large number of those who go there to be educated at the expense of the Government have no social position to begin with, and no claims to special merit, and yet, after having been educated at the public expense, and appointed to life positions, they seem to cherish the feeling that they are a select few, entitled to special consideration, and that they are called upon to guard their class against any insidious invasions. Of course there are honorable exceptions. There are many who have been educated at West Point who are broad in their sympathies, democratic in their ideas, and responsive to every appeal of philanthropy and humanity; but the spirit of West Point has been opposed to the admission of Negroes into the ranks of commissioned officers, and the opposition to the commissioning of black men emanating from the army will go very far toward the defeat of any project of that kind." "To make the question of the admission of Negroes into the higher ranks of commissioned officers more difficult is the fact that the organization of Negro troops under the call of the President for volunteers to carry on the war with Spain, has been left chiefly to the Governors of states. Very naturally the strong public sentiment against the Negro, which obtains almost universally in the South, has thus far prevented the recognition of his right to be treated precisely as the white man is treated. It would be, indeed, almost revolutionary for any Southern Governor to commission a Negro as a colonel of a regiment, or even a captain of a company. (Since this was written two Negro colonels have been appointed--in the Third North Carolina and Eighth Illinois.) Even where there are exceptions to this rule, they are notable exceptions. Everywhere through the South Negro volunteers are made to feel that they are not upon the same plane as white volunteers." "In a recent conversation with the Adjutant General of the army, I was assured by him that in the organization of the ten regiments of immunes which Congress has authorized, the President had decided that five of them should be composed of Negroes, and that while the field and staff officers and captains are to be white, the lieutenants may be Negroes. If this is done it will mark a distinct step in advance of any taken hitherto. It will recognize partially, at least, the manhood of the Negro, and break down that unnatural bar of separation now existing. If a Negro is a lieutenant, he will command his company in the absence of the captain. He can wear epaulets, and be entitled to all the rights and privileges 'of an officer and a gentleman;' he is no longer doomed to inferiority. In case of battle, where bullets have no respect of persons, and do not draw the line at color, it may easily happen that a regiment or battalion will do its best work in the face of the enemy under the command of a Negro chief. Thus far the Government has been swift to recognize heroism and efficiency, whether performed by Commodore Dewey at Manila or Lieutenant Hobson at Santiago, and it can hardly be otherwise than that it will be ready to recognize exceptional prowess and skill when performed by a Negro officer." "All, perhaps, which the Negroes themselves, or their friends, have a right to ask in their behalf is, that they shall have a chance to show the stuff they are made of. The immortal Lincoln gave them this chance when he admitted them to wear the blue and carry a musket; and right manfully did they justify his confidence. There was not better fighting done during the civil war than was done by some of the Negro troops. With my experience, in command of 5,000 Negro soldiers, I would, on the whole, prefer, I think, the command of a corps of Negro troops to that of a corps of white troops. With the magnificent record of their fighting qualities on many a hard-contested field, it is not unreasonable to ask that a still further opportunity shall be extended to them in commissioning them as officers, as well as enlisting them as soldiers." "Naturally and necessarily the question of fitness for official responsibility is the prime test and ought to be applied, and if Negroes cannot be found of sufficient intelligence or preparation for the duties incumbent on army officers, nobody should object to the places being given to qualified white men. But so long as we draw no race line of distinction as against Germans or Irishmen, and institute no test of religion, politics or culture, we ought not to erect an artificial barrier of color. If the Negroes are competent they should be commissioned. If they are incompetent they should not be trusted with the grave responsibilities attached to official position. I believe they are competent." History of Negro Soldiers in the Spanish-American War, and other items of Interest, 1899 July 15, 2007 Commissioned for Their Bravery at El Caney: On July 14th it was decided to make a demonstration in front of Santiago, to draw the fire of the enemy and locate his position. Two companies of colored soldiers (25th Infantry) were selected for this purpose, actually deployed as skirmishers and started in advance. General Shafter, watching the movement from a distant hill, saw that such a movement meant to sacrifice those men, without any or much good resulting, therefore had them recalled. Had the movement been completed it is probable that not a man would have escaped death or serious wounds. When the news came that General Toral had decided to surrender, the 25th Infantry was a thousand yards or more nearer the city of Santiago than any regiment in the army, having entrenched themselves along the railroad leading into the city. The following enlisted men of the 25th Infantry were commissioned for their bravery at El Caney:   July 15, 2007 Buffalo Troopers, The Name By Which Negro Soldiers Are Known They Comprise Several of the Crack Regiments in Our Army-The Indians Stand in Abject Terror of them-Their Awful Yells Won a Battle with the Redskins. "It is not necessary to revert to the Civil war to prove that American Negroes are faithful, devoted wearers of uniforms," says a Washington man, who has seen service in both the army and the navy. "There are at the present time four regiments of Negro soldiers in the regular army of the United States-two outfits of cavalry and two of infantry. All four of these regiments have been under fire in important Indian campaigns, and there is yet to be recorded a single instance of a man in any of the four layouts showing the white feather, and the two cavalry regiments of Negroes have, on several occasions, found themselves in very serious situations. While the fact is well known out on the frontier, I don't remember ever having seen it mentioned back here that an American Indian has a deadly fear of an American Negro. The most utterly reckless, dare-devil savage of the copper hue stands literally in awe of a Negro, and the blacker the Negro the more the Indian quails. I can't understand why this should be, for the Indians decline to give their reasons for fearing the black men, but the fact remains that even a very bad Indian will give the mildest-mannered Negro imaginable all the room he wants, and to spare, as any old regular army soldier who has frontiered will tell you. The Indians, I fancy, attribute uncanny and eerie qualities to the blacks." "The cavalry troop to which I belonged soldiered alongside a couple of troops of the 9th Cavalry, a black regiment, up in the Sioux country eight or nine years ago. We were performing chain guard, hemming-in duty, and it was our chief business to prevent the savages from straying from the reservation. We weren't under instructions to riddle them if they attempted to pass our guard posts, but were authorized to tickle them up to any reasonable extent, short of maiming them, with our bayonets, if any of them attempted to bluff past us. Well, the men of my troop had all colors of trouble while on guard in holding the savages in. The Ogalalla would hardly pay any attention to the white sentries of the chain guard, and when they wanted to pass beyond the guard limits they would invariably pick out a spot for passage that was patrolled by a white 'post-humper.' But the guards of the two black troops didn't have a single run-in with the savages. The Indians made it a point to remain strictly away from the Negro soldiers' guard posts. Moreover, the black soldiers got ten times as much obedience from the Indians loafing around the tepees and wickleup as did we of the white outfit. The Indians would fairly jump to obey the uniformed Negroes. I remember seeing a black sergeant make a minor chief go down to a creek to get a pail of water--an unheard of thing, for the chiefs, and even the ordinary bucks among the Sioux, always make their squaws perform this sort of work. This chief was sunning himself, reclining, beside his tepee, when his squaw started with the bucket for the creek some distance away. The Negro sergeant saw the move. He walked up to the lazy, grunting savage." "'Look a-yeah, yo' spraddle-nosed, yalluh voodoo nigguh,' said the black sergeant--he was as black as a stovepipe--to the blinking chief, 'jes' shake yo' no-count bones an' tote dat wattuh yo'se'f. Yo' ain' no bettuh to pack wattuh dan Ah am, yo' heah me.'" "The heap-much Indian chief didn't understand a word of what the Negro sergeant said to him, but he understands pantomime all right, and when the black man in uniform grabbed the pail out of the squaw's hand and thrust it into the dirty paw of the chief the chief went after that bucket of water, and he went a-loping, too." "The Sioux will hand down to their children's children the story of a charge that a couple of Negro cavalry troops made during the Pine Ridge troubles. It was of the height of the fracas, and the bad Indians were regularly lined up for battle. Those two black troops were ordered to make the initial swoop upon them. You know the noise one black man can make when he gets right down to the business of yelling. Well, these two troops of blacks started their terrific whoop in unison when they were a mile away from the waiting Sioux, and they got warmed up and in better practice with every jump their horses made. I give you my solemn word that in the ears of us of the white outfit, stationed three miles away, the yelps those two Negro troops of cavalry gave sounded like the carnival whooping of ten thousand devils. The Sioux weren't scared a little bit by the approaching clouds of alkali dust, but, all the same, when the two black troops were more than a quarter of a mile away the Indians broke and ran as if the old boy himself were after them, and it was then an easy matter to round them up and disarm them. The chiefs afterward confessed that they were scared out by the awful howling of the black soldiers." "Ever since the war the United States navy has had a fair representation of Negro bluejackets, and they make first-class naval tars. There is not a ship in the navy to-day that hasn't from six to a dozen, anyhow, of Negroes on its muster rolls. The Negro sailors' names very rarely get enrolled on the bad conduct lists. They are obedient, sober men and good seamen. There are many petty officers among them."--The Planet. [In the city of New Orleans, in 1866, two thousand two hundred and sixty-six ex-slaves were recruited for the service. None but the largest and blackest Negroes were accepted. From these were formed the Twenty-fourth and Twenty-fifth Infantry, and the Ninth and Tenth Cavalry. All four are famous fighting regiments, yet the two cavalry commands have earned the proudest distinction. While the record of the Ninth Cavalry, better known as the "Nigger Ninth," in its thirty-two years of service in the Indian wars, in the military history of the border, stands without a peer; and is, without exception, the most famous fighting regiment in the United States service.]--Author. History of Negro Soldiers in the Spanish-American War, and other items of Interest, 1899 Sketch of Sixth Virginia Volunteers Sketch of Sixth Virginia Volunteers The Sixth Virginia Volunteer Infantry, U.S.V., consisted of two battalions, first and second Battalion Infantry Virginia Volunteers (State militia), commanded respectively by Maj. J.B. Johnson and Maj. W.H. Johnson. In April, 1898, the war cloud was hanging over the land. Governor J. Hoge Tyler, of Virginia, under instructions from the War Department, sent to all Virginia volunteers inquiring how many men in the respective commands were willing to enlist in the United States volunteer service in the war against Spain. How many would go in or out of the United States. Commonwealth Of Virginia

Battle of San Juan Hill

In what two-player Milton Bradley board game, introduced in 1961, do players try to capture the other player's flag on a 10×10 board?

