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7th Heaven

No Funerals and a Wedding [1.04]

Mrs. Morgan: Where's your father? He's all right, isn't he? Annie: Oh... um... yes, he is, he just... ah...

Simon

Don't worry, he's not dead, he just went back to Phoenix!

7th Heaven

No Funerals and a Wedding [1.04]

Ruthie: Mommy, are you always going to be here? Annie: What do you mean? Ruthie: Are you going to pass away like Grandma? Annie: Someday I will. But not for a very long time, so you shouldn't worry, ok? Ruthie: Ok. Annie: And I can promise you this. As long as I am here, no matter how old you get, you will always be able to count on me. I will always be there for you no matter what. Charles: [walks in] Annie? Annie: Daddy! Charles: Oh Annie, I wish I had lived up to that same promise you just made to Ruthie.

Annie

We can help each other get through this.

7th Heaven

No Funerals and a Wedding [1.04]

Mary: You know Mom? Sometimes when I'm really mad at Daddy... too mad to see him or talk to him... he gets right in my face and makes me tell him what's wrong! It drives me nuts, but I feel better after.

Annie

Mary, I would appreciate it if you wouldn't act so mature while I'm trying desperately to feel sorry for myself.

7th Heaven

No Funerals and a Wedding [1.04]

Lucy: It's not fair. Grandma should be here. It's like there's a party and she wasn't invited. Eric: Luce, I know it's weird having all these people here, and all this food, but... it's not really a party. It's just people who cared about your grandma and your mom, who are trying to-

Lucy

I don't mean today, Daddy. I mean life. It's going on without her. It just isn't fair.

7th Heaven

No Funerals and a Wedding [1.04]

Annie: I can't believe Daddy. Eric: He's still in shock. He's not himself.

Annie

No. Unfortunately, he's exactly himself.

7th Heaven

No Funerals and a Wedding [1.04]

Simon: Nobody seems to know where you go when you die. Ruthie: I know where. Simon: You don't either. Ruthie: Uh-huh! Simon: Fine, where? Ruthie: I don't know the name, but I know it's where I was before I was born. Simon: You were in Mommy's stomach before you were born. Ruthie: No, before that. Simon: I don't know where that is. I can't picture Grandma there.

Ruthie

Picture Grandma right here, in your heart.

7th Heaven

No Funerals and a Wedding [1.04]

Matt: [about Simon and Ruthie] The munchkins are still conked. Annie: Oh good, the poor things must be exhausted! Lucy: So am I! Mary: Me too. I feel like I could sleep for a week! Eric: I think it's been a rough time for us all. Grandpa Charles: [cheerfully] Don't worry, it's all gonna be ok!

Eric

Wouldn't this work better if I were consoling you?

7th Heaven

The Color of God [1.05]

Mary: Goodnight Keesha, goodnight Lucy. Lucy: Good night Mary, goodnight Keesha Keesha: [laughing] This is just like being at the Waltons! Lucy: Yeah except the Waltons weren't-

Mary & Keesha

Black? Yeah, we know.

7th Heaven

The Color of God [1.05]

Ruthie: Why do you think they burned your church? Lynn: I guess because they didn't want us to have a place to talk to God.

Ruthie

Oh.

7th Heaven

Halloween [1.06]

Ruthie: Daddy, are you bigger than the bad Man? Eric: Ruthie, I'm bigger, I'm stronger... and I work for God.

Ruthie

Yeah!

7th Heaven

Saturday [1.07]

Lucy: I've got some good news and bad news.

Ashley

I'm . I don't get bad news.

7th Heaven

Saturday [1.07]

Simon: Dad just goofed up, that's all.

Ruthie

Daddy doesn't goof up!

7th Heaven

Saturday [1.07]

Matt: Mary's a team player. She has basketball to fit in. Simon already knows who he is, and Ruthie's five. Eric: You forgot Lucy. Matt: No I didn't. She's the one you need to worry about. Eric: Why's that?

Matt

Well, because she always feels left out.

7th Heaven

Saturday [1.07]

Eric: Hey, what punishment can I give Simon and Ruthie for wandering off the way they did? Matt: Hmm... that's a tough one. Ruthie's so cute. Eric: Yeah. She reminds me so much of your mother. And Simon's so funny, it's hard to be mad at funny. Matt: You know, maybe you could not let them out of the house for a week.

Annie

Nice try not unless one of you wants to be locked up with them.

7th Heaven

Saturday [1.07]

Ruthie: You forgot our punishment, Daddy.

Simon

[to himself] Unbelievable.

7th Heaven

Saturday [1.07]

Simon: [in response to Eric and Annie kissing] How come you guys get to do that while we have to clean the bathroom? Eric: This is my reward for cutting the grass. Simon: Well, what do we get?

Annie

You get to live here for free.

7th Heaven

What Will People Say? [1.08]

Eric: What can I do for you? Jake: Let me get straight to the point. I heard that you and my wife are having an affair.

Eric

Yeah, I've heard those stories, but I don't believe any of them.

7th Heaven

What Will People Say? [1.08]

Jake: She'll never press charges against me. Never.

Eric

Where the hell have you been, Jake? This is 1996! Your wife doesn't have to press charges, she has two broken ribs. That's enough for the police; they'll press the charges.

7th Heaven

What Will People Say? [1.08]

Jake: [about his wife] You can't keep me away from her. I'll follow her to New York, you know.

Eric

I really wish you would, because I have a friend who's a judge there, and a couple other friends who work outside the system. You know the kind I mean? Bad people who've turned good but occasionally slip up? I'm sure they'll be glad to show you around New York.

7th Heaven

What Will People Say? [1.08]

[Simon sniffs Gabrielle's hair] Lunch lady: What are you going to have sonny, peas or corn? [Simon continues smelling Gabrielle's hair] I said "peas or corn?" Simon: I will have whatever she is having.

Gabrielle

Corn.

7th Heaven

See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil [1.09]

Matt: I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't even think. Eric: Those are all normal feelings and reactions. Matt: Not for Mom. She's been so calm about everything, and I just sat there while that piece of junk took all our stuff. Eric: What do you think you should have done? Matt: I don't know. Something. Anything but just sitting there and letting some guy rip off Mom's wedding ring.

Eric

You can't blame yourself. Whatever you did, it was perfect. It was perfect because it got you and Mom home safely. And it was just a ring. It wasn't our marriage.

7th Heaven

See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil [1.09]

Annie: And tell Eric I'm fine. Patrica: I have no idea of what you're talking about. Annie: [smiling] How long is Eric planning to work this afternoon? Patrica: He'll be done by 6:00. Annie: You wanna call him from here?

Patrica

No, I'll wait until I get home, so he'll think his plan worked.

7th Heaven

See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil [1.09]

Matt: I don't know what's wrong with me. I just can't pull it together.

Eric

Matt, last night, a man held a gun to your head and threatened your life. Now it would be nearly impossible for anyone to just pull it together.

7th Heaven

See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil [1.09]

Annie: I just keep thinking about what would have happened if just one thing had been different... if a gust of wind had suddenly kicked up, or a leaf had fallen on his shoulder, that man could have killed my son. Eric: You can't think about what could have been, you have to think about what is. You're ok, and Matt's ok, and God was watching out for you both that night; and you have to have faith that He always will.

Annie

I know. You're right. I know you're right. I just don't know how to stop being afraid.

7th Heaven

The Last Call for Aunt Julie [1.10]

Simon: Aunt Julie, you're hurting me! Julie: Shut up and give me the key to the liquor cabinet! Annie: [runs in the room and pulls her away] Get your hands off of him! Don't you ever touch my children! Julie: Annie! Oh, God. Oh, God!

Annie

Get out of this house now!

7th Heaven

The Last Call for Aunt Julie [1.10]

Julie: [while drunk] I didn't mean to hurt Simon. Annie: You did hurt Simon!

Julie

But I didn't mean to! I love him!

7th Heaven

The Last Call for Aunt Julie [1.10]

Matt: You know, Mom, isn't this a time where Aunt Julie really needs her family to be there for her, to help her through this?

Annie

I understand what you're saying, Matt. But I can't have you and your siblings put in danger. I won't allow it.

7th Heaven

The Last Call for Aunt Julie [1.10]

Ruthie: Is Aunt Julie going to die like Grandma? Matt: Well, I hope not, but it's up to God to decide when somebody dies.

Ruthie

God sure has a hard job.

7th Heaven

The Last Call for Aunt Julie [1.10]

Annie: Why do you have to do this yourself? Eric: Because I don't think she can get through this with anyone else, and I don't want to lose her. [Pause]

Annie

Fine. But no matter what happens, those kids are my first priority. So you're on your own.

7th Heaven

The Last Call for Aunt Julie [1.10]

Eric: Come on, Julie, we're going home. Jack: Who are you, the world's oldest Boy Scout? The lady doesn't want to go yet. Julie: That's right, Jack. You tell him!

Eric

[to Jack] I'm the last person you want to mess with right now. I'm taking my sister out of here, and if you don't get your hand off of me, I swear I will beat you to it.

7th Heaven

The Last Call for Aunt Julie [1.10]

Eric: [about keeping Julie at their house to detox] Why won't you let me do this?

Annie

Five reasons! Matt, Mary, Lucy, Simon and Ruthie!

7th Heaven

Now You See Me [1.11]

Matt: Mom, Dad, this is Tia. Tia: Nice to meet you. Eric: Nice to have you with us. Hope you weren't bored. Tia: No, I loved your sermon. It was very deep. Matt: I told you she was terrific. Eric: Oh, and perceptive, too. Tia: I think it's so neat to see anyone's parents at work. Work is so much a part of what people are whether it's working in the home like Mrs. Camden, or out in the community both are such important contributions to society. Annie: Thank you. I don't hear that often enough. Matt, if you two don't have any plans, would you like to bring Tia by for Sunday dinner? Matt: Well, I was thinking that we'd grab something on our own. Tia: Actually, if it's no trouble, Sunday dinner with the family sounds really nice. Matt: Um, sure. Ok. Tia: But only if you'll let me help, Mrs. Camden. Annie: Oh, well, it's great. Matt, would you mind stopping and getting some ice cream on the way home? Matt: No problem. See you then Tia: Bye-bye.

Annie

Nice meeting you.