Julia Robb's Blog Julia Robb's Blog Rocky Mountain Christmas: John Monnett and his Yuletide Stories  MERRY CHRISTMAS!! This month I’m interviewing historian and author John Monnett about his book Rocky Mountain Christmas: Yuletide Stories of the West, published in 1987. Monnett filled the book with everything from the “Bill of Fare” John Fremont’s men “enjoyed” for Christmas dinner in 1848, to what prairie pioneers gave each other when pickings were slim.       Monnett, who lives in Colorado, has also written, among others: Where a Hundred Soldiers Were Killed, Massacre At Cheyenne Hole, Tell Them We Are Going Home, The Battle Of Beecher Island, Eyewitness to the Fetterman Fight and The Indian War Of 1867-1869.     My first question is about Zebulon Pike, the famous explorer for whom Pike’s Peak was named. Pike attempted to climb the mountain in 1806.      ROBB TO READERS, Pike was a soldier in the U.S. Army and he explored when ordered to do so; not that he was reluctant. On his first expedition Pike and his 24 men went all the way from St. Louis to the Rockies in an attempt to “ascertain the direction, extent, and navigation of the Arkansas and Red Rivers.”   But exploring must have seemed a little challenging on Christmas Day, 1806. Pike and his men were snowed in, in the Rockies, without winter clothes or blankets.   They had already cut up their blankets to make socks and other garments.  Pike wrote he was forced to lay uncovered on the snow, “one side burning whilst the other was pierced with the cold wind.”   Luckily, a hunting party sent out on Christmas Eve did kill eight buffalo, so the men ate.      ROBB: Zebulon Pike and his expedition really had a hard Christmas in 1806. Can you tell us more about that?   MONNETT: They were snowbound in the Sangre de Cristo mountains above modern Salida, Colorado and near the San Luis Valley, one of the coldest areas of the state with temperatures reaching 40 below zero.  ROBB: John Fremont and his expedition were also snowed in while traveling through Southern Colorado, but in 1848, 42 years after Pike. Was the Christmas menu for “Camp Desolation” based on reality?     ROBB TO READERS, Thomas Breckenridge, a member of the expedition, wrote explorers were having the following:   Soup: Mule tail. Meats: Mule steak, fried mule, mule chops, stewed mule, damned mule, short ribs of mule with apple sauce (without the apple sauce), etc.   ROBB: Was this what they were really eating?   MONNETT: Fremont’s Christmas feast is probably part truth and part sarcasm. Played out Mules often fell victim to feasts if game was not plentiful. I think the “menu” reflected the malaise and boredom, and longing to be home of the men on the expedition.   ROBB: Can you tell us about the “Mountain Man’s Christmas” of 1813 and the part Flathead Indians played? (Flatheads were really the Bitterroot Salish, Kootenai and Pend d’Oreilles tribes.)  To achieve flat foreheads, the Indians wrapped their baby’s heads in a bandage and used a board, hinged to the cradle-board, to press down on the baby’s foreheads.     MONNETT: In 1813, white fur trappers were the minority group in the mountain West. As such they married into Indian tribes like the Flatheads, often to forge a trading alliance with the band, learned and spoke the native tongues, and shared customs with the Indians.   Economically, the two races depended on each other and mutually benefitted from trade.   Customs were also exchanged. The Indians referred to the white man’s feasting at Christmas as “the big eating” and the trappers and Indians eventually shared this tradition.    ROBB TO READERS: During one shared Christmas feast, the trappers roasted a heifer, but both the whites and the Indians declared the meat inedible.  They were used to the leaner buffalo.     Also, when the Flatheads appeared that Christmas they held Blackfoot captives, who they agreed to release in return for ammunition to use against Blackfoot raiders.      ROBB: Who was Sir St. George Gore and why did he travel to the Rocky Mountains?   MONNETT: Sir St. George Gore was a British nobleman and adventurer. Colorado’s Gore Mountain Range is named for him.   There were more than a few of these guys in the early 19th century. They were quite flamboyant. The Brits were fascinated with the American West to hunt, explore, and write about their adventures. Too often they exploited the game resources of the West.    Later they monopolized land for private hunting preserves. When game became exhausted they thankfully sold their “claims” and went home.       ROBB: Gore employed Jim Bridger as a guide. Can you tell us more about him?      MONNETT: Jim Bridger was perhaps the most famous Mountain Man in western history. He first came West in 1820 with the famous Ashley Expedition that opened the fur regions of the northern Rockies, thru the Dakotas, and into Wyoming and Montana.       He later scouted for the U. S. Army in 1865-1866 on the Bozeman Trail.  He knew the Sioux and Cheyenne intimately.      As a teenager in 1820 with Ashley, Bridger learned the trade of the mountain man. He was depicted as the young “James” in the movie The Revenant. He is credited with the discovery of the Great Salt Lake in Utah.    ROBB to Readers: For the record, Bridger married three Indian women and died in his 70’s, on his Missouri farm.    ROBB: Can you tell us how they celebrated Christmas in Taos in the 1840’s?    MONNETT: Southwestern traditions at Christmas are my favorite. They are a mixture of Anglo, Hispano, and Pueblo assimilations. The Santa Fe traders first brought paper bags to New Mexico that were used for the simple candle-lit luminaries we know today.     Passion plays, especially Las Posadas, where the community goes door to door on Christmas Eve looking for the Christ child, are a tradition still performed today.   Dances at the Pueblos mixed with Latin Mass are an age old tradition since Spanish Colonial times.    Some remote Hispano communities around Santa Fe and Taos still look for the Christmas spirits that dwell in the mountains and visit homes on Christmas Eve. They are both male and female beings, “Abuelos and Abuelas,” grandfathers and grandmothers.     ROBB: What did the pioneering Sutton family (who lived in a sod house, on the Dakota prairie) give each other for Christmas, and why?    MONNETT: During hard times, pictures of desirable items were cut from the pages of the catalogs and given as gifts. Even when life was often hard, pioneer families kept the spirit of Christmas alive with their innovative traditions.    Prior to close railroad connections, when permanent houses had yet to replace sod homes, Christmas was a simple affair with isolated families.    On the treeless prairie west of the 100th meridian sage bushes were often utilized as Christmas trees (Tumbleweeds did not arrive from Russia until the 1890s when railroads would deliver real Christmas trees to rural towns).     Ornaments were made from local materials and colored paper wrappers that had been saved all year. Straw dolls for girls, carved wooden toys for boys were often all that was available.   Published on December 10, 2016 16:48 • 5 views November 17, 2016 Ben Frankin reading the Declaration of Independence, just written by Thomas Jefferson, standing.                                     I didn’t vote for Donald Trump, and yet I understand why many people did: They were punishing our intellectual elites. Since the election, pundits have said this very thing. That media, politicians and the highest paid professionals  don’t understand or respect Middle America . Maybe true, but one important aspect has been forgotten–how many elite “historians” and writers undermine America’s heroes, like Wyatt Earp, and founding fathers like Thomas Jefferson.   I don’t believe this has been a conscious assault, but it has been, nonetheless, an assault, and it has taken a huge toll on American confidence and optimism.  Wyatt Earp No wonder so many Americans felt the need to strike back. Their heroes, the bedrock of their country, have been devalued, so their country has been devalued, and therefore they have been devalued. (Unfortunately, in my opinion, voters struck back the wrong way). But let me give you two examples. University of Virginia rotunda, designed by Thomas Jefferson.  This past week, students and professors at the University of Virginia criticized their president for quoting Thomas Jefferson, who founded their school. Protestors said Thomas Jefferson shouldn’t be used as a “moral compass” because he was a slave owner. This is the usual. For years, academics and writers have insisted Thomas Jefferson was repugnant and a hypocrite, not only because he was a slave owner but because he had (maybe? probably? nobody knows for sure) a slave mistress (Sally Hemings).  Sally Hemings and Thomas Jefferson~ from An American Scandal (2000) First, if Thomas Jefferson and Miss Hemings did have a relationship (and DNA proves someone in Mr. Jefferson’s family fathered her children), we don’t know the nature of their relationship and it is deluded to believe we do. Could they have loved each other?  We don’t know. Montecello, Jefferson’s home, designed by Jefferson  Does possibly having a slave mistress mean Thomas Jefferson should be denounced; that brilliant architect, statesman, president, inventor, writer of The Declaration of Independence, that rebel who helped ignite and lead our revolution?   Here’s what I say. It’s easy to feel morally superior in hindsight, and that must make a lot of folks feel good. Never mind that our founding fathers knew slavery was a moral evil, but one they couldn’t erase without destroying the new country. By 1776, the colonies were already invested in slavery.  So would these pompous highbrows prefer Jefferson and his ilk not have created the United States because it could not be created perfectly?  If you’re reading this blog and feel like attacking me: Don’t. I’m not defending slavery, which was a great evil. I’m attacking an odious moral superiority which has a pernicious effect on The United States. Second example, Wyatt Earp.  Earp has admirers and detractors, but his detractors usually make the same charges. They say Earp was not a hero because he and various partners owned saloons and Earp was a professional gambler while working in law enforcement. Earp was a scoundrel because his brother James owned brothels. Earp was a bad man because one or more of the men killed at the gunfight might have been unarmed. And gasp, because Earp and his brothers were ambitious and wanted to make money. I’m not kidding. These are the things writers and “historians” say about Earp. He wanted to make money and become successful in his society. The Gunfight at the OK Corral, by Thom Ross  But on Oct. 26, 1881, the day the Earps faced the “cowboys,” nobody condemned lawmen who owned saloons or gambled, James Earp was not a lawman, I don’t know if all three men killed at the OK Corral (actually, in the vicinity of) were armed and nobody knows to this day. Down Front Street, by Thom Ross  And it’s the height of hypocrisy to claim Wyatt Earp was not a hero because he was ambitious. That’s the human occupation. It’s the American way and has been from the beginning. And now it’s bad? The Earps certainly believed they were facing fully-armed opponents. Wyatt Earp, Morgan Earp, Virgil Earp and Doc Holliday were brave men who faced outlaws who had repeatedly threatened to kill them, including that very morning.  Doc Holliday So there you go. Let’s destroy one of our founders and an inspiring archetype because superiority feels so good.  Criticizing ones country for genuine and recent sins is a must in a democracy. But undermining its heroes and the people who created the Republic in the first place, by judging them by our light rather than theirs, has been highly destructive. If they were no good, is America any good? What is our bedrock? Destroy a society’s belief in itself and you destroy that society.   Published on November 17, 2016 22:02 • 4 views October 21, 2016  Readers, I recently enjoyed myself for a week reading Hampton Sides’ Blood and Thunder, the story of scout and frontiersman Kit Carson.  But the book is also a tour through America’s Western conquest.  Kit Carson just happened to be the man who made acquiring everything from New Mexico to California possible, thus we get a ringside seat by just following him.   Sides, author of numerous non-fiction histories, made me feel I was there: And it was thrilling.  (By the way, Doubleday is publishing Sides’ new book in 2017. It’s about one of the most harrowing battles in American history, the Battle of Chosin Reservoir, in the Korean War. It’s tentatively titled “Mountains of Fire and Ice.”)  Here’s my interview with him. Kit Carson, by George Stuart.  Robb: As I was reading your book, it seemed to me Kit Carson’s personality was very like the Indians he associated with and fought (and sometimes married); for instance, his beliefs in omens and bad medicine, his refusal to take a second shot if his first missed an animal, his dependence on intuition in sizing up people and situations.  Is this how you see it?  HAMPTON SIDES: Absolutely. Kit Carson spent most of his young adult years living more like a Native American than an Anglo American.  From the Indians he befriended, he developed all sorts of little quirks, protocols, and superstitions, if you want to call it that. Perhaps being illiterate, as he was, forced him to rely more on his hunches and instincts, many of which were honed by his years as a mountain man, living among the tribes. He spoke a half-dozen Indian tongues.   Some of his happiest days were the ones he spent with the Arapaho, his first wife’s tribe.  Arapaho camp, 1880’s.  It’s remarkable that he’s known now, mistakenly, as this great Indian hater. Nothing could be further than the truth.  Robb: Kit Carson also seemed to be an admirable man in the way the Anglo civilization saw admirable: Modest, responsible, abstemious in his habits (he drank very little), a dry sense of humor and a great frontiersman.  You wrote he often saved people’s lives without expecting payment, was truthful and kind. Kit Carson’s hatchet.  Yet, you called Kit Carson a “natural born killer.” You described his temper, his vengefulness (“If you crossed him, he would find you”), the way he described battles as “pretty,” and a preemptive attack on an Indian village as “a perfect butchery.”   Did the place make the man, or did the man find his natural place?  HAMPTON SIDES: Both, I think. The place accentuated the nascent tendencies that were already there in the man. Kit Carson did have this very sweet side to his personality, one that’s hard to reconcile with some of the more violent episodes throughout his career in the West.   From his family in Missouri, and from his Scotch-Irish background, he probably inherited a certain temperament, a zest for the fight, and a penchant for pursuing a grudge.  But then you plunk that personality in the vast uncharted wilderness of the West, a thoroughly violent and unpredictable world without laws, and you have a very explosive character on your hands.  Robb: You wrote that Kit Carson was not an Indian hater, but rather someone who had many Indian friends, befriended Indians, married two Indian women and always killed in what he believed were fair fights. John Charles Fremont  Do you find it ironic that Kit Carson opened the West for settlement through his explorations with John Fremont (“The Pathfinder”), which in turn destroyed the Indians’ way of life? Wasn’t this inevitable? Wouldn’t another scout have done it, if Carson had not been born?  HAMPTON SIDES: It is tremendously ironic, tragically so. The great theme of Carson’s life was that, wittingly or not, he fouled his own nest, he destroyed his own paradise, he set in motion great forces that systematically dismantled the raw wilderness of the West that he knew so well and loved so much.  The Fremont explorations ignited a surge of immigration that, in turn, led to the wholesale devastation of the Native American tribes. Carson wasn’t fully aware of it at the time, but he was at the very center of the movements that destroyed the world he held so dear.  While it’s true that someone else might have done it if Carson hadn’t, it’s especially poignant and rich that it was Carson who became the leading edge, leading Fremont, and effectively the entirety of Anglo-American capitalistic-industrial society, into the Western wilds. Said to be Navaho slaves.  Robb: I appreciated your not making any one people the bad guys. For instance, pointing out that Navahos took Hispanic slaves and the Hispanics took Navaho slaves, telling the reader what the Jicarilla Apaches did to captive Ann White (forcing her to be the band’s prostitute, then murdering her), making it plain that all the peoples fighting against each other took scalps.  Is that how you see it, that all three races (Indian, Hispanic and Anglo) were equally savage?  HAMPTON SIDES: I suppose so. We’re all humans, we all have the same DNA, the same capacity for good and evil. The only real difference was, Anglo Americans had the tools—the social structures, the technological advances, the guns, germs, and steel, as they say—to turn their will into a reality and transform life on a huge scale.  So, in the end, Anglo Americans were more effective in their savagery.  Robb: You have written many vivid scenes in this book, among them the murder of Charles Bent, Kit Carson’s escape at the Battle of Pasqual, the Klamath attack on Carson and the men he was traveling with, the (first) Battle of Adobe Walls, and many more. In writing this book, what historical episodes affected you most? Were you affected? The Day After the Battle of Adobe Walls, watercolor, by an unnamed soldier with Carson’s command. Dated November 26, 1864.  HAMPTON SIDES: You can’t write a history of this period and not be affected. There was so much bloodshed, so much tragedy, so much turmoil. So many forces were colliding: Indians clashing with Mexicans. Mexicans clashing with Americans. Americans clashing with Indians. Americans clashing with fellow Americans (during the Civil War).  The Battle of Pasqual, the inconclusive battle between American forces and combined force of Mexican and loyalist Californio militias and lancers during the formers efforts to capture Los Angeles during Mexican War in December of 1846. This painting depicts the death of Capt. Benjamin Moore. Fort Moore Hill in Los Angeles is names in his honor.  What’s extraordinary is how much of all this Kit Carson witnessed and participated in. Time and time again, he’s right there, in the middle of it, a kind of Zelig figure, bouncing around all over this vast canvas of real estate.  You keep wondering: What’s he doing there? How’d he get there? He always seems to be in the thick of the action. Or if he’s not, he’s only one degree of separation from it.  Of all the episodes of his long and eventful life, I would say his conquest of the Navajo was the most difficult to write about. It’s almost as though everything in his life funneled down to that one conflict and that one place—Canyon de Chelly, in the heart of Navajo country.   Canyon de Chelly  Here a reluctant conqueror flips a switch and brutally brings this proud tribe to its knees. The destruction of those peach trees down in Canyon de Chelly—a militarily small but somehow a devastatingly powerful act—still haunts me.  Robb: I was astonished to read about the Pueblo and Hispanic revolts in Santa Fe and Taos against the American invaders. That was pretty savage. Do the New Mexicans remember these things, or has the memory faded, or even disappeared, with time? Taos Pueblo  HAMPTON SIDES: Oh yes, it’s still very much there, in the cultural memory here, and it’s studied to a certain extent in the schools. New Mexicans, especially those from a Native American or Hispanic background, are very clear on the fact that the United States Army came here and conquered this place by force and then occupied it against the will of the inhabitants.  They’re very clear, also, on the fact that some of those inhabitants actually rose up and tried—however crudely, however savagely—to throw out the hated occupier.   Gen. Wool entering Saltillo with his troops, 1847.  Here in New Mexico there is still hostility, sometimes overt but usually just under the surface, towards the Anglo-American presence. It’s a kind of asterisk attached to life here, that basically says: New Mexico may be part of the US of A, but make no mistake, this place was stolen.  Robb: Who was the next strongest personality in the West of that period, after Kit Carson, and why? Was it the vainglorious John Fremont? Stephen Kearny? The Navajo leader Narbona, or even President James Polk, the man who single-handedly conquered Mexico from his desk in The White House?   Narbona HAMPTON SIDES: That’s a really tough one. There are so many. There are hardly any “weak” characters from this period. Something about the harsh demands of the place and the times made people resilient and strong. That’s one of the reasons, I think, why we’re drawn to stories about the Western frontier. Life was just so hard, so raw, so unforgiving, and so violent that it brought forth unbelievably stark and stout characters. Stephen Kearny  Probably my favorite character in the book, after Carson, is General Kearny. I’m convinced he was one of the most enlightened and most professional officers in the US Army, one of the rare bright lights in the whole story of the “winning” of the West. Kearny was principled, fair-minded, and firm. He carried himself with dignity but was not haughty or arrogant.  In his writings and speeches, you see a certain empathy for Native American culture, and for Spanish-Mexican culture, that sets him apart from most of the racist thinking common in Washington. If we’d had more officers like him, I believe the story of the Western conquest, brutal and brazen as it inevitably was, might have been a lot less tragic and a lot less bloody.   Robb: Carson and Davy Crockett had very similar lives. Both were renowned frontiersmen who became famous through fiction. Davy became famous through a play, and then his death at the Alamo. Kit Carson became famous through “blood and thunder” pulp novels.  I find this amazing. What about you?    HAMPTON SIDES: It is amazing. Carson was perpetually confused and bemused by his own celebrity. He didn’t understand why people back East seemed to need to fashion him into a hyperbolic hero, an action figure hero, a folk hero. He didn’t understand where it came from, why writers were making so much of his real exploits, and then fictionalizing them into even more fabulous tales of derring-do. Kit Carson was the subject of countless newspaper articles, a Broadway play, numerous books. A large steamship and a clipper ship were named after him. In Moby Dick, Melville compared Carson favorably to Hercules.  And then there were all those “blood and thunder” pulp novels. Carson hated them, and spent much of his life fighting the caricatures and unrealistic expectations they raised.  The writers of those lurid tales never sought his permission to use his name, and he never saw a cent from them. He hated those books, also, because (and here’s the ultimate irony) . . . he couldn’t read them.    Carson was illiterate. Published on October 21, 2016 23:35 • 6 views August 29, 2016 Jesse James Rides Again through author Mark Gardner Readers, Mark Gardner wrote this book about Jesse James and his gang, and it’s so fascinating I read it twice. Gardner is a wonderful researcher and writer, and so far has also written about Billy the Kid and Teddy Roosevelt. He’s also a talented musician. So, without further ado.. ROBB: In the book, you made it plain that the James-Younger gang, particularly Jesse, was popular with the public. Jesse James You wrote, “No gang of criminals were more feared, more wanted, more hated and more celebrated.” You also said a newspaper editorialized the gang who robbed the train near the Lamine River as “Cool and courageous” and “dashing knights of the road.”   Why this admiration? Although it’s true the gang were all Confederate ex-partisans, and they knew their enemies in Missouri were going to constantly harass them after the war, didn’t you also say banks were not insured in the 19th century? Weren’t the gang stealing from the people who deposited their money in the banks they robbed? Jesse as a teenager, when he was riding with Bloody Bill Anderson.  GARDNER: Wayman Hogue, who grew up in the Arkansas Ozarks in the 1870s and 80s, wrote in his autobiography, Back Yonder, that the mountain people not only considered Jesse James a hero, but they “held him up before their sons as an example of the ideal man.” Hogue didn’t find this surprising: “It is one of the characteristics of human nature to worship at the shrine of anyone who excels in any line, let it be for good or for evil.” The success of the James-Younger gang, combined with the audaciousness of their robberies, struck awe in many people, including journalists.  Frank James And the fact that the gang pulled off the Rocky Cut robbery (near Otterville, Missouri, July 7, 1876), for example, without anyone being shot or killed, made it seem okay to admire what the outlaws had accomplished. As one newspaper wrote, “No one was hurt, and no one loses anything save the express company.” That last line is important. As long as it was someone else losing their money, it was pretty easy to idolize the “bold outlaws.” The Younger brothers, who rode with Jesse and Frank, left to right, Bob, Jim and Cole, with sister Henrietta.  As for the banks in post-war Missouri, I think you would find that few of those who admired or tolerated the James-Younger gang – ex-Confederates and Southern sympathizers – had money in the banks. A lot of Radical Republicans did, though. ROBB: Did bitterness about the war, and having enemies, really motivate the James-Younger gang? After all, they could have left Missouri, moved to California and started new lives. GARDNER: I think the chance to line their pockets with lots of cash was a pretty strong motivator. But at the same time, there was bitterness and a feeling amongst the gang that they were being persecuted, especially after their run-ins with Allan Pinkerton’s detectives. Jesse and Frank’s eight-year-old half brother was mortally wounded when the Pinkertons conducted a disastrous midnight raid on the family farm in January, 1875; their mother was maimed for life. The Youngers lost a brother in a shootout with Pinkertons in south Missouri a year earlier.  Allan Pinkerton, owner of the detective agency and Jesse’s mortal enemy. I don’t know that we’ll ever know with one hundred percent certainty what motivated these men to live the life of outlaws, but I think it’s safe to say that most of them did it with chips on their shoulders. ROBB: Do you have any estimate of how many banks and trains they robbed in 11 years, from 1866 to 1876, and number of men they killed? GARDNER: Hard to say, because the gang personnel changed over time, and there are some robberies where we suspect it was the handiwork of the James-Younger gang but can’t confirm. For example, the first robbery that, because of the evidence, there is no question that Jesse was a participant was the robbery of the Daviess County Savings Association in Gallatin, Missouri, on December 7, 1869 (and that may have been a planned murder disguised as a robbery). A good website that attempts to tackle the question of who possibly took part in the several robberies associated with the different permutations of the gang is found here: http://www.civilwarstlouis.com/Histor... ROBB: Jesse seems like an interesting person. You described him as always laughing, light hearted and reckless and brave, but egotistical. But why did he constantly write newspapers denying he committed such and such a robbery if he enjoyed being the most wanted man in the U.S.? Was that really his way of bragging the gang did it and taunting the law? Jesse and Frank GARDNER: Certainly Jesse liked the attention, but his published letters were also propaganda. By strongly professing his innocence and ranting against Missouri officials (Republicans) and especially the Pinkertons (based in Chicago), he maintained the sympathies of pro-Southern Missourians. Jesse was also angling for full amnesty, and he came close. An amnesty bill was brought before the Missouri legislature in March of 1874, but was defeated by a small margin. Jesse’s family farm in Missouri. ROBB: Jesse seemed to glory in his notoriety, but what did he think would happen. That he would never be caught? GARDNER: I’m guessing most Wild West outlaws believed they wouldn’t get caught. ROBB: How did they get away with the crimes for 11 years. They seemed to stand out in a crowd. You wrote they had “striking physiques,” they dressed differently than others, pushing their pants inside knee-high boots, wore big spurs, wide-brimmed hats and all of them wore dusters, plus they had strong Missouri twangs.   Northfield, Missouri, Jesse’s downfall. GARDNER: The outlaws did stand out in Minnesota, but the gang always had a plausible explanation for the curious: they were miners on their way to the Black Hills, or cattle drovers. The idea that these unusual-looking men were the notorious James-Younger gang was the farthest from people’s minds.  And it’s important to remember that there were no good photographs of the outlaws available at the time (the gang members’ families made it a point to keep any photos secret). Unless you went to school with Jesse or Frank, you would have no clue as to their real identity. In fact, so unconcerned was the gang about someone identifying them that they rode in a train to Minnesota and freely went about in public once they got there. ROBB: Why was Cole Younger sent to prison for years for his part in the Northfield bank robbery, while Frank James got a pardon; particularly when it was Frank who murdered the heroic Joseph Heywood, the bank accountant who refused to open the vault. Joseph Heywood GARDNER: Actually, Frank was never pardoned. He was subjected to two criminal trials after his surrender to the Missouri governor in 1882 and was acquitted at both. Now, had Frank been extradited to Minnesota and been tried for the murder of Joseph Lee Heywood, he very likely would have been convicted and sentenced to death. However, a key part of the deal for his surrender was a promise from Governor Thomas Crittenden that Frank would not be sent to Minnesota. And, indeed, Minnesota’s governor did send a requisition for Frank in January, 1883, but Crittenden declined to honor it. Cole Younger after being injured in the Northfield, Minnesota raid.  Cole, of course, was captured in Minnesota red handed, so to speak, along with his brothers, Jim and Bob. He and his brothers probably would not have spent so many years in Stillwater, however, if they had identified the two robbers who got away after the Northfield debacle: Frank and Jesse James. The Youngers refused to name names – and they were asked countless times. Cole, the last surviving Younger brother, was released from parole by the Minnesota pardon board in 1903 and allowed to return to Missouri, where he reunited with his old friend Frank James. The two toured together for a few short months as part of The Great Cole Younger and Frank James Historical Wild West. ROBB: Your chapter on the Northfield bank raid was fascinating. It seemed to shock the gang that the Northfield citizens fought back. Now remind me, why did Jesse escape? Everyone else was killed in Northfield or captured after that long chase through the Big Woods, correct?  Interior of the bank in Northfield GARDNER: During their flight across Minnesota, the surviving six members of the gang decided to split up southwest of Mankato. Most of the men had serious wounds to contend with, but Bob’s shattered elbow was extremely painful, and he required frequent rest, which slowed everyone down (they were on foot at this time). Two of the gang killed in the Northfield raid. This photo was taken after death.  So, Frank and Jesse separated from the Youngers and Charlie Pitts. The James boys stole a pair of horses almost immediately afterward and were able keep in horse flesh for the remainder of their escape, thus allowing them to stay ahead of the posses. Had the Youngers and Pitts also been able to acquire some mounts, they might have made it out of Minnesota as well. That didn’t happen. In a shootout with a posse on the Watonwan River near Madelia, Charlie Pitts was killed and the Youngers captured. ROBB:  In the movie about Jesse James, starring Brad Pitt, Jesse gets on a ladder to hang a picture, or something like that, and sees, in the glass, Robert Ford take his gun out, preparing to shoot him in the back. And he lets Ford do it. Robert Ford, the “Dirty little coward.” Although that was just a movie, I wonder if something like that could have happened in real life? Wasn’t Jesse suspicious of Ford? Was Ford Jesse’s way out? GARDNER: The Ford brothers later said that they believed Jesse had become suspicious of them. It would be pure speculation as to what was going through Jesse’s mind before Bob Ford pulled the trigger on his revolver. But we do know that Jesse James had a wife and two children whom he loved. He also appeared to be planning for the future. Just a month before his assassination he had inquired about a 160-acre farm that was for sale in Nebraska. Jesse, after death That doesn’t sound suicidal to me.   Published on August 29, 2016 21:07 • 8 views July 29, 2016 READERS, Many of you know historian and author Paul Andrew Hutton from his recent book, The Apache Wars: The Hunt for Geronimo, the Apache Kid, and the Captive Boy Who Started the Longest War in American History. You can find my interview with him, about that book, on this website.  http://juliarobb.com/blog/from-cochis... But Hutton also wrote Phil Sheridan and His Army, (a Spur Award winner) and that’s what this interview is about. Gen. Sheridan was one of the Union’s most important heroes during the Civil War, and, from 1867 to 1883, served as commander for the Department of the Missouri, the jurisdiction of which stretched from the Missouri River to the Rocky Mountains and from Mexico to Canada.  Sheridan, middle, at West Point The Northern Plains were included in his command. This, in turn, meant he was also the commander in charge of most of the Western Indian wars.  It’s not possible to discuss America’s Indian Wars unless we also discuss Sheridan.  