7th Heaven

Now You See Me [1.11]

Tia: Thanks for dinner, Mrs. Camden. Could I help you clear the rest of these dishes? Annie: Oh, no. Relax. We're enjoying your company. Eric: Yeah, it's not often that anybody around here wants to talk about my sermons after church. Tia: I just think that frost poem you quoted was so beautiful. Annie: It was a good choice, wasn't it? Eric: Yeah, I'm surprised you're familiar with the death of the hired man. Tia: Yeah, it's in our English lit book, but I never heard it read out loud before. It was perfect. I mean, the safe choice would have been something like the road not taken. Annie: Exactly. Wouldn't it? You know, when Eric and I first started dating, he wrote some pretty wonderful poetry himself. Matt: I bet it wasn't anything you could read out loud in church, huh, dad? Eric: I wouldn't say that I would. Annie: It was very personal. Tia: Could you quote the frost poem again? Eric: Well, I think people around here have probably had enough eloquence for one day. Matt: That's right. We wouldn't want to have to call the poetry police. Tia: Please, just a line or two? Annie: Go on honey, I thought you were pretty terrific myself. Tia: Please? The line about home. Eric: "Home, he mocked gently. Yes, what else but home? It all depends on what you mean by home. Home is the place where, when you have to go there. They have to take you in." Tia: Excuse me. Annie: Matt, go see about her. Matt: Dad made her cry. Eric: Your mom picked the poem. Matt: I'm going. Eric: What do you think that was about? Annie: I don't know, but she's obviously in a lot of pain. Eric: Should I... Annie: Not yet. Tia: [Crying] Matt: Come on. Tell me what's going on. Tia: I'm sorry. I generally try not to burst into tears. Unless I'm alone. Matt: No, that's ok. We're, uh, we're big on emotions around here. Tia: I know it doesn't seem like any big deal, but my parents just got divorced. Matt: I'm--I'm sorry. Tia: You don't know how lucky you are to be part of this family.

Matt

Oh, oh, yes, I do... But I'm also lucky that I met you.

7th Heaven

With a Little Help From My Friends [1.12]

Simon: Can I have coffee? Annie: No, what's wrong? Simon: I'm a new father, that's what's wrong. I got absolutely no sleep last night. Me and Ruthie were suposed to take turns with the feedings, but I couldn't get Ruthie up! Annie: Why would you have to get up for feedings?

Simon

Well, every time the puppies ate, we fed Happy, so she wouldn't run out of milk!

7th Heaven

With a Little Help From My Friends [1.12]

Lucy: [after being surprised with a party] I didn't deserve this. Thanks. Mary: You're right, and you're welcome.

Matt

Don't listen to her, Luce, you deserve the best.

7th Heaven

America's Most Wanted [1.13]

Ruthie: Forget about the book. I have to learn "The Star Stapled Banner"!

Simon

It's called "The Star Spangled Banner", and you'll learn it in school.

7th Heaven

America's Most Wanted [1.13]

Simon: "Oh, say can you see..."

Ruthie

Who's Jose? Jose, can you see?

7th Heaven

America's Most Wanted [1.13]

Matt: Mary and I would like to go to dinner with John and Keisha tonight if that's ok. We'll be home early. Eric: Well, what's the occasion? Matt: No reason. We just haven't seen John and Keshia for a while, and we thought we'd grab a burger together. That's all. Eric: Where? Matt: The Varsity.

Annie

[to Eric] He's now covered who, what, when, where, and why.

7th Heaven

America's Most Wanted [1.13]

Eric: What's this? Matt: That's a glass. Eric: Did you buy it at the Varsity? Matt: No. I didn't buy it. Eric: Did you take it without paying for it? Matt: Dad, everyone takes something from the Varsity. It's like a school ritual.

Eric

It's like stealing. No, it is stealing.

7th Heaven

America's Most Wanted [1.13]

Eric: [to the manager of the Varsity] I'm Camden. I'm Matt's father. Manager: I'm not dropping the charges. Eric: Just hear me out first. Manager: Ok, but I'm not dropping the charges. Eric: My son knows he was wrong. That's why he apologized. Matt's learned his lesson. Manager: That's not the problem. The problem is that the rest of those kids haven't learned anything. I lose thousands of dollars every year. If I raise the prices of food to cover the losses, I have no customers. Kids shouldn't steal, and they should learn that if they do, there are consequences. If I let Matt off the hook, they'll think they can get away with anything. Eric: This isn't about all those other kids. They didn't come in here and apologize to you. This is about my boy. He tried to do the right thing, and he's getting punished for it. What kind of message is that? Manager: It says there are consequences if you break the law. That's a message I'd like to get out. You got a problem with that? Eric: Yeah, I do. Isn't the law supposed to be about justice and mercy as well as punishment?

Manager

I guess we'll find out tomorrow in court, won't we?

7th Heaven

America's Most Wanted [1.13]

Ruthie: [singing] "Whose broad stripes and bright stars, through the..." Hmm, hmm, hmm. "fight..." Simon: It's "perilous fight." Ruthie: What does perilous mean? Simon: It means dangerous. Ruthie: Then why don't they just say that? Simon: Because that's how they talked in the olden days. Ruthie: Why? Simon: I don't know why. I just want to get some sleep. Ruthie: [pauses, starts singing again] "Through the dangerous fight..." Simon: You can't change the words. It's our national anthem! Ruthie: But nobody understands it! Simon: It's not meant to be understood. It's like opera.

Ruthie

I understand Oprah. I watch her on TV!