Sheridan Robb-Welcome Paul Hutton. You wrote that Sheridan was intellectually limited. What did you mean by that? Would you use as an example Sheridan’s failure to realize the difference between the Northwestern Indians and the Great Plains’ tribes in terms of what it would take to pacify them? Wasn’t that just a learning curve? The general on his horse. Statue located at Sheridan Circle, Washington, D.C.  HUTTON–Sheridan was not a cerebral man—he was a man of action. While a brilliant tactical combat officer he had neither the patience nor the intellectual capacity necessary to comprehend the task of dealing with the wide variety of native peoples in the West. Of course General Sherman, who was clearly an intellectual giant, dealt with the Indians in much the same way.  Gen. Sherman The bottom line was that they had a job to do—dispose of the natives and open the West to white settlement as quickly as possible. Sheridan did that job and did not lose any sleep over its morality. Robb-Although, overall, Sheridan seems to have been an admirable general, you fault him for many things, among them not supporting Custer in his “courageous act” of testifying against corrupt Secretary of War William Belknap. Belknap  HUTTON-The problem for Sheridan in the West was the dual issues of administration and Indian policy. He pretended that he could not influence policy—that all he could do was fight—when in reality he had enormous influence. His knee-jerk defense of atrocities—such as Camp Grant and the Marias Massacre—undercut his position in the East. He preferred to pretend that this was not a political problem when in reality it totally was. Robb-Sheridan seemed almost a physically challenged person, as if he had been born with birth defects; the long upper body and extra-long arms joined with super-short legs. Has medical science ever guessed what was wrong with his skull, regarding the two large bumps? HUTTON—Sheridan was indeed oddly shaped, which may well have added to his pugnacious nature. He looked grand on horseback and was a marvel on the battlefield. The years were not kind to him as he quickly gained weight after the war. He also suffered from heart disease (undetected at the time) which carried him off prematurely. Robb-After reading your book, it appears neither the whites or tribes had any idea what the other side meant when they were supposedly communicating. For instance, the Cheyenne failed to understand they were signing a treaty giving up a good portion of their land, as they did at Medicine Lodge in 1867.   Paper that talks two ways, by Howard Terpning. HUTTON—Actually, neither the Indians nor the government understood how quickly the West would be settled. The railroad changed everything. Settlement that had taken 200 years to reach the Missouri River now swept over the rest of the continent in 25 years. It was all over in a generation. Geronimo’s 1886 surrender ended nearly 400 years of the European struggle to conquer the North American continent. Robb-The general (uninformed) public believes Custer was ruthless, yet of the two, Sheridan seems much more punitive toward the tribes than Custer. Custer HUTTON—The public perception of Custer is ludicrous. He was a lieutenant colonel of cavalry and yet popular culture has made him the central character and grand villain of the Indian Wars. He was once famous as a martyr to Manifest Destiny so it was only natural that he should become the villain of the story once societal attitudes changed in the 1970s.  Sheridan was, of course, far more brutal toward the Indians. He meant what he said with, “the only good Indian is a dead Indian.” Robb-Sheridan seemed to have mixed feelings about Custer, admiring his contributions in the Civil War so much he gave Elizabeth Custer the table on which Robert E. Lee signed the surrender.  Sheridan is standing with the Union officers, far left. Yet Sheridan said Custer was as “boyish as be was brave” and (was) “always needing someone to restrain him.. too impetuous; without deliberation; he thought of himself invincible and having a charmed life.” HUTTON—Custer was Sheridan’s pet officer. He won that position by boldness and success during the Civil War. Custer was the premier combat officer for the Union’s premier combat officer. They were a mutual admiration society. Sheridan, however, had no illusions about war—it was a dirty business—while Custer wallowed in the romance and glory of war. That endeared Custer all the more to Sheridan. Still, when Custer attacked Grant’s administration in 1876 he lost Sheridan’s support. Sheridan was devoted to Grant. It was Sherman who got Custer restored to command of the 7th.  Grant, at Cold Harbor Nevertheless, Sheridan wanted Custer in the field, because Custer was the best the army had. Sheridan was devastated by Custer’s death.  Robb-Didn’t you note that the only successful tactics ever used against the northern tribes were the ones Sheridan dreamed up; winter campaigns and destroying the tribes stores and horses? HUTTON—Sheridan employed the same total war tactics against the natives that he had used so successfully against the rebels in the Shenandoah. He destroyed their means of sustenance-the buffalo-and attacked them in their winter camps. The attacks on villages were a step beyond the Civil War because the Indians were viewed as a savage inferior race.  Battle of the Washita Although there were civilian casualties in the Civil War they were either incidental or accidental, but the Indian campaigns targeted noncombatants much like the bombing raids of World War II. Clara Blinn, white captive killed by Indians, with her son Willie, at the Battle of the Washita. Robb-Was Sheridan the best general for the times? HUTTON—Sheridan was in many ways the perfect general for his times. His pragmatism and elastic ethics made him a good fit for the unpleasant task of crushing the resistant natives. He was determined to destroy the enemies of Union—be they rebels, striking workers, or western Indians. And he was a success at this task, like it or not.  Capt. John Bourke Robb-It surprises me the Sheridan assigned Capt. John Bourke (one of my favorite historical characters) and Capt. William Clark to study and publish information about the tribes and their cultures. What does this say about Sheridan? HUTTON-He also was sensitive enough to recognize that something important was being lost and so he sponsored the work of Bourke and Clark. He also sponsored Capt. Pratt’s experiment in Indian education. Sheridan was a complicated man, and I hope that my biography of him captured that. Robb-In your book, as well as many others about the Indian Wars, you draw up a strong case that many of the problems between the Army and the tribes stemmed from Congressional inaction and delay. For instance, the failure to allocate money for the tribes (for a year) following the Treaty of Medicine Lodge. HUTTON—The level of inaction, corruption, and general stupidity on the part of the US Congress regarding the Indians is simply mind-boggling. Congress in session, 19th century The politicians made the mess that the soldiers then had to clean up. Then Congressional leaders condemned the army for doing its job. Nothing has changed. General Sherman once declared that “Congress should be impeached!” Robb-As Robert Utley noted, the frontier army is accused of many things, among them wantonly slaughtering women and children. What do you think of the frontier army in terms of honor and effectiveness? HUTTON-These were Victorian gentlemen with a high sense of honor. The slaughter of women and children was not condoned, but race nevertheless played a role in their approach to war. These officers never would have galloped into a rebel town at dawn shooting down anyone who moved, yet they did that to Indian villages. They also took Indians as mistresses–certainly Custer did after the Washita. So race played a key role in tempering their high moral code of conduct, just as it did with British soldiers on colonial duty in the same period.   Published on July 29, 2016 16:35 • 11 views June 30, 2016 Wounded Knee was a Battle Not a Massacre–Sam Russell Interview  Readers, for many years, historians and authors have charged that the incident at Wounded Knee was a massacre, that American soldiers shot down helpless Sioux Indians on the Pine Ridge reservation in South Dakota, the victims of which included many women and children. Col. Sam Russell (currently assigned to the U.S. Army Peacekeeping and Stability Operations Institute at Carlisle Barracks, PA), however, has proven previous accusations wrong with a book which compiles news stories (including eye-witness accounts) about the situation on the reservation. The stories begin a few months prior to Dec. 29, 1890, when the battle occurred, to a few months following. The news stories were written by Charles H. (Will) Cressey for The Omaha Bee.  Cressey was a witness to the battle,   as were two other journalists, who reported the same facts. The book is titled  Sting of the Bee: A Day-By-Day Account of Wounded Knee And The Sioux Outbreak of 1890–1891 as Recorded in The Omaha Bee. Father Francis Craft, a part-Mohawk Catholic priest, was also a witness, and Fr. Craft verified what Cressey and other reporters wrote. Full disclosure, Sam has included a thank you to me in his introduction just because I read his manuscript and had a few editing suggestions. He didn’t need to thank me. He did a fine job with this badly-needed corrective. Sam, Omaha Bee reporter Will Cressey wrote the dispatches you quote in your book (and did an admirable job), and was present at the battle. He reported Wounded Knee as a battle in which the Sioux shot first. Burying Sioux bodies Cressey wrote the Seventh Cavalry soldiers were disarming the Indians and surrounded them while others searched their tepees for weapons. “About a dozen of the warrior had been searched when, like flash, all the rest of them jerked guns from under their blankets and began pouring bullets into the ranks of the soldiers who, a few minutes before, had moved up within almost gun length. “Those Indians who had no guns rushed on the soldiers with tomahawk in one hand and scalping knife in  the other…”  Burial party, Wounded Knee Cressey wrote he was standing behind the Indians, close enough to touch them and the Indians “must have fired a hundred shots before the soldiers fired one.” The Indians subsequently got away to the hills where the battle continued. Unfortunately, when the Indians first fired, the bullets which failed to initially find a target passed the soldiers and hit the Sioux women who were standing behind the soldiers. Robb: What did the other two reporters who witnessed the battle write about it? Brothers, (left to right) White Lance, Joseph Horn Cloud, and Dewey Beard, Wounded Knee warriors; Miniconjou Lakota Russell: The three reporters that were present at Wounded Knee when hostilities broke out were Will Cressey of the Omaha Bee, Charles Allen of the Chadron Democrat, and William Kelley of the Nebraska State Journal, all were correspondents from Nebraska. Not surprisingly, their sympathies were aligned with the settlers and residents of that state, and their three accounts were not all that different. Kelley’s portfolio of articles was published in 1971, Pine Ridge 1890, and Allen wrote an autobiography that was published in 1997, From Fort Laramie to Wounded Knee, which included his article describing the battle. There was a fourth reporter, Thomas Tibbles of the Omaha World Herald, who was at Wounded Knee the morning of the battle, but he departed early and wrote that he could hear the gunfire and cannons on his trip back to the Pine Ridge Agency. Tibbles was married to an Omaha Indian, Bright Eyes, and the two of them offered the closest thing to a Native American account of the events surrounding the outbreak. After the initial melee around the council circle concluded and the fight moved toward the ravines, Cressey, Kelley, and Allen retired to the shelter of Louis Mousseau’s trading post at the Wounded Knee Creek crossing adjacent to the cavalry camp and began writing their articles. January 1891, Albumen Cabinet Card Photograph of a small log cabin behind the Post Office at the Pine Ridge Agency in South Dakota – the location from which the first news reports about Wounded Knee were written. In this photo we see U.S. Marshall George Bartlett, writer / archeologist / anthropologist, Warren King Moorhead, an Indian Police sentry in full uniform and a third, unidentified white man believed to be Louis Mousseau who lived in the cabin and ran the Post Office / Store. They had little time to write and still get their dispatches transported to a telegraph operator and submitted in time to make the evening editions. Unfortunately, that meant that none of the reporters witnessed that portion of the fight that included pursuing Indians up the ravines and into the hills. Kelley, who won the honor by lottery of having his dispatch transmitted over the wires first, wrote, “All of a sudden they [the Indians] threw their hands to the ground and began firing rapidly at the troops, not twenty feet away. The troops were at a great disadvantage, fearing the shooting of their own comrades.” Said to be survivors of Big Foot’s band  As Kelley recorded his perspective of the fight, the sounds of skirmishing rang out in the distance. He went on to write, “To say that it was a most daring feat, 120 Indians attacking 500 cavalry, expresses the situation but faintly. It could only have been insanity which prompted such a deed.” Gen. Nelson Miles Kelley concluded his article with, “Before the night I doubt if either a buck or squaw out of all Big Foot’s band will be left to tell the tale of this day’s treachery. The members of the Seventh Cavalry have once more shown themselves to be heroes in deeds of daring.” Allen’s article was less opinionated than that of Cressey and Kelley. Describing the opening of the battle, Allen wrote, “They [the soldiers] had proceeded to disarm but some eight or ten of these [Indians], when the brave who had been inciting them jumped up and said something and fired at the soldier who was standing guard over the arms that had been secured. The first gun had no sooner been fired than it was followed by hundreds of others and the battle was on.” Robb: Cressey reported many Sioux women attacked soldiers at the battle and the soldiers were forced to shoot them. Was Cressey correct? Russell: There certainly were a number of firsthand accounts that detail Lakota woman and teenage boys arming themselves and fighting back against the soldiers. Once the first shots rang out, the struggle was fight or flight, with examples of Indian men, women, and children doing both.  Some White accounts show that the soldiers were conflicted as to whether they should or could fire on women and children who had chosen to arm themselves and fight.  Second Lieutenant Thomas Q. Donaldson, Jr., C Troop, 7th Cavalry, present at Wounded Knee Second Lieutenant Tommy Tompkins detailed one such incident in his testimony at General Miles’s investigation of Wounded Knee. “One of these mounted squaws was armed and fired on our line, and one of the men said then ‘There is a buck.’ And I said ‘No, it is a squaw, don’t shoot on her,’ and he said ‘Well, by God, Lieut., she is shooting at us.’ He did not fire at her.” Robb: I was for many years a reporter and believe Cressey did an excellent job. Do you agree? Russell: Given the period in which Cressey reported, and the newspaper for which he wrote, I believe he did an outstanding job. Certainly his employer believed he did. He attempted to verify the myriad rumors that swirled around the agency, but, failing that verification, he still willing reported such rumors. He interviewed all comers, including Indians, particularly if they were considered hostile, and he at least presented their own words, even if it was through the lens of his own world view. That being said, Cressey’s bias is glaringly apparent. To be fair, one can see such bias in news reporting today.  One certainly would expect to see a very different perspective from The New York Times versus the Wall Street Journal, or Fox News versus MSNBC.  Ghost dance Moreover, one would not expect to see an Iraqi or Syrian perspective regarding the conflict in Southwest Asia from an American news outlet. Certainly, if there were a Lakota newspaper reporting from Pine Ridge, the accounts would be far different than those of Cressey and his peers. Still, I believe his reports are relevant, and an important historical record, as they provide the context in which Nebraskans viewed the outbreak of 1890-1891. Robb: What happened to Father Craft, who also witnessed Wounded Knee? Russell: Father Francis M. Craft was a very interesting witness, in that he was unfamiliar with the soldiers at Wounded Knee, albeit he was a strong advocate of the Army.  Father Craft Many contemporary historians write off all of the testimony that 7th Cavalry and 1st Artillery officers provided with the guise that they were lying to cover up their dastardly deeds and protect their inept commander. I find this astounding, as the documentation for Wounded Knee is substantial, taken under oath, provided within days of the battle, but largely ignored by present historians. Father Craft’s empathy lay entirely with the Lakota, to the point of directing that his body be buried with the Indians in the trench at Wounded Knee if he died of his wounds. He was part Indian; his great-grandfather was a Mohawk. (Fr. Craft) vociferously blamed the Indian Bureau for all the ills the Lakota suffered, and early on recognized those ills–abject poverty, misery, and starvation–as the root cause of all the turbulence in Nov. and Dec. 1890. Craft was at Wounded Knee to serve as an interpreter, as a friendly face known to the Lakota through his last ten years of missionary work, and to convince the warriors that they would be well cared for if only they peacefully surrendered their weapons. He was positioned between the warriors and the cavalry at the opening volley. He was, according one of his later accounts, shot by soldiers and stabbed by a Brule. Ghost dancers Yet from his perspective on the battlefield, Fr. Craft faulted the Lakota for initiating the hostilities, for continuing to resist, for indiscriminately firing on their own village situated directly behind a troop of cavalry, and lauded the actions of the cavalry in trying to spare the lives of women and children, to the point of taking greater casualties themselves than if they had just wantonly and mercilessly shot down all of the Indians. Fr. Craft, who was not afraid to rattle cages and was very vocal on what he believed to be the truth, provided a deposition that corroborated the soldiers’ accounts of Wounded Knee. Moreover, he was recovering from his wounds in the Catholic Church, not the army field hospital, so was not privy to the post-battle banter and collaboration, so to speak, that occurred among the soldiers prior to giving testimony. He provided a similar account to Eli Ricker, but the judge seemed to not pay much heed to Fr. Craft’s version of events. In addition to his sworn deposition, Fr. Craft gave a lengthy description of Wounded Knee in Feb. 1892 that is recorded in At Standing Rock and Wounded Knee, by Thomas Foley.  Foley has produced two good reads on Fr. Craft. A Quote from Foley in his closing paragraphs I think is on the mark, “Proponents who would enshrine Wounded Knee as the iconic epitome of Native American victimization diminish the heroic stand taken by Big Foot’s warriors.” (Foley, 318) Dewey Beard’s account of his exploits at Wounded Knee are singularly impressive and unquestionably heroic… and account, in part, for why the 7th Cav. continued the battle up the ravines, to suppress such fierce resistance. Fr. Craft recovered from his wounds, and continued his work among the Lakota. He was an energetic and visionary man, whose efforts were thwarted at every turn, even by his own Church. He was too vocal and created some very powerful and politically connected enemies along the way. Perhaps his efforts would have blossomed if he had allied himself with St. Katherine Drexel. ghost dance Ultimately, his twenty years of work among the Lakota bore little fruit, and he settled into a small parish in Pennsylvania until his death in 1920. Robb: Cressey was clear the Indians were starving and plainly stated the shortage of rations caused the uprising on the reservation. Why did that situation exist and was it remedied? Russell: There were a number of factors that caused the dire circumstances at the agencies. Drought had wreaked havoc on crops in the Midwest in 1889 and 1890. The reservation lands were not suitable for substantial farming, and even the favorable farming lands in Nebraska and South Dakota were greatly affected by the drought conditions. Congress decided to wean the Lakota off government rations by cutting back on their annual allotment with the expectation that the Indians would become self-sustaining only if pushed in that direction.  The government purchased the designated allotment of beef on the hoof by the pound, but by the time the cattle were issued to the Indians, each steer had lost from 20% to 40% of its body mass, leaving the Lakota to deal with the shortage. The Indian Bureau believed the reported numbers of Indians on the reservations were inflated, and conducted a census in 1890. This census reduced the population count, and thus reduced the allocation of rations. A measles epidemic swept through the reservations in the summer of 1890 with a high mortality rate, which likely was exasperated by the poor quality and scant quantity of the government rations. While the Ghost Dance was not meant as a protest per say, the wide media coverage that it garnered brought the plight of the Lakota to the attention of Congress and the American people. In that context, the Ghost Dance did have a positive impact on the Lakota, as the government took steps in late Wounded knee dead November and December 1890 to correct the poor rations. The Indian Bureau’s efforts to remedy the situation—only after pressure from the Army and negative publicity in the media—were complicated when the “hostile” bands scattered over 3,000 head of cattle from the government herd at Pine Ridge. The steers that these bands were able to rustle sustained them in their stronghold in the Badlands, which inflamed the crisis and allowed it to continue through December and into January. Robb: I assume the Army could have brought overwhelming force against the Sioux, but chose not to. Why not? Russell: President Harrison’s instructions to the War Department and General Miles was to protect the agencies and resolve the crisis without bloodshed, if possible.  Said to be Ghost Dance shirt General Brooke arrived at Pine Ridge at the end of November with a small contingent of forces expressly to protect the Pine Ridge and Rosebud Agencies. As more forces arrived, like the 6th Cavalry Regiment from Arizona and New Mexico, 7th Cavalry Regiment from Kansas, and 1st Infantry Regiment from California, Brooke had the ability to assume the offensive, which he at times seemed almost desperate to do. He had even issued orders and had all forces (over 27 troops of cavalry a battery of artillery and 100 Indian scouts) in readiness to move on the Indians in the Stronghold of the Badlands. General Miles delayed the order to move when Sitting Bull was killed precipitating many of his Hunkpapa followers to scatter toward the Cheyenne River. Miles was concerned that, if attacked, the Indians would break out of the reservations and kill settlers. He focused most of his attention on the Sitting Bull remnants and Big Foot’s band precisely because they fled from their reservations. His correspondence with Brooke shows him restraining his subordinate from assuming the offensive. The Hotchkiss Gun fired into the Sioux camp at Wounded Knee Creek As long as the Indians were not attacking settlers, General Miles was content to wait them out and cajole their leaders to return to the agencies. He hoped winter would set in and force the Indians to return. Ultimately, General Miles’s patience paid off, and his strategy to encircle the Indians that refused to return to the agencies and slowly constrict his lines succeeded in bringing all the tribes back to the Pine Ridge Agency. Following Wounded Knee, General Miles eventually resolved the outbreak without further bloody engagements, excepting White Clay Creek the following day, due largely to a hard lesson learned, by both Lakota and soldier alike, at Wounded Knee: that to force the Indians to relinquish their arms would result in conflict. General Miles came up with the solution that ultimately worked, only after he had seen the result of Wounded Knee, namely, to have the Indian chiefs collect the firearms and surrender them, and to look the other way when they knowingly relinquished only a token few weapons.  War dance, 1890 Unfortunately, for all concerned, that lesson had yet to be learned on December 29, 1890. Robb: What happened to the two Sioux babies adopted by whites, one by an army officer? Russell: One of the infants died within days of being found on the battleground. The other infant was indeed adopted. The child was christened Zintkala Nuni, or Lost Bird. Her adopted mother, Clara Bewick Colby, was a 44-year-old suffragist and wife of Brig. Gen. Leonard W. Colby, commander of the Nebraska National Guard. The Colbys were residents of Beatrice, Neb., and Mrs. Colby became the unwitting, albeit caring and affectionate, mother of an adopted Lakota infant found on the battleground of Wounded Knee when her husband secured the child during the campaign and brought home his small curio for his wife to raise. Unfortunately for Lost Bird, the Colbys separated and eventually divorced. Mrs. Colby struggled with poverty and raised her adopted daughter as best she could within her limited means. Lost Bird, as a teenager, miscarried a child—rumored to be Gen. Colby’s. She went on to perform on Vaudeville and married her co-star. Lost Bird died of syphilis at the age of 29. She struggled during her short life with her identity and was rejected by both White and Indian cultures. In 1991, her remains were repatriated from California to the Pine Ridge Reservation at the Wounded Knee Memorial where she was buried next to the mass grave of her kinsmen that fell at Wounded Knee a century earlier. Lost Bird as an adult Renee Flood wrote a well-researched book, Lost Bird of Wounded Knee, detailing the lives of the Colbys and Zintkala Nuni. Robb: Was there more than one Sioux Ghost Dance belief? Some seemed to expect Jesus Christ to appear again and restore them to a pristine wilderness. Russell: It took months, if not years, for the government to determine exactly what the Ghost Dance really was, how it started, and how it spread so rapidly and expansively among almost every tribe of the Midwest. James Mooney’s anthropologic work for the Smithsonian was the first real in-depth study of this phenomenon, and really was the first historical look at the root causes of Wounded Knee from an Indian perspective. There were similar instances during the nineteenth century of Native tribes that adopted a messianic religion with similar overtones, e.g. resurrection of dead warriors and family members, return of buffalo and other wild game, removal of Whites, resistance to Americanization, etc.  Hope Springs Eternal, by Howard Terpning I included one article that touched on this topic detailing Smohalla of the Wanapams. There were several other articles printed in the Omaha Bee during that winter that delved into cases of messianic religions among American Indians. It was certainly an aspect of the 1890 outbreak that interested the readers of the Bee. Robb: What happened to the white man who claimed to be the Christ the Indians were waiting for? Russell: Albert C. Hopkins was one of the stranger characters of that winter’s outbreak, and served almost as comic relief for what was otherwise a very serious, and ultimately, deadly series of events. Officers serving at Pine Ridge reservation Cressey described Hopkins as a “little daft,” which was an apt characterization. Hopkins was the founder and president of the Pansy Society of America. He lobbied Congress to recognize the pansy as the national flower, and even received support to redesign the U.S. Flag by arranging the white stars into the shape of a Pansy. The design appeared in several papers, but ultimately the Congressman who introduced the bill also realized that Hopkins was a “little daft” and dropped support for the bill after being ridiculed in the press. Hopkins died in 1904 in Canton, S.D. His death announcement was titled “’Pansy’ Hopkins Dead” and explained that, “His mind has not been right for some years.” Hopkins was a Union veteran and served in the 11th Wisconsin Infantry Regiment during the Civil War. Sam Russell Teddy and his Rough Riders: Yes they did take San Juan Hill   Readers, Mark Lee Gardner has written a fascinating book about Teddy Roosevelt and his Rough Riders, names everyone knows, but no one knows much about. Here’s the first interesting fact. Although some writers have claimed Teddy did not storm San Juan Hill, or Heights, in fact he and his men did that very thing. With the declaration of war with Spain in April 1898, Theodore Roosevelt conceived the idea of raising a cavalry regiment recruited from Western businessmen, cowboys and outdoorsmen. Roosevelt then inspired men to join the 1st U.S. Volunteer Cavalry, better known as the “Rough Riders.”   Roosevelt, a former New York National Guardsman, helped to organize the regiment and was appointed its lieutenant colonel. After training in Texas and Florida, the Rough Riders landed in Cuba, without their horses.  It was during the Battle of San Juan Hill, on July 1, 1898, that the Rough Riders, under Roosevelt, made their mark in American military history. Teddy and some of his Rough Riders Ordered to seize Kettle Hill in support of the main attack, the Rough Riders fought their way to the top despite heavy enemy fire. After taking the hill, the Rough Riders continued their attack, seizing San Juan Heights, which overlooked the city of Santiago. The American victory led to the Spanish surrender two weeks later. Here’s the interview. ROBB: The thing that first impressed me about the Rough Riders was their innocence, their naivety, their eagerness to fight in a war in which they could be killed. It seems the national nightmare, the Civil War, would have made them somewhat wary. Did you get the same impression while researching? GARDNER: The young men who enlisted in the Rough Riders were definitely naïve. They had grown up with the stories of the great Civil War (several were sons of Civil War veterans), and they longed for their own war and their own chance to win laurels on a battlefield. But as one Rough Rider wrote later, “To those who never soldiered in war times there is a halo that is inviting, but to those who have, there is no halo. It only comes with the years afterward when all things are softened as into a dream.” ROBB: I compare the Rough Riders to soldiers today and they do not seem to be the same kind of people. Roosevelt’s men were like men playing on a college football team while the soldiers today are seemingly aware of the horrors of war; they seem more sophisticated. GARDNER: Television, beginning with the coverage of the Vietnam War, and, in more recent years, the Internet, have made us aware, and in the most graphic ways possible, of the true horrors of combat. So, yes, it’s not surprising that the soldiers of today are savvier about what they are getting into than the volunteers of 118 years ago. However, the fighting in Cuba was no sporting event, and the Rough Riders were as brave and steady as any soldiers on a battlefield before or after. ROBB: I got the same impression about American culture in the Spanish-American War era; it was cohesive, innocent and shallow. For instance, nobody seemed to ask why Cuba was our war. That’s not how it is today. GARDNER: I didn’t delve deeply into the politics of the Spanish-American War in my book simply because there are plenty of volumes out there that treat that subject. My aim was to tell the story of this legendary volunteer regiment and its charismatic leader through the eyes of the participants. There were many in the United States who questioned the war, but there were many more who supported it. The cause of Cuba Libre found much sympathy with Americans, who easily recalled the history of their own struggle for independence. It was the sinking of the USS Maine in February of 1898, however, that most shaped popular support for war against Spain. ROBB: Who sank the Maine? Did the Spaniards sink the ship or ?????  GARDNER: The exact cause of the explosion of the Maine is still debated. I think most historians believe the powder magazine of the ship ignited accidentally. However, the U.S. Navy assembled a board of inquiry to determine the cause, and it concluded that the Maine “was destroyed by the explosion of a submarine mine.” The vast majority of Americans accepted this report and pointed their fingers at Spain as the perpetrator. ROBB: Did you find it ironic that the Rough Riders seemed to disdain the Cuban rebels, yet were in Cuba to ostensibly help them defeat the Spanish? GARDNER: Most Rough Riders, including Roosevelt, were disappointed in what they saw of the Cuban insurrectos. Their clothing was in tatters, and their arms varied greatly in quality. It didn’t help that the Cubans failed to come through with the promised support in the subsequent fighting. At least one Rough Rider, though, recognized what the Cubans had been up against, writing that “after all, they kept three hundred thousand Spaniards guessing for three years – no slight achievement.”   ROBB: The 10th cavalry (African-Americans) seemed to fight well, yet I never heard anything about their assistance in fighting the Spanish. GARDNER: There were four regiments of Buffalo Soldiers, two of cavalry and two of infantry, in Cuba, and each of those regiments displayed real fighting spirit during the campaign. The Spaniards called these black soldiers Yankees ahumados: smoked Yankees. They may not have gotten much press in the States, but they certainly impressed the Rough Riders who fought alongside them. “I tell you,” wrote one Rough Rider in a letter home, “the black boys set a pace that is damn hard to keep up with, for they fight like demons and never know when to stop.” ROBB: I got the impression that Roosevelt and other officers just marched into fights and there was little planning or tactics, or strategy, involved. Is that true? GARDNER: There was little strategic planning or direction. The commanding American general in Cuba, William Shafter, weighed more than three hundred pounds and suffered from gout.  (Shafter) was sick in his tent for the Battle of San Juan Heights of July 1, 1898, and communications between his headquarters and the battlefield took far too long, forcing subordinates to issue orders on their own initiative. As Roosevelt wrote later, the battle was “essentially a troop commanders’, indeed, almost a squad leaders’, fight.” ROBB: Did having so many upper crust soldiers, Harvard men, etc. make a difference in what happened in Cuba? GARDNER: The millionaires and Ivy Leaguers, for the most part, pulled their own weight in the regiment. The only real difference came from some of these men and their families donating money and supplies for the entire outfit. Woodbury Kane, a wealthy New Yorker, had his sister send to Cuba six hundred tins of premium Golden Sceptre tobacco and several cases of canned peaches for the troopers. He instantly became, as one Rough Rider wrote, “the most popular man in camp.” ROBB: Teddy Roosevelt was an unusual person, wasn’t he? It seems hard to compare him to anyone else in American history. GARDNER: No American, living or dead, can compare to Theodore Roosevelt. He is endlessly fascinating. One Rough Rider commented to his mother that Roosevelt was “the most magnetic man I ever saw.” He inspired his men to no end, and they would literally follow him anywhere. ROBB: Would Teddy have been elected president if he hadn’t organized and ridden up San Juan Hill with the Rough Riders?  GARDNER: Well, TR ran up San Juan Hill, his horse, Little Texas, having been left behind at a barbed wire fence. But to answer your question, he may still have become president, but I don’t think it would have happened nearly as quickly. His heroics in Cuba (he was nominated for the Medal of Honor by all his commanding officers) put him in the national spotlight. This led directly to his being elected governor of New York in November, 1898, which was followed two years later with his spot on the Republican ticket in 1900 as vice president under McKinley.  ROBB: The Rough Riders also seemed different from other men you’ve written about. For instance, the men who fought in the Lincoln County War, and the James Gang and the lawmen who hunted them. What do you think about that? GARDNER: There were actually a few wanted men, and even a couple of murderers, in the Rough Riders. But you’re right, most were not anything like the outlaws I have written about in the past. Billy the Kid and Jesse James were charismatic, and they seem to have been natural-born leaders, but Roosevelt was both charismatic and a genius to boot. I think Jesse and Billy would have been drawn to TR, but not vice versa.  Frank James actually volunteered to serve as a personal bodyguard to Roosevelt after an assassination attempt on the former president during his Bull Moose campaign of 1912. Gardner   From Cochise to Geronimo, Paul Hutton narrates The Apache Wars In The Apache Wars, Paul Hutton takes us from 1861, when a bungling Army lieutenant began the war by attempting to take Cochise captive, to exchange him for 12-year-old Felix Ward (later Mickey Free), until the late 1880’s, when Geronimo surrendered for the last time. It’s a remarkable, enthralling narrative history, and Hutton is going to tell us about it, right now. ROBB: Was the American military effort against Apaches greatly hampered by men who knew nothing about Apaches? For instance, Lt. Bascom’s mistaken efforts to capture Cochise? HUTTON: The Bascom affair at Apache Pass is but one of many bungling acts by young army officers during the Indian wars. Two other examples are Lt. John Lawrence Grattan (probably responsible for the Grattan massacre during the first Sioux war) and Capt. William J. Fetterman (who led his men into an ambush during Red Cloud’s War on December 21, 1866) on the northern Plains.  George Bascom The nature of the military at the time meant that few experienced officers remained in station for very long. Some of these officers—like Ewell, Randall, and Emmet Crawford—were excellent. The same was true for civilian Indian agents. As soon as they finally began to understand Apache culture they were removed by a new political administration. Of course many of the civilian agents were also corrupt and were bilking both the Apaches and the government. Men like Tom Jeffords, (friend to Cochise and peace negotiator) John Clum (Indian agent) and Kit Carson (army scout) were rigidly honest, but they were unfortunately but rare exceptions to the crooked dealings that so marked the Indian Bureau during the Gilded Age.  ROBB: Do you believe Apache leaders Mangas, Cochise and Victorio really appeared to their people after death?  Victorio HUTTON: In my book I attempted to establish a tone of respect for cultural belief systems. I do not know with any certainty if Lozen, Geronimo, or the Dreamer had mystical power, but I certainly do know that many Apaches believed that they did. I respect those beliefs, and they help explain the actions of the Apaches.  ROBB:  I’ve wondered if the American army could have won the Apache wars without Apache scouts. What do you think?  Geronimo HUTTON: General George Crook’s adoption of the Apache scout program was essential to the American army’s success against the Apaches. This was made possible by the lack of any sense of Apache tribal unity. The eventual betrayal of the Apache scouts by the U.S. government was a terrible wrong. It was, however, the 1886 final removal of the Chiricahua and Warm Springs people from Arizona to Florida that finally broke Geronimo’s ability to resist the “White Eyes.” ROBB: Why did these Apaches agree to work against their own people? Did members of one band sometimes work against their own people (for instance, White Mountain against White Mountain) or just against other bands (White Mountain against Chiricahuas, for instance).  Mickey Free with his two wives  HUTTON: Certainly White Mountain Apaches scouted against Chiricahuas without the slightest compunction. There was no sense of tribal unity, and in fact there were many old scores to settle. When the government attempted to settle many separate Apache bands at San Carlos Reservation it caused great trouble—there were old feuds. Apaches had a great sense of honor and carried grudges for a long time. These were Hatfield/McCoy type grudges. Blood feuds were a great problem on the reservations. When members of the same band scouted against each other it became much more problematical. This is where government scouts like Mickey Free, Tom Horn, and Al Sieber proved invaluable. Many army officers suspected the Apache scouts of assisting their band members and they were correct in this—although not always, for honor often trumped even family with the scouts. General Phil Sheridan, however, never trusted the scouts and this finally led him to sack General Crook from his Arizona command.  Gen. George Crook ROBB: I was shocked when I read the American government even sent the faithful Apache scouts to Florida. That’s right, isn’t it? How do you feel about that? HUTTON: I was horrified by this act of unfathomable deceit. I never had much respect for Grover Cleveland, but this was really the nail in the coffin of my disdain for him. To meet with these people, shake their hands, smile at them and give them peace medals—and then secretly order them imprisoned. Incredible. ROBB: I’ve read other accounts of Gen. Crook, but yours was more personal and realistic. I think of the time the Apaches and the Mexican families were fighting over the captive children (whether the foster parents would be able to keep them or if the kids would be returned to their own people), and the children were hysterical. Crook left because he said he couldn’t stand to hear more. Was Crook a more sensitive person than he seemed? HUTTON: Well, I’m pretty rough on Crook—certainly he was a somewhat compassionate man, but I think his reaction at the conference had more to do with his contempt for Gen. Otis Howard than any feelings he had for the Apache children.  ROBB: Why was Crook upset when Lt. Royal Whitman stopped the Tucson posse, which was determined to attack the Apaches?  Royal Whitman HUTTON: Whitman’s action was a major breach of the delicate division between military and civilian authority. Unless you have declared martial law you can’t interfere with civilian movements. Whitman was right in what he did but it was certainly illegal. Crook was just looking for anything to use against Whitman. All of this seems so odd when you consider Crook’s later defense of the Indians—but it was reflective of his professional position at that time. ROBB: You mentioned that the valiant Howard Cushing, (captain, third cavalry, killed in 1871 while fighting Apaches), was attempting to make up for something he had done in the past. What did he do?  Howard Cushing  HUTTON: Cushing had disgraced his storied family name by a drunken prank at the end of the Civil War. He was a man in search of redemption. He made a reputation for valor in Arizona but he is pretty much forgotten today. He reminded me of Custer. ROBB: Gen. Crook not only demanded Apache heads, he put them up on sticks!! Really!?! HUTTON: Crook wanted to make a point and he certainly did. Years later, Geronimo commented on how easy it was to lose one’s head in Apache country if you did not follow the rules. ROBB: What did you mean when you wrote about Vincent Colyer’s “paternalistic racism?” (Colyer was a Quaker who attempted to assist the Apaches).  HUTTON: Colyer, and most of his fellow “humanitarians” were only interested in converting the Indians into “white Christian farmers,” with an emphasis on Christian. General Otis Howard was much the same. This was a despicable form of cultural genocide. At least the soldiers just wanted to fight the Apaches man to man. The so-called “friends of the Indians” were far worse than the soldiers.  Gen. Otis Howard ROBB: The Apache wars remind me of our American misadventures in the Middle East, bumbling into what we don’t really understand, constantly adopting new policies, which often work against other policies, changing commanders in the middle of the war, feeding them and bombing them, feeding them and bombing them. What do you think about that? HUTTON: Well, the comparison to our current misadventure is a compelling one. In both cases we are dealing with tribal societies which we seem to have a rather detached understanding of. In both cases we seem to want to introduce among them our cultural and political values. Guess what? It does not work. We are always surprised by this. ROBB: You write about a lot of frontier characters most Americans know nothing about. It’s the style now to attack and denigrate American historical figures, but you haven’t done that. You show Capt. John Bourke, third cavalry, (one of my personal favorites), Lt. Howard Cushing (third cavalry), Eugene Carr, Kit Carson, Thomas Jeffords, Scout Al Seiber, Gen. Otis Howard, and many others, as outstanding men. Army Scout Al Seiber HUTTON: I do not see much value in sitting in judgement on Americans from a different century with entirely different values. It is not as if we have done such a great job with the modern world that we are allowed to judge those who came before. These frontiersmen did the best they could in a very difficult environment. I found them both heroic and tragic, but I have no right to judge them. I leave that to my readers. ROBB: Were you aware you were writing against the fashion? Among these men, which do you admire most? Which is the most interesting? HUTTON: Well I admire Tom Jeffords and Cochise immensely. They both fought for peace in a world consumed by war and racial hatred. They were my childhood heroes and it was wonderful to discover how close the reality of their lives were to my childhood fantasies. ROBB: Before you did your research, were you aware Apache women had so much influence over the men? I am thinking of what John Bourke had to say about that. Have you found that to be true?  HUTTON: Well, humans are humans in any place or time. Lozen, of course, (the highly respected sister of Cochise, said to have psychic powers) was an exception to the normal role of a woman in Apache society. John Bourke, adjutant to Gen. Crook and author of several memoirs and anthropological works. He was a friend to the Apache.  But Apache women held enormous influence over all aspects of life. Once, while Geronimo was fleeing from pursuing troops, the band halted to observe a young girl’s puberty ceremony. I think that says everything about the importance of women. They were the givers of life. The Apache people were nothing without them. ROBB: Democracy seemed to have gotten in the way of Indian policy. Officials seemed to always do what earned them the most points with the voters rather than the right thing. Is that correct? HUTTON: The bottom line was that settlers voted and Indians did not. It was that simple. ROBB: It occurred to me while reading Apache Wars , that the Apaches got what they deserved from the Americans considering what they did to the Mexicans for so many years. What do you think about that?  The Apache Kid, first an Army scout, then later a sought-after renegade. HUTTON: The Apaches certainly made life a living Hell on the northern frontier of New Spain and then the Mexican Republic. Santa Anna agreed to the Gadsden Purchase because the Mexican northern frontier was indefensible. The Apaches actually assisted American expansion. The unrelenting Apache war on the Mexicans grew out of necessity (they lived by raiding) but then out of a quest for revenge. The Mexican slavery system and the hiring of professional scalphunters (some of whom were Americans) was outrageous. In many ways the Mexicans brought the Apache revenge raids on themselves. Kit Carson HUTTON continued: It is interesting that much of the conflict between the Americans and the Apaches was over Apache raids into Mexico. The Apaches refused to halt these raids and so the American government moved in to stop them. It was the American determination to protect the Mexicans that contributed to the continued warfare. That is often forgotten in the historical record of those dark days. Paul Hutton Tom Rizzo and His Stories: You Can’t Stop With One   Hello readers: I began to read The Lawbreakers, by Tom Rizzo, a few days ago and couldn’t stop, so I finished and bought The Law Keepers. Real-life stories about the West’s lawmen and their opponents are like popcorn, once you start you don’t want to stop. So, of course, my next move was to interview author Tom Rizzo and see what else I can find out. Julia Robb: Why did you write these books? Tom Rizzo: I wanted to provide an entertaining snapshot of at the good, the bad,  and the ugly of the American West—characters and events that shaped our rich history. Volume 1, The Unexpected , deals with some of the more bizarre stories of the frontier—ghosts, con men, a headless horseman, a phantom train. Stories, in many instances, that couldn’t be explained. Volume 2, The Law Keepers , deals with those whose job was to keep the peace—to the extent it was possible on such expansive territories—unique individuals who wore badges, but who often walked both sides of law and order. Courageous and daring lawmen who were passionate about their responsibility to make their corner of the frontier a safe place to live and rear a family.  Volume 3, The LawBreakers , was the most fun. I confess that when I was a kid, I enjoyed playing the outlaw in our neighborhood street plays of Cowboys and Indians. But fun aside, many lawbreakers were mean-spirited, vicious, quick to kill, and committed to taking what wasn’t theirs. Robb: Did you learn anything personally by researching the lawmen and the outlaws? Tom Rizzo: I’m struck by the courage of the lawmen I encountered. These guys put their lives on the line to carry out a responsibility to keep the peace. Some went to extraordinary lengths to do so and many simply had no quit in them. For example, a lawman by the name of Orlando “Rube” Robbins tracked an escaped prisoner across the Dakota Territory and into the Oregon Territory, finally captured him, and returned him to prison—a journey of over twelve hundred miles.   Harvey Whitehill Grant County Sheriff Harvey Whitehill of Silver City, New Mexico, happened to be the first lawman every to arrest Billy the Kid—twice. He let the Kid off with a warning the first time, but put him behind bars the second. He did escape, the first prisoner ever to do so from Whitehall’s jail. Another effective lawman was U.S. Deputy Marshal Bass Reeves, a former slave, who became a skilled shootist with either hand. In his law career, he arrested 3,000 felons and killed 14 men. As far as the lawbreakers, one of the cruelest was Bob Rogers who severely beat a deputy constable of the Cherokee Nation in a saloon brawl. Rogers left and waited in ambush, attacked the deputy and slashed his throat. He left but, for some reason, returned to the scene of the crime, disregarded several townspeople who sat by the body awaiting the sheriff. Rogers rode through their campfire, leaped off the horse, and attacked the corpse. He stomped the body, ripped legal documents out of his pocket, and took the victim’s hat. Another evil-to-the-core outlaw was Harry Tracy who escaped from Oregon State Pen in 1902, killing guards and civilians along the way. The escape triggered one of the most intensive manhunts of the last days of the Old West. Tracy’s end came at a small farmhouse outside Creston, Washington, where he engaged in a gun battle with a posse. Outlaw Harry Tracy Revealing cowardice rather than courage , Tracy—wounded and losing a lot of blood—crawled out of a wheat field, vowing never to be taken alive. He stuck a revolver under his right eye and pulled the trigger. Many of those who broke the law had no moral compass. Some were cruel beyond reason, willing to go to any extent to get what they want. Robb: Some of the lawmen seemed to ride both sides of the trail, first as a lawman, then as a criminal. Do you have any insight about this? Tom Rizzo: Everyone has a little good and bad in them, in most cases. These particular men were no different. Obviously, some pinned on a badge because it provided good cover and allowed them to operate with no scrutiny—an ideal position from which to launch a criminal career. For others, it came down to pure economic reasons. Most lawmen didn’t make a lot of money but, at the same time, had to feed and clothe a family. Sometimes when discreet opportunities arose, they’d take advantage of them and cross to the dark side. On example was Charlie Allison, a deputy sheriff in Colorado. Not satisfied with his low pay, Charlie decided to organize a gang of outlaws and rob stagecoaches. Pat Garrett Lon Chambers, on the other hand, spent most of his career riding the Texas Panhandle as a range detective in the late 1870s. He even rode a couple of years with Sheriff Pat Garrett trying to track down Billy the Kid. But suddenly decided to turn outlaw and form a gang. Not much is known about their crimes, but he did stand trial for robbing a Wells Fargo express car. Without hard evidence, though, he and the rest of the gang went free. Robb: Many of the outlaws seemed to be homicidal maniacs. Do you believe there were more of those in the Old West, or more now? And what causes this? Tom Rizzo: It’s difficult to compare the two eras. Back then, homicidal maniacs existed and most probably operated with more impunity. Law enforcement wasn’t as organized or dedicated. Lawmen patrolled hundreds of thousands of square miles of land, relying mostly on their own ingenuity and personal skills. Today, law enforcers are better organized and have the advantage of high-tech resources to identify, track, and hopefully apprehend such murderers. But it just wasn’t the outlaws who displayed cruel streaks. Some lawmen crossed the line as well. Among them was Deputy U.S. Marshal Bob Olinger of New Mexico. Before he pinned on a badge, he joined a gang of rustlers. He also got involved in the Lincoln County War, siding with the Murphy-Dolan-Riley faction. Bob Olinger Olinger was a big man and a big bully. When Billy the Kid was captured by Pat Garrett in late 1880, he was convicted of murdering Lincoln County Sheriff William Brady and transported to Lincoln and placed under 24 hour guard. One of the guards was Olinger who used every opportunity possible to harass Billy. But it all ended badly when The Kid got the drop on Olinger with the lawman’s own shotgun and killed him. Robb: Several of the men you wrote about in The Lawbreakers seemed to have more problems then just an urge to kill. I think of Clay Allison who also seemed to need to mutilate his victims. Were you surprised to discover stories like this? Clay Allison Tom Rizzo: Surprised, yes. But, mostly shocked by their capacity for cruelty. You mentioned Clay Allison, an excellent example. But I recently wrote a story about Bob Rogers who savagely beat a deputy constable of the Cherokee Nation in a barroom brawl. Later, he waited in ambush and slashed this constable’s throat. If that wasn’t enough, Rogers returned a short time later and actually attacked the dead man’s corpse. I’m sure there are examples much worse, but I haven’t run into them yet. Robb: There seemed to be a lot of juries who acquitted men of murder when it was clear they were guilty. Why was this? Tom Rizzo: That did happen a lot, Julia. And it was a bit of a mystery to me. I’m not sure about specifics but, in many instances, I believe the jury simply bought into whatever story the accused created and didn’t spend a lot of time zeroing in on the truth. At the same time, witnesses died or disappeared. Specific laws weren’t in place or were unclear as to how to deal with some crimes. Robb: What do you think about the lynch mobs who seemed to keep busy? Do you expect innocent men were hanged? Tom Rizzo: I have no doubt innocent men—and women—were hanged. Vigilante justice came about because of the lack of, or ineffective, law enforcement. Some communities had no formal law officer, so it was up to the citizens to keep the peace and punish the guilty. But it was brutal and violent way to enforce law, with little regard for guilt or innocence. Robb: What story intrigued you most, both in The Law Keepers  and The Lawbreakers ?? Frank James Tom: So many stories in The LawBreakers intrigued me that it’s difficult to pick one. Society tends to romanticize or humanize some of the more popular outlaws. Men like Jesse and Frank James, Bob and Cole Younger, Billy the Kid, and more. Keep in mind, these men were stone-cold killers. If you crossed them, they wouldn’t hesitate to kill. As far as a law keeper, I have to go hands-down with Elfego Baca, a man who personified the word Courage. A young, self-appointed deputy who single-handedly withstood an angry force of 80 Texas cowboys in New Mexico Territory who supposedly fired more than four-thousand rounds of ammunition, trying to flush him out of a jacal. Not only did he emerge unscathed, Baca went on to become a lawyer, Deputy U.S. Marshal, school superintendent, as well as the mayor and sheriff of Socorro County, New Mexico. Elfego Baca Robb: Did you believe James McIntire’s story about talking with Christ? Tom: Let’s say I believe McIntire believed it. I would have enjoyed hearing some specifics his conversation with Christ. McIntire, I’m sure, embraced a flair for the dramatic and was known to embellish. In a book he wrote, McIntire told a story about the time he served as deputy sheriff of Mobeetie, Texas. He claims Wyatt Earp and Dangerous Dave Mather came to town with phony gold bricks and tried to sell them but ran the two gunmen out of town. I can’t quite get my head around that one. Robb: What men did you learn to admire most? Tom: There were many. But some who come to mind include Frank Dalton Frank Dalton —one of the Dalton Brothers who rode as a law keeper and not a lawbreaker like his brothers. He was killed at 28 while trying to carry out an arrest. Sheriff Harry Morse of California’s Sausalito Valley staged a relentless manhunt for bandit Juan Soto. When he cornered him inside an adobe hunt, Morse and a deputy went in to get him and found themselves surrounded by several of Soto’s men. The deputy, worried and frightened, ran off leaving Morse to fend for himself. Despite the odds, Morse prevailed and ended up in a gunfight with Soto whom he ended up killing . Jeff Milton  I had great admiration for Jeff Milton, a former lawman who worked as an express messenger for Wells Fargo and foiled a robbery at Fairbank, Arizona, planned by former deputy sheriffs. In an exchange of gunfire, Milton went down with a bullet wounded to the arm. Bleeding badly and losing consciousness, Milton managed to close the express car door, crawl to the desk and take the key to the strongbox out and hurl it behind luggage. He then pretended to be dead when the outlaws gained entry. When they were unable to find a way to access the express box, the gang left. Milton lost the use of his arm but continued his law enforcement career in several capacities throughout the years. Robb: What man appalled you most? Tom: There are so many to pick from. But my top three include: Bob Rogers of Oklahoma Territory, who attacked a corpse, as I mentioned earlier in the interview. Second place goes to Deacon Jim, a church-going man who became a killer-for-hire and advertised his services at the rate of $150 per kill. Third place belongs to Bill Posey, an outlaw who hanged Matt Wallace, his own brother-in-law. Posey lynched Wallace in front of Wallace’s wife, Sarah, and two old daughters.   Caleb Pirtle Intrigues Readers With Thrillers: Lots of Them Author Caleb Pirtle explains “American operative Ambrose Lincoln has no idea where he is or has been or where he’s going. He believes he has been to the Night Side Of Dark, a place of the first death, from which no one can return.” Welcome to the Night Side Of Dark, a thriller set in World War II. After reading it, I immediately asked Caleb Pirtle if he would answer my questions for a blog. He agreed. So here we go. The first thing I’m going to do is let you read the remainder of the book description. “So why does Ambrose Lincoln find himself on the bomb-ruined landscape of Poland, or has he been exiled to the second death? “Lincoln only realizes, if the man in the shadows has not lied to him, he must find an ancient religious painting that has been missing for centuries.  “The German Gestapo will pay a fortune to buy it, or take a man’s life to get it. The painting, if legend holds true, is the German hierarchy’s final and only chance to escape the onslaught of the war that is crumbling around their feet.”  Caleb, your book is fascinating, like a combination of Hieronymus Bosch, the European painter known for his fantastic imagery and dark religious themes, and Dante’s Inferno. Robb: Why does American intelligence operate on Lincoln’s brain before he is sent to his Polish assignment? Caleb Pirtle: For every assignment, in each of the books, doctors working in a secret government hospital use surgery and electric shock treatments to re-program Lincoln’s brain. In essence, they are erasing his mind and his memory. They believe a man has a better chance of accomplishing his mission in the midst of war if he has no fear. Lincoln doesn’t know what fear is. He is not afraid of killing someone. He is not afraid of being killed. He is not afraid of being caught. He can work with mechanical precision. All of his fears have been removed. Robb: Why does he see, during the operation, the people he will be dealing with on the upcoming assignment? Pirtle : In my novels, Lincoln’s mind is programmed like a computer. The government knows what potential threats he will face and the kinds of people he will be working with and against. Those in his mind are different from the real people he encounters, but he recognizes them well enough to believe he’s been with them before. The idea for the Ambrose Lincoln series came from real mind control experiments our country conducting during the 1930s. Doctors used surgery, electric shock therapy, massive amounts of LSD and drugs on prisoners, the homeless picked off the street, and military volunteers. It met with some success, and only recently have Classified Top Secret papers on the experiments been released. Even in my novel, I point out that the experiments began with nine men, and only Lincoln has survived.  Robb: How does he see these people? Pirtle: He sees them during the experiments the same way we see visual images and people in our dreams. Often our dreams seem to go on for long periods of time but only last for a few minutes. Lincoln walks the landscape and comes across those the doctors are creating in his mind. They are showing moving pictures of an imaginary world that, soon enough for Lincoln, will become his real one. Robb: The place where Lincoln finds himself seems to be purgatory. Where did you mean for it to be? Pirtle: I wanted to readers to question where Lincoln was just as he questioned it. Perhaps it is purgatory. We all have our own visions of purgatory, and this is Lincoln’s own personal purgatory, which at times, seem more like hell without the fire and brimstone. He is told he is trapped somewhere between the first death and the second death, and that becomes the final death. The place does give him a reason to find an escape route through the veil of time. In essence, that sets up the story of the ancient religious painting. When Lincoln hears it, he is quick to understand it and believe it exists. After all, he had gone through the same escape door that’s in the painting. Robb: What does the first and second death mean?  Pirtle: For Lincoln, the first death is the loss of his mind, his memory, his fear. It is not unlike the grip that Alzheimer’s has on us. We think that even death is better than an existence without our mind and our memories. The second death is the one from which there is no return. It is the one confronting us all someday. Robb: Comments from reviewers? Pirtle: Some are confused at first, which is good. I wanted the readers to wonder what was happening, what was going on. As one reader said, it resembled the kind of strange world George Orwell might have envisioned. But I thought I need to drop Lincoln and the readers into a state of Purgatory so they would understand Lincoln, his actions, and his motives for the rest of the book. I think the book review from Linda Yezak captures the book: “The early chapters of this WWII noir illustrate the fractured mind of a man whose brain the government has scrambled too many times by the crude use of electro-therapy. But the story goes full circle, and the bizarre events the main character, Ambrose Lincoln, experiences early in the novel explain its end.” Robb: How do you have time to write so many books? Pirtle: Writing is what I do, and I’ve been doing it for a long time. The book total is 70 now when I release two new books this year. They have been completed and are in the editing stage. Working for Southern Living Magazine and a custom Dallas publishing company gave me the time and the responsibility to write a lot of books, mostly nonfiction, mostly travel and historical books. Not Yet Released  I’ve only been writing novels for the past few years. However, I am at my word machine by four or four-thirty every morning, and I will write from 2,500 to 5,000 words every day. It’s what I do. It’s what I love to do. Write that much regularly and books magically appear. Robb: You and your partner founded Venture Galleries, a website about books and art. How many unique visitors do you get, approximately, per year? Pirtle: On Venture Galleries, we will get about a quarter of a million unique visitors a year. It ranges from 15,000 to 30,000 a month.  Robb: What trends do you see in the book world?  Pirtle: I believe the major trend can be summed up in one word: shorter. There was a time when novels were expected to be 100,000 to 150,000 words. Now, because books are on an eReader, no one knows or notices how thick or skinny they are. We live in an impatient society. Almost everyone wants books that can be read quickly, so they can move on to another book. Most had rather read three 50,000 books than one 150,000 book. One of the trends in marketing is to have a new book on Amazon every three months, and that calls for shorter books and more books. By the same token, new novels are taking a lesson from James Patterson and writing shorter chapters. Patterson says when you come to the end of a chapter and realize the next chapter is only three or four pages long, you keep reading. But encounter a 20-page chapter with that long sea of gray type, and readers have a tendency to quit reading for a time. Robb: Have eBooks destroyed readership? Pirtle: I think the eBook revolution has great increased reading. Prices for eBooks are so reasonable that readers are willing to take chances on authors they’ve never read before. Besides, people now read on phones, iPads, and tablets, as well as eReaders. One survey indicated that most people spend almost two hours every day waiting: airports, doctor’s office, supermarket lines, automobile serve departments, etc. Readers keep their eBooks handy on all devices, and they read while they wait. I used to look for old magazines or newspapers to read and kill time. Now I whip out my oversized phone and start reading. Video games have never been more popular, and they have their own captive audience. But, among the people I know, television has gotten so bad and movies rely so much on special effects that people of a certain age – and there are millions of them – would rather sit around and read at night. Robb:  Are you the only writer to combine thriller and fantasy? Pirtle: I didn’t realize I had combined thriller and fantasy. I was just trying to write a thriller from a different point of view. Mind control was not fantasy. It was horrible for the participants, although I’m sure the hallucinations resembled a dose of fantasy more closely than anything else. As writers, we are always searching for a new way to tell a story. If I was able to combine thriller and fantasy, I’m glad that I did and will try to figure out a way to do it again.