7th Heaven

America's Most Wanted [1.13]

Simon: [to Ruthie] No, "hailed" is not a bad word, and neither is "hell" unless you say something like "Go to hell!" Eric: [walks in] What did you say?! Simon: Oh, um. I was just trying to explain that "hell" is not a bad word. It's just how you use it, like if you say something like "There's a heaven and a hell", that would be ok, right?

Eric

Yes, that would be ok, but that's not what I heard you say.

7th Heaven

Seven Is Enough [1.14]

Annie: [about George] So you want him? Eric: I don't know. We did always say we'd adopt after Mary. Annie: Then after Lucy. Eric: Then after Simon. Annie: And now it's after Ruthie. Eric: We'd be crazy to even consider it, I guess. Right?

Annie

We are crazy. We'll talk to the kids and George tomorrow.

7th Heaven

Seven Is Enough [1.14]

Eric: [when he and Annie want to adopt George] I don't see where your opinion fits into this. Colonel: That's wonderful. You're dreaming again. Who's gonna pay for the kid? The adoption? The court costs? And let's not even get into how you're going to send him to college, or any of your other five, for that matter. Eric: They'll get to college the same way I did, Dad. They'll get jobs. Colonel: You still resent me for not paying your way. Eric: I don't still resent you. I never resented you for that. Colonel: Yes, you did then, and you still do. But you and your sister needed to learn that you have to work for the things that are important. Eric: I know that, Dad. I get it. Colonel: Yeah, you get it because we taught you the value of hard work and discipline! Eric: And I'm happy to credit you accordingly!

Ruth

We just thought you might already have your hands full.

7th Heaven

Seven Is Enough [1.14]

Eric: [when his parents say they're going to adopt George] George is not your average kid. He's had a tough life. The adoption itself is gonna be hard on him. He's gonna need a lot of love and support. Colonel: And you have a corner on that market? Eric: No, of course not, but support of any kind isn't one of your strong suits. Ruth: That's not true. Eric: Do you ever remember holding me or Julie when we were upset? Did you ever allow us to express any of our feelings? Colonel: If you're asking me if we wiped your noses and held your hands, then the answer is no. No, we were too busy keeping a roof over your heads and food on the table! Eric: Well, there's more to parenting than that, Dad. Colonel: Oh, and what does that mean?

Eric

It means that you are not the parents for George.

7th Heaven

Seven Is Enough [1.14]

George: [to the Camdens] Why can't you adopt me? I'll be good, and I'll stay out of your way. You won't even know I'm there! Colonel: George, listen to me. Eric is smart about these things. He knows what's right. He's a good man, a smart man, and if you're lucky, you'll grow up to be like him. Anyway, why would you want to live with a couple of old war horses like us? You've got a whole house full of great kids right here. George: They're all dreamers. Ruth: There's nothing wrong with a little dreaming. Colonel: No. It's time you settled down and started a little dreaming of your own.

George

I already did. My dream was to be with you.

7th Heaven

Happy's Valentine [1.15]

Annie: That was Patricia. She and Morgan were wondering if we'd like to drive up to Stedmond Caves tonight and go camping! Simon and Ruthie: Yes! Annie: No. No. Just me and your dad. Eric: And what, we'll put the kids in a kennel? Annie: No. They can stay here with the Hamilton kids. Eric: And who's gonna babysit? Matt: Not me. Eric: No, of course not. Who would keep an eye on you? Matt: I'm 17.

Eric

Exactly.

7th Heaven

Happy's Valentine [1.15]

[As the Hamilton kids are coming in] Annie: Hey, you know, don't stay up too late and um... don't eat too much junk food and have a good time!

Matt

How are they gonna have a good time if they can't eat junk food and can't stay up late?

7th Heaven

Happy's Valentine [1.15]

Ruthie: Mommy, do we have to give the puppies away? Annie: Yes, honey it's time. And they have a good home to go to. Ruthie: We have a good home too. Annie: Yes, but I think they starting to get so big that they are getting in Happy's way. Ruthie: I get in your way, and you still keep me around. Annie: Ah. It's not the same, sweetheart. It would be like you living here when you are 30. Ruthie: I have to live somewhere else when I'm 30? Annie: You'll probably want to live somewhere else when you're 30.

Ruthie

Yeah! Maybe even when I'm 7 or maybe 8.

7th Heaven

Brave New World [1.16]

Simon: [as he is preparing Ruthie for the first day of school] A lot of kids cry when their moms drop them off on the first day of pre-kindergarten. Don't do that. Once inside the classroom, you'll probably do some counting. Beads, Cheerios, or something. Don't eat them, whatever they are. Then you'll probably color, glue, maybe cut. Don't get regular scissors. They'll only tear if you're a leftie, which you are. Ruthie: [holds up her thumb] Right. Simon: Your other right. Don't worry. After that, you're pretty much in the home stretch. Then you'll take a nap, you'll have a snack. Stay away if it's coconut, and then Mom will come to pick you up. Oh, yeah, and never, ever pick anything. It will come back to haunt you. Ruthie: No crying, no coconut, no picking. Got it.

Simon

Good. I'm glad we had this little talk. Welcome to the big leagues.

7th Heaven

Brave New World [1.16]

Annie: I hate to interrupt this seminar, but one of us has a very big day tomorrow. Simon: No kidding! My day is completely booked. School, lunch, recess, more school, Happy, and then homework. Where does the time go?

Annie

I have no idea, Simon.

7th Heaven

Brave New World [1.16]

Lucy: You know, when I called you last night, your mom said you weren't back from my house yet. Suzanne: Maybe she didn't hear me come in. Lucy: I guess.

Suzanne

You know, it's a big house, and my mom's kind of a flake. You do the math.

7th Heaven

Brave New World [1.16]

Annie: [to Ruthie] What's the matter, honey? Not too hungry today, huh? Simon: Opening day jitters, Mom. [to Ruthie] Listen, eat something light. A little toast, maybe. Throwing up at school is just as bad as crying. Eric: Simon. Simon: What? I'm just giving Ruthie the benefit of my experience. I mean, come on, let's face it. It has been a while since you or Mom were at school. [Simon leaves] Annie: Honey, it's gonna be okay. You know the teacher, and she's really, really nice, and you're gonna make lots of friends.

Ruthie

Fine. I just don't like this cereal.

7th Heaven

Brave New World [1.16]

Ruthie: Talk to the hand. Simon: What? Ruthie: Talk to the hand 'cause the ears ain't listening. Simon: Where did you learn that?

Ruthie

From my new friend Skyler. He's a superhero.

7th Heaven

Brave New World [1.16]

Annie: [to Ruthie] Honey, I thought you liked going to school. Ruthie: I like peanut butter, but I don't want it every day. If I had known pre-kindergarten was every day, I would never have signed up for it. This is all your fault! [punches Simon in the arm] Annie: Ruthie Camden! Where did you learn to do something like that?

Ruthie

School, and I'm never going back, ever!

7th Heaven

Brave New World [1.16]

Eric: So your sister shoved a guy's head in the toilet?

Matt

Up to the collar. You would have been proud.

7th Heaven

Brave New World [1.16]

Michael: [after Mary dunks his head in a toilet] I want to file assault charges. Principal: Fine. And Mary, I assume you'll want to file sexual harassment charges? [Long silence; Michael looks baffled] Principal: What did you think that was? Messing around? Joking? Having fun? It's not. It's sexual harassment. Mr. Towner: You know, I'm not the least bit surprised that you feel this way. Principal: Mr. Towner, I know you'd like to believe that this is about "sisterhood" when actually, it's a matter of right and wrong. You see, your belief is incorrect, and holding fast to it at this point really isn't going to help anyone, including your son. So, Mary, how do you want to handle this? Mary: [pauses] It's over. I just want to let it go. Principal: Really? I'm not inclined to be as generous as you are. [to Michael] You talk trash, you write trash, and you dare to snap this woman's bra strap? At the very least, your head is gonna wind up in a toilet! You harass one more human being in this building, and you will find that you have no friends here. Got it? Michael: Yes.

Principal

Good. Now go spread the word. I know you're good at that.

7th Heaven

Choices [1.17]

Matt: You gotta trust me on this, 'cause when it comes to this kind of stuff, guys don't think like girls. Mary: I know. I'm sorry. Matt: Where'd you get that dress? Mary: [crying] I stole it. I didn't think it was a big deal! Matt: So you put it on and went to a fraternity party? Mary: I know, it was stupid. I'm sorry.

Matt

It's OK. But you should know: From now on I'll be watching you like a fox/hawk.

7th Heaven

Choices [1.17]

[Simon and Ruthie find a $50 bill on the sidewalk] Ruthie: Maybe we should give it back.

Simon

To who? The sidewalk?

7th Heaven

Choices [1.17]

Ruthie: How about a little tiny goldfish? They won't be no trouble. Annie: "Any". Ruthie: Any what? Annie: A goldfish won't be any trouble.

Ruthie

I know. So can I have one?

7th Heaven

Faith, Hope, and the Bottom Line [1.18]

Simon: Well, I know my phone number when someone asks for it.

Ruthie

And still no one calls.

7th Heaven

Faith, Hope, and the Bottom Line [1.18]

Eric: I just can't go for a security system over a person.

Lou

And that's what makes you a caring, compassionate minister... and a lousy businessman.

7th Heaven

It's About George... [1.19]

Colonel: Hello. Jimmy: Hey. Grandma Ruth: "Hey" is for horses. Are you a farmer, Mr. Moon? Jimmy: No. Colonel: Do you know who I am? Jimmy: Lucy's grandfather?

Colonel

I am John Camden, United States Marines!

7th Heaven

It's About George... [1.19]

Julie: I don't think I can do this.

Matt

That's what you need: A warm relationship with your father.

7th Heaven

Say Good-bye [1.20]

Mary: How about this dress? Lucy: Sure. Whatever. You'll look great. Mary: Or maybe I could just shave my head?

Lucy

Sure. Whatever. You'll look great.

7th Heaven

Dangerous Liaisons (1) [1.21]

Eric: Honey, I think you need to sit down now and try to relax. Annie: Bite me!

Eric

"Bite me"?!

7th Heaven

Dangerous Liaisons (1) [1.21]

Matt: Wow! What did you do to make your hair look so blonde and... um... beautiful?

Lucy

I'm trying to figure out if you're lying, and if I think you are, I will be killing Simon tonight!

7th Heaven

Dangerous Liaisons (2) [1.22]

Matt: Great. Even with Mary in the hospital, Dad still finds a way to teach me a lesson.

Simon

Well, you've kind of got to admire him for that.

7th Heaven

Dangerous Liaisons (2) [1.22]

Eric: Your hair looks nice, Luce. Lucy: Nice or sexy?