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If a female deer is known as a doe, what is the male known as?

What is a female deer called? | Reference.com What is a female deer called? A: Quick Answer Female deer are commonly called does but may also be referred to as hinds or cows. Male deer are commonly called stags but are also known as harts, bucks or bulls, while young deer are known as calfs or fawns. Full Answer Deer can be found on every continent except Antarctica and Australia. The deer family includes around 100 different species, including moose, elk and reindeer. The deer is the only animal that has antlers, and these are typically only found on males, though the females of some species also have them. Deer can survive in most habitats but prefer edge habitats, such as croplands or woods.

Buck

What financial “whiz” is known as “The Oracle of Omaha”?

White-Tailed Deer | National Geographic White-Tailed Deer About the White-Tailed Deer White-tailed deer, the smallest members of the North American deer family, are found from southern Canada to South America. In the heat of summer they typically inhabit fields and meadows using clumps of broad-leaved and coniferous forests for shade. During the winter they generally keep to forests, preferring coniferous stands that provide shelter from the harsh elements. Breeding Adult white-tails have reddish-brown coats in summer which fade to a duller grayish-brown in winter. Male deer, called bucks, are easily recognizable in the summer and fall by their prominent set of antlers, which are grown annually and fall off in the winter. Only the bucks grow antlers, which bear a number of tines, or sharp points. During the mating season, also called the rut, bucks fight over territory by using their antlers in sparring matches. Female deer, called does, give birth to one to three young at a time, usually in May or June and after a gestation period of seven months. Young deer, called fawns, wear a reddish-brown coat with white spots that helps them blend in with the forest. Diet and Behavior White-tailed deer are herbivores, leisurely grazing on most available plant foods. Their stomachs allow them to digest a varied diet, including leaves, twigs, fruits and nuts, grass, corn, alfalfa, and even lichens and other fungi. Occasionally venturing out in the daylight hours, white-tailed deer are primarily nocturnal or crepuscular, browsing mainly at dawn and dusk. In the wild, white-tails, particularly the young, are preyed upon by bobcats, mountain lions, and coyotes. They use speed and agility to outrun predators, sprinting up to 30 miles (48 kilometers) per hour and leaping as high as 10 feet (3 meters) and as far as 30 feet (9 meters) in a single bound. Although previously depleted by unrestricted hunting in the United States, strict game-management measures have helped restore the white-tailed deer population. © 1996-2017 National Geographic Society.

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What singer was backed by band known as Crazy Horse?

Crazy Horse | Biography, Albums, Streaming Links | AllMusic Crazy Horse Biography by Greg Prato Best known as Neil Young's sidemen, but also a respected roots rock band with a long history in California rock circles.

Neil Young

To boldly go where no television series had gone before, what classic tv series had it's debut on NBC on Sept 8, 1966?