Eric

Uh... nice. Definitely nice. If my 13-year-old daughter had sexy hair, I'd shave her head.

7th Heaven

Turn, Turn, Turn [11.01]

Annie: [about Lucy] She'll come around.

Kevin

I don't think she's going to come around anytime soon and I'm tired of her being angry all the time. I mean, I understand it, but I'm tired of it.

7th Heaven

Turn, Turn, Turn [11.01]

Lucy: I've been doing some thinking over the summer, because I didn't want to decide too quickly, but I think I've decided now. I don't ever want to try to have kids again, Kevin. Even if it's nobody's fault. It's you and me and Savannah and these guys (points to the dogs). That's a big enough family for me.

Kevin

I understand. And if you decide to change your mind, I understand that too.

7th Heaven

Turn, Turn, Turn [11.01]

Martin: What's ridiculous is the fact that you even want to be a minister. I think you just want to be a Camden. You think that if you're a minister, then maybe Simon Camden will start to like you better, maybe even love you, maybe even marry you. Then you can be a Camden. And when I say "you," I do mean the old you as well as the new you. I mean, isn't that what you really want--to be a Camden?

Sandy

Listen, I think you should go.

7th Heaven

And Tonight's Specials Are... [11.02]

T-Bone: I mean, don't you get a little tired of being around them? Lucy: No. They're my family!

T-Bone

Exactly. You can't talk to your family about your family. I mean, that's how you ended up losing it in church. You need a friend to talk to.

7th Heaven

And Tonight's Specials Are... [11.02]

Annie: It's going to be all right, Kevin. Everything will be all right. Just go home to Lucy, and hang out with her, be with her, talk to her, let her know how much you care about her.

Kevin

No offense, Mom, but I don't think things are going to get better. In fact, I think they're just gonna get worse.

7th Heaven

And Tonight's Specials Are... [11.02]

Lucy: I can't believe I spent the whole day hanging out with a teenager who has a crush on me. And I really can't believe that he actually made me feel better.

Eric

You never know where help is gonna come from.

7th Heaven

A Pain in the Neck [11.03]

Stanley: What happened to you?

Eric

I'm just having a bad day.

7th Heaven

Don't Ax, Don't Tell [11.04]

Eric: [to Sam & David] So, starting today, we are going to have school right here at home.

Sam

Is that legal?

7th Heaven

Don't Ax, Don't Tell [11.04]

Ms. Margo: Lots of women fall in love with married men. Eric: Yeah, lots of women do and it's always a mistake. Ms. Margo: It can't always be a mistake. Eric: Yes, it can. You know, I don't say never or always very often, but I'm saying always here because it's true. It is always a mistake. Ms. Margo: Still, it happens.

Eric

It doesn't happen here.

7th Heaven

Don't Ax, Don't Tell [11.04]

Eric: You can think of how you want to feel and act as if you actually feel that way, and you will feel that way. You can decide that your feelings are completely inappropriate and choose some other feelings. Ms. Margo: What if I don't want to choose? What if I want to feel what I feel? What if I want to follow my heart? Eric: What if you let your mind lead what you want your heart to follow? And what if you choose good things for yourself? What if you even love yourself? Ms. Margo: Hey, what if you love me? Eric: But I don't. I don't love you, Ms. Margo. I don't want to love you. Ms. Margo: Could you choose to love me?

Eric

(long pause) I could...but I'm not going to. Why would I? I love my wife. I love my children. I love my grandchildren. I even love myself.

7th Heaven

You Take the High Road (1) [11.07]

Lucy: I think you've been over there a little too long because you're starting to sound like a brat! And look here, little sister, when Mom and Dad show up, you better act as if you're happy to see them. Ruthie: Why? Lucy: Because they're your parents! They're your mom and dad, and you should be grateful that you even have a mother and father!

Ruthie

Yeah, well, I'm not right now, okay? They just want to ruin my life!

7th Heaven

You Take the High Road (1) [11.07]

Ruthie: You don't understand. This is my life we're talking about. It's not your life, it's mine. I love it here. I am perfectly happy being halfway across the world, away from the Church, and Dad and the school where you and Matt and Mary and Simon all went to. I'm not the preacher's kid anymore, I'm just Camden. Do you know how great it is to just be Camden without everyone knowing I'm the preacher's kid? I love it. I'm a normal girl here.I just want to be normal!

Lucy

Normal is completely overrated. And quit whining about being the preacher's kid. What's wrong with being the preacher's kid? There are a lot worse things to be. You know, maybe you'd like to be the daughter of a.....a bad person!

7th Heaven

You Take the High Road (1) [11.07]

Lucy: [about Eric and Annie leaving to get Ruthie from Scotland] They just decided to take off, okay? Ruthie: And you let them? Lucy: I had nothing to do with it. They're our parents. They do what they want. Ruthie: Yeah, well, what about me? When do I get to do what I want?

Lucy

Ruthie, they let you stay in Scotland for the semester. You were supposed to come home at the end of the summer. I think they've been pretty generous in letting you do what you want!

7th Heaven

You Take the High Road (1) [11.07]

Ruthie: I don't want to be just sitting there and watching Dad be sick. I mean, he's going to be fine. He's had heart surgery before!

Lucy

That.....that's incredibly selfish, don't you think?

7th Heaven

...And I'll Take the Low Road (2) [11.08]

Ruthie: [about Eric] I just don't know if I'm strong enough to be around him right now, Mom.

Annie

Oh, Ruthie. It's all going to be fine. It's all going to be fine. It has to be. Come on, your dad's waiting outside. Give us a tour of Edinburgh. We want to see your school and your friends. And we want you to know that you can come back here. We'll help you, Ruthie. If this is where you really want to be, then....one day. Not now, but one day.

7th Heaven

...And I'll Take the Low Road (2) [11.08]

Annie: Honey, didn't I explain to you that your dad's having some heart problems? Ruthie: Yeah, I know and I feel really badly that he's not feeling well. But Mom, Dad's always going to have heart problems and this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for me. Annie: [shocked] I, uh.....I guess I must be feeling jetlag, because I'm suddenly feeling so.....irritable, or confused. Yeah, maybe that's it. Confusion. I'm going to go back to the hotel and get some rest. I'll see you tonight at dinner. Oh, and you think about this: Scotland is always going to be here. I'll see you later, Ruthie.

Ruthie

[after Annie leaves] They just don't get it.

7th Heaven

...And I'll Take the Low Road (2) [11.08]

Ruthie: Nobody cares about me or how this crisis is affecting my life! Lucy: We're not going to continue to pay for this anymore. We shouldn't have even paid for it in the first place. We just wanted to encourage you to be your own person and take interest outside your own little world, and now....now it seems that you've completely forgotten where you came from and who your family is. You know, we love you, Ruthie. Ruthie: I know, and I love you too. But Mary's not going to give up her family and come home, and Matt's not going to give up his practice and his family to come home and Simon's not going to drop out of his senior year of college and come home. So why do I have to?

Lucy

Because you can, and because he wants you to.

7th Heaven

...And I'll Take the Low Road (2) [11.08]

Eric: Ruthie, I just.....I really want you home right now. Ruthie: But don't you think that's kind of.....selfish? Eric: I beg your pardon? Ruthie: Dad, you've been living with heart problems for years now, and you're probably going to spend the rest of your life living with heart problems. That doesn't mean I have to come home and watch you have heart problems, does it? Eric: Uh, no, I guess not, but on the other hand, I really want you to come home. I need you to come home, and the entire family needs you to come home, and I'm afraid that as a parent, I'm going to make a decision for you that you're not going to be happy with. You're coming home, Ruthie. You're coming home with me and your mom. Life isn't always about you. Sometimes it's about other people or sometimes even about your parents and your family. I need my family around me right now. And I don't care if you think that's selfish. Fine, I'm selfish. I get to be selfish. I'm the one who's in need right now, and I need you home. I could leave this decision up to you, but you're 16, and....I'm afraid you might really regret it later, so I'll decide for you. Ruthie: You really think you can decide for me?

Eric

If you can't make the right decision yourself, then yeah. Yes, I can.

7th Heaven

Good News For Almost Everyone [11.21]

David: [to Margaret on the phone] We're over at Lucy's house and we're hungry. Me and Sam. Sam: and me! David: [putting the phone off his mouth] You're Sam!

Sam

I know, I was correcting your English!

7th Heaven

Good News For Almost Everyone [11.21]

Kevin: [spots Ruthie and T-Bone making out in a corner] Excuse me! Ruthie: Oh, hi, um T-Bone: We made up! Kevin: I can see that. Come on we got to go to the hospital. Your dad's there. Ruthie: But when I left this morning he was fine. Kevin: I know, it's good news. I thought you'd like to be there when we all got the good news. Ruthie: But we can't just leave school.

Kevin

Sure you can! There will be plenty of places to make out at the hospital!

7th Heaven

Good News For Almost Everyone [11.21]

Martin: Ruthie, I lived at your house. You were like a little sister to me, and then you.....and then you grew up. And then I grew up, when Sandy and I had a baby--at least I tried to grow up, and I tried to do the right thing and marry Sandy. That's what I felt I should do. I love my son, and I'd do anything for him, and I really do care about her. But my heart was just never really in it, and that's maybe why I screwed up. I guess I've never really wanted things to work out, and whatever chance I had with her, with the relationship--a romantic relationship--well, I screwed that up. Ruthie: Isn't this the conversation you should be having with Sandy? Martin': That's kind of funny, because I've had this conversation with Sandy. This was our conversation last weekend, when she told me she was marrying Jonathan, the doctor she's been going out with. But we didn't talk like you and I talk. It was more of a--it was more of a lecture from her than a conversation. Ruthie: You're all over the place. What are you trying to say to me? And whatever it is, you should start with an apology for not telling me that you were also dating Jane. Martin: I'm sorry, I am. I like Jane, she's really attractive......but not as attractive as you. I'm really physically attracted to you, and it feels incredibly awkward saying that, and also, I can't talk to Jane the way I can talk to you. And I think that if we can just start over, if we can agree to date each other and not date anyone else, and if you can let me be more than a friend.....I think we could be really good together. Ruthie: What? Martin: I keep trying to treat you like a friend or a sister, but you're older now, I'm older, and that's not the way I see you. And we did kiss.

Ruthie

[pause] Yeah, we did.

7th Heaven

And Away We Go [11.22]

Margaret: Are you ever coming back? Eric: I don't know that, either. Margaret: But what about everything here? Your home, your things?

Eric

Oh. You know, I've lost my enthusiasm for "things", so......I don't really care.