Crazy Horse - Crazy Horse | Songs, Reviews, Credits | AllMusic Crazy Horse google+ AllMusic Review by William Ruhlmann Since Crazy Horse first came to public attention as the backing band for Neil Young in concert and on his albums Everybody Knows This Is Nowhere and After the Gold Rush , it makes sense to expect that the band on its own would play something similar to the hard guitar rock and country-rock heard on those albums, albeit without Young 's distinctively quirky singing and songwriting, and that is what one hears to a large extent on the debut album Crazy Horse . (Although this is their first recording under that name, core members Danny Whitten , Billy Talbot , and Ralph Molina have appeared previously on record as part of the doo wop group Danny & the Memories and the rock band the Rockets .) But there is more going on than that. Also joining in, as singers and songwriters as well as sidemen, are veteran arranger/producer Jack Nitzsche and guitarist Nils Lofgren , while Ry Cooder adds slide guitar to a number of tracks. The result is a varied group of songs that range in style from rock and country to blues and folk. The overall quality of those songs is quite high, starting with Nitzsche and Russ Titelman 's "Gone Dead Train," previously heard being sung by Randy Newman on the soundtrack to Performance. ( Nitzsche and Titelman also contribute the pop-ish "Carolay.") The country hoedown "Dance, Dance, Dance" is a good Young cast-off, while the driving "Beggars Day" and "Nobody" were penned by Lofgren . These contributions serve as the supporting material for Whitten 's songs, however, as his five numbers are among the album's best, whether he's rocking out on the ominous "Downtown" (which appears to be about scoring dope) or sadly crooning the heartbreaking ballad "I Don't Want to Talk About It." (After being revived by Rod Stewart on Atlantic Crossing in 1975, the song was a chart single for him and went on to become a minor standard with covers by Rita Coolidge , Everything But the Girl , and Ian Matthews , among others.) Crazy Horse made the case for Whitten as a major talent and for the band as a strong act apart from Young . Track Listing

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In the Barry Manilow song “Copacabana”, who was the show girl?

BARRY MANILOW LYRICS - Copacabana (At The Copa) "Copacabana (At The Copa)" lyrics BARRY MANILOW LYRICS Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there She would merengue and do the cha-cha And while she tried to be a star Tony always tended bar Across the crowded floor, they worked from 8 til 4 They were young and they had each other Who could ask for more? [Chorus:] At the copa (CO!) Copacabana (Copacabana) The hottest spot north of Havana (here) At the copa (CO!) Copacabana Music and passion were always the fashion At the copa.... they fell in love His name was Rico He was escorted to his chair, he saw Lola dancing there And when she finished, he called her over But Rico went a bit to far Tony sailed across the bar And then the punches flew and chairs were smashed in two There was blood and a single gun shot But just who shot who? [Chorus] At the copa... she lost her love Her name is Lola, she was a showgirl But that was 30 years ago, when they used to have a show Now it's a disco, but not for Lola Still in dress she used to wear Faded feathers in her hair She sits there so refined, and drinks herself half-blind She lost her youth and she lost her Tony Now she's lost her mind [Chorus] At the copa... don't fall in love Don't fall in love Visit www.azlyrics.com for these lyrics. Thanks to Sdpaiad for correcting these lyrics.

Lola

The Marquis of Queensberry rules govern what sport?

Copacabana Copacabana   by Barry Manilow Copacabana is a TV-musical, stage musical, and nightclub show written by Barry Manilow, based on the song of the same name. The show toured the United States and, as of 2006, became available to license to performing companies and schools for the first time.[1] In 1980, while Manilow was on Merv Griffin’s TV show, he tried to persuade him into starring in a movie about the famous song. The television project began when Dick Clark approached Manilow and cowriters Bruce Sussman and Jack Feldman, and persuaded them to develop a musical film around their popular song, “Copacabana”. The made-for-TV film, directed by Waris Hussein and written by James Lipton was aired on CBS television on December 3, 1985. In this version, Annette O’Toole’s Lola was from Chicago, Illinois. In future adaptations the character’s origin changes.     Atlantic City stage show (1990-1991) It was next developed into an hour-long show for Caesars Circus Maximus Theatre in Atlantic City “Barry Manilow Presents Copacabana” starring Sean Sullivan as Tony/Stephen and Hillary Turk as Lola. It ran from September 1990 to June 1991 and had a cast of 20 singers and dancers which Manilow directed, with a script and song score created by Manilow and his longtime collaborators Bruce Sussman and Jack Feldman. The music track to this version of the show leaned heavily on the 1985 movie soundtrack. The show played to over 100,000 people in its first six months and received rave reviews as the “must-see casino show” in Atlantic City.[5] From this adaptation on forward the character Lola was from Tulsa, Oklahoma as stated in the beginning of “Just Arrived” Unreleased Barry Manilow Presents Copacabana Cast Recording Side One “Overture” (from 1985 movie) “Copacabana” (1978 Barry Manilow version) +”Just Arrived” – Lola ++”Dancin Fool” – Copa Girls “Let’s Go Steppin” – Copa Girls “Man Wanted” – Lola “Lola/Who Needs To Dream” – Tony Copa Writing Rico – Stephen “!Aye Caramba!” – Copa Girls Side Two +”Bolero de Amor” – Rico “Sweet Heaven (I’m In Love Again)” – Tony +”Welcome To Havana” – Conchita “Mermaids Tale” “El Bravo” – Lola and Tropicana cast “Who Needs To Dream” (reprise) Copa Finale “Copacabana 1985” (from soundtrack sung by Barry Manilow) + = Songs debuting in this version ++ = Song debuted in 1988 Big Fun on Swing Street CBS television special Stage musical UK (1994-1996) In 1994, the one-hour show was expanded into a three million dollar full-length musical. It premiered on March 21, 1994 at Theatre Royal in Plymouth, England. It also played Manchester, Edinburgh and then London’s West End at the Prince of Wales Theatre from June 23, 1994 to September 9, 1996. [6] [7] It followed with a UK tour for an additional year. This adaptation originally starred Gary Wilmot as Tony/Stephen and Nicola Dawn as Lola. An original cast album of this production was released, titled Copacabana: Original London Cast Recording. Stage musical US (2000) The UK Stage Musical adaptation, also known as Barry Manilow’s Copacabana: A New Musical Comedy, had its American premiere at Pittsburgh Central Catholic in 2009 followed by a run as part of the Dallas Summer Musical season. The book is by Barry Manilow, Bruce Sussman and Jack Feldman; lyrics by Bruce Sussman and Jack Feldman, and music by: Barry Manilow. Direction was by David Warren with choreography by Wayne Cilento. A US national tour followed from June 2000 through May 2001. The national tour cast included Franc D’Ambrosio as Tony, Darcie Roberts as Lola, Terry Burrell as Conchita, Philip Hernandez as Rico, Beth McVey as Gladys and Gavin MacLeod (followed by Dale Radunz) as Sam.[8] Stage Musical Sweden (2005) The show was translated to Swedish and set up by Linneateatern [2] at Växjö, Sweden, in the fall of 2005. The songs were translated to Swedish by actor John Martin Bengtsson [3], who played Stephen/Tony in the show.     The Present Day Stephen – A young songwriter, who doubles as Tony in 1947 Samantha – Stephen’s’s wife, who doubles as Lola La Mar in 1947 1947 Tony Forte – Young, good-looking and talented. A struggling songwriter by day, by night he works at the Copacabana. Lola la Mar – A young, pretty girl with misguided ambitions to become a Broadway star. Gladys Murphy – A cheeky, warm-hearted cigarette girl at the Copacabana. Sam Silver – The gruff but kind manager of the Copacabana. Rico Castelli – An elegant but dangerous gangster who manages The Tropicana in Havana. Conchita Alvarez – A Latina bombshell of the first order and Rico’s long-suffering partner/girlfriend. McManus – A New York cop of Irish descent. Willie – A waiter at the Copacabana. Carlos – A tropicana performer Luis – Rico’s enforcer and bodyguard Skip – The house choreographer at the Copacabana. Maitre D’ – The Snooty Headwaiter/host of the Copacabana. Coat Check Girl – Works at the Copacabana. Piano Accompanist Messers Hammerstein, Rodgers, Lerner, Lowe – Audition Lola for musicals A Back-of-the-House Voice – Plays various show writers, producers, a record producer Mr. Brill – A music publisher Another Music Publisher – Non-speaking Announcer – At The Tropicana Pirate Captain – At The Tropicana, in El Bravo Veronica Lake – Non-speaking Her Escort – Non-speaking x3 Bolero Couples Chorus – Show Girls, Show Boys, Copa Girls, Copa Boys, Tropicana Boys, Tropicana Girls, Copa Guests, Tropicana Guests, Pirates, Pirettes, Cops, Waiters, Busboys, Sailors, Fancy Gents, Thugs, Auditioners, Commuters, Porters, Rosie the Riveter, a Nurse, a WAC, a WAVE, a Salvation Army Sergeant gn—Jules Fisher (Won)   Just Arrived – Lola, Alice, Iris, Women Dancin’ Fool – Tony, Tim, Marcel, Copa Boys Sweet Heaven – Tony, Tim, Marcel, Tricia, Misty Audition Montage Scene How Can I Ever Thank You? – Tim The Jingle – Tony, Tricia, Misty The Audition – Lola When You’re A Copa Girl – Gladys Man Wanted – Lola Who Needs To Dream? – Tony, Women I Gotta Be Bad – Lola, Tricia, Misty, Copa Girls Bolero De Amor – Rico, Small Chorus of Bolero Couples Welcome To Havana – Conchita, Chorus ¡Ay Caramba! – Conchita, Carmen, Chorus Havana?! – Sam, Willie, McManus, Gladys,Tony Who Am I Kidding? – Sam, Willie, McManus, Gladys, Tricia, Misty Who Am I Kidding? (reprise) – Gladys, Willie, McManus, Tricia, Misty This Can’t Be Real – Lola, Stephen El Bravo :melos – Carlos Mermaids Tale – Conchita, Carmen, Pirettes El Bravo – Lola, Pirate Captain, Tony, Pirates, Pirettes Who Needs To Dream? (reprise) – Stephen, Samantha Copacabana Finale – Stephen, Company

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High tech companies Apple Inc, Microsoft, eBay, Expedia, and Google are traded on what stock exchange, the second largest in the world?

AAPL : Summary for Apple Inc. - Yahoo Finance AAPL : Summary for Apple Inc. - Yahoo Finance NasdaqGS - NasdaqGS Real Time Price. Currency in USD Add to watchlist At close: 4:00 PM EST 116.45 -0.07 (-0.06%) After hours: 4:46 PM EST People also watch: Apple Airpods review: You're worrying about the wrong thing In 2010, when a customer wrote Apple (AAPL) to complain about his iPhone 4 dropping calls, Steve Jobs himself emailed back. Here they are: Apple’s wireless, $160 AirPods. Starting with the iPhone 7, Apple joined a growing list of phone makers that are eliminating the headphone jack.

NASDAQ

Recently voiced by Danny DeVito, which Dr. Seuss character claims to speak for the trees?

From Private to Publicly Traded Firm: The Initial Public Offering From Private to Publicly Traded Firm: The Initial Public Offering             A private firm is restricted in its access to external financing, both for debt and equity. In our earlier discussion of equity choices, we pointed out the hard bargain venture capitalists extract for investing equity in a private business. As firms become larger and their capital needs increase, some of them decide to become publicly traded and to raise capital by issuing shares of their equity to financial markets. Staying Private versus Going Public             When a private firm becomes publicly traded, the primary benefit is increased access to financial markets and to capital for projects. This access to new capital is a significant gain for high growth businesses, with large and lucrative investment opportunities. A secondary benefit is that the owners of the private firm are able to cash in on their success by attaching a market value to their holdings. Thus, owners can become very wealthy individuals overnight. To illustrate, in a well publicized stock offering, Netscape, a company servicing the Internet, was valued at $2.1 billion on the day it went public. Jim Clark, the CEO and co-founder of the firm, who owned about 25% of the outstanding shares in the firm, found his stake valued at $565 million, while Marc Andreesen, the then 24-year old programmer who co-founded the firm, found his million shares to be worth $58.25 million.             These benefits have to be weighed against the potential costs of being publicly traded. The most significant of these costs is the loss of control that may ensue from being a publicly traded firm. As firms get larger and the owners are tempted to sell some of their holdings over time, the owner�s share of the outstanding shares will generally decline. If the stockholders in the firm come to believe that the owner�s association with the firm is hurting rather than helping it, they may decide to put pressure for the owner�s removal. In the case of Apple Computers, for instance, the two founders, Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak, were eventually removed from management positions, largely as a consequence of stockholder disapproval with their actions. In an ironic twist, Steve Jobs returned as Apple�s CEO in 1998 and engineered a turn around in its fortunes.             Other costs associated with being a publicly traded firm are the information disclosure requirements and the legal requirements [1] . A private firm experiencing challenging market conditions (declining sales, higher costs) may be able to hide its problems from competitors, whereas a publicly traded firm has no choice but to reveal the information. Yet another cost is that the firm has to spend a significant portion of its time on investor relations, a process in which equity research analysts following the firm are cultivated [2] and provided with information about the firm�s prospects.             Finally, firms may not be able to go public if they do not meet the minimum listing requirements for the exchange on which they want to be traded. The listing requirements vary across exchanges, with the New York Stock Exchange imposing the strictest requirements [pre-tax income of at least $ 2.5 million, tangible assets of at least $ 18 million and 2000 or more stockholders]. Most small firms, therefore, choose to get listed on the NASDAQ, which has far fewer restrictions on listing. While some of these firms move on to the NYSE as they become larger, firms like Intel and Microsoft have chosen to stay on the NASDAQ.             Overall, the net tradeoff to going public will generally be positive for firms with large growth opportunities and funding needs. It will be smaller for firms that have smaller growth opportunities, substantial internal cash flows, and owners who value the complete control they have over the firm. Choosing an Investment Banker             Once the decision to go public has been made, a firm generally cannot approach financial markets on its own. This is so because it is largely unknown to investors and does not have the expertise to go public without help. Therefore, a firm has to pick intermediaries to facilitate the transaction. These intermediaries are usually investment bankers, who provide several services. First, they help the firm meet the requirements of the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) in preparing and filing the necessary registration statements needed for the public offering. Second, they provide the credibility a small and unknown private firm may need to induce investors to buy its stock. Third, they provide their advice on the valuation of the company and the pricing of the new issue. Fourth, they absorb some of the risk in the issue by guaranteeing an offer price on the issue; this guarantee is called an underwriting guarantee. Finally, they help sell the issue by assembling a group called an underwriting syndicate, who try to place the stock with its clients. The underwriting syndicate is organized by one investment bank, called the lead investment bank.             There are three costs associated with an initial public offering. First, the firm must consider the legal and administrative cost of making a new issue, including the cost of preparing registration statements and filing fees. Second, the firm should examine the underwriting commission �� the gross spread between the offering price and what the firm receives per share, which goes to cover the underwriting, management, and selling fees on the issue. This commission can be substantial and decreases as the size of the issue increases. Figure 17.9 summarizes the average issuance and underwriting costs for issues of different sizes, reported by Ritter (1998). Source: Ritter The third cost is any underpricing on the issue, which provides a windfall to the investors who get the stock at the offering price and sell it at the much higher market price. Thus, for Netscape, whose offering price was $29 and whose stock opened at $50, the difference of $21 per share on the shares offered, is an implicit cost to the issuing firm.  While precise estimates vary from year to year, the average initial public offering seems to be underpriced by 10-15%. Ibbotson, Sindelar, and Ritter (1993), in a study of the determinants of underpricing, estimate its extent as a function of the size of the issue. Figure 17.10 summarizes the underpricing as a percent of the price by size of issue. Source: Ibbotson, Sindelar and Ritter             If the only task for the issuing company were to find the investment banker who could deliver the lowest combined cost, including both underwriting commission and underpricing costs, the whole process could be opened up to auction and the investment banker that promised to deliver the highest net proceeds to the firm would be chosen. There are several problems with this ideal scenario, however. First, the proceeds from the issue, based upon the offering price, may not be delivered, and the investment bank may not have the capital to back up its guarantee. Second, a bungled initial public offering �� one whose offering price is set too high �� can create lasting damage to the issuing firm�s reputation and affect its ability to make future issues. Third, the investment banker of choice may not have the specialized expertise [3] , say in biotechnology or software development, to provide the advice needed to help the issuing company decide on the particulars of the issue. Fourth, given that this is a private firm, no investment banker may be willing to estimate an offering price without receiving more information from the firm. Finally, the presumption that there will be a large number of investment bankers contending for the issue may not hold true. A number of private firms have to seek out and convince an investment banker to take them public and do not have the luxury of choosing between multiple bidders.             Given these problems, private firms tend to pick investment bankers based upon reputation and expertise, rather than price. A good reputation provides the credibility and the comfort level needed for investors to buy the stock of the firm; expertise applies not only to the pricing of the issue and the process of going public but also to other financing decisions that might be made in the aftermath of a public issue. The investment banking agreement is then negotiated, rather than opened up for competition. Valuing the Company and Setting Issue Details             Once the firm chooses an investment banker to take it public, the next step is to estimate a value for the firm. This valuation is generally done by the lead investment bank, with substantial information provided by the issuing firm. The value is sometimes estimated using discounted cash flow models, similar to those described in chapter 5. More often, though, the value is estimated by using a multiple, like a price earnings ratio, and by looking at the pricing of comparable firms that are already publicly traded. Whichever approach is used, the absence of substantial historical information, in conjunction with the fact that these are small companies with high growth prospects, makes the estimation of value an uncertain one at best.             The other decision the firm has to make relates to the size of the initial issue and the use of the proceeds. In most cases, only a portion of the firm�s stock is offered at the initial public offering; this reduces the risk on the under pricing and enables the owners to test the market before they try to sell more stock. In most cases, the firm uses the proceeds from the initial stock issue to finance new investments.             The next step in this process is to set the value per share for the issuer. To do so, the equity in the firm is divided by the number of shares, which is determined by the price range the issuer would like to have on the issue. If the equity in the firm is valued at $ 50 million, for example, the number of shares would be set at 5 million to get a target price range of $10, or at 1 million shares to get a target price range of $ 50 per share.             The final step in this process is to set the offering price per share. Most investment banks set the offering price below the estimated value per share for two reasons. First, it reduces the bank�s risk exposure, since it ensures that the shares will be bought by investors at the offering price. (If the offering price is set too high and the investment bank is unable to sell all of the shares being offered, it has to use its own funds to buy the shares at the offering price.) Second, investors and investment banks view it as a good sign if the stock increases in price in the immediate aftermath of the issue. For the clients of the investment banker who get the shares at the offering price, there is an immediate payoff; for the issuing company, the ground has been prepared for future issues. In setting the offering price, investment bankers have the advantage of first checking investor demand. This process, which is called building the book, involves polling institutional investors prior to pricing an offering, to gauge the extent of the demand for an issue. It is also at this stage in the process that the investment banker and issuing firm will present information to prospective investors in a series of presentations called road shows. In this process, if the demand seems very strong, the offering price will be increased; in contrast, if the demand seems weak, the offering price will be lowered. In some cases, a firm will withdraw [4] an initial public offering at this stage, if investors are not enthusiastic about it. SEC Requirements             In order to make a public offering the United States, firms have to meet several requirements. First, they have to file a registration statement and prospectus with the SEC, providing information about the firm�s financial history, its forecasts for the future and how it plans for the funds it raises from the initial public offering. The prospectus provides information about the riskiness and prospects of the firm for prospective investors in its stock. The SEC reviews this information and either approves the registration or sends out a deficiency memorandum asking for more information. While the registration is being reviewed, the firm may not sell any securities, though it can issue a preliminary prospectus, titled a red herring, for informational purposes only.             Once the registration has been approved by the SEC, the firm can place a tombstone advertisement in newspapers and other publications. This ad contains details of the issue, the name of the lead investment banker, and the names of other investment bankers involved in the issue. The order in which the investment bankers are listed is significant. At the top is the lead investment banker and the co-managers of the issue, followed by the major bracket investment bankers. The categorization is based both upon reputation and national focus. Then comes the mezzanine bracket, which includes smaller investment banks that operate nationally, and at the bottom are the regional investment bankers involved with the issue. Figure 17.11 shows a typical tombstone advertisement for an initial public offering. Figure 17.11: Tombstone Advertisement

i don't know

Including such improvements as the falling shuttle and a presser foot, what household item did Isaac Singer improve in 1851?

Singer Sewing Machines Singer Sewing Machines Have you ever tried to restore Singer sewing machines ? By the looks of it, you may think an old Singer sewing machine is complicated. But, its mechanism is simple and easy to restore. Three tips to know before restoring Singer sewing machine parts First - before anything else, let an expert technician check the condition of the machine. He has to check if all parts are intact and in good working condition. The different parts of a sewing machine have different procedures of disassembling, cleaning, and reassembling. Second - take into consideration the machine’s value before you decide to restore it in any way. As much as possible, it is still better to leave it in its original condition. Oftentimes, the value and desirability of a machine drops as it undergoes changes and repairs. Third - there are simple ways of taking care of a machine without much work needed. The best way to return the wood’s original and beautiful shiny feature is to rub some lemon oil. If you do this process for several weeks, you can regain the brand new condition of the machine. It is common for the metal parts of any old type of machine to rust or crack its paint. Most collectors are attracted to this kind of look, so no need to repaint or sand it down. The machinery or mechanism of the machine only needs some sewing machine oil and belt to get it back in good condition. Once you finish doing all of these tips, you can search and check the machine’s worth. However, if your machine needs more repair, you may check out some steps on how to repair Singer sewing machines . Posted by Singer sewing machines are durable items that will certainly last long, even for decades. This is the reason why lots of antique collectors are fond of including an old Singer sewing machine in their collection. How to Check the Value of Sewing Machines? 1) Auction value This is also known as an “open market price” and is based on the selling prices of same items at auctions sales. 2) Estate value It is also called as tax value, as the Internal Revenue Service impose on the price of the said items. The value is based on the average price of all items being sold at auctions. 3) Fair Market value This is the agreed selling price between that of the buyer and seller. As long as either party is not pressured to make the sale and both are aware of all the relevant details about the item. 4) Insurance value So far, this is the highest price which can be given to any antique item because it is the cost of buying a replacement for any damaged or lost item. 5) Retail value The price of an item as it will be sold individually in antique shops. 6) Wholesale value This is the price of an item if bought in bulk. The price per piece would be 30% lesser than the retail value. If you are also an avid collector of Singer sewing machines , the six types of value mentioned above will be your guide to check on the worth of your sewing machines. It will be amazing to discover old sewing machines might cost more than new and modern models. Posted by Different Models of Singer Sewing Machines Singer sewing machines are frequently found at flea markets, estate sales and garage sales. Most of these are being offered at very low prices. You can see lots of antique collectors going to these places to look for an old Singer sewing machine and other antique models. Tracing Back Singer’s Brief History In 1850, inventors Blodgett and Lerow started a machine which moves in a circular motion with the needle positioned in a horizontal angle. Isaac Merrit Singer saw much potential and believed it will work better with some improvements. So he made many changes to make it simpler and perform better. He made it this time with a straight needle which works vertically. Later on, he did more improvements like the following: traverse shuttle, straight needle, presser foot, overhanging arm, support table, gear operation, treadle, and lock stitching. With these improvements, the company has manufactured a lot of sewing machines for different sewing purposes. List of Antique Singer Sewing Machines 1) 221 Singer featherweight 5) Midgets and toy sewing machine models List of Singer Machines Invented in the 1900s 1900 – Singer 66 Sewing machine 1921 – Portable Electric Sewing Machine 1933 – Featherweight Sewing Machine - invented to produce 4,000 stitches in just sixty seconds 1952 – Model 206 1965 – Touch and Sew Models 1975 – Athena 2000 1978 – Touchtronic 2001 - first computerized machine Since the invention of Singer sewing machines , it has been known as one of the most trusted sewing machine makers in the world. And you can always trust on the reliability and durability of its world class sewing machines. Posted by Singer Sewing Machines: Guide in Using a Treadle Machine Singer sewing machines are easy to use. In fact, there are some guides for sewing which you can find in a Singer sewing machine manual. You can also ask some people who know how to use these machines to teach you some sewing techniques. I think any seamstress enjoys sewing on a treadle sewing machine. It is because it is easier to use compared to any other modern sewing machines. For those who would like to use a treadle machine, here is your quick guide in sewing. 1) Grab a chair and sit with your back straight. 2) Insert the cloth or fabric beneath the needle. Lower the presser foot to let the needle touch the fabric. 3) Pull the hand wheel slowly and softly towards your direction. 4) Place your feet on the treadle. Your right foot should be positioned on the upper right corner and your left foot on the lower left corner. Make your own rhythm by swinging the treadle back and forth. 5) Run the fabric through the needle to make some stitches and turn it around in order to sew in the opposite direction. Now you are ready to begin your sewing project using a treadle machine. If you want to have your own treadle machine, the Singer Company still manufactures these models on a limited scale. You can also check at antique shops, estate sales, flea markets, thrift stores, and online shops like eBay. Owning Singer sewing machines is indeed a wise decision because this brand has been tested and trusted by experts. Posted by Singer’s Brief History and Evolution: Discover the Secrets of Singer Embroidery Machines What can you i magine as the history of Singer embroidery machines ? When asked about embroidery, what is the first thing that will appear in your mind? Probably, you are thinking of noble women; who work together in order to create the finest set of clothes for a king. Actually, the embroiderers or craftsmen during those times were men. In fact, to become such they need to master the craft for many years. The art of embroidery started way back 3000 BC. Bayeux tapestry is one of the oldest well known embroideries that were ever made. It was done in 1066 and it measures up to 231 feet. It is believed to be the work of a hundred noble women who spent many years for its completion. Tracing the History of Invention of an Embroidery Machine In 1828, Josue Heilmann invented one of the first embroidery machines. It made possible to ease the difficulty of embroidery by hand. Heilman was able to sell two machines during this time. The discovery of a sewing machine in the past led the way to the discovery of doing embroidery at home. This started with the discovery of an eye pointing needle by Walter Hunt in the year 1834. It was then revised by Elias Howe in the year 1846. In the year 1851, Isaac Singer started the mass production of Singer machines. In 1863, Isaac Groebli came up with a new kind of machine after spending many years to perfect his invention. His oldest son continued the development of his creation which is an automatic Schiffli machine that could allow sewing in different directions. And since then, singer embroidery machines continue to improve to provide for the requirements of embroidery lovers. Posted by The Evolution of Singer Embroidery Machines Now that we know how singer embroidery machines came about, let us now look at how it has evolved over the years to what it is now; the best embroidery machine any sewer would want to have. Since computers were not yet used at that time, the early machine embroideries were created with the use of mechanical machines. Designs were punched on a paper tape which is quite meticulous because one slight error would destroy the whole design. The term “punching” that is used to refer to the modern way of embroidery digitizing originated from this concept. At the start of 1990’s, the embroidery machine became more popular as computers become cheaper. Computerized embroidery designs and machines made machine embroidery more simple and available to home embroidery enthusiasts. Now, embroidery designs are already available anywhere and can be bought in discs. It can also be downloaded from the World Wide Web. There are also programs which can convert pictures into an embroidered design. After which you can embroider your memories on a fabric. Probably, Singer is the most recognized brand name in both sewing and embroidery. It has continuously proven the high quality feature of all of its machines for the past years. So if you would give your trust, rely only with the best - Singer Embroidery Machines . Posted by

Sewing machine

What is the name for the raised portions on the neck of a stringed instrument, such as the guitar or banjo, which divide the neck into fixed segments?

Bio – Page 31 – Exequy's Blog American History , Bio , History , Women Margaret Tobin Brown (July 18, 1867 – October 26, 1932) was an American socialite, philanthropist, and activist who became famous as one of the survivors of the sinking of the RMS Titanic. She worked actively to protect the rights of women, children, and minorities. She became known, by her own declaration, following the Titanic disaster, as The Unsinkable Molly Brown and has been known ever after by that appellation. Early Life and Family Margaret Tobin was born in Hannibal, Missouri, one of six children of Irish immigrants. The house in which she was born was located in an area then known as “Irish Shanty Town.” The tiny houses were close together on dirt streets. The livestock were housed in the basement room next to the kitchen, as the Tobin’s could not afford to build a barn. Margaret’s parents, John and Johanna Tobin, raised a close-knit Irish Catholic family. They were active in the local Hannibal Church. Johanna’s sister, Mary O’Leary, lived across the street from the family and taught school. Margaret received a basic grammar school education. But at age 13 she was expected to get a job to help support the family. Margaret went to work in a four-story brick tobacco factory. There were several tobacco factories in Missouri at that time, as tobacco was a major crop. It continued to be a major crop into the early 1900s. Men, women and children worked in the factories, preparing the leaves for export, or rolling them into cigars. It was dusty, unhealthy work, and they were worked 12-hour days, six days a week. When she was 18, Margaret moved to Leadville, Colorado, with her sister, obtaining a job in a department store. It was here she met and married James Joseph “J. J.” Brown, an enterprising, self-educated man, in 1886. Margaret had always planned on marrying a rich man but she married J. J. for love. She said, I wanted a rich man, but I loved Jim Brown. I thought about how I wanted comfort for my father and how I had determined to stay single until a man presented himself who could give to the tired old man the things I longed for him. Jim was as poor as we were, and had no better chance in life. I struggled hard with myself in those days. I loved Jim, but he was poor. Finally, I decided that I’d be better off with a poor man whom I loved than with a wealthy one whose money had attracted me. So I married Jim Brown. The Brown’s first child, Lawrence Palmer Brown, was born on August 30, 1887 in Hannibal, Missouri. Their second child, Catherine Ellen Brown, nicknamed Helen, was born on July 1, 1889 in Leadville, Colorado. Activism It was in Colorado that Brown first became involved in women’s rights, helping to establish the Colorado chapter of the National American Women’s Suffrage Association, and worked in soup kitchens to assist miners’ families. The family came into great wealth when J. J.’s engineering efforts proved instrumental in the production of a substantial gold and copper seam at the Little Jonny mine of his employers, Ibex Mining Company, and he was awarded 12,500 shares of stock and a seat on the board. In 1894, the Browns moved to Denver, Colorado, which gave the family more social opportunities. Margaret became a charter member of the Denver Woman’s Club, whose mission was the improvement of women’s lives through continuing education and philanthropy. In 1901, she was one of the first students to enroll at the Carnegie Institute in New York. Adjusting to the trappings of a society lady, Brown became well-immersed in the arts and fluent in French, German and Russian. In 1909 and 1914 she ran for Congress; she also assisted in the fund-raising for Denver’s Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception which was completed in 1912. Margaret also worked with Judge Ben Lindsey to help destitute children and establish the United States’ first juvenile court, which helped form the basis of the modern U.S. juvenile courts system. Her lifelong career as a human and labor rights advocate earned her prominence in the aftermath of the Ludlow Massacre in Trinidad, Colorado in 1914. Aboard the Titanic Margaret was on a European tour with her daughter Helen in April of 1912 when she learned that her first grandson, Lawrence, was ill. She immediately booked first class passage back to the United States on the first ship that was available, the Titanic. When the ship collided with the iceberg and began to sink, she helped many others to the lifeboats before being forced into one herself. Once in the water, she and the other women in lifeboat number six worked together to row and keep spirits up despite the alleged panic and gloom of Quartermaster Robert Hichens. After being rescued by the RMS Carpathia, Brown helped prepare lists of those who had been rescued, acted as a translator for other survivors, and headed the Titanic Survivors’ Committee, a group of wealthy survivors who raised funds to help those less fortunate among surviving passengers and crew. The committee collected $10,000 from survivors and Carpathia passengers by the time the ship made port in New York City. She later raised funds to reward Captain Rostron and his crew; she personally presented Rostron with a loving cup on behalf of the Titanic survivors in New York City. The media acclaimed her as one of the heroines of the hour for both her grace under pressure and her useful contributions. She was quoted as saying that her survival was attributable to “typical Brown luck… we’re unsinkable.” She became known as the Unsinkable Mrs. Brown for the rest of her life. She was also one of the people behind the raising of the Titanic Memorial in Washington, D.C. Later Life Her fame as a prominent Titanic survivor helped her promote the issues she felt deeply about—the rights of workers and women, education and literacy for children, and historic preservation. During World War I, while in France, she worked with the American Committee for Devastated France to rebuild areas behind the front line, and helped wounded French and American soldiers. She was awarded the French Legion of Honor shortly before her death for her “overall good citizenship” including her relief work in France, her efforts for Titanic survivors, and her activism and philanthropy at home in America. Margaret Tobin Brown died of a brain tumor on October 26, 1932, in New York City. She was 65 years old. The Myth of Molly Brown The legend of “Molly” Brown was created by Denver Post reporter Gene Fowler, who in the 1930s wrote a number of imaginative folk stories about Margaret Brown. Sensationalist writer Carolyn Bancroft elaborated upon Fowler’s stories and her highly fictional depiction of Brown’s life was turned into a pamphlet, a radio script, and eventually a Broadway musical called The Unsinkable Molly Brown. MGM turned the musical into a 1964 film starring Debbie Reynolds as Margaret “Molly” Brown and Harve Presnell as J. J. Brown. The Brown family at first attempted to mitigate or correct the legend of “Molly,” but eventually withdrew from the public and refused to speak with writers, reporters, or historians. Only recently have they agreed to cooperate with the efforts of a historian, Kristen Iversen, and allowed access to letters, scrapbooks, photographs, and many personal effects of Margaret Tobin Brown that had previously been unavailable. The first full-length biography of Margaret Tobin Brown was published in June, 1999. Margaret Brown has also been depicted in many of the films and television series with varying degrees of realism. She was played by Kathy Bates in the 1997 film Titanic and by Marilu Henner as a sassy bombshell in the 1996 television miniseries of the same name. The Gemini 3 spacecraft was named Molly Brown by Commander Gus Grissom in reference to his previous spaceflight on Liberty Bell 7 which ended with the Mercury spacecraft sinking during recovery in the Atlantic. Molly Brown House After acquiring their wealth, James and Margaret bought their Denver, Colorado, home (built in 1889) located at 1340 Pennsylvania Street. It was a three-story, Victorian-style house made of Colorado lava stone with sandstone trim. It was typical of the homes built in the surrounding Capitol Hill neighborhood near the turn of the twentieth century. At 7,600 square feet, the home was considered merely an average upper-middle-class home at the time. The House has been restored to its 1910 appearance. The exhibits illustrate Margaret Brown’s life there between 1894 and 1912. Permanent exhibits include early twentieth century furnishings and art objects as well as temporary exhibitions that illuminate various aspects of Victorian era life, from a servant’s life to Victorian garments.   American History , Bio , Entertainment , History , Women   Martha Jane Canary-Burke, better known as Calamity Jane (May 1, 1852 – August 1, 1903), was a frontiers woman and professional scout. She gained fame fighting Native Americans. Many legends and stories have been told about her. It is difficult to sort fact from fiction in many cases, however she led a life of bravery and courage that few women of that time would have survived. Early life “Calamity” Jane was born Martha Jane Canary in Princeton, Missouri, the oldest of six children, having two brothers and three sisters. Jane was described as being attractive, with dark eyes. Her mother supplemented the family income by taking in washing from nearby mining camps. She died from pneumonia in 1866, and Jane’s father died one year later in 1867. Jane lived for a time in Virginia City, Nevada. She received little to no formal education, but was literate. After her father’s death, she took on the role as head of the household. At the age of sixteen she decided to moved her family to Fort Bridger, in Wyoming. She then moved them to Piedmont, Wyoming. She settled her siblings there and strove to create a home that would be welcoming. Once the family was settled she moved on to a rougher, mostly outdoor adventurous life on the Great Plains. In 1870, she signed on as a scout, and adopted the uniform of a soldier. It is unclear whether she was actually enlisted in the United States Army at the time. From then on she mostly lost touch with her younger siblings, preferring to live a more wild and unsettled life. “Calamity Jane,” as she would become known, lived a very colorful and eventful life. However, as historians have since discovered, she was gifted storyteller with a wonderful imagination and sometimes altered the facts to make her adventures more exciting to the listener. Calamity’s career Jane wanted to be a soldier. She even went so far as dressing in mens clothing. She joined General George Custer in 1870 as a scout. Her first assignment was in Arizona for the “Indian Campaign.” It was her job to force the Native Americans onto reservations. In 1872, she was sent to Fort Sanders, Wyoming, where the scouts were ordered out to the Muscle Shell or Nursey Pursey Indian outbreak. That campaign, in which Generals Custer, Miles, Terry, and Crook were engaged, lasted until the fall of 1873. Next, they were stationed at Goose Creek, Wyoming. Jane added the “calamity” to her her name during this time. The troops were sent out to handle a Native American uprising. Several days later on the way back to their camp, they were ambushed by a large group of Indians. Captain Egan, who was in command, was shot and thrown from his horse. Jane immediately upon seeing Captain Egan fall galloped over to him and lifted him up onto her horse and brought him to safety. Captain Egan soon recovered and said, “I name you Calamity Jane, the heroine of the plains.” Deadwood, South Dakota and Wild Bill Hickok In 1876, Calamity Jane left the army and settled in the area of Deadwood, South Dakota, in the Black Hills, and she became friends with Wild Bill Hickok and Charlie Utter, having traveled with them to Deadwood in Utter’s wagon train. Calamity greatly admired Hickok and was keenly interested with his personality and life. Jane was devastated when Wild Bill Hickok was shot in the back of the head while gambling in Deadwood on the August 2, 1876. Hickok was holding a pair of eights and a pair of aces when he was killed, which would forever be known as a “dead man’s hand.” The town of Deadwood closed down for the funeral, as everyone was in attendance. Jack McCall was later hanged for the murder. Jane claimed that following Hickok’s death, she went after Jack McCall, with a meat cleaver, having left her guns at her residence in the excitement of the moment. Following McCall’s hanging for the offense, Jane continued living in the Deadwood area for some time, and at one point she helped save several passengers of an overturned stagecoach by diverting several Plains Indians who were in pursuit of the stage. The stagecoach driver, John Slaughter, was killed during the pursuit, and Jane took over the reins and drove the stage on into its destination. Deadwood was the site of some major gold strikes and Jane worked as a bull whacker, hauling machinery and supplies from town to the mining camps. She also worked as a pony express rider and carried the United States mail between Deadwood and Custer cities. It was a fifty-mile trail and considered to be one of the roughest trails in those famous Black Hills. Calamity Jane was well respected for her horsemanship and ability to make the trip quickly and with little incident. This gained her new respect and admiration in the Deadwood area. The Wild West Show and Calamity’s later life: 1884-1903 In 1884, Jane moved to El Paso, Texas, where she met Clinton Burke. They married in August 1885, and had a daughter in 1887. The marriage, however, did not last, and by 1895 they were officially separated. Having the reputation for being able to handle a horse better than most men and shoot like a cowboy, her skills took her into Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show in 1895 where she performed sharp shooting astride her horse. She toured Minneapolis, then Chicago, St. Louis, and Kansas City, bringing to the stage the west as she had lived it. Unfortunately Jane often misbehaved to the point of being fired. The Wild West show was no exception. She traveled around the country and eventually, in 1903, died penniless and alone in Terry, South Dakota, near Deadwood, succumbing to complications from pneumonia. In accordance with her dying wish, she is buried next to Wild Bill Hickok in Mount Moriah Cemetery, overlooking the city of Deadwood. Several films have been made about the life of Calamity Jane, the most famous being the musical of the same name starring Doris Day. The TV series Deadwood gives a realistic depiction of Jane. Share this: Bio , Canada , Canadian History , History , Science Gerald Vincent Bull (March 9, 1928 – March 22, 1990) was a Canadian engineer who developed long-range artillery. He moved from project to project in his quest to economically launch a satellite using a huge artillery piece, to which end he designed the Project Babylon “supergun” for the Iraqi government. Bull was assassinated outside his apartment in Brussels, Belgium in March 1990. Education Early life Bull was born in North Bay, Ontario, to George L.T. and Gertrude Isabelle LaBrosse Bull. George Bull was from a family from the Trenton area and had moved to North Bay in 1903 to start a law firm. As a Catholic, LaBrosse would have been forbidden from marrying Bull, as he was Anglican. Bull converted to Catholicism on February 20, 1909, and the two married three days later. Over the next few years the couple had 10 children: Bernice Gwendolyn Florence, Henry, Philis, Charles Esmond, Clyde, Vivian, Ronald, Frank, Gerald, and Gordon. George Bull was offered the position of King’s Counsel in 1928. The family was well off, but the Wall Street Crash of 1929 and ensuing Great Depression dramatically changed their circumstances. Within a year the loans Bull had taken to buy stocks on margin were called in, and the family was forced to move to Toronto to look for work. The next year Gertrude Bull suffered complications while giving birth to Gordon. She died April 1, 1931. George Bull suffered a nervous breakdown and fell into heavy drinking; he left his children in the care of his sister Laura, who fell victim to cancer and died in mid-1934. The next year, banks foreclosed on the family home. The same year, George, at the age of 58, met and married Rose Bleeker. He gave up the children to various relatives: Gerald ending up living with his older sister Bernice. In 1938, Gerald was sent to spend the summer holidays with his uncle and aunt, Philip and Edith LaBrosse (Philip was the younger brother of Gerald’s mother Gertrude). During the Depression, Phil and Edith had won about $175,000 in the Irish Sweepstakes, so were relatively well off. Gerald was sent to an all-boys school run by the Jesuit order, Regiopolis College in Kingston. Despite his being too young to attend, the school allowed him to start in 1938 and he returned to spend the summers with the LaBrosses. During this time he took up the hobby of building balsa wood airplanes of his own design, and was a member of the school’s modeling club. He graduated in 1946. University After graduating, Bull entered Queen’s University, with hopes of eventually entering officers’ training school. Philip LaBrosse visited the University of Toronto with the intention of having Bull placed there. He wrote to Bull, who was in Kingston, having found room in the medical school. Bull declined the offer and instead asked LaBrosse if a position in the new aeronautical engineering course was available. The department, being brand new, had limited qualifying criteria for entrance and agreed to interview Bull even though he was only sixteen years old – and he was accepted into the undergraduate program. Records and recollections of both classmates and his professors show little evidence of Bull’s brilliance; one professor noted that “He certainly didn’t stand out”. After graduating in 1948, with marks that were described as “strictly average”, Bull took a drafting job at A.V. Roe Canada. Later that year, the University opened a new Institute of Aerodynamics (now the Institute for Aerospace Studies) under the direction of Dr Gordon Patterson. The Institute operated on a small budget and could afford to employ only twelve students, accepting three per year for a four-year period, and was funded by the Defence Research Board (DRB). Bull applied and was accepted at Patterson’s personal recommendation, as Patterson felt that any lack in academics was made up for by Bull’s tremendous energy. Bull was soon partnered up with fellow student Doug Henshaw, and the two were given the task of building a supersonic wind tunnel, which was at that time a relatively rare device. When the Royal Canadian Air Force donated land adjacent to RCAF Station Downsview to the Institute, the operations were quickly moved. During construction, Bull used the wind tunnel as the basis for his September 15, 1949 Master’s thesis, on the design and construction of advanced wind tunnels. The tunnel was to be featured prominently during the opening of the new Institute grounds, leading to an all-night rush to get it fully operational in time for the presentation. The work was completed at 3:30 am, but the team was too exhausted to test it. The next day Air Marshal Curtis pushed the start button and nothing happened, but Dr Patterson quickly reached around, pushed harder, and the wind tunnel worked perfectly. Bull had largely finished his PhD thesis on the same topic in 1950, when a request from the DRB asking that the Institute provide an aerodynamicist to help on their Velvet Glove Missile project arrived. It was to be an unpaid position on which the volunteer would remain on a normal PhD stipend from the University. Patterson selected Bull for the position, which led to a period of successful work at the Canadian Armament and Research Development Establishment, or CARDE. Career CARDE CARDE, the Canadian Armament and Research Development Establishment, was formed as a joint Canadian-British operation to study artillery and ballistics, in an effort to harness the intellectual resources of Canada, as well to place developing British technology outside of German reach during World War II. Formed up on a military training area and artillery range outside Valcartier, northwest of Quebec City, CARDE was one of a number of research divisions of the DRB that were well funded in the immediate post-war era. CARDE was researching supersonic flight and a variety of rocket and missile projects when Bull was asked to join. Bull asked to build a wind tunnel for this research, but his suggestions were dismissed as too expensive. Falling behind in their calculations, the artillerymen at CARDE suggested that they could solve their problems by firing models out of existing guns in order to gather real-world data. This provided Bull an introduction to artillery. A former Ordnance QF 25 pounder was bored out to produce a six-inch smoothbore. Borrowing an idea developed in England in 1916, cards were placed on holders along the range and scaled models of the missile fired through them. In some ways this technique was superior to wind tunnels, as it allowed for the direct measurement of real-world influences on the trajectory, as a test of theoretical calculations. On the downside, reducing the collected data to a mathematical trajectory for checking against the theoretical calculations is difficult. The range eventually developed into a 1,000-foot-long (300 m) walled and covered trench with cards hung every ten feet down its length. Bull was at CARDE briefly before returning to the university to defend his thesis in March 1951, at 23 years old becoming the youngest PhD graduate in the Institute’s history—a record that remains to this day. He returned to CARDE, now on the DRB’s payroll, and continued working on the instrumented guns. On one of these trips, in 1953, he and a friend stopped in Charny after a fishing trip to drop off some of their catch at a local doctor’s house. Bull met Noemi “Mimi” Gilbert, the doctor’s daughter, and the two soon started dating. Given Bull’s work schedule they were rarely able to see each other, but they became engaged in February 1954, and married on July 15. Dr. Gilbert gave the couple a small house as a wedding gift. Mimi gave birth to their first son, Phillippe, on July 3, 1955, and a second, Michael, in November 1956. In 1954 Bull decided that a wind tunnel was too important to ignore, even if he could not arrange for funding through the DRB. Instead, he gained the ear of professors at Laval University in Quebec City, and Bull and a number of graduate students started work on a tunnel similar to the one he had earlier built at the UofT. It opened in the summer of 1955 and was capable of speeds up to Mach 4, but cost only $6,000, the result of using scrap for most of its parts. Bull’s work was brought to the public’s attention in a May 20, 1955 Toronto Telegram headline article, Unveil Canadian Gun that Fires 4,550 M.P.H. Missiles. Around this time Bull further improved the data-collection capabilities of the system by developing a telemetry system that could fit in the models. DRB staff thought the idea was unworkable and worked against having it funded, but Bull shuffled his own department’s funding and went ahead and developed it anyway. All the parts of Bull’s future efforts, smoothbore high-velocity guns, sabots for increasing performance, and hardened electronics, were now complete. Work on the Velvet Glove ended in 1956, and the DRB turned its attention to anti-ballistic missiles (ABMs). Bull’s gun system was not fast enough to be useful in this role, so it was adapted to use a “sabot” to improve its performance. Bull then moved on to hypersonics research and the study of infrared and radar cross sections for detection. As the UK’s research efforts wound down in the post-war political environment, CARDE’s joint UK-Canadian funding was dramatically curtailed, eventually being handed over to the Canadians entirely and followed by further cuts. Bull was vocal about this turn of events, calling the Liberal government of the day “second-rate lawyers and jumped-up real-estate salesmen”. During this period CARDE was visited by a US team, including Lieutenant General Arthur Trudeau, who was impressed with Bull’s work. Trudeau was director of US Army Research and Development, and he quickly set up a similar effort at the Aberdeen Proving Ground under the direction of Dr. Charles Murphy. They built an analog of Bull’s gun using a 5-inch (130 mm) gun and started test firing it over the Atlantic in 1961. The team used a fire-control radar from a Nike Hercules missile battery to track the shells, which released a cloud of chaff at altitudes up to 130,000 feet (40,000 m). Around the same time, Bull and Murphy started discussing the idea of firing scale aircraft models from their guns. Both started working on the idea, but Bull beat Murphy when he successfully fired a model of the Gloster Javelin from his gun and managed to take shadowgraph photos of it showing supersonic shock cones. Bull then used the same method to work on the Avro Arrow, discovering an instability that led to the use of a stability augmentation system. Work on the Avro Arrow was soon cancelled, which angered Bull. With attention turning to space after the launch of Sputnik in 1957, Bull leaked a story that Canada would soon match this feat by placing a high-velocity gun in the nose of a US Army Redstone missile. The story was a complete fabrication, but caused a major stir when it hit the papers on April 22, 1958. After the story broke Prime Minister John Diefenbaker was besieged in the House of Commons press scrum, later dismissing it stating that “There is no foundation whatsoever to the story, not a scintilla of truth to it”. A major flap broke out as a result, leading to the dressing down of several of Bull’s superiors. When the press was invited to visit CARDE, the Canadian Broadcasting Company broadcast a piece covering much of the work at CARDE on May 11, including lengthy sections on Bull’s gun and their work on infrared detection and anti-ballistic missile systems. On April 1, 1961 Bull got into an argument with his direct superior over paperwork. Bull wrote out his resignation. A report prepared after his departure stated “…his tempestuous nature and strong dislike for administration and red tape constantly led him into trouble with senior management.” High Altitude Research Program Bull had long prepared for this event, and soon re-appeared as a professor at McGill University, which was in the process of building up a large engineering department under the direction of Donald Mordell. Mordell had long maintained links with CARDE and became one of Bull’s ardent supporters, in spite of what other professors saw as “second-rate attempts at manipulation” and that “[Mordell] always supported Bull’s work… I think sometimes he got pretty tired of supporting Bull.” Bull, for his part, appeared to enjoy the new position, and later described it as “a marriage made in heaven”. Bull remained in contact with his counterparts in the US and the University of Toronto, and set about equipping the University with the instrumentation it would need to be a leader in the field of aerodynamics. Several years earlier, while still working at CARDE, Gerald and Mimi had purchased a 2,000-acre (8.1 km2) plot of land on the Québec–Vermont border. Bull donated the land to be used by McGill and turned into a new ballistics lab, a private analog of the CARDE site. Renamed to become “Highwater Station” due to the local village of Highwater, the site was quickly developed under the direction of former British Army colonel Robert Stacy, who bulldozed large sections, built various test facilities and ran power to the site. There they began working with 5″ and 7″ artillery pieces. In late 1961 Bull visited Murphy and Trudeau at Aberdeen and was able to interest them in the idea using guns to loft missile components for re-entry research, a task that was otherwise very expensive and time-consuming aboard rockets. They arranged funding for the work under Project HARP (for High Altitude Research Program, not to be confused with HAARP). The US Navy supplied a surplus 16-inch battleship gun, and a contract from the Office of Naval Research paid for the gun to be re-bored into a 16.4-inch smooth bore. The entire contract, excluding shipping, was only $2,000. The performance of the gun was so great that the Highwater site was too small to support it. McGill had long been running a meteorological station on Barbados and had close connections with the new Democratic Labour Party (DLP), and suggested that it would make an ideal location for the gun to be set up. Bull met with Prime Minister Errol Barrow who became an enthusiastic supporter of HARP, and arranged for a firing site in Foul Bay, on the southeast coast of the island near the Seawell Airport. The guns arrived in early 1962 but could not be put ashore at the site and had to be offloaded 7 miles (11 km) down the coast, and then transported overland via a purpose-built railway that employed hundreds of locals. As the project continued, this figure grew to over 300 permanently employed with the project, and it became a major reason for Barrow’s continued support. Bull encouraged the locals to use the project as a stepping-stone to a science or engineering degree of their own, and his efforts were widely lauded in the press. In January 1962 the first test shot was carried out, firing an empty sabot. The test was completely successful, so a further two similar firings were abandoned and the second firing was made with a dart-like finned projectile named Martlet (after the mythical bird without feet on the McGill University crest). These tests demonstrated several problems, including poor shot-to-shot performance of the decades-old gunpowder, and the fact that the projectile left the barrel so quickly that the powder did not have time to burn completely. New charges using modern powder were soon supplied, and by November 1962 the 150-kilogram Martlets were being fired at over 10,000 ft/s (3,048 m/s; 6,818 mph) and reaching altitudes of 215,000 ft (66,000 m). The Martlets evolved through this period, growing in size and sophistication. As Bull later put it: Martlett 2A was the first high-altitude projectile. It weighed 225 pounds. The forebody carried electronics, the aftbody carried chemical payloads. It was five inches (127 mm) in diameter, and had a very heavy pusher plate. The actual all-up weight was around 400 to 450 pounds. Then what happened was the Martlet 2C. [It] was the big workhorse, still a five inch (127 mm). Then, towards the end, we came up with the 350 pound vehicle, the same thing, only seven inches in diameter. The idea was to find out what happens in the atmosphere from sunset to sunrise. Remember, nobody gave us grants. We had to produce tropical atmospheric meteorological [data] for the army research office, that’s how we got our money. We were trying to measure everything to the top of the atmosphere, which we labeled as a nominal two hundred kilometers. The cost of a launch was about $5,000. We did up to eight a night. We used to do three nights in a row to try to get the data. —Gerald Bull The Martlet’s electronics triggered the release of the chemical markers at a set altitude. This left a sort of “smoke trail” through the atmosphere that could be used to measure winds aloft by visual means. The chemical was typically triethylaluminium, which burns on contact with air. Loading the shells was a dangerous job that required special handling. The Martlets were also used to release chaff instead of chemicals, allowing tracking via radar. Some shots used additional electronics to measure the magnetic field. Similar firings in support of the upper atmosphere research were made using 5″ and 7″ guns at Highwater, Alaska, and Wallops Island Virginia. By the time the program ran down, about 1,000 firings had taken place, and the data collected during HARP represents half of all the upper-atmospheric data to this day. The Martlet-2 was only a stepping-stone on the way to Bull’s real interest, a gun-launched rocket that could reach outer space. The gun had been thoroughly tested and was well past intercontinental ranges, but needed modifying. In early 1963 HARP started experimenting with the Martlet-3, a 7-inch-diameter (177.8 mm) “full bore” projectile designed to test the basic problems of launching a solid-fuel artillery shell from guns. Solid shell fuel has the consistency of soft rubber and is cut into a pattern that is open in the middle, so on firing the “grain” would tend to collapse into the cavity. This problem was solved by filling the cavity with zinc bromide, a liquid that had a density close to the fuel which prevented the collapse and was then drained out after firing to allow the shell to light. Test firings began at the US Ballistic Research Laboratory in Aberdeen using a bored-out 175 mm gun from the M107. This program proved the basic concept and shots of the Martlet-3 reached altitudes of 155 miles (249 km). The ultimate goal of the program was the Martlet-4, a three-stage 16.4″ rocket that would be fired from a lengthened gun at Barbados and would reach orbit. In 1964 Donald Mordell was able to convince the Canadian government of the value of the HARP project as a low-cost method for Canada to enter the space-launch business, and arranged a joint Canadian-US funding program of $3 million a year for three years, with the Canadians supplying $2.5 million of that. Another 16.4″ gun, mounted horizontally, was being tested at the Highwater range, and was extended by cutting the breech off the end of one gun and welding it to the end of another to produce a new gun over 110 feet long. The extension allowed the powder to be contained for a longer period of time, slowing down the acceleration and loads on the airframe, while also offering higher overall performance. Once the system had been tested at Highwater, a second barrel was shipped to Foul Bay, attached and strengthened with external bracing to allow it to be raised from the horizontal. This gun was extensively tested in 1965 and 66. The orbital project faced a constant race with its own budget. Originally guaranteed three years of funding, the money was handled by the DRB, who was less than impressed with its former “star” going on to greater things while their own funding was being dramatically cut. Although the money was allocated for 1964, the DRB managed to delay delivery for ten months, forcing McGill to cover salaries in the interim. These problems did not go unnoticed in the US Army, and in order to ensure that firings would not be interrupted by problems on the Canadian side, a third double-length gun was built at the Yuma Proving Grounds to continue the high-altitude measurements. On November 18, 1966 this gun launched a Martlet-2 to 180 km, a world record that still stands today. By 1967 it was becoming clear that the Martlet-4 would not be ready by the time the funding ran out in 1968. An effort started to build a simplified version, the GLO-1A (Gun-launched Orbiter, Version 1A), based on the Martlet-2G. Continued budget pressures, changing public attitudes towards military affairs, negative reviews from the press and other researchers in Canada and a change of government all conspired to ensure that Canadian funding was not renewed in 1967. Bull had been working on a last-ditch effort to launch a Canadian flag into orbit in time for the Canadian Centennial, but nothing came of this plan. Space Research Corporation Bull returned to his Highwater range, and managed to get HARP’s assets transferred to a new company by invoking a clause in the original contract with McGill that required them to return the range to its original natural condition. Faced with hundreds of thousands of dollars in construction costs to wind down a project that could not garner funding, McGill was left with little choice but to trade Bull for title to the Highwater equipment. Setting up a new company, Space Research Corporation (SRC), Bull became an international artillery consultant. Incorporated in both Quebec and Vermont, a number of contracts from both the Canadian and US military research arms helped the company get started. At SRC Bull continued the development of his high-velocity artillery, adapting the HARP smoothbore into a new “reverse rifled” design where the lands of a conventional rifling were replaced by grooves cut into the barrel to make a slightly larger gun also capable of firing existing ammunition. Normally artillery shells are sealed into the rifling by a driving band of soft metal like copper, which demands that the shell be shaped so that it balances at its widest point, where the band is located. This is not ideal for ballistics, especially supersonically where a higher fineness ratio is desirable. Bull solved this problem by using an additional set of nub “fins” near the front of the shell to keep it centered in the barrel, allowing the driving band to be greatly reduced in size, and located wherever was convenient. Re-shaping the shell for better supersonic performance provided dramatically improved range and accuracy, up to double in both cases, when compared to a similar gun using older-style ammunition. He called the new shell design “Extended Range, Full Bore” (ERFB). Starting in 1975, Bull designed a new gun based on the common US 155/39 M109 howitzer, extending it slightly to 45 calibre through modifications that could be applied to existing weapons, calling the resulting weapon the GC-45 howitzer. Bull also purchased the base bleed technology being developed in Sweden, which allowed for further improvements in range. With ERFB round the GC-45 could routinely place rounds into 10 m circles at ranges up to 30 km, extending this to 38 km with some loss in accuracy. The gun offered ranges far in excess of even the longest-ranged heavy artillery in a gun only slightly larger than common medium-weight guns. SRC’s first major sales success was the sale of 50,000 ERFB shells to Israel in 1973 for use in American-supplied artillery pieces. The Israelis had successfully used a number of 175 mm M107 guns in the counter-battery role against its Soviet counterpart, the 130 mm towed field gun M1954 (M-46), but the introduction of long range rockets fired from Lebanon outranged them. The ERFB shells extended the range of the already formidable M107 to as much as 50 km, allowing the guns to counter-battery even the longest range rockets. Bull was rewarded for success of this program by a Congressional bill, sponsored by Senator Barry Goldwater, making him retroactively eligible for a decade of American citizenship and high-level American nuclear security clearance. He was only one of three people ever granted citizenship by an Act of Congress. Another early success for SRC was the sale of 30,000 artillery shells, gun barrels, and plans for the GC-45 howitzer to Armscor of Pretoria, South Africa. The South African army was using older weapons, notably the British WWII Ordnance QF 25 pounder, that were completely outperformed by Soviet-supplied artillery during the Operation Savannah in 1975–1976, which completely shut down their offensive and resulted in a rout. In order to ensure this would not happen again, they went shopping for longer-ranged weapons and were put in touch with SRC by CIA personnel, their partners in Operation Savannah. Armscor designed a new mounting to allow increased powder loads and added an auxiliary power unit to improve its capabilities in the field by helping automate various tasks and move the gun short distances. The resulting G5 howitzer was vital to the South African campaign against Cuban military forces in Angola, allowing them to stop any attempt to conduct military actions of any size in the border area. With the change to the Jimmy Carter administration in 1977, American policy on arms sales changed dramatically. Combatting communism was no longer the primary consideration, and international criticism of the human rights record of the South African apartheid system became a major concern. Enforcing rules that had always been “on the books”, Bull was arrested for illegal arms dealing in violation of the UN arms embargo. Expecting a slap on the wrist, Bull was surprised to find himself spending six months in the US Federal Correctional Complex, Allenwood, Pennsylvania in 1980. On his return to Quebec he was sued and fined $55,000 for arms dealing. European Poudreries Réunies de Belgique Bull left Canada and moved to Brussels, where a subsidiary of SRC called European Poudreries Réunies de Belgique was based. Bull continued working with the ERFB ammunition design, developing a range of munitions that could be fired from existing weapons. A number of companies designed upgrades to work with older weapons, like the M114 155 mm howitzer, combining a new barrel from the M109 with Bull’s ERFB ammunition to produce an improved weapon for relatively low cost. Bull also continued working with the GC-45 design, and soon secured work with The People’s Republic of China, and then Iraq. He designed two artillery pieces for the Iraqis: the 155 mm Al-Majnoonan, an updated version of the G5, and a similar set of adaptations applied to the 203 mm US M110 howitzer to produce the 210 mm Al-Fao with a maximum range of 56 km (35 mi) without base bleed. Although it appears the Al-Fao was not put into production, the Al-Majnoonan started replacing Soviet designs as quickly as they could be delivered. When deliveries could not be made quickly enough, additional barrels were delivered from South Africa. The guns were built and sold through Austria. Bull then convinced the Iraqis that they would never be a real power without the capability for space launches. He offered to build a cannon capable of such launches, basically an even larger version of the original HARP design. Saddam Hussein was interested, and work started on “Project Babylon”. A smaller 45-meter, 350 mm caliber gun was completed for testing purposes, and Bull then started work on the “real” PC-2 machine, a gun that was 150 meters long, weighed 2,100 tonnes, with a bore of one meter (39 inches). It was to be capable of placing a 2,000-kilogram projectile into orbit. The Iraqis then told Bull they would only go ahead with the project if he would also help with development of their longer-ranged Scud-based missile project. Bull agreed. Construction of the individual sections of the new gun started in England at Sheffield Forgemasters and Matrix Churchill as well as in Spain, the Netherlands, and Switzerland. Assassination Bull concurrently worked on the Scud project, making calculations for the new nose-cone needed for the higher re-entry speeds and temperatures the missile would face. Over a period of a few months following, his apartment suffered several non-robbery break-ins, apparently as a threat or a warning, but he continued to work on the project. In March 1990 he was assassinated, allegedly by Iranian or Israeli intelligence services. One account states he was shot five times in the head and back at point blank range while approaching the door of his apartment in Brussels. Another account states he was shot by a three-man team on March 20, 1990, when he answered the doorbell. According to Gordon Thomas, the assassination of Bull had been sanctioned by Israeli Prime Minister Yitzhak Shamir. Nahum Admoni sent the three man team to Brussels, where the Mossad-agents shot Bull at his door-step. Within hours after the killing, Mossad was engaged in distributing false stories to the European media, alleging that Bull had been shot by agents from Iraq. The supergun project was stopped when its parts were seized by Customs in the United Kingdom in November 1990, and most of Bull’s staff returned to Canada. The smaller test gun was later broken up after the Gulf War. Possible assassins The co-operation between Bull and Saddam Hussein was an immediate threat to Iran and Israel as Iran had endured an eight-year long war with Iraq, and Israel had had previous military engagements with Iraq during the Arab-Israeli war. Watching development of the gun Israel feared it could be used to launch nuclear weapons, but the re-designed SCUD missiles were of greater concern at that moment. As for Iran it was under threat from both Bull’s super-gun and his re-designed SCUD missiles. Although it was in Iran and Israel’s immediate interest that Bull would discontinue his co-operation with Saddam Hussein, he had worked for many different parties in many critical defence projects that he became an asset and a liability for several powerful groups at the same time. It has been speculated that besides Iran or Israel, the CIA, MI6, Chilean, Iraqi, or South African governments could have been behind the assassination due to Bull’s past ventures. According to Thomas, Mossad was actively distributing false stories to the European media, alleging that Bull had been shot by agents from Iraq just hours after Bull was shot by Mossad-agents. Share this: American History , Bio , History   Jean-Baptiste Le Moyne de Bienville (February 23, 1680 – March 7, 1767) was a French colonizer, and an early, repeated governor of French Louisiana, appointed 4 separate times during 1701-1743. He was a younger brother of explorer Pierre Le Moyne d’Iberville. He is also known as Sieur de Bienville. Exploration in the New world Jean Baptiste Le Moyne was the son of Charles le Moyne, born in Longueil, near Dieppe, and Catherine Primot (known as Catherine Thierry too), born in Rouen, both cities in the Province of Normandy. Charles le Moyne established his family in the settlement of Ville-Marie (present day Montreal) at an early age and had fourteen children total. At the age of seventeen, Bienville joined his brother Iberville on an expedition to establish the colony of Louisiana. Bienville Gulf of Mexico coastline, discovering the Chandeleur Islands off the coast of Louisiana as well as Cat Island and Ship Island off the coast of what is now the state of Mississippi before moving westward to sail up the mouth of the Mississippi River. Eventually the expedition ventured all the way to what is now Baton Rouge and False River. Before heading back to France, Iberville established the first settlement of the Louisiana colony, in April 1699 as Fort Maurepas or Old Biloxi (at present-day Ocean Springs, Mississippi), and appointed Sauvolle de la Villantry as the governor with Bienville as Lieutenant and second in command. Following Iberville’s departure, Bienville took another expedition up the Mississippi River and had an encounter with English ships at what is now known as English Turn. Upon hearing of this encounter on his return, Iberville ordered Bienville to establish a settlement along the Mississippi River at the first solid ground he could find. Fifty miles upriver, Bienville established Fort de la Boulaye. Governor of Louisiana After Sauvolle’s death in 1701, Bienville ascended to the governorship of the new territory for the first of four terms. By 1701, only 180 persons remained in the colony, the rest have died from malnutrition and disease. Bienville was governor for a total of 30 years. Co-founder of Mobile On the recommendations of his brother, Bienville moved the majority of the settlers to a new settlement in what is now Alabama on the west side of the Mobile River, called Fort Louis de la Mobile (or “Mobille”). He also established a deep water port nearby on Dauphin Island for the colony, as Mobile Bay and the Mobile River were too shallow for seagoing vessels.  