7th Heaven

And Away We Go [11.22]

Ruthie: Martin, you're not in love with me. I really am like a sister to you, and when you do find the right woman to be with, I'll be happy to baby-sit for you, okay? Martin: But all this time, you've been, like, wanting to go out with me, and now that I want to go out with you-- Ruthie: It's too late. I found someone else. Martin: For now. But you're 17. Maybe you'll change your mind. Ruthie: I can't. I have his name tattooed on my back. Martin: Why'd you do that? Ruthie: I don't know. It was an impulse, a bad impulse. It was the stupidest thing I've ever done in my life. Martin: So you're staying with him because of a stupid mistake? Ruthie: He's staying with me. We're staying together, and if we're lucky, we'll be together for the rest of our lives. Martin: But his mother is...you know... Ruthie: I know. And despite how she treated him and who she is, the fact that he treats me and other women so respectfully...it just amazes me. He amazes me. I'm in love with T-Bone. Martin: So you don't think you'll be taking off for Scotland next year, when you graduate? Ruthie: But if I go, I'm dragging T-Bone with me. He loves Scotland, and there's a whole world out there--a world I want to see. And I want to see it with him. Maybe we'll go somewhere we've never been for college, or maybe we'll take a year off after high school and just travel together. I don't know what will happen, but I do know how I feel. Martin: Well, someday, I hope to find a woman who feels the same way about me. (they hug) Ruthie: Bye, Martin.

Martin

Bye, Ruthie. [she leaves]

7th Heaven

It Takes Two, Baby [3.01]

Simon: Just in case what isn't better? Ruthie: My morning sickness. Simon: Oh, give it up already. Ruthie: MOMMY! Eric: Simon, be nicer to your sister. This isn't easy on her and she's just a little girl.

Simon

You say it like it's a weakness or something.

7th Heaven

It Takes Two, Baby [3.01]

Matt: I just want to know if Mom is feeling any better? Eric: She can't fit into her pants, she's not gonna be happy until she can. Meanwhile, I have to find some place to take her for our 20th anniversary that's appropriately romantic, yet doesn't remind her that I'm the one that got her too big to fit in her pants. I've been down this road five times and it's a long cranky road. Matt: I remember when you put on a few pounds you were cranky too. Eric: Yeah, but that was different. I wasn't providing a nurturing environment for a developing human being. And I have to say if I were... I think I be thrilled. I'd be elated... I'd be... Annie: ...Miserable. You know, you think you know what it's like, but you don't, you really don't. You know nothing.

Eric

Nothing.

7th Heaven

It Takes Two, Baby [3.01]

Annie: How is that I'm the one who has to watch every single morsel of food that I put into my mouth, and yet those crumbs turn into pounds and more pounds and more pounds, despite the fact that I've already puked most of what I've eaten the day before by the time I get out of bed the next morning? Ruthie: Yeah, we're fat and we're sick. Annie: And tired you know I'm really, really tired. It's not like having a baby at twenty or thirty, I'm.... Ruthie: Old. Annie: And I've got six months to go. Six more months. Six months of trying to wear clothes that make me look... Eric: Like you're having a baby. Our baby. Ruthie: Yeah, our big fat baby. Annie: Yeah, she's right. You know that I was seven months pregnant with Matt before I was in maternity clothes. And now, at three months look at me, I'm fat. I'm old. I'm tired. And I'm fat. Ruthie: Yeah, I can't get in nothing of mine, neither. Eric: You can't get into anything Ruthie, you don't fit into your clothes because you're getting bigger and that's because you're getting older.

Ruthie

Yeah, just like Mommy.

7th Heaven

It Takes Two, Baby [3.01]

Eric: It's going to be okay. Annie: It's not gonna be okay! It's only gonna get worse. I'm only gonna get fatter, and older, and tireder, and fatter! Then, when I'm at my oldest and tiredest and fattest, then I have to give birth to my fattest baby ever, probably with the world record head!

Ruthie

Yeah. If you ask me, the only thing you daddies have to do to make a baby is the fun part.

7th Heaven

It Takes Two, Baby [3.01]

Eric: You know, maybe your tummy will be feeling better by lunchtime. Mommy's always is. Ruthie: Give me an extra paper bag, just in case it isn't. Simon: Just in case what isn't? Ruthie: My morning sickness. Simon: Oh, give it up! You're not sick, you're not tired, and you're not fat. You're just trying to get attention. Ruthie: MOMMY! [runs upstairs]

Simon

Yeah. Whenever they're hurt, they run to Mommy, even when Dad is standing right there.

7th Heaven

Drunk Like Me [3.02]

Annie: You and Simon need some guy stuff to do together. I don't want him to feel left out.

Eric

No, being left out is Lucy's job.

7th Heaven

Drunk Like Me [3.02]

Lucy: Mom, if you had to guess, what would you say the babies were?

Annie

Girls.

7th Heaven

Cutters [3.03]

Annie: [to Matt] You look terrible. Eric: It finally happened. Our son got rejected by a girl. Annie: I can't believe it. Not my Matt! Why, you are the most handsomest guy on Earth, and if a girl doesn't like you, then something must be wrong with her. Eric: Maybe your mom could call her. Matt: You know, you two are really starting to sound like June and Ward Cleaver.

Eric

Really? Because up until now, you kind of reminded me of Wally. Wally never got rejected.