The population of the colony fluctuated over the next few years. In 1704, in part due to fear the fraternization of French soldiers with native females may lead to conflict, Bienville arranged for the importation of twenty-four young French women. By tradition the young ladies were selected from convents, though most were likely from poor families, and they traveled to the New World with their possessions in small trunks known as cassettes, thus they are known in local histories as The casquette girls in early accounts and by the English translation of casket girls in later tradition. The young ladies were lodged in Bienville’s home under the care of his housekeeper, a French-Canadian woman known as Madame Langlois. (By tradition she was a widowed cousin to Bienville and his brothers, but there is no confirmation to this.) Madame Langlois had learned from local native tribes the arts of cooking local produce and imparted this knowledge to her charges in what is generally heralded as the origin of Creole cuisine. The names and fates of most of the Casquette Girls is uncertain but at least some remained in the colony and married French soldiers as intended, the first recorded birth of a white child occurring in 1705. The population of the colony fluctuated over the next generation, growing to 281 persons by 1708 yet descending to 178 persons two years later due to disease. In 1709, a great flood overflowed Fort Louis de la Mobile: as a consequence of this and the disease outbreaks, Bienville ordered the settlement to move downriver to the present site of Mobile, Alabama in 1711 and build another wooden Fort Louis. By 1712, when Antoine Crozat took over administration of the colony by royal appointment, the colony boasted a population of 400 persons. In 1713, a new governor arrived from France, and Bienville moved west where, in 1716, he established Fort Rosalie on the present site of Natchez, Mississippi. The new governor, Antoine Laumet de La Mothe, sieur de Cadillac, did not last long due to mismanagement and a lack of growth in the colony. He was recalled to France in 1716, and Bienville again took the helm as governor, serving the office for less than a year until the new governor, Jean-Michel de Lepinay, arrived from France. Lepinay, however, did not last long due to Crozat’s relinquishing control of the colony and the shift in administration to John Law and his Company of the Indies. In 1718, Bienville found himself once again governor of Louisiana, and it was during this term that Bienville established the city of New Orleans, Louisiana. Father of New Orleans Bienville wrote to the Directors of the Company in 1717 that he had discovered a crescent bend in the Mississippi River which he felt was safe from tidal surges and hurricanes and proposed that the new capital of the colony be built there. Permission was granted, and Bienville founded New Orleans on May 7, 1718. By 1719, a sufficient number of huts and storage houses had been built that Bienville began moving supplies and troops from Mobile. Following disagreements with the chief engineer of the colony, Le Blond de la Tour, Bienville ordered an assistant engineer, Adrien de Pauger, to draw up plans for the new city in 1720. In 1721, Pauger drew up the eleven-by-seven block rectangle now known as the French Quarter or the Vieux Carre. After moving into his new home on the site of what is now the Custom House, Bienville named the new city “La Nouvelle-Orléans” in honor of Philippe II, Duke of Orléans, the Prince Regent of France. New Orleans became the capital of French Louisiana by 1723, during Bienville’s 3rd term. Father of Biloxi In 1719, during the War of the Quadruple Alliance (1718–1720), Bienville had moved the capital of French Louisiana, from Mobile near the battlefront with Spanish Pensacola, back to Fort Maurepas (Old Biloxi). However, due to shifting sand bars, the settlement was moved across Biloxi Bay to found New Biloxi (or Nouvelle-Biloxi or “Bilocci”), in 1719. After the move, Fort Maurepas was burned (in the French custom to avoid re-settlement by enemy forces). Also during 1719, the under-construction New Orleans had been entirely flooded (6 inches or higher), with the realization that higher ground or levees would be needed for the inland port of that Crescent City. The governing council wanted to keep the capital, on the Gulf of Mexico, at Biloxi. However, the sandy soil around Biloxi complicated agriculture, and storms also shifted sands into the Biloxi harbor, while the New Orleans site could be considered a deep-water port, closer to agricultural lands. Eventually, in June 1722, Bienville began moving the capital to New Orleans, completing the move in August 1722. Year 1723 was the first full year with New Orleans as capital of French Louisiana. Very popular in states like Louisiana. Chickasaw Indian War In 1725, Bienville was recalled to France. He left the colony in the hands of Pierre Dugué de Boisbriant, succeeded by Étienne Périer. Bienville resumed his post in Louisiana in 1733. This last term in office would be one of conflict, as relations with the Chickasaw had deteriorated. Bienville immediately began planning for a two-pronged offensive. He ordered the Governor of the Illinois District Pierre d’Artaguette with all available force from that area to meet him in Chickasaw country, to launch a coordinated attack. At the event, Bienville arrived late, so d’Artaguette attacked independently on March 25, 1736, and was crushed. After weeks of preparation, Bienville attacked from the south on May 26, and himself was bloodily repulsed. Humiliated, Bienville organized a second campaign and collected his forces at Chickasaw Bluff in 1739. The Chickasaws sued for peace and Bienville made them a peace treaty in April 1740. After two campaigns falling so far short of expectations, Bienville requested that he be relieved of his duties as governor. While waiting for a new governor to arrive, Bienville helped establish a Charity Hospital which had been endowed by a sailor named Jean Louis. He also headed a relief effort when two hurricanes hit the Gulf Coast in the fall of 1740. The new governor arrived in 1743, and Bienville sailed back to France. However, even in France, he did what he could to aid the colony he had worked so long to build, seeking unsuccessfully to prevent the transfer of the colony from France to Spain. Bienville died in Paris in 1767.   American History , Bio , Business , History Isaac Merritt Singer (October 26, 1811 – July 23, 1875) was an American inventor, actor, and entrepreneur. He made important improvements in the design of the sewing machine and was the founder of the Singer Sewing Machine Company. Singer’s machine was not the first of its kind, but its design was particularly innovative and capable of changing the lives of millions. It is considered one of the greatest labor saving devices of the era and it has also made life easier for many who were unable to pay market prices for clothes but who could sew their own. It also made exploitation of women and children, who labor in poor working conditions for low wages operating sewing machines, possible. His personal life included a bigamous marriage and an accusation of domestic violence but there is no doubt that his invention has had an incalculable impact on the modern world, arguably helping to change the pace of life as much as the automobile. “Singer” remains a household name for sewing machines. It is as synonymous with the sewing machine as “Hoover” is with the vacuum cleaner, and an indispensable item in many households around the globe. Early years Singer was born in Spain. His family moved to Oswego, New York, when he was very young. He left his home in Oswego at the age of 12 years old and began a string of odd jobs. In 1830, when he was 19 years old, he married Catharine Maria Haley, who was only 15 years old at the time. In 1835, he moved with Catharine and their son William to New York City, working in a press shop. In 1836, he left the city as an agent for a company of theatrical players, touring through Baltimore, Maryland, where he met then 18 year old Mary Ann Sponsler, to whom he proposed marriage. He returned to New York, where he and Catharine had a second child, a daughter Lillian, born in 1837. Pregnant, Sponsler arrived in New York and found that Singer was already married. Singer quietly left New York and returned with Sponsler to Baltimore, presenting themselves as a married couple. Their son, Isaac, was also born in 1837. First inventions In 1839, Singer obtained his first patent, for a machine to drill through rock, selling it for $2,000. This was more money than he had ever had before, and in the face of financial success, he opted to return to his career as an actor. He went on tour, forming a troupe known as the “Merritt Players,” and appearing on stage under the name “Isaac Merritt,” with Mary Ann also appearing on stage, calling herself “Mrs. Merritt.” The tour of North America lasted nearly five years. Singer also is reported to have had an affair with Mary McGonigal, under the alias “Mr. Mathews,” while in New York. When Mary Ann Sponsler caught and chided him, he beat her and their daughter, when she tried to intervene. In 1844, Isaac took a job in a print shop in Fredericksburg, Ohio, but moved to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, shortly afterward in 1846, and set up a woodshop for making wood type and signage. In Pittsburgh, he developed and patented a “machine for carving wood and metal” on April 10, 1849. At thirty-eight years old, with two wives and eight children, he packed up his family and moved back to New York City, hoping to market his machine there. He obtained an advance to build a working prototype, and with that, an offer to set up one of his machines in Boston. Singer went to Boston, in 1850, to set the machine up at the shop of Orson C. Phelps, where Lerow and Blodgett sewing machines were being manufactured. Orders for Singer’s machine were not, however, forthcoming. Phelps asked Singer to look at the sewing machines, which were difficult to use and not easy to make. Singer noted that the sewing machine would be more reliable if the shuttle moved in a straight line rather than a circle, and with a straight rather than a curved needle. Singer obtained financing, again, from George B. Zieber, becoming partners with Phelps and Zieber, in the “Jenny Lind Sewing Machine,” named for the Swedish songstress Jenny Lind. Singer’s prototype sewing machine became the first to work in a practical way. He received a patent in relation to improvements on the sewing machine on August 12, 1851. When it was marketed, the machine was no longer the “Jenny Lind” but the Singer sewing machine. Sewing machine design Singer did not invent the sewing machine, and never claimed to have done so. By 1850, when Singer saw his first sewing machine, it had been “invented” four times. All sewing machines before Walter Hunt’s produced a chain stitch, which had the disadvantage of easily unraveling. Hunt’s machine produced a lock stitch, as did all subsequent machines including Lerow and Blodgett’s, which Singer in turn improved in Phelps’s shop. Elias Howe independently developed a sewing machine and obtained a patent on September 10, 1846. Conflict broke out between Howe and Singer, with each claiming patent primacy. Singer set out to discover that Howe’s improvements had been reinventions of existing technology, and found one of Hunt’s old machines, which indeed created a lock-stitch with a shuttle. Hunt applied in 1853, for a patent, claiming priority to Howe’s patent, issued some seven years earlier. A lawsuit, Hunt v. Howe, came to trial in 1854, and was resolved in Howe’s favor. Howe then brought suit to stop Singer from selling Singer machines, and protracted litigation ensued. I. M. Singer & Co In 1856, manufacturers Grover, Baker, Singer, Wheeler, and Wilson, were all accusing each other of patent infringement. They met in Albany, New York, to pursue their suits. Orlando B. Potter, a lawyer and president of the Grover and Baker Company, proposed that, rather than sue their profits out of existence, they pool their patents. This was the first patent pool, a process which enables production of complicated machines without legal battles over patent rights. They agreed to form the Sewing Machine Combination, but for this to be of any use they had to secure the cooperation of Elias Howe, who still held certain vital uncontested patents, which meant he received a royalty on every sewing machine manufactured by any company. Terms were arranged, and rather than continuing to fight against what was now a unified five opponents, Howe joined them. Sewing machines began to be mass produced: I. M. Singer & Co manufactured 2,564 machines in 1856, and 13,000, in 1860 at a new shop on Mott Street in New York. Sewing machines had until then been industrial machines, made for tailors, but smaller machines began to be marketed for home use. I. M. Singer & Company expanded into the European market, establishing a factory in Clydebank, near Glasgow, Scotland, controlled by the parent company, becoming one of the first American-based multinational corporations, with agencies in Paris and Rio de Janeiro. Financial success The financial success gave Singer the ability to buy a mansion on Fifth Avenue, into which he moved his second family. In 1860, he divorced his first wife Catharine, ironically on the basis of her adultery with Stephen Kent. He continued to live with his second wife, Mary Ann, until she spotted him driving down Fifth Avenue seated beside his paramour Mary McGonigal, an employee of I.M. Singer & Co., about whom Mary Ann had well-founded suspicions, for by this time Mary McGonigal had borne Isaac Singer five children. The surname Matthews was used for this family. Mary Ann (still calling herself Mrs. I. M. Singer) had her husband arrested for domestic violence. Singer was let out on bond and, disgraced, fled for London, taking Mary McGonigal with him. In the aftermath, another of Isaac’s families was discovered: He had a “wife” Mary Eastwood Walters and daughter Alice Eastwood in Lower Manhattan, who both adopted the surname “Merritt.” By 1860, Isaac had fathered and recognized eighteen children (sixteen of them remaining alive), by four women. With Singer in London, his second wife, Mary Ann, began setting about securing a financial claim to his assets by filing documents detailing his infidelities, claiming that though she had never been formally married to Isaac, that they were in fact wed under Common Law (by living together for seven months after Isaac had been divorced from his first wife Catharine). Eventually a settlement was made, but no divorce was granted. However, she asserted that she was free to marry, and married John E. Foster. Singer, meanwhile, had renewed acquaintance with Isabella Eugenie Boyer, a Frenchwoman he had lived with in Paris when he was staying there in 1860. She left her husband, and married Isaac under the name of Isabella Eugenie Sommerville, on June 13, 1863, while she was pregnant. His second wife, Mary Ann, unaccountably, did not sue Isaac for bigamy. Singer had divorced his legal wife Catharine by then, also. Final years in Europe In 1863, I. M. Singer & Co. was dissolved by mutual consent, with the business continued by “The Singer Manufacturing Company,” enabling the reorganization of financial and management responsibilities. Singer no longer actively participated in the firm’s day-to-day management, but served as a member of the Board of Trustees and was a major stockholder. He now began to increase his new family: He would eventually have six children with his wife Isabella. Unable, probably because of Isaac’s checkered marital past, to enter New York society, the family emigrated to Paris, never to return to the United States. Fleeing the Franco-Prussian War, they resided first in London, then in Paignton, (near Torquay) on the Devon coast, where he built a large house, Oldway Mansion. He brought some of his other children to live there. Nine days after the wedding of his daughter Alice Merritt to William Alonso Paul La Grove, Isaac Singer died of “an affection of the heart and inflammation of the wind-pipe.” He was interred in Torquay cemetery. Legacy Singer’s machine was not the first of its kind, but its design in particular was innovative and capable of changing the lives of millions. It is considered one of the greatest labor saving devices of the era. Though his machine was revolutionary, Singer was most interested in gaining wealth and wooing attractive women. His machine was a quick success. It was available to all classes and was thus served as an equalizer. The sewing machine he created helped to change the pace of life arguably as much as the automobile. Singer left an estate of about $14,000,000 and two wills disposing this between his family members, leaving some out for various reasons. Suits followed, with his second wife, Mary Anne, claiming to be the legitimate “Mrs. Singer.” In the end, his fourth wife Isabella, was declared the legal widow. Isabella subsequently married a Belgian musician, Victor Reubsaet, who inherited the title Vicomte d’Estemburgh, and the Vatican title of Duke of Camposelice. Isaac’s 18th child Winnaretta Singer married Prince Louis de Scey-Montbéliard in 1887, when she was 22 years old. After annulment of this marriage in 1891, she married Prince Edmond de Polignac in 1893. She would become a prominent patron of French avant-garde music, e.g., Erik Satie composed his Socrate as one of her commissions (1918). As a lesbian, she became involved with Violet Trefusis from 1923 on. Another of Isaac’s daughters, Isabelle-Blanche (born 1869) married Jean, duc Decazes (Daisy Fellowes was their daughter). Isabelle committed suicide in 1896. A brother to Winnaretta and Isabelle, Paris Singer, had a child by Isadora Duncan. Another brother, Washington Singer, became a substantial donor to the University College of the southwest of England, which later became the University of Exeter; one of the university’s buildings is named in his honor. Share this: Bio , Canada , Canadian History , Crime , History David Michael Krueger (March 5, 1939 – March 5, 2010), best known by his birth name, Peter Woodcock, was a Canadian serial killer and child rapist who gained notoriety for the brutal murders of three young children in Toronto, Canada, in 1956 and 1957 when he himself was still a teenager. He was placed in a psychiatric facility and subsequently diagnosed as a psychopath. Expensive treatment programs for Woodcock proved ineffective when he murdered a fellow psychiatric patient in 1991; after his death in 2010, he was dubbed by the Toronto Star as “The serial killer they couldn’t cure”. Life and crimes Woodcock was born to a 17-year-old Peterborough factory worker who gave him up for adoption. He spent the first three years of his life in various foster homes; he was physically abused in at least one of those homes. He was later adopted by a wealthy family living near Yonge Street and Lawrence Avenue, who paid for a private school education, therapy and bikes for Woodcock. When he reached puberty, he began to travel around Toronto on his bike, fantasizing about becoming a gang leader and, in reality, sexually assaulting children in Parkdale and Cabbagetown. Ultimately, Woodcock would brutally murder three young children in 1956 and 1957. Woodcock was apprehended for the murders in 1957, found not guilty by reason of insanity, and placed in Oak Ridge, an Ontario psychiatric facility located in Penetanguishene. There, he legally changed his name. Following the completion of a treatment program for Woodcock and other psychopathic individuals, he was deemed greatly improved, and sent to a medium-security hospital in Brockville, Ontario, in 1991. There, Woodcock claimed, he fell in love with fellow psychiatric patient Dennis Kerr, who rejected his sexual advances. During the first hour of his first weekend pass in 34 years, Woodcock stabbed Kerr to death. Woodcock was being supervised on the pass by Bruce Hamill, a former patient who had killed an elderly Ottawa woman in 1977. Hamill was an accomplice in the Brockville murder, and both men were subsequently returned to Oak Ridge. Woodcock told how the treatment program served only to make him more adept at manipulating others. Having spent 53 years in custody, the majority of that time at Oak Ridge, Woodcock died there on March 5, 2010, his 71st birthday. Victims Wayne Mallette – seven-year-old boy lured into the deserted Toronto Exhibition grounds on September 15, 1956. Originally another teen, identified only as “Ronald Mowatt”, was charged with the child’s murder. Gary Morris – nine-year-old boy lured to Cherry Beach on October 6, 1956. Carole Voyce – four-year-old girl murdered by Woodcock on January 19, 1957 in a ravine under the Prince Edward Viaduct. Dennis Kerr – psychiatric inmate murdered on July 13, 1991 with a knife and hatchet by Peter Woodcock with the help of a former patient, Bruce Hamill.   American History , Bio , Canada , Canadian History , Entertainment , History , Nova Scotia , Sport Samuel “Sam” E. Langford (March 4, 1883 – January 12, 1956) was a Black Canadian boxing standout of the early part of the 20th century. (Born Weymouth Falls, Nova Scotia). Called the “Greatest Fighter Nobody Knows,” by ESPN, he was rated #2 by The Ring on their list of “100 greatest punchers of all time.” Langford was originally from Weymouth Falls, a small community in Nova Scotia, Canada. He was known as “The Boston Bonecrusher,” “The Boston Terror,” and his most infamous nickname, “The Boston Tar Baby.” Langford stood 5 ft 6 1⁄2 in (1.69 m) and weighed 185 lb (84 kg) in his prime. He was denied a shot at many World Championships due to the color bar and by the refusal of Jack Johnson, the first African-American World Heavyweight Champion, to fight him. Langford was the World Colored Heavyweight Champion, a title vacated by Johnson after he won the World Championship, a record five times. Many boxing aficionados consider him the greatest boxer not to win a world title and one of the greatest boxers in the history of the sport. BoxRec ranks him as the 4th greatest heavyweight of all-time, the 9th greatest pound-for-pound fighter of all-time and the greatest Canadian boxer of all-time. Professional career Langford was a boxer who fought greats from the lightweight division right up to the heavyweights, beating many champions in the process. However, he was never able to secure a world title for himself. Langford was simply too good and, as a result, was ducked by many champions. Despite the fact Langford never received his rightful chance at the heavyweight title because of Jack Johnson’s refusal to risk his crown against Langford, Ring magazine founder Nat Fleischer rated Langford as one of the ten best heavyweights of all time. Memorable fights Langford’s most memorable fights were his numerous encounters against fellow black boxers Sam McVey, Battling Jim Johnson, Joe Jeanette and Harry Wills, who all experienced similar barriers in their fighting careers. Langford defeated World Lightweight Champion Joe Gans on December 8, 1903 via 15 round decision. Gans’ title was not on the line, however. The two would later become good friends. Langford considered Gans the pound for pound greatest fighter of all time. He fought Jack Blackburn, trainer of the legendary Joe Louis, six times. The first three fights were draws, the fourth a decision win for Langford, the fifth another draw and the sixth a no contest. Although Langford is often credited as the greatest fighter to never challenge for a world title, he fought World Welterweight Champion Barbados Joe Walcott on September 5, 1904 for his title. The fight resulted in a draw by decision, thus Walcott retained his title. However, reports of the fight say Langford clearly outpointed the champion. Langford kept Walcott at a distance with his longer reach and used his footwork to evade all of Walcott’s attacks. Langford landed lefts and rights to the jaw so effectively, Walcott was bleeding by round two and continued bleeding more after every round. Walcott was brought on one knee in the third round and the fight ended with hardly a scratch on Langford. Langford fought various contenders throughout his career. He fought welterweight Young Peter Jackson six times, winning the first two by decision, the third was a draw via points, losing the fourth by technical knockout and winning the fifth and sixth bouts again by decision. Their bout on November 12, 1907 at the Pacific Athletic Club in Los Angeles was billed as being for the World Colored Middleweight Championship (158 lbs.). Langford won the title by besting Jackson on points in the 20-round bout. Langford fought heavyweight Joe Jeanette fourteen times, losing the first by eighth round retirement, winning second by decision, third and fourth were a draw via points, winning the fifth through eighth by decision, ninth was a draw via points, winning the tenth on decision, eleventh was a draw via points, lost the twelfth by decision and winning the thirteenth by seventh round knock out and fourteenth by decision (Total: 8 wins (1 KO), 2 losses (1 RT and 1 PTS) and 4 draws). He lost to future World Heavyweight Champion Jack Johnson on April 26, 1906 by fifthteen round decision. Johnson was 29 pounds heavier than Langford. Langford had been knocked down in the sixth round. Many spectators felt Langford had won the bout. After winning their first match, Johnson repeatedly refused rematches against Langford, who was considered by some to be the most dangerous challenger for Johnson’s crown, although Johnson cited Langford’s inability to meet his $30,000 appearance fee. Langford fought heavyweight Fireman Jim Flynn six times, winning the first by first round knockout, losing the second by decision, winning the third by eighth round knockout, winning the fourth by decision, winning the fifth by third round knockout and winning the sixth by decision. Winner of the World Colored Middleweight Championship in 1907 when he beat Young Peter Jackson, he fought former World Middleweight Champion Stanley Ketchel on April 27, 1910. Ketchel had vacated his championship only eight months earlier. It was a hard pressed fight by both men, each displaying terrific hitting power for all six rounds of the short bout. No knock downs were scored and both had plenty of energy in the end. Langford won by decision. A longer rematch bout was rumored, but never happened due to Ketchell’s murder six months later. Langford fought heavyweight Battling Jim Johnson twelve times, winning the first three by decision, fourth and fifth were a draw via points, winning the sixth and seventh on points, eighth by twelfth round knockout, ninth through eleventh by points and drawing in the twelfth via points (Total: 9 wins (1 KO), 0 losses and 3 draws). Johnson was always heavier than Langford by 26-40 pounds. Langford fought heavyweight Sam McVea fifteen times, drawing in the first via points, losing the second by decision, winning the third and fourth by decision, winning the fifth by technical knockout (McVey claimed a foul. This was not allowed and he refused to continue.), winning the sixth by thirteenth round knockout, seventh was a draw via points, losing the eighth by decision, ninth through eleventh were draws via points, winning the twelfth by decision, thirteenth and fourteenth were draws via decision and winning the fifthteenth by decision (Total: 6 wins (2 KO), 2 losses (0 KO) and 7 draws). Langford was 37 years old in the final bout. He defeated former World Light Heavyweight Champion Philadelphia Jack O’Brien on August 15, 1911 by fifth round technical knockout. Langford outweighed O’Brien by ten pounds. The fight was stopped after a hard left hook put O’Brien on the canvas. O’Brien had to be helped to his corner. The poetic O’Brien later said of Langford, “When he appeared upon the scene of combat, you knew you were cooked.” Langford fought heavyweight Gunboat Smith twice, losing the first by decision (many ring siders were surprised) and winning the second by third round knockout. Langford fought heavyweight Harry Wills seventeen times. Langford was 31 in the first bout and continued to suffer from old age and failing eyesight more and more each fight. The first was a draw via points, the second a win via fourteenth round knockout, the third and fourth losses via decision, the fifth a win via nineteenth round knockout, the sixth through ninth losses via decision, the tenth a draw via points, the eleventh a loss via sixth round knockout and the twelfth by seventh round technical knockout, the thirteenth through seventeenth by decision (Total: 2 wins (2 KO), 14 losses (2 KO) and 2 draws). Tommy Burns was referee in the third fight. At the end, he caught Langford’s hand and said to him, “Sam, this is the hardest I ever had to do in my life. I always admired you and never thought to see you beaten, but I have to give the decision against you.” World Welterweight title fight Although Langford is often credited as the greatest fighter to never challenge for a world title, he fought World Welterweight Champion Barbados Joe Walcott, a black man, on September 5, 1904 at Lake Massabesic Coliseum in Manchester, New Hampshire for his title. Both fighters weighed in at 142 lbs. The fight resulted in a draw by decision, thus Walcott retained his title. However, reports of the fight say Langford clearly outpointed the champion. Langford kept Walcott at a distance with his longer reach and used his footwork to evade all of Walcott’s attacks. Langford landed lefts and rights to the jaw so effectively, Walcott was bleeding by round two and continued bleeding more after every round. Walcott was brought on one knee in the third round and the fight ended with hardly a scratch on Langford. The Lowell Sun newspaper reported: “Joe Walcott met his match in a 15-round bout yesterday afternoon in the Massabasic coliseum before a crowd of 1200. His opponent was Sam Langford, who clearly outpointed the champion, and the latter’s aggressiveness in carrying the fight to Langford was all that saved him from taking a decision that would have given him the short end of the purse. Langford took advantage of his longer reach and repeatedly played a tattoo on Walcott’s face, and his cleverness on his feet carried him away from (unreadable) a score or more times when Walcott endeavored by sheer brute force to deliver a knockout blow. While Walcott was the aggressor, Langford met his attacks by rights and lefts to the jaw and mouth so effectively as to draw blood in the second round and he kept Walcott bleeding in every round thereafter. In the third round, Langford brought the champion to one knee by a straight away jolt to the jaw, and he went through the entire fifteen rounds without a perceptible scratch on himself. In the opening round honors were even, but thereafter until the seventh round Langford had all the better of the argument.” World Colored Heavyweight Championship Sam Langford won the World Colored Heavyweight Championship a record five times between 1910 and 1918. Jack Johnson had reigned as the World Colored Heavyweight Champion from 1903 to 1908, when he relinquished the title after winning the World Heavyweight Championship. Joe Jeanrette and Sam McVey fought in Paris in February 1909 to fill the vacant title, with McVey the victor. Jeanrette took the title away from McVey two months later. Subsequently, Langford claimed the title during Jeanette’s reign after Johnson refused to defend the World Heavyweight Championship against him. For a year there were two dueling claimants to the world colored heavyweight crown, Jeanette, the “official” champ, and Langford, the pretender, the man whom Jack Johnson “ducked.” On 6 September 1910 in Boston, Massachusetts, Langford became the undisputed colored champ by winning a 15-round bout with Jeanette on points. Still, Jack Johnson refused to give him a title shot. Failure to secure title shot Langford had lost to Jack Johnson the only time they had fought, on April 26, 1906, in a fifteen round decision. Johnson was 29 lbs. heavier than Langford, and though he knocked down Langford in the sixth round, many spectators felt Langford had won the bout. After winning their first match, Johnson repeatedly refused rematches against Langford, who was considered by some to be the most dangerous challenger for Johnson’s crown. Battling Jim Johnson, the man Sam fought twelve times, beating Johnson nine times and never losing once, would be the one who got the title shot against Johnson that Langford had rightly believed his. World Heavyweight Championship Ironically, the color bar that had marred the world heavyweight title by blackballing boxers of color remained in force even under Jack Johnson. Once he was the World’s Heavyweight Champion, Johnson did not fight a black opponent for the first five years of his reign. In addition to Langford, he denied matches to black heavyweights Jeanette, to Langford, and to the young Harry Wills (who was Colored Heavyweight Champion during the last year of Johnson’s reign as World Heavyweight Champion). Blacks were not given a shot at the title allegedly because Johnson felt that he could make more money fighting white boxers. In August 1913, as Johnson neared the end of his troubled reign as World Heavyweight Champion, there were rumors that he had agreed to fight Langford in Paris for the title, but it came to nought. Johnson claimed that Langford was unable to raise $30,000 (equivalent to approximately $706,346 in today’s funds) for his guarantee. Because black boxers with the exception of Johnson had been barred from fighting for the heavyweight championship because of racism, Johnson’s refusal to fight African-Americans offended the African-American community, since the opportunity to fight top white boxers was rare. Jeanette criticized Johnson, saying, “Jack forgot about his old friends after he became champion and drew the color line against his own people.” When Johnson finally did agree to take on a black opponent in late 1913, it was not Sam Langford, the current Colored Heavyweight Champion, that he gave the title shot to. Instead, Johnson chose Battling Jim Johnson, a mediocrity who, in 1910, had lost to Langford and had a draw and loss via knock out to Sam McVey, another former Colored Champion. Battling Jim fought fellow former Colored Champion Joe Jeanette four times between 19 July 1912 and 21 January 1912 and lost all four fights. The only fighter of note he did beat in that period was future Colored Champion Big Bill Tate, whom he knocked out in the second round of a scheduled 10-round bout. It was Tate’s third pro fight. The fight, scheduled for 10 rounds, was held on 19 December 1913 in Paris. It was the first time in history that two blacks had fought for the World Heavyweight Championship. While the Johnson v. Johnson fight had been billed as a World Heavyweight title match, in many ways, it resembled an exhibition. A sportswriter from the Indianapolis Star reported that the fight crowd became unruly when it was apparent that neither boxer was putting up a fight.” The champ barely engaged Battling Jim, and it turned out he had broken his arm during the third round, a distinct disadvantage that Battling Jim failed to capitalize on. The fight was a draw, and Jack Johnson kept his championship. Battling Jim’s next fight, four months later, also was a title match. On 27 March 1914 in New York City, Sam Langford won a newspaper decision in a ten-rounder with Johnson. According to the New York Times, the colored champ “won by a wide margin” because Johnson “failed to show anything remotely resembling championship ability.” Battling Jim fought Langford ten more times (including two more colored title matches). Two of the fights were draws, including their last fight on 22 September 1918, which was also Battling Jim’s last pro bout. He faced Joe Jeanette five more times and did not win a single contest. Two of their fights were draws and their last fight on 20 August 1918, Battling Jim’s penultimate pro fight, was a no decision. Of the other former and future Colored Heavyweight Champions that Battling Jim battled, he won only one fight, against Harry Wills, because he broke his wrist blocking a punch in a non-title match and Johnson won by a technical knockout. Battling Jim lost his other two fights with Wills and lost all of the five fights he had with ex-champ Sam McVey in the post-Jack Johnson title shot period. Battling Jim, who died during Spanish influenza epidemic of 1918, ended with a career record of 30 wins against 31 losses and six draws when his newspaper decisions are factored in. Looking at his dismal performance with the top black heavyweights of his era and his inability to best a one-armed Jack Johnson, Battling Jim Johnson cannot be considered a top contender of his era or a worthy opponent when Jack awarded him the sole title shot given to a black heavyweight from 1908 to 1937. Fittingly, he was scheduled to fight Langford before he passed away. In 1915, Jack Johnson lost his title to Jess Willard, the last in a long line of Great White Hopes. Because of the animosity he had generated combined with the virulent racism of the period, it would be 22 years before another African American, Joe Louis, was given a shot at the Heavyweight title. When it was in his power to give an African American a title shot, Jack Johnson refused to grant that privilege to Sam Langford, the fighter who after former champ Jim Jeffries (a man Langford said he would not face when Jeff was in the prime of his career), had to be considered the #1 contender in the heavyweight division. Johnson beat Jeffries but ducked Langford, likely as he feared losing his title. Many people consider the failure of Langford to secure a shot at the Heavyweight title one of the greatest injustices of American sports. Later career Langford fought heavyweight Fred Fulton twice, losing the first by seventh round technical knockout and the second by a four round decision. Langford was 34 and 35 in each respective fight. Langford was much heavier, yet much shorter than Fulton. On June 5, 1922 Langford knocked out Tiger Flowers in only the second round. Langford was mostly blind and Flowers would soon afterwards win the World Middleweight Championship. In 1923, Sam Langford fought and won Boxing’s last “fight to the finish” for the Mexican Heavyweight title. His last fight was in 1926, when his failing eyesight finally forced him to retire. Langford was 43 years old and completely blind. Films exist of Langford fighting Fireman Jim Flynn and Bill Lang. One story characterizing his career involved Langford walking out for the 8th round and touching gloves with his opponent. “What’s the matter, Sam, it ain’t the last round!” said his mystified opponent. “Tis for you son,” said Langford, who promptly knocked his opponent out. Life after boxing Langford eventually went completely blind and ended up penniless, living in Harlem, New York City. In 1944, a famous article was published about his plight and money was donated by fans to help Langford. Eventually funding was obtained to pay for successful eye surgery. Langford was enshrined in the Ring Boxing Hall of Fame and Canada’s Sports Hall of Fame in 1955. He died a year later in Cambridge, Massachusetts, where he had been living in a private nursing home. In 1999, Langford was voted Nova Scotia’s top male athlete of the 20th century. In 2013, the jazz trio Tarbaby released a CD entitled “Ballad of Sam Langford.” Share this:

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